#mentions of literally every member + txt’s yeonjun

[aseaofyoongi]

my heart did | jjk

jeon jungkook x reader (f)

genre: e2l | bully romance | smut | angst

rating: mature audiences only (strictly 18+)

summary: as soon as senior years comes to an end a lot of teens shed who we were and strive to be flourish into a more polished version of themselves. although, broken hearts aren’t so quick to heal what happens when thoughts reveal all we need to know?

warnings: lets begin.. themes and mentions of bullying; brief physical violence; brief mention of blood; bickering; denial of feelings; mention of less than ideal parents; cliche high school themes (in flashbacks); foul language; oral (m. receiving); penetrative and unprotected sex; clitoral stimulation; nipple play; thigh riding; vag fingering; overstimulation; sub!jjk themes - he is a good boy; he uh.. arrives on her face.. anyways; i hate this trope ugh but miscommunication; jjk has a big d!; not edited.

word count: 25,5 thousand words

posted: wed sept. 6, 2023 at 12:28PM

notable songs: like i want you - giveon | thinkin bout you - frank ocean | like or like like - miniature tiger | war of hearts - ruelle | sunday morning - maroon5 🎧

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The sun is now setting. 

Behind you as the last hours of the late summer evening approached the sun was beginning to finally pucker its lips against the horizon, as a result, the sky became dusted with hints of deep orange, yellow and purple. The clock finally struck nine o’clock and you couldn’t help but slump down on the palms of your hands, sitting behind the main desk on the same stool you had been since the beginning of your shift. Your pupils followed as the little hands on the clock hung on the opposite wall seemed to move slower and slower, completely freezing you in time. 

Fucking Mondays. 

You sighed. When you had initially signed up for the work study position at the library you thought things would be just a bit different. 

For example, you thought being a staff member here would get you free access to course books and materials but that wasn’t the case. Right before you’d been hired, some idiot named Yoongi who worked behind the help desk at the computer lab was caught selling copies of the course materials to multiple students on campus. 

Like—right before you were hired and now that privilege had been swiped right off the tip of your fingers the moment your member badge had been printed. 

Secondly, time behind that rotating door at the main entrance just stopped. No, more like slammed down on the brakes abruptly the moment you crossed that threshold. There were no warnings or brake lights or even a bright sign to apprise in advance. 

Another drawn out sigh escaped your lips. 

There was no exaggeration in your boredom, however, besides the ‘promises’ of saving money on school materials vanishing entirely, you still needed the monetary earnings so you hid behind a fabricated smile and immediately accepted the job offer happily. 

Well, as happily as you could be. 

God, you were jaded. Five after nine. Only five minutes had gone by yet it felt like an eternity. 

Your mind was on overdrive yet your body remained stationed in the same exact place—in the same exact position. Not a single tendon transposed and they constricted your muscles in place. You were there sort of glued to the metal surface of the stool but fuck did you wanted to move. 

Needed to actually. You needed a sort of mobile stimulation but still you couldn’t seem to get your arms and legs to comply. Not until your focus circled around your extremities and your need to just fucking. . do something. 

You crossed your legs to the left, then to the right, then you hung your legs on the wooden bar under the desk to give them a rest from just hanging on your side, then you sat with your legs spread open before realizing you wore a skirt and you quickly pressed your thighs together tightly. Shift after shift you grew more angsty, more impatient, more exasperated with the sluggish speed the hours of the night adopted. 

Slowly, you reached into your bag and unwrapped a piece of gum before sticking it in your mouth. You chewed slowly. Seven after nine, only two minutes have gone by since you last looked at the time. 

Okay, maybe if you number your chews to the rhythm of each second then time will somehow speed by. Right? You began your countdown backwards from sixty. 

You chewed down on the watermelon flavored stick of gum. Sixty. 

Again, fifty-nine. 

And, again,  fifty-eight. 

Once more, fifty-seven. 

In just a matter of minutes the sky behind you turned pitch black and finally the stars came out to play, they pranced around dancing in the sparkling delight and you couldn’t really help but envy their freedom as they lived without confinement. 

“Tell me something. .” You quickly registered that irritating tone, that very familiar and insipid, absolutely annoying and vexing tone. The same one which sent a bubbling shot of acid to course into your bloodstream every time you were faced with the disdain of hearing it, “should I reprint you a copy of the employee manual? Last time I checked skirts above the knee and gum chewing are strictly prohibited in the work place.” 

You leaned your head to the side, narrowing your eyes in his direction as he stood by the doorframe, “you’re not the supervisor, let alone the manager,” you murmured through gritted teeth, “fuck off.” 

He shook his head slowly while clicking his tongue. He was mocking you, the little shit was mocking you, “Not a manager. Just someone who likes to enforce the rules especially comes to you.” 

“Rule enforcer?” you scoffed, chewing louder and louder as you chomped down, purposefully smacking your gum in the process, “sounds a lot like you being a little bitch. I guess it’s all just the same to me.” 

“Bitch?” he guffawed. 

“Yes, that’s what I said,” you challenged. 

“Mini skirt, gum chewing, and foul language. You’re really making this so easy for me,” he mocked. 

The extent of your interactions were always, always, reduced to this. Just the endless streaks of taunting, the continuity of poking at each other buttons beyond forgiveness, and to top it all of the boiling irritation cooking up in the pit of your stomach. 

As far back as you could remember there wasn’t an ounce of amiability in the mixture of your interactions together. 

You and him met the summer before the ninth grade. From there on you knew him once classes began. Well ‘knew’ was a very loose term in this situation. The two of you were just teens, fifteen years old to be exact, in the same school, in the same home room, yet from different cliques. 

His brown eyes drank you in like he was consuming every inch of your soul—it was invasive, intimidating, and exactly what you deserved. Deep down you were one hundred-percent sure of the fact. 

“What?” you barked. 

“Just remembering the good old time,” he smirked, “the ones where words remain your preferred and deadliest weapon.” 

What transpired from that night was nothing compared to his cold gaze and punctured words. 

Faint lights of that night sparkled into memory, years have passed but you remember every detail as if it was just yesterday. 

The school bathroom was your least favorite place in the building, it was usually crowded with destined criminals, the stench was horrid and it was the obvious root of every ridiculous rumor to ever be birthed within the walls of Oakwood High School. 

You leaned against the white ceramic sink, your back faced the stained plastic mirror as you faced him sitting on top of the toilet tank. He was the personification of trouble, the very synonym of everything you needed to stay away from. 

The two of you came from two different worlds. 

He was draped and wrapped up in a black hoodie, complemented by dark distressed jeans while his rugged and muddy boots stained found camp on the toilet seat, staining it beyond repair. 

“What exactly is it that you need from me?” he asked, his tone wasn’t as stern or deep as you usually heard around the halls. There was a slight stutter; a falter. 

“It’s more than one thing,” you exhaled, your eyes flickered between him and the stall just to the right of him, “. .that I need from you.” 

He hummed, “go on.” 

The sun trickled in through the foggy windows and it embellished very detail, every feature that you had never once before noticed on the boy before you. His eyes were giant orbs almost doe like, his lips were a deep taint of roseate the same one which dusted the apples of his cheeks. There was a certain delicate look behind the dark aura he cemented within himself. 

You took paced steps in his direction feeling just a bit dizzy the closer you became. 

Perhaps, it was that overbearing piss smell. 

Or, perhaps, you just didn’t want to go through with this. You wanted to call this off but there was this fervent exhilaration burning just below your skin—you wanted to continue speaking to him, you wanted to envelop yourself in the softness of his lips. 

But this wasn’t right but you couldn’t help the guidance of your feet, until finally you stood right before him. 

Up close his eyes were prettier, shinier yet darker and you easily found yourself swimming in them engulfed in vastness simulating the bottomless sea. 

He was everything you wanted and everything you needed to stay away from. 

Two different people. Two different worlds. 

“Are you going to tell me what you need?” 

“I think,” your palm landed on his knee for support as you climbed onto the toilet seat taking a seat on his lap, “it’s much better if I show you.” 

By now, and by the radicle of his reputation you expected for him to push you right off his life, for him to gargle the disgust in the back of his throat and regurgitate it right back on you. But he didn’t instead his gaze intently followed you every move, he probably already noticed your quivering figure hiding behind your confident facade. 

There was no shaking off this nervousness, even but in your mind you reminded yourself that you were you and he was simply him. 

“Show me what exactly?” he swallowed, his Adam's bobbed distinctively, “you know this is the first time you’ve ever uttered a single word in my direction.” 

“I highly doubt that,” you hid your nervousness behind the security of your confident tone. 

“It’s true,” he continued, “I bet you have never even noticed that my locker is directly across from yours.” 

“Wait. .” You hooked your bait, hanging it low over his head attempting to reel him in once and for all, “do you spend your time in the halls looking at me?” 

“I never said—“ 

Your palms found their way up to towards the back of his neck and you inched closer to his face vividly detailing the golden tone of his glowing skin. 

You never noticed before, he was always an arm’s length away, which was probably your fault to begin with, but he was truly beautiful. 

“You did kind of imply it.” 

“I don’t think it works that way.” 

“Does to me.” 

His eyes remained on your lips as you tucked your lower lip under your upper teeth.  There was an unreadable expression ignited behind his pupils, something you’ve never seen before, not behind the frigid gaze of your best friends and it certainly wasn’t present in the way your boyfriend looked at you either. 

It held the comfort of tenderness and it wrapped you right into his warm embrace. 

“You know, you keep averting my question.” 

“Remind me, once again,” you smiled softly, “what is it that you wanted to know.” 

“What do you want to show me?” you pursed out your lower lip before licking them agonizingly slowly to almost emphasize their plumpness. While coating them in a thin layer  of the sheen shininess from your saliva. That put him in a trance, his eyes were locked on you intently. It’s working. 

“Kiss me,” you whispered, your lips hovered right over his, the waft of your paced breath fanned one another. His mouth was enveloped with the cool aromatic scent of mint. You liked that a lot—it drew you in. 

He froze against the white tiled wall behind him, his eyes were closed and he waited in anticipation of your lips finally meeting his. Instead, you took the liberty of snapping a mental picture. One you knew you would hang in the forefront of your mind for a very very long time, because after today, after the tones of both of your pink lips finally meshed together everything would go to shit. 

And it would all be your fault. 

“For someone who’s begging to kiss me you sure are taking your sweet time.” 

The pads of your fingers brushed against his velvet lips as they spread wide depicting his smile, in turn you’d notice the way that very smile trickled to everyone of his features. From the dimples impaling his honey cheeks to his scrunched up nose and brows scrunched up together. 

“I’m not begging,” you objected, laying against his chest—he was broad you could tell even under the dark clothes and he felt firm. All you wanted was to be cocooned in his heated touch. 

Even in the scorching summer his warmth is.. a solace. You didn’t mind being consumed by it burning in the flames ignited by his touch. 

“I asked. Just curious to know if you would even want to kiss me,” say no, run away, run away from me, you yelled at him in your head. 

“Curious?” 

You hummed, “So.. Do you wanna?” 

“Kiss you?” 

You hummed again, “I’m not asking for your hand in marriage. It’s just one kiss.” 

“Just a kiss?” He asks a lot of questions. 

“Okay,” he breathed. 

There were many things you forbid yourself from submitting to at the expense of your insatious desires. This included consuming sweets past eight o’clock, drinking any type of soda, and even suppressing anything you’ve ever felt for anyone in return for the validation of others. Deep behind the rhythmic beating of your heart you knew this should’ve also included kissing him. You knew you should’ve backed off, said no, avoided him as if he was something you ran away from. 

But you couldn’t help but be guided here by the pure delight of getting to have this for once. You wanted to be selfish and drown in those very desires you didn’t dare act on prior to today. Not under self-induced circumstances instead something you know could hurt him right after you pulled away from his lips. 

You were a wretched person but all you think about, all you cared about was the way he inched closer towards you, rapidly closing the gap between the two of you. The only sounds bouncing off the walls were your needy pants and the thump thump which composed a song out of the beats of both of your racing hearts. 

His head tilted slightly as he leaned in, his eyes explored every inch of your face taking in every depiction of your features. And no matter how many times you could attempt to hide it—he would know. He could clearly see the birth of the flames rampant behind the tones of your eyes. 

He nudged his nose against yours, and your mouths fell together, soft and open. You closed your eyes instantly and they felt heavy, almost as if your eyelids were glued together. Though, you urged to open them, to live in every single second your lips remained connected with his, because you knew this wasn’t likely to happen again. Not after today. Not ever. 

You couldn’t help but want to bear witness to the perfectness of your lips dancing against one another. 

His mouth was silken, you found yourself melting into his body, into his lips, into his touch. Nobody had ever kissed you with the unspoken one passion he was. 

No one. Certainly not your boyfriend. 

You allowed yourself to become drunk under his trance and he fed the butterflies flapping their wings against the lining of your stomach rapidly. 

You wanted to camp in the fondness of that moment forever, and ever. and ever. . . 

Vacating the stool you stood by the large windows facing the parking lot behind the library. However, your attention was clutched by the sparkling stars, it was a form of a distraction. You wanted to stop thinking of him, his gaze seizing your figure tracing the outline of your legs, the curves and dips between your hips and waist and finally the sneaky peaks of your collar bones under your crop top. 

His eyes were hard to read making it impossible to decipher whether he undressed you or condemned your being.  

Though, you knew you deserved the latter. 

“Words were never my weapon,” you whispered the fib hoping that you would believe it if you heard it outloud. It didn’t work. 

He chuckled, “right. . your lips were the blades that pierced my heart and your words were the bullets that finished me off.”

“Jungkook. .” you trailed off. 

“What?” he spat, “can’t handle the truth?” 

Fuck, that hurt but you deserved it.  

“Jungkook, just shut up.” 

But his back was already turned towards you and his eyes no longer scanned you like you were the phrases typed on the pages of his favorite book. 

“I’m so. .” you began but you just couldn’t get it out. 

“There it is again,” Jungkook shook his head, clicking his tongue. 

“That’s not what I meant,” you sighed, collecting your thoughts why did you always manage to say the wrong fucking thing, “I’m just trying to apologize to you for. . everything.” 

“Right. . now?” he wore a puzzled expression, his eyes squinted with skepticism. Back in highschool Jungkok was quiet, shy and mysterious. He could’ve easily flown under the radar and lived his life in the seclusion of being a wallflower. But then you happened. You in that bathroom, on his lap with his lips on yours. 

Even now, years later, you could still feel their phantom softness on yours. 

You played with the loose thread on the hem of your top averting the scrutiny of the judgment in his eyes, “better late than never.” 

“You put me through hell and I’m supposed to act as if all is forgiven. Today, because you can no longer live with that guilt?” there was a smirk plastered on his face while traces of venom laced his words. 

“That’s not the reason why…” 

“Then, why… Why?” 

Words failed to roll off the tip of your tongue, and there was a cloud of shame hanging over your head but Jungkook was resentful and cold with his words and you knew that at this point your apology would do nothing to fix what was already broken. Nevertheless, you stood there like a child being scolded because the least you could do was be the receiver of his resentment. 

“Are you looking for a shot at self redemption? To feel better about yourself? Or maybe the guilt really is eating you bit by bit. Whatever it may be I don’t forgive you and I never will. You wanna know why? Because unlike others I’m not convinced that people like you can change,” he continued, there was a rampant anger burning in his eyes now, “you look back on our time in high school and feel this sense of. . relief that you were who you were. There is not an ounce of your being that would go back and change things and if we were to turn back time you would still choose to be the viper who could go around injecting your venom into others at free will. I know you just want to leap over that stepping stone and prove to yourself that you have grown-up but you can’t fool me and you will not make an example out of me.” 

“That’s not. .” you drifted off, tears swelled behind your eyelids but you blinked them away, “That’s not why I wanted to do Jungkook. .” 

“No?” he asked. 

“No,” you muttered through gritted teeth, mad at your past self for being a piece of shit, mad at him for not allowing you to speak, mad at life. Everything. 

“You want me to forgive you?” 

You remained quiet. 

“Then, beg.” 

“You know what?” You quickly wiped the tear that trickled down your heated cheek, “I actually did mean to apologize but I’m not sure that you actually deserve it anymore.” 

They say what comes around goes around and you were certain this was the circle of justice you would forever be looped in the extent of your interactions with Jungkook because, this is pretty much how they always played out.  He would never forgive you and you would never be able to form the right words to ease the pain of what you have caused. There wasn’t anything that you could do or say. 

Things would always remain this way. 

He turned away from you once again, “if I don’t deserve your apology that only proves you don’t deserve my forgiveness.” 

You looked at the clock on the opposite wall, it was now finally thirty minutes past nine and you were due to go home. To be embraced by the comfort of your sheets, to bask in their warmth, something less chilling than his frigid words. 

Grabbing your bag you slipped past him hoping that you would now stoop to becoming nothing but an insipid wallflower. 

Entirely, invisible. That’s all you wanted to be. 

Fucking invisible. 

Your cloak of invisibility was short lived because as soon as you crossed the threshold to your dorm you were met with a crowded living room. Amongst the faceless features of the random strangers spread out in the tiny space you spotted a similar face belonging to the biggest pain in your ass and roommate adjacent, Hobi. 

You trudge through the ocean of bodies, resisting the sway of the waves leading to bump to those in your way, simply wanting to get as far away from whatever this was as soon as possible. When Hobi’s eyes finally met yours you signaled him towards using your pointer finger—quickly, his smile dropped, beads of sweat adorned his temples and his head hung low. 

A party on a Monday was… Definitely, Hobiesque. 

With paced strides he stumbled towards you following you down the small corridor and into your room. Hobi’s eyes hung low, the buttons on his shirt hung open all the way down to the pit of his stomach, his cheeks were red and puffy, his hair the right amount of disheveled, and he had a tight grasp on a nearly empty red solo cup (it definitely didn’t look like it was his first or last drink). The  lights were dimmed but even under the shitty lighting there was a bright glimmer outlining his figure. 

“Now, before we begin this intervention,” his words were a bit slurred, “I had a really shitty day.” 

“Yeah, that makes two of us,” you hung your bag on the hook behind the door and threw your keys on the desk. 

He slumped down on your bed and stared up at the ceiling with a blank expression—you weren’t sure if the shift in his usual energetic charisma was due to the alcohol but you didn’t like it. You were so used to seeing his heart shaped lips spread into wide curves showcasing the amiability of his colorful personality. 

“Okay, which one of us should go first?” he asked. 

“Don’t you have a party to get back to?” you sat by the pillows on the bed, your back leaning against the headboard, your legs pressed up against your chest as you laid your head on your knees. 

“I’ll get back in a minute,” he replied nonchalantly, “just tell me about your day.” 

Hobi laid his head closer to your legs, quickly you found your fingers combing through the dark strands with a thin layer of sweat. There was a cool draft slipping in the room through the window left slightly ajar. The bittersweet flashes of your time in that library behind the main desk played back in your mind. 

“I saw… spoke to Jungkook tonight,” your voice was soft, almost hoping he wouldn’t hear. You and Hobi have been friends since your senior year in school and while he wasn’t there for the horrid days of your freshman year tyranny you confessed to everything you had done during those dark days—everything that happened with Jungkook. 

“Spoke?” 

You nodded. 

“You two have the same work study you’ve spoken to each other before right?” 

“Yeah, but our conversations are always reduced to nonsensical banter. He pushes my buttons and I push his, sometimes we even land a few jabs at each other when the other isn’t looking but today,” you felt at ease sitting there in Hobi’s company, the only noise surrounding the two of you came from the booming of the loudspeaker stationed in the living room, “…it was personal.”

“How personal?” he continued peering up at you with idle eyes. 

“I tried to apologize for, well you know.. everything,” you sighed, “and things didn’t really go as planned. Stupid of me I know.” 

“Definitely, not stupid. You tried to make things right. There’s no harm in that,” his thumb rubbed your hand softly as it wrapped around your shins. 

“There was definitely a lot of harm done.” 

“You’re right,” he mumbled, “what you did is not justified, but all that matters is that you are trying to make things right and we can only hope he is willing to forgive.” 

Jungkook’s vicious words played on a continuous loop in your head. He was not willing to forgive. He never would be and sincerely you couldn’t blame him for him. 

This guilt. 

It will eat you alive and as a result you will experience a slow and excruciating death. A well deserved demise and one that became written in the stars for you the moment you kissed him in that fucking bathroom. 

Still, a timid smile slowly creeped on your lips. Hobi’s hopefulness is your safety net, the only thing you could ever need to keep pushing forward. 

“Enough about me and my self-inflicted issues,” you cleared your throat, “what’s got you so down today, sunshine?” 

“We broke up.” 

You laid beside him on your bed, reaching down taking his hands into yours hoping he’d feel the same deal of comfort you do by him. 

“What happened?” you offered. 

“I was in my dance practice and he—“ he paused, “he just fucking texted me. Said he couldn’t do it anymore.”  

“Did something happen before all of this?” 

“We’ve been on a bumpy road lately,” he hesitated before continuing—you guessed it was because he was trying to structure his thoughts, “two dancers dating bring a conflict of interest into a relationship.” 

“Please tell me you guys aren’t just fighting over your choreography.” 

He remained silent before continuing. 

“You two are going to send me into cardiac arrest,” you shook your head, “I need details, Jung.” 

“Don’t call me, Jung,” Hobi poked out his lower lip, frowning, “makes me feel like I’m in trouble.” 

“I can’t be mad at you when you’re so adorably tipsy,” you pinched his rosey cheeks.

“Stoooop,” he swatted your hand away from his face while stretching out the letter ‘O,’ “I’m being serious though. I think it’s really over between Jimin and I, forreal this time.”

“You’ve said that every other time the two of you have broken up over dance.” 

“Right. .” he yawned, cozying up under your sheets while his eyes began to close. 

“Oh, no,” you smacked him upside the head with one of your cushions, “get up and go host your little party.” 

He brushed it off turning before turning away from you, his soft snores now a remix to the music playing just outside of your door, “who the fuck throws a party on a Monday. . Hoseok, get up!” 

“I know, you’re so irresponsible for letting me throw a party on a weekday.” 

“Bitch.” 

As it turns out, kicking people an hour after a party had started wasn’t as easy as it looked. Leaning against the front door you finally came face to face with the mess left behind. The music still played, though, much lower now and there was an array of empty beer cans, red solo cups and other waste decorating your living room. 

It was as if you were standing in front of the mirror looking back at yourself, you were nothing but a mess of a human being. It was uncanny. 

Although, this mess you could clean, and you would, you weren’t sure if Jungkook would ever allow you to pick up all of those broken pieces that you had shattered all of those years ago. 

For what it’s worth you really wanted to try. You wanted to make things right. 

It is now Tuesday and the weather is horrid. 

The last time you checked, the forecast called for scattered showers and mostly cloudy days. But, now it’s one in the afternoon and as you settle down on the bench by your bay window overlooking the narrow street, the sky was overtaken by the torrent clouds weeping viciously accompanied by the occasional strikes of loud thunder. 

Usually, when the weather looked as shitty as you felt you opted for staying home and becoming enveloped in the comfort and warmth of your sheets, today would have been no different but of course luck is never present in the deck of cards paving your life, also having an irresponsible roommate usually doesn’t help in any way.

“Please, don’t forget my ginger ale,” he coughed dramatically, running his hand through his disheveled hair, “I can’t believe I feel like literal shit.”

“You can’t believe it?” You sneered, “you drank half of your alcohol supply before I even made it home and the party had only been on for like thirty minutes.”

“Fuck, I did that. Didn’t I?” 

“You did,” you playfully yanked your covers off his body, “you drunk fuck.” 

“That was my nickname in highschool,” he smiled. 

“It was,” you zipped up your rain jacket and grabbed the umbrella sitting on your desk, “now go take a hot bath and don’t throw any more parties while I’m gone.” 

You heard his infectious giggles as you closed the front door behind you. The two of you lived on the third floor so the walk down the stairs to the lobby wasn’t too unbearable. Through the clear doors of the main entrance in the rain you saw how the downpour fogged up the path ahead. Namseok’s Kitchen is only a five minute walk, you can do this. 

Walking out you opened your umbrella and stood still for just one minute paralized by the pitter patter of the droplets meeting your umbrella. 

It was the beat to a dreadful song you knew too well. 

You pushed past the blue metal doors of the gymnasium. Your nostrils are no longer consumed by the smell of sweat and dirty laundry and the muffled conjunction of laughter, voices, bouncing balls, and whistles died out the minute the door closed behind you. 

Gym class was a drag and there was truly nothing worse than an hour long class period with sweaty kids in such a tiny space. Usually, you opted for walking on the track for the duration of class but that option became futile the moment it began to pour an hour ago. 

In fact it was still raining, but you stood under the navy awning covering you from becoming soaked. Your eyes are closed and you lean against the red brick wall inhaling the scent of petrichor, the resulting smell of the parched earth just as the pouring rain continues to beat anything standing right below it. The sweet aromas seeped into the air sweeping past your nose with the soft breeze that blew by. 

It was as if the earth had exhaled, emanating its distinct fragrance from millions of pinpoints all at once. Inside that smell, the seconds slowed and each moment seemed to dilute. It filled you with relief.  

Then, suddenly the remnants of your heaven became blurred and the walls holding up the roofs began to tumble down and with it a whiff of nicotine became tangled in your nose. 

Your eyes shot open and there he was, Jungkook. The boy you’d kissed a week ago in the boy’s bathroom. 

“Cigarettes are bad for you, you know..” You felt a knot in the pit of your stomach as soon as he turned. You heard what happened to him but you hadn’t gotten around to seeing him yet, you’d been avoiding him. 

“Yeah, I keep thinking I’ll quit and I can’t seem to make it past a couple of hours,” he was honest and he smiled, two characteristics you thought had died the moment your boyfriend’s fist met his face. He still had a soft purple bruise under his eye to prove it. 

“You need something else to get your mind off of it.” 

He threw the butt of the cigarette on the ground and stepped on it to put it out and leaned right beside you on the wall. Up close you saw a deep gash on the apples of his cheek, it was still red but stitched up. 

“I know.” 

“Are you really littering right now?” You eyed the discarded smoke under the tip of his chunky combat boots.

“Right, sorry miss president of ‘i love earth’ or whatever,” he bent over, picking it up and placing it in the pocket of black jeans, similar to the ones he wore that day minus the rips around the thighs. 

“It’s actually called, ‘advocates for planet earth’ for your information.” 

“I love earth sounds better,” he shrugged, “should consider the name change.”

“I’ll bring it up in our next meeting.” 

“I’m surprised,” Jungkook began, his eyebrows furrowed together and you could tell he was in a mental battle to continue, “that he lets you join cute little nerdy clubs.” 

Twenty minutes before you entered the boys bathroom last Thursday, you and your friends sat in the library during study hall, your homework long forgotten and with continued complaints of loud talking all of you had settled for a game of quiet dare or die. 

The set-up was easy. 

There were two piles out in-front of you, one die, one dare. The object of the game created by your friends was to choose a dare and record yourself completing it before the end of the school day or else you’d have to do something even more embarrassing from the die pile. 

Your dare was to graffiti the side of the school. A bit excessive, compared to the other ones which only called for kissing each other, going against school dress code for the rest of the day or skipping the last period. 

Ditching the crumpled up paper you chose a die deciding that whatever it was at least it probably wouldn’t come at the expense of being expelled. 

‘Kiss Jeon Jungkook (loser)’ it read. 

You could’ve said no but you didn’t. Instead you fed into the taunts of the very boy you’d find your eyes lingering after. The same boy who occupied your thoughts day and night, the same one who kissed you like no one else has and whose touch (though, brief)—permanently marked a trail of goosebumps only he could procure. 

“He doesn’t control me, Jungkook.” 

“He doesn’t,” Jungkook nodded, registering every gravity of your words which felt heavy on his tongue. If your boyfriend didn’t control you then that meant you had also dealt a hand at the countinuously fucked-up encounters between him and your boyfriend. But this also finally cemented the idea that you had kissed him willingly; you saw it in the way his eyes sparkled even when the sun had been hibernating for the duration of the day. 

He seemed to have finally realized that both of those could be true. That love and pain could dance together hand in hand when it came to the two of you. 

Your eyes scanned his chocolate ones, slowly reaching up using the pads of your finger to caress his cheek. They were full and warm and you were careful not to inch too close to the purple and green-ish spot under his eye. 

“Will you believe me if I tell you something?”

“Tell me.” 

“I really did enjoy that day.” You clarified, “our kiss despite what I said afterwards.” 

He chuckled, “hopefully saying me too doesn’t get me another black eye.” 

The tightness in your chest squeezed tighter and immediately you felt like you couldn’t breathe. When Jungkook was around you felt as if your heart and mind collided against each other and you were left in a daze, castaway in your own body and mind. Like, right now, your brain urged you to walk away and get as far away as possible from him but your heart called out to him and down that same path it set out a route leading to his silken lips. 

Your heart beat to a deep crescendo nearly synching to the sound of the beating rain against the awning just overhead. 

“Shouldn’t you be getting back to class?” 

Snapping out of your daydream you replied, “uh, yeah, I should get back.” 

“Okay.” 

“I’ll see you around.” 

Jungkook smiled, “I’ll see you around.” 

The hefty winds blew your umbrella yet you remained in the same exact spot just a couple of feet away from the entrance to the dorm building. You were drenched from head to toe causing your gray sweats and hoodie to stick to you all while they weighed you down. Although you were inclined to move away from the droplets adorning your figure, your legs just would not submit to the command. 

The smell, the dark skies, and the feeling of the rain on your skin all ignited a sense of familiarity, contentment yet melancholiness. 

There were too many feelings jumbled into one. 

“If you stand here, like this, you’ll end up sick.”

You hadn’t realized your eyes were closed until the moment his voice overshadowed the roaring screams of the pouring rain. Jungkook’s outfit mimicked yours slightly but even you could admit he looked much better than you. He wore gray sweats and a gray hoodie draped off his shoulder over a white wife beater. His tattoos peeked through outlining the beginning of the sleeve following the length of his extremity down to his fingers. 

He’s breathtaking, he’s always been. 

“I wasn’t aware that my well-being was any of your concern.” 

Jungkook combed his slender digits through his jet black hair inching closer to you until his umbrella covered the both of you, “it doesn’t,” he said, “ I just figured you were either drunk or too much of an idiot to be out in this storm.” 

“Well, in that case that makes us two idiots standing out in this weather.” 

“I was not out. I’m not crazy,” he cleared his throat, “I just so happen to see you through my dorm window.” 

He came down for you, “yet here you are now.”

“Need I remind you, if I wasn’t, you’d still be out here getting soaked.” 

“Soaked,” you snickered.

“Grow up,” his voice was laced with annoyance but the rose tint on his cheeks told you everything you needed to know. 

“Where did my umbrella even go?” 

He pointed to your feet where your Converse swam in a puddle and there was your unbrella was looking as fucked up as ever. Immediately, you made a mental note to never buy umbrellas at the dollar store ever again. You supposed that’s the only thing you were good at; making one wrong decision after the other. 

You huffed, “ah, I’m okay. It’s okay, I got it from here.”

“Were you going somewhere?” 

“You don’t have to help me, Jungkook,” you didn’t dare look at him because Jungkook was good at one thing, it was peeling back at your layers with his piercing eyes. He made you feel vulnerable—bare. And you always feared the psychedelic enchantment wiring in your brain whenever he looked in your direction. 

Back then that was your excuse for not helping him, for not being a better human being. It was a shitty excuse, you know that now but you always feared your willingness to succumb to your hearts’ cries. 

You feared falling into him—falling for him. 

“Ironic, isn’t it?” He laughed, “just lead the way. I have nothing better to do anyway.” 

“I was just going down the street to Namseok’s Kitchen to get Hobi some chicken noodle soup. He isn’t feeling too well this morning.” 

“That’s only a five minute walk,” he nodded toward the path ahead, “Let’s go.” 

Five minutes felt like an eternity as the two of you walked towards your destination in utter silence. The street was pretty empty—only Jungkook, yourself and the rain remained. . And your thoughts, of course. They ran at record speed as you tried to relive every single moment from your past, you know; divulging in all the good times and wanting to fix every fucked up thing you’ve ever done. 

If only you could turn back time you’d make things right. 

In an attempt to skip another puddle, to prevent your socks from becoming sodden you accidentally moved closer to Jungkook and your elbow brushed against his. The feeling wasn’t foreign to you and it transported you to those nights, all of those moment when your bodies were so close you could smell the soap he’d used that morning, cardamom and vanilla, the scent still lingered around in your nose and you wondered if you were just hallucinating or if he actually still used the same soap. 

“While you order I’ll get us something hot,” he walked you to the glass door of the small diner, then turned towards the coffee shop across the street. 

“Jungkook!” You called out and he looked back in your direction, “Hold on,” you dug in your pocket reaching for a ten dollar bill, “Here.” 

“Just worry about the soup and get one for yourself. Your body will thank you tomorrow morning,” he shouted back. 

He disappeared into the shop as cars sped by in his shadow. You almost didn’t believe he was just right there. With you. Was he?

The bell on top of the door chimed as you walked into the restaurant, the squishing sound of your drenched shoes against the white tile bounced off of the baby blue walls. As you walked closer to the counter you wrapped yourself in a tight embrace to provide yourself with some warmth against the blasted AC. The place has always been light on decoration and made to feel more homey than anything else. There was a faux wall with photographs of customers hanging from loose thread, next to that there was a small circular table where the polaroid and its film was stationed. The remaining walls held all sorts of artworks in different shades of azure from Seokjin’s boyfriend, and Hobi’s brother, Namjoon. Towards the front was your favorite place, a bench stationed in-front of the floor to ceiling glass window. 

Namjoon approached the register, “oh no, what the fuck did he do now?” 

“He threw a party and woke up sick as fuck. I was just coming to get him some soup. He’s said he would puke anything else.” 

“And that little shit made you walk?” Seokjin walked up behind Joon taking a seat on the stool beside him. “Look at you…” he motioned towards you and you took a look at yourself in the circular mirror hung behind the two guys, a fucking mess, “you’re all wet. Did he make you come here alone?”

Before you even had the chance to answer Jinnie continued, “I’m going to kill him. You hear me?” He turned towards his boyfriend, “I am going to kill your brother.” 

Joon mumbled, “I might just join you.” 

“Before your two go on a killing spree…” you leaned against the wooden surface of the counter, “I kind of offered because I felt bad for his dumbass.”

“He still let you come all the way down here in this weather and that is enough to plan a crime,” Seokjin hissed, “Joonie will you get her a towel from the back?” 

Joon disappeared behind the beaded curtain. 

“Okay, so one soup for the idiot and one for you?” 

You nodded, “yes, chicken noodle soup please. Can you make that three though?”

“Who’s the third one for?” He raised an eyebrow staring you down like you had an intimate secret you were keeping from him. Well, technically, you were keeping some things to yourself but you weren’t lying just withholding the truth. It wasn’t the same thing. 

“It’s for the person who accompanied me here today.” 

“And who is that?” Joon asked, they were both overprotective, like older brothers, “you only have one friend and unfortunately I am related to him.” 

“Not a friend. . Just someone I know.” 

They hummed in unison exchanging suspecting looks between one another. Then, the bell on top of the door chimed once again, the same way it did when you walked in. You didn’t need to look to know who it was, his scent gave him away immediately. 

“Hi, welcome to Namseok’s kitchen,” Jin greeted him. 

“Hey,” he walked deeper into the restaurant until he finally stood right next to you as you continued drying off, “here. I got us lemongrass tea. I didn’t know what you like so I figured I get you the same as me.” 

Grabbing the to-go cup from his hand, you reply, “yeah, I like lemongrass tea.” 

You took a sip, basking in the heat of the piping hot liquid as it traveled down your throat and into your tummy. A tired whimper escaped your lips,  as you became entirely immersed in the flavors of the lemony taste exploding on your tongue. There was silence around you but you could feel three sets of eyes on you and instantaneously your eyes shot open. 

“I almost forgot Jin, Joon, this is Jungkook. Jungkook, this is Jin and Joon, Hobi’s brother and brother in law.”

“Nice to meet you.” 

“You, too,” Jinnie smiled in his direction and Joon followed suit, “Jungkook..” He repeated, “why does your name sound so familiar?” 

“I went to highschool with Hobi and..” he pointed at you, avoiding even the utterances of your name. There was no disgust lingering in his face but then again his expression was unreadable and you were sure he was masking his true feelings at the expense of the two men in front of you. 

“I knew it,” he clasped his hands together but as soon as you saw the thoughts wiring in his head and connecting together you shook your head to prevent him from continuing. Thankfully, he understood immediately, “yeah, I thought I had seen you before.” 

Jungkook also connected the dots because Jin hadn’t been in high school at the same time he was. Jinnie was three years older than you guys were and by the time he and Hobi had moved into town Seokjin had already graduated. But he was now aware that you had mentioned him in passing—now he knew that you had to have mentioned something about that time. 

“I’m going to go check on those soups,” Jin announced walking back towards the kitchen, “Joon, come on join me.”  

You walked past Jungkook with the brown cup held tightly in your grasp before taking a seat on the bench by the front window. The storm still ran rampant outside and the streets remained barren. Jungkook sat two tables down, near the wall, far away from you. 

“Do I owe you anything for the tea?” You mumbled holding up the cup in his direction. 

“I told you to not worry about it..” 

“I didn’t know Seokjin would bring that up,” you didn’t look at him, eyes lulled by your dusty white converse, “I didn’t know he would remember you.” 

“Just forget about it,” he shook his head, “you don’t need to explain.”

“No, I feel like I do.” 

“You don’t.” 

“Jungkook, please let me,” your eyes watered and your voice faltered. 

He sighed, taking a small sip of the tea before continuing, “please don’t explain. I don’t need an explanation. I have buried it all, it still lives in my head but it’s buried and I don’t need to resurrect the tsunami of emotions that comes along with that..” he pointed at his temples, “it’s still here but please do not awaken them. I don’t want to brush the brush off of those memories.” 

You two were the only people in the shop but you knew Joon and Jin were behind one of the walls eavesdropping. It was silent and the only noise in the small space was the whirring of the AC. 

“Are our good memories also buried somewhere?” You knew better than to ask but you needed to know. 

“I put those to rest first,” he admitted and your heart sank, “those memories, although good, were an incitement to everything else that lingered right behind. I had to get rid of those memories to get rid of everything else.” 

“Okay,” tears were beginning to swell up in the corners of your eyes and you tried your best to blink them away, “yeah, that’s okay. I understand why you had to do that.” 

“I’m sorr—” Jungkook began. 

“Don’t, please, you’re not the one who should be apologizing to me. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I let you do that.” 

The bell at the front desk chimed, ripping your attention away from Jungkook. Seokjin stood behind the counter holding two paper bags, “order’s up.”  

Walking up you thanked him and grabbed the bags, “thanks. I’ll have Hobi venmo you for this.” 

“Don’t even worry about it,” he smiled softly, “free lunches till you guys graduate remember. That goes for you too now, Jungkook.” 

“You don’t have to do that.” 

“I want to,” he handed him the smaller bag, “I mean it. I better see you around here more often.” 

“Thank you,” he smiled brightly, the kind of smile you hadn’t seen him wear in years. It was radiant and lit up his face with warmth. The indents on his cheek were deep and they framed his rose lips like they were a work of art. Not even the silver hoop piercing his bottom lip shone as brightly as he did when he smiled. You almost forgot how good it looked on him and you couldn’t help but stand there and admire him taking mental pictures to keep forever. 

He deserves someone better. Someone who’s going to make him smile like that until the end of time. Someone who wasn’t you.  

“And thank you for coming along with her since Hobi couldn’t.”

“It’s no problem.”

“I would offer you guys a ride back home but Jin and I walked to work today. Guess we didn’t really think things through either.” 

“It’s okay, Joon,” you zipped up your rain coat and pulled the hood over your head, “it’s only a five minute walk back.” 

After thanking Jin and Joon, the two of you exited the store and cut in through the alley way before landing on the road leading back to the dorms. Once again, the two of you stood dangerously close to one another radiating off each other’s body heat and before you knew it the building came into view and Jungkook led you up the walkway leading you to the main door. You didn’t want to let him go. You didn’t want him to leave you but it’s not like you could actually say that. 

You were a mere burden jumbled into bad memories and the worst years of his life.

“Thank you for coming along,” you pushed the thoughts although you don’t think you could ever really get rid of them. 

“No thanks needed. I couldn’t let you take the trip on your own, especially not in this weather.” 

He couldn’t let you. Your heart began to race as you tried to keep yourself from reading too much into his words. They probably didn’t mean anything… But what if he still cared? What if Jungkook still cared about you? 

“See you around.” He nodded before heading off in the direction of his dorm. 

I shouldn’t have said anything.

You turned around, but Jungkook was no longer near. His back was turned in your direction as he continued trotting down the sidewalk. Great! Now you’re hearing voices, after reaching for the metal door handle the voices reappeared. 

 Our memories are flavored in bitterness but I still can’t get her off my mind.

Jungkook was gone. 

The thing about rumors is that they spread like wildfires and no matter how hard you work to extinguish that fire it is always too little too late. That’s how you felt as soon as you crossed the threshold from the bathroom and into the congested hallways. Everyones prying eyes read you so intently condemning you for the hypocrisy of allowing someone like Jungkook to permanently ink his lips on yours. The passionate dance the two of you composed left behind the imprints of his lips as he tattooed your skin with each one of the pecks he left behind.  

Your phone buzzed in the back pocket of your jeans. You pulled it out, unlocking it, quickly seeing the photo your friend had snuck of you on his lap pop up. Your mouths devour one another and your bodies pressed together closely while your hand rests on his shoulder. 

You wanted to frame it—live in the pixels of that picture forever. 

‘Death complete bitch.’ Your best friend’s text read below the photo, ‘I can’t believe you actually kissed him.’

‘I can’t believe I did it either.” 

‘What was it like?’

The worst part about it is that it had to come to an end. Your mind traveled an hour back and you recall the velvet feel of his lips as they moved against yours mimicking the softness of clouds. At the sametime his tongue was saccharine tasting of the sweetness of strawberries and maple syrup leading  you to guess he had either waffles or pancakes for breakfast that morning. 

All you wanted was to run back into that bathroom. 

‘Nothing memorable. Just glad it’s over.’ 

‘Don’t worry you won’t ever have to kiss him again.’

Yeah, that was the fucking problem. You wanted to kiss him again, preferably you wanted to kiss him forever. 

‘Yeah, thankfully.’ 

You didn’t know when that kill switch that made you a complete and utter bitch was flipped on, but all you remember were those calamitous days when you didn’t really know who you were and who you were meant to be. Those days were marked with pen squiggles, they were blurred and you chose to permanently turn the light off and lock the door behind you in that section of your brain. 

Middle school was rough to say the least. But that was the beginning of your novel and you knew perfectly well who you were now. 

You had the friends you did because they made you look good, you had the clothes you did because you had a reputation to uphold and you had the boyfriend you did because someone like you is supposed to be with someone like him. Those were the simple unspoken rules of high school and at first they  were easy to follow until they weren’t. 

Everything was simple until that summer before freshman year. The day you visited the park near your house and you spotted him, with his chunky black boots and signature black outfit matching his jet black hair. The two of you were only fifteen then but he already had a tattoo on his wrist peeking out of the sleeve of his crewneck, back then he didn’t have his lip piercing—not yet at least. 

“I thought you only hung out in abandoned buildings and sketchy alley ways,” you remembered telling him that and the two of you spent hours on those swings talking the afternoon away. Back then, you learned Jungkook was a gentle giant disguised in an intimidating disguise. He was thoughtful in the way he looked at life and dreamt about the future, he was caring in the way that he spoke about nature, tattoos, music and everything else he held a deep passion for and lastly, he was attentive in the way he listened to you thoroughly drinking in every detail you had shared.

That was the Jungkook that made you fall for him in the blink of an eye but back then you didn’t know who he was and you were certainly not made aware of how things would end up. 

 The bell dismissing you from your last period class snapped you right out of your thoughts and you dashed out the door of the classroom wanting nothing more than to escape home and be left alone to bask in your thoughts. 

“There’s a fight outside!” a few students called out running past you. 

“Let’s go!” someone else yelled across the hallway. 

You were nervous to ask but you did anyway, “fight? Who’s fighting?”

“Your boyfriend’s fighting someone,” a girl you didn’t quite recognize replied, “Jungkook, or something like that I think.”

By the time you made it to the parking lot there was already a crowd of people forming a circle around both boys. Jungkook held his bloody nose while your boyfriend clenched and unclenched his hand, likely to relieve the pain of hitting Jungkook. You ran in their direction but as you neared them you saw as the boy you called yours landed another punch on Jungkook’s face causing him to fall back on the concrete. 

He didn’t fight back, didn’t even respond to the other boy’s insult. He just sat on the ground holding his face waiting for it all to be over. 

“Hey,” you finally reached him, shoving him back to prevent another callous attack on the boy behind you, “what the fuck are you doing?” 

“I saw the fucking picture,” he muttered through gritted teeth. 

“The girls and I played a game of dare or death,” you explained, “it was only part of the death I had to complete. It didn’t mean anything.”

He lunged towards you and poked at your chest, “you still kissed him.” 

The crowd went silent and your boyfriend’s anger highlighted the very thing you’d intended to place under lock and key—your pretty little secret no longer a secret or even pretty for that matter. You felt light headed and you weren’t sure if it was the punishing rays of the sun or the mental strain this was all causing. 

You didn’t regret that kiss; you never would but you also thought that picture would stay between you and your friends.

A wave of murmurs swayed all around you and you knew your reputation was descending by the second. 

You didn’t dare look at Jungkook, you knew his hypnotizing dark eyes would make you crumble. Seeing him like that. . The way he did all helpless and unprotected would compel you to care for him and cradle him in your arms until nothing or no one else could hurt him, “It meant nothing. Okay?” You heaved, “It meant nothing.” 

Instead, you were dragged away from the boy your heart screamed out for. 

Fuck, do I still like her?

Just shut up, Jungkook. It’s too early for this. 

I shouldn’t be asking myself that. Ever. 

Presently, you’ve gotten to know Jungkook for being reserved and fairly quiet, similar to how he was in high school except back then he actually spoke to you. But now, he is quiet and he doesn’t bother uttering a single word in your direction. The only times he ever addresses you is when he throws continuous jabs at you, landing every single one—he spews spiteful words of retaliation as a result of the shitty person were years ago and although you knew it was well-deserved that didn’t mean it hurt any less. Unlike his recently reserved outer shell, you quickly learned Jungkook’s mind traveled at the speed of light and for two days now, you could hear the constant battles of  thoughts breaking out in his head. 

Words crashed against each other; phrases were left abandoned half way through and ideas were left unfulfilled. 

You groaned smacking your silk pillow over your face, your mind was exhausted on overdrive and increasingly overheating all because Jungkook couldn’t ease his thoughts and empty his mind at five in the fucking morning. Who. . Thinks this much at such ungodly hours of the morning, the sun isn’t even up yet. 

The scattered clouds invaded the dark blue sky dusted in shades of purple. 

Does she think of me? 

I do. 

Did she ever feel what I felt when we kissed?

I did—I do. I still feel it. Similar to how the sun feels on you on a hot summer day, the sparks on their ignited route as they traveled through every single inch of your skin setting it alight even today. You felt it then and you could feel it now. 

Finally, his thoughts ceased and you guessed he’d probably drifted off into a slumber. He probably looked so peaceful you thought, grabbing one of your extra cushions, laid on your side and placed it in between your legs like a mommy pillow. Sleep came knocking on your door and your eyes began to feel heavy. 

Jungkook probably looked like an angel as he slept. You could picture him laying in a sea of his messy sheets against his golden tone. 

By the time you woke up once again, it was nine in the morning and the sun peeking in through the windows ripped you right out of your sleep. 

Your room door burst open, “hey! I knew you’d be awake. What do you have planned for the day?” Hobi took a seat on the edge of your bed. 

“Whatever happened to knocking? I could’ve been naked you know..” 

“We’ve seen each other naked plenty of times.” 

“Fair enough,” you laid facing the ceiling, “I wasn’t going to do much today just going to check Mr. Kim’s list. He posted it on the bulletin outside his class for our upcoming project.” 

“Do you want me to make you something to eat before I go?”

“I’m okay. Thank you, though.” 

He planted a soft kiss on your forehead, “I’ll be in the dance studio. You wanna come see me later?” His heart-shaped lips did very little to cover his pearly whites as he grinned, “I’ll give the front desk your name so they can let you up when you get there.” 

“Please, don’t forget like last time or I’ll have to fight someone for real this time,” you said. 

“Won’t,” he called out as he strutted towards the front door, “I promise. See you later.” You heard the door open and shut before you began falling asleep once again but the peace and quiet was very short lived because you heard him again. 

What did I even dream about?

You wondered the same. Was he the type to dream up cute scenarios in that pretty head of his as he drifted off for the night? Did your face invade his mind in the late hours of the night? You hope you did. 

Your name echoed in the basis of his mind followed by the emission of thunderous groans. 

He seemed. . frustrated. 

Ah, fuck. Yes, Jungkook just imagine it’s her. 

The image in your head was impure as soon as  you finally realized what Jungkook was actually doing. You’d imagined his hand disappearing under the base of the pyramid forming through his duvet. Stroking himself slowly, his head lolled back against his headboard, sweat glistening on his chest and forehead, while his eyes fluttered closed as his eyelashes batting away all reminders of reality. 

I want her touch—need it. So bad. 

You’d become too enthralled in the symphony of Jungkook’s whimpers that you hadn’t really noticed the death grip you had on your bed sheets as your knuckles turned white and the way your legs rubbed against each other in a desperate plea for some friction. 

This was private. Jungkook needed privacy and while your mind opened a portal which prevented that, the best thing you could do was ignore him and the sensual persuasion laced in his bedroom voice, no matter how desperately he called out for you, it wasn’t right. 

Ignore. 

God, I would fuck her so good. 

Think of something else. 

With my cock buried deep inside of her. Fucking her into my mattress until she’s shaking with the overbearing stimulation of pleasure. Until, even her own name becomes a mere afterthought. 

You grabbed your phone from the night stand but your lame attempt at a ‘distraction’ was useless. His words were addictive and you were already soaked right through your panties. Your sheets began sticking to your sweaty skin while Jungkook’s ardent words continued heating you up. 

She would take me so well. Fuck! 

A shower! That’s what you’d do—just take a cold cold shower to ease those thoughts and shut him out until he finally finishes. 

You hissed as the hard pressure of frigid water hit your body from the shower head, even this wasn’t enough to mask the way your body shuddered as Jungkook continued. It was even more enticing that after everything—after his hostile gazes and cold words your face was in the forefront of his brain as he touched himself.

His alluring thoughts kept on playing one after the other and your cunt became the victim crying out to him with patterned pleas he would never hear. Your juices strolled down your inner thigh mixed in with the streaks of water and you could no longer bear the desperate thumps of aching cunt. You were going mad, honestly his stamina and self control were all to blame. The combination was torturous.  

While you weren’t one hundred-percent sure of what he was doing the way his thoughts became sporadic weathering winds of pleasure and then tranquility. It was a cycle, he would be on the verge of succumbing to his peak and then all of the sudden he would stop. Before beginning once again and again and again. 

The viciousness of his desire lasted until right around the time you turned the shower off and you couldn’t tell if for the past twenty minutes you had been in your own personal heaven or hell. 

I hate how much I still want her. 

I hate that I can’t have her. 

You can have me, Jungkook. You can have me now, tomorrow and forever.  

The heat was overbearing and you could feel the way your tank became soaked with sweat and the thin fabric stuck to your body. You heaved as you pushed open the glass door into the English building. Mr. Kim’s room was on the third floor and the bulletin board was stationed right next to his door. After opting out of climbing three flights of stairs you ride the elevator up and exit out to look at the posted partners for Mr. Kim’s upcoming project. Walking down the main hall you turn left and there it is—there he is. 

The simplicity of his outfit was composed of a plain white tee, gray sweat shorts, and over the ankle white socks tucked into black slides. The colorful ink adorning his skin still peaked under the sleeve of his shirt, his black wavy hair rested on the nape of his neck. 

The hallways were completely empty and his back still faced you so you kind of just stood there unsure of what to say or do. I mean you’d heard him masturbating just a few hours ago and while you truly did not mind even the slightest you weren’t quite sure how to even interact with him moving forward. While he seemed to despise you for the events that unfolded back in high school this morning was a complete change of events. His voice was dipped in sex as he moaned your name until he finally came. 

God, why was it so hot in here? Is the AC really off mid-summertime? 

“Hey,” his doe eyes stared at you, studying your off-putting exterior. Your eyes were blown wide, your tank was still soaked with sweat and you just stood there ogling him, “are you okay?” 

He stepped towards you with worrisome eyes. ‘Oh yes Jungkook, I’m okay. I’m just picturing the way your hand climbs up and down the length of your dick, head tilted back, mouth slightly opened as groans form at the root of your throat. You know, the way you probably looked this morning.’ 

Instead you decided on a soft, “I’m okay.” 

“You look like you’re about to pass out,” he placed his hand on your shoulder and you nearly fainted at the intense heat emitted from his skin to yours, “here, sit down,” he guided you to one of the lounge chairs sat opposite Mr. Kim’s class, “have you drank anything today?” 

How could you kindly explain that was not the kind of thirst you were looking to quench. 

“No. .” you shook your head.

“Okay, okay,” he grabbed a water bottle from the black backpack sitting at his feet. You hadn’t even noticed it before, you had been so focused on him the entire time, “here drink some.” 

The bottle was half empty meaning his lips were on it and now your lips would be on it too. This wasn’t really what you meant when you said you wanted to feel his lips on yours but you didn’t really mind either. 

“Yeah, sorry, I got thirsty on the way here,” he scratched the back of his neck, “I can get you one from the vending machine.” 

You must’ve been looking at the bottle resting in his grasp like an idiot, “no, it’s okay Jungkook,” you rested your palm on top of his hand, “it’s not like we haven’t kissed before right?” 

His eyes turned a shade darker than their usual brown and he cleared his throat, letting go of the water bottle right into your grip, “right.” he stepped back as if you were a cactus ready to nick him with one of your spines, “I was looking at the list for Mr. Kim’s class and we are partnered together with Jimin for the project.” 

“Okay, should we meet at my place tonight or tomorrow? This is due this Monday,” you took a sip of the water tasting the remnants of Jungkook’s strawberry chapstick left behind on the rim. 

“I have a basketball tournament due tonight but we can meet tomorrow if you’d like.” 

“Tomorrow,” you repeated, “any time?” 

“After four?” 

“See you then.” 

For the first time in forever Hoseok had actually left your name at the front desk of the studio on campus. After being left up you walked in through the double doors of the dance studio where the music blasted at highest volume and your best friend’s shoes squeaked against the shiny wooden floor as he moved throughout the room swiftly executing his choreography with perfection. Hobi was a force to be reckoned with and dance was his element. 

“You’re here,” his professional and focused aura peeled back as soon as he saw you enter the room, “I need a break anyway.” 

You sat on the floor with your back resting against the wall of mirrors. 

“I’m here and I cannot believe I witnessed such perfection,” you clapped your hands, “I still cannot believe my best friend is talented enough to finally snatch me away from poverty.” 

“You know I got us,” he sat beside you before laying his head on your lap. He was covered in a thin layer of sweat from head to toe, “but let’s not forget you chose to be poor.” 

“I didn’t have much of a choice. I can’t really help having idiotic parents,” you shrugged. 

“I know baby,” he cooed. Hobi was quiet which was definitely out of his usual nature where he radiated a blinding luminescent orb around his being. He fidgeted with the strings on his sweatpants and opened his mouth only to say it again. 

“Hoseok, you’re anxious and it’s making me anxious. Just say what you need to say.” 

You combed your fingers through his damp hair, “I saw they, your parents, left a voicemail for you last week. Did you ever get back to them?” 

“No,” you sighed, “and I don’t think I want to either. Everything they tried to do and were willing to do was truly wicked and unforgivable.” 

“You never told me what happened.”

“It involves Jungkook, of course, and everything we did while in high school, Yeonjun’s party the summer before senior year.” 

“The one he threw the week before school started?” 

“Yes.”

“To this day I still can’t remember shit about that night.” 

You chuckled, “a lot of our classmates don’t remember that night at all but I do. I remember every single detail.” 

He didn’t say anything so you continued. 

Yeonjun’s lake house was like a maze. There were numerous narrow halls with an array of doors carved on each wall and it was the same for every single corner you’ve turned into so far. The little bit of alcohol you had began clouding your mind and you felt more intoxicated than you actually were. Your kitten heeled black sandals clacking against the hardwood floor sought a way out of this elaborate labyrinth and back to what you originally came for. 

The music playing just a floor below faded as you traveled deeper and deeper into the second floor, although you could still feel the booming bass vibrating right under your feet. 

You just needed a bathroom—not because you actually needed to use it but because you needed to take a minute to yourself. . to breathe. Every other corner of this house including the back and front yards and even the fucking lake are already invaded by massive seas of drunk teenagers. Their voices were too loud, the music was headache inducing and the atmosphere adopted a stench of sweat and b.o. 

After ditching the red solo cup on a nearby console table, you leaned against the off-white walls closing your to block out the dim lights making you a bit lightheaded. 

Seriously, who even had this many fucking rooms in one house. You mumbled. 

Sure, your family was wealthy but you were nothing like the Choi family. Your parents were both doctor’s devoting their time to the tiny private practice the two of them founded but on the other hand Yeonjun’s family came from a long lineage of  businessmen and they practically owned a handful of the businesses for miles and miles around. 

You weren’t jealous of all of the extra zeroes attached to his parents’ net worth, you and your own lived comfortably enough to not have any financial complaints. However, his parents were more liberal and they didn’t clip his wings. They weren’t clingy or demanding and they certainly did not push anything on him that he didn’t want to do. Your parents were not this way, they were controlling, and they told you what to do and eat, who to hang out with and date. With covetous thoughts you wondered if there would ever be a point in your life where you could feel as free as Yeonjun did. 

Maybe now that you’ve turned eighteen things would be different. Doubtful—your birthday was a month ago and nothing has changed. Unfortunately, you still lived under their roof and relied on their money. 

You removed your shoes and hesitated whether to travel back down stairs and out somewhere into the depth of the forest but immediately erased the thought from your mind as you looked down at your bare feet, mini skirt and crop top. This wasn’t really an appropriate outfit to go off exploring the woods in the middle of the night. 

The minutes continued ticking by and finally you spotted a door at the end of the opposite hallway with a vertical rectangular piece of frosted glass cut right down the middle. Your feet traveled down the heated floors before your hand reached out for the black knob; turning it slowly. 

It was a rooftop balcony. 

The railing was wrapped in garden lights, while two sets of black cushioned reclining beach chairs sat around a propane fire pit. There was a massive grill to the other side, a bar that would put a nightclub to shame and a huge patio furniture set. 

Your eyes thoroughly scanned your surroundings before landing on the boy leaning against the rail staring at the idiots swimming in the lake below. For the first time since you met him approximately four years ago his legs were exposed under the light washed knee length jorts, he wore a white t-shirt and a pair of black and white checkered vans. Still, right up the alley of what his style embodied but you had to admit you missed his signature chunky boots. 

He still hadn’t noticed you so you walked up slowly, “I never thought I’d see you at a party like this,” you whispered in his ear before jumping right beside him. 

The moon rays reflected a twinkle in his dark eyes, “Yeonjun and I are cool.” 

“So, why aren’t you down stairs?” 

“Why aren’t you?” his gaze traveled from your black painted toes all the way up to your eyes as if he was studying you intently. 

“Too crowded,” you shrugged, “and not enough room to breathe.” 

Jungkook looked ahead, his vision once again consumed by the dark green and brown shades of the dense forest once again, his side profile put artworks all across the world to shame. 

“Yeah, same,” he added, “I’m gonna let you in on a little secret but parties aren’t really my thing.” 

“No way. . I’ve seen you at every party for the past three years,” he dramatically rolled his eyes at the sarcasm in your voice and you chuckled before continuing a bit softer, “is this your first one?” 

Jungkook nodded, “first one I’ve been invited to and the first I’ve ever attended too.”

“We’re breaking records tonight aren’t we.” 

“I guess I’m feeling a bit audacious.” 

You sneered, “audacious? Big word.” 

“Don’t tell me you think I’m stupid like the rest of our classmates. .” 

“I did my internship in the main office last year which included sealing report cards and sending them off,” he walked to one of the chairs and laid on it placing both of his palms under his head. Was he flexing? Couldn’t be. “You’ve practically taken every AP class offered at our school and aced all of them too. It’s a miracle how you have managed.” 

“What can I say?” he smiled and his cheeks rose like two loaves of bread in an oven, “I’m all brains baby.” 

“Brains and beauty,” you corrected. 

“I can’t also be ‘beauty’ when you’re here; living, breathing, being,” Jungkook is the personification of all of your desires and his aura worked hard to draw you closer and closer in his direction no matter how hard you worked to stay away, for his sake. Even when you tried to repel away from him the gravitational force he exuded called out your name and your tympanum became inundated by the wails of his being. 

Only he lived in your thoughts. 

The video-like memories you have shot of him throughout the years loop in your mind day and night. It was dizzying but you didn’t want it any other way. 

“You are beautiful,” you let your thoughts roll off your tongue freely—too tipsy to care and too enthralled by his striking features to lie about what you truly felt. What you’ve been working so hard to suppress for the past few years. You were tired of hiding, so fucking tired, “with your big beautiful eyes, and your cherry lips and rosey cheeks and all of these tattoos,” you carried on, “oh, and those piercings. Don’t you know that Jungkook?” 

He was flushed and his head became tilted down as he played around with the silver rings on his fingers, “know what?” 

“That you are more beautiful than life itself.” 

Jungkook scooched over on the chair and patted the empty space beside him inviting you to sit near him and you did. He laid on his side while his face rested on his left palm. 

“Are you drunk?” he asked. 

“I only had two sips of Hobi’s drink,” you looked up at him through your eyelashes, “I’ve been on cranberry juice most of the night.” 

“So this is not a case of drunken words you’ll forget once the sun comes up?” he leaned in closer and you could see the faint freckles dancing on his cheeks and on the bridge of his nose. 

His eyes sparkled projecting bright constellations never before seen in the heavens, “I could never forget anything about you.” 

“You know I can’t believe that right?” 

“Why not?” 

“Because you’ve forgotten about me for the past year,” he smiled devilishly, “you haven’t spared me the time of day. I’ve missed your sneaky glances. The way you’d drop your pencil half way through algebra just to bat those pretty eyelashes in my direction kind of like you are now.” 

“I didn’t do that just to look at you,” you clutched the thin gold chain hanging from his neck, guiding him closer to you, “I was just genuinely clumsy.” 

“I’m just saying it’s funny how the pencil always fell in my direction,” 

“Forget the pencil, Jungkook,” shivers cascaded down your back as his lips hovered over yours—his breath fanning against them. The aroma of lemon, and mint, with woody and balsamic undertones tickled your nostrils. 

Jungkook shook his head, his eyes remained on your lips as you swiped your tongue along them, “it’s not about the pencil?” 

“It’s not,” you added, tucking the few strands of hair that framed his face behind his ear. You just wanted to lay there with him forever, to be consumed by the warmth of his embrace, to lose yourself in the tenderness of his kisses, to wake up next to him tomorrow and also every single day after that. 

“So just admit you wanted to lo—”

You lips landed on his and finally you remembered just how magical kissing Jungkook was except unlike that day in school the bathroom, today, it wasn’t a game. You were there on your own free will and you didn’t care who was around to see. The only concern clouding your mind was how much more of him you craved. The way your mouths moved each other made you feel inebriated, even more than alcohol ever could and you weren’t afraid to admit his lips had you addicted. 

The silver metal hoop hung onto the corner of his lip felt cold, but so good in comparison to his heated kisses. Despite where you were or how many people currently invaded Yeonjun’s house it felt like you and Jungkook were the only two people on the entire planet. Just the two of you with your lips dancing on each other with the moon and the stars baring as your only witnesses. 

Jungkook pulled away slowly—panting slightly, “please shut me up like that more often,” he held your face, resting his forehead on yours and pecking your lips continuously, “tell me you’ll do it. Tell me you’ll always kiss my stupidity away.” 

You nodded, “Jungkook, how about I kiss you like that always and forever. Not only because of your stupidity as you call it but just because.”

“Are you trying to confess something?” 

He sat across from you on the beach chair taking your legs onto his lap, his soft hands massaged the soles of your feet. You swallowed back the guttural groan riding up your throat melting deeper into the chair due to his therapeutic touch. His fingers moved higher and higher up the length of your extremities, halting right above your knees, yet he continued kneading his fingers into your skin. 

“Tell me.” 

You hummed. 

“I need you to be an open book with me. What are you looking to confess?” 

Your eyes remained closed as he continued touching you gently—almost feather-like, “Jungkook, I can’t really think when you’re doing that. .” 

“Should I stop?” 

“No, please,” you pant. 

He continued kneading your thighs, “tell me.” 

From the tips of his fingers currents of electricity trickled onto your skin, “ah, fuck. .” you breathed, “I like you Jungkook. I like you. Okay?”  

Hobi sat up beside you, now leaning against the mirrors as well. The sun has begun its journey towards the horizon and its rays peaked through the slightly drawn blinds,  “wait so you guys. .?” 

You nodded but said nothing else. That night had been a secret between you and Jungkook. 

“On the roof of Yeonjun’s house during our senior year back to school bash?” The surprise in his tone was evident but you weren’t taken back by it all. 

“Yes,” you smiled faintly, unwilling to hide the giddiness you felt from the memories of your time together from Jungkook, “it was our little secret. We swore to each other we wouldn’t  say anything to anyone. That’s why I didn't mention anything to you before but obviously someone saw and word got out that same night.” 

Hobi sighed, “don’t tell me another fight broke out between him and your dumbass ex-boyfriend.” 

You shook your head, “this time it was different. I wasn’t scared of what others thought anymore. In that moment I decided I would stop caring. I wanted to stop hurting him,” your clammy hands began to shake slightly and Hobi placed his palms on top of them to stop their trembling, “that night after the party we rode around all night aimlessly. Enjoying each other’s company and truly I was the happiest I had ever been all my life. Everything went to shit as soon as I made it home and walked in through the door. My parents waited for me to get in, they sat me down and began rambling about my change in behavior and how different I had become.”

He hummed and you took that as a sign to continue. 

“As soon as I sat on the chair that night they slid over my mom’s phone and there was a picture of Jungkook and I kissing on one of the longue chairs. I swear I had dejavu from freshman year.” 

“Did you ever find who took the picture?” 

“I never did but I always figured it was one of my ex’s minions or something,” you shrugged, “to be honest, trying to figure it out was the last thing on my mind. They started talking and talking rambling on about my personality change and rebelliance and how Jungkook was the cause of it or some shit.” 

“How did they even come up with that?” 

“I asked myself the same thing,” you snickered, just thinking about it even now makes your blood boil, “but it didn’t matter. Being eighteen didn’t matter; they just wanted to keep us away from each other at all costs. They made all types of threats to make me press charges and file a restraining order which I obviously refused. Then, they vowed to make his life hell if I didn’t stay away and I didn’t want to find out what they meant so I decided to comply and stay away.” 

“Okay, now I’m beginning to understand why you moved in with my family half way through senior year,” his thumb rubbed circles on the dorsal side of your hand, “were they mad when you left? I used to ask my mom if your folks ever reached out but she always avoided the question.” 

“They were livid but nothing they could ever say or do would ever make me stay in that place.” 

“Did they manage to leave Jungkook alone?” 

“Well, after the big cut-off Jungkook and I were never able to find our way back to each other,” your voice was low, almost as if you couldn’t hear yourself it just wouldn’t be true, “and I moved in with you and your mom and I completely blocked them out of my life.” 

“Good. I’m glad you ditched them,” he pinched your cheeks, “you deserve better than them and their money’s no good to you anyway.” 

“I just wish I would’ve kept in contact with him. Maybe tell him what was going on or something,” you scratched the back of your neck obviously frustrated at your lack of communication skills as a stupid eighteen year old. You were such an idiot—why couldn’t you open your fucking mouth? 

“We all make bad decisions at one point in our lives but you had no choice, baby. You were sandwiched into the wall one bad choice up against another. You made the best decision you could with the circumstances at hand,” he snuggled closer to you, wrapping one hand around your shoulder, “don’t beat yourself up over it please.” 

“I love you. Seriously, I don’t know what I would ever do without you.” 

He kissed your forehead, “I love you more.”

Today Jungkook’s highway of thoughts has eased and though you liked how calm the morning has been you also kind of missed the feeling of his lingering presence—almost as if your own shadow was missing. 

You despised waking up towards the early hours of the afternoon but today you couldn’t seem to peel yourself out of of your bed, until finally you couldn’t fathom the idea of napping your day away—plus couldn’t do that even if you wanted to because Jungkook and Jimin would be over in about thirty minutes to begin working on Mr. Kim’s project. 

Jimin had been the middle man in this entire set-up, he had both of your numbers so he took it upon himself to text the two of your separately (because he knew you and Jungkook were physically impossible of initiating a social exchange amongst yourselves), and get you both on board with a neutral territory to meet at. Of course, Jimin’s idea of a neutral territory involved a place where he could catch glimpses of his ex strutting around which meant your apartment was his ideal meeting spot and although his thoughts hadn’t revealed anything so far you just knew Jungkook wasn’t ecstatic about this whole arrangement. 

After taking a quick shower, getting dressed and setting up a plate of sliced fruits and a couple bags of snack size chips and cookies you heard a light knock on your door. 

Taking a deep breath you turned the knob before pulling the door open. It was Jungkook and as always he looked breathtaking. You were beginning to think comfort was his go-to because yet again, he wore sweats and a simple t-shirt—tattoos still peeking out at you, his bottom lip still pierced with the same small silver hoop, hair half up half down and his book bag slung on his left shoulder. 

Removing his headphones he stared back at you as you continued ogling him, “hey. .” he greeted in his deep tone. 

Why is she staring at me like that? 

Do I have a stain or something? 

He looked down at his shirt but when he saw nothing he just stared back at you tilting his head slightly. 

“Hi,” you stepped out of his way and he finally crossed over the threshold into your apartment, “you’re the first one here so we’re just waiting on Jimin to make it before we begin. Please sit anywhere.” 

He nodded. 

The apartment wasn’t necessarily big but it wasn’t small either. An open floor plan made up the space between the kitchen and living room area with a rectangular island separating the two rooms. Immediately to the right of that was the door leading to Hobi’s room, then your room sat at the end of that hall just a couple feet away and the bathroom was just across from your door. 

Yet even as you walked towards the kitchen and Jungkook made strides towards the love seat in the living room you felt like the two of you were cramped in a tiny box with the temperature hiked to the highest setting. God, there were about a million things you could say or offer him but nothing could ever mend his broken heart and that was enough to keep your lips sealed tight. 

Where the fuck is Jimin? 

I don’t know if I can be here alone with her for much longer. 

And it’s so fucking hot. I’m gonna pass out. 

Fuck, you knew it. He’s upset. Though you already figured coming here was probably  hard for him, you didn’t imagine it would hurt you as much as it did to actually know how much he despised being in your vicinity, but it did. 

Jungkook sat rather stiffly on the couch, bag still slung on his back as if he was ready to leave, staring off into the distance while his leg bounced up and down anxiously. Strolling past him silently you nearned the thermostat and cranked the AC up higher.  

That’ll literally fix nothing at all. 

You turned around taking a seat on one of the accent chairs near the row of windows on the opposite end of the living room. If it wasn’t for the invasion of his thoughts, the silence would be killing you softly. 

“Have you heard anything from Jimin?” he finally looked in your direction but not into your eyes instead they lingered lower—in the direction of your legs. The hunger displayed in his eyes took you back to the night before when he moaned your name so sweetly. 

“Nothing,” you tapped your screen to show him the lack of texts and placing the phone back on your thigh, his gaze followed almost like he was hypnotized. 

You would give anything to hear him just one more time—Fuck, just once more. 

He cleared his throat, snapping out of those sinful thoughts cooking up in your head, “yeah, same. And I’ve texted him like three times.” 

“I’m thinking that little shit bailed even though he planned this whole thing,” you were scared to form your thoughts into actual words, “do you want us to start or would you rather wait for him?” 

He breathed out almost exasperated—damn, you should’ve kept the suggestion to yourself. You were about to take it all back but then he finally spoke up, “We’re both here now. I think we can begin and then fill him in. . If that’s okay with you.” 

“Yeah, I think that’s the best we can do,” did he just willingly comply with staying alone with you, “I’ll go get my notebook. Gimme one second.” 

“Okay.” 

Right. . Okay. Just here to get our work done. That’s all. That is all. Yeah. 

You sat beside him on the couch startling him just a bit—he seemed tense, “so we’re supposed to pick a movie, and match no less than three scenes to at least one of the emotions listed.” 

“I say we do the very minimum and pick the movie I’m sure we’ve all watched,” he asked, unzipping his bag and pulling out his notebook. 

“Titanic?” you asked. 

“No, The Blind Side,” he scoffed, “do we really want to sit here for one hundred hours just to recap the eternity that is Titanic?” 

“But the emotions for Titanic are so easy to dissect; we have happiness, love, and jealousy right off the bat,” you argued, “the assignment is practically done for us already.” 

“Yeah, but everyone’s going to do Titanic. We need to stand out. Be different.” 

“It’s an intro to writing class. I vote for taking it easy, weren’t you just moaning about taking it easy anyway?” your tone was a bit condescending you’d admit but the way he scanned your figure was addicting. There was nothing you craved more in this world than to have his gaze drink you in as if you were his favorite drink. 

“I wasn’t moaning.” 

I was last night though. 

You swallowed hard, biting your tongue and holding yourself back from going along with begging him to moan the way you’d heard him do so the night before. His husk groans so low and sweet, so fucking sweet, “But you were.” 

“It was a suggestion. There was no moaning involved.” 

“Well, maybe if you did moan I would cave and take your suggestion,” the words rolled off your tongue before you could ever stop them. 

He smirked, “so you just wanna hear me moan.” 

Don’t smirk. 

Eternally mad at her, remember?

The internal conflict raging within him gave you at least a little bit of hope. As you mapped out the field of his thoughts you figured he wanted nothing to do with but distance himself; to be cold and standoffish but he also revealed he wanted you. He wanted you near—to hold you, kiss you, touch you. 

It was confusing and headache inducing but you liked that you still lived in his mind the same way he lived in yours. 

You shrugged, “maybe I do.” 

“Please, don’t,” his eyes finally met yours. 

Look away. 

But he didn’t and you were glad he didn’t. 

“Do you want me to beg Jungkook?” you purred low and slow—the translation intended was desperation and you hoped he understood exactly what you were hinting at. You were tired of hiding behind your emotions. 

She’s a fucking pied piper and I’m the snake hyptonized by sweet song and mindlessly slithering towards her. 

Yes, Jungkook. Come closer, come to me. If only he could listen to your thoughts, this would be a whole lot easier. 

Fucking one way telepathy. 

“Uh,” there was a mere blank look plastered on his features. His pupils were blown and a soft tint of rose dusted his cheeks. It was as if your words had sucker punched him and he was still processing the hit. 

You moved closer to him on the couch, placed your hand on his thighs to balance yourself as you drew closer to his ear, “please, Jungkook. Please, I need to hear you moan again.” 

Fuck. 

Fuck! 

He groaned and the honeyed husk tone sent a trail of goosebumps up your thighs resulting in your panties becoming moist, “please.” 

“Jungkook, I want you,” it was the first time in years you’d heard those words adjacent to his name and fuck did it feel good. 

Fuck it. 

His calloused hands were now on your waist and he began guiding you to lay on the loveseat before your hand landed on his chest to stop him. 

“I said I want you,” you sat him back down before kneeling in-between his legs. The fit of his sweats got tighter, lifting and taking on the shape of a tent, “you didn’t reciprocate the sentiment so that means I’m in charge here today.” 

Tell her. It’s easy. 

Tell her you want her too, you fucking idiot. 

He never vocalized it but you didn’t mind—knowing the thought pranced around on his mind was more than enough for you. 

“Are you okay with taking these off?” he complied, taking his sweats off swiftly, letting the pool at his ankles. Jungkook is fucking big and you were taken back by the sight, “good boy,” you cooed. 

His head fell back on the headrest while his eyes were shut tightly and his breathing became uneven. Oh! He likes that. He likes being called a good boy; you made a mental note to call him that again if you find yourself in a similar predicament. 

You raked your nails along his inner thigh, “Jungkook?” 

He hummed. 

“What do you fantasize about?” you laid your head on his thigh, his dick just a couple inches away from your face and truly all you wanted was to take him all in your mouth. 

“Alot of things.” 

You reached up, taking his length into your hold and he winced at the contact as you began moving your hand up and down once and once again, “I need more details than that.”

“I think of. .” his words became jumbled in his throat as you continued your very mellow and teasing touch, “of you doing, ah fuck, of you doing all these things to me.”

You clicked your tongue and shook your head at his semi-confession, “Jungkook, have you touched yourself while you think of me, hm?” 

Of course, you already knew. You’d heard it yourself but you just loved seeing him become so affected and so sensitive as a result of your lewd utters. 

Your palms traveled up to his pink tip and began rubbing circles with your thumb painting it white with his precum. 

“Good boys don’t touch themself.” 

Jungkook’s mouth remained agape but there were no words communicated instead he formed a sort of soft whimper, and that was the kind of motivation your body needed to go into overdrive. 

You wanted. . No, needed to rid yourself of these suffocating ass fucking clothes, you needed to touch yourself—to release that tension aching so painfully in between your legs. But you didn’t. Today was not about you. 

“I know. .” he groaned, digging his nails onto the black leather couch, “but when I have you invade my thoughts,” he paused looking for all of the right words, “I just can’t control myself.” 

“Hm, seems like I have a lot to live up to compared to your fantasies,” you kissed the head enveloped in your hand before swiping your tongue along his shaft and he hissed. 

His saccharine noises should be made into a playlist so that you could be able to replay them over and over everywhere you go but especially when  you lay under the covers of your bed in the late hours of the night. The only thoughts occupying your mind would be the compositions of his lustful cries as your fingers worked diligently to get yourself off. 

It was so tempting to just allow his hands to continue traveling down your stomach and waist, a few more inches and his fingers could be at the exact location where your body screamed out for his attention. 

You wanted it so bad. 

You tutted while clicking your tongue, “sit back, Jungkook,” you removed his warm feeling away from your lower back and placed them on his knees before patting them softly, “and keep your hands to yourself. Yeah?” 

“It’s really hard to,” he said, “nearly impossible when you’re working so hard to get me off and you’re just sitting there squirming whenever I talk about touching you. Cause the thought has lingered around in your mind, right?” 

“Jungkook, this is not how tonight is supposed to go.” 

“Then, how is it supposed to go?” 

Your hand began moving up and down his cock, pumping him once again before you felt the corners of your mouth beginning to sting as you wrapped your lips around him. It was painful. . Good painful though. With each passing second you bobbed your head on his cock working to take him inch by inch but no matter how much you tried, it was nearly impossible. 

His hand snaked around your neck aiding you, sinking himself deeper into the warmth of your mouth. With strings of saliva streaming down your chin, puffy lips, heated skin and a sort of fucked out look in your eyes you continued the repetition. 

Seeing him lose himself under the ministrations of your touch and mouth was overwhelming and drove you to the verge of nearly succumbing to the peaking orgasm lurking close by. Instead you diverted your mind to what you were doing instead of what you felt. Placing one your hand around the base of his balls massaging them into your touch, while you put firm pressure with your thumb on the perineum—and that’s when you saw the explosion of fireworks erupt in his eyes while his thighs began to shake. 

Fuck, fuck, fuck, Her mouth is—fuck! 

“I’m so close,” a needy whimper escaped his lips, “please don’t stop. Don’t ever stop. Please.” 

You complied, nearly choking on his cock. The feeling of being nearly rid of your ability to breathe was addicting and yes, if tonight were to be your last day on earth it would be a pleasure to die with Jungkook’s dick in your mouth. 

“I’ve been a good boy,” he cried out, “can I please cum?” 

Been such a good boy. So good. 

You hummed in approval right before he spilled into your mouth and you swallowed every bit of it before turning to see his splayed out body—all limp and tired. 

After wiping the corners of your mouth you sat beside him on the couch. Your knees were red and stung just a bit but honestly you could do it all over again—all night if you could. Slightly, opening his eyes he looked down, placing a kiss on each knee. 

“I never thought we would-” he paused momentarily, “we would do something like this ever again.” 

“Really?” your voice became hoarse, “because I’ve thought about it for a long long time now.” 

“You have?” 

“I have,” you continued, “and I’d like to think you do as well but if you’re ever ready to actually admit what you truly feel you know where I’ll be.” 

I do want you. So bad. 

And my feelings for you have always remained the same. I still have feelings for you, I feel everything for you. I always have and always will. 

He didn’t say a word but simply offered a sly smile before slipping away to get himself together in the bathroom. 

… But you were not disappointed. 

He needed time and that’s okay. You’d be more than happy to give him the time to dissect this peculiar relationship the two of you have. . developed. It’s the least you could do after all these years. 

In your heart you just hope he finds his way back to you. 

“So you sucked him dry and then you both continued to work on the project like nothing happened?” Jimin asked; his head laid on Hobi’s lap. Yes, they were back together. This was apparently the reason why he had missed the project session the night before.  

“We were kinda forced to when your ass was MIA from the very meeting you set-up.” 

He rolled his eyes, “nobody forced you to suck his dick.” 

“Fuck you, Jimin.” 

“Why don’t you begin by fucking Jungkook instead.” 

“Jungkook and I aren’t fucking anytime soon,” you sighed spinning around on your desk chair. The ceiling seemed to come crashing down on you even as you thought of gravity of your fucked up reality, “it’s like I can feel that he still feels something for me but he just won’t vocalize it.” 

Hobi caressed the apples of Jimin’s pink cheeks, stroking them lightly with his thumb. They were the picture perfect image of love—whenever they were not fighting of course. 

“So you sucked his dick at the expense of what?” Hobi inquired. 

“I really just wanted him in my fucking mouth,” you shrugged not really wanting to scramble for any other explanation because the truth of the matter is all of you would always calls out for Jungkook whether you wanted to or not. 

“Oh, baby,” Hobi abandoned his place on your bed and kneeled in front of you holding your hands in his, “while I support all forms of slut revelations and tendencies as your best friend it is within my obligation to require you to tend after your heart.” 

You nodded. 

“Jungkook is alluring, captivating, mysterious and absolutely handsome—” Jimin cleared his throat behind him, but he ignored his boyfriend and proceeded, “and the two of you have a lot of history both good and bad but you have to understand what happened in the past is yesterday’s event. Jungkook can break your heart or hurt you in any way and it’ll be just as fucked up no matter what happened between the two of you back in high school. Okay?” 

“Okay,” Hobi was right but how could you shut out the part of your brain which justified every single way Jungkook could tear you apart? Underneath the spark; shining bright in your eyes every single time he appeared in your line of vision you knew you deserved his wrath for every inconvenience you had a role in while inserted into his path. 

“Don’t just say it. Mean it.” 

The room felt smaller, suffocating, colder and Hobi’s words rolled around in your head in every single direction. The three of you were sprawled around your full bed watching a random movie Jimin had picked out. You sat up against the headboard while the two of them laid on their stomachs facing the television hung on your wall. You weren’t alone but your bed felt empty and as you looked off to your right you couldn’t help but be transported back to last night when you and Jungkook finally settled on the Titanic.

The tragic telling of two people who found their way to each other against all circumstances and the barrier of societal norms and expectations that stood in-between them. Of course, aside from Leo unnecessarily dying in the final act this could be a retelling of pinpoints on your relationship with Jungkook. You liked each other, your parents were against it, you lived in the moment and you let your heart lead a way here and there but as soon as the iceberg (your parents, your ex, and even you) became introduced as the antagonist the two of you found yourselves swimming in an ocean of heartbreak and despair. 

You would always assume responsibility for every single way you hurt Jungkook in the past but if one thing must be crystal clear is that you also love him. You did back then and you do now—the only difference is that back then you were looking to please all of those around you and you suppress your feelings in the deepest pocket of your heart but you wanted to liberate it all. You were finally ready to listen to your heart.

It was a composition to a beautiful song, one so loud it courses through your very being, awakening your nerves and causing your thoughts to explode into a frenzy. 

You wanted him here with you. Snuggling into you sharing longing looks and deprived touches. 

You wanted him to be open and push all of his fears away. 

You wanted him to realize that you were different now. Things were different and you would treat him so well. 

I need to talk to her. Yeah. 

Almost as if his brain and his phone were wired together you heard a ding go off right beside you. 

‘Hey, can we please talk?’

Your heart sank because in your experience that sentence never led to a good thing. Never. 

‘Sure. When are you free?’

‘Right now.’

‘Hobi and Jimin are home. You can come over if you don’t mind some company or we can meet somewhere else?’

‘Come to my apartment in 5.’ 

‘K.’ 

Jittery was the exact word you’d use to describe Jungkook at soon as he opened up the door to his apartment and stepped aside to allow you in. The length of his finger had a slight tremble and his eyes were blown wide. 

You hadn’t really seen him like that in a while. 

“Jungkook, are you okay?” 

He nodded, “yeah, just a bit stressed with everything going on plus I’ve had like five energy drinks in the past five hours.” 

“What’s got you so stressed?” you asked standing before him, you felt hesitant to sit anymore. I mean you did have his dick in your mouth like less than twenty-four hours ago but you didn’t want to push it and you certainly did not want to invade his personal space. 

“Too many things, honestly. School for one. .” he ran a hand through his hair taking a brief second to determine exactly what he wanted to reveal to you, “work study plus now I'll be co-coaching the swim team as well.” 

“You’re headstrong Jungkook,” you offered, “I’m sure you’ll do amazingly even with this hectic schedule you are so determined to take on.” 

“I went to this psychic once and she told me my ambition to take on everything would lead to my demise,” he chuckled airily, “I’m beginning to think she was right.” 

“Psychics are bullshit. Who says you can’t have cake and chocolate ice cream too?” 

“Right,” you hadn’t noticed before but casual was Jungkook’s new staple. Seems like he has drifted away from his black boots and particularly dark toned outfits. You liked that version of him quite a lot, although you hadn’t really shown it in the past. However, you also liked the version of him standing before you where he maximized comfort and migrated to mostly tones of white, gray and nudes, “of course you would make that comparison. Cake and chocolate ice cream have always been your go to dessert combination.” 

“Isn’t it everyones?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged, “for example my nutritionist might say it’s too sugary.” 

“Well, fuck the psychic and that nutritionist of yours too,” Jungkook’s laugh is just like the rest of him—inviting, sweet and genuine. When he laughs, it’s addictive enough to make you want to make him laugh again and again, just so you can hear that sound and see her giggly smile as much as possible, “forreal, but also just remember you gotta just live in the moment, don't worry about tomorrow or even yesterday. Today is all that matters.” 

“I definitely agree but funny enough I kinda wanted to talk to you about what happened last night..” He cleared his throat, “on the couch of your apartment. Well you and Hobi’s apartment.” 

You looked down at your dusty white converse before finding his eyes once again, “what exactly did you want to talk about?” 

Go on. Go on. 

“We’re good right? Are you okay after—well, you know,” was he worried about hurting you after you suck him off yesterday? God, you could suck his dick all over again and then once more after that or preferably until your jaw locks and your knees dissipate. Though, that still wouldn’t be enough to extinguish the burning desire in the pit of your stomach. 

“What exactly are you asking?” you took a step towards him, “shouldn’t I be the one making sure we’re good especially considering all of our history together?” 

“Forget that.” 

Don’t bring it up, please. Just forget about it. 

“I can’t Jungkook,” you sighed, “I wanna make sure we’re okay and I wanna apologize for what happened. Please, let me do it. I don’t want you to resent me for the rest of your life because of it.” 

“There’s no need to. I forgave you long ago. The cold stares and snarky comments were always just a front,” he confessed, “I forgave you the second after everything went down.” 

“And I thank you for that but I still need to do this. I need to get it off my chest,” you reached for his hand; the warmth of his hold settled your nerves and finally you were able to go on, “Please, forgive me Jungkook. For going through with that dare and kissing you in the bathroom. I did want to kiss you but I should’ve never let them take a picture; it only made things worse for you. I’m sorry for not comforting you after your fight with my idiot ex, although I wanted to. I was scared but you were too and it was my fault so I should’ve been there. I’m sorry for ghosting you after we spent the night together at Yeonjun’s party—my parents, they gave me an ultimatum and I was just a high school senior still very dependent on them and I know that’s not an excuse but I managed to make it one back then. Most of all I’m so fucking sorry for not reaching out to you sooner and making things right. I just hope it isn’t too late now.” 

His hands abandoned yours and instead he leaned over before cupping your face, “I told you already. I forgave you for everything a long time ago.” 

“I appreciate your kind heart and forgiving nature, Jungkook,” you leaned into his touch, closing your eyes in the process, “but still I needed you to know how truly sorry I am.”

“Please, stop apologizing,” he sighed, “the past is the past and you have no reason to be apologizing to me right now.” 

“You keep saying that but I did and I do,” Jungkook’s stare was comforting; his eyes felt like embers burning your skin under the sun rays shining bright during the mid-afternoon sun, “and I will continue to do so at any given minute. I need to make up for all of that lost time—every single minute; every hour I’ve let you slip through my fingers. You deserve to be treasured, loved and cherished for the rest of your days and I will do just that if you allow me to.” 

“What exactly are you asking me?” 

“I’m simply asking that we allow things to ride out and perhaps the tide might just take us somewhere beautiful.” 

He giggled, “do these sonnets just live in that pretty little head of yours?” 

“My head is more than just pretty,” you challenge. 

“I know that,” this is the giddiest you’ve ever seen Jungkook be. In recent times he had adopted a sort of hard shell, which he often wore like a shield but today as he leaned on his kitchen island with his head propped up on his palms he looked elated, “I just like the way you describe the potential of there being an. . us.”

“Do you like it enough to give things a chance? Maybe even go on a date?” the tremble in your extremities gave away just how truly nervous you felt, though you tried your best to hide it. You’d never asked anyone out before but for Jungkook you were willing to make the first move. 

She’s so poetic with her affinity for love. I like the way her eyes light up when she talks about us being together. 

“How about tomorrow?” 

“I’m free tomorrow.” 

The following day was a blur overshadowed by a nimbostratus cloud which swept in a vicious squall with gusts so powerful your room was left a literal mess as you spent hours prior to Jungkook picking up frantically looking for the perfect date outfit. 

Now, you sat in your little casual red dress in the passenger seat of the car Jungkook borrowed from his best friend. Your balmy sat atop your thighs and you tapped your fingers lightly on your heated skin. 

The night sky was beautiful—drowning with a million of bright stars and a moon so illuminating it spotlighted your path. Nightlife here roared with vibrancy and the sidewalks were congested with people bar hopping or looking for dinner spots among other things.  This scene had great capability in finally claiming your attention away from Jungkook and his sinful thoughts but it was hard. Every single image Jungkook painted within the beauty of his mind blasted in your head seemingly like a framed art piece in a gallery. Except, the only difference was that roaming around a museum was peaceful, whereas Jungkook's wandering thoughts made you quiver and sent glacial shivers down your spine. 

For the duration of the ten minute car ride he’s use the weapon known as his mind and managed to peel your clothes off, re-imagining the way your mouth moved on his cock, then, within seconds he painted a picture of what it would be like to fuck you against the hood of his car. You’d admit the depiction of you against the cold metal bumper with your dress hiked up to your waist, while he pounds into you relentlessly really was more than enough to ignite (with the man sitting behind the wheel; eyes hyper focused on the road ahead; and his tattooed knuckles gripping the steering wheel), about a million fantasies you wanted to fulfill with his assistance. 

But the urge to have the heat of his touch roam every inch of your body became abated when Jungkook parked his car and you found yourselves sitting across from each other in the red booth of a seafood restaurant on the pier. The incandescent bulb overhead did very little to irradiate the space between you and yet Jungkook still looked as radiant as ever. The muffled and incessant chatter of the patrons scattered throughout the establishment became similar to the buzzing of bumble bees and truly you weren’t really too sure you could make out conversations they engaged in. 

You were kind of nervous and although you’d hope it wasn’t too obvious you couldn’t help the way your eyes scanned the room and your body failed to comply with the simple order of sitting still. 

“You look beautiful tonight,” Jungkook sat up on the leather seat and looked off outside the glass window drinking in the vicious waves as they crashed against the golden shore. 

You look beautiful every single day. 

“Thank you,” you smiled, “I see your signature black boots have finally made a comeback,” you followed his eyes out to get a view of the roaring sea, “I thought you might’ve grown out of them.” 

This look—tonight was the epitome of teenage Jungkook core and you couldn’t help but savor the brief stroll down memory lane. Of course, back in high school you’d always had a tiny little crush on him and while you worked to get over it; that was not an issue today. You were gawking—practically drooling at how amazing his biceps looked under the sleeves of his white tee, his black jeans hugged his thick thighs and his hair was tied half up half down and of course those damned black boots. 

“They’re my secret weapon. I just keep them in the back of my closet for special occasions.” 

I also know they were always your favorite look on me. 

“In that case, I’m honored that a night with me is considered a special occasion enough to bring out the boots,” Jungkook finally turned towards you, his eyes shining bright like jewels even in the shitty lighting. 

“I figured it fit our little slice of history perfectly.” 

“Don’t tell me these were the exact ones you wore that day? 

“They are the exact same ones.” 

“I thought you would have gotten rid of them with everything that transpired,” you whispered; talking about the past still felt taboo. 

“I contemplated that many times,” he shrugged then proceeded in a timorous voice, “but I just couldn’t. There is an abundance of bad memories attached to them but the memory of my first kiss trumps all negatives.” 

“Your first kiss?” Your shock was evident and for a second you had to look around just to make sure you weren‘t too loud but the people around the two of you were too into their own conversations. They were oblivious to the little corner you and Jungkook occupied towards the back of the restaurant—in your own little world, “I-I was your first kiss?” 

He nodded before taking a small sip of his water. 

“Jungkook?” 

He looked at you, “what?” 

“Are you being one-hundred percent serious. . I was your first kiss?” 

Jungkook pressed his lips into a tight line causing his cheeks to become impaled by his chasmic dimples; then, he closed his eyes briefly before taking a deep breath, “I was a loser in high school. Of course, I was spared a few friends but in the ‘love’ department I was lacking severely so naturally no one was ever interested in pursuing anything romantic with me. Until, that afternoon when the girl I’d been crushing on finally walked up to me in the bathroom.” 

“If I could go back in time and embrace the feelings that I had for you, Jungkook just to tell you how I actually felt I’d do it in a heartbeat,” your heart beat rhythmically in your chest and quickly you began feeling fatigued as if your air supply would be cut off if you didn’t peel back every single one of your layers and confess exactly how you felt. 

“If I could go back in time and tell you what I actually felt despite the consequences I’d also do it in a heartbeat,” he murmured, taking your hands in his. 

“Good evening and welcome to Under the Sea, can I get you started on anything tonight?” the server approached. Her hair was tied up messily and she wore a black polo and black pants while carrying around a small notepad and pencil in her hand. She seemed friendly but a bit overwhelmed—though, you couldn’t really blame her, this place is leaning a whole lot towards chaos. 

“Yeah, we’re ready,” Jungkook said, a fib of course, the two of you had been too busy talking to scan the menu before she came over, “I’ll take the Cioppino. Anything looking appetizing to you?” 

“I think I’ll take the Paella.” 

“And for drinks?” she asked scribbling away on her notepad. 

“I’ll have a Coke.” 

“Same here,” the two of you handed back the menu, “thank you.”

“I’ll be right back with your drinks,” she smiled before walking off towards the kitchen. 

The rest of the night at Under the Sea was brief and while you and Jungkook indulged in small talk here and there the two of you were starving and more concerned about getting something in your stomach. After leaving the busy restaurant Jungkook led you in the opposite direction of the parking lot towards the small park across the street from the beach. Right under the live oak tree there was a blanket laid out with numerous flameless candles flickering their feeble light around the very spot. As you got closer you noticed the basket sitting next to the blanket on the grass and the rose petals scattered around. 

“Jungkook. .” You became stunned at the attention to detail of the man before you. Everything looked so beautiful, “you did this all? W-when did you even have the time to set this up?” 

“I set everything up before our date and I know some of the workers from the restaurant and asked them to check in every once in a while and bring our snacks out like five minutes ago so nothing would spoil.” 

“You prepared snacks for us?” 

“More like I cut-up some fruits.” 

“In that case I’m judging your knife skills.” 

“Not too harshly though,” he tittered softly and airily. It mimicked the comforting tunes of lullabies, “come one, let’s sit. I have some things lined up for us tonight.” 

You sat beside him on the velvet fabric, you folded your legs to your side and used one of the spare blankets to cover your lap. Before you there were two medium sized tabletop easels and a selection of paints and brushes. 

Jungkook removed the white button up he’d left unbuttoned and kept on the white wifebeater. For the first time you finally had a full view of his sleeve; on full display. The black traces filled in with colorful shades adorned every inch of his right arm all the way down to his wrist. You had the urge to reach out and trace every single pattern but you held back—you and Jungkook were good but this is the beginning stage; first you have to dip your toe in and test the waters. 

She’s staring at my arms. . Be calm. 

Don’t flex. . Don’t flex. 

Dammit. 

He flexed, reaching up to brush a stand of hair back and out of his face. 

You smiled, “so, what’s supposed to be our inspiration for painting tonight?” 

“Each other. You paint me and I’ll paint you.” 

“Jungkook, I’m a lousy painter,” you whined. 

“The point isn’t for it to be good,” Jungkook began brushing soft strokes on the canvas, “it’s about the creative process. . the ideas that your mind interprets into art.” 

“That’s easy for you to say,” you scoffed. 

“Art didn’t always come easy to me.” 

“How did you know this is what you wanted to do for the rest of your life?” you finally picked up a brush and squeezed a dash of paint on the wooden palette, allowing your hands to work freely—to create. 

“The first time I drew anything for others to see was in high school,” his eyes were gleaming with thoughts of reminisce, “Ms. Julie, reached out to me sophmore year, said she needed my help designing the yearbook cover for the seniors that year.” 

“I remember the cover that year,” Jungkook looked over at you and there was a layer of joy featured on his face, “it was absolutely beautiful and I also remember every single cover after that being just as amazing.” 

“Thank you,” his cheeks were a crisp crimson now, “I designed all of the year books every year after that as well. Actually, I still help Ms. Julie from time to time even now.” 

“That’s amazing. It’s truly a gift that your hands possess and I’m so glad we get to see what they create.” 

Jungkook stopped his movements all together, his gaze no longer set on the easel, instead he looked downward, his cheeks still burned bright, maybe a little more now than before and by the paced heaves of his chest he seemed to be calculating his every breath. 

“Thank thank you,” he stammered. 

“And just so you know I intend to shower you with compliments, so get used to it.” 

He beamed, “what about you?” 

“What about me?” 

“What are your passions?” 

You shrugged, “Hm, I was never really good at anything back in highschool and while I knew I had to do something. I had a really tough time figuring things out.” 

“But then. .” 

“Then, I did an internship at the daycare on campus the summer before classes started and I realized how much I love being around all of the kids,” you said, “and at that moment I automatically knew what my major would be, come the fall semester.” 

“Funny how life works right?” 

“One-hundred percent.” 

The cool draft of the expeditious night swept by softly allowing you to leave behind the once scorching afternoon. Right now, you became a resident in your very own slice of heaven and in your head the only people around for miles were you and Jungkook. For the past thirty minutes, the two of you haven’t crossed many words, you were too focused on contextualizing the perfect artwork—one that’ll remind him of you wherever he sees it. 

Now, you were not an artist by any means but you tried nevertheless. The best interpretation of him you could come up with was to depict the sheer contrast between the different versions of himself. 

The two were slightly different yet when meshed together working symbiotically to make Jungkook the perfect mixture of tranquil, mesmerizing and lulling all in one. 

Your canvas was split in two—one side you painted baby blue with music notes substituting the clouds in what would be the bright afternoon sky and and a lousy excuse for a guitar sitting on the bottom. This was the version of him that lived inside and the one only a few people got to see. His mysterious aura and great passion for music. Then, on the opposite side you painted a black background in combination with it there was an abundance of colorful art supplies scattered all throughout. This one represented what he chooses to show and what many saw on the outside on his day-to-day course. 

After some finishing touches you moved back on taking one last look at your work, “okay. . Here, I tried my best but it’s not your face. Just some things that remind me of you.” 

“Let’s see,” he hummed excitedly, waiting for you to turn the canvas around. 

“Be nice, okay?” 

“I will, I will.” 

When Jungkook was excited there were a lot of distinctive actions that communicated with his body and expressions. His eyes lit up like the explosions of fireworks on a summer night; his shoulders were raised up past his jawline and his cheeks burned bright. 

“It’s not good, okay,” you beamed at his cheerfulness; it was cute how thrilled he was. 

“It’s perfect,” he leaned closer to sneak a glance, “come on. Let me see.” 

“Fine,” turning the canvas around felt like an invasion of privacy, although everything on it was solely about him, it was still like a clear window into your soul and how you saw him. 

You’d never been this vulnerable before with anyone. Never. 

He scanned the explosion of colors sitting in-between your hands. Jungkook’s lips curved up while the corners of his eyes wrinkled in amusement. 

“This is amazing and absolutely the best depiction of everything I love.”

“Don’t lie to me, Professor Picasso.” 

“I don’t lie about art,” he reached for it and you placed it in his hands, “and this is a masterpiece.” 

You scoffed. 

“I’m serious,” he argued, “this is going up on my art wall. Front and center.” 

“This better be the only thing on your art wall,” you muttered. 

Jungkook finally grabbed his canvas holding it close to his chest. . Well, as close as he could due to the wet paint, “Here’s mine.” he still had not turned it around for you to see. 

“You know you actually have to turn it for me to take a look.” 

He chuckled, “I know but nervousness is contagious. . Just gimme one second.” He took a deep breath before slowly turning the canvas in your direction and there you were. Same facial features, hair style and red dress you had chosen for the night. The talent his fingers convey is jaw dropping. It is evident Jungkook is an amazing artist through and through. 

“Jungkook. .” You knew he was good; you’d seen the covers he had designed for the highschool yearbook back then, still, that didn’t prepare you for this in the slightest bit to see yourself from his point of view, “I don’t have an art wall but this will definitely be the beginning of one in my apartment.” 

He guffawed while passing his painting over. 

“I’m serious,” you continued, now closely examining his precise attention to detail. He got every single attribute down to the smallest scars and birthmarks, “your talent is impeccable. Just look at how amazing this is.  It’s actually not fair at all. I want mine back.” 

“No way! You can’t take back gifts you have already given away to someone.” 

“Yes, I can,” you argued, “especially if my gift looks like shit next to yours.” 

“It most definitely doesn’t. I already told you, I love it and it’s going up on my wall and there’s nothing you can do about it,” he leaned closer, placing a soft peck on your forehead and clutching the painting tight in his grasp. 

You groaned admitting defeat, “but I am expecting a lot more paintings from you.”

“Always.” 

Of course. As long as you’re beside me, and even if some day for some reason you aren’t, you’ll continue to be my muse forever. 

His muse. You love the sound of that. 

The sound of the pouring rain beat rhythmically on the glass window. For the next few hours your bed was your haven and Jungkook’s bare arms were your form of a warm blanket.

Although the clock on your night stand marked four o’clock, the day was as dark as night and as the sun refused to come out to play the dark nimbus clouds invaded the stretch of the expansive sky, refusing to allow even a single ray of light to illuminate your bedroom. 

The power had gone out but the two of you had lit up some candles in various locations of your room. You were both in your underwear, semi-sticky with a thin layer of sweat coating your entire body as a result of the air conditioner no longer being on. 

Even in the heat the two of you couldn’t untangle yourselves from each other. 

“We’ve been laying here in the heat for hours,” his fingers raked over your shoulder and down to the middle of your back. 

“There’s nowhere we can go to cool down for the day. I’m afraid these four walls are it for us today,” you complained. 

“And moving will only make us hotter.” 

“I think the two of us being tangled up like this is already making us hotter.” 

His hands tightened around your waist, “yet there’s nothing you can say to let me go.” 

“Then, it’s a good thing I don’t want you to let go,” you crossed your arms on his chest and laid your chin on them; looking up at him through your lashes taking in his figure as he laid back against the headboard. 

“Why are you looking up at me like that?” he asked though his eyes were still closed. 

“I just like having you. . here.” 

“In your room?” he asked. 

“In my life,” you confessed, “I guess I never thought we could make it here again.” 

“I had faith—hope. I knew that eventually we would get to talk and forgive each other.” 

Every fight and every bicker was a call to drive you closer to me. Immature I know, but it was all I could do and say to get close to you. 

“You didn’t do anything wrong to me, Jungkook,” you traced lines over his collarbones leaving before sparks of electricity; you felt as they traveled down to the tip of your finger, “if anything I was constantly praying you’d forgive me.” 

Forgiving you was the easiest thing I’ve ever done.  

“I walked away after Yeonjun’s party,” he caressed your cheeks with the pads to his finger, “that was my worst mistake and I knew exactly how it looked too; like I just hit it and quit it.” 

“You didn’t hit it and quit it, Jungkook,” you sighed, “I did that to us. I was the one who walked away from us. None of it was your fault.” 

“But I let you walk away. I didn’t fight for us.” 

“Hey,” you cradled his face in your hands, “I didn’t let you fight for us. This is on me.” 

But I never went searching for you. I just let you—walk away. The night you got up from that longue chair on the rooftop of Yeonjun’s house I thought that was our beginning; I just never thought it could be our end instead. 

“It’s on us,” Jungkook leaned into your touch, softly moving his cheek against your palm, “but we can only work to overcome our past. . Together.” 

You held onto the gold link looped around his neck, clutching it in order to pull him towards you until finally your faces were just an inch away from each other, “Together.” 

“Kiss me, please,” his breath fanned across your lips as you continued guiding him closer and closer to you—his eyes were closed once again and he completely succumbed into this trance of your navigation. His lips were warm and velvet; parting slowly before they landed on yours. You became lost in the way your heartbeat continued beating faster and faster. The soft ballad of the steady thrumming tickled your ears and along with the taste of his mint lips on yours you began feeling a bit faint. 

The room was still hot, the power was still out and you still sat on Jungkook’s lap but now you became exhilarated riding off the feelings in the way your body connected. It wasn’t just the kiss—no, it was also the way his electric touch began tracing the lines outlining your body, traveling down between your breasts, then down your stomach and up your sides until they rested on your hips. Jungkook’s fingers teasingly toyed around with the elastic waistband of your panties, rubbing small circles on your lower back. 

You were breathless pulling away from that kiss but in between breaths you managed to pull his forehead against yours before allowing yourself to speak one again, “Jungkook, can I tell you something?” 

He nodded. 

“I-I want you, Jungkook,” your brain felt like it melted right into mush and there were no coherent thoughts in your head that didn’t revolve around Jungkook. 

You were dickmatized. Yes, you were. 

“You have me.” 

“I want all of you.” 

“Take it all,” he whispered. 

Do anything you want to me. Do everything you want to me. Do whatever you want with me. I am yours for the taking. 

You felt the beads of sweat strolling down your body accompanying the slight tremble in your every movement. Still, you moved with the facade of faux confidence and soon you found yourself straddling his thigh, sinking down against his heated and sticky skin. Indulging in a steady pace you began moving back and forth against his thigh all while holding onto his shoulder for support. Jungkook’s head fell back against the wall but his hands never left your waist guiding your movements to the quickened beat of desperation. 

“You look so pretty riding my thigh. You know that?” he smirked; his cheeks were the tone of wine. Jungkook bit his lip to maintain focus on the sloppy motion he continued to maneuver. 

You hummed entirely consumed by that heated feeling in between your thighs—entranced in the way his soft whimpers only guided you towards that very place where you could finally reach out and touch the stars. 

“Fuck—fuck, keep going, yeah?” you stammered never ever wanting him to stop being the root of your every desire. 

What gave her the impression that I’d stop? This. . Us, it just feels so right. I will never be able to live in a reality where the image of her getting off on my thigh could ever cease—not after today. Not ever. 

“Just-just let me guide you, baby girl,” his voice was low and husk followed by a series of unpaced breaths. 

“Take me there, Jungkook,” you moaned. 

Oh, fuck—I’ll take you there baby. I’ll take you there. I’ll take you there. 

His fingers dug into you while his fingernails left behind marks of deep crescents traced on your skin. The guidance of his movements was near animalistic and the fabric of your panties was now sticking to your juices and there was nothing you craved more than the desirous urge to unravel under the trance of Jungkook’s ministrations. 

Back and forth; back and forth you moved reaching higher and higher as your fingertips brushed touch the points of the luminous star and before you knew your teeth sunk into his shoulders suppressing your moans and your hips no longer followed the rhythm he previously set and you were finally swimming in the night sky—so high; so satiated. 

“Oh,” you breathed, “that-that was amazing.” 

“You tired yet?” he asked. 

“Not at all.” 

Jungkook hugged your waist and flipped the two of you over; your bodies pressing together heatedly against the ocean of sheets, breathing heavily as your lips pressed together once again. His hands quickly dipped under the waistband of your panties reaching for your inner thigh, until you felt him press the pads of his fingers in between your folds smearing the combination of your juices. After  his torturous teasing he slipped two fingers pumping them in and out of you quickly. 

“Oh, baby,” he finally pulled away from your lips, allowing a string of whimpers to slip past your swollen lips, “you feel so fucking good.” 

“Jungkook, faster please,” you rocked your hips to match the beat of his fingers moving in and out of you. 

“Is that what you want?” he hummed, “tell me. You want to cum at the mercy of my fingers?” 

“Yes-yes. That’s what I want please.” 

Jungkook laid beside you on the bed with his face buried in the nape of your neck. His hand still worked diligently to get you off as he whispered soft praises against the shell of your ears. You were in your very own depiction of utopia—euphoric with stimulation of endorphins. 

“I’m close-close, Jungkook,” you dragged your nails down his back, likely leaving streaks of red trails behind as he quickened his pace. Meanwhile, you felt your body temperature skyrocket and the knot in the pit of your stomach tightened until it could not become any tighter and for the second time that night you felt how the storm passed and once again you floated throughout the night sky. 

While Jungkook strove to read your body like the ink inscripted into the pages of his favorite book; the absence of his wandering hands made you feel empty—as if you couldn’t really breathe. At all. 

“What happened, baby girl?” his lips traveled downwards on your body while his hands finally worked to unclasp your bra, (two orgasms later you couldn’t believe you still had all your undergarments on), and now your breasts became the forefront of his attack and leisurely he took each nipple in between his teeth smirking at your gasps and shudders as a result of your sensitivity, “are you the one who can’t stand the rule of not touching today?” 

“Ah—,” he lightly bit the side of your left breast before kissing it better, “the only thing I hate right now is that your dick isn’t in me right now.” 

He laughed; the booming sounds struck just like the raucous cries of thunder just outside your windows, “what makes you think I’m gonna fuck you tonight?” 

“I don’t know. Maybe the fact that I can feel how hard you are against my leg.” 

“What? This?” Jungkook sat-up on the bed working to remove his boxers. When he finally did he discarded them to the pool of clothes somewhere on your bedroom floor while his cock sat before you like it had been a few days prior.  Jungkook laid back down in front of you, placed a tender kiss on your forehead before he moved closer towards you, lifting your leg up and allowing it to rest on his hip. Once positioned he began rubbing the head of his cock against your clothed slit —especially focusing on the sensitive bud. 

He traced the lines of your lips over and over until you couldn’t take it any longer and tears began filling your eyes and you chanted hastely begging him to fuck you right into the mattress. 

“Please, Jungkook,” a needy whimpered rolled off your tongue, “please fuck me, please fuck me please.” 

Jungkook was now on top of you and he reached down, moving your soaked panties to the side before he lined himself at your entrance. You closed your eyes anticipating that moment when his cock would slip in and stretch you out so good you’d feel full beyond relief. And just as you imagined he slowly pushed himself past your entrance, your mouth fell agape at the sensation of his cock invading you inch by inch. 

The feeling was immeasurable and better than anything you’d ever felt before. 

“Will you be okay if I move?” he asked almost out of breath. 

You nodded frantically.

“Just let me know if you wanna stop at any point, okay?” he remained still. 

You nodded once again. 

Jungkook moved cautiously, setting a lento rhythm—almost as if he thought you’d break if he fucked into you too hard. His tattooed hand brushed your heated cheeks as he continued his agonizingly slow thrusts. The room was still silent for the most part except now in company to the pitter-patter of the pouring rain the two of you contributed your very own duet composed of his guttural groans mixed and your shaky pants. 

His lips left sweet kisses behind on both of your cheeks, then your nose, your chin and lastly your forehead. 

She looks so fucking beautiful like this; all sweaty and aroused just for me. Fucked out just for me. I’m so lucky. So lucky. 

“Jungkook?” you tucked your bottom lip under your top row of teeth. 

“Yes?” 

“Deeper, please,” you whined, “not faster but harder. I want to feel you deep in me.” 

Deeper? Fuck. She’s gonna be the death of me. I swear she is. I’ll fuck you just how you’d like baby girl. I’ll fuck you right. 

“Okay—okay,” he stammered. 

Jungkook stopped his movements and pulled out momentarily as he adjusted his position in between your legs. He grabbed both of them and wrapped them around his waist before pushing past your entrance once again, and yes, it felt just as jaw dropping as the first time. Jungkook’s pace remained lento except now whenever he was about to push back into you he made sure to lunge himself deeper causing the sounds of his skin slapping against yours to echo within the walls of your room. 

“Oh, Jungkoook,” you let out a drawn-out moan, chanting his name repeatedly, “right-right there, oh, Jungkooook. Right there. Please don’t stop.” 

He continued penetrating you just as you wanted until once again, for the third time that night, you were on the very edge of the planet. You could see the exact place where the sky met the earth. Trotting towards the phenom you felt the way your heartbeat quickened and finally as you approached you began clenching around him until you witnessed an explosion of stars behind your eyes; a feeling so blissful your knuckles turned white as you clutched the sheets underneath you in your grasp. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. .” he hissed pulling out quickly. 

“What’s wrong?” you gasp at the feeling of emptiness now substituted by a ravenous void. 

“I almost finished inside of you and we forgot to wear a condom,” his cock was held tightly in his hand.

You swiped your tongue on your lips, “would you like some help with that?” 

“That is not how today is supposed to go,” he mocked. 

“Fine,” you shrug, “but I was going to offer my body as an alternative.” Jungkook’s  pupils become dilated, your words obviously peeking his interest, “come on my face, Jungkook.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Positive.” 

Jungkook towered over you on the bed, kneeling right beside you on the bed—by now you were spent, too tired to do anything but lay there and admire the way his head hung back as he worked to find his release. The design of his tattoos followed suit beginning all the way from his shoulder blade, to his flexed and veiny bicep all the way down to the tight clasp of his finger around his shaft moving hastily from base to tip. 

“Look at you, baby girl. All eager for me to come on you,” Jungkook said through clenched teeth, “you’re so naughty for me. All for me.” 

“All for you, Jungkook,” you repeated, “I can’t wait to feel just how warm you’ll be on my face. Come on, baby. ” 

Your mantra of praises rolled off your tongue semi-automatically but you were needy to feel his seed on you so you continued using your words to aid him in the process of jerking off. He continued moving his hand up and down his length until the tip became painted white with drops of pre-come. 

“I’m almost—” he cried out; his guttural whimpers sent waves of glacial shivers interlacing with the ridges of your spine. 

“Yes, Jungkook. Be a good boy.” 

“I am a good boy,” his labored breathing came out in puffs, “I am. .” 

“Then, come on baby. I’m waiting.” 

Jungkook was immersed in what you knew was likely the build-up of his approaching release. His chest inflated and deflated rapidly, while the muscles in his stomach tightened accentuating his already sculpted physique while his cheeks turned a bright scarlet. 

“I’m coming!” He cried out. 

The spurts of his white semen painted your face as he worked himself to the very last drop. Even in his moment of release Jungkook was careful enough to aim towards your mouth and chin and you licked everything within reach of your tongue. 

“Let me get a wet rag and I’ll clean you up okay?” Jungkook stood from the bed and placed a kiss on your forehead before walking towards your bedroom door and opening it up. 

A few seconds went by and suddenly you heard a loud shriek and a plethora of muffled words which sounded a lot like your best friend, Hoseok. Not a lot of time went by before you saw Jungkook enter the room frantically before slamming the door shut and leaning against the wooden surface. 

“Hoseok’s home?” you laughed. 

“And Jimin.” 

“And they saw?” 

“Mhm.” 

“Please remind me to never leave this room naked again.”

“Yes! Please remind him!” Hoseok yelled from just outside the door. 

A bursting titter erupted between the two of you and Jungkook climbed back into bed with you before he helped you wipe off the mess he’d made on your body, then laid down beside you. 

“Can I ask you something?” You began snuggling deeper into his embrace. 

“Yes?.” 

“Will you stay here tonight?” You asked barely above a whisper—barely audible. 

Jungkook rested his chin on the crook of your neck, “of course, I’ll stay with you tonight.” 

There was no place you’d rather be than embraced in the solace of Jungkook’s warmth. 

Tonight, tomorrow, and forever after that. 

I’ll always stay with you.

-

-

-

an: you know what im about to say right? ignore the smut scene ~if you must~ it literally took me like two weeks to write because my brain wasn’t working >.<

i literally started working on this like a week before seven released…. *gulps*

[marloree]

TXT and their ways to celebrate your birthday

Pairing: Best Friend! TXT members (separately) × Reader

Genre: fluff, slight crack (?), headcanons

Hueningkai

I feel like he would be the type to prepare something warm and cozy for you. Be it a picnic in the nearby park or spending the day at his place where he prepares every single thing for you so you don't have to worry on your special day and just relax.

Gifts: plushies, little cute surprise gifts, things that reminded him of you, simply things you were ever caught mentioning you liked.

Beomgyu

I feel like he's the type to bring you to his house or come to yours and just play you songs until you get tired or your neighbours get tired of the noise you two make.

Definitely would help you with buying the food and with the overall preparations.

Gifts: he definitely would never gift you his portrait as a joke

Anything you like, really.

Or any funny silly thing he can come up with as a gift for you.

Soobin

He definitely would start wishing you right at 12 am by texting. Or, if he for sure knows that you aren't asleep, he'd lowkey come to your house at midnight just to be the first one to wish and gift you.

I feel like you could celebrate your birthday with him at a small cozy café or a restaurant nearby, without having to worry about cleaning all the mess if you were to celebrate at your place.

Gifts: if we're talking of him as a kpop idol, then he'd totally gift you every version of their albums; if we're talking non-idol! au, then - flowers + something you like.

Hear me out, he would totally give you a bigger bouquet of flowers than any boyfriend ever would.

Taehyun

He's definitely the one to be in for surprises.

If he starts acting all mysterious a good week before it's your birthday, don't even get surprised. The guy definitely comes up with something new and outstanding every year. He almost acts like it's his birthday instead of yours. Seriously, he plans out every single detail.

Be prepared to walk somewhere for half of your special day.

A new restaurant on the other end of the city, a nice place by the beach he recently discovered, or just the right place from where the whole city is seen - get your feet ready.

Gifts: the guy seriously seems to read your mind, or, rather, he's so observant to the point where he seems to remember every single word you've ever said. He'll definitely gift you that very thing you've mentioned only once a few months ago.

Yeonjun

He's up for everything and anything, really.

Do you want to throw a massive birthday party or enjoy the day with him only? Do you want to do something outstanding or just relax and have fun? Do you want to celebrate at a restaurant or go for something extra? He's always in.

Gifts: I think he'd be the type to directly ask you what exactly you want for your birthday. Don't hesitate to ask, though, he'll literally buy you whatever you want without looking at the prize tag twice. It's your special day, after all.

[delululand]

hi could u pls do txts turn ons + offs in a partner ?? tysm <33

hiii and sorry for long answer, it’s here~ hope you enjoy it~

txt turn ons + offs

I wasn't sure how you wanted this to be, so it has some mentions of NSFW content, but not a lot

soobin

turn ons: i talked about this before, but I think he's really into the cute type and we all know how he likes anime (does he watch hentai? idk but guess yes) and this got me thinking about whiney girls. it's a little hard to explain it completely, but his love for anime (and a shit that's in hentai)+his love for cute types+some aegyo type in korea, which isn't considered weird like it is for people living in europe and america, it all comes together such vibrations… so i guess groaning, moaning, whining it’s really his turn ons (but not too louder? hahaha I just immediately remember how he always “shhhh🤫” beomgyu when he starts being noisy)

and also being call some pet names? he’ll really like it

turn offs: okay i really think one of the biggest turn offs for him is degradation and any form of rudeness. he mentioned so much time that he prefer cute vibe and I really think that this extends to how he is in bed. I see him as a soft guy and if someone (especially his partner) were rude to him, even if during sex, it would most likely surprise and upset

and also just dishonesty, deceit and some shit like that

yeonjun

turn ons: I want to write so many things but I remember one of his live where he said something like "the way you perceive me seems a little distorted. off screen, my and soobin's personalities exchange". he didn't specify what exactly he was talking about or what part of his personality it was about, but it pops into my head every time I think of him. maybe it's a bit of a distorted perception, but can I really see him in something like a partially toxic relationship? I'm not talking about abuse or anything like that and I don't mean this in a bad way, but I think he would be interested in a relationship with some game?

it's like that girl who looks like an arrogant bitch (but she's actually nice) and she gives him mixed signals, secret dates and everything seems obvious, but no one says anything out loud and all that

it’s like 밀당 (밀고 당기기) this is a very popular thing in korea and literally means “push and pull”, first a person devotes a lot of time to the person he likes and flirts, and then pretends that he is not particularly interested in order to attract attention to himself

p.s. for my personal opinion it’s a strange shit, but a lot of people really into it

turn offs: this may sound a little contradictory, but actual arrogance and bad treatment of people? it's one thing to have arrogant bitch vibes, but to be a kind person, but to actually be an arrogant bitch is something else entirely

controlling and obsessive behavior (in a bad way) like I really see that if his partner was jealous of him, he would be flattered and he would take this situation into flirtation, but if his partner tried to control him 24/7, constantly wrote and called with questions about where and with whom he is, this would greatly alienate him

beomgyu

turn ons: ohhh that guy… firstly it’s catching his vibe? he has a specific sense of humor and it would be important to be on the same wave with him in general, but he also makes “suggestive jokes” most often and he’s the biggest dirty minder of all members. so one of his turn ons is someone who could not only take his jokes well, but also be able to answer him in the same manner and actually i think this boy reaaaally into dirty talks

turn offs: first of all I think it has two sides: 1. not taking his jokes and being sarcastic in a bad way (like not making jokes pretending that he is annoying because he would like that, but on the contrary answering rudely or something like that) and 2. not taking him seriously. yes, he is really funny and jokes a lot, but he also has feelings and would like to be able to talk about it seriously, discuss different topics with his partner and know that he will be understood and accepted

taehyun

turn ons: first, he’s really a smart guy and i think intelligent conversation and debate it’s one of his turn ons. but also an even bigger turn on is when he explains something to you? something like you ask him how this or that thing works and he tells you the story of how and why it works the way it does and the moment you nod at him with eyes full of interest his dick literally twitches in his pants.

secondly, he said he's not the type to take initiative (especially in showing affection) because of fear, so if someone had the courage to be more proactive it would touch his heart. like you know for example you're still at the just friends stage and you link arm in arm when you're crossing the road, lightly stroke his back when you hug him or put your hand and lean on his lap when you're sitting next to him and laugh. these actions are simple and innocent enough, but would literally drive him crazy

turn offs: total pessimism and whining all the time. everyone has problems at some point and it's fine if a person wants to get support and share it with someone, but I'm talking about people who literally whine 24/7 about everything and don't want to solve problems. does he really seem a little cruel about it? like he'd have no problem supporting you if something happened and helping you as long as it took, but he wouldn't coddle someone who's infantile and can't solve the slightest problem on his own

huening kai

turn ons: watching and discussing anime with him, don’t ask me why, i just feel so hahaha

paying attention to the smaller things that demonstrate true thoughtfulness and kindness and compassion towards others. he is sooo cute, kind and caring person and he'd really appreciate it if his partner showed the right attitude towards other people.

and also being able to show affection openly, giving him words of encouragement, praise and all of that

turn offs: ignorance and intolerance, too self-centeredness, i wrote about it above and I think it just goes against his values in life and what he might like

and also being closed off and emotionally unavailable like. he has a hard showing his feelings and if his partner is even more closed off, they just won't connect?

p.s. i would also be very interested to hear your opinion on this topic, maybe you have something to add?

[huckleberrykai]

txt ~ crush crush crush

pairing: txt x gn!reader (separate) scenario: how the members behave when they have a crush on you! warnings: none! but this IS the first thing im posting on here so pls don't judge too harshly,, starting out with some headcannons since my writing is rusty 🥹💗 click here for my masterlist!

Soobin:

SOFT SOFT SOFT

soft boy number 1

he treats you so nicely anyways, but when he realises his feelings for you,,, sheesh

ups the sweetness by 800%

likes to do things for you

cant reach the jam on the top shelf? boom soobin.

lost your favourite pen? boom soobin picked it up after you dropped it.

looks at you like you hung every star in the sky

"you look beautiful today Y/N... actually nevermind you do every day"

such a simp can't even hide it

will share his food with you and no one else

"OH SO THEY GET A FRY WHEN I GOT A PUNCH-"

"shut up beomgyu."

so scared to confess, perfectly content being your best friend forever apart from when he goes home and cries cause he wanted to kiss you

its okay sooby it'll happen 😌

Yeonjun:

touchy touchy boy

not shy with his feelings

deffo just wants to be close to you all the time

flirty little shit !

uses lame pickup lines from google

"how's your fever?"

"?? what fever? i'm fine?"

"oh sorry, you just look hot to me ;)"

you call him corny but its kinda cute

although he's confident and flirty he's still SO nervous to actually confess

definitely gives himself away before actually asking you out he's so obvious bro-

flirt back and he'll be so happy

better yet use a dumb pickup line on him and he's putty in your hands

Beomgyu:

friend zones you so hard out of fear you won't like him back

just a couple of besties 🤩

he wants to cry

he knows he has a crush, fully tries to ignore it

thinks he's smooth ... but everyone already knows

including you

talks about you to everyone, especially his gaming buddies

"Y/N's so cool they're coming over to watch a movie with me later"

"GYU WE'RE ABOUT TO DIE HERE ???? NOT THE TIME !"

bullies you (affectionately)

you could be the same hight as him and he'll still be like "haha shortie"

when he accepts it he's a lot more chill

maybe too chill

"hey why'd you not lend kai your hoodie? you let me wear the same one last week?"

"oh because im in love with you"

"oh. sweet."

deffo the type to accidentally blurt and not even notice until you ask him to be your bf like 5 mins later

Taehyun:

kinda shy tbh

he doesn't like to express his feelings in words, prefers to do things to show you he cares

definitely scared when he realises he likes u

boy had little to no interest in other people before u came along (not including the members of course :3)

buys you food if you say you haven't eaten

checks up on you a lot

"did you eat? you haven't been working too much have you?"

even if it means sneaking out of practice to text or call you

literally thinks you're better than everyone

"hey tyun, isn't that girl over there pretty? i love her haircut"

"hmph.. it would look better on you"

whipped but pretends he's not

he so is

Hueningkai:

soft boy 2

SO BLUSHY !!!

he's so flustered around you

yeonjun takes the piss out of him for it

gives you little gifts and trinkets to hint that he likes you

sometimes very random

"here Y/N, you mentioned you needed this the other day :)"

"kai why did you just give me dish soap-"

obvs gives you fun things too (PLUSHIES !)

strikes me as a very gift giving guy

"hey Y/N did you know penguins romance each other with pretty rocks they find?"

"no i didn't but that's cute"

"yeah.. so anyway i found this cool rock outside do you want it?"

will explode if u flirt with him

call him a pretty boy. do it. i dare u.

[izuom]

favorite kpop group(s) tag game!

tagged by : @writingmochi thank you for the tag lissie!! (and ofc for always having me included in these!)

sorry i cuss a lot

who is your favourite kpop group?

oh boy.. i hope i’m able to answer this without having to list down more than 10+ groups all at once (i’m being serious) but if having favs that you’re constantly updated to then : bts, txt, le sserafim, enhypen, nct dream, riize & aespa!

which member sparked your interest first?

i’m having the toughest time now but here we go

bts : JUNGKOOK! who else other than our used one of the main rappers (WE LOST TO RAPPER JUNGKOOK BEFORE 2015 AND IM STILL BITTER but out of honesty that sadnesses washed away the moment when he decided to birth outro : love is not over and let’s just say i’ve never been fine since then) bro has been an all-rounder since day one and to that he was the one that made me to discover bts (touché)

txt : yeonjun (duh) i was once a bts popper so the moment we were getting a new boy group under bh i just knew i had to check them out. i mean yeonjun is literally every moa’s first love so it’s almost understandable for him to be the first member for you to be interested to LOL

le sserafim : huh to the yunjin (are we serious? that woman slayed on her first day job) it’s mesmerising to see that source music *blood coughing* decided to give us a closure…………… but miss it girl yunjin, duh she’s a starstruck i know it’s getting out of the phrase but i’ll always be grateful that she becomes an idol. the world (read kpop) wouldn’t be the same without her existence. 

enhypen : SUNGHOON!!!!! ON AN ICE RINK!!!! SKATING!!!!! LIKE ???? IVE NEVER SEEN AN IDOL WHO WERE AN ICE SKATER BEFORE LIKE ??? THATS THE MOST PUREST BEAUTIFUL FORM SOMEONE COULDVE BE???

nct dream : mark! bc he was one of the members that were introduced first as part of the nct u sub-unit. i first watched him performing the 7th sense debut performance on music bank and was surprised to see him in the other remaining sub-unit under sm (but then i figured it out that nct IS a group that consists few sub-unit) (i was confused, still am)

riize : wonbin. any attractive man with long hair never not makes me HOOKED on a first sight. he’s majestic. AS HELL. he plays the guitar very well too?? 

aespa : karina!! also i think this was everyone’s normal occurrences of having karina as the first member that sparked your interest in aespa bc same. i only know her first in aespa like she’s mentioned in every fic or edit or on stan twt like… she’s everywhere it’s crazy. (the power she holds)

who was your first bias?

INTERESTING

bts : hoseok. man do we need to replay my first love? HE WAS THE MAN OF MY LIFE.

txt : soobin,, ARE WE SURPRISE AGAIN 

le sserafim : chaewon! i think the answer is there.

enhypen : sunghoon (forever will) 

nct dream : jisung. bro when i say that i used to have a serious crush on him? 2018 zu was a jisung’s whipped era.

riize : sungchan! 90s love was a life experience. (man decided to just make a cameo and slay as fuck) i know we are suppose to talk about sungchan in riize but he’s my first bias in riize ONLY because i knew him first alongside with shotaro (sungtaro slay) 

aespa : KIM MINJEONG. YOU CANNOT TALK TO ME ON HER. SHE WAS MY FIRST LOVE??? 

who is your current bias?

basically just the same except for bts & nct dream :D

bts : yoongi (i am a joke)

txt : soobin (salute for being this loyal)

le sserafim : chaewon

enhypen : sunghoon

nct dream : renjun (....... surprise surprise)

riize : sungchan (eventho i highly think this won’t last long….fuck)

aespa : ningning

what makes them your current bias?

bts : I KNOW CRAZY. i’ve been there for hobi since 2014 esp around those times when no one was there to appreciate him truly as one of the members (DARK TIMES FOR ME, we do not talk about that) but then 2017 yoongi came in. it’s just something about yoongi himself that soothes my soul in peace. the way he thought of things in his own perspective without disrespecting anybody and the way he’s just a full walking comfort a person could be for anyone, for me particularly. his godly, incredible amount of times he’d shown off his talent in rap, producing and things he’d done. i can talk about yoongi that people wouldn't be able to understand bc he’s so ?? what a person is supposed to be. is there anything to prove why i decided to change a bias? 

txt : when soobin was introduced as the second member of txt (gurl) when i told you that soobin introduction film was… a first love at sight moment, it was true. soobin has been the love of my fucking life since then. actually no there’s so many things that i love about soobin. so many things, it’s unexplainable. i can confidently say that his voice caught me off-guard on a first listen. i know it’s dramatic as hell (ANYTHING I SAY ABOUT MY BIASES ARE SO QUESTIONABLE BUT I AM BEING SERIOUS) he has the rarest vocal on his falsetto? he’s doing it effortlessly too? if that’s not enough to actually prove my point of him being my bias then idk what is. man is majestic as hell too. (BONUS POINT!)

le sserafim : AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH god chaewon… honestly, i wasn’t a wiz*one bc produce 48 was shitty as hell. (I WATCHED EVERY MNET SURVIVAL SHOW EXCEPT FOR THIS) neither do i like the final debut lineup for iz*one. i just couldn’t pinpoint what was missing but that’s not the point of that rn. well. for me, i think the majority of people would have agreed with me about this but chaewon is better off with le sserafim. (AUDIENCE GASP) i COULD NEVER say that she caught my attention even the tiniest bit when she was in iz*one, but she did ON A FIRST SIGHT OF HER DEBUT IN LE SSERAFIM. the way that she kept on improving and i didn’t even know that she can dance so well???? (this woman is literally everyone’s type and it’s FUCKING understandable) i watched their documentary too and i love her even much more than i should’ve? i think having chaewon as my bias, it’s emotional. i am emotionally attached to her and i don’t want to seek therapy. 

enhypen : *internally crying, hysterically screaming* are we ready to hear the part of me losing almost entirely of my sanity? i was away from home for the first time for my college, and never really bothered to get updated with my kpop life. those days were.. hectic (as everyone did) but long short story i was on tiktok, at my room, at home since for so long, AFTER my hectic first sem and i just so happened to stumble upon a sunghoon edit on an ice rink, skating WITH THE TIMOTHEE TREND SONG (2020 WAS 4 YEARS AGO TOO?? GOD) AND IM LIKE ??? WHO IS THIS? I NEED TO KNOW WHO IS HE. yk i haven’t watched iland yet at that time (and probably shouldn’t so that i wouldn’t have to endure the trauma that show gave me), and only decided to watch it bc of him. I JUST LOVE LOVE skater park sunghoon a lot more than myself (that should be considered as normal btw) and i never regretted checking out on iland bc if i don’t i wouldn’t have known just how unique his talent is? you can ACTUALLY tell he has the most unique way of dancing, as if he’s dancing with every bit of his skating method and combining it to his dancing style and it’s just ?? beautiful… god park sunghoon i love him a lot.

nct dream : crying as i type this, i love renjun a lot. man is so demonically pure. i haven’t been on nct shit for SO LONG until last year (only applicable for nct dream) and i am attached as shit as they wanted me to be. i think re-stanning nct dream (i will say this forever if i’ve to prove how much they mean to me) was the peak of the third quarter of my life last year. but as for renjun, he’s just so easy to love? for me, his own persona to things as a person always never makes me so deeply attached. (like the fucking loser i am) renjun have a lot of things you can say a lot of things to, like his vocals? (ik you can confidently say that sm has the most vocals out of that shitty company) but i LOVE to listen to his voice. he’s singing with his emotions and my soul thaws in silence every time. HES ALSO SO ROMANTIC LIKE??? MAN CASUALLY JUST ASKED HIS TEAMMATES TO HAVE A MATCHING FRIENDSHIP RINGS LIKE? 

riize : as for sungchan, i think i'm still learning about him. I know i’ve seen him a few times (more than 10 times on screen as for the appearance of the inkigayo and being part of nct) but i still have a lot of things to learn before i can list things down. (gurl you’re in love with another member)

aespa : i love everything about ning yizhuo. i honestly have no idea how i changed my bias but i could never say no to people who can sing well. her vocals?? i can listen to her singing on a daily basis. shes a stunner, a mother=my type. well, her whole existence stands out the most when i first discovered aespa. i just love ningning, she’s so loveable, i love her except for she idolized that one problematic rat. 

who is your bias wrecker

bts : i love them all equally. (jungkook)

txt : taehyun. stfu 

le sserafim : kazuha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love my woman a ballerina 

enhypen : jungwon. 

nct dream : zhong chenle (hes so attractive???????????)

riize : eunseok 

aespa : minjeong……………………

which member are you currently obsessing that aren’t your bias/bias wrecker

bts : i’ll skip them (they be on military, i’ve no one to be obsessed to recently)

txt : beomgyu. (DAEGU MEN STAY AWAY FROM ME)

le sserafim : YUNJIN. she needs to stop 

enhypen : heeseung. i think i’ve problems with the 01 liner. 

nct dream : none i guess. (i'm still obsess with renjun)

riize : ….. sohee. i think out of the groups, sohee has the most valid reasons and i'm fully to blame for this. i watched the lee hyori’s red carpet to their sampled track of love 119 (THEIR BEST SONG YET WHAT THE FUCK) which is none other than the infamous emergency room ost AND WHEN I TELL YOU IVE BEEN OBSESSED SINCE. and that obsession didn’t stop there, i decided to check more to his vocals compilation and i stumbled upon his predebut covers… WORSE: his sofa cover has been playing on my mind all day since i first heard of it, it’s unhealthy. i’m gonna k word myself 

aespa : none too. 

when did you first discover the group?

bts : 2014. boy in luv was a superior era. 

txt : 2019…. that guessing the morse code at the end of introduction films of every member's era? good old days

le sserafim : on their debut

enhypen : end month of september 2020! (funfact : enhypen was formed on my birthday) 

nct dream : on their debut (them hoverboard era)

riize : on their debut days

aespa : early year 2022 (embarassing as fuck)

have you ever been to one of their concerts?

bts : gurl, no. they did a tour for the red bullet on june 2015? THAT ONE TIME ONLY. what did you expect from me? to go? i was 13. 

txt : they don’t even know my country exists? so no. 

le sserafim : no. (hybe better put malaysia when they do tour one day or else im burning down the whole building as it should’ve)

enhypen : no. (they skipped us.) 

nct dream : they did a tour last year in may…… but miss girl decided to only stan them back in june and was obsessed and mentally ill for not attending. (ONLY BC I AM NOT A FAN) i was late to the party, im sorry and now they be skipping us. 

riize : no. 

aespa : ???????? NO

what are some of your favourite songs by this group? 

i’ll list 10 songs!

bts : butterfly / dimple / coffee / love is not over (full length version) / epilogue : young forever / pied piper / outro : do you think it makes sense? / the truth untold ft steve aoki / spring day / hold me tight 

txt : 20cm / dear sputnik / 0X1=lovesong (i know i love you) ft seori / maze in the mirror / ghosting / skipping stones / fairy of shampoo / blue orangeade / farewell, neverland / eternally 

le sserafim : impurities / easy / perfect night / no celestial / antifragile / smart / blue flame / swan song / good parts (when the quality is bad but i am) / sour grapes

enhypen : just a little bit / criminal love / mixed up / chaconne / not for sale / blockbuster ft yeonjun of tomorrow x together / shout out / blind / given-taken / bills

nct dream : dive into you / teddy bear / 7 days / boom / my youth / better than gold / dunk shot / arcade / poison / love again

riize : …. i’ll list from most to least fav (I LOVE ALL OF THEIR SONGS) love 119 / talk saxy / get a guitar / memories  

aespa : lucid dream / dreams come true / drama / thirsty / next level / life’s too short / don’t blink / i’m unhappy / illusion / better things 

tagging : @my313 (no pressure bestie!) / anyone who want

[songmingisthighs]

Hellooo! I'm a new atiny and I was wondering if you could help me get to know the boys a bit, if you could describe them in a few words, what you think about them, who's ypur favorite and why. I'm also curious who are the trouble makers and who are the mom and dad of the group who keep them in check.

oooo hellaurrrrr welcome to the mess <3

in a nutshell, ateez is... pretty... self explanatory ??

you only need to know that within ateez is a group of fuckboi wannabe dorks called 99z (구구즈/gu-gu-jeu) which literally translates to the 99 liners and a duo called matz (맏즈) which consist of the two oldest members (both 98 liners) and yeah they left the youngest who's the only 00 liner but frankly ion think he gives a fuck because he's always either with mom and dad (matz) or pulling some shit with 99z.

- matz

seonghwa > the oldest is the mom. he's a boomer trying to become a genz, you'll see him constantly wanting to join in on weird ass 99z antics or with wooyoung circling around him like a chicken doped up in coccaine. soft cute babie off stage like literally lactates whenever he sees kids but on stage looks like he's possessed. I dare you to watch his guerrilla fancam.

hongjoong > captain (not leader), 2nd oldest and the "dad". bc fr he's a workaholic, 9 times out of 10 you'll find him camping in his studio. Dedicated and talented as fuck, produce every ateez songs despite being worse than tone deaf when he first got into kq. the embodiment of the word "tired. and he's possessive as fuck so don't even mention other singer or celebrities near him. he'll pop a vein or smth. stage possession pt. 2

- 99z

yunho > tallest boy. golden retriever who thinks he's a daschund or smth idk. easily excited, so fucking cute, handsome, can kill you with love and kindness. literally don't join his private message on universe, you'll get delulu. soft and lovable yet people wanna fuck with him because they're petty jealous bitches haha pendejo ANYWHAM the way he moves on stage is just... holy fucking shit ???? mesmerising. watch ateez's guerrilla on killpo on 1thek (yt) and you'll get what i mean

yeosang > looks like he can murder you simply by flicking the air near your forehead because HAVE YOU SEEN HIS ARMS ??? kq srsly need to shut down the gym. if you see him during predebut/early debut era and compare to his present look, you'd think he was swapped or smth bc where the fuck is the innocent naive nerd that woo said won't survive this world without him ???

san > DON'T GET TOO CLOSE, YOUR EYES WILL BURN. off stage he's san :D but on stage he's san >;). cheeky lil shit who used to sing in a church choir despite being not religious because he has the voice of an angel. and the body and moves of satan. istg don't watch his cyberpunk fancam in public, you're gonna wanna take a shower after that. master of performance like fr possessed on stage pt. 3

mingi > THE OTHER TALL BOY and the love of my life. looks like he could stomp you and will stomp you. by accident. tol boi makes many many clumsy steps. sexy on stage but off stage makes you wanna swaddle him and feed him cookies. obsessed with abura soba and he's your go-to guy for comfort in terms of like feeling better about yourself or when you feel like a loser. recommends songs A LOT on his pm

wooyoung > sly little bastard. he looks mischievous. AND HE IS MISCHIEVOUS. L O U D A S F U C K, i suggest you don't watch his videos in public because i deadass watched ateez whilst in the bus and Wooyoung's voice penetrate through my earphones. at 0% volume you can still hear him. but he's iconic, memorable, gay as fuck (in the best way) but ion wanna assume his sexuality because he calls his fans his wife. men women nonbinary trigender, EVERYONE'S woo's wife (영부인/young-bu-in). calls his dude friends honey (jagiya) like yeonjun (txt), changbin (skz) and many more methinks. man's a social butterfly like i believe he can befriend putin or smth

- babie <3

jongho > BEAR <3 literally the stylists are doing him justice this comeback bc he looks SO FUCKING GOOD istg he's turning my brain into mush. idk what's above angel voice because that's the fuck he has. so fucking talented and so damn fucking done with his hyungs's antics. but everyone loves him <3 <3 he's still everyone's baby <3 <3 but fr don't mess with him because he splits apples in half without having to try so i do believe he has the power to break spines, limbs, and mental

this is all i can think of so far pls let me know if you have more things you wanna know <3

[faceglitchsworld]

TxT and Fluffy Hair: a wonderful relationship~ Part 5: The Coolest Fox 🦊

Author's note: this is the last time I'll repeat everything don't worry. This is just my personal opinion about haircuts, don't expect any objective facts. The analysis are inspired by Michaela Diana's works on Instagram. If I mentioned other idols I did it only as examples not for comparison. The pic used are taken from TxT's official accounts, not fantaken.

This series is dedicated to @onlyoneofyouu

Hello everyone, how have you been?

Today the series dedicated to TxT and their wonderful relationship with curly hair aka The Floof, will come to an end. Sadly :(

We have only one member left so I will not make a super big presentation, I think you already know who will be the subject of our post.

My dear readers, the members I'm referring to is...

* drums roll *

YEONJUN!

Look it's the last post, let me have some fun, ok?

Oh Yeonjun, our beloved fox, dancer, rapper and full time model. This boy is literally perfect in every aspect but can he have The Floof too?

Well, let's say that... it's complicated and you'll understand why by looking at his facial features soooo, LET'S GO!

Ladies, gentlemen and non-binary pals calm down and don't go crazy while watching these selfies please. I know he's beautiful but have some demeanour 😅🤣

Starting from the face shape and his jawline, Yeonjun seems to have a sort of round/mini heart face shape. The slightly pointy chin might make you think that he has a sharp jawline but he actually it's very blunt and smooth.

So yeah, he already has two good features for The Floof. But if we go checking the eyes and the presence of full cheeks...uhmmm, the situation becomes a little complicated now.

His eyes seems downturned and little, which means that the bangs can be too much longer. You get it, I don't like long bangs, especially if they cover the eyes. In Yeonjun's case, if you give him long bangs I might completely lost my mind. But we can work with it somehow.

In my opinion he has some full cheeks when he eats especially but also when he's relaxed, he just needs some make up which let's them shine.

Also, maybe it's just me, but his ears are a little prominent. I don't know you but he's the first TxT member who catches my eyes when he wears earrings. Keep this feature in mind too, it will be useful later.

So, as you can see, Yeonjun has some features which can work perfectly for The Floof but others make this haircut a little difficult to menage for him. But don't worry Yeonjun, I'll find a solution for you.

Let's find the haircut first. Since his eyes are downturned, if we want to let them shine we need to let his forehead uncovered. It's pretty normal for him, since the majority of his haircuts consist of his uncovered forehead.

In my opinion he can't have a short haircut with the curls all over his forehead, even if the bangs have a good length. The reason? His ears.

Did you keep them in mind? Good. His ears are one of his most recognisable features. If he had short curly hair, his ears might end up being covered by the curls all over his head. That's why he mostly has straight hair if you think about it.

So, in my opinion, I think that a floofy mullet might work perfectly for him. He can show his forehead (and so his eyes) and his ears might not be to much covered by the curls.

And the hair colour?

Look, I'm being honest with you, I think that his hair started to suffer a lot from the hair dying recently. I don't know you but I noticed that, when he has his hair coloured, he lets the roots growing so, since I care a lot about his hair's condition, I think he should stick to his natural colour/dark colours such as black.

BUT, if a miracle will happen and his hair condition will get better then, in my personal, humble opinion he should come back to pink, his most ✨ I C O N I C✨ colour

This is how he might look like, but the mullet can be even a little longer for me

And that's it, this is how Yeonjun might look like with The Floof. As you've noticed he needs a very specific haircut to shine but if you have his features in mind and enough imagination you can always find a solution to it.

And we have officially come into the end of this series. I really hope you had fun while reading all of this and you started to appreciate The Floof a little more.

See you on the next post 👋

[ox1-lovesick]

ᥫ᭡ 투바투 ── reaction to you baking them cookies!

⌕ . . . pairing. txt x gn!reader genre. fluff ☁️ warnings. mentions of food, swearing (?) wc. 100-200 each

⌕ . . . synopsis. you bake tubatu cookies 🍪

⌕ . . . a/n: my first post on this smelly app i hope it doesn't eat ass 😻 also craving cookies really badly rn

── YEONJUN

we all know yeonjun is a BIG foodie,, he'd fall inlove all over again if you baked and cooked for him 💔

thinks it's so romantic.

you? took time out of your busy day? to buy ingredients? and bake cookies? for HIM??? my lordy lord he's so inlove with you

really doesn't matter how much you bake he'll finish them in an hour 💀 even if they don't taste that great, that doesn't matter. they were made by you, with your hands, your love and affection, he will absolutely eat every last crumb.

bonus points if you decorated them cutely, he'll take 15000 pictures from every angle and send them to everyone he knows. his mom, his dad, the members, his childhood friends, his choreographer, his manager, hitman bang, his teacher from the third grade, EVERYONE will know that you baked cookies for him and how delicious they are

── SOOBIN

he's a bit worried at first

traumatized from his own baking experiences (aswell as the members) he probably expects them to taste like charcoal

very hesitant to take a bite because he's worried he'll get salmonella but it surprisingly doesn't taste as bad as he thought it would???

what witchcraft if this???

suspiciously takes another bite and suddenly the entire batch has been polished

your cookies are his new guilty pleasure 😈

WILL NEVER EVER SHARE THEM WITH THE MEMBERS (even if you tell him to) they're his and his only 💔

will hide them up his ass if he has too, they must never know how good your baking is

── BEOMGYU

suspicious #2

beom is a picky eater.

he loves you, don't get me wrong but you'll have to try extra hard if you want him to even nibble on one of your cookies 💀

would probably pick a crumb off the bottom of the plate and say they're delicious 💀

eventually he does give in because as mentioned before, he's whipped ^_^

takes the smallest nibble tho

he literally can't taste anything cause of how little he ate but he'll call you y/n ramsay

you'll have to shovel one down his esophagus for him to taste it 💀

would probably pretend to throw up

but once he's done teasing you he'll compliment your baking ofc <3

as much as he doesn't want to admit it he's now hooked on your cookies

needs them like he needs air

"if i hypothetically asked you to bake your gross cookies again would you hypothetically bake them for me 👉👈"

── TAEHYUN

"🤨🤨🤨🤨"

he prides himself on the fact that he can cook a decent meal and the others can't, so if you were able to do any better than him it'd bruise his ego 💔

he's not gonna throw your tin of cookies on the floor and call them disgusting ofc he'd just feel a little bit threatened 🤨

would probably say shit like "tell your mom her cookies are delicious"

if you call him out on it he'll start getting whiny and defensive 💀

although he'll admit defeat eventually and ask you to bake them again

stingy #2 the members must never know.

will hide your tin in his underwear draw or something maniacal like that

although yeonjun will probably be doing laundry or something and find them 😭

and when yeonjun asks him about it he'll come up with the lamest excuse too please

"who put cookies in the sewing kit?" 😟

── HUENINGKAI

does a backflip the second they touch his lips

you know that Talk X Today episode where soobin baked tarts and kai tasted one and started doing roly polys on the couch?

that's him.

bro levels up when he takes a whiff of your baking

unlike the rest of his greedy members he'll encourage them to try your baking and give feedback (although if it's negative feedback he'll rub onions on their pillows (⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)

will ask to bake them with you next time and to teach him the recipe so he can bake them for you some time as well

he'll get flour up his nose and sneeze white for the next few weeks but he has good intentions !!

will brag about it to his family and friends

"you're just mad y/n doesn't bake YOU cookies leah 🤨"

© ox1-lovesick — all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, or repost my work without my explicit permission.

[boba-beom]

❦ who gets hurt (before / during / after the talking stage) | OT5

pairing(s): txt x s/o (gn!reader)

genre: angst | headcanon

warning(s): a little heart heavy, lowercase intended, mentions about broken relationships, unrequited feelings, tendency to fall out of love, rejection, playing with emotions, lowkey leading on

summary: each member is their own person working in their own way. some personalities clash, and some don’t. but not every talking stage ends in a healthy relationship.

disclaimer: just a reminder that this does not represent the idol irl in any way, it's just my thoughts for entertainment.

wc: 954

note: you just know I’m about to recommend Hurt by New Jeans. Le Sserafim’s Sour Grapes is a little similar too! it’s been a while since I wrote some angst so here it goess,, majority of these are what I thought of and I also discussed these ideas with my baby @yjusei thank you for adding on the bonus ideas for soobin <3

taglist: @wccycc @ericyjun @hotboyyeonjun @bluejin0812 @lizdevorak @luvsoobs @yeonyeonyeonjun @fairybin @laylasbunbunny @junniieesbby @kyrkitten @acaiasahi @fairyoftaehyun @hyuntaena @choiwrld @potaeto-writes-on-wp @itmehc @fairybinie @cha0thicpisces (fill in this form to be part of a taglist)

CHOI YEONJUN — does the hurting and gets hurt: he flirts a lot in general, but when he genuinely really likes you and tells you that, you refuse to believe him. you're thinking you're just some type of game to him along with the other people he talks to. he tries so hard to convince you but you just can’t trust him because he literally flirts and plays too much. you’re scared of being hurt by someone like him; someone who literally has everyone falling by his feet and has countless options, and yet he's also hurting that he doesn't know how else to convince you that he genuinely wants to be with you.

CHOI SOOBIN — would get hurt: he is so gentle and has so much love to give, but some people take advantage of that and only care about going to these fancy places and doing things they want because soobin's previously mentioned that he’d say yes to whatever his gf/ s/o would say. in the end when he realises that, he voices it out to tell them they should try staying in or saving money instead of blowing it away, and that s/o is fed up of him being a party pooper that they call off the relationship and finds another guy to spend money with. soobin isn't stingy, no, he's just becoming aware that the only time majority of his past s/o's would want to spend time with him is when money is involved. he'd like to have some nights when you stay in and binge watch his favourite anime or you two start an anime that neither of you have watched before, but he hasn't experienced that yet.

BONUS: an alternative is that soobin would be doing the hurting. soobin, as a leader, is so used to needing to maintain such a perfect image with restrictions to a lot of things, so when he enters a relationship it's his form of escapism. the relationship just wouldn't be stable. he has this side of him that no one really knows, he can't show them off even if he wanted to because he has his everyday duties and responsibilities. and when he eventually has a partner to show off this unknown side of him, he associates all fun stuff – that he hasn't been able to do – with that relationship; resulting on the relationship leaning more towards the 'fun' dynamic rather than an emotional thing. and due to the lack of emotional connection – mostly from soobin's side – there would be a possibility of the relationship falling into an on-and-off pattern. seeming he may be irritated once his fun is done or interrupted, he'd call off the relationship only for him to get back with you again in a matter of a couple of days, only for the cycle to repeat.

CHOI BEOMGYU — the one who does the hurting: though he’s got this playful and extremely loveable side of him that we are aware of, he isn’t interested in relationships at the moment, or for a long while; he just wants to focus on himself, his career and do things the traditional way. he's got this work ethic that he genuinely enjoy's what he does, and although he may find people attractive and start conversations with them, he just knows that it's only temporary and has this mindset that there's no point in pursuing something that isn't event there in the long run. there are chances he would talk to someone he's attracted to but it wouldn't go past the talking stage — he's set on the thought that it'll be temporary and will not hesitate to turn them down if they are wanting to be something more. he’s such a mommy’s boy that he puts his efforts towards and prioritises his own family before thinking about getting into a relationship. he wants to live the best life to the fullest without the thought of a relationship having to weigh him down / prevent him from doing things he wants to do.

KANG TAEHYUN — does the hurting and gets hurt: he believes that the chances of two people liking each other is extremely narrow, so he straight up tells you that he isn’t really into you. at most, and if you're that interesting to him, he'd ask if you two can still stay in contact and be just friends. but when he does find someone who he’s into, he plays hard to get with his walls up and guarded, and tells you the same thing as he always does, but eventually, you convince yourself that he doesn’t like you in that way at all. and when he sees someone else flirting with you he gets jealous and literally took it upon himself 😭 it's his fault you've fallen in the arms of another person when he literally had you in the palm of his hand but decided to let it go, he's too shameless to ask you to come back to him just so he could show you how much he liked you.

HUENINGKAI — would get hurt: again, he loves too easily. he’s literally so precious and I feel like people either don’t stay in a relationship for long / don’t reciprocate that feeling because they see him as too nice, because he’s genuinely a pure soul. some people would go for people like yeonjun with a more wild and out going personality. and he envies yeonjun for that wild side that he may not have, or beomgyu's loud and out-going side because he thinks it's easier to date people of those personalities. he’d get a little insecure about it, especially if someone in the past has left him for someone of that category and would be a little scared to love again 🥺

© boba-beom ; do not repost, copy, alter or translate in any way.

[lightaflme]

— ✦ txt on showterview with jessi

bulleted layout! + his outfit and hair is in the pic below!, bold in english! sorry this isnt proofread and this is pretty long the vid is like 30 mins.. also the layout is pretty inspired by @ateezjuliet !!!

so our lovely jiwoo was seated next to beomgyu!!

jessi was in for a long ride because we know what happens when woogyu are together 🤭 but she doesn’t know that 🤫

jw: hello, jessi :D! i am… jiwoo! but you can also call me elijah 😁

js: YOU ARE SO CUTE!!!

when jessi realized that kai and taehyun were born in 2002, jiwoo was CACKLING

then jessi mentioned that she thought jiwoo was the youngest because of how cute he was HAHA

jw: ahhh nono, i am actually one of the older ones, i’m the same age as soobin hyung

js: ah….. *txt starts laughing and beomgyu is like “our cutie jiwoo!!” and jiwoo almost bites him*

you could literally hear jiwoo’s laugh throughout the whole close up camera part😭

sb: i’m in charge of sexiness 😏

jw: *crying bc of laughter* yaa…. he’s very sexy

then it got to jiwoo

js: okay jiwoo!

jw: my charming point issss my whole face because i am handsome!

then the members are just like “yeaaaahhh” “WOOOO JIWOO SO HANDSOME”

js: you are right he is very handsome…

and then jiwoo giggles and is like “stop ittt ><“

and jessi is like “HE’S CUTE TOOOO”

when they started arguing about who’s the crybaby and jiwoo just stayed quiet because he knows very well he’s probably the biggest crybaby out of all of them 😭

during the txt quiz, he kept on being like “oo that’s a good one!” to each option to make jessi confused and she was like “hey. jiwoo-ah 😡😡” and they all started laughing and hi fiving jiwoo LMAO

instead of five options, there were six options bc… idk now there’s six of them 😭 but the option that jiwoo read was the korean title for blue hour/5시 53분의 하늘에서 발견한 너와 나 (you and i found the sky at 5:53)

js: wait… these are all song titles

th: i know, it’s hard to believe four of them are the real titles of the songs

sb: all of them sound fake 😅

jw: even i can’t name them sometimes 😭

then jessi asked them to sing a line from each song

jiwoo was tempted to lie because jessi said that they could lie about the lyrics but then he didn’t he was being nice

when she picked the wrong one, him and beomgyu start CELEBRATING and she yells at them LMAOO

js: honestly, the melody sucks they’re so annoying 😭 *in a joking manner*

txt: 😭😭😭😭😭😭

jw: we should make that an actual song!!

then question two about the fandom name!!

beomgyu and jiwoo were getting on her nerves 😭

jw and bg: hello mov! 🥰

jw and bg: hi luv 🥰

js: man, i hate you!!

and she gets it right WOOO

jessi is the best moa!

jiwoo laughed when yeonjun was like “did we?” when she was supposed to guess which gift they didn’t give to moas 😭

jw: 6. a song for moa! (which was moa diary)

js: ahhh it’s not that one, they’re very kind they would definetly do that 🥰

then she guessed the group shirts and they went “ohhhhh…. you’re right! 😁”

and then the tteokbokki 😭

js: did you buy it from *the brand she mentioned idk what it is 😭*??

jw: :O I LOVE THAT BRAND!!

js: REALLY??

js: no i don’t know what brand that is 😁

js: HEY 😡😡😡 DON’T LAUGH 😡😡😡

time for loser=lover promotion!!

featuring beomgyu and jiwoo being cute for jessi’s camera 🥰

we are all losers and lovers for txt!

during mv shooting, taehyun mentions that they haven’t done super intense acting and jiwoo laughs while thinking about it

jw: during my part, i had to throw things and kick stuff… the directors were like “jiwoo! scream while doing it! look mad!” and then i went… “ahh.. ☹️” but then my members were like “pretend it’s yeonjun hyung!” and i immedietly knew how to act like it 🥰

txt and jessi, except sulky yeonjun: HAHAHHA

jw: love you hyung! *yeonjun slaps his arm*

when jessi tried to pronounce dubadu wari wari 😭 DUBADU HUH⁉️

moa diary segment: jiwoo just cringing at every part and especially laughing at taehyun trying to be jessi LMAOO

jw: ahhh… so sexy…. yeah….

jessi gave jiwoo a “boyfriend” type

hk and sb: oohhh i’m excited for this!!

his message: ahhh, my LOVER ~~ have you heard our song? i’m a LOSER for you and only you, i love you moa 😍

js: AWWW SO CUTE 🥰🥰

txt: iskwjduwjeh so cringeeeee 😅

can you tell that jessi thinks jiwoo is super cute and is still convinced that he’s the maknae

js: txt are variety idols! they talk back, especially these three! *pointing at beomgyu, yeonjun and jiwoo*

sb: jiwoo usually isn’t like that but he’s with beomgyu sooo

instead of jessi, jiwoo is on the older team and takes jessi’s place and… 😭

jiwoo asks jessi for help and when jessi demonstrates for him, he gets super flustered LMAO

js: *demonstrating watermelon*

jw: IDKFJEIB please stop i got it 😅

and then soobin demonstrates.. and yeonjun feels like he shouldn’t get it right.. and now all three of them are shy and the younger ones and jessi are like “JUST GUESS IT” while yeonjun sadly guesses watermelon and gets it right 😔💔

but they did win in the end!!

js: jiwoo, please say something

jw: ahhh, thank you for watching, please listen to our albummm! i love you moa ❤️

overall jiwoo had lots of fun and would love to go on showterview as a full group again </333

and jessi’s txt bias is jiwoo 🥰🥰

[tyunni]

txt when they have a crush on you !

pairing: all members x gn!reader.

warnings: none other than maybe some slip ups, english isn't my first language.

genre: fluff, comedy, angst if u squint.

a/n: YAYY my first post on the new blog!! hope you enjoy :D

yeonjun (연준)

isn't very subtle about it,

the second you step into the room he's thinking about which pick-up line to use today <3

in reality, he's actually extremely nervous around you but tries to cover it up by being a flirt.

thinks about you all the time and sometimes has a hard time focusing on important work because of you,

you live in his mind rent-free, let's be honest here.

gets jealous easily, so if he sees you hanging out with another person, being a lil' too touchy and friendly for his liking,

he's going to come up to you right then and there & just go "damn y/n, thought we had something special!?!??!?" faking a pout and clutching his heart dramatically, waiting to hear your angelic laugh pierce through his ears so he can feel the relief of knowing that you're still oblivious to his feelings.

he isn't joking though, his ego is a tiny bit bruised, but he knows he's overreacting and has no right to feel that way because you aren't even dating (yet ;D)

shows his skills off to you a lot, whether it's dancing, rapping or vocals.

sends you a bunch of selcas, saying that he wants you to help him choose which one he should post for moas to see, but in all honesty he just does it so you call him handsome !!

soobin (수빈)

soobin thinks you have absolutely no right to look that adorable,

at first he thought that he was endeared by you because you were simply cute,

but later on, he realized that he was head over heels for you.

even someone mentioning your name gets him all giggly and bubbly

you're his serotonin boost <3

if you compliment him in any way he's going to get shy, quick to cover his blushing face,

but whenever he's feeling down the compliment just floats up from the back of his mind and makes his day 10x better.

can't sleep because all he can think about is you and your pretty smile, cuddles a plushie he stole from huening kai wishing it was you :(

very hesitant to hug you or just have any sort of physical contact with you

like he really wants to, but the closest he gets to holding your hand is accidentally brushing his knuckles against yours

and even that small action has his mind racing, heart beating out of his chest as his awkward giggles fill the room.

if you hold his hand or hug him tho, he's going to melt in your arms :(

just whipped from the start.

rest of the members are under the cut ...

beomgyu (범규)

my guy already knew he liked you the second he laid his eyes on you.

but it was all platonic at first,

the more he got to know you, though, the more attached he became.

tries to spend as much time as he can with you, just wants you to notice him :(

teases you to no end, poking your sides, tickling you, getting all up in your face,

constantly asking you to play video games with him.

just craves your attention !!

very clingy <3

leans on your shoulder, holds your hand, slings his arm around you, puts his hand on your waist, etc.

is quite quick to realize that he had developed a crush,

and is also quick to catch on to the fact that you also have feelings for him.

honestly how could you not...

he takes it slow though, doesn't want to rush into a relationship.

literally treats you like his girlfriend from the get-go, everyone and their mom knows that you two are a thing.

taehyun (태현)

quick to realize that he has feelings for you, just like beomgyu

but also the quickest to try and push them away before he falls even harder,

yeah... that didn't work.

tries to impress you with his intellect and amazing vocals,

if you compliment him he's going to break into a grin, complimenting you back with no hesitation.

never stutters or feels too nervous around you, but it's all in the body language.

like the way he listens to you so attentively when you speak, paying attention to every word you say so he doesn't miss anything,

or the way he always stays close to you! choosing the seat next to yours in public transport, walking next to you when going out with the others

the way he straightens his posture the moment he sees you walking into the room, the way he never breaks eye contact with you, his stare lingering on your figure every now and then, scanning your every move.

the members caught on sooner or later, which is what taehyun feared the most !!

sure soobin and yeonjun can keep a secret, but god forbid beomgyu and huening kai from even speaking to you </3

huening kai (휴닝카이)

huening kai has had lots of small crushes before, so he thought that this one would perish just like the others,

oh how wrong he was...

a few months passed and the feelings only grew stronger, his chest tingling at the thought of you being his.

the other members know he likes you, but don't really tease him about it that much. except beomgyu

welcome to... how to know if huening kai likes you 101

he lets you touch, grab, play, even borrow his plushies,

he trusts you and only you with his precious stuffed animals :(

absolute heart eyes whenever he sees you playing with tobin, hugging it and protecting it from the members !!

even bigger heart eyes when you awkwardly shuffle over to him and ask him if you can hold his new plush,

eyes sparkling when he agrees with a bright smile as his blush impossibly deepens, handing you the stuffed animal in question.

you're also the only person he texts back immediately (besides his family members and managers)

[delululand]

who send that txt’s red and green flags? u r a godsent! id like to add something on red flags since we all know the members are waving green flags 🤭

sb - i think one of his red flags would be fickleness? idk if i would be able to explain it well but he mentioned before that he hates being adult because of responsibilities. based on that, i can see him expressing his feelings toward the other person but then suddenly backing out because he suddenly feels overwhelmed with the thought of responsibilities that comes with relationship. he likes the person but he might be indecisive on whether he is ready to commit or not. (Not saying this is really him but just a possibility based on what ive observed with those type of ppl)

yj - fixer. sometimes he might be too focused on fixing whatever he thinks need fixing on his partner and that can be really annoying. while his moon in libra and mars in sagittarius might help him be ‘chill’.. that leo and virgo combination is no joke.

bg -u’ve said it right. it is his pettiness that can be a red flag. also the lack of communication with manipulative tendencies! if he’s the wrong one, he will have no trouble apologizing. he’s nice that way. but if his partner is the wrong one? yea good luck. he’d disappear and will make sure to make them feel guilty for it until they’re on their knees— 😶

tyun - im inlove with him so much im willing to ignore 🚩.. kidding! look, i’ve seen his chart and a lot of his personal planets r making aspect to his sun which made me think that his ego (sun) plays a huge role in his life and will definitely be one of his red flag. rn we see tyun mature side right? but i feel like anything that will hit his ego so hard can make the vicious side of him come out. his aries mars makes him easily reactive to those things. when he’s triggered, the only way to calm him down is to leave him alone.

hyuka - low self-esteem. among the members, he’s the one with a really low self esteem (all of them have but his goes deeper) im not gonna explain much other than it’s not really pleasant with these type of ppl. u gotta be strong or else they’ll drag u down with them. he’s a leo.. a leo with a healthy self esteem r the best and i know that hyuka will eventually get there.

that’s all. i dont think im able to explain my thoughts well😭 but lemme know what u think?

+ anyways i truly miss reading ur posts! and saw that enhypen’s post too! i love it!! would it possible to request one for txt too? thank u 😄

- ur fellow intp 💙

OMGGGG I WANNA SAY SO MUCH

first i love your mind soooo much, second you’re so good in astrology

i absolutely agree with your opinion about soobin, this is one of the things that I thought about but couldn’t articulate it. in my opinion he is quite mature and he is the leader of the group which makes him mature even more, but it seems like that is enough for him? like, on the one hand, it’s not that he’s not mature for a relationship, but rather he’s just not ready to take responsibility yet. + he said that he is not the kind of person who would lead a relationship or plan something and therefore would just agree with everything that his girlfriend wants, but this is also literally an abdication of responsibility to some extent. so, in my opinion, he either doesn’t want to take on extra responsibility because he’s tired of responsibility at work, or he’s not ready for it due to his young age, or he’s just that kind of person (but actually i think it affects everything together and may change with age, like i don’t think that he will be a person who will become a super leader in a relationship, but at least he will be okay with the responsibility that comes with the appearance of a relationship)

yeonjun yes and beomgyu absolutely yes. if he has a fight with his partner and the partner says something offensive to him, they won’t get away with just an apology, and for some reason i think that if it really hurt him, he would remember it every time in all next fights. and also sometimes he likes to do something like checks? like that time when he blocked taehyun to see if he would come to wish him a happy birthday

taehyun yes too and + soobin said that taehyun often gets offended that he doesn’t share his feelings and this can also be in some ways a red flag for people who have difficulty sharing feelings or who just don’t like it

speaking of kai, i understood what you mean and this is really true, but it is in him that it manifests itself as not being so burdensome for other people? like i mean my work in korea was partly related to this area and i could see and sometimes communicate with different musicians/actors/dancers and other media personas and one of the most surprising things is when you look at them you think “wow this person is so cool, they are beautiful, they are smart, they are interesting personas, they have good singing/dancing/whatever skills” but when communicating with these people, most of them have very low self-esteem but they don’t seem to focus on it. i don’t know how to explain this more correctly, but it’s like the difference between people who due to low self-esteem really pull people around them to the bottom and people for whom it’s like something background that you might not even recognize right away. but idk whatever i hope kai can handle with this and it seems he has already changed for the better

and thank you so much for writing this!!! if you don’t mind i’ll leave a link to this in main post, people should see this too!

[prodtrouver]

TXT Reacts to your Classmates shipping both of you!

☾︎᯽☽︎ CRUSH AU • FLUFF • MENTIONS OF SHIPPING 2 PEOPLE, SHOVING/PUSHING, TEASING • INSPIRED BY THE SCENARIOS IN MY CLASS' DISCORD CHAT ☾︎᯽☽︎

☁︎ . . . yeonjun

It was all good until you and Yeonjun came into the classroom at the same time, coincidentally.

Your classmates started teasing both of you, happy to see you guys together (not in a couple way though) after all those cute moments in your class group chat.

You got so shy while Yeonjun enjoyed most of it. He laughed before you both went to his seat, talking about your annoying science teacher, oblivious to your classmates taking pictures of both of you.

It was only until you got home and saw the taken pictures.

Whilst you were 'fighting' with a few of your classmates about the pictures, Yeonjun was enjoying every second of it.

He even joined them, just to tease you 💔

You: pls stop taking pictures of us 😭

Yeonjun: idk I think they're cute ;)

Classmates: GET A ROOM SHIP

OTHERS UNDER THE CUT!

☁︎ . . . soobin

Shy Soobin. Just at your gorgeous and wonderous presence, he already gets flustered. The way you're so sweet and nice to everyone warms his heart.

So as soon as you and Soobin started talking in your classroom's groupchat, your classmates were freaking out.

Classmate: SINCE WHEN DID WE HAVE ANOTHER SHIP!?

Soobin would deny then while you kept going, getting some joy and delight in the shipping. Soobin would even send nervous emotes and you would send ones with hearts.

Yeah, you enjoy making Soobin flustered 💔 while his crush on you grew bigger.

Don't even get your classmates started when you and Soobin hang out personally. He is such a shy bunny and you're like his owner ♥️

Please, your classmates will make a Discord channel dedicated for you and Soobin only.

☁︎ . . . beomgyu

He's going to be teasing nonstop. If your classmates sees both of you together and proceeds to cheer for you and Beomgyu, this boy will literally give them service.

He'll pull you closer, lean to your ears or something, just to add more fuel to the fire. You would be so embarrassed.

Although, Beomgyu enjoys teasing you, he makes sure to never cross the line. That's what makes you like him, he respects you and knows of you are uncomfortable.

He's also very caring ♥️ actually, that's how the shipping started, in the classroom's groupchat.

You: I'm in tears, ma'am hates me ;-;

Beomgyu: it's okay, yn! You did great, ma'am was just being a bitch 🙄

Classmates: yieee, new ship new ship 👁️👁️

Beomgyu continues to be caring but a big tease. You're okay with it though, it is Choi Beomgyu.

Who wouldn't be okay with him? 💞

☁︎ . . . taehyun

He'll be very calm, almost like he doesn't give a damn. He's naturally caring and genuinely looks out for you. He shows this in both face to face and online.

He doesn't even hide it and that's how it was so obvious and easy for your classmates to see how much he cares for you 💞

You: I got a paper cut bcs of sir >:(

Taehyun: do you have a bandaid? Make sure to wash it first and wrap it with a bandaid so it won't sting

Classmate: why won't Taehyun talk to me like that 💔 I'm starting to think you're both dating

Not as extra as Beomgyu, but he makes it obvious. He also makes you shy sometimes but mixes it with love.

Of course, you'll both get shy too but he likes seeing you shy, he finds it cute 💘

Because of that, he'll continue being himself and won't stop your classmates from shipping you both. Just because you're cute 💝

☁︎ . . . huening kai

He'll probably be the only member to deny the shipping, even if he does like you. He's thinking you'll be uncomfortable with it.

He does add more fuel to the fire if he sees you doing it too, but if he sees you to tell them to stop, he'll do it too. He'll apologize in DMs when it gets out of hand.

He really cares about how you feel 💔

You: okay that's a weird scenario of me and Kai, stop it

Kai: guys! Yn said stop >:(

You: aw, Kai 🥺

Classmate: how can we stop WHEN YOU'RE BOTH LIKE THAT!? STOP ACTING LIKE THAT DJENDKRMDKD

Kai does take care of you though, cheers you up when down, and gives you snacks. He'll also go to you during school breaks and your classmates would witness everything 😭

Oftentimes, you both don't give a damn and pay attention on each other.

Other times, you both will get shy but lowkey enjoys the shipping. (But of course, neither of you will admit that)

Gen. hc taglist: @iminchaosnow @glorybeom @staysstrays @tonightletspretend @at-the-end-of-your-letter

[luvr4u]

random dates you have with txt

pairing : ot5 x reader

genre : fluff fluff fluff !!

wc : 421

content warning : slight mention of food, nothing much I think

a/n : this is my first ever time writing so please be nice to me

Yeonjun • mini fashion shows!! • the both of you basically pick out outfits for each other from your/his wardrobe • he genuinely tries but sometimes you like to play a lil prank on him by making him wear stuff he would 100% wouldn’t normally • eg: cat ears • but hey it’s all fun and games • would hype you up so much • a lil aggressive tbh- • ‘ wow! amazing! great! beautiful! stunning! jaw droppi- ‘ • ‘ yeah, yeah I get it jjun ‘

• gives you the goofiest lil smile </3 • he is just so whipped for you

rest of the boys under the cut!

Soobin • okay I just CANNOT get over baking dates with soob  • you know the cliché flour on your cheeks and batter on your noses • AAAA SO CUTE • he would so kiss away the frosting that got on your lips- • would let you lick the pans clean  • he would soo insist on doing the dishes no matter how many times you say you’d do it for him • he knows you don’t enjoy doing it, so he just asks you to keep him company <3

Beomgyu • Movie dates!! • shouting at the screen when the characters do something stupid all the time • ‘ don’t go there right now you idiot you don’t wanna see that !! ‘ • ‘ and ofc he went there 🙄 ‘ • him laughing at you when you cry during the movie • ( will never admit that he may have teared up a tiiiny bit ) • looking at each other during particularly romantic scenes!! • it’s so cute I cannot-

Taehyun • cozy at-home dates!! • idk he just likes more ~intimate~ stuff and wants it to be just the 2 of you? • he kicks out the other members from the dorm ofc • I don’t think he’ll be that picky on what to do as long as he could do it with you <3 • please this boy has my whole heart- • you could just be reading a book together or building a pillow fort • basically anything that’s not against the law • unless-

Huening Kai • picnic dates >.< • he seems like the type to plan every single thing when it comes to a date • so he’d pick a bit of a secluded spot, check the weather, make sure everything is packed properly, etc. • he’d take so many pictures of you </3 • ‘ omg y/n you look so pretty rn pose for me !! ‘ • would definitely spoon feed you ( no is not an answer ) • would literally melt if you spoon fed him too!! he’s all giggly and giddy with happiness

also making you flower crowns!! well at least tries to

bonus : you guys made the food together !

[el-hawthorne]

TXT - Hogwarts AU Pt. 2

Summary: You are their bestie and got sorted to the same house like theirs.

Warning: no proofread, txt members being crackhead as always.

TXT Masterlist

🐰 Choi Soobin

- hufflepuff

- he really happy, knowing that you are on the same houses just like him

- He helps you to learn every night

- did I mention you that he is a prefect?

- he is protective over you, since you are literally younger than him and innocent. That's why he can't say no if you're the one who asked him favor

- when you are sick? Nah, he ditch his class just to take care of you

- he already promise your parents that he would protect you, even marry you. He said the last words jokingly to ease the tension between you and him. But deep down, he wanted it to happen tho.

🦊 Yeonjun

- his parents and your parents are the pure bloods

- before you got sorted he already asked more space for your seat beside him

- he already expecting that you would become a slytherin just like him

- so he wasn't surprise when you got sorted into slytherin

- really good at playing quidditch

- everyone knows that your seat is always beside him

- would trick you to ditch your study group and makes you watching him practicing quidditch

🐻 Beomgyu

- Goofy gryffindor is his middle name

- you lowkey embarrassed when he shout the loudest at you because you got sorted into gryffindor

- the one who always drag you to watch him playing quidditch

- more than willing to ditch his class when you are sick

- would do anything foolish just to makes you feel better when you are at your low

- the one who wake you up in the middle of the night to sneak out using marauder's map

- his parents promise you, if you can make him behave at school, you can have a dragon as your pet. But Beomgyu wouldn't let that, "How dare you abandon our child? Toto would probably get mad at you!"

🐿 Taehyun

- Ravenclaw

- He wonder how can you got sorted into ravenclaw?

- because in his eyes, you are that idiot yet clumsy but cute type of person

- He pats his seat, so you can sit beside him

- he will always company you when you go to the house, because you can't answer the question to open the door

- even if he's tired, he always help you when you need help, even if you didn't ask anyone

- His shoulder to cry on is always available when you facing bad day

🐑 Hueningkai

(El: don't blame me, he is cute like a sheep, I love him, okay?)

- hufflepuff

- the happiest person when you got sorted into hufflepuff

- same like Soobin, he will ditch his class when he knows you aren't okay. (I mean, he will be the one who initiate to ditch the class when you're feeling down. Because he knew you wouldn't focus on your class anyway)

- will bring you some snacks when you two watching quidditch game together

- will sneak out in the middle of the night to asking the fairies some food for your midnight snack

- Hagrid and Fang are literally his best friends

- "Hey Fang, don't look at her like that! She's mine!"

El: I think I have writer block 😔 but I will still try my best to stay update with you guys. I still on my work with Beomgyu Mafia AU I love you ❤

It's 9.34 am. here, have a nice day/evening

Sincerely,

- El

[skzfairies]

highlights of yuri at the seoul concert 2022!

note: uhhhhh i make quite a few lesbian jokes in this (i am lesbian) , lots of cursing ???? mentions of kissing ‼️‼️mentions of feelings unloved (only mentioned) , yuri makes a sad speech and cries :((

taglist: @chaerincore @atzaria @ateezjuliet @shinyddeonghwa @m00niesk7 @srkuv @hyuncore

day 1

sooooo many of yuri’s friends and ateez’s friends were there that day omg

her favorite girl in the world yuqi was there!! as well as minnie!!!

all of C4 was there, and nako and yeonjun of txt too!! (@chaerincore) !!! some seventeen (mingyu, dk, seungkwan, and dino), some twice members were there (chaeyoung, nayeon, mina). purple kiss’ chaein yuki and ireh was there, somi and nayoung were there. so was 3RACHA and blaise!!! just so many people omg oh and pentagons yanan, yuto and yeo one were also there !!!!

honorable mention: sapphire!!! all of sapphire was there and people WERE SCREAMING because yuri and jae ‼️‼️ everyone’s fav siblings <333

jae was throughly scandalized because HE SAW HIS LITTLE SISTER LITERALLY HIP THRUSTINF ???? his life literally FLASHED BEFORE HIS MF EYES 😭

also clarification: the oldest member and leader of sapphire, jae, is yuri’s older brother !

continuing !! feel free to ask me any questions about that !!

WHEN YURI FIGURED OUT THAT THE SEO CHANGBIN WAS AT THEIR CONCERT SHE FUCKING FLIPPED OMG

hyewon of C4 literally texted her like 10 mins before the concert and was like “...i brought someone special👀👀” AND THEN SHE SENT A SELFIE OF HER AND CHANGBIN AND YURI FREAKED OUT

SHE DEADASS DROPPED JER PHONE AND SCREAMED 😭😭😭😭

she was like “oh my god oh my god oh my god” AND SHE COULDNT SAY ANYTHING SO SHE JUST SHOWED RHE BOYS THE SELFIE AND DID A HAPPY DANCW PLEASEEEE

ateez was like “you’ve literally been friends with him for months...AND you technically debuted before him 💀💀💀SO WHY ARE YOU ACTINF LIKE THIS🚶‍♂️🚶‍♂️”

LET YURI FANGIRL OKAY LEAVE HER ALONEEEE

yuri biggest changbin supporter YUP YUP YUP plz changbin finds it adorable of how much yuri admires him 😭😭

yuri kept waving at them during the concert and she kept sending hearts and smiles to all of her friends during the concert, especially yuqi!!! she ended up mentioning all of the groups friends who ended up coming and gave yuqi a sweet message :(( everyone was freaking out because !!!! songmi !!! the nations cutest best friends (😳)

ireh, chaein and yuki were holding up a banner with yuri’s face on it and it said “yuri it girl !” and yuri loved it so much omg :((( she pulled all of the members over to see it omg 😭😭 she adores her girls sm <333

AND YUQI HAD SO MUCH ATEEZ MERCH ON PLEASEEE SHE WAS ONE PROUD GIRLFRIEND 🤞🤞🤞

there was so many interactions between c4 yuri, yunho, and seonghwa FANS WERE LIVING FOR ITT

south korea’s sweethearts yunkura IN THE HOUSE ‼️‼️‼️

please yuri was giggling so much when yunho saw sakura holding up a yunho banner BECAUSE MAN WAS BLUSHING SO MF HARD PLZZZZX

yuri also suprised everyone with her blonde hair but now it is BLACK!!!! she looks so hot ON GOD

miss girl gave it her ALL during all of the days, you could tell that she was so so excited to be there and she was ready to tour !!!

she was also kinda emotional because this was her first ever concert in seoul since she missed the one in 2020 :(( this is be mentioned again later so remember that !!

ATINIES GOT SO MUCH HONGRI AND WOORI CONTENT THIS DAY OMG

wooyoung literally was poking yuri’s cheeks every chance he got 😭😭 everytime he did it yuri just side - eyed him 😭😭😭 SHE WAS STARTING TO GET FED UP

but she got him back by running up to him randomly and tickling him when he was about to sing his part in wave heheh yuri villian era moment 😍

and hongjoong and yuri were absolutely VINBINGGGG TOGETHER

they were definitely feeling themselves that night 🥰🥰

and hongjoong would also come up and check up on her when he could and it was subtle things but atiny still caught it !!!

you could see hongjoong mouthing ‘are you okay’ and he held her hand during a lot of the intermissions !!! he was just really worried for her since this was her first seoul concert and she had been really anxious about the upcoming tour so :((( he just wanted to make sure she was alright

which she was !!! 100% !!!! she was so so excited and she was so ready ! she did amazing !!!

please yuri and yunho had so much fun during wave, they kept on goofing around together it was ADORABLE 😭

she did the little wave dance with him :( PRECIOUS

also yuri looked GORGEOUS in the white outfits LIKE YES MAAM ‼️

plz san yuri and yunho were giggling so much because they kept on tapping each other’s butts randomly 😭😭 CHILDERN i tell you CHILDERN

OMG YURI HIT SEONGHWA’S BUTT SO RANDOMLY AND HE LITERALLY LOOKED SO SCANDALIZED PLEASEEEE yuri was LOOSING IT

yuri wooyoung and yeosang all showed off their abs during deja vu I AM GOING INSANE I AM SO WHIPPED HELLO

omg mingi yunho and yuri were being the cutest trio ever during better IM SOBBING THEIR FRIENDSHIP IS SO CUTE

the three of them just kept dancing together IT WAS ADORBALEEEE

YURI WAS SO CLOSE TO CRYING DURING DECLARATION MISS GIRL WAS HOLDING IN HER TEARS THE WHOLE NIGHT

when she got into postion she was getting CHILLS SHE WAS SO EXCITED OMG

yiu couldn’t see it but yuri had such a proud smile on her face as woosan danced :((( SHE LOVES HER BIYS SM

after the third outfit change IT WAS LIKE SOMETHING CAME ALIVE IN YURI SNSJSJS SHES ATTACKING US ALLLL

um so she totally didnt do MANY body rolls during to the beat NOPE NOPE IDK WHAT UR SAYINF SHE TOTALLT DIDNT AND THEN TOTALLY DIDNT WINK AND SMIRK AFTER COUGH COUGH

she also hip thrusted like ONCE during the leaders PLZ YURI PLZ LET US LIVE PLZ LET US LIVE

did she make eye contact with yuqi when she hip thrusted?? SHE MOST DEF DID HELLO WHO DO YOU THINK WE ARE TALKING ABOUT 🙄🙄

they were performing her favorite songs SO OFC SHES GONNA GO FULL OUT

omg san yeosang and yuri were PARTYING IT UP DURING GOOD LITTLE BOY

THEY KEPT RUNNING PAST EACH ORHER AND GAVE EACH OTHER HIGHFIVES PLZ THEYVWERE SO HAPPT

yeosang even ran around the stage with yuri on his back THEY WERE HAVING SO MUCH FUN OMG

HELLO THE TRANSITION FROM GOOD LITTLE BOT TO THE LEADERS HELLO YESSS SNSNSNSN THATS IMMACULATE

YURI JUMPED SO HIGH WHEN THE BEAT DROPPED AND SHE LANDED ON BEAT TOO PLZ LEGEND THINGS ME THINKS

THE LEADERS YURI IS A DIFFERENT YURI OMG

GIRL WAS SJSJSISJSJS

SHE WAS KILLING IT

SHE WAS STRUTTING HERSELF AS SHE MF SHOULDDDD

no bcuz if you didn’t survive the leaders yuri YOU WOULD NOT SURVIVE THANXX YURI HELLO

YURI WAS HAVING THE TIME OF HER MF LIFE DURING ROCKY OH MY FOD HELLO SOMEONE CONTROL THIS WOMENNBB

SHE WAS SO HOT OMG IM SCREAMING

SHE WAS FEELING HERSELFFF

no because she KEPT SMIRKING AND SHE WAS SO COCKY PLEASE IM IN LOVE WITH COCKT YURI

ALSO SHE LITERALLY GROWLEDDDDD “SAY MY NAME” THERE WAS SO MANY SCREAMS AFTER THAT 😭 (yuqi included 😭😭)

she also chereographed rocky !!! WHAT IS IT WITH THIS GIRL AND HIP THRUSTS OMG

i think this is her indirect way of saying she’s a lesbian ??? 😭😭😭 (ifykyk)

also IF YOU THINK YURI DIDNT GO FULL FULL OUT FOR ROCKY THEN YOU ARE SOOOOO WRONG

MISS GIRL WAS LOKE A MF DEMON

MINGI TOSSED THE CHAMPIONS BELT TO YURI FOR HER PART AND SHE HELP IT UP WITH SUCH A COCKY SMIRK HELLO THIS WOMEN IS INSANEEEEEE

yuri was OWNING the stage

and omg when the intermisson came yuri was literallt being so adorable LIKE SHE WASNT JUST HIP THRUSTING FIVE MINUTES AHO HELLO

omg yuri was center for the gayo intto (intros to the real) AND SNSJSJSNSN SHE DID IT SO WELL OMG

yuri isnt half of the industries types for nothing 🙄🙄

okay guys we are switching gears ‼️‼️‼️‼️ ETERNAL SUNSHINE TIME BABY

SHE HAS HER HAIR IN LITTLE PIGTSILS AND SHE WAS WEARING THE BLANKET SOME OF THE FUYSBHAD AROUND HER NECK LIKE A CAPE IM FREAKING SOBBING

OH OH OH STORY TIME STORY TIKE so originally yuri just had the blanket draped over her, but seonghwa had came over and he was like UR SO CUTE STOP IT he ended up fixing her pigtails because they were lopsided from her literally bouncing around SHES A CHILD

and yuri literally kept dropping her blanket so seonghwa ended up tying it around like a cape IT WAS SO ADORABLE HWARI FATHER AND DAUGHTER MOMENT ME THINKS

AND THEN THEY LOOPED THEIR ARMS TOGETHER AND JUST SKIPPED AROUND THE STGE IM NOT CEYING YOU ARE

and she kept on running around to pop to bubbles it was ADORABLE and you could see jongho giggling at her omg jongri ARE THE CUTEST

jongho ended up running over to her and gave her a back hug and lifted her up IM SOBBING ETERNAL SUNSHINE YURI IS THE CUTEST YURI

yuri was so suprised she was like wHO TF IS LIFTING ME

but her and jongho danced with each other for the rest of eternal sunshine they are literally the cutest duo IM CRYING

wooyoung also recorded yuri popping the bubbles and yeosang joined her a little bit im crying he was smiling SO HARD everyone adores yuri sm omg

good thing yuri only has one part in eternal sunshine or else she prolly would have forgotten to sing because she was having so much fun 😭

during dancing like butterfly wings yuri ran off the stage and made a little circle running around omg HOW DOES SHE HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY

um so um .... as soon as star 1117 started playing YURI WAS IN TEARS ALREADY AND NO ONE SANG YET

she wasnt sobbing yet DW DW

but as she was looking around the stadium she just realized how loved she was, she was loved by her many friends that came, ateez, atiny, her family (both blood and non blood), and she ended up making eye contact with yuqi and that just made her tears come FASTER

because all through out her life yuri has struggled and struggled to find happiness and to feel like she was actually loved, and she has finally felt happiness and joy and that she was genuinely loved, and as she was looking the crowd she just kinda had a moment where reality had came rushing to her yk ?

she thought of everything that had happened for her to be in that exact moment, and even though alot of the memories were painful, it was so so worth it to her because she met some of the greatest people ever in her journey

she was happy to be there, to be living, to be smiling and to be healed, and she was so proud of herself. she had finally achieved what she wanted to achieve for years, and that was happiness and peace. while things may not perfect, she knows that if a trouble were to arise, she knew she would be okay in the end:(

around mid song was when yuri started to sob, and hongjoong and wooyoung both had their arms around her because :((( yuri had been through so much and even though yuri didn’t tell them the reason, they knew ;(

and the three of them just kept swaying back and forth while all of them cried :(( they all were hugging each other’s waist and looking at the audience :((( i’m not crying you are

but at the end of star1117 when everyone got the chance to talk, that made yuri cry even harder 😭, she wanted to speak but she wasn’t really coherent because of how hard she was crying :(((

she ended up having to take a breather and calm herself down before she was able to speak THE WHOLE CROWD WAS CHEERING FOR HER AND THAT MADE HER SMILE SO :(((

i’m gonna kinda draft what yuri said ??? so don’t hate me if it’s crap okay

“these past few years have been so hard for me, with facing hardships with my personal life and with my mental health, it had been a rough few years. all my life i have been chasing and chasing the dream of being happy and living life at peace. when i was younger, i thought happiness was only a dream. i thought that i would never be able to overcome all the hardships that i had to face to get here. but as i look back at all of my memories, both bad and good, it feels like it was worth it. because if i didn’t have any of those hardships, then i wouldn’t be standing here and be the person i am today. it took me awhile to get to where i am now, but i am finally happy. i’m finally proud of myself and i’m at peace at where i am today. and i couldnt do it without any of you. i couldn’t do it without atiny, my members, my friends...yuqi. my lovely yuqi is here tonight, and so are many of my friends and ateez’s friends too. yuqi was always there for me...i think she’s the person i’m most grateful to. yuqi, i love you!!!!”

miss girl was literally having the BIGGEST URGE to run over to yuqi and giving her the biggest kiss but YKKKK she’ll save thay for another time 👀👀

YURI HAD SO MUCH FUN THOUGH OMG !!!

she didn’t want the concert to end but :((( it did sadly 💔

yuri is so so excited to continue to tour though !!! it’s her favorite thing ever <33

BACKSTAGE TIMEEE

the moment yuri had got off stage and was able to greet all of the friends and family that had came for the concert, yuri had RAN to see yuqi, and as soon as she reached the girl, she picked her up and placed a big, loving and passionate kiss on the girls lips, one yuqi happily returned, infront of half of the staff and all of ateez’s friends and family 😭

both of them were in their own world , they didn’t even realize that everyone was watching them until woosan had started applauding 😭😭

ateez’s family members were like 😧😧 THEY ARE DATING ??? HOW COME NONE OF YOU FOOLS TOLD ME YURI HAD A GIRLFRIEND ???

ateez had gotten a scolding from their parents for not telling them 😭😭 and songmi had gotten MANY congratulations from ateez’s family members and many comments on how cute they were aftet that 😭😭

SONGMI WAS A BLUSHING MESS 😭😭

but the girls held hands while yuri went around and said hello to everyone :((( MY LOVES <333

jae may have or may have not scolded her for hip thrusting and body rolling so many times 😭😭

“so what you’re telling me is that i’m not hot? WOW, WOWWW, i thought you were my brother? THIS IS SO RUDE I CANT BELIEVE YOU 🙄🙄”

jae literally CANT BREATHE 😭😭😭

he was just standing there like 😧😧 when yuri was being overdramatic 😭😭 she ended up flipping her hair in his face and walked away 😭😭😭but after she screamed ‘i love you!!!’ to him before walking over to C4 😭😭 jae ended up following her the rest of the night and kept purposely annoying her 😭😭

c4 was like 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️ are we about to witness some murder right now ??

sakura MOST DEFINITELY TEASED THE LIVING HELL OUT OF YURI FOR KISSING YUQI INFRONT OF EVERYONE PLZ 😭😭

yuri was literally like “don’t act like you wouldn’t have done the same thing with yunho 🙄🙄✋✋”

oH MY GOD WHEN CHANGBIN CAME UP TO HER SHE WAS ABOUT TO LOOSE IT ENDJSJ

changbin complimented her on her performance that night and said that she did really well, AND YURI WAS ABOUT TO LOOSE ITTTT SHE WAS THIS 🤏 CLOSE TO PASSING OUT

she STUTTERED SM WHEN SHE THANKED CHANGBIN PLZ

jae and yuqi were clowning her SO HARD once changbin walked away 😭😭 miss girl was IN TEARS

and omg yuri and jae got so many hugs from ateez’s mom’s that night :((( because they all literally adopted yuri and jae 😭😭 they adore them two so much

AND ATEEZ’S PARENTS KEPT LOOKING BACK AND FORTH FROM YURI AND YUQI 😭😭😭 THE GIRLS WERE GETTING SO SHY PLZ

idk what days ateez parents came to so uhhhh if this is inaccurate lemme know

mingi’s mom pulled yuri to the side before all of the. left and was like “you better marry that girl, and you better invite me🥰” AND YURI WAS LITERALLY LIKE 😧😧 THE WOMAN WAS TOO STUNNED TO SPEAK

whos gonna tell her that yuri may or may not have been thinking about how she would propose to yuqi before she goes to sleep at night 👀👀

AND OH MY GOD

WHEN WOOYOUNG AND YURI WENT TO SAY HI TO SEVENTEEN

IT WAS SO CHAOTIC PLEASEEEE

SVT AND WOOYOUNG LITERALLY TEASED YURI SO MUCH FOR KISSING YUQI LMAOOO

YURI WILL NEVER LIVE THIS DOWN 😭😭

and omg :((( yuri and purple kiss IM CRYING they had such a cute interaction omg

purple kiss asked her to sign their fever part three albums as well as the rest of ateez, yURI WAS CRYING HER LOVES <3333

i realize i didn’t include every interaction with everyone who came but .... there was a interaction my brain is refusing to come up w anything so 😭😭😭 yuri was happy to see everyone and said hi to everyone and gave out lots and lots of hugs !!!

yuri will for sure cherish this night forever <3 when the night ended she posted selcas with all her friends that came and as well as a couple mirror selfie’s so !!!! atiny were well fed !!!

outfits:

the last outfit she was wearing a white long - sleeved ateez tour shirt with it tied like jennies shirt in the picture.

a/n: just realized that this is me screaming abt the concert i am so sorry but i’m really not 🙄