#most people use he/they/it for me but idrc at this point

[fallenclan]

what are your pronouns? (i talk about this blog a LOT to my friends but realized i didn’t actually know your pronouns so i’ve js been using “they”, sorry 😅)

they is fine! i use all pronouns pretty much, including neos

[c4n1d43cup1d]

Some hogcanons. notes (me rambling) under the cut

So silver was the reason i wanted to make this in the first place despite him looking the most on model (not entirely obviously, but i don't have many hcs for him). Mostly i wanted to draw his height compared to the other hedgehogs since him being freakishly tall despite being younger than sonic and shadow is funny. I saw someone say hes probably the most conventionally attractive hedgehog and i think that's true, hes a pretty boy and his fur/quills are really sleek and well maintained. The fluff on his chest is less spikey and more fluffy looking plus i put some fluff in his ears as well. I think his paws and nails are black and he doesn't wear eyeliner his lashes are just really long and hes got black markings on his eyes. Coming back to this after writing Amy's desc but i think hes genderqueer in some way idk maybe bigender i need to study him under a microscope some more every character i touch becomes transgender

Sonic has a few more added details, i like giving him a little nick in his ear and top surgery scars because that hog is trans. I haven't really seen many people give him stylized top surgery scars surprisingly, i tried to make his look kind of lightning bolty because uh something about him being fast. idk man. i think i imagined its similar to what itd look like for him to run in a zigzag? whatever i think it looks cool. I think his claws are kind of uneven and he doesn't really care too much about how they look especially since he just has them under gloves most of the time

Amy is fat because i said so, also i gave her wavier quills and heart markings everywhere. Her ears might look a little strange since it like implies her skin is making that heart shape but i imagine thats her fur spiking into the point. Her nails are painted the same red that shadows markings and stuff are mostly because i think them being besties is cute like. i see shadamy as a queer platonic relationship. Theyve always been my favorites im going to to make them as close as i want. Anyway, i think she and sonic are tied for having the shortest ears, and hers are the rounest (might make them even rounder the next time i draw her) also not entirely related to her design but i think shes transfem and genderfluid.

Shadow my son. im taking custody from black doom and gerald. anyway, i have the most headcanons for him because he is my absolute favorite guy ever he rots my brain. I think he and Amy are the same height, his rocket shoes are like platform/heels and so when he has them on he looks like Sonic's height or maybe a teeny tiny bit taller. I give his quills extra little spikes for no reason other than i think its cute, i could bullshit that its a black arms thing but idrc. What are black arms things though are his eyes and claws, his scelera is a more yellow compared to everyone elses (jaundiced as my friend put it. thanks endy) and i didn't draw it but his pupils are slits. Claws are long but are even longer when all the way out (retractable) his gloves are thick enough that he doesn't pierce them but he probably has a few spare pairs. Also not pictured but black arms related: his teeth are fucking razors, larger than the other hedgehogs and also serrated because i think thats cool. his tail is the longest out of all of them though i think it used to be longer but was lopped off in the name of science and never properly grew back. also his inhibitor rings are connected to a sort of device that does the task of being a proper gateway between his internal energy and the rings themselves, i didn't draw them but essentially its like a smaller ring that is embedded into his wrists i think. also hes trans but in a sort of alien way, i think the black arms can do the clownfish genderswap thing and shadow has it to a somewhat lesser degree its like an internal tshot i guess idfk

ok yeah thats all if u made it to the end thanks for reading the ramblings of a mad man

[riddle-on-the-milk-carton]

Bench trio headcanons???? In this economy??? More likely than you think??? But they’re mainly just cbenchtrio being gross feral kids (affectionate)

-Tommy and tubbo both have curly hair but Tubbos is a lot curlier which is why his is messy, Tommy’s is more wavy in its natural state but is just really, really tangled

-people have tried to get Tommy to brush out his hair and stuff but it just gets really tangled and full of debris, really fast

-when he was a kid wilbur used to cut it but he was REALLY BAD at cutting hair and had no experience so he’d just cut it so short it couldn’t get tangled

-Tommy and tubbo have given each other lice/bugs more than once, and if one gets sick the other would be all “cough on me”

-cran got (reluctantly) pulled into their illness-sharing-trio

-ctommy is transfem but kept her name and hasn’t transitioned yet, it’s a “I’m probably a girl but I got issues rn so idrc about that”

-to contrast cran has really fine/thin, straight hair

-as surprising as it is cranboo is the Least Showered out of all of them (cus enderman/water)

-cran also gets sick really easily and has a the immune system of a Victorian child

-tommy dosent cut his nails and bites them into points

-you’d think it’s for a lore reason but it’s really because tubbo can’t peel fruit anymore after the fireworks so he grew them out so he could peel them for him

-cranboo actually has really messy handwriting in print, Tubbos is neater but Tommy’s is really messy cursive cuz wilbur taught him

-they all share food, clothes, and while they technically have separate beds they’d rather all sleep in one together like the powerpuff girls

-they end up sleeping bad but all of them sleep worse alone so they like it anyways, Tommy talks and drools in his sleep and wakes up constantly, tubbo kicks and moves around a lot and ranboo has enderwalks and will put their freezing cold hands/feet on everyone else as well as taking up a lot of space in the bed

-tubbo and ranboo had a bunk bed but they both kept on falling off so they just pushed the mattresses together on the ground and use it as kitchen storage

-Tommy has ectopic canines (like meeeeeeee :3 shameless projection)

Phil got him braces as a kid but he kept on getting stuff stuck in them and popping them out by eating popcorn and candy and shit so eventually phil just gave up after #50 of getting them reapplied, so his teeth are less crooked but he still has his canines

-cran is noise sensitive because of autism, Tommy has no volume control because of autism, tubbo is both loud and scared of loud sounds due to trauma (and autism-)

-Tommy also can’t hear for the life of him bc explosión damage and has tinnitus

-SBI used to play-fight constantly and clingyduo does to but the first time cran saw they were all “STOP FIGHTING GUYS!!😰” and got scared they were real fighting

-alliumduo are both lab grown creations while Tubbo was Schlatts illegitimate love child he left in a box on the street, he wishes he was grown in a lab too

-cran sleeps in long johns for no reason other than it’s funny

-tubbo had blond straight hair as a kid but puberty made it more of a sandy-brown and curly

-cran has readers and bad eyes bc crying burns his eyes too so he’s legally blind

-tommy hate wearing shoes and will track mud in everywhere (he’s a shoes off autistic)

-the beeduo cabin is covered in wall graffiti, Michael has joined in

-Michael is nonverbal

-he also wears a helmet because he has horrendous balance and will hit his bogas toddler head on things

-most people aren’t neurotypical here but nobody is actually diagnosed or medicated

-Tommy chews gum all the time and really loudly, it started by wanting to be like wilbur but wil would never share his cigarettes so he would chew gum to copy him

-beeduo are one of the better parents on the server, but by our standards they wouldn’t be the best, they’re the equivalent of Teen Parents, and they really try their best and love and care for Michael but they aren’t the best influence regardless (they think Adult Swim is a good cartoon for kids to watch type)

-tubbo watched a lot of South Park by that metric as a kid which is why he has the Tweek fit on in his og skin

-they definitely have a lot to learn and are trying to learn as much as they can but will mess up and fumble a lot

-a lot of headcanons for the benchtrio era show them as all cute and cottagecore and while that’s all nice I’d love to see more of them as kind of gross teenagers, they’ve all grown up pretty heavily neglected (even with Phil in the picture) so I like to think they are like recently graduated barely-adults and are all kind of gross and messy and imperfect

-their house is also pretty messy, they have the previously state Bunk Bed as kitchen storage, the walls are destroyed and full of dents from roughhousing, they got drawings and knickknacks all over the walls and wild animals in the house, there’s a clothesline cutting across the rafters,

-foolish is devastated by how hard he worked on their home only to see it looking like a stoner cave minus the weed

-Tommy and wilbur are teen runaways and ran away in the Camar van (it was Wilbur’s old Loded Diper ass garage band van) Phil was a good parent they were just idiot teenagers

-when Phil joined he found them as now adults and they have a lot of awkwardness

-Tommy has hella athsma from inhaling Wilbur’s secondhand smoke while wilbur has borderline lung cancer

[bl00dn0t3-x3]

👑cody's intro ˗ˏˋ ☆ ˎˊ˗

this will continue to be updated :) also i have a tree

backup account: @bl00dn0t3-backup2

vent account: @bl00dn0t3-venting

𐕣 name: Cody, but you can also call me Logan or any other name in my pronouns.page <3

♇ pronouns: he/him +neos (found also in my pronouns.page)

𐕣 age: 16

♇ gender: complicated and unclear so i just say i'm a dude lol

𐕣 orientation: GAY and aroacespec :3

♇ disorders:  i have AuDHD and anxiety! other little ones (not disorders, they’re like unfortunate add-ons) are low self esteem and depressive tendencies :P

𐕣 fun facts: my special interests are my OCs (character creation/design and storytelling) and the riordanverse :3 i’m a child of hades, legacy of nemesis. i’m just another wannabe prince, grim reaper, magical boy and doll 🤭 i'm half white and half black :P

♇ claimed anons: 🪤anon, 🌹anon

───────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────────

𐕣 favorite color: blue, yellow and red

♇ favorite bands: set it off, point north and pierce the veil! i also love stray kids and utsu-p :) on a similar note, my fav vocaloid is luka <3 teto is my fav utau

𐕣 favorite songs: social suicide (point north), artificial suicide (bad omens), mad (tx2 and ice nine kills)

♇ favorite anime: jujutsu kaisen, chainsaw man, RWBY, sword art online, the asterisk war

𐕣 favorite book: the entirety PJO and HoO series...

♇ favorite game: i have the most hours on SAO: fatal bullet, RWBY: grimm eclipse and hades (in that order). i also rly like arcaea and phigros (rhythm games)

───────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────────

𐕣 byi: i reblog/interact with some pretty triggering stuff, sometimes i talk abt sh and ig kinky-ish stuff? (ex. 'i want satoru gojo to choke me’ and shit along those lines :P)

♇ dni: general dni criteria (homophobic, transphobic, racist etc.), anti-xenogenders/anti-neopronouns, proshippers (srsly stay tf away from me), 27+ (26 and below is fine idrc who interacts with me most of the time), anti-recovery, pro-forced recovery (you might even disgust me more than anti, but that might just be cuz i was forced into recovery), ppl that encourage ppl to (start) sh/ed/etc, z00s (they're gross, have a problem and need therapy more than any of my non-z00 mentally ill friends. if you're a z00, get help.), transID (gods, those ppl disgust me bigtime)

𐕣 pls interact: jirai, sh, obslove

♇ boundaries: sexual jokes about/towards me are a NO, otherwise creepy messages are fine (beware 🪤anon tho), DMing me without asking is fine, spamming asks is fine as long as you're actually saying something, spam-liking is fine, stalking and general obsession is encouraged.

this blog is safe for most people!!!

(cluster a/b/c, furries, therians, age-regressors etc)

intro template used

pronouns.page

airbuds

[irritablepoe]

Headcanon for Poe's backstory and his ability

okay so i’ve been thinking about this headcanon for ranpoe for like a year now and i wanted to do a big reveal in one of my fics but it’s kinda on the writer’s block list rn and i wanted to share it here too bc obv not everyone’s gonna read my fic. 

i want to point out that these are all headcanons with barely any evidence. you don’t have to share these opinions ofc oki oki <3

mainly it’s about how there’s more to poe’s and ranpo’s relationship - and especially their rivalry - than we see at first, that much is obvious. ranpo didn’t just hurt poe’s feelings, it wouldn’t make sense for poe to be this upset about it.

so these are a few headcanons i’ve already written about and posted about on here:

first: poe was the one who organized these mysteries competitions or was already highly involved in them otherwise. he may even had investors that sponsored him to do them. he was the best detective in america until ranpo defeated him. he probably had a lot of fans that supported him and cheered him on too. it’d make sense for them to leave him when ranpo defeated him, leaving him with nothing.

second: his friends. it’s stated that he isolated after his defeat. for that to be the case he would have had to have some sort of social connection to people before that. that can be the case for fans ofc, but it could also be that he did have a friendgroup before that. maybe even other detectives or mystery solver that turned away from him OR he was too embarrassed to keep up his typical boastfulness around them after ranpo.

another aspect i want to add here is that if he had investors that then left him, it could be that he fell into poverty which in turn could’ve led to one of his loved one’s dying (maybe of illness) because he couldn’t financially support them anymore. canon poe has stated to have experience with grief and looking at irl poe it would make sense that someone in his family (if not multiple people) died from sickness.

now, these are the aspects i’ve already covered. but now i would like to add another one. most of you are certainly familiar with the theory that abilities are caused by trauma or a life-changing event. the mystery competition between ranpo and poe seemed to have been such an event to poe. so - my theory or perhaps headcanon is that poe’s ability was triggered due to ranpo defeating him. i have multiple arguments to make here:

poe’s ability is perfectly crafted to be challenging to ranpo. leaving fyodor out of this right now (while also pointing out that fyodor did have a LOT of time to think about this plan though, while poe took six years), no other ability has proven to make ranpo this upset.

in the flashback poe was clearly stated to be a detective. ofc poe’s profession changed with the guild but still, he didn’t put his writing first back then.

it would explain his ambiguous feelings towards ranpo. hating him for taking everything away from him, while also seeing him as someone who has given this gift to him which would also explain him letting ranpo use his ability without being able to say no.

let me know what you think about this, the evidence for this is obviously dragged by the hair a little bit but yk, I’M PASSIONATE ABOUT THIS, it’s literally so fun to make up their backstory even if it doesn’t turn out to be true (or will never be answered idrc). you don’t have to agree obv, that’s just my two cents to ranpoe (they are my life).

thank you for reading all this <3

[drovvninq]

ch season 2 opinions

design::

i don't like the new characters' color schemes other than frida. i think the colors work well with her and her character.

confucius' character was wasted, i wish he had more screen time with jfk other than the keyboard warriors scene, plus his bright colors make me want to scream:(

HARRIET TUBMAN'S DESIGN DRIVES ME CRAZY. i understand the whole "ohh her old design wasn't important and the only scene she had was a canceled test scene" stuff but like i wish they'd kept it. she looks like a highlighter to me and i wish they'd given her SOMETHING to make her look more like harriet, maybe the old hair design. she could be any black historical female figure and it wouldn't be surprising.

the new principal girl is fine, idrc about her that much. she isn't too out there but i also think it's really stupid they made her related to joan it just seems like a way for them to get her more screen time

*gulp* ships::

they ruined joanfk, joan didnt act anything like the sarcastic gothy teen she used to be, she was obsessed with being popular and looking cool (ex. cleocoming), and jfk only made sex jokes. no war puns, no funny magic man-esque one liners, nothing. plus he became super clingy and just not the jock he used to be. the whole reason they worked was because they felt open with each other and told each other everything, but in the reboot they hide all sorts of stuff from each other.

i hate harriet and jfk. they should've used that time to develop frida and cleo, who are

the most random ship ever. cleo gave me such homophobic vibes in the first season and to see her date another woman with NO ARC is terrible. she AT LEAST couldve had a "i can date girls?" gag. but no, nothing. it feels so cash grabby and shallow.

i have no sentimental attachment to harriet and confucius, so them dating meant nothing to me. it felt like watching two random people make out: weird, strangely random, and confusing.

it's so scudworth coded to have him in love with a woman that wants him dead.

plot::

cleo had no important points except for cleocoming where she didnt even act like herself. i assume this was to hide the fact that she got a brand new voice actor, but i think she's doing fine. the script is the issue. she's no longer manipulative. she's just mean. the old cleo would've thrown the blood pumpkin rumor right back in joan's face.

the "clone leader test" plot sucked. should've made another cloney island plotline.

booo topher i hate him

[b3achysurfer]

SBG POST!! (hxh moots please ignore this 😓)

** disclaimer: DO NOT SEND HATE TO ANYONE!!!! whether or not they agree with what I’m going to say, please don’t send hate to them. if anything I say comes off as harsh/rude, just know that’s not my intention.

deadass wasn’t gonna say anything because I genuinely don’t care, but some of my friends/supporters are getting hate and it’s starting to annoy me. also my name got dragged in so it’s free game now 😛 **

posting this on my main for reach, but my side blog for sbg is @b3achysurfur !!

Someone sent me a post that was talking about how the fandom thinks it’s okay to hate Logan for being a nerd but not anyone else for the tropes they’re based on. They also said that people have been “getting defensive about their right to hate a charater”. The person probably has me blocked and won’t see this but idrc bc they were talking about me (to some extent).

no one is getting defensive about their “right to hate a character”. from what I’ve seen (and posted) it was just people pointing out how silly it is to say “oh you can’t hate this character 😡”. that’s literally it lmao. that’s not being “defensive”, it’s just pointing out how stupid you guys sound. also, it applies to you too? you can hate/like whoever you want.

“i'd be stabbed 27 times and set on fire for saying anything remotely bad about aiden but logan gets away scot free bc he's a ‘nerd’ and ppl simply dislike him bc of his trope? the double standards are just odd, that's what i'm addressing.” Scot-free? No I didn’t “get away scot free”. I got sent death threats, sm1 attempted to dox me, my dms were full of hate, and there was post after post of people saying things about me (some of which came from people you associate yourself with op). It just looks like I “got away scot-free” because I’m not a little bitch and can deal with backlash for my opinions.

you guys created this environment where everyone has to like everything! everyone has to feel the same way about everything! and a lot of you have this mob mentality and just follow the crowd instead of having you’re own opinions. There is no “double standard”. You guys hate on anyone and everyone for their personal opinions.

“what's the difference between them and everyone else? i'm "allowed to hate" these characters, but if i posted my opinion on someone like aiden, who is a mostly beloved character by the fandom, i'd get Rattled.” Nothing! There’s no difference! Only problem is none of you have the balls to express your opinions out loud. Not that I blame you tho, from my experience the fandom is very agressive when you disagree with them. And by the way, I was never “allowed to hate” Logan. Can’t even count how many people made posts saying, “dni if you hate Logan/any of the main cast” lol. Which also confuses me op. You can’t really complain about it when you’re apart of the problem, no?

“and anyways i'm talking abt the fact that people are defending beachy for their opinions, the majority of us dislike them but it's still insane the difference” I know people hate me, idrc ab that. but the fact that you complained about not being able to dislike any of the main charaters than added that you (as well as most of sbg tumblr) don’t like me bc of my opinion is so hypocritical. Do you not hear yourself?? Also people defend me because you guys get nasty quick. most of my posts are JOKES. yes I hate Logan, but I’m not being serious when I write things about him. Not to mention most the people who defend me now were at my thoart when we first started interacting.

Having different opinions on characters and vocalizing it is very important to fandom growth. You guys need to understand this. If you force everyone is like a charater then not only does it make the fandom boring to interact with it but it also creates drama. AKA THE WHOLE “LOWAR”. SHI WOULDVE NEVER HAPPENED IF I WAS ALLOWED TO DISLIKE LOGAN LMAO??? Not to mention, it allows you to see different perspectives and versions of the same charater just through someone else’s eyes. That’s why our fanon versions of charaters are just copy and paste of the canon versions. Because you guys never give anyone space to be creative. As soon as you don’t agree with it, you all jump on the person and make it a problem. It’s annoying.

If you don’t want to be attacked for your opinions on a charater then stop attacking others for their opinions. Obviously this problem won’t be fixed immediately but it’s one person at a time yk? Just know if you hate a character, you should expect at least a bit of backlash and debate. Shi I still argue with people and it’s been like 3 months. Just remember to be open minded, respectful, and have fun!!

“Hating” on a charater doesn’t have to be negative/drama. it’s you guys that make it into that. Relax a bit and have a little more fun. Or don’t, it’s ya life 🤷‍♀️

—- btw if you ever have a problem with me, talk to me about it or stfu. Stop attacking my friends/supporters. you can dm me, tag me in a post, send me an ask, comment, reblog, idc. I’ll respond (on my sbg side blog). Or just block and ignore me. Thanks 😛

[sparklingcid3r]

Had a half-asleep idea that must be shared: an everyone-lives au but Bob is still a jerk so they Christmas Carol him into being nice. (Ponyboy got the idea from reading the book.)

i don’t usually fw fantastical au’s but i’ll hop on this rq 🙏 why stop at alt ending when u can go full fantasy. curtis brothers don’t exist irl, soda is the ghost of christmas past, pony’s the ghost of christmas present, and darry’s the ghost of christmas yet to come/future

let me cook yall just stay w me👏 but like first u gotta watch 2022’s scrooge: a christmas carol, trust🤞

idrc who they haunt. it can be bob for his impulsiveness, dally for his coldness, or johnny for his sadness, i’m more interested in the brothers so listennn

soda as the ghost of xmas past bc he’s always had a penchant for maintaining his joy from childhood. he’s high on life and never let it get away from him even as he matured. so he’ll take the individual back to their past and point out how different they used to be, how innocent. he’ll lowk guilt trip them as he goes through every hardship they’ve ever endured and says “well THAT can’t be the reason ur so bitter lol, let’s keep looking.” he mostly ends up pissing ppl off but does get them in their feels with his curiosity for figuring out what could have possibly gone awry in their lives.

pony as the ghost of xmas present bc he himself has learned to live in the moment and appreciate the beauty of life as it is without alteration. he’ll show the individual the impact that their actions have on the people around them and what they’re missing out while they’re too busy wrapped up in their own heads. sometimes he’ll stop to admire the sky as it changes color or the way street lamps reflect off the snow on the ground, or the lights around storefront windows. he’s there to get the individual to understand how delicate the world is and how noteworthy it is, from the struggling branches to the powerful sun.

darry’s the ghost of xmas future bc he has to be the most morose of them all. he’s the one who shows the individual what life for them will entail if they continue to stew in their misery. be it how few ppl will mourn them or every chance at happiness they will inevitably let pass them by. he’s pretty silent for the most part, sticking to the dramatic visuals. he’ll lead individuals to their own funerals to let them see just how badly they’re screwing up their own lives. (he’s also the one who comes to collect the individuals who were never able to change and chains them up in the afterlife. he doesn’t like it, but it’s part of the job description).

alr that’s all i got, ask me abt this again in december and maybe i’ll have more interesting thoughts lmfao 🙏

[numetaljackdog]

WILT 8/3/2024

spotify//youtube

and get this. song notes under cut

Limp Bizkit - No Sex: ahaha the funny bizkit band!!!!! except this song speaks deeply to some Themes 😐<-the seriouser. pretty sure i've talked about this one in past WILTs but it just continues to strike me as unusual to hear fred like this on significant other. it's such a shameful song, definitely with some large doses of deflection and passing the blame to the woman he's addressing in the lyrics, but it connects on a base emotional level that fred rarely operated on at this point in bizkit hiztory, and an emotional level which i operate on every day of my life. this is in my top 3 lb songs

Jerk - I Hate People Like That: whenever i'm listening to this song, it's the best song in the world. i discovered this through the "crazy-ass moments in nu metal history" instagram page and loved the live video (the singer looks so cool!!) but hearing the studio version for the first time was the real jaw-dropper. recommend the whole album, some of the crunchiest, tastiest, most australian industrial i've ever heard

Deftones - Lotion: FINALLY entering my deftones era with lots of around the fur. lotion came on shuffle whilst i was mightily zooted one day and i decided that this was, in fact, the best song ever. the little vocal riff in the chorus? wild. plus ngl i do feel sickened

Fabricoh - Arm the Left: what a cool hardcore band :)

Coal Chamber - Fiend: idrc about coal chamber that much but this shit bumps

Klokwise - Bounce With This: as i believe i mentioned, this is one of my current favorite tracks from a newer nu metal band. hype as fuck, good riff, lots of bouncing. one thing i like best about klokwise is that they have a catchphrase. fucking brilliant way to build a community around your band. people can just say WISE UP and if you're with it then you immediately know what's up

Faith No More - Jizzlobber: speaking of themes and topics. i have been getting more into fnm due to reasons beyond my control and well frankly they are so bangers. "banger" doesn't really cover this one though this is straight up freak shit those vocals are crazyyyy

Cradle Of Thorns - Flesh: before videodrone was videodrone they were a strange little diy industrial outfit that made some independently-released records throughout the 90s. i've much yet to explore from the back catalog but this is a jam that's a combination of sexy and nasty and funny. included in the youtube playlist is footage of ty what's-his-name flailing and screeching like a wet little loser faggot boy

Kendrick Lamar - Not Like Us: i followed the beef from about the midpoint to the conclusion and i'm still marveling at how thoroughly kendrick lamar put that man in the dirt. and made some bangers along the way, this shit is in my head everyday

Faith No More - Digging the Grave: the singing so good. that's all i really have for this one rn, this is the newest addition to the rotation

Boskat - Boiler: honestly rudeboy really deserves most of the credit for this, like yeah boskat came up with a catchy riff but otherwise it's like barely their song. plus i checked out some of their other shit and it's mid as hell. really good nu revival track but seems like a total fluke unforch. plus idk why they shied away from just saying "dick" like grow up

Joey Valence & Brae - Packapunch: been bumping some jvb recently, which is where some of the beastie posting has been coming from. i'm a little cynical about some of their new stuff like ohhhh yeah i bet you want to add nu jazz and breakcore and w/e to your sound yeah i bet your online-as-fuck audience eats that shit up. but then also i'm part of that audience and i kind of do. so i guess they've got me there. plus danny brown! i'm serious about the beastie girls thing btw

Blondie - Rapture: another legitimate claim for the title of first-ever rap rock song! which is crazy bc it comes out of nowhere. like wow this blondie song is good in the way that most blondie songs are g- hey wait what. i love new wave and art punk and other stuff too. plus debbie harry's voice sounds realllll sexy when she sings the song title

P. O. D. - School of Hard Knocks: from little nicky. it's nu memtal

Insane Clown Posse - Hum Drum Boogie: oh goody! anyway me + the crew have been jamming this album recently and this song is so funny. MY BALLS

Charli XCX - Guess featuring Billie Eilish: i like girls :) this track strikes me as like a modern take on the paradigm of older club hits where there's like a male rapper who's the main artist and a female singer who's featured and does the hook and through the lyrics the narrative of performance is that they're gonna fuck down on each other. this is that but instead of pitbull or whoever it's billie eilish. and well that's kind of awesome. becuase of lesbian sex

Natalie Portman - Natalie's Rap: i don't give a fuckkkk about snl but i love when women rap and i love when it's violent on purpose

Chris Korda - Save the Planet, Kill Yourself: i got obsessed with the church of euthanasia recently after reading a bunch about the unabomber and that led me to chris korda's music which admittedly is not something i would give a fuck about if not for everything else going on with her. i would have added "i like to watch" instead of this but for some strange reason that i just can't fathom it doesn't seem to be widely available anywhere. weird!

Insane Clown Posse - I'm Ugly: actually awful song but soooo fucking funny. and then it gets kind of hard at the end and i stand by that

BONUS TRACK!

Trapt - These Walls: fuck these guys and their shitty band but also this song is kind of real as fuck....... like yeah man i would trade everything for this. however this was almost certainly purely incidental as all their songs sound like they were made in a lab

[skullbowz]

pretend i dont know anything about mitch (because i actually dont and was too scared to ask in dms) and please share everything you have about that man ?!

Ohmahat gawd I’m gonna OOGLE u

Okayokayokayokayokagokag.

Starting off canonically (typing this after hand — there was barely any canon it was just us yapping)

Mitch doesn’t have much lore to him in all honesty

Just the dude that got terrorized by eyeless Jack (nawt Jack Nyras whatever the fuck La mishi mishi named their twink ass version of EJ)

But like. . . Maybe it’s just me being an EJ irl or just how much Mitchell fascinates me for no reason at all, hands down one of my favorite “background” CRP characters to a popular/mainstream one.

To sum up the eyeless Jack story told in Mitch’s point of view

—> (quote)

"I was staring face to face with a creature with a black hoodie and a dark blue mask with no nose or mouth staring down at me. The thing that scared me the most was that it had no eyes. Just empty, black sockets. The creature also had some black substance dripping from its sockets."

Actual thing —>

In the original story, a man named Mitch moves in with his brother Edwin after his house is foreclosed. A week later, Mitch wakes up with a large gash on his cheek. After going to the hospital, the doctor reveals that Mitch's left kidney had been surgically removed overnight. Around midnight that night, Mitch wakes to see Eyeless Jack over his bed, wearing a blue mask with black liquid dripping from empty eye sockets behind the mask.

Mitch manages to grab his camera and take a picture before Jack attacks, clawing at his chest. Mitch escapes and flees into the woods, where he trips and is knocked unconscious. When Mitch awakens in the hospital, it is revealed to him that Edwin had been killed the previous night. His parents drive him to the house to collect his belongings. When he enters, Mitch sees Edwin's corpse and a small object lying next to it. He observes it find that it is his kidney with a bite taken out of it, covered in a black substance.

(Copy and pasted for accuracy)

——————

There is very little media of Mitch becuz the OG (the rake-like eyeless Jack / aka the “OG”) isn’t as popular as all the remakes (the most popular being the cult-sacrificed — Slavic son of Chernobog: and WW2 eyeless Jack)

But the ones that do (or even just barely hint at his existence) I EAT THE EFF UP

(Links) —>

(This one is so silly cuz the art tbh)

(The little dude doll is supposedly Mitch. . . Also I heavily think this has Hannibal references ?!!??!!??? Maybe I’m a little too autistic)

This I ESPECIALLY love omfg

And there are probably more out there but these r just some examples

—————

I guess I really like the fact that unlike other victims of different EJ stories (or just any slasher / CRP story) Mitch isn’t a complete dumbass and he fights and flights against EJ. Whether EJ psychologically tortured Mitch (as some alternate versions go) or not idrc I still find him so silly. . . AND HE DOESNT DIE ?? WOO HOO YOU GO BITCH QUEEN !!!!!

The media of Mitch that is out there indicates the man has either blonde or black hair , blue eyes , and pale skin.

My guy is most definitely in his 20’s (assuming he is mid - late 20’s) and while not having a canonical full name (that I know of) I’ve seen multiple sources saying it’s Mitch(ell) Harlan’s / start w a H?? Idk. EJ’s story is left to be a mysterious one that is easily bended to fit anybody’s creative imaginary. That goes the same way for Mitch as well.

I ALSO SEE ALOT OF PEOPLE SAY THAT MITCH IS EYELESS JACK WHICH I FIND VERY VERY COOL

if EJ doesn’t kill its victims, or they manage to escape, they fall under a certain illness that basically mutilates their appearances. ( not canon at all plz I just wanted to mention this )

(And yes I will be using it/its for ej cuz not only do I use it/its but EJ is canonically referred to as a masculine thing, “it” and creature 😒)

There is this sooper dooped cool artist on toyhouse, and while their eyeless Jack isn’t the victim (aka Mitch) and just happened 2 have the same night I still I love their interpretation of EJ.

Uhhh that’s basically it for “canon” wise and additional information. Dudes basically as much as a mystery as eyeless Jack itself andddd yeah I still love him and I think we can do just as much to his character just liek what was done w EJ

(I probably sound insane to anything reading this:) what is bro yapping about? Mitch was just a victim—— SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH let me live in my own littol world of mitches 😞

(Also had 2 hold back on yapping about my memories w Mitch bc I’d actually drive the tumbers on here insane)

K

Kay

Kaayzie

Im done

Errr

:33

[stormyoceans]

Sorry for ranting in your ask box idk if any of this will make sense but I've been thinking if jimmysea do get a series with jojo I really hope it's them as a standalone and not an ensemble. I don't hate other gmm actors (ik ppl want a hia gang drama tbh idrc about that) but seeing the mess during only friends, I don't want jimmysea being subjected to that same discourse especially when they've been bl fandoms punching bags before *war flashbacks of vvs era*.

Not to be confused with me fearing jimmysea will be overshadowed by others or their screentime will diminish when they can definitely hold their own but just for their protection from other fandoms (and for my sanity) I just don't want them in a ensemble but knowing jojo he loves a big ol' cast so we'll see.

i completely understand you on this, anon, we've truly been in the trenches with vice versa just fighting for our life begging people to at least be respectful to jimmysea in their own damn show that i feel like the moment we hear that someone - ANYONE - is gonna be in a show with them we immediately start to have flashbacks of war like you said and PANIC

and i get that only friends didn't really help to calm our worries because those few months were ROUGH. i feel like the only reason i was able to enjoy the show in any way is because i kept my opinions to myself and avoided getting too involved with it outside from reblogging some gifsets, which is kinda the opposite of what a fandom should be imho like. if i have to refrain from actively joining a particular fandom because im afraid the experience is gonna be so negative it will actually affect my personal enjoyment of the show, then that kinda defeats the point of fandom itself. but i digress ;;;;;;;

the thing is. i feel like discourse and disputes between fans can arise regardless of how big a cast is, and while im the first one to recognize i'd rather not have jimmysea share a show with certain actors not because of the actors themselves but because of a particular category of fans of said actors, i also wouldn't want to preclude them any possibility for growth. if that makes sense ;;;;;;

in the end despite all my worries and fears and personal preferences, the most important thing to me is that they're gonna have a new show together in the future. i'd definitely rather have them be the sole focus of it, but if it's gonna be an ensemble cast with multiple pairings then i will just hope for the best and focus all my energies on supporting jimmysea

IF WE GOT WHERE WE ARE WHEN IT WAS ONLY 50 OF US AND WITH THE MOST POPULAR FANDOM AT THE TIME AGAINST JIMMYSEA THEN BY GOD WE CAN WITHSTAND EVERYTHING AND COME OUT OF IT EVEN STRONGER THAN BEFORE

[joculatrixster]

thank you for replying! -i understand where youre coming from but i feel like some of the points you brought up about scott can't just be boiled down to homophobia if that makes sense- like people see scott as calculated because he calls making allies/friendships a 'social game' etc . and obviously grian and joel berating and teasing jimmy also isn't entirely fine but i think toxicity in the context of an alliance vs a canon-explicit marriage should be weighed differently, but ultimately im not sure that grian is actually necessarily "worse" than scott; while i think grian and joel and jimmy do have an unbalanced dynamic alot of the 'berating' between them is more like 'jimmy you idiot you died to xyz' whereas with scott in 3l it felt a bit more manipulative likewhen scott purposely placed something to scare jimmy and then made fun of him for being scared but. idk

also i think everyone understands that they're friends in real life and nothing ccjimmy is actually uncomfortable with would make it into a video but this is just to think about/interpret their characters within the context of the roleplay/storyline

again this isnt meant as an attack or anything at all - i just wanted to talk about why some people would have a different interpretation of fh!

thats fair, i read ur reply when i was busy i dont remember it well but honestly a fair take ^-^b i dont think it ALL is sorry i didnt make it clear i think the reason its POPULAR is bc scott fans r not rlly the ppl doing this its jimmy fans who dominate the fandom way more, but the fact irs happening to the gay guy IS weird and something to raise a brow to especially when there r more weird extreme fans who take it wayyy too far

it feels unbalanced to me bc it is, grian and joel have more fans in the life series rlly than scott bc most scott fans r just not life series postinfg, so when grian or joel does something mean to others in a similar vien its seen less in a negative light. im going off of memory so forgive me if i get a bit fuzzy w it

scott teases jimmy their friendship is kinda rivalry type thing its rlly just how they r, but ppl r not as used to it which is understandable too. idrc if ppl think scott is a bit manipulative hes just like. vilinized for it or seen as cold when he clearly still cares for his allies? he sacrificed SO much time in lil, he let ppl kill him in secret life, i wish i saw ppl rlly speak more on those better parts of him but also its just more normalized to intpret his actions more cold than it is for say grian who could be seen as cold for how easy he sheds alliances.

every intpretation is fine but w scott it genuinely goes into character bashing territory or just making him the stand in vilian jimmy needs to be saved from in fandom spaces which is agian fine if it happened to other characters who r similarly manipulative or calculating(martyn, scar, impulse even...) but deadass ive never seen anyone but scott put in such a position. which is weird. to me. especially when framed as him being bashed or vilinized for his straight friend who ppl hc he abuses like...ok. but where is the same energy for scar who is deadass evil af in 3rd life and limited life..? scar who destroys the ranch and kills his mother and doesnt apologize for either??? is it bc ppl just like him more so it makes more sense wven he does manipulative stuff??? martyn who is notoriously devisive for his ending and playstyle but in fics like its not great but he tends to not be as hated or put in the same level of bashing pll do for scott? hes prob the closest ive seen to the way scott is seen as an easy stand in vilian but i have not seen it as bad for him?

tho anon no not everyone understands there is a group of ppl who genuinely think scott in real life is an abusive person and actually that inspired my original post bc pll said w their whole chest they think scott is bad and makes jimmy uncomfortable

sorry if this is jumbled the other anon message is turning me into the joker...i get what u mean and i DO think its naunced but ppl REFUSE to acknowledge how weird it can feel for others to see and while i do think there r other factors...this fandom has leaned into homophobia for scott especially more frindge jimmy fans, sorry i think i mixed up a lot of things in my replys i was busy and also i genuinely dont care enough about tumblr anon posting to explain every naunce of an issue ie why i put pearl as a tag on bc the mysongy of all that is not for today thank u ^-^b

[doctorofmagic]

I know this wasn't the point of the Wanda post but I feel like this should be said: Introducing things from the movies into the comics is not always a bad thing like how Blade wasn't half vampire until after the film trilogy and everything that happened with comic 616 Nick Fury. But I could be wrong and those are actually terrible examples.

I agree with you! I don't think adaptations and new concepts are bad, but it really depends on every circumstance.

Cloud!Galactus will forever haunt the second FF movie. Let alone that *points at Victor von Doom as a whole*

On the other hand, some concepts are super welcome, like what they did with the Eternals, making most of their personalities waaaay more interesting (I suppose my only exception is Sersi. Comics!Sersi is/was so full of sass and I missed that. But Ikaris? Makkari? Druig? *chef's kiss*)

Nick Fury, imo, is a very unique concept because he only exists thanks to the Ultimates artist who used Samuel L. Jackson for his design. The actor saw that and wanted to be part of the MCU, which turned him into a very popular character, leading Ult!Fury to the 616, while 616!Fury is currently *whatever happened to him in Slott's FF run idrc* (correct me if I'm wrong on this, I read that info a long time ago)

Oh, and I can't say much about Blade because I'm just starting to read his chronology. But I think it's cool that he's a daywalker, as far as I know.

In short, it's okay if the movies introduce something cool to the character.

But back to Wanda... (and I know you didn't mention her, this is just me ranting, so please feel free to ignore that part, I'm just seizing this opportunity)

Nothing about her MCU characterization added good things to her comic book version. She was whitewashed, worked for Hydra, had a terrible storyline about grief and mental health (tipically stereotyped and twice as problematic since she's a woman) and finally had the "woman goes crazy with power" trope. She was never able to control her powers (as seen in Civil War) and let her emotions warp reality to fit her fantasies while being manipulated by both people and her own emotions (again, women are often called overly emotional, and I'm not excusing Bendis here because he did the same in comics). She became a villain during HoM and the times she was possessed by Chthon, but she was never meant to be *THAT* scary and evil. There's altruism in her essence (this is why the narrative of killing a teenager is just so off to me).

Wanda is a brown romani woman who was often persecuted due to her ethnicity, religion and skin color, as well as her mutant genes. And yes, the many reboots that tried to erase her identity. Even in modern day, she still has to deal with ill-intended writers who ignored the implications of her character as a hero of color and the double effort she has to perform in order to be accepted as an Avenger, (former) mutant and overall hero. Not only that, the fans have to BEG to artists to make sure she isn't whitewashed, while 0ls3n stans will mock and diminish those who ask for representation.

This is why it's so problematic for Wanda to be like that. Her entire characterization is made to please a toxic fanbase and use her as a symbol to promote their racism (as seen on my previous post).

In short, they don't like Wanda. They just idolize 0ls3n because she's white and plays a derranged woman filled with power. And that's kinda enough for them.

Don't get me wrong, I do love my fair share of female villains (I'm literally in 300 different fandoms). But Wanda was not meant to be that, especially knowing that there are so few female heroes of color on screen (it gets even worse when we only count phase 1, 2 and 3).

In any case, my point is, fans cannot accept the influence of MCU!Wanda to be translated to comics because it's erasure of her identity and plain racism. The new team is working very hard to portray a woman of color as she was supposed to be ever since her roma heritage was established in comics, and it's infuriating that people will turn a blind eye to all that.

Like, this kind of shit keeps happening over and over.

Even when Wanda is a brown woman like she's supposed to be, they still find a way to erase her through 0ls3n's whiteness. This is not different from those derranged people who pick white actors and photoshop them over Black Panther's characters (I've seen one just yesterday).

Sure many minorities were poorly portrayed back then, often depicting problematic characterizations, but here's an excellent case of how comic books allow room for growth (I was talking about HP and JK but it also fits this post)

Agatha was just the last bit of bad influence from that accursed TV show. She was deaged, which is absurdly ageist. There are so many few elderly and middle-aged women in the Marvel universe. There's less now because women can't be old (ask me about the anons that stated Charlize was too old to play Clea and watch me burn in rage).

Anyways, I wanted to make this about Wanda again because it's not just a case of bad adaptation. It's a political statement -- and a bad one. And I don't want ANY OF THAT in a media that is so political and means so much to minorities. I feel like it's important for us to talk about this ALWAYS. So yeah. I don't know how to end this post. Representation matters. Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[localthumbcache]

Hi it’s me again! Honestly that’s cool I thought it may have been omegaverse related but in case it wasn’t I didn’t want to embarrass myself. 😭 I blame wattpad and the fact like I really liked werewolves. 😔

Anyways! Definitely if you do post anything related to your characters I would be happy to read! They’re really stunning!

Also I was curious how you gain inspiration for your characters. I know you mentioned you put parts of yourself into their stories and/or them, but are there usually any other factors that help you figure out how they may look or who they’re personalities will be? Whether it’s a songs, lyric(s), animals, aesthetics, shows/movies, or anything.

Hey hey anon!! ᵔદᵔ

Loll tbh I kinda judged the omegaverse at first until I watched coleydoesthings video on it. She gives a very good explanation and it even got me interested soo here we are! I was a tiny bit hesitant on sharing the smut here bc "cringe" but idrc!! (This is tumblr lol we're all weirdos)

And tysm!! 🩷 I'm glad to hear that 🥺 I might work some more on the doc since I'm pretty much gonna be in bed all day 😭 probably won't get to release it today but hopefully I'll be halfway done or smth

Also, since I don't actually play the game a lot (I've even removed some gameplay mods) I've been thinking about making short stories until maybe one day when I actually want to work on a full series - once i get the lore and all that jazz locked down that is. For now they'd just be little scenarios and things that happen in their lives ᵔદᵔ I don't rlly like the gameplay so might as well use the sims as a creative medium lol

I get most of my inspo off of pinterest and sometimes other people's sims! I have a simspo board which has faces, character concepts, and even style inspiration. I also have moodboards dedicated to them, which helps me put together their overall vibe. Music is kind of a factor too, although I associate a sim with a song I already know instead of making sims based off of it. Some sims I've based off of people I know irl

I also want to work on a mini music project as well as a voice canon one :> ohh and an incorrect quotes one too! Just a silly way to understand their characters a bit better :3

I take inspo for world building as well! I'm really focusing on vampires rn. I took some inspiration from dracula, the vampyre, interview with a vampire, and various yt videos on vampire lore/history. This video explains the biology of vampires (he even scientifically explains how crosses are harmful to them!!), and this one explains their history.

For example: before the pretty, well put-together person that we envision when we think of vampires, vampires before that were depicted as more animalistic than anything. So why not have the best of both worlds!! When in human form, my vampires have very little vampiric qualities (ex. Keith's eyes have a red glint to them, the vatores ears are slightly pointed, and all of them have larger canines than the average human), they're able to show up on camera and have reflections, and crosses are only harmful to them if they're blessed. When they turn into their dark form (or "true form" as hunters call it), however, they do not have a reflection, they cannot be caught on camera, and like the old vampires, they appear monstrous.

[sxtaep]

You only got horny once? That means that you're purer and better than most of us here 😭😭😭😭😭😭. What did tht guy do to ruin you? 👀

THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING BUT WE’RE GONNA TALK ABOUT IT BECAUSE WE NEED SOME TMI AROUND HERE 😭😭😭

it’s probably nothing serious and petty to some of you BUT THIS FUCKED ME UP DIFFERENTLY 😭

get ready for a long, boring story time guys

tw: jahanara being fucking stupid

ok i’ve mentioned this guy before, but let’s call him X for this storyline 😭

so, me and X have known each other since we were 11, we went to the same secondary school and ended up going to the same college. we weren’t close in secondary school, he was just a classmate and a mutual friend and that was it really.

going round to september 2020 when college started, that’s when we found out that we went to the same college and a lot of our mutual friends also joined us there so that’s when we started getting close along with our other friends.

it all started with a game of among us and then a server on discord where we used to play and talk everyday 😭 it was really fun and i guess that stemmed my liking towards him?

he was so nice and funny and he’d always be nicer to me compared to everyone else in our friend group and that just threw me totally off-guard.

in college when we’d meet up before/after our classes, we’d be with the rest of our friends just chilling and stuff or we’d be walking home together talking about the most random things (mostly aot).

now now, everyone in our friend group knew that i used to write smut and ffs and stuff so they’d always tease me about it, but he in particular would ask me questions like “how do you come up with this stuff?” “are you even into any of the things you write?” and i’m guessing he used that against me later on, you’ll see.

i think around December 2020 was when i became absolutely certain that i had a crush on him and IT WAS KILLING MEEE and it was the night of my birthday, i was talking to my close friends and i told them i was gonna confess just to get it off my chest and they were very onboard and supportive about it, so i messaged him.

surprisingly, he was very nice and normal about it which was weird because he’s the most unemotional person in the world 😭 but yeah, he said he appreciates it but he wasn’t looking for a relationship or anything and he’s more focused on his studies and i reassured him like “oh, i’m not looking for a relationship either, i’m just telling you to get it out of the way.”

like genuinely, i didn’t want a relationship, YOU GUYS KNOW ME 💀😭 but yeah, and he goes “you deserve someone a lot better than me anyway,” which made me go ??? wow really?

we ended the conversation on a good note and basically got on with our lives as normal.

two weeks go by and suddenly he’s being so distant towards me?? he was actively speaking on the groupchats we were in and taking to other people but whenever i tried to speak to him ON THE GROUP CHAT, he’d just ignore me and i was thinking ????? ok then, what did i do to him?

it got quite bad to the point where he’d just be openly rude to me and making unsolicited jokes towards me (and other people) so we were all like what the hell???

he also VERY SPECIFICALLY SAID “jahanara is not funny” which tbh idrc about bc a lot of my irls say i’m the least funniest in the group 😭 but my mates were still there to defend me like their lives depend on it (love them fr 😭) and then he goes again, “jahanara is not funny. at all.” IM LIKE DAMN DUDE WHAT DID I DO TO YOU?

of course i ignored it and didn’t say anything because i HATE confrontation so i just left it.

X was close with my friend L, so she asked him why he was being so rude and distant to me and he goes “i didn’t want jahanara liking me because i knew she would end up hurt, so i made it seem like i’m a dickhead,” AND HE THOUGHT IT WAS SUCH A GOOD IDEA 💀💀💀 it was not.

around february 2021, i was getting very very excited for the grammys because i thought bts would win and so i put a poll on my snapchat story that said ‘if bts win a grammy, i will _____’

that gained a lot of traction and people were sending crazy suggestions and one of my close friends was like “you should masturbate” AND I WAS LIKE GIRL???? ARE YOU FR???

and she was dead serious SO AS A JOKE, i added that onto the poll and everyone voted for that option because everyone saw me as the overtly horny virgin for bts that has never touched herself before because she’s scared 😭😭

i think a day before the grammys, everyone on the groupchat was talking about it, even the non-armys in our friend group were so invested in me doing this if bts won 😭 and they were all giving me tips and stuff and suddenly X goes “message me when you do it.”

i didn’t think much of it because my best friend also told me to message her when i do it which was so embarrassing 💀😭

so the grammys start, it’s about 2am march 15th 2020, and i’m sitting there waiting for them to announce who on, and of course, bts lost. i was bummed that they didn’t win but i thought fuck it, let me just do it once and get it over with because im an adult, how have i not done it before?

i send a snap of myself with a thumbs up to my best friend and X and i was like “wish me luck guys” and i was shitting bricks 😭

obviously i didn’t know what to do or how to start, but X responded to my snap straight away and he asked me if i knew what to do and i said no 💀 and i guess he kind of… got me started????

this is so embarrassing but he did actually help me get in the mood, he texted me a bit, yk just telling me how to get started AND I DONT KNOW WHAT CAME OVER MY HEAD BUT I SENT HIM NUDES 😭😭😭😭 LIKE NOT FULL ON FRONTAL NUDES, JUST LIKE…. A TITTY PIC OR TWO. OR THREE (bare in mind, i genuinely thought he was helping me because he liked me back 3 months after i confessed).

like seriously, idk what possessed me to send him nudes, i think i was very h word and gripped onto the fact that he may have actually had feelings for me 😭

he screenshot all of them and he was feeding me with so many compliments and praise and yk pulling the whole “pretty girl” “good girl” thing and that really got me going 😭

OH AND THEN HE PHONED MEEEE AND HE GUIDING ME THROUGH THE PHONEEEE AND THAT DID IT FOR ME that was the first time i actually felt very GENUINELY turned on, LIKE I WAS ON THE BATHROOM FLOOR, THIGHS LITERALLY SHAKINGGGGG AND THROBBING AND I WAS SHOCKED BECAUSE IS THIS HOW ITS SUPPOSED TO FEEL??????

he was also… getting off too, i heard it all so that also blinded me into thinking he had feelings for me too 💀💀💀

he was doing the whole “if i was with you rn, i’d treat you so good” blah blah blah yk? the usual stuff, and i’m pretty sure we were at it for a good 40 minutes before wrapping up because i genuinely couldn’t finish and i hear a lot of women don’t finish often so i figured it was normal.

we said goodnight to each other and ended the call and the next day he sends a message on the groupchat and he goes “how was it, jahanara?” and i didn’t know what to say so i just went “yep, good. very good.” like we were playing this 'lets keep this between ourselves'.

i fully thought he liked me back after that night 😭 bro i was so blind 💀

i ended up telling my best friend because she has no other friends fr she’s my ride or die, so i just told her and the keeping it a secret thing didn’t last because one of X’s friends messaged me asking about it and i was like ….. how do you know?

turned out, X told his friend about it WHICH IMMEDIATELY GOT ME THINKING, OH NO WHAT IF HE SHOWED THE PICS I SENT??? so i messaged him asking him to delete them and he did, with proof, thank god .

everyone ended up finding out about what happened that night so everytime it was mentioned, it was just so awkward between us.

this all happened during the december-march 2021 lockdown we had and the lockdown ended on the 17th so i saw him that day it was so awkward being around him after that, i just knew things would never be the same.

i’d say around may, he started gaining an interest in one of my friends (a very close online friend) let’s call her D after i posted a photo of her on my story.

he kept asking questions about whether she had a boyfriend and stuff and me being me, completely impartial, i told him no, she doesn’t have a boyfriend, and then he wanted to add her on snap so i gave it to him.

i checked in with my friend D and she said she was fine being added by him and she had absolutely no interest in him the way he did AND she knew i liked him so she was never going to pursue anything anyway.

she added him back and X was trying to flirt with her and D thought it was the most embarrassing thing ever trying so hard to win her over.

he spent a good couple weeks chatting her up and begging for photos (nudes, duh) and she didn’t give them so he kind stopped with all the messages.

i knew everything because D was telling me what he was doing and i thought… God wtf? is this who i really like?

a lot of our friends found out about it and confronted him going “why would you go after jahanara’s friend begging for nudes when you know she still likes you?” and he got so much shit for it he took it out on me, again, being rude and making insensitive comments about everything and from there everything just fizzled.

i removed him everywhere, snapchat, instagram, his number, discord etc etc and he did the same apparently i couldn’t care less.

he became this guy that was so hard to talk to without getting attacked for no reason and he started spewing all this shit about what happened on grammys night, and just talking so much bs but me being me, i didn’t say anything about it or confront him about it so i just left it and let everyone else say what they wanted.

throughout 2021/22 everything died down, the groupchat became less active, people were talking a lot less, X was still bitching around me and being rude but whatever. everyone started uni so the groupchat actually died out so now interactions are very scarce.

this whole story pretty much stemmed my dislike towards males and relationships and sexual encounters. i haven’t even ATTEMPTED to be intimiate with myself since march 2020 because i’m always gonna be reminded of him and what he did, telling all his mates about it and what-not.

can’t even bring myself to wear the same pyjamas i wore that night because it makes me feel icky ☹️

but ye, that’s the story in balamory 😁 hope you guys enjoyed 😁👍

bared my titties for someone that wasn’t bangtan, i can’t believe it

[astrangergivingthestrangewelcome]

As Much As Is Realistically Possible We Should Avoid Getting Our Panties in a Twist Over Being Faithful To The Canon: Me Giving Dracula Opinions Alongside a Good Does Of Generic Fandom Philosophy Because I'm A Procrastinating Idiot Who Likes To Hear The Sound Of My Own Voice

Don't get me wrong I fucking hate when what I personally love about the canon is ruined in adaptations. Still waiting on any adaptation to actually give me a post-castle Jonathan which is in any way as interesting as he is in the book. But also, the nature of fandom and fanfiction and fanon and all that is we all engage with a story, are drawn to some aspect of the canon which resonates with us, and then typically use this as a jumping off point to explore things that the text doesn't. This is true for pretty much everyone out here draculablogging.

For example, there is in my opinion absolutely no evidence that Lucy Mina and Jonathan were a trio of childhood friends. Lucy's family does not seem to have property in Exeter and Jonathan literally never thinks about Lucy on his own. It seems obvious to me that Mina and Lucy met at boarding school. I'm quite happy to keep this element of canon in my fics because it makes sense to me. Conversely I do like to dabble in Van Helsing: Vampire Slayer, and that is expressly not canon. But idrc because it's more fun and interesting to me to have it that way. People who want to see Lucy, Jonathan, Mina childhood best friend trio bc they think it's cute are just as valid, even though I don't particularly care one way or the other. It's kinda silly to be like *eye roll* well this is fanon not canon when I guarantee you if you really look at your own preferences you're doing it too, and who really cares? People just like different things. Plus the whole point of fandom is you can go places where the canon didn't like if you write in a best friend trio then you get to explore why Lucy and Jonathan apparently grew apart. If you write an occult background for Van Helsing you get to maybe color in some of his odd edges. That's cool and good who cares if it's not strictly accurate as long as you don't pretend you're being canon compliant.

Now, those two examples are pretty innocuous, but bc this novel gets pretty heavy at times, naturally the Discourse amps up when things amp up. For example, I really like to write Mina having a lot of rage. I like her to want to rip Dracula limb from limb (granted my fics always have her role-swapped with Jonathan in the books). I am well aware that this is not in her book character at all, who consistently pities Dracula and counsels against vengeance. Personally, I just think vengeful Mina is more fun, and it's also true that I don't appreciate how Bram Stoker is like "yes perfect christian woman. perfect. all mercy. so pitying." I don't think it's quite realistic to what her feelings would be to a man who assaulted her and I also think she should get to be waaaayyy more angry about the way Dracula abused the two people she loved in all the world. I like feminine rage and I think Mina should have some and so I write her as having some. But I also get that plenty of people don't really vibe with righteous anger and like Mina's whole mercy bit and find it really really compelling, and sure plenty of victims of assault in the real world are not preoccupied with revenge. And that's such a valid take and fics that run with it are more reflective of Mina's book characterization than mine. And once again both are good. Neither side needs to be going "well MY changes are inherently more feminist than yours" to justify our preferences, it's just what we like, we can just like it, and if there is a feminist slant to what we think/write/draw it does not mean the other take is anti-feminist.

This is also why, in my opinion, it's truly not that deep if people want to ship their little harkula dracumina dark romance ships. Like full disclosure I think some of the most fucked up harkula stuff can be hot, but I have 0 interest in reading the stories that really focus on Dracula embodying the repressed desires of either Jonathan or Mina. I do absolutely exclusively read the stuff where Dracula is an unsympathetic abusive monster, and I want to read stories that use that as the anchor for horror, and I want to read stories that have Jonathan and Mina overcoming that abuse.

Now That Doesn't Mean I think the people who want to do the whole twisted love stockholm syndrome thing are bad or shouldn't do it. They are clearly just coming to the text from a completely different place than I am. It's not like I would disagree that at the very beginning before the torture began Jonathan was kinda attracted to Dracula in the Victorian queer horror way. If people want to do the whole reincarnated wife thing with Mina bc idk they really like the Coppola film or whatever, sure. I will not read that, but I'm not going to invent reasons why they're Bad Dracula Fans. It doesn't matter if it's not canon, so long as you don't say it's canon (why did you name it Bram Stoker's Dracula Francis it's not Bram Stoker's Dracula you did not adapt ANY of the characters faithful why are you lying)

Anyway I know I'm not really saying anything new, and mostly the Dracula fandom has been fine but I have seen a few takes out there acting like canon is a trump card that it truly isn't, and i've also definitely seen people get up on the moral high horse on like, depictions and portrayals of abuse etc. and although fandom can be a wonderful space to tell important, compelling stories about heavy topics, when people don't want to do that, they're not less moral than you. Lots of the time they're trying to tell important, compelling stories about heavy topics of a different sort, and sometimes they're writing porn. This is normal fandom stuff.