#mental health saga

[dengswei]

i get it now why there are service dogs for anxiety/mental health

[wildweirdly]

Psychosis sucks and I feel like every once in a while it comes for me again and then next thing I know I’m having to talk myself out of doomsday cult mentality. It is SO fun and I love it!!! 🥰🔥👎

[vampiresawakenedmycravings]

Can you write Jasper Hale x Fem!Reader for overstimulation, like him using his powers to heighten her pleasure

Can do

528 words

Smut, overstimulation, powers, brat

Jasper watched as y/n woke up next to him, her h/c hair tangled in her face.

“Good morning love” he senses her joy and carefully moves her hair out of her face.

She smiles, her big e/c eyes warming his frozen cold heart. “good morning jasper”

“how are you feeling my love?” That makes her giggle

“You already know how I feel silly”

“Yes, but I’d like to hear you say it.”

She smiles again love for him showing on her face

“I’m happy, and in love”

He feigns innocence

“Now who’s got you’re heart all in a knot?” He smiles

She hums

“Oh, he’s the most wonderful man, he is so sweet. And handsome, and I swear he can tell how I feel” she kisses his neck softly “And did I mention how hot he is?”

He gasps at her boldness

“Love, you’re emotions are so strong,”

She continues to kiss him only stopping to say “and? What am I feeling?”

“Pleasure, and love” He grabs her hands before she realizes “I don’t think you understand what you’re starting y/n” he says sternly

“Please do tell,” she says sarcastically.

“Don’t be a bad girl, or I’ll have to punish you. You know how I do hate punishing you,”

she doesn’t stop

“And what will you do to punish me? Spanking is getting quite tiring.” She smirks

“You’ll see,” Jasper pulls off her underwear with his teeth. She gasps feeling his cold tongue go inside her. He uses his teeth to lightly pull on her clit.

“Fuck jasper,” she moans knowing he’s heightening her feelings with his power

“You like this my dear?”

“You’re gonna make me cum,” the pleasure takes her body over and she grabs his head pushing it deeper into her.

He moves his tongue faster inside of her till she cums on him. He slowly gets up reaching for a vibrator on the nightstand.

“Oh no,” she gasps, she had always heard of people being overstimulated by there partners, but she never thought she’d see the day when jasper was gonna do it

“Are pigs flying?” She laughs nervously.

“Hm?” He asks

“Never mind”

“Alright”

she hears the vibrator be turned on, she watches as jasper licks it to make it wet.

“You sure I can’t just pleasure you jasper?”

“You were a bad girl, this is you’re punishment, my love”

“Oh fuck me,” she moans out as she feels the vibrator enter her.

“In due time, y/n.”

Y/ns moans echo throughout the room, sounding like a sweet melody in jaspers ears.

After 20 minutes jasper had made her cum 5 times

“Jasper please no more,” she gasps for breath “or at least stop heightening my fe-“ she moans loudly coming a sixth time

“Cum for me one more time, my love”

the vibrations go up and y/n opens her legs farther. She moves jasper’s fingers to her clit. A couple seconds later she cums again. The vibrations stop finally letting her breathe.

“Omg Jasper, that felt so good,”

[geminiwierdo]

My mind

[ineffectualdemon]

When you connect that something you love about your favourite fictional characters is a trait or emotion you were punished for or denied of as a child

[the-labyrinth-of-me]

It will hurt. But I will fight.

[themythecho]

Suicide Depictions in EPIC: The Musical (An essay I wrote in 30 minutes after the wisdom saga came out because I'm neurodivergent and write essays for fun)

(TRIGGER WARNING/SPOILER WARNING FOR: Self-Ham, Death, Suicide, all the EPIC sagas, but mainly the wisdom saga)

It is no question that in recent years, the media we consume has been covering darker and vulnerable topics. One prime example of this EPIC: The Musical. This musical is loosely based on the Odyssey as it follows Odysseus and his twenty year voyage to return to his wife; Penelope, his son; Telemachus, and his kingdom; Ithaca, after the Trojan War.

The overall recurring value in the musical is “Ruthlessness is Mercy upon ourselves” stated by director and lead vocalist of the show: Jorge (Jay) Rivera-Herrans. When Odysseus is faced with the decision to kill an infant boy that would later raise tyranny in all his path, the audience first hears the lines “When does a man become a monster”, which will return in later songs as well.

Those particular lyrics are letting the listener know of the man verses self conflicts Odysseus faces through the musical. Later on, in the Ocean saga, Odysseus hears this line again when part of his crew is murdered by Poseidon. These lines appear in three more sagas after this of the current sagas released: The Underworld Saga, The Thunder Saga, and The Wisdom Saga. Each of these instances, Odysseus is faced with the knowledge of the soldiers who died, or will die under his command.

The Wisdom Saga is the most notable Occurrence of this fact. Odysseus is standing at the edge of a cliff on Ogygia; Calypso’s island. Calypso calls out to Odysseus to rethink things, telling him she’ll greet him with Open Arms. This triggers Odysseus to remember the wise words of his friend; Polites, who died almost a decade before these events. He hears his voice telling him to “Greet the world with open arms”, but as those words flood his mind, other quotes from various characters in different spots of the musical overwhelm his thoughts.

Odysseus yells out to the empty ocean that “All I hear are screams”, which is a nod to the earlier saga; The Underworld Saga. He continues to yell this out, as a desperate attempt to find some sign, some will to live. This is when Odysseus calls out to his last resort, his old friend: Athena. The song ends here, which leaves the audience with pain and even confusion.

So why is this depiction of suicidal idealation, such a great representation of such thoughts? To start out, Odysseus’s suicidal thoughts are not a surprise to the fans of EPIC at all. Odysseus’s thoughts of self-harm have festered in him from the beginning, starting with killing an infant, as he states “I’d rather bleed for you!” in response to being asked to kill the son of Hector. This example is definite proof, that Odysseus had suicidal idealation for quite some time, and each traumatic event latched onto that fact until his breaking point

The other point of why this is such an interesting take on suicidal thoughts, is the reference to him having screams play back in his mind. As a general quirk to the musical, it uses repetitive lyrics and tones for certain characters, which makes them easily recognizable by these lines. The repetition of melodies is seen all throughout the musical, but Jorge Rivera-Herrans uses this to his advantage while writing these depressing train of thoughts. Having urges, almost like someone is telling you to act upon something is not irregular among Suicidal People, and Jorge is aware of this by the likes of the musical. He uses this trait to relate it to Odysseus, while still staying loyal to the original musical and the overall theme of it.

All in all, Jorge Rivera-Herrans has depicted how and why Odysseus faces such thoughts in a delicate and sensitive manner that can really speak to the listener. These words are able to showcase how Odysseus’s trials and tribulations through his journey did not just leave physical scars, but emotional scars as well. This can leave the audience to infer of Odysseus’s conquering his suicidal thoughts, leading him back to his home. This can also have the audience question if he will be able to defeat his thoughts in the first place, having him succumb to it.

[moonlitdark]

Interview: JAMIE CAMPBELL BOWER talks Stranger Things, working with Kevin Costner, Game Of Thrones and more.

[quasonn]

Sometimes I find myself in agreement with the sentiments shared by Miyazaki on the state of the manga and anime industry, it's regressive filth without any intention of critique, but once in a while you receive something decade defining like Vinland, I read it before it came as an anime and I never expected it to turn into one, but I guess the landscape has changed and something like Vinland finds an audience among a larger crowd shows growth in the art we consumed and hopefully il see the end of mediocre isekai stories with regressive characters coming out every 5 days.

[wings-dings-and-iggyfings]

me trying to find the motivation to get through a day like:

[bones-of-a-rabbit]

pov ur nervous abt ur new job but feel a little better when u think ur coworkers will be nice and friendly but then they aren’t and it sends u on a downward spiral bc ur just quirky like that

A retelling of ‘oh my god. You hated me. You’ve hated me this whole time.’, taken in a DIFFERENT mental-illnesses-go-brrr direction! Continued below the cut,

Haha yikessss! That’s cringy! I’m surprised you’ve scrolled down this far! Mostly I’ve been hoping people would see the first bit of this post and go ‘oh hell nah’ and pretend like it didn’t just plague their innocent mind with the knowledge that self insert cringe of this level still exists! So congrats! I’ve committed many crimes and you’re here to witness them

To answer some question you might have:

Who is that???: SURPRISE IT’S NOT VANNY!!! that is Babbit! Or Rabbit, or Bones, whichever you prefer. It’s a self insert of me!

Why are they a rabbit one second then a person the next?? Are those even supposed to be the same character??: Yes, they are the same person, just drawn in different ways! Why they change is a little more difficult to explain bc it,, depends, honestly sjdhdjd. A lot of the time, the rabbit is like,, an inner version, the more honest and vulnerable version of Rabbit, the ‘you’ that YOU see in your own mind. The regular human version is, normally, what the world sees, the actual, physical person that is Rabbit.

But why tho: Idk I just like weird stupid metaphors and weird wonky character designs!

What’s happening??: Rabbit has a job at the daycare! Rabbit is an anxious, stressed out and socially inept person who worries a lot about what other people think! Sun and Moon dislike them, bc this was inspired by some of those AUs where Sun and Moon are just mean for no good reason LMAO. Rabbit is crushed by this bc they thought Sun and Moon, who are PROGRAMMED and DESIGNED to be likeable and friendly and caring, would HAVE to like them!! It’s their job! It’s what they’re supposed to do! It’s what they’re built for: to like people and to be liked by people! To be disliked by them means there is something so fundamentally and ineffably wrong with them that it breaks the laws of physics- at least in Rabbit’s mind. Before they could disregard everyone who disliked them as people being people and them just having a disliked personality! But to be disliked by something designed to like people? Holy mothballs, bat man, you must be REAL KINDS of fucked up!

They think there is something so wrong with them that even the ones who like everyone do not like them, and it is THEIR FAULT that they are disliked, not anyone else’s- not even Sun and Moon’s. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. And it hurts more when Sun and Moon fake being kind and friendly under a heavy layer of passive aggression. So, at the end of their rope and believing there is nothing that can be done to help them or fix their situation, they start to loathe Sun and Moon and start to lash out at them whenever feeling especially slighted. Is this reasonable? No! Does it make them feel better? Absolutely not!!! Do Sun and Moon deserve it??? No not really!!! And the farther it goes the more Rabbit let’s themselves sink into being as bitter and hurtful as they always tried so hard not to be. And it’s not anyone’s job to fix them but theirselves. But right now, for the first time in a long time, they really don’t want to.

Does Rabbit actually just need a hug and a warm blanket???? Idk probably!!!!

This is a self insert????: Yup!

So this is based off you??: Unfortunately!

Does that mean-: haha!!!!!!!!! Don’t worry about it!!!!!! :) Next question!

Most people’s fantasies are about their faves liking them, yknow: Haha yeah!

Why did you even make this: I’m going to pretend like I’m not just completely nuts and say, it helps me process my feelings and also ✨catharsis✨

Do you want to talk: HAHA no definitely not this is embarrassing enough as is!!!!!!

U good?: Yes actually! Just weird! Sorry sjdgdjshdnvdndbdhd

Why are you sharing this: idk tbh maybe validation on some weird fucked up level lmao

Anyway thank u for ur time and I apologize for the death of so many of ur brain cells. Idk why ur still here but holy shit man idk if I should be proud of u or scared of u. I’m mentally giving u a gold ribbon tho congrats on,, reading this abomination of a post ig

[infinity-brain]

[wildweirdly]

Can’t sleep again so I’m laying on my kitchen floor listening to floppy drive music

[geminiwierdo]

No words needed

[mymultiverse00]

Left Behind

This is my first ever Twilight story. I hope you like it!

There are no hiding spots for humans in Volterra Castle, especially when considering its residents. Oh, I can find a dark corner to huddle in for a little while or even go outside to bask in the blazing hot sunshine, but no matter where I go, someone will always find me. They follow my voice, or my scent, or the sound of my wheelchair on the ancient stone floors, and like magic, any hope I had for some blissful solitude is completely shattered. But today is different. Today there are visitors in the castle from far away covens, and suddenly, no one around me can spare me a second glance, not even my mate. That part hurts the most.

I met my mate only six months ago while working in town at the old Volterra library. At the time, I had no real home, no living family, and really, no hope. I was barely eking out a living, limited by both my mobility and my inability to speak the local language. I was depressed and crippled by low self-esteem and severe anxiety. I barely had the will to go on, but then I met Marcus, and everything changed.

Every day for three months the tall, somber man visited me at the library, and slowly the two of us developed a relationship that blossomed into love. He confessed his feelings and his secret one rainy night in my tiny apartment and offered me a future I couldn’t possibly turn down. He moved me into his home and introduced me to his family, and never once was my disability an issue for him. In fact, he went out of his way to make things easier for me. Every day he told me he loved me, and brick by brick, he helped me rebuild my self-confidence and push the depression away.

As soon as I agreed to move in, Marcus started renovating and redecorating his rooms, adding low-profile furniture and other accessible fixtures. He remodeled the bathroom completely, adding grab bars and a roll-in shower with a sturdy teakwood bench across the back wall. He brought in a new bed that had the ability to be raised and lowered at will, along with a mountain of pillows designed to take pressure off my back, hips, and knees, and never once complained about his own discomfort.

He also considered my other human needs, expanding doorways and lowering work surfaces, creating unobstructed pathways to the garden and conservatory, and even convincing Aro to hire a full-time chef to cook my meals. He made it very clear that he wanted to make the remainder of my human life as simple as possible and would stop at nothing to make me happy.

There was only one thing he couldn’t change, however, and I have a hard time holding it against him: the stairs. Volterra Castle is full of ancient stone staircases everywhere you look. Stairs going up to Athenadora and Sulpicia’s rooms; stairs going down to the kitchen and the activity room for the lower guard; stairs keeping me firmly planted on the first floor of the castle at all times.

Normally, stairs are not a huge issue. Marcus took great delight in lifting me up into his strong arms in order to ferry me anywhere I wanted to go. He would loop my arms securely around his neck and pick me up like a bride, sneaking kisses and snuggles all along the way. I would giggle girlishly at his roguish behavior, and he would smile, and maybe we would be late to our destination if we ever made it at all. Today, however, the stairs won.

——————

The morning had been a busy one, with everyone buzzing around the castle, preparing for the arrival of some very important guests. Marcus and his brothers were holding a summit of sorts, and covens from all over Europe would be arriving at noon for two days of festivities. There would be a grand reception this afternoon and evening, and after the meetings ended tomorrow, there would be a lavish ball. This was the first time I would be introduced to such a large group as Marcus’s mate, so I was extremely nervous, but my love had assured me that I would be welcomed by all.

Or at least I would have been, had I been in the throne room with the rest of the group. Somehow, in all the excitement of handshaking and backslapping during the arrival of our guests, everyone forgot about the half dozen steps required to enter the gathering hall, subsequently forgetting about me too.

After 45 minutes of rolling back and forth in front of the doors and occasionally speaking Marcus’s name out loud, hoping to catch his attention, I decided to give up. Obviously, he was too busy to miss my presence, as were Aro, Caius, my sisters, or my friends in the guard. My feelings were hurt, undoubtedly, but seeing no other option, I decided to return to my room and wait for someone to realize I was absent.

No one noticed.

Hours went by without a peep. No one came to look for me, and no one brought me dinner either. I couldn’t get to the kitchen myself because of the goddamned stairs, so there was nothing left for me to do but stay exactly where I was, hidden in the furthest corner of my room’s veranda, trying not to be hungry and trying not to sob out loud as I cried. My heart was aching as the heavy feeling of abandonment settled over me, and my old friend, self-loathing, started creeping in. The next several hours were filled with ugly thoughts and horrible sadness, and though I wanted to resist that darkness, it completely overwhelmed me once more.

——————

It was nearly midnight when I finally heard my mate’s frantic voice calling out for me from our shared bedroom.

“Y/N!” Marcus called, a hint of desperation in his tone. “Y/N? Where are you my love?”

“Out here, Marcus,” I replied listlessly, barely raising my voice as I knew he could hear me. I was mentally and physically drained from the emotional upheaval of the day and made no real effort to emerge from my safe little hiding spot. I could hear how upset I had made him, and I was unsure if I could face him just then.

“My darling!” He cried, finally spotting me and speeding quickly to my side. His eyes quickly scanned me for injury. “Where have you been, little one? I couldn’t find you.”

I looked down at my hands as I answered him, too afraid to look into his eyes. “I’ve been here, Marcus. All day.”

“But why, tresoro?” He took my hands in his. “Did you not want to meet our guests? Many of them came here just to see you.” I could tell he was disappointed in me and my heart broke just a little bit more.

“I-I-I… did want to…” I stammered, “But I couldn’t. There was no way for me to get into the throne room, Marcus. I was left behind,” I concluded quietly, blinking back the tears that threatened to fall.

“Left behind?” He questioned.

“Yes.” I paused. “How long, Marcus?” I asked dejectedly.

“How long for what, Y/N? I don’t understand.”

“How long did it take for you to realize I wasn’t there with you, Marcus? 2 hours? 4?”

He closed his eyes as it finally started to sink in. “Y/N, I’m…”

“Disappointed in me?” I whispered. “I understand. I’m sorry, Marcus. I have not been a very good mate to you today, and I have shamed you. I understand why you and the others did not look for me. I have not been an asset to the family.” Tears streamed freely down my face as I tried to apologize for my shortcomings.

“Y/N, no. Please don’t cry.” Marcus begged, crouching down to my level as he tried to comfort me. “It is I who should apologize. It is my duty to look out for you and to protect you. I have failed in that today; I should have remembered you needed help with the steps. There were so many people, and I got caught up….”

“I thought you didn’t want me anymore.” I interrupted with a sob. “No one came for me all day, and I thought I had done something wrong! Maybe I have become too much of a burden on you..”

“Never, amore!” He said with conviction, bending his head low to kiss my hands.

“But it’s true, Marcus! I know it is! Every day you are forced to do things you would never typically do, all because of me,” I said sadly. “You’re the King of Volterra, Marcus! And I have you spending your days babysitting me. You help me in and out of bed; you help me dress; hell, you’ve even had to help me in the shower a time or two! You’re forced to carry me around this castle all day long - and my wheelchair - because I can’t even get myself to the kitchen to feed myself. I’m asking you for too much, and I don’t want you to resent me for it.” My tears were hot and burned my cheeks as they continued to fall. “I’m sorry for disappointing you.”

“Oh, Y/N,” he soothed. “Come here, darling.” He scooped me out of my wheelchair and into his arms, hugging me tightly to his chest. “Y/N, my heart, I love you! More than anything in the world. You are my mate, and I do all of those things you mentioned before because I want to. I am honored that you allow me to help you throughout the day, and you could never be a burden to me. If anyone should be apologizing here, it should be me! I disappointed you today, and I am sincerely sorry for that. I never want you to feel left behind or unwanted again, and I will spend the rest of our eternity making up for my error today. I will also speak to our contractor about adding some wheelchair ramps where we can and an elevator as well. I should have done so long ago.” He wiped my tears away with the sleeve of his robe. “Can you forgive me, sweetheart? I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

I nodded slowly against his chest, taking in deep, ragged breaths in an attempt to calm my feelings. I love him so much that not forgiving him was never really an option for me. After a long time, I spoke to him again.

“Marcus?” I asked quietly. “Do you think things will be different… after you change me?”

He smiled at me, gently moving some stray hair out of my eyes before he spoke. He sighed softly, resting his forehead against my own. “I don’t know for sure, my precious one. We have seen vampire venom heal a number of injuries and ailments in the past, sometimes even snatching someone back from the brink of death, like dear Jane and Alec. Every change is different, darling. I want you to know, however, that no matter what the outcome of yours, Y/N, I will always love you and will work to keep you by my side forever.”

“The world’s first vampire in a wheelchair.” I scoffed. “Some claim to fame.”

“How about ‘Queen of Volterra, Mate of King Marcus’ for a claim to fame?” He suggested, gazing at me adoringly.

“That could work,” I giggled, moving to bring our lips together in a tender kiss. “I’m sorry I let my anxiety get the best of me, Marcus.”

“And I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me, my darling girl. Now, I know it’s late, but we need to get some food for you, and then I believe I can come up with some more… creative ways to apologize to you. Interested?”

“Always.”

The end

[optionalcausality]

Thank goodness for that moment Brennan Lee Mulligan learned that Evan Kelmp's trait of "I'm only valuable if I'm useful" was perceived by others as an intentional choice for the character.

He talked about it afterwards as this moment of realization for him, because he thought that trait was just fundamentally true (like, just how the world works). And having others express their views on it, allowed him to step back and be like, ah, this is a belief that I have about the world rather than just how the world is? Wild!

Because when I tell you that my world got rocked in therapy today, it's an understatement, and my mind immediately went to "BLeeM handled this really well, I am going to use his reaction as a model for how I process this."

(There are not that many positive examples I've seen of someone realizing that a core belief of theirs is just a belief, and doing emotional processing of that in real time, and being open afterward about what they learned.)