#most fucked up image of all time we all gotta die.

[gh0st-patr0l]

Dylan and I were on call and he reminded me this photo exists and I almost threw the fuck up. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM!!!!!!

[foone]

The worst part of working at the Dimensional Nexus is that we don't get the regular internet there so you can't just watch your shows on Netflix or whatever. We gotta stick to analog media, since the digital stuff doesn't deal well with the temporal flux (the analog stuff doesn't either, but it's usually just a fuzzy image for a second, while your computer just crashes).

Everyone brings in their favorite media from home on old analog tapes (or laserdiscs. They're analog too! And we've got a couple hardened players on the lounge, so we can watch them).

Anyway while you're on-base (which could be for months or years), all your (video) media consumption ends up being on CRTs and piles of tapes you brought or traded with coworkers. Most people bring in a second suitcase of tapes so they'll have something to watch.

I brought in some letsplayers I stuck on a few VHS tapes (yt2vhs is a great program), and box sets of Star Trek: TNG and DS9.

About a month in, the trades really open up, as everyone has watched their own tapes and wants more. I got a good deal on a laserdisc of the Soviet version of... Well, nevermind. But let me just say, in my defense, the author of the books never went off the deep in in that universe, and the Soviet version wasn't made with her cooperation, anyway. I know that's sometimes a little difficult for people from the 91-verse to believe, but that's not the author's reputation in the rest of the Nexus.

Anyway I traded my TNG episodes for VOY. I've seen TNG a dozen times, so I figured it was time to go back over VOY.

It seemed to be pretty similar to what I remembered (other than them killing off Seska of all people at the beginning of S3? Who kills off your series's main villain?!) but at the end of S3 I hit the big divergence between our universes:

Seven. They introduced him early on in Scorpion, part 1, earlier than I remember.

The storyline goes mostly the same, with just a little less 7/Janeway romantic tension (do they even get together in this version? I'm gonna have to wait until season 5 to find out!)

Harry Kim lives in this version of Scorpion, too. I'm not sure why that is, they were clearly setting him up to die? Probably some executive meddling or something. I don't have access to Trekpedia (especially in that universe!) to check.

But yeah. This is one of the universes that got the twinky Seven instead of the catsuit-girl version (Not that this version wears any fewer catsuits). They got 9 seasons instead of the usual 5, so I'm excited to see if those extra ones are any good. When I was picking up the tapes I was surprised how many there were, and Josh told me in his universe they get home in season 6 and the remaining 3 seasons are a sort of spin-off/reboot done when Orbita took over from UPN.

Can't wait to see how that goes. More Star Treks need a post-script season (or three) made in the USSR!

Anyway I'm already looking forward to finishing this because I've already gotten a lead on a copy of TNG where Yaphet Kotto said Yes to the Picard role (sadly that version doesn't have the quintessential Jeffrey Combs as Riker, but I hear some people swear by the Gregg Marx Riker).

Still looking for any copies of the Kim Miyori-as-Data version of TNG. That one wasn't as popular (not it's vault! They had the US Doctor Who and both the Star Wars shows to go up against) so it's less likely to be brought in, but I'm always checking video libraries whenever I'm in that universe. Someday I'll find it. I found that fucking CED of the Walken A New Hope, I'll get the girl!Data TNG one of these days!

[fuck-you-upmusicbracket]

Achilles Come Down (Gang of Youths)

The self is not so weightless, nor whole and unbroken/Remember the pact of our youth/Where you go, I’m going, so jump and I’m jumping/Since there is no me without you

How, the most dangerous thing is to love/How, you will heal and you'll rise above/Crowned by an overture bold and beyond/Ah, it's more courageous to overcome.

You may feel no purpose/Nor a point for existing/It's all just conjecture and gloom/And there may not be meaning/So find one and seize it/Do not waste your self on this roof

Soldier on, Achilles, Achilles, come down/Won't you get up off, get up off the roof?

"I'm sure you'll get other submissions for this one. I have no idea who this band even are outside of this song but it fucks me up like it does everyone else. It's the tragic love of it all. The desperation of trying to save your loved one from themselves. Or are the narrators of the song Achilles' own conscience representing his indecision on whether to kill himself or not? It can mean so many things and SO many parts of the lyrics are very poetic and powerful. (also again for me this makes me cry over a Specific Blorbo in this case Dimitri Blaiddyd but that doesnt matter)"

"The cellos in the background, the lyrics, telling the story of Achilles, the fact that it's fucking 7min long, it's beautiful, it breaks me to then pull me back together, it gave me hope in a moment where I wasn't in the best mental space, it's like getting undressed to your very soul only to be cover up with a weighted blanket afterwards and be told "it'll be alright." It's like that image with the guy that's like "this is cinema" but with a song, god I love this song so much"

"Ohhhg my god. It’s so. It’s a fucking heartbreaking song but it gives hope (^^see abovw lyrics. there may not be meaning so find one and seize it gets me the most). I can’t say anymore about it but yeah"

"Achilles is about to jump off the roof, his lover is trying to convince him not to. the vibe of this song itself is so unique, the violin and the segments of French reading really grip at your soul. Towards the end there are two voices seemingly arguing. One voice is Achilles’s inner monologue and the other is his lover trying to yell over it. This part is my favorite, especially if you’re envisioning your blorbo. Tbh in my darkest times I would fall asleep to the ten hour loop every night. It felt like laying on a rooftop and looking out at the stars and the street lights. I think maybe it kept me from doing things I would regret."

Fast Car (Tracy Chapman)

You got a fast car, I want a ticket to anywhere/Maybe we make a deal, maybe together we can get somewhere/Any place is better, starting from zero got nothing to lose/Maybe we'll make something, me myself I got nothing to prove

So I remember when we were driving, driving in your car/Speed so fast, I felt like I was drunk/City lights lay out before us/ And your arm felt nice wrapped 'round my shoulder/And I-I, had a feeling that I belonged

You got a fast car/Is it fast enough so we can fly away?/We gotta make a decision/Leave tonight or live and die this way

"I know it's an obvious one but YOU try playing it without crying I dare you"

"I cant explain the yearning but this makes me howl"

"OH GOD the longing!! The yearning in the recurring central image of the narrator and her lover on the highway, feeling this sense of limitless possibility and incredible hope!!! And then the verses take us with brutal efficiency through the collapse of their marriage, the way that the cycle of poverty stomps down on their hopes, and how with nothing left, the narrator does what her mom did and leaves!! Leaving the kids to experience the same thing she did growing up!! But it’s all punctuated and bookended by these callbacks to that central iconic memory of hope!!!!! But by the end we realize that the last line “leave tonight or live and die this way” offers only the illusion of a choice: when the narrator first runs away and later when she leaves her husband and kids, she’s still fulfilling her role in this cyclical generational story. God!!"

Fast Car submitted by @smallboyonherbike + @uchihasasukeofficial + @all-our-exploring

[shion-ah]

Death of me

Cillian Murphy as Thomas Fucking Shelby

"Do you honestly think I could ever forget?"

Hayley Atwell as Katherine Redwine

"Christ...just tell him or I will."

Annabelle Wallis as Grace Burgess

"Is that jealousy I hear?"

Joe Cole as John Shelby

"You'll always be a Shelby never get that."

Paul Anderson as Arthur Shelby

"Don't worry luv, we got you. Who do I gotta kill?"

Sophie Rundle as Ada Shelby

"You've always been there for me, of course I'll be here for you."

Helen McCrory as Polly Grey

"Us women are smarter. Now chin up, we have a job to do."

Chapter One

The air of Small Heath seemed to have a way of sticking to your skin or clothing. It left you feeling almost sticky and sweaty from the grim that would collect no matter how careful you chose to be. The people had grown used to such things and one could never be too precious about their clothing. Children seemed to run wild with their dogs and friends, men in the factories returning home covered in soot and the women trying to keep their homes cleaned to the best of their ability. Katherine Redwine had been brought up on Watery Lane and in her young mind, she believed that this was always going to be the case. “Kat, are you listening?” The annoyed voice of Ada rang through her ears pulling her attention away from the window. “Yes, of course. You were saying?” Katherine gave her friend a smile and lifted her cup of tea to her lips. It was rare that the two girls got moments like this and she didn’t mean to waste her time lost in the clouds. Ada watched Katherine with a sad smile of her own. Since the war Katherine hadn’t been the same, which she supposed was the common saying amongst the rest of the world. “I was saying that I think it is time that we get you back out there. You are a beautiful girl and I know anyone would be lucky to have you.” Ada leaned forward in her chair and crossed her ankles. “He wouldn’t want you to live like this. Pat-” “I’m alright I promise, I am just not ready. There’s still too much to do right now.” It wasn’t a complete lie. Since the men had come back home it had been a hard adjustment for her. First her brother had been killed and the man she had loved for most of her life had simply turned his back and had barely spoken a full sentence to her. And now that same man seemed to have found more trouble as if he had been fishing for it. Katherine shook her head placing the cup down back on the table giving the young Shelby woman’s hand a small squeeze. “But in the meantime I look forward to hearing all about how sweet and kind Freddie is.” At the mention of Freddie Thorne, Ada's cheeks began to flush, the usual reaction when the man was pulled into the conversation or whenever Ada told her friend of the latest escapades the two had gotten into. Katherine watched as Ada continued to talk about how much she loved Freddie and the latest times they had to meet up in secret, the forbidden romance felt like a dream she had had once. She had been so young when she first met him but those blue eyes of Thomas Shelby would forever haunt her. She was sure she would die with the image of his eyes, his smile permanently imprinted into her thoughts. She had been so angry with him, the sting of her slap across his face still stung her hand when she thought about it for too long. Of course when she had heard of what he found she wanted to try to knock some sense into him. 

And now she had a sinking feeling in her gut that felt like it was growing larger and larger each time she tried to swallow. Leave it to the most clever man she knew to bring down the eye of the government, the IRA, and god knows who else by finding and taking those guns. 

Thomas fucking Shelby. 

Those words rang in her mind when her man had told her, they rang when she confronted Charlie Strong and Curly. And once she had left Ada making her way down the street and heard of his stunt with the Chinese in a show to gather more bets. Any time she had tried to tell Thomas that he was getting into things he had no business doing, he would tell her that it “wasn’t women’s business” and would drop it at that, leaving Katherine to stare at him in a mix of frustration and continued heartache. 

Katherine began to make her way to the Garrison pub for her usual one drink with Harry giving a small nod and smile to the people she passed and in return would gain her own “Mrs. Shelby” greeting. She had grown numb to the nickname and had given up on correcting those that continued to use it and she decided to see it as a type of shield. No one fucked with the Peaky Blinders and the Shelby name went a long way in Small Heath. If Thomas had taught her anything it was to appear as calm and unbothered as possible when inside you just want to shoot something, or rather someone.

“Welcome in my lady, your usual?” Harry said, placing a glass down on the bar once Katherine had entered. She made her way to the middle of the bar and took her usual seat. “Yes please, Harry.” Katherine gave the older man a kind smile and glanced about the pub. The usual bar flies were about four glasses in and only acknowledged her with a simple nod or not at all. “How have you been Harry? Haven’t been given any trouble have you?”

“None, miss. Mostly the occasional drunkard fight but it ends well enough.” Harry placed the Irish whiskey down for the Redwine and leaned on the bar top. “You look as if you need a good drink and a good sleep.” Katherine huffed a laughed at her friend’s words and shrugged taking a sip from the amber liquid. “Don’t I always look this way?” She teased tilting her head. She had always enjoyed Harry’s company; he was kind in his own way and cared for the Garrison like it should have been. This was home and he had taken care of her when she had gotten so drunk she hadn’t been able to stand and he made sure that she would never reach that low again. He had made Katherine promise to not lose herself in her grief or heartbreak. He had been the father figure that she needed after Patrick had been killed. 

“Kat, don’t bullshit me.” Harry shook his head. Katherine spun her glass slightly, his gentle but stern tone was comforting in a sense. It was the same tone he had when he found her in the private room that Thomas always used. She had broken down and cried in Harry’s arms and was more whiskey than person and she was sure her breath could have caused an explosion if she lit a match. Earlier that day they had held a service for Patrick and it had really hit her that he was gone, her big brother, her protector was nowhere to be found. Just like her Tommy, sweet happy Tommy who was able to light up a room with his smile and whose laugh was contagious seemed to have died the same night. Harry had listened as she cried and mourned the lives lost and dreams that were crushed but once she was done he picked her up and helped her upstairs and cleaned her up and put her to bed. He had banned anyone giving her any kind of alcohol in the Garrison until she was able to function. He would be damned if the sweet girl turned into one of the men he served. “I’m fine Harry, I promise.” Katherine was touched as he watched her but before he could comment the doors to the Garrison were pushed open as the one man who she couldn’t stand walked through in the most attention way he could have. 

Fucking Thomas. 

(It will get better I promise but let me know what you think!)

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

Noticed something about zutarians: for people who claim to be "THE femist ship" they spend too much time praising Zuko for doing chores, being empathetic, supporting women and other stuff he didn't really do in canon all that much.

Like, feminists would consider these a basic level that any normal person, man or woman, should do for their own's sake without any praise. Oohing and aahing "look, he spends time with his own child!", "oh, you washed the dishes, my hero!", "where would I have been if you didn't do the laundry, my knight in shining armor, you really are a savior!" is... very sexist, actually! And zutarians do just that. It’s not enough for them to write him doing chores, they have to emphasize this, compare him to Aang/Sokka/anyone else who of course doesn’t do chores (because no one except Katara and Zuko ever does anything chorelike in these fics it seems), or just outright praise him for that.

Of course, zutara never was a feminist ship, so my observation doesn't add anything new. I understand that zutara kinda fits "female gaze" or whatever, though, it's a women's dream about a perfect partner, which is totally fine by itself – it just has nothing to do with Zuko (and, dare I say, Katara – I doubt she would be so ecstatic about a guy doing "women's chores", she is used to dividing the work around camp and takes it for granted). And that's why I cannot read even relatively harmless zutara fluff – it very often is very focused on this exact subject. I like Zuko for who he is and the truth is 1) he's flawed even after his redemption and 2) a huge part of how he sees himself is his prince title. Nothing of it matches zutara fantasy of a male housewife, so they have a whole other character named Zuko to fit into their imagination land, and I just have no interest in that.

I'm still impressed by that one fic (not in English) where Fantara was 100% sure that Fanfic-Firelord-Zuko will never ever "force any hapless woman" to take care of his newborn daughter (as opposed to her awful, awful husband, Fanfic-Aang who can't even feed his son, who's still eating only breast milk, for several days while Fantara decided to be away). Sure, girl, he's a fucking ruler, he has a whole country to think about, tons of very important shit to do every single day, a full palace of servants, of course he will always personally change diapers, no doubt. I bet he'll even do all the breastfeeding by himself, since his wife died at childbirth and forcing other women is out of the question.

I'm bitter now, and maybe taking it too far but what if – just "what if" – there are very few people who actually ship Katara and Zuko? Because it seems that most content creators in zutara fandom actually ship their two OCs who are very loosely based on these two characters (but don't I dare tell it to their faces, haha, they are under impression that their image of Zuko and Katara is somehow the only correct one).

Just one little disagreement: Zutara doesn't fit the Female Gaze because there's no such thing in the first place. There's not a single trope, way to direct a scene, or romance formula that universally appeals to women, and the same thing can appeal to different women for radically different reasons.

"Male Gaze" and "Female Gaze" were supposed to be a way to point out sexism (and sometimes straight up abuse) in film-making, but it honest God became some bullshit gender-essentialism nonsense REALLY fast. We gotta let that "That is for boys, this is for girls" mentality die.

Aang does chores with Katara. That is completely irrelevant to me shipping Kataang. Aang is not sexist. That doesn't even reach my top 50 reasons to love him as a character. Aang does a lot of things that don't match the idea I was raised to have of a "manly man" and I could not give less of fuck about it. It doesn't bother me, but doesn't particularly appeal to me either.

But for lots of people that is HUGE and some of the main reasons why they love his character and his romance with Katara. And notice I said people, not women.

I like plenty of enemies-to-lovers ships - I don't relate to a single meta/analysis I've ever seen of "Why women like bad boys/enemies to lovers/redeemed villains so much." It all rang hollow to me. But to plenty of women it hits the nail right on the head.

Hell, 50 Shades of Grey is a "romance/erotica" full of accidental misogyny, abuse-apologism, and slut-shaming yet the fanbase is 90% women from all kinds of demographics, and the main thing they praise about these goddamn books/movies is that it did NOT make them feel like they should be ashamed of wanting to have kinky sex with a hot guy.

The Female Gaze isn't real.

[allwormdiet]

Extermination 8.5

Skitter is now one for three on interacting with New Wave kids without making them hate her.

Also fun fact I actually hit the image limit while making this post so I had to nix a few of the smaller observations made, there's just that much shit going on

Neat to meet more of New Wave, but boy I wish it was under different circumstances

Also Taylor you were so close to making that descriptor of their anguish work, you shouldn't have acknowledged it

How fucking harrowing must it be to let your daughter go anywhere near the fucking thing that killed your son.

Also I like how even as Skitter realizes that this is not the time or place, she's still indignant at being called "the girl."

What an awful fucking day for all of them. What can even be done, what can even be said?

Just a wet fucking cat of a girl, being carried through the air.

Oh hey Coil, bet your asshole is clenching really fucking hard rn

I wish there was a way for Coil to drown down there without killing Dinah too, but alas

Also absolutely insane that this has all been in the span of, what, an hour? Maybe a little more? What the fuck

And here's Parian proving that she's actually a huge badass

"Why manipulate cloth" honestly my first assumption is that it's bc her power is cloth control

Really fucking funny that people apparently keep thinking that superpowers are magic, though

We hardly knew ye.

I did learn that this is a retcon; Browbeat survived in the initial version of the story, although he quit the Wards in the wake of this attack and never comes up again. The retcon was in... 2019? Reasoning is speculative but I guess people kept making stupid jokes about Browbeat and he got tired of it?

Hey you know what though, really good showing overall, better than a bunch of other capes today

Okay so did this attack go through Leviathan? What the fuck is going on with this Flechette girl, that is utterly fucking cracked. Armsmaster's fucking nanothorns couldn't hack that, what is she doing where her shots do this kinda damage.

Leviathan likes playing with its fucking food, which is weird as hell

This dramatic fucker

God that's so cool, just opening up a fucking chasm in the middle of the battlefield.

...I wonder if it was trying to get into the bunker like Coil was afraid of. I know enough about Noelle to know that could've gone really fucking poorly.

Laserdream is cool, does she get much love in the fandom or is she too peripheral a character for that?

This is kinda funny ngl

That's a lot of fucking dead people, Jesus H

Taylor you are genuinely being too cool about this, your arm is still broken

He can do anything he wants down there, it's terrifying

Very funny that Armsmaster's brand-spanking-new halberd is being put to better use in this fight by people who aren't him and for purposes he didn't intend

Haha, wuh oh!

First indicator that Coil's got some pretty remarkable commercial ties considering he managed to sneak his own fucking Endbringer shelter in for private use and nobody noticed.

Also, god that's gotta be fucking terrifying

...I think like 99% of things that have come up in this arc are fucking terrifying if we're being real for a second but I'm gonna keep saying it

Seeing someone who treats you like dirt and have a happy life outside of treating you like dirt is a certain kind of agony. Also fuck Gladly on principle tbh.

Ah fuck

She could have so easily given into spite and let them all suffer and die. She was under no obligation beyond her own drive to be good, to be better, to be better than Gladly. And that's why she's among the best of these fucking people.

And so the bug girl, both creepy AND wet, goes in there and saves everyone left standing by shoving the Halberd up Levi's nonexistent asshole and baiting him back out the shelter

She's a bigger hero than so many of the others

This might be one of the most intensely and personally terrifying moments of all. Paralysis and drowning hand in hand. A slow and insidious kind of horror.

Rachel Lindt MVP

Well hey, cool of Rachel to be concerned though

They should be giving Bitch the key to the fucking city for this, honestly

This poor girl sacrificed the closest thing she has to family to buy even a fraction of extra time for this asscrack of a city

And then there's this fucking asshole

Imagine if God thought you, personally and specifically, fucking sucked. What a weird feeling that must be.

Skipping past the downturn in the fighting and the teleportation bc we have to get to the conclusion of the chapter

Taylor did more to save this whole city than any of these people can even imagine, and they manhandle her into a cot and cuff her broken-ass arm because y'can't be too careful with villains, can you

This is going to go so poorly

Current Thoughts

Taylor did more, in the moment-to-moment breakdown of tracking, fighting, and responding to Leviathan, than like 90% of the other capes in this whole fucking deal, and nobody will ever know the full extent of it. She might have honestly saved more lives than Armsmaster, because he was too busy fucking grandstanding in the moments leading up to his, ahaha, disarmament.

Skitter is a hero, idgaf what anyone says. She earned better than what she's about to be fucking put through, that's for sure.

[enbypotat53]

OKAY so I just spent an hour collecting screenshots, time for the analysis!

(AS ALWAYS, MAJOR SPOILERS FOR INANIMATE INSANITY EPISODE 18 UNDER CUT!!!)

So I'll be tackling this like the episode 17 analysis, breaking it up into parts (except probably many, MANY more parts), but I'll start with Inanimate Island! (This won't be chronological, mostly just a by-area thing!)

And by god, do we start off strong. AN ANTHONY KOS SONG RIGHT OUT OF THE GATE?? HOLY SHIT.

Mephone thinking back on everything, his regrets about how he treated the contestants, his fears.. just. Wow. STRONG opening. (Also his little infodump to Mepad whilst they're still asleep/booting up, me too bud. Me too.)

Gotta admit I got choked up as soon as we started, both from built-up emotions whilst waiting, and just.. how powerful this was?? He cares SO damn much about the contestants, and Cobs destroyed EVERYTHING. This was his life, his escape (and we'll get to that later). Jesus, dude.

SPEAKING OF.

FUCK THIS GUY.

Holy SHIT did Joshua Waters do a phenominal job voicing him. I don't know if I've said it before but the II crew did SO good when they recast Cobs. Genuinely I don't think I could've asked for anyone better - you KNOW a VA is great when they can make you feel PHYSICAL RAGE just by saying their lines, y'know? When I first saw the trailer I had to actually take a break because I felt sick to my stomach just HEARING how this fuckass corn cob speaks to Mephone. His frequent infantalisation (both of Mephone, the contestants, the creatorbots, AND the viewers), and his manipulation, just.. eugh. He's probably the most well-written villain I've seen in a WHILE. AND HE'S SO PATHETIC?? He's a disgusting manchild who abuses his creations because it's the only semblance of power he'll get, and IT'S GREAT. I HATE HIM (/POS).

And ngl the self aware "it's good, just don't watch S1" gag made me choke on my lucozade, so thanks AE.

AND HOLY SHIT?? MEPHONE ACTUALLY FINDS HIS VOICE AND REBELS?? I'M SO PROUD OF HIM 😭💙

Again, more of Cobs being an asshole, but bless the Shimmers - they were so damn naïve, I'm glad they were warned and managed to get away, they just wanted their child back, man :(

NOW ONTO THE SCENE THAT MADE ME AUDIBLY SCREAM AND PUNCH MY BEDROOM WALL.

THEY KILLED MY BOY. MY BABY BOY.

Fun fact: I sent this message to a friend 2 hours before the episode dropped

Yeah I'm not okay.

Not gonna lie, I had a feeling it might've gone this way but I was PRAYING it didn't. Fuck, man.. Mepad is one of my absolute favourites for a multitude of reasons - he loves the contestants with all his heart, he'd do ANYTHING to protect them, and even though we could see how angry he was at Mephone in episode 17, he still gave his life to save him (and by extension, everyone else). He's a goddamn hero, but I wish he didn't have to die (and yes, I will be drawing fanart to cope). Glad he had a moment to be a badass though, Mepad is the living equivalent of "when the calm one gets mad, you know shit's about to hit the fan" and I love him for that 💙

ALSO LOOK HOW DISTRAUGHT TACO LOOKS?? MY BABY GIRL NO 😭😭😭

You could tell how much she cared about Mepad, and their friendship was SO important to me. I'll touch on this later but end song hurt my soul, ngl

AND WE OF COURSE HAVE COBS' DEATH.

So 10 image per post limit on the app fucked me over yet again, but I wanted to also briefly talk about Toilet so no popcorn image :(

I honestly think this death was so damn fitting for Cobs. It simultaneously feels dramatic, yet so utterly pathetic. It doesn't take itself too seriously, yet it's so built up and suspenseful - this is the moment we've ALL been waiting for. Seeing this bastard get his comeuppance. And to see his demise be a consequence of his vanity? He believed himself to be above everyone - he placed himself on a golden pedestal, thinking himself to be untouchable; he never would've believed he'd fall for such a simple illusion from "feeble minds", yet he did. He's a washed up old hack, through and through. All that grandeur? Just a façade. And honestly? The popcorn scene was so damn funny. Suitcase just casually offering Mephone a part of his father's cooked corpse had me cackling like a madman, it makes Cobs seem even more pathetic than he already was; reduced to a soft, delicate, utterly flavourless food that (if we're thinking about real-life movie theatres and how much popcorn people leave on the floor) is commonly stepped all over by everyone around. He remains in death how he always was in life.

(As always this'll be part one of the analysis, so strap in, folks! This'll be a long one!)

[tiredtriedfailures]

what are your favorite images/videos of kendrick? i mean obviously he’s always gorgeous but what pictures have you kicking your feet and blushing and twirling your hair ykwim

I WAS JUST LOOKING UP REF PICS WHEN I REMEMBERED I PLANNED TO ANSWER THIS BUT DIDNT IM SORRYYYYYY HERE WE GO

THIGHS. the way the clothes drape over him, this hairstyle, which will be shown more in more pics, and the lighting makes this pic a very good reference. dynamic.

love man-bun kennys man FUCK i miss long hair kenny like a motherfucker. lovely angle of his face, the pose is nice, the subtle bisexual lighting is always welcome, 10/10 no notes

damn i might be obsessed with man-bun kenny more than i knew my whole folder has lotsa these. he looked so good in LOYALTY tho didnt he. the romantic tension of that video really did grew on me with time.

2017 mtv kendrick i have feelings for you. mostly awe and envy but theyre still feelings come on

the layers the Neckerchief the braids he looks like the genius archeologist traveling to ancient ruins to solve a world ending problem in a movie

WOAH THIS IS ONE OF THE RARE ONES. SMALL BUN WITH SOME OF THE HAIR LET DOWN. damn does he look extra pretty here or am i just too kenpilled

does he look majestic or am i really too kenpilled. theres such royalty in him in this pic damn

cant lie this one is on here cuz beyonce adds such aura to this holy shit. im not even a beyhiver but this duo, damn. they ruled empires in the past

looks cute, dramatic lighting is nice, chest looks bomb

OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH THIS ONE. the shiny lips the pearls the scarf on the cap the earringgggg. AUGH AUGHHH

LOVE THIS ONE TOO. WHY DONT WE HAVE A PHOTOSHOOT OF THE MR MORALE HAIR WHY WHY WHYYYY

This fit and performance was so fire and IT was the reason i was knee deep in getty images btw. trying to gather all hq kendrick pics i could get my hands on for my Projects. the accessories, the clean suit...call this pic the YAWK YAWK YAWK YAWK the way im down

oh i have a few screenshots from the Jay Rock WOW cuz he was so gorgeous there. this time im not asking for confirmation, not doubting it, GORGEOUS. actually felt grief when i realized the looks from this video are not photographed, nor does he fuckin sit still in the video for a single sec for me to grab some good pics. if you wanna see my favorite kendrick videos just go to that one WOW edit hes. lord

i saved this twice cuz i like it so much. lil pirate. OH also i never mentioned but when hes adjusting his chain in N95 (? im p sure its it, black and white. idk) and he smiles kinda mischeviously, he reminds me of Jack Sparrow. just that 2 second snippet. just in there. its probably the close up beard and the air of playfulness idk

i told you i have more of these. and i still do im gatekeeping them. this one is so drawable tho god im getting the shakes the tingles. i just cant do em justice

this is from one of the silliest kendrick collabs, i talked about it before its Thats Me Right There where hes begging to hit like the worlds thirstiest man to a girl who sings all song about how ride or die she is to her guy. tragic, hilarious, i just paused IMMEDIATELY when this shot passed because of how beautiful his lips good. look. i mean how good they look. maybe i gotta go to sleep lamo am i yapping too much?

LMAO just WHAT are you wearing my guyyyy. the face and head are clear and the angle is interesting but what is that ATROCITY hes wearing lmaoooo. why did i save this. probably cuz of the expression, somewhere between a smile and curious look idk

okay okay thats all, i yapped long and hard, gave away most of my best pics. oh hey btw i hope tumblr doesnt mess with the quality cuz theyre all nice professional pics, from getty as mentioned lmao. sad we dont have the pics im constantly whining about, interesting clothes and angles, all sorts of facial expressions, showing off his face showing off his figure. so yeah. these are my faves, lemme know yours! dont gatekeep good pics from me what do you know i might actually draw kenny fanart if im inspired more than im scared

[puffyducks]

DCRC Week #8 (Part 1)

ODIN WEEK! ODIN WEEK! ODIN WEEK!!! It's PKNA #5: Portrait of the Hero as a Young Duck btw. Please enjoy my epic edit- I mean real panel I mean totally real screenshotted and unedited comic panel.

Also, I try to put spoilers for the comics I'm reading about as they happen in the story, but this time I couldn't help myself so beware of reading this if you haven't read the whole chapter yet.

I already have this panel saved in my folder, it's so iconic in my head. He wanna be Batman sooooo bad.

Gotta love these military guys opening fire like their lives depend on it and PK is just behind them making silly little jokes like :D

Wow this guy seems interesting I wonder what his opinions on AI art are

Gorgeous panel and some gorgeous one-point perspective here. Sorry for being an art student but we made a lot of drawings like this and it made me learn that drawing buildings makes me want to die. So this is even more impressive to me in that regard.

Lowkey cute asf for Odin to just put a whimsical little garden in place of where Ducklair tower used to be

Donald is so SAD it breaka my heart 💔 RIP Uno who is totally super dead 💔💔💔

Donald is SO SMALL. Shoutout to the PKNA writers for pushing the entire main Duckverse cast to the side so that they could create an all-new roster of characters that all fucking TOWER over Donald in height. Lyla, Angus, Xadhoom, Styvesant, soon to be Odin in like a few pages. If you need to know anything it's that Paperinik is a little SHRIMP and he is so tiny and small and the most specialest boy ever.

haha..... yeah..................

DEFEND UNO'S LEGACY DONALD!!!!! Also Lyla... okay and I guess Geena cause she's the ACTUAL robot he's defending-

This is the part where I look at the camera like it's an episode of The Office btw. If you know you know.

babygirl

OOOOH SHIT IT'S YA BOI!!! I forgot about him trying to meet Donald by just slamming his ship into theirs. Like I GUESS that's a surefire method to speak to someone...

Cheeky son of a-

GEENA YOU FUCKING NARC

Snitches get stitches Geena... (imagine a little text pops up on screen like in a video game and says "Geena will remember that")

Hmmmm where have I seen this shot before.... *flashback to issue #0.1 which I put a filter over to make sure you know it's a flashback to an earlier chapter*

oh right.

Crying over this shot they BOTH wanna be Batman man 😭 two dumdums that were made for each other

He's so cheeky I hate him (affectionate)

So obviously they bring up that Odin just means "One" (or Uno) but it's also worth pointing out what an Eidolon is. Eidolon is a Greek term, meaning "a spirit-image of a living or dead person; a shade or phantom look-alike of the human form" (at least according to Wikipedia).

"ODIN EIDOLON" LITERALLY TRANSLATES TO "UNO'S GHOST" I FUCKING HATE HIM. I'M SMASHING HIM WITH HAMMERS. AFFECTIONATELY.

Anyways to wrap up with some final thoughts-

Something that doesn't really get addressed in this comic (probably for plot reasons, it's not super relevant) is just how comforting it must be for Donald to travel to the future and see that the Evronian Empire is all but wiped out, a shell of its former self. Obviously timelines can still change, we saw that in Day of the Cold Sun, but it still must be nice to see that all the fighting he does is going to pay off in a big way.

Btw remember that bit in an earlier chapter about Uno finding Lyla attractive? Yeah well I should think so considering that YOU'RE THE ONE THAT BUILT HER- Okay well he's not the DESIGNER but still I think that connection is funny ok. I wonder if Uno scanned Odin's gun and was like "oh"

I like this comic, I think it's another really good one. I mean it's no Earthquake but still, between Day of the Cold Sun, Earthquake, and then this volume I feel like we've just had banger after banger after banger. I'm also super stoked to have Odin in the story now, even if thinking about Uno way outliving Donald and being excited to see him again after 200 years makes me really depressed if I think about it too hard. I'm happy that he got to escape the confines of Ducklair tower and even got a cunty green suit in the process though, good for him. Donald is REALLY gonna regret not accepting that explanation from Uno though, RIP 🙏 SUUURELY he'll figure it out one of these days guys. Like EVENTUALLY. Right???

[icebrooding]

A non-comprehensive first word-vomit of my thoughts abt Janthir wilds in non-chronological order:

Poky is my son and if anything happens to him I will commit Crimes of a very bad nature. I also called he and Braham would be great friends even before it got mentioned as a possibility right at the end.

I really like what they've done with the Warclaw; not only is the new skin extremely cute but I've been having so much fun w/ it's skills. Boing boing boing.

This soundtrack fucks REALLY hard??? Like holy shit??

Isgarren soft boy story reveal (but I already knew he was soft from SotO anyway but this is probably the most explicit we've had about just how soft--)

Greer is gonna have a lot of people horny for him, I can just kinda feel it? If people want to fuck the bog queen, I can imagine people also want to fuck the sexy-voiced Titan.

The 'boss segments' sure felt like boss segments, holy shit. I had no real issues on the first Greer and Decima fights but the one at the end actually caused me a lot of issues. Not sure how, but it did.

I really love the first half of the expac being this kind of 'low stakes' feeling adventure (and really FEELING like a good adventure, the way the maps are designed and their scale making exploring them SO good ouegh), and then the latter half is this slowly ramping 'oh fuck, Titans', culminating in 'oh fuck. /another/ titan.'

I somehow REALLY really appreciate the 'we cannot do this we need to retreat' stuff. I really liked the one at the end, the Commander's hesitance before calling off the pursuit. Feels like they've really learned over the years that rushing in isn't in their (or anyone's) best interest.

I genuinely always thought Sorrow was gonna be a polar bear. Did not expect a grizzly, but appreciate the subversion of my expectations. Even after her reveal I'd expected the lowland appearance to be an illusion of some kind, but nah. Girl straight up grizzly. Gotta respect.

On that note, I did have a joke going on for a few months of 'we walk into the lowland kodan lands and just find her sitting amongst them like 'oh shit'' so this was pleasant for me lmao.

Sincerely curious on how things will go between her and Isgarren after that little catfight. I don't wanna see Dagda crushed by losing her again :sadcat: She's like the kid caught between a really bad divorce--

Can Lyhr finally meet Rand again--

Can Stoic Alder be my new dad? And can he please not die I cannot bear (HAH) if anything happens to him either ; _ ;

where is zojja

Mildly upset that we're shown not to really remember Dagonet. I REMEMBER YOU, BIG BRO :crycat:

on that note did his voice get deeper

I feel like the horror of the White Mantle came across really strongly, as someone who (still, damnit) hasn't gone far in GW1, reading the notes around Syntri really painted a really gruesome and horrific image of the sentiments at the time... it was upsetting, to say the least.

Fuck? Ether towers and Jade Constructs though--

I would have appreciated any warning from my friend abt how going into the water of Syntri was like reliving my least favourite parts of Subnautica all over again.

I'm just gonna pretend we didn't talk to Anise at the end of the story LMFAO. I did not like that, honestly.

I KNOW HE WAS MENTIONED AGES BEFORE BUT ISN'T IT FUNNY HAHA IN SOME WAY THAT MABON, VOICED BY LIAM O'BRIEN, HAS AN ALIAS FUCKIN' NAMED "OBRYN"

spear aesthetic fucks even if i suck at it

Caithe getting to sit on the fireplace is iconic. queen behaviour

look, if we're (MAYBE) going to the domain of anguish (maybe isgarren can scream enough to open a portal again for us) then can we finally just bring legavo there and go ham? i'm sure it'll be fine.

more thoughts at another point when i can formulate sentences

[secertlymarkirl]

Just gotta say some things rn

      1. The Alex kister drama situation:

im just here to talk about the Alex drama that is happening rn I keep seeing people attacking Alex without knowing who is the real victim... You can't just blow up the target before knowing the truth behind... As you can tell Ven said in the doc that they are "a spy who came to destroy alex life" and that's a bit suspicious of someone to say that in the doc so you mean like you just came here to destroy alex career and life is that what you want?... If that so then you are a fucking monster Ven just gotta say it you're a horrible person who destroy people life and if you are one of their friends you should be ashamed of what they did

     2. The drama:

I have seen some people doing the fucking "grommer nae nae" trend with Alex and it's not funny and another thing saying "Alex in my new jail!" And putting him in a jail with a problematic people is not fucking funny ok you seriously not funny another thing when that goofy Russian person who just made a horrible Photoshop of Alex wearing a shit thing and saying "b-but I still call him a fembo-" your not cool for that do you like me calling you a brat when you don't want that mf stop being selfish 💀 

     3. exposed/doxxed:

buddy buddy do you really think that's a really good idea to do?... I don't fucking think it's cool to do that shit buddy exposing/ doxxing has family and dead grandpa or something is cool? You think it will make it not worse? No you litterly made it even worse then before he litterly got ghosted by DB and they we're a bad partner for him honestly what a horrible people....

     4. why Alex didn't mentions the other victims:

Bc they weren't that important DB and Ven are the most important people bc they are the reason that ruined Alex life and he had to mention some things about it and how they really didn't feel uncomfortable...like bro if you we're uncomfortable you can just say it and Alex will probably just fucking stop it don't you have mind you litterly said "no I'm fine with it I'm not uncomfortable!" DB said that to Alex and Ven when he self-haram you didn't actually care we know that

     5. Alex being racist but he's not:

Buddy please what the frick man? You litterly faked Alex being racist just for your goofy friend and do you think SORRY WILL litterly fix everything? No no no YOU RUIN IT EVEN MORE AND MAKE IT WORSE DUMMY Alex never said racist things to Andrew and you litterly saying I'm the doc "I don't have proof" but guess what some people actually believe that shit like what THERE WAS LITTERLY NO PROOF???? 

     6. why the doc is fake:

ok here is why the doc is fake just honestly Ven had just faked some images and times and hopefully there were some people who find out about it don't think your not in w big trouble Ven you in a worse trouble rn your just a coward Ven and you you know that

    7. More drama:

"quite saying Alex is innocent!" "Alex is not fully innocen-" ok buddy we know Alex is not fully innocent but what the hell you want else "you can't forgive him ye-" buddy please stop this is not about you some people can forgive him and some people not but now he turned out to be innocent and guilty and he's now the real victim here he have been doxxed/ghosted/exposed/people send him death threats/all the actors left him just for what? For a fucking relationship drama like what else you want you want him to go to Ven house and beg for apologize what's wrong with you... "I will support Alex victims until I di-" who cares if you die it's not like the victims will care if you support them bc they just want attention

     8. Problematic/grommer:

do you guys remember when Ven said that Alex is a grommer and a pedophile? Well he's not actually vent has deleted the post they made on tumble like it was nothing and then apologize for calling Alex a grommer and saying "we never mean Alex being grommer or pedophile" then why you said in the doc that he is pedo and manipulate then it turns out he's not? Crazy Ven you know people have fall for that shit weirdo

- I just  want this drama to end already and idc if you attack me it's not like I'm the only person who is on Alex side mf I ain't scared of no shit let us have the fun we always do I feel like this year destroy everything I hole everything get back to normal again

[generouskittentidalwave]

I HAVE A BONE TO PICK WITH THE KUNG FU PANDA SERIES, I'M GRABBING IT BY THE THROAT AND DRAGGING IT TO THE DEPTHS

JUST COME'RE, COME'RE FOR A MINUTE AND EXPLAIN TO ME

WHAT. THE FUCK. IS THIS?

This has GOTTA be another Macaque disguise in order to mess with Wukong's image cause I refuse to believe that THIS is Wukong.

Now don't get me wrong there is nothing wrong with adaptions made of our beloved monkey gremlin, a lot of them are super cool and well made! But there is a difference between an adaption and then just full on disgracing the source material BECAUSE HOW CAN ONE FUCK UP THIS BADLY ON SUCH A WELL KNOWN AND BELOVED CHARACTER? OKAY SIT DOWN FOR CLASS TIME AND LET ME STATE MY CASE.

First of all the looks, why is only one eye red and gold? I'm sorry but if I remember correctly Wukong wasn't half way in the furnace. My second gripe is with the monkey species they chose for him. Listen, Wukong is supposed to be the representation and embodiment of a monkey, he isn't supposed to be a specific species of monkey in the first place as he is not only his own species of monkey but he is supposed to represent all the monkey species. So making him into a specific species of monkey doesn't work all that well in the first place, but out of all the species they could've picked why the species that looks like a reverse oompa loompa?

AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON HIS POWERS

Okay okay, get this, not only did they heavily nerf him, but they also made it so all his power comes from THE GOLDEN CIRCLET. YEAH THAT'S RIGHT THEY MADE THE TRAUMA RING AROUND HIS HEAD INTO A CROWN THAT GIVES HIM POWERS AND THAT HE WANTS TO GET THE CROWN BACK.

The crown is most known for being the equivalent of a shock collar for him, how do you mess that one up THAT BAD?

And we haven't even touched on his backstory yet oh no no no no. Sit down as you are gonna LOVE this one folks

Apparently Wukong was great friends with the gods in heaven until he was framed for something he didn't do and was imprisoned, not in the mountains by the Buddha, but was imprisoned in the red jade mines for it. Not only that but he basically poisoned Po and his trainees as he could only get out if he replaced himself in the mines with another and keep them there until like sunset. First of all Wukong would never do that in the first place sure he was impulsive and reckless but he wasn't bad for the sake of being bad, he was just a bit of a trouble maker that needed proper guidance. NOT ONLY THAT BUT PO'S TRAINEES WHO ARE LITERALLY KIDS BEAT HIM. LIKE- HELLO? LITERAL KIDS BEAT SUN WUKONG? THE MOST OP CHARACTER IN KNOWN HISTORY?

Apparently the ldb was the one behind things and Wukong needed to stop her which we saw that be done much better in Lego Monkie Kid (amazing show I HIGHLY recommend watching that instead of this). And Wukong redeemed himself and became besties with the gods again.

OH OH AND TO ADD MORE SALT TO THE WOUND? MONKEY'S BROTHER IN KFP IS NAMED "WU KONG", THE SAME BROTHER WHO CAUSED THEIR OWN MOM TO DIE DUE TO HIS OWN SELFISHNESS.

LIKE BRO WTF DO THEY HAVE AGAINST WUKONG? WHY ALL THE BEEF AGAINST SUCH A BELOVED AND AMAZING CHARACTER AND MAKING HIM OUT TO BE A HORRIBLE AND PATHETIC GUY WHEN HE ISN'T?

Kung Fu Panda is beloved by China for it's good representation and understanding of it's culture, so how the franchise could let one of the most well known characters in Chinese mythology and stories get slanderized THIS BADLY by one of their spin off series is beyond me.

I know this has just been me ranting about how a recurring character in a series was characterized in a spin off series kid show people hardly know about but like- for some reason I was just absolutely flabbergasted by this characterization of Wukong as a whole in a franchise that's known for doing plenty of good research on chinese culture, mythology, belief and stories. My only hope is that this was Macaque disguised as a fake Wukong the whole time just pulling a funny prank.

[ottpopfic]

It's not the first time Nico has had to turn their ass back around the way they came because they fucked some underworld something in what di Angelo has dubbed their ‘Gay Chicken On Steroids Quest’. He's equally pissed at both Leo and Jason every time, so Leo tries to take some solace in that

Like, hooray Leo we‘re glad you're back, go back from whence you came we gotta go close the hole you crawled out of or whatever

---

The last death

-

Leo is alive, again, for like the sixth time 

Something something Jason went off to gather parts of all the plants people have been turned into to make a sacrifice? Dr. Frankenbonsi a Leo? He's not sure, all he knows is he got spat out of Thalia’s tree and it was both gross and hella painful. Not the worst resurrection so far, but definitely the one with the most tree sap

Also, Nico’s pissed again that they fucked around too much. Whatever Jason did with his spooky tree thing has apparently made a weak spot for underworld magic and now they have to go close it 

It's not the first time Nico has had to turn their ass back around the way they came because they fucked some underworld something in what di Angelo has dubbed their ‘Gay Chicken On Steroids Quest’. He's equally pissed at both Leo and Jason every time, so Leo tries to take some solace in that

Like, hooray Leo we‘re glad you're back, go back from whence you came we gotta go close the hole you crawled out of or whatever

The issue this time isn't how Leo came back, but the fucking cultist that have taken over the spot Jason did his Zuse wood magic thing

They end up in Newport State Park near the tippy-top point of Wisconsin’s peninsula, in a clearing in a grove of Oak and Linden trees. The place has to be hidden by the mist, Leo has checked the satellite imaging on Google Maps multiple times as they trek through the trees and underbrush to see nothing out of the ordinary, or even a landmark. There's some kind of temple off up a hill with way too many Canadian Geese guarding it, but that's not what they're after 

What they are after is the lowlands under the temple where the earth was carved away by an ancient flood. The trees never grew back there, leaving room for the milkweed, cardinal flowers, and forget-me-nots to flourish under the sun. It would be a lovely sight, if the flowers hadn't been trampled by the cultists

Fucking cultists, they're digging a hole

“What's with the hole?” Piper asks. The three of them are up in the brush at the top of the hill across from the temple, watching the robed dudes down below and desperately avoiding the geese. 

“Fuck if I know” Nico monotones

“Dude, you're the whole reason we're here,” Leo gapes “How do you not know what's up with the hole?”

“Just because I know that cultists are fucking around doesn't mean I know the method to their madness” Nico grouches 

“Oh no wait I think they're planting that guy,” Piper identifies “Or burying him alive? Whatever there's a dude going in the hole”

“Yeah, looks like it's time to step in,” Nico tosses the binoculars back at Leo to stash in his tool belt and draws his spooky-ass sword “Whatever you do don't bother the geese, I think they are only here for the temple”

“There is no way in hell I'm fucking with a goose,” Leo relents, tucking everything away “Have you ever been one on one with a goose, because I have”

“Oh yeah same,” Nico shudders “I got chased by like four of them when I was homeless in Central Park”

“Fucking vicious right!?” 

“Yeah, if I didn't know better I'd say they were hell spawn”

“Is there a plan?” Piper cuts in before they start down what she calls ‘sad homeless orphan lamentations’

“Keep the cult from burying anyone, don't die,” Nico tells them “I can close the weak point once we clear them out”

“Fantastic,” Piper says 

They end up splitting up slightly, being outnumbered puts a damper on charging in even if it looks mostly like mortals below. Nico poofs off one way whereas Leo and Piper sneak off the other, it works for about eight seconds before they are spotted in the wildflowers 

“You there!” cries one of the cultists pointing “Show yourself!“

“What is he a fucking Monty Python character” Piper grumps

“Hello!” Leo improvises, standing abruptly “Hello fellow cult members, I have come to uh, help you with the cult stuff” Leo can see Nico facepalm in a patch of swamp lupine on the other side of the hill

“Yep sure do love digging holes and putting people in them, uh” Leo is apparently now the distraction because Piper is lining up her blow dart as his hip and Nico is creeping in from the back “Sure am excited using a whole ass man as a seed, that's definitely gonna appease our god!”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” cuts in one of the cult guys in the back, Piper blow darts him two seconds later

Things go fast from there. There are six above-ground cult members and one fancy one in the hole, Nico quickly takes out the one next to Mr. Blow Dart In The Neck. Leo pulls a handsaw and a ball peen hammer out of his belt, whipping the hammer at the closest robed figure and following a knife-wielding Piper into the fray 

It's the classic chaos of a close combat fight; dodge, duck, swipe at a weak spot, and don't hit your friends. They're holding their own pretty well for being outnumbered in a goose poop-filled muddy clearing. But it's when Leo turns to throw another hammer at the man starting to overpower Piper that he hears a new voice enter the equation

“Leo!”

And there he is, it's Jason. 

He's alive, walking talking breathing moving of his own accord. Or he would be, if the knife that was meant for Leo wasn't sticking out of his back

Leo hasn't seen him in three years . 

“Jason?”

They lock eyes for a second, blue to brown, and then Jason gives one hard bloody cough. Leo can see the tip of the knife just piercing through his shirt, the smallest hit of silver surrounded by spreading red

“ Jason !”

The Hole Cultist pulls his blade up first, making a sick crunching and ripping noise accompanied by Jason’s cut-off scream, before wrenching it back out and kicking the blond away. Jason falls hard, and he stays down, the robed man turning back to his original target of Leo with a sneer. There is a lot of blood, like the knife went through a major artery or organs or something, pooling around where Jason lays barely moving, it makes Leo see red

He tends not to be the one fighting in the front lines, especially not with his fire. Like Leo can defend himself and others if he needs to, but he much prefers to launch wrenches at people like Ratchet from Transformers or act as a support. Fire is too hard to control in close or crowded combat, and there is too high a risk of hurting someone friendly or catching the landscape ablaze

Leo doesn't really care about that right now, his body moves on its own

Charbroiled he thinks the term is, or at least extra crispy, because for once Leo is not holding back. That tight panicked control he's had to keep on his fire his whole life whips away from him in a flash of light and heat at the cultist, a Saturn's rings of flame surrounding him and then projected at the man. Either way, there's not much left of them when he's done, half the flesh seared off the bone and all

“Jason!” Leo screams as he turns back, scrambling away from the horror show he's made of the robed figure and sliding on his hands and knees next to the blond. He gathers Jason into his arms and onto his lap, not caring for the blood and viscera that are coating them both, Jason grabs him back with shaking hands the best he can “ Jason !”

“O-oh hey,” Jason says like he's not actively bleeding out “It's good to see you”

“Jason, what the fuck” Leo cries, vision blurring with the water in his eyes “Don't do this to me!”

“It’s okay,” Jason tries to soothe him through the blood in his mouth, gore-slick hands losing their grip on Leo’s jacket and looking straight into Leo’s eyes like a promise “I'll get you on-on the n-next round, just-just wait, for me” and then he's gone, the light leaving him In one last desperate rasping breath

“No no no nonono no! ” Leo begs through his tears, shaking him in his arms like it will make Jason’s spirit come back to his body “Jason come on please! ”

It's not fair, he's right here and it's not fair . They were so close, Leo can feel how close they were to making it

He's on fire, he knows he is but he doesn't have it in him to care. It's whipping around like a storm, like a tornado, pouring off of him harder and hotter than it's ever been, the heat making Jason's body slowly cremate in his arms. All Leo can do is burn and sob, hunched over what's left of the man he's so desperate for even as other things around them catch with him

It's not fair, they were so close and it's not fair

Leo is done. He's played by the rules and bent over backwards to appease the gods and this is what they get? They were never going to let Leo have him, it's always been just a show, just another stupid myth to add to the collection. Here's a parable on what wanting what you can't have will do to you, it is storm or fire after all

Leo is over it, he's going to write his own story

He can hear Piper’s panicked voice somewhere off somewhere, but he can't find it in him to care for once. If he's going to die this time for this at least she won't be there like all the other deaths. Maybe she can be spared for once

It's hot, his fire, so hot for once it's blue. Jason’s body might be dust slipping through his hands but Leo knows without needing to look it's the same color as his eyes

So he hulls himself up. He's still burning, the ash that is Jason combining with the ash and stone that is the landscape and changing. Magma, lava, stone and glass. 

Obsidian 

Leo walks 

And the ground melts away

He walks the whole way down like that, all the way to the underworld. Nothing stops him, not the earth or spirits or monsters, nothing even tries. He creates his own tunnel like that, burning his entrance to the upside down, an Obsidian Field

He may not be falling into the planet, but it sure is close

Leo doesn't waste time when he gets to the upside down, beelining it to the queue of souls waiting to be judged, honed in on the blond like he's being reeled in by the heartstrings. He's terrified, he's breaking so many rules, but he can't care about that right now. He won't care about it. If they want to strike him down for this Leo can just step in behind Jason, he's not above cutting in line.

It doesn't take Leo long to find him, in the long procession of semi-transparent dead people Jason is surprisingly opaque. He has a hand in his grody ripped jeans pockets and staring at an outcropping of stalagmites like a crappy waiting room TV. The microsecond Leo is close enough he grabs him out of line by the hand, Jason looks surprised to see him so soon

“We are leaving ” Leo demands through his teeth

“Okay,” Jason says, and then Leo drags him back the way he came

He doesn't let go of Jason's hand the whole way up, but he doesn't look at him either, just in case.

When they get upstairs the land around them is one big sheet of black glass with the hole to the new underworld entrance smack dab in the middle. there's a spot in front of them, where the new stone is discolored and rippled like water. Where Jason died, where Leo caught fire. It’s kinda pretty in a way, glittering and reflective, but nothing looks better than turning around and Jason still being there

“Hi,” Jason says, a huge grin on his face

“Hey,” Leo breathes back, still terrified their both about to be whisked away back under

“I missed you,” Jason tells him, squeezing his hand

“ Dude ” Leo is trembling, is this really happening?

“Just, come here ”

Jason pulls him into an embrace by their joined hands, and Leo melts into it holding him back like a lifeline. 

It's probably the best hug in existence Leo thinks, even though it's one-armed and they are both hella gross. But it's Jason , and he's here. He's here and he's sticking his stupid handsome face in Leo’s hair and pulling him in so tight it makes his ribs hurt. Leo thought he had run out of tears somewhere between the Metamorphic Rocks and the Mantle, but apparently not. He's sobbing into Jason’s nasty ass shirt, and Jason lets go of his hand just to hold him tighter

“Holy shit!” Leo hears Piper shreek in the distance “Holy shit he did it! ”

There's more screaming, the sound of friends and family inbound across the still-steaming ground, but right now it's just Leo and Jason standing in the cooling obsidian 

Leo looks up at him, just to make sure it's true and Jason is here for realzies this time. He's met with blue eyes, blue like the sky above them clear of clouds, blue like the heart of the hottest flames, blue like home

“Let's go home,” Leo tells him

“Okay,” Jason replies, seconds before Piper body slams them both to the ground “Let's go home”

---

@queenjunothegreat

[delta-rex]

Tell me about the horses

OK FINALLY I CAN ANSWER THIS.

so. this is going to be Long cause im boutta copy and paste the entire lore and also the images from my friends discord channel

yeah so the idea started bc my friend and i were like zamn ok. what if we had gay cowboys and then the braincell went BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR and i accidentlly invented an entire planet and ecosystem just to fit in some wacky alien horses. i have problems disease.

aNYWAYS so the planet itself is more or less a pangea-like construction, there's bascially just one continent bc i dont LIKE continental drift its MEAN and RUDE and messes up EVERYTHING.

the planet is farther away from its sun than earth / the sun is weaker, so it's generally much colder (like 30-40F year round bc i forgot how celsius works oops). still 100% livable for humans (so therefore colonized asap), but kinda cold ish so.

this climate is still pretty prime for grasslands- therefore alien HONSE bc i do what i want. btw. the honses are BIG boyes. like avg is a large van/small moving truck. theyre big.

the grasslands are home to a fairly complex ecosystem but we don't care aobut that, just the fact that there are decently sized predators that live in the long grasses (max size, toyota corolla or smaller). however theyre big enough that most cities, instead of bothering to settle down on the ground and have to build substantial defenses against these predator packs, just went 'hmm there's a solution to this, and this solution is GIANT ASS HOVERCRAFTS THE SIZE OF CITIES.' and so they rolled the fuck with it.

the problem with these is that not only to they have to be guarded from the grassland predators... there are also ALPHA predators. basically these are ultra mega insanely large creatures that roam the supercontinent, and they all are pretty much in agreement that a floating hovercraft city makes a nice healthy breakfast, however they HATE eating the honses as they're toxic to the alpha predators. so, the colonizing humans looked at em and went 'WHAT IF WE HAD MORE!!!' so now, every city has a giant herd of at least 30+ horses, and bigger cities can ahve up to 50.

no horses? you die! no hovercraft? you die!

orgot to mention the planet has no seasonal tilt lol, there's also some forest around the eqator where it's warmest, and the day is like 15/20 hours long yeah

yeah so. an entire fucking planet i invented just for some gay cowboys. 'wow rex' you say 'thats kind of excessive' oh just wait i did MORE

SO. despite there not being much precipitaion, everyone wears ponchos because changing outfits is hard and you NEVER get off the horse. ever. so you gotta carry it with you and i sure wouldnt want to carry more than like 2 outfits at a time. ponchos are practical solutions to every outfit problem ever

being a cowboy or the equivalent title is however really really prestigious, as theyre basically the ones keeping you and all the people you know alive so like you kinda want those yknow. you kinda get a free pass with everything in the city in your off season

(year is more or less the same by our reckoning, so most people would spend like 4-6 months escorting around the city, then 6-8 resting and doing stuff up top. some people train new horses full-time, but they don't usually escort full-time)

people who work on the fusion cores and propulsion systems also get similar treatment for bascially the same reason and ofc in the city people have all the usual jobs that you need to keep stuff running but yeah

cowbooys are just normal ass people. like humans. yeah the focus is the honses sorry i do waht i want

honse colors include but are not limited to normal horse colors and patterns, so while buckskin, bay, and grey are all common if your horse blue go tf off we love to see it

there's more lore about the actual gay cowboys and their horses also but the worldbuilding is the fun part in my opinion tbh.

images:

honse portrait

long boy

anatomy struggle

view from hovercraft

school project I did (patterns are part of the project but shapes are correct)

[kubrik-was-a-c-nt]

Finally watching Spiral! Considering I spend a lot of time thinking about the Saw series I should have watched this a long time ago.

Onto reactions!

Ew, the two things I hate most: sewers, and public port-a-potties. I loath using port-a-potties.

Oooh, updated realistic pig mask! I like!

Ah, the tongue trap I've seen in so many thumbnails. It's even worse when you see hes hanging by his tongue over some kind of flimsy little stool.

Going back to the old box TVs? Must have raided a goodwill.

New voice sounds weird, not sure if I'm okay with it. You'll see.

Okay, pretty iconic sequence right off the bat. Super uncomfortable looking trap, good buildup, lots of blood. A real saw movie.

My rebuttal to Chris Rock's rant about Forrest Gump is that Jenny did not ask Forrest to do any of that and... oh shit, it's the po-po. But I guessed Rock was a cop from the promotional material but this was a good reveal.

So 12 years ago was the Saw 6 and 7 era. That was a time where people would have wanted dirty cops turned in. Hoffman was on a fucking killing spree, gotta nip them in the bud.

It's nice to know that if my dead body was ever found, the cops would immediately take me seriously because my fitbit would tell them that I'm not unhoused.

Jigsaw used an old ass tv in the trap but a USB stick for the video. I guess it's near impossible to find any tapes or tape players.

Putting bad cops in traps... I like this.

That box that guys tongue, isnt it? Yep.

"Damn n**** wash your hands" she told him to get out, he can use hand sanitizer.

Wow, such realism. Someone turns in a cop doing bad things and now they're the bad guy. It's almost like the cops are protecting bad cops.

Is this the first time we meet a victims wife or family member after their death? No one usually gives a shit about them. Good expansion.

"I heard about Boz. You alright?" "No, I'm all fucked up". First time I've seen someone fully admit to being distraught over the death of a friend.

"Dont drain my battery watching Twilight" what is this, 2009??? Wait, is this 2009?! Is this like Jigsaw where- oh wait, they just showed them with smartphones, my bad.

I forgot to turn in subtitles, they make watching movies so much easier for me. And now I can spell everyones names right.

You're looking for a copycat of Jigsaw, the guy who kidnaps and tortures 'bad' people, and you walk into an abandoned building alone? You deserve to die now. The message from earlier even specified that they were going after crooked cops.

Oooh, this trap looks interesting. I havent seen any images of it before.

Zeke, stop trying to ruin other peoples marriages. Not everyone needs to be as miserable as you.

Tip your delivery driver!

DONT FUCKING TOUCH THE BOX AND USB BOX WITHOUT GLOVES. ITS FUCKING EVIDENCE.

I see, the pig theme is being used to mock the police here.

TOUCHING EVIDENCE WITHOUT GLOVES. AGAIN.

OH NOW YOU PUT THEM ON

And now I see it, all the cops that hate Zeke are also bad cops. It's almost like the force is full of bad cops and when the one good cop turns one in, they get ostracized.

I'm trying to see the point of the cage on Fitch's head. Maybe to keep him from chewing through the wires around his fingers.

I know someone who almost lost her finger during an archaeological dig. An accident with a sawhorse I think. She still can't watch hand trauma scenes.

"John Kramer didn't target cops" Eric Matthews, Rigg, Straum, Perez, Carrie... Hoffman only got involved because of his fake trap.

Okay, what is Banks Sr out doing?

ZEKE! GLOVES!

Dont you have bomb sniffing dogs? Have one take a whiff, easy.

It's the skin from someones head- SCHENK. I LIKED YOU.

Wait, theres always a mole in these movies, someone on the inside pulling strings. Schenk is new, too new to have done anything too corrupt. The only way to positively identify the body would be with dental records. That might take a minute to obtain and analyze.

Okay, I may have seen a small spoiler a few months ago about who is the mole, but I cant positively remember if it was Schenk or not.

They must be raiding antique stores now to get these tape players.

'Sever your spine or get covered in hot wax'? Really thinking outside the box here.

One killer to make a diversion, one to trap Angie? Banks Sr and Schenk working together?

I'm going to be totally wrong and suckerpunched out of left field, arent I?

Yes, he is too close to this. He needs to be taken off the case and given a horse tranquilizer.

WAIT THE FIRST SMARTPHONES CAME OUT IN 2007. THIS COULD BE 2009. I forgot to pay attention to anything that could date the time period.

Banks Sr walked into that one... literally.

As a cop, you should be trained to pick a handcuffs lock, just because. Oh wait, do you know how to pick handcuffs? Holy shit, you have a useful skill.

Oh, hi Pete. I guess someone stole Pete's badge and password to erase the footage. Zeke should have realized that Pete would not have walked into the police station with everyone knowing who he is.

I guess we are in a recycling plant?

Zeke just jumps in and starts helping. See, Jeff? I mean, Pete is bleeding out the mouth so hes 100% dead but Zeke did his best.

Yay, Schenk is alive!

CHARLIE

Wait, wouldnt they have noticed that the tattoo was fresh? Fresh tattoos look different from healed ones. Schenk's tattoo is healed and old.

You know you die waaaaay before all 1.5 gallons are drained.

HE MADE HIM INTO A PUPPET

Oh hey, this was Bousman? Nice to see you back in the saddle. Great quality work this time.

Holy shit, I'm feeling super emotional. Great use of the Saw theme at the end there, great payoff to everything. I literally said 'pulling the strings' earlier without realizing how true it is.

I say this is a great offshoot to the Saw storyline. John Kramer is not involved, he only inspired the killing spree. The title is great because Schenk leaned into the spiral motif to emphasize a symbol used by Jigsaw that was not Billy. 'From the book of Saw' is giving me 'Cult of John Kramer' vibes, which I like. It shows how he was so influential as a serial killer who targeted 'bad' people in an attempt to reform them that other people began to copy him. I can see so many others trying to be the next Jigsaw. Of course, Schenk did all of this for personal reasons to seek revenge. Besides Cecil, Kramer actually wanted people to survive and be reformed. I dont think Hoffman cared if people won or lost, but he still made all the traps survivable. One step up from Amanda.

I'm now super interested to see where Saw X takes us. Saw in spaaaaace? Smashing someones face with liquid nitrogen? Uber-Jason?

[popculturebuffet]

Pirate Week: Jack of All Trades Floundering Father and Shark Bait Reviews: Bizzaro Blackbeard (Comissoned by Weirdkev27)

Ahoy me hearties and welcome back to Pirate.. two consecutive days. Today we look at one of the most infamous scourges to ever sail the seven seas, Blackbeard!

No not that one.

Sadly not him either. I gotta get back to that series sometime. Maybe next month. No instead of talking about the good blackbeards we're talking about the version from Jack of All Trades.

Before we can get into this disapointment, let's talk about the show itself.

Jack of All Trades was syndicated show in 2000, lasting for two seasons (one 16 episodes the other 8) and part of the back2back action hour with Cleopatra 2525, about an exotic dancer who gets put in cryo sleep and winds up leading a revolution against robots.

Like Cleopatra 2525, Jack of All Trades likely would've been lost ot the sands of time were it not for one man, it's star, your surrogate uncle and mine, the man the myth the chin BRUCE MOTHERFUCKING CAMPBELL. Kev seems determined to one day have me review everything bruce has been in.. which will probably include mchale's navy by the end

For now though this is the good stuff, as jack was also executive produced by Bruce's ride or die best buddies Robert Tapert and Sam Rami.

Jack follows Jack Styles, america revolutionary war hero and either ash williams great great great great great grandpa.. or possibly a time lost Ash Williams who became his own grandpa Phillip J Fry style. The world will never know.. until Dynamite FINALLY does a crossover for it. Come on guys. It's fish in a barrel. Kev even pitched the crossover to me: Ash goes back in time and has to team up with Jack to stop Napoleon from getting his hands on the necronomicon.

Anyways back to the premise: Jack is tapped by president jefferson to go to the french ruled island of Pualu-Pualu in the east indies and stop the various plots of the french. His contact, partner and object of romantic tension is british scientest Emilia Rothschild, played by Angela Dotchin. Jack masquerades as Emilia's houseboy, then goes into actoin as the Darring Dragoon. Yes folks this is also basically a superhero show. The two frequently foil the local Govenor Croque, ocasionally napoleon himself.. and hilariously enough often also scheme to keep Croque in power as his incompetence makes their jobs easier than if Napoleon sent people with actual talent. It's both a great setup and a purposfully thin one: within this the duo can do just about any nonsense the writers want. This includes, just from wikipedia episode blurbs: Jack having to beat Napoleon in poker to keep the louisana purchase, help croque fuck his wife better, get cathrine the great her horse back so she dosen't blow up the island, and get amnesia via a pig. The show is really just an excuse for slapstick nonsense, wordplay, our two leads to banter, and for every man on the island to hit on amelia to remind you this show was made in 2000 and everybody was super extra triple horned up those days. So how did my first round of getting to know jack pan out? Why does this blackbeard suck so much? How does leonardo divinci factor into all of this? Join me under the cut to find out.

The Floundering Father: This episode SHOULD have been an easy slam dunk. I mean look at the image I chose. Really look at it. It has Bruce Campbell in an old timey sleeping outfit. Bruce Campbell, already in his pajamas. That visual gag alone should've won this 29 emmys.

But.. the rest of the episode simply dosen't live up to that glorious image you see. It's main problem is it's running gag for the episode: Jack and Emilia bicker about which is better, America or England. Which is laughable today as while I love my country, we've got a dumptruck load of problems.. and so does the uk. It dosen't work character wise because while I get this show is over the top and what not, I do... it dosen't paint the best picture of emilia that she's overdefnding a country that till very recently opressed Jack's country. I get it's her homeland and the man later says he wishes he could put her boobs on a teddy bear

But it's still pretty tone deaf to tell your partner "Golly the people who opressed yours you had to fight to get away from sure are great". I'd be able to overlook it.. if it was funny. Instead it's just every two minutes or so "AMERICA GREAT" "NO BRITAN" "AMERICA" "BRITANNNN" "AMERICAAAAAAA FUCK YEAH " "BRITAN FUCK YEAH " "mericamericaMERICACAAAAA" "BRITANBRITANJOLLYGOODPIPIPBRITAN"

It drags down the episode every. fucking time. And this being the first jack of all trades I saw had me worried their like this EVERY TIME. Thankfully the next ep, which we'll get to shortly, settled more into the two just bantering and nicely complimenting each other as a team: emilia is the brains and creates vehicles and inventions and such to help them, while jack is the more wordly brawn, able to use his fists and spycraft while loudly complaning and making puns and what not. They have way more chemistry there then here where it just gives me a migraine.

That said it's not ALL their fault the episodes a bit of a slog. Mostly but still Blackbeard dosen't help. Blackbeard is played by Hori Aphene here and credit to the show for casting a POC actor. I didn't even know historical blackbeard wasn't white till our flag means death. The character himself is just .. mostly shouting and being gross.

God bless HOri he's trying really hard, it's the writing that lets him down. I will give this version points for breathing fire

but all the shouting in the world can't make this character funny, threatning or remotely intresting and it only gets worse next episode.

The combo of the lackluster guest star and bickering just makes this one a chore to get through but there are SOME bright spots of light. Croque and his minon, Brogard, pull a clever plan, having Brogard take Benjamin's franklin's place as hostage.

The main saving grace of this episode though is Benjy himself: for starters he's kindapped for the most gloriously stupid reason imaginable: Napoleon wants to force him to build a super weapon to destroy the white house. That itself would be good.. but what takes it over the top and really told me what this show true form is.... the weapon is a GIANT KITE. Yes they took the one thing any person knows about ben franklin and made it into a doomsday device. I fucking love everything about this. This alone got my interest back.

Ben Himself is just a lot of fun. While some of the jokes are just him eating a lot aka

Outside of that he's great, and his little mentorship with elizabeth, both being in awe of her designs and helping her figure out why her sub's engine's not working is genius. Elizabeth's submarine itself looks great. The climax.. is also a lot of fun. The Dragoon battles blackbeard while as Jack he eventually has to hold two wires together and gets after effects lightninged all over. It's wonderfully dumb.

All in all this episode is just..

Has some highlights towards the end but most of the first two acts are a slog. Thankfully the next one's MOSTLY better.

Shark Bait

This one is better... though just to get it out of the way blackbeard is far worse. While he wasn't great in the first, the pirate ship was at least fun for a climax and he had the delightfully insane quirk of breathing fire. Here it just takes all his traits that made him hard to watch the constant shouting, the poor hygine jokes him creeping on elizabeth.. and..

I have to adress this in a bit more detail. The show is REALLY creepy with elizabeth at times, both with the fanservicy outfits (which are less to show off her sexuality and indepnednce and more LOOK EVERYONE BOOBS), the whole teddy bear joke but especially blackbeard who JUST WON'T STOP hitting on her and the show treats it like a wacky joke. I get this is the 2000s, it's why it dosen't destroy the episode for me but it's still just gross and I suspect something i'll have to deal with all series long. We even get a morning wood joke with jack which comes off as HAHA GET IT HE ASSAULTED HER. Her sexual indginities are treated as one big joke and it's VERY hard to stomach. Thankfully the show has a rapid fire pace to iron it out but I just.. woudln't feel right never adressing this.

But combinging with that with just "ISN'T THIS GUY GROSS JOKES" makes blackbeard fucking intolerable. Someone having pooor hygine.. just isn't funny. It wasn't funny when I was 10 and it's not funny now. Now you can MAKE someone's horrible hygine funny. Observe

Here the jokes are.. jokes. He's dirty, but they find ways to play with the joke. Someone being gross isn't funny unless you find a way to give it character. Blackbeard just shouts and smells bad. That's it. That's what they did with the character.

While BLackbeard dosen't help the episode the episode itself.. is a LOT of fun thankfully. Jack and elizabeth's banter is thankfully way more varied here, with jack being annoyed at her modes of transportation. A standout is jack preparing to fist fight the crew of the sub they've ended up on.. before Amelia points their outnumbered and they both hide. This seems more like what the series is actually like: two very diffrent people bickering and bantering and complementing each other. Jack even points out the obvious issue of using blackbeard to help them get around the ship: that he could recognize them from last time and it adds some nice tension. And ironically , if naturally it's jack who accidently blows it by mentoining her sub.

The plot itself is delightfully nuts: it starts out simple enougH: a mysterious sea monster is sinking ships going into palu-palu, and Elizzabeth ropes jack into helping it. We also get some classic bruce campbell wordplay as jack isn't pro pro bono. I swear no one else could pull that line off.

So our heroes use the sub, a nice call back, and it ends up swallowed by the monster.. which turns out to be a giant hammerhead shark shaped sub itself. That would be bonkers enough... but then we get to whose behind it: Nardo DaVinci, descendant of Leonardo Divinci. Nardo is a hell of a lot of fun, mostly berating his minons for being absolute morons, assuming a ping on the radar is just a fish, not bothering to search the sub for people and in my faviorite moment of the episode when the heroes later baricade themselves, trying to break down the door WITH A TORPEDO.

Said torpedo is the crux of Nardo's naturally over the top and hilariously stupid plan: he's invented the first, a nice little use of real world stuff before it's time. That'd be neat and all but the bonkers spice is his target: the annual founding father's father son boat cruise, where the founding families all take a trip out to sea. Just the.. concept alone is funny. Nardo helps his case by also being compitent: he repeadtely plans to have his men just shoot our heroes and ONLY gets sidetracked when Jack baits his ego.. and even then he plans to have them all shot to death right after and only looses them because Blackbeard can breathe fire. And let's face it "this pirate we're facing can breathe fire" isn't exactly something you can plan for. If your curious Nardo's crew shanghied blackbeard (and the previous ships) for his loot and have been making him swab the deck. It's also why the heroes use him at all as he ALLGEDLY knows his way around.

Our heroes escape is even more bonkers: our heroes have to SHOOT THEMSELVES OUT OF A TORPEDO TUBE. And jack has to make the lever swing since no one can pull it for him. And all of this is complete with hilariously cheap greenscreen.

Our finale is a fuckton of fun. Our heroes can't persue them in the sub since, unlike last time, it gives them no element of suprise and a boat is worse than useless. So how do they stop this dastardly da vinci?

So eliza has a hot air balloon they plan to use to huck stuff at the sub. They do end up dislodging the torpedo but have to hang loose from blackbeards farts. I.. I wish that wasn't a plot point. He figures out who they are.. but in TRYING TO MANUALLY PICK UP A TORPEDO HE FALLS DOWN AND APPARENTLY DIES DESTROYING THE SUB.. which somehow survivies fine as blackbeard is back aboard. Either way it's an awesome climax.

Overall Shark Bait is a solid episode with a fun guest star. It's brougth down because their version of blackbeard just plain sucks, but since future episodes i'll be covering don't have him, i'm happy to cover the series again. It's got a lot of fun qualiteis and let's face it i'll watch anything with bruce campbell in it, paid or not. Thanks for reading