#maybe they’re not talking about Thing because they’re talking about Equally Important Thing that they care about

[phoenixisnthere]

‘Honestly people don’t realize-‘ ‘I never see people talk about-‘ ‘How come no one mentions-‘ ‘Pretty funny how people seem to have forgotten-‘

EVERYTHING IS HAPPENING EVERYWHERE ALL THE TIME! FUCK YOU FOR ASSUMING EVERYONE KNOWS WHAT YOU KNOW AND ARE JUST IGNORING IT! FUCK YOU FOR ASSUMING EVERYONE HAS THE CLARITY AND STRENGTH TO TALK ABOUT EVERY IMPORTANT TRAGEDY HAPPENING RIGHT THIS GODDAMN SECOND AND YESTERDAY AND TOMORROW AND AND AND!

[revelboo]

ended up getting Mixmaster! Here he is, seated next to Starscream #3 and Soundwave! And Kirsten.

I'm already craving assembling more figures. they're like Lego but i can afford them

I need to grab more of the actual blind boxes 😁 Walmart’s website keeps saying they have them for under $5 until I click on them, then they’re sold out. They mock me…

Over It Now Pt 17

IDW Jazz x Reader

• Mouth brushing against yours, those big hands wandering, you’re trying to figure out if there’s any way to get him through the door in this smaller size. Out of the cold. More than wiling to find out. To drag him inside with you, because you’re not sure where this can go, but you really want to find out. “You’ll fit if I have to make you,” you mumble as his lips slide to your throat again and his servos tighten on you as his head lifts.

• “What?” He asks, slightly dazed and hoping you’re talking about what he thinks you’re talking about. Maybe not as your whole face reddens and your eyes widen slightly. ‘The house. In the house,’ you mutter, grabbing his new scarf and hiding your face against it. Swallowing back a laugh, he glances at the door. And frag it, if he can get you out of the cold, maybe then you can get on the same page he’s on. Out of those layers of coverings so he can touch you. “Sure. In the house,” he says, hooking an arm around you and standing.

• You can hear the laughter in his voice even if he’s not outright laughing at you, but now your brain’s gone there. To the implications in his confusion, his almost constant flirting, and his little candid remarks. All those tally marks you’d refused to add up suddenly making a dangerous sort of sense as he eases you down on the step and hands you the crutches. As you make your way inside and push the door open wide, it’s on the of your tongue to tell him the cast comes off in the morning. Part of you afraid still that he only hangs out around you out of guilt, because he thinks you need him. Once you don’t, he might not keep coming back. Unless you can offer him something else.

• Grimacing, as a door wing gets caught and he has to twist more to clear the narrow gap, almost lying on his side to get through the doorway. And still scraping the door frame. Now you’re laughing at him, a hand over your mouth to try to muffle the sound as he struggles and finally gets inside. And this place definitely isn’t Autobot friendly. Everything small and fragile like you as you lead him through the narrow entry space to an equally narrow hall and finally to a bigger space full of human sized, plush chairs. Part of him wanting to touch everything, to move through your space and see this part of you that’s new to him. It takes an effort to sit on the carpet in the middle of the room instead. To behave.

• Picking at the grip on a crutch with your nails, your nerve is suddenly gone. Because, you’ve never been the bold one in a relationship. Is this even a relationship? Do you want it to be? Unable to look at him as he just looks around, like he’s elated to be inside your house, you realize you do want it to be one. You like those glimpses of the real him that are getting more and more common, like hearing him open up about his past. Like when he reaches for you, handling you like you’re made of glass, and when he stares at you when he thinks you’re not paying attention, watching your every move like you’re the most important thing in his world.

• “I like your space,” he murmurs, so tempted to bring up fitting and finding out what else fits together, but not wanting to push if you’re not ready. Because you look like one wrong move will send you running. Uncertain and fidgety. So when you carefully move closer and place a warm hand on his chassis to lean in, to brush your mouth against his, it lights through him. Hands catching your hips and pulling you into his lap to straddle him, then hooking an arm around you and shifting you both so you’re on your back staring up at him, hair spread out around you and your legs still hooked around his waist like you’re not going to let him get away. “This okay?” He asks, lips brushing the corner of your mouth, aware that if you say no, he’ll drop it even it will kill him to stop. A low, rumbling noise escaping him when you just nod.

Previous

Next

[robertdowneyjjr]

when tony started working for bucky, he never imagined that anything would ever, could ever happen between them.

for starters, bucky was a decade older than tony. not that he had a huge issue with age differences, but still. tony was only in his early 20s when they met.

but more importantly, as far as tony could tell, bucky was happily married.

so despite the immediate attraction that he felt the second he laid eyes on bucky and the growing feelings he began to develop the more they got to know each other over the years, tony knew that nothing could ever come of it and that he needed to be content with just admiring the other man from afar.

but sometimes bucky would say things, or just look at tony a certain way, and he’d wonder if maybe, just maybe, the feelings he had were reciprocated.

regardless, though, he knew he would never do anything about it. there was no reason for him to do such a thing and nothing could change his mind about that.

not even when tony complained about another failed attempt at dating during happy hour one day after work and bucky said, “i could never understand why these idiotic bastards would rather waste another day getting drunk with their equally idiotic friends instead of spending time with you.”

or when bucky took him out for a celebratory lunch after signing a major deal with a new partner and their knees kept brushing under the table, and bucky just kept smiling at him for the whole meal like they were sharing a secret.

also not when they were on the phone with each other at midnight trying to salvage an important client relationship and suddenly the conversation segued into personal relationships and when tony sadly confided that he didn’t think anyone had ever loved him before, bucky vehemently declared, “doll, how could anyone know you and not love you? hell, i’m pretty sure i’ve been half in love with you for years.”

and especially not when they were on a business trip and heading back to their separate hotel rooms after a dinner with their biggest client and bucky kissed him before the elevator doors opened on his floor, and tony’s lips tingled for the rest of the night.

no, tony didn’t do anything about his feelings even after all of that because bucky was married.

then tony meets steve at a big company event, where this big beautiful blond man looks adorably lost and alone in a room with four hundred people. tony can’t help but drift closer to him and introduce himself, offer a drink, and ignore everyone else if only so he could make steve feel more comfortable in this crowd of strangers.

they spend the rest of the night together, talking for hours and giving each other meaningful and longing glances, smiling like they both know where they’d like this to go next. tony’s fingers absently stroke along steve’s hand that is placed on the cocktail table they’re leaning against, and steve’s other hand is playing with tony’s hair and sending shivers down his spine when his fingers brush against tony’s neck, and tony has to resist the urge to rub against steve’s hand like a cat.

steve has just leaned closer, lips and breath whispering across tony’s skin to speak softly into his ear when bucky finds them.

tony reluctantly pulls away from steve, refusing to feel embarrassed or guilty in any way, especially when he knows bucky likely interrupted them just so he could ask tony to get back to work. this is a work event, after all.

but then steve looks at bucky and smiles, and says, “oh hey sweetheart, finally got some time for us?”

and bucky glances between steve and tony, sees how there’s barely any space between them and grins from cheek to cheek. “looks like you’ve met my husband, doll.”

and, oh.

oh.

well.

it looks like tony suddenly has a lot to think about.

[cheemscakecat]

Bucket Scene Analysis pt. 2

Now that I’ve talked about the rest of RED, I want to look at how the Bucket Scene affected Spy; because doing everyone’s wish meant more than his teammates realize.

First of all, he came up with the idea of writing down everyone’s last wish and then working as a team to fulfill them. Spy is usually cynical and tries not to show how much he cares about the rest of RED. Scout and Pauling are the exceptions because one is his son, and one is young, naive and hopelessly devoted to that old hag Helen. Pauling doesn’t usually get positive reenforcement for working so hard, but in the comics we get to see Spy complimenting her.

[WOW they made him pale] Anyways, gathering the last wishes is a sign that when it comes down to it, Spy cares about the rest of RED team, and he wants them to die feeling fulfilled instead of downtrodden.

It’s also important to remember that Scout knows they’re all going to die. Spy’s going out of his way to make the most of these last hours, and he’s assuming that Scout will do the same since dying changes things. And, as stated in Part one, Scout was equally upset when Medic announced that they had three days. That’s why Spy trusted his son to collect everyone’s last wish. Here’s what Spy said before his day was ruined with the prank cards:

”This is a bucket.[..] It contains the dying wish of every man here. […]Gentlemen, synchronize your death watches. We have seventy hours to live. For most men no time at all. We are not most men. We are mercenaries. We have the resources. The will. To make these hours count! The clock is ticking gentlemen. Let’s begin.”

This is in stark contrast to how BLU Spy talked to his teammates in Meet the Spy, especially Scout. RED is complimenting his team and trying to uplift them before they die, not talking down to them. Which leads me to believe that he’s being sincere, not trying to make himself look good before he dies. Unfortunately, Scout decided to prank him instead of helping with this, and we see his reaction in real time.

First card- Spy is disappointed that Scout drew a joke card instead of writing his last wish.

”I have something radiating off of me.”

“Yeah, those are stink lines. That’s why the car hit him. Cause he smells!” [Heavy smiles at Scout.]

Spy is visibly upset but decides to just read the next card, hoping it’s a real one even if Scout’s is not. But it’s another more offensive insult.

Third card is yet another insult, and he’s realized that there’s probably only one useful card in the bucket. Presumably it’ll say where the real wishes are, or be a gotcha for Scout to hand him the real cards. Spy is trying to just get through them and not react to the jokes so he can get back to the task at hand. But you can tell that it’s taking the wind out of his sails.

Four cards, there’s only one left after this. Three have been sexual, which is extremely awkward coming from his son whether he realizes or not. At least two teammates at the table know this.

Card five is not in fact real, and it’s the last straw because that means Scout didn’t bother to get the real dying wishes from anybody. So Spy outright asks the others as confirmation that they were never asked. If that’s the case then they’ve wasted time and they’re back at square one. But maybe somebody will side with him because they had their time wasted.

But they don’t, do they? They smile at Scout, which means nobody is going to chastise him for being so immature. Spy doesn’t even get a verbal reply or someone shaking their head “no”. This is how he realizes that nobody else cared about this in the first place, and he’s on his own. Even the two people that know his relation to Scout don’t come to his defense.

And now he’s demoralized. His last three days on earth, he wanted to help his team fulfill their dying wishes and die with some peace. But they didn’t reciprocate. And what’s worse, they didn’t just tell him no from the start; they gathered around and let him think they might care, then reacted with indifference. And approval of his son’s cruel prank.

Imagine being in the middle of nowhere with your coworkers, knowing you’re all going to die. So you try to do one last good deed for all of them, because you care for them even if you’re bad at showing it. But they don’t respond in kind, they respond with apathy. Now you know that when all the cards are down and you’re all running out of time, they don’t care for you like you thought.

And the people you trusted with a secret, that you have an estranged son? In hearty agreement with him mocking you, even though you have three days left to live.

“See you all in hell!”

He was left standing alone. No wonder he holed up in the smoking room denying visitors. They let him down.

[cinnamonest]

Head empty no thoughts just daydreaming about incel scara with groupmate/project member!reader

Imagine them sitting together in a library. They need to be close to share one screen and go over everything while one or the other does some explaining. And scara is just DISGUSTED by her very clearly, very obviously whorish behavior aka her casually jutting her chest, pouting/biting her lips, getting close to him when she needs to lean, when she bends over away from or next to him, he can see her cleavage if he tries hard enough, or see her skirt ride or her lower back getting exposed and if he moves juuuuust a bit closer he can touch her boobs-

Just outright disgraceful and shameless behavior typical of the female 😤 and no, that's not his boner wdym. And reader is just earnestly trying to understand what he's trying to say because he seems so indifferent and almost looks as if dislikes her.

Ahhh it must be because he's annoyed, this isn't her subject after all. In which case, ALTERNATIVELY- consider CS major scara with darling in some non-STEM field passively calling her dumb and insulting her intelligence whenever they come to "study" because: what? She doesn't know how to install Windows? Ha

Only reason she has a decent gpa is because you don't actually need brains or talent for those art "subjects" and they are more suited to females anyway because it's not like they contribute much to society or are very intelligent, unlike him-

I remember my university had these little rooms in their library that were basically tiny study rooms with a couch and chairs, but like no windows, and were advertised as two-way soundproof to help you study and let me tell you. Y’all. People had sex in those. A lot. It happened a lot.

But the thing is they had no tables with desk-type chairs, only like coffee tables and lounge chairs, so if you wanted to work with someone else on something you kinda had to use the sofa which could be very awkward. Anyway

Oh he's absolutely a STEM snob that looks down on humanities majors. They’re for people with no real skills, who lack the ability to do more important stuff… or God forbid, you're a fine arts major of some kind. Very typical girl stuff, they waste money on useless degrees because they insist on having equally useless jobs. You’re probably going to be a future HR person, getting random guys fired for harmless comments and such.

So he always talks to you in such a condescending way, as if the things he’s explaining are so very obvious or simple that it’s a chore to explain it to you. You need to be aware of how intellectually inferior you are.

Also he’s one of those boys for whom “disgusted” is really just turned on, he lacks the ability to distinguish it — like it’s arousing, but it’s irritating that it’s arousing because he can’t do anything about it, so he identifies that feeling as disgust when it’s really just unbearable levels of sexual frustration compounded with bitterness. Ugh.

And as for you, it has to be intentional. You know what you're doing. It's on purpose. You just think it's funny or amusing to torment someone who can't do anything about it. In a fair world, you'd pay for your actions somehow.

And maybe you're even getting good grades in exchange for "favors." That makes sense, it's the only way that explains how you remain enrolled really. Maybe you'll eventually do the same for him, try to get him to do work for you in exchange for something. Not that that would work, he would never ever enable you like that, and definitely has the self-control necessary to reject you.

There’s something so wrong with how things are, that this situation can even arise, that you’re allowed to waste so much money and time on your dumb degree when you have better uses. He’ll probably go home and make some long vent post to some niche corner of the internet about the woes of having to tolerate this situation. Tragic.

[essence-inked]

Edit (1/15 for timeline context): Real quick note since the article with a full breakdown of everything is out and stuff about Gaiman is trending again - this post (and the edit at the bottom, made back in July) is about how people initially reacted by tearing into each other, how there was a lot of unproductive infighting, and how in the face of uncertainty, people started swinging logical fallacies around.

I want to be very clear that there is no uncertainty at this point. There is now an absolute ton of evidence that Gaiman committed both assault and rape, and I want to put this here now just in case someone shows up with fuck all reading comprehension - this is not a place for you to argue some "see, we still don't KNOW" crap, because no, by now we have a damn clear picture of what happened, and it's horrifying.

________________________________________

Alright fuck it, maybe my two cents on this will be helpful to someone.

Content warning: this is about the Neil Gaiman thing.

I'm a victim of sexual harassment and assault, and I feel like my experiences would help explain my thoughts. And also, this is mostly stream-of-consciousness, so I guess y'all are getting some personal backstory on this one regardless, because I don't have the emotional bandwidth to polish this.

The first time, when I was harassed, I came forward. The guy who'd harassed me (and from what I learned later, I was damn lucky I happened to have the confidence to keep saying no despite repeated attempts at coercion) had assaulted other people, and this ended with his victims banding together to try to bring him to justice. We had an overwhelming pile of evidence, but the administration of our college kept dragging their feet, ignored their own policies, and eventually, after a grueling fight for justice that lasted long enough for him to assault another person who joined us, he finally got suspended. Conveniently, this was right when he was graduating and it wouldn't matter anyways, but we figured that at least we wouldn't have to deal with him at graduation - that is, until the school let him walk, and he used his chance to give a speech to misrepresent what had happened. I say all this to point out that the people with the power to actually convict someone of assault are often negligent, and as much as I want to say that I'll just wait and see what the investigation turns up, just because nothing comes of this doesn't mean it didn't happen.

BUT - and this is equally as important - that also doesn't mean it did. To my understanding, "always believe victims" means "don't presume someone is lying just because you think the person they're accusing isn't capable of causing harm." It means believing victims could be telling the truth when they come forward about trusted authority figures, or loved ones, or someone who's otherwise seemed perfectly nice. It means believing that assault CAN happen. This is where my second story comes in. A couple years ago, I was assaulted by a friend. I was too shaken to come forward, and scared enough that I just wanted to move on from the whole thing. A couple months later, though, I decided to tell a mutual friend what had happened, because I was worried if I didn't, she'd have the same thing happen to her. The important bit is that she didn't dismiss me just because this was a friend we were talking about, and she sat and listened and believed that they could be capable of hurting me. The point I’m trying to make here is that it is possible for someone to seem perfectly nice and not be, and doubly so with celebrities whose public persona is the only part of them we see. And when victims come forward, it’s not about necessarily accepting their claim as fact - it’s about understanding that you shouldn’t dismiss them on the grounds that the person they’re accusing would never do that, because you could be wrong.

The unfortunate fact of the matter is that you can't just wrap everything up with an easy conclusion. Anyone can lie - Neil Gaiman can lie, the two women who accused him of assault can lie, and hell, all three of them can lie to some degree at the same time. Is it eyebrow-raising that the source of the accusations is anti-BDSM (topically relevant since a lot of this centers around kinky sex, and whether Gaiman actually got consent to be that rough), and also affiliated with TERFs (who aren't exactly fans of Gaiman these days)? Yes. Would it be fucked up to just dismiss the claims because of that? Also yes. Then there's the bit where it's more likely for people to make false accusations against celebrities, but also, celebrities live in the weird ego-boosting microcosm that would make someone more prone to be a shitty person.

The bottom line is that we don't know anything for sure, and that is something we are going to have to live with and factor into how we make our decisions. Personally, I think I'll be able to appreciate collaborative stuff like Good Omens just on the basis that it's also Pratchett's work, and some of Gaiman's books hold a special place in my heart regardless of any personal feelings about him. But also, that may be subject to change, so who knows? Right now, I'm going to take a step back, and probably poke my head back in after a few months once the dust has settled and there's a bit more to go on (but as said, a lack of an official guilty verdict doesn't necessarily mean a definitive lack of assault, and we probably won’t get a clear answer here).

I'm seeing a lot of people either say that Gaiman for sure did commit assault, or for sure did not commit assault, and not back up either statement with any solid evidence, and quite frankly I think that's stupid and irresponsible. Uncertainty happens sometimes, and it sucks, and pretending like you can reach a definitive conclusion will not actually make the situation better. Instead, you just have to do the best you can with the information that you have, and try to make the most reasonable choices you can.

Edit: just to be clear, I'm not trying to express any particular stance on Gaiman himself - the most I've got there is it sounds like when I do delve down the rabbit hole more later on, I'll probably be disappointed in him. What I care about is that I'm seeing people reaffirm their stances with claims that someone quite literally couldn't lie (both in reference to Gaiman and the women who came forward), or citing the podcast's TERF affiliations as proof that nothing happened, or saying that Gaiman just gave off bad vibes, and that's proof he did do it. And like. That sort of rhetoric is what people point to when they want to discredit victims. That sort of rhetoric is how you wind up stumbling into having a bad take at some point and not being able to think critically about it. I'm more concerned about poking my head in here and seeing an absolute dumpster fire of shitty logic in every single stance than I am about whether or not an author whose stuff I've liked turns out to be a horrible person.

Also, re: the commenter who said he admitted coersion, that'd be super useful to know, but every source I've found in my short "okay what the fuck is going on" search says he's going full denial, so I'm gonna need a quote on that one. And to that end, that's exactly why I'm holding off on going down the rabbit hole, because I want to wait til there's a bit more coverage so I can get the story in one fell swoop rather than piecemeal. And also to that end, y'all are more than welcome to toss sources on here for me to check out at a later date, or for anyone else who might want them.

[strikersexhaver]

Ok but what if striker has a s/o that is the seven deadly sins, gluttony who is curvy maybe both sfw and nsfw? 👀

Oooo- this is an interesting one! Aight bet, firstly though, I will say I’ll mostly base off the Beelzebub lore plus what we know for our reader! Like how most princesses/princes are tall, so Reader is much taller than any other demon they’re still curvy though.

As usual! NSFW under the read more cut!

spoiler warning though for the latest episode, Western Energy!

Striker’s Bee 🐝 | Beelzebub!Reader

Striker never expected to be where he is now, with one of the most powerful demons in Hell. Solely because his hatred towards uppercrust demons, like yourself.

But to him, you managed to prove to him that- there’s an exception to royals on rare occasion.

He still hates royals mostly, even with whatever you say.

But before that, Striker had met you traveling to the Gluttony ring for murderous affairs. Apparently one of his clients wanted a Hellhound dead, one of your home’s bodyguards.

You bore witness to the event on total accident, your first instinct was punish Striker as per usual with events like this.

But you were intrigued, you had heard of an event in the Richest Cup Café where an imp had attempted assassination on a Prince of the Ars Goetia.

Not being a member yourself, you had the freedom to investigate things drama-free.

Striker looked for a way to escape, but your powers prevented him from doing so. The bees of your glutinous hive prevented every nook and cranny escape.

Normally, Striker would fight until his last breathe- but he knew to hold off and wait for an opening instead. He’s may be cantankerous but he’s not idiotic.

He looked up at you, a tall curvy person who was the Prince/Princess/Majesty of Gluttony.

He only listened to you for the sake of getting out of there, until you offered to pay him for information on what’s going on. Because you do love hearing all about drama, who doesn’t? You needed your honey tea after all.

It lead from talking about what happened between Stolas and Stella, to a more normal conversation that lasted longer than you two realized.

You helped him get back to Wrath via conjuring a portal, then waved him off.

You treated him like a person, on equal grounds and didn’t belittle him- it was, strange. Albeit, he’d assume it would be for the sake of business as you did pay him for information.

Which as per usual led to conversations, meaning you two talked and communicated. You’d tried your best to make him feel- equal.

Because he despises being treated as lesser, or like a pet obviously. So don’t pick him up, or belittle him, using names you’d give to a dog he will pitch a fit.

He found himself actually liking you, and usually saying you’re not one of the other royal trash there is.

He’s love language towards you is acts or service, as he internally is ashamed he’s dating a royal. Because of how boastful he was about hating royals.

He probably wants it to be on the DL, not public and that’s good for you.

It’d be a lie to say he didn’t find you attractive, he loves holding your hips (if you shift to a smaller form) sometimes he slides an arm around your waist.

He does it with a smug smile on his face and a slight flick of his tail.

As for in the bedroom, there were complications at first- establishing boundaries were important. As Striker I can see him not liking to be bottomed on often, since he dislikes being out of control.

But he will have some moments where he is,but very few.

He’s always preferred being a dominant, which may seem awkward sometimes however with the height difference.

Y’all find work arounds, even if you have to shift to a lower height to make it less so.

He loves your body, he absolutely does- he loves kissing down your thighs

He likes fucking you rough to see your ass jiggle, it’s pleasing to him.

When you top him, he’s either a power bottom or a brat.

He refuses to get pegged by you, nah, not a day in hell. He’ll let you ride his face and hold your thighs on him.

If he’s gonna die to a royal, it gotta be this way he refuses any other way.

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

fight the future part 2

waaaah! what a point we left off on last night. i want to leave a few random thoughts here so that you must click the “read more” link and therefore i shall prevent the girlies who, like me, are only now getting around to watch txf, from major spoilers….

so, thoughts of no particular importance:

scully likes her soda sweet and takes pleasure in teasing mulder :)

mulder is a big ol softie and he seems to not drink alcohol very often (BUT he does occasionally go to the bar)

and they live in different parts of the city! i assumed they lived closer because they are always at each other's place

i like scully's outfit :)

skinner is like an uncle to me

okay, an actual recap beneath the read more link...

i left off last night with the syndicate promising to take away what mulder loves most… what he cannot live without (dramatic cut to scully). the virus is mutating and maybe earth has been a pawn of the aliens this whole time. and since mulder and scully and kurtzweil know this, they must be dealt with. dun dun DUUUUN!

girl, i don’t watch this show for the aliens, i watch it for the slowburn and vague spooky aesthetic. so i hope they figure out the black oil and what not.

but the black oil made the fireman have an alien baby… is it because he was cold? they don't usually get to keep those exposed to the alien virus cold. or is it because the virus that the fireman caught had mutated to the point of producing new life? why didn’t krycek and mulder and all the russian gulag guys have an alien baby when they got oiled up?

shrugs. who tf knows. 

so, i left off at 54:42, and now i must reload the DVD to this point in time. the DVD is so fuzzy and the captions are different from what they are actually saying which is equal parts endearing and annoying, lmao

okay. back to scully and her very cool suit in the desert. she had to have been hot as hell. 

well, it doesn’t look like much of a dig site, but mulder makes scully pinky promise that the fossils were infected with the same stuff she saw at the morgue.

insert that (it fucken wimdy) fox here as mulder’s hair and suit gets blown around in the desert

ooo, how convenient! a brand new playground right over where once a dig site lay. mulder is going to sniff around that newly installed grass, point out that it is brand new, and then talk to some local kids on bikes.

they kids say they can’t talk about it and they don’t believe that they’re FBI agents. and why is this?

“cause y’all look like door-to-door salesmen” <- LMAOOOOO, SCULLY’S SMILE I’M DYING!!

well, a quick show of the badge gets 'em to snitch. so much for the shady government's bribery for silence with new bikes. and off the agents go, in the direction these small children point.

RACING DOWN A DESERT ROAD IN A WEIRD LITTLE CARRR YEAHHHH!!!! SUCH IS THE LIFE OF OUR FAVORITE AGENTS!!!!

LMAOOOO they don’t know which way to go… scully says right and mulder says left… so he barrels ahead straight BAHAHAHHA

“fives years together scully, how many times have i been wrong? never! not driving, anyway” <- LMAOOOO this is a terrible thing for a man with no sense of direction to say 

shoutout to this little grey nondescript car going on quite the adventure

as always, i wonder what they talk about as they drive for hours and hours…. it’s night by the time they roll up to a…. fence?

ohhh, scully is mad :(

“this is great, this is fitting”

“of what?”

“i have to be in washington DC in 11 hours for a hearing, the outcome of which might possibly effect one of the biggest decisions of my life, and here i am in nowhere, texas, chasing phantom tanker trucks” <- AWW MY GIRL IS STRESSED TF OUT!! and can you blame her?!?

too bad they didn’t have zoom back then to do a virtual hearing…

she’s about to tell him she does NOT have time to track down alien viruses (and it is so funny that she straight up asks what he isn’t telling her) when a train appears!!!! time for more chasing!!!

bro is driving up a hill….. and they see something weird…. domes?? big glowy domes??? in the distance!!!!

use the large man to forge through the cornfields that are mysteriously growing in the desert!!! this is an excellent tactic, scully!!

what if the corn has smallpox? like those bees and the honey that we saw before?? please be careful!!

dome time. why does the door open right up when they approach!!! and more it wimdy time as their hair blows about!!! yeah, scully, fix that wind tossed hair!! 

the inside of the dome is temperature controlled and making a weird humming noise. mulder puts his head to the ground as if he’s listening for the floor’s heartbeat. 

NOOOO, THE BEES ARE RELEASED!!!! the smallpox bees!!!!! or some other virus-having bees!! SHE CAN’T SEE WHERE SHE IS GOING SO HE GUIDES HER THROUGH THE BEE STORM.......... OHHH MY GOD….

he asks if she got stung and her hair is all messed up :( 

what if we were coworkers and i was blinded by bees so you took my hand and led me through the storm...........

RUN!!! helicopters approach!!! escape into that cornfield!!! she gets down, but he keeps running. 

NOOO, HE CAN’T FIND HER!!!! he’s doing his famous “scully” screaming!!!! WAHHHH

(i always admire how he never seems to have to inhale before letting out the longest "SCULLLLLYYYYYYY" of all time)

after lots and lots of screaming, they find each other, and i imagine they will also swear off corn mazes for the rest of their life. which is probably fine because they didn't have much appeal anyway

NOOOOOOO, scully is almost late for her hearing, but is now dramatically trying to make herself look okay before going before the scary panel, and not appear as if she has been attacked by smallpox bees…. she wants to make a good impression :(

she’s trying to present the fossils to the panel!!! they don’t seem to like that she went back to dallas

meanwhile, mulder is back at that dingy bar. which has a big moose on the wall. to talk with kurtzweil!!!

NOOOOOO…. a bee is on scully's neck…. 

kurtzweil only guesses that the crops and bees are for spreading a virus, which is NOT pleasing to mulder. fight fight fight in the alley!!!! how do you only take a GUESS about that critical information?

OH NO, SOMEONE IS WATCHING HIM!!!

back to mulder's apartment and the fishies, and he looks through a scrapbook… he has a scrapbook in his desk?? from his father? or is it a bunch of pictures from his childhood he put together himself? hard to tell, but either way, a surprising detail for him. and he finds kurtzweil in there!!! hanging out at a picnic!! oh shit, he really must have known his father!!

(i kind of thought he might have been lying about the whole thing)

scully arrives. “what’s wrong?” “salt lake city, utah. transfer effective immediately” <- NOOOOO, SHE CAN’T DO UTAH!!!! she needs her caffeine!!

so she handed in her letter of resignation….

oh my god, i can tell i’m going to want to quote this whole thing and my fingers cannot move fast enough 

SHE DEBATED ON EVEN TELLING HIM IN PERSON??? she was just going to DIP??

“we are close to something here! we’re on the verge”

“you’re on the verge, mulder. please don’t do this to me” ohhhh…. oh scully….

WHAT?!?!?!??

“i need you on this” “you don’t need me, mulder. you never have. i’ve just held you back” <- YOU CAN’T SAY THAT??? YOU DID THE SCIENCE AND FOUND OUT THERE WAS A VIRUS?? look at his face when she says that…..

oh, he is not going to let her walk away!!!!!!

(what is on his wall…. it looks like some sort of architectural art print thingy)

angry man follows her out!!!!

“why did they assign me to you in the first place, mulder? to debunk your work. to rein you in, to shut you down” 

“but you SAVED ME!” <- OH MY GOD….. i knew she saved him, we all knew she saved him, but to hear HIM tell HER that information will make me fall to my knees and WEEP

“as difficult and frustrating as it’s been sometimes, your goddamn strict rationalism and science have saved me a thousand times over” OHHHHH MY GOD…. tell her what she means to you…

“YOU KEPT ME HONEST. YOU MADE ME A WHOLE PERSON” MY JAW DROPPED????? did he feel like a half person before her????? oh my GOD?? i feel like i always type "tell her what she means to you" and it NEVER happens, which makes this incredibly satisfying to hear

“i owe you EVERYTHING. and scully, you owe me nothing” OH MY GOD???????? oh my god. hey hi guys!!! can you hear me screaming??

(augh... still losing it over this line after watching it all. the writers so clearly favor him and his worldview and just writing his character in general so to hear mulder acknowledge that he owes scully is just... so perfect)

“i don’t know if i want to do this alone. i don’t even know if i can. and if i quit now, they win” 

oh she’s crying….. and they hug…….. and he bends over to hold her head…. 

AND SHE KISSES HIS FOREHEAD…….??

(still screaming about this btw. stand on your tippie toes to kiss that freak, scully. oh, the intimacy of a forehead kiss, it's always going to punch me in the gut)

and he holds her face while she cries…. are they gonna kiss……. OH MY GOD THEY’RE GOING TO KISS?? THE MUSIC GOT ALL INSTRUMENTAL??

NOOOOO!!! something happened. okay, hold on, i need to watch all of this again for my own sake. 

she got stung by the smallpox bee, but hold on. i need to see this again. i need to see this man desperate and telling her she deserves the world once more. look at her crying. oh my GOD. are these tears of goodbye??!!! and the forehead kiss…. how he puts his hands on her face, and she has a hand behind his neck……. 

AND THEY BOTH LEAN IN FOR THE KISS, BUT HE APOLOGIZES…….

“ow! jesus!” “i’m sorry” oh, he looks so embarrassed to have violated a boundary- OHHH MY POOR MULDER, YOU SOPPING WET TEDDY BEAR- so she clarifies that “no, something stung me” 

she pulls the whole bee out and he peeks into the back of her shirt to try and see what happened, rubbing the back of her head to comfort her (hey guys. oh my god??!? are we all seeing this or is this some sort of figment of my imagination??)

“mulder? something’s wrong” he’s still grabbing her shoulders and he says “what” so softly…

“i’m having lancinating pain in…” “what?” “my chest”

this diva… she might be dying but she is going to use the medically accurate words for what she is experiencing… and i love that about her <3

“my motor functions are being affected” she says as he’s trying to hold her, panicking, saying her name 

oh my GOD (again. hey god. i keep invoking your name. i just wanna say thank you for these characters) he lays her down on the floor, but she has just enough energy to say that she has no allergies, so this cannot be anaphylactic shock!

NOOOOO!!! he calls 911, but as they take her into the ambulance, the paramedics think it’s an allergic reaction and are ignoring mulder when he says it might be a virus!!!!!!!!

WHAT THE FUCK??? THE DISPATCHER PULLS OUT A GUN AND SHOOTS HIM IN THE HEAD????

my jaw is ONCE AGAIN on the floor………… what the fuck!!!! how are they going to get out of this sticky situation!!

meanwhile, an infected body is being brought somewhere…. to CSM!!!

WAIT, SHIT, IT’S SCULLY????????? i thought it would be the fireman from before who exploded!!!!

WHERE ARE YOU TAKING HER, YOU SICK FUCK??!!

who is bickering over mulder……? THE LONE GUNMEN YAAAAY! “cowardly lion, scarecrow, and… toto” <- AWWW he can’t even be mean to byers because everyone loves him 

so they must not have aimed at his head very well if he can still speak...

he wants to go get scully now, but ENTER SKINNER!!! “mulder, EASY, EASY, you’re staying right there!!!” <- OHHHH SKINNER…. this man wants to just go find his partner, but needs skinner to remind him he literally almost JUST died…….. skinner points out that "they" will know if he leaves!!!!

“tell me where she is, i’ll look” “i don’t KNOW WHERE SHE IS, but i know someone who might” (oh, he’s so whiny when he says that………)

(god. after seeing it all, i'm imagining skinner going instead of him to find her. i mean, i know mulder never would have let that happen, but just picture some sort of alternate universe where it did, and all of the things that i write about next took place between skinner and scully... it would have been very interesting)

((and my god, skinner's desperation, offering to go in his place...... he really loves them both. i get choked up about it))

langley wants to help. “what can we do?” “you can strip byers naked” “what?!” “i need your clothes” AWW, POOR TOTO!!!

i have rewatched this scene like 5 times because they put crack in skinner forcing him to lay back down. mulder takes off the bloody headband…….

and he gets out wearing byers slash toto's clothes!!!! run, run man who just got shot in the brain!! i am sure that this is a good thing for you to be doing instead of resting!!! (heavy on the /s)

i know skinner was mad as hell to see him go LMAO. alas. he is an unstoppable force.

kurtzweil is loitering about an alley, presumably waiting for mulder, when WELL-GROOMED MAN APPEARS!! leave him alone……. but no, he is not alone, for someone else pulls into the alley…

mulder’s at the bar, and it seems his presence has killed the party vibe. he runs out the back, looking for kurtzweil, but well-groomed man is closing the trunk!!! he says he’s come and gone!! oh lord!

well-groomed man says that if mulder gets in the car, he will give him the location of scully and how to save her……… and he gets in the car, very suspiciously… where are they taking him?! this has to be a trap. 

well-groomed man says he has vaccine and her coordinates. and it has to be administered VERY SOON. 

so it’s NOT smallpox in the bees this time, it’s an alien virus from the original inhabitants of this planet.

so the aliens never fully left?? because they were the first ones here on earth. they went underground and evolved into a pathogen??? waiting to be reconstituted and use us as hosts. and we have no defense. 

huh! answers! how rare are those for this franchise? i still wanna know about the alien bodies with the vaccine scars in arizona, though, from the anasazi arc. i have a feeling they will never come. but i WANT them.

so, well-groomed man (and i assume the rest of the syndicate) thought that the mass infection would simply make us a slave race, but it began to gestate?? 

man. y’all gotta stop trying to make scully have babies. make mulder have the babies. he has the oil in him!!!

so they’ve been working to secretly develop a cure. but mr. mulder didn’t buy the whole plot.

“he sacrificed my sister. he let them take samantha”

“without a vaccination, the only true survivors of the viral holocaust will be those immune to it- human-alien clones. he allowed your sister to be abducted to be taken to a cloning program for one reason”

“so she would survive… as a genetic hybrid” 

OH SHIT!!! so was mulder NOT the favorite child??!

not sure how i feel about getting so much rapid fire plot explanation in one hefty dose after a slow and tiny drip for 5 seasons. and the retconning this does of the existing lore...

“your father chose hope over selfishness. hope, the only future he had: his children” <- well. he still let the aliens take her. like, i get maybe he was trying to do the right thing, but i’m not sure how much that’s worth when that was his baby girl that he gave to the aliens.

and he hoped that mulder would fight the future (woohoo!! they said the name of the movie!!) and uncover and stop the project. no fucking pressure, right?? geez. mr. mulder and i need to fight it out.

well-groomed man says that soon he will die, and that he is telling mulder about this whole evil plot for the sake of his own children, hoping he can stop it. but he doesn’t answer where kurtzweil is… 

mulder would like to get out of the car NOW. is he gonna hitchhike from some random alley?

OH SHIT, well-groomed man says he was ordered to kill kurtzweil AND mulder, and he WHIPS OUT A GUN and KILLS THE DRIVER?!! BLOOD!! AND BRAINS!! ALL ABOUT!!

“trust no one, mr. mulder”, he says

so the colonists don’t know the vaccine exists?! i guess that gives them hope! they just have to make a ton of it!

"find agent scully!!!! go now!!!" (well-groomed man pulls out his little gun again and tells mulder to gtfo)

OH SHIT!!!! he gets back in the car and it blows up!!!!!!!!!!!

look at that rumpled, bloodied mulder on the ground…….. his shirt unbuttoned a little at the top….

it is a good look.

RIP my bestie well-groomed man… sorry i called you the wrong name for 800 years… it was for consistency’s sake…. you weren’t a great guy, but i guess you did what counts in the end

(unfortunately i knew he was going to die because that time i googled his name to make sure i was spelling it right (and i wasn't), i sadly encountered spoilers. but this is still a bummer. now his grandson has broken legs AND no grandpa. rough day for the kid)

let’s go to antarctica now!!! LMAOOOOO it’s mulder in a big jacket driving a…. thingy!!! he’s gonna find her, don’t you fucking doubt it for a minute!! even if the fuel is low and it is hard to see!!!

(after seeing the whole film i'm laughing because they did not include any context at all as to how he GOT to the end of the world right away to go rescue her. i am pretty sure you cannot simply roll up to antarctica, especially on such a time crunch. but you know, i guess the plot had to happen)

NOOOOO the fuel 💔 he's all out!

okay, so he’s at the exact coordinates where well-groomed man said he would find scully, but doesn’t see anything except for a rocky hill. climb that hill!!! see what is on the other side with your binoculars!!

and what is on the other side? igloos!!!! and vehicles!!!! it looks like the empire strikes back out here!!

NOOOOOOO, he falls into a sinkhole!!!!!!! not after he just got shot!!!!! this has to hurt so bad!!!! his poor head!!!

he decides to go deeper into the cavern, where i fear some aliens may be in there. 

me, anytime i see a cave system: oh, this is JUST like skyrim

he finds a whole labyrinth with all sorts of cave and crypts and people buried in the snow……….

back on the surface, it’s CSM driving the antarctic buggy thing outside the igloos? wow. he is multi-talented, i guess. i wonder when he got his cold weather buggy driving certification. his resume must be so long

mulder is still exploring this… underground city thingy. it looks like blackreach. to me. there’s some sort of conveyor belt thingy. 

he must find his scully!!!! and not slip…..

NOOOOO, he fell down a giant slide!!! AGAIN, his poor head!! please don’t fall into the abyss!!! is the vaccine okay??? did it crack and spill everywhere? eeek, that gave me vertigo!!!

okay, so death by falling from a tall place has been narrowly avoided.

NOW WHERE IS SCULLY???? he finds her clothes and her necklace!!!!!

these people are in ice cubes, and she must be in there somewhere!!!!

he found her in an ice cube or glass tube-y looking thing all naked and frozen, and he’s bonking it, trying to get to her :(

CSM realizes there is some sort of breach while mulder is trying to break scully free from the goop and ice. and he is trying to inject her with the vaccine…. is she even in there???? 

oh my god, there is some sort of like… tube thing?? it’s coming out of her mouth???? 

oh my GOD, stop torturing her!!!!!!

(gagging thinking about the mouth tube in retrospect. icky!!!!!)

he breaks her free!!!! “cold. i’m cold” “i’ll get you out of there” SHE IS GOING TO FREEZE!!! WE NEED TO GET HER A BLANKET NOWWWW

CSM says everyone in the base needs to evacuate NOW, but mulder won’t make it out, so they don't have to bother trying to track him down

god, he’s laying her down like the pieta, and wrapping her in his coat….

(i hope he pocketed her necklace; i couldn't tell if that happened or not)

the scientists and CSM are fleeing as mulder tries to haul her up the ladder…. but all of the goop and ice chambers are melting!!!!! the aliens!!! they will get loose, won’t they??

she says she can’t keep moving, so he hauls her over his shoulder…….. but the alien!!!!! 

she can’t grab the vent because she’s out cold!!!! and the alien is getting mad!!!! there is no time for all of this!!!!!

mulder must give scully CPR while the angry beasts look around……..

SHE OPENS HER EYES!!!!! and he's holding her head, telling her to breathe…

“mulder… i had you big time” <- OHHHHHHHHHHHH MY GOD…. their smiles at each other…………

(this will devastate me for a few centuries at least)

meanwhile, all of the aliens are breaking free, and they are mad!!!!!! are they going to get his legs??? 

crawl through the vents!!!! get out into the ice!!!! pull that poor scully around like a rag doll before everything blows up!!!!!

it’s all falling in and the ice is collapsing!!! run, mr. track star, run!!!!

NOOOOOOO, THEY FALL!!!!!!!

so this whole base thing they just escaped from.... it’s a giant UFO??!!!!!!!!!!!!!! which is now flying away from them???!!!?

he wants scully to see, but she can barely open her eyes….

(appreciate the commitment to preventing scully from seeing these things LMAO)

are they just going to lay down and die out here??! holding each other????

now she’s holding him!!!!!!!!! cradling his head!!!! ANOTHER pieta tableaux!!!!!! oh!!!!! how tf are they going to get out of there???????

GIANT HOLE where once a spaceship was!!!!!

well. SOMEHOW, they escaped. and how? this is never answered. which, like the lack of context as to how mulder got to antarctica, is deeply amusing to me. the writers didn't think about it that hard. i feel like they never do. still, i feel deprived of a scene where skinner comes and saves them!

scully is before the hearing team again!!! they don’t believe her report!!

so they’re burning down the crops and saying that they cannot investigate what she wrote in her report.

she angrily approaches and presents the honey bee, saying she doesn’t think the FBI has a team that can handle the evidence she has presented!!!!!!

skinner looks at the lady in charge... what does he want to say to her……..

and mulder reads a news report about the “fatal hanta virus outbreak in northern texas” being contained. was he waiting for her??? outside of her hearing!!! :(((

they’re just going to bury this, too…… she told them everything

she wants to go over their heads, but he doesn’t!!! “how many times have we been here before, scully? right here, so close to the truth. and now with what we’ve seen and what we know, to be right back at the beginning with nothing!”

“this is different, mulder”

“no, it isn’t! you were right to want to quit, you were right to want to leave me, you should get as far away from me as you can. i’m not going to watch you die, scully, because of some hollow, personal cause of mine. go be a doctor. go be a doctor while you still can” 

“i can’t. i won’t. mulder, i’ll be a doctor, but my work is here with you now. that virus that i was exposed to- whatever it is, it has a cure. you held it in your hand. how many other lives can we save? look…. (she grabs his hand) if I quit now, they win”

so they walk off, holding hands :,)

WAHHHHHHH. "my work is here with you now" (LOUD SOBBING. SHE FOUND HER PLACE IN THE FBI)

cutscene to tunisia, where CSM finds another cornfield in the desert!!! so there must be more of these dome thingies. ohhh, they know him in tunisia. and he brings up mulder; “oh that name, again and again” LMAOOO get him random tunisian guy

“one man alone cannot fight the future” <- YEAH, WELL HE’S NOT ALONE. HE HAS SCULLY AND THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP. IDIOT!!

(CSM hands a paper to the tunisian guy, who walks away sadly)

it says…. X FILES REOPENED!!!!!!!!!!! YEAHHH BABY, WE ARE SOOO BACK!!! go sadly smoke in a desert cornfield, you murderous dweeb!!!

THAT IS THE END????

wait, hold on i better watch the credits for all this. there is even a song playing. and it sounds very 90’s. 

so!!! they simply moved to a new alien plant farming base in tunisia???

so where do we go from here? how are they going to destroy all the other domes of evil bees and toxic corn and alien bases? what about the aliens who got loose from the collapse of that ship? did they get crushed or are they Out There? will the alien colonists know that there is a vaccine now because scully was saved, or will the humans be able to cover it up?? i have so many questions as to what just happened and also what will happen next!!!

(pauses to cheer at gillian’s name in the credits)

blythe danner is a hell of a name. 

woah…. what am i thinking about?

i am thinking about how scully wants to save lives. forever and ever. and how mulder wants The Truth, and therefore their wants intersect, even if they approach it through different methods. and i am thinking about mulder wrapping scully’s naked and frozen body in his jacket and then stopping amid alien explosions to give her CPR. “had you big time” 

and i am thinking about how there was no in-story explanation for them getting out of antarctica. but you know what? it doesn’t matter 💔

(i lied. it does matter to someone like me who needs continuity or my eyeballs start twitching)

and i am thinking about scully steadying mulder on their commitment to move forward. 

and i am thinking about the scene in the hallway, the way he told her that needs her, that he is nothing without her…

wait, what the fuck? i left the credits on, and now the foo fighters are singing 

okay. “i’m on your back”, they are singing. right, right. 

see, i was really lost in thought there, but the fighting of the foo just threw me off. 

oh my god. “i cannot be without you, matter of fact”, they sing, and yeah, that’s Them. 

thinking of scully cradling his head as he lays in the ice…… 

thinking of the attempted kiss, and how mulder apologized because he thought he was violating a boundary (especially after scully had told him to “go home, you’re drunk” a few days before) and how he thought he somehow hurt her, but it was a sting!! it wasn't him that hurt her or broke her trust!!! and how scully described all of her symptoms with medical accuracy as she fell so that he could tell the doctors what she was feeling…

and i am also thinking of skinner trying to shove mulder back into the hospital bed………

wow. i have so much to think about. forever and ever. and i can just rewatch this whenever i want.

so, what did i actually think of the movie?? i liked it!! the dialogue was great and the character development was (chef’s kiss). it was weird to have so much plot when we are used to all of the alien stuff being slooooowly drawn out. and then well-groomed man was like “let’s have a story time in the car before i blow everything up!” which felt tonally off after 5 seasons of veeeeery slowly learning information about the aliens and the syndicate (and then half the time, whatever we do learn about the overall mythology of the series is immediately called into question, leaving us with only murky ideas, such as "there are aliens" and "they can change shape" and "the green goo kills them")

what matters is putting our characters in a situation and seeing how they play out. i don’t really tune in for the aliens. and while i do wish there was more consistency in the myth arc, again, ultimately that is not what i’m tuning in for. i watch for the undying devotion and some general spookiness.

so the aliens turning into people, or oil going into people and growing into aliens... or the oil BEING the virus that mutates and gets you alien pregnant... i don’t really understand that. so they had to cut krycek’s arm off so he didn’t grow an alien baby? and mulder, like, burned his out or something?

or was it the virus that causes you to grow an alien??? and that virus is from the bees and not from the oil? but the fireman that had the whole chest burster thing was hit by the OIL, not a bee!! did they put the oil in the crops and then the bees pollinate the crops and then they sting you and the oil goes in?? or is it evolved from the virus???

girl. i just don’t know. 

skinner :((((( my uncle :((((((

AND THERE ARE EXTRA FEATURES!!

oh boy, i will surely have lots more to say at some point in the future, but now i want to see the EXTRA FEATURES. this is big for me, because i barely know anything about the behind the scenes stuff. so i shall learn here and now.

[whateverisbeautiful]

There was so much joy in Richonne’s reunion an TOWL did a great job showing the interplay of complex trauma and fear. What do you think will be the biggest challenges or adjustments for Rick, Michonne and their children now that they are reunited?

Great question! I gave it some thought for each of the family members and this is what I can see being their notable challenges and adjustments ⬇️💗:

Rick:

There are a few things I can see Rick wrestling with and having to navigate now that he’s home. One that first comes to mind is that Rick will probably be dealing with the challenge of seeing how close his kids feel to other adults who actually got to witness them grow up. I can envision exchanges Rick has with people in the group where they might want to tell him stories about RJ and Judith when they were younger and I can see those stories making Rick really smile while also making his heart break that he wasn’t there.

I feel like it will be this conflicting thing where Rick feels so grateful to people like King Ezekiel, Jerry, and Daryl (once they’re reunited) for looking out for his kids, while also knowing it stings that RJ and Judith know these men better than they know him and maybe even have more of a natural inclination to turn to these men as trusted figures at first.

Like if King Ezekiel was their guardian for however long between the TWD series finale and TOWL, I can see there being moments in the beginning of the Grimes being reunited where maybe RJ innocently thinks to seek out the king’s help before Rick's.

The good thing is I think it won’t take long before RJ and Judith develop a trusted tight bond with Rick to where they feel not just equally but more comfortable with their dad than they do with the other adults who helped take care of them while Richonne was away. And one of the many golden qualities of both Rick and Michonne is they both are good at doing something productive with their feelings. And so Rick wouldn't sulk over the time he missed, he'd make a real effort to learn all he could about his children both from RJ and Judith themselves and the people who know them so that he can be the best dad he can be to them and establish a genuine closeness.

Michonne:

I think a challenge for Michonne might be navigating how much her kids have grown and evolved while she was gone and how their interests and maturity have changed. There might be fun things they loved to do together before she set off to find Rick that Judith and RJ feel too old for now. At their ages, kids change so much in a year so I can see it being tough to know her babies did a lot of growing up in her absence.

After being away from them, I’m sure she’ll want to spend as much time as possible with them and fortunately, Rick and Michonne made it back at a time when RJ and Judith weren’t yet in that teen phase where being around your parents is “lame.” They’ll get to have that valuable family time and make childhood memories with the kids, but it'll be an adjustment to see the kids only become more and more independent. Michonne was really good at knowing how to talk to Carl when he was a tween/teen and prepping Judith and RJ for the real world while maintaining their childhood, so I think she’ll navigate RJ and Judith getting older well, while also forever viewing them as her babies.

I always got the sense that Michonne really does see RJ as her little baby no matter how big he gets, and I feel like that’s an area where Rick will be helpful because I feel like he’ll help guide through RJ’s evolution from a little boy to a man. Even tho of course RJ has time cuz he's not even double digits yet. 😊

A big positive adjustment for Michonne - she’ll no longer be raising two kids alone. When it comes to raising the kids, I feel like discipline will be an interesting thing for Rick and Michonne, and the kids to navigate at first because it’s always an important part of raising children but Rick will be so new to the kids and they’ll be so much more familiar with Michonne’s discipline. They’ll have to figure out how Rick fits into that when it comes to discipline, but the way Michonne and Rick are a well-oiled machine in any role, I think they’ll figure it out in the best way and strike a great healthy balance as parents to RJ and Judith. 

Judith & RJ:

For the kids, I think the biggest adjustment will of course be having their father actively in their lives and navigating what the family dynamic is now that they’re being raised by two parents. (At the start, Judith and RJ will also probably have to get used to Rick staring at them in awe at times. 😋) I think similar to what I touched on about Rick, they’ll have to adjust to having Rick as the go-to male figure in their lives.

Also, something new they’ll be getting used to is their mom being not only a mother but a wife. I think that’ll be a good adjustment tho. I think they’ll really love getting to see their mom happy and cared for by their dad.

As Judith and RJ get older over the years, who they become and how they’re similar and different from their parents would be interesting to see. In my mind, RJ becomes especially similar to Rick, and Judith becomes especially similar to Michonne. And then I’m really curious what that transition from minor to adult is like in that world. Like I don’t know much about the Commonwealth and if they have things like college but when Judith arrives at those college ages I wonder if she’ll want to move out or at least experience something away from home.

I can see both Judith and her parents wanting as much time together as possible after being apart for so long, but whenever that time comes to leave the nest I’d be curious how they all navigate that. I think it would be so special for Rick and Michonne to see their kids grow into well-adjusted happy thriving adults, especially after Carl and Andre's childhoods were cut short. And above all, I think the Grimes will definitely be a family that stays close-knit no matter where life takes them going forward. 👌🏽😊

[bookishjules]

wait i just realized that izzy won’t be anyone’s suggenes :(((( jace needs to do some charity work and pick her to be his

izzy is close to everyone in the gang (except maybe magnus) but everyone has someone they’re closer to :( she’s the heart of the group fr

gosh.. i mean it's one thing to not be any of her best friends'/siblings' suggenes, but the implication of that?? ouch :( like obviously simon is exempt from the "everyone has someone they're closer to" because she and clary are on pretty equal footing in that regard, but he's literally the one she'll be marrying. like.. gosh i wish i could reference my own fics without feeling conceited.. but basically there's this thought i've explored before about izzy comparing her marriage to what it must feel like to have a parabatai. just bc she's never had someone THAT close.

i think that's something (among many) that the show really didn't understand. having clary ask izzy to be her parabatai is kinda counterintuitive to izzy's whole role in the story. a character who acts as glue the way izzy's does isn't usually meant to be anyone's best friend. and it's important that the character whose needs she's sometimes the only one to put first is the one most commonly and repeatedly viewed as an outcast.

she really is placed so much at the center of their little gang. it's amazing how much her role in the narrative is defined by her heart. everyone else has demons and enemies and expectations, but izzy is positioned at the heart, battling it out with the things that make them human more than anything (in the shape of the narrative i mean). grief and forgiveness and anxiety and love. not that everyone else isn't dealing with these things, but they play out prominently for her, tying all the rest of the gang together with that heart ..i don't think i'm saying this right. but i really think i could write a whole essay on this topic and i don't want it to get to long-winded

(also as an aside, i do think izzy is close with magnus. i think there's an ease about the way they interact and talk about and to one another that implies that. they have some things in common that go beyond their mutual love for alec, and add that to mutual respect.. i mean she's definitely not at the top of the list for him, but there is something to be said about that bil/sil relationship imo)

[12boogaloo]

Okay, I cant take it anymore. The brain rot is REAL

Been on a writing hiatus since 2019 or 2020 (I honestly don’t remember so don’t @ me)

And what gets me to finally start writing again?

You guessed it ladies, gents, and serpents!

Fucking TROLLS 3

Let’s get this bread or die trying y’all 😈

~•~

So first things first: I didn’t come up with the AU’s I’m using here! They were created by TheMiraculousMat and Keebsification on here and AO3

The AU’s in question are The Eldest and The Youngest and Out The Train Wreck

I just love it when people see John Dory and think “hmmm yes this grown man can fit so much eldest daughter energy in him” cuz SAME

So I thought: what if I just… put em together? OTT! JD and E&Y! JD have a grip on my soul and I’m filling a formal complaint in the form of fanfiction for not just 1, but 2 other pieces of fanfiction!!! Cuz why not

I’m gonna post the notes I’ve had about this idea for the past 2 week, at least the first part.

Well… it’s half notes, half chapter really…

Maybe. MAYBE. I’ll clean it up and post it on AO3. Maybe… probably lets be real

Anyway. Y’all can call me Boog and this is Project: Hyperfixation Won

Actual story name pending…

~•~

Part 1: Author’s Actual Notes because they are a nerd

Got an idea

Gonna scratch the itch

Half brain rot dump and half story here

Combination of the Eldest and Youngest JD and the Train Wreck JD

I also head canon that trolls have tails and claws and fangs

They’re lil creatures

Basically the same stuff happens in TW with the manager and John being Branch’s father.

Branch grows up knowing JD is his dad while everyone else thinks they’re brothers.

He and Luka are dating. He’s basically Branch’s other dad.

Luka gets taken and John thinks he died. He keeps his glove to remember him.

The fight still happens. John still leaves but promises Branch that he’ll come back.

He goes to the Neverglades for the next four years.

When he gets a letter about Rosiepuff and Branch he immediately heads back to the tree to take care of him.

Pretty much all of E&Y happens but with the change of Branch knowing JD is his dad.

Makes the trauma of him leaving worse in a way which adds to the angst of the first parts delicious, but it also makes their bond really solid later on.

John forgot that everyone in the village knew them as brothers until Poppy asks him if John is Branch’s daddy out of the blue. He panics and says “no” on instinct and they both decide to just go with it. Easier than explaining it to everyone.

She still doesn’t know. Nobody does.

John still loses his arm trying to save Creek(nasty ass).

One morbid silver lining John felt was that at least it wasn’t the hand he wore Luka’s glove on. Small miracles. Lol I’m sorry

Branch doesn’t remember Luka anymore, at least not really. He sorta remembers a burgundy haired troll that he thought was important but couldn’t remember anything else about them so he didn’t think too much about it.

John doesn’t really like talking about him and Branch hasn’t ever asked so he doesn’t bring it up.

He starts dating Hickory and he does tell him about Luka. He admits that while he definitely is falling for Hickory, a part of him will always belong to Luka and their relationship will always be really important to him.

Hickory is more than okay with that and even tells him that he would’ve loved to have met the man that made his sweetheart so happy and kept him safe before it was his turn. (John just about cried when he said that same buddy and agreed that they’d probably get along pretty well.)(He shows Hickory pictures of him and Luka one day and they laugh over the fact that John clearly has a type.)(And, based on Hickory’s own light blush, same.)(He immediately said Luka was ‘real cute’ and John still laughs at him for it.)

He also tells him about Bold and how Branch came to be. (Hickory spent solid hours comforting him afterwards and spent an equal amount of time thinking of ways he could get Dickory to help him torture the bastard if he ever saw him.)(He decides in that moment that he’d do anything to protect his boyfriend and his son. Anything.) (He’s also even more grateful to Luka when he hears about how he protected his love the day they met. He really wishes he could thank him…)

Branch makes jokes about not calling Hickory his stepdad till they get married, which makes John flush bright blue. (Hickory just laughs and winks, the traitor.)(Hickory secretly really wants Branch to call him ‘Pops’ and he’s so obvious about it.)(Branch finds it hilarious and doesn’t on purpose. He’d actually love to call him that, he’s just being an ass.)(You’d think he wouldn’t ever want to but no. For some reason, it’s only thinking of Hickory as ‘Papa’ specifically that makes him feel wrong. Like that’s not available to him. I wonder why.)

After saving Floyd, the boys all start spending more time together as a family. Floyd and Clay move into the bunker with John and Branch. Bruce still lives on Vacay Island but he tries to visit at least once a week, even bringing his wife and kids with him if he can.

They still love doing shows together and will do a big one every two weeks at least.

A few months later, they’re getting ready to hangout together after a performance in PopVillage. Hickory isn’t with them, he was actually watching with Tiny in the crowd, so he can’t see them.(Lil dude is really attached to his “Uncle Cowboy” and “Uncle Johnny” it’s adorable.)(And yes Guy is close by, Tiny is still very very grounded.)

Poppy wants to introduce them to a former stage manager that she’s worked with before that had come to see the show from TrollCity. Branch has met him once before and thought the guy was weird and a little creepy but nothing else made him feel suspicious so he kinda just ignored it. He figured if Poppy trusted him, it was fine. (Obviously he still kept an eye on the old bastard, cause your boy isn’t paranoid for nothing. And you never know.)

They all agree to meet and when they get backstage… it’s him.

Bold.

The bros old manager. The man who hurt their eldest unimaginably.

JD basically shuts down as his younger brothers immediately shield him from view.

They need to get out of here without causing a scene. Fast.

“Poppy, I think we need to go…” Floyd mumbles, his usually soft features twisting in both anger and slight fear as he stared the old troll down.

Poppy looks at them in confusion, “Wha- but you guys said you wanted to see everything we set up!!” She looks between the brothers and the older manager, Branch joining her as his eyebrows furrowed.

“Sorry, kids, I don’t think we can do that…” Bruce doesn’t take his eyes off of the old man as he steps back, closer to Clay and Floyd who were holding John Dory’s arms and hands to keep him steady in their safety bubble, their tails wrapped around his waist. “Not when he’s here.”

Poppy blinks in confusion. “What do you mean? Have you met Mr. Bold before?” She asks.

The old bastard chuckles. “Don’t worry, Miss Poppy.” Poppy huffs a bit at being called ‘miss’. (She’s Queen, dammit. Only Hickory calls her ‘miss’ and it’s always as a joke.) “I was the boys’ manager back in the day! It’s just been a while since we’ve seen each other.” He looks over each brother, clearly trying to get a look at John Dory and noticeably souring when he’s blocked. Then he smirks, taking a few steps closer, his wooden cane thunking against the floor. John flinches with each tap, tap, tap. “You’ve all grown up so much.”

Bruce holds his ground, crossing his arms and rolling his shoulders, his bigger body blocking most of JD from view. Clay was growling behind him, both him and Floyd curling closer to John and their ears pressed back in irritation. Bruce gives a humorless chuckle. “Heh. Yeah, we’ve grown up, Bold. We grew up and you’re fucking old now.”

Poppy gasps. “B-Bruce, that’s not nice!” She turns to Bold and smiles nervously. “I’m so sorry-“

The man waves her off. “Don’t fret. I’m sure he didn’t mean anything by it. He’s right after all.” He looks at them again all smugly, leaning on his cane. “Like I said, it’s been a long time.”

Floyd scoffs. “Not long enough.” He growls, baring his teeth. His claws start coming out and he’s thankful he’s holding John’s prosthetic arm as he feels them scratch the metal.

“Woah, okay, what the hell is up with you guys?” Branch finally steps in. That was so unlike Floyd to say something like that. He’s never seen the older troll that angry before, he’s never seen any of his uncles that angry before.

Bruce huffs. “What’s up is that we’re leaving. Now.” He goes to turn around to start steering his brothers out of the room when he hears Bold chuckle, making them all freeze.

“You all really have changed so much,” He says, his tail swaying side-to-side behind him. John looks up and they manage to lock eyes, Bold smiling sickly as John stares in horror. “Especially you, Johnny Baby.”

John feels sick. He feels like he’s gonna pass out. He feels his legs start giving out as Clay and Floyd rush to hold him up. He feels his body going completely limp and his vision blurs and his chest hurts and he can’t breATHE-

Bruce tackles the old troll, immediately landing brutal hits to the bastards face. He screams between punches, “DON’T TALK TO MY BROTHER!” Bold tries to hit him back, only managing to smack Bruce in the side once with his cane before continuing to get pummeled.

Branch and Poppy jump in frantically to pull him off of the man and the three of them stumble back. Bruce shoves them off and glares at Bold again. He was lying on the ground, groaning and clutching his nose, there were scratches and bruises on his face and he was covered in his own glittery copper blood. “Stay. The FUCK. Away. From John.” Bruce pants and shakes out his hands, flexing his exposed claws. He spits on the ground. “Bastard.” He turns back to his brothers. “Cmon, let’s get out of here.” He lifts JD up bridal style and Clay and Floyd follow him as he starts rushing to the door.

“Wait, hold on!” Branch runs after them, leaving Poppy standing in confused horror at what just happened.

~•~

That’s what I’ll give for now lol

I have like wayyy more written out but I’m mean so 😈

Anyway

Thank you for coming to my ted talk

Lmk what y’all think ig

Check out the folks that created these AU’s plz @matmiraculous and Keebsification (idk their tumblr so plz don’t yell at me) both on AO3 where I found them

Later yall

[girl4music]

Waverly going on a temporary trip to Egypt to reconstruct a corrupted Black Badge Division.

Waverly and Jeremy. The BIG brained duo.

Honestly, I’m happy for her. I acknowledge that Nicole couldn’t come with her due to the whole Angel’s Shield stipulation but then I think that would kind of be counterintuitive and counterproductive if she could. This is WayHaught’s necessary break from each other to find their own paths in life and follow their own ambitions - and to be actually EQUAL in their marriage which I kind of understood was the point of the contention between them in the special. Nicole was holding Waverly back. Not selfishly as such. She just didn’t realize Waverly wanted more - or more specifically - wanted to be more than just a wife.

Nicole wasn’t around for Waverly declaring “Shut your patronizing mouth garbage. I can be a hero AND a wife” but their wedding vows were pretty pointed when it came to that. They need equal partnership and for Waverly, that means having an adventure where she can use her full potential and learn new things and just be her own guide and warrior in life.

It’s not that it’s not something Nicole doesn’t want either. It’s just that she already has it with being the Sheriff of Purgatory and she’s fully satisfied with that. What she does want - however - is something much more personal and that is to have a kid with Waverly. Which - I mean - ugh… every time I think about this subject I just have a screaming “what about Rachel?!” response come from the back of my mind because where is Rachel and why isn’t she mentioned? That WayHaught conversation was the time for her to be but they cut all that short following Mina showing up.

I mean I like it when WayHaught get interrupted but not like that. Not when they were about to have an important conversation that we really needed to hear - at least as far as… WHERE THE FUCK IS RACHEL?!

But yes, I am satisfied with this next step in Waverly’s journey and I believe it makes complete sense for her.

Can they actually manage long distance? Maybe their libidos can’t. But time will tell whether their love for each other is strong enough to withstand separation. And for them to be equal partners in life and love. In marriage and heroship. This is what it’s going to take. Can the WEARP fandom be okay with that? I don’t see why not ‘cause surely they’d want them both to grow.

As for me - I’m used to seeing main female characters that are in a relationship go off on their own for awhile to do their own thing for their individual development. I expect it. More than that. I encourage it. WLW/queer relationships are great and I love seeing WayHaught together. But I also love seeing them individually too and how their dynamic changes and evolves based on the contrasting effects of being together vs individual. It’s one of the things I love about Xena and Gabrielle. How they’re so much a part of each other that they can be separated and still be whole characters alone and I don’t like any form of art/entertainment that perpetuates the ridiculous notion that they can’t be because it’s insulting and condescending as all fuck.

I wasn’t worried about the conflict for WayHaught in the special in the slightest once I realized where it was going because I knew they would resolve it just fine.

I just wish they hadn’t cut THAT conversation short because even if Waverly didn’t answer Nicole about whether she wanted to start a family with her or not, I still wanted them to talk about RACHEL because ??? It was just a gross oversight of a significant character from Season 4 of the TV show and the only thing I can honestly say really bothered me about the special because even if Emily doesn’t consider Rachel to be WayHaught’s adopted daughter, I still need to know about where she even is, why she isn’t mentioned and how WayHaught aren’t fucking concerned about her!

Everything else in the special that I disagree with I can take with a pinch of salt and be just like “meh, it’s whatevs. You can’t please everyone” but NOT THAT! If Emily just wanted to erase Rachel from the storyline, that’s a choice that has to be acknowledged in the characterization because - what the fuck, Emily?! 😑

[riddles-n-games]

Anyone remember the knife and the glass ballerina in The Inheritance Games? Yeah? Well, let's talk about that because I have a canon theory about them. I think the reason why Avery was so affected by what Nash told her when he mentioned the knife and the glass ballerina in the first book, especially the ballerina, was because of what it indicated about her vulnerability and not just for the sake of what it meant as a clue in a puzzle. She’s used to being the knife; sharp, on edge, defensive, battle ready, quick-witted, and alert. The glass ballerina, on the other hand, represents fragility, delicateness, vulnerability, being on the knife’s edge of always potentially losing it all, feeling small in someone else’s eyes, not being in control of one’s own life and all because one wrong step can mean the whole thing can come crashing down, shattering to many broken shards of glass that reveal the jagged pieces which are still very much a part of her. It’s just something she’s not used to being seen as but it’s as fitting to her character as the knife analogy. Because the last few years of her life have been so rough, of course, it’s not a surprise that she’s built up her walls and is often on the offensive to defend herself and Libby. 

But, all the same, the emotional well has also been building up and maybe some of that finally started to leak through the cracks by the time she meets the Hawthornes. The brothers have all been taught how to pick up on certain cues and the more hidden parts of a person’s interior which I’d say is a staple of Nash and Grayson but all of them are fairly excellent at it. However, I would also argue that Nash is most exceptional at recognizing such things because he is the eldest of the four and knows his brothers well enough to sense when they’re hiding something as I said in another post. 

This might bother Avery because she thinks her exterior is a strong façade but over the course of the books, she learns to embrace it as shown in the final showdown in The Final Gambit but beforehand, in the first book, this bugs her because literal strangers are picking at her like she’s an open book. And to them, maybe she is, partially, but Avery still holds her own. She doesn’t want to associate with the glass ballerina because she thinks it implies that she is going to break at any moment and she views herself as someone with a good poker face. I think it’s a clever way for us as readers to be able to view these two warring parts of our protagonist and see how she ends up reconciling them as two distinct but equally important halves that shape her to be a better developed character by the end of her arc.

[markantonys]

I feel like the show is gonna do Randgwene breakup justice just based off of how Maddy and Josha talked about their relationship in the interview. And faith that their relationship won't be weird like it was at this point in the books. Like they said there's no secrets between them anymore cause of what they've both been through. Which that is a change but it makes sense?

oh interesting, i thought they meant there are no secrets *shared* between them anymore, i.e. they haven't been telling each other things and don't really know what's going on in the other's life these days...........okay, i went back to get the exact wording!

josha: it is like home, and i do think there’s real love between rand and egwene, but it is a love that’s from the past. and they are together, but they’re still scratching the surface because they don’t share any secrets together. maddy: they feel like home, and they’ve both been in such insane situations in season 2 and so when we find them in season 3, i think they’re really trying to grapple with everything that they’ve had to endure, but i think being honest with each other means that they have to be honest with themselves first, and that can be terrifying, to actually face those demons, so it’s definitely a complex relationship.

so! slightly odd phrasing of that Secrets sentence, maybe a bit of a Josha ESL Moment (in the sense that "they don't share secrets together" isn't incorrect, but just feels a bit off/unclear to my native speaker's ears), but i think he does mean "they don't tell each other their secrets" rather than "they don't have any secrets between them", especially with the added context of maddy's followup comment. (i'm also not sure if he means "they are together" as in they're physically together in the same place when s3 picks up or as in they're still in a relationship with each other when s3 picks up.......then again, i'm guessing rand and egwene are just as uncertain as i am if they're still in a relationship with each other when s3 picks up!)

anyway! regardless of these details, i agree with you that it sounds like the show is very focused on ensuring randgwene's relationship feels Emotionally Realistic and i think the breakup will be handled very well and more seriously than in the books, as is appropriate for the pre-breakup relationship having been more serious than it was in the books (though the comedy of book!egwene and rand going "the other person is being sooooo brave about me sibling-zoning them, i hope they aren't TOO heartbroken" as egwene sends elayne in to take over rand from her will always be iconic in my heart).

and with maddy's comment, it's possible we might see that rand and egwene DO succeed at being honest with themselves and then moving on to be honest with each other by the end of the season. who knows! i think it does feel thematically important yin-yang-foils-wise for rand & egwene to drift apart to some extent particularly in the later, Darkest Hour era of the story, before they then come back together and trust each other and work together as equals for the last battle, but i think the show will be able to put a deeper emotional spin and more pathos on what often feels like petty Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus-type bickering in the books.

based on various interview comments, it seems like the show is going to maintain the book vibe from this era of there being some fraughtness among the friends, especially between rand and the others, but that the show is ALSO keeping focused on how much deep, genuine love there is and always will be between the group. so that i think we'll get a vibe of "growing pains within a tight-knit friend group that don't change the core love there and will eventually be overcome" rather than the book vibes of "the EF5 gradually drifts apart until they feel more like awkward high school acquaintances who don't really know each other anymore when they do cross paths again 7 books later". and the latter vibe always broke my heart, so i'm so grateful that the show cares so much about keeping the love there always between my emotional support found family!

[krasytoonz]

Speech Examples!

King Wally

“What’s a Peasant like YOU doing here! Goodness, you STINK!”

“No, I don’t like this. I don’t like this one either. You are supposed to READ my MIND! Can’t you already figure out what I like and don’t like?”

“I was a bit rude. I know that. But I will not apologize for it. Because I am King.”

“AHHH!! ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?! GUARDS! SOMEONE! SAVE ME!!! THIS FOUL LOOKING THING IS TRYING TO KILL ME!!”

Jester Barnaby

“What do you call Tea that doesn’t have (T)ea?… Just Ea.”

“Hey, don’t go about and hang your head down like that! You did great, buddy. What matters is the effort you put in!”

“I know a place where we can go and relax. Maybe daydream or take a nap! Doesn’t that sound nice?”

“I actually got some tricks up my sleeves!… Well, I don’t got any sleeves. But you get it!”

Castle’s Greatest Knight

“Do you think that maybe he might like me back?”

“Being a Knight doesn’t mean you have to just ‘be’. You’ve got to act and look like one too!”

“Stand STRAIGHT! What are you even worthy of if you can’t even do one simple thing!!”

“I may be merciful, but do not take me for a Fool. So do not treat me like one.”

The Advisor

“That is so funny, because the last time I remember you was… Never. I don’t think you are even good enough to be in the storage of my memories.”

“You see, because ‘pie’ is a consumable good, but ‘pi’ is a maths symbolism that equals to 3.14, it is the reason why you are DUMB. Those are NOT THE SAME THINGS.”

“This is NOT how ECONOMY WORKS, Your Majesty. The people are starving and YOU KNOW THAT!”

“For the love of God I will literally burn you ALIVE if you say one more thing out of that stupid mouth of yours!”

Castle’s Maid

“GAWK!! THE voices.. The noises.. Oh, they’re SPEAKING to me again!”

“No, no no, it isn’t the Castle this time, I know it! Please, believe me! There are things wrong with this Kingdom — HORRIBLY WRONG!”

“It’s a CURSE!! I knew that because I went to this Fortune-Teller and she told me that THIS WILL HAPPEN! GAWK!!”

“Breathe in.. Breathe out.. No, this wouldn’t work! This is silly! Let’s get out of here and run away elsewhere while we still can!”

The Anarchist

“Boasting will do you no good. I don’t like ‘mysteries’ or ‘surprises’ either. Show it to me and I’ll believe you.”

“Somebody who only talks big, but not ‘walk the talk’, is not to be respected. I hope you understand what that means.”

“WHAT IN THE- Julie! SALLY! STOP POKING THAT THING! IT’S GOING TO CRUMBLE DOWN!! GODDAMMIT YOU TWO!”

“Don’t you know it’s dangerous to walk alone in the Alleyway?! Are you out of your mind?!! Stick beside me, I know a shortcut.”

Julie Joyful (in Disguise Name: King-Queen-Royal Julien the III)

“Wow, that was.. SUPER DUPER AWESOMESAUCESNESS!! CAN WE DO IT AGAIN?!”

“AAHHHH!! I AM SO SO SO EXCITED! Let’s go and look for more Mushrooms. Did you KNOW that Sally can cook really good Mushroom soup?”

“Uhhh… Uhhhhheeeerrrrmmmm… I forgot. I’m sorry, but, I’ll try my best to remember. I promise! PINKIE PROMISE!”

“If you want a hug, just know that I am always here. Don’t you waste your tears, my Friend!”

Bounty Hunter Sally

“So we got Buggy and Pinkie on the team. You in or you out?”

“HA! No one can EVER come between ME and Pinkie! You can try all you want but you CAN’T ever separate the two of us!”

“Determination is my greatest Skill! Test me if you like but I WON’T back down from a good ramble! Bring it on! Wahhahaa!!”

“These monsters aren’t actually monsters, but they are just sensitive to Fire and Light and all that stuff. Best you put it away.”

Royal Courtier Sunny

“Yes, very very informative…! Uh, so, when is the festival again?”

“Oooh! That looks DASHING on you! Totally cute and fashionable! Wear it!”

“Morals are very important! You see, without them, people will become violent!”

“Do not fear! I will sacrifice myself if needed! You can rely on me!”

Castle (speaks in onomatopoeia)

“CREEK! THUMP! CRRRRAAAACKKK!” (Fuck u and ur dad and ur mom and ur siblings)

“Thump. Thump. THUMP.” (Thump thump thump.)

“Creek!” (Flowers! I love flowers!)

[dandelion-wings]

On thing about Mondstadt’s government that bothers me is that everybody boils it down to just the Knights on one side, and the Church on the other. Which, sure, they’re what we know the most about…

But it completely ignores the ‘Community Representative’. Considering their signature is one of three needed to (legally) make use of the Holy Lyre, alongside the Grandmaster and the Seneschal, they must be pretty damn important. So assuming they have equal power to those positions, which are at the head of the Knights and the Church respectively, what actually is that power? Presumably it’s an elected position (the title is that of a ‘representative’, plus I would be severely disappointed if there wasn’t even a hint of democracy in the Nation of Freedom), but is there a structure under it similar to the Knights and Church? Is there a completely separate civilian, secular government that for some reason just barely comes up? If it is elected, how is that handled? If both Grandmaster Varka and the Seneschal are on expedition, does that mean they hold more authority than Acting Grandmaster Jean and whoever is Acting Seneschal (assuming an acting-title’s authority, though still above everything else below the proper-title, is still considered secondary to that of said proper-title)? But if so, why hasn’t it come up? Or is it just some guy elected to act as a more expedient alternative to something like a full referendum?

God, I have an education in history and political science that is just begging for some damn answers!

I mean, I don't have an education in those things and am not real good at working those things out myself, so I don't know that I can provide you too much useful commentary here. XD;; But while I'd love if Mondstadt did have some democracy, I... am pretty convinced that it's a theocracy, actually. The Knights and the Church (which tbh seems to exist under the overall umbrella of the Ordo, given that Jean says in her voiceline about Barbara that "the order also manages the Church") fulfill pretty much all the governmental functions we actually see happening at all, including the whole thing in Jean's quest where Charles expects tax forms from her.

I'll admit I also lean that way because I read into Mondstadt as a whole (its history but also our introduction to it, where Amber initially nabs us for unauthorized entry and then there's a whole early section about gliding regulations) a theme of humans repeatedly being given freedom, and gradually rebuilding restrictions upon themselves. Which I don't think is entirely a bad thing, in that I do think communities generally function better with organization and administration and such, but, like, Mondstadt has gone all the way into tyranny before and could again. Mondstadt building itself an increasingly restrictive theocracy feeds into the theme I like drawing from it, so of course that's the reading I tend towards! But, still, that's where I'm at about it.

(I draw a lot of my read of this national theme from the line, "Mondstadt is the City of Freedom, but unchecked freedom without any kind of rules only invites chaos and anxiety," in Jean's character details, and I haven't seen anyone else talk about it, ever, so it's entirely possible this is actually character brainrot I'm projecting onto the city as a whole. I'm fine with that.)

Presumably there is a further government apparatus, but I tend to believe it's probably under the higher authority of the Ordo. Maybe with checks and balances, maybe not (exactly how I arrange the setup for fic where it's needed is specific to individual fic, because the openness of canon leaves the kind of room that makes it easiest to go with what works for the plot). "Community Representative" on its own is very vague; looking at the line where it actually appears, it's talking about the Holy Lyre in the context of the Ludi Harpastrum, so it could even be a role specific to the yearly organization of that particular festival! That said, it does sound a bit more like it's a regular thing, and given my presumption of theocracy above, I think this:

Or is it just some guy elected to act as a more expedient alternative to something like a full referendum?

honestly is the most likely possibility. It would make sense given Mondstadt's ethos and history--you have a representative of the community to sign off on certain decisions (hopefully elected, as you said, but who knows exactly how it happens), like that one about the Lyre, to show that the people agree. Possibly it's a triangle with the Grand Master at the top and the Seneschal (given the above "manages the Church" line) and Community Representative as equals who have input but not ultimate power on the next level down, possibly they both exist largely to rubberstamp the Grand Master and Seneshal's decisions, possibly it's an area-of-authority divide. Regardless of the exact divisions, Jean does seem to have some fairly unilateral powers in the areas of domestic defense and peacekeeping, but that's... something you do want the head of your military-and-police order to have, generally, so who knows how broad her powers actually are to act without the Seneschal and Representative's approval in other areas. The game is, as always, frustratingly uninformative.

Anyway, tl;dr: my personal reading of Mondstadt tends to render the Community Representative as relatively unimportant, despite the equal billing in that quest, because over and over again in quests and lore and voicelines we don't see anything but "the Ordo handles things," and Mondstadt honestly makes most sense to me as a theocratic city-state. I think they're more likely a representative "voice" in the government than a significant power, and I don't think they represent any significant "third branch" other than possibly, given Mondstadt's history, a symbolic reminder that its people have toppled tyrants before and can do so again.