#me think abt her name(s) and her existence(s)
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deathstar shippers stop going out of ur way to tell me you hate dominator being a lesbian and that you’re homophobic asf challenge (impossible, apparently)
#(cw: put under a read more for homophobia & transphobia 😬)#LITERALLY went ''lemme say the quiet part out loud'' BRO THIS IS LIKE THE 6TH(????) TIME I'VE HAD SUCH AN ENCOUNTER#except i will say that this is the first time it wasn't unprovoked. i did @ them first to ask why they were leaving replies on my posts-#-saying hater's crush on dominator is creepy bc they 'look like they have an age gap' meanwhile they've liked AND MADE#-comments elsewhere shipping her with men that are way WAY older than her and sometimes visibly so like. hater and her are the same agegroup#so i was like. what is going on here huh??? ANFD THEN THEY JUST SAY THIS SHIT why am i ever surprised anymore lmao#shout out to this person for adding transphobia to their shittiness for Spice ig /s 🙄 eugh...#i should've seen it coming bc they were referencing a page on the woy wiki THAT USES STEVENSON'S CORRECT NAME & PRONOUNDS#AND YET THEY WERE ADAMANT ON USING HIS DEADNAME AND SHE/HER PRONOUNS LIKE.. I SHOULD'VE EXPECTED THIS I SHOULD'VE EXPECTED THIS but still 🤢#i dont ever wanna stop giving ppl the benefit of the doubt but oh my god do These people test me. every time. goes like this Every Single T-#on god only like twice or smthn have i seen [REDACTED] shippers be like.. very decent to me and literally just ignorant#and they were from here and i just ask them to not interact bc it makes me uncomfortable and they're like i dont get it but ofc#and i never see them again#AND THEN EVERY OTHER PERSON WHO IS INTO THIS SHIT I HAVE *EVER* COME ACROSS#FUCKING JUST... JUMPS INTO MY MENTIONS OUT OF NOWHERE. LITERALLY I DONT EVEN?? DO ANYTHING I DONT GO NEAR THEM BRO#THEY FUCKING SNIFF ME OUT OR SOME SHIT FOR HAVING A DNI ON OTHER SITES AND GO#''OH SO YOU THINK I'M WRONG FOR HAVING TO REIMAGINE GAY/LESBIAN CHARACTERS AS STRAIGHT SO I CAN ENJOY THEM?'' LIKE- WTF? YES? IT IS#also i kid you not this is an actual thing someone has gone out of their way to look me up and yell at me over for like an hour straiught#on twitter. it was unhinged. like they were convinced straight ppl are oppressed any time gay characters exist#bc gay characters existing makes them unlikable and unrelatable and unconsumable to straights like damn ok if u feel that way die abt it?#it's just so unhinged like bruh GO AWAY LMAO??? SHUT UP! I DONT CARE LITERALLY JUST KEEP UR FREAK BIGOT SHIT TO URSELF GET OUT#again that specifically doesn't apply to this person who technically WAS @ by me first bc i was like.. hey... hey what's going on here HUH#but oh my god they turn out to be vocally homophobic every single time. i was always hoping i was like...#over generalizing these people as being fucking homophobic just bc 1) the vibes r always like that 2) it's faster to say#BUT OH MY GOD THEY REALLY ARE HOMOPHOBIC AS A WHOLE WHAT THE FUCK I LITERALLY ALWAYS WENT OUT OF THE WAY TO BE LIKE aint no way ahah BUT NO?#BRO???? GET OUT OF HERE THIS SHOW IS NOT FOR YOU Y'ALL ARE CREEPS#THEY FEEL SO EMBOLDED TO SAY THE QUIET PART OUT LOUD EVERY SINGLE TIME WITHOUT PROMPTING. I ALWAYS MAKE FUCKING SURE TO NOT ACCUSE BIGOTRY#AT MOST I'LL JUST BE LIKE yeah so straightwashing is a thing that's homophobic so don't do that IF ANYTHING. I NEVER CALL THE PERSON THAT#AND EVERY TIMEEEE THEY JUST GO MASK OFF WITH ''BTW I DONT LIKE THE GAYS'' I OEIUFKGEJRHGUKJDFS EVERY TIME EVERY TIME WTFFFFF#usually being right about things is epic. not this THIS IS JUST.. GWORLS WHAT HE FUCK
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the way seraphina has changed her name three times already, and is going to change her name one more time in the future, and the way her name symbolizes different chapters of her life, different versions of her. the way self - understanding and self - perception is viewed through one's choosing of their own name.
#'eve' was the only like. truly metaphorical / symbolic name she chose.#'titania' .. well.. hehe#but yeah the name she is going to rename herself as is [ SCRAMBLED NOISES AND OLD HOWLS ]#anyways i say this bc im writing a starter for rio which takes place when she was Eve; and it made#me think abt her name(s) and her existence(s)
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maoe rj8sthe utnro pist
seems to be a popular demand so alright☝️
Welcome to my blog cunts and bitches /lh
My name is Jana, or circe call me either idm
He/she/they like literally any pronouns I could not care nor do I mind
poly, bisexual,
Hashtag apart of @xeme-starx zoo hashtag @garden-of-runar 's bat hashtag i need to make a pronouns page hashtag what else am i?
BIGGEST GREEN APPLE HATER ON THIS BLOCK🗣🗣💯
📷 || 📍 || 🎵 || 🎧 || click for palestine ||
More about me!
Interests: marauders, five nights at freddies, Greek mythology, deranged old stories, gory books or gory shows, cannibalism as a concept/metaphor, murder massacres, true crime, fun facts, outer banks, the hunger games, human rights, politics, music, I'll add when I think of more
Dislikes: uhh lowk idk you guys tell me idk myself
Hates: GREEN FUCKING APPLES. GREEN APPLES
my people <3
@garden-of-runar my platonic partner, my sun, my poet, the melody to my kuromi, the bunny to my fox, the remus/james to my sirius, the loml (/p) ITS RUNAR GUYS RAHHH chaotic but wonderful nonetheless 💞💞💞 meeting them was a pleasure and honor🗣 andandandnad guys you need to check runar out she's a wonderful person to know
@starkissed-mars UGH MARS I LOBE MARS AND I LORV TALKING TO MARS mars is lowkey kinda the evan to my barty, freakiest person I've met, one of my favorite people on here HI MARSSS HI MAZZY☝️☝️, hashtag freakymars who? Hehehehehehrh has some issues but he's so wonderful its insane EVERYONE SAY WE LOEBF TOU MARS❗️
@definitionoffuckup AL❗️❗️ AL ALLEY HI AL al is wonderful and amazing and lowkey kinda scary sometimes with absolute no sense of Internet safety but they're wonderful anyways, also one of my favorites on here I lobe al sosososo much guys you should go check them out
@eef-stars ETHANN our local furry, music taste that lowkey gives me whiplash, I'm sosososososo glad I met him and he really is fucking amazing, lowk older brother core, MAJOR LOVERBOY SYNDROME it's insanely adorable
@kawaiibarty FUCKING MASTER AT WRITING GUYS GO CHECK OUT HIS FICS THEYRE AMAZING, so deranged I'm lowk scared of him/j, JAMES IS SO POOKIE LOWK GUYS also also one of my favorites on here I'm very glad I met him he really is fantastic and that is a FACT, also major loverboy syndrome those two are so gay
@fkufather TWIN WHERE HABE YOU BEEN, guys thats js barty, no joke it's just barty, barty crouch jr who? Lowk twin, his existence strangles me from the inside out/j, your still on my blog ☹️💞
@seekmemystar UGH SO WISE, hashtag itar for president GUYSSSS ITAR IS WONDERFUL ANDANDAND she's a wonderful friend and wonderful person and has a highk amazing humour and she's someone you should 100% check out, B&B GUYS☝️☝️
@hershey-not-the-chocolate-maybe HERSHEYEYEYDHDUDB I LOBE HERSHEY THEYRE WODNERFUL AND THEY MATCH MY MORBIDNESS AND LOWK IF THEY WENT INSANE I WOULDNT BE SUPRISED? anyways guys hershey is amazing
@cheekyboybeth THE CHAPPEL TO MY OLIVIA, guys this is ugh I have no words to describe them I lobe juno sososososksosoksososos much and and I'm sosososososososos glad ive met them and and and they're literally an evan rosier variant idc but juno is lit wonderful and is a great friend and waited wonderful fics
@here-am-i-sitting-in-a-tin-can HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHR GUYS YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH I LOBE TALKING TI THEM, LIKE THE WAY MY FACE LIGHTS UP IN GENUINE JOU WHEENEVER I SEE THEM AROUND, bomb music taste literally amazing, they're amazing in general, everything about them is amazing, literally the embodiment of cool ™
@gasolinehornet NOAH OMG NOAH I CAN LITERALLY NEVER SHUT UP ABT NOAH, most out of pocket person I've met but I love talking with him either way, he's such a sweetheart at heart and he's a wonderful person to know, also has a bomb music taste.
@thestrawberryapologist MARI oh my god guys guysguys please you dont understand mari is the sweetest cutest person alive talking to her literally makes my day- told me she thinks she should have a tw for talking to her but i literally do not believe that she could say the most horrendous thing every and id still go 💞💞💞🎀💞 mari is so wonderful and everything about her is so wonderful and mari quite literally deserves the world (ask me to elaborate and i will) major sister vibes GUYS IDK I JUST LOBE MARI
@insertmatsbloghere UH MAT☝️☝️ GUYS a literal embodiment of sunset, literal embodiment of summer too☝️☝️ I have not known mat for a long long time but am very glad ive met him, he's a very nice person lowk and so fun to talk to and very funny guys lowklowk
@thatoneslytherinnerd bartys brain BUT ALSO SOSOSOSOS MUCH MORE THAN THAT, a wonderful person that I have not known for long but am honored to know nonetheless
@sotiredimbored KUKOOO literally the sweetest person ever ever ever kuko is amazing and kuko deserves the world handed to them on a pretty platter with a bow because you are simply that fantastic. The smell after rain tinged with the color purple and light yellow laced through it sitting in a forest filled with butterflies core.
@the-stars-drowning RORRYYY RAHHHHHHHH LIT SUCH A CUTIE PIE AND SUCH A WONDERFUL PERSON AND A FELIGHT TO BE AROUND AND TALK TO AND DO WHATEVER WITH AND ANYTHING WITH ALSO VERY COOL
@crowofthestars KAIII HELLO tortures me with green apples lowk but is such a fucking vibe. LIKE I WILL NEVER GET OVER IT THIS DUDE IS SUCH A VIBE INTERACTING IEHT KAI IS SUCH A REGRESH EVEN UF WE'RE FUGHTING OVER GREEN APPLES KAI IS AMAZING🗣🗣 we don't interact as much as I'd like and I'd love to interact with kai more lowk BUT THEYRE WONDERFUL NONTHELESS AND HAVE A BOMB TASTE IN BOOKS
TELL ME IF YOU WANNA BE ADDED OR REMOVED PLEASE❗️❗️❗️
Moodboards (will link here)
#Ties and stars☆#<<for goodnight posts#Goldfish#Hashtag freakymars#<<interactions with mars#chaotic gardens of deer and bunnies#<<FOR RUNAR#I'll add more tags as I go#Ugh this took a long time#Intro
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$$60 billion (part 1) • l.s.m.
How did a legendary bounty promised for turning in the wasteland's most infamous outlaw transform into a sick, little inside betting joke amongst your traveling companions? Though you have no idea why they're doing it… you sure as hell don't want that very same gunslinger comrade worth sixty billion double dollars to know anything about it either — but oops — looks like he already does! Damn you and your temper, some unhelpful lip-loosening alcohol, and one no-good, sorry excuse of a preacher you sometimes think of as a friend.
Pairing: outlaw!lee seokmin x fem!reader Genres: eventual smut (minors dni!), trigun!au action!au, apocalyptic/post-apocalyptic!au, space western!au, slight enemies to comrades to ??? !au, angst, fluff, they're dumbasses your honor 🙏 Warnings: swearing, blood, death, gore, guns, injuries, destruction, mentions of knives, weapons, violence, creepy monsters and creatures, ptsd, moral ambiguities, dark topics tbh, smoking, unsettling space western things, slight body horror and hints at altered dna, weird religious cults, mentions of eating/food, alcohol, threats, bets among friends, platonic (but not really) nakedness, reader is operating on a short fuse bc I believe u have to be built different for this universe, their communication is abt to be as poor as the plant life 💀 Seungcheol kinda his own warning imho, biggest apology to chan, and we all love seok sm bc he sings abt total slaughter 🙇🏻♀️ WC: 19.5k of 32.7k | Part 2 | Read on AO3 A/N: this is for the Now that's 90's - A Seventeen collab and loosely based off/inspired by the Trigun anime/manga! You do not need to know it as I manipulated a whole lot of elements for my own narrative but beware of various spoilers if you do go ahead and check out the series after reading!! I feel like the boys may seem ooc but I had a lot of fun putting this together 😌 Thank you Summer and Isa for hosting this collab and your utmost patience in me finally writing my piece! I hope everyone enjoys this and please check out the other writers in this amazing collab ❤️let me know your thoughts and feel free to ask any questions regarding this au's intricacies!!
Everyone wanted Lee Seokmin.
The cities' great militaries. Bounty hunters. Bandits on the roads. Criminals escaping death row. Prowling pirate gangs. His twin brother. You.
Though you reckoned your "want" for him was a bit… different from others. Well, at least you hope so, goddamn it.
You shiver.
At first, you wanted him just like the mass majority would one day as well — dead. The deed swiftly carried out with a silver pistol aimed at his temple.
Besides, your blood-thirst began before the destruction of July. Unlike most, who angrily shake their fists at the gaping crater on the fifth moon in the spirit of pure vengeance. Yes, the tragic incident of the great city that upped the bounty dangling over his head like a noose to a sixty billion double dollars reward. But Little Ivywood was the first of many places that would end up reduced to ruins after Lee Seokmin set foot there.
Wiped off the map. Wiped from history. Wiped from existence. But never forgotten. Especially not by the small town's only known survivor — you.
Your earliest memories contain little about the events that led up to being left on the doorstep of Little Ivywood's unofficial orphanage. How could they when you were just a baby? One swaddled in a ratty cloth weighted down by a rusted pistol. There was just one simple hint to your past — scribbled nearly illegible on a torn piece of paper dotted with blood — and could only be what the nuns had to assume was your name.
At least that's how Sister Meryl relayed the tale whenever asked, her hands clasped tightly together in praise and gratitude to the Saint that delivered you to them unharmed. The irony, considering Sister Lucia always looks like she'll faint just like the day she opened the convent's side door. It wasn't an easy sight to see or recall, the image of a wailing infant mouthing on the empty muzzle of a gun.
Neither versions of your origin story could be that far off thanks to the scar marring your left hand and the gun held tightly in your right. You've had both for as long as you can remember. And as you grew and changed, so did they.
The scar shrunk and faded through the years, seemingly forgotten amongst a myriad of other markings littered across your skin. Over time, the pistol's rusted parts were repaired or replaced and soon, its shine and character returned. Restored to its former glory while forging a new beginning ahead with a different owner.
But there were two things that stayed constant throughout your years at the orphanage. The first was your birth name. Not even the nuns, who generally loved bestowing scriptural monikers as if they were granting rich titles to unnamed orphans, tried to change yours. The second was a person who you still refuse to call by his baptismal name — Chan.
He helped you, became an assistant of sorts. Originally just some snot-nosed, beanpole of a fellow orphan you didn't really pay much attention to. A scared kid who cried way too loudly even after you'd even taken the time to demonstrate that the gun was safe after he'd been the one continuously pestering to see it. Very much to Sister Constance's chagrin, since it all went down in the middle of confessional time.
But curiosity eventually overturned the initial fear.
Lucky, because by acquiring bravery, Chan could discover his innate talent for gunsmithing. Lanky, noodle arms transformed into well-formed, sinewy muscles. The soft baby skin of his hands roughened with callouses as he whittled away near the convent's underground furnace. He'd spend hours down there, returning with sweat, grime, and charcoal smudged all over his skin after melting together the random metal objects found by digging beneath the basement's unfinished floor.
The Sisters disliked dirt and grime all over the children and tracked through the doors. But it was hard to keep clean out in the middle of a sandy desert. Complaints dwindled thanks to the fellow orphans who would stop their mischief to watch Chan work. And as time passed, his shoulders broadened further, his voice began to deepen, his dark hair grew longer, and those brown eyes started to sparkle with something different from simple, fleeting passion — it was a dream.
The excitable boy would tell you all about it under the stars. Late into the nights when you searched for what had to be remnants of Earthen materials from the Big Fall, he'd chatter on and on.
"Once we're actual adults," — free from the guardianship requirement provided from the orphanage — "we're gonna leave Lil Ivywood behind and explore the great wastelands of Gunsmoke!"
You snort at the ridiculousness of such an idea. "And how do you think we'll survive?"
"Easy-peasy, I'm gonna build a bunch of guns and we're gonna end up so rich. And famous!"
"Yeah, sure. Throw a couple double dollars at the worms, I'm sure they'll let us pass with no problem."
Not one to be deterred by your eternal sarcasm, Chan shakes his head."Nah, that's where you come in. Didn't think I'd let you freeload, right?"
He stands and stretches both of his arms straight out, the ones your roommate had started to gush over. Hands clasped together like Sister Meryl's always do before prayer time and then extending both pointer fingers into a mock handgun, out into the distant sand dunes one rarely dares to stray.
"You gotta be a sharpshooter to not let my hard work go to waste!"
You lazily take aim next to him, handling the freshly restored pistol with uncharacteristic gentleness. While it might officially be yours, it's also Chan's baby.
"Mm-hm, me and my killer skills."
And then you both dissolve into laughter.
It was such a pipe dream and yet; it didn't seem utterly impossible. There were little moments you let yourself imagine it, too — just until the suns peep their heads above the horizon. There was no way you could defend yourself — let alone another person — from the dangers of the desert or it would've been something you'd attempted years ago.
But when Chan spoke of his plans under the glow of the orbiting full moons, confidently mapping an adventure through an area he's never been to or seen before, and dreamed — he easily pulled you under his spell too. It was contagious, exciting, addicting, and most of all — it could really be… possible.
An armory of grade-A weapons. The bank account overflowing with double dollars. Endless boxes of bullets and the refined skills to shoot them; you were the force to be reckoned with and a protector of those who couldn't do it for themselves.
"Do you think… we could really succeed?" you ask one night, running a finger along the familiar engravings on your gun's grip panel.
Chan's grin was as shiny as the circular metal shell he was carving into. You refuse to look his way because of how infectious it could be. Plus, the main reason it was so stinking bright was due to this being the first time you verbally entertained his ideas.
"Oh-ho-ho, doubt my capabilities?"
"Obviously."
If offended — he was not — by the instant agreement, there was no sign of it. Instead, he focused back onto his handicraft, knowing you would eventually spill your true thoughts if he was patient.
There was no rush tonight after all. A star-filled expanse of black blanketed across the sky — one he hoped would never change to blue.
"More like… it's just going to be so risky!"
"And that's why you'll be the —"
"But I've never even held a gun before!" You spot Chan pointedly direct the corner of his gaze to where your hands rest, causing you to flinch them away from the weapon and wave around haphazardly as your cheeks heat. "I mean, like, to shoot! Sister Lucia always says it'd be too dangerous."
"Sister Lucia thinks water that doesn't flow directly out of the holy grail is dangerous."
"Technically, that's true."
"Oh god, she's got you thinkin' the same, too!"
"But she'd probably rather swear by the Saint than ever let me get any bullets…" The thought alone of the devout nun saying the Savior's name in vain makes both of you smirk but yours falls just as quick as it came. "And we're going to need those if we ever want to leave Little Ivywood."
"Well —"
"And I… I'd have to kill things! People, too. I don't know if I can do that, I —"
" — Think fast!"
It's his turn to interrupt, chipper voice ever optimistic as he tosses the finished trinket your way. Thankfully, your reflexes work fast enough to catch it nimbly in time. The oval is hot to the touch after hovering over searing flames and despite its small size, weighs down your right palm as you glance over its etchings.
Satisfied, Chan takes that as his cue to walk toward the nook that shields you from the roaring heat of the furnace. Squatting down so he's eye-level with your knees, he brushes back his tangled mess of hair with one hand and taps knowingly at the barrel of the pistol with the other.
"There's no reason to kill anyone or anything."
"But this can hurt people… I could hurt people."
"You've had this ever since you were a baby and never harmed anyone with it."
"It's… it's never been loaded or…"
"Doesn't need to be. If you smacked someone with it, they'd surely feel that hit." He snickers, tone bordering on the edge of cockiness. "I would know, considering the sturdy and valuable materials used for repairs."
You roll your eyes and mutter, "Show-off," but it lacks true malice behind it.
"And even so," Chan takes one of his hands and pats the back of your free one, unintentionally right over the spot where your scar lies. "You've hurt no one before. Not even me, who annoys you the most!"
"About time you finally realized how merciful I am."
He says your name in earnest, remaining uncharacteristically serious and lays your intertwined hands on top of the gun before squeezing tightly. "Both this and you don't have to kill a single thing or person — ever — if that's not what you want to do. You can aim for non-vital points, shoot up in the air… Bullets or no bullets, just the sight of a weapon alone can be enough of a deterrent for most."
Chewing hesitantly on your lower lip, you let his words sink in and he continues.
"The fact you're aware of the hundreds of risks when handling a weapon like this means you'll be even more cautious when using it. I trust you, so trust in yourself."
Warmth spreads from your interlocked hands and through your entire body like you're wrapped in another one of his sweet hugs, culminating into tears threatening to spill past your lash line. Chan believed in you and though you'd never admit it aloud, it meant the world to you.
"When did you grow up so much?" you tease, letting out an exhale you didn't realize was being held.
"Aw, c'mon! I've been taller than you for months now!"
"Keep dreamin' if it makes you feel better."
Though Chan sasses back by sticking his tongue out, he lets you ruffle his sweaty bangs despite receiving a slightly bruised forehead in return because you forget about the new gift in your hand. Plotting an escape, he stands and pulls you up with him, joined by your clasped hands.
"We should probably head back. Sister Constance's likely gonna ask us to check the Plant before morning mass and you don't want her to catch you dozing off again."
"Last I recall, you were the one she caught napping!"
"But you have the most demerits this week."
"And whose fault is that?!"
Quick as lightning, he nudges you with enough strength to catch you off guard and destabilize your balance. Then he tears away, calling over his shoulder, "Snooze and ya lose!"
"Ugh, this is exactly why — you never play fair!"
Regathering your bearings at record speed, you dash right after Chan. The boy's raucous laughter echoes in your own lungs and you swear the stars twinkle brighter in the nighttime sky. You overtake him right before reaching the convent's door — the same one you were left on — and clutch at his arm before he can reach past to open it.
"Hey… thanks."
He grins all goofy. Chan's well aware you mean much more than that, but he opts to flick your forehead rather than give you grief over it. "Yeah, yeah. I do so much for you, you know?"
"Mm-hm."
"So it's about time to finally pick a name I can carve onto that bad boy. If you don't, I'll put mine there." He nods to your gun excitedly, then points to the oval. "Oh, and I'll make a chain for that soon. Did you decide what you'll put inside?"
"Questions, questions, demands, demands." You wave him off and open the door with a yawn. "I'll think of one. And yeah, you know that Earthen gadget we found? Gonna cut out those papers and put them in there before sleeping."
Once while digging for materials, you had stumbled across a square object that wasn't completely destroyed, unlike many others. After a few experiments of messing with the random knobs and buttons, you determined it could mimic whatever was directly in front of the clear coated lenses. And later — much to your amusement and amazement — it printed out the image on thick, shiny squares.
Fascinating little things those Earthlings created!
You'd luckily put the last few sheets left in the machine to good use. Experimenting with the surrounding scenery that blurrily featured some of Ivywood's buildings, then one of Chan, and finally wrangled a frame that captured both of you together.
"Do you think you'll be able to stabilize it?"
Your tentative question makes him look toward the large, bulbous structure that houses the Plant. The power source Little Ivywood depended upon.
He sports a cheery grin. "Won't know 'til I've tried!"
"Ever considered too much confidence might be a bad thing?"
"If you're jealous, just say so. But with you by my side, there's nothing we can't accomplish together!" He bounces excitedly on his heels. "Besides, I forgot to mention…" Beckoning you with a hand to come closer, you lean in, curious. "I've become quite the master at bargaining. There won't be a single worm who'll refuse a double dollar from the great Chan!"
"What did you do?"
"What haven't I done?"
"You're the worst. Like to ever exist."
"The absolute best, you mean 'cause there'll be no reason for you to waste any bullets or fear cutting a single lifespan short!"
"Goodnight, Chan."
"You mean 'thank you so much, what would I ever do without you, Chan!' but whatever! You can make it up to me tomorrow!"
But tomorrow never came.
Or rather — daybreak arrived in the unrecognizable form of rapid gunfire and screams of terror. The buildings rattled, trembled, and shook from the onslaught just like the people cowering in fear within them.
The dust stirred up in the chapel's hall after a wall unexpectedly collapsed causes you to cough. Amidst the chaos and panic, you spare a glance over your shoulder to see Sister Meryl, who strides confidently to the altar.
She stands with poise and purpose in front of the marbled stone. Steadfast and unwavering in strength because of her faith alone, even as the grand statue of the Saint starts crumbling down with the ceiling tiles falling around it.
It's a visual you're not likely to forget, carved deep into your memory before you flee with the rest. Sister Lucia is flustered as usual, ushering everyone as fast as she can near the grand oak doors that lead out to where additional shouting can be heard and only more pandemonium must await outside.
You're struck with the damning realization.
The gods — they have completely abandoned humankind.
"That would be ten demerits any other day," Sister Constance voice abruptly snaps, "fortunately for you, now is not the time for such things."
It's astonishing how even at this moment, the nun remains on high alert for 'troublemakers'. Her sharp-nailed fingers latch around your wrist as she breezes by — much too similar to when you've been dragged off to detention. And as if that's what's happening, your heels plant firmly in the ground and obstinately tug her back a step.
"What about Sister Meryl? We can't just leave!"
"If you knew what was good for you, you'll obediently obey me. But if you knew that, you'd recognize faithfulness will guide her and the rest of us to safety."
"Nothing guarantees —"
"Those who do not devote themselves truthfully will never understand. Should the Saint deem Sister Meryl's sacrifice to be in vain, then she has failed not only the Holy Bishop and our sacred bonds, but you — one she unnecessarily dotes on — as well."
You want to argue and protest as Sister Constance yanks you forward. But the faint tremors you feel despite the tight grip of her hand and the tensed jawline of the woman whose stoic face is normally unbreakable makes you pause.
She's shaken. She's unsure. She's wavering.
Sister Constance doubts.
And something about that thrills you. Terrifyingly so.
The shock of it all is as startling as the pale sunlight blinding your eyes when the chapel's heavy doors finally get thrown open. Grains of sand swirl through Little Ivywood, diluting the usual brightness of the glowing orbs in the sky and their powerful rays.
A sandstorm brews on the horizon.
That's the least of your worries, though. Blood stains the soil where shrapnel grazed tender flesh. Fellow orphans scream and cry out from their wounds as they struggle to get away from the captors attempting to drag them to the center of town.
With a chill, you alarmingly realize who they're trying to escape from. Women in black and white robes don a wild, crazed look on their faces. The ones who have raised and cared for parentless children throughout many years and tended to every need they could within their means.
The Blessed and Holy Sisterhood of Little Ivywood.
Sister Constance turns and you jump. Both at the horrors of the present and a reminder of how many times a quick movement of hers led to the sharp pain of a switch or ruler tearing into skin. An eerie sound of laughter rings out and your blood runs cold, eyes darting left and right for the source.
And then through the dust particles, looms the sinister silhouette of a figure in a long trench coat flapping in the wind. Spiked hair sticks straight up, retaining its menacing style despite the powerful wind gusts and emphasizing an already impressive height. You gulp, swearing there's a flash of metal followed by a fanged smirk that glints dangerously as Sister Constance tugs you closer to the terrifying shadow beast shrouded by sand swirling in the air.
A declaration of your given name — stern and cold. "Know that your purpose is being fulfilled, that you are serving the great —"
And then comes a shout of your name, this time from someone desperate and panicked. You're yanked forward and then suddenly catapulted backward, grunting at the impact of your body slamming against someone else's.
"You need to go! You need to get out of here!"
"Chan?!"
He clings to you, shifting so his back is to the nun only a few paces past the corner he dashed around for safety and to stall for time. Throwing a cautious look over his shoulder before whispering urgently, "Go! And don't look back!"
"What about you?"
"Don't mind me." The smooth leather of a satchel presses against your palm. "Get movin'!"
"But —"
"Seriously," the boy shoves you forward with a not-so-gentle push. You gape at the audacity and he waves his hand, like he's shooing away a pesky flying worm. Rude. "Please! I'll be right behind you but —"
An eruption of nearby gunfire and a series of high-pitched shing!-like noises interrupt him. He glances again over his shoulder. You cautiously step forward and his head whips back to let out a hiss.
"Chan, what's —"
"Need to grab a few more things, see if any other idiots need help. Just… just get out of town, wait for me by the rocks if it'll make you feel better." He smiles, though it doesn't make those brown eyes of his sparkle like usual. "It'll… it'll all be okay."
You're uncertain and scared. But something about Chan's speaking powers have always made you believe in the impossible. So, you nod resolutely while taking the bag from him and warn, "Promise you'll be safe."
"You hate those kinds of things."
It's true. To you, promises were only made to be broken. And yet…
"… And somehow you've changed my mind before."
The bangs of carnage draw closer. Louder.
"Fine, just go. Please! And don't look back!"
Acquiescing to his pleas, you sprint toward where he pointed. Sitting like giant sentinels lays an outcrop of boulders bordering the western edge of Little Ivywood. The desert is only two paces away, expanding outward into a desolate plain filled with the undulating slopes of dunes. Picking a sizable rock to hide behind, you keep watch for Chan, cringing at the distant sound of gunshots still rapidly being fired.
What was that? What did you see? And what did you almost get dragged into?
What was going on?
Boom!
It's an ear-shattering noise that causes even the great stones around you to tremble from the explosion. A flare of light so bright leaves you no choice but to look away to protect your eyes, ducking behind the rocks as a shield.
When you recover after it dissipates to see what just happened — Little Ivywood is no more.
It's gone.
"No…"
The tiny town reduced to only rubble and ash. What once were rows of square buildings stacked on top of each other to divert the view of a relatively flat lay of the land are now parallel to its surroundings.
"No… no… no…"
Gone.
You don't think twice about running toward the wreckage. Chan is there. Chan has to be there!
"No!"
And most importantly, he has to be alright.
Broken piles of the shoddy architecture littering the landscape prevents you from traversing too far. Bile rises in your throat as you desperately scan for a sign — any sign — for Chan. For survivors. For anyone. Even the air is still, no longer rippling with irritable heat waves and heavy gusts of wind because the blast was strong enough to ward off nature itself and the incoming sandstorm.
For now.
And during the futile search, that's when you spot him. On his knees with his back to you, slouched over in the only clear space amidst the destruction. The tattered fabric of a cerise garment hangs off the man's broad shoulders and pools around his body like a puddle of blood. Reddish-brown bangs tinged with black hang limply as his chin curls further and further into his chest.
I don't understand, you vent to yourself after a couple ungraceful vaults and stumbling through the debris to get closer. This bastard got what he wanted, did what he wanted, and won! So, why is he acting like that? Who destroyed his town? His people?
Finally, you're a couple steps behind him. Thankful, at the very least, for whatever weird state this man is in because it grants you the opportunity to approach and press the cold steel of your pistol to the side of his temple.
"Don't. Move."
You hope it comes out as the threatening command you intend it to be. There's a tense beat of silence as you wait for his next move until you realize he's doing exactly what you demanded.
Then he chuckles. A choked out, watery sort of sound. Your hands start shaking even as they press the barrel harsher against his head.
"Go ahead and shoot."
"Answer me first." Your voice becomes as unsteady as the quakes in your body and you rasp out, "Why… why'd you do it?"
His head lifts and you flinch, but he takes no further action besides staring blankly ahead at the ruins. "I wish I could tell you but… I've been asking myself the same question."
"I — you…! You wreak hell and havoc upon a whole innocent town and… and you don't even know why?!"
"Pathetic, isn't it?" The man laughs again, without a shred of humor. A gloved hand reaches up to wrap around the weapon and you momentarily falter at the force of him leaning into it. The weight pushing it closer into his skull seems hard enough to leave a nasty imprint, as if that should be a main concern right now. "I'd simply like to know how I did it."
"I —"
"Not loaded," he sighs and drops his hand, twisting around to actually get a proper look at whoever was holding him at gunpoint.
You're taken aback by the intensity of death radiating in those dark brown irises that casually observe you through amber-colored, cracked lenses. Your arms fall down, dumbfounded at the stranger's unflinching behavior, the pistol bumping into your thigh. He lets out a "tsk" and then pulls something out of his pocket.
In his opposite palm, clad in a fingerless glove unlike the left, rests a conical golden object. Though you've never seen one in real life before, you think you know what it is. The shape matches the hollow outlines when Chan disassembled the chambers of your gun.
"A cartridge," he says and you blink. "A bullet," he clarifies upon noticing your confusion. Then the man smiles encouragingly. "Go on. Take it."
You're incredulous. "You're okay with handing that over to me?"
"It's what you want, right?" There's a wistful look on his face. "This place… it was your home."
"No," you're quick to refute, shocked at such an automatic response. Then admitting, "I don't even know what a home is."
Innocent town, my ass, is what you derisively admit inward and snort at yourself.
The convent itself was far from comforting. The other orphans with their bright grins when Saint Meryl sang lullabies on the nights you couldn't sleep — those were the kinds of things that made it bearable.
Guilt.
"I — I —"
It overwhelms your senses. Rattling up your entire nervous system and settling a cruel, cruel weight in your chest. You hunch over, chest heaving, and throat burning. There's a thump as your gun falls to the ground, its silvery sharp edges becoming distorted, warped, and blurred through a film of unshed tears in your widened eyes.
"Should've… It should've —"
"Hey, hey…"
"It should've been me!"
The man rises to his full height, brushing off his clothes before crouching down. A sturdy hand grips your shoulder and dutifully encourages your gasping upper body into an upright position. Gently, ever so fragile, he bops your forehead with his and you subconsciously lean against the unexpected support.
He's near enough to ground you to something solid. But distant enough for two strangers whose first meeting is one amidst a crumbling town's travesty. With his close presence comes the scent of gun smoke, though not as bitterly pungent and putrid as you recall from before. It's subtle and smokey, reminiscent of the fire that Chan once proudly stoked in his makeshift forge.
Your body shakes as the tears finally slip free.
"All lives are equally precious, one shouldn't be sacrificed for another."
"… How can… how can you say that so… easily?"
The death-come-over look in his eyes changes to something faraway. Like he's seeing something beyond the destruction surrounding both of you. Those amber lenses don't have to be cracked to draw attention to the fracturing despair radiating behind them.
Then, he shakes his head and shrugs. "Because you should live even when those dear to you are gone. This world is made of love and peace, after all."
Your crying abruptly pauses with the natural effort it takes to let out a scoff. Ignoring your utter scorn and disbelief, the man's gaze drifts to the pistol still on the ground. The tip of a steel-toed boot kicks it up into the air with a flourish, single-handedly catching it to inspect the weapon with practiced ease.
"Live because there's a reason you survived, even if you loathe every second of it. You'll feel like you don't deserve it. But persevere because you should. Because that's what they would've wanted and you keep them alive by living yourself. A burden? Maybe. Why spend such a cursed blessing only dwelling in regret when you can do so much more?"
He offers the gun back, its handle extended in your direction.
"If nothing else, live for yourself most importantly. Help show the world the love and peace it deserves. Even if it couldn't afford to gift it to you. That's what life is all about. The ticket to the future is always blank!" Pausing, he shrugs with a regret-filled smile on his face. "At least that's what I was taught… and what I think."
"… Awfully full of optimism for some dude who wiped out a full town and doesn't even know why."
"Name's Seokmin," he returns, now sporting a cheeky grin as you cautiously reach out for the pistol. Only to be outsmarted with a literal 'sleight-of-hand' and meeting the warmth of fingers and a gloved palm instead of the expectation of hard, cold, and familiar steel.
"Huh?"
"Lee Seokmin, to be precise! And it's a pleasure to meet 'cha! Erm, despite the… terrible circumstances." Seokmin jiggles the gun in front of you with his other hand, almost taunting you to reach for it again.
You don't.
"And what do you call this lovely lady?"
"Nothing."
"A shame. But not everyone cares to name things, 'specially if they don't hold any value." He finally tosses it back and you barely manage to catch it in time with a scowl.
"Just haven't decided."
"I see! Mine's Geranium."
"Oh, like… the flower?"
He visibly perks up at that even further, a radiant smile showcasing two pointy fangs. "You've heard of it?"
"Well," you scratch your cheek, "the, uh, sisters gave a girl that name because of her hair."
There's an uncomfortable pause as the dreadful realization you'll never see those brilliant ruby locks bounce because of her excitement again settles back into your stomach. You swallow, eyes roaming the stranger in front of you for a distraction.
"Um… you must really like the color… red."
Seokmin glances down at the tatters of his scarlet clothes and shrugs. "I guess. Though the one I saw was red, I've heard they come in different colors."
"You've seen a plant? Like a plant plant? A real one! You know — that grows out of the ground and transforms and all that? It doesn't, well…"
Vegetation was a rarely discussed concept. The only thing you knew came out of the poorly written history books in the dusty library's darkest corner. In the desert outskirts, you had a better chance of finding ancient Earth technology that might still be intact to share its plethora of knowledge about the old world humans left behind than hope to find whatever resources the big cities had access to.
"Mm, yeah, a long time ago. But say," he jovially waves the cartridge from before and it glints in the setting rays of the suns. "Would you care to hear this man's story before shooting him?"
And of course, you listened. What other choice did you have, you who lost everything at once? But even back then, something small and precious was planted in the barren depths of your heart. That was just the beginning. It would continue to grow, watered and tended to under the sunny smile of Lee Seokmin — the destroyer of cities and a very wanted man across the planet.
You leave that tiny bit out during the recitation of your past to the inquisitive pastor. Though something you'll regrettably find out later is he's already got you all figured out.
Bastard.
"… So, that's how I met the infamous Lee Seokmin and didn't end up killing him," you declare with a flourish and take a satisfied gulp of cheap beer picked up from some abandoned mart along the way out of Little Jersey.
Draining another bottle dry, you toss away the metal cap, close one eye, and peer through the narrow bottleneck like it's a telescope — albeit a very poor one.
Through the distorted glass stretch endless sand dunes as far as the eye can see. Stars glitter and sparkle amid the glow of the full moons in orbit, temporarily dimmed by a puff of the roguish's man's cigarette that wafts through the inky darkness.
You wonder if he'd be willing to share one.
"A shame," Seungcheol grumbles and offers a white stick from his pocket.
You take it eagerly only to see it's nothing but — a lollipop. The hard candy's become a strange gooey consistency thanks to melting in the desert heat all day and partially re-solidifying during the nighttime's chilly air.
It's stale too.
Fucker.
You let out a disdainful sniff but nod in agreement to his statement. "It is. But he promised me something. Then his bounty increased from a meager six million to sixty billion double dollars after destroying July, putting a hole in the moon, and all that. So… following him around has paid off."
"I guess," he shrugs, "guess I don't really care 'bout yer lil meet-cute story."
You gape at the audacity. "You're the one who fuckin' asked!"
"Well… figured we could bond, ya know? Orphans 'n all that cozy, feel-good shit."
"You know, not a single thing I've said thus far coud be classified as 'cute'."
"Uh-huh."
"And I never took you to be a sentimental fool."
"Hey, now —"
You hold up a hand. "'Thou shall not bear false witness'."
"As if ya even know what that means," Seungcheol retorts and flicks the ashy cigarette stub in your direction, the cross around his neck ironically reflecting in the moonlight. "Was gonna say, if anythin', I put the mental in sentimental, sweet'art."
Well, you certainly wouldn't argue with that point. "…What I do know is that you're doing this all. For him."
"'Ol Needle Noggin, eh?"
"Well… yeah. But he's only part of a bigger picture for you."
"… 'S none o' yer business, ya know? Best to know less."
Your eyes roll. "Sure. That's why you nearly got hit by our car 'cause you wore a suit into the desert and didn't bring a drop of water. All while hauling that stupid, big-ass cross around! And then you insist on joining us — try to scam us! — but hey," you put your hands up, "none of my business."
"Wasn't tryna scam —"
"Hella shady, man... Hella. fuckin'. shady." You're shocked you can see the man's eyes roll in a begrudging defeat behind his black sunglasses — at night, no less — but you nudge him. "C'mon, just tell me! I bet it has to do with Hopeland, something… or someone back at that orphanage."
"Anyone told ya how irritatin' ya are?"
"Only the ones that are equally just as annoying!"
"Tch, woman." Seungcheol messes up the back of his black hair, mouth opening as he cracks his jaw. There's a pregnant pause. "… 'Han was… he was different. Ya wouldn't get it."
"Try me. Evidently you weren't listening very well, were you?" No surprise there. You retrieve the locket that takes refuge beneath your top, a familiar oval swinging from its long chain between the two of you. "Believe it or not, I do get it."
His eyes fixate on it like a pendulum, darting to your face, and then up to the sky. A crooked smile quirks up the corner of his mouth and he lets out a resigned sigh. "Ya really love 'im, don'tcha?"
You feel a funny sensation.
Akin to getting caught in a horde of flying worms and trying to squash down as many as you can. Your answer is hushed and Seungcheol snickers. Unbeknownst to the two of you that an additional pair of ears — assumed to be asleep — also catches your whispered reply.
"So, how much ya gonna pay for confessin'?" the pastor goads and lets out a startled yelp when you try to smash the hand-held bank he totes around that's shaped like a cathedral.
"Oh, go to hell, Choi!"
"Stare any longer and you'll no longer be needin' Sirocco." An amused snicker follows the relaxed drawl. "Bullets're 'bout to start flyin' outta those eyes 'stead of that gun o' yers."
You scowl at the dumb man seated next to you. "It's not like subtlety has ever been a strong suit of yours. But could you at least pay better attention to your surroundings?" A meager amount of golden liquid sloshes against the sides of the glass you pointedly wave around. "Or are you already too drunk to forget where we are?"
"Ain't no lightweight," Seungcheol brags with his fourth pint of the night in hand and a rapacious grin cockily tilting the empty lollipop stick in the corner of his mouth upward. "Can't say the same for the rest, though. Whiskey's stronger than a punch to the gut."
"… You would know. I'm sure it might just taste like water to some by now."
While it might initially elate most visitors to order as many rounds of the only available beverage on the menu as possible, the reality of the situation was much more grim. As if he can read your mind, the man clad in black, gray, and muted silvers flippantly reminds you of why your so-called merry band of travelers are even here.
"Needle Noggin said 'e fixed the Plant up just fine 'n dandy, so here's hopin' we get some clean bathwater t'night."
At those words, your gaze instinctively shoots back to where it focused earlier. Seungcheol snorts and drains his glass with a satisfactory sigh before poking more fun at you.
"Gonna put a hole through his head at this point."
"Not like that's anything new."
"Yeah, but rather than constantly laserin' holes through his skull, ya should be tryna convince him to fill yers up, instead. 'N not referrin' to that empty space behind yer forehead."
"I know exactly what you mean, you perverted freak."
That cracks Seungcheol up. "'N here I was thinkin' ya was gonna end up a nun servin' the Eye of Joshua!"
By now, you're well-accustomed to the hedonistic ways of the man who still keeps a leather band with a cross on it strapped across his Adam's apple, sewn into the cuffs of his black suit, and carries the hulking shape of one on his weary shoulders.
Unfazed, you fire back, "If they even let someone like you into the blessed and holy ranks, then any whore off the streets would be welcome to join."
It's a series of light-hearted jabs you both take in stride. The truth is much darker and deeper, but tonight serves as a tiny snapshot away from the normal weariness of day-to-day survival in Gunsmoke. Right now, you celebrate alongside the residents of Tonim what peace could really look like in the future.
Except you're on edge.
For a reason that's silly compared to the usual adrenaline rush of tracking down Plants nearing red status and defending the area, all the while trying to prevent the inevitable destruction and chaos to follow. Still, it's why you beckon the bartender over for another refill as a positively "tickled-pink" Seungcheol not-so-silently judges.
"Now who's staring?"
"'Kay, but's not with unbridled lust and — " He's cut off by a sharp kick to the side of his shin delivered by one of your heavy combat boots. "And feelin's," gets wheezed out before the pastor falls silent at your nasty scowl paired with Wonwoo's timely arrival.
The saloon owner and de facto authority in town approaches the two of you cautiously. It's no secret who you are, who you're with. What you do and the things that follow when you do what you do. And yet what you've done has saved the town and given its people — especially the younger folk — something that some of them have never experienced before.
Hope.
And that seems to be good enough proof for Wonwoo. Rumors may just be rumors, after all. None of you are like the reports relayed in a tinny voice through the virtually enhanced radios that are non-plant-powered — aka illustriously dubbed by their inventor as VERnons.
"… the Bloody Rain… follows… Lee… Humanoid Typhoon… armed… dangerous. Punisher… cross… machine gun… two unknown… likely… agents…. Bernardelli Insurance…"
The VERnon sitting behind the counter splutters out bits and pieces of information. He side-eyes the device awkwardly and starts fumbling with the buttons, trying to mumble over the static and monotonous voice.
"Can I pour you another drink?"
"Sure," you chuckle, pleased.
The bartender's well-intentioned efforts are fruitless which is to be expected. Only the creator, and those he personally taught, could truly modify the invention as pleased. A part of you hoped to find evidence Hansol had traveled this far but alas, he was probably still searching through the seven major cities for his beloved Milly before attempting to wander through the treacherous wastelands.
A brown, short-haired darling sneaks awe-filled glances at the two of you from the corner where a group of women around your age gather to chat. Seungcheol's the first to catch onto the admiring starry-eyed gaze and winks. Chuckling when a pudgy hand clings tighter to one of the lady's long skirt, using the fabric as a demure little shield against his effortless charisma.
You catch the tail-end of the interaction with the ghost of a smile. If there's one thing that can definitely soften Seungcheol's rough edges, it's children. You can't blame him, reminded of cheery voices and energetic footsteps pounding after your own through the convent's hallways.
The attractive woman wonders what's drawing the younger girl's attention and leans down to whisper in her ear. Gesturing in your direction, you watch as she nods encouragingly and offers a gentle smile, pushing the tiny brunette forward who readily toddles over. The gaps still waiting for pearly white teeth to grow in that shy smile on the little girl's face are endearingly winsome.
"'Lo, Wonu."
The bespectacled man starts, eyes wide as he peers over the counter and just manages to glimpse the top of her mousy brown tufts. "Is that you, Lina? You're not supposed to be here."
"Past yer bedtime, lil one?"
She huffs indignantly at the two men, hands on her hips. "I've once stayed up 'til four in the morning, mister!"
"Oh, Lina…"
"Besides, how can anyone of good standing sleep properly when there's heroes in town?"
"Huh, what a darlin' angel!"
You scoff at your comrade's words. "As if you've ever seen one."
"I do beg your pardon," Wonwoo scrambles to excuse the child's enthusiasm. "Looks like another talk is due with, uh, Sheryl."
"You're just jealous, Wonu. Sherry says they're heroes."
A chubby finger points at you and Seungcheol and the bartender clicks his tongue — partially in reproach and the other half out of embarrassment. The two of you hardly pay any attention to his reaction, seeming to not mind her boldness at all.
"That's right, sweet'art. And don'tchu forget now." In fact, a certain cross-wearing man revels in it. He rummages deep in his pocket and pulls out a lollipop with a flourish. "'N here's a lil magic gift for ya, princess."
You're one step faster, snatching it and unwrapping the candy with a quick inspection. At least it looks fresh and clean. Seungcheol snorts. Ignoring him, you crouch down and hand it to Lina with a gentle smile.
"Remember to be careful with what you take from strangers."
"I know! But you're heroes… and heroes are always good people! You would never hurt me!" Those blue-green eyes are certainly dazzling as she stares into yours, reminiscent of the clean water now filling the town's reservoir. "You're very pretty."
"That might be the highest compliment I've ever received."
"Pretty people don't hurt anyone either! Sherry's super pretty and she's the gentlest I know!"
A very pretty pastor himself snickers for multiple reasons. Meanwhile, Wonwoo laments with a tired sigh, "Dunno what that crazy woman's been teaching her, I swear…"
"You're not supposed to talk about people you like like that, Wonu!" Lina gives them both the stink eye but returns her attention to focus solely on you — Tonim's loveliest savior in her teal-eyed view. "Will I grow up to be as pretty as you?"
Ah, how your heart aches.
"Even prettier."
"I…" She gnaws on her lip, as if it does anything to hide how much her pleased grin glows. "I wanna be a hero, too!"
"Don't see why you wouldn't become one." To you, she already is — in all her innocent radiance and glory.
"Gotta grow big 'n strong first, missy."
"I am strong!"
"Don't doubt it. But wait 'til yer at least twice my age 'fore ya go swingin' at thugs."
She wrinkles her nose. "I'll be in the grave like Grammy if I wait that long, old man!"
Seungcheol guffaws at her unexpected remark and you hear the bartender beg, "Lina, please!" But you focus on all the brilliance in front of you — from precious unkempt locks to blue eyes full of fire and finally to the worn out, dust-covered shoes.
"Hopefully you'll never need a reason to be the hero, though. It's our duty to keep that from happening."
There's too much hidden meaning and brutal experience in your words for her to fully understand. The lull gives a certain pastor an opportunity to sidle back into the conversation, ready to get up to no good as always.
"Ya wanna meet the hero of all heroes, darlin'?"
"Choi —"
"Yeah!" Lina claps ecstatically.
"Go 'head 'n give 'er yer second key," he coaxes quietly with a shit-eating smirk.
"I swear!"
"C'mon… never like keepin' such a sweet gal waitin'!"
After a minute's hesitation, you begrudgingly agree and take it out.
"Thank ya. Now, got a lil mission for ya, Miss Hero-in-the-Makin'."
"Really?!"
Barely able to conceal her exuberance, she reverently takes the key like it's actual gold and not simply plated. Seungcheol ruffles her hair affectionately.
"Y'see the man in all purple?"
"Mhm, yeah! The one that looks like the night sky?"
"Yeah, give 'im it. Make sure to say it's from this pretty lady."
"Choi!"
"Talk to 'im too 'cause he'll love that. He's a real hero, y'know? Truest of 'em all."
"Yes, sir!"
"Attagirl."
Lina scurries off and you turn back to the counter with a sour glare directed at Seungcheol. "What was that all about?"
"Dunno, cute?"
"I'm really sorry about that all," Wonwoo apologetically interrupts with the offer of another refill which is readily accepted. "She… she's very excitable."
"No need for apologizin', man."
"Yeah, she's adorable. Is she yours?"
The bespectacled bartender stutters, almost dropping the glass he's handing to you. "That's, uh, that's my sister!"
"Ah, makes sense! Didn't mean to assume."
He flushes and turns away. But not without mumbling something about it being okay and your comrade groans.
"Reminder — ya get too drunk, 'm not dealin' with ya ass."
"Great, I don't want you near my ass."
"'S not what I meant!"
"Yeah, yeah."
Seungcheol downs another shot and you're quick to follow his lead once Wonwoo hands over another refill per your shared request. However, this time, the stoic man surprisingly lingers and awkwardly fiddles with his wire-rimmed frames, doing his very best to not let his eyes wander your scantily clad figure as your head tilts back to swallow the burning alcohol.
Meanwhile, the pastor's grin turns wolfish.
"So, uh, who are you, really?"
"Curious, eh?" You lean comfortably onto the counter, braced by your forearms and an alluring smile on your face for the handsome saloon owner. His gaze drifts down to your scar-covered hands which also happen to be placed conveniently underneath your breasts.
You'd once said the best disguise and toughest armor was none at all. And why not flaunt your assets — literally — and put them to good use. The desert is hot anyways!
Seungcheol and Seungkwan both called bullshit. Mingyu applauded you and waved his "I respect women's rights, wrongs, and all the above no matter what!" flag. Seokmin — already used to your behavior and attire — had nothing else to say other than his normal quips of, "As long as you're comfortable".
"Well, a-a beautiful woman like yourself has to have everyone wondering."
And you laughed in the face of your haters every time it worked.
"Just a bounty hunter."
Wonwoo nods at the casual answer, recalling the holster strapped around the plush of your thigh beneath short denim shorts. "Where from?"
"Well… around. My hometown was destroyed so…"
"Oh? Same here."
"Ah, camaraderie." You jab a thumb menacingly in the direction of the purple-cloaked figure and the life of tonight's celebration, currently animatedly chattering to Lina. "That's why I'm turning him in."
"He's…?"
"Yup, Lee Seokmin. Yes," you confirm with a smirk at the way Wonwoo's eyes bug out behind his glasses, "that one — the infamous humanoid typhoon. Don't worry, he won't hurt anything or anyone here."
"He's… uh, he's not quite what I expected."
"Yeah, tell me about it."
"You must be pretty badass to reign him in. Heard he's giving what's left of the July regime officers a run for their double dollars."
"For sure. But it's thanks to the other two drunkards, really. Believe it or not, they're Bernardelli insurance agents. Raven-haired one's Seungkwan and the tall one is Mingyu. They're helping to monitor that whopping bounty of mine and prevent any more disasters from happening. Heard I might get a bump in value if I bring him in alive."
"Oh, well, it looks like it's working. And he seems… willing? To come with you?"
"The irony. Always been quite blasé about facing his doom."
"He's really a Plant engineer, too?"
"Of sorts," you huff at his visible confusion but wave your empty glass. "Can I get another?"
He's more than happy to accommodate and returns with two, sliding one over to Seungcheol with a cautious look at the person who seems the closest to you. "And this is…?"
"Pastor. Pleased to meet'cha."
"Oh! Really?"
"A surprising addition to the mix, yeah. But everyone needs to, like, pray sometimes." And under your breath, low enough so only a certain man can hear, "no matter how sketchy they are."
"Do you, hm, officiate weddings?"
The one in question quirks a thick eyebrow. "Ya lookin' to get hitched, boy?"
"M-maybe."
And Seungcheol feels wholly compelled to bless him silently from the bottom of his blackened heart with full sincerity, seeing as how the bespectacled man timidly peeks your way before his gaze darts elsewhere. "Sorry lad, charge 'bout a thousand double dollars minimum."
While the solitary bartender crashes back into the sad reality of capitalism, you jab your elbow into the pastor's ribcage. "Fuckin' scammer."
"Only the best of the best! Ya know, sixty billion's still on the table — 'n it better be callin' my name."
"No one even has sixty billion double dollars!"
"We have 'im." And he points back to where hoots and hollers erupt from the center table of the saloon.
Lina's returned to the woman she was with earlier — presumably her beloved Sherry — but that doesn't mean Seokmin's alone. There's so much disdain in your side-eye, spotting the busty violet-haired sweetheart his arm wraps around. After all, he's the worst kind of ladykiller.
And by that, you mean he absolutely sucks at flirting and can't get or keep a partner to save his life. Yet you're constantly stuck witnessing women, men, and attractive people of all kinds throw themselves at the good-looking man until he opens his mouth and they're put off by his clear lack of suaveness or strange little idiosyncrasies.
"Stop with the stupid bet, it's not happening. Nobody's going to be winning a thing."
"It's called usin' the damn 'magination, darlin'!"
"Which means you need to get better hobbies. You've corrupted my friends!"
"Hah! Them fools were already too invested in this 'fore I ever came along."
"Fill me up again?"
Intent on ignoring Seungcheol, you belatedly realize how aggressive your request comes across. You're also eager for something to help soothe ache in your chest. It comes and goes like a bad toothache — manageable enough to forget about the pain until it returns tenfold.
Thankfully, Wonwoo meekly complies with the back tips of his ears tinged red and Seungcheol barely manages to hide his extreme amount of mirth for the situation behind another glass. In the dim lighting, at certain angles, and with another shot of whiskey settling into your system, you conclude that the handsome saloon owner could certainly pass as Seokmin's brother and vice versa.
But you know the truth.
Familiar with the one who's all too identical to the infamous gunslinger, yet entirely different altogether. Irritation flares in your gut, prickling harsh enough that even the burn of alcohol fails to drown it out.
"I'm turning in for the night."
"Smartin' idea."
"Don't get too smashed."
"You should get smashed."
"Bye, Choi."
Tipsiness is a great excuse to bump purposely into him as you get off the stool. It's only thanks to his genetically enhanced metabolism that the pastor's able to stay upright. He grumbles something that's likely insulting, but standing upright causes you to realize you drank way too much. Everything spins or sways, including your body as you stumble up the stairs.
Somehow, you safely make it to the second level. Above the saloon is a hallway of small bedrooms that Wonwoo generously loans out to routine drunkards or stray travelers. It takes a few minutes of fumbling around but you finally find the lock that matches the first of its paired key and tumble face-first into (thankfully clean) bedsheets.
A hazy mix of drifting in and out of consciousness follows. It's not until the door clicks and there's an ominous creak of floorboards followed by a noticeable presence creeping up at your side that fully rouses you from the feverish dreams of gunfire, explosions, and loss that still plague your mind to this day.
You roll over, intending to assume both an offensive and defensive position against the nighttime visitor, but a hand lands on your shoulder before you can. Still sluggish, there's no way you could ever hope to outmatch the humanoid typhoon, even at your best.
"Hey, you."
It takes a bit for your eyes to adjust to the darkness after hearing his voice — and then there he is. Sitting on the edge of the bed, Seokmin greets you with a fond, megawatt grin. The thumb of his cybernetic prosthesis gently traces little circles over your bare skin. There's a faint hum and glow from its advanced tech mechanics, paired with moonbeams from the window, casting off an ethereal radiance.
"So, you're staying here tonight?"
"But of course, isn't that why you sent such a cute little cherub my way?"
Ah, Lina. You unwittingly smile, remembering how joyful she was to accomplish her mission.
Then your eyes close, nose wrinkling at the copious stench of mixed perfumes and alcohol he brought in and refusing to acknowledge what he says.
"You hella reek."
"Says the one who drank over seven shots."
"… That preacher's a fuckin' tattler. And a liar. And a total scammer. Don't fall for him, Seok."
"Now, what makes you think Seungcheol told me, hm?" He leans down almost nose-to-nose, enough to make yours scrunch even more at the buzzing feeling of how near he is. Your eyes open to squint at him and he winks. "Silly boy tried to mess with god again and max out his intake. Spoiler alert, he failed. Mingyu dragged him back to his room."
"You're the only one I know who can call Choi a 'silly boy'."
"'Cause that's what he is."
"And you need to stop acting like my babysitter!"
You shift away from his gorgeous face and he leans back to give you space, sporting a smug grin. "Then who would take care of you, mayfly?"
"How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that?"
"Be nice to me and maybe I won't keep count on how many glasses you down next time," he teases. "But since I'm so kind and forgiving, would you like a nice, warm, relaxing bath?"
Well, it did sound wonderful. TMI, but cleanliness was a luxury when traveling the desert. Even more so when the places you arrived at had Plant issues. Luckily, Seokmin was more than capable of fixing them but even then, circumstances varied. Especially around the one known across Gunsmoke as mankind's first localized human disaster.
"Only if you get one, too."
It slips from your mouth without a thought. But you might as well have told Seokmin you'd gotten him a box full of doughnuts with how delightedly he clasps his hands together.
"As you wish, m'lady!"
And he treats you like one, scooping you up into his arms in a princess-style carry. At least tonight you're more willing to let him do as he wishes, especially when he discards the perfume-infused outerwear. Whiskey, sleepiness, and the smooth material of his undershirt keep you pliant and cuddly well after he'd snatched you off the bed.
Seokmin's already ten times stronger than even a human like Mingyu and his prosthesis only helps take further advantage of that fact. He easily deposits you on the edge of the tub. Normal routine would require untying the tight laces on your combat boots but since you'd kicked them off prior to resting, he skips to the next step.
Deft fingers make quick work unbuttoning your shorts, the prosthetic digits of his left hand then moving to loosen the straps that keep your top on. His other hand holds them together in a pseudo-knot to keep the material in place.
Honoring a sense of modesty, you suppose — even though you've seen each other unclothed before. But you melt into the secure press of his palm paired with the support of his chest against your back as he leans over to turn on the water.
"Let me know if it's a good temperature."
"M'kay."
"You're so agreeable when drunk!"
"And you're still just as annoying."
"Okay, okay," he relents. Amicably even.
Seokmin never enjoys butting heads like Seungcheol constantly does. Although another "mayfly," gets tacked on to the end of his playful yield in a mischievous tone because if there is one thing, it's that he can never tease you enough.
Brown eyes quietly trace the ink and scars that mark your skin, some disappearing or completely hidden beneath the parts that are covered. Finally, they land on the silver chain around your neck, only a breadth away from the tip of his fingers that suddenly twitch at how soft you feel beneath the calloused roughness of his own skin.
You let out a little sigh and it shakes him from his reverie, noticing the tub's filled up past your calves. Guiding one of your hands to where the locket lies beneath your clothes covering your chest, he stands. "Call me if you need anything or just want help getting out, m'lady."
"'Kay."
You're already stripping bare but Seokmin breezes out the door before you can blink. You sigh again and slip into the hot water, enjoying a soak to ease the heaviness you feel.
It's hard to understand this emotional turmoil. Knowing that you don't enjoy feeling this way, you make a false promise to not drink ever again, staying submerged in the water until your fingers wrinkle.
Maybe you fell asleep, maybe you didn't. There's a bathrobe laid on the sink when you're ready to get out that you don't remember from before but who knows. Who cares? It's cozy and you haven't felt this clean in a while.
"All yours," you lazily declare, stepping into the bedroom.
Seokmin perks up from where he casually sits cross-legged on the bed, fiddling with Geranium. A dopey smile lights up his face, gaze moving from the hefty nickel revolver and zoning in on you.
"All mine?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah," he repeats quieter, more to himself, "all mine…" But when you unconsciously shiver, his eyes flash and brows furrow. "C'mere, I warmed the bed up for you."
"Aren't you going to bathe?"
"Yep, so don't miss me too much, my dear mayfly!"
He accompanies it with a saucy wink and saunters into the bathroom, humming. You find yourself in a bit of a daze, head and cheeks holding onto the heat of the steam from your bath (and more). You change into a light tank and cotton shorts before sitting back down. As promised, where Seokmin rested was indeed warm and smells of faint gun smoke that always brings back memories.
"Total slaughter…!"
Splash!
"… Total slaughter…"
Splash!
"I won't leave… a single man alive."
Splash! Splash!
"La de da de dai~," echoes from the bathroom. "Genocide…"
Splash.
"La de da de duh," splash, splash, splash, "an ocean… of blood."
"Let's begin… the killing time."
Seokmin possessed a lovely melodic voice no matter how nonsensical or gruesome the words he sang. Your eyes close with relaxation as he continues into a different tune. Though the lyrics are definitely more hopeful this time, there's a heavy sense of underlying desolation despite the rapid, upbeat tone.
"So…" splash, "on the first evening," splash, "a pebble from somewhere out of nowhere drops upon the dreaming world…"
You think back to how he silently cried when he thought no one was looking after a young stowaway on the sandsteamer broke into the same nostalgic song. Your heart aches in empathy for the woman whose heroic sacrifice saved humankind but left behind irreparable damage to twins she adored.
Rem Saverem.
She was to Seokmin as what Saint Meryl was to you. But your fondness for the nun who dared to favor one random orphan above the other equally ordinary ones with an unprecedented amount of kindness paled in comparison to the devotion Seokmin exhibited for Rem. Her kindness, hope, and love for and of life didn't simply become Seokmin's philosophies — they were a true part of every fiber, woven into his very being.
He was peculiar. Hardheaded — or in Seungkwan's affectionate term: a hardass — when it came to nonviolence. A true pacifist. Even when enemies held him at gunpoint, allies turned their backs on him, and his choice to always save was at the very cost of his well being… Seokmin would choose to tear himself apart limb by limb before ever causing damage or letting harm come to another.
And even if he always chose the world and those living in it first before anything else, that's what you loved the most about him.
"What's got you making that face?"
You're quick to school whatever expression it might be. Your tongue feels fuzzy. You purse your lips as he lumbers closer, freshly dressed in a comfy white long-sleeved shirt and black sweats.
"What face?"
"You know, the one where something's weighing on your mind."
The bed frame dips and squeaks when he flops down to snuggle against you. Still-damp, reddish-brown bangs lay across your shoulder and dampen your skin. The chilled press of the gold hoop in his left earlobe raises bumps wherever it touches as he endearingly nuzzles you.
"There is."
"Tell me."
"You need to dry your hair properly."
"Do it for me."
"… This is on purpose, isn't it?"
Nevertheless, you take the unused towel around his neck and vigorously rub at his head. No complaints or protests defending his honor come from Seokmin. Just the usual little trills of contentment escape as he leans into your touch. Once you're satisfied the job's done well, he plucks the towel from your hands and you fix him with a stern look.
"Well, Seok? You gonna answer me?"
He curls in on his lanky frame, enough so to find room to plop his head pitifully onto your thighs and nuzzle the bare skin with his nose. "Not if you won't answer me first."
"You."
"Hm?"
"Was… thinking about you."
"Oh, really? Dreaming about how cool, dashing, handsome, and awesome I am?"
"… Yeah. I like you."
He chuckles, closing his eyes. More so at the feeling of your fingers idly playing with his strands of hair than seriously taking what you say. "I like you, too!"
"No, I mean," you jostle him harshly as you shift anxiously, tugging a little too hard at his roots. "Something's wrong with me."
"… Mhm yeah, you've been drinking."
"Goddamnit, Seok… that was like hours ago! But… what if… what if I'm in love with you?"
Your fingers retract like you've been caught red-handed stealing Mingyu's pudding and a millisecond later, Seokmin's head flies off your lap as he sits up to stare incredulously at you and can only gasp out one word, "What?"
It comes out more like a statement than a question. You've seen all kinds of emotions appear in those clear brown eyes of his. Emptiness. Excitement. Happiness. Fear. Loneliness. Mysteriousness. Pain. But now, you can hardly make sense of what turmoil is swimming in those murky depths.
"There's no way," he shakes his head — laughter high and brittle. "Fake", is what Seungcheol occasionally points out whenever he spies the gunslinger's smile. You've never believed him until now. "You're drunk."
Seokmin's been hurt before and you know that. It's why you wish for him to be nothing but happy, that there's some truth to the joy he constantly tries to radiate. Hoping some parts are really healing, that he's giving time to let the bloody wounds coagulate — if even just a little.
"It's me. I mean, I'm the one that's drunk," he reiterates, shaking his head.
"Why are you acting like that?"
"… Like what?"
Perhaps you were too hopeful.
"Like I'm making some sort of mistake. Like I'm wrong about this. About us."
And still under the influence of the too-damn-strong alcohol.
"It's… none of that, it's just…"
"You think I don't know what I'm talking about."
"Well, do you?" he fires back rather harshly, "'cause you're still wearing that thing and —"
You wince as his voice breaks off, palm instinctively flying to where the locket rests. "What the hell does that have to do with anything right now? I thought we were over this! Years ago!"
"Maybe you were since you continue to stubbornly follow me everywhere!"
"I'm not the only one!"
"Yeah, 'cause no one ever listens to me!"
"I always listen to you, Seok. Even if the words that come out of your mouth don't match how you actually feel —"
"You don't know how I feel!"
Silence.
Seokmin's chest heaves, wide eyes taking in how you immediately freeze. That look, oh, that look on your face could kill him and his body moves on auto-pilot to stand, directing his gaze to stare daggers into the floorboards. Begging them to rip off like a bandaid and shield him from your wrath.
The wood beneath his feet groans, shaking ever the slightest.
"You're right. How dare I?"
"Wait, mayfly… I —" he switches gears with a plea of your given name.
"And obviously, you have no fuckin' idea how I feel." Now it's your turn to let out a disingenuous chuckle, fake humor cracking under the pressure of sadness it's struggling to mask. "You think all I'm after is revenge more than the actual thought even crosses my mind. You put on this show that nothing bothers you, make assumptions that no one can keep up with you, that you can do it all on your own."
"No, that's not… that's not what I meant! You know how dangerous —"
You stumble ungracefully off the bed, flinching away when Seokmin's words break off as he automatically reaches out. For you. To support and for support.
Yet, it hurts all the more.
"But what do I even know? How can I, when you keep everyone at arm's length? It's like… it's like I don't even know who you are! Like you're someone else, someone I'll never get to understand…"
To others, it might not make sense, possibly the dumbest thing you could say — especially with the state you're in. But you know Seokmin, a fact he's subconsciously taken comfort in.
But you also know Seokmin. Which means you know the exact place to hit him where it hurts the most.
And suddenly, those words you say propel him back into a moment from the past, body free-falling in the sky.
Yelling. Crying. Screaming. Pleading.
Begging that exact phrase and being demanded of the same accusation. All from the one who's falling with him. Whose face mirrors his own, but couldn't be more different in that crucial and devastating moment.
His brother. His twin. His other half who was once his everything — now a total stranger from the person he thought he knew.
A fifty-year-old reunion that should've been a reconciliation, turned into a doomsday.
And for you, the once simple toothache pain is now overwhelming your full body and you refuse to let him see how it's dampened your cheeks. Especially when you hear the pained whisper of the name that escapes his mouth when you're the one that triggered those awful memories. Staggering to the door, you yank it open and he instinctually takes a step forward.
Don't leave me.
You hear the unspoken plea as clearly as if spoken aloud.
"Don't follow me," is what you hiss out instead, and just like when you first met, Seokmin obeys.
When Seungkwan makes room arrangements — if there is enough money to spare when needed and the options are available — he books everyone their own private space. More often than not though, he and Mingyu share a room and so do you and Seokmin.
Out of everyone in the group, you're the only one who is used to putting up with Seokmin's idiosyncrasies and the constant white noise of the cybernetic prosthetics's technology. You've rarely paid mind to having your own space unless Seokmin gets in one of those rare 150-year-old moods and wants some time by himself. Rare in nature, because he doesn't enjoy being left alone with his thoughts that threaten to consume him.
But he'll have to make due tonight. For the first time, you're extremely grateful for Seungkwan's pro-activeness.
You lock the door, crawl into a fresh cold bed, and wet a new pillow — one that lacks the comforting scent of gun smoke — with unshed tears.
For all his short-tempered and sassy mannerisms, Seungkwan is quite the worrywart. When the suns have peeked past the horizon and you're not already downstairs bullying Seungcheol, he's immediately knocking at your door and inquiring about your well-being. You assure him you're just hungover and he reluctantly leaves you be, likely picking up on how terrible you really do sound.
By high noon, Mingyu raps on the door next. He even sweetly offers to share his prized pudding in the hopes that you'll peek your head out. Though you appreciate it, you send him away, too — after reassuring the sensitive man you'll feel better after some rest.
Seungcheol doesn't miss the chance to be annoying times ten. He doesn't indulge in the effort of knocking, opting to make the floorboards squeal by pacing back and forth in front of the door. All the while, muttering this and that about "yer boy's like a pathetic dog and blah, blah, blah" until getting very kindly told to "fuck off!" and dragged back downstairs by a certain raven-haired insurance agent.
Even Seokmin checks in. Four times.
Once and then twice after you'd left and he'd figured out which room was yours. Then two more visits throughout the following day. He doesn't exactly make his presence known — but you know he knows you know he's out there.
If not by the distinct gait you've picked up on listening for after all this time, then by the hesitant thuds of combat boots lingering outside your door. Lost technology whirring with the action it takes to make a fist with his left hand, raising it up to the door and then back down again in self-inflicted defeat.
You refuse to see anyone, choosing to pity yourself first. Wallowing in your feelings and then sleeping as much of the heartache — and more so the hangover — away.
When the moons are visible in accordance to their nightly orbit, you get up to fuss with the mini VERnon in the room's corner. Nothing but static greets you. At the very least, the white noise is better than complete silence. By the time it's morning, you slowly awaken to the virtually enhanced radio trying to catch onto a faint signal. Enough to report the latest news in snippets with its mechanical voice.
"Beast… reported… Tonim town… !"
Your eyes fly open. Now is not the time to be wasting away. Donning a clean set of attire similar to what you wore into town — and with Sirocco strapped comfortingly to your thigh — you descend downstairs.
"Good morning!" Mingyu cheerfully greets with a delighted shout of your name and eagerly waves you over to sit next to him, waving around a promised cup of pudding. "Are you feeling better?"
"Mhm, thanks. Sorry about that, whiskey here sure is strong."
"'S one helluva killer," Seungcheol sulks across from you, still sporting a massive headache and looking worse than that one time Seungkwan hit him with the car.
"You're just weak."
"Wha'zat say 'bout you?"
"Since I can equally acknowledge both my strengths and weaknesses, that makes me infinitely stronger than you'll ever be."
Seungkwan wordlessly hands you a bowl and you graciously accept it. Next to the pastor sits Seokmin, unnaturally quiet. You don't even spare him a glance even though brown eyes burn into the side of your face until you glare his way.
The stack of doughnuts on the plate in front of him remain untouched — minus the smudged icing on one that was likely from Seungcheol trying to swipe it. Evidently, Seokmin was in low spirits if he didn't want to consume his favorite desserts. But, he is still prideful enough to prevent anyone else from snatching the prized delicacy.
How typical.
An awkwardness ensues, charged with an underlying current of tension. A vein forms in Seungkwan's forehead from his blood pressure rising.
Its pulse matches the twitch in the corner of his fake smile as he attempts to make conversation, to which Mingyu — oblivious and happy-go-lucky as ever, bless his heart — replies enthusiastically. Seungcheol stares listlessly into space, twirling a lollipop around and around with his tongue. Next to him is a soul acting like a thunderstorm's personally pouring over him. Seokmin starts pitifully poking at his grand doughnut pile while you ferociously tear into a piece of bread like it's the last supper before swallowing.
"Soonyoung's coming."
Your unexpected, but welcomed, interruption ironically pauses Seungkwan's second diatribe about Hansol's calamitous ingenuity. If possible, the apprehension in the room intensifies tenfold.
Seungkwan raises an eyebrow. "How'd you hear?"
"Tuned the VERnon last night."
"'Course you did."
"Something about the Beast and Tonim came through. Not for sure but…"
"It never hurts to be too prepared!"
"True, 'Gyu. 'N if Soonyoungie's gonna be there, ya know what that likely means…"
You nod in understanding at Seungcheol's implication. "The Crimsonnail."
Seokmin's jaw clenches at the name but it's the disgruntled pastor who continues speaking after a hearty and loud gulp of water. "'Course the Eye of Joshua's gonna send their best two. Soonyoungie's Hoon's eyes 'n ears for these kinda things."
"Or… it could be Jeonghan."
Your noncommittal remark receives Seungcheol's scathing glower. "Bet."
"It wouldn't be the first time," you shrug.
"There haven't been any notable disturbances and the ground's been stable. So hopefully their only goal is to simply antagonize us further."
Antagonize.
A funny word for such a twisted coin game between a hunter and the hunted. You can't and don't blame the younger Bernardelli agent — only you were privy to most of the true horrors Seokmin dealt with behind the scenes, Seungcheol a close second. And because of that, you were usually the one at his side before an encounter with Jihoon and the ever lingering threat and terror of said man's monstrous power.
But today, you get up from the table without so much as a glance in his direction. Only a parting command of "Let's regroup near the entrance at high noon," while Seungkwan and Mingyu exchange looks of minor distress.
The black-haired man in his hangover blues obnoxiously blows a raspberry as you leave.
Later, there are two solid knocks on the door as you get ready. You know who it is before the door swings open after your agreeable hum to enter. Many may be intimidated at the sight of the silver weapon in your gloved hands. Seungkwan and Mingyu make up half of the quartet who aren't.
They take a seat on the bed as you purse your lips at the reflection in the dusty mirror. Then you fuss with the strap for your gun. Satisfyingly re-securing it around your thigh before throwing a carmine trench coat over tight kevlar that covers almost every inch of skin possible.
"Surprised you didn't dye everything else black during a fit of rage."
Your lips curl upwards. "How on Gunsmoke would I manage that?"
"With the way you're acting, 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned…' or so the saying goes."
"Really, 'Kwan?"
"I'm an avid supporter of women's rights and especially their wrongs."
"Sure you are."
"You would absolutely look dashing!"
"Thanks, Mingyu. Should've given my color scheme a little more consideration."
"But then you wouldn't have achieved such an infamous moniker. I mean, okay. Maybe the black plague killed tons of Earthlings eons ago but it doesn't have the same ring as 'Sirocco, the bloody rain that follows after the humanoid typhoon'…"
Seungkwan allegedly graduated at the top of his class, leave it to him to spew out all kinds of random facts that you know nothing about. You huff and adjust the brim of the large hat atop your head.
"All that does is make me cringe."
"Uh-huh, so what's making him act like that?"
"Who's acting like what?"
"Fine, keep playing dumb. Did you reject Seokmin or something?"
Mingyu gasps. Dramatically. Hands on cheeks and mouth open in a wide 'o' shape, puppy-dog eyes glistening with despair.
"There's no way!"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Uh-huh."
"Besides, nothing happened so don't think you're gonna wheedle out of me whether you're going to win that stupid bet you two have going with Choi."
"Eh, don't worry. I've been out of the running for a while now, unfortunately."
"The hell did you even throw for?"
He shoots you a deadpan look. "Guess who's aged eighty years watching the two of you dance around each other like dumbasses? Could've sworn you'd be married with a toma farm or a dozen little children by now."
"It's your own damn fault for falling victim to that pastor's salacious schemes. And it's not even remotely like that, so…"
"Someone just doesn't wanna give in."
You stomp your foot, frustration boiling over. "Ugh, I'm never drinking again!"
"Wait… No fucking way…!"
"Literally shut up, Boo."
"I mean Choi did bet you'd confess and you know… get intimate afterwards… if you were drunk so…"
"Oh, so that's why he was so damn pushy last night."
"Dirty cheater."
"You expect anything less from someone like him?"
A sigh. "No."
It's a well-known fact that Seungcheol would rather stoke the flames of hell than ever needlessly dabble with holy water as one might be expected to with his chosen career.
"But judging by both of your moods, evidently nothing happened." The raven-haired man really has the gall to look disappointed that no one won yet pleased Seungcheol didn't, and the gall to point out the obvious. "Anyways, what did you bet on, Mingyu?"
"Don't recall!"
"Figures." Seungkwan's face falls flat against his palm with a groan before dragging it wearily down his face. "Whatever, it's not like it's that serious. Seriously," he adds on, feeling the burn of your perpetual glower. "Don't let it weigh on your mind. We need you fully focused."
"And when have I ever been less than what's expected of me?" You hold up a hand. "Wait! Don't answer. But really, worry more about that idiot."
"Aw, see? You still care!"
"… About that sixty billion bounty, Mingyu? Yeah."
"Sure you do."
"And truthfully, I was talking about Choi, 'Kwan."
"Well, both of them always get into those zany headspaces!"
You shrug at the tall man's truthfulness. "They're both holding a lot of trauma and baggage."
"And you aren't?" Seungkwan snorts with sarcasm dripping from the dig.
"At least mine's manageable. And… hasn't threatened your lives yet."
"As far as we know."
"In fact, I think I've saved your 'so-very-untraumatized' lives more often than not. Stay with me and you'll both be okay."
They good-naturedly give you individual looks of disdain. Perfectly in sync when you accompany that last statement with a devilish smirk and a twirl that flares out your tail coat with a flourish. By no means are they incapable. Clumsy Mingyu can adeptly wield his massive concussion gun when it counts, of course, and Seungkwan stealthily hides several derringer 'throwaway' pistols under his white cloak that he can fire with deadly precision.
Nonetheless, they loyally flank to your side when Tonim's bell tower signifies the hour of high noon has struck. Seungcheol meets the three of you outside the door of the saloon, smoking a cigarette and one arm lazily draped over the Punisher — a terrifying machine gun mockingly designed in the burdening shape of a merciful cross.
You spot Seokmin up ahead. He's standing on the low border wall near the town's entrance, perched next to a pillar for back support with the heel of his boot propped up behind him. Decked out in the usual galaxy ensemble, purple fabric cut off at shoulder-length of the top left sleeve to allow free range of movement for his prosthesis. His hair's slightly gelled up for a more intimidating and dramatic flair and it almost makes you giggle.
But there's that stern gaze focused on the horizon, likely able to see far out into the distance through those amber lenses the human eye can't quite decipher. Despite such a hardened resolve, his head tilts slightly up toward the blue sky with a faint smile on his lips — an honoring appreciation for the beauty and wonder of life despite its inevitable horrors.
Seungcheol clicks his tongue to get your attention while Seungkwan and Mingyu keep walking ahead. "Spiky Hair thinks he's really gonna do it?"
"Won't stop until he's tried every last resort."
"Even if it kills 'im?"
"Even if it kills him."
"This damned situation 'cause of ya know who."
"Dokyeom. DK."
"Nah, nah. There's the asinine version, eh?"
"Absolute pain in my ass?"
He slaps his knee. "Ah, aye… good one! But nah, 's really stupid one, Deathly, uh, er…?"
"… Deadly Knives?"
"Pfft, yeah, 's that one. So, we gotta try 'n stop one genocidal brother from sweepin' out the whole human race 'n tryna convince greedy humans not to keep exploitin' 'em with the other. Back 'n forth again 'n again. I swear…'s only ever gonna be impossible."
"What makes you think it can't happen?"
He looks at you like you're stupid. Maybe you are. But what does that make him? "Both sides — humans versus DK — think they're right 'n too proud to think otherwise."
"So you don't think they'll settle for a compromise. Or at least try to see the other's viewpoint?"
"Hell naw. Ain't no compromisin' when both think they're justified in what they're doin'."
"Well, regardless — you joined a good cause, Choi. World could use a little more peace and love, don't you think?"
He grunts. "Lookit who's corrupted yer ideologies. Don'tcha know what destroyed Earth?"
"And do you know what saved humans? Kindness. Hope. Empathy. Compassion. Change. Making and being the difference. The good kind."
A long time ago, maybe in a different twist of fate, you might've staunchly agreed with Seungcheol. But despite it all, you've been somewhat changed — or like the pastor said, call it a corruption of sorts — by Seokmin's unwavering sense of positivity and kindness no matter how bleak the future.
You admired him. Truly.
"Un-fuckin'-'lievable."
Seungcheol shakes his head as if he's not gearing up, ready and raring to go as he stomps forward to join a fellow 'brother-in-arms'. The thought inwardly makes you smile with affection until you remember you're actually, in fact, mad at Seokmin.
A dust cloud stirs up on the horizon, steadily growing closer to where you stand.
"You're so full of goddamn self-flagellation."
The individual where all your ire is centered on jolts, doing a double-take at your sudden but familiar presence by his side approaching. Or maybe it was the mere fact you were talking to him again. A warm expression overtakes his facial features at the sense of calm that automatically relaxes the tension in his muscles as he looks down at you.
"Well then, hello to you too. Feeling better, mayfly?"
"… Remind me to never drink again."
"I told you —"
"Yeah, yeah." You wave away his nagging and step up on the wall to stand next to him. "Don't worry, I won't be making a mistake like that again."
"… Mistake?"
There's an edge to his tone. Searching. Sometimes you hate how perceptive Seokmin can be. Though he actively acts oblivious and carefree, it's usually a ploy to lower other's guard.
You wonder how long he's known.
So, you sigh. "I'm talking about drinking, of course. And… I wish I could say I forgot even if… I haven't. But it's fine, I know where I stand."
The latter part of your sentence trails off. It's true though. You do know — thankful you can even be next to Seokmin. You might not be with him but at the very least, your place will always be somewhere by his side. Affectionate flings may be sought elsewhere. But they're always temporary. In your heart of hearts, you know you're irreplaceable to him.
And that's going to have to be good enough for you.
The man in question scratches the back of his head. "It's not… it's not like that. I know I fucked up."
"Stop." You grip at his prosthetic, knowing despite how sensitive the sensors are, they won't be able to pick up how you slightly tremble. "It's okay. Really."
Who is it you're trying to reassure?
"Mayfly," Seokmin murmurs. "Look at me."
With the slightest hesitation, your gaze finally rises from its focal point centered on his boots and the stones beneath to meet dark brown eyes. The ache in the gunslinger's chest eases just a little. It's been far too long — a day, in actuality — since he's got to lose himself among the vibrant hues of your irises and he squeezes your free hand in gratitude.
"It's not okay, I want to talk to you. Sober. But…"
"I get it. Now's not the time for a heart-to-heart, especially not in front of your brother's henchmen."
You laugh, for real this time. The sight is breathtaking; it makes Seokmin's eyes crinkle, a fond smile to accompany his affection as he leans in closer to you to whisper a sweet, "Thank you."
Three sets of eyes try to make it very not obvious that they're very obviously totally not watching the overdue interaction with bated breath.
"Oh golly good, they've made up!"
"'Course they would."
"It's about time, I couldn't take the tension anymore."
"Don'tcha think it'll get worse once they start canoodlin'?"
"Good lord," Seungkwan groans, "perish the thought."
"What's wrong with a little love? Yay for love!"
"Well, I don't think they've made it that far yet. But we're getting there. Baby steps."
It would be a good cause for celebration, a resumption of last night's festivities. Unfortunately, the merry moment is cut short with a screech of brakes, signaling the arrival of Jihoon, DK's most elite performer in his unmerry band of henchmen.
Next to the feared Crimsonnail's suitcase sits Soonyoung the Beast. Silver strands peek out behind the unsettling, bug-like circular mask hiding his face. He casually waves, acting like the unnerving discovery behind the innocent, abandoned child — who went by Hoshi — was simply a facade initially put on around your group and not such a grand revelation.
Having sorted that out in the stomach of a giant flying worm serving as a hive mind for Gunsmoke's legion of its original inhabitants and swearing not to let your guard down again, all five of you remain on high alert.
Jihoon's steel-colored eyes flicker to Seungcheol. "Hello there, Undertaker. Or… should I say Judas?"
"Howdy dandy to ya too, ya son of a bitch," the pastor snarls, spitting his cigarette in their direction. Cursing under his breath when the distance and uselessness of the fizzling stub doesn't blow up the engine like he wishes it would.
"Now, now. You don't want to make me mad, do you?"
"Kinda wanna piss ya off as much as ya piss me off, yeah."
"Surely you know what —"
"He means nothing by it." You'd quickly abandoned your post next to Seokmin to place a hand on Seungcheol's taut shoulder. Boldly facing the blonde man's haughty expression with one that's hopefully placating enough on behalf of your comrade. "He's just grumpy because he's still hungover."
"Well, well… if it isn't the humanoid typhoon's little blood shower."
Ugh, you inwardly grimace, why the fuck does everyone have such unflattering nicknames for me?
"Still following him around, I see."
"'S a lot comin' from —"
" — Hasn't gotten rid of me yet!"
"… Seems it," Jihoon sniffs and cocks his head. "Similar to the dilemma I have with this persistent bug."
Soonyoung chortles, neck contorting at an unnatural angle to peer at the driver. "You love me."
"You're delusional."
"Why are you here?"
Seokmin's question comes sharp and pointed like a dagger, a far cry from his usual demeanor. His tone remains detached. Aloof. Vaguely accusatory. Unlike your harried action to cover for Seungcheol, you don't dare divert attention away from the gunslinger who stalks forward after elegantly hopping down from his perch. Despite an outwardly calm demeanor, there's an underlying urgency in his gait that's threatening to snap.
"For amusement. A show, if you will."
"One that's not even orchestrated by Joshua's freakish cult powers!"
Out of all the males surrounding you, you're not sure exactly who growls at the Beast's mere mention of the devil-like figurehead — in fact, it could've been all of them — but there's one noise that rings out above the din of it all.
Click!
You don't need super-hearing to pick up that telltale sound. Not when every person over the age of eighteen in Tonim has a cocked gun trained on each member of your ragtag gang.
"Uh, so… how many times is this?"
"One too fuckin' many," you answer Seungkwan with a petulant hiss and reluctantly mimic him by putting your hands up in the air.
Jihoon cackles. "And when will you fools ever learn?"
"'S my question, actually," the pastor nonchalantly calls over his shoulder, directed at the town's ringleader. "Didn't know ya had it in ya, boy."
You didn't think Wonwoo had it in him either, to be honest. But that's not something you were going to mention aloud with the shaky hold the bespectacled man has on the firearm waveringly aimed at his target — the one whose head is worth a 60 billion double dollars bounty, dead or alive.
"Felnarl. Jeneora Rock. Descartes. Dankin."
There's a faint twitch in one of Seokmin's eyebrows. Seungcheol rolls his eyes, sarcastically muttering under his breath an addition of location names, "Voldoor, Inepril, December, Lewiston…" and Mingyu joins in on the fun with a cheerful, "New Miami!"
Seungkwan watches warily and your jaw clenches. You can feel your teeth grind together in annoyance as Wonwoo's smarmy sneer grows smugger.
"And now, Tonim Town. What?" he jeers, seizing the chance to use the man's silence as a way to ridicule him. "Don't recognize what you've laid waste to? Must I bring up the big ones to jog your memory a little, like the city of July and Augusta or the hole in the fifth moon?"
"Why you —"
Enragement propels you a step forward, but the barrel swinging your way halts your next move mid-step. The sullen look on Wonwoo's face surprisingly holds no malice. He looks saddened, if anything, but you can't bring yourself to feel too much sympathy with the rifle he's now pointed toward you.
"You forgot one."
"Pardon?"
Seokmin's voice is hardly more than a whisper yet it rings out loud and clear amid the tense silence and stillness. "I said, you forgot one. There's not a name of any place or person I'd ever forget. I'm well aware of the ones you're talking about… and more. However, there's somewhere I won't ever forget that no one will ever know existed."
"… Huh?"
"Little Ivywood."
Wonwoo seems so taken aback and the pause unwittingly allows your eyes to drift over to meet Seokmin's brown ones. There are so many emotions conveyed in the sidelong glance — a mixture of regret-filled feelings yet ever so soft — and it lasts a second too long to snap the befuddled aggressor out of his reverie.
"Oh… I see." He pushes up his glasses, the lenses glinting in the pale sunlight like a typical anime villain. The long gun lowers to the ground the same time as he throws back his head to let out a bitter laugh. "So that's how it is! All you do is take and take and take, Lee. Destroy, destroy, destroy; again and again and again!"
"Aye, ole chap's gone off his rocker."
"You've made an ally out of a would-be, should-be enemy and think other victims with their pain and grief don't exist?!"
"Wow," Seungkwan wrinkles his nose in disgust, "yeah… he's gone completely insane."
Mingyu hums in agreement. "A little unhinged! Off the rocks! Unstable even! When can I knock him out?"
You'd love to give the gentle giant the go-ahead. Really. But even so…
"Damn you —"
"Stop it."
The townspeople's uncertainty and hesitance tells you all you need to know, especially when Wonwoo's hysteria leaves them even more perplexed. After years of handling a gun like a second arm, you can spot inexperience and fear of handling a dangerous weapon the second someone is near one. You lower your arms and step forward once more, confidence growing when he makes no move to threaten you further.
"You don't want this."
The corner of his mouth quirks upward, a rueful smile. "You know, I thought we really did share some camaraderie."
"We do."
"Yet you gallivant around with a monster like that?"
"He's not a monster."
"I should've known better, really, when the VERnons said you're the sirocco that follows after the humanoid typhoon. Heroes, my ass! I don't get it, how could you do that to others after what happened to you?"
To us?
It remains unspoken yet you can hear the intent of the accusingly barbed question. Two survivors of a wrecked hometown. Shared camaraderie hadn't been a lie. Even now as you meet the flickering fire in Wonwoo's eyes with a blazing flame in your own, all you can see is a reflection of your past and what you could've turned into in a possible future.
A cold gleam returns to his gaze as he takes your silence as defiance. Or maybe even shamelessness. "How could you turn a blind eye to such a bloody warpath of destruction when you know too well of the tragedy that's left behind?!"
"Isn't that what you're doing?"
"… Excuse me?"
"That's what all of you are doing right now," you declare loudly and some of Tonim's residents whose conscience stings have the decency to avert their eyes. Awareness of their actions seem to weigh down on them, guns lowering ever the slightest and the awkwardness encourages Seungkwan to speak up.
"We would've left peacefully tomorrow."
"But yer actions're gonna be the very cause of the destruction yer tryin' so damn hard to prevent."
"Because you took a bribe!"
There's a stilted, horrified, and collective gasp, so you try to remedy Mingyu's exclamation.
"It's because you let your malice sway you. Tell me, Jeon. What all did you lose?"
"My whole town. Then my parents. Almost my life and nearly Lina's too. My lover…"
"And your sense of self. Plus, the new life you've created here — and those things? Almost lost because of your own accord. Why would you destroy the few good things you're granted?"
Wonwoo's eyebrows scrunch as his face tenses. Your heart goes out to him despite everything, hoping to get your point across as you continue speaking.
"That doesn't negate the losses. The grief. The pain. It never goes away but… you can choose to clean out the wound, put some salve on it, and bandage it or let it fester and infect your body 'til it rots even your soul."
You can hear the shift in the sand as Seokmin approaches to stand next to you. He regards Wonwoo with a kind smile and the understanding, crescent-shaped squint of his eyes is like a punch to the other man's gut.
"…. I —"
" — It's your choice, Jeon. What did they offer you? Money? There are so many bets on July's militia lying about the payout. I mean, c'mon, there's no way a ruined city would have the funds."
"Yer Plant's no longer in red status, so ya won't need to barter no more."
"I'll throw in a better deal — let us go and I'll have Choi marry you and Sherry, free of charge."
His cheeks flush and you inwardly gloat, instincts right on the money. Seungcheol's jaw drops, absolutely flabbergasted, and the townsfolk exchange a few knowing snickers.
"If it's protection you need, we can figure that out too," Seokmin recovers and offers in a low voice. "And if Do — er, Knives — or his gang approached you with a deal, just know that they never hold up their end of the bargain."
"You're lucky you threatened us first. DK's side is a little too slash-happy and trigger-loving to resort to verbal methods. They're the ones you'd want to go after anyways, you see, this man and Knives are twins if you don't look close enough, they're eerily similar at the strangest moments. So the real story is that it's all just spiraled out of control."
"You mean…"
"I won't deny responsibility." Seokmin admits sternly. "It's true that I've wreaked devastation to many towns. Failed to save the people I swore to protect."
"But DK keeps forcing his hand to get Seok to join his genocidal cause. And every time he refuses to do so, his brother throws a tantrum and well, knives go flying everywhere. Literally."
"He's a little…" The gunslinger searches for the right word — and finding that there is none — cringes. "Dramatic."
You stare at him, aghast. "He cut your arm off!"
Wonwoo pales, swallows, and then grimaces, daring to ask, "So… I've had it wrong the whole time?"
"I guess not entirely." You shrug, also guilty as charged years ago. "And obviously not the first."
"And certainly not the last," Seungkwan pipes up.
The bespectacled man looks down at the ground. "I don't… I don't know… Do I even deserve this kind of treatment? This… mercy?"
"No."
With such a blunt answer, Seokmin's quick to protest with an admonishment of your name while Seungkwan and Mingyu suppress smiles at your straightforwardness. Seungcheol freely chuckles, lighting a cigarette.
And Wonwoo's face falls as remorse hits all over again.
"But," you smirk, "what have I told you?"
"Oh, ah… why destroy the few good things life grants me?"
"Good. You were listening. We might get along just fine, after all." You send him a teasing wink. "Camaraderie and all that be damned."
A sheepish look overtakes the man's previously hardened features. And suddenly he's laughing with his head thrown back like earlier, but this time it's with an unrestrained amount of joy. Relief. Hope.
"The ticket to the future is always blank, Wonwoo." Seokmin extends a hand and the other man takes it, the small grin on his face turning into a full-blown smile.
"Guns down, Tonim town. The rest of you, come on out! Let's celebrate!" He calls out to everyone, gesturing for your group to follow. "Drinks are on me to make up for this whole mess. I'm sorry for getting you all involved."
You turn around toward Seokmin, elation written all over your face that he readily mirrors. Just as you're about to grab his hand as he reaches out at the same time, there's a slow, loud handclap that sets off mental warning sirens blaring all over again.
"Conflict resolution. How very touching."
The velvety voice is deceivingly sweet. But beneath the dulcet tones lies a raw and wicked strength. It rings out clearly, even more so when the jubilant mood abruptly dies down as a new figure approaches.
"Aw, c'mon Joshie! Just when it was gettin' good!" Soonyoung whines and you belatedly realize you forgot all about the real enemies at the entrance gate, thinking they had grown bored and left.
"What about that was 'getting good'?"
The Beast huffs at Jihoon's surly attitude, more than likely pouting beneath his mask. "Was really lookin' forward to those free drinks…"
"We don't need drinks and we don't need you, Josh."
If there's one commonality between the adversary and your group, it's the shared disdain for the elegant-looking man dressed in all black fabrics with shiny leather buckles, and slicked-back locks to match.
"Hm. But I think you do."
Chilling ochre-colored eyes couldn't be bothered to look at you, drifting past you and Seokmin like you were nothing more than the grains of sand littering every surface on Gunsmoke. And like a marionette, your head automatically swivels to follow his line of sight, blood draining from your face when you realize what he's looking at.
Lina.
She breaks away from holding onto Sheryl's hand after they emerge from the saloon, bounding toward her brother with excitement all over her face. The arm that isn't supporting his firearm extends gallantly outward, ready to welcome her with a hug as he strolls to meet her halfway.
They're smiling at one another with so much adoration after the intensity from earlier. If you weren't fucking terrified, you'd wish Dokyeom was also there to see how pure a sibling relationship and affection should be.
Instead, your stomach lurches, and Seokmin hisses beside you. With your back turned, you can't see Joshua but you're sure he's smirking when Wonwoo's frame stiffens, body jerking as it moves beyond his control.
Hastily, he's cocking the rifle with expert ease and assuming the perfect position to fire it, something he previously displayed no knowledge on before. Wide eyes have no choice but to peer down the scope and he chokes at how it's unforgivingly aimed directly at his little sister.
She skids to a halt, ten paces away. Hesitant. Wary. Puzzled.
"… Wonu?"
It all plays out in slow motion as you reach for Sirocco, simultaneously screaming out to your friends to alert them and provide cover. Frantic panic swirls in the air like a sandstorm at the turn of events, but even more fear generates when the townspeople can do nothing but helplessly succumb to their limbs moving on their own too.
Despite every single effort and all of his muscles straining not to do it, Wonwoo's pointer finger on the trigger pulls back. It doesn't matter how much he struggles to fight for control, his body refuses to listen. Tears flow from his eyes even though he can't speak, can't yell, can't beg for forgiveness — the vehement sense of horror is the only thing able to overpower Joshua's terrifying control, leaking out a salty excess.
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Three gunshots ring out at the same time. You fire right before Wonwoo does and Seokmin follows two seconds later. Not because his reaction time is slower. But because he could see and calculate where the bullet's headed after you changed its trajectory by shooting at Wonwoo's barrel.
It doesn't end there.
Seokmin is a half-step closer to Lina and can move at an inhumane speed, diving into a tuck-and-roll to reach her moments before the residents have no choice but to open fire too.
You know he's fast enough to dodge bullets at close range, but the staggered distance spread out among all of those present in the town's square works little for that insane advantage. Instead, the skilled combatant focuses all his attention on shielding Lina beneath the loose flaps of his impenetrable trench coat. She clings tightly to his leg, whimpering.
"Don't worry, I'll protect you."
Continuing to mutter reassurances, he pats her fluffy brown hair with an unshaking cybernetic palm while the other rapidly points his revolver upwards to deflect a bullet that might've been lucky enough to shatter the bridge of his glasses. Then doing the same to one at five o'clock on his right. He angles his body this way and that as if a puppeteer is yanking the strings connected to his limbs to the perverse beat of an unheard tune. The few he misses land harmlessly against the thick kevlar material you're all wearing.
Meanwhile, your steady hand supports the familiar weight of Sirocco. Muscle memory aids you with cocking the gun as you run. Aiming at the closest group of people near them and then — bang!, bang!, bang! — snipe off the barrels on their guns in rapid succession, rendering them useless.
From behind, something flies past your face and nicks the top of your ear — one of the few places unprotected by bulletproof material — causing you to hiss. Scowling over your shoulder, you squint in the direction it came from.
While a complete bastard, Seungcheol is also the most resourceful ray of hope in a shootout like this. The Punisher's automatic artillery relentlessly fires shot after shot, destroying old and weather-beaten guns like they're empty, crushable soda cans. It's faster too. The trigger-happy pastor twirls it around maniacally, taking only the slightest care to not actually kill anyone.
You're a hundred percent sure it's because of Joshua's disturbing power that allows him to reanimate corpses rather than Seokmin's "Thou shalt not kill" lecture and pacifist philosophies that keeps the supposed 'god-fearing' man from snuffing out anyone's life this time around. Despite the bullets whizzing around, you know he'll fare alright with that healing serum of his — just as long as he doesn't overdose on it.
Mingyu rushes over to stand back-to-back with the pastor, x-shaped claws firing out of his 'stun-gun' and immobilizing many of his targets with ease. You can't help but grimace though, wondering if they'll sustain more brain damage from Joshua's nefarious telepathy or a well-meaning concussion that leaves them unconscious and no longer posing a threat. A solid steel object flies past the brown-haired man's head, knocking down the mind-controlled person who was trying to sneak up on him using a blind spot.
"Ooh, thanks, Seungkwan!"
"Pay attention, you blockhead!"
An empty derringer lays at said blockhead's feet and Mingyu kicks it away with a childlike glee. A brand-new loaded pistol is already in Seungkwan's right hand even as he throws away the one in his left toward someone approaching Seungcheol. The young man's never empty-handed for long because with another flashy twirl from out of his cloak and a new handgun is cocked, aimed, and fired.
Despite the distance and conditions, all three work together like clockwork. Different shaped and sized cogs all interconnected to succeed without causing too much harm. And you know you must play your part as well, turning your attention back to the few townsfolk that remain.
"Seokmin, switch!"
It's not like he needs the heads-up. The way you'd both been inching closer to each other every time your gun's fired already issued the forewarning. It's like a subtle tango performed by two fierce allies surrounded by deadly enemies. If you didn't know better, it's similar to an intricate sword dance.
But you knew how dangerous it was to play with knives.
The swift transfer of Lina's warm little body into your arms is a welcome comfort. Seokmin sends you a dazzling smile, one full of confidence at a successful swap.
"Hey there, pretty girl," you coo and your gloved thumb wipes away one of the tear trails cutting through the dirt smudges on her face. "You are so, so, so brave and I'm so, so, so proud of you."
"He," she sniffles, "my… my… br-brother. W-Wonu!"
Pressing a kiss to her forehead, you turn her to face the other way. "Everything's going to fine. I promise. Now, run to Seungcheol. He'll keep you safe while the rest of us finish this."
Seungkwan and Mingyu had effectively disarmed everyone on their end and now worked on dragging the town's unconscious residents inside the saloon and attending to any wounds. The pastor stood guard near the entrance with his Punisher staked firmly into the sandy ground. Although empty of ammunition, the machine gun still served a purpose as a great defender with its imposing cross shape.
With the target assuredly safe — out of sight, out of mind — the control Joshua has over those remaining falters and starts to lose its effect. In the brief lull, Seokmin dashes ahead to deliver a flying kick that helpfully unsheathes the dagger hidden in the sole of his boots, demolishing one more firearm in someone's grip before it can be used again.
Bang!
Bang!
And with Sirocco's precision, the last two are destroyed as well. You match your comrade's grin and turn triumphantly to where the instigators still stand at the entrance.
There would be no casualties today. You and your comrades would make sure of that.
Joshua, stoic as ever, surveys the aftermath with an air of unbothered gracefulness. Jihoon fumes next to him. Panic spikes when Soonyoung can't be spotted at first until you spy him curled up in the car's front seat — asleep.
You fist bump Seokmin in high spirits. Then fearlessly meet a pair of deep orange eyes devoid of any emotion or warmth, a shift occurs in your smile. Confidence and satisfaction hone the corners of your mouth into a daring smirk and something about the bold taunt causes a rare flicker of humor to cross Joshua's lips. Whether it's scornful pity or simple mockery, you don't have time to figure it out because Jihoon snaps.
Nails.
Several of them fly through the air and their wielder's formidable namesake comes from the daunting color that makes the multitude of piercers look like thin streaks of blood against the pale blue sky. The spikes as long as spears are all fired from Jihoon's large suitcase-turned-crossbow that aims just shy of your left side.
Those steel eyes of his are as sharp as their color. The malice within them feels suffocating, so strong and heavy that it sucks all the breath straight out of your lungs. Only the pain from a nail grazing your cheek is enough to pull your attention away from drowning in the unnerving emotion and you put a hand up to the laceration to soothe the sting.
Wetness oozes from your skin, an unsettling feeling of sliminess accompanying the touch. Puzzled, your fingers retract and you ponder the sheer amount of red viscoelastic fluid coating them. There's so much of it pooling that droplets fall to the sand below while others dribble down past your wrist and under your sleeve, the stain blending right in with the fabric of your coat.
Drip.
"It's all your fault!"
Drip.
"Their blood is on your hands…"
Drip.
"Don't you feel guilty?"
Drip.
"Don't you feel responsible?"
Drip.
"Do you regret being the only one left to live?"
Drip.
Faces you know and voices you cannot recall overlap and echo. Unfamiliar frowning expressions and intonations you remember as once gentle now ridicule, belittle, and find every crack in your well-made armor. Insidious whispers weave inside, entangling themselves within the fragile support structures of your mind and very soul. They point and cackle to one another at such a sorry sight, only for you to realize you're angrily jabbing a pointer finger at your worthless reflection with those cursory words coming straight out of your own mouth.
Drip.
Your head turns robotically, like an early prototype of the lost technology Earthlings created. This time it's Sheryl who's the victim, helplessly well within the trajectory line of Jihoon's rage. Every muscle aches, weighed down by exhaustion. Your shoulder burns. Yet you still somehow find the strength within you to rush toward her, especially hearing Lina's desperate wail as she's held back by a grimacing Seungcheol.
Drip.
Like a comet, Seokmin blazes past. He skids to a stop, effectively shielding the woman right before impact. You're too slow to move. In fact, it feels like an out-of-body experience. As if you're nothing but a hologram inside the floating ship — an artificial intelligence projection with no other choice but to witness the horrors and observe tangible objects scuttle towards their inevitable doom without interference. You're left with no choice but to simply watch as the nails are propelled through the air with the intent to strike.
Drip.
Someone's screaming. Maybe it's you.
Drip.
The nails impale Seokmin without mercy. Strike after strike, they pierce straight through the material of his coat designed to repel only bullets and plunge deep within the muscles beneath his skin. One after the other. So many of them stick out of the man's backside like the skeletal bone formation for wings. He slumps to his knees, falling on top of a bewildered but unharmed Sheryl. When he only lays still with no further action, you're struck with the dreadful knowledge that he may never move again and it fills you with an unfathomable maelstrom of raw grief and anger.
Drip.
Suddenly, you're no longer drowning in invisible quicksand and can move freely again. There's zero hesitation in your now fluid movements — not even when the blond-haired man poises his crossbow directly at you this time. Pulling out the spare gun hidden near your hip, you blast the airborne spikes flying towards you without hesitation.
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
More fall than you shoot. The anger, pain, and grief you wield is enough to tear them apart like they're nothing but worm larvae helplessly caught in a sandstorm. You stalk forward through the crimson ire that relentlessly strikes down, clearing a path that's littered with broken, twisted, and dented nails before resolutely aiming point-blank at Jihoon's forehead.
Click.
More people are screaming and the spiteful cacophony in your mind resumes. But your ears feel like they're filled with cotton and this time you're stuck underwater. Your chest rises and falls, trying and failing to collect yourself.
"… out of it!"
"Hyperventialing -"
"Goddamn it! Get ahold o'yerself, woman!"
The Crimsonnail sneers.
Your cheek stings.
The dissonance reminds you of the wound from before. But this time it feels like a sting, as if someone slapped you — albeit rather gently. Numb, you halt in place and cautiously raise your hand back to your surprisingly unmarred face. But rather than skin, you grasp onto something solid. Something familiar. Something kind. Something loving. Something safe. Something warm. Something that's yours — always has been and always will be.
Someone.
And then… you open your eyes — and find yourself staring directly into Seokmin's sparkling brown ones.
"Y-you're dead," you manage to choke out in disbelief and his eyes incredulously crinkle into half-moons at the statement to hide the tears brimming in them.
The soothing hand caressing your cheek moves to wrap around the barrel of the gun you're pressing to his forehead and he smiles disarmingly. As if what you just said was the funniest thing ever.
"I know, mayfly."
Part 2 | Read the whole thing on AO3
onlyseokmins: April 2024 ©
#ez.creates#svthub#svt.smut#dokyeom smut#dk smut#seokmin smut#lee seokmin smut#svt smut#seventeen smut#kpop smut#trigun au#svt au#seventeen au
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Vaggie and Valentino are connected and no one has been talking about it (I think 😭)
Brutha. I've always known this but like these two are surface level similar yet so SO SO SOOOO different its terrifying.
Question might be, why tf am I comparing the r*pist and the beautiful, gorgeous, fantastic, inspiring, humble, generous, smeggsy, former angel?
Simply because they are both moth demon's that speak Spanish. It's a bit too specific. And rlly that's kind of all I have right now. Sure, you could say "erm actually, Vaggie isn't a moth demon 🤓" and ur probably right. But if she's not, why is it that in her redesign for the show they lean into the moth hair? It's look much MUCH more moth than in the pilot. So if Viv wanted to stray away from the moth theme, why make it look more like that? She may not he exactly a moth demon but she does have intentional moth features. Perhaps Vaggie just disguised herself like that, either way, still a connection..
I would get it if one of them were in helluva boss jst as a way to recycle and make room or whatever. But no, they are in the same show, same world, same ring of hell, same city(I think). It's a weird connection and I kind of don't want it to exist. Like at all. Because if they are connected I can't think of any other way they are except that Val could be a fallen angel. Which I CANT imagine. Unless Vaggie is like, a winner that became an exterminator, but genuinely that would be a bit complex. But what isn't in this show. Then again, Adam said he created her, or that could be a metaphor for that Vaggie was never noticed as a human and just brushed off to the side so therefore Adam "created" her (created a name and image/status of her). But that's unlikely, I don't they would be that smart lmao.
Personality wise, they both have anger issues. Pilot Vaggie and show Valentino are more alike but show Vaggie is still somewhat spicy. They also both have hot voices, sorry not sorry, like fuck Val (not literally) but his voice is BAZINGA 😍 and I'm a simp for Stephanie Beatriz. I'm a simple gal.
Design wise they have rare commonalities. They are both heavily red but thats everyone in the show it make my eyes bleed. But. A weird thing someone pointed out in a slideshow on tiktok is that show Valentino has white stripes on his hips. Me personally I'm not sure what to think about it really. Like I mean it IS a new detail that spawned AFTER the pilot and it is like... on the EXACT place. But like, it's such a weird thing to include when it's such a common pose yknow?
Also the X's on the boobs are so sensual I cannot be the only one. And ykno Val is the king of sensual (🤮)
Maybe you could be asking, "if Val and Vaggie r connected jst because they are moth demons then that jst means that anyone that are the same species are somehow tied to eachother huh? 🤓" like Angel Dust and Zestial. But what I think differs from that is the fact these two have actual big similarities apart from jst the fact they are moths. Like what I just explained, personality, design, both speak Spanish. While Angel Dust and Zestial are only just both spiders. Angel's reason for being a spider is due to the ykno, "web of crime" thing. And Zesty man? Idk he probably got bit and fucking died by a poisonous spider. I mean, health shit wasn't exactly great back in his ye olde time.
For Val and Vaggie we have NO idea why they are moths
But I did find this! From google AI.....? (I didn't even know that was a thing..) but, I think it's true. It explains the dynamic with Angel alot and I think that's an interesting detail.
Which could also apply to Vaggie because of her hyper-dependency on Charlie.
Plus this fits Vaggie so. SO much. If my theory that Vaggie just disguised herself as a moth to blend in then that would be a good connection to the entire moth motif. Love, I don't even need to explain.
It can fit Val too if you think abt the disguise part a bit. Like he disguises himself as this charming and calming figure to avoid suspicion and lure victims... fucking creepy 🤮
Also in Vaggie's past designs she was more moth.
Here is like. ONE image I could find that wasn't too blurry. Like I wouldn't say it's heavy moth but I think if you asked me what insect she was based off I would guess moth in like a few minutes. The colors being dark, the fluffy legwarmers. Yum, that's a mothy. (THIS DESIGN YHO KINDA PISSES ME OFF. WHY IS THERE THE FEMALE SIGN OK HER SHIRY I THOUGHT SHE WAS STRAIGHT IN THIS VER??? also str8 vaggie scares me don't ever bring up that thing around me. They are NOT the same. #notmyvagina)
From what I know there aren't any previous old beta designs of Valentino, so he was likely made for the show specifically.
Overall, they are both sexy Spanish speakers who are moth demons, in the same show, oddly specific connected design choices, and have some anger issues.
Oh also they both hate Angel Dust 💜
#hazbin hotel#hazbin#hazbin hotel angel dust#hazbin hotel valentino#hazbin hotel vox#hazbin hotel vaggie#hazbin vaggie#vaggatha#vaggie#hazbin hotel vagatha#hazbin vagatha#valentino#valentino hazbin hotel#hazbin valentino#hazbin hotel the vees#hazbin hotel theory#hazbin thoughts#hazbin theory#hazbin the vees#hazbin hotel charlie#hazbin lucifer#hazbin hotel the radio demon#i kind of dont like this theory but UGH its such a weird thing?? like its such specific details that connect them i hate it.#and ive always been side eyeing them like. wtf r u two?? why r u a bit too similar. i hate that. stop.#but like yea thats it. i want it to not be true. cz what of Val is actually Vaggie's dad. another one added to the daddy issues club uggh 😒#chaggie#rainbowmoth#charlie morningstar#charlie hazbin hotel#varlie
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cringetober day 16!! i know i just posted mesmerizer lost media yesterday but i've been planning this for a good bit lol
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☢️ radithorisms Follow
so 2024's the year of lostwave right? so many songs have been found this year alone n shit. and with stacy being found i feel like i should be open about something.
okay so like. there's this one song i listened to in 2010 that i feel like was intensely formative to my teenage years. and i can't find it. TRUST ME i tried but it's just not there. it's like it never existed. and it sucks cause despite the contents of the song, it comforted me through the darkest moments of my life. and jt always found me. so why can't i find it.
oh right i need to give you guys info on the song, right?
so i don't really remember much about the lyrics, mainly cause it (the song's named mesmerizer btw) wasn't translated when i saw it BUT i remember the music video.
so the music video is about miku and teto (did i mention they sang the song??? im sorry this is so disorganized lol) in this like. kids show environment?? they're dancing n shit in Mysterious Plains it's weird. anyways the ENTIRE TIME teto's been making signs for help, from ASL to morse code. yeah that's meant to imply they are kidnapped. so there's this segment where they get like. hypnotized??? miku's eyes fade to black and teto's ALMOST do but then they cut away. then everything SEEMS normal but miku's limbs start being funny and it's probably a sign of the hypnosis or something and teto's freaking out a bit and then... i.... i forgot the final fucking chorus it's so over.
oh and they wore these costumes - i drew em from memory
👩❤️💋👩 yurisoldierno39 Follow
miranda my beloved mutual miranda. where the fuck is neru
☢️ radithorisms Follow
you say that as a bit but people did joke about neru being in the song. it got unfunny fast though
👩❤️💋👩 yurisoldierno39 Follow
oh damn. i don't think i know what ur talking abt though. sad!
🔔 the-bellssss Follow
hey wait wasn't mesmerizer that one song that made a guy careen off a cliff cause he listened to it and it fogged his brain up so bad he didn't pay attention to the road?
☢️ radithorisms Follow
what
#no that cant be it helped me it helped me it helped me it
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☢️ radithorisms Follow
update on the mesmerizer situation
so i've been heeding some of your advice, i've been looking on niconico and i found a clip!!! lets gooo
i feel like it's finally coming around now. it's coming back to me. it's warm embrace hugging me. it's gonna be alright. i think.
#mesmerizer #lostwave #lost media #i cant help but feel like it's egging me on tho
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👩❤️💋👩 yurisoldierno39 Follow
man i love miranda n all but she's been talking about nothing but that mesmerizer song ever since she found that clip.
#it's so hard to talk to her man #like i get it the song is important to you but #i feel like you care more about it than me :/
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👩❤️💋👩 yurisoldierno39 Follow
☢️ radithorisms asked:
i saw your post, tammy. it's sad you think of it like that. you'll see the light soon though, my love.
im sure of it
YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN??
#wait. #''love''? 😳
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🔔 the-bellssss Follow
the fuck is going on with my mutuals man
👩❤️💋👩 yurisoldierno39 Follow
miranda sent me a cryptic ask where she called me love
🔔 the-bellssss Follow
good 4 u??? love wins i guess
👩❤️💋👩 yurisoldierno39 Follow
love wins
🔔 the-bellssss Follow
love wins
☢️ radithorisms Follow
love wins
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i found it i found it ifounditifound it i found it idounfitifounditiFOUNDITIFUONDITIFOHNDITOUFODUNITJFOUNDITIFOUNITIFOUNDITIFKJNFIFOUNFITIFKUNGIT
👩❤️💋👩 yurisoldierno39 Follow
are you ok?? answer my text
🔔 the-bellssss Follow
tammy and miranda have both been awfully silent...
👩❤️💋👩 yurisoldierno39 Follow
hey nell!! i just came back from talking to miranda. positive she's just doing a bit.
🔔 the-bellssss Follow
oh shit hey tammy
👩❤️💋👩 yurisoldierno39 Follow
can you watch this for me? thx
🔔 the-bellssss Follow
okay...?
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☢️ radithorisms Follow
i remember the final chorus now.
mid-lyric, something snaps within miku. her eyes go into a pitch black, her mouth eternally agape, a tongue sticking out, and she's stuck doing the same jerky movements. she's mesmerized, whatever was left in her gone forever. teto's horrified, grieving even, miku might as well be dead after all. but i never cared about what was happening on the sides of the screen. i was transfixed by what was on the center. the infamous 13-sided star literally EVERYWHERE in the music video unveiled itself to be a spiral. and i couldn't keep my eyes off it. the overstimulation of the song all melting together, telling me to let go, give in, fall into the rhythm, the beat, the instruments, the vocals.... i guess all those replays must have conditioned me.
it's all ok now though.
everything will be.
i just need to let her see.
i found the video after all. what's love for if you keep them away from the light? i'll see you soon, tammy. <3
#jade.txt#mesmerizer#mesmerizer lost media#unreality#creepypasta#fakepost#fake post#ill make a longer vers n put it up on ao3 one day
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favorite fan — a triple s sohyun fanfic
image cr: pinterest
synopsis: you've always been a wav, since you can remeber and you've always had a huge crush on your bias, park sohyun, since you can remember
warning: im still a baby wav! so i don't know much about triple s and etc, still learning. but i saw there is only one fic abt sohyun here so i had to step up ♡♡ also, english is not my first language !!!! pls correct me if i type anything wrong !!!! thank youu ♡♡♡
dinamics: triple s idol sohyun x cute fan f!reader
info: so so much fluff and cute interactions + a little suggestive
start reading here:
you think you've never been that cheerful in your life, you're a fan of triple s since their debut and now you're gonna watch their first ever tour! isn't that cool? you lost a bit of your enthusiasm while waiting on the line tho, but you were happy your favorite group had so many fans supporting them. the stadium is full of people and you make sure that you ran enough to get a place close enough to see sohyun live well. you don't say it out loud, you think people are gonna find weird, even your friends, but you are romanticaly obsessed with sohyun. c'mon, who isn't !? but you're not obsessed in a weird way, you just love her so much and wants her to be so happy even if it's not if you. cause she would never choose a silly 18 years old to date, right? you didn't even know if she likes girls and you don't like assuming people's sexualities. while you distract yourself thinking how gorgeous she will be live, the concert starts. the intro was awesome! all 24 girls sing incredibly well live, and dance and rap well and of course are sooooo pretty. you can't take your eyes of sohyun, as always, and you didn't notice, but she noticed you, the only fan that was not recording. you know you're gonna miss the videos later but you want to enjoy the view without caring about camera angles. as you scream for her, she thinks you're just so cute. she also thinks you have such a beautiful smile and pretty makeup with a lot of blush, that makes you even cuter. she loved to know that you exist. the entire concert was amazing, and of course you used all your family's money to go on every single one of the concerts that tour, you're not rich, but your grandparents are, and sometimes the right thing is just taking advantage of that! ypu had so much fun in each one of them, even if they all had the same tracklist. and, can't skip that little fact: in the middle of the tour sohyun started interacting with you, she was always near you and talking to you and even asked for your phone to record a little, you were just soooo happy, the happiest you ever been. months have gone by and you still re watch that video everyday, especially today! after many tries and albums you got it, you're going to a fansign of the queens. it's just so fun talking to them, you just finished your 2 minutes with kotone and xinyu, almost the last members, but the last one was actually sohyun, you move to her space very nervous, you gulp.
"hello" she says, not looking at you yet. "wait, it's you! what's your name, darling?"
"hm, hello. it's y-y/n"
"eyyy, you were not that nervous with other members" she jokes and smiles. oh, that smile, you were hypnotized by it.
she gets your album, signs and draws or writes something else, whathever, her looks and sweetness with you are more important now.
"so, y/n, tell me a lil more about you" she asks flirty while taking your hands and massaging them. you look at her hands in yours and think you need to be brave, you only have this chance to talk to her and cause a good impression
"im 18 years old, i like to dye my hair, also bows and bunnies and cute things in gerenal and of course i love triple s" you're a little awkward, but you hear her saying "cute" in a low volume and laughing.
"it'll be little bunny then" she smirks
"hm?" you're lost in confusion
"you're nickname! think of one for me too!" why is she so flirty with you? you try to forget that, you're probably being too delulu. she must be like that with everybody
"your time is over" the staff says, being a little too harsh with you for sohyun's taste
while leaving, you can hear her saying "don't talk like that to her, she's such a good girl" and that made you so happy you almost screamed, but had to hold it in.
when you got home you remembered the sign, you were there for it! when you open your album on sohyun's page you have a surprise, a little text and a phone number. it says "love, you really like me, right? please send me a text soon! i'll be waiting, i trust in you, i'm sure you'll never share my number with anyone xx xxxx-xxxx"
you won't lie, you cry a little, keep looking at the paper thinking "how the fuck is that real?" and suddently "what if it's not real!?" then you remembered, she was waiting for you. you pick your phone on the maximum speed you can and type sohyun's number. add to contacts, talk to.
"hello!" you say
"hi! who is it?" she says
"it's y/n 🥺🥺 is this the right number 🥺🥺" you felt a little awkward
"little bunnyy" ok, it must be her
"you though on a nickname for me?"
"i like to call you sohy unnie"
"cute ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ"
"as expected from my little bunny"
hers? hers little bunny? you've never been hapier, laying on your bed, kicking your feet, because THE PARK SOHYUN called you her little bunny. you want to be hers so bad.
"yah, don't stop talking to me" she's a little possessive too?? oh my god! when will you two marry?
"im here, don't worry" you never know what to say around her, you get your favorite juice to make everything the most confortable the possible
"i can't be mad at you! cutie!"
"do you happen to want to go on a date with me?" you spill your juice.
PART 2 SOON ! THANKS FOR READING TILL THE END LOVE YOUU ♡♡
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Here are my first thoughts on @hateweasel 's cielois fanfic DLTD, as I share them like 100+ chapters into the journey with my best friend (who hasn't read DLTD nor was ever really into Kuro) trough DMs. Here recapped for y'all.
- I FORGOT!! I DIDN'T KNOW HATE'S PRONOUNS AT THE BEGINNING SO WHEN I SPOKE WITH MY BEST FRIEND (In Italian, where they/them pronouns don't really exists unfortunately) I ALWAYS TRIED TO GET AROUND USING PRONOUNS SO AS NOT TO MISGENDER HER!! At some point (this time on ff.net, bc I usually read on ao3 so that's where I read DLTD first) I read on an author's corner the she/her pronouns and sent an ask to Hate (probably on anon bc that's how I was at first) to confirm and from then on I was finally able to get it together when talking about Hate.
-Hey Hate, remember when I sent you that anon ask talking abt how you reminded me of a French cartoon and you IMMEDIATELY recognized it as Code Lyoko? Yeah related to that whole "school thinks they're adoptive sibling" thing, I wondered why no one at school had questions about why the fuck the supposed siblings had that much non-platonic tension.
-My initial criticism that wasn't actually criticism on Hate bc I knew this was from 10 years ago and i honestly just read it as how teenage boys, especially at the time, behaved. It was criticism to just the boys, not the author. Criticism include:
1)the gay slurs the cast kept throwing around.
2)The way they all said that one in the Cielois was the "woman" - wich is something both homophobic and misogynistic.
3) the "yOuR'E sUcH a GIrL" insult that is, again, misogynistic.
4) Not a criticism to the teenage boys this time but to the girls. WHY are y'all sexualizing these gays?? GET A GRIP!!
-Not a criticism, but since we're talking about their teenager boy behavior that Hate got SO RIGHT: the COSTANT sex jokes related conversation they had. It didn't really bother me so its not criticism, its just very hormonal teen boy minded to bring everything back to that? So I wasn't really annoyed at the teenagers for being teenagers u know. I'm just adding it to the list of what I thought Hate got so well in the characterization of teenager boys.
-at some point my best friend lead me to realize that while everyone in school felt the tension between Cielois, no one had the bets running on when/if they would finally get together. Wich still makes me so sad because HATE, you missed on such a romance fanfic trope 😔 /jk
- Me at the start of the stadium arc when Kris starts being interested in...what the frick was his name?? Cameron?? Idk THAT ONE BLONDE DUDE: Oh so we're gonna have a couple of chill chapters where they are just gonna establish their relationships better!
Me, when the reapers are there and we discover about the bomb: W H A T
-Me: DLTD Suddently became Ouran Host Club? For?? Some reason??
My friend: You know what? It doesn't really surprise me. Imo this story will cover every work of literature ever existed before it ends.
-Mi initial dislike for the name Kristopherson. I still don't really like it but I'm used to it ig? Again no hate to Hate!! I just find it such an unnecessarily long name for his parents to give him? Like choose Kristopher, or Kris, why Kristopherson?? Now I know it's bc Kristopher is his father. And in general i understand that Rich People are Like That TM.
Me, while I was describing Kris's journey of self discovery to my best friend: At the beginning of the story, he was just this random bully who called Alois gay...wich i mean, it was true, but he didn't HAVE to be so mean about it...
Gonna cut this into parts so I don't kill my followers who aren't interested in my DLTD thoughts..i would use the read more thing but idk how to activate that?? Also I wrote this for some time now and I need a break lol
#that cielois fic thats longer than the bible#DLTD#i unironically kinda want to reread the fanfic now no joke#DLTD Thoughts
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If you have the energy I’d like to hear you talk abt what you value in atheism as a belief system! (This is meant positively I’m just bad at Words, if the question puts you on the spot then no pressure to answer!)
Hello!! Yes!
I think "belief system" is maybe the wrong word- imo, a big part of what makes atheism what it is is that there isn't any kind of organization, there's no system, and the only "requirements" are... well, ultimately just that you call yourself an atheist.
I've seen a ton of different ways to define the word, and a ton of different people call themselves that- or something else- for different reasons; my point just being that it's a really diverse, really complex label, and ultimately I think it works about the same way queer identity labels do: you decide if it applies to you, and if you decide it does, then it does! There's nobody to tell you whether you're right or wrong about that; that's sort of the whole point.
I grew up atheist, and aside from a couple of edge cases I learned about in my 20's, my known extended family is entirely non-religious. I say "three generations of atheists" because I recall one great-grandma who had some angel-related paraphernalia and I don't really remember her deal about it, and because "atheist" is a close enough shorthand; some of my family would probably rather describe themselves as "agnostic", but their reasoning, when I've asked, is largely that they think "atheist" means "anti-theist".
I also say that because my experience in learning about religion has been... kind of unique. I live in an area that is 60% non-religious; I think a good amount of that is that people who grew up with some Christian influence in their life decided not to pursue it themselves. Still, it's not super common to talk about religion here, and religious influences- while they still very much exist- aren't really named for what they are.
What that means is, essentially, that I absorbed a lot of values and ideas as a kind that came completely detached from any reasoning. And I'm a painfully introspective (read: anxious) person; I spent a lot of time reflecting on those values from a very young age, and I was encouraged to do so, in many ways, by the adults around me.
I distinctly remember being about 10 years old, in a car with my mom and stepdad, and wondering about why people Did Good Things. Was it selfish- because it made them feel good? What motivation was there to be charitable and generous, if not for some kind of reward? I knew I wanted to do good, and I knew that part of that was internal satisfaction, but that didn't feel right as an answer. I decided later that this was a function of human nature, to help each other- and even if it was an evolutionary community-building thing, doing good was also a way of building a happy, sustainable life with full and healthy relationships.
I have never understood the "what is the purpose of life?" question- it's been pretty obvious to me from a young age that there isn't one, and there doesn't need to be. We weren't "put on the planet" in the first place. We're here because of a beautiful string of semi-random events, and we get to decide what to do with the opportunities and hardships that comes with.
When I was 12, I decided, on a walk home from school, that my "goal" in life was going to be to be the best person I possibly could. I have spent a lot of time since then working out what that really means; along the way, I realized that in order to do this, I also needed to be a happy person. I needed to heal and grow and live a sustainable life, and I needed to value myself and my inherent worth.
This is a lot of rambling to say, essentially: I think atheism means different things to different people, but I think the idea that it's some kind of void of experience and value is plainly ignorant and genuinely damaging.
This is just a snapshot of the ways in which I currently recognize atheism to have influenced my life, and there's a lot more I could touch on as well! But the idea that we choose what's important is core to a lot of atheism, I think; and there is a genuinely beautiful value system that follows from this.
I choose what's important to me, and others choose the same for themselves. I choose my goals and "purpose", and others do the same for themselves. In a lot of ways, that heterogeneity is part of what makes communities work: understanding and appreciating differences in value systems and worldviews means including more and more of what each individual has to offer.
None of this is exclusive or universal to atheism (and again, the label itself is pretty broad depending on who you talk to) but it's an example of the ideas that can follow from certain questions pretty inherent to the idea that there isn't a higher power.
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Lore dump about your ninjago ocs to me
EHEHEHEHEEH THE CAN OF WORMS YOU HAVE JUST OPENED
Ok so they’ve all got weird parental issues (I’m not projecting you are) in wildly different ways that affected them all differently.
So I’ve talked a shit ton about Toni, so y’all should know almost everything after S5? But I can talk abt their childhood and stuff. They had a lot of time where she was just like. Being an asshole to everyone they knew in a sad attempt to get attention from their parents, so knows his way around the city pretty well. He got nabbed by a restaurant owner who was like ‘STOP trying to get the cops called on yourself. Sweep my floors.’ And he did for a while, found her love for reporting, had a found family who actually cared for them and kinda finally realized that her parents weren’t really worth the effort anymore. Restaurant owner/stand in mom ended up dying during the Great Devourer incident. So uh. Yeah. Everything after that is just. Business as usual.
Charlie. Ohhhhhihhohihoohhoh boy. Her dad died when she was reaaaalllyyyy young, she was raised by her mom and grandmother who were super unwell in the brain. The Great Devourer incident happened when she was 13, her mother and grandmother both died (celebration time) and she spent days digging herself out of the rubble only to find out that everyone kind of. Gave up on her. And forgot about her. And idk I like to think they made some sort of memorial after that, and Charlie found her name on the memorial and was like ‘wow. Really cool /s. They think I’m dead. And didn’t bother looking for me. Awesome.’ And becomes bitter (justifiably) but decides that it’s going to be everyone else’s problem. She joined the Sons Of Garmadon, but kind of dipped out after Garmadon was actually resurrected, and just spends. All of her time trying to make people miserable. Because she sucks.
Kit is. Certainly something. Ran away from home (Geathal) as a teenager because of a fight with their parents, ended up trying to go back home as an adult (Geathal was destroyed it no longer exists) and ended up in Ninjago. Through a wild series of mishaps and misunderstandings, they had the element of light given to them and just having the WORST goddamn time dealing with that and the confusion of WHERE the fuck they are and HOW the fuck to leave. So Kit is just having. The worst ever time.
This is the lineup of them. The ages are S8 relevant, I doooooo need to tweak Kit’s. They r older.
#ninjago#lego ninjago#ninjago oc#ninjago ocs#lego ninjago oc#lego ninjago ocs#mason ocs#mason draws#mason posts#oc: toni hayes#oc: charlie#oc: kit
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hey chat, i created One Million Brand New Ocs
and i wanna introduce em all :D
this is aria, she's a flippin murderer and she uses a sword,,,so silly abt it. she isnt related to any sort of dark magic, she just likes killing and thinks swords are cool.
this is beau, he's a train conductor who has grown paranoid and distanced himself from friends and familyy and it ruins all his relationshipss s because he thinks everyone secretly wants him DEAD
this is klai, he's been cursed with dark magic,,,and one of the symptoms is feeling horrible when hes actually fine, and feeling fine when he isnt. never did anything to deserve this curse. just at the wrong place, at the wrong time...
this is umbra. due to the suspicious disappearances that r going on, she stepped up to defend those she cares about. after all, if she doesn't, nobody else will. (more on that later)
this is regaethus, a guardian angel who SUCKS AT THEIR JOB. hiding their face out of shame. dark magic users keep exploiting their weaknesses, leaving the mortals to fend for themselves and their loved ones (umbra!!!)
this is jürgen. he got into a terrible "accident" which kept her from doing the things she loves. this is related to another character, but i wont name names!!! ^^ this guys pretty barebones, so send me asks abt him because i needa develop her more
this guys bleu. they were another unfortunate victim, and their friend became the first to find out. when they were alive, they were nice to hangout with, and their calm demeanor contrasted with the rest of their friends.
this is grün. he's a con artist who only does it because it's just. what he's good at. not too proud of it, but his kids need him. too bad aria got sick of his plotting and slashed him..
this is allae! by far my fav., she was also cursed with dark magic, but she doesn't mind it as much because she has chronic migraines. if anything, the curse lessens the pain, so she's generally alright with the curse. this does mean she fails to notice if she's in actual danger.
this is lemmy. they are a homunculus, and they broke out of the shed they were created in. immediately went on a rampage, causing multiple car wrecks and leaving destruction in their wake. of course, it is only in their nature to do these things. but they shouldn't have been given life at all. for their own sake.
this is arethiel. they were once a normal citizen, before being chosen to become a guardian angel (since the existing ones are too weak). theyre confused as HELL, but they try making it work. they have sea angel wings, u cant see in this image but theyre there. they werent there when arethiel was chosen tho..
this is grace. she was attacked in her own apartment and left to bleed out. i dont have much info abt her,,,
this is april. with all the murders happening, she has to pretend to be worried, so people dont suspect her of anything. she comes off as mindful and well read, but it's a façade to cover up her violent tendencies
this is yumi. she's also very silly, good friends with aria! also a crazy ass mf. she;s surprisingly intimidating, despite her general demeanor and i guess...her aesthetic .sure. anyhow, she also has a snake tail! u cant see it in this image but its there
theres a bunch of other ones, but i'll end this post here. hope you enjoyed!! please, feel free to ask questions!!
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I need to know more about Michael's mom... Is she a cool mom?
SHE IS A VERY COOL MOM janet afton you will always be famous. to me
Im taking this as a chance to finally ramble abt her anyways so Janet's core inspo when designing her was to avoid 2 key things. Don't make her like Immortal & Th Restless's Clara (due to clara representing michael, not mrs afton, so i wanted to avoid that), and don't base her too heavily off of Ballora. I still have ties to Ballora's character (a music-based theme, blue-centric colour palette, im sure there were more basic ideas but everything else is more hc than themes to keep up) due to my hc thingy of each Funtime having ties to William's wife + kids, but yknow.
But yeah. Funky lady who played bass guitar + did backup vocals in a band during her high school and college years. Literally her and William dating can be summed up by "Seriously, what do you see in that guy?!" "He makes me laugh." bc she was and is WAY out of his goddamn league. Not just bc of the whole serial killer thing he was just an even bigger loser in college. Normal people dont develop a crush on a woman after she nearly breaks your nose and makes you bleed, William /j
But yeah uhh. I also dont like the idea of her being absent or neglectful purely because I got way too attached to her (i was originally gonna do that just to make things easy for myself but. Pretty lady,,, I am a very simple lesbian what can i say) so like. She obviously wasnt the greatest, most fantastic mom to ever exist given she was kinda maybe sorta well aware William was making some weird fucking clowns, but like. Hey. She tried. Also side note my reasoning for her being absent during the whole. Yknow. '83 event (and just evan's bday in general) is bc Evan + Elizabeth are twins and Elizabeth demanded a girls-only trip for her bday, and Janet promised Evan she'd do something just as special for him when she got back. That never happened bc he died lmao loser /j
But yeah uhh. Shes got a lot of regrets. Wishes she coulda done a lot of things better. Kinda dies with those regrets. Ive seen people say that one of fnaf's charms is that no character is 100% good and i LOVE that, and wanted to keep it up with Janet. Good mom and overall a good person, however made some bad decisions along the way and whatnot.
Im still working out specifics (ive been slowly working on a lil private fic abt her and william meeting + their early relationship) but uhhh. Minor notes that dont get their own paragraphs is that William sampled her voice for Ballora so yay easy voice claim, she had an on and off relationship with her band's lead singer (her name's Bev), her birth name is actually Janice Schmidt but if you call her Janice she'll knock at least 2 of ur teeth out, she's a runaway teen and got adopted by this older couple bc her home life kinda sucked (idk specifics yet), and also girlie has an extensive criminal record of minor angsty teen type charges. Also teen Mike dying his hair and then 2020's Michael's hairstyle are both kinda references to Janet's hair because he wnated to look less like his father. Thats all ty. No read more bc you WILL look at my mrs afton post, boy /j
Actually no theres more that im remembering as i write the tags and edit a few details. Back to her and William because god im insane about them. So for starters it. Well i was gonna say Janet was def the first to flirt but i think William definitely developed a crush first and they only kept talking bc of said crush so its kinda up for debate. Anyways yeah at first it was a HUGE sorta like "Well he's funny especially when I fluster him so this can be just a fun lil thing" but because they chatted more they def kinda like. Clicked more. William was a huge fan of listening to her music (from. a distance. he looked kinda like a creep but at least janet only misinterpreted it once) but like *specifically* janet he didnt give a fucking shit abt the rest of the band. Uhh. They had their first run-in and janet kinda. Well. Punched him in the nose before he cleared up that he is NOT a pervert or anything weird like that (bc a guy that looks older than he is staring from a distance when there is a clear crowd he could join kinda gave janet the Wrong idea), then they later bumped into each other in the hall and chatted for a bit, then they kinda just kept "accidentally" running into one another. Uhhh. Some cigaerette-themed flirting and a house party later, yay dating :] can you tell where the current cut-off of the fic is /j Also idk how to put this down properly but they are both runaways and can kinda. Get that vibe from one another. Literally Michael is like some fucked up abomination of the both of them between the troubled past + weird situationship thing + runaway stuff + a lot of minor details that arent important rn. I just. Yeah Janet means the world to me go thru her tag on my blog for some art. Not all of my janet art is posted but the non-posted stuff is all concept work/doodles or just. Shit im too embarrassed to post lmao. Anyways NOW im done ty for reading
#scov.txt#janet afton#fnaf: hauntings of the past au#scov.ocs#it goes into the oc tag bc fuck you thats why#RRAUAGAH I AM. SO INSANE OVER HER#afton family and their weird gay situationships. aka will + henry and mike + jeremy and janet + bev#IK A LOT OF THIS ISNT EVEN ABT HER KIDS im so sorry#i dont have a lotta thoughts on evan and honestly i domt have a lot of family details figured out#like. everything is kinda just. general basics#plus also i dont wanna give janet too much focus on account of shes not. extremely important#she has her role to play in the au but theres far more influential characters yknow??#anyways for those of you who have read this far both w/ post and tags. i have one last thing to share#my gf and i have a spinoff au and she and henry are currently dating (both got divorced long in advance dw)#(like. several decades ago. bc this is ghost shenanigans in the sb era)#thats all ty and gn (<- not sleeping its just night where i am)
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OC questions tag meme!
THANK U USER FRAY @bg3 FOR TAGGING ME!!
i will be doing only wren bc ill be so honest theyre the only bitch ive developed
under cut :3
Name:
wren!! chose virtue name harmony but doesnt use it bc she thinks its cringe (subject to change throughout game, not Quite sure)
Nickname(s):
tavernkeeps tend to call them birdie or little bird :p other than that, their older sister calls them spots a lot (due to her little boney growths along their forehead and cheeks)
Gender:
wren doesnt think about gender much other than their chest is a nuisance. they dont think abt it in the sense that being a woman isnt something they necessarily like. see themself as similarly with being a man itslike. nonbinary by virtue of genuinely just not percieving themself and not wnating to
Star sign:
copypasting frays explanation here!! im not so good at lore stuff so my answer will be... off!
this is a little difficult because realms lore has changed on this a lot, if i'm correct in my information. from people being blessed by stars or entire consellations to each month actually having a sign in more recent lore. here is a link anyone doing this for realms ocs (like bg3 ocs) can use to figure this out! the lore on stars and consellations in the realms is spotty at best, but this could be helpful if you wanna go that route!
wren was born at the end of marpenoth, a few days from the start of uktar :3 their sign is praying mantis but i dont know what this means
Height:
just wanted to show wrenlach height giff :3
Orientation:
wren themself isnt too sure of this. theyre pretty sure theyre not into men but they like... havent really explored much outside of flirting with everyone they meet. they dont know but i do. trheyre a nonbinary lesbian.
Nationality/Ethnicity:
wrens an Unspecified Tiefling with a human mother born and raised and living pre Worm Abduction in the lower city of baldurs gate
Favourite fruit:
wren likes apples and pears :3 they think they taste like sand but they like the taste of sand
Favourite season:
wren likes whenever its not too hot and not too cold and not too windy and not too polleny. consitution (8) of a sheltered victorian noble child
Favourite flower:
wren likes potato flowers :3 theyve always been more of a herb person than a flower person truth be told
Favourite scent:
freshly baked bread. when its still soft. a little luxury she afforded herself once in a while whilst in baldurs gate, occasionally given as payment for a days work. wren likes the smell of bread.
Coffee, tea, or hot chocolate:
given the lack of monster energies in faerun lets go coffee. she thinks it tastes like pee pee and poo poo but shotguns it bc it makes her buzz
Average hours of sleep:
anywhere between 1 and 24 hours. roll a dice baby.
Dog or cat person:
wrens an equal opportunities animal enjoyer. dogs maybe. bc wren likes birds and cats keep killing her friends
Dream trip:
wren would like to stay home tbh. adventuring has made them grow as a person bc if they had their way theydve stayed curled up with the artifact in an abandoned house theyd found
Favourite fictional character:
the mermaid from the mermaid smut book wyll, wylls dad and shart have read.
Number of blankets they sleep with:
ideally every blanket in existence. they can make do with 1, maybe even none but they will complain abt being cold and the lack of pressure
Random fact:
wren bites their fingers so her hands are always chapped and bleeding
TAGS!!!!!!!!!!
@bigfatlesbian @oyyokat @orkbutch @lesbianshadowheart @atomicbouquet-heart and anyone else who wants 2 :p
#oc: wren#sorry if this is contradictory or anything that just adds to wrens character. everything isay is canon even when it contradicts other thign#ive said are canon.
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oc questions tag
tagged by @hibernationsuit !! thank youuuu 💜
tagging @rosykims @aevallare @abetterbeginning @gortash @wrenanigans if u want to do this, no pressure! don't remember who's done this recently so i'm sorry if ur getting spammed with this bc of me hehe
anyway it's celyn time babey.. been thinking abt her a lot lately <3
name: celyn surana
nickname(s): uhhh. cel? i gotta think of some cute descriptive nicknames for her that others would teasingly use but i'm drawing a blank rn. will have to ruminate more.
she only lets Very Close Friends call her by any nickname btw. jowan (being her only friend lol) was the only person in the circle who got to call her cel. only andrale and carver have earned this privilege since (andrale only ever calls her celyn tho). leliana earns it as well ten years later during inquisition lol
gender: cis female
star sign: uhhh she was born on the 27th of firstfall which is the thedas equivalent of november sooo sagittarius??
height: 159 cm. my second shortest oc and the same height as me hehe <3
orientation: bisexual!
nationality: fereldan i guess. she was born in ferelden and raised in ferelden's circle of magi but she doesn't have a strong Fereldan Identity. she's not celyn from ferelden she's just... celyn...
favorite fruit: uuuhh apples
favorite season: i'm tempted to say winter bc her aesthetic is so cold and wintery but i think she would prefer a warmer season. maybe mid to late fall actually. she enjoys the gloom and fall colors and the rainy and stormy weather
favorite flower: i wonder if she's ever even seen a live plant actually. i wonder if there are any indoor greenhouses in the circle. wow i'm suddenly making myself sad thinking abt how she's barely seen any nature in her 19 years of life. anyway uhhh!!! gentians are her favorite actually look at how pretty they are
favorite scent: ghghjgh i struggle with any scent or smell related questions bc i have anosmia so idk what things smell like lmao. let's say uhhh whatever a spruce forest smells like. nice n fresh i imagine
coffee, tea or hot chocolate: she's a coffee gal... had to check if coffee exists in thedas and apparently it does and is a major export of antiva. fascinating. anyway she drinks coffee to stay awake late at night reading and studying (forbidden) magic. she enjoys the silence of the night and is at her most productive during that time
average hours of sleep: during her time in the circle i guess it was like... 5-6 maybe? as i said she tends to stay up late and i bet circle inhabitants are expected to wake up crazy early like 6am or sth. it doesn't get any better after leaving the circle bc andrale also expects everyone to get up and moving crazy early. and after officially becoming a warden it gets even worse when she starts having Warden Nightmares ahah
dog or cat person: cat person! she's a bit like morrigan when it comes to dogs. thinks they're stupid n gross lol. though she does eventually warm up to the dog (named assan by andrale <3) in dao.
dream trip: honestly anywhere is fine she is full of wanderlust... what living in a tower for 19 years does to a gal... the whole blight adventure is a dream trip to her i bet. yes she has to fight darkspawn and a horrible death is around every corner but consider: she gets to see ancient elven ruins and denerim and orzammar... so many sights to see and so many new experiences! she feels so alive! and she gets to use her powers to their full extent!! she gets to hone her skills beyond what the circle allowed!!! not that the circle's rules stopped her from studying outlawed magic in secret but like. now she doesn't have to do it in secret anymore.
a trip to tevinter would also be interesting from a purely academic standpoint. nevarra as well because it's more liberal with magic than most of thedas but also safer for her than tevinter? so basically she would like to see the whole world but especially places where she gets to expand her knowledge on magic...
favorite fictional character: in a real world au her favorite fictional character would be morgana pendragon from bbc merlin. this is not at all influenced by the fact that one of my inspirations for her was morgana pendragon from bbc merlin,
number of blankets they sleep with: hmmmm one
random fact: i'm sharing two random facts bc i can't decide which one of these is more interesting or whatev:
celyn is basically the toph to andrale's katara. they have somewhat clashing personalities and differing views on teamwork and the sharing of camp chores... andrale expects everyone to contribute while celyn only looks after herself. also despite her excitement she's kinda terrified to be out in the real world but she won't let it show!! so she acts hyper-independent!!! unfortunately for her andrale can see right through this facade and she calls celyn out on it (she tries to be gentle and constructive about it but she's had it with celyn's shit and fails). so. yea. my point is they argue a lot at first lol! but they become great friends once celyn learns teamwork and communication and andrale loosens up a little
whenever she does fire magic she makes the flames hot enough for them to turn blue, purely for the aesthetic. she also enjoys other ways of showing off with her magic and she was Very competitive in the circle. she simply had to be the best in her class and let the other students know that she was above them. most of her fellow students could not stand her because of this <3
#i have to wonder how she managed to befriend jowan tbh.#anyway. really in a celyn mood lately. i love her#tag games#oc: celyn#thank u for the tag red!!#also if there are greenhouses inside the circle... celyn would tend to them in her free time actually. an extra random fact for u all#ALSO what if celyn adopted a black cat with carver. would that be cute or what.....#carver is soooo fereldan tho he has to be a full on dog person right. would he be willing to get a cat. discuss#also wow some of my answers got really lengthy huh. sry abt that hope u have fun reading extensive celyn lore haha#oc: andrale#gotta tag her too since shes mentioned a few times. some important andrale trivia here...
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Having trouble with thinking of something to ask hrmm
What part of the rw lore do you find most interesting? Like..what are your thoughts on it? any twists you've thought up or any detail/s you just wanna rant abt?
The rainworld lore is painfully a lot and painfully little at the same time, like why are the pearls focused on garbage worms and what is noise milking oh my goddd
moon isnt lore on her own but her pearl readings are a massive source of it. so if i had to say my favorite thing would be iterators and the relationship they had with their colonies. the fact they can vary and the fact iterators have different opinions of their parents!! (one iterator talked abt havjng to sit through dark political times awkwardly like 🧍🤷 at some points. thats funny)
ahem I looove it a lot!! for example the way moon worded her existence is sad. the way she speaks about them is sad. like in short “ancients must not try very hard so we do that for them. at least i did” <- smth along the lines
she sounds bitter she dislikes them with a hidden passion even when she has 5 braincells left. Not to mention she calls them parasites with bad takes (sheesh). something people dont really ?? recognize enough or at all imo is that moon almost retired (ancients moving away from her city) and she was happy about it. Until it didnt work out and some stayed and she was pissed again.
now pebbles speaks with softness (as much as he has it in him) he liked them! he liked their art! their music! he liked witnessing their stupid arguments even when they were in his name (he found the citadel he shaded funny for being so angry)
he found a lot of things they did stupid but he also was impressed in other aspects! he liked them a lot to the point the last item that he keeps for comfort and keeps him together as a whole is a hymn of theirs. even when abandoned, he finds comfort in the company they used to bring him!!! how sad!!
Another part of the lore. Hm cycles.
I have no idea how they work. Youd believe at first that when you die. You get reborn. Pain!!! never escaping!!
But that cant be the case it has sooo many plotholes if thats the case.
1 artificers kids died! straight up GONE. theyre dead!! thats why shes so insane you cant tell me theyre just lost somewhere and also pups cant ascend (me when i reach spiritual enlightenment at 10). theyre straight up gone.
2. imagine u defeat the scav kind and he comes back an hour later.. nah. thjngs DIE
3 why did the ancients go crazy over killing themselves then idk!
4 suns was basically crying about how they dont know what theyll do if spearmaster dies. yeah no respawning then.
So then the cycle is being reborn into smth new. great. how does karma play in this. how do you raise it. time? do you have your old memories after u go into a new cycle?? i dont know!! no scug has ever been plagued with dreams of being smth else before. !!! how do you confirm its a thing!! idk!! how do you know you are in a samsara! i wish we got ancients talking about it. in pearls or smth.
i havent ascended with saint yet. (reached karma 10 and bonked the siblings) but i doubt they answer all of my questions
random kiki rw lore fact- did you know that the rot area - (riv gameplay) there is a room in it thats just called terror!!! it upsets me greatly. the place is so different because the rot literally eats his walls. it fucks me up sometimes even if it seems obvious
#its 1am sorry im so incomprehensible!!!!#my brainrot is very bad WOOO#this is long i can talk for BOOK length amount of words#abt the lore of this game#very good.#also moon#moon is my favorite lore but i decided to be tame#tysm for the question!#ask#pinkavtomation
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( enable my rambling // always accepting ) @mindhallow WROTE: BARGES IN! I FINISHED THE AVATAR SERIES! how does el feel abt bhaal + bhaalspawn? 📝
NOW THAT I'VE FINISHED THE Shadows of the Avatar trilogy and combed through BG1, I feel in a better position to answer this. I do need to finish the Avatar series, but tbh I don't think that'll change my thoughts. Interestingly, I think the best answer to this question comes from the Shandril Saga in something they said before bhaalspawn came into existence.
For context, the main protag of these books is, as the name suggests, Shandril. She has the rare and extremely powerful ability to use spellfire. This drew the attention of the Cult of the Dragon and the Zhentarim. Thus she ended up in Shadowdale to be protected by and learn from El. This exchange with the Simbul occurs after El has tested her abilities for the first time. I'm bolding certain sections for emphasis.
"Impressive, young lady," she said, "but dangerous — perhaps too dangerous. Elminster . . . all of you . . . have you thought on this? Here stands a power you may have to silence. She may have to be destroyed." There was a babble of talk and then a hush. Shandril stared, white-faced, at the archmage, but it was Elminster who moved forward to stand between them and speak. "No," said the old mage. He glared around at all on the hilltop with very old, sad eyes. "Ye," he said to The Simbul, "I, and all gathered here now, are dangerous. Should we then be destroyed out of hand because of what we might do? Nay! It is the right and the doom of all creatures who walk Faerun to do as they will; it is why we of that art frown so at those who charm often, or in frivolous cause. "Not even the gods took unto themselves the power to control ye or me so tightly that we cannot walk or speak or breathe save at another's bidding! It is their will that we may be free to do as we may. Slay a foe, sure, or defend thyself against a raider — but to strike down one who may some day menace thee? That is as monstrous as the act of the usurper who slays all babies in a land, for fear of a rightful heir someday rising against him!"
This a core philosophy of El's — always has been — and absolutely factors into their feelings on bhaalspawn. They are not ignorant of the yolk laid upon them by their father, nor are they ignorant of the prophecies surrounding them. They have studied Alaundo's prophecies thoroughly and have seen many of them play out. Nevertheless bhaalspawn are people with their own free wills. They deserve the chance to exercise that will, even if they fail in their struggle against darker forces or choose to pursue a bloodied path. From BG1:
Whatever the motives, independence is always a wise course to follow. My worry is that thy lineage is harder to escape than most. Thou hast bad blood in thee, though Gorion did what he could to teach thee well and true. Thou hast hungry blood within thee as well, and it will not let thee go without a fight. For better or worse, what’s bred in the bone will be dealt with in time. I trust thou hast the will to face what is within thee?
We have every reason to believe El was directing the Harpers who saved and found homes for many young bhaalspawn. We know for a fact they were involved with Gorion as well and advised him to leave Candlekeep with his ward shortly before the start of the game. Their goal is to give these children the best chance possible. Get them away from bhaalists, try to find them good homes, give them options other than bloodshed. It didn't always work out [gestures to Sarevok, who slipped through the cracks entirely], but an attempt was made to do right by as many as possible.
Interestingly, they said they desired to "remain neutral in this matter", but that doesn't mean they want to be uninvolved or uninvested. They are very invested and show up multiple times throughout the game lmao Rather I think they want to be able to approach the situation with a clear mind. The prophecies surrounding bhaalspawn are dire, and the demands placed upon them by their blood are even more so. Bhaalspawn deserve the freedom to choose, but El needs the clarity to intervene should their choices endanger others.
Also El doesn't believe in leading people by the nose. They'll get heavy-handed if they need to, but that's far from their first choice. Moreover, their "heavy-handedness" takes the form of cause-and-effect statements, not overtaking someone's will. "If you do this, I'll do that." The other party retains the right to choose — and to suffer the consequences. A subtle yet important distinction. But, I'm getting off topic. Point is El feels that forcing someone down the "right" path is just as wrong as forcing them down the "wrong" one. You can guide someone, advise them, teach them, set an example, but ultimately the choice between right and wrong must be theirs. Set consequences, sure, but let them choose. We see this again in BG1 where El has definite opinions on the actions of Gorion's Ward but does nothing to control them. They have to make their own choices, even if they're bad. That applies to all bhaalspawn.
#META / HC: PRIMARY.#mindhallow#it's not their fault their 'dad' is the absolute fucking worst#El doesn't judge them based on their lineage#they don't believe they should be punished for the actions of their father#or that they should be preemptively punished for things they might do#if they make decisions that make it necessary to bring them down that's one thing#but they deserve the freedom to make those decisions!! to decide their own fate!! to fight against the hand they've been dealt!!#El has no delusions that'll be an easy fight but they. have. the. right. to. try.
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