#mclaren problems

[zellaspinna]

“can this bitch stand normally for one second”- probably oscar

[girldriveroscar]

okay as someone who loves fashion pls tell me (an idiot) is oscar’s suit too small on him or are men’s suits just designed to fit when and only when they are standing upright perfectly still. like is his suit too small or did the tailor just not consider that oscar folds in half zendaya laughing any time lando is around and therefore needs to account for movement? is his suit too small or did he not realize he would be squatting on stage-thighs flexed, ass pushed back, back curved as he reaches down into a trophy case- in fabric that famously does not stretch? PLEEEEEASE I NEED TO KNOW

SUITGATE.

*zoomed in photos with some sources under the cut!*

OKAY. my unprofessional Official Suit Analysis based off. vibes. i am an idiot with you bc menswear is not my usual area of interest However. i will take any excuse to learn more about fashion

The TLDR:

id argue the suit fits Okay as an off-the-rack, especially if he wasn't doing all that moving around.

a bespoke suit (custom-made to the model's measurements) should allow for full range of movement without getting caught or restricted. a Major factor that separates a bespoke suit from a RTW is actually the height of the armhole! would highly recommend this article if it interests you.

soooo why is this suit so appealing to me? why is the fit as erotic as it is confusing?

(this is very subjective once again im no expert. just having fun. i digress.*I think*) the inconsistent fit creates a balance of sophistication and something much more salacious. the single breasted jacket is appropriately seductive; the rise height is youthful, fitting for a guy his age; the double vents look very elegant and move nicely to accentuate his hips as he puts a hand in his pocket.

but then.

his pants are so ridiculously tight that as his hand slides into his pants, it doesn't disappear -as it should- in a show of casual confidence. it just Sits there, right in our line of sight, becoming an extension of all the skin hidden in that area. the fabric becomes translucent over the bulges in his pockets (his phone, his hand) - so tantalizingly close to the center yet the effect doesn't reach far enough to tip the scale from teasing to straight up pornographic. (his ass on the other hand does tip the scale because there is simply no space in his pants for all that LOL) (to add to this, there's the erotics of everything we can't see with his shirt and undergarments but i won't repeat myself)

the lack of attention to detail leads to all these minor inconveniences that are overall uncomfortable (too much shirt fabric, bad fitting pants). the lack of care to acknowledge these problems before wearing the suit publicly then lands you in oscars position: blindsided by Just how much ass you've accidentally put on display. think like... when you unknowingly tuck your skirt into your underwear after peeing. it's. incredibly voyeuristic lol which only furthers the second-hand embarrassment i feel seeing him in a suit that's not fitting right. (and embarrassment is Kinda sexy. so.well)

that perverted eroticism in equal measure to the acceptable eroticism (its not taboo to consider a guy hotter when he's wearing a suit) just AGH come together to eat me alive.

to try? and put it simply? he's surface level hot like a law student/it guy/coworker (insert other role that we find personably attractive) and on further inspection, this is the corporate equivalent to being tied up, half naked, on display, in an uncomfortable position for hours.

so getting redundant but one more time, 🫲 acceptable hotness and 🫱pervy hotness equalssss 🤝🤝🤝 me taking Oscar to my penthouse and freaking it.

hopefully the texts not too small. lmk if it issss ill crop it more

[httpiastri]

yet again missing your oscar hand dumps 🙃

my sincerest apologies

[leclace]

i have officially decided that lando norris fans are the most annoying f1 fans on tumblr. they constantly whine that lando gets too much hate and then go on to hate other drivers twice as much

[imlittlebitdie]

The idea that McLaren should hamstring Oscar in the remaining races to increase Lando's chances of a WDC is ridiculous to me. And not just because the fact that hamstringing Oscar could very well be detrimental to his own development as a driver.

This isn't 2021 where the two contenders are so close in machinery and skill that defensive driving from their teammates is *required* for success. Yes, of course, it always helps. But in 2021 both Max and Lewis proved that -- whichever one did end up winning -- they had earned it.

It is incredibly challenging, I think, for anyone in complete honesty and with credibility to say that Lando has, on merit/skill/talent, absolutely earned this WDC or successfully made the case to be first driver.

Setting aside, McLaren mistakes, Lando has left a lot of points on the table throughout the season through unforced errors and poor starts. That's on him, and unless he can fix that, it will keep happening and other drivers without those issues will keep besting him. Including Oscar.

I can't, and won't, speak for anyone else, but unless Lando's form seriously improves over the next 8 races, a WDC for him would not feel genuinely earned to me.

[rb9]

i honestly believe lando needs to be more concerned about charles and oscar catching him than how close ehe is to max. if he’s too focused on purely beating max, he could finish abu dhabi in p4 in the wdc

[brain-works]

there’s something to be said about the fact that I can’t go on a single other social media platform that’s not this one without seeing relentless hate against Lando, no matter how many people I block or mute. when will it end, genuinely? this isn’t criticism, this isn’t mild dislike, this is full on constant, dangerous hate every second of every day. we shouldn’t be okay with this.

[easytask0]

zak thinks all the tensions on the team are solved by having oscar and lando go on dinner dates and golfing… this is rancid in a funny way, it's like a set up for an enemies to lovers trope:

they are fierce rivals, but are forced to spend more time than necessary and must pretend to like each other not only in pr videos, but also for their boss when he forces them to go on golf dates, even though one of them (oscar) has made it clear that he hates it. despite their differences they end up falling in love thanks to forced proximity and trauma bonds 💕

[blahblahbih]

Ladies and gentlemen boys and girls I’m going to LOSE MY MINDDDDDDDD

[costkappen]

Landoscar looking at each other 🫶🏻

If he doesn't look at me like this I don't want him

[crumpleduppieceofpaper58]

I love them your honor

[landoposition]

i'd cry tears of joy if pato went to cadillac after the fr*nch got him out of f1 (even if it was for the best bc imagine seeing pato suffer through the red bull family horrors)

[hyacinthsdiamonds]

"They complain a lot lately anyway" DID HE LIE DID HE LIE HE NEVER LIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[slythereen]

anyway don’t let this phenomenal start to the race distract you from the fact that the FIA confirmed mclaren illegal wings and that they aren’t going to take any further action right before the race. because i haven’t forgotten

[mecachrome]

very unserious scenes that 814 have been teammates for A Single Year and yet are already only about ~100 works behind several ships in the ao3 top 10 (sebchal c2 galex...)

[landonaurr]

That minute when life starts feeling like the Monaco GP track