#love talking ab clothes cus it Is in fact what u make it. And mary im Making it.

[girldriveroscar]

okay as someone who loves fashion pls tell me (an idiot) is oscar’s suit too small on him or are men’s suits just designed to fit when and only when they are standing upright perfectly still. like is his suit too small or did the tailor just not consider that oscar folds in half zendaya laughing any time lando is around and therefore needs to account for movement? is his suit too small or did he not realize he would be squatting on stage-thighs flexed, ass pushed back, back curved as he reaches down into a trophy case- in fabric that famously does not stretch? PLEEEEEASE I NEED TO KNOW

SUITGATE.

*zoomed in photos with some sources under the cut!*

OKAY. my unprofessional Official Suit Analysis based off. vibes. i am an idiot with you bc menswear is not my usual area of interest However. i will take any excuse to learn more about fashion

The TLDR:

id argue the suit fits Okay as an off-the-rack, especially if he wasn't doing all that moving around.

a bespoke suit (custom-made to the model's measurements) should allow for full range of movement without getting caught or restricted. a Major factor that separates a bespoke suit from a RTW is actually the height of the armhole! would highly recommend this article if it interests you.

soooo why is this suit so appealing to me? why is the fit as erotic as it is confusing?

(this is very subjective once again im no expert. just having fun. i digress.*I think*) the inconsistent fit creates a balance of sophistication and something much more salacious. the single breasted jacket is appropriately seductive; the rise height is youthful, fitting for a guy his age; the double vents look very elegant and move nicely to accentuate his hips as he puts a hand in his pocket.

but then.

his pants are so ridiculously tight that as his hand slides into his pants, it doesn't disappear -as it should- in a show of casual confidence. it just Sits there, right in our line of sight, becoming an extension of all the skin hidden in that area. the fabric becomes translucent over the bulges in his pockets (his phone, his hand) - so tantalizingly close to the center yet the effect doesn't reach far enough to tip the scale from teasing to straight up pornographic. (his ass on the other hand does tip the scale because there is simply no space in his pants for all that LOL) (to add to this, there's the erotics of everything we can't see with his shirt and undergarments but i won't repeat myself)

the lack of attention to detail leads to all these minor inconveniences that are overall uncomfortable (too much shirt fabric, bad fitting pants). the lack of care to acknowledge these problems before wearing the suit publicly then lands you in oscars position: blindsided by Just how much ass you've accidentally put on display. think like... when you unknowingly tuck your skirt into your underwear after peeing. it's. incredibly voyeuristic lol which only furthers the second-hand embarrassment i feel seeing him in a suit that's not fitting right. (and embarrassment is Kinda sexy. so.well)

that perverted eroticism in equal measure to the acceptable eroticism (its not taboo to consider a guy hotter when he's wearing a suit) just AGH come together to eat me alive.

to try? and put it simply? he's surface level hot like a law student/it guy/coworker (insert other role that we find personably attractive) and on further inspection, this is the corporate equivalent to being tied up, half naked, on display, in an uncomfortable position for hours.

so getting redundant but one more time, 🫲 acceptable hotness and 🫱pervy hotness equalssss 🤝🤝🤝 me taking Oscar to my penthouse and freaking it.

hopefully the texts not too small. lmk if it issss ill crop it more