#most of my life I dedicated myself to a team of 6

[pkmn-smashorpass]

Unofficial poll of if Bidoof was the HM pokemon for everyone? There have been many an HM pokemon, but bidoof stands out to me since it could learn surf (or at least Bibarel could).

[alluringnectar]

my baby

pairings; loser!ellie williams x cheerleader! reader

cw; interalized homophobia, angst, tribbing, fingering (r! recieving), fluff, bullying (kinda), making out, slur, petnames like “baby & princess” , not proof read yet!

wc; 17k

life has never been better, you were handed the world at the age of 6. you never had to worry about having no friends, or not having the latest designer bag, and certainly not having everybody wrapped around your finger. you were a cheerleader & from that only, everyone respected you. you dedicated yourself into looks: always on diets, hitting the gyms, getting your nails done, having the most expensive makeup and so much more. you were the most outgoing girl known to mankind, never missing a rager or party. your friend groups were mainly other cheerleaders, and the jocks on the football team. they were assholes, but you didn’t care because so were you.

you never once paid attention in class, especially english. clicking your pen and having your eyes everywhere but the board. you snap out of your daze when your teacher announces that there will be a partner project, and she would assign the groups. you hear your name, and you pray that you get one of your friends but instead you hear the name ellie williams.

“you cannot be fucking serious” you mutter under your breath, looking at ellie whose a row infront of you.

“what was that?” the teacher asked you. “nothing.” you mock her tone, earning a laugh from your classmates.

“alright then everybody get to your partners we don’t have all day!” she claps her hands, urging everyone to switch their seats.

you stay in your seat, motioning ellie to

come where you are. why would you have to move? ellie rolled her eyes, not having the best impression of you either. “look,” ellie says “i wouldn’t have picked you either.” you scoff, “great to know we’re on the same page!” you look at her green eyes, and the way she flutters her eyelash. you were about to say something until you felt a tap on your shoulder.

it was a jock, and you end up talking to him for the rest of the period, not caring to look back at ellie, who was doing all the work. “another prissy bitch.” ellie thinks to herself.

as soon as the bell rings, ellie packs her stuff and leaves as soon as she could. she sees her friends, dina and jesse, and she sighs in relief. “you would not believe who i got paired up with.” dina and jesse both furrow their brows in unison. “a CHEERLEADER! i swear this world is against me, i already know im gonna have to do this project with myself.” dina replies, “yikes , you have it unlucky. i would NOT wanna be you.” jesse laughs and that makes ellie roll her eyes & reply “thanks dina that makes me feel a million times better.” “well jesse and I have to get going, good luck with her!” dina yells while grabbing jesse by the hand and dragging him through the hallways. ellie sighs and puts her back against the locker.

you put your bag down, and flop down on your bed chewing on some protein bars after practice. you grab your laptop and check your grade book. and thats when you see it. you’re gonna fail english class. “shit shit shit!” you tell yourself, pacing around your room in circles. you couldn’t give to shits if you were failing english, but what you did care about is being on academic probation. if you’re put on academic probation, you won’t be able to cheer. you can’t let that happen. so you grabbed your phone, and started texting everyone for ellie’s number. when you finally receive a message with her number, you smile and immediately text her.

“heyyy”

“who is this?”

“your partner in english.”

“why are you texting me?”

“do you wanna come over tomorrow to work on it?”

“is this a joke?”

“ why would i be? i have practice, so is 7:30 good?”

“yeah, ill be there just give me the address.”

it’s the next day and you come from practice drenched in sweat. you go into the shower, making sure its cold so you can relax. as you get out, you put on a robe and some uggs slipper and you hear the bell ring.

you walk over to answer, the fact ellie was supposed to come over completely slipped your mind. you open the door, and you see ellie.

“shit! is it 7:30 already?”

ellie takes full notice you’re in nothing but a robe and she blushes.

“yeah.”

“fuck im so sorry- practice had me exhausted-“

ellie reassures you, telling you it was okay because she found it kinda cute that your hair was wet and your lips were plump.

“here ellie, you can come inside, just stay in my room, i’ll get changed and i’ll be there in a sec.

ellie nods, and sinks down into your bed. she takes a moment to take in everything in your room. she took note of the way your walls were stripped pink and white to the little ballerina jewelry box that looked antique.

you walk into your room handing her some snacks. “do you want some?” “sure.”

ellie says. & now shes starting to think you’re not a total bitch.

this time, you ended up getting no work done but for a different reason. you spent your time gossiping to ellie, about who slept with who, or who did what. you never realized how pretty ellie truly was. her freckles decorated her face like how constellations decorate the sky. you look down into her lips, and ellie stops talking about whatever she was. ellie and you spend a brief moment just gazing into each other’s eyes.

you both get flustered and she breaks the silence by saying “um- do you have a hair tie?” “yeah of course here” and you hand her one.

you look at the time and gasp, it’s almost 11:30. were you guys really talking for that long? “ellie, do you wanna sleep over? or i can walk yo-“ “no, ill sleep over it’s fine.” you nod. grabbing blankets for her, “you can sleep on my bed i’ll sleep on my couch.” ellie scoffs “no fucking way, i’m not taking your bed, i can have the couch.”

and due to both of your guys’ stubbornness, you are laying next to eachother, in the same bed staring at the ceiling. you look over and you see ellie has fallen asleep. she looked so beautiful and her front hair pieces fell on her face, capturing her beautiful. you move your hand to tuck it but then you get this wave of disgust. not to her, but to yourself.

what the fuck am i doing? I can’t like girls. am i stupid? i’m not gonna be seen as some dyke on the cheerleader team. my reputation would be ruined.

you ended up falling asleep teary eyed, scared to accept if these feelings are really true and maybe they’ll go away.

it’s almost summer, and the feelings are still lingering and infact they are stronger than before. after acing the project, you still

continued to hang out with ellie. you and her hung out every friday, and it became a ritual. you were starting to fall in love with her, and you knew there was no way out. everytime your asshole friends said anything about her that was negative, you jumped to defend her name like a knight. “you know the project deadline was months ago, while do you still hangout with her.” slightly irritated you snap, “she isn’t even bad once you get to know her, she’s funny and sweet.”

it wasn’t any different for ellie either, expect she was 100% convinced you were straight. you never once spoke of your sexuality to her, and for any matter guys in general but why would you like her? she grew up playing with worms, while you grew up going on constant vacations. but even though she thought it would never happen, she asked the universe for this one thing. she prayed to a lord she didn’t even believe in, hoping he will for once listen to her.

God works in mysterious ways because you’re sitting in ellie’s room drinking vodka blasting music. it’s odd how vodka can make somebody so honest. ellie was rambling about a story with an ex she had named cat, and drama between the two. she developed a habit of gossiping, probably from you. to make sure you’re still listening, she asks you. “how about you, any boy trouble?” its silent, and you look at her and start sobbing. ellie’s heart drops down to her stomach and instantly grabs you, pulling you close to her. “hey was it something i said? im sorry-“ “no!” you manage to yell out between your broken sobs. “i don’t think i like guys.” “what?” ellie says, shocked from what she heard.

“when i look at you, it’s not the same for any guy. sure i’ve made out with guys, but not even that gives me the same feeling of when im talking to you. i want it to be you so bad, ellie.” you hiccup, tears staining your eyes. “but this is all new for me, and i hate myself for being this way, i had everything anyone could ask for and it feels like im throwing it all away.”

ellie’s mind is going in all directions, the fact you like her. the fact shes finally getting her prayers answered. she pushes it to the side, because what you need is comfort. ellie holds you tight. so tight, you cannot wiggle out of her grasp. “hey baby, it all works out at the end, your existence isn’t a sin, people who truly love you, will accept you for who you are. and you don’t have to figure things out right now, take your time.” ellie replies, hovering her hand over your face to wipe your tears.

you’re looking up at her, inching your face closer to hers. she leans in, capturing your lips in a kiss. you’re eager for more, so you grab her hair from behind and sloppily slid your mouth inside. ellie pulls away from the kiss, to get air, saliva connecting you guys to each other.

“hey els?” you say softly, having your knees tucked in.

“yeah?”

“since school is ending, there’s gonna be a rager. do you wanna come?”

ellie smiles at you, accepting your offer.

“i’ll be there.”

it’s the day of the rager, and ellie’s at her house with dina and jesse on her bed. “are you sure you really wannq go?” dina asks. ellie’s throwing her clothes everywhere, looking for an outfit to wear. “yeah,” jesse adds on “she doesn’t look like somebody who would hang out with you, what if this is all a prank?” ellie stops to look at them. “guys, i know you’re concerned but trust me on this, okay?” they nod their heads. “whatever happens, you can always tell us okay? whatever you choose to do , we’re with you.” ellie smiles and pulls them into a group hug. she’s wearing a wife pleaser, red flannel, and some jeans. shes tying her converse, she walks out the door, saying “wish me luck!”

she arrives at the house, and the music is so loud she can hear it from where she’s at. nervously she turns to twist the door knob and instantly she goes looking for you. she’s happy today after what happen yesterday, and she’s thinking to herself nothing can change her mood. until she saw you. you had a red solo cup in your hand. you were with a jock, who made it pretty clear he wanted you. was ellie a joke? was everything you said to her nothing after all? her friends were right. clenched fists, she turns to head out of the party, rushing to her car trying not to cry.

the jock wouldn’t take no for an answer, you’ve made it clear you’re not interested in him. “don’t be like that, i see the way you look at me.” you scrunch up your nose in disgust. “well you must be fucking blind.” and thats when you see in the corner of your eye, ellie. “fuck!” you murmur to yourself. ellie is already going towards the exist. as she’s walking down the steps of the porch. you scream, “wait! it’s not what it looks like, i swear-“

“do you think im a fucking joke? you made me feel like a fool.”

“ellie i swear nothing happened i was-“

“were you telling him your pranked worked? were you laughing about me? it’s done. i hope you had your fun.”

ellie is about to turn your back on you.

“ellie im in love with you!” you yell. loud enough

that people from the outside were looking at what was happening.

ellie looks around, “you’re drunk.”

“yes im drunk but that doesn’t change the fact im in love with you. the man that was talking to me. i was telling him to leave me alone. i only have eyes for you ellie! anybody who knows me has to get to know you first!” you breath starts to hitch, knowing you’re about to cry and how people are listening but you no longer care.

“i use to cry, praying that God took these feelings away. now im praying to God for letting me meet you. God knew I needed you Ellie.”

ellie stands there in disbelief, she doesn’t know what to say but her heart is about to explode. she runs to you, takes your hand and takes sits you in the passenger seat. closing the door, she starts the car and starts driving. she looks over at you, and you’re already staring at her. she places a hand on your thigh, and caresses it. “you’re perfect in every way, ways im not. i couldn’t believe somebody as amazing as you would want me, and im sorry.”

you smile, and place your hand on top of hers, “it’s okay, we were both pretty caught up” you giggle.

she would fight the world to hear that giggle again.

she pulls up to your driveway, and shes about to drive off but you ask her to stay the night. and how could she say no to that pretty face of yours?

it’s all dark, but you hold her hand and she follows you into your room. you play some music on your record player.

“do you like mazzy star els?”

“i dont listen to her much, but her voice is pretty.”

you walk up to her, and hold her by the waist. ellie looks down at you and pressed her lips onto yours. you close your eyes, melting into the kiss. you start getting hungrier for more, and you open your mouth to let her tongue slip into yours. the kisses start getting needier, and she walks you until your laying back on your bed. you straddle her waist, and she puts a hand up your dress causing you to whine.

“you’re okay with this right?”

“of course els, please hurry.”

“please what?”

you look away from her gaze, shyly, you fiddle with the seams of ellies wife pleaser and whisper to her , “please touch me, it can only be you.” and with that, ellie is slipping your dress off. kissing your collarbone all the way down to the welts of your breast. she takes off your matching set of panties and bra. and her cold hands on pinching your nipples make your back arch into her touch. she sucks on your nipples, flicking her tongue on it back and forth earning whimpers from you each and every time.

“n-need you els..” you stutter. “im not going anywhere baby.” she chuckles, her breath on your beast making you close your eyes in pleasure. “im gonna touch you now okay? tell me when to stop.” she slides her fingers between your folds.

“already so wet for me princess” and as she hovers to your face to kiss you, her front pieces of her hair are touching your own face. you’re sloppily making out with her, moaning into her mouth.

then she puts two of her fingers in, feeling you instantly clench around them. you start moaning louder and louder “ellie! ellie faster!” and she listens to you, curling her fingers even faster before hitting you in the g spot. your thighs start shaking. and your grabbing onto ellie’s fore arm, clawing it for any way to feel relief.

your moans reach an all time high and you know you’re almost there. im- im about to cum els!” and she starts sucking on your neck, “let it out for me baby, you deserve it come on.” and you reach your climax, sweating and panting. she takes her fingers out of you and sucks them. “you taste so good, everything about you is so sweet.”

still fucked out, you murmured incoherent sentences. “i wanna feel you against me els, please, please.” and ellie looks at you, grabbing your waist to pull you up. you looked at her in this love dovey expression and her heart skips a beat. “can i take this off?” you ask and she gulps and nods. you take off her flannel. then wife pleaser. then her jeans. leaving her in underwear and her sports bra, which now you’re taking off her underwear.

as for the most part both of you are naked, you place your cunt onto hers. you grind against her lightly. both of you whimpering sweet nothings. “i love you els i love you i love you” as you both of you are sweating, holding onto eachother, kissing as you slide on her and feel both of your holes clenching around nothing. “you’re doing so good f’ me” ellie blabbers. both of you are starting to reach your orgasms as you both moan in a higher octave, clawing at each others back, and feeling yourself twitch.

“i think im gonna cum i think-“ “come with me, be a good girl for me please.” she tells you needly, but you can’t even tease her because you want this just as much, if not more. both of you reach your climax, beads of sweat running down each of your fore heads. you disconnect yourself from her cunt. both of your arousals sticking to each other in a way your bodies seem like they’re made to mold into each other’s.

you collapse onto the back of your bed. ellie crawls to lay on your chest. kissing you over and over again, as a way to praise you. you giggle and run your hands through her hair, massaging her scalp.

“shouldn’t we clean up ellie?” you inquire, and you feel her breath on you again as she says “i wanna stay like this.” you nod and you bring blankets over you guys.

“im in love with you too.” ellie tells you.

“i think you showed me already.” you laughed.

“so are we girlfriends?” ellie asks you, looking up at you.

you kiss ellie, and tell her “if you go to every one of my practices.”

safe to say there was never a practice ellie didn’t go to.

[valkyrie1435atla]

If This is a Dream, Don't Wake Me - MASTERPOST

Welcome to my blog dedicated to my Avatar: The Last Airbender fan comic. This is the masterpost with links to every part in chronological order, and the link to the spotify playlist of songs I've used in the video version of the comic. It will be updated with every new part I release.

-Synopsis- Team Avatar failed to defeat the Fire Nation, and suddenly find themselves back at the beginning.

Part 1: One Door Closes...

Part 2: Another Door Opens

Part 3: Lazarus Syndrome

Part 4: This Pain is Familiar to Me

Part 5: Delay (My Body Catches up to my Mind)

Part 6: You are Different From Yesterday

Part 7: Meeting you for the First Time (Again)

Part 8: We Need to Talk

Part 9: Get it Right This Time

Part 10: Tense

Part 11: A Change

Part 12: Boiling Point (My Worry Tears me Apart)

Part 13: Play-by-Play

Part 14: MORTEM OBIRE

Part 15: I Think Of You As My Own (All That Matters)

Part 16: Witness

Part 17: A Thankless Job

Part 18 is on HOLD- REDRAWS of parts 1-9 are in progress, in preparation for the posting of this comic on Archive of our own. Expect updates to continue as normal by the end of November.

~

-things to keep in mind-

I am only one person. This series is not my top priority in my life, it comes second to college, work, self care, etc. I am however extremely passionate about this work, and will update whenever I have the time.

I am an artist, not a writer. While I am working to improve my writing skills, some story elements may have continuity errors, and characters may act ooc sometimes. I really appreciate advice on how to write better

My preferred method of telling my story is through music. The video versions are up on my TikTok (@ valkyrie1435) and will be posted here eventually as well. I will definitely draw in a comic format, but to get the full experience, watch the videos.

This story will feature many of the main cast members, but it is primarily Zuko-centric. He is my special interest character, so naturally I draw him the most.

I am autistic, so my interactions in comments and asks may be awkward.

If you have a question not related to this comic, ask it on my main account, @valkyrie1435 also, don't write an ask if you don't have a question. Please use the comment/reply feature on posts.

I need validation. Like any other artist, I can only motivate myself for so long without outside feedback. Commenting and engaging with posts is very encouraged!

The story is a work in progress. I am not entirely sure the direction this series will be taking, so feel free to speculate or give suggestions on what you would like to see.

Ships will not be a focus. If you are looking for atla ship content, you won't find it here.

Link to Spotify playlist of songs I have used in the video version of the comic V

[taffybee]

not that anyone's asking BUT my hot take on giovanni is he should be retired rn. not from like a "the pokemon company should stop talking about him" (weeeeelll that's sort of part of it but. hear me out) kind of way BUT in a. he should LITERALLY not be doing team rocket shit in ANY canon universe anymore. and it would be TOTALLY in-character of him to do so if the medias still using him characterized him the way he should be. welcome to my ted talk let me explain myself

FULL DISCLOSURE: i like giovanni. like, a not normal amount i fear. all of that opening sounds like i don't but i totally feel stupid emotions about this guy. anyways:

GEN 1. gen 1 games are like... NOT known for their compelling dialogue. and in cases like archie and maxie in gen 3 getting remakes in gen 6, their characterization and dialogue gets (kind of subjectively but i feel this is a popular opinion anyways) Much Better. i think that goes for a Lot of stuff where they give old guys new dialogue in spin offs (gestures at masters ex which i think is Great for making characters Actually Interesting)

but i feel like with giovanni there's been a DOWNGRADE in character since his appearance because he no longer Progresses.

i WILL say masters ex does Some Work to try and make him Deeper than just "I'm Evil for the sake of Being Evil grahgghh 😈" but it's like. overshadowed by All The Other Stuff.

plus he IS rainbow rocket giovanni in masters and i'm like OBSESSEDDD with team rainbow rocket. but i also don't think it should. Exist. I'M GLAD IT DOES but i find it out of character for giovanni to do At All. I CAN EXPLAIN I PROMISE.

team rocket's goals as an organization are and always have been: make money via stealing or otherwise exploiting pokémon. that's all it NEEDED to be. because it was gen 1 and no one needed to be ripping apart the universe yet.

giovanni himself sees pokemon as a means to an end. that much has stayed consistent in all of his appearances. but what CHANGES things in what happens when he LOSES for the FINAL TIME in r/b/y:

I WILL DEDICATE MY LIFE TO THE STUDY OF POKEMON. that's like CRAZY sort of redemption. and you Could argue against me to say "well have you considered he was lying" and i Have but i think it's SO much cooler if he was being legit. if he was so Changed by losing So Many Times to a little boy who just cared So Much for his pokémon that he needed to experience that for himself.

I mentioned in my previous giovanni post that pokémon origins has characterized giovanni "right" and THAT'S because via continuously fighting red and seeing his passion for battling as well as his love of pokémon firsthand, giovanni rediscovers his lost passion for pokémon that he had when HE was younger, and he sees HIMSELF in who red is and decides to disband team rocket after their gym battle so he can turn his life around. i HIGHLY recommend watching episode 3 of origins if you haven't seen it. it's freaking Marvelous.

ANYWAYS. THIS is the characterization of giovanni i support the MOST because it's not terribly complicated but still has nice depth to his character that you could read into.

BUT if we're going by this characterization of him, he should. NOT BE DOING TEAM ROCKET STUFF NOW! he SHOULD have been retired storywise by game freak after that and retired job-wise. studying pokémon and touching grass.

but THEN. gen 2 happens. (... well, gen 2 and the first gens 1/2 remakes.)

gen 2 introduces the concept of "let's bring giovanni back". which i wouldn't complain about if giovanni wasn't ALSO trying to get back. WHY. WE ESTABLISHED IN THE FIRST GAME HE'S DONE. and gen 2 didn't DIRECTLY SAY giovanni was up to come back (as far as i'm aware, i did NOT play gsc, someone correct me if i'm wrong). but when frlg released, they Changed dialogue from the original to FIT this idea:

NOW "studying pokemon" has become "training". there IS no character development for him here, he JUST wants to get stronger to be a Better mob boss. and this is supported by the celebi time travel event where he's ABOUT to rejoin team rocket before you beat him

the big problem with this (and any giovanni dialogue in the time travel event) for me is that it frames everything that happened to him in gen 1 as "giovanni wasn't a good enough mob boss then but now that he's had some time to Train he's ready to be a Better Mob Boss" WRONG! THAT WAS NEVER THE ISSUE!! part of the pros of team rocket at its peak was that giovanni was Unknown to most and could direct operations in the shadows AND he could keep his business as a gym leader because NO ONE KNEW. but now EVERYONE knows and team rocket can LITERALLY NEVER REACH THAT PEAK AGAIN. the ONLY CORRECT thing to do in this situation is Disband and Do Other Shit (cough cough study pokémon and touch grass cough cough)

this seems obvious to me that this desire to keep dragging him back into things is the games way of being like "woaahh!! callback time!!" and then later down the line "woaaahh!! nostalgia time!!!" (because they wouldn't have retconned that final gen 1 dialogue if it wasn't) and while i can Appreciate it to a degree (because i am Not Immune to getting STUPID EXCITED when old blorbos show up) i think continuing to make giovanni show up to Be Evil isn't the way to go about it. or at LEAST not canon timeline giovanni.

and the gen 1/2 remakes for ME is like... the beginning of the issue, but as we've gotten Further Away from gen 1 in time, the more i feel they stray from where he ended in the original in favor of making him More Blandly Evil. he feels constrained to one-liners about how the worlds an EVIL PLACE and he's just playing the game or whatever alpha sigma shit he's on in the masters trainer lodge

rainbow rocket is kind of CRAZY to me because they take this mob boss who likes exploiting pokemon and scientists for money and they make him start. opening interdimensional bad ending au wormholes to take over the world with aliens. (also having him willing to share the power with all the other evil bosses, some who have in their universes Successfully taken over the world??? heeeellll no. not even my proposed toned down characterization of this guy would be cool with that realistically.) it all just seems to be Way Beyond what team rocket SHOULD be doing. they're The Mafia. making The Mafia open wormholes is CRAZY. but giovanni HAS to be the main guy because. Nostalgia.

idk how much sense i make when i say this but when you make team rocket less cunning and less focused on doing their work in the shadows and running their shady operations stealthily. you get. a more ambitious team skull. and there's nothing WRONG with team skull but it's NOT WHAT TEAM ROCKET IS SUPPOSED TO BE. they've got more of a reputation than that but modern depictions of giovanni and the organization as a whole water him down to "i love Causing Problems" and less "i love Good Business"

whatever. giovanni in modern depictions MAKES SENSE if you followed along the slow regression of his character in real time. but i feel like if you look where he is now and look where he Ended in r/b/y you have like. Two Different Characters. and i think having a redeemed or even kind-of-half-redeemed giovanni could be SO much more interesting in showing up again than having him be Generally Evil

AND IT'S NOT LIKE THAT REALLY POSES ISSUES FOR MASTERS EX. cyrus is half-reformed WITHIN the story. archie and maxie too (although they were already kind of like that). lysandre HAS an evil moment but he DOESN'T DIE like he does in canon and THEN he's FINE. he still "runs" team flare but he's NOT LONGER A THREAT TO THE PROTAGONISTS

what i think COULD'VE been cool in some hypothetical scenario is have giovanni come back for cameos but Not as team rocket's leader. have him Turn Down the rocket admin radio broadcast. hell, having him come back to help the player Stop Them if he feels particularly annoyed. LET THAT MAN GO ON VACATION. WHATEVER. there's SO MUCH you can do with him the way cameos are done for the Other non-evil characters and there are options where you could Still battle him as a Test Of Strength but THERE'S JUST. SO MUCH WRONG WITH HIM STILL BEING OVERTLY EVIL.

i understand keeping giovanni evil for nostalgia. i Get it i PROMISE i do. i just think it makes him a weaker character, and the companies sacrifice character development for sales. but if you wanted to have a bad guy who was JUST BAD and would CONTINUE to be bad if given the chance,

GHETSIS IS. RIGHT THERE.

that's the end of that for me i think. i'm SO down to discuss or debate this take for fun. i just think giovanni should retire and pet his cat because it's funny.

[7grandmel]

Rip of the week: 25/07/2024

The End of HHGregg

Season 6 Featured on: Transmission Archive ~ The SiIvaGunner All-Star Nuclear Winter Festival Collection

Ripped by The Green Spy, CaptainComedy Visuals by Galacksy

(Note: MP3 embed is trimmed at the beginning as to allow it to be posted within Tumblr's file size limits)

I'm sure some of you were worried about where this week's post had gone. Worry not - I was simply biding my time for the day to arrive. Indeed, we have reached the 25th of July, a Thursday for some, and a national holiday for others. For today, we celebrate, grieve and toast to our dearly beloved, HHGregg. Today, it is Christmas in July, and time to at last cover The End of HHGregg.

For being one of my all-time favorite SiIvaGunner channel memes, I'm shocked at myself in how restrained I've been in covering rips using HHGregg's infamous red-tag-sale commercial. Sure, I spilled my soul out for the joke back with Nostalgic Blood of the Gregg ~ Old Source, and Everything Circus remains an all-time classic, yet there's still so much more to cover. In terms of jokes on the SiIvaGunner channel, I feel like HHGregg is one of the most developed ones, one with a legacy cherished by so many people on the team and off - and even a bit of a story to it that's been captured in full glory with today's rip.

Like sure, there's the obvious quirk that makes HHGregg stand out more than many other channel memes - the guy has an outright day-of-the-year holiday dedicated to him. As the infamous Christmas in July ad was what propelled HHGregg's moderately-annoying mascot into becoming a YTPMV star, July 25th on SiIvaGunner has become a sort of understated annual event for fans like myself, much in the same way that April 30th was with It's Gonna Be Me and guess what​?​?​?​?​?​?​?​?. Yet, of course, there's an underlying sort of sadness to HHGregg rips in particular due to the brand its attached to: the company that the ad's many YTPMVs are riffing on filed for bankrupcy in 2017, midway through Season 2 of SiIvaGunner. The store still exists now, bought by a parental company and turned all-digital, but the franchise as it was once known is all gone, with it's ill-fated mascot going down with it.

Of course, we don't really need to feel much remorse for the fall of an electronics boutique - but given the SiIvaGunner channel's way of personifying and giving life to in-jokes and gags the world over, it informs rips using HHGregg in a pretty different way. HHGregg rips on the channel had their biggest stride during the very same year that the chain went bankrupt, as if to suggest that the mascot was desperate to prove his own worth on the one place that still remembered him fondly. In the years since, we got sporadic shots of the guy here and there - and in my eyes, it at one point felt as if it all culminated with the rip エイチエイチグレッグ ホワイトハウスでチョー大変!, a fully-featured edit of Neon Genesis Evangelion's iconic A Cruel Angel's Thesis opening now starring HHGregg himself.

Yet, of course, as I've harped on about with rips like Shiny Smily TALE, Violet Snow Memories and Our Sweet Parsley, one of the most rewarding parts of following the SiIvaGunner channel lies in how the team never seems to forget about any of its zillions of uploads. No matter how much time passes, rippers love one another, the ideas they come up with, and the potential to build further on one another's ideas - it is a core part of YTP and YTPMV culture that's remained strong on SiIvaGunner since its very inception. The A Cruel Angel's Thesis rip above, by excellent rippers Ashley and GramBam36 of The Legend of Cage: Staff Roll fame, was a joyous celebration - a year later, as Season 6's sombre mood results in the Nuclear Winter Festival rolling around, a trio of rippers sees the perfect opportunity to finally put HHGregg to some form of rest. The meme's far from dead today, of course (check the channel right now) - yet, at last, with The End of HHGregg, it felt as if the funny paper roll man was finally ready to accept his fate.

The End of HHGregg, silly of a concept as it may be, executes that concept to a degree I don't think anyone was expecting. Second only to A Cruel Angel's Thesis, Komm, süsser Tod is an iconic piece that serves as the ending theme to the original NGE anime, one tied to feelings of bittersweet-ness, finality - at once able to reference one of the most classic HHGregg rips on SiIva, acknowledging HHGregg's bankruptcy, whilst tying itself directly to the ongoing Nuclear Winter Festival of Season 6. And that's not even getting into the rip itself!

The YTPMV work done here to sentence-mix and pitch-shift HH's various vocals to fit the melody of Komm, süsser Tod is, for lack of a better way to put it, downright remarkable. Despite a seemingly limited pool of voice lines to work with and a rigid framework of a melody, the guy only ever "sings" in complete sentences, with pitch shifting that manages to sound shockingly natural, still as gratingly chipper as HH tends to sound but still seeped in that vibe of bittersweet-ness that I discussed before. It goes through every beat and phase of Komm, süsser Tod without ever having the vocal samples sound forced, including the deeply inspired use of a layered, choir-like HH performance on several segments. Althewhile never forgetting the classic HH lines, the red-tag sales, the HD-TV and Whirlpool appliances, and of course, the Christmas in July. The cherry on top of it all is the intro to the song, before the main melody truly kicks in, as this little interlude sneakily includes a guitar now playing Deck the Halls just as featured in the most infamous Christmas in July ad - a sombre reminder of where it all began.

That aforementioned vibe is, of course, emphasized greatly by Galacksy's incredible illustration for the rip, the literal End of Evangelion depicted as being the fall of HHGregg as a whole, in absolutely spectacular fashion. Like with i love(d) you and so so many other rips, it's so often these seemingly small touches that end up elevating rips to all-time classics for me, and it's a trait that The End of HHGregg's audio also eventually contributes to, in a way I truly don't wish to spoil for you all. Nevertheless, the key takeaway here is one that's evident right upon first listen: This is a DAMN impressive YTPMV effort that at once celebrates and mourns one of the YTPMV world's most cherished sources, yet pulling it off as if it were effortless. In celebration of YTPMV, of SiIvaGunner, of one of the channel's most immaculate of somewhat-too-hidden gems from Season 5, and of the very state of memes coming to an end - The End of HHGregg is everything one could ask for.

Godspeed, you rolled-up brochure cretin. And happy Christmas in July to you.

[codingquill]

Why is landing an Internship as a Computer Engineering/Computer Science Student so hard ?

Hey there, dear coders!

I apologize for my long absence—life caught me off guard with a lot of work and projects. Now that I finally have some time, I wanted to make a post to connect with you all. Thank you so much for 1,000 subscribers! I know maintaining a community requires consistent posting, and I feel like many of you might have forgotten about me. But I promise to make something big out of this. I've been thinking about starting a newsletter where you can receive weekly emails from me, discussing something I learned that week or anything that intrigued me and I felt like sharing.

Now, back to our question: Is it really hard to land an internship as a computer science student? The answer is yes, and as a computer engineering student myself, I can attest to this.

I've often wondered why it's so difficult. After some observations, I discovered that almost every computer science student's resume looks the same. The portfolios are nearly identical, lacking uniqueness. If you've studied at the same school as your friends, what would make a recruiter choose you over them?

This is where uniqueness and a sense of self come in. Your portfolio or website should reflect exactly who you are as a person and highlight your strengths.

The second crucial factor is dedication. I've had classmates who are extremely dedicated. They might not have any special skills, but they show immense interest in what they want to do. This drive is palpable, and recruiters can sense it too.

Sometimes, the resume isn't even the most important aspect. For big companies like Oracle, what you say and know during the interview and technical tests matters more. The resume is just the very first step.

So, what I've learned along the way can be summed up in two words: uniqueness and dedication.

Now how to Create the Perfect Resume to Land an Internship as a Student ?

1. Keep the design simple:

Avoid extra designs or too many colors. While uniqueness is important, recruiters generally do not favor overly designed resumes.

2. Structure your resume properly:

- The Resume Header

Contact Information:

Full name and title: List your first and last name. Use the title of the role you want instead of your current title.

Professional email address: Use a clean format like firstname.lastname@gmail.com.

Phone number: Choose the number you check most frequently. Record a professional voicemail greeting if yours is too casual.

Address: List only your city and state. Let recruiters know if you're willing to relocate if applicable.

LinkedIn or other professional social media: Include your LinkedIn profile if it's active and relevant. List any portfolios or computer engineering-related sites.

- The Resume Summary

A paragraph where you describe yourself by answering these questions:

What is your professional style? (Use one or two descriptive words such as patient, critical thinker, consensus builder, excellent designer.)

What is your greatest engineering strength?

What will you add to this particular team?

What is your process for building and maintaining computer networks?

What are you proudest of in your career?

Example:

Motivated computer engineering student with a strong foundation in software development and solid analytical and problem-solving skills. Looking for an opportunity to enhance my skills in a challenging professional environment.

- The Employment History Section

Be specific about how you contributed to each position and the impact you made.

List the job title, organization name, dates of employment, and 3–6 bullet points showcasing your achievements.

Start each bullet point with a strong action verb like collaborated or designed.

Highlight significant achievements rather than just listing responsibilities.

If you have no experience, include a projects section. This will act as your experience. Highlight how you worked on each project and your passion for it.

- The Skills Section

Combine hard and soft skills. The skills section is often the first place recruiters look to ensure you have the key abilities they're seeking. Your entire resume should support the skills you list here.

- The Education and Certifications Section

List your education, including any relevant courses or special achievements during your degree. Also, mention any certifications you have, whether from freeCodeCamp, Google, Coursera, etc.

By following these tips, you can create a resume that stands out and showcases your unique strengths and dedication. Good luck with your internship search, and remember to stay true to yourself!

[nonotnolan]

No Not Nolan's Year in Review

Apparently this is a tradition now, so-- here are the stories of 2023, ranked by the number of likes.   It also helps keep me a bit grounded-- it feels rough when recent stories don't pick up stream, but the year as a whole has still gone quite well. It's also nice to see where all of my work falls, note-wise.  And if you're feeling very nostalgic (or horny?) here is a link to 2021, and here is a link to 2022.

I'm leaving the eBook announcement posts out of my year end review, but I'm calling it out for myself so when I revisit this in December 2024, future-me will remember to grab those. I'm not planning to abandon this account anytime soon-- and I'm certainly not shifting to Patreon or PayPal or what have you. I'm not prolific or popular enough for any of that. The vast majority of my work will continue to remain free and open. I just wanted to prove to myself that I'm good enough of a writer to publish something that I can be proud of-- I have, and I am.

Do authors love notes and reblogs? Yes. But they often enjoy hearing direct feedback even more-- I know I sure do. Consider "messaging authors directly" as a New Year's Resolution. (Please note that begging for someone to write you a story is not feedback. Don't be that guy.)

12) Green Grass - 122 notes - December 2023 Two guys learn first hand that not everyone values the same things. Concise and straightforward. 11) Soul Stones: Long Distance - 192 notes - April 2023 A romantic story of two men using the power of body swapping to close the gap on a long distance relationship. Cell phones have nothing on being there in person. 10) Colony Freedom - 197 notes - September 2023 A slime alien attempts to rebuild its colony from the ground up after its overseers have completely vanished. Can it manage to find enough hosts for its family, or will its cover be ruined? 9) Cuerpo Inc: After Hours Perk - 249 notes - July 2023 Ethan tries to pretend to be Jake for the weekend, but he wasn't counting on Jake's nosy neighbor getting But if he can't be Jake, at least he can still have fun in Jake's body. 8) Summer Break Dullahans - 252 notes - June 2023 Eric was not expecting to find Ben's detached head in the dorms. I'm a big fan of detachable limb stories, so I decided to be a part of the change I want to see. (I'm also very rusty at GIMP / photoshop, but it gets the job done.) 7) The Great Gym Shift - 275 notes - August 2023 A version of The Great Shift, but with a limited radius. A gym instructor is stuck babysitting a bunch of grown men who suddenly find themselves in very muscular bodies. 6) Just Another Sunday - 279 notes - October 2023 A Chronovac story with unaware recipients and a retroactive reality shift that ripples through reality. I'm really happy with this one, though I will freely admit that I lucked out on the photos for this one. 5) An Excellent Choice - 291 notes - February 2023 My Valentine's Day story, dedicated to my boyfriend. As such, the emphasis is on a merging transformation sequence. Two men take advantage of new technology to become a new sum of themselves. 4) Group Project - 331 notes - November 2023 Another work set in the Swapper universe, where college students take advantage of body swapping technology for success or pleasure. This piece features Aiden, who has to hire a nerd to take over his body if he wants to pass his classes. 3) Cursing Fate - 337 notes - January 2023 It's an alien possession story with a dark twist. If you're going to align yourself with an extraterrestrial force, make sure you have something valuable to offer them. 2) Soul Stones: The Easy Life - 412 notes - March 2023 Alfie finds himself in the body of Jordan, one of the most popular athletes on the football team-- but he's not the one who plotted for the body swap to happen. It's one of my favorites for the year, and it's a series I could see myself returning to if the inspiration is right. 1) Rookie Mistake - 482 notes - May 2023 A novice magic user tries out an Astral Projection spell without reading all of the instructions. Things do not play out in his favor.

Special Mentions-

Travis Cordin - 382 notes - February 2023 by @mergeman My boyfriend's Valentine's Day story that he dedicated to me. A raw and electric story about a magic user who gives the resident nerd too much magical power.

Stories I Love (Part 1) and Stories I Love (Part 2) I was not expecting so many people to react to these lists, but these have been getting reblogged like crazy. More importantly, a lot of authors have been reaching out to show thanks and start conversations, which I appreciate even more. Like I said-- I'm not always the best at participating in the community, so I really enjoy hearing from people.

Top 5 All Time-

5) Revenge, Reversed - 517 notes - August 2020 4) Overbearing - 538 notes - May 2022 3) Finals Week - 552 notes - May 2021 2) Gym Merchandise - 610 notes - September 2022 1) Soulmate Swap - 659 notes - August 2022

It's always fascinating to see which stories get a second life through reblogs and new discoveries. Soulmate Swap is one of my heavy hitters, but both Gym Merchandise and Overbearing have gained a lot of momentum this year. Finals Week is starting to slip, though I'm still quite fond of it. I'm quite surprised to see Revenge, Reversed on this list given its age, but it's another one of my personal favorites.

[dragonfly0808]

Flora: The Thesis

I had a feeling Flora would win, I’ve put my girlie through a lot, let’s do this!

THERE WILL BE MAJOR SPOILERS AFTER THE FIRST THINGS FIRST PORTION, IF YOU HAVEN’T MADE IT TILL CHAPTER 17 OF SEASON 3 (They Live in Spain but the S is Silent) DO NOT READ PAST THE FIRST SECTION

I’M SERIOUS, MAJOR FUCKING SPOILERS FOR FLORA’S CHARACTER ARC/PLOT POINTS AFTER THAT PART

First Things First

The first words that I wrote on Flora’s character sheet to sum up her character was in the OG are: kind, gentle mom-friend.

To me Flora in the original was kind of a breath of fresh air, seeing a soft girl get to also be a fighter was awesome (even if I feel like she was the one that was most often knocked out/down, cue the 84 times Flora nearly died compilation videos)

But… she was also a lot of wasted potential since I feel like she never really got her own storylines, or at least nothing interesting and her powers were never explored beyond plants despite being a fairy of nature, not plants.

Also, I found it weird that they just… dropped her love for making potions after season 1 or 2. Like… for what?

Those are a few of the grievances that I wanted to try and make better in my rewrite. Also, Flora was always my fave so I wanted to give her the attention she was deprived of (though, I reiterate, I do really try to pay attention to all 6 girls and, for the most part, am successful, but Flora will occasionally get just a little more attention)

Flora’s main character traits towards the beginning of the rewrite are: gentle, unsure and kind.

The first time we see Flora in the rewrite, she is seen to be very kind and maybe even a tiny bit conformational, quickly telling Bloom that she’ll switch sides and move plants if she wants her to.

She doesn’t really know how to put her foot down, she’ll be working on it but not truly implementing it until season 2.

I think a lot of people’s first impression of Flora would be that she’s a bit naive and even weak, that’s the thing with Flora.

Whilst her softness was forged in steel, it can deteer her from time to time and she easily feels guilty if she can’t make everyone happy. She has people pleaser tendencies that she’s working on.

I feel like in season 1 her softness walks a fine line between being a strength of hers and nearly being a weakness.

Being soft isn’t what what can be to her determent, it’s letting people cross her boundaries.

I also took her love for potions and ran with it, she is a potions prodigy and the teams main healer. She’s very dedicated to school and it shows in her work with potions.

Her main traits stay mostly the same over the seasons. There is still kindness and softness at her core, but overtime she is no longer unsure, she learns how to put her foot down and respect her own boundaries and really just stepping into her own and becoming more powerful and comfortable in her own skin.

She Doesn’t Succumb, She Overcomes

Flora grows a lot over the first 2 and a half seasons

One thing she overcomes, asides from learning to set boundaries and that she’s allowed to not forgive, she also overcomes a fear of being loved.

Flora has a lot of bad luck when it comes to people in her life fucking her over. Her biological father abandoned her and her mom and took all their resources with him, her first boyfriend assaulted her and then her first girlfriend Mirta breaks up with her to get back together with Lucy.

And then, in season 2, Bloom betrays her while being influenced by Darkar.

So… Flora is reasonably afraid when it comes to new people in her life. Especially people she falls for.

That’s where Helia came in. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

In season 3, THIS IS WHERE THE MAJOR FUCKING SPOILERS COME IN TURN BACK RIGHT FUCKING NOW I DID NOT BREAK MY BRAIN FOR ONE OF MY FAVORITE PLOT POINTS IN THE REWRITE FOR YOU TO JUST SPOIL IT FOR YOURSELF THIS IS YOUR LAST FUCKING WARNING, Flora suffers a major setback in her journey due to two big events.

First off, Sky choses her to burn while under Valtor’s curse and then, her powers seem to morph into something that she cannot understand and that she is afraid of.

This sets her back when it comes to finally being comfortable in her own skin… literally and being more confident.

She is terrified that her friends will turn their backs on her again to take Sky’s side. This fear is quickly quenched by Bloom making it clear on who’s side she’d be on if it came down to it but it still obviously affects Flora and we still haven’t gotten the talk between her and Sky, because she is still not ready to face him properly

Her scars are a side effect of this betrayal and she still has a long way to go before being able to show them

The other set back is in her powers after gaining Enchantix, where all of a sudden, it is a lot harder to make things bloom and heal people and rotting and withering things comes a lot more naturally.

We’ve gotten a bit of an explanation during the Crystal Labyrinth as to why this is the case but she still has a lot to learn in s4 about her new powers.

Thoughts Behind her Main Relationships

Aisha: Aisha is her best friend, their friendship is one of softness and getting out of their comfort zones. It’s the extrovert/introvert balanced friendship that helps them both feel more comfortable in their own skin.

Their friendship is, ‘you’re my safe place. I see you and I breath a little easier. You know me so well I only have to lift an eyebrow and you know exactly what I mean.’

Their friendship is ‘we’ve both been through complete and utter loneliness and we’re both afraid of people leaving but when I’m with you it all just fades away because your heart and my heart are made of the same material. Your softness will always bring me comfort and you’re familiar in a way that makes me want to weep because of how safe I feel at your side’

Helia: These two are just… two people trying to heal from their respective pasts but… okay so, they are two people who’ve been through a lot and have already been on their journey to healing or a while now and know their triggers and what helps them and just find calm and safety with one another.

It’s, ‘we’re both pulling ourselves back together after the worst events of our lives and you make me feel like all of it will never drown me and I know that my soul has known your soul for a very long time.’

But… while they are both on their way to healing, they’re both still scared.

Flora is afraid of someone she falls for hurting her yet again. Helia is afraid of not being able to connect with people, of the people he loves not wanting him.

They find comfort in each other’s love.

In each other, they find understanding and safety. They help each other on their healing journeys.

They’ll never turn away from each other even on the bad days.

Riven: Riven and Flora are soulmates. I have no other word to describe their bond. Even soulmates doesn’t feel like it can fully encompass their bond and how important they are to one another.

They have similar fears and traumas, though they respond in wildly different ways. He can’t let himself be vulnerable, she can’t stand her ground. But they find each other and somehow, they start healing and growing together

Their bond is ‘there are people that you just have to meet in order to become the best version of yourself and I know that if I hadn’t met you I would never have been able to become my best self. There are people that just have something to teach you just by knowing them, there are people that love you so purely that you can do nothing but want to grow with them and teach each other so much just by existing together. And you know that if there are other lives, you’ve met them in every past life and will meet them in every future life because you own a piece of each others puzzles that you both need to complete yourselves.’

Their love is absolutely pure, I just love it and can’t quite find the words to describe just how special it is.

Who is Flora in this rewrite?

Flora is a girl who wasn’t born to be a heroine, who had plenty of excuses to be angry, who had plenty of reasons to lash out at the world. If it’d been anyone else, they might’ve turned out a villain.

But she doesn’t. She doesn’t allow her pain and trauma to be the things that define her. They are a big part of who she is, there is no denying that, but it’s not what made her. She made herself. She made the conscious decision time and time again to chose love and softness and kindness.

She’s someone who’s on the verge of being a doormat before we meet her in s1, and who is working since s1 to be better at setting boundaries, to turn her softness into one of her biggest strengths and not just a trait that occasionally bites her in the ass.

She’s someone who is growing into herself, leaning that, while she has to grow, she doesn’t have to change her main traits to be stronger. To be respected.

She’s exploring both her powers and her softness.

Flora is both one of the softest and the strongest characters in this rewrite. She learns that those two don’t have to be mutually exclusive.

Flora is growth, not change. She doesn’t succumb, she overcomes. She’s not unscathed, but she is healing.

—————————-

Masterlist

Flora Moodboard

Flora’s Instagram

Flora and Aisha Moodboard

Flora and Helia Moodboard

Flora and Riven Moodboard

[nieded]

Hi! Not an ask, more like a confession. I just really felt compelled to tell you that #RainbowRoad is the absolute best fan-created work i’ve ever engaged with, and i’ve been a fan of many things! You are an amazing storyteller.

I also felt compelled to reach out because my friends & family are perplexed. I am perplexed. Primarily because:

1. I started watching DTS. Excellent. Normal for me to try on a new Netflix show….mostly. But is it really? Sports? Me?

2. I casually check out streaming options for the real deal, because you know, i’m curious, and oh! Would you look at that…it’s almost the end of fall break….

3. I subscribe and what’s this….I am absorbing F1. Like i’ve been starved for a sport to enjoy my whole life. Replays. Free practice. Fuckin Tech Talk.

4. Suddenly, I’ve watched 3 seasons of DTS and a disturbing amount of F1 content and it’s COTA Sunday and i’m on the couch, surrounded by snacks, insisting that we have to watch the WHOLE qualifying session not just the highlights because we need to get a feel for everyone’s headspace going into the race.

5. Post-COTA; We have decided Sainz is our driver to watch. I’m also really intrigued by McLaren rn someone pls help. We’re shouting as we watch live as Ferrari pulls a 1-2 and wow. When’s the next race?

6. Mexico City. MEXICO CITY. Sainz has been our man now for 10 days and forever. I suppose i’ll have to dedicate myself to Williams next season but I feel conflicted about that and WHY do I have an OPINION on that already. Who am I? Also can I watch the whole race again just tuned into Russel’s radio? Did he really ask mid-race for tea on Verstappen’s timeout? You don’t have to answer either of those questions i’m probably going look that up as soon as I finish writing you this manic soliloquy.

I’m not saying that you’re to blame for this complex crisis of identity happening over here, i’m really not. I just….I know the difference by now when i’m transfixed by something that’ll surely pass and…well…when I find something that compels me to sit tight & take hold.

On second thought, yeah. From one internet stranger to another, this is your fault.

And i’m enjoying every second of it. ♥️🏎️♥️

P.S. If there is going to be another #rainbowroad story I will be more excited about that than I am about GO3. This summer has been hard and engaging with your work has made it so much less so. Thank you ♥️🏎️♥️

hello! thank you sooooo much. i'm excited that you've gotten so into f1.

couple of things:

1 - i love carlos. he is my favorite himbo. he is so dumb sometimes. all that boy knows how to do is drive but damn does he drive well! i have felt for a long time that he's a sleeper agent. he just goes under the radar. you should look up the circumstances of his first few podiums. some of his biggest achievements have been afterthoughts, sidelined by other drama in f1. for example, when he did all those crazy overtakes during the sprint race and ended up in p2, nobody was talking about it at all! drove me nuts. it is such a sainz thing to be winning races and still losing his seat at ferrari.

2 - williams is worth being a fan of. they are one of the most historic teams and are wccs! i know that's strange to think if you're coming into the sport now, but there are many, many reasons to love williams. the other cool thing about the team is their principal, james vowles, was part of brawn gp. since you're diving into dts, i highly recommend watching brawn gp on amazon prime. you will also develop a love for jensen button.

also, i'm sorry your summer has been hard, and i am glad i could shine some light for you. my summer also was rough, and i still feel like i am recovering. i do have a story in the pipeline. it's still very much in its early development so i don't know if i will write it, but it does exist in my head!

[anogete]

Oh my goodness

Hello to anyone who remembers me. Real life and mental health both sank their claws into me. I've been avoiding social media because... well, many reasons but most because I feel like I'm a big ol' disappointment.

But today, I've come here like the humble whore I am to ask for a beta. Before you get excited, I have to warn you that it's not for Marvel, which (if you remember me) is what you likely know me for writing. Read on for an explanation about where the fuck I've been and what fandom I've spiraled down into lately.

In 2019-2020, I had a lot of grieving to do for some close loved ones who passed on. This led to a really shitty space for my mental health where I went into a functioning depression. I was doing things, but only the bare minimum required to exist without people catching on that I was in a bad mental space. I can't say I've completely kicked that, but I'm trying to do better. At the same time, I had a bunch of stuff going on a work. Specifically, I work for a team of advisors who provide financial planning services to individuals/families. I was promoted to an associate in 2020 and then we went through a merger with a larger firm in 2022. So, work has been crazy with me taking on additional responsibilities and working to build new processes after the merger. In addition, I managed to finish my bachelor's (20 years after I dropped out of college!) and take classes toward getting a CFP designation over the past 2 years. I'm scheduled to take the CFP exam in November. It's a 6-hour bear of a test covering pretty much all aspects of personal financial planning. And then next year I'll be continuing with my team as an advisor myself. Do I have anxiety? Fuck, yes. But I'm trying to stop cockblocking myself on the career front.

ANYWAY, enough with the boring stuff. I've been drowning in material for classes and studies with so little fun in my life. Somehow I got on CODTok (Call of Duty) and my little imagination ran wild as I watched these absolutely filthy edits of those boys. And for the first time in a long time, I felt that itch to write. I really should be focusing on studying for this exam, but all work and no play isn't fun. It's taken me 3 years to learn that lesson, but it has managed to finally sink into my thick skull.

My problem is that I know virtually nothing about Call of Duty because I don't like video games. As for the characters--I only know minimal info (mostly from YouTube videos and a COD wiki). It would be nice to have someone more knowledgeable than me to look over what I've written. And if not that, then it would be nice to have anyone other than me give it a beta read to point out my stupid mistakes or plot holes. I have about 16 pages of a Ghost/OFC written. It's my usual--heavy on the dialogue and sexual tension with a side of plot/action. I don't know how fast I'll be at writing this. Work is kicking my ass and I still need to dedicate my weekends to studying for this test. But if you're willing to take a little ride with me, I'd love some input. Send me a message or email me at anogete527@yahoo.com if you're interested. I miss and love ya'll.

[thehummingbirdpost]

Jewish Voice for Peace Advocates for Palestinian Rights

Dale Colleen Hamilton

edendale24@gmail.com

April 2024

My friend Esther Farmer has lived in Brooklyn her whole life. Her parents, Palestinian Jews, immigrated there in the 1920s. Her father, a politically progressive activist, was labelled a communist and black-listed, making it difficult for him to find work. Her mother was way ahead of her times and her support for the Palestinian cause was loud and often fierce and she battled sexism fearlessly.

Esther calls herself culturally Jewish, religiously atheist, politically non-Zionist and passionately pro-Palestinian. She’s been involved with Palestinian rights organizations for decades and is on the leadership committee of Jewish Voice for Peace, whose membership has exploded since the war on Palestine began. Their protests have attracted thousands of people and have included shutting down Grand Central Station and the Manhattan Bridge.

On my recent visit to New York City, I went with Esther to several pro-Palestinian anti-war demonstrations. She says there’s some form of pro-Palestinian protest almost every day, so there were plenty of choices. While I was there, she did a reading from a book she co-edited, A Land with People as well as several zoom presentations. She lives and breathes Palestinian rights these days. One of the most moving things I’ve heard her say is that her grandmother told her that Palestinians, Jews and Arabs used to live just fine together in Palestine, until in 1917 the British decided, in their imperial “wisdom,” to "declare" that Palestine should be a Jewish state through the Balfour Declaration.

The first protest we went to was intended to take place in front of the Brooklyn home of Chuck Schumer (Democratic Senate Majority Leader) but police in riot gear blocked his street. Schumer is being targeted, in part, because he was given over $100,000 in campaign contributions by pro-Zionist AIPAC (American Israeli Public Affairs Committee). In response to the police blockade, the effigies of dead swaddled children being carried by the protesters were laid at the feet of the police. And the protesters read aloud a list of 64 names of dead Palestinian children. These names represented one tenth of one percent of the children killed since Oct 7th. It would have taken 24/7 for 2 days to have read all the names. As the names were spoken, I found myself watching the faces of the police officers for any glimmer of support or remorse, but they were well-trained to show no emotion. However, as the procession wound through the Saturday farmers’ market, many people stopped and quietened respectfully.

Another protest we attended was staged in front of the United Nations in Manhattan. Again, riot police were in full force. Although no arrests were made, Jewish Voice for Peace always has a lawyer present and a team of members ready to support anyone who does get arrested, as was the case during the Grand Central Station action, where over 300 people were arrested. To me as a Canadian gentile outsider, the most striking element of this protest was the range of participants, including Armenian and Kurdish rights activists, an Iranian Feminist group and about a dozen Orthodox Hasidic Jews, who have been demonstrating for Palestinian rights and denouncing Zionism and the Jewish state for years. It was the Sabbath so they aren’t allowed to take public transit or drive, so they had walked from Williamsburg, over 6 kms each way. Although Hasidic Jews are sometimes criticized for sexist practises, I couldn’t help but admire their dedication to the Palestinian cause.

In between demonstrations, we had the best Middle Eastern food I’ve ever experienced at a Palestinian restaurant called Ayat on Cortelyou Road in Brooklyn. Their menu includes a call for an end to the occupation and asks diners to “pray for peace for all”. The meal we had there felt sombre, but it also felt like a celebration of the swell of awareness and support for Palestinians and a rethinking of what it means to be Jewish and Israeli and the role US-made armaments play in the genocide.

By a stroke of dumb luck, I got the last rush ticket to see a sold-out play called The Ally, at the Public Theatre in Greenwich Village. In keeping with the apparent theme of my trip, it was a play about the Palestinian Israeli conflict. It presented all sides of the issue, which left my head spinning. In the lobby after the performance, a man who sounded like he knew what he was talking about said he thinks it will be remounted, which makes sense, seeing as it’s such a timely and important topic.

And oh yes, by way of contrast, while in New York I also experienced cherry trees in bloom (eerily early), an earthquake (4.8 magnitude centered in New Jersey) and the solar eclipse, which we watched grow to 90% totality in Prospect Park. And after the intensity of the protests, back at Esther’s each evening, we’d sit on the couch and watch Democracy Now and Aljazeera, trying to make sense of a world apparently on a collision course with itself.

[archiveofkloss]

There is no question that Karlie Kloss is the ultimate achiever. Known for her work as a supermodel, you may be surprised to learn that Kloss is also an entrepreneur, philanthropist, and mom. And now she can add “Thorne partner” to her resume as the face of our latest global brand campaign, Find Your Way.

Kloss took some time out of her busy schedule to sit down with our team and share a bit about why she loves the brand and what the Find Your Way message means to her.

1. Thanks for taking the time, Karlie! How were you first introduced to Thorne and why do you trust us?

Certainly! I first heard about Thorne from my nutritionist and was drawn to the brand’s meticulous focus on clean, high-quality ingredients. Thorne’s dedication to quality and science is why I trust them. Their process is super transparent, which gives me peace of mind that I’m properly fueling my body.

2. What does the “Find Your Way” message mean to you and how do you embody that in your everyday life? 

For me, it’s about staying curious, finding your own personal way to the healthiest and most meaningful life possible. It’s very authentic to the way I live my life because I’m constantly having to balance my variety of interests and aspirations with my daily health regimen, and overall busy lifestyle.

A lot of people know me for starting my career in fashion as a young girl, but modeling is just one facet of my career – my path has never been linear.

I went back to school, learned to code, and started Kode With Klossy, an organization to teach other young women and gender expansive youth how to code. I also consider myself an athlete. But my most important job is being a mom to my two young boys.

3. What are your favorite Thorne products?

My favorite Thorne products are PharmaGABA-100 to support better sleep, Magnesium CitraMate for overall wellness, and Vitamin C for immune support. I also love Memoractiv for brain health support and the Basic B Complex for enhancing energy. These have all made a big difference in supporting my healthy routine.

4. You love fitness! Can you talk about your passion for movement and how you found it?

It started at a young age with ballet. Ballet taught me the importance of discipline and strength. Over the years, I’ve explored various forms of exercise, from running and cycling to yoga and Pilates. Each activity offers something unique, whether it’s the meditative quality of yoga or the adrenaline rush from a run. Movement is a vital part of my life, helping me stay centered and energized.

5. You also love food! How has your approach to nutrition evolved over your lifetime?

It’s definitely changed! Growing up in the Midwest, I learned to love food from an early age and still love to indulge now. But it’s all about balance, maintaining a healthy relationship with food, and understanding what makes me feel my best. 

As I have gotten older, and through my pregnancies, my relationship to my body and focus on overall wellness has become a lot more holistic. It’s not about fitting into a certain size; it’s about taking care of my body from the inside out so I can keep up with my busy life! 

6. What exercise and nutrition advice do you have for busy readers?

People are always asking me how to manage a busy lifestyle. I’d say finding a routine that works with your schedule is key. Even quick workouts can make a big difference! I try to aim for consistency over perfection.

When it comes to nutrition, I recommend focusing on foods that are packed with nutrients and give you lasting energy throughout the day. And don’t beat yourself up when you indulge – enjoy what you love!

7. You’ve mentioned that you are oddly competitive with yourself about rest! Can you talk about the importance of sleep?

Throughout my teens and twenties, between school, work, traveling, late nights, and early mornings, to try and squeeze in everything I needed to – the thing I would always compromise on if needed would be my sleep.

Something changed during the pandemic when I stopped constantly working and traveling, and actually prioritized my rest. It was life changing. I have found it has helped improve my skin quality, my mood, my energy... I felt like I was suddenly more present in every aspect of my life – my work, my work outs, my relationships. It was a major wake up for me.

So now, I keep track of my sleep patterns and try to stay consistent, even when things get busy. Quality rest helps me do better in every part of my life.

8. People appreciate the importance of fueling for sports performance but fueling for mentally-taxing exercises (for example, coding) seems to fly a bit more under the radar. Can you talk about the importance of getting the nutrients you need to support your creative endeavors?

Research shows that our brains consume around 20 percent of our metabolic energy, so the idea of “brain food” is real! Nutrition and oxygen are crucial for optimal cognitive function, so I focus on foods rich in omega-3s and antioxidants. It's easy to say and harder to do, but staying hydrated, eating balanced meals, and limiting my sugar and caffeine intake help my concentration and creativity.

9. What other wellness topics or facts do you “geek out” over?

I'm a deep believer in the impact mindfulness exercises like meditation and yoga can have on your wellbeing. I'm fascinated by the science of nutrition and how different foods affect our organ function, our cellular health, and overall energy and mood. I'm also very interested in sustainable living and how it connects with personal health.

10. What insights or tips do you have for readers who want to exercise their mind? 

Exercising your mental muscles is just as important as going to the gym! When I have some downtime, I love to read, and I always set aside time every day for meditation, one of my favorite mindfulness exercises.

I’m also working on learning Spanish with my kids. I’m almost fluent in French, so that’s something I wanted them to start learning while they are young so they can use it for a lifetime.

[dors-ee]

Headcanons Petra! (Petra Ral from AOT)

Hi! Here is a list of headcanons about Petra! I'm never going to write about those (no time, want, skills) but I feel the urge to put them out so here they are (they're about Petra mainly, but ships are mentioned. I also have HC about the other members of the squad, but not here. this is long enough already haha.) :

1. I see her as someone anxious in general (with an anxiety disorder eventually) and struggling a lot with the idea of being loved for herself. She is the team player, she is there for other and valued about what she can bring to them. What she can do. But then it poses the question : "can I be loved for myself? and not what I can bring people?" I think that even if she is popular she does really struggle with this, people and being friendly. And loved. (And if she survives after the war there'd be a big identity crisis : is she truly who she is or was it forced upon her by the situation? Does she even want to be that teamplayer/people person. Dedicated fully to helping others to the point of losing herself in the process? Does she has a right to not want it/fell comfortable in it. More on the next HC.)

2. If she survived she would have left after the war to travel and help rebuild. It took her years to come, if she came back at all. (In my old rivetra verse she comes back... or she did at first. Now I don't know.). I think the special situation, and who she is as a person, would lead to some complexe psychological stuff. They go from people that dedicated their lives to humanity, basically giving their whole, existing by and through others to... well. freedom. And the country that you know: committed a genocide. And Petra for me is someone that herself would have an identity crisis, and guilt. Who is she? She always was the team player, the people person, the glue of the teams she was on. She was dedicated. Total abnegation.

So now it poses the question: is she truly like that? Is it truly her... does she want it to be her?

But, there's also guilt, a feeling of obligation  maybe. Yes it wasn't her fault, or evene those of most of thr civilians, but still! The world is destroyed. Does she has a right? to be free? To ask those questions about herself? and contemplate the idea to stop, stop giving, stop helping, and take care of herself? doesn't she has a moral obligation to help rebuild?

Does she has a right to not be helping others?

I think there's also trauma, and that's what she's known her whole life : belonging to a higher cause. Existing by and through it.

So yeah. Trauma, guilt, identity crisis. She leaves, to go helping.

3. She is not dedicated to Levi himself but humanity. And Levi is the hope for it, so she follows him as a symbol, but not him as a man. He is just a man. And she is independant.

But I do see her as someone passionate that does need to dedicate herself, get her whole being into something. Like well humanity, or in modern days I see her as a ballerina, or other professions like that that just take you whole.

She needs to belong to something, she has a lot of passion and needs to get it out. But it's a dedication to something, not someone, whatever her ship is.

4. I like her better unattached. Or with women/afab people.

(Also, I used to think Petra might get a kid or two but now I don't really see her with kids at all. 🤔 She is maternal yeah, but I don't see her having her own, or like wanting her own. I actually wrote in the lantern festival some kid thing, but I really changed my mind since then. 🤔 Changed my mind about a lot of things.)

5. She's a good leader. She could have her own squad. She's actually Levi's true second in command I think.

6. She doesn't actually have "a temper". She is calm and mature. But yeah, she can get defensive and assertive and a bit impulsive. But she doesn't "have a temper". She stands her ground and she cares about things and people, she is a passionate person. But she doesn't have a temper. She is patient. And more of a reserved, calm, silent person, observative too. Very observative actually.

(for me, those are my personal HC! and nothing wrong with having a temper. I'm pretty impulsive myself.)

7. Being the team player actually means a lot in terms of skills. It means that one is very observant, but also very reactive and very very adaptable. Lots of very. They don't just have to insert themselves in situations, they have to do it well, and in adequation with the situation and the person they are helping. All of that in urgent situations with very little time to see and decide and act. They also have to know when they are needed exactly, be able to insert themselves, so they need to see where and how they can act but also communicate it to not surprise the other person.

It also means thinking on the spot, very quickly. Then, eventually switching everything in an instant.

So it's also being adaptable and reactive.

So yeah.

Lots of skills with that position. (haven't listed them all I think. Really a lot of skills, when you think about it.)

8. Not a HC but canon I believe, but she loves sweets.

9. Her mother died when she was young. Her father was absent for a while, emotionally I mean, and let her deal with herself, a bit Like Riza in FMA. But contrary to Riza he was never abusive, and he came back. +In FMA it was never said if he always was like that or not I believe. Petra's father was very loving. He just withdrew emotionally because of grief, and I imagine fell into depression. They never talk about it.

10. Her mother was working in wall Mitras, military police. But they lived in a village in a rural, forest, area.

11. In modernAU/our world AU she is scottish

12. modern AU, our world or SNK, she is a ballerina. It just fits her so well I think. The feminine delicate looking, being but also being incredibly strong and determined and disciplined. Also soulful, sensitive bc art, and giving her whole to something. There was more about that but I wrote this so long ago, right now it doesn't come to my mind. but Yeah, that duality inherent to ballet and ballerinas and Petra herself. Also I don't know, it just fits her. I had more to say about this topic that will forever be lost to the bottomless depths of my memory. Lots of things lost there.

14. She had a few dalliance with other women when in training and her first years in the corps.

15. She is around 26/27 when she dies.

16. She loves movement. She just loves moving, that's a part of her. And as sensitive and emotional and soulful as she is, she expresses herself through movement, not words. But she loves to read. She is someone of movements and actions.

17. Don't ask why but I now ship her with Viktor from Tua. Or Hanpeto (masc Hange more). But Viktor more.

My interest and fandom switched, but I can't leave Petra behind fully... So I still have some unfinished Rivetra, and Petra and squad, and some Hanpeto stuff to post. Drawings/paintings mostly but also some writings, to get out. I can't let go of them. Many are unfinished and Idk if I'll be able to finish the written ones. Or maybe I could post them unfinished. But I have some finished OS I just have to edit and post. Some were supposed to belong to bigger stories but well... :(

My interest has dropped. I am battling the idea of not having produced some things I really am proud of and happy with for the fandom, like not having represented the character as I wanted. Not having said and shown the things I wanted to say and show. Maybe I am just too hard on myself. I was proud of things I wrote and painted when I did them.

But anyways interest is not there anymore so eh. I also have ideas I think could be very interesting but never managed to finish and now I don't think I will manage, same reason. My adhd brain is not interested in it anymore so it doesn't see the point and I have so much things I'm not interested in but must do to do already...

Anyways. If you made it here, congrats on surviving my ramblings :) I still have some things related to Petra even Rivetra to post as I said. Just don't know when 🙈 But if there's a few people still into Petra and the squad, eventually Rivetra and some Hanpeto, there is some more to come :)

I already rewrote this post a 100 times and edited it a 100 more. If I don't post it I' never going to and it will nag me until the end of time. So here. If there are any questions, disagreements, don't hesitate to as I'll be happy to reexplain/explain better.

[swissboyhisch]

How Karate Shaped Me Into Who I Am Today (Connor McDavid x Reader Blog Post)

Karate; A martial art that works around the concept of taking down your opponent with one strike. It was the sport I took up when I was only six after my father had taken me to his friend's dojo to have a look. It was thanks to my father I started the journey to where I am today, a four-time world champion in both of my events with my eyes set on Tokoyo 2020.

When I was 6, I was a quiet girl who kept to myself and my two friends, Connor and (Y/b/f/n). I had few friends and struggled to make more at school. That was until about six months after I had enrolled in karate. Karate boosted my confidence in myself and helped me make many friends. Essentially, they became more like another family to me. Similar to how Connor considers the Oilers as his family. 

It wasn't until I started competing that I truly began to understand why I was so in love with the sport. The sense of family within the team really escalates once you begin to compete. But what I fell in love with was the fast pace of the day or weekend. From the early starts to make sure you're there for the bow in, to the grueling kumite fights. Depending on which events I am in, affects how my day will be.  I could start my day with some judging or coaching; other days, my event may be first on the mat. I could spend the whole day judging (minus my events).

With each competition, I became more confident in myself and my abilities. I started to open up more to other people. Because of this, I had made friends with other karatekas from other provinces and countries. With each new friend, I was becoming more outspoken and extroverted. 

It wasn't until I was 12 and represented Canada for the first time that most people realised how much I had grown. I went around between my events and talked to everyone on my team. Once I had spoken to everyone, I moved on to other national teams. Starting with the USA, of course, I often moved onto the Australian and New Zealand teams next. Some of these people I still keep in contact with to this very day.

These are my friends from the French national team that I made a few years ago when I was 15. This photo was taken last year at the world championships. I love seeing all my friends from different countries. It's like a competition between the competitors to take photos with as many teams as you can. 

Honestly, without karate, I don't know what I'd be doing. I train every day, dedicating my life to becoming the best athlete I can (like many other professionals). I'm so excited for the next coming years, especially with the Olympics which includes karate for the first time. I have been waiting for years for this, and I'm excited about the outcome.

TAG LIST:

@penny4yourthoughts @mp0625 @hischierhaze

@dinonuggetsthings @francesfarhadi

[mikelogan]

Is it bad that like—if she doubles down on all this and tries to justify it I’ll quit listening to her music; of course I will.

But I don’t want to have to do that. I’ve been listening to her since elementary school, and up until this point she’s been the only artist I grew up with who hadn’t done/condoned anything horrible. (I’m still shocked by what Demi confessed to a few years back and the way that was played off.)

I want Taylor to dump him and address this because it’d be the right thing to do. But it’s also because I just want one artist I liked growing up to not be terrible.

to put it plainly, this fucking sucks. i don't want to stop listening to her music either. i relate to a lot of it and i also grew up listening to her. i think im especially disappointed by all this bc of her seeming so dedicated to speaking out against injustice and it makes all of her "activism" seem performative. ive seen a lot of different posts floating around since this has all come to light, but the one that resonates with me the most is that she can't not know about all the shit he's said and done. she's obviously active online -- she knows about people thinking she hates evermore and the whole "mother is mothering" stuff, etc -- and while i think it's plausible that she's sent some of these things by members of her team, i find it so hard to believe that she's just totally unaware of all m*tty's bullshit. i literally never listened to the 1975 until i just saw them on snl maybe a few weeks ago and i liked a couple of the songs, but i remember hearing things over the years (I used to be suuuuper active in bandom #rip) about him just. not being a good person. i don't think i knew specifics, but it's why all of this coming out about him doesn't particularly surprise me, though it does disgust/horrify me. like i get her needing a rebound bc like. after 6 years with someone, that has to hurt?? and we have literally no idea what even happened between her and joe bc they were so private to begin with. so i understand that she's hurting and probably not in the best mental place, and while she's entitled to do what (and who) she wants, that doesn't mean im gonna just. sit by and not say anything about it? and this is so incredibly unlike 2016 when people were cancelling her left and right just bc theyd been foaming at the mouth for excuses to do so. im not even advocating to cancel her (still holding out hope that she addresses this somehow), but i am in favor of holding her accountable. i also understand the whole "separate the art from the artist" thing to an extent. who immediately comes to mind on that topic though is jk r*wling, who turned out to be essentially rhe biggest disappointment of my life. her views and beliefs have stained what she created, to the point where i don't even want to associate myself with hp despite having grown up with it and having it be a big part of my life. Im not to that point with Taylor's music (though I will say this has made me a lot less excited for my show next month), but I COMPLETELY understand what you're saying. Like why is it so much to ask for artists/celebrities in general to not be terrible people? Like even if she's not the one saying the things he's said, she's still with him and has said nothing about any of his statements. As a white person, I know that I'll never fully understand what it's like to be part of a victim of racism and that I cannot speak to what that's like. I have privilege in that regard. I have the ability to shrug my shoulders and say "That's not my problem" and move on. But I don't want to. I want to hold taylor accountable for all she's said and done to make us think she loves and supports her fans. But this has to feel so alienating for members of the groups m*tty's said shit about. We love Taylor and a lot of us look up to her and we want her to be happy. But this ain't it, not by a longshot.

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 23/02/2024

Through the F​-​F​-​Fire and the F​-​F​-​Flames

Season 5 Featured on: SiIvaGunner's Highest Quality Rips: Volume D

Ripped by R.L.99

In my excitement leading up to February 22nd and to finally get to write more in-depth about Kara's Flowers' meaning to the SiIvaGunner channel...it dawned on me a bit too late that I was ignoring another meaning to the very date before it. I'm still very proud of how the post on As Miku Collides connects together with Collision Clouds, but there was something far more important to remember from February 21st. The birthday of late ripper R.L.99.

R.L.99 is the second known SiIvaGunner team member to have left us in tragedy, and its always going to be a very difficult topic for someone like me, effectively an outsider, to approach. The first was Marrow, who I've written about thrice now with Telling Fish Tales, Turnabout Fishters and 8​-​bit Fish With Dreams - a true friend to the SiIvaGunner team whose contributions are too many to list, but had been present since the very early days of Season 1. I can't claim to have known the guy, nor ever claim to have felt the same grief that his friends did upon his passing - yet althesame, through how recognizable and frequent his contributions were, losing him did hurt. Yet with R.L.99, my heart sank for a somewhat different reason. I'd barely had the time to truly appreciate him before he was gone.

As a ripper, R.L.99's most defining trait lay in his ambition - he was always seeking to outdo his last work, always shooting higher, yet higher. Joining the team early into Season 5, his twenty-one contributions across the year, ambitious or not, all feel crafted to a sheen. In a Season that already had some of the strongest output in the channel's life, his rips often still managed to impress beyond those expectations. I described one instance of this occurring on my one prior post on the ripper, One Winged PSYcho - V​.​S. Sepsyrop, but it needs to be reiterated that this was effectively standard procedure for each of his big projects. But despite the reverence I hold for him now, I'd chosen the worst possible timeframe to begin distancing myself from SiIvaGunner - during Season 5, I was at my most disinterested in the channel's goings-on, and thus paid far too little mind to the incredible efforts the entire team were making during the year. I'd check in, add some rips to playlists, and check out.

When the news of R.L.99 broke early in Season 6, I didn't know what to think, because...I didn't know R.L.99. But as I looked through my own playlists, looked through his list of contributions - I realized that just about everything he had ever made had found its way into my list of all-time favorite rips. I'd loved his work without ever truly acknowledging or understanding who made it. Without ever having had the chance to truly show my appreciation, until it was too late.

Linked under his username credit at the start of this post, you'll find a Twitter thread I made two years ago now, the day the announcement was made. I wasn't able to appreciate him during his time, but on that day I wanted more than anything else for other people still like what I once was, people far too blind to the talent and care individual rippers put into their work, to know exactly what kind of legacy he left. And so, I put the thread together as one of my first-ever forms of written SiIvaGunner analysis, trying to concisely convey all the ways that R.L.99's work truly was unique - in all the ways I'd failed to pick up on before it was all too late. There was, of course, a lot missing from that thread - notably the as-of-then unreleased rips he'd made that would be uploaded the day after in his memory, culminating in the downright breathtaking Dancing Masked. Yet, I still want to dedicate todays post to a rip I'd heard from before that day, one of those rips I'd loved for so long without knowing the man behind it. A rip like Through the F​-​F​-​Fire and the F​-​F​-​Flames.

A hugely ambitious project, it feels difficult to find one rip that quite so concisely encapsulates all the qualities of R.L.99's work. A distinct love for the MOTHER series, a love for rip arrangements of popular music, a love for Rock music, and the aforementioned scope - it all culminates in a nearly 8-minute long tribute to the legendary Through the Fire and Flames by Dragonforce. Althewhile, it adheres incredibly well to the expected restrictions of a Game Boy Advance game, each of the shredding guitar samples used being from MOTHER 3 itself, with vocals authentically bit-crushed to match. It manages to rock out incredibly on its own, and that's without mentioning the insane details strewn throughout, such as the song's occasional bumps in tempo to match other boss music within MOTHER 3, or the other songs from MOTHER 3 that become referenced throughout the arrangement. Released on the date of MOTHER 3's birthday, much like Jesus of the Underground - it's a beyond impressive tribute, with love shown in every second of its runtime.

The fact remains, though, that I never knew R.L.99, and never knew Marrow either for that matter. There's far, far too many rippers that I've still not been able to express my full gratitude and affection toward, and many of which I'll likely never be able to reach. But that's part of why I want to run this blog in the first place - to give myself, and other SiIvaGunner fans that chance to show genuine, outspoken love for rips and the people behind them while we all can.

Rest well, R.L.99.