#might check if its on netflix in any other country so i could pull some vpn stuff but unlikely and also id have to set a vpn back up
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my position as Tech Child is coming back to bite me as i attempt to track down a place to watch Paddington in Peru (2024) online for free. see this usually isnt an issue for me because i love going to the cinema and most of the movies i want to watch are a decade old
#couldnt find a torrent on knaben and its not on the first couple streaming sites i tried#from the looks of it its available on the sky store in ireland + in other places elsewhere so like Theoretically its gettable#but like. nobody else has gone to the bother of it#might check if its on netflix in any other country so i could pull some vpn stuff but unlikely and also id have to set a vpn back up#edit wait the sky store entry is a pre-order. who the fuck is spending 16 euro to pre-order a movie online#literally doesnt cost that much to go to the cinema
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—chapter one: the beginning of an end
this is a part of my an ode to a broken heart drabble series.
pairing: jeon jungkook/reader
genre: unrequited love, best friends to (?), heavy angst, future smut
word count: 1.4k words
summary: loving jeon jungkook is, above all, the beginning of an end.
previous || next
You’re positive your favourite sound in the whole world is the rhythmic, repetitive sound of your fingers tapping on the keyboard.
Everyone has a different approach when it comes to coping with stress and anxiety. Some people drink away their unwanted emotions, some drown themselves in work, some watch yet another, mediocre Netflix show. But your solution, your little panacea has always been writing.
You’re not the best when it comes to expressing your true feelings. You can struggle with saying ‘I love you’ to your mother and then write a long, affectionate letter for her birthday that makes her eyes turn glossy. You may stutter and tumble on your own words while trying to order coffee and then complete academic essays with ease.
Whenever you feel like you’re overwhelmed, boiled up with mixed emotions, you do exactly what your school counselor told you many years ago: you let it out. She never mentioned any specifics, simply encouraging you to find your own way. And that’s exactly what you did – you picked it up yourself. First, it was writing a diary. No less than two weeks into it, you got bored. Turns out describing in detail every single mundane day of your life was never your forté. You threw away your old notebook, bought a new one and decided to write there whenever you felt like you really wanted to, not out of obligation.
And you continue to do so, these days you opt for a use of modern technology often. You open your laptop and pour your feelings onto a digital sheet of paper. It’s cathartic, in a way. Getting rid of what you feel like is weighing you down.
Jungkook however, your dearest best friend, has always been on the other side of the spectrum. Loud, obnoxious, a life and soul of the party who happened to miraculously befriend the most quiet introvert in class. Sometimes you still wonder how your friendship has managed to survive almost twenty years. You’re two polar opposites. Fire and water. Storm and chilly breeze. A confession screamed in the middle of the night and handwritten love letter.
You’re a dichotomy. Made of the same atoms, pulling in and pulling away. And if the phrase ‘opposites attract’ held any significance, maybe you would’ve ended up together. But in your case, it’s yet another platitude. Something that seems to work out only in books and movies. Because, if that was true, he would never fell in love with a female version of him, just graced with a sprinkle of pure sweetenes Jungkook sometimes lacks.
Soojin is everything you will never be. Polite, outgoing, sociable and so likeable you hate yourself for despising her. Truthfully, there’s nothing bad you could say about her. No wonder he’s fallen head over heels for her, not you.
What’s there to love about you, if you willing chose to pin for a boy that’s so out of your league? It’s actually hilarious to even dream about him returning your feelings.
You stare at the screen with half-lidded eyes. The clock reads quarter past midnight, letters start to blur into nothingness. Yet another chapter of your miserable life is completed as you save the document and slam your laptop shut. You don’t bother to shower or take off your clothes. Sleepiness hits you right when you close your eyes.
You dream of wedding halls and never spoken love confessions.
You read once on Twitter that being an adult means checking your e-mail as a part of your morning social media routine and since then, you haven’t quite related to anything more in your life.
At the very top of your inbox there’s yet another e-mail from your Creative Writing proffesor, Kim Namjoon. He’s a very stubborn man, you decide, as you scroll through the contents of his message. He still wants you to consider what he told you a few days ago after class, it seems.
“Miss ___? Can I talk to you for a second?”
“Sure.” you replied and awkwardly walked up to his podium.
You might have been madly (and miserablely) in love with your best friend, but Kim Namjoon has never failed to make you feel like a silly teenager with a crush on her older teacher. To say Kim Namjoon was intimidating was an misunderstanding. His presence was thoroughly electrifying. You remembered a very disappointed sigh the girl sitting next you let out when she noticed a ring on his right hand. You couldn’t judge her. His wife had scored probably the finest man on this damn planet.
“I read your latest assignment and I must say, your novelette was outstanding as always. Dare I say the best among others,” Namjoon said. You bowed your head in acknowledgement, praying he wouldn’t notice your rose-colored cheeks. “Regarding that, I actually have a proposition for you.”
At that, your eyes widened. “What kind of proposition, sir?” you asked.
He picked up a sheet of paper from his desk and handed it to you. It was a flyer, you realised, and read it through quickly. VARIETÉ Publishing was organising an annual contest for young poets, which you had heard about before. Your English Literature proffesor mentioned it during her lecture a week ago. However, poetry had never been your strong suit. As much as you enjoyed reading it, you weren’t really fond of creating your own poems. So why did Kim Namjoon decide to tell you about this all of a sudden?
“I know what you might be thinking right now, but I’m not actually encouraging you to take part in this competition,” As he smiled, two dimples appeared on each side of his mouth. “Do you know anything about VARIETÉ Publishing?”
Slightly confused, you gave him a nod. “It’s one if the biggest publishing companies in the country.”
“That’s very much true,” Namjoon agreed. “VARIETÉ's vice-chairman, Lee Jongi, is actually my old friend. We used to study together here, at this university. When I chose a teaching career, he got a job in a foreign publishing company, climbed up the ladder until the very top and now he’s vice-chairman and I’m a simple college professor,” He chuckled. You were too stunned to form a coherent response let alone laugh along with him. Lee Jongi and Kim Namjoon being buddies? It was a small world, after all. “Jongi has always been very fond of young, aspiring writers. When I discover a student with huge potential, I send him their works. If he finds them interesting enough, he might even take a risk and propose a publishing deal. This doesn’t happen quite often, but I want you to know that you have a pretty big chance to impress him.”
You stared at him, wide-eyed because holy fucking shit, did he just say he can help you publish your first book?
“I don’t know what to say, sir. I’m shocked.” you responded truthfully. You had heard people complimenting your skills before but this was extraordinary. “Let me just process all of this: you know personally VARIETÉ'S vice-chairman and you want to show him my works?” Even said out loud, it still sounded surreal to you.
“Correct. But of course, I won’t do anything without your consent.” Namjoon said. “That novelette you sent me recently was amazing. I’d love to show it to Lee Jongi one day.”
The task was to incorporate a hidden, symbolic message into a story. You decided to use your favorite flowers, magnolias, and its meaning. They represent eternity, because once they bloom they will continue to bloom for a long time. In your story, a girl gave her best friend magnolia's seeds, wishing her love for him to be everlasting. A day later, she received a pack of seeds from the boy as well. She happily planted them in her garden and when they bloomed, she discovered they were yellow tulips. A symbol of love that will never be reciprocated.
“You make people feel things with your words, ___, and that’s a very rare gift,” You heard Namjoon add. “Promise me you’ll consider my proposition.”
There was thousand thoughts per hour running in your head, but you gave him a curt nod. “I’ll think about it.”
As you’re staring now at the screen, fingers hovering over the keyboard, you think about the girl whose only dream was to be loved by her best friend. Maybe it’s finally time for you to move on. Bury the past and plant a seed of new life. Because, loving Jeon Jungkook is, above all, the beginning of an end.
With shaky hands, you start writing a response to your proffesor.
#jungkook smut#btswritingcafe#ksmutclub#bangtanarmynet#bangtanhq#jungkook angst#jungkook x reader#jungkook fanfic#an ode to a broken heart
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Title: En Prise (Chapter 1)
Summary:
Hange already had the innate analysis skills and the quick wittedness to excel in the classroom. Chess should have come easy for her. As she processed her fifth loss to the man in front of her, she started to understand that there was more to the game than meets the eye.
College AU! Levi is a little too good at chess and Hange gets roped into studying the game further.
Link to cross-postings: AO3
Links to other chapters: 2
Notes: Netflix has this new show out called "Queen's Gambit" which makes chess look like I pretty good driver for a story. Attack on Titan has its fair amount of chess motifs as well and that's when I knew a Chess AU has to exist somewhere in the fandom. With that, Levihan AU came into existence.
Chapter 1
His earliest memories comprised only three sensations --- gnawing hunger, paralyzing despondency and the reprieve of the cold hard pieces at his fingertips as he maneuvered them through the board.
Over the years, his body had tuned out everything else, justifying it to his being too young to have processed it anyway.
If anyone had asked him though about the first games he had ever played with his mother, he would have been able to replay them from opening the game with a queen's pawn to the sight of his mother's hand laying the king on the ground in defeat.
It had been ten years since his mother's death, three years since his uncle's disappearance and Levi was alone. It was just him and the last memories of his uncle and his mother immortalized in a game of strategy.
Somehow, that was what made tournaments so calming to the young adult Levi.
It was his sixth game of the tournament and Levi had ended up playing on one of the boards on the corners of the large dining hall turned tournament venue. He snuck a glance at the top boards at the stage towards the center of the room before making his first move.
"The London System. Too scared of tactics eh? Typical of beginners."
Calming yet oddly stressful. Calming yet oddly depressing. Levi thought to himself as he watched the familiar play of the London System transition into an unfamiliar position.
Of course, there are billions of possibilities. There are bound to be some I've never seen in my life.
"Hey kid, your position is just weakness after weakness. Those doubled pawns on your f file, your h3 pawn. This is just a mate waiting to happen."
Within a few moves, Levi's opponent tore through his castled king with a bishop sacrifice. Seeing that the mate was inevitable, Levi put his hand out from under him in surrender.
"This was way too easy, kid. You probably could have given me a harder time if you just didn't show up at all. Do yourself a favor and find yourself some other hobby."
There were assholes in the chess community and Levi had heard that same insult towards him countless times. He grabbed his hoodie, put it back on and made his way out of the tournament hall. On the way out, he stopped in front of the list of their latest scores.
Scores as of Round 5
He scrolled towards the bottom of the sheet, knowing his name would be there.
Levi : 0
Levi was surprised to feel a knot at the pit of his stomach as he stared at the score for a few more seconds.
Losing would hurt for anyone. He thought to himself, making sense of that odd bout of emotion.
He walked away from the tournament hall and disappeared into the crowds of the subway beneath it.
En Prise
Mens Sana in Corpore Sano.
A Sound Mind in Sound Body.
Every student was required to take eight units of physical education, spread out among the first two years of college
If Hange had read the flyer before she applied to the prestigious Eldia university, she probably would have figured it out by the fine print right under the name of the university. If she had at least opened her study plan since she got it three months ago, she probably would have seen it written in clear fine print below “General Chemistry” and “Precalculus”
She had picked her university for the Chemistry degree, the prestige and nothing else. All she had to know was that it was one of the highest ranking universities in the country and they had complete facilities for biochemistry research.
She was quick to take the test, fill out the paperwork and submit it along with her essay.
Five months after she found the results, a week before the start of classes, came enlistment. As Hange stared at her study plan during her online enlistment proper, she felt completely and utterly trapped.
Her majors were no problem since they were all pre-enlisted. Her predicament came in the form of her physical education units.
Four semesters of PE. Hange grimaced. And it's gonna be counted towards my GPA? She was not athletic at all and had hoped to avoid anything physical so she could dedicate herself to her studies.
How long will I have to do this? Hange thought to herself as she scrolled through her four year study plan that opened up in the website in front of her.
Physical Education [for enlistment]
She clicked on it and watched as the choices opened up in front of her. Around the country, hundreds of other students were enlisting and she watched as the numbers of open slots fell to zero in some classes.
It's not like I wanted to take basketball or volleyball anyway. Hange thought as she sorted it by slot. Surprisingly, the ones which were running out of slots faster were the more physical ones. She had already planned to try for anything with the least exercise.
Table tennis. Fencing. Tai Chi. Yoga.
She stared at those four for a moment as she considered those alternatives if she could not find anything less strenuous. She continued to scroll down.
Street dance. Folk dance. Chess.
Her eyes fell on the last one with twenty full slots. She had played the game many times before, having been taught by her own parents growing up. She had beaten a lot of her peers as well since she had the innate analysis skills and the quick wittedness, most people her age did not have growing up. She was confident she would have it easier in that class.
For a moment, she had considered pushing it back towards a later semester. As the numbers started to fall though on all the classes, Hange knew she had to make a decision soon.
She clicked "Chess" and a few pages later, "Confirm Enlistment."
It's gonna be my first year. The important thing is I get through it.
En Prise
A few days after enlistment, Hange moved into her dormitory room with her roommate, Rico Brzenska, a petite girl with short blond hair and glasses who looked too busy to even acknowledge the new presence in the room. She looked like she was studying the first few pages of their precalculus textbook, only offering her name in response to Hange loudly and messily emptying the contents of her suitcase on the floor next to her bed.
Hange had similar plans of reading in advance. The first day of classes was three days away though and she had wanted to see the campus at least before burying herself in study material
She looked out the window to see that the sun was starting to turn a mild orange. She had arrived in her room by 4pm. It was early autumn though and Hange guessed that it might get dark sooner than she expected.
Unpacking could wait. She wanted to see the city. Hange threw aside her suitcase, pocketed her wallet and phone, and made her way outside of the dorm.
She stepped out into the green landscape just outside the entrance to the women's dormitory. The air was starting to get cold and she almost regretted not bringing a jacket. Not wanting to waste any time though, she trudged on, making her way out of campus.
A lot of new students must have moved into the dormitories already. There were many people her age already walking the streets of the university town. Hange could see some students already inside the bars that lined the busier streets.
Even since high school though, she had never seen the appeal of bars and parties. She chose to walk on without giving them a second glance.
Hange was about to circle back into campus when along the more quiet streets, she came across a small book shop.
I walked this far already, might as well check out stuff.
The familiar musty smell of books welcomed her as she opened the store shop. She had spent years cooped up in library after library, and had developed an affinity for that scent in particular.
She had bought most of her textbooks in advance. In fact, the only subject she had not prepared for at all was her Physical Education classes. She had chosen that university for their chemistry curriculum and the fact that she had to take physical education units, left her bitter and indignant about giving it the same preparation she would have naturally given it if it were any other subject.
With time though, Hange did get curious. A day before she left for college she started playing a few games of speed chess anonymously online, winning most of them. It was an easy and straightforward game. All she had to do was make sure her pieces didn't get eaten and make sure she takes the free pieces. When she accumulated enough of an advantage, she went for a mate. All the games had been like that.
As she walked through the bookstore, she crossed a games section. The books in the store piled up all the way up to the ceilings. Hange surveyed the stack of books in the game section, only to realize that at least half of them were about chess.
Was chess this complicated of a game? Hange opened one of the books only to find paragraphs worth of explanation for one board position. She pulled books out of the shelves one by one, scanning the first few pages of each book that had caught her interest.
The Sicilian Dragon
The London System
Attack with Black
Chess Puzzles
Common Chess Mistakes
Maybe it was worth studying. Hange settled for what looked to be the most similar to a text book. It was thicker than a lot of other books but was worth as much as the others which only convinced her more that it was the best bargain.
Modern Chess Openings.
Hange was sure if she just followed the path she had taken an hour ago to the bookstore, she would have ended up safe home.
If I follow the same general direction, I'd also get home anyway. With that in mind, Hange stepped out of the main street and into one of the narrower and darker alleys, her new book safe in a paper bag by her side.
Although the streets were starting to get dark as the sun started to set below the horizon her curiosity and sense of adventure remained unwavered. It was a reckless habit and Hange's parents had told her before that it could get her killed one day.
The streets she found herself in had their fair share of bars and eateries, although not as posh as those in the main street. Her own experiences had dictated to her multiple times though that the smaller ones probably even served better food than those in the main street.
She slowed her stride, gathering in the rustic view of the alleys, the souvenir kiosks and the shabbier bars.
"That shortie is fucking hustling me! He left his knight en prise on purpose. I'm not leaving until he gives me back my money!" A middle aged man burst out of one of the bars, his face pink with what could have been anger or alcohol.
He left his knight en prise… A free piece. Having spent a good hour in the bookstore going through chess books, the lingo was still fresh in her mind.
Two men were holding him from behind, looking the same shade of pink and Hange deduced then that he was probably drunk.
"We're really sorry for the trouble we're causing you here. We left the payment on our table." Another voice said from the doorway of the bar.
As Hange approached the bar, she saw another man bowing his head in apology to what looked to be the owner by the door. The two men made space for Hange to enter as they continued to discuss the logistics of what just happened. Hange knew she would get more context on that scene if she checked it out herself.
She did not need to think much to see the cause of the ruckus. Most of the bar goers were still staring in shock at one of the tables in the corner.
On the table sat a young man who looked to be her age, counting a wad of fresh bills on his hand. In front of him was a chess board, the pieces lined up so neatly, it was unbelievable to think it had anything to do with the drunk angry man who had burst out of the bar just a minute ago.
"What's that?" Hange asked no one in particular as she approached the table. The complexity of the game had caught her eye already back in the bookshop. Getting to see it in practice so soon after that got Hange red with excitement.
"Chess," the man at the table said as if the answer wasn't so blatantly obvious. "You play?"
It was an easy and straightforward game. All she had to do was make sure her pieces don't get eaten and make sure she takes the free pieces.
All she had to do was accumulate enough of an advantage to go for a mate.
He put two of his closed fists in front of her, a pawn in each of them. She picked the one on her right which opened to a white pawn. She was slated to start first.
She opened up with her king's pawn, knowing from experience that it opened up the most pieces. He mirrored her first move, pushing his king's pawn so it was right in front of hers.
She brought out her knight, then her bishop, preparing to castle kingside.
By the start of the middle game, Hange was starting to realize that the man in front of her had completely mirrored her position. A few moves in, he left a piece en prise.
Wins were usually straightforward for those with a material disadvantage. Before taking the piece, Hange looked at the man in front of her, only to see he looked completely unbothered by the free piece.
Am I missing something? It's too early in the game. There's no attack.
Oddly enough, fifteen moves later, Hänge found herself resigning having trapped her queen in the corner of the board.
She was a knight up. She should have been able to win.
"Again."
En Prise
Five games in and Hange was out of money.
"Wait. Let's play one more."
"It's late." The man stood up and counted the cash which used to be Hange's. "Besides, I'm assuming this is all you have on hand?"
Hange stood up to look at the clock behind her and it was only then did she realize she stood a good few inches taller than him. His domineering presence on the board had somehow made him look much taller to her.
She looked to the clock behind her.
9:30
Shit. Hange had lost track of time. Her dormitory had a 10pm curfew on weekdays. She grabbed her paper bag, pocketed her empty wallet and hurried out of the bar.
Hange made her way through the narrow alleys towards the general direction of the university. Those streets were much more peaceful than their wider counterparts and that gave Hange the perfect environment to reflect on how the man had played.
She taught back to the first game. He had left his night en prise at the start of the middle game, his face completely unbothered even as Hange took it. Either way, he was a material down and she knew enough of the basics to know that the win should have been straightforward from there.
Hange could not pinpoint exactly which move proved fatal on her end. The man had slowly taken over her position, advancing his territory slowly but deftly until suddenly her queen was trapped.
At first, she thought that she had been careless but as she looked back to the five games in a row. They all started with her opponent giving a notable advantage to her, whether it be a three pawns, a free knight or a rook for a knight.
Every game, she had thought she was winning. His blunders at the opening, would have made anyone think that he was a little careless or a little too overconfident. His wins came out looking like lucky breaks. Those lucky breaks though were the reason he managed to earn from the games in the first place.
In between games, if Hange had given herself time to breathe and consider the situation, she probably would have noticed the pattern. Her frustration at her own carelessness had taken over every single time.
That man was no scatterbrain. He planned everything
She thought back to the drunk man who was dragged out of the bar.
That shortie fucking hustled me! He left his knight en prise on purpose. I'm not leaving until he gives me back my money!
That same shorty just walked away with almost half of her allowance that month.
As the realization dawned on her of what just happened, Hange found it difficult to contain her anger. "That fucking asshole!" Hange screamed as she kicked the sign that welcomed her back to university grounds.The pain that quickly spidered up her foot and the ice cold wind that brushed past her only added injury to the insult of having been duped too easily.
As Hange limped back into campus, her thoughts flew back to her opponent a while ago. He had counted the money multiple times as he waited for her to move. He kept his face expressionless with every move she had played. Those images only served to further infuriate her and Hange started to scramble for an action plan.
She had to get back at him somehow.
#levihan#levihan fanfiction#levi ackerman#hange zoe#levi x hange#levi x hanji#attack on titan fic#fanfic
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Mining for Unobtanium
Chapter 29
And EIGHTY TWO followers. Bless you darlings ! and welcome to my demented little corner of Tumblr. Here you will find adulty things, so please, be 18 and over. There’s smut and BDSM and stuff like that. There is also a functional master list if you just got here and wants to start at the beginning.
As per usual, Un Beta’d we die like that goldfish in a plastic bag you got at that carnival.
I didn't know where to start the dialogue. "There's so much to all of this, love. If you can imagine it, there's a niche for it. And somebody somewhere is into it. And, it may or may not be something you're into, and that's ok. Kink shaming is not ok. Unless you're a paedophile. But those aren't your people. " "But, I think you see now that there's perhaps more to this than you realized. It can be more in depth, for lack of a better term, and it can be quite the responsibility. And if you take on someone who would require you to make all the decisions, who wasn't, pro active, or who was more bratty, misbehaving on purpose, that can get exhausting. Remind me, some day I'll tell you that story. And, does it feed your soul to be in charge, ALL the time, or did you like it when you could come to me, and let it all go, and not have to be in charge? " "And then there's your schedule, and frankly, your fame. If you go for a few months to film, are you going to take someone with you who requires that much attention, or might you need someone more..... self sufficient? If you leave them at home, are you going to have your mates check in on her? Because you won't be able to take constant calls. Or deal with deliberate disobedience for attention. That could become a liability. You love sex. Sometimes even publicly, and if that gets out......You're a great person, a genuinely nice guy. That's why there's no dirt on you, and it should stay that way. Why do you think WE don't go anywhere? Flat out, you can't be seen with me. I mean, there's no explanation. And I'm Google-able. Well, I was. Truth, dearest? You're kind of switchy, and that's the best of both worlds." Henry looked at me, then looked out the patio doors, he didn't say anything for a while. I didn't say anything either. The next words needed to be his. It was a great hulking bit of information I had tossed at him. He could take as much time as he needed. I reached across and took his hand, and rubbed my thumb over the back of his hand. Our eyes met. I held his gaze. "It's a great deal more than I anticipated. I am, however, undeterred. I can't explain how I have come to feel the way I do about what we have started, you and I. I still think you've bewitched me. For right now, I just want to feel you in my arms, and not think about anything outside of this magical bubble we have here. Is that alright? " "Of course, Henry, of course." He pulled me onto his lap and I tried not to wince. Huge arms around me, enveloped in him, it was easy to believe in that bubble. He kissed my hair and I heard him say" I love you" .What was worse was I loved him too. But this had so many flavours of bad and worse, it could have been a showstopper challenge on The Great British Baking Show..... Ready, set, Angst. I couldn't not think about all the hurdles. I mean, if you're going to be responsible for another human, then you have a duty to put them first. Everybody thinks its all whips and chains and hand grenades and butt plugs all the time, and while that's lovely, its fiction. We all have lives, and jobs, and families, and aging parents, and children, and its really tough to be all S and m when you've got a small child, or heaven forfend, a baby. They can and will exhaust one, and you'd give a kidney just for a shower. Or a nap. I know how much he wants a wife, and kids. Being in this bubble doesn't get him any closer to that dream. I can't really exist outside the bubble. There is no reason for me to be in his sphere of influence, and nothing I can be passed of as being. Not an assistant, spiritual advisor, dialogue coach, writer, producer, nothing. Sure, he has a production company, but I can't have just popped up out of nowhere, no agent, nope. That would never fly. Way too much scrutiny. Which is sad, really. I have two great shows that really should be produced. I cannot afford for anyone to make a connection between the very public life I led in the leather community and this man that I love. That can never happen. I will not be the weapon they use to eviscerate him and destroy his career. Some things, for some people, will be overlooked and downplayed. Europeans for the most part, don't really get worked up about 'sex scandals'. They're very nonplussed about it, really. Maybe its because they put pin ups in the newspapers? But his family..... That would be horrible. And the American press would have a field day, with their we love violence, but oh no not sex.... And the Superman did WHAAAAT?? OH NO, I WAS NOT GOING TO BE HIS KRYPTONITE. Henry's playing something on a game system, and I'm sort of following the plot, occasionally cheering for the monsters to bite the heroes, because monsters need love too, which gets me a look from His Lordship. I'm cheeky, and can hold my own.
" You wound me, Sir Knight. Literally. I shall be disfigured and bear the mark of The White Wolf all my days. Branded by the Witcher, why surely no other will have me now..." said with great flourish and gesture. Royal Shakespearian Hospital for Over acting indeed.
"Just as I intended. Let all of the kingdoms know that you are mine!"
" Super. And your girlfriend is going to turn me into an eel, and make a pie."
" you're safe. I don't think she can cook!"
And we dissolved into fits of laughter, Kal looking at us both as if we were mad. We played, we cooked, we made love, we fucked; and for the record, there's a difference, we read to one another, and it was glorious in the bubble. But all bubbles burst. Eventually, the phone would ring, or an email, or something. And it did. He had to go, for more work on Season two. He didn't know how long he'd be gone, and while he was still in the UK, it wasn't like he could commute. "Come with me. Its lovely, you'll get to see more of the country." "That's a delightful idea, Cavill, but you know I can't, darling boy." He actually pouted. "Oh, Henry, sweetheart, that's so difficult to resist" "Is it working? Is your resolve weakening in any way? Would it help if I said please?" " You're not playing fair at all!" "I'm well aware. I am also willing to bribe you with countless orgasms and all the sex you can possibly handle...." "On YOUR shooting schedule? That's rich! How about you promise to drag your exhausted ass back to your trailer and kiss me before you pass out?" He had the good sense to look sheepish at that one. I took his face in my hands and looked into his impossibly deep eyes. " You've worked so hard for this, and its a massive hit. Netflix is gaga over it, and they're going to want you for other things. This could mean a whole host of opportunities, and I am not going to fuck that up for you." I kissed his lips. " I love you, Henry William Dalgliesh Cavill. I love you. I don't know when that happened, but that changes things. I have an even bigger stake, a more noble purpose now. You, above all, darling boy. You. Above all." And I kissed him again.
@fishcustardandclintbarton @littlefreya @angryschnauzer @indigosaurus @tinareher @whyyoudothistomecavill
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defining colors - i | bbh
word counts: 4,100++
genre: angst, fluff
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Red.
Red was a fascinating color. Usually, it was used to describe boldness or passion. Red never failed to stand out brightly among the other colors. Wear something red, and you would be noticed. A red dress was mostly seen as something alluring and passionate and red lips was the scene-stealer. Red on the lips was never failed to make someone lose their focus temporarily. Wear red lipstick and someone’s eyes would trail down from your eyes to your lips as you talked, watching the way your lips fascinatingly.
Red was something you liked to associate with passion. Red was that one color that you always used very carefully, not wanting to lose its meaning to you by using it often.
But for once, red didn’t ooze off its correct meaning to you. The red that stained your fingers and on your hand towel caused shivers to run down your spine. It was the blood red, meaning weakness. A lump formed in your throat at the realization, your shaky hands punctuating your own weakness. Your gaze couldn’t be torn away from the blood red on your hand towel, a small part inside of you already trying to point a finger to find whose fault it was this time.
It’s you. It’s your own fault this time, that small part inside of you told yourself.
“My God.” Someone sounded exasperated enough it caught your attention. Blinking your eyes to pull yourself out from your overworked brain, you looked up and realized that it was your own friend who sounded exasperated. The frown and the turned-down lips were signs that she was irritated by the sight of blood on your hands.
You watched with curiosity brewing inside as she moved towards you, grabbing a hold of your hand—the one with a hand towel on it—and pressing the towel onto your nose. That was when you fully realized that you were having a nosebleed. Relief rushed through you at the late realization.
“Stay there.”
You stayed where you sat, leaning on the back of the chair leisurely and waited until your friend came back from the kitchen with an ice pack for you. You had a perfect view of the Han river, you realized. The couch was facing the floor-to-ceiling window and it was the exact time for the sunset. Enjoying this perfect view with a can of cold beer would be perfect.
A hand was tugging at your wrist and an ice pack was put on your nose pulled you from the trance. Gazing up, it was Sooyoung who pulled your hand back and put the ice pack on your nose. Flashing her a small, grateful smile, she sighed and sat on the far end of the couch.
“Thank you, Sooyoung,” you spoke as you kept the ice pack on your nose and examined the hand towel on your other hand. “I actually thought I messed up my hand, you know? Thank God it’s just a nosebleed.” Realizing the mood in the room had slightly gone down a little bit, you tried to let out a short laugh—even though it ended up sounding like you were strangled.
“Yeah, it’s just a nosebleed, you know? It’s only your nose, right? It’s not like you need to breathe or something.” Turning your gaze away from the scenic view to your friend, you realized that Sooyoung looked like she had a lot to say. “You do realize you’re driving yourself to an early death, don’t you?”
You sighed. You should have seen this coming, honestly. Every time you met up with Sooyoung these days, she would mention how you’re driving yourself to an early death. You knew. Gosh, you knew it yourself.
“That’s the second time this month,” you mentioned with a sigh, annoyed because it felt like your nose was clogged or something. The cold, numbing feeling on your nose also made you feel weird.
“I’m just saying, you know.” You leaned your head back at the back of the couch. “I’m the one going to the nerd school but you’re the one driving to an early death. It’s supposed to be the other way.” Grimacing at the words she said, you tried to control the bubbling annoyance within you. The nerd school. Right.
“Old habits die hard, I guess.” The words came out weak as if you had lost any battle within yourself that kept going on for so long. You knew it was not finished, though, but sometimes you felt like it was and you ended up questioning the things you did all this time.
Sooyoung didn’t say anything else, but you still could feel her eyes on you, watching your face and trying to figure out what you’re thinking. It should’ve made you squirm. It would make someone else squirm, you knew that but it was Sooyoung and you had known her for so long that her antics didn’t even surprise you anymore.
The same couldn’t be said for her, though. The memory of you and Sooyoung sitting in one of the private rooms in a high-end restaurant last year flashed in your mind. Sooyoung was already quite tipsy when she told you how even after all this time, she could never really figure you out. Your stomach twisted painfully at the memory.
“Are you meeting anyone after this or going straight home?” She asked, finally tearing her gaze away from you. At her question, you became conscious over the unread text that you got from your mother just earlier this morning.
“I’m going straight home.” For a day, you just wanted to enjoy being off the grid. Well, not completely, but it was always nice to be alone in your apartment and just not touch your phone. Besides, it wasn’t like anyone besides your mother would try to keep up with you. Both of your brothers were busy with their own things and they could just drop by your place if they needed something from you.
“Good, good. You better get some proper rest, okay? We all know you won’t be getting any of that once the new semester starts next month.” You just smiled at her words. “Let me know if you need anything, okay? I’m just a call away.” She might be a call away, but she had her schedule full with so many things. Her class schedule, her job, and her boyfriend that you had never met before.
But for her peace of mind, you nodded anyway and told her not to worry.
On your way back to the apartment, you made a stop by the supermarket. It was easier to do grocery shopping now while you were still outside and before your mood was gone. Besides, the sight of all the food in the snack aisle managed to lift up your mood, too. While it was hard to decide which snack you should buy, you welcomed the process of decision making in your head that was for once not school related. After all the whirlwind that was your summer break, this was relaxing, somehow.
You were just driving out of the parking lot when the first call came in. Kim Junmyeon. Answering the call, your older brother’s voice filled in the quietness in your car.
“You arrived home yet?” It was a regular check-up thing that he did whenever you arrived from New York. It was nice that he gave you a little bit of room and time to breathe before he called. Although you both didn’t even live in the same country anymore, you’d think he was still the only one in the family who understood you the most.
“I landed about three hours ago, and I just got back from Sooyoung’s and did some grocery shopping too,” you answered as you made a right turn. Junmyeon let out a hum at your answer. “Where are you now? The office?” You earned a laugh this time, causing you to jut lower lip out into a pout.
“Yah, it’s Saturday. Why would I be at the office?” The clogs in your brain worked, trying to make you remember what day it was. Right, so it was still Saturday at where he was.
“Oh, right…” you mumbled and let out a chuckle out of sheer embarrassment. “Uh, can you call again later?”
“Sure, sure. I’ll let you go now.” After exchanging goodbyes with him, you hung up the call, feeling perfectly content with only hearing the faint sounds of the radio in your car. The volume had turned to low because you only needed it as the background noise. As something to keep your mind stayed within the line you had previously drawn yourself. It was proven hard, though, because the scenery out there was pretty much the same to what you had been seeing in the past month. Only this was less crowded, but pretty much the same.
You’d think of how it was if you lived in the countryside. Somewhere so far from the hustle bustle of the big city. Somewhere your family wouldn’t expect you to live. It might be nice, and the thought was refreshing enough that it brought a little smile on your face. You imagined how your brothers would respond to that—how Junmyeon would whine and insult (in a brotherly way) your choice of living meanwhile Minseok would praise you and probably visit every now and then because the simple living suited him too.
It would be hilarious, living somewhere out of reach from everyone. It would be a move that no one would ever expect from you—from Minseok, probably—and it would just be funny seeing other people’s reaction to it. It would be nice, though, if you really had the guts to do it.
The guts you had only took you so far to live in the old, hand-me-down apartment from your late father—although the apartment wasn’t actually old, after some renovations here and there, of course. While you were hoping that you could take a bigger step than this, it was still enough for you (for the moment, at least). You were grateful for the impulsive decision that you made back then, even though living alone could be quite lonely to you.
The only things (and people) that could keep you company were mostly your Netflix and the two guys who were only a phone call away and liked to act as your bodyguard—they clearly weren’t, though. A ‘phone call away’ was literally meant just that because they could just come over bearing snacks (and alcohol, too, sometimes if there was a request) whenever you called them to.
“You just want us to help you clean up your place, right?” The first guy, Chanyeol, spoke up as soon as you opened up your front door and let him in your apartment. There wasn’t a spike in his words, though. It was laced with amusement as if he had expected this to happen.
“As long as you buy us food, it’s fine, though.” Sehun, who stood behind Chanyeol, popped in. You just chuckled at their words and stepped aside to let them in. The two guys were frequent guests in your apartment, so you didn’t need to wait around for them because you knew they’d follow you to the living room.
With the two of them occupied the couch in the living room, the apartment didn’t feel quite as lonely as it was before. Chanyeol and Sehun talked enough for the three of you and the music (that Chanyeol played from his playlist) that blasted softly through the Bluetooth speaker was also enough to drown your thoughts away as you cleaned.
“I’ll clean my bedroom, okay?” The guys only responded with hums and with that, you left them to their devices in the living room. You trusted them enough to help you clean and you knew they wouldn’t let you down, especially with the promise of food. Besides, it wasn’t the first time this happened too.
There was a system when it came to cleaning your room. The system consisted of you tying your hair up and wearing the loosest shirt you could ever find in your closet and playing a podcast from Spotify on speakerphone. It was a system that had worked for quite a long time.
The system, this time, was interrupted by a string of email notifications from your mother. A string of e-mail that you hadn’t even bothered to read since you left New York City two weeks ago. The amount of unread email wasn’t that many back then, and you were quite busy with the excitement of meeting up with Junmyeon and spending the last weeks of your summer break with him.
But this time as you sat on the edge of your bed with nothing to look forward too, you realized you couldn’t brush them off any longer. With a sigh, you opened up your email app and gulped at the seven unread emails from your mother.
(You also cursed to yourself at your mother’s inability to act like the usual mother who texted their kids rather than sent them freaking e-mail).
The first few emails were her usual nagging. Telling you to send her pictures from your break in LA with Junmyeon and to let her know when you landed in South Korea. You did neither of them because you knew she might have found out what you were doing in LA from Junmyeon’s posts on Instagram, so you quickly scrolled down to the others.
The recent ones, though, were the ones that you regretted opening it in the first place.
My lovely daughter,
I hope you find this email just fine.
I just want to let you know that I have found a man suited to you. He is the son of your father’s colleague and studying at Korea Univ too. Here is attached his full profile so you can get to know him. Expect a text or call from him within the week and date within this month.
Have fun on your date and good luck with your studies.
It seemed like your mother had the template ready for this kind of emails. It was because this was definitely not the first time you received similar emails from your mother. It felt like she got the template ready and only had to input different info and profile when the time came. It made you feel sick.
Annoyance and anger were the two emotions that you could feel so strongly once you read the email once more. It felt like a lump grew in your throat and you had trouble swallowing it (along with your bubbling anger) down. The feeling was familiar, for it wasn’t the first time, but it still irked you to the bone. She had pushed you too far this time and maybe it was time for you to do something—that you weren’t sure of doing back then, but this time it seemed like you had no choice.
Maybe… Maybe it was the right time to actually fight back.
+++++
The quaint cafe was quite empty as you pushed the door open, the little bell above the door ringing through the room. The young girl behind the counter looked up and smiled at you as you stepped in, her gesture telling you that she was ready to move behind the cashier machine and take your order. You just flashed her a small smile and a faint shake of the head though, and then shifted your gaze away to the man sitting by himself on the table in the corner of the room.
Your eldest brother, Minseok, stared at you as if you had grown double heads as you walked towards where he was sitting. Just like every time you met up with him, he chose the table in the corner of the room. The two paper cups and the strawberry cake in the middle of the table and the gummy smile he’s sporting made you pick up your pace.
“You’re dressed up,” he stated as he hugged you in greeting. “You’re not usually this dressed up to see me.” You couldn’t help but chuckle at his words and the teasing smile across his face. It was true, though. The both of you were never dressed up when meeting each other. So, yeah, you kind of figured he would be questioning you when you dressed up to the nines like this.
“I’m meeting someone later.” A playful smile bloomed across your face as you sat across the table from Minseok. Those words were not unfamiliar to his ears, you knew. In the previous dates, he was your rescuer when things got a bit too overwhelming and bad for you.
“Should I have my phone on standby tonight, then?” You chuckled and shook your head, taking a sip from the paper cup in front of you that you predicted to be hot cappuccino—you were right.
“I’m gonna be fine,” you tried to reassure him—and yourself too. “I’m meeting with Sooyoung and her boyfriend and their friend. So, it should be fine.” Minseok looked like he still wasn’t convinced, so you had to do more. “I’ll text you once I meet the guy and arrive home, okay? I’ll even call you when I’m on my way back. Is that enough?” Then he finally nodded.
You spent quite a bit of time with Minseok, the two of you catching up with what each other had done during the summer break. As usual and as expected of Minseok, he spent his summer break working and searching for a school to pursue his doctoral degree. He dated, on the side too. You didn’t where he had all that time and how he managed it, but you had always been so amazed by (and proud of) your eldest sibling.
Although the two of you weren’t as close in the past as you were now, you were glad that you managed to be closer with him now that you lived in Seoul. After all, it was always nice to have a familiar face around you.
“I think I’ll leave now,” you informed your brother once you glanced at the digital clock on your phone, signaling you that you only had thirty minutes before your meeting with Sooyoung and the others. Taking one last sip of your coffee, both of you stood up from your seats.
“Don’t forget to let me know about the date, okay?” Both of you shared a brief hug before he finally let you go to do your last plan for the day.
Throughout the drive to the restaurant where you’re meeting Sooyoung and the others, you couldn’t help but notice how hard your heart was beating against your chest. It beat hard and fast as if it was following a beat of a drum somewhere. It also felt like there was a loud ringing in your ears that it almost distracted you from your own plan. You couldn’t be distracted, though. In order for tonight to go smoothly, your head had to be clear and to reach that, you spent about five minutes in your parked car to take deep breaths and calm yourself. A little bit of pep talk could work like a charm, too.
Once you took one last deep breath, you made up your mind to finally get out of your car and walk into the restaurant. The sound of the heels of your shoes against the wooden floor was what you focused as you kept your head held high, a subtle hint of a smile playing loosely on your face. The restaurant was pretty crowded—it’s dinner time, anyway—but you could still spot your friend easily.
Too easily, in fact. The dark red dress Sooyoung was wearing and the red coating her lips were the ones you spotted first. The man with a white button-up shirt sitting next to her was the one you noticed next. How they acted around each other—the way Sooyoung holding the hand tightly in her hands—felt like they were wrapped in a bubble. They were so wrapped around each other and you were sure Sooyoung wouldn’t notice you at all if you didn’t clear your throat once you approached their table.
As if pulled back from a trance, Sooyoung broke her gaze from the man next to her and shifted her body and her gaze to face you. A wide smile bloomed on her face when she recognized you.
“You’re finally here!” She exclaimed in greeting, catching the attention both of the men sitting in our table. You just nodded and widened your smile, hoping that it could show her the same enthusiasm that she felt. She stood up and hugged you briefly before ushering you to sit across her.
It was a round of introduction that happened next. You were finally introduced to Kim Jongdae, the man that you knew to be dating your friend but never saw him before, despite your numerous visit to his apartment—that Sooyoung liked to stay in. From the way he dressed, you knew he was rich and you had a slight inkling that maybe, just maybe Sooyoung didn’t only date him. Some perks might or might not come with it, too.
Finally, finally, Sooyoung introduced you to the man sitting next to you. You were sure that he had his attention on his phone before, but now that Sooyoung finally introduced the both of you, he had his attention on you. Turning your head to face him, you opted to keep your smile small and polite. It was important not to show him that you were too eager to meet him. To hold the attention you had already gotten from him, you had to show him that you were delighted to be there, but not that much interested.
Although, you had to admit that it was pretty hard to do so.
Byun Baekhyun looked so much better in the flesh than it was in the picture before. If you saw him in the picture, the first thing that could possibly cross your mind would be how young and inexperienced he looked ruling his own family business. In the picture, he looked relatively small compared to the business he’s running. People would think that he was nothing but a chaebol trying to run his own family business but failing to do so.
But in real life, it seemed like he had the purpose to prove everyone wrong. His faded blond hair might prove you different, creating him a look like he was some college student, not twenty-eight years old with dozens of achievements and a sharp brain and charming smile that made him look like he was meant to be in his position, like he was meant to sit next to you and charm the hell out of you tonight.
The way Baekhyun engaged in the conversation between the four of you was nice. He even managed to crack a few jokes here and there to keep the atmosphere light around you. It was nice enough that it made you sneak a few glances in his direction when he managed to make you chuckle with his words. It was nice enough that you couldn’t wait until it was time for all of you to move to the bar. You knew you couldn’t say what you had planned to with Sooyoung and his boyfriend still here.
“So, should we move to the bar now?” You held the urge to let out a sigh in relief when Baekhyun said that. A chorus of agreement later, Baekhyun paid for the dinner bill and the four of you got up from your seats.
Letting Sooyoung and his brother walk first, you smoothed down your dress and fished out your phone from your clutch to send Minseok a message.
It’s all fine. I’m going home now.
Once the message was sent, you locked your phone and placed it back in your clutch.
“I don’t peg you to be the kind of person who lies.” You shouldn’t be surprised that he managed to see the text you just sent, but you still did. Turning your face a bit to see him, you just smiled.
“It’s my brother. He worries way too much sometimes.” Both of you walked side by side until you were all outside the restaurant. Sooyoung and Jongdae were waiting for you outside. Once they both saw you and Baekhyun, they didn’t say another word and led the way to the bar.
“I understand why he worries, though.” You raised your eyebrows at his words. “How can he not? When you’re out and about in the city, looking so beautiful like this.” A chuckle slipped out of your mouth at his words. Flattery seemed to be his way of keeping your attention on him, and you realized that this was going to be fun. There was no doubt that you could have a lot of fun with this, especially with the plans you had already made for him.
#defining colors#baekhyun fic#baekhyun fan fiction#baekhyun fluff#baekhyun angst#baekhyun x reader#baekhyun scenario#exo fic#exo fan fiction#exo fluff#exo angst#exo x reader#exo x scenario#IT'S FINALLY OUT MY GOSHH#please please let me know what you think about it!
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Weekend Away
1st Night
First attempt at weaving 33% truth, 33% faction and 33% fantasy....let me know how it works.
4 nights away with Lucie. No kids, in our beautiful secluded house overlooking the Atlantic coast….just the two of us on our annual time together to recharge and reconnect.
I picked her up from the airport and she threw her bags into the back of the car, we kissed and then we drove off into the evening. We had about a 2-hour drive in the fading light, but with the rush hour traffic dissipating and clear roads ahead it would still be light enough to go for a walk upon our arrival.
We chatted about our past week, upcoming events and just enjoyed each-others company as the scenery sped past.
It was close to 8.00 when we pulled into the driveway of our holiday home, there was till a good 90 minutes of light left. Our cleaner had done an excellent job of setting up the house. Cut flowers in all the vases, clean bedding, food supplies in the fridge and an opened bottle of Rioja and two glasses on the breakfast bar with a note “Enjoy your weekend away, Brian and I are having dinner on Sunday night, love for you to join us – no pressure”
I poured two glasses and went out to the car to collect the luggage. Throwing three bags on the bed, Lucie came up behind me and hugged me, squeezing my butt. I craned my neck back and planted a kiss on her lips.
“Let’s unpack later after our walk, I could do with stretching my legs” I said.
“Not so fast baby boy” she responded “I’m setting you some ground rules for the weekend”
She walked around to her side of the bed and opened up her biggest bag and started taking things out.
“Since this is our first weekend since you admitted your Adult Baby lifestyle to me, I think I need to make sure you’re diapered for the whole weekend” She unpacked 4 plastic lined training pants with animal and rocket prints on….”I’ve been shopping for this weekend” she said with a smile.
“From this moment on…until we leave on Tuesday morning you will be constantly in protection…I don’t want any leaks on those new trousers baby boy. So, here are the rules….
1) Whenever we are out you will be in training pants
a. You must ask me if you want to go to the toilet
b. If you need to do poopies I will come and wipe your bottom
2) If you don’t let me know you need the toilet and mess your training pants you will get a spanking when we get back here
3) As soon as we get back to the house you will lay on the bed and ask me to check your training pants. If they are wet without permission, you will turn over stick your bum in the air and ask me to spank your naughty bottom
4) When we are at home, you will always be diapered in these (she held up the baby blue plastic disposable diapers) for daytime and these (she held up the thick terry cloth fitted diapers) at night.
5) Whatever diapers I put you in you will be wearing a selection of these plastic pants and you will always be in these baby socks and these onesies, nothing else.
6) When at home, the toilet is off limits to you at all times.
7) You are not allowed to touch your diapers at any time
8) You have to tell me when you need to go number two and I will decide if you can use the big boy potty
9) You will always ask permission for food and drink; you cannot help yourself
10) You will always hold my hand when we are out together
11) If you break any of these rules or get grumpy about them or cause me to get angry your butt will be over my knee quicker than you can blink and your diapers will be around your knees and I will spank your naughty bottom pink then red.
12) Obey these rules and you will be rewarded with access to this (She lifted the hem of her summer dress to revel her panty-less mound) And I won’t have to tease you by playing with myself with this (out came one of her vibrators) whilst you lay next to me.
Finally she stopped taking things out of her bag and said “Agree”? with the gentlest of smiles that made me fall in love with her all over again. There was no humiliation in that smile….just love for me and my chosen lifestyle.
Tears formed in my eyes and rolled down my cheek. “Agreed” I replied
“Ah baby boy, don’t cry, let’s get you changed out of those big boy clothes and go for our walk”
She sat down on my side of the bed and undid my belt and in one swift moment my underwear and jeans were in a pile at my feet. She couldn’t resist stroking my cock with her warm hand and she gently took me into her mouth and brought my semi erection to full growth. She continued sucking for about 30 seconds then suddenly stopped just as soon as she started. Getting up from the bed she hoisted my loose-fitting t-shirt over my head. Apart from my socks I was totally naked. She bent over the bed and picked up the green dinosaur training pants and matching onesie. She held the pants open and told me to step in. She pulled them up over my cock and patted my bottom.
“Okay sweetie arms up” as she slipped the onesie over my head and helped my arms into the sleeves. Kneeling she snapped the poppers in the crotch. Picked up my jeans, discarded the “big boy pants” as she called them and asked me to step into my jeans.
Buckling the belt tight she asked what shirt I would like to wear. I chose the one I was already wearing, and she helped me into that too.
I was then gently pushed onto the bed and she knelt to put my shoes on.
“I can do those if you want” I asked
“Don’t be silly baby boy….if you can’t keep your big boy underwear dry, how can I expect you to be able to tie your own shoe laces” She replied and lovingly patted me on the knee.
I was in heaven…if I had know this level of joy when I first opened up to her..I would never have left it so long to confess in the first place.
“Okay sweetie, ready for our walk, oops, nearly forgot”….and she reached into her own packed bag and slipped on a pair of white cotton panties, “can’t have me walking around in a dress with no knickers now can we….that shore line breeze might give the wildlife something to scare them”
As she closed the door and we walked out into the dimming light, I automatically felt for her hand “Good boy…I think Mrs Hand is not going to visit Mr. Bottom much this weekend if you continue to follow my rules”
We only walked for about 45 minutes. Just enough light to guide us to the ocean. The earlier glass of red wine working its magic on both of us. You could barely hear the crinkle of plastic under my jeans and occasionally I got a gentle pat on my behind.
Walking back to the house, I felt a familiar urge in my bladder. Not sure on the house/outside rules I stopped.
Lucie looked at me, the clear night sky dimming to ever disappearing sun gently lit my confused face.
“What’s up baby boy”?
“I think I need to go to the potty” I replied, “Can I go”?
“Well, its only about 10 minutes until we are home, do you think you can wait”?
“I’m not sure, I don’t want to risk wetting myself first time out, certainly not without your permission”
“Ah that’s okay baby boy, you asked permission to go potty, so I wouldn’t spank you for it…but if you don’t want to wet your trainers I can help you out, you can pee in that bush over there”
“yes please” I said,
“Okay sweetie” She held my hand and walked over to the bush, she undid my jeans and pushed them to the floor, then I heard her unsnapping my crotch buttons and then the fresh evening air cooled my bottom and privates as my trainers also hit the floor. Lucie held my onesie to one side and said “go ahead baby boy, go wee-wee’s for me”
It felt weird and I struggled, maybe it was the cold, or just the new dynamic I wasn’t really sure, but I couldn’t pee.
Lucie shushed me and stroked my bottom. ”O sweetie, is my little boy all shy and doesn’t want to pee for his mama”?
”I don’t know, it won’t start, maybe it’s the cold air”
“Or maybe you’re being a bratty naughty boy who is being silly”?
“No honestly, I can’t do it, I must be the cold”
“Its okay baby…don’t worry, lets get you all snapped up and back to the house”
After dressing me up again, we continued to walk back to the house. The inside lights guided us in the gloom and within 10 minutes we were back inside. Once inside she said that she was going to shower and get ready for bed. I said I was going to put things away and set up the TV for Netflix
Halfway through setting up the new TV with our account info, I desperately felt the need to pee. The water, the red wine, the cold then warm environments all working a combined force on my bladder control,
I walked… actually trotted to where the on-suite was and tried the door. I could hear the shower on full blast, and she had turned on the Alexa and was singing her heart out to her favourite country songs. I tried the door in a last attempt at adulthood, but she had locked it. Either on purpose or by habit from having two teenage daughters bursting into our bathroom at home…
I knocked the door out of desperation as I felt a little spurt leak out into the front of my trainers. No reply. I knew she would be another 10 minutes in the bathroom, I hopped from foot to foot, and squeezed my cock through my trainers in a vain attempt to quell the urge to pee. It would only buy me a minute or two, I could break rule number 6, she wouldn’t know. She would be in the bathroom another 10 minutes at least.
I carefully walked to the bathroom, undid my jeans, unsnapped my poppers and pulled my trainers down to my knees, only just managing to control my stream as it forced its way into the bowl. The relief on my face was abject, the pain in my bladder subsiding…
I quickly pulled my trainers up, re-did my poppers and remembering rule number rule number 5, I folded my jeans up and walked out into the living area in just my onesie and socks.
I then went into the bedroom and lay down on the bed waiting for Lucie to come out of the bathroom.
After 10 minutes she appeared from a cloud of steam, my beautiful wife with her hair tied up, a thigh high sleep t-shirt barely covered her bum. She smiled at me and I smiled back.
“Glad to see my baby boy is ready for his checks, but didn’t you need to go to the toilet when you got back”?
I hesitated, for a millisecond, but I knew she picked up on my nervousness, “No, funny, but the need never came back sweetie”
“Okay, baby boy, I’m just going to our myself a glass of wine and I’ll be back in to get you ready for bed”
I heard her go into the kitchen and pour two glasses of wine. Then silence. Finally, after about two minutes she appeared at the bedroom door holding two glasses of wine and sporting a frown on her forehead
“Care to explain to me your last 15 minutes”
“Hmmm, set up the TV, put away some of the food, came in here to lay down”
“Is that it, it that your final answer?”
“Yes, honestly”
“Well then, I guess we better call Angie and say her services are not required any longer as the guest bathroom has not been cleaned, there is pee in the bowl and all over the toilet seat”
I secretly cursed my stupidity. I was in such a rush to get out, I forgot to clean up and flush. Damn it, damn it damn it..
My silence spoke volumes and I just did nothing but stare into the void
“Well, well, looks like Mrs. Hand will be paying a visit to Mr. Bottom after all, but first I want to remind you.
You broke the rule of not using the toilets, that’s 10 smacks on each cheek
You lied to me, that’s another 20 smacks on each bottom cheek
She then pushed her hand down the front of my trainers and felt the tiniest of damp patches where I let out the smallest of leaks trying to get into the bathroom
“And you wet your trainers without telling me, that’s another 20 smacks on each bottom cheek sweetie. I don’t think my hand will be able to survive 100 smacks on your bottom”, she walked around to the large bag on the floor, “good job I bought Mrs. Paddle along for the ride, you two are going to get well acquainted in the next 20 minutes”
“But, its not fair….you locked the door to the bathroom, I tried to open it and then I knocked, I didn’t want to wet my trainers on my first night”
“But…but…..but….nothing baby boy,
1) You lied to me
2) You tried to hide your naughtiness
3) You broke the no potty rule
4) You wet your trainers anyway
You would have been better to wet your trainers and confess to me….I might have been lenient with you if you had, I might have agreed with you and just cleaned you up and put you straight into your night time diapers…but…but…but… you didn’t did you?
She walked to the dresser and pulled out the stool, sat down and her night shirt lifted up over her beautiful tight thighs briefly releveling her panties
She crooked her finger at me. “Over here baby boy”
I shuffled over to her and as soon as I was within reach, she hauled me over her lap, adjusted me so my bottom was at the highest position possible
I felt her right leg come out from under me and clamp my legs into position.
“Sweetie, you broke my rules, you lied to me and you still wet yourself. You are a 4-year-old baby boy and I will not tolerate this behaviour.” At that I felt her fingers go into the waistband of my trainers and yank them down to my knees.
Without warning, or warming up, the paddle started it job, swish, splat, swish, splat, left cheek to right check, rhythmically and without pause. Every 5 seconds a fresh slap landed on alternating bottom cheeks. Within 30 spanks, I was breathing hard, it took another 30 spanks before I started crying, by the time she had counted to 90 I was sobbing and inhaling deeply between the next smack. She stopped at 90 and I hoped, against hope, she had mis-counted.
“Okay sweetie, I want you to stand in the corner and you can stand there for 10 minutes whilst I get everything ready for your bedtime, You’re going to get your final 10 in the diaper position then I can put you straight into your night time diapers and then we can snuggle in bed as its getting late”
I felt her legs release its grip on mine and I stood up, I went to rub the pain away from my bottom but she slapped my hands away…”No touching baby boy”
I waddled to the corner and faced the wall.
I could hear Lucie tinkering in the background, gently singing to herself.
After 10 minutes, I felt her hand on my bottom, “Okay baby boy, onto the bed for me please”
I turned around and there in front of me the bed had been transformed into a changing station. A large towel covered 3 quarters of the bed, baby powder, baby oil, baby wipes, on one side, plastic pants with jumping lambs on the cover and matching blue onesie on the other, and right down the centre my baby blue Velcro diaper with absorbent inner lay waiting for my bottom.
I shuffled over, the tears dry on my cheeks.
I lay down on the middle of the diaper, knees up.
Lucie then pulled my ankles gently together and lifted them up over my stomach, she grabbed a wet wipe and expertly and gently wiped my genitals and bottom, front to back, then another cooling wipe wiped over both of my cheeks and then again between them. My legs came down and a fresh wipe cleaned my stomach and my pubic area.
“There all clean baby boy” Within a flash, my ankles were together and up over my head.
“Now baby boy, I want you to count for me a we finish your spankies. Don’t mis-count or I’ll start again.
Slap, 1, Slap,2, Slap, 3, Slap 4, …….all the way up to 10.
“Well done, baby boy, you counted so well for me and took your spankies so well” She let go of my legs and opened them and I felt baby oil being worked into my groin and bottom, next a liberal sprinkling of baby powder all over my diaper area then the front was quickly pulled between my legs and the Velcro sides fastened tightly over my waist. I automatically lifted my legs as she reached for the plastic pants, she eased them up my legs and I instinctively lifted my bottom as they were pulled up.
Lucie pulled me up into a sitting position and gently pulled the matching onesie over my head, she kissed me gently as my head popped out and laughed. Helping me with the arms I was then lifted to my feet as she knelt down and snapped the three heavy duty poppers of my crotch.
“All done baby boy, I know its late, but mama wants to watch some tv, do you want snuggles with mama in bed? I can get you a bottle of warm chocolate milk if you want”
“Yes please mama, that would be nice” I rubbed my eyes and stifled a yawn. It had been a long day, I’d been at work since 5am, the long drive, the walking and the bedtime activities all taking it toll…on both of us.
I grabbed my stuffed elephant and lay down in the fresh sheets of the bed, lucie went into the kitchen
I She returned 1 couple of minutes later with a baby bottle full of warm chocolate milk.
“There you go sweetie, don’t gulp it all at once”
She lay down on the bed and I snuggled into her chest and stomach. Looking up at her, she held my bottle in place as she pushed it into my open mouth., with her other hand she flicked the TV on to a movie channel and selected our favourite Meg Ryan movie…French Kiss….I was indeed a spoiled happy baby boy.
I suckled on the bottle for five minutes whilst Lucie stroked my hair and gently patted the front of my diaper.
The last thing I heard was the opening credit music to the movie as I closed my eyes and fell into a long a deep sleep.
I’m not sure how long I had slept there but I woke up around 2am needing to pee. Lucie had fallen asleep and the duvet covers were only covering her legs. He night t-shirt had risen exposing her sexy bottom clad in silky white knickers. I reached out and started to stroke them.
“What’s up baby boy, did you wake up? were you not warm enough? I tucked you into your blankies nice and tight.”
“No, I need to go to the potty”
“Ah baby boy, thank you for telling me, but you are wearing your night-time diapers and plastic pants, you can do your wee-wees in your diaper”
I lay down next to her on the bed, the plastic pants crinkling as I did so.
“Are you sure mama”?
“Yes, of course, that’s what night-time diapers are for. No need to wake me if you need to go potty at night”
She then turned over to face me, rested her hand on the front of my diaper and said “Go ahead sweetie, mama will sort it out in the morning”
With that I relaxed my bladder muscles and let a flood of pee run into the front of my diaper.
I could feel Lucie smiling at me,
The warmth flooded the front of my diaper, Lucie popped another pacifier into my mouth, and I drifted back off to sleep with Lucie’s gentle rhythmic patting of the front of my diaper. The stresses of the world dissolving with every suck of my pacifier.
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Family Over Story: Asking Permission
HEY YOU GUYS!!! Sorry its been so long. I was watching an episode of NXT and my muse struck me like a brick! So I pumped this out. I hope you like it!. This story takes place before Kyle and Cecily get together officially.
Read on AO3
Joe and Cecily were enjoying a nice night in at Cece’s chi-town apartment. The two had live shows coming up in the Midwest so it made sense to post up in Chicago and head out early to the venue. They had been in the house all day, vegging out and catching up on the shows they had missed.
Joe had noticed his sister’s attention was on her cell phone almost every 2 minutes and he knew exactly why. Colby had brought this unusual attachment to her phone to his attention last week after the two had lunch. His younger brother brought up a plan to figure out who was texting their sister nonstop. Joe had tried to stop his younger brother from snooping but being across the country didn’t help the delivery of his threat.
Kyle O’Reilly. The Marital Artist. One fourth of the Undisputed Era. Apparently, Kyle had his eye on Cece since she walked through the doors at the PC. That information is according to dad. Hunter had mentioned someone having Cece’s undivided attention and her not knowing in the slightest. The person with the real scoop was Jon. Cece always confided in Jon about everything but when it came to boys Jon and his brothers had a pact. Any information about guys that are on their sisters radar was traded in a private three-way group chat.
Kyle and Cece had meet when she came to the PC to be a guest coach with the female trainees. The girls were learning a lot from her but Cecily was able to catch up with some old friends. One of those friends was Adam Cole. Adam and Cecily had met backstage at a ROH show and hit it off. Cece was pretty stoked when Adam came to NXT along with Kyle and Bobby. The four were regularly seen hanging out with the other talent in the PC.
Jon didn’t know how or when the relationship between Cece and Kyle changed but Renee seems to think it was the night of Halloween. The two were apart of a whole crew of wrestlers going to Horror nights to celebrate the holiday. The two split off from the group when they all wanted to go into a house that Cece wasn’t feeling. She was gonna check out the Academy of Villains show by herself but Kyle offered to go with her. When they met up with the group again, the air between the two changed.
As Cecily’s phones went off again, Joe shook his head at how fast she grabbed it. After sending a response back, Cecily turned to her brother, smile almost permanently etched on her face.
“We should probably eat some real food.” Cecily got up and walked towards the kitchen.
“That’s probably a good idea.” Joe stood and stretched, loosening muscles after sitting for so long. Joe made a move to follow Cecily but the door bell ringing stopped him.
“Could You Get That!!!” Cece hollered from the kitchen.
“Sure!” Joe yelled back. He approached the door and before opening he heard the voices of multiple men standing on the other side. Joe looked thru the peephole and the sight on the other side made him smirk. As he opened the door, he was greeted by the Undisputed Era. Joe went to welcome them in but was silenced by Roderick Strong. Joe nodded in acknowledgement of their plans and let them in. All five boys brought in their bags of luggage as quietly as they possibly could. Somehow, Cecily didn’t come over to see who was at the door. This gave the boys of the undisputed era a chance to sneak behind her and give her a surprise.
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“Joe! Who was at the door?” Cecily rummaged thru her refrigerator, looking for ingredients to make some type of food for them both. The house went quiet when Joe answered the door and Cece was a bit worried.
“I may have the things we need to make some tacos tonight if that’s what yo--- OH MY GOD!!!!!” Cecily turned away from the fridge to the sight of unexpected guests. There, in her kitchen, stood Adam, Roddy, Bobby and Kyle. The undisputed era of NXT. Cecily was so stunned, the means to make words weren’t connecting in her brain. Adam smirks at the sight of his friend absolutely speechless.
“Well boys, we’ve done the impossible! We managed to shock Cecily into speechlessness.” All the boys begin to laugh and Cecily finally regains her composure. She rushes over and wraps Adam in a huge hug.
“What are you guys doing here!!! Kyle told me you guys were headed to your next live show.” Cecily pulled the other three boys into hugs of their own, staying in Kyle’s arms longer than the others.
“We are. We just never told you the city. The live show is here the day after tomorrow. We just flew out early to surprise you.” Bobby explained.
Cecily shook her head, “Well I guess I have to order some food now cause I have five wrestlers to feed. While I order, you guys can take your bags to the other guest room. Joe, could you bring out my air mattress and just set it out in the living room.” It was like a switch flicked because suddenly Cecily was in house guest mode. Taking care of everyone and making sure everyone was comfortable. Cecily spent almost fifty dollars on tacos and side dishes for everyone to enjoy from her favorite Mexican spot. The conversation at the dinner table flowed easily. From stories about their first times hitting the mat, to favorite old PPV’s, to whose the best competitions. After dinner, the six settled down to watch The Fast and The Furious on Netflix. For Joe, it was strange how well they all got along together but then again being a wrestler gives you a strange camaraderie with anyone else who has stepped thru the ropes and taken a bump.
As the movie wrapped up, Cecily went upstairs to take a shower and change into her pajamas and the boys were left in silence. Joe could tell the other three members of UDE giving urging looks to Kyle. Joe noticed the levels of panic crossing Kyle’s face as he glanced between his brothers in arms and Joe. Joe smirked and decided the push the conversation along.
“Is there something you need to ask me?” Joe, purposely making his voice sound deeper, took a sip of his corona before setting the bottle on the table. Kyle looked spooked while his friends all tried to contain their laughter. And how could they, Their friend was entering the lions den in front of their faces. Joe stood and took a seat in the arm chair facing Kyle.
“I--Well, I w-was wondering-” Kyle started but Joe interrupted.
“Let me stop you right there, boy, cause I got questions for you.” Joe leaned back and crossed his arms. Kyle took a visible deep breath. He should have known this wasn’t gonna be easy. He was trying to date a girl with three huge older brothers, Two parents who both happen to own the business he works for, and a roster full of men ready to defend her at any time. If Kyle made one wrong move and upset Cecily, he was a goner. Kyle braced himself for the verbal lashing he was gonna receive.
“What is the best outfit you have ever seen her in?” Joe asked.
wait....what?
“Wait, That’s your question?” Kyle was officially baffled.
“Naw man, that’s not my question. Its Colby’s. During the movie I texted them and the three of us came up with three questions that will prove if you are good enough for our sister. Since they can’t be here in person, it was decided that I’ll as for them. So, Kyle, What is the best outfit you have ever seen my sister in?” Joe asked once again, waiting patiently the answer.
Kyle sat dumbfounded on the couch. He couldn’t believe that was the question Colby chose to ask. His brain automatically ran through the outfits Cecily had worn around him, the boys or her friends. His brain settled on a memory that still brings a small smile to his face.
Kyle faced Joe and spoke up, “One night, Cece showed up at an NXT taping and she was helping out her dad. I think we all know, when it comes to a show day, Cecily is showing up as comfortable as she can unlike some of the other women. She was wearing the leggings with Joker laugh printed on them, a purple sports bra and a off the shoulder sweater.” Kyle let out a little laugh as the memory replayed in his head, “It was the first time I’ve ever seen a girl and instantly stopped everything I was doing to take in how beautiful she looked.” Kyle glanced back at Joe to see his jaw clenching before taking a look at his phone. Joe sent a message out then looked at Kyle again.
“Next question, How would you react should Cecily want to leave WWE to pursue acting full time?” Joe stared at Kyle without blinking. The stare was freaking Kyle out.
Not more so than the thought of not seeing Cecily around the WWE again. He knew how important acting, singing and dancing was to Cece. It was her bread and butter. He knew all about Jon bringing her into the family business and training his sister personally to catch her up. The turn around for her training to being in ring ready was remarkable. Picturing a time where he was watching Raw and not seeing her was disconcerting.
Kyle took a deep breath before answering, “I won’t lie. I don’t want her to leave. I wanna go out to the ring, know she’s watching me and for her to know that I do the same every time she’s out there. But Cece is her own women and I know Hollywood was her first love. I guess I’ll have to get used to being on flights more often in order to see her on my days off.” Kyle nodded his head, agreeing with his answer. Joe nodded back, trying to hold off on looking impressed until the end.
Joe cracked his knuckles and spoke, “Last question, Tell me five things you know about her that I might not know about my sister.” Joe leaned forward once again putting Kyle in the spotlight. Kyle looked incredibly shaken. How could he know anything that Cecily’s own older brother didn’t know. His head told him it was time to throw in the towel but his heart told him to give the question a shot. He looked at his friends. They all shared amused looks at what was unfolding in front of them. Kyle cracked his neck before answering.
“She doesn’t drink coffee, she’s just naturally that energized in the morning. Once she’s up, she’s up for the day. She carries a fidget cube around with her because she’s always had a problem with fidgeting since she was a kid. She loves the smell of coconut but not the taste. She won’t touch anything with baked fruit.” Kyle took a pause before his last point.
Kyle had one more but he didn’t know if it should be said. Cecily told him this during one of her rare low moments, remembering the past. Kyle wrestled back and forth before finally speaking, “Sometimes, she wonders why Colby and not herself. Why wasn’t she chosen to be the bad guy. Was it because of her size or did her parents not want her around. I always try to tell her that all that happened for a reason. Without it, Dean and Damage wouldn’t have been the standard bearers on Smackdown during the brand split.” Kyle didn’t want to look up at Joe after that but he did. Kyle glanced at Joe’s eyes and saw disbelief. Joe was stunned. All was quiet for a moment as Joe took the information in.
“S-she told you that?” Joe demanded an answer without saying. Kyle nodded not wanting to make any sudden moves. Joe shook his head, typed something on his phone and stood up. He approached Kyle and the latter stood up, hoping to defend himself a little, but all that was held out to him was a hand. Kyle did a double take between the hand and Joe face before finally returning the gesture.
Joe gave a genuine smile, “You’re the only one we’ve met whose given the answers we’re looking for. Myself and my brothers can’t guarantee how our dad will react but you got our approval. Just don’t hurt my sister.” Kyle shook his head quickly.
“I would never.” Joe smiled again. He grabbed his half empty beer and walked toward the stairs, “I’m gonna head to bed. If you need anything just come get me. Cecily can’t stay awake after a shower no matter how hard she tries. See you in the morning boys.” Joe walked up the stairs leaving the UDE alone. Adam was the first to clap a hand on Kyle’s shoulder and shake him.
“Congrats you passed the big brother test! How do you feel, O’Reilly?” Adam jokingly asked.
“Man I don’t know how I’m gonna make it thru her dad. Like, if Jon and Colby were here too, I would have passed out no joke.” The other three boys laugh at Kyle’s response. The sound fading as Joe went upstairs.
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Joe went to check on his sister to see if she was sleep. Cecily was half laying under the covers and the other half completely exposed to the cold air. Joe adjusted her and tucked her in. Before leaving, Joe placed a kiss on her forehead. Joe was almost out the door when his name was called. He turned to see Cece blearily looking in his direction. Cecily was smiling at him.
“I love you tuagane*.” Joe smiled, an understanding passing thru the siblings.
“Love you too tuafafine**. Get some sleep.” Joe winked and closed the door behind him.
If the next day he noticed Kyle sitting a little closer to his sister than yesterday, well the brothers only promised to keep their mouths shut until they became official. As soon as Cece got the girlfriend title, all bets were off and may the heckling begin.
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* - Samoan for brother. Used when a female is referring to her brother
** - Samoan for sister. Used when a male is referring to his sister.
#wwe#wwe raw#wwe smackdown#the shield#dean ambrose#jon moxley#roman reigns#seth rollins#stephanie mcmahon#the shield wwe#Triple H#wwe fanfiction#WWE Fanfic#wwe fic#wwe imagine#wwe imagines#FamilyOverStory#OC
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My Year in Movies: Favorite Non-2018 Feature Films (Part 1)
I watched a LOT of movies this year. At last count, I had logged 229 features and 126 shorts; and that doesn’t count rewatches--only movies that were new to me.
I set a few challenges for myself as well this year. The first one was to watch at least one non-English language/US release per week--this exposed me to so much world cinema and some really amazing filmmakers. Anyone who avoids foreign films because “I don’t like subtitles” is really missing out, and I found myself craving these narratives from voices I don’t ordinarily get exposed to in my everyday life.
Other personal challenges: Watching as many horror movies as possible in October (with horror defined pretty loosely so I could include entries from silent era and onward, as well as some comedy cult classics that have horror/thriller elements); participating in Noirvember (in addition to attending Noir City in Chicago); crossing off some major blindspots from my list (such as Bicycle Thieves, The Producers, Lethal Weapon, A Few Good Men, Grease, Home Alone 2, Brazil, and Indiana Jones & the Temple of Doom); and trying to watch movies and short films from every decade that motion pictures have existed.
In 2019, I hope to do similar personal challenges with a focus on movies made by women, LGBTQ+, and people of color, in addition to filling in the gaps of my classical/canonical movie knowledge.
OK, so that’s enough preamble. Let’s get to the list! For this list, I’m excluding movies that were released in 2018--that’s coming but this is for movies released before that.
50. Linda Linda Linda (2005, directed by Nobuhiro Yamashita, country of origin: Japan)
High school girls recruit the Korean exchange student (Doona Bae, of Cloud Atlas and Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance) to join their rock band a few days before the school talent show. This is just a feel good film, recommended if you enjoyed the likes of Sing Street, We Are The Best!, and The Runaways. Unfortunately, it’s out of print in physical form; but last I checked someone had uploaded it to YouTube so you might want to get on that before it’s removed. You can watch the trailer here.
49. The Blue Dahlia (1946, directed by George Marshall, country of origin: US)
This film noir stars Veronica Lake and Alan Ladd, and like any good noir, it deals with dark subjects including murder, blackmail, political corruption, and PTSD. It’s been on my watchlist for a long time, and thanks to Noir City Chicago, I got to see it on the big screen at the Music Box Theatre. For small screen viewing, you can catch up with it via rental on Vudu, Amazon, iTunes... the usual suspects.
48. Siren of the Tropics (1927, directed by Mario Nalpas and Henri Etievant, country of origin: France)
My dearly departed Filmstruck had a spotlight on the films of Josephine Baker, and this was among them. I fell in love instantly with the lively, beautiful Baker, here playing a woman named Papitou who deals with some super scummy dudes but manages to be herself in the face of all that nonsense. Silent films can sometimes be tougher to engage with for modern audiences, but this one flies by and contains some unexpectedly racy sequences for the time. Its racial politics don’t meet today’s cultural standards, but considering Baker’s parents were former slaves and their daughter went on to become the first woman of color to star in a major motion picture, this is still a landmark film worthy of our consideration. She broke down many barriers and contributed a great deal to both the entertainment world and the Civil Rights movement, and this serves as a nice entry point into her career. It’s available on DVD through Kino Lorber, and hopefully one day soon it’ll pop up on another streaming service that carries on the Filmstruck legacy.
47. I Don’t Feel At Home in This World Anymore (2017, directed by Macon Blair, country of origin: US)
Here’s a film that goes to some unexpected places. I had no idea what to expect from Macon Blair, who frequently appears in the movies of Jeremy Saulnier; but in his debut feature for Netflix, he pulled out all the stops. Hilarious, violent, and intense, with memorable performances from stars Melanie Lynskey and Elijah Wood, this is a movie about getting in over your head and just going for it anyway. I don’t want to tell you about the plot because it’s best discovered through watching--just go to your nearest device and add it to your Netflix queue.
46. Song of the Sea (2014, directed by Tomm Moore, country of origin: Ireland)
Absolutely gorgeous animation from the team that previously brought us The Secret of Kells, and a touching story that combines family and mythology. I adored this one. Watch it on Netflix or rent on the usual streaming sources--for a preview, click here.
45. Yankee Doodle Dandy (1942, directed by Michael Curtiz, country of origin: US)
I always watch Independence Day on the Fourth of July; but in 2018, I decided to mix it up and cross this patriotic musical off the watchlist. I’d seen James Cagney’s gangster movies like White Heat and The Public Enemy, but seeing him sing and dance was a whole new joyous discovery. This movie is entertaining, funny, touching, and full of iconic sequences that other films would go on to borrow from. I absolutely loved it. Pretty sure I saw this on Filmstruck originally, but since that’s no longer possible you should be able to find it at your local public library or you can rent it for a couple bucks on Amazon, YouTube, iTunes, and the like.
44. The Man Who Cheated Himself (1950, directed by Felix Feist, country of origin: US)
This tightly wound noir thriller pits brother against brother against the backdrop of 1950s San Francisco. Lee Cobb plays an aging bachelor and an accomplished police detective who falls for the wrong dame. His younger brother, played by John Dall (Gun Crazy, Rope), has just joined the police force and idolizes his older brother. Trouble strikes when the dame murders her no good husband and needs help from Cobb to cover it up. Naturally, Dall gets assigned to the case and as he begins to piece together the clues, he doesn’t like where they’re leading him. The climactic sequence is one of my favorite endings to a noir film, and I’ve seen a lot of them. Watch it for free if you have Amazon Prime; otherwise, there are a few versions uploaded to YouTube of varying quality or you could wait for it to pop up on TCM.
43. Los Angeles Plays Itself (2003, directed by Thom Andersen, country of origin: US)
This documentary edits together clips from movies of every era that were filmed or set in Los Angeles, and explains through voiceover narration the significance of each location and the history of the motion pictures in LA. That’s it--very simple concept but also fascinating. I split this up over a couple nights because it’s pretty long, but if you’re a film fan or a Los Angeles native, this is well worth your time. The voiceover is kind of hilariously flat in its delivery--kind of a Steven Wright sound actually--but that sort of adds to the charm for me. Get a taste by watching the trailer, and then you can rent it on YouTube for $1.99.
42. A Simple Plan (1998, directed by Sam Raimi, country of origin: US)
It’s been almost two years since we lost Bill Paxton; I don’t know about you but I don’t think any other actor can really fill those shoes. This year I caught up with three films that showcased his talent: A Simple Plan, One False Move, and Frailty. He plays very different characters in each one but in many ways they all start off with a similar premise: Ordinary guy dreams of becoming more. What that “more” is for each character is what sets each film and performance apart, but Paxton provided a great canvas to paint these unique characters onto. He inhabited the ordinary man better than just about anyone.
In this film, which I watched during Noirvember, Paxton plays Hank, a college-educated guy working a blue collar job in a small town, trying to make a better life for himself and his family. He’d like to get away from those small town roots, but his socially awkward brother Jacob (Billy Bob Thornton) relies on him. Unfortunately, Jacob is often accompanied by the hard-drinking loose canon Lou (Brent Briscoe). When the unlikely trio discover a crashed plane in the woods containing a suitcase full of cash, they each have ideas for how to handle the situation. Of course things escalate from there, and the way the movie explores human nature and family ties set this story apart. Available for online rental on the usual platforms.
41. The Iron Giant (1999, directed by Brad Bird, country of origin: US)
Given my obsession with Vin Diesel in the early 2000s, it’s pretty shocking I never saw this movie til now--sure, he and his glorious muscles don’t appear on screen, but he does provide the voice of the title character after all. When the Iron Giant made a controversial cameo in this year’s film adaptation of Ready Player One, I decided it was time I saw the source material for myself.
This gorgeously animated fable unfolds during the Cold War era, and features an ET-inspired story arc of a young boy befriending an unlikely being that the government is looking for. If you’ve never seen it, this is definitely a must-watch. Currently available on Netflix, but rentable on other platforms too.
40. The Unsuspected (1947, directed by Michael Curtiz, country of origin: US)
I adore Claude Rains, star of this film and supporting actor in Curtiz’s more famous work, Casablanca. Here, he plays the host and narrator of a popular radio show that revolves around tales of murder--basically the Law and Order: SVU of its day. We learn early on that he sometimes draws inspiration for his broadcasts from real life criminals. When people in his own life start dropping dead, the plot thickens and he finds himself at the center of the action. A very suspenseful and well-plotted film noir, which is available from the Warner Archive collection on DVD. I got to see it at Noir City Chicago, and loved every second of it.
That’s all for this entry--stay tuned for part two of this list, posting soon!
#film noir#foreign films#favorite films#movie lists#Movie Reviews#netflix#amazon prime#streaming movies#sam raimi#brad bird#the iron giant#bill paxton#james Cagney#michael curtiz#elijah wood#macon blair#melanie lynskey#doona bae#song of the sea#animation#silent films#josephine baker#filmstruck
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Mother Nature Sucks ~ Reece Imagine
Prompt: Your writing is so good! Please could you do a Reece one where the reader is on tour with the boys and gets her period so Reece looks after her?
Like every female in the planet, you were tragically cursed with getting your period once a month. Usually it wasn’t too bad, you never really got bad cramps or migraines. Just the usual annoyances like feeling bloated and eating a lot.
Of course the one time your period is horrible for you, you aren’t home to suffer by yourself. At home, you could just lay down in bed and force your parents to bring you snacks when you needed them. You could cry in peace and watch endless hours of Project Runway and Modern Family.
No, of course, this time you were stuck on a tour bus with five boys, no tampons, in another country.
Due to your hectic work schedule, and Reece’s prepping for tour, you didn’t see much of your boyfriend over the past month and a half. This led to Reece asking you to go on tour with them.
Usually Ben was against having extra people on the tour bus, due to it being a small space. But, everyone got along great with you, you were best friends with the boys before you started dating Reece. Also, you had great fashion sense, making the boys’ lives easier by helping choose their outfits for shows and managing all of the wardrobe details. So taking you on tour with the New Hope Club boys was a win-win scenario for everyone.
“Is there anything else I’m forgetting?” You asked to Reece over FaceTime the morning you were leaving. You called him to double check that you packed everything you might need.
“Yes, love. You have everything!” Reece sighed, you’ve asked him this almost a hundred times since you started packing a week ago.
“I don’t want to forget something!” You shout, making him laugh. Reece abruptly stops laughing when he sees your serious expression.
“If you forget something we can always buy it. We are going on tour, not to Antarctica,” Reece points out, helping ease your worries. You let out a breath, smiling at the camera.
“Okay, see you soon!” You call, blowing a kiss and seeing him to do the same as you hang up. Now you just had to wait for Ben to pick you up.
“No George. You are wearing the grey pants!” You shout in the dressing room, taking George’s favorite black pants with a white stripe down the side away from him. He tugs on the pants, wanting to wear them and not listening to you. “G, you look great in these pants! Just put them on and if you really don’t like it we can figure something else out!” You attempt to remain calm.
You are only two weeks into tour, and while you are having a great time, the boys can drive you crazy sometimes. George grumbles under his breath, leaving to change. You collapse onto one of the couches, rubbing your head. You have a headache forming, not really sure why. Maybe I didn’t drink enough water today? You think back on the day, trying to figure out the cause of the throbbing in your temples.
“You okay?” Reece plops down on the couch beside you, pulling your legs across his lap. You nod, closing your eyes while you rub your temples. Reece gently runs his hands up and down your calves, massaging a little. “Headache?” he asks after a few moments of silence.
“Yeah, but I’m okay. I’ll take some aspirin in a minute,” you say and Reece nods while continuing to rub your legs. He trusts you to take care of yourself. If you really don’t feel good, you could just stay in the dressing room while they perform.
By the time the boys go out onto stage, you are feeling loads better. You stand on the side stage, singing along and recording snapchats. Reece sends you a wink, making you remember exactly why you love being on tour with him.
The boys are jumping around on adrenaline rushes after the show, making you laugh and feel hyper with them. Ben decides that since everyone is buzzing from the show, and they don’t have a show for the next two days due to traveling, that you all could go out for the night.
“You look amazing, Y/N,” Reece says, looking you up and down. You changed into something nicer to wear out as the boys packed up after the show. You blush, leaning in to peck him on the lips.
“You don’t look too bad yourself,” you smirk, kissing him a little deeper. Suddenly George clears his throat, making you separate from each other.
“Can we go?” He asks in a sassy voice. You laugh, linking your arm through Reece’s. With that, Blake, George, Tanner, Ben, Reece, and you head towards the bars.
Everyone is having a good time, managing to find a nice pub to hang out in for the evening. There is a band playing some live music, which you find yourself enjoying a lot. After a few drinks, you just sit next to Reece, enjoying a slight buzz. Reece has his arm resting on your shoulders, keeping you close to his side. He is in the middle of a debate with Blake about some television show, you aren’t really sure, you stopped paying attention a long time ago. Instead, you find yourself chatting quietly to George and giggling as you both are feeling the effects of the alcohol.
After the boys finish their drinks, they decide to head back to the bus. Reece helps you up from your chair, keeping a hand on the small of your back as you leave the pub. The whole walk back to the bus, the boys and you are singing loudly in the empty streets, happy as ever. You don’t think you’ve ever laughed so much in your life. You board the bus, making your way to the bathroom to take off your makeup and head to bed.
Reece is already in his bunk asleep when you climb in. He wraps his arms around you, spooning you from behind. And with that you fall asleep.
A couple hours later, you are woken up randomly. It is still dark on the bus, meaning everyone is asleep. Reece is breathing softly besides you, making you wonder why you were woken up. Right as you turn over to fall back asleep, you become aware of a pain in your lower stomach. Your underwear feels wet, making you throw back the blankets and quickly head towards the bathroom. You pull down your pants and see the dreaded red in your underwear. You totally forgot that your period was supposed to come soon. It just decided to pop in early.
You groan, leaving the bathroom to get a tampon from your bag and a new set of pajamas. You grab new clothes, digging through your bag to find where you put your tampons. Except, you can’t seem to find him. You frantically check your bag again, pulling things out of it. No no no no, there’s no way I forgot to pack some! I had to have some in here! You panic in your head, feeling your stomach cramp as a reminder of what is happening. You searched your whole bag, even your purse, and you can’t find a single feminine hygiene product anywhere. And its not like anyone on the bus has some, since they are all boys.
You feel tears come to your eyes, damn hormones, at the thought of what you have to do. You are going to have to ask someone to go get some for you. In the middle of a foreign country, at night. You shuffle back towards Reece’s bunk, opening the curtain.
“Reece, Reecey...” You whisper, shaking his shoulder. He doesn’t wake up, making you feel worse and more embarrassed. You shake his shoulder harder, feeling more tears in your eyes. “Reecey!” you whisper shout.
“What Y/N?” He groans, turning towards you. He blinks his eyes open, sitting up quickly when he sees your tear-filled eyes. “What’s wrong?” he asks quickly, cupping your cheeks.
“I-I got my period and I don’t have any tampons...” You admit softly, wiping your eyes.
“Oh! Okay, you lay down and relax. I’ll go get Ben and we can go get some for you!” Reece says, pecking your forehead as he climbs out of the bunk. He helps you climb into it, pulling the sheets over your body. “Be right back,” Reece promises as he closes the curtain.
You lay in the bed, trying to relax as you feel cramps start. You bit your lip to hold back a whimper, never having cramps this bad usually. Suddenly the curtain is pulled back, revealing an out of breath Reece.
“I’m sorry it took so long, I wasn’t sure which kind to get, so I got a bunch!” He admits sheepishly. You feel your heart melt for your adorably sweet boyfriend.
“Thank you,” you say softly, kissing him on the lips and grabbing the bag from his hand. You take care of your business in the bathroom, feeling much better. But harsh cramps cause you to stay hunched over slightly.
You exit the bathroom to see Reece in his bunk again, with a fluffy blanket and his laptop showing the Netflix home screen. You shuffle to him, clumsily climbing in and laying in between his legs. He’s sitting up slightly, so his front is pressed right against your back. Reece tucks the fluffy blanket around you, making sure to cover you completely.
“Is there anything I can do to help, love?” Reece asks, feeling you tensed up in pain from the cramps.
“Can you rub my stomach, please?” You ask, clenching your eyes shut as an extremely painful round of cramps hits. Reece slips his hands underneath the blanket and your shirt, rubbing soothing circles into your lower stomach. His fingers apply some pressure, not enough to hurt you but just enough to cause the muscles to relax a little. You let out a sigh of relief, letting your body go limp.
“Better?” He asks, pressing a kiss to the soft spot behind your ear. You nod, turning your head to catch his lips in a kiss. You slide your lips against his languidly, as a ‘thank you’.
For the next week, Reece waits on your hand and foot, helping you with everything. And while the boys teased him about it, he didn’t seem to mind. Reece would just kiss you, glad that he could help you feel better.
So getting your period on a tour bus with four boys and your amazing boyfriend wasn’t the worst thing in the entire world!
That ending was so cheesy omg!! Hopefully you like it!!
Thanks for requesting xx
#new hope club#new hope club imagines#new hope reece#reece bibby imagine#reece bibby#George Smith#Blake Richardson#nhc imagines#imagines#new hope club one shots#one shots#prompt#request
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Unison Chapter 2 - I'm a Midnight Talker
Once again, comments, questions suggestions, whatever, are always welcomed! I love your feedback!
I would link the first chapter, but do everything through mobile because internet is expensive out in the country
I can't believe I'm sitting at a diner with Ed Sheeran at 2 in the morning. If you would have told me this 36 hours ago I would have laughed in your face. Is my life descending into utter chaos?
Bridget had stayed over for a couple hours before she headed home. I continuously messaged Ed through the entirety of her stay. Every time she heard the phone ping, there would be a small smile that crossed her face. I could tell she was curious about the conversation but didn't ask a second time what we were talking about. How I had managed to keep the smile from my face when he had brought up a date was a shocker. Maybe I didn't, maybe I'm not as sneaky as I thought and she was just waiting for me to tell her.
After she left, I glanced over to my bathroom. I had snunk a quick peak earlier and it wasn’t the horror show that I had pictured in my mind. All of it was contained to my bathtub. By the looks of it I had tried to rinse it out. I had to give props to my drunken self. At least she was somewhat considerate.
As I began scrubbing out the tub, my mind wandered to the conversation I had been having with Ed. We hadn't set an exact time for our date, deciding to play it by ear. My idea. No matter how strongly he insisted that it was the hangover cure, I knew I wouldn't be able to keep it down and by the looks of my tub, I'd horked my guts out enough for one day. The thought of it sent shivers of anticipation down my spine. Something I thought I wouldn't be feeling for a long time. He seemed fine with me setting the time and place, which worked perfectly for me. I loved having everything scheduled, knowing what was coming up when. I was a master of the white board calender, everything written out in advance. Everything in order.
We both had swapped some of our wildest drunken stories. Mine being how we broke into the campus, via a window, to use one of the bigger lecture halls to watch movies, unknowingly tripping a silent alarm that alerted the campus police. Somehow we had all managed to sneak out without getting caught and ended up drinking on some abandoned train cars instead. His being how him and his mates had gotten beyond wasted, went swimming in some random pond and had stolen someone's birthday cake and pig. Apparently it was a chocolate cake with bits of reese's throughout and it was one of the best damn cakes he had ever had. After having a good laugh at our own expense, he changed the subject.
"So how are you spending your afternoon?"
"Cleaning up this crime scene of a bathroom then a shower. Most definitely a shower."
"What happened to 'Only pussies puke?'"
I groan, kneading my forehead with my fingertips. Yep, that was said. It used to be our groups' motto everytime we'd go out and get hammered. It was a rule among us, if you puked while drinking you were the one that bought the first round the next time out. Still, it didn't make it any less cringeworthy. With them it was a tradition, with Ed, it was probably just cocky sounding.
"Guess I'm a pussy then."
"Well, the first step is admittance."
"I'm pretty sure its acceptance there bud."
"What's the difference?"
I shake my head, not knowing if he was being serious or not. Instead I decide to ask what he was doing. After I scrubbed every inch of my tub clean I took a moment to scour the room for my contacts. While I was highly impressed that I even remembered to take them out, I was less impressed about where I could have put them. After looking throughout my entire apartment, I decide to call it quits.
Guess I'll be wearing my glasses until I can get in to get new ones.
I check my phone before I get in the shower.
"Simpsons marathon. I'm trying to watch all of them in a week."
"You DO know that's impossible right? With over five hundred episodes and each episode being about 22 minutes. You can roughly fit 3 in a little over an hour. All together would be about 183 hours, which is a little over a week. Without sleeping."
I set my phone down and after a long shower I start to feel like myself again. I wrap my hair up in my towel before brushing my teeth. I definitely looked like hell. My eyes weren't the honey color they usually were, but more of a muddy color. Fitting. It felt like I was wading through a bunch of it. I had always been fair skinned, I spent all of high school being called Wednesday Addams. so the circles that had shown up under my eyes really stood out. As did the light splattering of freckles. They'd lighten up to almost vanishing once winter hit and I wasn't outside nearly as much. The ones on my shoulders and arms were the only ones that stayed the same year round. I traced the long jagged scar that ran from my left eyebrow to my jawbone, curving toward my ear in a elongated crescent shape. I hated that scar. A constant reminder of things I’d like to forget. At least I could cover a majority of it. The only part I couldn’t was the part that cut through my eyebrow, leaving it bare. I drop my hand and pull my hair down before exiting the bathroom.
I flop down on my couch, pull up netflix and start browsing for something to watch. It's a shame The Simpsons aren't on here because I kind of want to watch it now. I settled on Dexter instead, getting comfortable under a nearby blanket. Once I get situated hoe I want, I pull up Ed's message.
"Thanks for killing my dreams with logic."
"I'm sorry. Better to find out now than later though."
I turn my attention to my tv, watching the opening credits. Oh, steak and eggs, that looks good...I'm kinda hungry. I'll make something quick to eat after this episode. Being snug and warm under my blanket, paired with having a late night with poor sleep I was out before the episode had even properly started.
I woke up to a dark apartment. Confused and groggy, I feel for my phone, rescuing it from between the couch cushions and searing my eyes all in an attempt to figure out what time it was. 1 A.M. I sat down at 4 in the afternoon. Goodbye normal sleep schedule. I had already missed my morning run and my Saturday trip to the market. Guess I'll go shopping tomorrow instead, but that left me with next to nothing to have for dinner. I could go fetch some takeout I suppose. I notice the notification that Ed had messaged while I was lying in a puddle of my own drool.
"What, that you're gonna shit all on my dreams? Gonna make sharing real hard in the future. How am I gonna feel comfortable telling you about my dream of having my very own nacho bar and chocolate fountain when you'll just squash it with your dirty logic"
I felt my heart sink when I read the first part of the message thinking I had, in some way, offended him. It wasn't until the latter part of the message did I realise he had been pulling my leg. I laughed out of relief. He was going to keep me on my toes, I can see it now. There's never going to be a dull moment with him in my life.
"Oh you shit I thought you were actually angry! Not the important or feasible ones but I'll keep my 'dirty logic' to myself next time. And you can sign me right up for the nacho bar and chocolate fountain. That's something I can get behind."
I stand up and stretch, trying to work the kinks out of my back and neck before wandering into my kitchen. My toast had long since wore off and my upset stomach was in the distant past. As I rummage around for something quick to make, I hear my phone ping. Surely he's still not up. Sure enough.
"Why are you up at this hour?"
"I could ask you the same thing y'know"
"Got hungry. So I'm gonna go get some breakfast."
My stomach growled at the thought of breakfast, especially at the thought of chocolate chip waffles. He just had to say chocolate fountain.
"Care for some company? Breakfast sounds pretty good."
I bit my bottom lip, staring at the message for a minute or so. I could hear Bridget's comment A girl can ask a guy out you know! I didn't want to butt in where I wasn't welcomed. He may want some alone time or could already be eating with other friends. I also just met him, asking to meet up the next night might come off as desperate or clingy, which is something I really didn't want. I never stress about this kind of stuff. After everything that had happened with Mike, I slammed the door to anything even resembling a relationship. Yet, this felt different, he felt different. I couldn't explain it. I hit send and held my breath. I resisted the urge to throw my phone as far away from me as possible, vowing to never again text a single soul. When I hear that tell tale ping, I almost didn't want to look at it.
"On one condition. You have to come in whatever it is you're wearing right now."
I look down at what I was wearing to see just how embarassed I was going to be. When I had gotten ready for my shower I grabbed whatever I could get my hands on. I snorted when I saw I was wearing my black tshirt with a highly faded Scar and Hyenas from the Lion King that said I'm surrounded by idiots and grey leggings I use mostly for running. Could be worse I suppose. The shirt was in decent shape at least. Maybe he'll get a laugh outta the irony. "You strike hard bargain. Alright, what diner?"
He sends me the address and I recognise the place. It's not too far, maybe ten minutes by a cab. I grab my sneakers and throw my now dry, but dried in a weird bed head way, hair up in a sloppy bun. I put my jacket on, checking to make sure I have my wallet and messaged him that I was headed his way now. I flag down a cab and hop in, giving the driver the address. My leg never stopped bouncing the entire time. I practically flew out of the backseat, only stopping to give the cabbie his cash.
The drunk crowd wasn't due in for another hour, so a majority of the blue booths were empty. There was a few people seated at the counter and one very haggard looking family, probably stopping for a quick bite to eat before heading back out on the road. I spotted Ed two tables away in the corner, closest to the windows. He hadn't seen me come in so I pause before heading over to him in an attempt to collect my thoughts. He was staring out the window, lost in thought. His head resting on one of his hands, the other was wrapped around a mug on the table. He was wearing a plain heather colored tshirt that made the ink on his arms stand out. The whole scene looked so perfect that I slipped my phone out of my pocket and took a quick picture. Not for anyone elses eyes but my own.
He noticed me as I started walking over to him and he quickly stood up. He was wearing blue and white flannel pajama pants with black and red sneakers. So that's why he told me to come as I am. He looked me up and down and let out a laugh. Those haunting eyes gleaming. I braced myself for the worst but was surprised when a giant smile came across his face.
"Well look at you, participating in my pancake pajama party!" Do I hug him? That seems too familiar. Do I shake his hand? No, that's to formal. I have to do something. God, he looks good, even in pajama's. Wait, shit, what did he say? Did he say pancake pajamas? Oh, pajama party. That's probably it. What's pancake pajamas? Is that pajamas with pancakes on them or pajamas you wear specfically for eating pancakes? Dammit Adi stay focused!
"Well that was the price of admission. Who am I to argue? Plus I had absolutely no food in my apartment since I slept through shopping day."
He motioned for me to sit down, so slid into my side of the booth taking off my jacket and placing it beside me. I noticed a blue hoodie laying on his bench seat. Well, at least he matches I suppose. He sat down across from me, staring intently at my face.
"I didn't know you wore glasses."
I reached up and touched the side of them, almost like I was making sure they were still there. Of course they are, they just didn't vaporize because he mentioned them, but I guess your social skills did. I played it off as I was adjusting them, partly wondering if that's what he really wanted to comment on.
"I usually wear contacts but I've seemed to misplace them in my drunken...ness."
He shuttered. "The thought of sticking something in my eye is just- I'd rather go without seeing for a bit.."
"You go without your glasses alot?"
"Only when I perform. Or I misplace them. Tend to do that quite often."
I sat there for a moment, toying with the sleeve of my jacket. I could feel his eyes boring into me, patiently waiting, not trying to coax me into talking, just waiting for me to speak on my own. Finally I find my voice (and my courage) asking the one question that had been plaguing me the entire day and the one that I was the most afraid to have answer to.
"Can I ask you something?"
The corners of his mouth turned upwards, his eyes softened. It looked like he felt slightly guilty about me being noticably worried about his response. "Of course." His voice was soft and gentle.
I take a deep breath. "Why'd you text me? Not that I'm not grateful, I am, I really am. It's just, you've probably got so many girl's giving you their number, why'd you choose me?"
It had all came out in a rambling rush. I could feel my face flushing at the hurried mess that had came out of mouth. Way to play it cool. I expected him to look angry or even offended but he laughed, throwing me for a loop.
"I'm sorry, I was bracing myself for the worst by the look on your face. You're right, I've had literally hundreds of girls give me their number. And I've never contacted a single one. Never even bothered saving their number. Know why?" I shake my head, starting to worry about what sort of things I could have possibly done to catch his attention when others had failed. "They gave their number to Ed Sheeran, singer songerwriter. You gave it to Ed, some ginger bloke you met at a bar."
I stare at him in amazement as he takes a sip of his drink. He made a weird face muttering something about proper tea it before putting it aside. He interlaced his fingers together, once again turning all his attention to me. That gaze, it was like I was the only thing that mattered in that moment. It was almost overwhelming. I realised that my mouth had been slightly open, so I closed it in a hurry. I hadn't realised it had been that obvious.
"How long did it take you to realise I had no clue who you were?"
"I knew when you introduced yourself. There was no spark of recognition when I said my name was Ed." He bit his bottom lip, I could tell he was wanting to add something. I must have had the same look of uncertainity on my face just moments ago. I shouldn't be surprised that he'd have questions that he wasn't sure he wanted answered. "Is this going to change things now that you know who I am?"
I knew this question would be coming at some point, most likely sooner rather than later and I had given it alot of thought while I was on my hands and knees cleaning my bathroom. I loved order, being in control of my own life. He's got an erratic schedule and I wasn't sure how I was going to feel with the spontaneity that came along with that. On the other hand, something needed to change. I wasn't about to throw in the towel before I had even tried. Or before there's even a 'thing' to try.
"No. Well, it will affect some things. I'm not going to lie, there was some freaking out. That's expected I suppose, but it's not a deal breaker if that's what you're wondering. I mean this in the nicest possible way, I couldn't care less about how much you're worth. Hell, I still wouldn't know if it wasn't for my friend Bridget mentioning one of her friends had seen you in town." Relief had flooded over his face. He had leaned back, tilting his head back to look at the ceiling, exhaling as he did so. I could feel all the tension that had filled the booth vanish as quickly as it came. I hadn't noticed his hands were in fists as he was waiting for my response until he relaxed them.
"Well, that's a big weight off my chest. I bet your friend really freaked when you told her."
"I didn't, actually. She was at the bar and did see you, but not your face. She thinks you're some blonde dude named Ed and I didn't correct her."
He seemed surprised at my answer, His eyebrows coming up, lost under the ginger curls that hung down his forehead. He also seemed thrown when I said she thought he was blonde. There was still an odd expression on his face, almost a mix between humor and curiousity.
"You're a very special person. I guess you weren't lying when you said it didn't make a difference." There's that cute lopsided grin again. He seemed to perk up quickly, eyes gleaming again. "But this leaves me at a huge disadvantage here. You know everything about me, but I don't know anything about you." His hand came up, rubbing his chin in thought. "Well, besides you're named after your grandmother, you were supposed to be a boy and you're not above doing some fairly dirty dancing around a cue stick as a distraction" He counted each fact off with his fingers, grinning at the last one.
I groaned, burying my face in my hands. "Yeah, that sounds about right. I'm competitive under normal situations, but add alcohol to it and I can resort to some pretty over the top methods to win. Did it at least work?"
"I was planning on sight seeing today, hit up a couple shops and spent all of it in bed. You tell me."
I laughed. At least it wasn't wasted. The waitress chose then to show up looking like we had personally offended her with our presence and laughter. She simply dropped some menus down on the table and asked, quite flatly, what I wanted to drink. After I gave my drink order Ed asked for a glass of water and it was like he had asked for it from God's personal pool. After she walked away, he looked at me, his mouth pulled downwards, his eyes widened slightly, flicking towards her in a 'Oh boy' type of way. I snorted, quickly stifiling my laughter behind my hand. He smirked as I flicked the menu open, pretending to focus really hard on what was printed, while still trying not to laugh. She came back with my coffee and Ed's water with the same gusto she had when bringing the menus. She quickly took our orders and left.
"So, you were going to help fill in some blanks?"
I nod, "Right, well you're really not at a disadvantage. I only pulled your picture up to see if you were really, well, you. I wanted to find out things the old fashioned way. But, I'll tell you my whole life story, if you answer one more question."
"Is it 'what were you doing at a metal show?'"
"What we're you doing at a metal show?"
"I wanted a night out, without having to deal with a bunch of fans. Who gives no fucks about Ed Sheeran? Metal heads. Where's the last place you'd expect Ed Sheeran? At a metal show. I got to have an great night without having to deal with a flock of people asking things from me. Plus I met you, I call that a win."
He was right. Metal heads definitely couldn't care less. You tell a metal head you like Ed Sheeran, they'll look at you, kinda tilt their head to the side and go 'aww, that's so cute'
"Well, a deal's a deal. Whadya wanna know?"
"Whatever you're comfortable with telling."
I take a sip of my coffee. Whatever I'm comfortable with telling huh? Interesting wording, alright then.
"Well, lets start off with the basics. I'm 25, orginally from Dublin, Ohio. I moved out here when I turned eighteen and got a nice office job where I do a bunch of boring ass stuff that's completely meaningless. I've got an older brother and my parents are divorced. I'll let you decide what to focus on from there"
"Let's go with family. You've an older brother? How's your guy's relationship, typical sibling one?"
"His name's Nate, he's 28 and stayed back in Dublin to work at our dad's office. We're close now, but when we were younger there was definitely a sibling rivarly that went on."
"Was some of that anger from the fact that he got things from the souvenir shops and you didn't?"
Out of all the ways he could have worded he had a normal name and you drew the short stick, he chose that. That earned him yet another laugh. I wonderd if he was tired of hearing it. Or worse, that I was just laughing because I found him attractive.
"Nah, it was more of a resentment due to the fact he was dad's favorite. When I was little I thought Nate was stealing all the attention and there wasn't any left over for me. It was when I was older and realised that they just had more in common and if Dad really wanted to spend time with me, he would. Laying the blame on Nate wasn't fair because he wasn't the problem. That's when our relationship grew out of the petty fighting bullshit. Now we talk at least once a week and visit each other twice a year, outside of holidays."
"Your parents divorced? Did he go with your dad, you stay with your mum? Have two Christmases, that sort of thing?"
I shake my head "They didn't separate until I turned 18 and moved out here. You could tell when we were younger that they were in a 'stay together for the kids' type of marriage. They waited until we were out of the house so it wouldn't affect our childhood. The spilt was pretty amicable and they're still on pretty good terms. We all still get together during the holidays and everything. They just fell out of love and drifted apart."
Is that what I have to look forward to? I don't know what's worse, losing interest in a person that loves you or having the person you love tell you they just don't care about you anymore.
I hadn't realised I had drifted off into my own little world and missed what Ed had said until I felt his hand touch mine. light, like he was worried that he was going to startle me. His eyebrows were furrowed in a look of concern.
"You alright? You kinda had this weird look come over your face."
I took a deep breath and forced myself to smile. I felt a rush of guilt come over me at the look on his face. Don't go there Adi, not tonight.
"Yeah, I'm okay, just got wrapped up in my thoughts is all. Sorry, what did you say?"
I could tell he wasn't buying what I was selling, "Are you sure? If I did something to upset-'
I cut him off. "No, you've done nothing, honestly." I added when he still looked unconvinced. "I promise." I held the pinky finger of my free hand out and he gave me a amused look before locking his own pinky in with mine.
He gave my other hand a squeeze and I must admit, it felt nice. That simple act really meant alot. He didn't let go of my hand, his thumb rubbing gentle circles on the back of it. I felt myself relaxing, focusing on the soothing repetitive motion.
"So, what do you're parents do for a living? You said your dad had an office, what about your mum?"
I welcomed the subtle subject change. "She's a teacher, first grade. I alway kind of felt bad because Dad was always caught up in his work so she had to deal with fighting kids at school, come home and have to play peacemaker between me and Nate. She has the patience of a saint, my mom has"
"Sounds like you admire her a great deal."
"I do, I wish I had half the strength she does."
Whatever he was about to say was cut off by the waitress coming with our order. It was only then did he release my hand. She placed my plate of chocolate chip waffles in front of me and Ed's plates of pancakes, scrambled eggs, a couple sausage patties and toast. We thanked her and got a half hearted nod in reply. I poured a generous amount of syrup on my waffles. Ed picked up one of the sausage patties with his fork, studying it closely before putting it back down, muttering "I'll never understand your sausage. Americans are weird." I watch in a mortified fascination as he poured an excessive amount of ketchup on his eggs and sausage. Enough to warrent the joke 'would you like some eggs to go with your ketchup’ but I kept it to myself. He probably heard that enough.
The conversation died down slightly as we ate our food. Ed had suggested we share, that way we could try each other's meal. I had a sneaking suspicion that he just really wanted to try my waffles. He offered up a bite of his pancakes off his fork. Instead of taking the fork, I lean forward and take the bite. He smiled, sliding the fork out of my mouth, watching my reaction as I chewed. I savored the sweet taste. Light, fluffy, with a hint of butter. I held out a fork full of waffle, that just happened to be loaded with chocolate. His bite seemed to go in slow motion once his lips hit that fork. Slowly dragging the food off, his tonuge gliding over them, licking the syrup chocolate mixture off. His eyes closed, a look of bliss coming over his face. I don't think he could have made that any hotter if he had tried.
As we ate, Ed told me some about his life back home. How him and his brother left home at practically the same time and the struggles he faced as a sixteen year old trying to make it in the music world. We had kept chatting long after the food was gone. I hadn't realised how long we had been sitting there until a large crowd of drunken guys came stumbling in choosing to sit a booth away. One of them kept glancing our way and you could see the gears turning as he was trying to figure out why Ed looked so familar. Ed must have noticed because he leaned forward on the table, using me and the back of the booth to shield him from view.
"You want to get out of here"? It's starting to get a bit rowdy."
He wasn't lying. The group had be causing a bit of a ruckus, practically screaming at each other, spilling their drinks on the table, floor and each other. The guy that kept looking at our booth nudged the guy beside him, pointing to our booth. Now they were both looking our direction. It was only a matter of time before they figured it out and we had the entire diner at our table asking for pictures and autographs.
"I agree, let's leave before the next wave comes in. It's gonna fill up fast."
No sooner than when he went up to go pay, another group came in. I was standing by the door so our table could be cleaned and be used for the next group. While I waited one of the guys that had just came in wandered over. He leaned against the wall, uncomfortably close, leering down at me.
"What's a hottie like you doing in a place like this?"
I could tell he was drunk but not as drunk as his companions. He was pretty average looking, tall, thin, black hair that was held back with hair gel, his brown eyes fighting to stay focused on me, a hint of lust hidden behind the alcohol cloud. The smell of booze radiating from him. When I turned to look up him, I saw his eyes go straight to the left side of my face, his eyes widened and an Oh...popped out of his mouth.
Typical reaction. I had a retort on on the tip of my tongue, ready to shoot back at him but was cut off before I could get it out.
"Is there a problem, love?"
I felt Ed's arm come around my waist, pulling me closer to him in a protective sort of way. I wrap mine around his waist in return. He was calm, but I could detect a hint of anger in his voice. I could feel how tense he was, his grip tightening on my hip. Is he jealous? Or is he just over protective? Maybe he senses something about the guy that I don't. I start rubbing small circles on his back in hopes it would calm him. It was almost like he was on guard. The guy looked him over, like he was sizing him up. The moment seemed to drag on for an eternity.
"Nah man, we were just talking." The guy looked Ed up and down. His eyes squinting as he stared at his face. "You look familiar, do I know you?"
Ed brushed it off, his voice still a little heated. His grip still not loosening. I noticed he was angling himself so that he was between me and the guy. "I get that alot, I’ve just got one of those faces." The guy had been loud enough that the entire diner's eyes were on us. Great, Exactly what he had been trying to avoid. Ed opened the door, gently guiding me out of it. The last thing I heard was "Hey, wait you’re -" The door shut before the guy could finish his sentence. I did however see the waitress's stunned face through the glass, her mouth open slightly. I smirked, kind of glad she hadn't recognised him. By the look on Ed's face he was glad as well, but he still had a dark expression.
"That guy was nothing but bad news. I hope you don't think I did what I did because I thought you couldn't handle your own."
"I didn't. Hey, don't let that drunken douche ruin our night."
He seemed to relax at that. He finally dropped the gloomy expression and let a small smile break through.
"You're absolutely right. Well, what do you want to do now?"
I pondered for a minute, thinking of what we could do so early in the morning. Finally it clicked. He did say he was supposed to spend the day sight seeing. What's stopping us now? We could still go visit the parks and square. It's not like they close.
"Well, you said you wanted to go sight seeing right?"
He must have thought I was joking. When he saw my face he realised I was being serious, he scoffed "What, right now?"
I shrugged "Why not? It's a nice night, the sky's clear, it's not overly cold and there's not a flock of people around. So you really get to enjoy yourself."
He looked at me in a what am I getting myself into sort of way before shrugging, shaking his head. "Why not, I couldn't have a better guide."
As we walked, Ed's pulled his arm away from my waist, slipping his hand into mine. I was pointing out landmarks, good places to eat, what places had the best coffee and most importantly, places he'd want to avoid if he wanted to go under the radar. After I had ran out of the major hot spots, I started to show him some of my personal favorite spots, one of them being a certain train car I mentioned to him earlier. There was one spot in particular I wanted to show him. A simple park, with the river cutting through one part and a fountain in the middle lit by small flood lights lights. Sometimes there would be live musicians playing, giving it a whismical feel. The trees around the fountain were always wrapped in white christmas lights. If I ever needed to decompress or take a minute, this is where you could find me. We sat on a bench in front of the fountain, taking in the the view.
"I found this park my first week living here." My voice was soft. My gaze had turned to the fountain, letting my eyes fall out of focus. My mind going back to my first visit. Ed's attention was fully on me when I started talking. I could feel him shift on the bench so he was facing me instead of facing forward. "I was scared, this was the first time living on my own and I was hundreds of miles away from any family. It was pretty lonely, I'll admit, I had thought maybe I had made a mistake. I was wandering around, kind of lost since I hadn't quite figured out where everything was at. What better way than just wandering aimlessly, right? Then I stumbled across this place. The sun had just started to set and there was this lone jazz musician playing a pretty sad tune on a trumpet." Ed's eyes never left my face as I talked. I had pulled out my wallet, turning it over and over in my hands. My eyes had completely glazed over, overtaken by the nostaglia "I was wondering if I'd ever be able to call this place home. So I did what any child would do. I made my wish on a coin and threw it in the fountain. It sort of became a tradition. Any time I'm upset or feeling lost I come here and chuck another coin in the fountain." I fished a couple pennies out and held my hand out. He picked one out of the palm of my hand.
"Did it come true? Your wish?" His voice just as soft as mine. I turned to him, finally meeting his gaze.
"Yeah, it did."
"Well then, if it worked once...Close your eyes and make a wish." His eyes twinkling in the light of the fountain. I stood up, walking up to edge of the fountain. Ed had followed suit, standing to the left of me. I follow his suggestion and close my eyes, wrapping my hand around the small coin, holding it close to my chest in a clenched fist. Let this be the beginning of something good. I'm so tired of all the bad. I released the coin, hearing it's faint splash as is sank to the bottom with all the other wishes. I kept my eyes closed, hoping it wouldn't have a nasty twist like the last one. It may have came true, but it ended up causing alot of heartache in the end. I'm either an optimst at heart or just too stupid know when to give up.
I felt his arm come around my waist pulling me towards him. His lips came to mine, brushing against them gently. That little sneak. No wonder he told me to close my eyes. I slip my arms around his neck, threading my fingers through his thick, silky hair. Once he knew I was fully accepting of his kiss, it changed from careful to something more. I could feel his mouth open, his tonuge just grazing over my bottom lip. I opened my mouth, letting his tonuge in. His other hand came up, settling on the back of my head, his thumb brushing against my unmarked cheek. I found myself pressing against him, my hands pulling his head closer to mine, his arm pulling me closer to him in response. It felt like he was simataneously filling me and emptying me at the same time. I felt a pull from deep inside, bringing with it a spark of yearning. We could have stood there for minutes, it could have been hours. When he finally pulled away, I lightly bit his bottom lip, letting my teeth drag across.
"Wow..." I muttered breathlessly.
"Wow indeed, I've been waiting all night to do that." His thumb was still brushing against my cheek, the other hand at my back.
"Was it worth the wait?"
"It was more than I ever could have wished for." His voice was low and husky
"I agree, nothing could have prepared me for that."
When we separated, he reached into his jacket pocket, pulling out the penny I had given him. He looked down at it, letting his own eyes fall closed. A small smile forming on his face, he jostled it a couple times before tossing it into the fountain with mine. Light had just began creeping its way across the sky, mingling with what stars were left. He took my hand in his again before we headed off in the direction of his hotel. We stopped just outside the door, still hand in hand.
"Well, this isn't exactly how I pictured our first date..." He said sheepishly, running his hand through his hair.
I'm guessing he had pictured us in a restaurant, nice clothes, sort of romantic. Not at a diner at 2 AM and definitely not in causal sleepwear.
"Me either, but I had a really good time. If I could do it over, I would keep everything the same." I wrinkle my nose "Might have taken Douchey Mcgoo out of the picture though "
He hesitiated, pulling his sleeves down over his hands again. I'm starting to see that it had nothing to do with hiding his tattoos, it's a nervous habit of his. "Would you- would you like to come upstairs? I've still got, what, seven days of the Simpsons to get through, if you'd care to join me. It's alot more fun when you've got someone to laugh and enjoy it with."
After a brief debate of is he talking about watching the simpsons or "watching the simpsons" I had decided.
“I'd like that. I'm not ready to call it a night just yet."
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It certainly seems like the world of streaming video entered
By Alex Cranz on at It certainly seems like the world of streaming video entered a new epoch recently Last week, Comcast finally handed the reigns of Hulu over to Disney , which means the company will have not only the impending Disney+ streaming service but also a live TV service that competes with the big cable companies Then, the very same day, we saw a genuinely awful outcome of AT&T’s acquisition of Time Warner, when CEO Randall Stephenson announced that Friends and other WarnerMedia-owned shows would be pulled from Netflix to run exclusively on the company’s forthcoming streaming platform Apple reminded us of its foray into streaming with the release of the new Apple TV app, which will support TV+ later this year, and US cable channel IFC announced it’s own streaming service Look at all those content fiefdoms As these companies snatch hold of rights and create their new exclusive content, they’re cordoning off their empires and demanding you to either ignore some of the most talked about TV shows and films available or pay your way into their services Either way, it’s a dark future for the streamer Now you might think “well I can just not subscribe!” or maybe “I don’t need to revisit Friends or the enormous catalogue of classic films Warner now owns ” And that’s very true But for many, that’s not realistic People naturally want to be included in conversations The Internet has only bolstered the water cooler imperative of keeping up with mass culture events like Avengers: Endgame and Game of Thrones Disney recognises this. The company now owns the rights to some of the largest franchises in the business and is slowly pulling them from all other competing streaming platforms to force people to watch them on Disney+ Want to watch a Marvel movie or Star Wars ? What about X-Men? Got a hankering for those blue Avatar people? Need to check out Frozen , Moana , The Incredibles or Aladdin ? You’ll have to cough up cash for Disney+ And you’ll be paying Disney for the privilege of watching ESPN too It owns that, not to mention A&E, ABC, History Channel, a big chunk of Vice, FX and even Lifetime As we said before, Disney now owns Hulu outright, too – AT&T sold its share last month, and Comcast agreed to relinquish its share last week Whenever a company consolidates large portions of a commodity that everyone wants, the first concern that comes to mind is cost Streaming could get a whole lot more expensive Remember how cheap Netflix was when it was just a dinky little add-on to the disc subscription service? But over the years it’s crept up It’s now double the price it was five years ago Disney, with its now enormous catalogue of content (a catalogue far more extensive and potentially more lucrative than Netflix’s), has already spread subscriptions across three different services: Hulu, ESPN, and soon Disney+ After it hooks US viewers on Disney+ for $7 (£550) a month later this year, and internationally within the next two years, it could very easily start increasing the price (No one at Disney has said as much to date) It’s a tactic that has served TV providers well for some time Lure them in with introductory prices, get them addicted to the service provided, and then raise the price. You could shut off the never-ending stream of Moana, but will you? As irritating and expensive as Disney’s streaming monopoly will be, it’s the company’s dominance over culture that feels the most terrifying So far this year, Disney has dominated roughly 35 per cent of the American box office sales, according to Box Office Mojo Combined with Warner Bros, that number jumps to about half of the US. box office Very few companies are producing a large percentage of what we watch, and as they consolidate the means of distribution via the Internet, it’s beginning to feel like they’ve got too much power – it ends badly And we know that because this isn’t the first time a few companies have controlled both the production and distribution of huge amounts of entertainment. Back in the 1940s, you had a similar system, in some respects. “Basically the studios financed the movies, produced them themselves at their own companies and then they also owned some movies theaters,” Karina Longworth , a Hollywood historian and host of You Must Remember This , told me This meant they could give sweetheart distribution deals to their own cinemas while gouging competitors and it meant, if you wanted to be in the business of making movies, you also probably had to be in the business of building cinemas all across the United States According to Longworth, the US government perceived that vertical integration of the entertainment business as a monopoly. Following a series of anti-trust actions and negotiations in the 1930s and 1940s, the studios ended up divesting themselves of their control over cinemas According to Longworth, the effect wasn’t immediately felt by consumers in any kind of financial way, but it had huge ramifications for the film industry, and for the kind of voices that were prioritised in movies “There was, for all intents and purposes, no such thing as independent film that got any kind of distribution until the 1950s” No indie film meant every single movie being made was dictated, to some degree, by a very small group of people at the very top of these studios And while the people running studios can lift up and amplify a wide variety of voices and experiences, that’s not always practically the case Black cinema wasn’t embraced by the big studios, nor was queer cinema Films featuring people from other countries weren’t common. And thanks to the draconian nature of the Hays code and its enforcers (collectively working as the precursor to the frequently as awful MPAA ) there was a broad swathe of subject matter the big studios wouldn’t touch You couldn’t even make a film decrying Nazism until right before the US entered World War II Filmmakers getting out of the exhibiting game changed things dramatically And those studios getting back into the exhibiting game, via the streaming, could change things too It’s not clear just how Disney’s new direct to consumer strategy will affect what kinds of content it makes A cynic might be tempted to read far too much into recent developments as an indication of what the company’s plans are. Disney wanted to create its own streaming service, so the Marvel shows at Netflix were all cancelled Instead of a bulletproof black man taking on a corrupt Blue Lives Matter world ( Luke Cage ), and a victim of sexual assault learning to overcome her PTSD ( Jessica Jones ), you’ll be getting Disney+ shows like the one about soldiers travelling the world fighting bad guys , the one about a time-travelling trickster Norse god , and one about a lady in love with a robot who has been dead since 2018 Maybe they’ll be good and challenging, and all of my hand-wringing will be proven wrong Longworth told me she didn’t think any studio has ever commanded as much of the box office as Disney now does (MGM at its peak had only about a 22 per cent market share ) The company is inescapable and thanks to its streaming holdings, its iron grip on our attention and our entertainment expenditure has never been stronger. Featured illustration: Jim Cooke (Gizmodo) Tags: Read the full article
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New Post has been published on WilliamBruceWest.com
New Post has been published on http://www.williambrucewest.com/2017/05/19/west-week-ever-pop-culture-review-51917-upfronts-edition/
West Week Ever: Pop Culture In Review - 5/19/17 (Upfronts Edition)
Since this is my 4th annual network TV upfronts recap, we’re doing things a bit differently this week. So, sit back and hunker down, as this is gonna be a long one!
First up, I joined my buddy @ClassickMateria for the Classick Team-Up! Podcast last week, and the episode is now available to download. We chatted about Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2, recent TV news, and everything else under the sun. Definitely check it out here!
Things You Might Have Missed This Week
Avi Kaplan quit the Grammy Award-winning a cappella group Pentatonix, because he missed his friends and family. I dunno about you, but I think that money could replace them!
Katy Perry has signed on as the first judge on ABC’s American Idol reboot, while there are reports that Idol finalist Chris Daughtry is in talks to join the show
The Big Bang Theory star Jim Parsons married his longtime partner, Todd Spiewak
The Flash cast member Keiynan Lonsdale came out as bisexual in an Instagram post
Hamilton‘s Daveed Diggs will star in TNT’s Snowpiercer pilot, based on the film, based on the French graphic novel
Conan O’Brien’s contract with TBS has been renewed through 2022, though no word on whether his show will switch to a weekly format as previously rumored.
DC stays losing, as actor Billy Crudup has left the Flash film, while it’s reported that Sam Raimi has turned down the director job
Power Rangers movie Black Ranger Ludi Lin has joined DC’s Aquaman film in the role of “Murk”, whoever that is…
Fox News personality, and former wife of California Lt Governor Gavin Newsom, Kimberly Guilfoyle has stated that she is currently being considered by the Trump Administration to replace Sean Spicer as White House Press Secretary. Gee, wonder what they see in her…
After 9 seasons, this weekend’s season finale will by Bobby Moynihan’s final episode of Saturday Night Live, as his series Me, Myself, and I was picked up at CBS.
LEGO Marvel Superheroes 2 was announced, but it won’t be on the Xbox 360, so it means nothing to me
In the Live Stage Show on TV department, Fox announced that they will air A Christmas Story Live in December, followed by Rent Live later in the season. Meanwhile, ABC will air The Wonderful World of Disney: The Little Mermaid Live in October
I covered a ton of renewals and cancellations that went down last week, but this week was no different, as the networks had to lock in their schedules for the fall. Here’s what’s been canceled/renewed since the last time we talked:
Cancellations
Shots Fired (Fox)
2 Broke Girls (CBS)
Baby Daddy (Freeform)
The Great Indoors (CBS)
Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders (CBS)
Scream Queens (Fox)
The Odd Couple (CBS)
Training Day (CBS)
Ransom (CBS)
Renewals
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (Fox)
Speechless (ABC)
Fresh Off The Boat (ABC)
The Son (AMC)
The Exorcist (?! – Fox)
Timeless (uncanceled by NBC)
Law & Order: SVU (NBC)
Elementary (CBS)
The Amazing Race (CBS)
Quantico (ABC)
New Girl (abbreviated 8-episode final season, with 3 year time jump – Fox)
Code Black (CBS)
Arrested Development (Netflix)
courtesy of TVLine.com
So, as I pointed out up top, this was Upfronts Week for the major networks, where they unveil their fall schedules to reporters and critics. I’ve got to say that this upcoming season does very little for me. While last year’s presentations had me excited, this year’s stuff just looks like retreads of ideas we’ve already had or obvious film scripts that have been adapted for television. That’s something that you’re going to notice a lot this year: shows that would probably make decent movies, but aren’t something you’d want to check in on a weekly basis. The week started with NBC’s presentation, so let’s start with their new shows:
NBC
NBC renewed a big chunk of their schedule, and they’re holding a lot of their new shows for midseason (for which they didn’t give us trailers!), so there’s not a lot of new for the Fall.
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The Brave – Formerly known as For God and Country, The Brave follows a multicultural team doing what I call “soldier shit”. That’s not to minimize what soldiers do; it’s just that there are certain things, like rescuing hostages, killing terrorists, etc, that are pretty much taken care of mainly by soldiers. Ya know, soldier shit. There are a lot of soldier shit shows coming this season, and this is merely one of them. We’re not necessarily in the most patriotic place right now, so I don’t know how these shows will fair. The trailer gives away the whole pilot, so do with that what you will. There’s an audience for this show, but I’m not it. Airing Mondays at 10, it’ll have a great lead-in in the form of The Voice, and its main competition in the timeslot will be Scorpion on CBS. By all accounts, it should have a fighting chance, so it’s The Brave‘s game to lose.
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Law & Order True Crime: The Menendez Murders – I guess enough time has passed that this case is considered “sexy” now. Back in the early 90s, the Menendez Brothers killed their parents and it was a big deal. The brothers went to jail, where they started amassing groupies like they were in a boyband or something. I’m not even lying! Anyway, this is an anthology series, so it really doesn’t matter how it does. If it does well, we get another installment based on another real life crime. If it flops, then they can just act like it was a One & Done idea, and throw it out like all the other Law & Order spinoffs we’ve had over the years. It’s only 8 episodes long, and the timeslot goes to Chicago Med once it’s done. Anyway, it’s perched atop NBC’s newly rechristened Must See Thursday Night, with This Is Us as a lead-in, so they clearly expect big things from it. Its competition will be How To Get Away With Murder, which is by far the lowest rated of the ABC Shondaland dramas, and Shemar Moore’s S.W.A.T. over on CBS. I think it’ll do just fine.
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Will & Grace – So, this show’s back. Yay? I really loved the show in its original run, but I didn’t need it back. And while I barely remember its series finale, I remember something about Will & Grace not having spoken to each other for 15 years. So, is that out the window now? Who cares, I guess. I mean, if they can bring Roseanne back with all its continuity issues (yeah, I’ll get to that), then they can pull this off. I just don’t really know what the endgame is here. I mean, besides the fact that we’re in the Trump Administration, has the world really changed that much to be reflected in this show? I mean, any rights Will or Jack were granted are basically about to be taken away any day now, but is the show even going to go there? I just don’t see the point of this one. But it’s only, like, 12 episodes and, like all of these revivals, they’ll play it coy on longevity until they see how the numbers look. It’s going up against Grey’s Anatomy, Gotham on its new night, Supernatural, and The Big Bang Theory. Now, from a socioeconomic demographic standpoint, W&G and TBBT are going after different audiences, but I feel like the W&G audience moved on to Grey’s. It’ll be interesting to see how this one plays out.
Let’s talk about some of NBC’s moves. Both Thursday night veterans Superstore and The Good Place are shifting to Tuesdays at 9 and 9:30. Now, they will have The Voice as a lead-in, but I feel like they should’ve stayed on Thursday if NBC really wanted to rebuild that night. I get that This Is Us is the breakout hit of the season, but that doesn’t mean it’s time to move it. It means it’s gonna be an uphill battle for NBC’s Tuesday comedies, as they’ll now be going up against Black-ish on its new night, as well as the Fox combo of Brooklyn Nine-Nine and The Mick. As far as Tuesday comedies go, somebody’s gonna have to flinch. The Fox shows don’t do all that well, but the NBC shows are kinda precious right now. They need to be nurtured, which is what leaving them on Thursday would’ve done. The Blacklist, meanwhile, moves to Wednesdays at 8, where it’ll go up against the moved Riverdale and Empire. I think they all have different audiences, though, so it shouldn’t take too much of a hit. Thursday got blown up, with Great News getting the post-Will & Grace slot mainly because Tina Fey. And This Is Us on its new night will now go up against Scandal *in its final season*. The balls on NBC! I get that it’s their chance to install a show that could take over Thursday once Scandal is done, but this is a risky move. Meanwhile, Blindspot and Taken are moving to Fridays where they’ll die because they’re both bubble shows that were narrowly renewed in the first place.
Fox
Next up, we’ve got Fox, where a WHOLE lot of shows are moving around. As for their new shows, they all look like interesting movies, but they just don’t grab me enough to want to be a regular viewer. Fox is really good about that. I remember loving Lethal Weapon this season, and then I didn’t watch a single episode after the pilot. I see a lot of that happening this season.
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Ghosted – Wow, where to begin? Two regular guys are kidnapped and recruited by a top secret organization that investigates the supernatural. As for casting, you can’t really go wrong with Craig Robinson and Adam Scott. This show is basically Hot Tub Time Machine 3, with more of a supernatural twist. The problem, however, is that’s exactly what this should have been: a mid-budget theatrical release that later finds its audience when it airs monthly on FX. This isn’t a weekly series, regardless of the fact that Robinson and Scott have fanbases. It’s slotted between The Simpsons and Family Guy, which sounds like a good thing, but that’s where middling comedies go to die. This season alone, that slot killed Son of Zorn and Making History. Now, it doesn’t really fit anywhere else on Fox’s schedule, as its “out there” nature makes it more at home with the animation stuff than, say, with New Girl and The Mick. So, that rules out Tuesday nights, which is the only other place Fox does comedies. Another problem is that Fox Sunday night just hasn’t been strong since they abolished the Animation Domination block. The Simpsons is a decent performer, and they keep it around to break records, while Family Guy is a shell of its former self, yet they don’t want to be the network that canceled it TWICE. Last Man on Earth is constantly a show on the bubble. Sunday nights need a shot in the arm, but this isn’t the show to do it. I don’t see this one having legs.
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The Gifted – This is the one everyone’s got their eyes on. A spinoff of the X-Men films, this show follows a family on the run when they discover that their kids are mutants. It doesn’t help that their dad is a former mutant hunter, so it’s his employers who are after them. I mean, it looks OK, but I didn’t wet my pants or anything. It’ll be really hard to do anything mind-blowing with a weekly TV budget, but the pilot was directed by Bryan Singer, so that’s gonna put butts in seats. Hell, if Gotham is going into season 4 (now on Thursdays at 8), I think this thing can survive. It’s probably pretty expensive, but Fox has been wanting to expand their comic offerings (after all, Black Lightning was originally meant for them), so this will be a good fit for the post Lucifer slot. Speaking of Lucifer, I never thought I’d see the day when a show about The Devil would air during the 8 PM hour (its new timeslot). I wonder how they feel about that in the Bible Belt. After all, I originally said they weren’t gonna let the show survive, and here it is entering season 3. I sure called that one wrong!
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The Orville – I love the idea here, as it’s basically Galaxy Quest: The Series. I mean, it’s clear Seth MacFarlane has an affinity for Star Trek, even if he’s spent more time reenacting the Star Wars saga on Family Guy. I’d love for this show to work, but I’m sure it’s on the expensive side. Now, Seth’s got a relationship with Fox, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they canceled it. It looks like the kind of show Fox loves to cancel. Now, it’s going up against Scandal and This Is Us, but I don’t think they share an audience. However, Arrow has been moved to Thursdays at 9, which I feel is its closest competition, as far as the male 18-49 demographic is concerned. There’s no way it wins its timeslot, so the question is what will Fox consider a “success” as far as its ratings go?
So, Fox’s moves are interesting. Lethal Weapon moves to Tuesday at 8, where it’ll go against The Voice, NCIS, and The Flash. It won’t win the timeslot, but maybe it can take some of The Flash‘s audience away from it. The Mick nows leads into Brooklyn Nine-Nine, as it’s now the stronger comedy, while Nine-Nine narrowly got renewed. On Wednesday, they moved Empire to 8, hoping it’ll be a good lead-in for Star. I honestly don’t think Star is a winner, and I think the only reason it got renewed was because A) it was created by Lee Daniels and B) its initial run was too short for them to gauge whether or not it was a success. For people looking for a nighttime soap as sudsy as Empire, they’re probably gonna choose the Dynasty reboot over on The CW, airing at the same time as Star. Meanwhile, Gotham moves to Thursday at 8, where it’ll go against The Big Bang Theory and Grey’s Anatomy. I think its biggest threat, however, comes in the form of Supernatural, now at 8 over on The CW.
Fox’s midseason bench doesn’t look too strong. I’ll take a quick look at those shows:
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LA To Vegas – It’s a show about the antics of a flight crew that handles the weekend LA to Vegas route. I don’t care who’s producing the thing, this is gonna be just another forgotten Fox sitcom.
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The Resident – Another “young doctor doesn’t play by the rules” show. It’s got Emily VanCamp, so that’s a plus. It could work. It looks very “Fox”.
ABC
ABC didn’t really do anything too drastic, with only a couple of new shows and a few moves.
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Ten Days In The Valley – Kyra Sedgwick plays a workaholic TV writer whose daughter goes missing. So, the show revolves around the hunt, and the fact that she can’t trust anyone around her, yadda yadda yadda. ABC probably feels like Sedgwick was quite the “get” after her critically acclaimed run on The Closer, but I just don’t know about this show. There’s nothing special about it. Sure, there will be twists and turns, but the fact that you can already predict those twists is what’s working against the show. Airing Sunday at 10, its only scripted competition, however, will be Madam Secretary over on CBS. I don’t think Madam is gonna destroy it, but I simply think this show is going to struggle to both find an audience and also keep that audience engaged. And what would a season 2 look like? I don’t think this is a winner.
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The Good Doctor – Fresh off A&E’s Bates Motel, Freddie Highmore stars as a young surgeon with autism. It’s from the creator of House, so you kinda know what you’re gonna get there. Ya know, he’s a miracle doctor who doesn’t do shit by the book. I really like the cast, with Richard Schiff (The West Wing), Hill Harper (CSI: NY), and Antonia Thomas (Misfits). I probably won’t watch it, but it could find an audience. The trick will be whether it genuinely portrays what it would be like to be an autistic surgeon. A lot of special interest groups will probably be keeping a close eye on this one, and I think a lot of people will be talking about it. Scheduled Monday at 10, its main competition is Scorpion and The Brave. I think it’ll do fine.
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The Mayor – A young rapper decides to run for mayor in order to get attention on his mixtape. Then he wins, and has to figure out how to actually be mayor. This sounds terrible. This is the kind of thing that would’ve gone straight to DVD starring fat Anthony Anderson back in 2001. I think the network was just desperate to get into bed with Daveed Diggs because of his Hamilton pedigree. While it will have Black-ish as its lead-in, it’s slotted where Imaginary Mary and The Real O’Neals went to die. Just like Tuesday 10 PM is the Death Slot, 9:30 isn’t much better. This thing simply doesn’t have legs. I just hope it lasts long enough for the rapper and Lea Michele to become a couple.
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The Gospel of Kevin – This looks like a reboot of Highway to Heaven. Jason Ritter plays Kevin Finn, who supposedly “isn’t a good guy”, even though the trailer doesn’t elaborate on why someone would think that. Anyway, one night he discovers a meteor, which actually contains an angel, played by comedian Cristela Alonzo. She’s gonna be his spirit guide, as he travels to country to gain his powers and change the lives of others. Yeah, it’s in the Tuesday Night Death slot, so that’s certainly a strike against it. Typically, new shows in the Tuesday 10 PM slot fail for ABC. Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. only survived because it was a veteran, and even it got banished to Friday. Nothing can survive at in that slot, for whatever reason, and I don’t see Kevin bucking that trend. This thing is simply too high concept, and I’m not sure America’s ready for another angel show right now. This one doesn’t have a prayer.
Let’s talk about ABC’s moves. Shark Tank moves to Sundays at 9. I don’t know about that one. I know they’re rebranding Friday nights, but now it’ll be going up against football and NCIS: LA. I think this is only temporary, as it’ll eventually find a new home on the schedule – perhaps Tuesdays at 10? One that’s kinda controversial in my mind is the Minority Block they’ve created on Tuesday night. Things kick off with the struggling Hecks of The Middle, who’re then followed up by the Asians of Fresh Off The Boat, and the Blacks of Black-ish and The Mayor. I haven’t seen something this calculated since the days of UPN. Still, I guess we should just shut up and be glad for the representation. It’s weird because ABC’s Wednesday night is their comedy crown jewel, though they’re clearly trying to take back Tuesday. It’s just a question now of how they’re branding those nights. I get that they don’t want to move Modern Family, but Black-ish benefited from the 9:30 Wednesday timeslot because, even though they were different races, the Dunphys and the Johnsons occupied the same socioeconomic class. That’s got to translate into some sort of data for ad buyers. I guess you could say Black-ish “graduated” if they feel it can survive without Modern Family protecting it, but I hate that its old timeslot was given to American Housewife, which I’m kinda surprised was renewed. On Friday, Once Upon A Time moves from Sunday, while Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. will take over the 9 PM slot once Inhumans ends its run. A lot of folks feel like this is the death knell for both shows, since a move to Friday is always seen as a death sentence. I’ve never understood that, though, because if nerds truly have no lives, then shouldn’t they be home to watch these shows? Anyway, these shows are still on the air because they perform well on DVR/internationally, so their ratings clearly aren’t the only deciding factor.
Oddly enough, ABC’s most interesting new shows are being held for midseason. Since they won’t show up until January, I’m only gonna do some quick drive-by thoughts on them:
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Alex, Inc – Zach Braff quits his successful job to start a podcast company. This is gonna look so dated when we look back on it, kinda like Selfie (remember that show?). It’s apparently going into the Sunday at 10 slot, so I guess Ten Days In The Valley will have wrapped by then. CBS will still probably have Madam Secretary, but Sunday Night Football will be over, so it’ll be interesting to see what NBC puts against it.
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The Crossing – Steve Zahn is a small town cop who gets pulled into a mystery when a bunch of refugees from the future (!) wash up on his beach. I know I said I don’t like saga shows, but I really liked this trailer, and I can’t wait to see what this show is all about.
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Deception – a cool as shit illusionist helps the FBI solve crimes. It’s SUCH a procedural, and there’s the whole will they/won’t they trope between him and the lady agent, but I don’t care. It looks so slick! I can’t wait.
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For the People – A new Shondaland show about young sexy lawyers doing young sexy lawyer shit. It’ll be right at home in TGIT, especially once Scandal ends and frees up a slot.
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Splitting Up Together – This is a movie, not a show! It’s good to see Jenna Fischer again, and I’ve loved Oliver Hudson since Rules of Engagement. It’s basically about a married couple trying to manage a “conscious uncoupling” while keeping their sanity. And there’s the slight hint that they may realize new things about each other and want to stay together. I have no idea how this is gonna go, but I’ll check it out.
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Let’s revisit that Tuesday night situation, though, shall we? I feel like Black-ish is only keeping that slot warm for Roseanne‘s 8-episode run that debuts in 2018. They wouldn’t use it to kick off the night, as Roseanne‘s blue collar humor doesn’t necessarily translate at that hour, and I hardly see them bumping Modern Family on Wednesday night. So, I could see Roseanne returning to her Tuesday 9 PM roost of yesteryear. By this point, of course, The Mayor will already have been canceled, but Roseanne pairs better with The Middle than with Black-ish. I see a lot of comedy moves coming midseason for ABC.
CBS
CBS is “America’s Most Watched Network”, so they’re not making too many moves. Let’s take a look at their new shows.
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Wisdom of the Crowd – Jeremy Piven, with a fresh set of hair plugs, stars as a software developer who creates a crowdsourcing app to help solve the murder of his daughter. Sounds a lot like Person of Interest, right? I mean, didn’t they have a machine that predicted crimes or some shit? I dunno. I never watched it. I just know it starred Jesus after he couldn’t get any work anywhere. Anyway, you should really watch this trailer because it contains stuff that is totally possible, and I’m not sure that’s such a good thing. It’s probably where society is heading, but the idea of crowdsourcing evidence to solve crimes just sounds like there are SO many things that could go wrong. As you see in the trailer, they’re gonna play the long game with the case surrounding Piven’s daughter, as that takes a backseat to the app being used to help the cops solve other crimes. CBS audiences are older and not very tech savvy. They don’t like when their shows get too “techy”. Sure, Person of Interest lasted 5 seasons, but take a look at Pure Genius from just this season. It was about a young tech billionaire who was gonna use cutting edge technology to cure all the world’s diseases. It was canceled after its initial 13 episode order. I know Piven can be polarizing, so I just don’t know about this one. Luckily, it’s scheduled Sunday at 8, with no scripted competition other than The Simpsons, so it should have room to breathe.
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9JKL – HATE the title. It sounds like text speak or some shit. Instead, it’s about 3 apartments. Recently divorced actor Mark Feuerstein moves into apartment 9K, which happens to be between his parents, Elliot Gould and Linda Lavin, in 9J and his brother and his family in 9L. So, it’s a multigenerational, multi camera sitcom, starring a bunch of folks who tend to star in shows that are canceled. Again, I think the title hurts it, but it’s the kind of show that CBS could take or leave. The Big Bang lead-in should definitely help it, but the true test will be when Bang moves back to Thursday. I don’t think it’ll be a breakout hit, as it’s not exactly reinventing the wheel, but it might end up on the bubble and eke out a second season if CBS doesn’t have a deep bench next pilot season.
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Me, Myself, and I – Oh, boy. Where to start with this? OK, we follow the main character at 3 different points in his life: age 14, when he meets the love of his life, age 40, when he’s newly divorced and trying to put his life back together, and age 65 when he’s reunited with the love from age 14. This show is doing A LOT! The casting is what makes it, though. The kid is a newcomer, but I think audiences will take to him like they did Sean Giambrone as Adam Goldberg. The 40 year old is a hapless loser, played capably by SNL‘s Bobby Moynihan. Meanwhile, the 65 year old is played by Night Court great John Larroquette. Oh, and Jaleel White must’ve spent all his Urkel money, ’cause he plays the 40 year old’s best friend. For me, the casting is what sells this show. I really want it to succeed ’cause I like everyone involved. It’s just going to be tricky to navigate 3 different time periods, and is there some sort of master 7-season plan where everything converges? I’m really pulling for this one, but its quirkiness asks a lot of its audience – especially since it’s going to dance around CBS’s Monday schedule for the first few months.
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SEAL Team – More soldier shit, and this time the team is led by the sidekick from Bones, while taking assignments from Don Draper’s “third” wife. It’s the familiar trope of “They do such terrible shit out there that it’s hard for them to adjust to civilian life when they’re home.” Out of the three soldier shit series debuting this season, however, I think this one has the best chance of renewal based on the fact that it appeals to the NCIS/CSI sensibilities of CBS’s built-in audience. Fun fact: the lead role was originally going to Jesus himself, Jim Caviezel, but was recast when Caviezel left the project over creative differences. He might’ve brought the Person of Interest audience with him, but seeing as how Bones ran for 12 years (and don’t forget Angel), Boreanaz probably has a deeper fanbase.
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Young Sheldon – This is such an interesting experiment: a single camera prequel to an aging multi camera sitcom. I know CBS wants to keep The Big Bang Theory machine chugging along, especially considering it’ll most likely be done in two years. I just always felt like a Sheldon was a Less Is More kind of character. I don’t need to know about his childhood because I get enough of a glimpse from his anecdotes. I feel like the audience that enjoys him actually enjoys Jim Parsons’s portrayal of him, rather than the character himself. On his own, Sheldon is kinda unlikeable, due to his lack of social skills and decorum. Since he’s on the spectrum, however, that’s all forgiven. Now, I think Iain Armitage does a pretty capable job of being a young Sheldon, but he’s also very off-putting to the viewer. I’m not sure anyone is going to root for him. Instead, you kinda feel sorry for the people in his orbit: his family, his teachers, etc. They simply live in a different world than he does. I will say that Zoe Perry does an amazing job portraying a younger version of Sheldon’s mom, played by her real-life mom, Laurie Metcalf. One of the biggest complaints about The Big Bang Theory is that its humor kinda appeals to the lowest common denominator. It might be a show about smart people, but it’s not necessarily a smart show. That said, the single camera format tends to be used for smart shows, i.e. Modern Family, Arrested Development, etc. Will the traditional TBBT audience migrate over to this new show and format? I’ll be very interested to see how this does.
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S.W.A.T. – Ah, the show based on the movie based on the show. I wasn’t sure about this at first. I honestly didn’t see Shemar Moore as a leading man. I mean, he couldn’t even carry Soul Train back in the day, so how could he headline his own series? Anyway, the captain from Stargate Universe shoots a kid, and gets fired (can you believe that justice?!), so his S.W.A.T. unit is handed over to Shemar Moore. Now Moore’s forced to police the inner city neighborhood in which he grew up. There’s gonna be a lot of Black Lives Matter vs Blue Lives Matter stuff going on here. What happens where you’re both? The show is executive produced by Justin Lin (Star Trek Beyond, Fast & Furious 6), but something about this feels like a late 90s NBC show instead of a 2017 CBS series. The same way we may not be patriotic enough for soldier shit shows right now, I’m not sure this is the show that’s gonna redeem cops in a lot of folks’ eyes. It kinda fits CBS’s demographic, but they don’t do so well with the TV shows based on movies (Training Day, Rush Hour). It’s going against How To Get Away With Murder, which is the lowest rated of the Shondaland dramas, but it’s also going against NBC’s Law & Order Menendez spinoff. Even with limited competition, I don’t think this one gets a second season.
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And while this isn’t going on the main network, it’s still a CBS show. Star Trek: Discovery. All I can say is “NO!” “NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!” I don’t know what I wanted, but this wasn’t it. I know some folks are so desperate for new Trek, but I want it to make sense, and I want it to be good. I knew a prequel was the wrong move because technology has come so far, so you can’t help but make it look better than The Original Series, though it should look less advanced due to when it’s set. A lot of people are gonna “cape” for it because it has a strong, Black woman as the protagonist, but those people can’t see the forest for the trees. Everything about this looks wrong to me. It’s funny that so many of us were wondering how we were gonna pirate this show, but after seeing this, I have no interest. It looks like a well-made fan film. Pass.
Looking at CBS’s moves, they really played it safe. On Sunday, NCIS: Los Angeles and Madam Secretary both move back an hour, filling the slot left by Elementary (coming back midseason), and making room for Wisdom of the Crowd. At this point, CBS is the only network with scripted drama on Sunday night, so I think they’ll do fine. Monday is in constant flux, depending on whether or not its football season. When the season starts, The Big Bang Theory will kick off the night, before it eventually moves back to Thursday, ceding its timeslot to Kevin Can Wait (which will start the season at 9 PM prior to the move). Once football ends, Superior Donuts will return to take the 9:30 slot occupied by new comedy Me, Myself, and I (which will shift to 9 PM). Whew! See, that’s CBS’s big problem: they move their “iffy” shows around so much that they can’t find an audience. 2 Broke Girls was all over the schedule this season before it got the chop. Even if folks don’t watch TV live anymore, these moves make them forget a show even comes on anymore. On Wednesday, Criminal Minds shifts to 10 to make room for David Boreanaz’s Seal Team. Thursday and Friday remain pretty much the same. Like I said, other than the Monday kerfuffle, CBS played it pretty safe while introducing more new shows that the other networks.
The CW
Finally, we come to The CW where moves abound. First, however, let’s look at the new shows.
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Valor – More soldier shit, only this time it’s with overacting pretty people and a dash of PTSD. It falls into the category of something I’d watch as a movie, but I just don’t like getting on board “saga” shows these days because they have so many layers, and run the risk of being canceled before answering all, or any, of their questions. If they’re smart, this is a one season storyline, and then they’ll have to reinvent the show for season 2. That said, from what I see, I don’t think they need to be rushing to figure out a second season quite yet. Airing Monday at 9, it’ll probably get trounced by The Gifted over on Fox, as they both seem to be male-skewing shows, and I see Fox winning this round. I also don’t feel like Supergirl is the proper lead-in series, but they seem committed to keeping her kicking off Monday nights.
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Dynasty – I’m too young to have watched the original, but this reboot is The CW’s bread and butter. I don’t know if the characters or plot points are the same, but it’s rich, pretty White people doing trifling shit to each other. And it’s by the producers of The O.C. and Gossip Girl? Yeah, they’ll get a good 4-5 seasons out of this. This isn’t the first franchise The CW has resurrected, as they also did it with 90210 and Melrose Place. The latter didn’t go so well for them, but the former was a reliable staple of their schedule for 5 seasons. I can definitely see the same here.
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Black Lightning – It looks like your standard Berlantiverse show, even if it takes place in its own universe. The question is whether or not “The Community” is going to support it. People always plead for diversity, but then they don’t show up when it’s time. If you put out a Black Lightning comic right now, it would not sell. It just wouldn’t. So, will White audiences want to watch a show about a Black inner city vigilante trying to clean up the streets – especially when there’s no lure of a crossover with the shows they already love? It’s being held for midseason, so maybe it’ll take over Legends of Tomorrow‘s timeslot once it airs its unusual number of episodes (seriously, they have, like 16-episode seasons over there for whatever reason). Here’s the kicker, though: according to the network, the show won’t take place in the established Arrowverse, mainly due to logistics. It will be filmed in Atlanta, while the other shows film in Vancouver. As such, they’re also not planning a 5-way crossover between the shows. That last part makes me kinda glad, as I didn’t really think they tuck the landing with this season’s 4-way “Invasion” crossover. People might come out for this, but they might not. I really don’t know which way the wind blows with this one.
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Life Sentence – This is a movie, not a TV series. A young girl who thought she was dying finds out she’s cured and now has to learn how to live her life. I’d like it to survive, as it’s co-executive-produced by Bill Lawrence of Scrubs fame, but this has as much staying power as this season’s No Tomorrow. Oh, you never even heard of No Tomorrow? It was about a young woman who thinks the world is going to end, so she has to learn to live life to its fullest in the time that she has left. Yeah, kind of the reverse of this. It got canceled after its initial 13 episodes. Anyway, it’s cute and quirky, but I figure there’s enough there for about 90 minutes – not a full season. Anyway, it’s pretty clear why they’re holding this lil midseason.
Now, let’s talk about the moves because they are drastic. Riverdale moves from Thursday to Wednesday at 8, pitting it against Empire, The Blacklist, Survivor, and The Goldbergs. The show has a following, though, so I really don’t think this move will hurt it too much. If anything, it’ll give White folks a sudsy alternative to Empire at the same time. On Thursday, Supernatural moves to 8, while Arrow, ceding its timeslot to Riverdale, now occupies Thursday at 9 – pitting it against This Is Us, The Orville, and the final season of Scandal. Poor fucking Arrow. That is not an enviable place to be, but DVR might help it. If it gets absolutely killed, six seasons was a good run. I think it’ll make it to seven, but this move does it absolutely no favors. On Friday, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend moves to 8, while Jane the Virgin moves from Monday at 9 to Friday at 9. Online buzz is what keeps Crazy on the air, so maybe they’re hoping that’ll be the case for Jane? I know Jane has a fanbase, and Supergirl wasn’t the most logical lead-in for it, but Friday is always such an uncomfortable situation.
Anyway, after all of this, I think ABC has the best new offerings, though they’re holding most of them til midseason. I feel like NBC has the most stable schedule, and they’re taking the fewest risks, but CBS has more new Fall shows that I’m genuinely curious about. So that’s why CBS won the upfronts and had the West Week Ever.
#A Cappella#Boybands#DC#DVDs#Indie#Marvel#Movies#Music#Politics#Pop#Power Rangers#Race#Television#Video Games#West Week Ever
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As states across the country issue stay-at-home orders to limit the spread of COVID-19, an increasing number of people are working from home, or they’ve lost their jobs and are navigating unemployment and hoping for the best. While this is all happening, countless memes and tweets joke about how people are perpetually watching Netflix or stress baking sourdough bread. One particularly contentious tweet asserted that people need to capitalize on all the “extra” free time:
If you don’t come out of this quarantine with either:
1.) a new skill 2.) starting what you’ve been putting off like a new business 3.) more knowledge
You didn’t ever lack the time, you lacked the discipline
— Jeremy Haynes (@TheJeremyHaynes) April 2, 2020
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The idea within the tweet—that we should use our time at home to be as productive as possible—isn’t a new one. But it has become more widespread and controversial during the COVID-19 pandemic, when some people may have more perceived free time, but are also feeling more stressed and anxious. The tweet “sums up all that is wrong about our hustle, work harder, be more culture,” says Lee Chambers, an environmental psychologist based in the United Kingdom. “It doesn’t take into account that many people will be in situations so challenging that purposely acquiring a new skill or business is not a priority right now,” he says.
Ericka Quezada-York, a certified nurse-midwife who works for a hospital-based OB/GYN practice in the Bronx in New York City, says that even though she sees a lot of her patients through telemedicine chats now, reducing some pre-appointment interaction time, she is spending even more time at work—so even her “normal” free time has become even more limited. “Because I spend so much time reviewing my charts to see who needs to come in face-to-face and who can be seen remotely, I estimate I spend an extra 60 to 90 minutes daily at work compared to before the pandemic,” she says. “On top of that, I spend a lot of time treating my patients for their pandemic anxiety [on top of everything else], and it takes me longer to take the [subway] between work and home because of transit reductions.”
Even if you do find yourself with new pockets of time, other emotional factors may be otherwise clouding your energy, precluding you from nimble productivity we glorify in more normal times. Take Erica Harvey, a bar owner in Las Vegas, who says she had to lay off 47 employees. After she closed her business, she made a list of everything she wanted to accomplish during the month she plans to have “off,” but she feels an overwhelming amount of guilt and depression from laying off her employees. “It’s all I can do to get out of bed,” she says. “I can’t even watch new shows or movies. I just keep watching old movies I’ve seen multiple times because my brain can’t process anything new.”
Even people who are safely working from home have had trouble adjusting to their new normal. Noel Liotta, who works in sales and marketing in Raleigh, North Carolina, says she’s working harder than ever because her company had to lay off employees for the first time in its 18-year history. “I’m just trying to keep some pulse on what normal is,” she says. At the start of the pandemic, she pulled out her guitar and keyboard, but she hasn’t touched either in almost two weeks. “I’m childless, I’ve still got a job, but I’m not doing anything extra or anything out of the ordinary except for a new Saturday night game night with friends via Zoom.”
Free time is a luxury, especially during a pandemic, when parents are trying to become teachers at home, health-care professionals and other essential employees can’t stop working, and those being laid off or reduced in hours are desperately trying to make ends meet.
Prioritizing productivity can lead to burnout, but it also changes the concept of “free time.” “When we are in this productivity mind-set, the concept of free time just doesn’t exist,” says Ander Camino, a therapist with Alma, a community for mental health professionals. Not only that, but when most people get off work, if they still have jobs, they might check in with family members and friends via phone, take care of their children, and meet their own basic needs. “We can easily fall into the mistake of perceiving [any free time] as an opportunity to invest and do more.”
But “more,” for many people, isn’t possible right now. Free time is a luxury, especially during a pandemic, when parents are trying to become teachers at home, health-care professionals and other essential employees can’t stop working, and those being laid off or reduced in hours are desperately trying to make ends meet.
Kelly Small is one of those parents, along with their wife. [Edit note: Small uses they/them pronouns.] A creative director living in Toronto, Small has struggled with the demands of homeschooling their 7-year-old child. “We both work full time from home,” Small says. “It’s chaos to try to manage kids and clients all at once.” Any semblance of “free time” has nearly vanished.
Quezada-York says it’s much harder for her to find free time than it was before the pandemic. Her wife, who is a stay-at-home parent, is now supervising their 9-year-old child’s remote learning program. Their three year old also just started speech therapy and physical therapy—the latter moving forward over video chat. “Our whole schedule of doing chores and all those little household-running things is way off,” she says. Pre-pandemic, she used to enjoy reading during her commute, but she thinks that wearing a mask 11 hours a day makes it hard for her to focus. Even at home, she says doing anything other than resting is difficult. “Once I’ve finished all my work-work and my household work for the day, maybe [before the pandemic] I would have watched some TV or done some reading or played a game, but now I just want to sleep,” she says.
That makes sense, Chambers says, because for most people, now is not the time to take on more. He says people need to prioritize their own well-being, and if they have free time, consider helping those who don’t. “Everyone has their own challenges in this period, and those with more free time should be looking to support the most vulnerable and the overburdened, not being individualistic and having tunnel vision, missing what they could be doing for their communities,” he says. “It is the time to be more for each other, to do what we can to support ourselves and others through the challenges we face.”
from Good Advice – Well+Good https://ift.tt/2xQ5loq via IFTTT
#No#we actually *don’t* have a ton of free time right now. Why we need to stop perpetuating that myt
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What podcasters can learn from the Tiger King
The Train Wreck That is the Tiger King is in the Top 10 of Netflix
After the fourth person had asked me if I had watched the Tiger King on Netflix I decided to give it a try. It's not good. I got about halfway through and only watched the second half looking for closure. It's bad people behaving badly. I was on a Zoom call with my family and my brother had not seen it yet, and as he put it "everybody is talking about it." The whole family said the same thing, "it's awful, its a waste of time." I'm pretty sure he's going to start watching it. Why? Well here are some things podcasters can gleam from Joe Exotic (i.e. The "Tiger King").
Table of Contents:
01:27 I'm in Facebook Jail
21:53 Focusrite Studio Makeover
23:17 Misty Phillip from Spark Christian Podcast Conference
37:23 Podcast Rodeo Show Promo
39:00 Consulting with Dave
39:45 Danny Pena Connects with His Audience
42:19 Question of the Month Promo
43:08 Get On the Podcast
44:32 Bloopers
Joe Exoctic is Unique
Joe lives in the middle of nowhere Oklahoma. Even by "Florida Man" (home of bizarre behavior) standards Joe Exotic is very unique. I'm going to kind of spoil the show, so if you haven't watched and it and plan on doing so, now is the time to stop reading.
Joe is a gun-toting, country music singing, gay, polygamist, Youtuber, who likes to blow things up at his zoo where he has tigers, alligators, and other exotic animals while he manages his campaigns for President and Governor.
He is what some people might call "a character." I could go on, but I think I've made my point.
Joe Had a Unique Product That Solved a Problem
Joe would breed tigers and take the cubs on tours to small where people could pet them and get their picture taken. It's like Santa with claws and teeth. Much like Santa, Joe was taking in the cash because he was providing something you can't get anyplace else. Consequently, he was making some serious cash.
Joe Lost Sight of His Audience
Joe's arch-nemesis is Carol Baskins who is also "unique" in that her very rich husband disappeared a few years ago making her rich and they never found his body. Carol runs a large cat "Rescue" that looks a lot like a zoo. She has an army of volunteers who work for her. She is basically doing the same thing Joe is (has a large plot of land where people can see large Cats in cages) but Carol has a WHY. Some people become fans of what you do, other people become fans of people because of why they do it.
Carol helped Joe's mall tour get shut down. Instead of looking for another solution, another product, or another animal, Joe got distracted. Instead of talking to his audience and asking them what else they might want, he became 100% obsessed with competition.
Joe Started To Compare Himself to Others
Joe did some things right. He reached out to other large cat owners (who are also living "differently" than most people) and attempted to mimic their success. However, as time goes on you see Joe simply go from hating Carol Baskins, to obsessing over her. His only "TV Show" seemed to be him talking about Carol and what a bad person she was, and how she couldn't bring him down, etc. Joe forgot he was the Tiger King, and became the Carol Baskins King.
Comparison is the Thief of Joy
The more Joe obsessed over what Carol was up to, the less he focused on his audience. You don't see him looking into adding creating better environments for the cats that might also get the audience closer to the cats. I once lead classes on Microsoft Office to the staff of the Akron Zoo. That is their whole purpose. Making an exhibit that made life enjoyable for the animals while getting the audience as close as possible and keeping both the animal and audience safe. Over the years their audience has grown and their prices have risen as well as you get a great experience and don't have to spend an hour driving to Cleveland.
Surround Yourself with Good People
The part of the story that tugged at my heart more than the Tigers, was one of Joe's husbands has lost most of his teeth due to a meth problem. He stuck around Joe because Joe bought him guns, trucks, and another thing (and he got to pet large cats). Joe treats his staff horribly, takes them for granted, and creates a revolving door of workers.
Things Do Not End Well
When you are deprived of joy and become frightened, angry, or any other emotion that is not calm and collected you can make bad decisions. Joe is the king of bad decisions. It turns out that Joe had actually killed some of his older cats, and if you want to watch more disturbing things on Netflix watch Don't F*ck with Cats.
Misty Phillip From the Spark Christian Podcast Conference
I was honored to speak at the Spark Christian Podcast Conference last year. It was an amazing event, and the mind-boggling part it was thrown together in very little time. In this interview with Misty Phillip (who also has a podcast), she gives some behind the scenes of how she pulled this off. Key points include:
She released control to someone who had experience (which is very hard as you only get once chance to make a first impression, and this was the first year of the event).
She was amazed at how many people said YES (so if you're afraid to start something - people you think will say no might say YES)
She did a Kickstarter to gauge the overall interest which helped her avoid getting in over her head financially
She has built a network over the years, and those people will want to support you.
Dany Peña Still Connecting With Audience During Pandemic
Hall of fame podcaster Danny Peña has been on the show before and is known for a man who is always building and servicing his community at Gamertag Radio. So how do you do that when everyone is ordered to stay indoors (Danny is in New York City)? You use the tools you have like Voicemail, Speakpipe, and Email. In the end, Danny said it's about the connection, not the quality of the content coming in from his listeners. Check ou Danny at www.gamertagradio.com
I'm in Facebook Jail -How Do I Get Out?
I haven't changed the way I've used Facebook in the many years I've used it, but now I'm in Facebook jail.
Here is the one of the messages that I put in my own private Facebook that got flagged as Spam ( www.schoolofpodcasting.com/717 )
If you know any tips or insights, or any connections to someone at Facebook, I'd love to hear from you. Currently, you can't link to the School of Podcasting on Facebook.
Start Your Podcast Today Join the School of Podcasting
Step by step tutorials
Live group coaching (get your questions asked)
Private Facebook filled with other brilliant podcasting minds
Priority email support with private instructional videos (ask a question expect a video answer)
30-day money-back Guarantee
Start your podcast today. Click Here
Mentioned In This Episode
Netflix show Tiger King
Neflix show Don't F*ck with Cats.
Check out this episode!
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Viral Taxes, Tesla Production Maxes, Dick’s Be Axin’
Viral Taxes, Tesla Production Maxes, Dick’s Be Axin’:
Tax Cuts for Viruses
I have a TLDR (too long, didn’t read) for you today: Stocks are up today … because stocks were down yesterday.
It’s a bit tongue-in-cheek, but if the shoe fits … I think we can all agree that the market’s volatility has just been ridiculous lately.
The financial media tell you that Wall Street is rallying because the White House is finally pulling together a plan to combat the coronavirus. That plan, which may or may not be ready, involves a hefty amount of economic stimulus.
The White House is banking on a payroll tax cut, a potential stimulus for the travel industry and other economic relief.
“We are to be meeting with House Republicans, Mitch McConnell, and discussing a possible payroll tax cut or relief, substantial relief, very substantial relief,” President Trump said at a press briefing last night.
The move arrives on the heels of an $8.3 billion spending package passed on Friday, which was designed to support state virus responses and boost vaccine research spending.
Any such deal will have to move through both the Senate and the House. But reportedly, President Trump will hold a briefing today to outline details of the economic package. Reports also indicate that the package could include “a short-term expansion of paid sick leave,” according to the infamous “people familiar with the matter.”
The Takeaway:
The $8.3 billion already thrown at state preparedness and vaccine research was clearly a non-starter for Wall Street.
But payroll tax cuts? That’s got everyone in a bullish tizzy.
It’s time for a reality check.
Tell me: How will millions of Americans actually get that money when they’re too sick to go to work?
Even better, how will they spend that extra money if they’re sick and/or quarantined?
(Seriously, tell me! Email us at [email protected] and let us know your thoughts.)
I would argue that if the American economy is as strong as this administration claims, people already have money. Could they use some more? Certainly. We can always use more money.
But viruses don’t care about money. They care about prevention, containment and trust in your government to handle the situation. As I’m sure most Great Stuff readers would agree, we’re sorely lacking on all three fronts right now.
So, while Wall Street likes the idea of a payroll tax cut on the surface, clearer heads will eventually prevail and see this for what it is: a smokescreen to curry public favor.
President Trump has been very good for the stock market. But when it comes to the coronavirus outbreak … the emperor has no clothes.
Now, viruses may not care about tax cuts … but if President Trump offers one, who are we to look a gift horse in the mouth?
After all, why should tax loopholes only work for the 1%?! (Click here.)
Good: Parts Production Parade
Increased production? In my coronavirus outbreak? It’s more likely than you think.
Today, Tesla Inc. (Nasdaq: TSLA) announced that it’s ramping up production capacity for car parts in China. As part of its goal to locally source all parts for Chinese-made vehicles, Tesla will add production lines to its Shanghai factory.
Those parts will eventually include battery pack components, electric motors and motor controllers. Right now, however, Tesla has only confirmed additional production lines for cooling pipes for Tesla heat-management systems.
Localization of Tesla parts in China is a major hurdle for production costs in the country. Currently, Tesla imports about 70% of the parts for Chinese-made vehicles.
Wall Street appears to be happy with the news, as TSLA shares outpaced the broader market’s gains today.
Better: No Hunting
Everyone said it couldn’t be done. Everyone said you couldn’t take hunting supplies out of Dick’s Sporting Goods Inc. (NYSE: DKS). “The company would go under!” they claimed. Boycotts were organized. Rabble-rousers roused rabble, and so on.
But Dick’s hasn’t merely carried on — it’s beating expectations. This morning, the company announced that it earned $1.32 per share in the fourth quarter, topping the consensus by $0.10 per share. Revenue topped Wall Street’s view by $120 million, and same-store sales growth soared to 5.3%, blasting past estimates for 3% growth.
And if that wasn’t enough, Dick’s also announced that it’ll remove the hunting category from another 440 stores this year and boost its quarterly dividend by 13.6%.
The company did give a nod to the coronavirus, issuing conservative guidance for fiscal 2020. However, that guidance was still well within Wall Street’s expectations.
It seems that Dick’s can still fire from the hip — even without gun sales.
Best: Fire, Ready, AIM
If you need more proof that there are serious pockets of opportunity out there in this volatile market, look no further than Aim ImmunoTech Inc. (NYSE: AIM). This biotech focuses on cancer, immunodeficiency and antiviral therapeutics.
With that lead-in, you probably already see where this is going.
Yesterday, Japan’s National Institute of Infectious Diseases (NIID) announced that it’ll begin testing Aim’s Ampligen drug as a treatment for COVID-19. Ampligen was developed to treat the 2002 SARS outbreak. Researchers believe that the similarities between SARS and COVID will make Ampligen a viable treatment for the current outbreak.
According to Aim: “In those studies of SARS-infected mice, Ampligen stands out as the only drug tested that conferred a significant survival effect: 100% of the Ampligen-treated mice survived, while none of the untreated mice survived.”
The NIID hopes that Aim’s drug will have the same success rate with COVID-19.
The bonus for Aim is that Ampligen is already an established antiviral treatment on the market — i.e., it’s already passed human safety trials. All that’s left to do is prove that it’s effective against the coronavirus, and Bob’s your uncle.
Wall Street realized this yesterday and sent Aim shares soaring more than 100%. The stock fell sharply on profit-taking today, but ambitious investors looking for an opportunity might consider taking a risk and jumping on board.
If it makes you uncomfortable when things go down, don’t look.
— Chris Remedios, a certified financial planner with Remedios Financial Planning
Well done Slytherin, well done … however, what if you trade on Robinhood and literally can’t look at your positions?
Checkmate, other brokers. Nothing’s down if you can’t look at your account. (It’s one of Robinhood’s hidden perks.)
Great Stuff Rants: Inovio Pharmaceuticals
I am mad today, dear readers. I’m mad because you got hornswoggled. Ya been had. Ya been hoodwinked. Bamboozled. Led astray. Run amok.
Yesterday, Great Stuff recommended closing out your position on Inovio Pharmaceuticals Inc. (Nasdaq: INO). Early Monday morning, the stock had rallied to a fresh all-time high on hopes that the company’s COVID-19 vaccine would be ready much earlier than anyone had hoped.
I recommended taking profits ahead of the company’s quarterly earnings report and ongoing market volatility. I still like Inovio and its revolutionary system for designing DNA-based treatments and vaccines. This company is truly on the cutting edge of modern medicine.
You should’ve realized a 200%-plus gain on INO if you got in when Great Stuff recommended the stock. However, notorious short seller Citron Research had other plans.
Citron said in a tweet that “[the] SEC should immediately HALT this stock and investigate the ludicrous and dangerous claim that they designed a vaccine in 3 hours. This has been a serial stock promotion for years. This will trade back to $2. Investors have been warned.”
Inovio responded with the following statement: “A third-party report today demonstrated a lack of understanding of the science behind DNA medicines.”
A lack of tech understanding? You don’t say…
This is the short seller’s MO. Citron makes outlandish claims on red-hot tech companies because it knows most investors don’t understand the underlying tech. Then, Citron attempts to profit from the panic.
Here are some examples from the past couple of years:
June 9, 2017: Citron called Nvidia Corp. (Nasdaq: NVDA) a “casino stock” and said its rally had gone too far. NVDA went on to rally 63% in the next year.
October 6, 2017: Citron said that Shopify Inc. (NYSE: SHOP) would get “caught red handed by the FTC” as a “promoter of the hottest new ‘get rich quick’ scheme on the internet.” SHOP has since more than quadrupled in value.
November 28, 2017: Citron called Roku Inc. (Nasdaq: ROKU) a “total joke.” Roku has more than doubled since this tweet … guess who’s laughing now?
October 23, 2018: After remaining a bear since 2016, Citron finally relented on Tesla Inc. (Nasdaq: TSLA). It took Citron two years, but at least it finally got this one right.
June 11, 2019: Citron made a rare bullish call on Revolve Group Inc. (NYSE: RVLV). “Revolve has done what I call ‘fashtech’: the merging of fashion and technology,” the company said. Fashtech never really took off. RVLV is off about 68% since.
December 12, 2019: Citron set a $5 price target for Peloton Interactive Inc. (Nasdaq: PTON). OK, I agreed with this one — not the $5 price target, which will likely never materialize — but I’m throwing this one in to show that it’s not all bad.
The list goes on, including bearish positions on Tesla and Netflix Inc. (Nasdaq: NFLX). You get the picture.
The point is, dear readers, yesterday you got Citron-ed on Inovio. I’m almost tempted to get back into the stock, given the short seller’s track record. Almost … the market’s too volatile right now to go chasing waterfalls.
Most of you should’ve realized at least a 100% gain on INO — not the 200% gain I touted before the Citron rout. Given the S&P 500 Index’s 14.8% route through yesterday’s close, I’d say that’s not too shabby.
Meanwhile, Inovio will come back, and Great Stuff will be ready to pounce when it does.
If you’re looking for truth in tech investing, Ian King’s research is perfect for you. Not only can Ian find the right tipping-point trends to outlive viral markets, he also pinpoints each trend’s standout leader.
Click here to learn more about Ian’s tech research — the trends that even Citron can’t sully!
Remember, if you can’t get enough meme-y market goodness, follow Great Stuff on Facebook and Twitter.
Until next time, good trading!
Regards,
Joseph Hargett
Editor, Great Stuff
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Tax Cuts for Viruses
I have a TLDR (too long, didn’t read) for you today: Stocks are up today … because stocks were down yesterday.
It’s a bit tongue-in-cheek, but if the shoe fits … I think we can all agree that the market’s volatility has just been ridiculous lately.
The financial media tell you that Wall Street is rallying because the White House is finally pulling together a plan to combat the coronavirus. That plan, which may or may not be ready, involves a hefty amount of economic stimulus.
The White House is banking on a payroll tax cut, a potential stimulus for the travel industry and other economic relief.
“We are to be meeting with House Republicans, Mitch McConnell, and discussing a possible payroll tax cut or relief, substantial relief, very substantial relief,” President Trump said at a press briefing last night.
The move arrives on the heels of an $8.3 billion spending package passed on Friday, which was designed to support state virus responses and boost vaccine research spending.
Any such deal will have to move through both the Senate and the House. But reportedly, President Trump will hold a briefing today to outline details of the economic package. Reports also indicate that the package could include “a short-term expansion of paid sick leave,” according to the infamous “people familiar with the matter.”
The Takeaway:
The $8.3 billion already thrown at state preparedness and vaccine research was clearly a non-starter for Wall Street.
But payroll tax cuts? That’s got everyone in a bullish tizzy.
It’s time for a reality check.
Tell me: How will millions of Americans actually get that money when they’re too sick to go to work?
Even better, how will they spend that extra money if they’re sick and/or quarantined?
(Seriously, tell me! Email us at [email protected] and let us know your thoughts.)
I would argue that if the American economy is as strong as this administration claims, people already have money. Could they use some more? Certainly. We can always use more money.
But viruses don’t care about money. They care about prevention, containment and trust in your government to handle the situation. As I’m sure most Great Stuff readers would agree, we’re sorely lacking on all three fronts right now.
So, while Wall Street likes the idea of a payroll tax cut on the surface, clearer heads will eventually prevail and see this for what it is: a smokescreen to curry public favor.
President Trump has been very good for the stock market. But when it comes to the coronavirus outbreak … the emperor has no clothes.
Now, viruses may not care about tax cuts … but if President Trump offers one, who are we to look a gift horse in the mouth?
After all, why should tax loopholes only work for the 1%?! (Click here.)
Good: Parts Production Parade
Increased production? In my coronavirus outbreak? It’s more likely than you think.
Today, Tesla Inc. (Nasdaq: TSLA) announced that it’s ramping up production capacity for car parts in China. As part of its goal to locally source all parts for Chinese-made vehicles, Tesla will add production lines to its Shanghai factory.
Those parts will eventually include battery pack components, electric motors and motor controllers. Right now, however, Tesla has only confirmed additional production lines for cooling pipes for Tesla heat-management systems.
Localization of Tesla parts in China is a major hurdle for production costs in the country. Currently, Tesla imports about 70% of the parts for Chinese-made vehicles.
Wall Street appears to be happy with the news, as TSLA shares outpaced the broader market’s gains today.
Better: No Hunting
Everyone said it couldn’t be done. Everyone said you couldn’t take hunting supplies out of Dick’s Sporting Goods Inc. (NYSE: DKS). “The company would go under!” they claimed. Boycotts were organized. Rabble-rousers roused rabble, and so on.
But Dick’s hasn’t merely carried on — it’s beating expectations. This morning, the company announced that it earned $1.32 per share in the fourth quarter, topping the consensus by $0.10 per share. Revenue topped Wall Street’s view by $120 million, and same-store sales growth soared to 5.3%, blasting past estimates for 3% growth.
And if that wasn’t enough, Dick’s also announced that it’ll remove the hunting category from another 440 stores this year and boost its quarterly dividend by 13.6%.
The company did give a nod to the coronavirus, issuing conservative guidance for fiscal 2020. However, that guidance was still well within Wall Street’s expectations.
It seems that Dick’s can still fire from the hip — even without gun sales.
Best: Fire, Ready, AIM
If you need more proof that there are serious pockets of opportunity out there in this volatile market, look no further than Aim ImmunoTech Inc. (NYSE: AIM). This biotech focuses on cancer, immunodeficiency and antiviral therapeutics.
With that lead-in, you probably already see where this is going.
Yesterday, Japan’s National Institute of Infectious Diseases (NIID) announced that it’ll begin testing Aim’s Ampligen drug as a treatment for COVID-19. Ampligen was developed to treat the 2002 SARS outbreak. Researchers believe that the similarities between SARS and COVID will make Ampligen a viable treatment for the current outbreak.
According to Aim: “In those studies of SARS-infected mice, Ampligen stands out as the only drug tested that conferred a significant survival effect: 100% of the Ampligen-treated mice survived, while none of the untreated mice survived.”
The NIID hopes that Aim’s drug will have the same success rate with COVID-19.
The bonus for Aim is that Ampligen is already an established antiviral treatment on the market — i.e., it’s already passed human safety trials. All that’s left to do is prove that it’s effective against the coronavirus, and Bob’s your uncle.
Wall Street realized this yesterday and sent Aim shares soaring more than 100%. The stock fell sharply on profit-taking today, but ambitious investors looking for an opportunity might consider taking a risk and jumping on board.
If it makes you uncomfortable when things go down, don’t look.
— Chris Remedios, a certified financial planner with Remedios Financial Planning
Well done Slytherin, well done … however, what if you trade on Robinhood and literally can’t look at your positions?
Checkmate, other brokers. Nothing’s down if you can’t look at your account. (It’s one of Robinhood’s hidden perks.)
Great Stuff Rants: Inovio Pharmaceuticals
I am mad today, dear readers. I’m mad because you got hornswoggled. Ya been had. Ya been hoodwinked. Bamboozled. Led astray. Run amok.
Yesterday, Great Stuff recommended closing out your position on Inovio Pharmaceuticals Inc. (Nasdaq: INO). Early Monday morning, the stock had rallied to a fresh all-time high on hopes that the company’s COVID-19 vaccine would be ready much earlier than anyone had hoped.
I recommended taking profits ahead of the company’s quarterly earnings report and ongoing market volatility. I still like Inovio and its revolutionary system for designing DNA-based treatments and vaccines. This company is truly on the cutting edge of modern medicine.
You should’ve realized a 200%-plus gain on INO if you got in when Great Stuff recommended the stock. However, notorious short seller Citron Research had other plans.
Citron said in a tweet that “[the] SEC should immediately HALT this stock and investigate the ludicrous and dangerous claim that they designed a vaccine in 3 hours. This has been a serial stock promotion for years. This will trade back to $2. Investors have been warned.”
Inovio responded with the following statement: “A third-party report today demonstrated a lack of understanding of the science behind DNA medicines.”
A lack of tech understanding? You don’t say…
This is the short seller’s MO. Citron makes outlandish claims on red-hot tech companies because it knows most investors don’t understand the underlying tech. Then, Citron attempts to profit from the panic.
Here are some examples from the past couple of years:
June 9, 2017: Citron called Nvidia Corp. (Nasdaq: NVDA) a “casino stock” and said its rally had gone too far. NVDA went on to rally 63% in the next year.
October 6, 2017: Citron said that Shopify Inc. (NYSE: SHOP) would get “caught red handed by the FTC” as a “promoter of the hottest new ‘get rich quick’ scheme on the internet.” SHOP has since more than quadrupled in value.
November 28, 2017: Citron called Roku Inc. (Nasdaq: ROKU) a “total joke.” Roku has more than doubled since this tweet … guess who’s laughing now?
October 23, 2018: After remaining a bear since 2016, Citron finally relented on Tesla Inc. (Nasdaq: TSLA). It took Citron two years, but at least it finally got this one right.
June 11, 2019: Citron made a rare bullish call on Revolve Group Inc. (NYSE: RVLV). “Revolve has done what I call ‘fashtech’: the merging of fashion and technology,” the company said. Fashtech never really took off. RVLV is off about 68% since.
December 12, 2019: Citron set a $5 price target for Peloton Interactive Inc. (Nasdaq: PTON). OK, I agreed with this one — not the $5 price target, which will likely never materialize — but I’m throwing this one in to show that it’s not all bad.
The list goes on, including bearish positions on Tesla and Netflix Inc. (Nasdaq: NFLX). You get the picture.
The point is, dear readers, yesterday you got Citron-ed on Inovio. I’m almost tempted to get back into the stock, given the short seller’s track record. Almost … the market’s too volatile right now to go chasing waterfalls.
Most of you should’ve realized at least a 100% gain on INO — not the 200% gain I touted before the Citron rout. Given the S&P 500 Index’s 14.8% route through yesterday’s close, I’d say that’s not too shabby.
Meanwhile, Inovio will come back, and Great Stuff will be ready to pounce when it does.
If you’re looking for truth in tech investing, Ian King’s research is perfect for you. Not only can Ian find the right tipping-point trends to outlive viral markets, he also pinpoints each trend’s standout leader.
Click here to learn more about Ian’s tech research — the trends that even Citron can’t sully!
Remember, if you can’t get enough meme-y market goodness, follow Great Stuff on Facebook and Twitter.
Until next time, good trading!
Regards,
Joseph Hargett
Editor, Great Stuff
0 notes