#me at 1 am can't be blamed for making this ridiculous thing

[paiigemahoney]

a true fashion icon

[godricgryffinsnore]

Hi again Della :D

I was just so in love with the last one-shot you wrote on my prompt, that I couldn't resist asking for another. Your writing is just so perfectly sugary sweet that I can't help but be addicted.

It's James Potter again, but I was wondering if this time you could write about him falling for a Seeker from another team and simultaneously wanting to beat her team but also absolutely in love with the way she catches the Snitch.

Thanks love! <3 <3

Catch Me If You Can ♡ | J.Potter ★

“I was mid-match, mid-air, mid-smirk—and then she caught the Snitch and my bloody heart in the same breath.”

pairing : James Potter x fem!Ravenclaw!seeker!reader

summary : A Gryffindor Chaser. A Ravenclaw Seeker. Rivalry blurs, sparks fly, and neither of them is ready for what falls harder—Quidditch… or love.

warnings : mild swearing, flirty banter, rivals-to-lovers tension, closet make-out, chaotic Quidditch energy, James Potter being hopelessly in love. Please let me know if I missed any.

author's note : English is not my first language, so please forgive me for any grammatical errors or spelling errors. Re-blogging is completely fine with me, but please don't copy my work. I love you all. Enjoy <3.

della's note : Oh my god!!! I am so glad you liked the previous one-shot made out of your wonderful request!!! I hope you enjoy this one too <333

word count : 1.8k

navigation <3

banners : @/cafekitsune and @/fic-dumpster

James Potter knew three things for certain:

1. He loved Quidditch.

2. He was the best Chaser in Hogwarts history (his words, not McGonagall’s).

3. He was absolutely, stupidly, insufferably in love with the Seeker from Ravenclaw. You.

The Problem?

You hated his guts.

Well—not hate hate. You respected his game. You tolerated his hair (barely). But you swore on your broomstick, if James bloody Potter winked at you before a match one more time, you were going to ram your Cleansweep right up his—

“Looking fierce today, love,” he called from across the pitch, twirling his broom like he hadn’t just spent five minutes smirking in your direction. “Trying to distract me with that braid again?”

You narrowed your eyes, adjusting your gloves. “Try focusing on the Quaffle, Potter. I’ll be long gone with the Snitch before your ego even takes off.”

“Ooooh, stinger!” Sirius howled behind him. “She’s got bite!”

James just grinned—boyishly, infuriatingly—and mounted his broom like he was mounting a stage. “Oh, I always focus on you.”

The whistle blew.

You’d caught the Snitch. Again.

Your team still lost (blame your Beaters), but the moment your fingers closed around that golden fluttering devil, you felt his eyes on you. Again.

James Potter was clapping—actually clapping—even though you’d technically ruined his winning streak.

“Brilliant form,” he said later as you passed in the hall, all casual-like, like you hadn’t just wiped the smug look off his face midair.

You scoffed, not slowing. “Shame your Keeper couldn’t catch a Quaffle to save his life.”

“Careful,” James said, following you like a duckling in a lion’s den. “I might think you care.”

You rolled your eyes. “I do care. About annihilating Gryffindor next match.”

“Merlin,” he said under his breath, watching you walk away. “I’m so in love with her it’s ridiculous.”

It became a pattern. You’d glare. He’d wink. You’d soar. He’d chase. You’d catch the Snitch—sometimes—and every time you did, he looked at you like you’d just hung the stars yourself.

It was rivalry.

Except…

Only you thought so.

“You’re obsessed with her,” Sirius said one evening, eating toast on James’s bed as he stared out the window at the pitch. Again.

“No, I’m not,” James mumbled, dreamy-eyed.

“You literally just wrote ‘(Y/N) Potter’ in your Transfiguration notes.”

“I did not—” He looked. He had. In swirly cursive.

“I’m doomed,” he muttered.

Remus, from his bed, didn’t even look up. “Just tell her you like her.”

“She thinks we’re rivals,” James said dramatically. “She hates my face.”

“She hates your flirting,” Remus corrected. “Not your face.”

“Well—same thing!”

The final match of the season was pure chaos. Rain. Mud. Bludgers on a rampage. The Snitch dipped and darted like it had a personal vendetta. And somewhere between nearly crashing into you midair and swearing under his breath when you pulled out of a dive last second—James knew.

He couldn’t take it anymore.

You were storming through the corridor after the game, heart hammering from adrenaline, when he caught up with you.

“Oi—wait!” James called, hair soaked, uniform a mess, voice winded.

You turned, scowling. “If you’re here to gloat about that last-minute goal—”

He didn’t let you finish. He grabbed your arm. Shoved open the nearest broom closet. Pulled you inside. Slammed the door.

“What the hell—”

“I like you,” he blurted, soaking wet and panting like a madman. “I’ve liked you since third year. I think you’re the most brilliant flier I’ve ever seen, and I’ve watched you catch the Snitch seventeen times and I still forget how to breathe every single bloody time.”

You blinked. Blink. Blink.

He was close. His hair was dripping. His voice was shaking.

“I don’t—” you started, and he panicked.

“I know you hate me,” he said quickly, “I know I’m annoying and arrogant and possibly the human embodiment of a Bludger but—”

“I don’t hate you,” you said, voice flat.

He froze. “…You don’t?”

You crossed your arms. “I thought you hated me. You’re always smirking and teasing and acting like I’m your personal competition.”

James gawked. “You are my competition! But only because you’re so good I can’t stop watching you.”

Oh.

The silence fell. Humid. Close.

Then—slowly—you grinned.

“So…” you said, leaning against the door, eyes narrow. “You pulled me into a broom closet to confess you’re in love with me?”

James’s mouth flapped. “I—no—I mean, yes—but I wasn’t going to say love—”

“Oh?” You raised a brow.

“Okay, fine!” he burst. “Yes! I’m bloody mad about you. I love the way you fly. I love your sarcasm. I love that you hate my flirting. I love that you always catch the Snitch even when I’m trying to flirt mid-match like a moron—I love—” He stopped. Lowered his voice. “…you.”

Your heart was racing.

You leaned in. Just a little. Close enough that your noses brushed.

“You’re a dramatic little show-off, you know that?”

His breath caught. “Yeah?”

You tilted your head. “But I guess I could love that too.”

His eyes widened.

And then you kissed him.

It wasn’t slow. It wasn’t gentle. It was all broom-closet heat and pent-up tension and muddy uniforms and a desperate, gleeful kind of hunger. He gripped your waist. You yanked his shirt collar. His glasses fogged. The world spun.

When you finally pulled away—his lips kiss-bruised, his heart probably doing Quidditch flips—he breathed:

“So…you do like me.”

You smirked. “Catch me if you can, Potter.”

And then you opened the door and strutted out—leaving James Potter, Captain of the Gryffindor team and biggest dork in the castle, laughing breathlessly in a broom closet, madly in love with the girl who thought they were rivals.

Epilogue – Post-Practice Banter

James: “Hey babe, remember when you thought we were enemies?”

You: “I still kind of want to knock you off your broom sometimes.”

James: grinning “Merlin, marry me.”

You: “Buy me a Firebolt first.”

James: “Done. Want the diamond to match it?”

There were many things James Potter could do well.

Win Quidditch games. Charm professors. Make Lily Evans roll her eyes in record time.

But one thing he could not do—despite his very public insistence otherwise—was keep his hands (or eyes) off you during a match.

Not anymore.

Because now… He could kiss you. He could touch you. He could say “you’re mine,” and then prove it behind the stands when no one was looking.

Only—well.

People were looking.

“Mate,” Sirius said one stormy afternoon after practice. “You’re playing like a lovesick Bludger.”

“I am not,” James said, lying.

“You flew into your own Keeper.”

“He swerved—”

“He was standing still.” Sirius blinked. “Right outside the goalpost. Doing literally nothing.”

Remus looked up from his book. “You also dropped the Quaffle. Twice.”

“Was distracted,” James muttered, and oh no, because even thinking about you sent that dopey little grin creeping across his face.

Sirius pointed. “That’s the face. That’s the face of a man about to ruin his own game for love.”

“I am not ruining anything—”

“You’re doomed,” Remus said, flipping a page.

“Completely whipped,” Sirius added. “Absolutely done for. Can’t wait till the team finds out.”

James scoffed. “They’re not going to find out.”

He was very proud of this plan, actually.

You two had agreed—no one could know you were dating. Too much drama. Too many Quidditch politics. Ravenclaws would say it was favoritism, Gryffindors would never shut up, Sirius would make it everyone’s problem.

So you had a foolproof system.

Flirt behind the greenhouses. Make out in the library stacks (Section B—far corner). Kiss behind the Quidditch stands. Avoid each other on the pitch like well-behaved, non-infatuated rivals.

Simple.

It was foolproof. Perfect.

Except for one problem.

James was a fool. And he was in love.

Saturday’s Match: Gryffindor vs Ravenclaw

The pitch was golden with morning light, cheers echoing, house colors waving like fire in the wind.

You were hovering mid-air, wind in your hair, eyes sharp on the glimmer of gold near the west end.

And James?

James was not watching the Quaffle.

He was watching you.

Your hair, twisted up in a ribbon.

The way your fingers clenched the broom handle.

The way your knees locked as you dove, fast and low, the Snitch just—

“JAMES!” Sirius screamed. “FOR THE LOVE OF MERLIN, THE QUAFFLE!”

Too late. It was in the goal. Again.

You caught the Snitch five minutes later, graceful and smirking.

And James Potter sat slumped mid-air like a kicked puppy, utterly useless and sickeningly proud.

After the Match – Gryffindor Locker Room

Silence.

Absolute, terrifying, accusatory silence.

James stood, towel over his shoulder, mud on his boots, surrounded by his team.

No one spoke.

Then—

“Alright,” said Charlotte, the Beater. “Who’s the girl?”

James blinked. “What?”

“The girl,” said Oliver, their Keeper. “The one you’re clearly thinking about instead of playing like a functional Chaser.”

“There’s no girl—”

“Mate,” Charlotte said, “you just watched their Seeker fly like she was the last chocolate frog on Earth. You didn’t blink for ten minutes.”

“I—”

“You cheered when she caught the Snitch.”

“I was being polite—”

“You clapped.”

“Alright, fine!” James snapped, cheeks pink. “I might be…seeing someone.”

The team gasped as one.

“WHO?!”

James looked skyward, as if praying to Merlin for mercy.

“Promise not to kill me?”

“No,” said Charlotte.

He sighed. “It’s…Ravenclaw’s Seeker.”

Silence.

Then—chaos.

“YOU TRAITOR!” “Bloody hell, it’s her?!” “Wait, she’s hot, though—” “NO, YOU DON’T GET TO THINK THAT, SHE’S HIS HOT.”

Sirius, smirking in the doorway: “Told you.”

Remus, not even surprised: “You owe me five Galleons.”

Meanwhile – You, to your team:

“He’s an idiot. I love him. I’m also going to kill him.”

“Respectfully,” said your Captain, “we’d prefer if you made out after you win.”

Later That Night – Behind the Stands

He was leaning against the pillar, arms crossed, grinning.

“Fancy seeing you here,” he murmured.

You shoved his shoulder. “You clapped, you absolute muppet.”

He laughed. “You looked so good catching the Snitch, I forgot I was supposed to win.”

You groaned, burying your face in his chest.

“You’re the worst boyfriend ever.”

“Oi! I’m your number one fan.”

You looked up, narrowing your eyes. “The team knows now, don’t they?”

“…Define knows.”

You smacked his chest.

He caught your wrists.

And kissed you.

It was sweet and slow, your hands tangling in his hair, his breath warm against your cheek.

“I love you,” he whispered, forehead pressed to yours.

You smiled.

“Even though I ruin your record?”

“Especially because of that.”

Bonus Scene – Gryffindor Practice the Next Day

James: entirely distracted watching you walk past the pitch with a book in hand

Sirius: “There he goes again. Should we wave a Quaffle in front of his face? Or maybe just toss him at her and save time?”

Remus: “I’ve already got the broom closet cleared out. They’ll end up in there by dinner.”

James, dazed: “She’s wearing my jumper.”

Entire team, in unison: “WE KNOW!”

[tobesolonely]

untitled angsty but then sweet piece...

hello guys!! it's been like over a year lol. I was going through my google doc and found this and I feel like I never posted it? so now I am posting it. maybe this can be a part 1 but also we know I'm great at starting multipart stories and not finishing them so lets see

૮₍ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ₎ა

warnings: none (~1.2k words)

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“You're just gonna ignore me then, babe?”

Y/N continues silently puttering around in the kitchen, going out of her way to make sure her back remained turned on Harry. There weren't many ways to get under his skin, but throughout her years of being with him she learned that being on the receiving end of the silent treatment usually made him fold pretty quickly. She was annoyed with her husband and the fact that he seemed clueless as to why made her even more upset.  

“I take your silence as a yes?” 

More puttering. More re-wiping the already clean counters. Starting the tea kettle. Washing her hands. Anything to not acknowledge Harry, really.

“I can’t make it better if you don't tell me why you're so upset, love,” he takes a tentative step toward her. “I know we've been together for ages but I still can't read your mind. Think ‘m gettin’ real close, though.”

This is said jokingly, and she knows her husband is just trying to dissipate the tension that's thick in their kitchen, making the spacious room seem impossibly small. She doesn't acknowledge his joke, doesn't crack a smile because that would give him too much satisfaction. Nothing made Harry cockier than being the reason for Y/N’s laugh, a sound so sweet she’s pretty sure he’d forbid everyone on the planet except him from listening to it because he wanted it all to himself. He always told her it was music to his ears.

The fact that he doesn't even know what he did is what finally causes her to break, muttering about how fucking ridiculous he is under her breath. It's not lost on Harry. 

“Now you've moved on from ignoring me to cursing at me?” he sounds more curious than upset, taking another step toward her. She backs away, defensively crossing her arms over her chest and she doesn't miss the way Harry’s brow furrows at the action. “Can y’please tell me what I did, Y/N? Please?” When she looks down at the ground, ignoring his please, he begs some more. He’s not above groveling, really. 

“Please, angel? Lemme fix it,” his eyes are wide and wild as he wildly searches hers for some clue as to what he did wrong. “Tell me-”

“Am I always just gonna come second with you?” 

She can almost see the wheels in her husband’s head turning, knows he's choosing his words carefully before he speaks so as not to upset her any further. 

“Okay, love,” he runs a ringer hand through his hair. “Can you be a little bit more specific?”

“We had plans this afternoon, Harry. We were gonna try that new café that just opened. I was looking forward to it,” she doesn't care if this makes her sound selfish and childish. “I know you were working and I know you how much you love to do that, but sometimes I feel like-”

“Don’t even finish that thought,”  Harry cuts her off and his tone is sharp, calloused. “That’s not true.”

“You know, at first I was worried something happened when you didn't show,” Y/N continues like she didn't hear him. “But then I realized nope, you probably just forgot or couldn't get out of another meeting. Just like always.”

A look of sadness flashes across Harry’s face, which quickly transforms to indignant anger. “Don't throw this in my face, Y/N. You know how much I hate that.” 

“So I’m supposed to be mindful of the things you hate, but you can't be mindful of the things I hate?”

“You don't get it,” he mumbles under his breath, growing increasingly done with the conversation the longer it drags on. “You're not in the industry. I can't just always leave-” 

“Then blame it on me! Make me the bad guy, Harry,” she finally turns all the way around to face him completely. “The people you work with get to see you more than I do…the fans…” Y/N trails off, letting her unfinished thoughts hang limply in the air. 

It’s quiet between the couple for no more than thirty seconds, but it feels like a lifetime. Harry breaks it first - he always does. He inhaled a deep shaky breath, trying to call forward the breathing techniques his therapist taught him to use in high-stress situations. Right now counts as a high-stress situation. 

“You’re right, angel,” the pet name slips off his tongue easily which comforts Y/N. Harry’s not as upset as she thought he was. He’s still her Harry. “That’s not fair of me, is it?”

All Y/N can do is shake her head, lower lip jutted out. She knows if she tries speaking she’ll start crying, and she doesn't want to cry. All she wants is for Harry to understand. Harry however, knows her too well. He knows the look she gets on her face when she's trying really hard not to cry and he knows she goes silent because she doesn't trust her voice not to come out shakey. He decides to continue talking.

“I should've called you and let you know I’d be late- or told you we needed to reschedule. I’m sorry I left you hanging, darling.” He pauses, selecting his next words very wisely. Harry knows his wife is sensitive. The last thing he wants is for her to think he's blaming her for anything. “...but it seems like this is about more than me missing our lunch. Which, again, I'm very sorry about. I'm taking you wherever you want for dinner tonight and I'll make you dessert when we get home. Let's talk more about this though, yeah?”

“You also have to be in charge of picking up after Hershey for a month,” Y/N responds with a small smile on her face. Hershey was the couple’s tiny brown poodle who was the cutest puppy in the world. “Thank you.”

“Mmm,” Harry hums, knowing his wife was trying to keep the conversation lighthearted since she hated confrontation. Since being with Harry her communication skills have improved tremendously since he was so good at it and wanted to talk about everything, but healthy communication clearly still didn't come as easily to her. “Talk to me, angel. What’s this about?”

Harry’s in front of her now, arms wrapped limply around her waist. He walks her backward until the small of her back hits the counter then he tells her to, “jump” so he can lift her onto the counter. Once she's situated he settles himself in between her legs and places his arms back on their place on her waist. Harry looks intently into Y/N’s eyes and she knows she won’t be leaving that spot until she tells him what's bothering her, so she just says it.

“I want a baby.” 

Harry raises his eyebrows in quick surprise before breaking out in a wide grin- the kind that causes his nose to scrunch up and wrinkles to form around his eyes. 

“You want a baby? W’ me?”

Y/N doesn’t return his smile, which quickly makes Harry’s turn into a frown.

“Why don’t you look happy?”

Y/N sighs, her eyes avoiding Harry’s. He gently places his index finger under her chin and pushes it up, forcing her to look into his eyes. He’s desperately searching his wife’s eyes, trying to figure out why she isn’t more excited about coming to this big decision. Harry has been ready for years of course, but he never wanted her to feel pressured.

“You’re never here, Harry. I don’t want to feel like a single mom.” Y/N looks down again and Harry doesn’t lift her chin back up this time. In fact, he doesn’t say anything. It’s silent for what feels like a couple minutes but is actually maybe only twenty seconds, the faucet leaking being the only sound heard throughout the whole house.

“Y/N…love,” Harry inhales a shaky breath, removing one of his hands from her hip to run his fingers through his curls. “I never want to make you feel like you’re alone. Not just with this, but…with anything.” Harry gently knuckles away a stray tear falling down Y/N’s cheek. 

“I know you don’t mean to make me feel this way, H. I guess it’s just what I signed up for when I married a popstar, yeah?” Harry can tell Y/N is trying to lighten the mood, but he doesn’t like that he’s the reason for he feeling this way.

“You didn’t “sign up” for anything, love. I’m your husband and you’re my wife and we’re supposed to be there for each other through it all, good and bad.” Y/N opens her mouth to say something but Harry gently pinches her hip, muttering for her to let him finish. “I want a baby with you. I want everything with you, Y/N. I want to be here for everything. I’m going to be better about being here.”

“H…I love you and I know you’ll try, but you’ve said this before-”

“I’ll take a break, babe. Cancel everything,” Harry’s talking faster now, excitement about his plan evident in his voice. “We’ll focus on ourselves and start our family. Go out of the country and leave my bloody phone here, if you’d like.” Y/N giggles at that, which makes Harry give her a big, dimpled grin.

“Will it be okay? With Jeff and everyone?” Although Y/N’s sure people on Harry’s team won’t be happy with his sudden change in plans, she can’t deny how charming the idea sounds. She could already picture them at their favorite villa in Italy, the one Harry purchased as a wedding gift to her and where they spent their unforgettable honeymoon. In all honesty, she’s surprised they didn’t get a baby out of that trip.

“Let me worry about that. You just worry about buying yourself some new bikinis, yeah?” Harry places a lingering kiss to Y/N’s jawbone. “Perhaps a few things for me to rip off you too, hmm?”

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hooray for happy endings :')

[uniquethingtastemaker]

So, I have a lot of Vil fanfics in the works, right? So much so that the Rook x Reader fanfic I was writing turned into a Vil one. Honestly, it was frustrating. However, it got me thinking about why I like writing for Vil. I thought I'd explain.

Vil is like my Epel. Vil wants to see Epel improve, and I want to see Vil improve. He has so much potential, but it's going to waste! It's ridiculous. Pomefiore is about bettering yourself. He should follow his dorm's code of conduct by focusing on communication skills.

Another thing I like about Vil is he'd be less resistant than Epel. In Chapter 5, Epel has a big inferiority complex surrounding his masculinity. Because of that, he's resistant to Vil's suggestions. On the other hand, Vil values improving oneself above all. In Chapter 6, Vil told Idia that even if there's a 1% chance that something will work, you should go for it. You can say you tried by the end. If you didn't, you wouldn't know if it worked. (I could be totally wrong about that quote, so please correct me if I am.) That's Vil's mindset. He's willing to try different things if it will help improve himself. That's an attractive quality. It's refreshing to write someone so willing to better themselves. In my fanfics, I like to bring out that latent potential.

Another reason I think he would be willing is because nobody calls him out in Chapter 5. At least not in a way that he’s receptive to. Deuce semi-calls him out after Epel runs out. However, Ace sides with Vil. It pushes Deuce to become reactive. Vil is a logical person. He tends to write off other's emotions, especially during Chapter 5. In that chapter, Vil is a master at rationalizing his behavior towards others. He's intimidating and confident. He uses logic to override, demean, and invalidate other's emotions. It's an awful and effective way to shut up an opposing party. Vil portrays himself as always being right. It seems like he's infallible. He can't be swayed or wrong, so people don't challenge him. He'll shred them with his logic. For others, it's not worth the effort. He displays a lot of toxic narcissistic behaviors in the chapter. It makes you wonder if you're crazy for feeling such emotions because he seems so self-assured. It's classic gaslighting. He sucks in that chapter. Vil becomes much better and more considerate in the later chapters, though. It's endearing watching him care about his Pomefiore group so much. He came a long way from being self-absorbed to valuing his friendships. It's part of why I love him. He's the only person to overblot that apologizes and compensates the victims. Despite his progress, he still has ways to improve. That's what I like to do in my fanfics.

Let's also talk about Vil's communication style, because that's the main aspect he should improve. In Chapter 5, Vil is overly harsh because he's stressed. He reverts to what he knows best. His behavior comes from the environment he was in as a child. The entertainment industry is brutal and unkind. Based on his communication style, it's clear he received that kind of treatment. I imagine there's also a level of "I had to go through all that criticism and pain. If I could put up with it, you can too." That's why he's so quick to give a harsh sentence. It's not healthy. However, that's what he experienced the most. Although his dad loves and cares about him (i'm like 90% sure. i haven't read that event, but he seems like the type lol), I don't think he shielded Vil a lot from the abusive aspects. It's clear by how callous Vil can be. I don't blame or fault Vil's dad for this, either. The entertainment industry's toxic behavior bleeds everywhere. There's only so much a parent can do to shield their kid. Besides, the important part is what happens after the trauma. Vil has a good and loving relationship with his dad. That's what's important.

So, in Chapter 5, Vil is fully absorbed in himself and his problems. He's not thinking about other people. He doesn't care about how they feel. The only way to snap him out of this state is to appeal to his desires. I won't tell you the different ways to do this because that's in my fanfics, but that's the basic way to get Vil to listen in stressful situations.

I also connect with his character a lot. A theater kid who has unrealistic and high expectations of themselves. Someone who's exhausted but continues pushing themself to the brink because they won't be enough otherwise. A person prone to burnout but doesn't have time for it. They have to keep changing and improving themselves to remain relevant and important. Someone with such a packed schedule they don't have time for friends outside of their activities. A person who's supposed to be strong, so whenever a problem happens, they try to solve it themself. It often goes awry, but sometimes it works. Either way, it's traumatic. I see a lot of myself in Vil. At least I did.

I became a better person after I left the environment that pushed me to act that way. I learned to slow down and realize I am enough by being myself. It's ok to go at my own pace when learning things. I don't have to be perfect or the best to be important and loved. I can have fun with friends outside of the activities I do. It's ok to have fun and relax around other people. I don't have to be perfect all the time. I discovered I like writing more than acting. However, I still love the performing arts. It's always been one of my outlets. It was why I was able to handle my childhood. Through all of this self-improvement, I became a better person. I was able to overcome some of my self-destructive and unhelpful behaviors. Obviously, I still struggle with some of these aspects, but I have the help I need. I have a good support system (like Vil gets after Chapter 5).

When I write for Vil, I write to help him become a better person. The biggest thing he lacks is interpersonal skills. That's my specialty. I'm fantastic at conflict management, voicing my feelings, and interpersonal communication. My skills help Vil reach his full potential. I want to help him. He's willing to learn to improve himself. That's why I feel so passionate about him. In real life, not many people take my suggestions regarding self-improvement. It's a great joy to write someone who's not only willing but will give it their all. He reminds me of myself in that way. When I first learned about some of my most invaluable skills, I threw myself into it too. I imagine Vil doing the same.

That's why I love writing for Vil.

[rwbyrg]

How do you stay positive seeing all the negativity we get for shipping this?

I don't typically talk about discourse, but I know this is something pretty much every RG shipper has faced at some point. So I'll make an exception this once. For anyone that doesn't want to hear about it, I strongly encourage you to keep scrolling.

I'm gonna keep it brief(ish) and vague, but content warning for topics of mental health, abuse, general fandom toxicity and ship discourse.

The short answer is that I've had to completely remove myself from large fandom spaces. I left Twitter last fall, I'm not in any big Discords, and I never check the fandom Reddits. I block bullies, bystanders, and bad faith arguers liberally. I mute words and phrases I don't wish to see, I don't engage with the bad faith takes, and I don't go looking in tags much either.

I surround myself with a small group of friends that I enjoy spending time with and can trust. So I still have outlets to be able to geek out without risk of dealing with the wider community's negativity. This blog was also created as a safe outlet to ramble, join together, or spread positivity about the ship. I know how rough it is for us out there - in the RWBY fandom as a whole, as well as within our own RG shipping spaces. So since I can't be an impartial community leader that helps run events or bigger spaces for us like I used to, this is kind of all I have left to offer.

The slightly longer addition that got way out of hand:

I'm not going to say it's not lonely. That I don't miss being part of a more active, wider group of people that we should have every right to join. But despite how hard some of us tried, there was nothing we could do to change the toxicity that is so deeply rooted at the core of this fandom. The fact that I even tried as hard as I did was 1. a trauma response and 2. just ended up with me - and too many of my friends - getting hurt anyway. I can't regret it because it's how I made the friends that are so dear to me now. But none of us should have had to deal with the cyberbullying, harassment, dog-piling, backstabbing, suibaiting, or any of that other garbage to find the group we have today.

It's extremely fucked up. There's no way to sugar coat it. All of it is abuse and is genuinely traumatizing to many people. I am not using these as buzzwords either. Myself and a handful of my rg shipping friends have literally gone to therapy to help us heal from all the things we've experienced in this fandom. So I have it on the authority of multiple psychiatrists, therapists, and social workers that what I am saying here is true.

Rosegarden and its shippers have become the scapegoat of a toxic community. There are big name fans who've staked their entire platforms on the idea of a rival ship being canon. And so, when they see any of us suggesting a Very Likely alternative to their reality (even if we're minding our own business), they become violent and go out of their way to try and defend it. There are entire servers and friend groups built on bullying this ship and its shippers for similar reasons. Anyone that argues against them, no matter how valid their stance, or how articulately its delivered, is going to become a target. Because we are seen as a threat to a system they directly benefit from. If any of them were to acknowledge how unreasonable or ridiculous all of this is, what would that mean for the circumstances and relationships they've built for themselves? It would all fall apart, wouldn't it?

This is why we also see fellow RG shippers invalidating or blaming us for what we go through. Because some of them have become convinced that if they side with the bullies and paint themselves as "not like those shippers", then they'll be "safe". Which as we all know isn't true. Because the antis attack each other for the smallest offences that don't have anything to do with us anyway.

The RWBY fandom is not alone in struggling with this. Fandoms everywhere are seeing these same patterns play out in different ways. A lot of people without as many stakes in the arguments will often scoff or dismiss it on the basis of it being "so serious, when it's just about fictional characters". And to that, I say: bullshit.

First of all, the people on the other side of the screen dealing with all of this are Real People with Real Feelings and their own lives that are already hard enough as it it. And these sorts of environments, as previously mentioned, can and do cause severe harm. Second, none of this hate has anything to do with fictional characters. That is part of the reason why I am still able to enjoy this ship and this show despite everything I've been through here. Because the fictional characters are simply the means to an end. And while that end is different for everyone, for the bullies - by and large - it offers them power in the face of their insecurities.

The only reason this space is as toxic as it is, is because the loudest voices are often the most emotionally immature. All the reasonable people see the infighting going on and know that engaging with it is a pointless waste of energy. As someone that did try to fight it, I truly don't blame any of them for staying uninvolved. But power comes in numbers; so until a large enough group of the reasonable ones come forward, this fandom will only continue on the course it's headed.

I rambled a lot and I'm not even sure how much of this is relevant to your question. If i were to give a tl;dr to answer you, it is this:

You need to curate your own experience by setting boundaries for yourself that cannot easily be crossed by people or content that is going to upset you.

Recognizing the reason people behave the way they do towards all of this has very little, if anything, to do with the show, the ship itself, or the people shipping it is very liberating.

Don't be like how I was. Don't try and force it when it isn't working. If you are in an environment or a habit that you are getting more harm than joy from: leave. It doesn't always feel like it in the moment, but it is better to be alone than to be surrounded by people who suck. And when you shed the ones that don't treat you well, you open yourself up to more like-minded people that will want to be friends with you anyway.

I say this genuinely with only love and support in my heart, but: touch grass. As often as you can, as often as you need to: get offline. Read a book, engage in other hobbies, connect with people in real life, go for a walk or just get outside if you can. When you start connecting with the reality on your side of the screen more, it puts how pointless and absurd so much of this discourse really is into perspective. Moderation is key.

I'm sorry that all of the negativity has got you down. No one wants to acknowledge how much this sort of thing can affect our well being, but I know first hand how bad it can get. None of it is fair. The feelings you're having are valid and aren't anything to be ashamed about. If you have friends or family you can rely on for support, reach out to them when you need it. If you're in a place where you think the help you need is a bit more specialized, you have my support and encouragement in making the call or doing the research to get started. Therapy isn't accessible and doesn't always work for everyone, but it's not the only option. Before I could afford it, I micro-dosed by reading self-help books and following therapists on Instagram, lol.

I'm not sure what else I can say, and have said more than I meant to anyway. But hang in there, you're not alone, and take care of yourself, okay?💕🫂

[fracturediron]

Something I do like about the character writing for DFF is that 1) The characters really do feel like messy teenagers 2) The characters do shitty things, hurt each other or do harmful things to themselves that - frustrating and painful as it is to watch - make sense for the character and their circumstances. The characters don't often make the smart or best decision, but for the most part, it makes sense in context.

Tw for discussion of sexual abuse

Like am I mentally yelling at Non to forget about the movie, ditch these shitty 'friends', be honest with Phee, report Kru Keng and to move to Phee's school? Yes, I am. Do I understand why he doesn't do any of those things? Yes, I do.

He's a teenager who's mentally ill, isolated, with low self esteem and coming from a place of poverty.

As a kid, I was also part of a group of 'friends' who were actually bullies. Although things never went nearly as far as they do in DFF, I can get where Non's coming from. When you're that desperate for acceptance and to be a part of a group (however shitty it may be), and when perhaps they're not even always shitty, just enough so to make you consider staying around, you'll stay around in the hope things get better.

Non's family are poor - to the point of taking out loans for New - and he's already brought trouble to their door due to the money laundering scheme, as well as to his parents' relationship. In contrast to New - who's implied to be the golden child - Non likely feels like he's brought nothing but trouble and misery to his family.

As someone who's mentally ill and on medication, I wouldn't be surprised if he felt ashamed of his mental illness as well, and felt like that already made him a 'burden' to his family. Disclaimer that I don't know how mental illness is treated in Thailand specifically, but as someone from an East/Southeast Asian background, I do feel like in general, mental illness is something that still has a more of a stigma to it in Asia than it does in the West (not that there isn't stigma here too). Like, I would never tell my mum I'm in therapy because I feel like she wouldn't truly understand, and might even blame herself for me going. From her point of view, only 'crazy' people, someone with something seriously wrong with them or someone suffering from severely traumatic event would go to therapy.

When Non got taken in by the police, Phee talked to his dad to get him released, putting himself in potential trouble with his dad and potential future trouble with the police if this comes under any further scrutiny.

Non says time and time again he doesn't want to be a burden to anyone, and he already feels like he's been a burden to his family and Phee. He knows his family can't afford the debt, and he doesn't want to trouble Phee further. So when Kru Keng offers him money in exchange for sex, even though he knows what Kru Keng's doing is wrong, even though he doesn't want to lie and 'cheat' on Phee (and don't tell me it's 'cheating'; again, this is an adult in a position of power grooming a vulnerable youngster), he believes he'd be bringing his troubles to his loved ones and doesn't want to be even more of a 'burden.' So he has sex with Kru Keng.

And then Phee's reaction to finding out. Does he react badly and then say something really awful to Non by telling him to get lost and die? Yes. Do I understand why he reacted like that? Yes! Again, he's a teenager, and probably one in his first serious relationship, and reacting out of anger and hurt, without full details of the situation or understanding of why what Kru Keng's doing is incredibly wrong (even if Non seems to be 'consenting').

Unfortunately, in cases of real life teacher-student grooming, it's not uncommon for the reaction of students (especially teenagers) to not be one of 'oh, that's fucked up, the teacher's a monster, poor student [x]' but for the victim to be ridiculed or slut-shamed by some quarters, especially if it's seen as 'consensual.'

Jin's reaction too. Is it shitty he videoed Non and then (almost?) posted it on social media? Yes. Is it because of him taking that video that it somehow got disseminated to the rest of the school? Yes. Do I understand why he reacted this way? Yes. People are messy and human, and doesn't always react in the best ways in the face of hurt, anger and immaturity

[meanbossart]

Responding to more asks!

Again just want to thank everyone for enjoying my weird little man and the weird little things i draw, i genuinely did not think my sense of humor and uh horror-y persuasion would jibe with so many other fans of this game... Which, come to think of it might have been my mistake, because 90% of us did pick dark urge and have a great time with it, to be fair. Seriously, anyone else was shocked by how hard larian went with the horror themes and gore descriptions in that game? That's probably what won me over LOL who knew fantasy could be so nasty, god bless them.

THANK YOU though i mostly wanted to point out that i never did any BTD art, so you MIGHT be confusing me for someone else! Unless you're speaking more generally just to reference an specific time online. Either way, im glad you enjoy what i do now! Similarly to the last ask i also did not expect people who knew me from my old stuff to be into my newfound interest in elves LOL

Hell yeah man, i haven't really been edgy like that for over a decade but i can't believe experiences like it shaped so much of the internet in our age bracket. Ridiculous lol. Thank you so much for sticking with me for that long, cheers to growing into mostly functional adults!

ALSO that comic was actually barbatus' work but i don't blame you for the mixup hehe

Wanna give this one a little 1-on-1 attention to say im glad my weird style has such an unusual upside for you 😭 that's something i never considered. Also i wasn't aware of that condition so you've given me a little something interesting to learn more about now.

I wasn't aware of that manga at all and to be completely honest i am usually a little put off by the typical manga art style, but this one specifically seems REALLY pretty and expressive, im obsessed with the cover that keeps coming up on the google search. I might have to take a peek at it! Thank you for the recommendation and i hope you have a lovely day

WRINKLY FUCKERS UNITE naturally people should draw however they want to draw, but i'll always be happy to hear that someone looked at my stuff and thought "hmmm im gonna make my grimaces uglier" LOL

I wasn't aware of wraith but it looks like a riot LOL I actually take great inspiration from the works of Jason Shawn Alexander and Sean Murphy! Also, even more so, I would say my boyfriend's (@barbatusart) highly expressive art style has influenced mine a great deal throughout the years. Thank you so much for the message!

[archivalofsins]

In a funnier turn of events after getting that Mikoto post out I am feeling more comfortable discussing his character. It was really bugging me that I was perceiving the fandom as an unsafe space to discuss plurality on a two alter system basis. It never seemed appropriate to gush about it given the things I'd been shown being said.

Yet, I was really happy with Double and the Neoplasm voice drama. Because it showed how diverse dissociative identity disorder can be with just two alters. Instead of just doing the same old hi I'm the totally good one and I'd never hurt a fly and I'm sin incarnate sometimes I just do bad shit for the lols you know.

The thing that most media does when discussing that presentation. I don't know how to really tackle my own feelings on it. It's like most my life I grew up seeing it represented as oh no, the evil one is out. As though the person had been possessed almost. So, it was very refreshing to see it be like, "Oh well, they're both just people. No one is as simple as just good or bad. They both have a variety of behavior."

It's something that should by now rightfully be expected when it comes to that sort of representation of it. Yet when it comes to two people always focus on the duality. The light and the dark the good and the evil. They try to separate all nice in neat like that without really focusing on the individuals. So, I was ultimately really pleased by Milgram. Though it could be because I'm more on the older side or just I gave up on looking for good representation and started avoiding anything thar covered it in middle school.

Honestly, I still avoid things that deal with it outside of Milgram. Simply out of habit of thinking, man, is it gonna be this shit again? How do I know it's not that shit again? Oh well, you gotta watch it, of course. I'm not doing that. I don't trust it. Yet with Double, there were just so many great things about it that really made me go.

Yeah, they get it. This is actually great. I couod harp on the lyrics all day.

Like favorite lines were,

1. That'd be good.

With the lyrics before it and how it's enunciated with so much longing paired with the visuals of him wiping the blood to look down into the other end of the train. It really fucking goes hard as a line. Really embodying the whole come on praise me for helping you I did good right I saved you right so hey where's my thank you it'd be good if you said it energy.

2. Doesn't matter if you didn't wish for it, can't get rid of me now. Just the two of us, relieved, aren't you? I'll protect you (us).

Just the enunciation the growl. It's just really good as if going oh you want to push me down well I'm not going anywhere.

3. "He's a liar," you said and made me out to be a scoundrel, why?

The fucking double meaning if this one line is just so got damn amazing. It's not only calling back to the ridiculous accusations lines in Double but discussing the audiences response to Mikoto. Calling him a liar claiming he was faking. But the second half is referring to the audiences reaction to John making him out to be a scoundrel immediately blaming the murders on him. Labeling him as the bad one without even a second thought. Only leaving him to ask why? Putting more meaning behind the line

4. Hey, I just wanted to save you, so why did it come to this? Cling to me hoist me up as your savior stand up and sing out your gratitude- So, why?

As though Mikoto is their asking why is your song like this you should be praising me. You should be grateful so why?

5. I don't remember a thing it couldn't be helped I'm Double (MeMe).

This line is super great because it's like John and Mikoto both claiming onus of their own songs. And John answering Mikoto's question about why his song is like this. Basically going it couldn't be helped I'm Double. Basically saying it was bound to turn out like this because I'm like this.

6. Why, why? If only I were never born, if only-

To me, this came off as John going. If only I had never been born at all, then neither of us would have existed, and this wouldn't have happened. Expanding on the idea that Es and Kotoko both bring up that his existence is the problem. Which most wouldn't immediately go they mean because of my disorder but go yeah fuck it you're right if I never even lived to begin with this wouldn't have happened. I wouldn't even be here for this to happen and then the apology after these lines as if apologizing for having been born at its sooo good.

It has no right to be sooooo good. So, yes despite the incredible detriment that this week has been to my mental health and my anxiety literally being on a fucking hundred. Double has been the best fucking thing to ever happen to me personally. And it's so fucking amazing.

I love it so much.

[ingravinoveritas]

Just popping by to say how much I appreciate you. Thank you for always keeping a level head. Even when you're disagreeing or calling out bullshit, you still manage to stay diplomatic and respectful. And of course, you always focus on the important things, the main one being that Michael is David's #1 fan (and vice versa)

Aw, thank you so much for this! I can't tell you how nice it was to get this message in my inbox (and apologies for not replying sooner, as I've been entirely swamped and am now trying to catch up on my Asks).

Given that this was from two weeks ago, I'm going to guess that this is mainly in response to the whole situation with David's BAFTA nom and some of the reactions that have occurred as a result. I think a lot of people have said a lot of clumsy things (looking at you, Neil) and while some may not have meant to take away from David's big moment, that still seems to be what's happened. I absolutely believe David is more than deserving of the nomination and it is long overdue at this point. He should've been nominated for Des, or even before that, his role as Alec Hardy in Broadchurch, but I am so glad he's finally gotten a nomination now.

I think the reaction a lot of people had was borne out of how tied together David and Michael's performances are as Aziraphale and Crowley, and the thought that if David were to be nominated for that specific role, then one hopes that Michael will also be nominated for his role as Aziraphale at some other point in the future.

But to your comment about my keeping a level head, I find it interesting that, in the midst of all the theories flying around about why Michael wasn't nominated and questions I got to that effect, this post showed up in the tags the same day you sent me this Ask (blog name is cropped out):

This was very obviously in reference to this Ask that I received and had answered just prior to then. This person didn't even have the nerve to mention my blog by name, but had no problem calling me an "rpf fucker" (really nice...). The question pertained to whether Michael's lack of a BAFTA nom could have been because of Anna's off-putting social media posts prior to the announcement, and I indicated in my response that I did not believe this was the case. I am not about to place blame on Anna for something that she had no part of--which I suppose this person was hoping I would do, to give credence to their ludicrous claims of sexism--and I made my position on the matter clear.

So to your comment about me disagreeing, this was exactly what happened...and yet this person had to twist what I wrote so far around (to the point of lying by omission) just to make their point. And yes, I took that Ask seriously, as I take every Ask/Anon that I get seriously, even the ones that attack me (which is also why it takes me for-freaking-ever to answer the questions in my inbox). According to the above blogger, however, instead I should've responded to the person who sent the Ask by mocking them and telling them how ridiculous and stupid they are. Because just politely disagreeing while still allowing someone the space to share their thoughts is so horrible, but telling someone to fuck off is apparently the height of discourse. Ugh.

In any case, I am very much grateful for this message, and for you and everyone else who follows my blog and has been so lovely. It's your encouragement and kindness that gives me the drive to keep posting, so thank you! ❤️❤️

[naiatabris]

Day 1: "First Time"

Fellow BG3 addicts! Have you seen the BG3 February Writing/Creativity Challenge? 29 days of prompts for creativity of all kinds!

This is a little drabble that I couldn't quite mold into a full fic (it was actually a discarded part of "be selfish for me"). It technically responds to the NSFW day 1 prompt, "First Time," but it's a SFW look at how I think the leadup to the first time would have gone for Gale and my sorcerer Alys. I hope you enjoy!

***************

"I can't do this, Gale." Alys shifted away from him as she fought the urge to cry. Tears sprung to her eyes; through the moisture, Gale’s brilliant sky looked even more lovely, and seemed even more devastating. "If you're planning to kill yourself, don't ask me to help you accept it.”

"Alys. I—you know what we face." Gale's expression was sorrowful. "Gods know I have no wish to do this. But Mystra's orders…"

"I don’t give a damn what Mystra ordered," Alys snapped.

She hated how her voice sounded in that moment—childish, petulant, jealous. Once she would have thought that jealousy was beneath her. But she'd spent weeks—months, really—longing for Gale, drawn to his kindness and his brilliance, wishing he would look at her and see more than a magical colleague.

It felt hopeless, though. Alys didn't lack for self-confidence, but even she doubted her ability to compete with a goddess for Gale's heart. She didn't think he was blind to her charms; he'd given her compliments here and there, told her she was radiant after battle. But none of it had led to anything more than words, and blaming Mystra was the easiest and most satisfying way to deal with her disappointment.

Then again, Mystra damn well deserved some blame.

"I don't know what she's playing at, casting you off without a word and then popping back up to tell you to end your own life, but I am not going to help her talk you into it," she continued heatedly.

Gale’s expression pleaded for understanding; his eyes were wide and open, his expression pained. "Alys, I…"

"Stop," she ordered, fighting tears as a torrent of emotion rushed through her.

"If you would just listen…"

 "I'm in love with you, Gale Dekarios," she blurted, the words pouring from her like water from an upended jug, fast and messy and impossible to stop. "And you don't feel the same way and that's fine, but don't you dare ask me to—to sit here under a sky you made to help yourself make peace with dying."

"I made the sky for you!"

Alys had been planning to spring to her feet and storm off. But that changed things. She felt her mouth gape open in the most ridiculous way. "For… me?"

"Yes, for you," Gale said, exasperated. "Because I'm trying to tell you that I'm in love with you. Only now you've said it first and I'm going to have to discard the entire speech I had planned." He shook his head, a little smile playing on his lips despite his irritated tone. "You have the most infuriating yet delightful way of putting me off balance."

He reached for her hand, taking it in his, and Alys twined her fingers against his, scarcely daring to breathe. Gale’s eyes met hers, and she saw an apology in them.

“You really didn’t know?” he asked softly.

Alys shook her head. “I—I thought you could, maybe, if things were different. But it seemed that you had so much else on your mind. I couldn’t imagine there might be room for me.”

“Oh, Alys.” He swallowed, closing his eyes briefly. “I wish—gods, how I wish I had the time to do this properly. To say it all better, to court you the way you deserve. But time is…”

Alys didn’t want him to finish that sentence. She didn’t want to hear him say that his time was short, that his sacrifice was the only way. So she leaned forward and stopped the words with a kiss, gentle and eager, filled with all her affection and warmth and longing. 

And Gale kissed her back, and for that moment as their lips touched, it felt as if they had all the time in the world.

[cagemasterfantasy]

3rd life remastered IRL segment 2 part 1/2

A note to all of you this story is ficitonal everyone portrayed in this story (save for Slimer) is real and is used in a fictitious manner. This story is entirely satire. It is recommended to read the other parts of 3rd life remastered before reading this part. This story talks about touchy topics mainly Suicide and Self Harm. With that being said please enjoy.

After session 2 is over I exit my tent at Minecon that I've been sitting in for the past 3 hours and see Scott waiting outside for me. Scott: See you aren't in costume and we are about to sign autographs for our fans" Me: Hey alright it's hard to find a costume that's of a slime ok" Bigb: We can help with that" Bdubs: Yeah we have something for you" Me: Why are you guys looking at me like that" Tango: You're going behind the scenes and we're going to dress you up now let's go we're all dressed like our avatars you aren't and that's not fair" They then begin leading me backstage Me: Hey get your hands off of me" Once backstage I see Jimmy holding a bucket filled with liquidy green slime Me: Ok this is ridiculous JImmy: You wanted to have a slime as your avatar so we're turning you into a slime" Me: I hate all of you" bdubs: Hey lighten up you always wanted to be a slime so we're turning you into a slime" Bigb: Yeah think of it as a slime filled day of fun" Jimmy: I'm just going to dump this whole thing on you and you are going to like it" Me: you son of a bi-" I don't get to finish that as Jimmy runs up to me and dumps the entire bucket onto me Me: UGH SOME OF THAT GOT INTO MY MOUTH YOU IDIOT" Scott: Now you're a slime just like you've always wanted to be" Bigb Bdubs Jimmy and Tango burst into laughter Me: Oh you think this is funny huh?" Scott: Relax you can take a shower once you get back to the hotel"

I return to where I'm supposed to be seated and sit down a glistening green mess. The first person to approach is a girl in her teens. She has pale arms teal and yellow fingertips blonde hair and glasses on. What I don't know is this is my editor doodl3 finally meeting her after all this time. I see Rylee jump into Jimmy's lap. Me: You are a definite traitor Rylee" doodl3: Aww doggo being cute" Me: So how does it feel finally being in front of me" Keep in mind I don't know she's my editor doodl3: You're a lot slimier than I thought" Me: Blame Jimmy the Loser for that" Jimmy's eyes perk up and he looks at me Jimmy: Hey come on now I least I don't unintentionally embarrass myself all the time like you do" I look back at doodl3 Me: So do you want a picture or a autograph" doodl3: Both" Me: Alright and what's your name?" "Call me Jill" She says as she steps in front of me with her phone out me giving her a slimy peace sign" Me: Alright so what do you want me to write" doodl3: Sorry for scaring you with that video" I look flustered. Scott heard what she said and speaks up for me Scott: Excuse me young lady I am going to have to ask respectfully to please not bring up the video about him around him alright" Me: Hey Scott it's fine I don't mind talking about it but yes please choose something else for me to write" doodl3: It's been my pleasure to make you laugh and entertain you for all these 10 years" I write that down and say to her "Hey I got a proposition for you I will put a slimy handprint on this paper if you go over and insult Jimmy for covering me in slime" Scott has a grin on his face doodl3: Coming right up" Jimmy: Hello there little girl what's your na-" doodl3: Hello Loser Idiot" Everyone looks at her stunned for a second before everyone except for Jimmy bursts out laughing Jimmy: I AM NOT A LOSER" Me: Yet you never win anything"

I fall out of my chair laughing everyone else is cracking up when suddenly I feel my chest tightening and begin coughing and can't use my inhaler due to it being too slimy. Scott and Joel are the first to notice and they quickly shut up and run over to me. Joel takes off to find Grian who has my backup inhaler and as soon as he returns with it I'm all blue gasping for air. Scott: Stay with me" Jimmy: Don't die on us now buddy" Tango: Help's on the way don't worry" Joel finally runs back and uses my inhaler on me. doodl3 meanwhile looks absolutely horrified at what she saw. I get back up relieved Me: Thanks Joel" "no problem we're all here for you. Go on take your inhaler" Me: You hold onto it I'm all slimy right now and about to kick Jimmy's butt later" Jimmy: No I was doing what I had to do it's not my fault you had your mouth open" I decide to uphold my promise and give doodl3 my slimy handprint. Later she sees me getting into a cab with Impulse Scar and Tango heading back to the hotel funnily enough the same hotel she is staying at.

As soon as she arrives back she sees me get out of the cab. Me: JIMMY" Jimmy: Uh oh" We head into the lobby where I'm chasing (question mark) JImmy around a couch "Come back here. Come here I'm gonna kick your butt" Jimmy: I told you it's not my fault you had your mouth open" doodl3: Still mad at Jimmy I see?" "Oh hey Jill what are you doing here?" doodl3: This is where I'm staying for Minecon and it seems I'm with the lifers" "Probably not Jimmy in a minute while they were dressing me up in the middle of speaking and Jimmy dumped the whole bucket of slime on me without warning and some of it got in my mouth" doodl3: oh really huh? Want me to kick his butt" Jimmy: No I don't feel like getting kicked by a girl please" Impulse: Hey come on now let's all be civil about this" Me: You could have at least told me to strip to my underwear beforehand now because of you one of my inhalers got ruined and I almost died because of you" Jimmy: I didn't know what to do this was all Grian's idea" I sigh Me: Hey since we're staying here together Jill I'm about to head to the pool after I get showered off want to meet there or are you busy?" doodl3: Sure"

I'm in my hotel room in the shower full temperature there is steam everywhere. Scar comes into the bathroom and see all the steam coming from above the shower curtains Scar: Hey how hot are you making that?" "As hot as it'll get to get this slime off" Scar: You're going to turn that down right now mister" Me: Or what" Scar then flushes the toilet. Meanwhile doodl3 is walking to the pool with Cleo and Mumbo Mumbo: Really now so you're the one who edits and moderates Slimer's streams? Well I say you do a really good job" All 3 of them then hear me screaming from my room and shortly after Scar runs out laughing Cleo: What did you do?" Scar: He was in there taking a shower to wash the slime off of him and I flushed the toilet on him when he wouldn't turn the temperature down. " Cleo: Are you insane" Mumbo: He's going to emerge looking like a lobster" doodl3 doesn't do anything but chuckle at the thought Cleo: Scar I am glad you are not my roomate because you wouldn't be alive if you did that to me" Impulse: Did what to who" Impulse approaches with Lizzy and Bigby Cleo: This Pimplebrain just cooked Slimer like a lobster" I then emerge from my room in a tshirt and my swim trunks my skin red all over just as Jimmy appears as soon as he sees me he bursts out laughing. "Ryan be lucky I have asthma or I'd be chasing you around this hotel to kick your butt" doodl3 then bursts out laughing at the thought Scar: Oh no I'm so scared you're not going to hurt your Scar Wars buddy are you?" "Ryan I am going to kick your butt while you're asleep tonight you're not even going to see it coming"

At the pool everybody is in their swimsuits and ready to go into the water. Mumbo: You got your inhaler nearby?" "Yes and this one is my waterproof one and let's hope Jimmy doesn't ruin this one" Jimmy: Oh shut up" Cleo: Don't worry if something happens we're here for you" Impulse: Yeah don't worry just stay in the shallow in" Lizzy: We got you don't worry"

I stay in the shallow end with doodl3. "So what made you start watching me?" Doodl3: I love how funny you are. I especially love how you lost in tnt run to Tango" "Oh shut up I was beating him and then blocks suddenly started disappearing" doodl3: You lost miserably and you know it" I see everyone else doing a underwater breath contest and I hear the voices "Do it" is all they say "HEY LET ME JOIN IN OVER HERE" Scott enters as I shout that having just gotten ready Scott: I think you should relax It's not a good idea" I'm already under the water Scott: You idiot" My asthma begins to kick in due to the Chlorine and unfortunately my inhaler gets sucked into the skimmer in the deep end I'm now underwater screaming doodl3 is trying to pull me up to the surface along with Scott. Thankfully the others have noticed and are swimming over to me. Jimmy is in the skimmer fishing my inhaler out. The others manage to get my arm free and pull me out of the pool. As soon as Jimmy uses my inhaler on me Scott says "YOU IDIOT I TOLD YOU NOT TO GO UNDER BUT YOU DON'T LISTEN" doodl3: you really need to listen to Scott on this one" "Look I'm sorry I just felt left out" Scott: Felt left out? You could have died. Do you know how many times you've almost died and now you want to test it over some stupid contest?" Mumbo: Hey it isn't stupid but-" Impulse: You're missing the point"Cleo: You have to be absolutely insane" Me: I just don't like feeling left out and I didn't know there was chlorine in the pool" doodl3: Feeling left out? You're life is more important then being left out?" Scott: And yes there's going to be chlorine it's an indoor pool"

After a little bit of arguing with everyone I get dried off and head out with doodl3 trailing behind me to the banquet hall. When I see Rylee exit with icing on his mouth. He runs over and hugs doodl3. "Oh yeah don't mind him he loves people but who was the one who-" I see Tango eating a fruit parfait "I should have known TANGO DO NOT FEED MY DOG" Tango: It's a yogurt parfait they're dog friendly" Me: do not make yourself the 3rd person who's butt I have to kick today" "who are the other 2?" "Jimmy and Ryan" I then turn to doodl3 and say "Sorry you aren't allowed in here this is for lifers only" She just shrugs. Little do I know she IS allowed in there due to her being my editor and mod. doodl3: Eh it's fine I don't mind I got plenty of other stuff to do anyway like pet puppo" Me: Traitor" doodl3: Awwwww you aren't a traitor" Me: Well I'm going to eat and then see where the night takes me"

As soon as I'm in the banquet hall I text @doodl3 not knowing that I've been with her the entire time. The text says "man day 1 of Minecon and already I'm exhausted. I already have to kick Scar Jimmy and Tango's butt already. Don't know how much more I can take" I then hear the voices again "Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it"

end of irl segment 2 part 1/2

[sadfragilegirl]

I was trying to defend Ravi but... All what I got is just disappointments, hatred and wanted me to stop telling me to show the real truth about his scandal.

It made me very upset that I wanted to vent. I felt hurt and traumatized as a Kpop fan with Autism. Ravi is my comfort and makes me feeling safe but why does anyone trying to hurt my comfort?

And it made me think that I'm losing all hope right now.

I really tried to defend Ravi but they want to get myself be defeated and telling me that I should stop being a fan of VIXX and Ravi anymore.

I feel like...I wanted to hug Ravi again...even tighter this time... Can't you see that he's been a LOT going through while everyone sending hate and death threats and people rather put into blame to Ravi and believing the lies?! I am very mad and disappointed in you who hurt Ravi, who ridiculed Ravi or anything bad happened to Ravi.

Yes, he made mistakes and such like that but IT DOESN'T MEAN THAT YOU SHOULD SEND HATE!

Look at it now... After Ravi left VIXX months ago, KBS decided to edit out Ravi's appearance on 2 Days 1 Night season 4 and not to show reruns on episodes that shows Ravi AND turning Ravi's WeVerse accounts into an archive.

If you can't believe me to share the real truth about RAVI's military scandal...so be it. It's your loss and not mine.

This year 2024, I don't want to see ANOTHER heartbreak and losing the things that made me happy EVER AGAIN! Ravi is one of the few things that comforts me. Don't EVER think that you're going to interfere with me.

And as always, DO NOT INTERACT if you're a OT5/OT4/OT3 VIXX supporter/STARLIGHT, RAVI anti, EXO-Ls, Wheein fans and ZEROSEs who are hating Ravi because I am so sick and tired of all this bullshit.

JUST. LET. ME. FUCKING. LIVE. AND. YOU. MUST. ACCEPT. THAT. I. WILL. ALWAYS. LOVE. AND. DEFEND. RAVI.

[the-white-soul]

We've got some good thoughts already, aside from Sans. The only thing he's eager about is quitting. You can't blame him with how hard this all is, but we have to win this case despite that!

Let's see... During the war, we couldn't even manage to take one life while countless monsters died. They were also allowed to make these murders since it's a given of war, but all this means is monsters haven't manage to kill anyone until Asgore's seven souls. Humans are much more bloodthirsty, and most monsters could hardly even hurt humans if they tried. At the point when souls were taken, we were forced to do so just to live free from a barrier which was put in place for no real reason in the first place. Monsters were innocent for the longest time and beaten down on by humans for that one instance with the curious child who absorbed the soul of their already dead friend. The kid didn't even try to harm anyone with it, like Alphys said.

I'd like to say I should go as a witness as well since I also know asgore well and grew up in politics so I know how things work, but then again I didn't perform well last speech and I might ruin this again in addition to sparking some negative reactions just by showing me face.

Speaking of, d'you think people are going to try to take me for murder? Or would the police not care since that human was obviously an idiot? At least I hope it was obvious.

(Kara) "Honestly, I have no idea. How hasn't he been arrested? I'm happy about it but confused." (John) "While you are probably a criminal, you are a criminal of war, so…" (Dess) "It doesn't matter. We have great security." (Kara) "People spraypainted your house." (Dess) "They were protecting you. They are everywhere." (Kara) "Spies cost money." (Dess) "You want to know how we can afford everything? There's one monster who's so popular even some humans give him plenty of money." (Mettaton) "It's me, darlings! You can see why, can't you? I'm so glamorous it connects the world because everyone agrees I'm hot." (Kara) "Whatever pays. Now, one last question." (Dess) "What is it?" (Kara) "What will we do with the Anons?" (Dess) "I was about to ask the same thing."

(Kara) "How many problems can we handle? I feel like I'm about to explode. You can change your voice, as well. Great, now you could all be psychos. 'Hey Kara, did you have enough stress today? No? Well, let's make it so you want to pull out your hair and punch yourself so hard you'll be unconscious. Won't that be great?'Looks around and sees the monsters hiding behind a chair. Sorry, something slipped out. Now, how did you get here? Cause when one person gets in…"

(Kara) "Wait, Chara did this again?" (Dess) "Um, Kara? I don't mean to alarm you too much, but we're not hiding because of you." Kara turns around and sees Chara pop out. (Chara) "Howdy!" (Kara) "Oh shit!" (Chara) "Don't worry, I'm not here because of blood lust. Well, not now. Tee hee. I'm here because I thought a flower would've been my mailman, but he seems too afraid. Don't worry. I'll tell them. Winks. You see, I think you should take this more seriously." (Kara) "Why?" (Chara) "Oh, let's just say monsters will be free one way or another, whether it's by death or love. Most likely both. I guess you've met some of the anons. I thought about giving you a little fun because we all know how boring court dramas can be." (Dess) "Don't you want monsters having less discrimination? How does bringing more hate solve anything?" (Chara) "Well, if you can't handle a simple creature like an anon, you should give up! I promise you I'll make it quick." No one spoke. The wind could've gone 1 MPH, and everyone would've heard it. (Chara) "Okay! If you want a ridiculous trial, then who am I to judge? Good luck! Try not to die to the anons!"

[ashol33]

To be clear, I will never forgive you.

You are the second father-figure to completely abandoned him in less than a year. He woke up, went to school, and never stepped foot in his house, his bedroom, again

Fuck you.

I'm reading a book called

"Why Does He Do That?"

I highlight the things you did to me in yellow.

Orange is his dad.

It has opened my eyes. Made my jaw hit the floor.

Women who were abused by their boyfriends, husbands.

Victims talking about their experiences.

And they're saying WORD FOR WORD what I said to you. How I told you I felt. How the things you were doing made me feel.

And you made me feel fucking crazy for it. You made me out to be a piece of shit because your ego couldn't handle accepting the fact that you hurt me. You made shit up in your head and then treated me like that person you came up with was me.

You told me I was manipulative. You turned anything I did into something nefarious.

You're smarter. See through the bullshit. Stronger. Don't need to acknowledge emotions, especially mine. Cause I'm manipative. Deceitful.

It is the cycle. It always comes back to that. You're mean, I get hurt easy. I want to talk about it.

But you can't do that. Even the mention of my feelings has you doubled over crying.

How dare I hold a mirror to let you see yourself. I don't know this man anymore.

BLAME ME! I DARE YOU!

The girl in the book said she felt like she was sexually assaulted because she was.

And so was I.

You never wanted me. Or him.

You wanted somebody to fuck to make you feel good about yourself, and I am fucking done sacrificing my time, my body, my mental health, for someone who has shown and told me, time and time again, that he does not want me.

My entire perspective on you and our relationship has changed. I was naive. I took you at face value.

"A woman gets trapped into trying to make the man feel better, but nothing she can do ever brings about any lasting change in how he treats her. He still blames his behavior on her supposed flaws and insists that she's the one who has changed, not him."

"You can cause your partner to feel hurt or grumpy or even angry, but you cannot make him treat you badly."

"He calls me disgusting names, and then an hour later he wants sex. I don't get it."

"He would say that I talk on and on and that I'm self-centered."

"I just can't seem to live up to what he needs. I'm trying, but he doesn't think so. And now when he's really angry or frustrated, he says things that cut me down. ("Just looking for a man to live off,)

"The emotional effects of partner violence are a factor in more than 1/4 of female suicide attempts and are the leading cause of substance abuse in adult women."

"He justified all of these behaviors because of ways he felt hurt by her."

"He will come up with new and more creative ways to make her feel responsible for his emotional distress."

"A nonabusive man doesn't use his past as an excuse to mistreat you."

"A man who was genuinely mistreated in a relationship with a woman would not be using that experience to get away with hurting someone else."

"Most abusive men have close relationships with people other than their wives or girlfriends. Do they abuse their other loved ones?"

"An abusive man's emotional problems do not cause his abusiveness. You can't change him by figuring out what is bothering him, helping him feel better, or improving the dynamics of your relationship."

"An abuser gives himself permission to take action on the basis of his beliefs."

"Just as common as the abuser who blows up because dinner is late, is the abuser who blows up because she failed to anticipate needs and desires he hadn't even expressed."

"Why does he think you're always complaining? Because in his mind, a woman is supposed to be listening, not talking. If she expresses herself at all, that's too much."

"The abusive man has a reason to exaggerate and ridicule his partners statements: he wants to avoid having to think seriously about what she is saying and struggle to digest it. He feels entitled to swat her down like a fly instead."

"The abuser tends to see his partner as less intelligent, less competent, less logical, and even less sensitive than he is. He will say that she isn't the compassionate person he is. He often has difficult conceiving of her has a human being. This tendency in abusers is known as objectification or depersonalization."

"Uses words to assault her humanity, reducing her to a degraded sexual body part."

"He distances himself so far from her humanity that her feelings no longer count, or simply cease to exist."

"Did he just suffer a disappointment? She caused it."

"He may not demand to be served dinner, but rather erupts because of some way his partner failed to sacrifice her own needs or interests to keep him content. He plays up how fragile he is to divert attention from the swath of destruction he leave behind him."

"When he begins to control the woman and take advantage of her, he will find ways to convince himself that it's not happening or that it is her fault."

"A man doesn't tear down his partners self-esteem out of a desire to help her."

"He pressures you for sex. This is a sign that he sees women as sex objects rather than human beings. If he says you need to have sex with him to prove that you truly love him, run."

"He will say things like, 'you're just angry because you aren't getting your way, so you're saying I'm mistreating you.'"

"It will never be the right time, or the right way, to talk about your feelings."

"He denies being angry, although he obviously is."

"He tells her that she is mistreating him."

"His outlook makes it impossible for an argument to proceed toward anything other than the fulfillment of his wishes."

"She is always wrong in his eyes."

I trusted you. I took the damage, the blame for your unhappiness.

You are the cause of your unhappiness. I will not be made to feel responsible for your insecurities and sadness.

You acted like you had it all figured out. Healed the ego issues so many other men have.

YOU fucked up.

YOU are responsible for your actions and words.

You did this.

And now I have to heal from the things you did to me.

Go to therapy.

[suckerx]

2023 was the most intense year I've experienced and I acted like everything was fine infront of everyone else.

It started when I felt abandoned because of the way I behaved out of self loathe. Why can't they be there for me like I was for them? They tried but they got tired. Just because I processed pain slower than the rest, I was left behind and everyone else ran out of patience. Being negative will eventually land you into spreading negative energy, being in a toxic environment will eventually poison you. TLDR, it did.

I made an enemy at work. People who has never met me in person were gossiping about me - for the way I dressed, for my grooming, for my "personality". My photos and videos were circulated amongst people who I haven't spoken to, who barely knows me. What did I do? Nothing. Treated it like white noise. Blamed it on the industry.

I just started a career where I thought I could finally break the ceiling with. Hope. It consumed me. I wanted to be liked, that's the only way to make it, or so I thought. I had no one teaching me what to do, had to figure myself. In the medical industry where terms are foreign language, everyone important disregarded me and thought I was a bimbo. I was. Nurses and receptionists shouted at me, even if they didn't, they gave me a look that I wasn't welcomed. I was thrown out of my first solo OR case. Surgeons didn't give me any time of the day, even if they did, I was told that I was unequipped. So I studied. Slowly I picked up the ropes, saw some progress but the journey was interrupted because of how many eyes were on me and I was always told that I doing something wrong. Eventually the rumours from people who I've never crossed paths with led to my boss. A video of mine was sent with a snarky comment of "You hired someone like that?" I eventually got fired in April just when things were just picking up. I was ridiculed by that enemy in my face. However, this termination of work was merely on the papers, I could work in secret so long as my enemy in my company doesn't know. Everyone else in the company thought I would have left to better companies where politics weren't against me. I lied to all of them saying I've sent countless of resumes out. I applied to none. I barely even looked. I had 1 goal in mind, to prove that I was worthy. Sales were picking up.

This was also the time where help was offered to me. I did bend my ways to get whatever help I could get. I had nothing else to lose, I started being myself. "What's the worst that could happen, what, I'm going to get fired?" Eventually, sales picked up. I forged great relationships with surgeons and nurses, I could see that the very eyes that were once disdained became respect, some even excitement. I even made my biggest competitor a best friend at work. He taught me more than my mentors, my boss did. He even gave me leads. I gave them what they wanted in exchange for what I wanted. People in the industry were talking about my product that I launched from the scratch - "you're going to be the next big thing" "you have so much future here" - Little did they know that I am a 'mistress at work' (working in secret, that once I'm caught, this is done) I was robbed of opportunities because I couldn't attend conferences and be seen in public. I enjoyed work here back then - I attained the salary I've dreamt of, I created a community amongst my competitors. Eventually, I did so well that I was being rehired. On papers.

It was a huge pat on the back. But was I happy? No. I hated myself. I did things out of self loathe. I wanted to be chosen so badly. I fell for someone mid year but he led me on more than he should have. I got over it after because I didn't want to break the rules - don't eat where you shit. The same offer was presented by someone else and I took it, out of self hatred. I broke it.

Fast forward, I still wasn't chosen.

I also haven't gotten remunerated fully.

[sennaverstappendiary]

happy f`1-anniversary to me !! i can't believe i've been into this sport (and sport in general !!) for two whole years now 🥹🥹 !! but, the funny thing is, i can't imagine not having this sport in my life 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ this will be a very, very long post about how much f1, motorsport, and also max mean to me as a human being. please don't feel pressured to read any of this — it's just my personal love-letter to this sport 💌💕💘💕💕🥰🥰🌸🌷 !!

god, where do i even begin? this sport means a ridiculous amount to me !! i guess i'll just do it chronologically, then 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️✨✨🌸🌷

i'm dutch. before the age of 20 i've never shown any interest in sports, despite my dad and my brother having been sports fans their entire life. i actually did watch abu dhabi 2021 (💀) because my brother got really into f1 since the pandemic, and i did recognise that it was a moment to behold (i have a snapchat picture of max crying on the tyre with the caption "WHAT THE FUCK" 💀), but it didn't move-move me. in fact, i must confess my sins — there used to be a kid in my class in my first year of high school who was obsessed with max... and i... didn't get it at all. kind of laughed at him for it. 😵😵😵😵💥💥💥💥💥 keep in mind this was 2016 !!! i was a bit of an idiot !!!! but it's okay 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ i would soon start to know the error of my ways...

little bit of a jump to 2022. i was miserable. truly and utterly miserable. i've mentioned before how i suffered from anorexia prior to getting into f1, and yeah. i was also living with my boyfriend at the time, which wasn't great for me. honestly, i had to drop out of university for half a year, because i just couldn't handle it mentally. in general, 2020-2022 are years i consider lost 🥺 one memory that sticks out to me in hindsight, is my brother in the next room yelling at me that max might have ? won the championship? god, suzuka22 you were so funny. i love how i remember that.

i think the writing was on the wall when i decided to help pay for an f1tv subscription in early 2023, despite me not really watching the sport at all. looking back, i have no clue why i did that, but god am i grateful. i was at home, trying my best to recover from an eating disorder, whilst my relationship was also imploding 😵😵 i desperately needed something, anything, to provide distraction. i remember watching bahrain23 very vaguely, and i remember getting unreasonably upset at max's mechanical q2 exit in jeddah (again, extreme foreshadowing 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭), but i didn't actually get into the sport because of max. which i think is funny.

enter today, two years ago. it was a warm march night, and having to share a one-person bed with my boyfriend, i couldn't sleep. i had deleted all social media at that time, so i couldn't really scroll on social media. all i had was... wikipedia. now, my favorite dutch rapgroup has the lyric "two faces, one formula, like lauda and niki" and the song was stuck in my head. i began wondering: "who the fuck is niki lauda." 💀💀💀 well, an extreme wikipedia rabbit hole later, enter ayrton senna. i blame ayrton for getting me into f1. there's a reason my username, for the longest time, was sennaverstappen !!! prosenna specifically really caught my eye, which, of course 😑😑😑😑 the yaoi got me girl!!! lmao 😭😭😭😭 i made my tumblr a day later, i think, though i'd have to find the exact date 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ but yeah, after that sleepless night, i was a changed human being. it really happened overnight for me !!! and i'm so glad it did !!!

f1 really was the distraction i needed at the time, from all the horrible things going on in my personal life. this came to bite me in the ass in 2024, but i don't really regret it, if that makes sense?? it's a bit dramatic and also cliche, but f1 really did save my life. i met my best friends through formula one. somehow, me, who's actually really insecure and shy, found the courage to reach out to people on tumblr to talk about f1 🥺🥺🥺🥺🌸🌷🌸🌸🌷🌷🌸 and god, am i glad i did !!

i think i could talk about the way the 2023 formula one season improved my life for literal hours. let's just say, i was a bit of a loser (affectionate) at the time, and living through max's wins genuinely helped me so much; i had something to look forward to, something to be excited about, something to distract myself from the conditions of my own life 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🥹🥹🥹 now, this might sound unhealthy, because it certainly was, and if i were to start typing about my relationship i have to MAX this post would genuinely be at least 10k words long... so... uhm...

not only did i get into f1, i also started watching other sports because of f1. now, f1 is forever my sport, and will forever be my sport (or at least a form of motorsport, god i love cars and being autistic), but i also started watching football with my dad 🥺🥺🥺🥰🥰🥰 in general, i watch f1 almost always with my dad if i can, and it's extremely precious to me. it's something we bond over. hell, he started watching f1 again because of me, and now we always watch together (except if the races are early... i watched australia25 and china25 by myself haha), and we also always watch football together 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 it's so much... i love sport so much....

2024 was honestly a really rough year for me, but a necessary one. i needed to realise that mentally depending on one single guy to win in a sport wasn't good for my mental health. it was horrific, but taking a break from f1 was necessary for me, and i knew that too. i haven't talked about it much publicly, because it's a sensitive subject for me, and i'm afraid no one will understand. but, to the people who do know, who i have told, thank you for never judging me 🥺 it means a lot to me.

though i had to take a break in 2024, i realised i wanted to be back for 2025. if only because i love max so much. shit. i guess i really can't go without talking about him in this, can i?? 😭😭😭 max means. he means so much to me. so incredibly much. i have never felt this way about someone before. he hates this, but i have to say that he's such a huge inspiration to me. he makes me feel so seen. god. maybe i'll add a max ramble when i'm more drunk jdsfhsdjf but for now suffice it to say i would literally walk to the moon and back for him. sometimes, that's tough, and i'm ashamed by how much i love him. i'm trying to accept that part of myself, though. 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

jesus, this is long, and i could say so much more, but i think this is good for now. i love formula one. i love the people i've met because of formula one. i love motorsport. i love sport. this sport has taught me so, so incredibly much. i am forever grateful to have discovered this sport. i love you, formula one. i love you, formula one fandom. thank you so much for everything. i hope to be here for many, many years. 💌💘💕💘💕💘💘💕💘💕💕💘💕💘💕

🎉🥂 ♡ 23.03.2023 — 23.03.2025 ♡ 🥂🎉

thank you for everything, formula one. i am so grateful that i'm able to experience such a wonderful sport. to many, many years.