#mention of dying
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Heads up (read tags too) on what’s been going on.
Just a little heads up that my dad is dying and he’s probably going to go in the next week. It could be longer, but I went to see him today and he looked like a cadaver, barely clinging to life. This was probably the last time I’ll see him.
It’s been a harrowing few months for him, for my mum, and for me, and I want to thank those of you who knew and have been enormously kind. Our lives have been completely on hold while he’s been slipping away, and it’s clear that he’s not long for this world.
He smiled and knew who I was when I held his hands today, but he couldn’t speak and he couldn’t even turn his head or hold it in place or lift it from the pillow. He couldn’t drink and he’s so thin that they’ve stopped weighing him because he’s too ill for them to worry about that now. He honestly looked like a corpse in the bed already.
I just wanted to post this so anyone wondering where I’ve been and why I’ve not felt like doing much in the creative line of things for months can now hopefully just understand.
Thanks again for your kind thoughts and messages over the past few months. Please don’t feel like you need to add anything or reach out because of this, but I just wanted folks to know why I’ve been so reclusive and empty for the better part of this year so far.
Take care of yourselves, and let your loved ones know you love them, every chance you get.
#tw death#death#mention of death#death of parent#death of father#mention of dying#mention of dying parent#terminally ill parent#parental death#all the warning tags I can think of but lemme know if I missed one#non monster post#personal post
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tigger warning : mention of dying
rant?
its 1:40 am
im bored and im looking around thinking i could die at any moment
hell that i could kms at any moment and then boom gone
im also scared my is gonna get bored of me maybe thast why
i know he wont maube but
maybe something could kill me. like out of nowhere
i need angel i cant do shit by myself
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Because I’m such a coward to do it myself, I hope I’ll just get sick with terminal illness and die. There is no way to recover for me, I’m broken beyond repair and all my attempts to feel better always end up with my slipping back into hysteria. Nothing helps, absolutely nothing. Combined with government that took away my income and constantly says I shouldn’t exist, and ppl in family simply not understanding my pain... there is no escape for me. There will be no better life for me. I will rot in this hole and no one will remember I existed.
Ppl suddenly feel gentle and caring towards deceased person, which kind of funny because they never act like when the person was alive. Kind makes me feel that I’ll only be trully loved only after I’m gone. Which is sad, but I guess this kind of love would exist in some form, even if it mean I’ll never receive it.
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boxer!rafe holding his baby for the first time, and knowing him he made sure you had a private room and good food.
tell me why he would be so jittery though ??
୭ 🧷 ✧ ˚. ᵎᵎ 🎀 ୭ 🧷 ✧ ˚. ᵎᵎ 🎀
boxer!rafe never had gotten as scared as he did when you had given birth.
waiting. rafe had been waiting for hours, holding a lucky charm that you had given him. the strands of the bracelet were frayed as he toyed with it, over and over again. the smell of the hospital was nauseating, and the feeling of being in a place that smelt like antibiotics and sickness made his skin crawl.
he had gotten the call that your baby was born in the middle of a fight. he was on top of a guy before someone stormed in the middle of the fight. that was uncommon, and the referee quickly had them separated before rafe realised it was your work friend, delany. she looked frantic, as she tried to mouth something.
the minute he realised what it was, he was pulling the ropes of the ring, and yelling at people to get out of the way. blood was splattered across his mouth, and his swelling knuckles stung with pain, as his sweaty t-shirt stuck to his chest.
your water broke.
he was there in minutes, swearing as he tried to close the car. he'd run into the hospital with a huff, demanding to know where you were. to be quite frank it may have been sweet to you - but it was downright scary to the nurses.
a bulky guy with blood splattered all over him, holding a silly pink baby bag. the first nurse let out an uncomfortable laugh before telling him to sit down. now, rafe would have started yelling, but there was this drumming in his heart that made him feel as if he was going to vomit.
he couldn't lose you, no, this was a critical part of all of it. he'd read those stupid books that you had gotten him about pregnancy, and how dangerous it was, and how many mothers had died and how to hold a baby, and, and-
(goddamn it, he was scared.)
"mr. cameron. would you like to come in?"
he looked up to see a nurse with a painful smile, he took a deep breath before nodding his head. rafe felt his hands shake, as he took a step inside the room.
there you were, pretty as always with that discharge night gown, and a relieved sweaty smile on your face. you look so calm, but his eyes zone on your hands. the baby isn't in your hands, and he found himself wondering where the baby was, but he watched you get up to touch him.
"hey, hey baby. calm down. you need to stay like that," he muses, coming closer to rub your shoulders. you close your eyes, a soft gasp coming out of your mouth.
rafe gives you a soft peck on the shoulder, "why didn't you call me?" he whispers in that gentle tone of his. you squirm, peeling open your eyes with those pleading doe eyes,.
"i didn't want to bother you. i knew-" you gasped out, "i knew you had that important match and shit, and i don't know i thought it was like a bad time-"
rafe cursed, "didn't i tell you it was the two of us together? i shoulda' been there for you. shoulda' have held your hand through this shit-" and he knew he's going on a tangent as your lip wobbled and he quickly licked his lips while shaking his head.
"nah, it doesn't matter now. aw, my sweet girl did this all by herself. let me," he muttered, rubbing tears off your cheeks, "where's the baby?" you sniffled, nuzzling your face in his hands, before pointing to the sinks where he saw a small tiny girl.
she's squirming in the nurse's hands, as she gets washed off. her tiny face is squished up as she lets out small squeals. he's struck by how small, how tiny, how he made that little thing with you.
"i-" he choked up unable to take his eyes off your baby, "thank you sweets. thank you." his head bowed down into your lap, the words like worship. he was a devout in your temple.
"here's the baby, ms. cameron."
you looked up at her, a little bundle of joy as the doctor put her in your lap. rafe felt like everything was complete, feeling his throat sting and his hands get clammy. god, what did he do to deserve this?
the baby was perfect, a tiny sweet thing and rafe's hands shook at his sides as you looked up at him with teary eyes.
"do you want to hold her?"
he swallowed hard, his voice that soft whisper you knew so well, "can i?"
you laughed something that was so sweet, ringing in his ear like a song he never wanted to end. yet, he couldn't help but look at you with approval and when he looked into your eyes all he saw was love. all he saw was the truth. finally, he reached for his baby girl, calloused hands cradling her.
he finally had found his family.
#boxer!rafe#rafe imagine#rafe outer banks#obx fic#rafe x you#fluff#rafe x reader#rafe cameron#rafe obx#drabble#tw pregnancy#tw mentions of birth#dad!rafe au#dad!rafe cameron#rafe concepts#rafe fanfiction#angst#rafe cameron x reader#outerbanks rafe#obx rafe cameron#rafe cameron prompts#rafe cameron prompt#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe cameron imagines#shy!reader#ok i kinda hate this but whatever#ARHHH DYING OF CUTENESS#rafe cameron fluff
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It is so, so important to me that people understand that Tim didn't figure out the bats because Dick was a "Show off". Like yes, Dick Grayson is the most flamboyant, dramatic ass man you will ever meet.
But the quadruple somersault? There's no way that was because dick was just showing off. Because you're telling me Bruce Wayne, who's so committed to hiding his identity that he literally acts like a completely different person out of the mask in public just to ward suspicion, would miss the fact that Robin regularly uses the flying Grayson's trademark move? There's literally no way.
In the comics we see Tim explain his deductive process to Dick and Alfred and they're both surprised impressed whatever. We don't see him explain it to Bruce. I think Bruce would be surprised and shocked that a 9 year old was able to put the pieces together but I don't think he'd be surprised that the quadruple somersault gave it away.
So if Bruce was possibly aware of such an obvious give away, why let it continue?
I'll tell you why.
It really comes down to the physics
So Dick was 9 when he started out right? That means the most he'd have likely weighed was 43kgs or roughly 95lbs in freedom units.
But Dick and both of his parents are gymnasts who tend to be smaller. So he was likely less than that.
In physics, rotating objects build up angular momentum (this is how bikes stay up right for example). The more rotation, the more momentum. And objects with less mass build up that momentum much faster than those that are heavier.
Robin constantly has to fight people who are nearly 3 times his size. I teach 8 year olds, they're tiny. A quadruple somersault for a small boy that weighs less than a hundred pounds is a brutal weapon. Especially if you add in the acceleration from gravity as he drops in from above.
And I can guarantee you this logic tracks because Dick literally utilizes this idea, without the somersault, in the 2009 teen titans cartoon.
Yeah, that's right. We're talking about the infamous knee drop.
Like it is borderline savage. Add in a quadruple somersault and the resulting force is nearly fatal. It's likely the main reason Batman would ever allow him to do it with the cape on.
Also, Dick landing feet first on the penguin in the first image probably gave the guy severe back issues
#I'm so tired of people giving Dick shit for being a show off#like he is for sure#but thats not what gave him away#it's strategic and practical#he's using the skills he already had in his repertoire to his advantage#also unrelated but#when Tim shows up to convince dick to be robin again#and has to explain how he figured it out#it was just after the arc where dick and bruce had to deal with tony zucco getting out of prison and nearly starting a gang war#pretty sure zucco dies sometime during it#but it brings up a lot of feelings for dick#which is the entire reason Tim finds him at Haley's circus in new york#then Tim immediately reminds him about his parents death again#and technically jasons too because thats his entire purpose for being there#point is#dick was going THROUGH it when Tim shows up#idk thought it bore mentioning#lena speaks#batman#tim drake#dc comics#robin#batman and robin#dick grayson#bruce wayne#nightwing#dc robin#dc analysis#a lonely place of dying#physics
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"thank you senpai.... for letting me live" THIS LINE ALWAYS MAKES ME WANNA SCREAM AND CRY STOP THIS
#He was just a child#Going through all that hell#I'm still kinda annoyed hori never explored his trauma of literally dying and getting tortured brutally#Like if you never want to mention it what's the point#Bakugou Katsuki#Katsuki Bakugou#Bakugo Katsuki#Katsuki bakugo#Katsuki#Kacchan#Bakugo#Mha#Bnha#My hero academia#Also his conclusion with edgeshot was so short#The fact that he never had a talk with at least one of these ppl: best jeanist#Aizawa and Izuku and even monoma#Like they were there and were traumatized but nothing later#And yall know why🤦🏻♀️
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The thing about Commander Cody fans is that they will see a Cody that is five pixels max and experience shrimp emotions
It's me I'm Commander Cody fans
#one of my roommates can attest to the fact that rex mentioned Cody in rebels once and I immediately made a noise like a dying whale#hes not just a blorbo to me. hes a comfort character <3#commander cody#marshal commander cody#cc 2224#beans rambles#star wars
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i'm seeing these posts so i'm gonna do it just for fun (knowing i'll get five notes at most), but writer's version:
100 notes and i'll try to post regularly on instagram.
200 notes and i'll make a routine to write daily.
300 notes and i'll start to exercise, drink more water, eat fruit and study more.
500 notes and i'll FINISH WIPS (works in progress).
1k notes and i'll EDIT MY BOOK.
2k notes and i'll propose marriage to my best friend.
5k notes and i'll go to mexico to see a boy (please don't) (i'll never get 5k (i hope)).
EDIT: Y'ALL ARE CRAZYY. crying bc now i'll have to do the stuff but i love you all.
#if this gets x notes#if this gets 100 notes#if this gets more than 10 notes i'm dying#not to mention 1k#writer#writing#writers on tumblr#writing community#books#fix my life#health#health and wellness#resolutions#motivation#inspiration#motivate me#inspire me#procrastination#this is going to be fun#edit my book#book writing#notes#notes goal
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wacky behavior from Logan who did uppies with Wade in the Void as he's asking where the hell were they without knowing if Wade could survive a direct stab first
#did logan see wade was a yapper and decided 'thats not the mouth of a normal human being'#and proceeded to bury all six of his claws into wade's flesh#“WHERE THE HELL ARE WE 😡”#LOGAN. HE'S GOING TO SPIT BLOOD IN THE MIDDLE OF HIS ANSWER. PUT HIM DOWN.#YOU WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND HIM IF HE'S DYING AS HE SAYS IT NOW WILL YOU. PUT THE DEADPOOL DOWN.#BAD LOGAN#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool#wade wilson#wolverine#logan howlett#poolverine#deadpool 3#deadclaws#deadpool 2024#deadpool vs wolverine#SPAY LOGAN#not wade going “I dont know 🤨 looks kinda mad maxy 👀 but that would be IP infringement right 🤔”#NO mention that he cares or acknowledges Logan's claws#like ok queers
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in a n o t h e r life
#criminal minds#criminalmindsedit#criminal minds evolution#cmevolutionedit#cmverse#cmverseedit#emily prentiss#emilyprentissedit#mine#edit#*#otp: you are who you pretend to be#internal*#I'M DOING GREAT THANKS FOR ASKING#wednesday night i was complaining that they don't mention emily being a spy enough and then i got this the next day BLESS#(now let her speak other languages!!! it's been years and i'm dying here)#sorry that i'm still this obsessed with the lauren storyline but i am and those eps look SO GOOD giffed (AND DIMPLESSSS)#(making the cm evolution gifs look even worse in comparison i am BEGGING you guys to shoot above pitch black)#ALSO it makes sense that tara (and luke i assume) doesn't know about her time in the task force#(it's not like emily would bring it up it's bad enough that the rest of her family knows about doyle)#but i am !!!! about her not and need tara finding out please 👀
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ventnkinda
i 🫶🏽 havin dreams and wakin up thinking im destined to die the next day or the next week wnd being fine with it
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In one of your comics, you show the drones drinking coolant as if it's some form of alcohol. Wouldn't the presence of this coolant kind of negate the solver drones need for oil? Or does this coolant not work with their system?
it def helps, and I’m kinda treating the drones like they were made to reflect human anatomy. so while the coolant will help with overheating in small doses, it doesn’t get processed through their system correctly in large doses. it makes them extremely sluggish and their processes are slowed for a period of time -like being inebriated.
For the DD’s, at least in my AU, I have them chockablock full of healing nanites/anti nanite acid (in their spit) so their bodies repair incredibly fast, it eats away at anything that’s not oil in their system. They’re essentially heavy weights LOL.
#Thad rolls in a barrel of something he concocted called ‘liquid death’ and it knocks the DD’s on their asses#none of the WD’s can drink it though LMFAOO#murder drones#drone tessa au#drone!tessa#dagoi au#dying and getting over it#alcohol mention#alcohol cw
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I always wondered why Katniss factored marriage and children into the equation when it came to reciprocating Peeta’s feelings for her. It’s a rather large leap, especially when Peeta himself never expresses wanting children at any point in the story. He uses children as a tool to persuade Katniss and the Capital to save her life, but the only time we see him express any desire/feelings of having one of his own is when he’s crying after the baby bomb. But we never hear his real thoughts.
But you wanna know who does express wanting children? Gale.
It’s one of the first thing he mentions in chapter one. And it pisses her off so much.
(I also want to add that Gale reframes/establishes the dynamic of Katniss and him caring for their siblings from something that is sibling-sibling to parent-sibling. And he is not wrong. Katniss doesn’t refute him. Both Katniss and Gale are surrogate parents to their siblings. Which is also why Katniss love and affection of Prim, is not just sisterly. I’ve seen people say Katniss is only sisterly to Prim- but she’s not. She’s parentified their relationship to the point she subconsciously see Prim as her child, which makes this a tragedy because she’ll loose her first child no matter what she does by the end of the story.)
But Gale’s phrasing here elevates himself as a potential suitor to Katniss by placing them both as the parental roles to these children. (Which irritates her a lot ). Which is why she brings the topic up with her relationship with Peeta. Because she’s subconsciously aware of Gale’s efforts and knows it will be a point of contention between them. It hangs over her head in a way.
With Gale, children are extra mouths to feed. (But Gale will do fine. He can work. He can hunt.) It’s all framed with calculated survival in mind. But it’s also not something she had planned in the future at any point.
But Peeta’s children? Oh they deserve to be born because Peeta deserves to be a father. He would be such a good father. They deserve to exist in a world where they can be safe and happy. (Even if it’s not with her.)
This is also why I think she subconsciously sees Peeta’s baby as her own. And I don’t think of it as a cruel/heartless thing, it’s just you’d be more protective of your own child compared to someone else’s. Katniss sees Gale as a reliable person who’s equipped to look after a kid. She doesn’t express the same kind of maternal instinct/yearning for the Baby Hawthrone’s safety as she does with the idea of Baby Mellark, because she doesn’t think of Gale’s child as her own. She never hopes for a better future for them, but she does with Peeta because he and that baby gives her hope. And she loves him that much.
#I’m just rambling#sorry if it’s obvious from the get-go#but I just realized the whole Baby+marriage and Peeta is Katniss dragging her issues with Gale into her relationship with Peeta 🤣#I don’t want to be mean#but Katniss does not give a shit about Gale being a father#she’s all like- yeah go find a partner#but I still want my hunting buddy#but Peeta???#he should be a father (says nothing about finding another woman) and his baby deserves safety#she also doesn’t mention jealous with Peeta#but does with Gale (I wouldn’t be jealous. but me hunting partner…)#which yeah#she plans on dying#but she also blocks out the topic of another woman completely#because I think it would make her sad/jealous#everlark#katniss everdeen#peeta mellark#thg#the hunger games#not tagging Gale lmao
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gary’s twin sister, nadine!!
i’m a sucker for the bonnie & neddy episode :’)
#stravacious#i imagine gary dyed his hair pink bc it’s her favorite and then she wanted it done too#they’d interact with each other a bit more in this world#in at canon bonnie kinda just locks him in a basement bc that’s all she can do but like. nadine needs to eat#i picture it more like he is her only safe person#she freaks out about other people so gary doesn’t bring anyone over#she might be a tablet girlie#sorry if this is too ‘miku binder jefferson’ to ppl out of the at canon loop#their gum lullaby is just some rlly cute song their mom used to sing before she died#in my last at post i mentioned that they lived w their shitty aunt georgia (uncle gumbald) before gary moved them out#maybe she’s the reason nadine hates other ppl so much#adventure time#fionna and cake#gary prince
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DATV explaining the 'Regret Prison'
A REGRET PRISON IS STUPID AND I'M TIRED OF PRETENDING THAT ITS NOT
TL;DR: a prison can serve as a metaphor but it shouldn't be entirely comprised of a metaphor.
From what I understood from what the game gave us: Solas has made a new prison to move the God's too - since bringing down the veil would free them from the Black City. This new prison is separate(?) from the fade or so far removed/contained that bringing down the veil would not compromise it...apparently. We interrupt his ritual, Solas gets sucked into the new prison he made, and the elven gods are free.
When Rook gets kicked into the fade they're physically there - which means it's a physical place in the fade, like how it was a mixture of physical/thought when we entered it in DAI. Which makes sense - the gods are real and living beings, they need to be in a place, there must be some aspect of physicality to it.
Alright, cool, it's a Black City 2.0 - I assume it's better defended to prevent people breaking in/out again?
NOPE.
We get there and it's a 'regret prison'?? It's tied to the regrets of those within it? Composed of regrets??? Solas had to wait for the right moment for Rook to be sufficiently 'full of regret' that they could switch places?
So is the prison tied to Solas's regrets? If so, how can Rook escape? The prison seems to work around the idea that it relies on the regrets of the person it's holding to work - which is how/why Rook was able to be trapped and later free themselves (along with whatever remains of the team apparently being able to do something on their end, not that we hear about it).
WHICH IS STUPID!
Are you telling me the prison intended to hold to megalomaniac elven gods was going to imprison them based on their own regrets? Is Solas assuming that Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain are as self-pitying as he is? They'd break out quicker than Rook did! He made a time out corner for the elven gods to sit in and gave them an out if they reflected on their emotions/regrets or decided that they don't regret what they did. Elgar'nan, a spirit of tyranny, is not going to 'regret' his actions - he is going to justify them by telling himself and others that he knows what's best.
We can come across some of Solas's regrets in the prison if you run around a bit and explore:
Remnant of Failure - talking about the orb from Inquisition.
Remnant of Parting - talking about Mythal
Remnant of Reflection - more vague, talking about the Titans I believe.
So maybe he altered it - maybe he intended the prison to be 'locked' with his own regrets because after a millennia of having a pity party he still can't bring himself to self-reflect and look to the future. But what if Solas died? Or if his guilt lessened - would it diminish the strength of the regret prison?
We already have pre-established lore (though DATV has shown they don't really give a crap tbh) that once the being that has claimed/altered an area of the fade is slain, it's influence diminishes both in and outside of the fade. So if the prison was tied to his regrets then it would require Solas to basically live forever to keep it stable - especially if he brought down the veil and removed the one barrier that kept the world and the fade apart.
Rook and Solas needed some assistance to exit - but it doesn't seem like it was much! Solas used his dagger and Rook just...got out through a fade tear? This is Solas's 'more secure' second prison? It has a worse track record than the Black City! If Rook - who is not an elven god - managed to escape the regret prison what is to stop anyone else from breaking in and out of the prison?
And what did Solas intend to do with the blight - the bulk of which is apparently in the black city?? If bringing down the Veil would free the gods in the black city doesn't that mean that the blight would also be released?! Did he have a plan? Why does he go fully ahead with bringing down the veil at the end if the black city is still there and filled with blight?!
I get it: the 'regret prison' is a metaphor for how Solas holds onto the past and how Rook can move past their regrets and grow. He's trapped by the past - it's a prison. Cool. But this prison is supposed to by a physical place to contain the gods - not just to solely contain Solas. The mission is literally called 'A Cage for Gods'.
The Black City is an actual place that's so far out of reach of anywhere else in the fade that no mage can ever reach it while in dreams - let alone physically, which was only done once and took tremendous effort/blood sacrifices. It made sense - it was cool to see floating in the sky in DAO!
Though it's not said specifically, it's strongly implied that Arlathan is the Black City. You can see in the concept art that floating elven city is exactly the same as the black city in DAO! It's this foreboding thing just lurking in the sky - a constant reminder of the sin that led to the horrors of the blights and darkspawn. A real place with lore and history that also serves as a metaphor for the hubris and destruction of those who call themselves gods and act as tyrants -> for both the evanuris and the magisters.
I WANT TO UNDERSTAND THIS BIOWARE!
WHAT IS THIS KINGDOM HEARTS NONSENSE???!!
#we'll need Mickey and Donald to break us out of this one#this screams 'this sounds so cool lets put it in' and not 'how can we do something cool that works with the world we've established'#“it's metaphorical-” it can be metaphorical and make sense!!!#trying to invoke 'emotion' with that black and white tone and only succeeded in getting me to feel pure confusion and rage#THE FADE IS GREEN TINTED - THE LAST GAME WAS LITERALLY COLOUR THEMED AFTER IT#i'm passionate about the fade being green the same way i'm passionate about Aurora's dress being blue and Cinderella's being silver#solas's more secure second prison literally has a worse track record than the black city - why is he so dumb???#I regretted no choices in datv besides the decision to actually play this game lmao#if the game actually acknowledged that Rook's actions led to thousands of people dying maybe I'd feel something in the regret prison#no mention of treviso/ minrathous/ or southern thedas??#the team all knew the risks of what they were doing! they volunteered/made their own choices - ME2 did this so much better#played as an elf so I didn't even feel bad when Harding died because of the weird elf specific dialogue she had#I'm not sorry for the titans/what Solas did - I wasn't even there! Doesn't justify the shit that happened to the elves after either!#this game made me apathetic to LACE HARDING and i loved her in Inquisition#i'm sorry but I had more regret for choosing to speak mean to Merrill once than anything I did in this game#currently writing about the magisters sidereal in my lore post and I needed to blurt this out because its so stupid#typed out the word 'regret' so much is has no meaning in my head anymore lmao#datv critical#datv spoilers#bioware critical#dragon age the veilguard#veilguard critical
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I'd like to take a moment to point out to detractors of ships involving Laios who feel that "Laios wouldn't take any interest in people!" that he'd hyperfixated on Shuro so badly it was ruining the man's life lmao
#dungeon meshi#dunmesh spoilers#not even discounting that he'd be aroace or anything just that laios is perfectly capable of taking an interest in people#labru#this one's for labru nation#laios stating the reason that (alongside with having a genuine interest in shuro's home)#he was so excited because he thought shuro considered him a friend#could you even IMAGINE how he'd be with a person who went c o m p l e t e l y out of his way to be his friend on purpose#venturing into the dungeon putting himself in danger dying over and over again just to get close to him and his party#can you#i can#none of this even mentioning how the series ends with laios developing a genuine desire to take a bigger interest in humans#but i wont hold that against the anime onlys#side note it just kills me how laios (who is so painfully trusting of people) to immediately think kabru is lying to him here#god#top 10 characters who absolutely rot my brain
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