#modern Captain Hook
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stardustqueenbooks · 2 years ago
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Modern Captain Hook x female reader- He’ll always find me
Description: Being the gang leader’s girlfriend can be hard especially when people want to use you to get to him
(Y/n)= your name
Based on a request by @disney-girl67
AN: No explicit smut but it is implied
Warnings: Kidnapping, gangs, gang related crimes, death, murder, guns, blood and gore, implied smut, slight explicit description
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A day off from work was rare now that it was so busy but when you were given the chance for a day at the beach with your friends you jumped at it. Your boyfriend had been apprehensive at first but you were able to convince him with wide puppy dog eyes and a promise to wear something lacy and red that night. Your boyfriend was always worried about letting you go anywhere because he was worried about his enemies trying to use you to get to him. Your boyfriend was James Hook the leader of the Pirates, a notorious gang who lived by their own rules. Being his girlfriend could be hard, you had to be extra careful who you trusted and you always kept a knife on you just in case but you loved him and you knew that he would do anything to keep you safe.
Despite him always wanting to keep you safe he couldn’t be around you all the time which is what led to your currant situation. You and your friends had been relaxing on the beach when one of them had seen that a group of boys were paying close attention to you. Thinking nothing of it you continued on with your day but then the boys became to hard to ignore when they’re group became bigger and they began to get closer to you. One of your friends had been the one to realise that they were members of Hook’s rival gang, The Lost Boys. So you decided that your day at the beach was over, grabbing your stuff and making sure your phone was in your hand you began to make your way to the car.
As you walked you began to find your boyfriends contact details on your phone trying to ring him before anything bad happened but it seemed like luck was not on your side. The group had made it to the car but you had to quickly begin driving as the gang members were close behind you. With your phone ringing you sped away hoping to loose them before they were able to follow in a car but that was not the case. Their car quickly caught up to you as you handed your phone to your friend sat next to you who began to speak to James when he answered, “
 their following us!” She shouted as the car shook when the back was hit by their front, “I don’t know how we’re gonna get away!” Your friend put the call on loud speaker and the voice of your boyfriend filled the air.
“(Y/n?)” James questioned making sure you could hear him, once you had replied with a sharp yes he continued to speak, “where are you? I’m in the car now and I’m going to head your way. All you have to do is continue driving” His voice was calm but you could hear the anger behind it. You took a deep breath, “we’re turning onto George street now but they keep hitting the car,” your voice was shaky which showed the fear you had running through your veins. James reassured that he wouldn’t be long but the sounds of his voice was cut off when the car you were driving was hit from the back again, your friends screamed as the force pushed you off the road and into a tree. The horn was blaring and the airbags had exploded and the ringing in your ears covered up the shouting James was doing down the phone. The Lost Boys members had ran to the car and pulled you kicking and screaming from your seat leaving your friends crying, shouting and scared.
(Two hours later)
You had been taken to their hide out and tied to a chair, they hadn’t spoken to you at all but you knew at some point someone was gonna come into the small room to speak. You had no idea what they wanted, whether it was information or just to generally scare James. James didn’t tell you much about his business and the things he did tell you were nothing special because he didn’t want you getting targeted.
Your thoughts were interrupted when the door flung open and a tall man walked in, you had no idea who he was and you didn’t particularly care. All you wanted was James but you knew he was coming to get you. “Now,” the man started, “I’m not expecting you to know who I am and I don’t care, what I do care about is James Hook and where he put the money he stole from me.” You stared back at him silently, trying to hide the fear you felt running through your veins in the silence. “Look, all you need to do is tell me where the money is and I’ll let you go.” The Man spoke leaning down slightly to get eye level with you.
You scoffed loudly, “I don’t know what your talking about and even if I did I wouldn’t tell you” you spoke firmly “and you wouldn’t let me go!” The man smirked at you with evil eyes “no I wouldn’t” he agreed “because your fare too valuable to let go
” his voice trailed off as his hand ran over your cheek, “I can see why Hook keeps you around, you are a pretty one
”
The man stopped speaking when he heard shouting coming from outside the room, you signed in relief hearing the familiar voice of some of the men who worked with James. The man stared at you as you smirked in return, “you’re dead!” You stated, spitting the words out with venom.
Soon after the shouting started the bang of the door flying open filled the room and your boyfriend marched in with a furious look on his face. “You think you can take my girl and get away with it!” He stating making a shiver run down your spine. It always turned you on when he sounded so rough but you knew that now wasn’t the time. The man who had been talking to you stumbled back slightly wanted to get away from the murderous look that was aimed at him, blood dripped from James’ hand and covered his suit. The gun he held was aimed so the man’s head was perfectly in shot and when he glanced at you with caring eyes you looking away knowing that you wouldn’t want to see what was about to happen.
A loud bang filled the air and then the quieter bang of a body hitting the ground followed it. “Are you alright?” James asked walking to you, quickly undoing the rope and pulling you to his chest. You mumbled that you were fine into his chest as you hugged him finally feeling safe in his arms. James pulled away slightly but didn’t let you look around the room, he guided you to the door with a hand on your back, “let’s get you home.”
(3 hours later)
James had ran you a bath and cleaned the both of you up, he had made sure you had eaten and were now snuggled together in bed with only the light from the tv shining on you. “I’m sorry” James spoke tightening his grip on your waist, “I’m sorry I let that happen to you.” You looking up from your place on his chest and looking into his eyes which had nothing but sorrow in them. You leaned up and kissed him gently, “it wasn’t your fault,” you said as he began to gently stroke your hair, “you couldn’t control what happened and I’m fine.” James shook his head again tightening his grip on you, “but something worse could have happened
” you cut him off with a statement, “but it didn’t,” you kissed him gently again “I’m right here.”
You were the only one who would ever see this side of him, the more vulnerable side who showed his emotions fully and without judgement. James nodded still not believing your words because all he could think about was the fact that you could have died. James kissed you softly but it turned more passionate as the tv was forgotten and the event mostly forgotten. All you wanted in that moment was each other, to feel safe in each others arms, to feel each others skin, to feel each others love. And for the rest of the night you did not sleep but you showed each other how much you loved each other and you showed James how thankful you were that he had saved you.
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meteor752 · 4 months ago
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What the fuck is up with Hook
Why is he at some random prep school? He’s already got the hook hand, so Peter Pan has already cut it off meaning he’s been to Neverland, also he says he’s a captain so like why the fuck are you here
I hate this movie so fucking much, nothing about it makes sense to me, why is Hades a teenager, why did they make some fankid of a Sofia the first villain instead of using one of the many Disney Villains that exist, why is Maleficent a lackey, why am I devoting so much of my time to try and make sense of this movie
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glittter-skeleton · 7 months ago
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I really need to stop reading fics from when Once Upon A Time was actually airing because they don’t get Hook at all
He’s the mayor of losertown, he gets beat up 3 separate times in one episode and gets hit by a car at the end, he’s a cringefail loser, every fight of his is filmed like they’re about to fuck nasty yet he gets no bitches, he’s gods favourite little princess, he gets beat up by an elderly crippled man, he’s unkillable, he gets to watch a different version of himself get spicy with his crush before he does, he’s only got one coat and two vests, he’s 300+ years old, he lives like a looney toon, he loses a sword fight to a woman who’s holding a sword for maybe the third time, he’s the least special boy there is and yet, and YET
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rhymeswithfart · 6 days ago
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Assorted drawings
If you see this, Check this out:
This campaign is vetted at #10 on the gazavetters list. Low on funds: €354 / 30k
This is a family with two young children. Read their story, share, and donate if you can!
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princess-and-the-swan · 1 month ago
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MC Fic Rec: Can I Be Your Werewolf?
By @belovedcreation | Rating: E
After a particularly nasty encounter with a criminal, bounty hunter Emma Swan's friend convinces her to adopt a guard dog from the shelter. Little does she know that the massive dog she brings home is really the werewolf Killian Jones, who's laying low in wolf form to hide from danger. She forms a bond with her pet, one that is tested and strengthened once Killian reveals his true nature. But Killian will never be a free man and Emma will never heal from her past until a power-hungry werewolf is stopped from his mission to control all of Storybrooke.
It's spooky season guys! This month, I want to highlight some of my favorite fics depicting the Supernatural! Starting off the spooky recs, we have a fun fic from one of my favorite authors, the lovely Beloved Creation. The premise of this was so unique and it's blossomed into something that has been a pleasure to read--a story about found families, new beginnings, and hope.
Read it on AO3
If you're interested in reading more supernatural fics, check out @cssns! They've done annual events and the fics that have been produced as a result are great!
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catofadifferentcolor · 6 months ago
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Terrible Fic Idea #89: House, but make it Once Upon A Time
My dash has inexplicably been filled by House lately, leading me to rewatch the entire first season - which in turn naturally led me to think: how could I shoehorn a crossover with Once Upon A Time into this?
Or: What if Allison Cameron was replaced in the House lineup with OAUT's Emma Swan?
Just imagine it:
Following her stint in juvie, Emma Swan radically turns her life around. She gets her GED, goes to college and medical school, and lands herself a job at Princeton-Plainsboro on Dr. House's diagnostic team. She remains sharp and prickly and hesitant to trust others - less the moral center Jennifer Morrison's character was intended to be and more a House-in-the-making, though less willing to lie to patients or causally break the law to get a diagnosis.
Then early season two Henry appears on scene, casually walking into the conference room while Emma and the others are researching a case and declares himself to be her son. (For maximum impact, this should be during "Daddy's Boy," but definitely before "Hunting" and Cameron's HIV scare.)
This naturally causes some consternation, and after Emma takes Henry back home she's compelled to stay in Storybrooke and become part of the hospital staff there.
Canon proceeds more or less apace in for both series until the end of OUTA 3A, "Going Home". At that point instead of Emma and Henry starting a new life in NYC after leaving Storybrooke, they "return" to NJ. Emma takes up her old position on House's team-
-but for some reason the magic doesn't work quite as it's supposed to on House. Maybe all the Vicodin makes it easier for him to determine when his mind is playing tricks on him, or maybe he's just observant enough to catch all the little contradictions that magic would otherwise smooth over to make things seem normal.
House, naturally, treats it as just another puzzle and spends the better part of a year trying to figure it out.
He's not gotten as far as he'd like (but closer than anyone in from the Enchanted Forest might hope) when Hook shows up a la "New York City Serenade" to bring Emma back to Storybrooke. Emma, naturally, is having none of it, but House is just more intrigued, so he cuts a deal with Hook to have him admitted as their latest case in exchange for finding out the truth.
What follows is a typical House differential - only instead of doing a differential on Hook's "symptoms" House writes up all of the small contradictions and curiosities regarding Emma and her background he's picked up over the years. None of it screams fairy tale princess stranded in a world without magic, but it's definitely suggestive of something - the end result of which is a massive group road trip up to Maine to "search Hook's home", but ends up with Emma regaining her memories.
Emma remains in Storybrooke, ends up taking over the hospital there, and preferably avoids all the mess of OUAT seasons 5-7. The others return to Princeton-Plainsboro, preferably avoiding all the mess House's later seasons became. Everyone lives - if not happily ever after, then at least as the best versions of themselves.
...that's really all I have: the two major scenes of Henry appearing at Princeton-Plainsboro instead of Emma's apartment on her birthday, and Hook doing the same years later to bring her back to Storybrooke. I'm sure it can be padded out significantly, but my mind has latched on to these two scenes and won't let them go.
Bonuses include:
As I absolutely adore the relationship between Emma and Hook, keep the focus there. Her previous relationship with Neal should not be idealized at all - he was an adult, she was a kid, he took advantage of her and let her take the fall for his crimes - and this should be made clear. In no way should Snow and Charming's baby be named after Henry's birth father;
Relatedly, there should be a lot of focus on family - both of blood and by choice - and the idea that true love doesn't have to be romantic love, as is made abundantly clear in the OUAT S1 finale;
All the parallels between Belle and Rumplestiltskin's relationship and that between Chase and House. Dealer's choice on the exact nature of the latter, but I find myself wanting a happy ending for a gay couple in the "real world", so make of that what you will. (And if this skips House's weird obsession with his ex in S2 all the better.)
It's shorter than I usually have, but neither of these have ever been major obsessions for me - I mainly just want to see a cross fertilization of characters, even if its just to bring those two scenes to life. As always, feel free to adopt, just link back if you do anything with it.
More Terrible Fic Ideas
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booksteaandtoomuchtv · 1 year ago
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Witchy Woman (9/10)
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0.5 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | AO3 | 10
LOOK AT THIS STUNNING ARTWORK BY @cocohook38
Summary: When Emma came into her position as Storybrooke Coven Leader, she ended things with the powerful Vampire Overlord, Killian Jones. She’s spent over a decade working alongside him and ignoring the growing tension between them.
During his best mate’s wedding, Killian decides he is done waiting. He is ready to have his mate back in his arms (and bed) again. Emma is not an easy woman to woo, but Killian has never backed down from a challenge.
When Emma’s jilted ex-boyfriend returns to town and Emma goes missing, Killian will stop at nothing to get her back and ensure that nothing can ever separate them again.
Rating: E
CW: Mention of domestic abuse, blood and blood drinking (vampires), threatening situations, minor violence, death, mention of parental death
Entry for Captain Swan Supernatural Summer 2023 (@cssns)
Tag: @anmylica, @deckerstarblanche, @elfiola, @goforlaunchcee, @jrob64, @kmomof4, @pirateswhore, @stahlop, @teamhook, @tiganasummertree, @undercaffinatednightmare, @xarandomdreamx, @zaharadessert (let me know if you want to be added or dropped)
Killian woke up with Emma on his chest and the blankets wrapped tightly around them. Emma had built her cocoon around them both sometime in the night. Her sea-coloured eyes were already on his and she wore a contented smile while she twirled her finger in the patch of hair on his chest. 
“What a lovely sight to see upon waking, Swan.” 
“I've been admiring the view myself,” she said before placing a chaste kiss on his chest. 
He ran his hand along her side, squeezing her tight to him as he did so. Her soft skin pressed against his beneath the blankets. Everything was perfect. These moments were becoming more frequent - they were no less precious in their frequency. With these once fleeting moments of warmth, contentedness, and connection becoming commonplace between them, their relationship felt more real, more substantial, than it had before. She wasn’t going to vanish from his grasp between one second and the next. 
“I need to get up and shower and help Anna with the beach party preparations and
” Killian interrupted her task list with a sweet kiss.
“Let’s start with the shower - that is something I can help you with.” 
“Okay, yeah.” Emma shifted off him to the en suite. “But after coffee, I have to go.” 
“Hmm, that is a while from now,” Killian answered as he followed her into the bathroom to run the water for them. He tugged her into his shower and water engulfed them from all sides. He chuckled at the deep groan that she released when the side jet nearest to her hit her lower back. He kneaded his hand and his blunted arm into her lower back muscles, enjoying the sounds of her sighs and moans when he hit upon a particularly sore spot. 
“I’m never going to leave if you keep this up.” 
“That’s the plan, love.” Killian smiled cheekily at her as she turned to hug him in the warm water. 
“This is nice.”
“Aye, that it is.”
“I like waking up with you,” Emma admitted softly. Killian broke their embrace to lather soap on them both.
“Should you move in with me, we would never need to wake up any other way.” Killian hadn’t intended to ask her, but he did not regret it. He wanted her to be the first thing that he saw every morning, the blanket thief in his bed each night, the clothing left strewn about the immaculate house, the other coffee cup on the counter top, and all the thousands of tiny things that are involved in sharing a life together.
“Hmm. You want me to move in with you so that we can always wake up together?” 
“Aye. That’s one reason.” He answered after they rinsed off the soap. 
“Not the only one?”
“There are so many reasons that I want to share a home with you, Emma. Move in with me and let me show them to you?” 
The water seemed to roar more loudly in the quiet that followed. Time slowed in that cruel way it does when the next second will irrevocably impact your life. Perhaps, it is meant to help you prepare in case the ensuing second arrives ready to break you beyond repair. Maybe it is less malicious than that, a moment stretched out so that you know to pay attention and be fully present because what happens next matters. 
Killian intently watched as thoughts and emotions flickered wildly behind Emma’s eyes, as she drew in a breath to answer, as she formed the words that propelled time suddenly forward.
“You do have a kitchen full of my favourite snacks,” Emma smiled excitedly up at him. His heart was cliche as it soared with joy.
“Aye, and these plush towels you love so much,” he said, wrapping her in a towel as they stepped out of the shower. 
“And, that insanely large and comfortable bed.” 
“Aye, and coffee,” he offered, “with cinnamon.”
“All with the vampire that I love.” 
“All for the witch that I love.” 
§§§§    §§§§    §§§§    §§§§
The connection that they’d forged between them last night felt like a thread pulling and guiding them together. It was a bit strange at first - when she left to catch up with Anna, it had felt like a rubber band angry with being stretched to its limit. But, it quickly became a comfort, especially, after all the time they’d spent apart. 
As he went about his day, checking security for the beach party and of the town, he grew accustomed to the gentle nudge at his chest urging him ever closer to her. At times, he was sure he could detect echoes of emotion that belonged to his witch. 
There was also a new awareness of the strands of magic flowing around him and through him that he knew meant he’d absorbed some of her powers. He was a magical creature, his magic was an essential part of his being and ruled him, but her powers gave her control over magic. He wanted to explore this with her further, to ensure he could use her gifts without a cost to her and to experience the world as she did. Plus, he thought up some positions and games for them to try once he learned how her telekinesis worked. 
He was completing a final check of the security plan for tomorrow’s event before heading to the beach party when he received an email from Smee reporting a new possible security risk. 
“Bloody,” Killian cursed as he opened the missive. He couldn’t afford to overlook any potential situation just because he was anxious to get to the beach. 
He skimmed the report - a non-issue. But, he’d been delayed far longer than he wished. He shut down his computer and cleaned off his desk when the echoes of emotion that had accompanied him through the bond all day fell silent. 
His heart pounded as he pulled out his phone and called David. He was travelling at the height of his vampiric speed, the beach almost in view, as he listened to the phone ringing out. 
The band was playing and the party was in full swing when he reached the shoreline. The tether to Emma tugged him away from the party. Fear that didn’t belong to him crawled up his spine - Emma. 
“Hey, it’s David. Leave a message.”
Killian cursed, waiting for the beep. “Something has happened to Emma. I am tracking her and sharing my location with you. When you get this, find me. See you soon, mate.” 
He followed that wonderful tug toward the abandoned mines. When he reached the entrance,  he caught her scent mixed with another he knew well. Smee? 
As if in answer to his question, Smee emerged from the dark. 
“Sire?”
“Mr Smee,” Killian acknowledged. “Why aren’t you at your post?” 
“I got a call about some werewolves causing trouble nearby. I came to check it out.” 
Liar. The thought came from the magic swirling around him - Emma’s lie detector was more literal than he ever considered. The betrayal stung for a moment. The way his scent was so intermingled with Emma’s suggested that Smee was a part of what was happening with Emma. He wanted to demand answers, to hurt Smee the way Emma’s fear was hurting him, but he had to get to her. He didn’t want to waste time on Smee’s games. 
He smiled at Smee, all teeth and predator. Smee had a moment to process the threat before Killian rushed him and tore his head from his shoulders in one quick movement. He left the body and head at the mouth of the shaft and entered the mine. 
He could feel the anger radiating from her through the thread that connected them now. Anger meant she would find a way to fight, that would buy him time to reach her.
As he raced deeper into the mine, Killian’s chest started to burn as if it were being set on fire. What the fuck is happening? 
He set his teeth against the crippling pain and pressed on. He encountered a few weak werewolves blocking his progress. A wave of his hand sent them into the rock wall, knocking them out, and clearing the way forward. 
Screaming bounced around the dark walls around him and the scent of Emma’s blood was thick in the air. A growl tore through him as rage, red and hot, overtook him. He stormed forward, entering a cavern lined with sigils and one large stone slab where Emma was restrained and screaming as she battled a force he could not see. 
Regina and Neal stood in the space, watching the brutal scene unfold before them. Regina’s mouth was moving quickly, chanting the spell that was attacking Emma. Neal turned to face him with a broad smile on his face. “She’s going to be mine, now,” Neal gloated in way of greeting. 
Killian flung him against a wall to be dealt with later and turned his attention to the witch harming his mate. He darted toward her. She raised an arm, suspending him in mid-stride. Her chanting continued as she held him with little effort. He fought against Regina’s magic with all his strength but failed to overpower her magic, failed to stop Emma’s suffering. 
Regina smiled. 
Now would be a fantastic time to arrive, David. 
Killian stopped fighting against Regina’s power. It wrapped around him and held him in place. A witch’s magic would always be more powerful than the raw strength of either a vampire or a werewolf. It was how the gods kept the balance between the creatures. He just needed to figure out some other way to best her. 
An itch in his fingers alerted him of a change in the magic restraining him. It was gathering at his fingertips, aligning with the magic at his call, no longer holding him in place but awaiting his commands. 
He snarled forcing the magic back into Regina. It halted her chanting before tearing her into pieces from the inside out. A pile of purple dust gathered where the villainess had just stood. “Bloody hell.” Emma’s magic was a truly terrifying and wonderful thing. 
Turning to the slab, he waved away her restraints and pulled her into his arms. She was unconscious as he turned to take her out of this hell. But she was safe, now. He gripped her tight to him, the relief of her heart beating against his chest almost brought him to his knees.
“I think I hear something in this direction.” 
“David, my magic says they are this way.” Mary Margaret’s voice rang out through the tunnels. 
“Mary Margaret. David. We’re here.” Killian called, his voice breaking with emotion. She’s safe, now. She will be okay. 
§§§§    §§§§    §§§§    §§§§
For every day that Emma did not wake, Killian carved a reminder into Neal’s flesh. For every time she called out Killian’s name during her endless slumber, he would break a bone, heal it, and break it again. The hisses and cries of her tormentor did very little to ease his anger, but even a drop of water is worth collecting if you’re dying of thirst. 
He entered the cell holding Neal, for now, ready to claim his flesh as the seventh day passed without any change. They had healed her with his venom, the bones in her hand knitted together days ago, her body was healthy but her mind was still out of reach. He felt like he was slowly losing parts of himself every day she stayed in this state. Perhaps, it was why he was enjoying taking parts from Neal so much. 
Neal looked up as Killian entered, the fear behind his eyes dulled from the day before, and his posture seemed resigned but no longer hopeless. A dark feeling crept through Killian, his jaw clenching against it.
“How’s Ems?” 
“You don’t get to ask.” Killian shut the door behind him, the lock engaging automatically behind him with a quiet click. “I do apologise, Neal, for you seem to have mistaken yourself for a guest in my home. Or a plaything that I intend to keep around for some time.” 
Neal’s eyes widened and the sharp acidic scent of fear filled the air as it dawned on him that tonight was going to be different than the previous six. Killian’s smirk was all hungry predator toying with his prey. “I assure you that I intend to rectify those misconceptions most thoroughly before I leave tonight. I am afraid that does mean that you won’t live to see tomorrow, mate.”
Killian smiled when Neal rallied his courage to make a last stand against him. He was hungry for a fight. Neal attacked first, lunging for Killian with his fangs extended as if they would pose any threat to Killian. Killian laughed without humour knocking the weaker vampire to the ground. He put his boot against Neal’s arm, pinning him to the floor. 
“She will never forgive you for killing me.” Neal spit out. Killian increased the pressure on Neal’s arm until a satisfying crack split the air. Neal grunted in pain, tears leaking from his eyes.
“She doesn’t like you nearly as much as you’ve told yourself,” Killian said smoothly. 
“She’ll leave you. That’s what she does.” Neal’s voice was between a whimper and a whine, a pathetic sound befitting the creature he was. 
A light knock at the door prevented Killian from responding. Killian’s heart squeezed in his chest, he knew what that knock meant. 
“Goodbye, Neal.” Killian dug his hook into Neal’s chest piercing his black heart. Neal pulled in one last wheezing breath before Killian grabbed a fistful of his hair. “I can’t say you’ll be missed,” Killian growled as he pulled. 
Killian kicked the heap of Neal’s body before turning on his heel and leaving the cell. David stood outside of the door. He nodded slightly to Killian, a small smile tugging at this lips, as Killian emerged from the room. Pulse racing, Killian turned to the guard he’d posted at the door, “Will, dispose of the tosser and ensure he is properly turned to ash.”
“Yes, sire.” 
“Good man.” Killian made his way back to his room in the best spirits he’d been in all week. 
Emma was waking.
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flickynightdarkness · 8 months ago
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There are times when the Villains gang babysat Hades and Persephone's child Melinoe
[NOT CANON]
[Captain Hook, Smee and Hades watch Cruella shut her car door]
[Hades goes to get Melinoe out of Cruella's car but the car door is locked]
Hades: Did we just locked my kid in the car?
Hook: Did you put your keys in the bag?!
Cruella: I did put the keys in my bag
Cruella: That's what we always—
Hades: [sighs] De Vil, i told you not to put your d#mn keys in your bag!
Smee: Don't freak out
Smee: Come on everyone, don't freak out
Hades: Melinoe, it's okay
Smee: đŸŽ”A, b, c, d, e, f, gđŸŽ”
Hades: What, are you singing to her?
Hook: The bilge rats get arrested for this, Smee!
Cruella: We have to keep our dear calm
Smee: đŸŽ”h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, pđŸŽ”
Hades: Do all four doors lock?
Hook: I'M BREAKING THE WINDOW!!!
???: Emergency assistance
???: This is [unnamed]
Hades: [holds the phone] Yeah, we locked my kid in De Vil's car and these bozos are judging us!
Hook: [runs to the car, carrying his sword] I SWEAR TO ME TIMBERS!!! I'M GONNA BREAK IT!!!
Hades: Hey! [red flames rise across him and the road by his face, angered] DO NOT BREAK THE WINDOW!!!
Hades: YOU'LL GET GLASS ON HER!!!
???: Sir, tell your wife to relax. Everything is going to be ok
Hades: That's a man and he and the other guys... are just an old company of mine
???: Really?
Hades: Hey, don't worry Melinoe. Listen, your old man's coming for you!
???: Sir, we just set the signal. The doors should be unlocked by now
Hades: Check — check the door
Smee: Check the door, check the door De Vil dear
[Cruella tries to open the door]
Cruella: It's not unlocked—
[Door unlocked]
Cruella: Oh
Hook: [panting while Smee is patting him on the back] Oh
[Cruella carries Melinoe over to Hades]
Hades: [holds Melinoe] Okay
Smee: Why, this is amazing. How did they do that Mrs De Vil
Cruella: I don't know my dear. It's just—
Hades: [holding Melinoe] We got it covered, thank you [hangs up]
Hook: Did that come from space?!
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jihef03 · 1 year ago
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Young romance
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heatherfield · 2 years ago
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And you guys are very impressive, yourselves. John, I love your editorials. And Michael, your “Dear Darlings” are hilarious. The advice you give, man, it’s so pure and honest. They’re really great.
The New Adventures of Peter and Wendy, 2.11 “Wow This is Awkward Part Deux” [x]
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stardustqueenbooks · 2 years ago
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Captain Hook x reader- This is wrong, isn't it?
Description: Pirates were notorious for kidnappings but you never thought it would happen to you
AN: There could be a part two if people want it
Based on a request by @disney-girl67
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It was meant to be just a normal day, hanging out with friends, relaxing away from work and just having a good time but as soon as you saw that stupid ship approaching you knew that the day was not going to go how you had planned it.
The pirates in the area were notorious for kidnapping and there had been a rise in people going missing that everyone had presumed were them. Now you found yourself becoming one of those people, you had lost your friends running away from the beach and were now being chased by pirates who were hooting and hollering behind you.
You had no idea what would happen if they caught you so you were trying your best not to get caught, running through the trees and breathing heavily. You hated running, hated it with a passion so this was probably your worst nightmare.
Suddenly, a man with long hair jumped in front of you laughing loudly and showing his gold teeth, you gasped and turned to try and run away from him but were stopped by another pirate. You quickly realised that you were surrounded by the pirates who all sneered at you before simultaneously jumping forward and grabbing you.
You felt their hands wander all over your body before you were lifted from the ground, no matter how much you wiggled or moved around you couldn't get out of their grip and you soon found yourself being dropped onto the wood that was the pirate ship.
As you looked around all you could see were pirates, some were sneering, some were laughing and others were staring blankly. You continued to look around until you heard a voice shout, "everyone back to your posts."
Black boots entered your vision as the man who spoke walked closer to you, "Mr Smee," the voice asked, it was smooth and made chills run down your spine, "take the girl to my quarters."
You were then pulled to your feet and dragged down some stairs and thrown into a room by a fat man who stuttered his way through a sentence. And then you were left alone.
You took a moment to breathe before you began to wander around the room which you believed to be the Captain's quarters. Your wandering was put to a stop when the door swung open and in came the man who had spoken before, he was muttering to himself before he stood to his full height and looked at you.
"Do you know who I am?" he asked, taking the red hat from his head and placing it on the desk. You nodded stiffly and answered, "You're captain hook."
"Good!" he stated, walking to sit down by the desk, "I've been watching you for a while now," Your eyes bulged in surprise at what the captain has said, "I saw you one day on the beach and knew that I had to have you." His voice sent more shivers down your spine, that wasn't normal, was it?
"What?" you asked, your voice shaking as you trembled, your mind swirling with thoughts, you couldn't deny that the captain was attractive in a unique way and being on his ship send shivers of excitement down your spine. That must not be normal?
Captain Hook smirked down at you as he walked closer, "I knew that I had to have you when I saw how beautiful you are, you're gonna stay here with me," you started to stutter slightly but quickly quietened when he continued to speak, "you're going to stay here with me forever and be my right-hand woman."
This was wrong.
Was the only thought that was spinning around your head.
This was so so wrong but why did it feel so good...
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please-picturemeintheweeds · 2 months ago
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Taylor and Travis look so Grown Up in those pics, which idk what that even means, and maybe I’m just bi, but Travis will wear his 40s, 50s, 60s Very Well. (So will Taylor, as most people do!) idk I’m just watching a lot of people age in my life; neighbor kids, cousins graduating, my parents getting towards their 70s, my self starting to Look Different as I approach 28. Idk! Humans are so cool
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idristardis · 2 months ago
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@spartanguard's tags: #killian jones#your scruff sir#ouat 5x06#how many werewolf fics did this look inspire?#(answer: MANY)
It's funny you say that...because this is absolutely 1000% THE LOOK I keep picturing as I'm reading @belovedcreation's stellar Can I Be Your Werewolf?
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366 Days of Killian Jones [236/366]
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princess-and-the-swan · 5 months ago
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One-Shot Fic Rec: A Love/Hate Relationship
By @jrob64 | Rating: T
Killian Jones' neighbor, Emma Swan, has hated him since the first day they met. When she finds out he came down with the flu and attempts to nurse him back to health, he's more than a little confused. A fluffy CS one-shot where Emma (attempts!) to nurse a sick Killian back to health even though they have a rocky relationship. It's cute and funny and a quick read if you need a lil pick me up! The author is going through a rough time so send them some love in their comments!
Read it on AO3
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booksteaandtoomuchtv · 1 year ago
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Witchy Woman (7/10)
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0.5 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | AO3 | 8 | 9 | 10
LOOK AT THIS STUNNING ARTWORK BY @cocohook38
Summary: When Emma came into her position as Storybrooke Coven Leader, she ended things with the powerful Vampire Overlord, Killian Jones. She’s spent over a decade working alongside him and ignoring the growing tension between them.
During his best mate’s wedding, Killian decides he is done waiting. He is ready to have his mate back in his arms (and bed) again. Emma is not an easy woman to woo, but Killian has never backed down from a challenge.
When Emma’s jilted ex-boyfriend returns to town and Emma goes missing, Killian will stop at nothing to get her back and ensure that nothing can ever separate them again.
Rating: E
CW: Mention of domestic abuse, blood and blood drinking (vampires), threatening situations, minor violence, death, mention of parental death
Entry for Captain Swan Supernatural Summer 2023 (@cssns)
Tag: @anmylica, @deckerstarblanche, @elfiola, @goforlaunchcee, @jrob64, @kmomof4, @pirateswhore, @stahlop, @teamhook, @tiganasummertree, @undercaffinatednightmare, @xarandomdreamx, @zaharadessert (let me know if you want to be added or dropped)
Lifting her gaze from the seemingly endless lines of tiny, irregular text in front of her, she let her eyes rest on the sight of the gorgeous vampire studying a similarly old and yellowed text. He toyed with his pen, cleverly manipulating it between his fingers, as he read unaware she’d stopped her own research. Her heart almost hurt as she took in features too perfect to be real,  his cheekbones had been carved by a particularly gifted angel doing their best work, the perfection of his jaw was highlighted by deep amber scruff, and his eyes were the deep, rich blue of a clear winter sky. 
He was focused, his tongue running under this sharp canine as he read. His fangs weren’t elongated now as they’d been when he ran them along her neck this morning. He had held her tight, thrusting deep into her, as she rocked against him chasing her pleasure. The scrape of his fangs had sent shivers straight to her core. The memory crept up on her all morning in vivid detail while they worked distracting her completely from the dull, ancient texts. 
Emma heard so many things about the bite from a vampire. Connections between vampire pairs and vampires and their mates were deepened by the bite. Some claimed it was the most intimate connection any supernatural pairs could share - and werewolves could communicate telepathically with their mates. Most who were bitten by vampires agreed it was the most pleasurable experience they’d ever had - some even became obsessed, addicted to the bite. Emma wondered how enjoyable it would have to be to cause people to stalk vampires, seeking another hit of the venom. Older vampires were said to cause more pleasure. Killian was one of the oldest she’d ever heard of. What could his bite do to her?
“Does it really
” Emma felt her face heat when those stunning eyes looked up to meet hers. The intensity of his gaze heated her more than the question she had started to ask.
“Does what really what, Swan?” His voice was hardly more than a rumble. When he took in the deep blush blooming on her features, his lips quirked up in a heartbreakingly beautiful smile. 
“Your bite, does it really enhance things?”
“Enhance things?” Killian’s eyes danced with humour. He clearly knew what she was asking and was enjoying her embarrassment entirely too much. 
“Never mind,” she snapped and returned her attention to the book before her.
“Do you want to know what a vampire’s bite is like? Because you can read that in any of your many books on the subject.” Killian asked keeping his voice in that low villainous timbre. His eyes were rolling with that starlight of magic. “Or, are you asking what my bite, specifically, would do to you?” 
“What would make your bite different?” 
Killian’s gaze flicked away as he chewed over his next words. He turned his attention back to her and hesitated for a moment - his tongue wetting his bottom lip followed quickly by his teeth grazing over the spot. Why is he nervous?
“If I were to bite you, Swan, I believe it would transform our relationship completely.”
“Because you’re such a powerful vampire and I won’t be able to stay away from your allure after one bite?” Emma teased. 
“No. Because when a vampire bites their mate, he gives her more of himself. You would see memories some memories as with most bites, but you would also know what I am feeling so long as my venom is in you. Since you are a witch, I expect there would be some exchange of our powers. I’ve heard powerful conduits,” he looked at her pointedly before continuing, “share an even deeper connection with their mates after their bond is solidified in this way.”
“You believe that I am your mate?”
“I know it to be so.”
“How?” Her voice was hardly above a whisper. “Don’t you have to taste my blood before you can be certain?” 
“When your blood is fresh, I can smell it.” His cheeks were rosy at the admission as if it were something embarrassing to admit. “The night before you ended things, you had cut your hand while we were cooking together.”
“You’ve known all this time?” Emma murmured. “We’ve wasted all this time?” 
“What’s a decade or two when you live forever?” He answered with a smile before adding softly, “For an opportunity to hold you again, I would have held out hope for us until we both ceased to exist.”
Tears pricked at her eyes. How did she come to have a love like his? Of one thing she was absolutely certain, she’d spend the rest of their infinite lives showing him that he was loved just as deeply and unconditionally as he loved her. She’d prove to him that his faith in them, his hope over all this time apart wasn’t wasted. 
§§§§    §§§§    §§§§    §§§§
The Supernatural Gala held on the first night of the festivities was, Emma was certain, a form of torture banned by several governments. The dress that Anna had produced for her to wear tonight clung tightly to her form. She supposed it was fashionable and exquisite in its own right, but it made her skin itch and she felt a bit like she was playing dress up with her mum’s clothes, wanting to be the elegant grown-up that the finery suggested she should be.
Anna had transformed the dated ballroom into a scene that rivalled something from the Fae Courts. The high ceiling had become a clear night sky, twinkling with stars. The old wooden columns had been transformed into large, sprawling trees that reached toward the night sky. Their trunks were wrapped with cloth that shimmered as if it were woven from moonbeams. Flowers with petals so deep a blue that they might have been black bloomed on some trees, while others were filled with leaves the colour of freshly fallen snow. Music from an orchestra that Emma could not find drifted into the room and muted the conversations between guests. A few couples were dancing to the music, their movements impossibly complex and graceful. Most of the guests were standing in tight groups exchanging hollow pleasantries while they sipped endless glasses of wine.
“Amphitrite would envy how well you wear her waters.” Killian appeared by her side with a glass of wine and the warmth she hadn’t realised she was missing until his arm was wrapped around her waist. His perfectly tailored suit was the same fathomless blue as the ocean at night kissed by the moon, the same colour as her gown, the colour of his eyes when they darkened with need.
Emma rolled her eyes at him - as if his words and his muscular legs in those tight slacks didn’t affect her - and she plucked the glass out of his hand. She leaned into his side and he tightened his hold, his hook resting on her hip. She sipped at the wine gratefully before resting her head against his shoulder. “I hate these things.”
“I know, love.” He pressed a kiss into her hair. Emma adored that he didn’t press her further, didn’t try to convince her these were fun or necessary events, and didn’t brush off her comment with a dismissive, “It isn’t that bad.” Rather, he stood by her side making the whole stuffy night more bearable with his steady presence (and the wine - of course). 
He took the empty glass from her hand and set it on a nearby table and offered his hand to her. “What do you say, Swan, would you dance with me?” 
Emma smiled, laying her hand in his. “Why not?”
“That’s the spirit.”
She followed his confident movements in a complex dance that many of the other guests seemed to know the steps to as well. She knew the music must indicate the moves that were expected of the guests, but it all sounded like background music to her. 
“It’s a waltz,” Killian murmured, answering her unasked question. 
“Of course, you know how to waltz.”
“Mum was fascinated by balls and masquerades,” Killian spoke softly as he led her in a series of turns and complex steps. “She told Liam and me these fanciful, romantic stories of men and women falling in love as they danced together in ballrooms filled with magic and wonder. She danced with us, her little princes, humming the songs that she overheard from the ballrooms she was never invited into.” 
The sadness behind his eyes at the memories tugged at her heart. She wanted him to know that he was not alone any longer and she was glad he’d shared such a precious memory with her. She wasn’t quite sure how to tell him just that, so she pulled him close to her, interrupting the graceful movements of the dance to kiss him.
He kissed her back as though she were the only thing that had ever mattered. 
A cloud of white haze surrounded them, magic swirling, gently pulling and twisting until it wrapped them up tightly and transported them away from the noisy gathering. Killian raised an eyebrow when he saw the familiar walls of his bedroom surrounding them. Emma smiled back at him with a mixture of pride and mischievousness on her features. “That’s quite a trick, Swan.”
Smile still in place, she wiggled her fingers and his jacket and shirt were tossed carelessly onto the floor. He pulled her to him and kissed her again, nipping her bottom lip and soothing the sting with his tongue. She moaned lowly as his tongue tasted and teased her. He swallowed her moan. “You taste divine.” 
“You’ve never tried a bite,” Emma teased. 
Killian tensed in her arms. “Emma?” The emotion behind that one word cracked his voice as he searched her features for an answer to a question he didn’t dare ask. 
“I want you to.” 
“You’re certain?” He kept his eyes focused on hers, ensuring there were no traces of doubt or hesitation hidden somewhere in them. “Once we do this, we can’t take it back.” 
Emma lifted to her toes to place a chaste kiss on his cheek. His stubble was rough on her lips, but it made her smile. Everything about this moment felt right. Her magic hummed and stirred around them as if it, too, agreed she was making the right decision. The fear she expected to accompany this decision was notably absent. Instead, she was filled with a pleasant hum of anticipation and an absolute certainty that this was going to be a wonderful thing for them to share. “I want to be yours in every way, Killian. That includes the way that vampires are together. I want you to mark me.”
“As you wish.” His voice was more growl, more vampire than she’d ever heard it before. Excitement spread through her - her chest and cheeks flushing a deep red. “You look absolutely delicious when you flush like that for me.” 
Quicker than she could track his movements, he was behind her unzipping her gown and dragging his lips along her neck. The gown flowed to the floor, pooling at her feet. Killian sucked in a breath at the sight of her naked before him. 
“So bloody perfect, Emma.” He told her as he carried her to his bed and laid her down almost reverently. He tugged off his trousers and pants in a quick motion. He kneeled before her. “I love having you laid out before me with your cunt dripping.” His warm breath flowed over her sensitive flesh, pulling a moan from her. “I haven’t even touched you yet, love.”
“Needy witch.” Then, his tongue was on her. He ran the flat of his tongue slowly up her slit, savouring the taste of her. He nipped lightly on her clit before licking and sucking at her folds again. He slipped two fingers into her, stroking her and building the tension up, while he sucked at her clit. Her hips lifted from the bed, desperately trying to reach her peak quicker. 
“Impatient little thing,” he admonished softly, pulling his head away from her as retribution for her trying to take control. He trailed kisses along her thigh, smirking at the whines and curses flowing from her at his cruelty. She grabbed his hair and pulled him back to her centre. A low laugh escaped him, vibrating against her clit in the most wonderful way, and he returned his full attention to pleasuring her with his clever fingers and tongue. 
He twirled his tongue around her clit in a motion that made her buck against him once again “Fuck, Killian.” She could feel him smile even as he continued devouring her. His rough stubble provided her with additional friction carrying her even closer to the edge. 
The tension was almost too much, the release a moment away, when he sunk his fangs into her thigh. Warmth spread through her as he drank, she felt like she was floating away, a blissful haze welcoming her as she shattered around his fingers. 
Pictures flashed through her mind, moments Killian had captured and held dear of them working together of her smiling at him of the yearning he’d felt over the years. Something deep, something eternal flooded her system as he smoothed the wound over with sweet kisses, murmuring praises into her skin as he watched her intently as if he expected her to regret it.
The words rushed out of her before she could think about it and stop them.
“I love you."
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fourmoony · 7 months ago
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heyyy read you're looking for requests so here's one! james coming from hockey practice (i love hockey player james) and you tell him that a guy from uni has been hitting on you and stuf. he doesn't get mad just queasy, but then he needs reassurance too!ïżŒïżŒ
thanks for requesting, angel!
cw: insecurities, language, unwanted advances
1.4k, modern au, ice hockey James
The tell-tale sound of James' bag being abandoned haphazardly by the door alerts you to his presence. The door clicks shut soon after, followed by a heavy sigh. He's likely exhausted - always is after practice, especially if he and Sirius get caught mouthing off and are punished with bag skating.
James rounds the corner into the living room at the same time you pause your show and sit up to greet him. He doesn't acknowledge your abandoned plate from dinner or the pile of unfolded washing on the arm chair to his left. Instead, he gives you a tired smile and collapses into a heap beside you on the sofa. "Hi, bug." He mumbles, chin tucked into the neckline of his hoodie. Exhaustion seeps from his voice.
"Hi, handsome." You soothe, hand reaching out to toy with the curls at the nape of your boyfriend's neck. They're still damp from his post-practice shower, the smell of his body wash sweet and heady in your nose. "How was practice?"
He lets out a long suffering sigh, leans into your touch, "Stressful. The team isn't where we need to be for the playoffs. Coach made sure to let us know how angry he is about it."
You hum softly, scoot closer to James on the sofa until you're practically in his lap. James likes touch, he likes the connection, the intimacy, the weight of your body on top of his. You're happy to indulge him, the flowers that your boyfriend brings about your rib cage blossoming as his arm wraps around your middle, hoists you fully onto his lap. "What does he expect, you know? Half of his team graduated out, last year. He only has a couple of you guys left and the rest are freshmen." You try to justify James, but it seems the reminder only further sours his mood.
"Yeah, try telling him that. He thinks everyone is just born to be in the NHL, that these guys should already be up to standard, that they don't need the same exact training and coaching that we got." James' voice is thick with coiling tension, even if his muscles seem to be relaxing under you.
You smooth the baby hairs under your fingers, tilting your head until his eyes meet yours, "You're their captain, baby," You smile, "I bet they'd listen to it a lot better coming from you. They like you, look up to you. You be their coach if coach isn't going to step up."
Your boyfriend smiles, the sun peeking through storm clouds. A glimpse of your Jamie. He leans forwards, lips soft and gentle as he presses them to yours. He hums into the kiss, hands squeezing your hips. "Thanks."
"Anytime, handsome."
"How was your day?" James asks, feet stretching out to sit atop the coffee table.
You'd scold him if you weren't so busy quelling the beating of your heart. Any kiss from James sends you reeling, has done since the first time in freshman year. You don't think you'll ever get over the fact that he's your boyfriend. That he loves you as you love him, that you'll grow old and grey together. It never quite feels real.
"Good. Productive. We have a project due for McGonagall's class on Wednesday so I just worked on that most of the day." You don't feel the need to mention that you pointedly worked alone on your half of the project, but James frowns at your words and you know he's going to ask.
"You worked alone?"
"Yeah." You should probably say more, but James has a shorter fuse than Sirius does in general when it comes to you and you don't feel like unleashing all two hundred pounds of ice-hockey muscle onto the arrogant asshole who won't leave you alone.
James' thumb rubs steady circles into the fat of your thigh, his brows hooked upward in the middle a blatant sign of his confusion, "Your group have left you to do all the work?"
"No," You shake your head, "It was just easier to do my part on my own."
James doesn't say anything, but it's clear that he's waiting for you to go on. You sigh through your nose, head falling to rest on your boyfriend's shoulder, "One of the guys in my group has been hitting on me pretty regularly."
"What?" James asks around a swallow, voice hoarse. His muscles tense under you, his thumb pausing it's soothing measures on your thigh.
You shrug, "He keeps saying how he'd treat me right, how a 'pretty girl like me' deserves better. It's all bullshit, so I chose to work myself and just send the rest of the group my sections."
"Right."
It's odd, the way your body reacts to a single word as though it were a slap in the face. Your stomach sinks because you realise James isn't angry. He isn't itching to pound the guy's face into the ground and he isn't insisting you allow him to fix the problem, himself. You remove your head from James' shoulder, find him pale faced and distant. He looks lost, nauseous. "Jamie?"
James shrugs, eyes cold, "What?"
"'Right.'? That's all you have to say to that? What's wrong?" You ask, drawing further away the colder the look in James' eyes gets.
"What would you like me to say? That he might be right?" There's a clipped edge to your boyfriend's voice that you've never heard before, that jolts your body into fight or flight mode quicker than you'd care to admit.
You remove yourself from James' lap, confusion evident on your face as you settle to face him on the coffee table. His feet meet the ground with a thud as he moves to stand. Your hand flies out, a firm grip on his knee that begs him not to move. James gives you a sad look as he complies, fidgets with the draw strings on his jogging bottoms. "You think he has a point?" You ask.
James nods, lips pursed, eyes avoiding yours so evidently it angers you.
"Why?"
Your boyfriend shrugs again, tips his head back and lets out a groan, "You know at the end of this year I'm going to be drafted, right? I'm going to have to move across the country, probably, I won't have a choice in the matter and neither will you."
"We've had this argument before, James. I'm going wherever you go. I don't care where it is! It could be fucking Antartica and I'd still go." Your voice sounds less stern than you'd intended, but James softens slightly at your words.
"But you shouldn't have to just pick up your life and move because of me. You deserve someone who can give you stability and all of their time. I can't." James leans forwards until his elbows are resting on his knees, his face so close to yours you can feel his breaths.
It's an age-old argument, one you and James used to have often in the beginning. Before you knew that you wanted James in your life forever, back when he was trying to push you away with everything he had because he didn't want to risk falling in love with you and having to leave you, one day. The argument lessened the longer you were together, decisions made. You'd made up your mind the day James told you he loved you that you'd follow him anywhere, that you'd give up anything and everything to just be with him.
"I don't want anyone else. I don't care where we are in this world, James. I want you. That's all." You reach for him, thumbs swiping under his eyes in steady motions.
He takes a breath, closes his eyes under your touch. "I can't help but feel I'm asking you to sacrifice more than I'm worth."
And that just won't do. You clamber back onto his lap, legs on either side of his hips and chase his eyes. They're dark in the dim light of the living room, a deep brown filled with fear. "You're worth everything, Jamie. Everything." You tell him. And you mean it.
James swallows, nods. His arms wrap around you, pull you to him until he's falling back into the softness of the couch. "I love you." He tells you, vulnerable as you've ever heard him.
Flowers bloom all along the crevices of your rib cage, pull taught until you're so overflowing with love and happiness that all you can think to do is kiss him. He chases your lips when you pull back, a smile toying at the corner of his mouth. "I love you too, Jamie."
"So you're not gonna leave me for that guy in your Psych class?" He asks, a twinkle in his eye that lets you know he's kidding.
You laugh, loud and obnoxious and your boyfriend swallows it with a world-ending kiss.
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