#mentions of side jily

[resident-gay-bitch]

⭐️ Sirius Sundays ⭐️

Sirius + Harry + James hanging out together

Sirius crouches down on the ground, knees digging into the plush carpet and providing a warmth that the outside couldn’t bring. It’s cosy here, in the Potters living room, always has been. It’s one of his favorite places to be.

In his hand, is a blue little wooden train car, and he pushes it along the carpet, puffing out his cheeks and making animated steam train sounds with his mouth. He screeches, one eye squinting shut when the wooden train approaches a mountain, and prepares itself to go up.

The wooden toy with rickety wheels turns up, climbing over socked little toes, darting up a chubby leg and racing up his little body. He makes zooming noises with his mouth, so expressionate it makes little Harry burst out with laughter as the train zips over his head and back down the other side of him.

He laughs so hard his little face goes red, and whilst grabbing his feet, he begins to topple backwards.

Sirius drops the toy, hands darting out to catch the boy before his head hits the ground. On this plush carpet, no damage was sure to be done, but Sirius worries about his Godson. One can never be too careful, he believes.

Harry doesn’t relent with his giggling and Sirius begins to worry if the sweet boy can breathe at all. He lifts Harry high into the air, giving him a little shake that has him wiggling his arms and legs about with joy. And in one swift movement, he pulls Harry down into his hold and snuggles him tight, slapping dramatic kisses all over his chubby little face.

Harry is delighted by this, and he grabs for Sirius’ hair, small fingers trying to twist between the strands, but Sirius has it tied into double braids so no strands find themselves wrapped taught around his fingers.

That had happened, not too long ago, a strand of Lily’s hair had the babe crying so hard they rushed into St Mungoes for help. Now, there’s a strict rule to keep all hair tightly tied back, and double braids seem to be working the best for Lily, so Sirius bites.

He clicks his tongue, tutting at his Godson with a smile, “No, no, no, little Bambi. That’s my hair, you’ll get your own someday. If you turn out to be anything like your dad I promise you’ll have a glorious mop to mess with anytime you-“

“Oi!” James shouted, cutting across the living room to continue hanging decorations. It’s Lilys birthday today, and they’re going to have a party. Sirius is supposed to be helping with the decorations, but how is he supposed to get anything done when playing with Harry and his trains are an option?

Harry giggles some more.

Sirius sets him back down, sitting flat on his own arse now, Harry between his legs. They both face the little toy train tracks, and Sirius reaches to pull everything closer so Harry can play. He picks up a red train and shows it to Sirius, incoherent rambling leaving his lips until he’s blowing spit bubbles and laughing to himself. Sirius can’t help but laugh too.

“WOW!” Sirius gasped, “That story truly is magnificent, Harry.”

Harry smiles and turns back to his trains, leaning forward until he’s crawling, pushing the train back and forth a little distance. He’s trying to make zooming noises, just as Sirius had. With a smile, Sirius grabs his own train and makes noises for Harry to imitate.

The little boy makes his train zip around, laughing every time his crashes into Sirius’, the little rascal. He really is just like his dad.

Harry makes his train go up the hill of Sirius’ leg, and crawls along to make it drive up his torso and over his head, which Sirius had to lean down in order for Harry to reach.

Harry is beside himself with giggles, so Sirius snatches him up to tickle and blow raspberries on his puffy cheeks. His laughter is so delightful, Sirius can’t help but feel a tremendous amount of love for the baby. He’d do anything to ensure that laughter never dies. He’d do anything for Harry, anything at all.

Harry smiles at him, now held closely in Sirius’ arms for a cuddle. He presses a soft kiss to Harry’s brow and whispers, “I love you, Harry.”

Harry smiles up at him, little hands reaching up to grab at Sirius’ face. He tries to bring himself closer, and Sirius moves him where he likes, and Harry presses a kiss to the high of Sirius’ cheek. Or, well, what he supposes is a kiss. Harry just opened his mouth and pressed it to Sirius’ face, letting his slobber get everywhere in the process, and he popped his lips to imitate the sound of a kiss his parents always make when giving him kisses.

Sirius smiles at the boy, and smacks another dramatic little kiss on his cheek, and Harry goes to kiss Sirius’ nose, leaving it covered in saliva as well. Sirius laughed, smacking a few kisses all over the baby's chubby face, and Harry, of course, copy’s his behaviour, and by the time he’s done, Sirius’ face is wet and smells of formula.

“You are lucky you’re just a baby, Harry.” Sirius says, lifting the bottom of his shirt to wipe his face, “That is disgusting,” he says, sticking out his tongue in distaste.

Harry is beside himself with laughter again.

Sirius sits him back down on the ground between his legs, handing Harry the red train again, racing him with his own. James takes a seat on the ground beside them, clearly bored of setting up all on his own.

“He really loves you.” James comments, reaching out to pet his son on the head, “Thinks you’re the coolest.”

“I am the coolest.” Sirius says with a flourish of his hand, flicking a braid back behind his ear.

“I’m glad to know he has you if…”

“Don’t think about that, James.” Sirius said, putting a hand on the other man’s thigh to soothe him, “Nothing will happen to you. I’ll keep you safe, always.”

James smiled sadly, leaning his head over onto Sirius’ shoulder. He’s so tired these days, always so tired.

“Harry will grow up a happy boy.” Sirius said, nodding as if his words were certain. And to him, they were, he believed every single one of them.

Many years later, he’ll think about those words, all those promises he made, and they’ll haunt him.

“You and Lily will watch him grow, Prongs, I’ve no doubts about it. We’ll win the war for him. He’ll be the reason the war is won, I can feel it in my bones.” 

ouch, sorry about that

[commit-arson-immediately]

Ok but jegulus band au where they broke up a bit ago over a misunderstanding cuz theyre incapable of communicating and regulus writes golden retriever boy and James writes yours and they come out within days of each other and like the absolute chaos that comes from that

[sunshinemarauder]

Announcing... JILY WEEK 2024!

For the past two years, the lovely @thegobletofweasleys ran Jily Week. This year, she decided to step back from hosting it and passed it on to Kelsey ( @kay-elle-cee ) and me, who are so excited to share the Jily love with all of you! Jot it down on your calendar for August 19th to 25th!

To participate, post a creative work corresponding to the daily prompt - fanfiction, fanart, playlists, metas, moodboards, etcetera - anything goes! You can participate in as few or as many days as possible, but we challenge everyone to try and create something for every prompt, even if it's only a hundred-word drabble or a 5-minute sketch! Don't stress about meeting the exact prompt or the deadline - the most important thing is to have fun with it!

Remember to tag your works with #jily week 2024, mention @sunshinemarauder and @kay-elle-cee, and add any fic you write to the Jily Week 2024 AO3 Collection.

PROMPTS:

19th of August - Love is in the Hair

Featuring those iconic "wow"/"oh" moments: Lily getting distracted by that classic hand-through-hair moment from James, and James stunned speechless by Lily's ethereal redheaded beauty.

20th of August - Partners in Crime

Partners in Potions class, Aurors out on a case, fighting side-by-side in the Order, engaging in some espionage — these two do it all!

21st of August - In Vino Veritas

Those moments of suspicious-liquid-induced confessions, be they from Veritaserum, Felix Felicis, Amortentia, or a heavy pour of firewhiskey.

22nd of August - Flip the Script

Gender swap, blood status swap, talent swap, personality swap — take a characteristic from one and give it to the other!

23rd of August - Matchmaker, Matchmaker

These two are stubborn, and we all know it. Sometimes all it takes is a little bit of a... push, whether from meddling Marauders or matchmaking mamas.

24th of August - Inspired By...

Write the AU of your dreams! Set as a romcom, inspired by mythology, or staged in medieval times — we welcome it all. Jily in university; as celebrities, cowboys, or vampires; transported into Game of Thrones, The Hunger Games, Percy Jackson, or your favorite story — any AU you can think of, write it! Special shoutout to @maluceh for inspiring this prompt!

25th of August - Continuation Station

That sequel idea that's nagging you? That missing moment from canon or your fic that you're dying to revisit? The prequel to give some fun context to that one-shot? This is your sign to write it!

———

Feel free to message us or drop an ask in our inbox if you have any questions!

Let the games begin...

[chaoticfandomgirly]

The Stupidity of hating on fanon, featuring Jegulus.

Alright folks,

Welcome to another one of my rants because I found out that there are jegulus haters on tumblr. I have not encountered one but I saw it on my mutuals' page and I had some words (a lot of words) to say.

So let's get started...

One of the main complaints is saying that 'James would never fall for Regulus.' Umm...child, do you know what fanfic is? What fanon is? If not let me spell it out for you- it's made up. Something that is not canon and created by fans by employing their imaginations. We are not saying that James would fall for Regulus in canon at all, so please don't come barging in with your opinions. So yes, we don't really care about canon anyways.

Secondly, the argument of 'Regulus being a terrible person and pureblood supremacist' is really weak. Alright, he was a pureblood supremacist and was involved in terrible things. But do you know what else he was? He was just a 17 year old boy who grew up in an abusive household. A boy who had lost his big brother and had to learn survival at an age too young. He grew up before his time and was so traumatized that he always wanted to please his parents and do as they wish. Regulus was just another victim and he also was the one who ended up being the catalyst to Voldemort's defeat. As someone who studies psychology, viewing a person on the surface is the biggest sign of ignorance and it really shows. As for 'being terrible' then let's not forget that canon James wasn't all sunshine and rainbows either. He improved ofc, but he was still an asshole when he was young. Also, we really don't have enough background on canon Regulus to place him in one box. I love that some people want to believe him as good and fill in the blanks by writing something redeeming.

Then comes the 'it's a misogynistic ship'. Now, I won't argue it fully because I do think there are some people out there who don't like Jily bc they hate Lily. But, from what I've seen majority shippers ship both of them interchangeably or in a polyarmorous sense too. In fact, most jegulus shippers are also Marylily and pandalily shippers too. I really can't see anything misogynistic in it. I've actually read some great fics where Lily is a strong independent woman who is fierce and an overall queen.

And, if the 'canon' of it bothers you too much, then you should check out early Jegulus fics like Choices where nothing is sugar-coated. James still ends up with Lily. But in the end, it leaves you thinking and rooting for them anyways. The more new Jegulus fics are on a fluffier side but that fluff came in after bearing the pain of the full of angst fics like Choices.

Another thing should be noted is that these characters are also a big part of queer community. I've seen so many fans exploring themselves through these characters. Like Regulus as Trans is becoming a popular headcanon and it shows that through creative expression people are finding a safe place to explore. And if you're a bigot then...that is frankly a you problem. One I, or jegulus fans, don't want any part of.

In the end, my motive is not to convince you of shipping these two. It clearly started as a crackship, one even I stumbled upon accidentally. But the fandom has made it into something really beautiful and I think instead of spreading hate we should accept it. There are more problematic pairings to be concerned about, trust me. This one is the least of them all.

Thank you for listening to my rant. And if you have anything negative to say, kindly don't because it would just be proof of your own stupidness. There is no point you can argue about with anything substantial. Because in the end it's fanon. Let fans do what they want and if you don't like it then ignore. No one is forcing it on you.

@corwnvus I hope this covers it all. Also, I love your art. Did I mention that, already?

[slitheringghost]

Could you expand on the James was implied to be abusive?

So, to clarify, everything in this meta isn’t necessarily my interpretation. Some of it is, but some is in fact the opposite of my own interpretation (esp. re: Snape). But I’m going for a Doylist lens for once and trying to unweave what JKR was trying to do. This isn't normally how I analyze the text - but it's helpful to know so people can develop a more informed version of their interpretations.

I think JKR intended Jily as, at best, a dysfunctional marriage where they weren’t truly in love, and at worst, an abusive one. I’ve seen speculations that JKR based James on her abusive ex-husband - I’m not sure where that comes from or is true, it might be entirely made up, but I’m mentioning it here.

1.0 In Photographs

Photographs are regularly used in canon to show family estrangement and rejection, and in this section I'll demonstrate how they're used for the same purpose with James and Lily.

To start off, we see James and Lily in the Mirror of Erised, standing next to each other - but remember what the inscription on the frame means (I show not your face but your heart's desire), and what Dumbledore says:

[...] he noticed that she was crying; smiling, but crying at the same time. The tall, thin, black-haired man standing next to her put his arm around her.

“It shows us nothing more or less than the deepest, most desperate desire of our hearts. [...] However, this mirror will give us neither knowledge or truth. Men have wasted away before it, entranced by what they have seen, or been driven mad, not knowing if what it shows is real or even possible." (PS)

What we'll realize via a close analysis is that the image of James and Lily in the Mirror of Erised standing next to each other is exactly what Dumbledore says - it’s only Harry’s heart’s desire, it isn’t the truth. That Dumbledore’s words about the Mirror not being real isn’t just about James and Lily being dead, but the hidden meaning is that it also refers to James and Lily’s marriage.

Next, we get James and Lily's wedding photo, and in that photo James and Lily are standing arm-in-arm, according to Harry's POV Lily looks "alight with happiness", and Lily's also standing next to Sirius. So temporarily, in that snapshot, the image in the Mirror of Erised seems like it's still the truth.

But then we get to the Order photo in OoTP, the book Harry's meant to shed his idealization of his father:

“That’s Dumbledore’s brother, Aberforth, only time I ever met him, strange bloke... That’s Dorcas Meadowes, Voldemort killed her personally... Sirius, when he still had short hair... and... there you go, thought that would interest you!” Harry’s heart turned over. His mother and father were beaming up at him, sitting on either side of a small, watery-eyed man Harry recognized at once as Wormtail: He was the one who had betrayed their whereabouts to Voldemort and so helped bring about their deaths. (OoTP)

Most notably, James and Lily aren't next to each other, because Wormtail sits between them.

Note that Dumbledore is also standing apart from Elphias Doge and Aberforth, hinting at the way he keeps emotional distance from his friends with the former and family estrangement in the latter, and Remus is similarly standing apart from his friends - and just as important is where Lily is standing. Also note that the other married couple, Alice and Frank, are implied to be standing next to each other.

This is our first clue that what Harry sees in the Mirror of Erised and in the wedding photo is at least a partial lie.

Then, in DH, Lily sends Sirius a picture of herself and Harry - with her husband out of frame, to the point that Harry initially can’t even tell for sure it’s James in that photo:

A black-haired baby was zooming in and out of the picture on a tiny broom, roaring with laughter, and a pair of legs that must have belonged to James was chasing after him […] (DH) Then he ripped in two the photograph he was also holding, so that he kept the part from which Lily laughed, throwing the portion showing James and Harry back onto the floor, under the chest of drawers (DH)

Very like the following quotes and examples:

Only the photographs on the mantelpiece really showed how much time had passed. Ten years ago, there had been lots of pictures of what looked like a large pink beach ball wearing different-colored bonnets — but Dudley Dursley was no longer a baby, and now the photographs showed a large blond boy riding his first bicycle, on a carousel at the fair, playing a computer game with his father, being hugged and kissed by his mother. The room held no sign at all that another boy lived in the house, too. (PS) He couldn’t remember his parents at all. His aunt and uncle never spoke about them, and of course he was forbidden to ask questions. There were no photographs of them in the house. (PS) A photograph of the Weasley family stood beside the in-tray. Harry noticed that Percy appeared to have walked out of it. (OoTP) The china, which bore the Black crest and motto, was all thrown unceremoniously into a sack by Sirius, and the same fate met a set of old photographs in tarnished silver frames, all of whose occupants squealed shrilly as the glass covering them smashed. he had also managed to retrieve the silver-framed family photographs that Sirius had thrown away over the summer. Their glass might be shattered, but still the little black-and-white people inside them peered haughtily up at him, including — he felt a little jolt in his stomach — the dark, heavy-lidded woman whose trial he had witnessed in Dumbledore’s Pensieve: Bellatrix Lestrange. By the looks of it, hers was Kreacher’s favorite photograph; he had placed it to the fore of all the others (OoTP) The old man’s eyes traveled to the painting of the girl over the mantelpiece. It was, now Harry looked around properly, the only picture in the room. There was no photograph of Albus Dumbledore, nor of anyone else. (DH)

As displayed above, OoTP in particular introduces many estrangements: Percy's from his family, Sirius's from his family, Aberforth making his first appearance and hinting at his conflict with his brother, and of course the continuous emphasis on Petunia's estrangement from Lily, and all of these are emphasized via photographs... as is Jily's estrangement.

The comparison to the Dumbledores is probably the most apt - Aberforth and Albus both talk of Ariana very lovingly while being estranged from each other, similar to how Lily talks of Harry in her letter while there being minimal references to her relationship with James by itself.

Additionally, right before Harry reaches Lily's letter and the photograph with her and Harry, he views the photo of the Marauders on Sirius's bedroom wall and muses on the group's specific dynamics, and then thinks “or was it simply because Harry knew how it had been, that he saw these things in the picture?”

But the thing is, Harry can't see the truth in the picture Lily sends Sirius, that it's a sign of an broken marriage with James - because he doesn't know how it had been with Lily, will never know, and accepting that is meant to be part of his acceptance of death. (Worth noting that JKR wrote HP while her own mother was dying/after her death).

To summarize, Jily get farther and farther away from each other in these snapshots - they go from first standing next to each other, to standing apart in the Order photo, to not standing together again in the photograph Lily sends to Sirius - because James isn't in the photo at all.

Of course, the evidence here is circumstantial - I'm not going to make a judgment on i.e. Sirius and James's closeness by them not standing together in that or the wedding photo (Sirius and Lily standing together in both on the other hand…).

But since James and Lily are explicitly stated as standing next to each other in the Mirror of Erised, and the narrative goes out of its way to point out they aren't standing beside each other in that photograph in the same book you get stuff like "Lily loathed James and maybe James forced her to marry him", I assume it's significant, especially given the Mirror of Erised explicitly comes up several times in OoTP itself:

A great black dragon was rearing in front of him… His father and mother were waving at him out of an enchanted mirror (OoTP) He remembered seeing his dead parents in the Mirror of Erised four years ago. He was going to be able to talk to Sirius again, right now, he knew it — (OoTP)

2.0 Lily as The Golden Snitch

A very, very important point is that James doodling Lily’s initials with the Snitch was never meant to be romantic - because the hidden, true meaning of this is that Lily is represented by the Snitch and James playing with the Snitch represents James and Lily’s relationship:

Harry stared at Wormtail for a moment, then back at James, who was now doodling on a bit of scrap parchment. He had drawn a Snitch and was now tracing the letters L. E. What did they stand for? “Me too,” said James. He put his hand in his pocket and took out a struggling Golden Snitch. “Where’d you get that?” “Nicked it,” said James casually. He started playing with the Snitch, allowing it to fly as much as a foot away and seizing it again; his reflexes were excellent. Wormtail watched him in awe. [...] James was still playing with the Snitch, letting it zoom farther and farther away, almost escaping but always grabbed at the last second. Wormtail was watching him with his mouth open. Every time James made a particularly difficult catch, Wormtail gasped and applauded. After five minutes of this, Harry wondered why James didn’t tell Wormtail to get a grip on himself, but James seemed to be enjoying the attention. Harry noticed his father had a habit of rumpling up his hair as though to make sure it did not get too tidy, and also that he kept looking over at the girls by the water’s edge. “Put that away, will you?” said Sirius finally, as James made a fine catch and Wormtail let out a cheer. “Before Wormtail wets himself from excitement.” Wormtail turned slightly pink but James grinned. “If it bothers you,” he said, stuffing the Snitch back in his pocket. (OoTP)

Lily is the one James “nicked” aka stole, the one struggling against him, the one trying to escape but being grabbed at the last second by James AKA James finally managing to go out with Lily 7th year AKA James making a “particularly difficult catch”.

Lily as symbolized by the Golden Snitch is a really important part of canon that encompasses the whole text, not just SWM, and I promise I have a lot more evidence on that thread, but I'm writing a separate meta regarding that. (For now note that - Lily is the Snitch and Harry is the Seeker, because Lily’s playing hide-and-seek with him throughout the narrative and Harry has to seek her. Try doing Ctrl+ F + Snitch in OoTP and DH and see if you can spot patterns/hidden allusions to Lily).

3.0 My Analysis on SWM

(This section is most directly my personal thoughts)

It starts off with James attacking Snape specifically to get her attention, or at least, that's one of the reasons (“Snape lay panting on the ground. James and Sirius advanced on him, wands up, James glancing over his shoulder at the girls at the water’s edge as he went”). This is already a red flag. To clarify, in the context of the war and the atmosphere at Hogwarts, imo James attacking Snape even when Lily happens to be nearby isn't the issue, but doing something he knows upsets her specifically to get her attention is.

Second, he asks her out publicly, in front of a literal crowd. This is another red flag. This also goes back to him the imagery of him showing off with the Snitch - a.k.a showing off with Lily, liking the attention of others when he tries to "catch" her.

And the biggest red flag - blackmailing her with "I'll stop hurting Snape if you go out with me".

Now, I will say that it's questionable whether he 100% meant it or if it was a spur of the moment thing. I say this because when she says no, in a pretty dramatic and cutting way no less, he doesn't seem upset specifically by that. He just sort of moves on. (What he is upset by and his reaction to it, I'll get to in a bit). That said, if Lily had actually said yes, and they had had sex, that would've been rape.

Whether James asked her out repeatedly / harassed her, idk, I think it could go either way, from Sirius's words and SWM overall it is at least clear James making his interest in her known in showy and obnoxious ways even if he didn't directly ask her out before, despite her making her disinterest in him known just as much. But the way he asked her out in this scene is bad enough, even if it was just once.

Then James continues to call after her despite her speech making it clear she’s very infuriated and very not into him.

Then James doesn’t get why she’s upset at his behavior and goes “what is it with her” (putting the blame on her for her reaction) and then is so enraged by her rejection that he escalates his attack on Snape. This does not have great implications for what he’d do to Lily at other times when she similarly does something he doesn’t like.

As for Lily’s reaction in the scene, I think every word frankly speaks for itself regarding how much she dislikes James.

Lily compares going out with James to dating an animal at the bottom of the lake - this evokes the idea that dating James is equivalent to “drowning in despair”.

Also see how affectionately she talks about Harry's flight vs. the words about James (and this is a particularly sick burn towards James given Lily has been able to fly unsupported since she was 9 years old and Snape can probably fly unsupported by then too - Lily truly does NOT like this man).

“Messing up your hair because you think it looks cool to look like you’ve just got off your broomstick, showing off with that stupid Snitch, walking down corridors and hexing anyone who annoys you just because you can — I’m surprised your broomstick can get off the ground with that fat head on it. You make me SICK.” (OoTP) Thank you thank you, for Harry’s birthday present! It was his favorite by far. One year old and already zooming along on a toy broomstick, he looked so pleased with himself, I’m enclosing a picture so you can see. You know it only rises about two feet off the ground, but he nearly killed the cat and he smashed a horrible vase Petunia sent me for Christmas (DH)

“She turned on her heel and hurried away.” - Lily is hurrying away from James, she’s running away from him, she’s the Snitch trying to escape from him.

4.0 Harry's reflections

Harry muses on the Marauders' attack on Snape, and then we have these paragraphs right after it:

Harry reminded himself that Lily had intervened; his mother had been decent, yet the memory of the look on her face as she had shouted at James disturbed him quite as much as anything else. She had clearly loathed James and Harry simply could not understand how they could have ended up married. Once or twice he even wondered whether James had forced her into it... (OoTP)

To reiterate - Harry was just as disturbed by James’s treatment of Lily and Lily’s loathing of him as he was by the extreme violence towards Snape in that scene. The text clearly puts those things on the same level and on par with each other here.

And to reiterate again, JKR… literally had Harry wonder if James FORCED Lily to marry him. There was zero reason for JKR to include this if Jily was ever meant to be read positively. This isn't a "cute hate to love" type of framing, JKR clearly framed Jily as disturbing. The idea of James potentially forcing her, Lily literally saying she wouldn't go out with him if it was a choice between him and the Squid - the language here is consistently of force, of lack of choice.

Then Harry's misery about the violence towards Snape is again linked to his misery about James and Lily:

For nearly five years the thought of his father had been a source of comfort, of inspiration. Whenever someone had told him he was like James he had glowed with pride inside. And now... now he felt cold and miserable at the thought of him. (OoTP) “How come she married him?” Harry asked miserably. “She hated him!” (OoTP)

The descriptions of the struggling Golden Snitch a.k.a. Lily trying to escape from James is also likened to Snape struggling to escape from the Marauders' attack on him:

He put his hand in his pocket and took out a struggling Golden Snitch. Snape was trying to get up, but the jinx was still operating on him; he was struggling, as though bound by invisible ropes. “There you go,” he said, as Snape struggled to his feet again, “you’re lucky Evans was here, Snivellus —” (OoTP)

And another hint JKR might've put in is James greeting them both similarly ("All right, Snivellus?" and "All right, Evans?"). Now, regarding Harry's conversation with Sirius and Remus:

“If we were sometimes arrogant little berks, you mean,” said Sirius. Lupin smiled. "He kept messing up his hair,” said Harry in a pained voice. Sirius and Lupin laughed. “I’d forgotten he used to do that,” said Sirius affectionately. “Was he playing with the Snitch?” said Lupin eagerly. “Yeah,” said Harry, watching uncomprehendingly as Sirius and Lupin beamed reminiscently. “Well... I thought he was a bit of an idiot.” “Of course he was a bit of an idiot!” said Sirius bracingly. “We were all idiots! Well — not Moony so much,” he said fairly (OoTP)

Notice the language here when they talk about James in the memory - Sirius and Remus are smiling, they’re laughing, they’re affectionate, they're speaking of him eagerly, they’re beaming reminiscently - even at the stuff that i.e. Sirius was annoyed by in the actual memory (James showing off with the Snitch, etc). You can even feel the affection in Sirius going "we were all idiots <3”.

But then we get to the topic of James and Lily, and that totally and completely ends:

“And,” said Harry doggedly, determined to say everything that was on his mind now he was here, “he kept looking over at the girls by the lake, hoping they were watching him!” “Oh, well, he always made a fool of himself whenever Lily was around,” said Sirius, shrugging. “He couldn’t stop himself showing off whenever he got near her.” “How come she married him?” Harry asked miserably. “She hated him!” “Nah, she didn’t,” said Sirius. “She started going out with him in seventh year,” said Lupin. “Once James had deflated his head a bit,” said Sirius. “And stopped hexing people just for the fun of it,” said Lupin. (OoTP)

They are not effusive at all. Sirius in fact sounds just as unimpressed and critical of James as he sounded in the actual memory. (“Bad luck, Prongs”, “Reading between the lines, I’d say she thinks you’re a bit conceited, mate”, the double meaning of Sirius telling James to put the Snitch away).

Sirius emphasizes James showing off for Lily and trying to get her attention and "making a fool of himself" (again, not positive wording), and it’s only when Harry brings up Lily seeming to hate him that Lily’s feelings are addressed at all, and all Sirius says is “nah she didn’t hate him”, never saying she liked or loved him and painting it as very one-sided.

This text uses the word “love” very, very intentionally - and it’s never once used for Lily’s feelings towards James (or even vice versa, frankly).

And in this conversation, the emphasis here quickly goes to the fact that James broke his promise to Lily (sort of evoking a broken wedding vow, etc):

“You think you’re funny,” she said coldly. “But you’re just an arrogant, bullying toerag, Potter. Leave him alone.” “I will if you go out with me, Evans,” said James quickly. “Go on... Go out with me, and I’ll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again.” (OoTP) “Even Snape?” said Harry. “Well,” said Lupin slowly, “Snape was a special case. I mean, he never lost an opportunity to curse James, so you couldn’t really expect James to take that lying down, could you?” “And my mum was okay with that?” “She didn’t know too much about it, to tell you the truth,” said Sirius. “I mean, James didn’t take Snape on dates with her and jinx him in front of her, did he?” (OoTP)

Again the language here, it's clearly making an intentional reference to James's "promise/agreement" to never attack Snape if Lily goes out on a date with him.

This is likened to Voldemort's broken promise to Lily - Lily says "Leave him alone" three times before James says "I will if you go out with me", just as Lily offers her own life for Harry's three times (take me, kill me instead, I'll do anything) and says Not Harry seven times and Voldemort seals the agreement by taking Lily’s life, and then “breaks that promise” whenever he tries to kill Harry (Voldemort's broken promise to Lily is brought up many times specifically in OoTP in coded language, part of why the parallel seems intentional, but I’ll get to that in other metas).

To clarify, I don’t think James did anything wrong there - certainly by 7th year Snape would’ve been a marked Death Eater who already murdered people, I’m just pointing out what the text is trying to do here.

5.0 Some comparisons

5.1 Wearing masks with each other

It's emphasized that Sirius is the one James stops showing off for, not Lily, and that James's hair is different and voice is different when he speaks to Lily - basically, that James is wearing a mask with Lily:

Harry had the distinct impression that Sirius was the only one for whom James would have stopped showing off. “Leave him ALONE!” James and Sirius looked around. James’s free hand jumped to his hair again. “All right, Evans?” said James, and the tone of his voice was suddenly pleasant, deeper, more mature. (OoTP)

Again, none of this is positive framing for Jily. In comparison, in the Prince's Tale we have Snape taking off his long coat and is comfortable wearing his mother's clothes in front of Lily. In other words, unlike James who puts on a mask with her, Snape is taking the mask off with Lily.

And as James wears a mask with Lily, Lily wears a mask with him, because in the death scene memory, her face is covered by her long hair while she speaks to James, vs. the Lily from the Resurrection Stone who pushes her hair back to look at Harry.

This is Lily setting the terms of who is and isn't allowed to see her - because similarly, she's letting Sirius see her face (I'm enclosing a picture so you can see - the picture which not only includes Harry but also Lily herself laughing), she's repeatedly described as smiling at Snape, and of course she's letting Harry see her face, yet with James, we have these passages:

“Evans!” James shouted after her, “Hey, EVANS!” But she didn’t look back. (OoTP) his mother had been decent, yet the memory of the look on her face as she had shouted at James disturbed him quite as much as anything else (OoTP) A door opened and the mother entered, saying words he could not hear, her long dark-red hair falling over her face. Now the father scooped up the son and handed him to the mother. (DH)

In direct contrast to:

Harry heard Snape let out a tiny groan. Lily took off the hat, handed it back to Professor McGonagall, then hurried toward the cheering Gryffindors, but as she went she glanced back at Snape, and there was a sad little smile on her face. (DH) “Your mother’s coming…” he said quietly. “She wants to see you… it will be all right… hold on…” (GoF) One year old and already zooming along on a toy broomstick, he looked so pleased with himself, I’m enclosing a picture so you can see. (DH) but we've had to pack away all the ornaments and make sure we don't take our eyes off him when he gets going. (DH) Lily’s smile was widest of all. She pushed her long hair back as she drew close to him, and her green eyes, so like his, searched his face hungrily, as though she would never be able to look at him enough. (DH)

This is especially notable given the obvious significance of Lily's eyes and Lily's gaze as a "window to her soul" and most reflective of her true emotions.

This is echoed in the only true James and Lily emphasis in The Prince’s Tale being that of James not paying attention to Lily:

One of the boys sharing the compartment, who had shown no interest at all in Lily or Snape until that point, looked around at the word, and Harry, whose attention had been focused entirely on the two beside the window, saw his father (DH)

Again, James is 11, this is totally understandable and in fact it’d be weird if he was interested in Lily since he was 11, but I’m just pointing out how the language around James and Lily is consistently negative.

5.2 The Bloody Baron

“She sent a man who had long loved me, though I spurned his advances, to find me. She knew that he would not rest until he had done so." Harry waited. She drew a deep breath and threw back her head. “He tracked me to the forest where I was hiding. When I refused to return with him, he became violent. The Baron was always a hot-tempered man. Furious at my refusal, jealous of my freedom, he stabbed me.” (DH) “What is it with her?” said James, trying and failing to look as though this was a throwaway question of no real importance to him. “Reading between the lines, I’d say she thinks you’re a bit conceited, mate,” said Sirius. “Right,” said James, who looked furious now, “right —” There was another flash of light, and Snape was once again hanging upside down in the air. “Who wants to see me take off Snivelly’s pants?” (OoTP)

A note on patronuses and extracanon statements

I'm aware JKR has said Lily was attracted to James in SWM in extracanon, and has framed Jily's patronuses positively in relation to each other. However, these statements was years after the books were published - and it's clear JKR often changes her opinions about her characters and dynamics very often i.e. the way she framed Ron and Sirius in the early books vs the later books, so it's likely something similar happened with Jily in the other direction.

In the actual books, the doe patronus is only ever shown and discussed to emphasize Snape and Lily’s bond, it’s never discussed in relation to James and Lily. The stag patronus is firmly about Harry’s connection with his father.

As for the argument that Lily noticing James showing off with the Snitch signifies she’s into him - if some boy is constantly trying to get your attention and being obnoxious about it, you’d be hyper aware of his presence regardless if you were attracted to him. Snape is also hyper aware of the Marauders, Sirius was likewise watching Snape, etc. There is, of course the blush in her conversation with Snape - I'll get to that in a separate meta.

This is another meta about Jily as potentially abusive, I don’t agree with all of it but it’s worth reading.

[ellecdc]

is there a guide to what couples are named what? for instance, moonwater is regulus and remus? but then what is sirius and remus called? i’m sorry if you’ve answered this before!

No worries babe! I can break down the ships I write for and maybe some side pairings I’m familiar with/sometimes reference in my writings!

Basically, if you see anything involving a moon or wolf, it’s likely going to be Remus. If you see a star mentioned it’ll be either Black brother, anything to do with a sun or chaser with be James (sun incarnate, gryffindor chaser), flowers are usually Lily with the exception of one*, killer is always barty (even though the only person he ever killed was his abuser/father), a rose will be Evan (Rosier), or you’ll see a mashup of first or last names

Remus & Sirius = Wolfstar

Remus & James = MoonChaser

Remus and Regulus = moonwater

James & Regulus = usually referred to as Jegulus but aka Sunseeker or starchaser (regulus was the Slytherin seeker)

James and Sirius = usually referred to as prongsfoot but sometimes seen as starbucks or bambibelle

Lily & James = jily

Barty & Regulus = bartylus or starkiller

Barty & Evan = rosekiller

Regulus, Barty, Evan = starosekiller

Barty & Sirius = i refer to them as deathstar but most refer to them as bitchkiller

Remus, Regulus, Barty = moonwaterkiller

Lily & Remus = moonflower

Lily & Pandora = pandalily

Lily & Mary = marylily

Marlene & Dorcas = dorlene

Sirius & Marlene = blackinnon

Alice & Narcissa = nobleflower* (I think this is because the name Alice means noble and narcissus is a flower?)

[kay-elle-cee]

In Search of Something More || Read Chapter 2 on Ao3 A Jily Regency AU || 6.4K Words || Rated M || Playlist

In the sunlit garden of her sister’s home, Lord Potter had promised Lily a life of her own design, with minimal expectations—her presence at community events, companionship, and an heir. As the two stumble into the routine of marriage and work to make a life together at Stinchcombe Hall, unsolicited feelings provoke each to start wondering if this is merely a marriage…or if it could be something more.

A continuation of this Jilytober entry.

Chapter 2: Stinchcombe Hall

When Lily wakes, it’s with a stretch of her arms out to the side and a gentle flutter of her eyes as she blinks the remnants of sleep away. Once they open and adjust to the room around her, she freezes. This bed is too large, the sheets too nice, the air too cold. Not to mention the size of the room itself and all of its intricate furnishings. It takes her a moment to place herself, her thumb rubbing over the golden band on her left hand. That’s right, she thinks, Stinchcombe Hall. No more Dursleys. Her muscles relax and she sinks into the large bed—her bed, she thinks almost giddily—content to just lie there for an extra few minutes before coming face-to-face with the reality of her new life. Never in her wildest dreams would she have thought herself a Countess. She was never one to dream of grandeur or strive for connections like her sister. Lily always imagined she’d marry decently, perhaps a gentleman who would court her during her season or even someone who worked in town. Honestly, she had never minded the thought of remaining perfectly average, as long as she was arguably happy. But Countess? 

[ro-is-struggling]

Drunken Confessions || Sirius Black x Reader {Marauders Era}

Summary: You and Sirius always had feelings for each other but you kept it a secret because you two didn't get along. That is until you start dating an exchange student from Ilvermorny. Sirius can't stand seeing you two together all the time so one day he decides he's had enough and confesses his feelings to you under the influence of alcohol.

Warnings: angst (with happy ending), slow burn, unrequited love (but actually mutual pining), kinda enemies to lovers, cheating I guess (the reader is in love with Sirius while dating another guy), mentions of Snape being a jerk to the reader and Lily for being muggleborns, mentions of Jily, Modern AU (so they can have phones to make the prompt make sense), love confessions, fluff, Fem!Gryffindor!Reader

English is not my first language

Word count: 6500

Notes: Basen on a request with the prompt 7 from my 600 Followers Celebration Prompt List

Sirius was watching you from his place at the Gryffindor table lost in thought. You were with him again. Ever since the Ilvermorny exchange students had arrived you hadn't left the side of this Ben guy and he couldn't take it anymore. Everywhere you went he was by your side, holding your hand, carrying your books, lending you his jacket when you got cold... doing all the things he wanted to do for you.

He knew that was impossible, you hated him and barely spoke to him in class, but his dreams didn't hurt anyone. Sirius knew you were polar opposites. You were introverted, quiet, rule-abiding, and popular for your kindness and general cheerfulness, the exact opposite of all the things his name was known for at school. You had never gotten along very well for those reasons, you always saw him as an incompetent buffoon —and you being friends with Snape didn't help his case—, but he had a crush on you from the first moment he saw you. And as much as he knew that a relationship between you was as likely to happen as Snape becoming funny, Sirius couldn't help but feel his insides bubbling with jealousy every time this Ben guy touched you. 

From what Sirius had heard, he was an old friend of yours who you hadn't seen for years after he moved back to America with his family. You were thrilled to have the opportunity to spend time with him after so long and it showed in the amount of time you spent together. Sirius could swear that there wasn't a moment of the day when he looked at you and Ben wasn't standing next to you. But no matter how much you insisted that you were just friends, he knew that was a lie. There was more than friendship in your eyes when you looked at each other and he hated it. 

He hated it because it meant he truly didn't have a chance with you. You weren't someone who enjoyed casual dating, so if you were in a relationship with Ben like he assumed that meant you really loved him. You were in love with Ben and Sirius could do nothing but admire your happiness from a distance while the bitterness of loneliness consumed his insides.

Of course he was never really alone, but none of the girls he dated from time to time compared to you. You were something special, a girl of singular beauty, the calm his troubled soul so desperately needed. But you were unobtainable for someone like him, so he had to learn to live with the knowledge that he could never hold your hand or feel your lips on his, something that became more difficult when he saw you walking through the halls of Hogwarts with Ben, knowing that he had everything he longed for. Sometimes Sirius wished he had never met you, he was sure that would be easier than forgetting you. 

"Are you ready, Black?" your voice snapped him out of his thoughts, forcing him back to reality. At some point you had approached him without him even noticing, looking at him with a raised eyebrow as you waited for him to react. He saw that you were carrying your potions book, holding it tightly against your chest, and then remembered that you had agreed to get together after class to work on a project you had been assigned - he still couldn't believe how unlucky he was to end up paired with you of all people. 

"Yeah, let's go" he muttered without paying much attention to his surroundings, getting up from the table and leaving his half-eaten plate of food behind.

It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining brightly in the sky, though it wasn't too hot thanks to the gentle breeze rustling the treetops. You wanted to take advantage of the nice weather, so you suggested going to the courtyard to work. Sirius agreed, thinking that the fresh air would help him stay calm by not being locked in a room with the sweet scent of your perfume attacking his nostrils. 

The potion you had to brew for Friday's class was a bit more complicated than you both expected. It had a long list of steps and instructions that had to be strictly followed for the final preparation to be perfect —like cutting the ingredients in a specific way and adding them at a specific time. It took you several attempts to come up with a potion that was decent even though you two were top Gryffindor students. And even after spending all afternoon working on it, you still weren't finished. There were still a couple of things to do before you could let the concoction rest for 24 hours as the recipe indicated and the sun was starting to set.

"It's getting late," you muttered as you threw some herbs into the mixture. Sirius was stirring the cauldron with a blank stare, lost in thought. It was something you noticed him doing a lot lately. You wondered what it was that could have him so distracted, though you couldn't bring yourself to ask him. You weren't the kind of people who talked without ending up fighting. "Do you think we'll ever finish this thing?" you joked to lighten the mood.

"Slughorn better give us a good grade after this."Sirius let out a chuckle, looking up to meet your gaze. 

"I hope so! Or I'll force it down his throat myself."

"I'll hold him down for you," he laughed, sparking a warm feeling inside you. You liked his laughter and knowing that you were the cause of it gave you a strange sense of pride. Not everyone could make the class clown laugh.

"I miss when Severus did all the work for me," you complained, grabbing the next ingredient for the potion. You, Lily and him used to do all the projects you could together, especially the potions ones. Severus was very good at the subject and far too controlling so most of the time he ended up doing everything himself because he couldn't stand it if you got something wrong. You didn't mind though, you liked learning through him, he was kind of grumpy but he was a good teacher when he wanted to be.

"Is it really bad between you, huh?" Sirius spoke in a soft tone, as if he was genuinely concerned about the big fight you'd had with one of your best friends. You were surprised by his interest given that he was the #1 Snape hater. You expected a sarcastic comment from him or a mocking remark, but instead he seemed genuinely interested in hearing you talk about your problems. It was kind of weird, you guys didn't usually share those kinds of moments, but you decided to give him a chance.

"Yeah, Lily and I are pretty sad about it, but we couldn't keep pretending... Severus changed, he's not the same guy I met on the train five years ago" you murmured, your voice muffled by sadness. It was hard to lose a friend and even harder to lose one the way you and Lily had lost Severus. The way he had treated you, the names he had called you, no friend would ever be able to be so cruel. "Or maybe he's more himself, I don't know anymore... I feel like I don't know him anymore. Maybe I never did."

Sirius felt pure hatred coursing through his veins as he saw the sadness in your eyes. He wanted to kill Snape for daring to make you suffer by calling you that derogatory word. He always knew Snivellus was an idiot, but he had outdone himself by hurting you and Lily like that. You were two of the sweetest, kindest people he had ever met and Snape had been lucky enough to call you his friends. Sirius couldn't believe how he had been such an idiot to lose you two when you were the best thing that had ever happened to him in his miserable, boring life. He would regret that for the rest of his days, Sirius was sure of it.

"I'm sorry," Sirius said with sincerity in his voice. The hand that wasn't stirring the cauldron hovered over yours for a few seconds, trying to decide whether it was appropriate to touch you or not. 

You weren't friends so physical contact was a rare thing for you. You didn't even hug occasionally to celebrate Gryffindor's victory in a Quidditch match —in fact, you were lucky if you talked for more than five minutes without arguing—, so he wasn't sure how you would react. But on second thought, you also didn't share intimate moments like this one, filled with meaningful words about your feelings, so he decided to give it a shot.

You looked up to stare at him when you felt the warmth of his hand on yours. The contact awakened a wave of electricity in your body, the skin on your hand tingling under his touch. It was something you had never felt before and it did nothing but raise doubts and confusion in your mind. 

"I mean, I know Snape and I have our differences and I don't like him, but still I'm sorry about what happened. He was your friend and it sucks that everything ended this way." You were surprised by the kindness in Sirius' voice. He sounded genuinely sorry for what had happened and not at all smug at being the one who had warned you of his bad side all these years. Was this a sign that he was finally maturing? 

"Yeah, I'm sorry too," you sighed, shrugging. "But you're not the one that should be apologizing. I mean, you warned me about him, I just... I couldn't see it. I didn't want to see it. It kinda sucks to learn that your friend hates you for being born, I guess."

"You shouldn't listen to him. Having Lily and you as friends was the best thing that could have happened to him and he's a fucking idiot for not seeing that." Sirius tightened his grip on your hand as a sign of support and you smiled at him, feeling the warmth invade your insides once more. It was a comfortable warmth, a feeling that made you feel safe.

"You're a brilliant witch and you should never let anyone tell you otherwise."

"Thank you, Sirius. I kinda needed to hear that." After all you had been through —having to listen to someone so close to you belittle you for being a Muggle-born wizard— you had fallen into the trap of doubting your abilities. But hearing a wizard as talented as Sirius praise you like that made you feel better. "Look at us! Who would have thought that we were capable of having a normal conversation?" you laughed and he followed suit.

"It's what I've been trying to tell you all these years!" You shared a laugh that felt all too genuine. For the first time since you had known each other you were having a good time together. However, the fun was interrupted by Ben's voice calling your name in the distance.

“There you are! I've been looking for you all day,” he said with an innocent smile. You removed your hand from under Sirius' quickly, a gesture that didn't go unnoticed by either boy. 

"I'm sorry! We're doing our potions homework and it is taking a bit longer than we thought it would" you explained to Ben, suddenly nervous. You had nothing to hide, you and Sirius were just doing your homework, so why was your stomach turning with nervousness? "We're almost done with the first part, so you can stay with us if you want" you offered. Ben was about to sit down with you, when Sirius' voice interrupted him.

"There's no need, I can finish the rest by myself," he assured you, trying hard to hide the bitterness in his voice. The last thing he wanted at that moment was to share space with Ben. You'd had such a nice evening, he'd rather take that and not have to put up with your public displays of affection. 

"Are you sure? I can help you. I mean, I want to. It's our project." You found it strange the way Sirius suddenly seemed to want to get rid of you. You thought you were having a good time together.

"Yes it's fine! Go have fun and I'll see you tomorrow after class to finish it."

You wanted to say something, to insist on staying to help him, but he seemed very determined to finish the first part of the preparation alone so you just nodded. You rose from your place and waved him goodbye, agreeing on a time to meet tomorrow before taking Ben's hand and walking towards the castle. As you walked away you couldn't help but wonder if you had done something wrong to make him angry. Though what stood out the most to you was how much his rejection seemed to affect you.

The potions class the next day only stirred up more confusion within you, not because of the project - Professor Slughorn told you that you were on the right track when you showed him the state of your potion - but because of your feelings for Sirius. Among other potions of advanced difficulty, Professor Slughorn introduced the class to Amortentia, the most powerful love potion in existence. Everyone crowded around the professor's desk where the cauldron of steaming liquid rested, desperate to smell the steam rising in spirals and discover the scent of love. All except Lily and you, who stayed at the back of the room and only approached when the rest of the class began to disperse. 

There was something about the promise of discovering smells that attracted you even if you didn't know it that terrified you. You both knew very well what you might encounter because no matter how hard you tried to hide it, the feelings were there, but you didn't want to be confronted with the obvious confirmation that the scent of Amortentia would provide. If it were up to you, you would never have gone near that cauldron, but Professor Slughorn invited you when he saw that you were not moving and you could not refuse. So, letting out a sigh, you approached the desk and reluctantly smelled the potion.

The first aroma that attacked your nostrils was that of freshly brewed coffee, the only thing that could get you out of bed on cold mornings. Then the coffee morphed into the smell of parchment and old books that flooded the school library, where you spent most of your afternoons doing your homework. It was a scent you had come to love as you associated it with Hogwarts and the wonders of the magical world, a place that had become your second home and that you missed like crazy during the school breaks. 

You were happy with your experience with Amortentia, letting out a sigh of relief as you discovered that it evoked familiar and harmless smells for you, things you already knew you found pleasant. But just as you were walking away from the cauldron, the third smell attacked you. And this time it wasn't as harmless as the others. Far from it, it turned your world upside down.

You wished it was Ben's cologne or even the smell of his shampoo, anything to reassure you that you were doing the right thing by dating him. But the strong smell of musk and cigarettes that assaulted your nose was a loud and clear message: it was Sirius that your heart truly desired.

Lily looked just as horrified as you did when you returned to your seats, and despite the fact that neither of you mentioned the Amortentia for the rest of the day, you didn't have to talk about it to know what had happened. You knew each other well enough to know that the damn potion had only confirmed your greatest fears: you were in love with Sirius and she was in love with James.

Your mood was ruined after that potions class, your mind too preoccupied with finding another explanation for smelling Sirius' very essence in the Amortentia to concentrate on anything else. There was no way you could accept that you were in love with him. No. There had to be another explanation. You couldn't be in love with him. He was arrogant and annoying, always thinking he was smarter and funnier than he actually was. He was the complete opposite of you and there was no way you could be in love with him. Not when you had a kind and wonderful guy who loved and respected you by your side.

Ben was your friend, someone you had shared beautiful moments with. He understood you better than anyone and even though you hadn't seen each other for a couple of years, he hadn't changed at all. You had a special bond that had not faded with the passage of time. You two together made sense. He was probably the most appropriate guy for you in all of Hogwarts. So why couldn't you love him like he loved you?

When you met Sirius at the agreed time and place you immediately noticed that the atmosphere was different from the previous day. Yesterday you had managed to create a pleasant working environment and even ended up sharing an intimate and meaningful moment that you would never have expected to have with him. But today there was nothing but tension in the air as you sat next to him, pulling your potions book out of your backpack to read the recipe for the thousandth time. You both seemed to be in a bad mood and the fact that your phone was ringing every five minutes with messages from Ben didn't help. 

"What's wrong with lover boy today? Can't he see that you're busy?" There was something about the annoyed, sarcastic tone in which Sirius said that that you didn't like. Maybe it was your bad mood exaggerating things, but he had no right to speak to you in that tone. 

"We're going on a date to Hogsmeade today and he's just making sure I remember it, that's all." you said through gritted teeth, thinking you didn't have to explain anything to him. 

"He sent you like a thousand texts already, does he think you're dumb or something?" Sirius couldn't explain what had gotten into him either. He assumed he still hadn't recovered from watching you leave with your boyfriend yesterday while he stayed behind. Having smelled your perfume on the Amortentia didn't help him either, especially since you kept reminding him that you weren't his and never would be. 

"No, he just misses me," you replied reluctantly, rolling your eyes.

You decided not to speak anymore after that in order to keep the peace between you, limiting yourself to opening your mouth only to talk about the potion you were brewing. However, you were both in such a bad mood that you ended up arguing about that as well, further delaying the process and damning yourselves to spend more time together. 

"Do you mind finishing it alone? It's getting late and I have to go get ready." you asked when you saw how late it was getting. You had less than half an hour to get ready for your date and meet the rest of the students going to Hogsmeade or you would miss the trip altogether.

"Actually, I do. This is your project too and I'm not going to do this all by myself." Sirius knew he was being irrational, looking for excuses to force you to stay with him. He didn't care that you were fighting as long as it meant you wouldn't go on your date with Ben. He was being selfish and he wasn't proud of it, but jealousy was getting the better of him.

"What?" The question sounded more like an exclamation of surprise, looking at Sirius with narrowed eyes as you tried to find some indication on his face that he was joking. When you found none, you let out a sigh of disbelief. Yesterday he hadn't hesitated to kick you out and now he was complaining about working alone? It didn't make any sense.

"What the hell is your problem today? Why are you acting like a jerk all of a sudden?"

"I have a problem?" Sirius laughed sarcastically. "And what about your little boyfriend? He's the one who can't seem to leave you alone for five minutes." It was obvious what Sirius' problem was at this point, but you were too annoyed to notice the jealousy in his voice.

"What does he have to do with anything?" Confusion was written all over your face, anger evident in your stiff posture and your arms crossed over your chest. What was his fucking problem?

"Nothing, he's a saint. He never does anything wrong" he muttered between his teeth, as if he was speaking more to himself than to you. But despite his low tone of voice, you heard him with perfect clarity.

"Why do you care so much about him?" You were tired of beating around the bush, you needed answers. You needed to hear him say what he really thought. You needed to know if behind his teasing and sarcastic remarks hid at least a hint of jealousy —if you weren't the only one who felt something.

Your eyes begged him for an honest answer, but Sirius didn't have the courage - or the composure - he needed to give it to you at that moment. "I don't care about him or you," he said instead. "You know what? Go with him, don't keep him waiting. I'll finish this later." 

Without another word, Sirius got up and gathered his things from the table, disappearing behind the door in a matter of seconds. You watched him walk away not knowing what to do or say, feeling the lump in your throat tighten to the point where you found it hard to breathe. 

He didn't care about you.

"Okay, what's wrong with you?" Ben asked you after spending the last five minutes talking without an answer from you. It was obvious something was wrong with you, you had been distracted since you left the castle.

"What?" Looking up from the teacup in front of you, you met your boyfriend's worried gaze and your heart broke a little more. Why did everything have to be so complicated? You were in Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop, the most romantic place in Hogsmeade accompanied by the most wonderful guy in the world and your mind was still thinking about Sirius. "Oh, nothing. I'm a little tired, that's all." You put on a smile, but Ben knew you too well to notice that it wasn't genuine. 

"C'mon! Something is bothering you, what is it?" he insisted and you answered his question immediately, not with words, but with your eyes.

Just as Ben stretched his hand across the table to rest it on yours, your eyes wandered to the store window. Among the people walking through the streets of Hogsmeade you were able to make out Sirius, who was walking by while holding hands with a Hufflepuff girl. Your expression changed immediately, sadness evident in your eyes as you made eye contact with the guy who didn't seem to want to leave your thoughts. He looked at you as he crossed the street, his eyes traveling to where your hand joined Ben's on the table. And then his eyes shifted to the girl laughing next to him, leaning down to give her a kiss on the cheek as they walked past you.

"It's him, isn't it?" Ben's voice managed to get your attention again and you turned to look at him. He knew, you could see it in his eyes. He knew your little secret.

“Huh?”

“Sirius. He’s the one you want.” The certainty in his voice made you feel like the worst human being in the history of mankind. He was sure of what he was saying, he had no doubt that he wasn't the one you really loved. 

"What? No! Sirius and I aren't even friends." You didn't know why you were lying, you knew Ben had figured you out. You supposed it was because you refused to admit your true feelings out loud. Saying it made it real, it stopped being a bunch of doubts and guesses that haunted your mind late at night and became the cruel and painful reality. You were not ready for that. "I have you, why would I want to be with anyone else?"

"I see the way you look at him when you think nobody is watching you." Ben stated and the smile on your face vanished. "If he's the one you truly want, then you should be with him."

"A relationship between us would never work, we are not compatible." You tried to sound casual, to hide your feelings in a joke, but your voice came out sour, revealing the truth of your heart. "I'm with you now! And you are infinitely better to me than he is. We actually get along."

"Maybe, but you don't love me like you love him." Ben was calm, too calm for anyone in the position he was in. He didn't sound angry or devastated. It was as if he'd had time to process the situation, as if he'd surrendered to the reality that confronted him every time you looked at Sirius a long time ago. He had already mourned your relationship and you wondered how long he had known about your true feelings —certainly longer than you had known yourself. 

"Ben, I-" you tried to speak, feeling the burn of tears building up in your eyes, but he interrupted you. 

"I get it, Y/N. It's not your fault. It's not anybody's fault. We can't choose who we fall in love with... and I can't force you to love me."

"But I do love you, Ben."

"I know you do, but not like I love you." The calm in his voice destroyed you. No matter how hard it was for you to admit it, he was right. You loved him, but as a friend. All this time you had tried so hard to make that change, trying to force your heart to forget Sirius, but it was simply impossible. And in the process you had ended up hurting one of the most important people in your life.

“And that’s fine, I’m not mad at you for not loving me.” Ben continued, giving you a small smile that did little to ease the pain in your heart. You were a horrible person and honestly he deserved someone better than you. "But I need you to be honest with me, because I value our friendship and I don't want to lose it too. So if you love him then say it and we'll break up right now. Maybe that way we can save our friendship."

You didn't see the point in continuing to lie. It was more than clear that you loved Ben very much, but your heart belonged to someone else. Continuing to deny it would only hurt you and him more and that was the last thing you wanted. Your deceptions had done enough damage, you didn't want to lose the beautiful bond that held you together - though there was no doubt that it wouldn't be the same after this.

"I'm sorry," you whispered in a broken voice as a couple of tears escaped your eyes. "I never meant for any of this to happen, I-"

"It's okay. Like I said, it's nobody's fault." Ben comforted you, taking your hand in his and giving it a gentle squeeze. It was ironic that he was the one making you feel better when you had been the one to hurt him, but your mind was so full of conflicting thoughts and feelings that you weren't able to realize at the time how terrible it was.  "Now, what do you say we get out of here? I'll buy you anything you want from Honeydukes."

The Hufflepuff party was exactly what Sirius needed at that moment. Loud music and lots of alcohol were the perfect combination to take his mind off you, at least for a few hours. He gave into the euphoria of the moment, losing himself in Amy's lips as they danced. It worked wonders for a while, but the more intoxicated he became, the harder it was for him to control his mind, which kept imagining that it was your hands caressing his body, your lips kissing him desperately, your hips grinding against his to the rhythm of the music, and not Amy’s. 

It became obvious that there was nothing he could do to get you out of his mind, so Sirius came up with a dumb excuse for Amy and disappeared into the sea of people before she could say a word back to him. He stumbled his way back to his dorm, cursing himself for drinking so much. Luckily he didn't run into anyone in the halls and was able to get to his bed in one piece. The room was empty since his friends were still at the party, so he had the privacy he needed to sink into his misery.

Why couldn't he be the one holding your hand while you enjoyed a date at Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop? Sirius hated that place, it was too cheesy for him, but he hated even more to see you there with another guy. He should be the one taking you on dates around Hogsmeade and buying you gifts. He wanted to walk hand in hand with you and carry your books through the halls of the school. He wanted to be yours and for you to be his, why was that so hard? 

He should have said it a long time ago, maybe if he had been honest in the past his present would be different. Maybe he would be the one you would be texting every five minutes and not that idiot Ben.

Then an idea popped into his mind. It was a terrible one, but his brain was too intoxicated to realize what he was about to do. He fumbled in the dark for his phone, which was forgotten among the mess of sheets he called a bed. The brightness of the screen blinded him for a moment, hurting his sensitive eyes, but he managed to find your name in his contacts despite the difficulties.

'You up?' Typing that message took him longer than it should have, but he didn't care. He was determined to fix his mistakes and there was nothing that could make him change his mind. 

He waited a few minutes for a reply, but it never came. He figured that was normal since it was late at night. You weren't a party girl, so you were probably already asleep. However, Sirius didn't let that discourage him, opting to leave you a voicemail instead.

"I know you're probably sleeping right now, but I can't wait any longer to tell you this..." he began, pausing for a long moment as he tried to organize his thoughts. "I lied, I do care about you... I care about you and Ben being together cause... cause I should be in his place. I like you, Y/N, a lot actually, and seeing you with him is torture. And I know you're happy with him and that he's better than me, but... I just... I wish I was the one you loved, cause I love you and I'm tired of hiding it. I love you and I wish things could be different between us." 

Sirius sent the message before his brain recovered from his drinking enough to make him change his mind. It felt good to finally let go of years of pent up feelings, he felt as if a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders. In the state he was in he wasn't able to realize what a mess his confession could create, so he rolled over in bed and in a matter of minutes he was asleep, safe in the calm that ignorance gave him.

Sirius' deep, raspy voice was the first thing you heard on the cloudy Saturday morning. You were the last of all your roommates to wake up, probably because you spent the night tossing and turning in bed as you reviewed the events of the day. You didn't feel like leaving the bed yet, so you curled up between the sheets and grabbed your phone to distract your mind. 

As you turned on the device's screen Sirius' name flashed among the notifications. Talking to him was the last thing you wanted to do at that moment, but curiosity got the better of you when you saw the time he had texted you. His voice was slow and low, almost a hoarse whisper. The way he slurred his words as he spoke told you he was drunk, although all those details stopped mattering to you when you heard the content of his message. 

He loved you?

You sat on your bed in complete shock for a couple of minutes, your eyes glued to the wall as you replayed his message over and over again to make sure it wasn't some kind of hyper-realistic hallucination. 

He loved you.

You were just beginning to lighten up at the thought of your feelings being reciprocated when a small detail dawned on you: Sirius was drunk. He had sent you that message when he was under the influence of alcohol. He wasn't himself and therefore you couldn't trust his words. 

But this time instead of sitting around assuming things, you decided to do something about it. You needed to know if his words were real, if he truly felt for you all he claimed in his message.

You were dressed and down the stairs in less than five minutes, focused on finding Sirius. You scanned the entire common room with your eyes, looking for his long brown hair and leather jacket among the crowd of students lounging on couches or doing homework at desks, getting as much work done as they could before exams. He was nowhere to be seen, but your eyes did meet his friends gathered at the side, chatting and laughing as they always did.

"Hey! I'm looking for Sirius, do you guys have any idea of where he might be?" you asked them as you approached them, shamelessly interrupting their conversation. There was a moment of silence where they all shared a look before James gave you the answer you were looking for.

"He's in bed with the worst hangover of his life," he said. "Why...?" James tried to find out what it was you wanted with his friend, but you disappeared up the stairs before he could finish the sentence.

You made your way to his bedroom without a second thought. You had been there a couple of times in the past so you knew the way. This time was different from the others though. On the previous occasions you were accompanied by Lily and you were usually there to complain about something James and Sirius had done. But this time you weren't there to fight with him like a couple of immature children. You were looking for him to discuss whatever it was that you had going on, so normally the nerves were slowly taking over your system. Still, you tried to keep them from affecting your mind, confidently knocking on his bedroom door to hide the fact that your heart was beating with a pace that was probably unhealthy. 

"Is it true?" was the first thing you said to him when Sirius opened the door. He looked like he was just getting up, his long hair tangled and his eyes narrowed as if the light was bothering him. 

It took Sirius a few seconds to comprehend what you were saying, struggling to remember the events of the night before. The throbbing pain in his head had improved, but that still didn't help him regain his memory. Everything was a confusing haze of images that passed too quickly. The harder he tried to remember, the more the details slipped away, as if they were a dream that was lost in his subconscious the moment he woke up.

But then his own voice echoed in his mind.

'I love you and I wish things could be different between us.'

"Oh," he murmured as the realization hit him. "You got my message, huh?" he added, stepping aside to let you into the room. The conversation that would follow was not one to be had in the hallway.

"That's it?" you said, watching as he sat back down on his bed. "That's all that you're going to say?"

"What more do you want me to say?" Sirius sighed, running his hand through his hair. "That I pictured our lives together a thousand times? That the sound of your laugh makes my heart race? That there's no other girl I want to be with?" he said, getting up once more to approach you. He raised his voice, but he didn't sound angry, just... frustrated. "What difference would that make? You're with him now, so it's too late." He turned his back to you since it was difficult for him to maintain eye contact with you while exposing his feelings. He hated feeling vulnerable, but there was no point in lying anymore.

"Not anymore." Your voice was low, almost a whisper, but loud enough for Sirius to hear you.

"What?" He turned, looking at you with eyes full of confusion and illusion. 

"We broke up yesterday... he knew even before I did that my heart belonged to someone else... to the only guy I swore I wasn't gonna fall for." You let out a quiet laugh, finding the irony of the situation amusing. 

"Wait, are you saying that...?" Sirius spoke cautiously, a part of him refusing to believe what you were saying.

"I'm saying that you were the one I smell in the Amortentia." You interrupted him, confirming his doubts before he could even pronounce them. "It's you, it's always been you."

Sirius didn't waste another second, closing the distance between you and crashing his lips against yours. Fireworks exploded behind your eyes as you lost yourself in the kiss, feeling the warmth of Sirius' body envelop you completely. It didn't feel real. After denying your feelings for so long it was hard to believe you were finally kissing him, but there was no denying the electricity that coursed through your body, reassuring you that it wasn't just a dream. 

The world around you froze for an instant, all thoughts unrelated to Sirius disappeared from your mind as his lips caressed yours with desperation. It felt right, as if you were put into this world to be together. His lips connected with yours perfectly, like two pieces of a puzzle that had taken you too long to put together. But it was finally happening, after all the comings and goings you had found each other and neither of you planned on letting the other go.

[jmagnabo92]

Hey The Prongsfoot Anon, who is dissatisfied with James, here, ,,

THaks for taking your time out and replying.

I did not get what I was looking for but i am really grateful for your words all the same.

Have a nice day!

Also i have read the small stories you wirte on the pair. I told you that i was talking about the long stories on Prongsfoot. It wasn't about the stories you write. THey are sweet and cute. I love them all. But then I go looking for long stories and don't like that the source of all angst is about made about sirius who is struggling more than James is. There it seems that James has it easy.

Also I wanted to clear that i am not against divorce. In fact I am pro for it. I meant that in the society around me, divorce has a reason. Like in your recent fic, Marlene felt that Sirius has always been in love with James and tried with her less etc. she felt cheated and wanted to hurt sirius. THis is the type of divorce I was talking aabout feels real. In comparision Jily divoice felt like they woke up one morning. Talked , they were on the same page, ready to divorce and co-parent harry and harry is all okay and chill with his parent's sepration. No one has gone through any emotional turmoil due to sepration. all is fine is dandy. Again, I am just using your story as an example because almost all the story with lily alive and jily divorce are based on the concep of a painless smooth jily divorce and that is what i was saying that if they were so good in communication, if they are so in link with each other, why divorce and not try more for the marriage. so it feels unreal- the being in each other's life - best friends and giving advices and being all chummy after divorce.

Also the serial you mentioned. I only have watched the initual episodes of 911 but that lady and thier kids are really effected by that man's coming out. The children are not readily acceptng. THe woman herself feels betrayed for a brief period. Later they may have reconcilefd etc but they have had a journey. Also i remeber that the lady married the man because her bilogical clock was ticking. Almost like the pact of marrying your freind after certain age. Jily is different because if canon way is chosen then at 20 they were not compromising by saddling with each other. They chose each other.

I think the grit is missing with jily break and divorce in Progsffot fandom. James and Lily behave too matures.

You don't have to reply for this. I was just really appreciative of the efforts it took for you to type that long reply and i wanted to explain my side of story a bit more.

WHat I said about James's maturity is that after those early years in stories that his struggles are over. WHat i meant when i said that i imagine him as a person who will have trouble maturing is because i think that he is the perfect mix of naive and optimistic to be like that. THe teenager who thinks that all problems are over once he reaches adulthood.thinking that being adult means having anwers to all problems. Etc.

What I mean that a James in his 30's has to have his own struggles with life. which are appropriate to experiece of a man that age which brings new obstacles and pains. Maybe Harry is entering his teen age where all kids begin hating their parents. Maybe he is having quarter life crisis. MAybe Lily is upset that he is asking for divorce when she is happy in her marriage life. Etc.

This is alos the issue, Lily is Petunia's sister. Petunia wanted to come accross as a settled woman with great life. SO, Lily being okay with divorce seems ooc.

Also I think i mentioned in my previous ask but i never said that SIruis is feminized. What i meant him taking that girly roles meant that in soap operas and in traditional romance stories, the girl is the one who is struggling and then the boy swoops in to save the day. A prongsfoot story in which James has no life problems and is chill feels like that. Not the best comparisiion but Prongsfoot angst is always heavy on Sirius's side that is why i drew the comparision.

So, yes this was all.

Again you don't have to reply again. I just thought I owed it to you to explain my side a bit better. I am not sure if I was succesful or not....

Anyways. Take care.....

Well, hello, Anon.  

I know you said that I didn’t have to answer, but I felt compelled, too, because I’m genuinely curious - what WERE you hoping to get out of these asks?  

I’m also curious about why if you know that my stories genuinely don’t focus on the Sirius angst or struggling more than James, that you came to me?  

If you’re curious, I think Sirius angst comes from being Sirius fans first.  Some people like to torture their favs and Sirius has more page-time than James does.  We know him better from canon than we do James, so we tend to focus on him.   I also don’t think James has it easy.  He still has to deal with figuring out himself and breaking up his marriage (if he’s married, which isn’t easy), he still loses his parents and finds himself without that safety net.  My dad’s 62 and just lost his last parent recently and he’s been struggling - I can’t imagine losing both parents when he’s still technically a teen and not struggling with that.  That’s almost always there.

So, he has struggles.

So, you said that this wasn’t about a particular fic, but then you bring up “Fun in the Sun” - well, what you probably don’t know is that the prompt behind that fic was Sirius/Marlene have a terrible divorce while Jily have an amicable divorce.  James was always *meant* to help Sirius per the prompt and discussion with the artist.  It was written purposely to highlight the two different types of divorces, and I wanted to follow through with that concept because it’s what the artist wanted.  I don’t usually do divorce fic (or focus on it if I do) like I did in this fic.  Jily also divorced 3 years before SM did because Marlene dragged the divorce out to punish Sirius.  So, yeah, Jily is friends and have had an easy time co-parenting because it’s been going on for *years* all the growing pains that initially happened, already happened.  

This was a Prongsfoot fic, I don’t care about Jily’s divorce, it was a plot device.  That’s it.  And like, that’s another thing with Prongsfoot Long-fics that deal with Jily divorce.  We aren’t here to focus on Jily - we’re here for Prongsfoot, so why would we bother having the ‘emotional turmoil’ especially when the divorce happened years before.

Yes, Athena/Micheal struggle at first in 9-1-1, but if you were to look at the middle/end of S2, they’re perfectly fine.  Which is approximately a year or two into the divorce - which is where Jily was during this fic.  So, yeah, no there’s no reason for there to be issues - again, that was part of the prompt.

Again - we’re not here for Jily, so maybe there’s no grit, but that’s not why we are Prongsfoot fans, so… Sorry?  Not, Sorry.  If you don’t want Jily divorce, you can always filter it out.  A03 is amazing for filters :)

Like I said, James’ struggles are subjective.  Sometimes the fic just focuses more than one thing than another and like that’s up to the writer, if it’s not your cup of tea - that’s cool, you can always write your own?

I usually don’t get into Lily’s head much, ‘cause again I’m here for Prongsfoot - over 400 fics tells you that - Although sometimes I have them share James (I bet you’d really love those fics :) ). Anyhoo, maybe she is struggling or maybe she feels relief.  But I can’t imagine why you think Petunia’s views on Divorce have any impact on her sister’s?  ‘Cause like, siblings can have different views - I know I have four siblings and ain’t none of us agree on nothing.  :)3

Lily’s view on divorce is highly subjective since we know so little about her.  But she doesn’t seem like the type to stay in an unhappy marriage and forcing someone to stay always leads to unhappiness.  

I never said you said he was feminized, although I think you did?  What you’re saying here is suggesting that he’s a “damsel in distress” and needs a hero - which is a) very sexist and b) just not true.  Sirius is a badass in every Prongsfoot fic I have ever read.  I can’t speak for every fic in existence but Fuck man, struggling and having support from James is not the same thing as being the heroine that waits around for her hero to save her - and even if that was the case… the implication that he’s girly for it really grinds my gears.

Anyway, we focus on Sirius and angsting him because he’s easier to angst since we know more about him, but if you don’t like that - that’s okay, you can always write what you wanna read.  

Thanks, take care :)

[jilyradar]

Hello! I’m new to the Jily fandom and am looking for the best canon compliant jily fics. I love the marauders friendship sooo much! Currently reading The Life and Times but there’s just not enough james x lily yet! And I just don’t know how to find anything 🤷‍♀️ PLEASE HELP

Hello, hello anon and welcome to the fandom!! Hope you enjoy it here!

Ok, first of all I just have to mention my favorite fics ever here, they're multi-chapters so they'll blow your mind and keep you busy for a while 😂

Then this post right here I remember has a LOT of my favorite canon fics and is just excellent overall.

For even newer recs you can look around this blog, I have a number of canon fics and they're all my personal handpicked recommendations.

Also @jilyawards blog is a big help in finding great fics based on categories. If you go down the years on the side-panel, you'll see yearly lists, including for canon.

Have fun 🤗

[st4rsinheaven]

been thinking about that one tiktok (@doubleshotgnt) talking abt the problem with lily evans being overlooked in the fandom and how it's more bc of her being treated as an extension of james potter instead of it being solely because of the jily/jegulus debate-

and YESSSS oml ive been waiting to talk on that. I could yap for hours about how lily has such an interesting backstory and complex dynamics with other characters which could be considered as equally interesting as the main 4 marauders - watching her former best friend become a death eater, living as a muggleborn student at hogwarts during voldemort's rise to power in the wizarding world, her friendship with remus, her complex relationship with petunia WHY DOES IT NOT GET TALKED ABOUT like why do I literally see so much content for black brothers angst but barely any for the evans sisters??? when they are quite literally parallels?? cmon now.

(not to mention how she's so powerful that she singlehandedly ended the 1st wizarding war. how slughorn thought she was too gifted at potions to possibly be a muggleborn (not how it works but anyway) like girlie had some insane asf magical abilities n everytime i see her getting dismissed in those 'marauders characters with the most aura' ranking videos i feel like hitting something)

and sure, while sometimes lily being overlooked and hated on is due to the shipping arguments, i think it's more likely that she gets overshadowed because of how she gets heavily grouped in with james and harry in the hp books, and we get way more focus on james' life and his friendships and as a result lily gets pushed to the side. and guys look i love jily sm theyre my babies but GIVE ME LILY EVANS AS AN INDEPENDENT CHARACTER TOO GODDAMIT because it honestly feels as if she's only really brought up when james is involved, whether its a shipping debate or js in general. and her ao3 tag has her last name as potter when she literally spent longer being lily evans than james' wife. unironically maybe this why I like some jegulus fics for the reason that lily's character feels more well-written because she isn't just written to be james' love interest and it allows writers to explore her nuances more idk. also sapphic lily has my entire heart

so yeah <3 soz this is such a ramble guys but i genuinely js want more lily and marauders era girls representation and appreciation in general bc they deserve it

[soup-of-the-daisies]

so here’s part 2 of my james potter hcs bc this shitbag lives in my head rent free :))

(part 1 for those interested)

his prescription isn’t really heavy and he can technically get around without his glasses, but he gets really bad headaches if he doesn’t wear them

tried muggle contacts for a bit but got an eye infection after a month, went back to glasses permanently

can get really, really mean in the blink of an eye if he sees or hears something he doesn’t appreciate—something as innocent as feeling jealous or something as bad as blatant bigotry, doesn’t really matter. fandom may say that he was sirius’ moral compass but ohhh boy

“imagine sirius black having to reel you in” - overheard in the hospital wing by a random hufflepuff after a group of wannabe death eaters got hexed so badly for terrorising some muggleborn students they had to stay there for two days

can argue himself out of any sticky situation by being passionate and arrogant (like only getting a month’s worth of detention for hexing said group of wannabe death eaters into a two-day stay at the hospital wing)

did not relentlessly pursue lily, actually. he didn’t ask her out until their fifth year and stopped entirely after the slur-incident

did form a relentless (at times one-sided) rivalry that often went way too far with severus snape though, i’ll give you that

he’s got hazel eyes with a bit of green thank you

his nose isn’t longer than harry’s (he’s got a ‘hidung pesek’, like my mum would say). his nosebridge can’t hold up european glasses and it’s a struggle

sirius looks physically like his father which means james does, shamefully, find orion black handsome in a purely aesthetic way. he’ll take this tidbit to the grave with him though as sirius would have an aneurysm if he found out that james thinks orion is a bit of a dilf

james has tackled peter multiple times. most notably, that one time it was over the last digestive in the biscuit tin that hope lupin sent remus

peter broke his nose and james cried because he felt so bad

he’s got a dab hand at healing spells and sirius is good at cleaning spells so it was fine in the end

also ugly crier james 2k23. that man can WEEP

gives the BEST hugs. you’ll feel so safe. he just presses your face against his chest and you’ve got to take it, because it’ll relax your entire body

“it’s like i’ve been reborn” - peter pettigrew after The James Hug following the orange marmalade incident of 1975

will never talk about the orange marmalade incident of 1975 because peter asked him nicely

great secret keeper!! should’ve been his own secret keeper, actually!!

big beatles fan and really cringy about it: he even considers getting a mop top for a bit.

thinks george harrison looks like sirius (but not as handsome) and therefore george is his favourite

same james

ALSO he would be so flattered that some parts of this fandom see him as ATJ’s john lennon i swear lmao

would kill for sirius and has considered killing for sirius on multiple occasions

harry’s ‘trouble usually finds me’ gene comes from him and he has been face to face with acromantulas on multiple occasions purely by accident

harry’s ‘there’s no need to call me sir, professor’ gene is a mix of lily’s sass and james’ smart-assery. part of the reason jily started dating is bc they could match each other’s quips so well

good at practical magic with several seemingly random interests in the theoretical background of certain types of magic. will go off on a tangent on the Braach’s Sixteen Laws of Weight when someone offhandedly mentions a featherlight charm

created the runic sequences of the Map that ground the spellwork woven into the object to ambient magic all by himself and was SO proud of himself that severus was valid in saying james strutted around like he owned the place

human embodiment of the following emoticon= >:3

[daydreamingqueen1]

People watching

Pairing: Jily/Jegulily (James x Regulus x Lily)

Content/ Warnings: mentions of self hatred, PINNING, fluffy really

Summary: Reggie watches James ask Lily out yet again.

Word count: 1.0k

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When you hate yourself, watching everybody else's life becomes a great way to pass the time.

Regulus hates himself. He could get into great detail as to why, but that would involve acknowledging his existence, which right now he is trying to avoid. In addition to this, his favorite novel is starting.

He makes himself as small and insignificant as possible, an old art he has perfected as the youngest son to the noble house of Black. A big book and a corner in the library are usually a good way to archive that.

James Potter has just walked into the library. His self confidence and petulant optimism give him a strut that Regulus hates with the same passion he that he loves.

Lily Evans has been studying by herself next to the big window for an hour now. Regulus knows that. But James is discovering it just now.

A slight smirk forms in Regulus's face; the show is about to get interesting.

"Evans!" An overly excited James exclaims, pleasantly surprised at spotting her.

Three things happen at the same time.

"Shh!" Madam Pince utters with a certainly terrifying look.

"Ugh," Lily groans into her lecture notes.

James trips.

Oh, Regulus loves this.

The boy wonder regains his footing with only a small blush and a big ego bruise, "Sorry," he mutters and but not even his charming smile has much of an effect on Madam Pince's permanent scowl.

Delayed but not deterred, James makes his way to Lily's spot. She is, to be fair, containing her laughter pretty well if it wasn't for the slight crinkle on the side of her eyes. Regulus has come to search for it over time.

"Hey," James leans his weight into his hand that he carefully positions next to her things. To the simple eye, it might look like an effortless pose, but if people cared to observe, then they'll notice how he is absolutely forcing it in an attempt to not seem nervous, which he, in fact, is.

Lily stares back at him, half amused and half annoyed. The usual dichotomy that writes onto her face and brain when it comes to James Potter. "Hey."

What is only a polite acknowledgment of existence is quickly taken as an invitation to intrude, for James smiles brightly and sits next to her. "History of magic essay?" The question is redundant, the whole spread of Lily's notes is covered in the long scribbles that you can only get from the tedious lectures on the Goblin's war.

Regulus watches James left foot tapping incessantly, he is definitely nervous. The question now is why. There's more to it than his usual giddiness around his crush Lily.

The young witch nods, a traitorous fond tilt of her lips betrays her overall look of annoyance, "Yes, Potter, why do you care?"

James startles at that, it seems like his planning had only reached that far.

"Um, well, I was just… uh... I need help with it!" he stammers.

"Really, Potter?" Lily arches her eyebrow, her arm resting bored over her notebook. "Which part?" She challenges him.

James blinks blankly for a few seconds, "That's the thing, uh, I haven't started it yet."

Idiot.

Regulus admires them from behind his book, observing every detail as Lily finally gives in and agrees to study with James. He takes in everything: The subtle glances and accidental brushes of their hands; the way Lily's lips curl slightly, betraying a certain fondness despite her chastising every time James attempts to distract her; how James eyes glint underneath his glasses, looking at her as if she's the most beautiful thing in the world.

A sigh escapes his lips involuntarily, he longed to be them. Shed out his skin and exist in the middle of their mutual pull.

James's hand trembles slightly as he pulls something small from his back pocket. Regulus can't make out what it is, his body leaning forward discreetly.

"Uh, Lily?" James clears his throat nervously, sliding the thing closer to her as she looks up from her parchment. "It 's for you..."

And with that he points his wand and mumbles a quiet 'Engorgio' making it grow into a beautiful white rose.

Oh...

Regulus had been wrong. James hadn't entered the library casually.

Huh, that explains the nerves. He wonders how Lily's going to react.

The Gryffindor girl stares down at the rose on the table, blinking at it like it will suddenly explode or something. Regulus thinks that with James’s record you never know but it's not probable that he'd do that to his precious Lily.

The boy shifts on his seat, fixing his glasses nervously as he waits for some kind of response. As ever, James Potter isn't the patient kind. He starts rambling.

Sweet heavens.

"I saw it on the edge of the Forbidden Forest and– Well, I thought that it sort of reminds me of you, you know? Lily, flowers, a rose." James chuckles awkwardly, his hand rubbing at the back of his neck, regretting exposing his dumb trail of thought.

"I know you have made yourself clear— very clear, indeed— but I still wanted to give you this and ask you one last time."

Gently, he nudges the offending flower closer to the yet unreadable girl. "If you say no, again, I won't bother you anymore... I just wanted to try one last time, for good measure," he takes a deep breath, looking at her vulnerably as he asks in an uncharacteristically soft voice,"So, Lily, would you go out with me, just once?"

Regulus spares him an empathetic smile. Here we go again. Another Lily rejection.

Something flickers in her, the green of her eyes glimmering in a way that makes even Regulus hold out his breath.

"Okay." Lily sighs.

Now it's time for James to blink bewildered, "...What?"

"I said okay," Lily repeats like she hasn't just turned James' world upside down, "Saturday. The Three broomsticks. Five o clock."

She picks up her notes and stuffs them inside her bag before standing up, her long fiery hair swaying magnificently as she grants him one last look. "See you, Potter."

And with that she passes right next to Regulus as she swiftly exits the library, leaving both him and James shocked with the sudden turn of events.

Regulus loves his novel.

✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆

♡, reblogs and comments are appreciated <3

probably gonna make a few more parts of this, I have so many ideas for the jegulily beginnings

masterlist

[dandelionflowery]

Intro post!

(breast cancer awareness post here/the legends of tumblr here, variations here and here , alt link for number 7/arch nemesis Cynthia here) [the two topics are wholly unrelated]

HII!!

My name on the internet is Dandelion, but you can call me whatever you like honestly. It's so hard to find a good name around here, the fae keep stealing them

I use any pronouns, online people default to they/them, IRL people default to she/her, you can use whatever you feel like!

I'm aroace 🧡💛🤍🩵💙 and my gender is up to interpretation lol

I'm 17 and I live in France but I have both French and American citizenship (so i do speak both french and english)

I'M A YEAR AWAY FROM BEING AN ADULT HELP

I have both scoliosis (diagnosed, 45°) and probably dyslexia (not officially diagnosed but all the internet tests I did were screaming at me to go get an official diagnosis- as has life lol) and those two really hate each other who deCIDED SCOLISOIS SHOULD BE SPELLED THE WAY IT IS (if i spell it correctly be aware that either I copied it from somewhere, or i thought about it for WAY too long, or it was a monkeys on keyboards thing)

I also probably have some form of undiagnosed neurodivergence, i think autism and some hints of adhd :)

I created a blog just for reblogging shit (aptly named @dandelionflowery-reblogs) but i suck at tagging stuff on most of my accounts 😭

I'm not often super active on here, at least not regularly, mostly because I have way too many classes but sometimes I go absolutely insane and spend like an entire day on here (oops)

actually i'm most active on here I think now lol

~~☆~~

I like:

- Harry Potter (Drarry, Deamus, Romione, Linny are my main ships but there's a decent chance you could get me to like a specific portrayal of just about any pairing lol) [also fuck jkr]

- The Marauders (WOLFSTARRR! Also Jily and aroace Peter and maybe Remadora. Same thing as before: open to other pairings [I know of and appreciate the ships with the girls but usually I'll lean towards the first ones mentioned actually I'll lean towards wolfstar with background Jily and aa battery Peter)

- Reading and books in general

- Fanfics, fanart!! (Both writing/drawing them and reading/simping for them)

Speaking of which, I have a side blog that's actually technically marauders themed! @mybrain-fanficedition

- Interactions on here!!

- there's probably some other stuff I like but I can't think of anything rn

~~☆~~

I don't like:

- Following from above, I said I was open to pretty much any pairing, ... I lied lol

Idk what jegulus did to me but i just don't like it for some reason (jegulily? lovely. jily? fantastic. jegulus? less.)

- Also the usual list of if you're pro-genocide, homophobic transphobic uh racist, pedophile or just a generally mean person

~~☆~~

I like talking to people even if you don't know what to say just say hi!

Also I have other social media, come find me if you want!

@/flowerydandelion, @/dandelionfloweryart and @/wands.swords.and.books on Instagram!

On Ao3 I'm like 90% sure it's DandelionFlowery and uh probably similar usernames on Discord and Reddit [though I'm not often active on there]

Wait if I link my ao3 that means i need to actually post my fics lol

Leave comments if you read my fics, I love feedback!! (or just leave kudos, it makes me irrationally happy lol)

~~*~~

tags about my current wips featuring really bad summaries:

#third time's the charm- Lily

(not going to be the actual title i think but first i have to write it, we'll worry about titles later)

Lily decides canon sucks and she's going to do something about it

woah i wasn't lying when i said really bad summaries

> Canon happens once, and Lily watches over her son from the afterlife. When canon gets to the scene in DH where Harry gets to see his parents again, something happens and Lily finds herself back in the past, reliving her life from Harry's birth on. She plans, dies and learns. The third time, she's ready.

#our broken hearts- an ode to wolfstar (this one is subject to change bc that title is way too sappy for me)

Sirius dated Peter. And Marlene. And Lily. And James. And then Remus?

>Originally this started in the tags of some post and i mentioned Sirius x Peter, and it blew out of proportion.

>Sirius spends many years finding out who he likes, and ends up with Remus after a lot of experimenting.

~~*~~

totally normal link trust me :)

if you still trust me (and why shouldn't you?), here's the ULTIMATE PRIDE FLAG lol)

let's see how trustworthy you think i am

wanna see some stuff i wrote? (warning, a friend said it took them half an hour to read just the main bit lmao)

an apology 1 | 2

useful tumblr post about hobbies

SNAIL CROSSING SNAIL CROSSING SNAIL CROSSING

~~*~~

side blogs: @x-lovegood @xenophilius-quibbler (Xenophilius Lovegood rp) @sybilances (Sybill Trelawney rp) @bleidd-ddyn (Remus Lupin rp)

@antheia-anthousai (nymph oc)

@mybrain-fanficedition (as mentioned above)

@am-i-a-crab (crab army!!)

+ another two gimmick blog but i'm not saying which ones >:) [maybe i should, they're both still active lmao]

small + pink means dead accounts lol

[seriouslysam8]

Can you post a line from what you're writing Sam? Because I'll feel like I won something and I desperately need a win today ☹️

I WILL GIVE YOU A DOUBLE WIN BECAUSE YOU ARE SO LOVELY.

From Brumous:

Footsteps thundered through the trees. Sirius stiffened, his hand reaching for his wand in his pocket. He tugged it loose, holding it at his left side as his eyes darted around to find the source of the noise. Two bodies appeared through the thicket of trees, both tall with messy dark hair. Sirius’ heart skipped a beat.

“Harry!” Sirius shouted. 

One of the figures stopped and turned towards him. Sirius took a step forward when he locked eyes with his godson. The kid bolted in Sirius’ direction. He couldn’t help but run towards his godson as well. Harry collided roughly against his chest, knocking the air out of Sirius’ lungs. Sirius tightened his grip, not wanting to let go of his godson. His jaw pressed against the side of Harry’s head, his eyes locking with none other than James.

Harry pulled back, his chin tilting back slightly to look at him. “How are you here?” he whispered, his big green eyes roaming across his face.

Sirius swallowed. “Fluff,” he responded, his fingers coiling around Harry’s arms. “Who did this to you?”

From Alew (the Blackinnon adopts Harry after Jily dies story that as been invading my mind the past couple of days):

“Dumbledore explained everything to me,” Remus commented, his palms rubbing against his trousers. “I think we were both morons the past several months. I’m sorry, Sirius. Truly, I am.”

Sirius nodded, a lump congealing in the back of his throat. “Me too. I’m sorry I thought the worst about you.”

“Did James believe I was the spy too?” Remus asked in a tight voice.

At the mention of James, Harry perked up in Sirius’ lap. He looked around the parlor.

“Dada?” Harry called.

Knives sliced at Sirius’ heart as he wrapped his arms around Harry and tried to pull the kid close to his chest once more. Harry whimpered and squirmed in his arms, calling out for his dad again. Sirius hadn’t the faintest clue on what he was even supposed to say to Harry. Could a child that young even comprehend what dead meant? How long would it be until he understood that his parents weren’t coming back? Ever.