#missing him... i wanted to watch an ep to see and hear min

[1980ssunflower]

I miss & need them both so badly...

[onomatopagu-et-cie]

The Killing Vote (ep. 7 notes)

The Killing Vote (ep. 1-5 notes) The Killing Vote (ep. 6 & overall notes) The Killing Vote: more on Joohyun, Kwon Seokju & Kim Muchan

I don’t know if you saw, but they announced episode 8 will be out next week on October 5th……….. After THIS preview no less, you’ve got to be kidding me aaaaaaaa (PД`q。 ) ·。 ' ゜

This got again really long, sorry again!!!!

Have a nice week!

(SPOILERS UP TO EPISODE 7!!!!)

Let Jihoon, Joomin, Joohyun, KMC & KSJ get their happy found family ending (இ﹏இ`｡) Put them in a slice of life, far far away from this noir genre plsssssss

I appreciated the fact that no explicit violence (except when BWT was beaten up by Min Jiyoung's family & KMC) was shown on screen ie. for Narae nor her dog ; the violence implied from all the scenes were more than enough already (eg. the video on KSJ ; the audio recording Narae’s voice)... ! And by the way, Park Sungwoong's acting in this episode!!!!!! I also loved how KMC’s character was shown trying to maintain a composure/restraint (his voice damn) in front of KSJ’s grief.

And the Jihoon & Joohyun scenes were GREAT!! Joohyun sounds like that sister you can naturally rely on!

(She needs to live, you hear me?!)

(Don’t read the new OST’s lyrics you are warned haha, it was beautifully played for Jihoon’s scene and the lyrics could also very well apply to KMC & KSJ in KMC’s pov!)

♦ September 15, 2015 (Lrae091515)

Narae disappeared on September 15, 2015… Just like how the video test is titled!

OH and something I missed!!! In the first post I mentioned the video test title, I wondered if it could refer to both Narae and Dies Irae (since Mozart’s Requiem was played in ep4):

As for the ‘Lrae’… It could be a wild WILD guess but ‘Lrae’ could be ‘irae’ as in Dies Irae/day of wrath (capital i looks like a lowercase L), which is a sequence in Requiem mass!

But the capital L could also stand for the korean letter ᄂ/니은 (nieun), which is the first letter for Narae/나래. Added to the ‘rae’, it gives ‘Narae091515’.

♦ The items in LMS’s room & his ring

Some of the items that were in the display case in LMS’s hidden room were revealed in this episode (from left to right):

KSJ’s suitcase

KSJ’s book he signed for LMS

KSJ’s mug, which is seen carried in the present by:

Jihoon (we only see him retrieve it from the deliveryman)

LMS (a whole collection)

This Gaetal in ep4 with this particular red mug when they rage as the public opinion is shaken because KMC was believed to be dead.

The picture with Narae seems to have been taken the day of the conference shown at the beginning of the episode. LMS probably stole the picture because it was a significant day to him ie. when he met KSJ in person.

Also, about the ring, LMS had it even in the flashbacks (picture to the right). Could it be some device to send him a reminder to take his medicine?

♦ More on shame

Something I wanted to add to what I said in a previous post (‘On the frames facing down (ep. 1 & 6), shame and guilt’): when KSJ visited his house in the present thanks to Joohyun, he only dusted off Narae’s picture to face her stuffed bunny.

Ep7 showed the other frame was a picture of KSJ and her, so it could show how he still strongly feels he failed her as her father:

♦ Narae, Joomin and Jihoon

FINALLY a bittersweet but hopeful? (I don’t care if it’s wishful thinking, let me hope okay ;;) parallel that’s clearly the opposite of ep4 & 6’s framing, the new OST (Aalia, Blue) was a perfect addition, it was soothing:

♦ The third person meeting with Narae and KSJ

(1) « She »

At the beginning of the episode, Narae met KSJ and said a ‘she’ couldn’t join them for dinner according to the subtitle translation when I watched.

(I’m unfortunately not able to watch on Prime, so I’m not sure if it’s fansubs or the Prime translation ; I wanted to use my free trial to watch the drama and other series, but it’s region-locked in my country and I don’t have a VPN ;;)

The gendered pronoun is an addition of the translation as the original exchange omitted any indication on the subject.

Most of the time [in Korean] the subject is implied, and you would rather address someone by their title or name (with an honorific if need be) depending on your relationship eg. Joohyun calls KMC 팀장님/team leader and KSJ 교수님/professor, Joomin calls her sister 언니/big sister. Note: but it can also be used by a female speaker for an older woman she’s close to eg. a friend, a girlfriend (like 형 = younger man -> older man ; 오��� = younger woman -> older man or 누나 = younger man -> older woman).

This is how Narae and KSJ’s conversation went:

« — 왜 혼자 왔어? / Why did you come alone? — 또 먼저 갔지. 오늘도 할일이 엄청 또 많대. / [They] left early again. [They] said [they] had a lot of things to do today too. — 셋이 같이 저녁을 먹을랬는데. (…) / I’d hoped the three of us could have dinner together. »

Nothing in this exchange hints at the identity of the person that accompanied Narae. KSJ only mentions the three of them (셋이), nothing else.

(Of course, translating this exchange could be really tricky because it’s about a context that only Narae and KSJ are privy of and we’re unfamiliar to, how to introduce a character we potentially know nothing of?)

But the conversation shows:

— That person usually accompanied Narae to see her father (and probably picked her up from school first & walked the dog together) ; that explains why the subject is omitted in the conversation because it’s implied from their daily life.

— They sounded like an adult habitually swamped with what looks like a usually time-consuming work (which excludes Jihoon)

— They seemed close enough to both Narae & KSJ (who jokingly says it’ll be a father-daughter date if they don’t come), dinner with them sounded customary.

— We know it couldn’t be about KSJ’s ‘late wife’ as Min Jiyoung comments ‘It must be hard for him to raise a girl by himself’ as they’re driving home from the conference.

— It has been highlighted twice already how hard, to society/KSJ’s surroundings, raising a girl by himself must be: first with Min Jiyoung’s housekeeper in ep5 (‘They felt sorry for me for raising my daughter alone, so they would share food with me sometimes.’), then Min Jiyoung herself in ep7. Whoever that was, this person also might've helped KSJ to raise Narae unbeknownst to everyone else.

So it was supposed to be someone close to the two of them.

(2) Kim Muchan?

In the same episode, when KMC said Choi Jinsu knew what kind of relationship he had with KSJ, CJS later described it as a ‘close relationship’ (가까은 사이), the same adjective KSJ uses to describe KMC in the present (see in a previous post the notes on 가깝다).

KMC is also the one shown in the very next scenes working hard to bust drug scenes (to the point of eating those painkillers like it’s popcorn). It’s also highly likely the other cases we saw on the news were also recklessly solved by him. (Also the ‘Lives Here.’ on the mirror is a fitting detail to his workaholic side!)

He's still the same in the present and brings work at home. Even though he gets around the law to arrest culprits, the reputation he has now can also attest to the fact he’s still relentlessly absorbed by his work.

This was indeed how Jodan described KMC to Joohyun:

« (…) aka. Wipeout. Pressuring criminals to admit more crimes. Making a case bigger to take more credit. He somehow makes cases into special ones. That’s how he made his way up to Seoul from the south. The master of promotions. (…) Based on his arrest rate, he should be at the top, but those up there must hate him. »

And KMC was close enough to KSJ and Narae to firmly believe Narae would never run away from home, like family would say ; KSJ was the only person he trusted and looked up to.

Not to mention KSJ was completely tensed as Choi Jinsu interrogated him but relaxed once KMC took over, letting out a sigh of relief and dropping his guard to cry.

EDIT: KMC also knew calling KSJ 'hyung' instead of 'Professor' would eventually make him react, as he was lifeless and caught in his thoughts so far.

(3) How long did KMC know KSJ?

KSJ began teaching at KNPU in 2008, which means KMC and him must’ve known each other for at least 7+ years (it’d be 15+ years in the present): ‘Have you forgotten? I said I’d be your number one fan. I said that at your first lecture at KNPU.’

Also KSJ is 44 years old btw, I missed that detail in ep4 when KMC checked his files!

♦ Relationships conveyed through pictures

It’s interesting how the drama keeps highlighting the importance of KSJ and KMC’s relationship, but there’s (yet) no picture to materialize this truth in people’s eyes, while the other significant relationships are framed in the drama:

-> Joohyun’s family portrait and a picture of Joohyun and Joomin in the present.

-> KMC picture with someone who might be his mother.

-> Many pictures of KSJ and Narae filled the house’s walls and the furniture and there was a picture of Narae and Jihoon with the handmade bunny toys hanging on their backpack.

And even though nobody might’ve heard of KSJ adopting Jihoon soon at the time (except KMC), he was present in Narae’s drawings by her and KSJ’s side. And he also drew the three of them together.

-> Min Jiyoung’s family portrait was ostentatiously exhibited in the past & is still used to build her image for her campaign. But there’s also a small portrait with only her and LMS at her apartment in the present.

KSJ and KMC’s relationship evades common portrayal. (Not to mention family portraits are often shown in dramas to foreshadow underlying dynamics between its members!)

The only picture we were shown of them was on the day KSJ was sent to prison:

♦ KSJ’s health and military service

On KSJ’s resume (first picture), you can see he was exempted of military duty.

Indeed, what’s written on the left column under his military status is 미필 (incompletion, if he had been discharged after completing his military duty, it would be written 군필), and the rank and service term columns are empty.

I can’t quite make out everything that’s under the last column for the reason of incompletion, but I read 기형 (deformity), 친환 (one’s parent illness) and 변재 (accident) … ?

However what we learned when KMC checked his medical files in ep4 (third picture) was that he’s got asthma (천식) and primary spontaneous pneumothorax (일차성 자연기흉) ie. occurring without an apparent cause when there’s originally no known lung disease while there’s a preexisting lung disease when it’s secondary.

« Until now the cause of primary spontaneous pneumothorax (PSP) has not been identified, however; several risk factors have been identified such as; smoking, male sex, and a family history of pneumothorax ».

So he was probably exempted due to his long-time health issue (asthma, lung collapse), and maybe KSJ’s family had a history of pneumothorax.

♦ Who is Gaetal?

Is LMS really Gaetal? Are Fan no. 1 & Gaetal different people?

As I said in a previous post, the drama plays with the bias that everything must’ve been done by the same individual/a same group with the same intentions, so it’s possible:

Gaetal in the video test

Gaetal in the prerecorded votes, at least the first one (because the tone, gesture and expressions seemed different compared to the two next votes)

Gaetal broadcasted live (for Cpt. Oh’s vote)

Fan no. 1 who wrote the letters to KSJ

Fan no. 1 JJW said he was working with who described KSJ as the one they admired the most but also said they destroyed the person he loved the most, so he must hate them

Are different people in some cases, meaning:

— The ‘Fan no. 1’ Jung Jinwook worked with might not be LMS, since they never met each other

— It could be Jihoon, or at the very least, he’s an accomplice (there’s this exchange with Joohyun about the shift from an accessory to an accomplice, it could be foreshadowing). He’s well-versed in hacking, he most likely ‘admired’ KSJ and feels guilty over Narae’s death (and probably over BWT’s murder by KSJ), as KSJ said to KMC:

« — [Narae and Jihoon] were supposed to meet that day. — Yes, he thinks all of this happened because he was late. He’s still in shock. »

(He could’ve been the one to have faced Narae’s picture down!)

We don’t know his whereabouts for these 8 years but he must’ve been in contact with KSJ at least once since what happened and given KSJ’s reaction when KMC asked him if he contacted him.

Also Jihoon was definitely searching for KSJ before Joohyun interrupted him when he was at the Police Agency at the end of the episode.

He looked like he definitely knew the content of the ‘video test’ too (or recognized the room), he seemed dumbfounded to learn Joomin found it in ep3:

Determined to help, a part of him could’ve held KMC guilty of the chain of events 8 years ago. KSJ entrusted his handmade bunny toy to KMC and said:

« He said he made them himself, so there are only two of them. Whoever has Narae’s is the murderer, so he told me to use this to catch him. He left this with me. I’m counting on you. »

And KSJ must have some part in whatever is happening now with the Killing Vote: after all, we never got the reason KSJ went out of prison in ep4 (‘If they find out what I did instead of performing labor, they might believe the suspicions are true.’).

-> This scene in ep3 (the first set of pictures on the left): of course this shows his relief because he still cares for KMC but it seemed like he somehow already knew for a fact KMC was out of danger, even before the janitor said he was barely hanging on and not off the hook at all.

— This was even before the video of KMC was revealed to the public in the next episode ;

— The present Gaetal might have informed him in advance a police officer got involved in the bombing against their will, without revealing it was KMC. This would explain why KSJ seemed genuinely surprised when the janitor said it was KMC (the last two pictures of the set) ;

— Someone else could have informed him even if it seems difficult from the prison (but we know he got lots of privileges there and we still don’t know what he did for the warden ; the visit register could have been fabricated and someone indeed met him) ;

— It’s worth pointing out KSJ was convinced KMC was Gaetal up until ep6, which adds another layer to this scene.

-> His reaction in ep5 was also curious (the second set of pictures on the right), he only got perplexed for the video test, as though he was well-acquainted with the rest of whatever was going on except for that one detail (which adds to the theory that Gaetal in the video test ≠ Gaetal in the Killing Vote/Fan no. 1).

Curiously, as I said just above, while KSJ seemed unaware of the video test's existence, Jihoon looked familiar with its content on the contrary.

KSJ never outright denied he was Gaetal eg. his interview with Joohyun in ep2:

«  — ‘Devils who were deemed innocent.’ The phrase that the killer used… You were the first one to say it, weren’t you? I think the killer has something to do with you. — The two people who used the same phrase must be connected. That’s such a naive approach. »

Ep6 only showed KSJ hoped KMC was Gaetal.

And you wouldn’t say KMC’s ‘I’m a cop.’ is a real answer too. Hate to admit it, but KMC stayed silent when KSJ wanted to confirm he was sincere: his feelings might be genuine, but denying he’s Gaetal could very well be a lie.

As for KMC’s front ie. keeping silent when asked about his relationship with KSJ, I guess it comes from his determination to solve all this by his own hands this time: he knows they would take him off the case otherwise. (And for some reason, I can’t help but also suspect Joohyun aaaaa we still don’t know anything about her past!!)

KMC or KSJ, one of the two might be related somehow ; if so, I guess they’d be trying to plan something without the other knowing in order not to involve them and also because the other would disapprove (eg. KSJ to put an end to KMC’s guilt ; KMC to offer some peace to KSJ after all the tragedy and his past mistakes).

— Plus, the Gaetal of the first vote sounded suspiciously like KSJ (his silhouette and gait too) eg. t h a t tremulous voice when he gets angry (the actor plays a lot with that in his roles overall).

— The first vote was prepared from a redevelopment area and BGC was murdered there (pictures on the right).

In ep7, in addition to the video accusing KSJ of being dubious and the witness statement, Narae being found in a redevelopment area was what made the police suspect KSJ of murdering her, since he was known for standing up against said building’s demolition:

« You’d been to the place where the body was found, right? Don’t even think about lying. We know you protested against demolishing that building. »

(Even before Joohyun showed him the Gaetal video test, KMC must’ve had his suspicions from BGC’s murder scene and the broadcast after the body was found eg. recognizing KSJ’s tone, 'the devils deemed innocent' or the ‘rational justice’!)

Narae might’ve been found in the lower part of the building BGC’s vote was prepared in: even though the first story doors were repainted in red and handrails were added to the bridge, the overall architecture and the sort of electricity meter/letter box on the ground floor look the same.

And even without it being the same building, it holds enough resemblance for it to seem like a disturbing recall of the events 8 years ago, combined with Gaetal’s keywords.

— LMS could’ve killed BGC’s wife as Gaetal's copycat at first but that still wouldn’t explain his involvement to the Killing Vote, saying he would give it to his mother as a present.

(But his conversation with KMC when he interviewed him in the present really gave me the impression he knew something about KMC we were not shown, and that could foreshadow what'll happen in the next episode!)

— About LMS’s true perception of justice: we never got to hear his opinion, Narae came running to her father and KSJ interrupted the conversation. So far, the drama didn’t show if his ideals align with Gaetal’s for example, but some elements in the flashbacks clearly show it could be the case.

In fact, his notes about ‘proper justice’ could align with Gaetal’s concept of vigilantism to make up for a failing official retributive justice.

And his ‘If you pass judgment without looking at things clearly, it’s not being fair. It’s being indifferent.’ clearly parallels KSJ’s opinion in the present (ep6):

« Lady Justice wears a blindfold because she’s afraid of bias in decisions. That always bothered me. If you don’t look at cases and the people involved clearly, how can one pass fair judgment? Can judgments without experience be right? Only after losing my daughter did I realize I was qualified to judge others. »

KSJ’s past self would’ve been moderate and warned him however: ‘Relying solely on your experiences can also lead to bias. Experiences are gained through situations and conflicts. They can’t be absolute truths.’

But this detail is something KMC doesn’t know, he instead focuses on LMS’s elitism because he didn’t have those kinds of exchanges with him.

♦ ‘No. 1 Fan’ & LMS

So…………………… You mean to tell me « No. 1 Fan » was originally a memory both KSJ and KMC held dear? That LMS chose this very nickname as a penname for the 5 whole years he sent letters to KSJ? That LMS described KSJ to JJW as the man he admired the most, just like KMC said in that exchange.......... ?

There’s literally no way in hell LMS didn’t listen KMC and KSJ’s conversation ; « no. 1 Fan » could be common in any other cases but not in this one: LMS made everyone around KSJ gone from the picture, it wouldn’t surprise me KMC was/is meant to be the next (LMS even describes him as a ‘cockroach’ hard to kill in ep5).

As to how he got to learn all that, bugging one of the two’s communications/belongings/Narae’s room (eg. that ‘My Daddy My Hero’ seems to be the only thing taken from the house, or the device Jodan found in the ceiling, as it’s totally covered with dust) or even hiding in KSJ’s house that day and listening to their exchange wouldn’t be that surprising given what he did and how he seems to enjoy playing recklessly.

What Jodan found looks like the kind of device that transmits frequencies to another device (eg. cell phone, a recorder prepared to this end).

In this episode, we saw LMS watched everything among the crowd each time (when Narae’s body was found, when KSJ was sent to prison), there could very well be times he watched unnoticed from KMC or KSJ.

I guess he learned about the ‘rational justice’ the same way: he could’ve heard the ‘devils deemed innocent’ from his mother or some other way (eg. if he hacked the court’s archives, he could’ve found the trial transcripts), but ‘rational justice’ was something only KSJ and KMC knew about (at least, at this point of the drama).

Given his obsession for KSJ, LMS could benefit from deliberately using a precious memory that KSJ could only attribute to KMC and posing as KMC: that would finally make him assume a special position in KSJ’s eyes (and it worked: that’s probably why KSJ firmly believed Gaetal and/or the one who wrote him letters was KMC).

And he probably deludes himself into believing it was originally his by right, not Narae’s, not KMC’s nor anyone else’s (I don’t think he knew Jihoon even if he observed the house): he considers himself KSJ’s only entitled Fan no. 1.

At the same time, becoming Gaetal, a figure that would finally bring the justice to KSJ which KMC failed to do, gives him the opportunity to finally ‘judge’/destroy KMC as he wished. Eg. making him the next Killing Vote target by showing people he was deceiving them (his ‘Wipeout’ reputation) ; or distorting facts about his involvement in Narae’s case (just like the video Min Jiyoung/LMS made on KSJ to divert the attention off her son).

And this seems to be the case in the preview:

The screen on the left side of the shot displays an edit of KMC (which looks like those Gaetal did for the previous targets ; the picture seems to come from when the journalists gathered at the prison when they learned he was alive), and if I’m not mistaken you can read on the banner « 속였습니다 » (‘I/He deceived/lied to [the people maybe?]’), which might be a reference to what he said in ep4 where he also used 속였습니다.

♦ « This house had good natural lighting »

Losing Narae left KSJ lifeless. In this episode’s flashback, his profile, livid, is blinded by white light, like a ghost.

Even though he stood in Narae’s room, he was perhaps longing for the house that was already not there anymore and that initially had ‘good natural lighting’, as Joohyun said in ep4. It symbolized all the happiness he shared with Narae.

And KMC could only witness, helpless, KSJ’s grief.

In retrospect, on the second set of pictures to the right, the sight of KSJ’s silhouette in a similar setting and lighting (when KSJ was transferred to the Police Agency, ep5) might’ve reminded KMC of this memory.

The drama highlighted this theme in other previous scenes too. They have in common a silhouette shot in an overall dark setting facing a strong backlighting.

[And you can notice the shots get gradually brighter as the drama progresses and KSJ gets out of prison!]

Joohyun's scene on the top right was so beautifully shot... !

-> When KSJ is transferred to the Police Agency ;

-> When Joohyun interviews KSJ and makes him listen to Mozart’s Requiem in ep4. And also KMC’s reaction we could better understand in retrospect as he listened (the pictures on the bottom right) ;

-> When KSJ enjoyed the light from the prison in ep4 ;

-> When he looked outside from his cell’s window while meditating in the first episode ;

-> When KMC wanted to visit KSJ but he refused to meet him in ep2 (and we can once again better interpret his expressions in retrospect to ep7).

Note: in ep3, KMC’s reaction to the tagged wall (‘the 13th was wrong’) and the news articles about the case from 8 years ago could also now be interpreted as pained in retrospect ; his surprise upon discovering this also shows it’s at least not him who messed the room that way. If he cared for Narae as this episode showed, he probably wouldn’t have damaged her room. It's also maybe relevant to note again that the video test didn't have the tagged wall!

♦ Min Jiyoung’s classism

Whatever Min Jiyoung found on KMC was something she did not approve according to her standards: she went from ‘that detective’ when she first met him to ‘bastard like you/the likes of you’ at the end of the trial.

I get BIG classist undertones when she speaks to him, and it's not the sole occurrence:

-> When she fired her previous aide because he advised her in a way she deemed unsatisfactory, she commented: ‘촌스러운 새끼’ which was translated to ‘What a loser.’ The adjective she used is 촌스럽다 (unpolished, countrified, dowdy ie. « one’s attitude or taste being unsophisticated and looking like that of a country person »).

The Naver Dictionary also gives the expression ‘촌스러운 사람’ and translates it as ‘a lout, rustic, clodhopper, boor’.

새끼 means offspring (cub or child/kid), but it’s often used as an insult to mean someone’s a jerk/bastard/etc. which is the case here (eg. 개새끼, SOB/bastard).

-> The housekeeper: KSJ described her as ‘도우미’ (assistant, helper) and was getting along well with her and her husband (‘They felt sorry for me for raising my daughter alone, so they would share food with me sometimes. (…) Though we didn’t know each other very well, we were quite close.’).

And Min Jiyoung, who lives with her and her family, calls her…… an expense (‘비용’) if I’m hearing well (at the very least, it doesn’t sound like any of the words commonly used for housekeepers eg. 가정부, 도우미, 파출부, 하녀…), and it could explain why KMC made her repeat.

-> She used 너 같은 새끼 to insult KMC (‘bastards like you/the likes of you’), right after calling LMS his son (아들), which could imply the latter qualifies more as a person than him. She even deems him a taint/테인트 threatening to spoil their status/reputation.

-> She said to LMS in ep5: ‘[KMC] must be trying to make ends meet. You better stay away from those vermins.’

And be it a coincidence or not, Jihoon’s grandmother was also judgmental towards Joohyun and her sister (ep4, first set of pictures).

Her reaction to KSJ’s idea (she was taken aback and raised her eyebrow then looked embarrassed as she tried to answer) could also be explained by some distance she wants to put between her and disreputable people (ep6, second set of pictures).

Gaetal targeted the rich so far (‘The law that is more harsh on victims than on criminals… It feeds like a parasite off of money and power, so the ones who deserve to die are still alive.’), like some sort of Robin Hood as KMC commented.

♦ « Hyung »

(breaking my silence once again…) KMC and KSJ were lovers/KMC was in love and they were in their domestic life bubble (and ngl that ‘… [and the one] I look up to.’ delivery with that hesitant interruption felt like a left out confession)

The scene in Narae’s room was paralleled in the present at the end of the episode:

You can notice with this comparison that most (if not all) of KSJ & KMC’s scenes in the present are submerged by blue tones in the prison cell and at the Police Agency, just like in the lyrics of the new OST with the wordplay on the color blue and feeling blue! eg. 눈을 감아보면 I see blue — 그런 너의 모습에 feel so blue (When I close my eyes I see blue — At the sight of you feel so blue) 네게 가려진 난 I see blue — 몰랐던 너의 모습에 feel so blue (I’m covered/obscured by you I see blue — This side of you I didn’t know feel so blue)

♦ Gaetal, masks and dogs

Gaetal could be translated as ‘dog mask’ (개, dog + 탈, mask).

GAETAL AND MASKS

Gaetal’s excentric and playful, Robin Hood-esque character and their theatrics could be a reference to the traditional Korean masks.

« [Korean masks] were used in war, on both soldiers and their horses ; ceremonially, for burial rites in jade and bronze and for shamanistic ceremonies to drive away evil spirits/illness/bad luck out of an individual or a village (often horrifying or grotesque to invoke fear and humor), to remember the faces of great historical figures, and in the arts, particularly in ritual dances, courtly, and theatrical plays. The present uses are as miniature masks for souvenirs, or on phones hung as good-luck talismans. There are two ways to categorize masks: religious masks and artistic masks. »

Indeed, KSJ had a glass display of Korean masks in his house (it’s a limited Seoul 1988 Olympic Games Korean Masks Collection):

Masks are in fact known to be used in talchum/talnori (mask dance/play), an art developed after a cultural shift in society: masks were initially used in religious activities, but entertainment and festivities factored in through time.

« An ensemble of musicians accompanies masked performers who humorously explore social issues through dramatic combinations of cheerful, energetic and rhythmical songs, dances, movements and dialogue. »

They mostly originated from the pre-modern society of the Joseon dynasty. The country was governed by a rigid social hierarchy (eg. the aristocracy and the buddhist monastic hierarchy) and a strict patriarchal system. They sharply criticized contemporary society with satire and witty humour, depicting the falsehoods and hypocrisies of the upper classes (eg. decadent noblemen, apostate/depraved monks, patriarchal husbands) but also mocked stereotypical versions of annoying personalities within the lower classes (eg. the drunkard, the gossip, the flirt of the complaining grandmother). It offered people both catharsis and important life lessons, and masks are a key means to do that.

On the nobleman mask (Master Kim Dongpyo, maker of Hahoetal): « yangban noblemen prioritize dignity and saving face above all else. The gentle curves of a Hahoe yangban mask embody this character. » In other local traditions, noblemens’ masks may express greedy and pretentious personalities.

Talchum offered an opportunity to commoners to unleash their pent-up emotions, their suppressed anger and for the governing class to hear the people’s complaints, ultimately promoting greater unity within society. Their will for resistance is voiced.

Gaetal's apparent intentions correspond to all this to a great extent.

« Once a person dons a mask – men and women, young and old, nobility and commoners – all are freed from social conventions and restrictions. The appearance of the Korea mask itself is also liberated by convention. Nevertheless, everyone manages to find a part of the mask with which they can identify. In this way the mask is truly the face of the heart's hidden desires. (…) Korean masks are grotesque and vividly colored. Masks are painted in vivid primary colors, representing both the individual personality and social class of the character as well as his or her age and gender eg. black & dark for an elderly character ; red & bright for a young character ; white for a young female character. In terms of personality, a red, darkly-colored mask represents recklessness and aggressiveness; a yellow or lightly-colored mask characterizes foolishness and incompetence ; and a black or darkly-colored mask exemplifies an anxious, socially marginalized character. To symbolize a character's duplicity, masks are sometimes painted half red and half white. »

[For posterity, in the drama, Gaetal’s mask is fully white ; we also don’t know Gaetal’s gender, Joohyun evokes this possibility, it could very well be herself, Min Jiyoung or her assistant, even Jihoon’s grandmother ; Min Jiyoung’s attention to her clothes also reflects the good/evil duality with her outfit at BWT’s final trial.]

Professor Heo Yongho, Korea National University of Arts: « Korean mask-dance dramas deal with such universal themes as freedom and equality. However, they present these common subjects in a distinctively dynamic and exciting way. »

All these emotions, ambitions and desires can therefore be put on display without fear or shame. The characters mock and satirize the duplicity and foolishness of the ruling class and pray for a new world and a better future, like Gaetal does in the Killing Vote.

This page even theorizes 탈 derived from the Chinese character for ‘to rid/free oneself from something’.

« Korea adopted Chinese characters prior to the invention of their own, unique alphabet under King Sejong (1397-1450), and still use Chinese characters extensively. Thereby, the original meaning of the talnori or talchum, is a play or dance that helps shed ones stress and grief. Originally talnori was performed at night, often in a clearing around a fire and the exaggerated colors and expressions on some of the masks reflect a time when such vibrant colors and expressions were necessary to make them visible in the poor light. » [This bit could be relevant later on in this point when I’ll talk about the moon and the fire symbolism!]

The interaction with the audience is important, it completes the performance. As the UNESCO page describes: « talchum performances do not require a formal stage: any empty space can become a venue. The audience plays an essential role, contributing to the production with their cheers and jeers as the drama unfolds. »

Talchum players improvise their lines and actions in response to the spectators, quickly forming a bond together.

In a distorted fashion, the Killing Vote seems to strongly rely on the country’s participation to vote for the ‘judgement’ of the culprit, introduced as corrupt and deeply irredeemable people (even though we know the reality is more ambiguous: two broadcasts were pre-recorded and pretty compelling cases were deliberately chose to obtain an unanimous vote, not to mention Gaetal’s true intention eg. if they’re LMS).

The country even becomes an entertained audience in addition to their participation: each vote brings its fair share of debates, cries of support, admiration, disgust, anticipation or emulation. The Killing Vote becomes an outlet to everyone's fears, anger, frustration.

Gaetal's judgment of 'devils that were deemed innocent' by a failing legitimate system which would even condone their deed inflames passions: revealing the culprit's corrupt side in a sarcastic, unfiltered fashion the conventional society would (or could) never dare to do makes people look up to Gaetal.

It also makes people relate to Gaetal because the votes serve as an example that they wish was applied to their own tragedies eg. Joohyun, KSJ, Joomin & Jihoon. Exemplifying the 'judgment' of their cases could be seen as a prophylactic step to 'exorcise' the deep-rooted evil and appease the tormented souls of their victims.

And Gaetal engages with the people with a witty and sarcastic speech, and sounds deeply concerned with people’s opinion (again, it could be false pretenses) eg. when they cautioned sensitive souls to close the video as its content might be too violent ; when they got angry as they read forums after KMC was thought dead ; when they broadcasted the video revealing KMC was alive.

The Killing Vote also seems to touch on people’s duplicity, hidden desires and ambitions in society eg. especially KSJ, KMC, Min Jiyoung, LMS and people’s ambivalence in the face of good and evil (everybody has in them the risk of becoming a ‘Gaetal’ or one of their targets if faced with certain opportunities and circumstances) as I talked about it in a previous post (’The Killing Vote and a vigilantism built on a twisted basis’).

The hahoetal (Hahoe [Village] masks) are one of the most known Korean masks, designated as national treasures.

They were used during a kind of mask dance called 하회별신굿탈놀이, dance drama of Hahoe Village: it’s a shamanic dance drama passed down from the mid-12th century & performed to appease the local deity, pray for the village’s peace and wellbeing as well as a good harvest. It is said to be one of the oldest mask dances known in Korea.

It's a play in satire and humor directed at the ruling class from the religious perspective of praying fortune. The masks represent 12 stock characters needed to perform the roles in the ritual dance dramas included in the ceremony (eg. the monk, the scholar, the bride, the aristocrat …).

Their origin is not clearly known, but a legend about their original design exists.

« In the middle of the Goryeo Dynasty, there lived a craftsman, Heo. For years his village suffered from misfortunes but no one knew why. One day, he dreamt about a mountain god, receiving an oracle message that the misfortunes would disappear if the villagers danced with masks made by Heo. The god said he was not to have any contact with anyone until he finished. Heo then had a straw rope wound around his workshop to allow him to work undisturbed and immediately set to work. One hundred days had passed. A young woman named Kim was in love with Heo and was growing weary of waiting. She broke her vow to leave him undisturbed for one hundred days and peeked into her lover’s workshop to see what he was doing. He was carving the last mask, the scholar's foolish servant, Imae. The moment she glanced inside, Heo collapsed spitting blood and died. The mask was left unfinished, without a chin. Out of guilt for causing his death, the young woman committed suicide. Afterward, the residents of Hahoe village decided to serve the dead woman as a tutelary god and held annual rituals to assuage her soul. »

An annual winter memorial rite is held at dawn of the first full moon of each new year to console their unrealized love, appease their tormented souls and honor them. They would also pray for the well-being of the village and for its protection against evil spirits.

This also seems relevant:

The word 탈 also includes a second meaning of misfortune, illness and difficulty. Eg. when someone becomes sick or runs into trouble, you can use the verb 탈나다 (an accident happens/have a hitch/run into trouble/fall ill/get out of order or go wrong) or the word 탈 which is a homonym of the mask.

« The word for masks represents something that people hope is only a passing event. Interestingly, people were reluctant to hold onto the word 탈 in its meaning of a mask. In the past, they believed that if they kept a mask nearby, they would be in trouble due to the bad luck attached to the mask. Therefore, they stored the masks in a village shrine or burned them immediately after the ritual for which they were created. People regarded masks as religious objects, something that should be feared, worshipped and enshrined. »

But masks were also considered by ancient Koreans as a sacred symbol of the gods (or a particular god): as such, it was especially valued and worshipped, and always kept a certain distance away from living quarters.

In the drama, the mere existence of Gaetal calls for trouble and the police force endeavors to catch them. Gaetal nicknames themselves 'the citizens' watchdog' who will protect them from evil, and is compared to many heroic figures (eg. Robin Hood, Batman, …) but also to God. For example, Jihoon says to Joomin:

« That devil was set free by our incompetent legal system. If he wouldn’t be punished by the law or by God, I thought he should at least be punished by the people. »

The sight of their figure 'should' be feared by the culprits but only Uhm Eungyeong was really scared ; BGC and Cpt. Oh challenged and dared them to actually murder them. But in the end, the latter begged JJW for his life and promised him money, the thing he cared the most for.

This also ties well with the overall Christian symbolism exhibited in LMS’s room or Saint Michael (see the next point!).

GAETAL AND DOGS

As for the dog part, since one of the main plot points is a commentary on justice and the good & evil in people, it might be a reference to the haetae/haechi (해태/해치), a Korean mythological creature often associated for example to the Chinese guardian lions (also called shishi, lion or fu dogs) or the Japanese shishi/komainu.

Symbol of justice and law, the haetae is a hybrid beast: a mix of a lion, dog and dragon covered in scales or fur, wearing a bell and baring its canines, sometimes winged, sometimes with a reptile tail. It possesses the ability to divine and distinguish the true character in people, right from wrong, truth from lies in people.

The horn on its forehead was used to ram into the guilty in an argument.

It is said to feed off fire ; under Joseon, its statues were placed at the entrance of official places like palaces to protect the capital Hanyang (now Seoul, eg. at the National Assembly and the Supreme Prosecutors’ Office) from natural disasters and fires.

« Haetae statues lie on high pedestals at each side of Gwanghwamun, the main gate of Gyeongbokgung Palace (…) [they] represent the Joseon rulers’ political and philosophical ideals of protecting the nation’s dignity by applying the laws strictly and justly and providing peace and stability to all the people without allowing bias or personal feelings to influence decisions. »

This article explains how the Chinese characters for law (법, 法) derived from the ideogram for haechi.

What I gathered from this page is that law was initially written as 灋. Looking at its structure:

— The radical to the left, 氵, is associated to water (水): which means that the law must be as fair as water — The character 去 is placed under the character ‘chi’ 廌, which depicts the haechi. Making a creature said to judge right from wrong a part of the law character brings out its meaning even more.

The character was later simplified by removing the 廌, thus written 法.

[And as I said in a previous post, the hanja 橅, which means law, can be used for the Mu of Muchan!]

The haechi was also closely associated to the Chinese judicial system eg. on decorations and paintings, embroidered on the robes, crowns with a horn. The judicial officers were also named after the haechi.

It has become Seoul’s symbol since 2008.

The haetae is also mainly assimilated to the Chinese xiezhi, a mythical single-horned creature (a sheep, goat or ox) commanded during imperial criminal proceedings to ram into the guilty in the same manner.

Since Gaetal chases after evil, it could also be a reference to a breed of dogs native to the Korean Peninsula, the Sapsali/Sapsalgae.

Their name literally translates to ‘one that roots out evil spirits’ or ‘drives out devils’. Due to their appearance, they’re often associated to the haetae and sometimes called ‘Lion Dogs’.

Lion dances are indeed performed because it was thought lions contained the power to expel evil spirits and bring good luck.

Sapsali are also nicknamed ‘Ghost Hunters’ or’ Sunshine Dogs’.

Some aspects of the drama also involve dogs:

-> Gaetal used a mail address titled ‘watchdog’ that the journalist wanted to use as a catchphrase for her broadcast ;

-> KMC called KSJ their ‘hunting dog’, urging Joohyun to ‘get him off the leash’ ;

-> Narae’s dog LMS killed and all the past dogs of his family ;

-> The scene at the beginning of ep7 shows BWT beaten by Min Jiyoung’s family as his parents watch powerless. The next shot shows the Dalmatian puppy sitting quietly by his neat doghouse as the violent scene continues to unfold before it off-screen. The absence of pictures of BWT’s family in the house unlike the Dalmatian puppy could be interpreted as a further highlight of the family being poorly treated by Min Jiyoung’s family, even worse than a dog. It also aligns with the classist behavior of Min Jiyoung & co.

-> Indeed, 개 is often used as a prefix to an insult (or to emphasize words in slang, but it’s not used in the drama so far eg. 개싫어, ‘[I] freaking/really hate [it]’).

For posterity also, the word ‘mask’ (탈) is also the homonym/paronym of 달 (moon/month) and 딸 (daughter, perhaps a reference to Narae, since the video test seems to be titled after the day she was missing?).

For the 달 (moon/month), the most relevant connection to the Killing Vote is that they’re held every 15th (new moon) and 30th (full moon) of each month. It also ties up with how the talnori/talchum were originally performed at night.

If there’s also some symbolism with the moon, combined to the fire and dogs, the mythical dogs Bulgae (불개, lit. fire dog) might come to mind:

« According to a myth, one of heaven's realms, the kingdom of darkness, was called Gamangnara, the Dark World. Its king was concerned and weary with the perpetual darkness and desired the light of the sun and moon for his kingdom. He sent one of the gigantic fiery hounds, the Bulgae to chase the sun to bring it to his realm. However, when it tried to bite the sun, the sun was too hot, which made the dog unable to hold on to it, resulting in him giving up, and running back to the king, angry at the failure. He sent another more ruthless dog to steal the moon. When the Bulgae tried to carry it in its mouth, the moon was so cold, that the mouth of the dog was icy and frozen, and caused the Bulgae to drop it. The Bulgae tried many times to grab the moon in its mouth, but eventually gave up and ran back to the king in disappointment. The king never gave up this mission though. He continued to send fire dogs that were fiercer than the others, but none were able to collect the sun and moon. According to the Korean eclipse belief, during a solar eclipse or lunar eclipse, the dark sections are the parts where the dogs are biting. When the eclipses are over, the dogs have given up and run away back to its kingdom. »

Noting it down if it’ll hold meaning in the next episodes, we’ve got two scenes shot in the moonlight:

In the first episode when KSJ looks out from his cell’s window and moonlight enters the room ;

Right after KSJ got his health checked by Jihoon’s grandmother in ep6 and Joohyun gets in LMS’s car!

♦ Saint Michael and Kim Muchan

Following the previous point, in the nightclub KMC was investigating, a big statue right behind where he sat sometimes showed up.

It looks like a reproduction of the St. Michael bronze statue by Peter Anton von Verschaffelt on top of the Castel Sant’Angelo in Rome (the set of pictures in the middle).

There are other examples of similar iconography (the two pictures on the right):

— St. Michael defeats Satan by Guido Remi — Fontaine Saint-Michel in Paris (Bvd. Saint-Michel) by Gabriel Davioud, the sculpture, Archangel Michael and the devil, was designed by Francisque-Joseph Duret

I’ll quote this interesting page from EHNE, an online encyclopedia project developed in 2012 by the Sorbonne University.

« Saint Michael was a unique saint. As an archangel, he acted as the preferred messenger between Heaven and Earth. His struggle against the forces of Evil allowed him to serve as both a guardian and a warrior angel. » He’s also depicted as a champion/guardian of justice and a healer of the sick.

'Who is like God?' mmmmh

[What I didn’t know is that he was also considered the patron saint of the police, justice, military and many other trades and places, which is why he’s represented on the Saint Michael pendant!]

« As a victorious angel, defender, overcomer of evil and leader of heavenly armies, Michael the Archangel is often depicted in medieval art as an armored soldier [eg. pteruges, Byzantine armor or a fully feathered body or a mix of both] carrying such arms as a cross-inscribed shield, cross-staff, or the sword or spear he typically employs to fight the dragon during the Apocalypse. Outside of the apocalyptic combat scene, Michael also may be shown trampling and piercing the dragon as part of his overall iconography.  (…) He's also featured in other important episodes, such as the biblical narrative of the Fall of Angels and the Last Judgment [Day of Wrath/Dies Irae, where the just will be welcomed to eternal bliss, separated from the wicked, cast into ‘eternal fire’.]. In Last Judgment scenes, Michael the Archangel is often shown holding the scales of justice laden with good and bad souls. »

This thesis (p. 287 ss.) on Saint Michael’s italian iconography by Clémentine Denèle was also interesting:

[It could align with KMC’s restraint in front of KSJ most of the time, his mainly unreliable narration and expressions you could only interpret in retrospect. The same could be said of KSJ, but it’s less apparent to me: it was strong in the beginning of the drama but by now, KSJ feels less ‘cryptic’ than KMC who’s been hazy the whole time.]

Most of the time, Saint Michael's representations depict him with a neutral expression, totally disconnected to the threat and tension of his whole body engaged in his battle against evil that belie no hesitation: no emotions pass through (eg. compassion, anger, fear, remorse, hesitation, pride, judgment/disgust against the evil’s deeds or the violence he executes), only a solemn severity can be seen. Even for other angel figures of the Christian iconography, feelings were initially expressed through their gestures and hands. This changed at the end of the Middle Ages: angels were depicted with emotions and expressions eg. smiling to suggest their angelic gentleness, especially when represented suffering next to the Christ being crucified. But Saint Michael stays depicted with an impassive/calm expression, at most with a discreet rictus. Clémentine Denèle comments it could be explained by his ethereal nature and superior quality as an angel unlike humans & the overall idealistic representation of angels. She quotes the art historian Jean Wirth: he says the immobility and the impassibility are characteristic of the superior beings, because they convey an abstraction and reflect the stable order of invisible things. To materialize their constant presence by God and humans’ side, angels make themselves visible to the humans by assuming a human form as well. Vivid expressions were exclusive to the damned and the demons. It aligns with the attitude he exhibits in the Epistle of Jude 1:9: « But even the archangel Michael, when he was disputing with the devil about the body of Moses, did not himself dare to condemn him for slander but said, “The Lord rebuke you!” » Passing a partial judgement on the evil is not his mission, Clémentine Denèle says he only assumes his role as God’s armed wing and as such, his faithful obedience and trust in God command quietude under any circumstances: as the executor of divine justice, he knows for a fact his mission is devoted to the good and it must be fulfilled. She reports there were only rare occurrences depicting him with anger and aggressiveness or fear (he’s most of the time confident in the battle’s aftermath), and he’s also rarely present to mourn the Christ as he is crucified: it is not his place.

On a related note, Narae’s name (나래) is the synonym of wing, spelled 날개. 나래 was officially admitted as an alternate orthography for the word in 2011. But from what I gathered, it’s only used in a literary/poetic context, while the common spelling stays 날개.

♦ More on names & hanja

After all these episodes, some hanja that could be used for KMC, KSJ and Joohyun’s names now seem relevant to note:

— For Kim Muchan

-> Mu in Muchan Law (橅 & 膴, 법) as I mentioned in the first post: it aligns with his ambiguous position on justice on the past (‘a rational justice’ that doesn’t follow the official law if it’s unfair) and in the present (manipulating evidence and proceedings to arrest culprits but still handling them within the law, rejecting Gaetal’s ways)

Deceive/lie (誣, 속이다) & fog/mist/haze (霧, 안개): his unreliable narration, the way he deceived people to catch Gaetal in ep4 & the edit that appears in the preview ; KMC now seems even more ambiguous than KSJ.

Full of rumors (楙, 무성하다): his ‘Wipeout’ reputation

Rough/violent/tough (蕪, 거칠다): his overall reckless and violent behavior as he works

Work hard/try hard and strive/work/endeavor ie. devote oneself and contribute to doing sth (務, 힘쓰다): self-explanatory given what we saw in this episode, combined with the shots of his house and the first episode that explains his reputation!

Stroke/touch/caress with hands and figuratively soothe ie. calm down sb with warm words and acts (憮, 어루만지다 and 애무하다 which can have a romantic tone = caress, stroke affectionately ie. for sb to gently stroke the one they love): his overall restraint to reach out to KSJ and guilt over being too late to save Narae. The new OST’s lyrics also refer to those kinds of feelings (whoever the narrator is), especially ‘Let me hold your hand, 더 가까이 너를’ (‘Let me hold your hand, Closer to you’), ‘익숙치않은 이런 내 모습 미안해’ (‘I’m sorry for this unfamiliar me [I showed you]’) and ‘Oh, please tell me why — 더는 네게 — 늦지 않게’ (‘Oh, please tell me why — I won’t be late for you anymore’).

EDIT: also, some shots indeed focus on KSJ's hands as he buries himself in them to cry in front of KMC!

House (廡, 집): KSJ’s house he seems to know pretty well and possibly holds precious memories to him, and his own house he doesn’t seem to tend to, probably out of guilt (see a previous post, ‘On the frames facing down (ep. 1 & 6), shame and guilt’)

Warrior (ie. person who learns martial arts and practices it as a job) & soldier/military/army (武, 무사 & 병사 respectively): his potential association to St. Michael who led heavenly armies + for posterity, if they reveal later in the drama he also knows martial arts and it somehow involves him with the Killing Vote (the first episode & ep3 at least showed he was quite agile)

Shaman (巫, 무당 ; though the word is mainly associated to female shamans, male shamans can also be called mudang): a shaman « employs magic to effect cures, to tell fortunes, to soothe spirits of the dead, and to repulse evil »

Dance (舞, 춤추다): like… the talchum… masks… in addition to the shaman... you know… haha

— For Kwon Seokju

-> Kwon [You can also apply relevant meanings to Narae, since it’s her last name]

Prison (圈, 감방): both physical and figurative ever since Narae died and he murdered BWT

Abstain/refrain from ie. be careful about one’s speech or behavior (惓, 삼가다): his overall behavior in the present

Tired/exhausted/weary (倦, 고달프다): what he wen through these whole 8 years

Take care of/look after/oversee, heartfelt/caring (惓, 정성스럽다) & warm/friendly: self-explanatory about his character in general when we see his past self with Narae, Jihoon & KMC, and other people in general (BWT’s parents, LMS, his students) before Narae’s case

Loyal/devoted (惓, 충성스럽다): devoted wholeheartedly to his family

Look back/reflect on the past (睠, 돌아보다): also self-explanatory

-> Seok in Seokju

Untie (釋, 풀다 ie. return what has been tied, bound, or twisted back to its original state)/relieve anger or sorrow/get rid of one’s agony by handling it : he’s still waiting for the accomplice to Narae’s murder to be arrested to find some closure after all those years, he perhaps also wants to put an end to it all for KMC to stop feeling guilty over the case.

Night (夕, 밤), tide (汐, 조수 ie. seawater flowing in and out from the shore because of the gravitational pull of the sun and moon) & tideland (潟, 개펄 ie. wide expanse of mud revealed when the tide goes down): [if the moon and sun imagery holds some meaning in the drama] ; also, most of KSJ’s scenes in the beginning were shot in the dark compared to the bright scenes with Narae and Jihoon

... The Mont Saint-Michel is known to be a tidal island and for its fog haha

-> Ju in Seokju [You can apply the relevant meanings to Joohyun too]

House (宙, 집): the house that had good natural lighting (Narae, Jihoon and perhaps KMC) he cherished is now gone, it is derelicted after all these years

Bear/endure/put up with ie. endure sth for a long time, resist (拄, 버티다): self-explanatory too

Sunlight/sunbeam/sunshine (晭, 햇빛): the shots of him mourning or basking in the light

Timely rain but also heavy rain/downpour (澍, 단비 and 폭우) & wick and burn out ie. burn and eliminate sth (炷, 심지 & 불사르다) as I mentioned in the first post!

The fire imagery is also present with Joohyun’s character and her scar.

It’s associated to the tragedy she had to live, and we could project the same theme to KMC & KSJ who went through the same, all linked by this ‘terrible rage’ still waiting to be put out.

The hanja 火 (which is what 炷, the hanja for wick/burn out is composed of) is associated to anger (화, anger, fury) and fire (불).

Given the previous posts, you can also link it to the haetae (symbol of justice which feeds off fire, is said to prevent fires) or the eternal fire at the Last Judgment.

— For Joohyun

-> Hyun in Joohyun

Snoop/nose around (俔, 염탐하다): self-explanatory hahaha

Bright ie. a place being light as a result of getting a lot of sun/light or brilliant (adj.)/break or dawn but also fig. cheerful/bright (炫, 밝다), sunlight/sunbeam/sunshine (昡, 햇빛 and 晛, 햇살) and kind-hearted/benevolent (賢, 어질다): self-explanatory for this lovely character!!

Wise/sagacious/sensible (賢, 현명하다): she has a soothing and mature side to her eg. as she talked to KMC & Jihoon

Clever/bright/intelligent (儇, 영리하다): self-explanatory too!!

Connect/link/join (縣, 연결하다, can also be used for people): she seems to connect with people around her with ease, and she looks like she’s trying to reconnect KMC to KSJ

♦ « The person Kwon Seokju cherished the most »

I don’t know where this will lead, but KMC JJW’s quote in ep6 as he relayed it to KSJ: initially, it was about ‘the person KSJ loved the most’ (가장 ���랑하는 사람 ; 사랑하다 = love/care ie. cherish, value, and care for sb with all one’s heart).

KMC quoted it as ‘the person KSJ cherished the most’ (가장 소중한 사람 ; 소중하다 = valuable/precious/cherished/dear): while the two adjectives almost mean the same thing, ‘cherished’ feels more personal than the general ‘loved’ (사랑하다 is also used a lot) and conveys the invaluable dearness better in this situation to me.

[avislux]

Anime Expo 2023 recap

Well it's long since I've lost my fervant passion for Bocchi The Rock. I still love it, just not to the extent that I'm thinking of it every second. I went to Anime Expo 2023 for 4 days, and thoroughly enjoyed it. Made some friends. Got to see Rie Takahashi in person. I wish I was more excited for that but I was excited enough.

Day 1

Panels all day long. Got up to 6 to arrive in LA around 7:20. Encountered some traffic on the way surprisingly, so I made a note to get up earlier. Lined up for the queue to get in then for the first panel of the day, Colorful Stage with Tomori Husonoki and Hinata Sato. Unfortunately I don't know these two seiyuu that well. I downloaded the game but haven't played it yet. Dunno if I will, I have enough time invested in gacha games. They basically talked about the game and answered some trivia about it. The voice actors visited Santa Monica and they said it was like a pilgrimage for a Japanese show that was shot there. Next up went to the Eminence in Shadow S2 premiere which had Cid's VA Seiichirou Yamashita. I got in while the panel was on going so I missed part of it. Apparently he speaks decent English. Kind of an entertaining guy I think. He didn't say "I am atomic," though. Then saw the first ep of S2. Checked out the entertainment hall for a bit before lining up for the next panel. To my surprise and excitement, they were playtesting Taiko no Tatsujin. Apparently I was the first person to do Oni difficulty. Lined up for the TOHO Animation panel after. Room was full though I barely got in. I was lowkey hoping they would announce something for Takagi-san with Rieri on the panel but that was not the case. They showed some upcoming shows such as JJK, spice and wolf. Last was Spy family, which Takuya Eguchi appeared for. I was walking out to line up for the spy family panel up until Eguchi appeared. Then I stayed. Spy Family Panel with Eguchi was right after that. A friend saved a seat so I got to be near the front. He basically answered a bunch of questions about himself and the show. Did a live reading of one of the lines in the first episode where he is in the train. He also did another scene I think it was about protecting children. He's pretty entertaining. I've listened to the Spy Family radio so I'm kinda used to hearing him. He really likes drinking. Half his answers were related to beer. What's the best way to eat peanuts? With beer. They also gave away a shikishi with his "absolute masterpiece" of a drawing. "Do you guys really want this?" he asked. After the panel, played some Taiko in the entertainment hall. Saw a real pro FC Hibana Ura. Lined up for the Mashle panel. They had the EN and JP voice out for this. Aleks Le apparently went to Japan to work with Kobayashi. They made molds of their fists. No cream puffs though. I'm not the biggest fan of Mashle. I like gag humor but the show's humor doesn't really hit for me. Aleks wore a robe out and brought one for Kobayashi.

Day 2

First was Twisted Wonderland panel. I do not play or care for it, I just wanted to see the voice actors. It has a more female demographic it seems. It was Natsuki Nanae, Chiaki Kobayashi, and someone else I forgot. They did some trivia on stage. Got to check out the exhibits today. Found a lot of bocchi stuff. Lined up for the CDawgVA panel with Ironmouse. Not a huge fan but I saw a clip of them last year and it seemed good. I lined up 30 mins in advance rather than the typical hour. The line went out the hotel. It was fun. Although I wish I left it early as I needed to catch the next panel. The Yakuza panel filled up, I didn't think it would. A lot of people were there to camp for the FGO panel that was next. I watched the panel on stream instead while in line. Strangely, once the doors closed, the line collapsed on itself. Anyway, I got to be on the right most side for the FGO panel and I was able to get into that. I don't care about FGO at all but I needed to see my oshi. She covered her mouth with her hands as she walked out due to all the cheering. The panel itself wasn't very smooth though. It seemed very awkward for the guests. It seemed like they answered questions the guy wasn't asking. Not sure. Overall the guests didn't talk much so they didn't seem like they were necessary for the panel. I just stared at Rieri all the time. She tends to make a lot of cute gestures as others are talking. The panel itself announced a bunch of Fate stuff and updates for the game, none of which I cared about. RIERIIII.

Day 3

I woke up particularly early today for the Rurouni Kenshin panel. Needed to line up early then book it to the queue for the event hall. It worked, I got seated near the front. And for the moment, I was happy. I got to see Rieri up close. She apparently shopped at vintange stores while Soma Saito bought a guitar. Apparently Rieri only addresses Saito as Saito-san whereas she uses "kun" for others. First time for both of them to be in America. Overall a better panel than the FGO one. They got to talk a good amount. I'm trying to remember more from the panel but it's not coming up. It was a good panel though I hope they release the vod somewhere. I checked out the Aniplex and A1 panel for a bit before dipping to explore everything. Had to line up for the Yamada panel at least an hour in advance, and I got in somewhere near the middle or so. This one featured Koki Uchiyama. The whole time he didn't seem like he wanted to be there. Maybe he was tired. I don't think a whole lot of interesting things happened but they announced an English dub. Uchiyama talked really fast. I then stayed to camp for the Rascal movie. It was fine, won't rock your socks off but wasn't bad. Checked out the entertainment hall again before leaving

Day 4

Just lined up for the Horimiya panel and saw that as my only panel for the day. Uchi is here again and he seemed more energized. They actually did some live readings in this panel. Rest of the day was exploring things.

[bubble7o7]

Mature Content

Over 18’s Only

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader

Drama…

You’re sitting cosy on the sofa after a busy day at work, happily winding down getting your k drama fix.

You hear keys rattle as the door to your apartment opens and your boyfriend sighs heavily as he drops his bag and heads over to you on the sofa.

Standing behind you he whispers “Hello Lover” he leans over you searching for your lips. You tip your head back and pucker up “Hello my Love” you say as he plants a sloppy kiss, his lips covering yours.

“Mmmm I’ve missed you, come love me please” you pat the sofa next to you. He climbs over it from behind instead of walking around. Clambering on top of you and straddling your lap.

You laugh “I think there’s been a mix up, shouldn’t this be the other way round!”

“Nope, I have you where I want you” he tucks your hands under his knees, putting his hands either side of your face he kisses you softly. You try to move your hands but he won’t let you, he just kisses you harder.

“Let me touch you please?”

“Nope” he continues to kiss you.

“Aww stop it…” you whine.

He leans back, slowly stops kissing you as you lean into him to chase his lips.

“What are you watching?”

“A very frustrating KDrama” you pout

“Why’s it frustrating?”

“Well on this one there’s been 13 episodes of pure sexual tension, then when they’re eventually left alone together” you try wriggling your hands free “all he does is kiss her on the fucking forehead” He laughs at your frustration.

“Will you stop teasing and just let me touch you?” You complain

“I’m sorry” he laughs leaning in he plants a kiss on your forehead then heads into the kitchen.

“Are you kidding me!” you flop back on the sofa watching him smile at you from the kitchen. You stick your face in the sofa and let out a frustrated moan.

After a little while he comes back from the kitchen with some food for you both and sits down next to you. “Why do you watch them if they frustrate you so much?”

“I guess I’m just a sucker for a happy ending… well that and some of the kisses are worth the wait” you smile.

“What do mean?”

“Well theres Kim Soo-hyun he looks like a really good kisser… he doesn’t just press his lips to the female lead, he makes it look so passionate, it gave me butterflies”

You turn to look at Yoongi his mouth is open and his noodle laden chopsticks are hovering in front of him.

“What? What’s wrong?” You smile

“Sounds like you’ve been paying a lot of attention to Kim Soo-hyun scenes huh?!”

“Well yeah not just him though Park Hyung-sik looks like he’s a really good kisser too!” You run your fingers against your lips as Yoongi drops his chop sticks in his bowl in disgust.

“Yah!”

You’re startled then laugh nervously at his facial expression.

“This is what you’ve been doing? Perving on these guys when I’m not here!?, I thought you said the plot was good?”

You laugh “the plot is really good for this one but to be fair if there wasn’t a plot I’d still watch it with him in it!”

He turns to face you, a streak of jealousy in his eyes.

“Ok put one of these kisses on then? Let me see what all the fuss is about!”

“I’m just messing with you, you know how much I love kissing and I hate it when there isn’t a good kiss scene especially when there’s been such a big build up to it”

“No… lm not having it. Put it on, I need to see my competition”

“I can assure you there is No competition, I only have to think about kissing you and I’m turned on. Your kisses are the only ones I want”

He folds his arms in a huff…

“Ok, here watch this clip. I’m sure you’ll appreciate it too the female lead is stunning.” You hand him your phone

“Don’t care” he huffs

You play one of your many favourite scenes from Its Ok To Not Be Ok Ep 11.

You turn to watch Yoongi for his reaction. He’s watching it with the same concentration he has when reviewing one of his performances.

A whole 2:50 minutes pass by, you smile as he locks eyes with you and within a split second he pounces on you.

He kisses you hard, pushing you down into the sofa as he lays on top of you, pressing himself against you. He has one hand running up your thigh as his kisses get more intense.

You’re so turned on, you don’t know where to touch him first but you want him, all of him. You kiss him hard one hands under his t shirt and the other in his long hair, you pull him closer into you.

He can’t get enough of you, he kisses you deeper, your tongues gently brushing against each other’s. He sucks hard on your bottom lip, you whisper “Yoongi”

Then you both come up for air…

“Shit I needed that” he whispers

“See!” You shout “see what I mean?” That’s what these K Dramas do to you!” You laugh.

“I think I need to start paying more attention to the programmes you’re watching”

He leans in, you move your lips towards him craving another of his kisses, he gently caresses your cheek then kisses your forehead.

“Wait, what the?! Oh my god!… you are the worst tease!” You let out another frustrated moan.

“Never kiss me on my forehead again… unless you’re going to fuck me straight after”

“Ok”… he laughs as he takes the dishes back into the kitchen. He then turns and heads back to you, leaning in again he takes a hold of your face in his hands and softly kisses your forehead…

You let out a sigh and just as you’re about to complain, he holds his hand out to you and says “Come on then” biting his lip as he leads you to the bedroom.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL

May 2021 Wk 3

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs.

It’s a cray cray Friday when Vietnam gets its eng subs up before GMMTV Thailand. What alter-reality are we in? Well, the Vietnamese offerings are better right now anyway. (Oooo, feel that burn.) 

Ongoing Series - Thai

Top Secret Together Ep 2 - pulping it up in the best possible way. Sure sound and production values are pants, and in classic Thai fashion the editing in post is exacerbating (rather than fixing) pacing issues, but it’s still CUTE AF. I don’t even mind the added university storyline, because they’ve got good chemistry (and a confident gay fresher after a panicked gay hazer is an old favorite... what can I say, SOTUS was my first love). We aren’t spending too much time with any one couple, so it’s weighted a lot better than Brothers was, but also character development is slow. 

Siew Sum Noi Ep 2 - Unfortunately, it’s just too hard to find, plus no subs. I’m dropping it in the hopes it comes back on my radar some day. 

Y-Destiny Ep 8 - (Thurs) It’s rough having a ghost boyfriend, half your friends are scared, the other half think you’re crazy, and kissing shortens your lifespan. This was a cute couple even if I wasn’t wild about the surrounding story. 

Close Friend Ep 5: (Dear My Star/JimmyTommy) - about high school penpals. It had to rely entirely on voice over work as the actors only meet face to face at the end. It’s a good thing they are appealing screen presences on their own, with good vocal control. It’s hard to imagine any other BL pair carrying this kinda plot. It’s by far my favorite of the series so far, and I’m not even a big JimmyTommy fan. 

Fish Upon The Sky Ep 7 - no subs. Do we care? Not really. Because we have... 

Nitiman Ep 3 - currently my favorite out of Thailand. It’s the university Thai BL i’ve been waiting for since... when was the last good one? My Engineer? Yowza. Anyway we got: head on my shoulder, baby is a floppy drunk (but still wants to be in control), proximity alert, boyfriend’s closet, seme gets seriously jelly, and a cute twist on feeding him. There’s something fun and complex about Jin’s character. He’s not a panicked bi. He knows exactly what’s going on, he just hasn’t decided if he wants Bb or not. He clearly enjoys being looked after, the compliments, and the attention, but he’s not sure if he’s going to like what happens if he gives in. I like that twist on the usual tsundere uke archetype a lot, cautious rather than willfully obtuse or freaked out. We can see Jin realizing in stages: I like this person, I like that they like me, I like the romantic attentiveness. But in the background is... do I actually want to f*k him? It’s a dynamic we don’t often see on BL. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

HIStory 4: Close To You (Taiwan) Ep 10 fin - the most ridiculous show using BLs worst tropes in a sort of weird smoothie of bitter greens and too ripe banana. The ending was the sappiest cheesiest thing ever, like cheese syrup tapped from the cheese tree. So of course I loved it, but I’m pretty sure I giggled through all the bits meant to be profound. Because, in the end, to tolerate this show at all, you just can’t take ANY of it seriously. RECOMMENDED (with some SERIOUS reservations and trigger warnings.) Full review here. 

Be Loved in House: I Do (Taiwan) Ep 1-2 - I don’t mind a damaged seme character but this one is a bit weird for me. Like creepy Cheese in the Trap level weird. On the bright side, the story has given our tsundere uke good motivation for his angst and great existing friendships, loyalty, and likability. Plus I’m invested in the cafe owner/innocent puppy side dishes. So if it’s only the seme character I’m not jiving with, and he’s the most established actor, it should all turn out fine. I believe in you, Taiwanese BL. 

Papa & Daddy (Taiwan) Ep 6 fin - speaking of belief. This such a good show but they gave us a cliffhanger ending. Now we must hope against hope for season two. That’s never guaranteed with Taiwan tho. So, I’m docking a few points and saying, RECOMMENDED so long as you realize it’s a cliffhanger. 

Love is Science? (Taiwan) Ep 1-9 (BL subplot) - this is a good het romance, but the fact that the BL subplot is a beautifully acted disaster bi + confident gay means you’re hearing about it whether you want to or not. Plus they just added in some GL! Come on! I gotta support Taiwan normalizing queer to this extent. They are fighting the good fight and if I also have to watch a career lady and her much younger softest straight boi get it on, too? Twist my arm with that service sub subtext. Go on Taiwan, TWIST IT. It’s on Viki. Join the revolution.   * Incidentally if you actually like the D/s het dynamic of this show, I highly recommend Japanese Kimi wa Petto - career woman keeps a hot young dancer boy as a pet. Oh yes, an actual pet, that IS the pitch. Never doubt Japan when kink is on the line. It’s also on Viki. Go get your kink on, thank me later. (If it helps: That was not a request.)  

Most Peaceful Place 2 (Vietnam) Ep 2 (AKA 5) - love triangles aren’t my thing, but if you’re gonna do it short form, by all means bring in the lead’s other BL pairing so the chemistry is on point. Now I've no idea who I want him to end up with. Can’t they just be in a poly triad? 

My Lascivious Boss (Vietnam) Ep 7 - I’m still enjoying it a lot. It’s still unabashedly queer and the tension is ramping up. We now have secret identity, blackmail, femme fatale, faen fatale, and incoming seme confrontation. Best of all, the series is still airing, which makes it longer than any other Vietnamese BL I’ve seen (aside from Tein Bromance - which is just too weird to count). 

Gossip - Thai BL 

SEVEN PROJECT TEASERS

No one is entirely sure what Studio Wabi Sabi’s Seven Project/7Project will entail. 

It might be like Close Friend (1 episode per couple, no linking), 

or Y-Destiny (2 episodes per couple, loosely linked), 

or The En of Love (4 episodes per couple, linked but independent consecutive stories). 

They’re giving the couple’s arcs separate titles. So each one would be what? Seven Project: Once Upon a Time or the like? We’re in Taiwanese title territory people and NO ONE WANTS TO GO THERE. Anygay... 

Once Upon a Time is the BounPrem (og UWMA) anchor story, and seems to be the most dramatic and likely saddest. These two can handle most of what’s thrown at them at this juncture, so it should be good. 

Vs Love is a BoomPeak (og Make it Right) university vehicle. Since I thought Boom was done with our nonsense, I couldn’t be more thrilled and surprised this pair is doing another show together. I don’t think either of them are the greatest actors but I find Peak very endearing and Boom charismatic on screen, so I’ll watch. 

Would You be My Love is the hotly anticipated SantaEarth launch. They’re a (cultivated) IRL ship and Earth is an established BL actor. They have great chemistry and high energy so this could be lots of fun. 

We are also getting a GL from this series from established BL actresses Samantha and Pineare. Nothing teased yet on that, but I’m looking forward to this installment the most. Also curious to see how the ladies handle the branding and promo side, not to mention the culture. (Thailand variety shows gonna force *girls* to play the Pepero game?) 

Secret Crush on You upcoming Thai BL with no release date, co-produced by and featuring (but NOT staring) Saint and directed by Cheewin (sigh) with all fresh faces. (Previously known as Stalker the series.) It looks like pure pulp and I’m not wild about the plot but could be better than expected as it’s adapted from a novel. Cheewin is an okay director when he has an actual story to follow. 

Don’t Say No the series. Coming from the producers of TharnType this is the JaFirst vehicle many have been waiting for. Friends to lovers + a good boy/bad boy pairing on a sports romance foundation. It’s basketball so they tapped Meen as well (he’s semi-pro). The bad news? You get one guess as to who is writing the darn thing? Yep it’s MAME. So, ya know, expect some slam dunk kidnapping, a light dribbling of rape, and me turning into a basketcase. AKA... 

Will I have to live blog this series in order to survive it? That seems to be the only way I can. So probably. Which means the bad sports puns will continue. Look, if I’m suffering, SO ARE YOU! 

Rumors of a new YinWar vehicle The Best Story (mini series) coming in July. Also rumors that their previously announced Love Mechanics (full length series) has either been delayed, is facing money issues, or is moving studios, or all three. 

Breaking News 

DELAYED (I’m talking these three off the watch list until we get new airing dates) 

Love Area’s release was pushed out but it got a trailer. 

Golden Blood was supposed to drop Weds but comments in MDL report that it is delayed due to C19.  

Love’s Outlet (Taiwan) is supposed to have started a 50 episode run (only 3-5 min each, what utter nonsense). Sadly, this delay is due to a surge in cases in Taiwan which was doing so well, but also doesn’t have many inoculations. 

Bad Buddy has started workshopping at GMMTV actual. 

Kang Insoo’s BTS for Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding is SO FLIPPING CUTE. You have to watch it. Trust me, I don’t rec behind the scenes stuff often. 

Next Week Looks Like This: 

Some shows may be listed later than actual air date for International accessibility reasons.

Upcoming 2021 BL master post here.

Links to watch are provided when possible, ask in a comment if I missed something.

[vaguely-concerned]

R-r-r-rewatch thoughts for The Mandalorian S2 Ep2

(or Chapter 10 as they seem resolved to call it)

- can I just express my joy for a moment that in one episode we get peli, the answer to my pleas for female representation in the ‘sketchy middle aged car mechanic’ niche, and a female alien designed with no consideration towards sexiness. (I mean I’m sure there’s someone. There is always someone somewhere on the Internet, is the bitter truth history has shown to us. but it’s not the intention behind the design haha)  

- they do take great pains to deliberately show you boba’s armour several times both in the recap and in the episode itself, so never despair he is very likely still on his way onto our screens once more

- this dude holding the baby hostage wanting specifically the jetpack in exchange is the one (1) break this whole episode gave din lol 

also the Patented Mando Finger Curl of Stress while he talked softly and calmly to not promp this asshole to make a sudden move... the most endearing character tic, I love my space cowboy dad so much 

- fun continuity detail: din is all out of whistling birds now, and you can see it here!

I wonder if he could still use the same mechanism with different ‘ammo’, it’s just not as effective? from the way the armorer spoke whistling birds seem quite rare and it would be an inefficient use of beskar if that’s the only thing it can be loaded with

 - I love how after the last episode, a 50 min epic with a bunch of original trilogy significance and impressive technical achievements and exciting character reveals, I was like ‘yeah okay I suppose that is quite interesting’, and this mess/comedy of inconveniences is the thing that fully makes my brain tip into the obsessive ‘BABY AND DAD SHOW!! BABY AND DAD SHOW!!!!!’ mind state lol

- ah the traditional ‘mando trudging slowly but steadily through the desert’ montage we all love to see (I hope this is going to be a Thing for the second episode of every season from now on) 

Also I assume his suit has some sort of temperature regulation built in and that’s how he didn’t, y’know. die under the blazing desert sun

-

CAT FIGHT CAT FIGHT man I love the jawa. also mando doesn’t even glance over at them, really emphasizing how he’s like. done with this entire day (and it’s all barely even getting started din! i’m sorry)

 yodito’s look in this scene tho... he’s like ‘we’ve Seen some shit lady’ (actually I think he’s staring at ‘dr mandible’ like O___o. it’s been a long day for a lil boy) 

you get to see dr mandible’s cards a few times, so I assume anyone who knows the rules of... sabacc? probably? could figure out beforehand that he was in a bad spot. (the star wars fanbase is one of those where I KNOW the rules exist somewhere, and I know people who know those rules exist too)  

- that sound the baby keeps making -- the ‘boo-a’, sometimes with a p-sound at the end -- if that’s the precursor to him saying any variation whatsoever of ‘dad’ or ‘papa’ or ‘baba’ or even ‘buir’ or anything, I will die. I will sink to the ground in a heap and never get up (the way he keeps seeking out gaze contact with the helmet and seems perfectly satisfied with it too... fasdhfaskdjhl my FEELINGS)

- it seems confirmed in this ep that the mandos who died on nevarro did so while holding off the enemy so the rest(probably especially the children) could get away; some of them appear to have escaped. which I guess is a small relief

- 

frog lady stepping out of the shadows and into our hearts

I like that her firm nod after Peli translates ‘her husband has seen them’ lets us know she understands... basic? is that the common tongue thing in star wars there’s just so many to remember across fandoms lol? perfectly well, even if she can’t speak it. 

- mando might be running low on ammo for the pulse rifle, if the fact that he hasn’t replaced the missing cartridge on his... bandolier belt thingy is any indication

ETA: actually ignore me this has been a thing since the literal first episode of the show my brain just had a hiccup lol

- so baby seems to use a little bit of the force to pull the eggs towards him -- I wonder how often he ‘taps into it’ or if it’s always ‘on’ in the background for him. if so I guess there’s no wonder he’s so hungry (but also... kid you can’t end this lady’s entire family line like that one cat who singlehandedly made extinct a whole species of bird! D:)

- din so rarely gets openly angry, he just gets passive aggressive and grumpy. and that’s probably not the healthiest way to deal with things but I love him

- frog lady reacts so strongly to when din sends the ping when nothing else woke her up, I wonder if she can hear more frequencies than a human

- 

hello darkness my old frieeennnddd

- 

proof nr 1508 that din does not starve this baby you guys, he even has his own little tray just the right size for him! as it happens the baby simply seems to prefer eating things that are... still alive in some capacity. which, uh. maybe they can invest in some form of non-sentient crickets or something for him to hunt down and.... oh dear

- 

Look how they massacred my boy

By the way I finally managed to put into words why the Razor Crest -- and particularly the way it keeps getting beaten to hell and back and patched up again --  is so symbolically important and meaningful to me in this show in this post over here! it’s always a great relief to me when I can finally understand what the hell I’ve been going on about all this time and this was one of those lol

-  honestly if it weren’t for frog lady and (more importantly) the baby I think there’s a slight chance din would’ve gone ‘well I had a good-ish run of it for a while there’ and just let the ice claim him haha   

- “Why don’t you come over here and give me a hand. Make yourself useful” This is the one time in the episode I think he crosses the line into just being a dick for a moment (but noticeably the baby isn’t just a little hurt at this reaction, he’s clearly surprised and confused, which means this really does not happen often. after the time mando’s been having recently I guess a moment’s snappishness is understandable haha. he does follow up right after with being much more responsive and attentive when the baby toddles away from him, so it feels like it’s going to be okay)

also the ‘boo-ap’ sound is there again when he’s trying to get din’s attention. just sayin’ 

when din comes over to see the footprints baby makes a declarative little meep like ‘see??? I did tell you!’ haha

- it is very funny that mando is using all his technology meant to track down dangerous bounties in the grungy depths of the criminal underworld... to find a naked lady just chillin’ in a hot spring 

- 

cue the ‘father is evil?’ memes fsadfda. actually the funniest thing about this moment (apart from the fabulous finger acting) is that din actually snatches a few eggs out of the baby’s reach more subtly right before, and that baby only whines for ALL OF ONE SECOND before he goes to sniff around for other food possibilities fkadfhjkds. from my experience with human children he’s a lot less prone to tantrums. yodito doesn’t get mad, he gets even 

- baby running towards din through the hatching spiderlings like ‘DAD I FUCKED UUUUUUP’, din’s little strangled ‘ngh’ sound as he picks the baby up and watches all the creepy crawlies come out... *chef kiss* impeccable 

(that little ‘ngh’ and the soft shocked ‘ah ah AH!’s from when he goes flying at the beginning of the episode... pedro pascal and his voice work for this character gives me so much life. in some ways din has this sort of dignity and grace and in other ways he uh extremely doesn’t. he gets to be cool but also vulnerable in ways a lot of male main characters don’t and it’s probably why I love him so much) 

btw here is that moment when din moves to hold the baby tightly against him with both hands as the big spider appears, because it gets me right in the heart... it such an instinctive thing of holding on to the dearest thing you’ve got before something bad is about to happen

fdsafhsdakjlfhsdkjlhfsdajhf oh my god the baby is clutching din’s finger with his little hand during the chase!!!! 😭😭😭

this FUCKING SHOW has just WEAPONIZED putting in small details everywhere to convey the love and tenderness and attachment felt by a little muppet doll even where only weirdos like me will frame by frame their way through the video to see it I am so MAD

- frog lady going ‘fuck this’ and bounding along is  e v e r y t h i n g 

- din is an amazing shot, though, he doesn’t seem to miss a single one in this whole scene (then again there’s something to shoot at basically everywhere one can take aim so lol)

-

baby hiding behind/half hugging din’s boot as he tries to get the doors closed hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I can’t breathhhhheeeee 

honestly every single one of the baby’s proximity seeking behaviours in this ep has me on my knees 

- it’s very unfair to play the heroic happy mando music like everything is going to be fine and then have a huge fuck-off spider drop down from the ceiling and break it off mid-tune, the mandalorian, you have trained me in certain ways and now do you betray me??? how can I trust again

- the camera work in the scene with the new republic guys gives such a good sense of the discomfort of being judged from on high by someone or something you can’t really see -- the glare of the lights blocking out everything in the shots from din’s pov makes it feel like a tense interrogation (the new republic dude who is actually dave filoni has such a look of fondness as he watches din tho it’s kind of sweet)

- ...oh no I think baby was actually considering munching on that dismembered spider leg YODITO NO JUST EAT YOUR KRAYT DRAGON BABY

- hngh this is a weird filler episode and it has my entire heart. I suspect we might get some episodes of a more stationary baby between active ones like this -- you can tell a little bit in this episode that especially having him running around fast is quite difficult to have look natural, they likely save that effort up for when it best serves the narrative  

[potterology]

fave dylb scenes bc I can't get over and I’m already rewatching and noticing little things heheee 

- first meeting outside the restaurant. ohh how I love how awkward yet endearing they both were when they finally introduced themselves to one another. rewatching it made me realize that JY was already smitten by SA since the start. (like literally since the start y'all!!! he didn't even know her yet and wanted to stop the car to get SA an umbrella and this was in the first ep!!)

- when JY switched coffee cups with SA bc she spilt her cup and he started drinking it so she can’t refuse even though he doesn’t like coffee. Like he just did it bc he was compelled to do so?? like dude what if she already drank from it??? This scene was so funny to me and I love it cuz I dont think SA is used to being the one taken care of like that so it was just v cute

- when the noona was trying to get them to talk banmal but SA was like oh noooo he’s a superstar. This was cute bc you can actually see that JY was disappointed. Also they keep sneaking peeks at each other lol cute fools 

- waiting for taxi scene- this was so freaking adorable. shows how considerate they both are for each other and it’s so freaking awkward when they both realized they were standing there waiting for each other to get a taxi- but like in the cutest way

- when they were both outside that restaurant and SA asked if JY enjoyed his performance at granny’s house and I think this was the first time someone asked our boy if he likes what he does for a living and you can just tell his heart went soft for her(same dude same)

- spontaneous non-date date. ohh I love the first time they ate together at that beer place. they really started to get to know each other there. the mood and how that scene was filmed was just chef’s kiss~~

- rehearsal room we should be friends scene. when homeboy transitioned from moonlight sonata to happy birthday, y'all knew it was over for SA- god damn I would have swoon over too

- by the river “I wanted to see you” scene- high key JY sucks at communicating but I love how he is just so taken by SA that he just flat out says he misses her and as soon as he says it he was almost shocked himself. so pure

- the midnight call. I MEAN. guys. guys. he wanted to just talk to her and ask her out but tried to be nonchalant about it. ahhh they literally portrayed the first stages of dating so well I'm goo for it !!!!!!

- first walk together in the walkway. this was just so adorable. the almost hand holding. the chemistry!! the shy smiles :’’’) 

- SA’s birthday when she thanked JY for just being there for her. I love how she quietly acknowledges him and it was such an intimate interaction between them. I replay that scene a lot in my head

- when he ran to SA to give her his signed CD. He was so worried about her he forgot about JK lmaooo. Also the fact the he validated her as a violinist when SA was at a very low point... I mean... boyfriend material ugh

- the scene when SA told JY every little thing he does concerns her and that she didn’t want to feel that way about him anymore. As soon as SA said that homeboy PANICKED!!! I don’t even think he knew how much he liked SA until she said that :’)

- the lunchroom scenes 1) when they were teasing each other and 2) when JY announced that they were dating lolol I love how stoic he normally is but for SA he becomes a softie hehe

-ice cream day date; lol when SA won’t let JY tie her shoelaces bc she didn’t want to fall for him lol ok girl

-night ice cream/ stairs date. y'all know already. shit was just adorable. SA going for the kiss. I melted with the ice cream

- when JY asked SA for her handkerchief!!! it’s such a small gesture but they both knew it had a special meaning and I love how it put SA over the moon. (Also let’s include all the other times we see JY actually use that handkerchief- especially after they broke up. like homeboy was holding on to it for his dear life bc it was the only thing he had of SA~~ my fragile heart!!) ps did we ever see SA get a handkerchief from him???? No??? Sbs give me that pls

- when MS was telling JY in the car that SA has only openly confessed liking two things in her life and one them was JY. He was so flustered and couldn’t hide his smile and dimples... bruhhhhh he was full on swoon. Also when JY heard SA say that she really likes JY like he was so proud of himself lmao he’s like “yeah my gf LIKES ME” lolol

- when the lovebirds fought who was gonna clean up the broken glass at JY apartment. I love loveee this one bc SA has been beaten down so much by everyone calling her talentless that she didn’t even consider how important her hands is to her as a musician. And JY being like honey ur a violist and a musician too- UR HANDS ARE PRECIOUS. This was just v touching. Again showing how JY has always considered SA as an equal despite all the shit people say about his gf. luv him :’)

-all the moments JY just stood by SA’s side and held her hand when she needed comfort. I love how he’s just there for her. His silent support was just enough. (One thing that would have been nice is if we saw SA do the same thing, I felt like the writers were almost there but just didn't go all the way which is a shame tbh)

- Their lil day trip to JY’s hometown. I like how JY was so open to SA here. When he proclaimed that he never felt “this way before”  I screamed!! It was at that moment you clearly knew as a viewer that JY never really loved JK. He might have he loved the idea of her, yes. But he never truly loved her the way he loves SA. And his realization of this in that particular episode just made me so so so happy

- Handholding in the bus scene. That shit was so freaking tender bc you can tell how content JY was. He was beyond smitten- homeboy was IN LOVE AT THIS POINT

- when JY dropped SA home. I mean everything about this scene really makes ur heart soft right?? How both of them were beaming? How SA feet probably hurt bc homegirl was wearing heels the whole day and walked another 30 min just so she can spend more time with JY? How she literally ran back to him and JY just had this impression watching her like “my gf is cute af”?? How SA said something along the lines of JY having somewhere to belong to now and you can tell this had a double meaning for him bc at this point he prob considered SA as his home..I was literally mush oh my god. 

-break up scene. I know, v painful- but this was a rare one in kdramaland where I actually thought it was necessary for them to split (still wish it was done earlier but alas I'll take it) It was a graceful and needed breakup. Also when JY pulled out that umbrella for her.... bish it was over for me

- SA’s recital. I MEAN HOW IN SYNC COULD THEY BE. I normally skip the musical performances whenever I watch dramas that are music related- but this show makes it so magical I simply could not. PEAAAKKK ROMANCE

- JY’s recital- when he played that last song I was a big mess cuz we all knew it was dedicated for SA :’’) (I listen to this piece all the time now and im so emo when I hear it bc like god WHEN)

- First I love you scene. JY just going for it and chasing his happiness without caring if SA might reject him. We love to see it

-Second I love you scene. YALL. YALLLLL the way JY just releases his breathe when SA said she can't be friends bc she loves him more than a friend will forever slay me. Kim min jae’s acting here was real good. I love how JY said I love you four times and just went for it. top kissing scene in a krdrama for me hehee 

- dubokki date. lmao at JY with the spicy level. just plain cute

-the quick side by side peek to JY new album in the last episode. the way it showed how their relationship evolved. how he signed it as “for my love song ah” BISH I WANNA DATE A MUSICIAN TOO NOW

- that lil scene where JY wrote SA’s name as the planner bc he knows she works just as hard as the musicians and deserves the recognition. get u a boy who will vandalize a program notice for u :)

- basically all the scenes at the end of ep 16. I wish all of them were longer. I wanted to see more of them dating and happy!!! But I just love how they are both so INTO each other and you can see how happy JY is bc he finally has that person back that understood him since the beginning and it makes you feel so warm knowing they’re each other’s support system ahhhh I love their love !!

- also just all the scenes that JY looks at SA lovingly ~~ which literally happened since ep 1 I mean they are literally heart eyes emoji for each other every time :’)) 

- oh oh OH special shout out to ep 11 when JY just can’t stop holding SA’s hands !! the way he does it is so freaking INTIMATE like if I can only describe how I feel whenever I see compilation gifs of that episode where JY just reaches out and holds SA’s hands so steadily and tightly...it’s literally the most heartwarming thing.. idek how to explain what I’m trying to convey but I just vibe with it so much?? it’s so intimate and romantic.. Kim min jae I will die 4 u my love

[lesbianlenas]

here are my comprehensive thoughts on bly manor that i have been writing since midway through my watch of the show in case anyone wants 2 hear my thoughts

victoria pedretti’s voice alone makes me want to nut unironically. combo w everything else and she is literally god. knew this from hill house but now she’s blond + playing a lezzie so that amps it all up by 500.

speaking of have so much love in my heart for miss dani clayton. she just wants to help children and is so caring and kind like ok wife? her adorable fake british accent. cannot make tea or coffee. i’m going to call the FUCKING police. determined walk run. tucked in shirt. comp het + internalized homophobia. just so brave and selfless. she has it all. would marry her in half a second.

and the absolute DEDICATION of her stomping on out after flora when viola just almost choked her to death. i’m literally on my knees proposing right now.

flora is so fucking cute absolutely love her would die for her immediately. also sometimes she is creepy and i am very scared of her. duality.

did not enjoy the jump scare w edwin or edward or whatever the fuck mr hetero’s name was i don’t remember. not the car scene like when dani turns around and sees him behind her and then he goes flying back into the mansion. anyway i get he had his heart broken but do not feel good abt how he was basically trying to force dani into marriage by constantly asking her until she said yes. like of course she’s going to eventually give in even if she didn’t want to when he was clearly not going to stop and if she said no instead of pushing it off she would lose basically everyone she considered to be her family. and then when she tells him that she can’t love him romantically he’s like fuck you dani ok homophobe. perhaps i’m glad he got hit by a truck ❤️

immediately noticed smth was up w hannah from the second she wouldn’t eat and i was like oh ok so she’s a ghost. her ep was SO confusing though until the end i was like what the fuck is going on here 😩 anyway hate to be right but. fuck peter quint.

same thing w miles i was like what the FUCK is wrong w this kid and then i was like oh he’s possessed then oh he’s possessed by peter quint in like. ep 2. once again hate to be right. fuck peter quint. also prior to watching the show i rarely saw anything abt miles and i was like why does everyone only talk abt flora? now i get it.

jamie is just so fucking sexy. like the lesbian energy off of her is unreal and smth that you don’t get too often w lesbians on tv. either amelia eve is a dyke or she somehow knows exactly how to emulate them bc truly unreal. only wish is that she didn’t wear makeup but we can’t have it all can we. also cannot stop thinking of her as a mechanic every time she’s wearing that like jump suit and god that would be so fucking sexy i......anyway love her w my whole heart.

speaking of how much i love jamie....the way that she acts all tough and a little cold while she is actually the most empathetic person and somehow knows exactly what to say to anyone when they’re having a rough moment and she won’t sugar coat it either but it’s bc she cares and understands so deeply that it’s ok.....wow. wife?

wish we could’ve gotten to know rebecca more outside of just her relationship w peter. i feel like that did her a major injustice. we practically saw none of her relationship w the kids and it seemed to me like they were trying to imply in the beginning that flora had been very close w rebeccca and i feel like we didn’t see that. felt like rebecca ended up mostly being a prop for peter’s story which was unfortunate considering she was such a great character. and did NOT get why she was so hung up on him either like oh he SEES me after one convo? he was also a dick like immediately after like....once again feels like a disservice that they had her be in love w peter based off of like nothing. like all of a sudden all her ambition is gone and she just wants to b w peter? lol ok.

charlotte cheating on her husband w his brother the absolute mind. fucking hilarious. thought he was jealous at the birth scene or that flora might be his but i was like no no way he probably just has a thing for her. but she is way too attractive for her husband anyway. do not condone cheating but she’s a milf so i let it slide. also flora actually being henry’s hilarious. fucking love this drama. had me rolling. “do you love him?” [silence] LMFAO. and dom’s (got his name!) fucking smack down on henry holy shitttttt will b taking some notes for next time i’d like to turn someone suicidal on fucking god.

i know it was the best vehicle for telling the story but tbh the dream hopping got SO exhausting for me after a while. i just did not enjoy that format. i’m already not one for flashbacks even in this context bc i want to know what’s going to happen next in the main story rather than what happened to get here since i know where it’s going and i just found this to be even more confusing and a little frustrating and incredibly hard to follow. but that’s just my personal taste i wouldn’t objectively say it made the show bad or anything. i think it was also bc all of the twists were unfortunately very obvious so the long drawn out explanations were like. thank u u could’ve said this in five mins instead bc i already knew this. felt like some of the dream scenes were pointless and could’ve been replaced w some better scenes.

flashback ep w viola was ok. kate siegel is so hot obviously but. once again felt extremely extended past the point it had to be. the repition of sleep wake walk was SO annoying like thank u i got it. but i was always a lot more interested in what was happening current day than in the past so once again this was just whatever for me. but good on viola’s hot sister for taking her out have to do what u have to do u know! did enjoy viola killing her back. just thought it was funny.

and how can i even express in words how i felt abt dani and jamie’s relationship? watching the scene where they first kiss literally put me to tears and i just had a real moment w it. and just in general the way that they open up to each other is just so incredible and how jamie makes dani feel so seen that dani literally can’t resist kissing her makes me just. cant put it into words. their relationship really encapsulates what is so beautiful abt lesbianism and that means so much to me truly. will probably make a whole post abt it tomorrow.

ok so in conclusion: i wanted more present day stuff instead of flashbacks. i feel like there was a LOT more creepy shit they could have done in the house and they just. didnt. also wanted to see more of owen in general but also hannah and owen’s relationship and jamie and dani’s relationship. felt like peter and rebecca got practically more screen time than jamie and dani did despite them being the main couple. felt like character & relationships wise there was a lot left unsaid. like yes the plot was finished with a neat bow but i don’t think most of the characters were done justice in the end. and speaking of which i don’t think the sad ending was necessary. do not see a single reason as to why dani needed to die. i feel like they felt it needed a sad ending and that’s why they killed her rather than it actually making sense. like girl get an exorcist. overall the whole thing felt more like an outline for a show that needed to be fleshed out rather than an actual finished show. perhaps could have benefitted from a few more eps maybe. but also. FUCK peter quint.

[jq37]

The Report Card – Fantasy High Sophomore Year Ep 12

Fig And Ayda Sitting in a Spiky Infernal Nightmare Tree

Welcome back to Fantasy High, where Brennan and Emily are giving the gays everything they want but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. For now, the Bad Kids have just arrived in Arborly which is this ancient, twisty, mysterious forest town with buildings kind of built into the trees in such a way that makes it hard to tell it’s a town at first glance. Anyway, they get to Hollyhill--the family home of Fig’s gnome business-friend--Grover Tillythatch--which is basically this very dope hollowed out tree. At the edge of the forest (maybe a 30 min walk away), there is a place where the trees grow and twist together into an 80 foot high wall, barbed with razor sharp briars and super ominous looking. Très Sleeping Beauty.  

They unlock the gate but then realize they have to do something with the Hangvan. Gorgug thinks there’s a way to, with his Artificer skills, give the Van the availability to shrink, but that’ll be a whole project for later. What we have to deal with now though is the fact that Gilear is caught up in the wheel well of the Van, apple stuck in his mouth like a roast pig. Through a series of insane and very Gilear events (not a teleportation mishap like I initially thought), he ended up stuck there and has been since they woke up. He fully missed Hilariel and this is the first anyone noticed he was missing.The kids help Gilear out and give him a little makeover, courtesy of Adaine’s jacket--very needed because he 100% pissed his pants while jammed up (and way too soon after getting stuck).

Kristen knows that the temple she read about is extremely close to where they are. Adaine does a quick Locate Creature and can tell the elf from her Scry isn’t within the 1000 foot range. Plus, the forest they’re in just looks different.  

Anyway, once they’re in Ragh starts grabbing food. Sandra-Lynn gives Gilear a massage because that dude needs some TLC. Tracker is sticking with Kristen and in a weird headspace over the Galakaya info. And, turns out Ayda didn’t just stay in Leviathan. She teleported with them to see them off so she’s around too. The gang does a little investigation of the house where Riz finds out Grover is abusing his company expense account and Adaine pings a crazy amount of infernal energy from the spooky briar wall. Adaine also senses a strong but old (300 year-ish) aura of druidic magic in Arborly--from the reclamation efforts that took Arborly back from being behind the wall that separates Sylvere from the outside. It’s really the only progress that’s been made and it seems like it took a lot out of whoever did it. One more thing: There is a real gnomish energy around town (similar to the vibe at Gorgug’s place), even though Arborly is supposed to be very wood elf heavy.

Throughout all I’ve been describing, there have been rumblings of maybe throwing a party and Fig invites Ayda who enthusiastically accepts. The adults go to bed in the Van for safety (Sandra-Lynn puts the Hangman in charge while they’re gone) and the teens do what teens do when they have no adult supervision: They wild out. But not in a Golden Gardens “Let’s get tattoos and do drugs” kinda way. In a real, teenager kind of way. In an “I’m making crab nachos because my parents never let me,” kind of way. But that “they” doesn’t include Fig because she is doing the other thing teens do when they have no adult supervision: Sneaking out. Specifically to look at the briar wall. She can hear these faint whispers coming from the wall and Emily manages to get jump scared in a D&D game by Ayda who is suddenly standing next to Fig, having followed her because the party got overwhelming. 

They have a talk which I can and will describe but that needs to be seen in full to really appreciate the intimacy and tenderness but also fumbling awkwardness that’s happening. So while the rest of the Bad Kids are drinking and doing crab-stands and pretending to be shrimp (go with it) Fig tells Ayda that she sometimes does stuff like pretend to be other people and indulge in loud nonsense to cover up negative thoughts, like the ones that come from your dad being shoved in a gem and then getting kidnapped. Ayda can’t understand the disguising as a coping mechanism: “If I were you I wouldn’t want to be anyone else because you are very exceptional.” She then offers to give Fig a better look at the wall and, when Fig accepts, she turns them both invisible and flies them to it. 

Fig, upon watching Ayda do that very dope thing says that there’s no reason for Ayda to think she’s special when she can do cool stuff like that. Ayda, as we already know, thinks Fig is super dope too, both in abilities and personality. Ayda analyzes the briar wall and finds out mostly stuff we already knew--it keeps people from getting in or out, including through magical means like Dimension Door and it’s keyed to powerful devils. When she reaches for the thorns, they grow out to stab her and she flinches back before they can. When Fig does the same, the thorns don’t grow out. And, when she does a less intense Burning Hands, a charred handprint is left behind and the heat and energy travels somewhere else. The aura the wall is giving out doesn’t seem to bother her as much as it probably would someone else. Ayda finds it very cool, as she’s found everything Fig has done. They dip back into heart to heart mode and Ayda reveals something that we already knew from Brennan on the Discord: Ayda is technically about 150 years old due to her Phoenix cycling and she’s been working on building the Compass Points Library across her lifetimes, aided by notes left to herself by her previous incarnations. Fig asks why she would do that instead of just reinventing herself and Ayda says she doesn’t have a lot of self confidence and doesn’t want to make mistakes. Fig throws up in anticipation of saying something sincere, says she thinks Ayda is perfect the way she is, and then--as she is wont to do--skateboards away (successfully and 80 feet down the briar wall with a 22 acrobatics check).

Ayda flies down, compliments her on the sick trick then asks her to sign a binding contract that says she has info that she will give Fig but Fig can’t make any assumptions based on it or judge her. (The cast at this point is losing their minds and has been for the past couple of minutes.) Fig signs it and then Ayda gives her the information which is as follows: “At any waking moment outside of combat that you and I have been together, if you had tried to kiss me on the mouth, it would have been received favorably.” Fig drafts a contract (as a lawyer I’m using that term extremely loosely) that says that if Ayda makes fun of her, Fig will give her a wet willy. Ayda says that it’s more of a threat than a contract and Fig abruptly kisses her and then skateboards away and hides. Ayda doesn’t really have a good frame of reference for how this is supposed to go and Fig is throwing out all sorts of mixed signals but Fig comes out from hiding and apologizes and says that she’s having trouble being vulnerable since she hasn’t really done this as herself before. Ayda asks if they can go again because she thinks she can do better. Ally and Lou howl and cheer and bless the Union. Murph is clapping. Siobhan and Zac are full gone. Fig says that she only wanted to have a party so Ayda would stay longer. Ayda says she only stayed to hang out with Fig. Ayda says this is the best moment of her current life. Fig says she’s going for best, period--past incarnations included. They make out some more until Ayda has to go. Ayda says she needs to go so she can research the Planeshift spell for Fig (for free!). She doesn’t even care about shrinking down the library. Before she leaves, Ayda pulls out one of her feathers and says that if Fig holds it up and says her name, she’ll hear it and be able to come and help. Fig does the same with one of her ear-cuffs but it’s more of a gesture than an actual magical effect (though the cuff is bloody and mark my words, this is exactly the kind of goof that becomes plot relevant later). Fig comes back to the insanity the house has dissolved to and goes to use the hot tub.     

No comment. 

They all eventually go outside to sleep on a mattress, by the Van to get the protection of the Hallow spell. It’s a little glossed over but we learn when Fabian gives Riz Bardic Inspiration to remember to sleep outside that he’s taken a level of bard! In the morning (by which I mean afternoon), they all wake up to see Sandra-Lynn and Gilear speaking to, like, 40 wood-elf rangers. They’re mainly talking to an intense lady who seems to have a pretty high rank and this older looking fox. Fig steps up to speak for the group since they’re there on her invite and the elven woman is instantly wary of her horns, plus the Hangman is right there. She clearly doesn’t trust the infernal. With Guidance from Kristen, she gets a 27 Persuasion which tells her this lady (whose name we learn is Mira) will never like her BUT that’s OK because she’s not in charge. The fox actually outranks her. 

Fig shakes hands with the fox whose name is Nuathra and who is very charmed. The Bad Kids follow suit with the politeness and Nuathra is won over. He fends off Mira’s suspicions and is so chill that Fig decides (after consulting with Adaine) to just tell him they’re going into the nightmare forest. That gets bows pulled on them and Adaine steps in and identifies herself as the elven Oracle and says that they have to do it for prophecy reasons. The elves start whispering and Nuathra, who believes she is who she says she is, asks if she knows about any other high elves who look like her slinking around. Adaine says that yeah, she does, but she’s not working with them. Kristen tries to cut in and it makes Mira super aggro--seems like she doesn’t like beings that are devil adjacent or humans either. She also makes a dismissive comment aimed at high elves in response to Adaine’s statement about morality being complex.

Nuathra tells her to cool her jets and says that things are kinda tense because for the past few months, a high elven woman (Adaine’s mom) showed up, took a room at the Owl and Harp (a gnomish tavern), and hired a local wood elf drunkard named Killian. She kept to herself mostly but did do some business at the local gnomish Tinkerer’s Hall (possibly for spell components). Two nights ago, another high (extremely gassy) elven woman showed up and then they vanished (figuratively) with Killian.

When Tinkerer’s Hall is mentioned, Gorgug cuts in to get more info on that. Nuathra says that there is a gnomish population in Arborly because the Druid who gave their life to reclaim Arborly (Crafty Rootdrinker) was a gnome so now gnomes kind of have protected status. Nuathra starts tearing up a little and we later find out (via Gorgug’s intuition) that Nuathra was their Awakened animal companion (Awakened means you give a plant or animal average human intelligence and the ability to speak a language). Nuathra asks why they want to go into the forest and Gorgug says it’s because the Nightmare King might be coming back. After being horrified to learn that the NK’s crown wasn’t in magical Fort Knox and instead was just in some dude’s desk, Nuathra says that all the town’s resources are at their disposal. He points out the three obvious places to check out: (1) the tavern, (2) the tinkerer’s hall, and (3) a shrine which is a possible entrance to the forest of the NK (the Shrine of Thorns which is just on the edge of the forest--mostly still in the forest--and dedicated to a mysterious goddess).

Adaine asks about the dude in her vision and realizes quickly it’s not Killian. Then, following a comment Fig makes about honesty being the right move and spurred by their out of character knowledge, start poking at Fig for an answer to what’s different about her today. Riz rolls a 28 Investigate and Fig burns 2 luck points and a guidance to beat it with like a 31. Wild. Then they split up like this:

Gorgug, Ragh, and Fabian (with the Hangman) go to the tinkerer’s hall.

Adaine and Riz go to the tavern.

Kristen, Tracker and Fig go to the shrine (ferried by Sandra-Lynn who wants to then scout around on Baxter).       

Gilear makes lunch.              

But before they leave, Adaine Scrys on her mom and sees her, Aelwen, and Killian with a gem embedded in his open and bloody chest (clearly a puppet after the ritual that almost claimed RIz) traveling through a forest so twisted it looks like it’s underground. Adaine clocks some curse scarring on her mom and on a 15 arcana check wonders if the curse her mom got broken by Garthy was actually the Crown’s curse or maybe something the Falinel put on it for security (which could mean that the Curse on the crown is actually the goddess’s sanctum mentioned last ep). Almost immediately, Aelwen dispels the Scry and it ends. Adaine on a 25 Insight realizes that Aelwen didn’t actually sense the Scry. It was like someone told her it was happening and then she reacted to that. Adaine thinks Kalina might be around.         

On a nat 20 Perception check, Kristen sees Kalina’s eyes in the shadows. Riz--and the rest of the group--can’t see her, but she steps out of the shadows. Kalina starts slinging death threats--at the group and Tracker specifically--and Kristen does her classic Kristen thing of staring down a life or death situation with an insane casualness. Kalina says the only reason the gang is still alive is because they haven’t gotten directly in the way of her and what she wants yet. What does she want? Kristen asks. For them to stay out of the f-ing forest. Kalina vanishes. Kristen immediately loses all bravado and makes her friends dog pile her for comfort which they happily do.               

Kristen gives an arguably Inspiring Speech to give everyone 16 temp HP. Riz on a 28 Investigation roll notices that the grass where Kalina was standing isn’t bent. (The background music goes *BWANG* like Brennan planned it). Riz thinks Kalina wasn’t physically there. In fact, she might not have ever been physically there. He remembers that, in the photo, Pok’s sleeve isn’t bent where Kalina is touching him and people who can’t see Kalina don’t see the wrinkled sleeve they way they would if she was just invisible. And she’s not holding a glass in the photo. She’s holding up her hand and pretending she’s holding one. She might not exist physically at all. He thinks that the thing Aelwen and Arianwyn are doing is to give her corporeal form. They also put together than even if Kalina is somehow in their heads, she can’t really by *in* their heads because she keeps asking questions she would know the answers to already if she could read their minds. Kristen wants to chain up Tracker in the Van to keep her safe from Kalina but Tracker puts the kibosh on that with a quickness (revealing things we kinda already knew about their sex life in the process).

Anyway, let’s split up!

Tinkerer’s Hall

The Owlbear group and the Hangman kinda freak out the gnomes who think they’re being mugged or something but Gorgug wins them over with his gnomish last name and cool Solesian gadgets. They find out Killian needed wax to make candles and some basic spell components.

Tavern

The two Bad Kids possibly least equipped to go to the bar go there and try to get access to Adaine’s mom’s room. They pay Arianwyn’s tab (she left abruptly without paying) and bribe the bartender with an amount of money that will for sure get them put on a watchlist, sweating bullets the entire time, but eventually make it up there to the top suite.

The room is blood spattered, full of candle wax and arcane symbols, and there’s an image Adaine knows her mom drew of a robed, skeletal figure, wearing a crown, etched into the wall. Yikes. 

Shrine

Sandra-Lynn drops off the girls. Tracker casts a light spell and then has to step out. It’s like a vampire at the doorway of a church thing. Kristen sees a religious symbol on the wall and an ancient depiction of a woman in a dark robe and cape, holding a book and a broomstick, next to a small dwelling, black cat on her shoulder. 

Fig sees a charred handprint on the briars in the shrine and recognizes it as her own. She casts Burning Hands on her handprint that’s here for some reason and the fire catches and spreads. Brennan has a lot of fun making fire sound effects. A fiery doorway opens and a woman in armor, with horns and skeletal wings (plus flayed skin under the armor from what they can see--except for her face which is intact and beautiful) walks out and asks for Fig. When Fig identifies herself, the woman says she’s Vraz the Mean from the Nine Hells and Fig has been served. As in legally. As in a subpoena. 

Wild. 

Detention

Fig for Using up Two Luck Points Pre-Excursion Into a Doom Forest to Conceal a Crush 

I adore both Fig generally and Fig in this episode specifically but, truly, what a waste of Luck points at the cusp what possibly could be such a dire moment. And she won’t get those back before a long rest. This storyline is going so slowly. I’ve written (as I’m writing this sentence) 48k words worth of Report Cards and it’s been like what? A week? Less than that? She might not get those back for a while.

Now do I wish she’d made a different decision? Absolutely not. Emily, as always, is ride or die for the roleplay and I both love and respect it. 

But I can high-key see this biting her in the ass.  

Honor Roll

Kristen for Holding her Own Against Kalina

I think this marks K-girl’s first appearance on the Honor Roll and in my opinion (mine being the only one that matters I guess since I have no oversight and am Czar of this arbitrary award) she really earned it. First that clutch perception nat 20 to spot her and then having to hold the entire conversation by herself with no backup because she was the only one who could see her. I think this was actually a really good time for her to use her wild downplaying attitude and she was able to keep Kalina occupied for long enough for Riz to gather some of the most interesting pieces of info about Kalina yet. Very clutch.    

Random Thoughts

For a closer look into character/location descriptions from this episode, you can check out @jamiebluewind‘s posts here and here.

“Has your girl ever not delivered?”/”Yes.”/”Multiple times.”/”I mean, it’s always entertaining when you don’t.”

Lou and Siobhan Re the Hangan: “Can it turn into a Gundam?”/”Is it a transformer?”

Shoutout to Brennan for heading off flying Van shenanigans at the pass. That would have been an Immediate Problem. 

“I have never touched my Dad’s butt, nor do I want to.”

Brennan breaking himself during his first Gilear line of the ep. I wonder if he goes into any Gilear sentence knowing where he’s going, or if it’s all freeform improvisational jazz.

I think it’s really interesting that Fig fully loves Gilear but also still calls him Gilear and not Dad. Not deep meta point or anything. I just think it’s an interesting quirk of the character.   

Fig fully intending to eat an obvious death mushroom and every other party member at the same time slapping it out of her hands. 

I think I’ve mentioned on several occasions that I’m not really a shipper. Which isn’t to say I don’t enjoy romantic relationships in media. It’s just that it’s usually pretty clear which relationship the narrative is setting up so I really don’t get the point in basically campaigning for something that’s clearly going to happen (in which case, just enjoy the progression) or campaigning for something that’s clearly not going to happen and then being disappointed. But I gotta say, this Fig and Ayda has been a ride, I think largely because there was really no way to see this was coming when Ayda was introduced. Like, Tracker for instance was clearly introduced with Kristen in mind, down to being the Moon Cleric to her former Sun Cleric. Not only was Ayda not set up as a romanceable NPC, she very easily could have been skipped as even an option for befriending at all. She didn’t really make herself super available for it and it wasn’t even Fig who struck up a friendship with her initially. It was Adaine. And then Adaine got kidnapped which pushed the two resident Adaine stans together and, what do you know? Sparks (and not just from Ayda’s hair). The organic-ness of the relationship really added something that makes it really interesting and special. 

Also, lol that Fig finally found an age appropriate relationship but she’s also technically 150.

“I’m not gonna mend your piss pants.” 

For Adaine, the peak of luxury is access to fluffy robes which, mood.

OK, just to explicitly state my current pet theory that I alluded to last week, it seems pretty darn likely that Kalina is the familiar of the Mystery goddess. I said that cats are the most iconic witch’s familiar and, this ep, we saw the goddess depicted with a black cat. Plus, Brennan casually but very specifically noted that Kalina isn’t a big-cat. She’s like the tabaxi version of a house cat. And we learned that Kalina seems to be intangible which takes away one thing that was a little off for me--it seemed more like she was spreading a virus but the fact that she is intangible and just visible to people who are “infected” makes it seem more like she herself is the virus. AND, we were introduced to the concept of an Awakened, Sentient animal companion this episode which would be a great thing to do if you’re setting up the fact that this witch goddess turned her cat into a full sentient being and then a tabaxi and then a virus.  

Lol at Tracker giving Sandra-Lynn a Shovel Talk re: Jawbone. 

Riz, upon being questioned by Kristen where he got the photo of her for the “Casual” conspiracy wall he’s making: Look, you take pictures you hang them.

I want the Bad Kids to keep the motto of, “Spring Break!” year round. I want them to use it forever. I want them to be in their 30s--well out of school--and run into a deadly situation in the middle of Winter yelling, “I believe in you! Spring Break!” while very, very confused bystanders watch them. That’s really what friendship is about. Confusing the hell out of strangers with your in-jokes. 

Between last week of Fantasy High and this week of CritRole, I think a lot of people just learned what the Hallow spell is. 

“Just by being here we’re stealing. I’m like Robin Hood.”

Hangman: No rules!/Adaine: Some rules!

Guys I was SO concerned that Fig was gonna pull a Fabian and do something Concerning without any party support. So happy she decided to just get her kisses in instead. And then at the end of the ep when the two most chaotic party members were given a hell door that it 1000% seemed like they were gonna jump through but were ust handed legal paperwork instead.  

Figs comment about one of the best parts of friendship being getting to be a “chorus of nonsense” together without regard for what’s being said is so real.

I love the D&D gag of the party members who are not at an intense moment interjecting with whatever nonsense they’re doing. 

Everyone holding their collective breaths and then breaking as Emily succumbs to the urge to Touch a Thing. “You simply must.”

Ayda thinks “Choke on grapes, bitch,” is an excellent threat, and I agree.

Who cares for Ayda when she’s a newborn? Or is she reborn old enough to take care of herself? Also, update: Aguefort even worse dad than initially thought. 

Fig skateboarding away and dropping invisibility so Ayda can see and then later kissing her and Ayda going full visible are such cinematic moments. Well, the second one is at least. The first is just extremely funny. 

“I’m not gonna kiss the shrimp, Kristen. It’s dead, and we killed it.”

“I desperately and only want you to stay. And the only thing I want to do more than stay is do something for you” Why does Brennan keep dropping these raw ass lines casually in his high school D&D game?

“Can I get a help action from the jets of the hot tub?”

One little moment I loved from this ep was Mira being confused by the concept of a rock star and Adaine translating that she’s a bard/troubadour. I also just love the word troubadour. We shouldn’t have ever stopped using it. 

“That makes me nervous. Everything makes me nervous. Sure, why not.” Mood.

Mira also makes a comment about how diverse the group is that did *not* sound like a positive or even neutral statement and, listen, I’m getting Daybreak vibes my dudes.

Very funny every time we’re reminded that the reason the Bad Kids are doing this is because it’s a school project. 

Interesting character detail that Adaine started off talking about Aelwen and Arianwyn with distancing language but eventually slipped back into just calling them her mom and sister. 

A note in case it’s relevant later: Nuathra said that Crafty--his druid companion--was not a fan of cleric stuff, thought it was nonsense, and tried to avoid it at all costs. 

Fabian re Nuathra: What did the fox say?

Kristen asks Kalina’s name and she says, “You can call me Kalina,” which is subtly different than, “My name is Kalina,” which is probably just a turn of phrase and not plot relevant but I’ve been reading a lot of Fae stuff recently and a hyper-aware of weasel-out wording right now. 

“You good?”/”Now that I’m being pressed into the grass by all my friends? Yes.”

Adaine to Riz’s earlier encounter with Kalina: That was all you? You did all that damage to yourself?

I love Fig’s outrage at Adaine joking that she uses Detect Thoughts. The idea of, “We kill people and break into places and Catfish adult men but we DO NOT Detect Thoughts on each other that is the LINE.”

Kristen giving herself a sexy roleplay promotions from Officer up to Colonel was killing me. That whole thing was such a good bit and Ally and Brennan were on the same page immediately.  

Can’t wait to see the demonic (or is that devilish?) legal system so I can tell y’all how accurate it is and use something I learned in law school for once in my life. (Note: I am a lawyer, but you’d be surprised how unhelpful law school is to actually being a lawyer). 

Wonder what that subpoena was for. Maybe something involving Gorthalax or the wall? I’m trying to think of what they’d have jurisdiction over. She said the dude she works under is on the Sloth level of hell. 

Siobhan mentioned she has good Portent rolls right now which is comforting to hear. Lol, imagine if she had also decided to go full teenager this episode and use them to ferret out Fig’s crush.   

I need you to know that, in this same week (all within 48 hours of each other), between CritRole, Naddpod, The Good Place finale, I was really just drowning in content and emotions. 

The only crit of the ep is a nat 20 from Kristen. 

[throwing-summers-at-the-walls]

Hi, i hope you are feeling good! Im better than yesterday so i can finally answer you. First of all: i am so happy that you shared your fanfiction! i had a great time reading it! Im always open for more recs. Maybe your all time favorites? Or if you know some good h/c these are always welcome :) And YESSS please send me a link to your fanvids. -- yeah 13rw was super cursed. haha i also watched season 1 but thankfully i was able to sto watching becaue i could feel it making me feel bad (1)

I agree the suicide scene was just cringe (but i think i remember reading somewhere that they cut it out? idk) and overall this show just gave me the feeling that there was no hope and things are always getting worse instead of better and i hated that. but enough of that cursed show. can i just say i really admire how open you are about your feelings (like being suicidal and that) i realy, really admire this about you. i have so much respect for you that you can just share your feelings here (2)

I have never heard of ace attorney but that story you described sounds really good. and i get reading sth that isnt good for you and still doing it (because im a dumb bitch too :D) -- okay i might accept that Root will never grow on you (but i thought so too and look at me now :D) but i havent fully given up yet :)-- yes thats the girl. i think it was really sweet when she said that to Shaw. and i think Shaw appreciated it that someone tried to figure her out instead of just writting her off (3)

Shaw is really cool and definately also a badass and in combination with John its just great! but you will have to suffer trough some Shoot.  but maybe, maybe you will end up not hating Root. hope dies last (idk how the saying goes in english, sorry). -- Did you ever ship Caresse (in a romantic way)? cause sometimes i do and sometimes i dont and i get so confused about it :) but i think most of the time i like them more as friends. anyway her death really sucked and you are right with (4)

her death and them losing the library it felt like a different show (i mean i guess it was a different show then). i kinda get your feelings about the destroyed library because i also really loved it (and im really bad with change) but i dont think it affected me as much as you. but yeah i still missed the library very much. and while the subway is a really cool new place its not the same. (also the subway is super dark cause its underground and idk it just makes the whole thing less homey) (5)

Yes he is everything! such a great, interesting character and i wish there were more John-centric episodes! (like ones that explored his character more). that was one of my biggest dislikes of the later seasons that John wasnt featured as much anymore. i think he chuckled a few times in the show but a real laugh? i cant remember one :(  -- He did promise Joss to talk to Tyler so @show were is that talk? -- if seen the vid its awesome! thehiddenmemory has some great poi vids! (6)

yes i think so too. Like Grace would probably be relived and thankful that Harold is still alive and maybe they would even try again but eventually she would figure out that she cant trust him after lying to him for so long or sth like that and Harold would ofc realize that he is in love with someone else now. And then he finds out that John is still alive but stayed away cause he didnt want to get in the way of Harold/Grace. But then Harold comes back. And when they meet again John is like (7)

you came back for the machine? what about Grace. But Harold tells him he came back for John not the machine and then they kiss and have a happy live with Bear (sorry i got a little carried away here :D). -- Yeah Zoe is really hot and she needed more screen time! -- i hope you have a good day and i hope i havent messed up the numbers on the asks! :)

Hi ! I'm finally free from the resits, I hope you're doing okay with your thesis 💛

Sorry for replying late, there was the exam resits, and I read a bunch of fics, then I fell into pokémon and started bingewatching it. (Also I had a breakdown during therapy today so I'm gonna finish writing my answer to distract myself - it's been sitting in my drafts for so long rip)

Thank you !! It was a very personal thing, I'm really happy you liked it !! Your support and your comment made me thrive 💛💛

Tbh I was surprised to see it get kudos given that the only intended audience was my self projecting ass 🤣

So, my fav fics (my fav fic ever is in French, rip to y'all bc it's so good):

I am, I am, I am by RavenWhitecastle

Actually check the entire series this work belongs to: The Sinner and the Saint. I haven't finished it yet but I love it (I just skipped the explicit fics bc I don't like smut or sub!John)

Breaking All The Rules by talkingtothesky

Outsider Perspective by Neery

A Really Private Person by astolat

Hamartia (the hero's fatal flaw) by astolat

If Only for Tonight by spacemutineer

From Here, Where? by AKMars

Stroll by TheaNishimori

and the world was gone by lunarcorvid

a light that never goes out by vindicatedtruth

Limitations. by Michaelssw0rd

Reel you in and spit you out by Michaelssw0rd

All I Want For Christmas Is You by richmahogany

By What Power I Am Made Bold by brinnanza

Aftershocks by darringtons

At Certain Hours It All Breaks Down by nogoaway

construction of a kingdom by the_ragnarok

You Take Me Higher Than I've Gone by talkingtothesky

All Together Now by beadedslipper

I'll Let the Waters Still by brinnanza

Birthday Tradition by talkingtothesky

Things My Father Taught Me by KRyn

Truth is in the Eye of the Beholder by infiniteeight

Better Luck This Time by Lisztful

Motivations by JenNova

What's On the Table by cortue

In Another Life by Della19

I Thought We Already Were by talkingtothesky

Misunderstandings by thisstarvingartist

This is already fucking long omg so for the h/c: my bookmarks filtered with Rinch and h/c

Here's my playlist, it's mostly Rinch, but there are a few not Rinch vids, plus some scenes I like

This is long enough already, so it's time for a read more. Also, warning, we be talking about suicide

The portrayal of suicide is cringe most of the time anyway. If my suicidal ass can find a list of suicide methods and their lethality in 2 mins on Google you'd think writers who are supposed to do some research would be able to find them too but no they're like "ah yes slicing wrists" even though it's literally the shittiest method 🙄 (I just don't understand why slicing wrists seems to be such a popular method in the collective imagination ? It's weird.) At least in 13rw she took aspirin and cut herself vertically instead of horizontally but still, no hesitation wounds, and she dies even though she only got 4 wounds iirc ? I know more about jumping off bridges than slicing wrists, but it kinda sounds like bullshit to me. Also Netflix once suggested "beyond the reasons" to me, it's a sort of discussion with the cast and crew of 13rw and the only thing I remember is a moment of intellectual masturbation abt how they "opened a discussion abt suicide" 😬😬😬

They may have cut it out it's not impossible, idk I didn't hear about it, but it's not like I look for info about this dumpster fire lol. Maybe they faced backlash ? Wouldn't be surprised given how shit the show was. And yeah it has a hopeless vibe, I mean that's how it be when you're suicidal, but I didn't like it either.

You're sweet 💜💜 it's interesting that you find it respectable or admirable, I don't have an external point of view, so I'm just like 🤷 it is what it is. I understand where you're coming from though, I guess it's still quite a taboo subject, and suicidal people don't always feel comfortable talking about it, so me throwing around that I jumped off a bridge must be surprising. I'm detached enough from my suicide attempt that I'm able to talk about it without much of a problem, and I'm not really suicidal anymore.

Dumb bitches unite 👏👏👏 we be out there reading shit we shouldn't read

Yeah I think it's nice how the show didn't portray Shaw as a bad person for not having "normal feelings". Well, hope makes one live as we say in French (idk the English saying either lol) but don't hold much hope about me liking Root lmao

I used to ship careese bc they kissed in the crossing, but then I read some Rinch fics and I just ended up falling into it to the point where I stopped caring about careese. Now I think their relationship works better as a friendship.

Yeah all that change really puts me off... It just gives me "bad spin-off" vibes. Especially since there is less John :( and less Rinch :((((

Lmao yeah I just have a lot of feelings about early poi hgkfglrk. Also :/ I'm sad about the subway being less homey pls I just want happiness ?? I swear this show destroys my heart on top of owning my last braincell (brb changing my blog title to this lmao)

Mood I need all the John-centric eps, give me m o r e characterization and development and backstory and feelings hhhhhhh. I love him so much I just wanna spend more time with him. And that's what fics are for ! Yeah thehiddenmemory is so talented ! Astolat made some good ones too, on top of writing really good fics ! (Our fandom has been blessed with the presence of one of the ao3 founders hell yeah)

Also, remember how we talked abt the poi subreddit ? The other day I left a comment on there, wild I know. It wasn't a discussion about the last seasons though, I'm not crazy, it was about the impact poi had in our lives so I said it literally taught me English. Who knows maybe sometimes I'll comment again lol. I just don't wanna meet one of those people who prefer late poi over early poi.

Allow me to uuuuh write something based on what you said. Don't ask me how John survived with no major injuries, my man got that Thick Plot Armor alright. Hope you appreciate me getting carried away sjdkdksk it's kinda rushed and the first part isn't that good bc idk how to write Grace I'm just here for that sweet sweet Rinch stuff

Harold is eating breakfast with Grace in her kitchen – he can't think of her home as his home – when his phone vibrates. It's a text from the machine. It's a surprise, she barely contacted him since... He blocks the thoughts and the images coming to his mind. The machine sent him a picture. When he opens it, his heart misses a beat. Right here on his screen is a silhouette he thought he would never see again. His phone vibrates again. Another picture, this time it's unmistakably John, wearing his signature suit, Bear next to him. Transfixed, he stares at his phone until he feels Grace gently touching his arm. She goes straight to the point.

"Is it John ?" He looks up in confusion, but before he can say anything, she adds, "I hear you call him in your sleep every night."

"It's him, yes." He doesn't want to explain. He only wants to see John, to touch him, to tell him how much he loves him.

"You should go back to him. I like you, Harold. I am deeply relieved to see you alive. But I've been thinking, and... It's not working. This, us... You aren't really the man I fell in love with, the man I grieved... I can't trust you anymore." She doesn't say 'You lied to me' but Harold hears it all the same.

~

Harold sits on their bench. The machine indicated John often comes here. Soon enough, his arms are full of Bear, and John is standing in front of him.

"John. How are you ?" he asks when Bear finally calms down.

"Busy. And you ?"

Harold eyes him suspiciously – John once said he was busy when he was bleeding and way too close to death – but he seems to be well.

"I'm fine." He doesn't have time for awkward small talk." I thought you were dead. Why didn't you contact me ?"

"The machine told me you were with Grace. I thought you wanted to come back to your previous life. I didn't want to crash into it and ruin what you had."

Harold wants to be angry at him, but he understands. He did the same with Grace.

"You would never ruin anything. Besides, my relationship with Grace... didn't survive my lies. She's very dear to my heart, but she's a part of my previous life, as you said."

"So you came back for the machine, and the numbers, like the good old times ?"

Harold gets up from the bench.

"I came back for you. You are an important part of my life. The most important part."

John smiles, finally. He takes a step towards Harold, they're so close they could kiss. Harold reaches out, grips his shirt and slowly inches closer. He's still afraid of being rejected but John wraps his arm around him and kisses him. The kiss is over too soon. John's smile is even wider when they part.

"You're the most important part of my life too," he says before kissing Harold again. "You will stay ?"

"Always."

Damn I live for sappy Rinch stuff.

Bitches decided that Harold saying "always" is peak Rinch. It's me I'm bitches.

Also ofc I had to make a reference to number crunch, who do you think I am

Anyway. I hope you have a good day ! 💛

[swearronchanel]

9.08

wow i cant even think too busy crying

Reggie and Fred 🥰

Ok but is setting all this shit on fire in the middle of the street not some barbaric ass move or is it just me LMAO?

Trixie looks great as always, I still want the white hoops

NURSE CRANE AND THE WRESTLING LMAOAOAO GET OUT LOVE IT

that’s a pretty veil

Shot gun wedding time

This guy is hella familiar ?? Was he on Downton or something?

Poor Elsie

Val giving me sailor vibes lol

Phyllis gives me the vibe of older lady’s who chug beer and yell from the nosebleed seats at baseball games aka me in 40 years

How dare you say Nonnatus’ is unimportant mr tight vest LMAO

I love that Phyllis is making him a sweater LMAO why is it so funny to me

DISCOTECH, Sister Hilda is deff the “cool” nun

You’re telling me that poplar will throw a fundraiser/charity sale thing  for anything BUT to save their building??

Sister J’s voice breaking 😢

SAVE NONNATUS 1k65

THEY NEED RENT MONEY

Oh noo they’re gonna kill Elsie off today huh

I forgot Phyllis is a vegetarian, good on her I could never lmao

“Don’t go crying, not in all that eye black” 😭

Throwing up blood oh shit not good

Omg cancer of the esophagus? Jesus

WAIT HE HAS TWO BABY MOMMAS??? BIG YIKESS

SISTER HILDA SHOWING MCNULTY HOW TO DANCE LMAOAOAOA why do I love this?

SISTER PJ’s PAMPHLET “HOW TO DANCE SOCIALLy” LMAOO

“No one wears plimsoles to the discotech” 😂 plimsoles are like white sneakers right?

you really have to be an addict to wanna play with needles and inject yourself all the time 🥴 Issa no from me

The midwife with the curly perm 🤣

Ok I agree sister Hilda deff has a soothing voice. Her accent is very velvet-y

Poor Val this is so heartbreaking 💔Let me call my grandmas after this

Wow there goes my stream 🤬🙄

ok I’m back

“Every land mark I ever knew seems to be falling down” 💔

Sister J and Lucille comforting Val ugh this is too many feels

I can’t wait till this cheating ass mf gets caught LMAO

OFC Phyllis would be the one to notice the missing drogas

Fred checking his watch is a mood like he does not have the time for this shit LMAO

Councilor Buckle you better step it up LMAO

TELL HER PHYLLIS!

Sister Hilda’s voice is actually calming me rn LMAO ((my laptop has been stressing me out all day))

LMAO THIS IS IT OMG

HE CAUGHT

SMACK HIM UP MOMMA!!!!

HE DESERVES MORE THAN A HANDBAG TO THE HEAD HE NEEDA CATCH THESE MF HANDS LMAOAOOA

Phyllis is like what the fuck is going on here today??🤦🏼‍♀️😂

Elsie coming home 😢my freaking heart

Now they’re both gonna be in the maternity home OFC

Ugh I cant deal this hits too close

LET TRIXIE SPEAK

ALSO LET ME SIGN THE PETITION

“Oh no” LMAO ofc they’re put next to each other

NOW EDDIE SHOWS UP OMG GET OUT LMAO

“You’re loving her. That’s the only medicine she wants” stop omg my heart 💔😭

CTM don’t you dare make me feel bad for this guy lmaoo

Sister MJ 🥺 angel on earth

“The good stuff” is that not suspicious to anyone who doesn’t already know?

“She was here the night you were born. I recollect her” Ok I’m hysterical bye

Sister Hilda is underrated and I’ll keep saying it lol

Eddie with the 2 bouquets 😂

“I grew up arching women brawling in the street...but I’m not gonna fight you for him.” Remember the brawl from the pilot ep

YES TRIXIE YOU SPEAK!!!

“They gritted their teeth and that’s just what I’m doing now” ugh this is too much

I won’t ever have a baby bc Phyllis Crane can’t be my midwife so why bother LMAOO jkkk

poor Petra tho :((

“A memory like a firework exploded in my mind”

GRATITUDE LETTERS 🥺

GOD D*MN IT SISTER MJ HAS DONE IT AGAIN

“I was never more proud of you when I saw you wearing that [nonnatus uniform]” 😭😭😭

I am in actual tears and I can not deal

And McNulty is down

GOD SISTER FRANCES WHERE IS THAT VOW OF SILENCE BC UR NOT HELPING LMAO

The community rallying for Nonnatus we STAN 

ARE THEY SAYING “PISS OFF OF OUR MIDWIFES” LMAOO I CANT HEAR AND HAVE NO SUBTITLES RIP

“I prefer to be referred to as NURSE Franklin in a professional setting” YES MY QUEEN !!! TELL HIM

NURSE BEATRIX FRANKLIN SAID DOWN WITH THE PATRIARCHY!!

THIS IS THE MOMENT I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR !!!

“YOU HAVE NEVER ONCE CALLED US BY OUR NAME!! BUT DO NOT THINK WE WILL NOT BE MISSED IF YOU WIPE US OUT COMPLETELY” YOU FUCKING GOO BEATRIX OMGG WHAT A DAMN GOOD SPEECH!!!

BUDGET FUCKING RESTORED HELL YEA

for 12 months is that catch but you know SCREW YOUR CATCH, Nonnatus will go on somehow as long as NURSE Franklin has a say!!!

I mean at least for series 11 they have to make do somehow? We’ll see

NOOO OMG ELSIE CAN’T DIE WHILE VAL ISN’T THERE

I’m literally drowning in my own tears Oh my god

now they’re singing Amazing Grace might as well just rip my heart out with your bare hands 💔😭😭😭😭

Val with the ice cream cone ugh 😢it’s so sad

Reminds me of how I missed my abuelo passing by literally 7 mins. After a 5 hour drive, legit 7 mins late...

They tried to make McNulty go to rehab but he said no, no, noooooo

IM SORRY I NEED TO MAKE MYSELF LAUGH BC IM LITERALLY A SOBBING MESS

I wonder why they never bring up Patrick’s mental health anymore?  like he wan’t magically cured for life 

the “for now” sign on Nonnatus omg

LMDOAOAOA THE FIREWORK OMGGG

FRED THANKS FOR EVERY LAUGH

TRIXIE LOOKS GREAT AND HAD THE RIGHT IDEA LMAO

“I love you Nurse Anderson” MY HEART MAY BE REPAIRED, GIVE ME A WEDDING

Petra lost the baby aww poor gal

wow i’m emo but they all look happy during the bonfire 🥺

Poor Val is breaking but at least she’s got her gals

“Welcome the darkness, embrace it as a canopy from which the stars can hang, for there are always stars when we are where we ought to be...The darkness is beautiful for how else can we shine?”✨✨😭😭😭

She said more that I loved but couldn’t hear it all over the sound of my UGLY CryING

This reminds me of what Sister Hilda said a few eps back ugh I’m having too many feelings let me log off until Christmas 

[thotsupport]

ms heathcote turn on ur location i just wanna talk. i just wanna talk

im so fucking disappointed by the new episode. it was bad.... an episode of KILLING EVE!!! was bad !!!!! do u know how fucking awful that is.... how hard that is..... it has not had a single bad episode or even like bad MINUTE. 

rest is under a read more bc i have adhd and dont know how to explain my thoughts in less than 1000 words. this is a rant post ladies be warned of spoilers ig. its long 

ik everyone was worried about the writer change and we had a reason to be... this show walks such a thin line w its humor and all of its characters, esp eve and villanelle. so it was always going to be like, whoever gets put in charge of new seasons either gets it or they dont. but wow! wow huh

idek if i should be blaming ms heathcote, phoebe and emerald for leaving, or whoever signed off on this shit bc whew !! it sucked . that first minute of the wedding reception scene hit and u knew that things were off and this was rly not going to be what we hoped. they hyped us up for the wedding shit but it was absolutely pointless, when they couldve done SO MUCH w it. and that rly set the tone for the whole rest of the ep tbh

characters are ALL so out of character, stale as shit, and have basically been made into caricatures of themselves. the new characters that have been introduced have no substance. i think the most villanelle-like thing v did in the entire ep was pour the shop owner’s spice bag onto her face to mock dasha. and we’re really supposed to believe she thinks she killed eve? the top tier assassin we’ve watched for 2 seasons who kills people for a living? that  didnt sit well with me since the trailer, like it just feels unrealistic and contradictory as hell to their whole relationship. maybe we’re being faked out and she knew all along, which would be great !! but this first episode does not give me any hope for that bc it requires some decent writing

and now they kill kenny??? in the first fucking episode?? like ok maybe sean delaney said im signing out bye, which is like ok cool fine, so they had to write him out. but like THAT ? when he started hearing noises i went “if they kill kenny rn i dont think i can forgive them” LET ME HONK MY NOSE REAL QUICK. i sat there for like 5 min w my hand over my mouth. a cheap ass no build up death scene out of nowhere, just for shock value. is it crack? is that what you smoke? that entire sequence was so fucking bad. sloppy.... the predictability......my dvr cut off the last min so i had to look it up later, but what i imagined the ending was like ended up being right to a t, which is rly sad!!!. i do not write for this show! i should not be able to guess the end of the episode down to the song they use!! 

they tried to set his death up w whatever he was finding out online, but sis.........what a mess. and kenny was p much the only one from the first seasons they did a decent job of writing too 🙄

every interaction between characters, every character’s actions, the tone of every scene, the humor, the weird location cuts, rushed sequences, no build up or payoff to anything trying to be established...... mess. all of it fell flat.

anyway.... killing eve fell victim to change of writers combined w the classic ‘we already have a loyal established audience so we dont have to try as hard’ downhill slide. i hope the season gets a lot better from here but that first ep doesnt make me too hopeful. like am i going to keep watching no matter what? yes! i am a clown!! i want to see what happens. the cast will always be amazing. but let’s not pretend it was great

i probably sound harsh as hell but i do not care !! not a bit ! this show has been so fucking good and of course im going to be upset if it gets fucked up. miss 2020 rly came in and said we get nothing this year huh. not one crumb

[merinnan]

DMBJ Episode 10

Episode 10, the final episode for season 1! 

 We begin Episode 10 with the Xiaoge Rescue Count at 10 for Wu Xie, 14 for the protagonists, 15 for everyone 

 And the Wu Xie Swoon Count at 5

- We open back up on a slight recap of Wu Xie being a little shit, and it's delightful 

- I love how when Wu Xie sits in the other chair, the lead boduguard dude is like surprised Pikachu face, Huo Xiuxiu is shocked, and Xie Yuchen is like, hmmm, interesting

- And Granny just closes her eyes with a brief sigh 

- For she has triggered stubborn little shit Wu Xie 

- And I think she knows it 

- She's like, enough of this shit, and Pangzi is like, nope, my turn to stir it up

- Some subtle threats, a brief scuffle, and now what are you up to, Pangzi? 

- Oh, they settled down a bit once he left, being the troublemaker. Or at least the over troublemaker 

- And now Xie Yuchen playing a bit of a peacemaker 

- Hmm, I wonder who the 'friend' in question is?

- Just stay sitting in the seat until half past four 

- Simple tasks like that are never simple 

- So now I'm super curious what's going to happen between now and 4:30 

- Wu Xie is suspicious. Because he's smart like that. 

- Oh, another fishy with sneks!

- And god, the auctioneer lady's wig is AWFUL 

- Oooh, there's something important or weird about the left side seats in the upper floors. 

- Let's see what happens here 

- lol, the attendant's face when she came in and saw Wu Xie sitting in that chair

- There is apparently Some History with these chairs 

- Xiaogeeeeee   

 - God, Chengcheng, food, and money. Can't she just like shut up about it for once? 

- I feel like I'm missing something with this lantern here. I don't get why everyone is staring at it.

- Or why everyone is applauding once it's put up 

- Yes, Xiaoge is definitely dressed like a staff member. And staring up where Wu Xie is.

- Pangzi's back, and evidently now knows about the seat 

- Oh, so apparently the lantern is tied to Wu Xie sitting in the seat 

- It's creating quite a stir 

- Oh, Wu Xie now seems to realise what this is, I think?

- Huh, I thought it was just me thinking that using bells for bidding was odd, but no, Pangzi has confirmed that the auctioneer girl is pretty good to be able to tell which bell is which 

- Her hearing used as a detection tool. Why am I now thinking of Liu Sang?

- Oh shit. That's what that means. 

- And that's why Granny is so fucking smug about it. 

- Ouch. 

- It's okay, it's the last episode, so I'm sure it'll turn out fine. 

- WOW her hearing is good to pick that up 

- God damn it Pangzi 

- Why do you always have to start shit like this?

- I think Xiaoge realises his Wu Xie is about to be in trouble

- I like these little hints we're seeing of early Xiao Sanye

- Lol, Pangzi pulls out a hidden baton, all the grey suits pull out batons, and he looks so shocked that he's not the only one with one 

 - Go, Pangzi, go! 

- Oh, ouch 

- Ahahah, thank you, Wu Xie. This is the Wu Xie I like to see. 

- Oh, kicking a girl like that, tsk tsk

- Them trying to drag Wu Xie out his chair, and him clinging on for dear life 

 - He's so stubborn. I love him. 

- Granny casually drinking tea while there's this huge fight going on around her 

- Xiaoge keeping an eye on things

- OH YOU CHEATING BITCH 

- Pangzi to the rescue, keeping the chair propped up! 

- But like 

- FUCK YOU YOU CHEATING BITCH 

- YES TIME UP HE WON YOU LOST 

- And now Wu Xie enters the fray 

- Hahaha, good girl, Chengcheng. Like, I still don't like or trust you, but sometimes you do good.

- Granny was NOT expecting the silly little girl to take out her guy like that 

- I like Yuchen's reactions here. Everyone else seems either surprised, or angry, or smug, and he's just like "...this is interesting." 

- I know Xiaoge's gonna turn up any second now, and I can't wait

- But for now, I'm enjoying Pangzi being a badass, kicking people down stairs 

- Yuchen to the rescue! Nice 

- And Wu Xie thinks he looks familiar, so now I'm wondering where they know each other from

- XIAOGE! YES! Just casually walking out from the side with his hands in his pockets. Shit is about to get real

- Xiaoge Rescue Count is now 10 for Wu Xie, 15 for the protagonists, 16 for everyone

- It seems Granny has sent her guys after them 

- Wu Xie's expression is like "you have to be fucking kidding me" 

- Pangzi is like, yes, time for a fight! 

- I can't entirely blame her, because Wu Xie is still baby and has not yet developed the reputation that he'll have later on

- But I certainly see where his reputation is starting 

- This ep is confirming that Pangzi is a much better character outside the Lu tomb. It's as if Pangzi in the tomb was a doppelganger with a different personality that's similar enough to fool people into thinking it's real

- Pangzi beating up Granny's guys while Wu Xie and High Shao...just stand and watch? 

- Oh, now they're finally trying to run 

- Pangzi continuing to single-handedly keep the Huo guys at bay 

- A narrow alleyway seems like a bad place to run into, guys

- Grey suited guys have obviously never learned that you should never split the party 

- No, I'm not sure you're safe just yet, guys. Maybe hide a bit longer. 

- Your shoes aren't exactly quiet, since they're dress shoes 

- Wu Xie still proving that he's the smart one

- Chengcheng, they already know who you are. Forget the dumb phone. 

- Unless you have some ~~secrets~~ on there. Like who you really work for? 

- Wu Xie, baby, no, don't do that - You're too nice sometimes 

- You're a good boy, too, High Shao

- AND THERE WE GO 

- I KNEW SHE COULDN'T BE TRUSTED 

- I'm wondering why it took her so long to make her move 

- Wu Xie Swoon Count: 6

- Wu Xie, you still don't get it, do you?

- Chengcheng, why are you surprised at his naivete? You've been pretending to be his friend for how long now? Haven't you realised yet that that's just who he is? 

- I'm impressed Wu Xie managed to stand up with his ankles tied like that

- She's not wrong, they were all fucking idiots when it came to just trusting her like that 

- No, Wu Xie, she's not your friend 

- I'm confused. If she wanted the fishy, why didn't she just take it once she knew Wu Xie had it? Or did she know there were 2 & she wants both of them?

- I'm pretty sure he didn't give his away anywhere, and he told Granny he had it, so his can't be the one at the auction. 

- Wu Xie, Wu Xie, Wu Xie. She doesn't care. It's sweet that you're trying, and you wouldn't be Wu Xie if you didn't, but it's not going to work.

- No, sweetie, A-Ning is so much better than you are. She's at least honest about who she is, and has some kind of ethics. 

- Oooh, who's come with a motorbike. I can think of three possibilities. Now we'll see which one it is. 

- Oh, and it was one I didn't think of

- I'll give her credit for being a good actress, though. Or, at least, she's good at pretending to be a silly, flighty girl. I'm not sure if she knows how to put on a different act than that.

- How did she miss that she dragged them next to a broken bottle? Like, even being in a hurry I feel that that's something she should have noticed. It's not like it's hidden, it's just right there under the window where she put them.

- Oh, she's a pretty good fighter, too. 

- Zipties? Oh, honey. Wu Xie, you need to learn how to break zipties without needing something sharp to cut them. 

- I'm sure Ershu can have Heiye teach you, if Xiaoge doesn't teach you first 

- A pink car. OMG. That is such a cliche.

- And hey, it's Huo Xiuxiu. For a sec I thought it was going to be Chengcheng, and if it was, I was gonna be so mad that she'd somehow got a custom pink car just waiting for her in Beijing 

- But I can accept Huo Xiuxiu having a pink car

- And they're back home already? Just like that, with no other explanations? 

- Yes, Sanshu, you were rather careless 

- Hang on, how did they know the guy's name was Qiu Dekao? I mean, I get that Sanshu might have, but why was the name familiar to the boys?

- Poor Sanshu, so cut up about Wenjin's niece turning out to be a fake 

- And now, mysterious photograph of mystery that High Shao has found online 

- Aaah, 20 year old photo of Sanshu and Xiaoge (and others) 

- I know what's coming up next, then!

- Well, not in the like 5 mins left of the season 

- But maybe in season 2 

- Why are they now talking about some box that hasn't been mentioned at all so far? 

- Sanshu's at-home outfit is pretty smart, though. That subtly patterned white shirt with black slacks and black vest

- It seems a lot of convenient fires conveniently burn important documents in DMBJ shows 

- Yes, Sanshu, how can they look so alike 

- I wonder what it is that you've just realised, that's so important you just abruptly threw Wu Xie & High Shao out and locked the door behind them

- Did they send the photo to Pangzi as well? Since he began talking about Xiaoge being a mummy as soon as they called him 

- Ah, there are two fishys. I didn't miss something there. 

- Hm. Messy shoes in the entryway. That's not a good sign. 

- Ofc Sanshu has gone & run off on them

- Probably doesn't want to drag them into a mess again 

- After how the last one went 

- And especially with that gang after the same kind of stuff 

- It's okay, Wu Xie, Xiaoge might have left without saying goodbye but he was still watching out for you when it mattered

And with that little narrated epilogue, both episode 10 and season 1 come to an end! 

Season 1 Xiaoge Rescue Count was 10 for Wu Xie, 15 for the protagonists, 16 for everyone 

Season 1 Wu Xie Swoon Count was 6 

[rqs902]

.

IS THAT WHO I THINK IT IS 

ITS MY BOY ENYU!!!! ON THE FRONT PAGE???? okay also a big deal for zhaohao and li hao too!!!

ok now into part 2 of the ep

interesting that they focused on junhao for everybody. can understand he probably has the most different and struggle experience so probably more interesting for dramas sake lol im surprised they dont spend more time on shengen, considering his popularity. 

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAA JUNHAO FREAKING OUT over the fact that they only learned the dance for 40 mins. LOL thats the level of tyger + kou cong + shengen, i can imagine the struggle of the yang guang nan hai group in comparison AHAHA i just imagine him running down the hall freaking out like HOW DID THEY LEARN THE DANCE IN JUST ONE CLASS WHAT ARE THESE PEOPLE 

lollll “theyre all dachang boys” “theyre all zhang yixing’s students” HAHAHAH you know even though he is slightly struggling compared to the rest, he aint bad and theyre all taking it light hearted with laughter so seems like a good learning environment! and he’s confident he’ll get it LOL thats good! i think thats what makes him so amusing 

HAHAHA i love how lin mo just keeps giggling at junhao like he genuinely just finds him so amusing LOL yay for making new friends 

awww bc junhao’s always been a leader i feel like for him to finally feel like hes being taken care of is so nice. i have absolute confidence that this group will treat him kindly. AW HE CALLED HIM MOMO 

im still disappointed they have YET to show zhan yu’s funny/strange personality and this wouldve been a great opportunity bc hes surrounded by friends he’s comfortable with!! like his friendship with kou cong! or akey and lin mo! but sigh...

THEY PUT ZHAN YU IN THE FRONT FOR THE SEXUAL LINE HAHAHHA PERFECT BUT I SEE LIN MO BEING ONE OF THE ONLY ONES NOT SHOWING HIS ABS HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAA

wow the lyrics are so fitting for lin mo to scream LOL but also ay his vocals?! aw im glad they put in a little rap for shengen and akey! honestly was kinda hoping for more bc they havent had a proper stage together before and i feel like itd be awesome but also junhao and zhan yu vocalization at the end was on point!!

lol all the kids being like zhang pd’s words are so detailed and professional... sigh theyve been missing out until now 

im glad they really pointed out how each member of this team did well! they really all did a great job with each of their parts, and they each got a little part to shine, and when put together, it was a complete performance. im proud of them and happy for them!

aw.... i feel like we’ve been waiting so long to hear lin mo get complimented.... i feel like it’s been since qcyn namanana that we’ve been waiting for him to redeem himself and climb back up to the peak. ugh its been nearly a year and a half. im just so terrified of whats gonna happen next bc im way too skeptical at this point to expect this high to continue, esp with what happened after namanana last time......... but for now, im happy. relieved hes finally getting the recognition he deserves and im happy that hes happy. lol i was also half scared we were gonna get spirit of the knight-ed again with his pink hair (nightmare flashbacks to lin mo and changxi’s deletion from that perf) i dont think ill ever get over that :( i feel like as a lin mo stan, ive been trained to not keep my hopes up and to prepare for the worst bc hes the type of person who just always gets the short end of the stick, it feels like. 

aw the part when they go back to the waiting room and jin fan is waiting for them with an encouraging smile and the whole exchange of "帥的真的帥的" "哇~可以吧" "我沒想到" "那必須的" our leader did them proud :’) 

ugh the part where luo jie calls them and tells them he can’t come back........ heart breaking. i can see why lin ran and xikan would be really affected. lin ran has been luo jie’s go-to since he left and knowing how their usual friendship involves making fun of one another and jokingly complaining about each other, it hits hard when lin ran says he cried his eyes out. it hurts that they didnt get to share the stage again before he left. xikan may not have shared the stage with luo jie during ip, but hes known him since then and has been with him through both rounds here. it interesting bc i feel like the namanana perf was very light hearted on qcyn but i cant see that happening here, esp with their outfits? 

aw shiwei and chaowen taking charge to raise their spirits :’) 

lin ran’s voice fits so well with this song wow! i really like his lines! also lol i didnt know xikan would have abs but okay and tbh im always hesitant about dances with props bc it always is so easy to look messy..... like every slight difference in angle in the way you hold your arms is immediately magnified 

and like sxl’s fan is obviously broken and having performed fan dances myself i know that that’s like the most annoying thing to happen on stage, and can be really difficult to deal with, even tho it happens ALL THE TIME with those types of fans ugh :( 

i mean its super kind of them to leave luo jie’s space empty for him, but its kinda weird to have parts of the audio missing sadly :( and also chaowen’s voice did something weird in the middle there, like its sounds weirdly weak 

wait didnt yixing tell them to close the fan? but they didnt? 

xikan’s facial expressions are perfecttt, good for him! wish they gave more screen time to shiwei during shiwei’s lines lol... but also i cant help but hear lin mo’s voice during that part LOL ugh speaking of which i miss that team dynamic namanana team a on qcyn HAHAHAH hwx being a brat and fjj running around wild and lin mo giving up on them all just laughing like idiots for hours on end while bo yuan just judges them from a corner LOL i love the beginning of the wenxuan and lin mo friendship good times :’)  

HAHAH ENYU AGAIN WITH THE REALEST COMMENTS - i agree AHHAHAH i love these kids too but there was something off about this stage 

im surprised but also not surprised by what the judges are saying 

o didnt realize sxl was supposed to be center but i guess that explains the big puffy thing on his shoulder lol.......... agree with cx tho, even without his broken fan, i think the fans made them look worse bc it just looked messy 

well idk if we’re getting all the stages today but at least jin fan’s is also getting aired! TYGER HUG FOR JIN FAN YESS

jin fan teaching them dance? yes thank you for showing us he is a good dancer. oof jin fan’s just too nice :( hes trying to avoid conflict too much that it caused conflict smh......... lol oscar trying to talk to su er hes having such struggle i feel that bro LOL hes doing really well though, tbh being relatively young, hes really trying his best and is being reasonable. 

LOL HE CALLED HIM JIN FAN GE i forgot jin fan is considered old lol..... jin fan really taking the higher road here and im glad they sat together and talked it out a bit

THE JIN FAN VOICE YESSSS hahahhaha kou cong holding the tyger sign!!

oo is that some of his bel canto-style singing coming through LOL 

AY NICE for hong weihao and oscar to put in some rap 

some of those high notes were a bit questionable at the end but okay jin fan is really claiming that vocal + dance teacher role i see.... interesting 

but agree with yixing that he doesnt need to force himself to do high notes bc his voice is so nice regardless!! yay for oscar getting recognition! im still waiting for jin fan to do a cool dance performance sigh

wasnt expecting an enyu feature BUT ILL TAKE IT 

oof huang enyu saying hes really trying to put himself out there by going for leader and the realest comment that he hasnt considered getting to debut he just wants to pass this round oof and he feels like his opportunities may be cut short bc hes getting old oof

enyu and chenxu crying watching the movie 

AW THEIR HAHA VIDEOS ARE THE CUTEST THING I LOVE THESE KIDSSS so sad that so many of them are at risk of elimination :(  im glad these vocals made their own friend group! I hope itll be a memory they carry forward. they do all have shared experiences as vocals on this show. 

this reaction to junrong’s voice

same tho :’) but actually all of their voices are so so nice like actually these 5 are all people whose voices ive really listened for on this show, but wow renyu’s voice in particular like really ugh just sounds so pure 

also enyu looks really nice in this performance but thats a side note okay moving on

i mean literally these reactions

and li hao crying while singing and so many kids in the waiting room crying while watching OOF this perf has got me emotional 

HAHAHHAHA THEIR INTROS HAHAHHA

UGH ENYU his plea just.... the way he yelled it bc it mustve taken courage and it mustve been a frustration on his mind for a while now and bc maybe he wouldve broken down if he hadnt yelled it out but im really crying now.... and its so out of character for him that you know he really really is feeling desperate and feels the need to speak out

lol wait gjm posted on weibo about him? is that why hes getting more attention lol..........

i really hope the vocals win :( 

no tygers in the next ep preview? hmmMMMMMmm okay 

well also interesting that they put the other 4 perfs with the elims...... seems sketch but at least most of my kids got to go this week ahhhhhh i feel bad for the other groups already. esp the ones with the kids who arent as popular... 

[k-odyssey]

Dramas I’ve Been Watching in April

It’s that time again when I tell you what I’ve been watching and if I liked it (without spoilers). As always it’s a long post so everything’s under the cut.

I was struggling to find the other ones so now they’re all tagged monthly posts. (I don’t know that anyone else needs to find them, but I do. It’s like the index page on my blog.)

When the Weather Is Fine (finished)

Seoul music teacher leaves the city and her unfulfilling job for the countryside, reconnects with adorable highschool classmate. They heal from the past together.

Mentioned in the last post and all other my blog. I said it was feel-good and having finished it, I stand by that. The great thing is, even when what’s happening with the leads isn’t great, there’s always another storyline to balance things out.

It looks so good. I love the fashion, which is almost exclusively thick jumpers and warm coats and gloves.

There’s two readings of the ending, one more positive than the other. But either way the finale is worth watching for Jang Woo’s little speech about happiness and mundane things.

Meow, the Secret Boy (ep18 of 24)

Cat adopted by unwilling new owner discovers he can turn into a human around her.

Started this one last month with hopes of cute romcom but it’s too weird to ship at this point. For me anyway.

It is, however, ridiculously funny. But I can’t watch more than one ep at a time due to the aforementioned weirdness. So I haven’t caught up yet.

Cute second couple, though.

Skate into Love (finished)

Star hockey player is reunited with the girl he hated in primary school at age 18, decides to take revenge.

It becomes more about how to navigate a relationship when you have an entire childhood of history and Olympic dreams. Also meddling parents and manipulative admirers.

Did I fast forward a bit? Yes. It’s 40 episodes after all, and the drama is edited to be a bit slow I think. You can easily watch it at the 1.25x speed. There’s plenty of supporting characters with their own stories, some more interesting than others. But I still found it worth watching.

I love the leads! And they actually grow, individually and as a couple. They both make mistakes and apologize and move on together.

While I’m here, let me mention that there are decent kisses!

Here’s what I wrote about the drama in the beginning.

If you don’t mind spoilers, here’s more thoughts.

Joy of Life (finished)

21st century character is sort of reborn in what looks like ancient china, with memories from his past life intact.

It’s been a long time coming, but I finished it!

By a long time coming I mean I started this drama in... December? Which might as well be a century ago at this point. I mentioned it here in January if you missed that.

46 episodes is a lot for me, especially if the drama is no longer airing. If I don’t watch it as it comes out, I 100% will end up taking up to 6 months to finish it. That’s just my brain.

The drama itself is a delight! Both funny and heartbreaking. Lots of intrigues and politics, but not in a boring way. It definitely keeps you on your toes.

Wan’er being one my faves (I don’t care if some find her plain), I was sad to see her character fade in the background as the drama progressed. The lack of romance from ep35 or so might be why it took so long for me to finish it. I love my romance ok?

Also this is season 1 of at least 2, so the ending is... an interesting and shocking one.

A Piece of Your Mind (finished)

Two people dealing with the loss of loved ones help each other through the darkness. Also there’s artificial intelligence involved.

I thought the fact that there was AI would mean the plot would inevitably end up where it usually does for this genre of kdrama: some evil person or entity trying to acquire the technology through legal or illegal means. Thankfully, that never happens. It’s not that kind of drama but a sweet melo.

Did you know I love Jung Hae In? I have that one post about him where I say exactly that but in more words and I’m always happy when it gets notes. The thing is, I don’t mind that he’s been playing similar characters lately. On an emotional level, his portrayals always work. I can’t look away from his eyes. Especially if he’s about to cry. He plays “overwhelmed with emotion” so well whether it’s anger or sadness or love. Plus, I’m all for kinder and softer male leads.

I know Chae Soo Bin from 3 other dramas and they were all comedy I think. I didn’t know she had the range! It was a good surprise to find that she could play a more poised character. I love her in this.

Is it because I’ve been re-watching One Spring Night but this drama looks so bright! In a good way. I love the light and colours. Especially at sunset. Plus all of the snow in the beginning, and Soon Ho’s plants!!! Also I love how they film through windows and play with reflections.

I’m sad they had to cut 4 episodes but they managed to wrap things up pretty well.

So many great characters. And I love that there’s several very strong non-romantic relationships. Soon Ho and Ha Won for example. As someone who wants to scream anytime I hear “men and women can’t be friends”, I love that these two are best friends. Also the boarding house scenes were great. Especially once Min Jung and the medical student moved in.

More thoughts about the AI.

Hyena (finished)

How do I describe Hyena?

It’s an unusual love-to-hate-to-love. Two resourceful, rich-people’s lawyers cross paths and well, sparks fly.

It’s not cute and fluffy. They defend the worst people and with questionable means. They have ethics but they’re different from mine.

As I have mentioned here, it was Hee Jae that grabbed my attention. Joo Ji Hoon is a brilliant actor.

The drama is fast-paced and I watched it in like a week.

Read this post I wrote at the end if you want to know more and don’t mind mild spoilers.

The King: Eternal Monarch (ep2 of 16)

King with a tragic family history finds the door to a parallel universe.

Technically I’ve watched 2 eps and like 15 min of the 3rd ep.

I’ve decided to give it at least 4 episodes. I still haven’t caught up.

Main appeal for me: Woo Do Hwan. He’s not the lead though so there’s that.

I don’t usually pay much attention to that but since I edit them for this... the posters aren’t great? And none of the ones I’ve found have the standard format so I had to choose between cutting the title and cutting off half of Lee Min Ho’s face.

Love is All (ep4 of 26)

Historical romcom. I kinda didn’t pay attention to ep1 so I’m not super clear on why the male lead is hiding his identity but he is. He’s left the capital to become a county magistrate in a small (?) town. There he meets a romance writer who becomes his adviser.

They fight all the time.

Also she keeps unknowingly declaring her love for him because she knows him by name and has a crush on him, but he’s living under a false identity. So she’s annoying him a lot but also complimenting him all the time and he’s not indifferent.

Fun supporting characters.

Is it kinda cheesy? Yes, but that’s what I typically watch cdramas for.

[sheepishlyshippingsheep]

What I love about BNHA Season 4 Ep 1

Okay I said my thoughts about the series being posted on my Tumblr would be a regular thing but the past chapters have been really making me nervous. I have several Tumblr drafts already but I couldn’t post it. HAHA. So for now, here are my thoughts for the first episode of this most anticipated season!

 Spoilers after the cut!

As a journalist irl, this one really touched me so much. Often in anime/manga or jdrama, I’ve seen media being depicted as being terrible xD only after scoops and stuff. BNHA was no exception. Even I felt so bad with the grilling that UA had before the media. Of course media culture is different for my country, but my pride with my pen was also questioned thanks to these things I’ve been watching. SO to see a bunch of journalists who love All Might but also their job? It was so good to see! (EDIT: His camera quirk too! I’m so glad it was given to him just imagine if Mineta had such quirk!! OH GOSH THE HORROR) The episode-special character was shady at first but given his past, his goal was super touching. I LOVED WHAT HE TOLD DEKU THAT HE’D WRITE “THE SYMBOL OF PEACE WHEN HE WAS YOUNG” I ALSO LOVED HOW HE SAID HE WAS SO HAPPY TO WRITE THAT THERE IS HOPE.

Because that one line got through me. Even from episode 1, I knew BNHA wouldn’t be all the fun adventure it looked like despite the comic reliefs. It had several foreshadowing of darkness that is slowly being peeled especially with the upcoming arc (a bit of a warning for anime-only watchers because darkness will really come for the next episodes). But that one line made me realize that we are watching these kids’ growth and even if Deku is All Might’s successor, these kids are all symbols of peace. These kids are all the hope that the world needs. And that is so heartwarming to realize again.

I also loved how this episode was a creative “recap.” The swimming episode seasons ago was fun, yes, and also a creative to have a recap. But this one was done (for me at least) more tastefully. Not just fun, but something that leaves a good impression.

THE DAY TO DAY LIVES OF THE CHARACTERS GOT ME. I had to pause and rewind several times. It’s just so good to see everyone in their “natural habitat.” With all the action and pressure of being a hero and all the things that make the plot turn heavier each time something happens, it’s so good to see them having fun or just being chill. They are still kids and I’m so happy to see them doing kid things.

THERE ARE SEVERAL DETAILS THAT ARE SO FUN TO LOOK AT. Hate him or don’t like him, Mineta and his usual perv ways was a thing that needed to be shown. He completes the Class A experience. Hagakure and her consciousness on her appearance is one too! Same as Aoyama’s sparkling and “looking into our souls.” Sadly we didn’t hear a dialogue from Bakugou but it’s fun to see him all angery again (and admit that the idle eating scene of him was eye candy). Sadly, no Todoroki dialogue too (right or I missed it?) but his stolen shots were cool. Tokoyami and Dark Shadow! GOSH how many times were they shown eating? HAHA. It’s so cute to see Dark Shadow serving him food <3 Kaminari charging phoneS was another great thing to watch! Koda being that cute cinnamon roll. Iida being IIDA haha. Aizawa snapping on Mineta was fun too xD The Ashido-Hagakure team-up when it comes to chats is also wonderful.

Another thing I loved about this episode is that though the profiles of each UA student, we got new scenes. it wasn’t purely just recycled scenes. We got to see more of their daily lives. Some good things to note about their characters!

If there’s one thing, I wish I saw more Kyouka? More Momo? Or more Bakusquad interaction? More Tsuyu? Meizo? But in a 20-min episode, that is understandable! I’m already happy to see the kids.

Notice that I haven’t mentioned Ochako or Izuku BECAUSE WE GOT IZUOCHA!? I MEAAAAAN. For this episode, it was mostly Izuku being flustered! That is so cute! We all know that it’s confirmed that Ochako has feelings for him but we’ve yet to get a clear one from Izuku. So you know, instead of getting Ochako being the one flustered (when she’s the one who has a crush), it’s Izuku. So my shipping heart is happy! 

That selfie shot of Izuku and the journalist though! LOL Ochako blushing like that!? I mean I know she’s confused. But LOL. I can’t. 

IZUKU WAS SO PRECIOUS IN THIS EPISODE. I COULDN’T GET ENOUGH OF HIM EVERY TIME HE WAS SHOWED. HE WAS SO CUTE.

HIS LITTLE SCENE WITH ALL MIGHT TOO WAS SO HEARTWARMING OH MY GOSH!

AND ALL MIGHT WAS SO CUTE IN THIS EPISODE! I’M SO SO HAPPY THAT THE EDITOR IN CHIEF SAID OUTLOUD THAT HE IS CUTE!

Speaking of All Might, mentioning the movie was pretty good! Makes you think that all fillers are connected. 

Izuku’s intro is also new compared to the past 3 seasons. So cute to see everyone in it but I noticed my ships sharing same scenes so maybe that;s an addition for my personal enjoyment

All in all, I love this episode! It’s a good refresher that has its own story and content! The upcoming episodes are gonna go darker so I super appreciate this gift.

I won’t specify my thoughts on the OP and ED because it would take so much time! Probably another post? IDK but both are chilling! The OP has all the elements of foreshadowing to more happenings in this arc EVEN THE SUBTLEST ONES (like Touga suddenly appearing after Ochako? That one was soooo good!) so anime-only watchers, I suggest you go absorb that opening because you’ll see lots in future episodes! The ED was just... heartbreaking. I didn’t want to make a joke but it really broke me then Mirio and Deku smiling in the end built me up.... but it’s a bad joke... if you know the story... of Eri. SO YEAH. These are my thoughts. Thanks for reading if you reach here!