#maybe they relate to the cheating (not a dig)

[sysig]

Finally doodled HL Mod Stanley <3 (Patreon)

[weldnas]

Im sorry and i get it if you dont want to get more anons about it but ivy by taylor swift?? furthest thing from straight. dancing with our hands tied? Yes that too. illicit affairs?? betty? please! she has so many queercoded songs for those who are open to it :)

no babe I’m fiiine talking about it! And yes same for me. As I said before I really don’t no much about her and don’t really want to (no beef, just not invested enough and also CANNOT listen to her talk she just sound annoying to me and not even about what she says, her vibe just does not click for me hdhdhdh). But I do listen to her and some of her songs just feel queer to me.

[murdrdocs]

being luca's little step sister and meeting with him after a long time. i'm sat. (the bear)

stepcest; from luca's pov; MDNI 18+ w/ LUCA (the bear)

luca has never considered himself a liar, because he’s never really lied. he’s always been too honest, too truthful.

according to luca's dad, his blatant honesty was to blame for the first divorce. even though everyone could agree that luca's parents' divorce happened because his father cheated, and not because his mother found out.

honesty has always come easy to luca. it’s the natural route. he’s been honest about why he’s back in chicago, but he still feels guilty. not only because the real reason he’s here is immoral, but because he’s been lying by omission.

“it’s time for my little stepsister and i to reconnect,” is what he tells people when they ask why he’s back. and it’s true, he came here to reconnect with you, but when he tells people that, he doesn’t think this is the image they’re picturing.

you spreading yourself open for luca, laying flat on your back in the center of your bed, your legs bent at the knee and separated as far as they could go. you're waiting for him, anticipating his next move which is supposed to be luca steering his cock towards your entrance. but he's just ... stuck. sitting on his haunches, his body bared completely to you, cock hard and drooped over to the side with the weight of it. there's a matching flush on the tips of his ears and the tip of his cock. there was a bead of pre sitting along his slit, but you'd swiped your thumb over it, smeared it onto your tongue, and then slid the condom over his cock like it was the most casual thing in the world.

and it would be casual, if the two of you were anything other than step siblings. usually, this would just be a hookup between two people.

but it's so different with you, and not just because of the barely-there relation between the two of you.

it's different because luca doesn't want this to be a one time thing. maybe that's the worst part of it all.

he's been waiting for this for so long, since he was nineteen and feeling the weight of what to do next falling onto his shoulders. he was busy trying to figure so much out—what life would look like now that he and his father lived in america, what his life as a chef could look like, how was he going to navigate the feelings that he had for his new stepsister.

but there wasn't much to worry about. things aligned for luca. he's able to realize that when the heels of your feet dig into his lower back as he fucks into you. he's so close to you, his chest just inches away from the peaks of your nipples, his breath fanning against your cheek as he rests his forehead on yours, the tips of your noses tickling the others with every other thrust.

but it feels right. it's not suffocating at all. well, it's a nice form of suffocation to have your cunt gripping down onto him like this. you're literally squeezing him, luca can't remember the last time he's felt so secure inside of someone.

it might be a little sick, but this is where he was meant to be. at least for the time being.

[lovemyromance]

So I finished the books of acotar and Im confused, WHAT IS THERE BETWEEN AZRIEL AND GWYN?? I read the bonus chapter of acosf, but that just showed me more of ELAIN AND AZRIEL. Im literally seeing people saying "azriel and gwyn had more chemistry than elain and azriel" LIKE HUH??? like where did this ship come from? I didnt even know about this bonus chapter until I came to tiktok. I thought gwyn was just a side character... I had no idea this was a ship because there is nothing between them that I saw. 😭

Yeah I literally have no idea. I cheated a little when I was reading ACOWAR and looked up fanart before I finished the series. I saw Azriel with this redhead and was so so confused. I thought hm maybe he gets a mate after the war.

Then I read ACOFAS. Was really shipping Elriel but was sad that his fan art was with some redhead other girl. I genuinely at one point wondered if it was Vassa because she was the only other redhead female character I could think of other than Amarantha 😅

It was bothering me so I asked my friend (who was the reason I read the series in the first place). She said she had no idea who that woman was.

And I thought she was just lying to me to avoid telling me spoilers lol so I continued reading. Imagine my surprise when I finished ACOSF, got even more invested in Elriel, and still had no answer.

Then I actually did a deep dive online and found out that it's GWYN they're shipping with Azriel? I was so confused. I asked my friend if there was another book, why is this Gwyn Azriel ship a thing?

She didn't remember who Gwyn was because she read ACOSF immediately when it first came out and hasn't reread since, but that's beside the point.

Then I did some more digging. Apparently a bonus chapter existed which made things more clear? I read it. Still did not understand where the ship came from. If anything, it only cemented Elriel endgame for me.

I said okay, maybe I'm being biased? I made my friend read the BC - she did not even know it existed and she literally has been reading the series since it came out in like 2015 or whatever

But again, that's beside the point.

And before anyone even argues, she was a strong Elucien supporter and would argue with me "no they are mates Elriel is not a thing". I made her read the bonus chapter and she immediately switched to Elriel. She said "yeah ok - there's no going back from that one". She also, did not view the Gwynriel interaction as romantic in any way.

I really don't know where Gwynriel came from. Like I've said over and over again - I understand Elucien. They are canonically mates. A mating bond is all they have, but until disproven, it still counts.

Gwynriel doesn't have that. They barely even interact on the page.

I don't know if it's because people hate elain, or they ship Azriel with themselves and they can't relate to Elain so "hey, here's another attractive straight girl boss I can pretend is me", or they ship Elucien and need Azriel out of the way 🤷🏻‍♀️

Gwynriels literally KNOW there is nothing romantic between the two currently. Their entire ship is based on this concept of "well it could happen" or "what if". That's why I don't take it seriously. They have very limited info about both Gwyn and Azriel and they have allowed their imaginations to fill in the blanks. Then the ship gained popularity and their imaginative scenarios got repeated enough that people began to think that was actually in the books. Then they got confident and began to yell their made up scenarios louder in the fandom.

Most of Gwynriel is rooted in imaginative headcanons. They saw any mention of Gwyn or Azriel and began to fill in the blanks themselves. Aka Azriel trying to excuse himself by saying "I have to go over daggers with Gwyn" suddenly wasn't just an excuse and actually a secret planned date between the two where she got "private dagger lessons" and they talked for hours or whatever. It became real to them even if it didn't exist in the books. They didn't do any fact checking before repeating their HCs over and over until it became the truth to them. And then they went on other shipping posts and started fights over their fake recollection of canon.

Literally just last week, I saw a post about how Gwyn only blushes for Azriel she has feelings for him. That never happened. She blushed for Rhysand, not Azriel.

But the thing is, just because you say something louder than someone else, doesn't mean you are correct.

I really don't engage with Gwynriels because half of them have admitted they haven't even read the books, just the bonus chapter. Or they've just read ACOSF.

Either way, I just see it as a crackship. If they ship it because they find it cute, sure whatever. If they're more active in the fandom, I just scroll past their posts and don't engage. I don't see where they are coming from and they're not going to see Elriel so there's no point trying to convince anyone at this point.

[writermask-0807]

“winter’s eve,” or: “and the cold of your embrace.” gojo satoru x reader

Warnings: wrote this in a weird mood and a banging headache, so that's probably why it sounds so shitty lmao (😭) there’s also some stuff that doesn’t add up so there's that. angst with no happy ending (dont come for me yall), implied cheating, swearing (like one f bomb lol), also the title literally has nothing related to the fic in itself (except maybe one paragraph 😭). uhh that's all, I think, but lmk if I missed anything!!!

he comes home late, your satoru. late enough that it’s early, actually, with the pale rim of the sun trying to push weakly through the bruise-colored clouds purpling the night sky - late enough that you think he’s not coming, like most other nights. 

but when he comes stumbling in, staggering off to the side as he giggles, drunk, with pink in his cheeks either from the cold or the booze, you think it might’ve been better if he didn’t come home at all. and it sounds cruel, doesn’t it? knowing why satoru, your satoru, who can’t really be called yours anymore, (from a god to a worshipper, did you really think that he would love you like he actually, truly meant it?) is like this. why things are like this, really, but it’s getting harder to bear, these days. 

and as tears fills your eyes when your mouth parts open to speak, you wonder when it’s changed to bearing, and not loving satoru. “where were you?” you ask him, and it’s a broken, whispered thing, no longer being shouted with explosive anger, wrapped in vicious hurt and dripping venom. 

it comes out resigned. tired. you’re tired, and maybe he sees it, for once; (and you want to scoff at the irony of it all — because even with his all-seeing six eyes, satoru has always been blind to you. or maybe he chooses to slide a rose-tinted film over them, and honestly, at this point, you don’t know which one is worse-) maybe he sees the harsh shadows in your eyes and the halo of dark circles, the bitten lips and the messy hair. maybe he sees that he’s the root of all this, because he stops. 

there’s a pause - a sobering quiet, and you think he knows what’s coming. there’s something in the air, something cold and stinging, something tight enough that when you finally breathe his name, it feels like a thread snapping, something falling apart at the seams — like blood oozing through the stitches of a wound, scabbed over and over and never quite healing. a beat too late, you realize that that something is really you and satoru. you and me, he said. we. us.

there is no us, satoru. there was never an “us” and that fucking hurts.

and now it’s all gone, snowed over by satoru and his frost-cold eyes and his freezing voice and his icicle-sharp words, cutting so deep that you’re afraid you can’t dig them out, especially with your winter-numbed fingers. in hindsight, you really should have seen this coming. 

and he must see it too, now, because satoru is a man called god - mighty and powerful and all-seeing - and he truly plays the part. and so he smiles, wide and nonchalant like he doesn’t know this is ripping you apart. like he doesn’t know that this is the end. like he doesn’t even care, and you hate him for it. 

“oh, you know. out.” 

he says lazily, throwing his shades off as he stumbles his way towards you, arms wide open, grinning all the while. you flinch as he steps into the moonlight, reaching out for you, those cruel, cruel eyes holding the stormy brilliance of the skies, glimmering in the weak light — and you think that cuts through the fuzz, the haziness in his mind - sobers him up.

satoru stops, only a breath away from you, close enough that you can smell the alcohol on his breath and the scent of another catching in his clothes and his hair and his skin, see that the smile has slipped off of his face, see the shimmer of his cold eyes, the gaping emptiness in them - a void, that, no matter how much you give of yourself to him, that can never be filled. 

“you’re leaving.” he breathes quietly, soft. broken.

you remain silent, tears clouding your eyes, spilling over your cheeks like a dam burst. because you’d expected yelling, screaming and even cursing, or the cold indifference that satoru has always used to freeze you out, and this - this vulnerability hurts so much more. you wish he would just - just - 

a trembling hand comes to cup your cheek, cradles your jaw, lifts your eyes to meet his, full of melted ice, desperate and searching for something, anything to hold onto, but it’s been ten long, painful years of breaking and fixing, hurting and healing until you’re so scarred over that there’s nothing else left to wound, and by god - you’re so, so tired.

you bring a shaky hand to cup his, curled around your face, tears trembling on your lashes, unable to bear that look of heartbreak in those damned crystalline eyes of his. did he see this, too? 

“i love you. i love you so, so much, don’t you know that?” he murmurs, voice catching, forehead knocking against yours, and you stifle a sob behind gritted teeth. because you know. of course you do; it’s why you’re here now. it’s why you’ve always been here for so long. 

“i know, satoru. i know, but this love of yours is only killing me.” you tell him in a broken whisper, and you feel his grip tighten, feel him shake against you. 

“don’t say that. don’t say that. please…” satoru never begs. he never has had the need to, but now - now he wonders if anything would have changed if he had. he would have fallen at your feet, begged you with all that he had and meant it with his entire chest, baring the tender heart inside for the entire world to see. but it’s too late.

he’s always too late.

“please…” he murmurs against your mouth, lips brushing against yours in one last desperate attempt - and it’s helpless and bitter and wet from the salt of your tears — yours or his, maybe. you don’t know anymore. 

he kisses you and you kiss him back just as hard and wanting, fingers curling into the moon-bright mess of his hair as you tug him down, nails digging into his back and his mouth crushed against yours and it’s desperate and rough and messy, and it feels like the last time and the first time in a long time but this is it. 

this is the end. 

and when he finally pulls back, panting and breathless, you think he knows it too. 

“i’m sorry, satoru.” 

you tell him, and even without the tears in your eyes, and the waver in your voice and the ache in your chest, he knows you’d mean it all the same. you’ve never been as selfish as him, even now, even when it’s your right to be. you could never be as cruel as him. and maybe that’s why this is goodbye. 

and so gojo satoru is selfless for once. he doesn’t chase after the warmth of your mouth when you press your lips to his one last time, a parting gift - a lingering curse. he doesn’t have it in him to look up even when he feels you glance at him one last time, your eyes tired and mournful and full of tears. 

and worst of all, he doesn’t hear the faint “i love you,” that lingers long after you leave, silent to his ears, the door to his house left open, but his home long gone.

FIN-

[mamayan]

Hello ml✨ CONGRATS

I'm dumb asf because I didn't understand the Russian Roulette thingy for a good minute but I wanna request Shota w these numbers-(I hope to God I'm doing this right)

20, 37, 59, 68, 97

Uhhh fem reader- pop off✨

Bang! … No bullet was shot—

Shota Aizawa

“You’re pathetic, you know that right?” || Sleep || Nightmares when sick || Step!Parent

tw: NSFW • Implied Cheating • Fem! Reader (18+) • Fingering (F) • Taboo Considered Relations • Use of the term Daddy

wc: 790

He’s alone again.

The right side of the bed is empty, not even a warm hint of his wife having returned home from work. She’s working late again, though Shota felt a roiling in his gut telling him it wasn’t work she was staying out so late for.

She’d been distant, though that wasn’t too shocking considering their relationship was hanging by a thread.

He couldn’t leave though. Not if it meant he’d lose something even more precious.

You, who he already noticed was creeping into the room, light sleep set hiding hardly any of your body from his dark gaze as he tiredly sighs aloud. Like a sweet dream you appear by the side of the bed, crawling onto the mattress like a predator on the prowl. Sweet features illuminated by the moon, you smiled down at him.

“I can’t sleep Daddy…” you were too old to be calling him that, and the way it made his cock harden beneath the comforter only confirmed how inappropriate this all was. He didn’t stop you though, not when you revealed more smooth soft skin for him as you tossed your top somewhere into the darkness, breasts free of any bra to hinder them from his view.

“Fuck,” it’s impossible not to lose it as you straddle him over the covers, bottoms still in place as you plant your hands against his chest.

Shota isn’t a man who allows a brat like you to get away with whatever, no matter how cutely you act.

The retired-pro hero has you beneath him in an instant, shirtless torso draping over you as his dark hair falls to curtain over your faces.

“You can’t sleep so you make sure I can’t either?” He’s not angry despite his words, easily slotting between your thighs as he nips your bottom lip. He doesn’t miss how you shiver and arch for him, he grunts as your cunt shifts to grind up against his hardened length still tucked away in his boxers.

The little smirk on your lips is irritating, but your next words light a spark.

“You’re pathetic, you know that right?” The way your chest presses against his own as you breathe the insult against his mouth makes him groan, able to taste the sugar on your lips from whatever late night snack or drink you’d been consuming. “Getting hard for your step-daughter is just—ngh,” you’re stopped short when he grabs your throat, his smile dark and promising as he copies your earlier actions and speaks right up against your mouth, not quite kissing you. “Is just what, hm?” He grinds harder against you, smearing the slick in your panties as you moan, hands quick to tangle in his thick loose hair. “Remember you’re in my bed brat,” he chuckles at your responding whine.

“I can’t sleep,” you say it again as if it was his problem to solve.

Maybe it was, since he doesn’t hesitate to slip a calloused scared hand right into your cute sleep shorts and easily locate your puffy clit to rub. He watches your eyes roll back, the quick access to pleasure and pressure you were eager for granted without much of a fight tonight.

He was eager for touch too, hands grasping and groping in the minimal light, lips quick to connect with yours in a sensual embrace, tongue slipping in without resistance as you whimper beneath him.

“Daddy I need more—,” he groans, thumb moving off your clit to dig two inside your tight heat, stretching you open and doing quite the opposite of helping you sleep.

“Be quiet, you’ll disturb the neighbors,” he chides lightly, lips trailing to your neck where he’s tempted to mark you up. He doesn’t, only licks and nibbles too soft for any capillaries to burst are littered on your sensitive skin.

“I want your cock,” it’s needy and desperate as you writhe, hips unable to still as he works his fingers inside of you, curling in your gooey walls and making you see white as your orgasm builds.

“You want to act like a brat, be good and cum on my fingers first.” His gruff tone leaves no room for argument, though you might’ve managed had he not had you so close to your end.

His lips silence the cry you release as your core tightens, body wracked with tremors as you come apart for him.

A noisy squelch echoes as he drags his messy fingers from your bottoms, holding them in front of your face with a dark brow raised above sleepy eyes.

“Thank you Daddy…” it sends chills down his spine at your sweet whisper, eager and happy to clean your own cum off his fingers while watches with a hungry gaze.

Post dividers/@cafekitsune

[undeaddove9]

NSFW related// contains genderbend AU with wlw charmoree and ♂ Manon (their names stay the same), cunnilingus, squirting, cheating (Rody and Manon have not broken up yet)

I'm writing this just because I needed to write some culinary yuri... and because I love listening to this song it reminds me so much of them :3

"Me and your girlfriend playin' dress up in my house, I gave your girlfriend cunnilingus on my couch"

Her crush couldn't stop yapping about how sweet and caring her boyfriend is.

Ughhh, why was this stupid redheaded puppy talking about some guy that she's clearly not interested in listening to? ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ

Was there ever a way to shut her up?

Suddenly, a very great idea pops into Vincent's head.

YURIKA!!! ☝️💡

And with that, she's decided to make Rody forget all about her precious boyfriend, Manon. How exactly, you may ask? Well...

"Ngh! Hah—AH! VINCE!!" , Rody lets out a loud moan as her boss was hungrily lapping up at her sensitive folds and clit.

The woman was shakily sitting, now almost slouching, on Vincent's couch in her apartment, with thighs spread wide open, making access for the chef to devour the swollen cunt in between her legs. Her fists were clenching for dear life on the couch cushions near her.

She never expected this, in all honesty. She had an assumption that her boss was just being nice and sweet when welcoming her into her house. She never expected to end up in a heated situation with the younger woman.

Her face looked so fucked out right now. She's sweating like crazy, with her eyes rolling back into her head and her tongue lolling out. Maybe she should just let Vince do her thing. No, she wasn't supposed to enjoy this!

But...

"Hah- holy shit... Vince, please. You can't... I— AH! I'm in love with Manon- nghHH!... I'm not supposed to do this with you haaahh..." , she continued with her stammering words, hoping that her boss would at least consider putting a stop to whatever she was currently doing to her.

Unfortunately for Rody, her words were completely futile. Instead, she received a harsh nibble and tug on her twitching clit, making her scream in sudden pleasure.

Oh god, she was seeing stars at this point.

Vince looked up sadistically at the heavily panting woman and led out a chuckle in response. "Oh, mon cœur ♡ You don't have to lie to yourself. Your voice may be rejecting me but your enticing body is telling me otherwise. You don't seem like you ever want me to stop, so..... ♡"

That was all she said before continuing to thrust her skillful tongue back into Rody's soaking wet pussy. Only this time, she's doing it roughly, occasionally sucking on her pretty clitoral nub and creating even more stimulation towards her trembling employee.

The auburn haired woman had no choice but to submit to the ongoing pleasure that her body was receiving.

It was driving her crazy. She can feel the pooling heat in her stomach. Her nails were digging deeper into the couch cushions, almost tearing the fabric. The ravenette gave her clit one last suck and... Oh fuck. She's about to...

"VINCE! I'M GONNA CU—haAAAAAAAA!!!", the waitress' words were cut off as she finally came and squirted her juices into Vince's awaiting mouth. The chef lapped up every single drop of her beloved waitress' fluid she could get.

Rody then plastered a satisfied grin on her face with her eyes still rolled back into her head from the aftermath and her thoughts were very much clouded from the intense orgasm she had.

She couldn't even think straight anymore.

Vince, on the other hand, can't help but smile at the older woman in front of her, carefully getting herself up from her previous position.

"So... How was it? Did I treat you better than that Manon of yours, mon cœur?"

"Huh?? Eh? Wh... Who...??"

"That's what I thought ♡"

[samhatch]

Things I would put in my ACOTAR fixit fic:

Stone Heart

ABOUT: When I first read ACOTAR, I thought this was unique to Tamlin. I don't recall it being said in the first book that it was related to Amarantha's curse, so I thought this was just something about Tamlin's past that we would learn later.

WHAT I WOULD CHANGE: I'd really like to take this in a Howl's Moving Castle or Odin direction, that Tamlin had to sacrifice his heart in order to gain a powerful ability. I would make that his shapeshifting ability. Making this ability something he gained on his own, rather than something he inherited, would be so much more interesting! It would also mean that his true "high lord beast form" is something we still haven't seen, and is an ultimate form even Tamlin is afraid of using. This would also mean that when Feyre gains abilities from all the high lords, she does not gain the ability to shapeshift, which could solve some plot issues down the road. Also, also: this would mean that his heart is stone forever, and cannot be healed by breaking the curse. He made a faerie deal, and those can be unforgiving.

2. Feyre's Mother

ABOUT This line from the book has always stood out to me: “Didn’t … ,” Tamlin interrupted, his deep voice surprisingly gentle, “didn’t your mother tell you anything about us?” I prodded the table with my forefinger, digging my short nails into the wood. “My mother didn’t have the time to tell me stories.” I could reveal that part of my past, at least. Lucien, for once, didn’t laugh. After a rather stilted pause, Tamlin asked, “How did she die?” When I lifted my brows, he added a bit more softly, “I didn’t see signs of an older woman in your house.” (Page 79-80.) WHAT I WOULD CHANGE I want to make Feyre's mother fae. Specifically a Selkie, that Papa Archeron would have kidnapped on one of his sea voyages when he was young. He hid her cape that allowed her to transform back into a seal, and she was forced to marry him and have his children. Because she was in human form when she had her daughters, they would all be 100% human, and not fae, despite having a fae mother. This also explains why Feyre's mother was so bitter and disconnected from her family. She only ever wanted to go back to the ocean. But eventually she died of heartbreak and homesickness. This is also why Feyre is so hung up on her promise to her mother, even though she wasn't treated very well: it was a fae contract and unbreakable, without Feyre ever realizing it. I think it's also possible that one of her mother's relatives (or maybe Tamlin, since she would have been one of his subjects) would have cursed Papa Archeron for not returning her to the ocean, and that's why all of his fortunes changed so drastically and suddenly. It wasn't until Tamlin lifted that curse that her father was able to make money again. (I also like the idea that her father is genuinely a savvy businessman who was cursed to make bad deals, and all the riches he earns after the curse is lifted were earned by him and not just cash that Tamlin magically threw at him.)

3. Illiteracy

ABOUT Feyre being illiterate is important to her character as a human, so I wouldn't change that, but I would change how she gains literacy in the second book. WHAT I WOULD CHANGE This might be cheating, but I would just have her gain literacy after the high lords give a piece of themselves to resurrect her. Give her pieces of their knowledge about each court as well, and it helps bridge the uncomfortable age gaps, fast tracks her literacy, and gives her important strategic knowledge of the whole of Prythian. This way, her becoming a leader feels more legitimate, and that it's a position she could actually command with genuine competence. Is it cheating? maybe. Would it change her character completely? probably. But no more so than her character already changed form book 1 to book 2 I think.

4, The Trials

ABOUT I know this was some folks' favorite part of the book, but for me it was the opposite lol! The first half felt whimsical and magical, and the second half felt rushed, anticlimactic, and disjointed. To this day, I don't understand why Amarantha made a deal with Feyre, when she'd already won! There was no benefit to this deal for Amarantha, she could have captured and tortured Feyre to her heart's content. It's lazy writing, honestly. WHAT I WOULD CHANGE Amarantha needs something from Feyre that she can't get on her own. I don't know what that is yet, but I'll figure it out (maybe it's her mother's selkie coat for some reason, or maybe there's magic protecting Feyre that prevents Amarantha from killing her outright, so she puts her in a no-win-scenario aka: the trials.) I would also change the trials. I hate the worm. It felt so lazy to me, like a Dune worm? Really? If there is actual faerie-lore to back this up, I'll accept it, but it just felt like SJM was throwing in the kitchen sink of sci-fi cliche's. I would nix the worm completely, and redo the trials. The only trial I liked was the one where she had to read, because it felt like there was actual build up to that in the books, and the cost of losing being her friend's life rather than her own felt like the stakes were really high. Too bad she only won by cheating. :/ I would craft the trials in a way that force Feyre to think outside the box, and really understand the fae's love for wordplay and cleverness. Here's how I would construct the trials: 1. A Hunting Trial - where Feyre has to hunt a mythical beast. She thinks it's going to be a terrifying monster, but isn't prepared for it to be a pucca that looks like her mother. Trauma ensues! :D 2. The Riddles Trial - I wouldn't change anything about this! It forces Feyre to come to terms with her stubbornness and unwillingness to accept Tamlin's help when he first offered to teach her to read. 3. Embracing Tamlin - keeping the inspiration from the Ballad of Tam Lin, Feyre needs to hold onto Tamlin while Rhys reaches into his mind and forces Tamlin to take all kinds of terrifying shapes that hurt Feyre. Feyre never lets go, and passes the trial despite all the harm it causes her. Feyre passes the trials, but at the cost of her life, and Tamlin has to hold her dead body, knowing that his shapeshifting killed her. :'(

I'll reblog this and add to it as I get more ideas! Let me know what you think! I'll write out an actual fic at some point, but I feel like I need to finish reading the first three books to do it justice.

[moosemonstrous]

Ghost Rider Pacific Rim AU - and the wheel keeps turning

Guero has a reputation in the barracks. He knows people, and people know him, partially because he’s been running around the base since early Cat-3s and partially because he made it his business. He made sure the mid-level folks on the support side know to come to him when they need something from the dome without the fuss of the paperwork. He made sure the quartermaster always gives him and his first pick at the list if he doesn’t want his city activities exposed to the higher-ups. He made sure to drop in by the techs’ break room every other day for literal years and feed them whatever it is they aren’t getting through the official channels, in return for a little of the same. The Shatterdome machine rolls smoothly with a little grease, and Guero holds the oil canister.

It means he’s a busy man, and it means that he doesn’t like to waste his time if he can help it. When he reached out to the new guy, it was mostly because someone getting into the academy outside of a recruitment drive usually means they’ve got interesting friends. Reyes certainly turned out to have those, if not in the way Guero suspected.

“Decommissioned, my ass,” he mutters, watching the EPLS deliver an arc reactor to Hell Charger’s bay. Word in the hangar has it that Stark is personally overseeing installation, too. Some very interesting friends indeed.

“What do you even want with the jaegers, anyway,” Pavel groans, bored. “Didn’t you say there’s money in working the ground?”

“I did, and there is. But it’s risky, and I don’t have a good contact in the Bone Slums yet.” He has to be extra careful, talking to Hannibal Chau’s people. He isn’t willing to sell anything actually important. “Think about it, the rangers go anywhere they want. Even the brass doesn’t want to piss them off.”

“Isn’t it good, then, that Reyes made it in?”

Guero loves his friends dearly, but he’s painfully aware they’d be all doomed to the front lines if any of them was behind the wheel. Sometimes it’s like trying to keep a bunch of puppies from jumping into the lagoon. “Reyes is a lying piece of shit.”

“Eh,” Pavel shrugs. He’s more interested in watching the beastie fights on his phone than anything going on in the hangar. “No offence, man, but you give him too much credit. Lena said the blood lab all think the whole solo drift is bullshit. He’s gonna get a stroke the first time he goes out for real.”

Maybe. The D-Sci people know their odds. But so do the techs, and they have been surprisingly tight-lipped on the matter. Rumour has it that Stark has been trying to get his mini-armour program off the ground since he took over R&D – and suddenly a long-lost heir to The Charger turns up to pilot the damn thing solo? Guero likes to think he can read people pretty well, and Reyes didn’t strike him as a complete idiot. Naïve and in over his head, but not necessarily a patsy – even Brooks thought he was cheating on the sims. Someone who, with a bit of guidance, could help Guero get his foot in the damn door.

Besides, he did a little digging. Reyes Senior was easy – his photos are in the news reports from the time, and there was an obituary and everything. It even mentions a wife and children, even if no further detail. It’s his co-pilot that doesn’t show up in any searches. Probably a brother, because most rangers were related or married before Mk-3s, but everything about him has been scrubbed out from any database Guero managed to get his hands on. All he has is the old Filipino down in electrics ranting about a missing friend before his shift leader told Guero to scram, and several extremely vague recollections of an asshole nobody wanted to be around anyway. Which is just another piece of this puzzle that makes no sense – the rangers do everything in pairs, it’s their whole thing. The Romeo Blue brothers are said to be constantly at each other’s throats, but you can’t mention one without the other. All the other dead rangers have their dedicated entries on the memorial wall in the main hall. He checked both names around Alberto Reyes, and then the whole list from that year – every other one could be linked to a tech, or a janitor, or a soldier. Nobody unaccounted for, nobody ‘unassigned’, save for a girl who was only six years old and died a couple of months before Daggerblight anyway.

It's weird. It doesn’t follow what Guero has always understood as the way the Shatterdome operates. Rangers are damn near revered around here – this little information about the first ones to die from the corruption is just– maddening.

Guero Valdez doesn’t suffer being made a fool lightly. He’s going to figure this out if he has to beat the answers out of Reyes himself.

###

(ugh genuinely is he going too hard too quickly? I've had a Day so people making logical decisions as according to their internal compasses is a somewhat alien concept rn)

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

I think royal divorces can only happen after ten years of marriage and attempts at counselling - Peter & Autumn apparently had this, so did Diana & Charles and also David Linley & Serena

It's a good theory, but when you really dig into it, it doesn't hold much weight because it assumes that everyone divorced after only 10 years of marriage, which hasn't happened.

Margaret & Antony: Married 1960, separated 1976 and divorced in 1978 (16 years of marriage and 2 years of separation). They both had affairs but it was Margaret's affair with Roddy Llewellyn being published by News of the World and the scandal it caused in 1976 that forced the separation and ultimately divorce.

Anne & Mark: Married in 1973, separated in 1989, divorced in 1992 (16 years of marriage and 3 years of separation). They didn't intend to divorce (and announced said intentions) despite both being linked to other people (Anne with the man who became her second husband) but in 1991, it was confirmed Mark had fathered a child born in 1985 and there was a lawsuit for child support. Anne filed for divorce in April 1992.

Andrew & Sarah: Married in 1986, separated in 1992, and divorced in 1996 (6 years of marriage and 4 years of separation). They didn't intend to divorce either but Sarah had a series of embarrassing scandals that forced a divorce.

Charles & Diana: Married in 1981, separated in 1992, divorced in 1996 (11 years of marriage and 4 years of separation). By all intent and purpose, everyone was fine to let them remain married by separated but then escalating scandals over Diana's behavior (affairs, tit-for-tat with Charles in the media, culminating in Panorama) forced The Queen to require divorce.

David & Serena: Married in 1993, separated in 2020, and it's unclear when/if the divorce was finalized (26 years of marriage). There's been no reason given for the divorce but a lot of articles about the Snowdons' divorce announcement suggest it might be related to finance/business issues.

Peter & Autumn: Married in 2008, separated in 2019, divorced in 2021 (11 years of marriage and 2 years of separation). No reason given for the separation and divorce. It sounds like irreconciliable differences in the press coverage.

The only thing all of these divorces have in common is that there was a separation before the actual divorce; however, it is not legally required for a couple to separate before they divorce. The only requirement in England is that the couple be married for at least one year before divorcing. So there probably isn't a minimum requirement on a royal marriage - there may have been The Queen's preference, but I'm skeptical that was even a thing because if it was, she wouldn't have allowed Andrew and Sarah to separate after 6 years; she'd have required them to wait 4 more years. (But then one could also argue that Andrew was The Queen's favorite so of course he's different.)

There also isn't really evidence of a requirement for counselling. We know that Charles and Diana were in counselling because there's irrefutable evidence of it. We don't know that any of the other couples received counselling on their marriages. It's certainly plausible there was counselling for all of them because there isn't a whole lot we know about most of the marriages, but it's not something to use as a benchmark.

What we can use as benchmark is that 4 out of these 6 marriages ended because of extramarital affairs and infidelity that embarrassed The Queen and the monarchy. In other words, it's fine for there to be cheating or "being linked to other people" (as it was phrased for Anne and Mark) but it can't be front-page news and it can't be the married-in being "exposed" for breaking vows. That's really the only common thread here.

David's and Peter's divorces are different. Their separations and divorces played out behind closed doors, which prompts a few questions: Did no one care because they're so far down in the line of succession? Maybe. Did they learn to keep their private business quiet? No, because Peter still got busted for breaking COVID lockdown rules. Did they learn to clean up after them? Maybe. Because Peter getting busted for breaking COVID lockdown to see his girlfriend means that if there had been infidelity, the press would've sussed it out. In all likelihood, both of the 2020 divorces are not the result of infidelity or extramarital affairs.

So circling it back to the Sussexes. If we go by precedent, the only way the BRF may try to force a divorce is if Meghan embarrasses Harry with a very public affair. But even then it's not a really good predictor because of how much everything has changed. Harry and Meghan are private citizens now and we have King Charles in charge instead of Queen Elizabeth. And, well, King Charles doesn't quite have the same moral standard as Queen Elizabeth so he can't really make the same kind of demands without appearing hypocritical (and usually that's where Harry tends to get a lot of grace).

So the only thing we can really say about if or whether the Sussexes divorce is that an actual divorce will be preceded by some type of separation during which everyone will be negotiating terms of the divorce, including custody.

[masterthespianduchovny]

I do not dislike Michelle Keller, formerly Michelle Lasso, but I do dislike how the series and most fans either refuse to criticize her or defend her.

I understand that fans, esp women, are compelled to defend Michelle because she’s a woman and women are overly criticized and dragged unnecessarily at times. I get that. However, there would be think pieces about Michelle is she were Michael. And I truly hate this current trend of pretending everything is different when it’s a woman involved.

It’s quite strange how people are so sad for Ted being made to feel like he’s too much—hmm, I wonder who made him feel that way—and are rooting for him to have a happy ending with someone who accepts him as he is. Then when you directly criticize Michelle, it’s a ton of excuses about how separation/divorce is hard, Ted wouldn’t be transparent with her, and so forth.

While this is true, intentionally or not, Michelle still hurt Ted in a major way. And, I don’t know about you all, but I believe you should still apologize for hurting someone even if it wasn’t intentional.

Michelle became short tempered with him and had an issue whenever he tried to do things for her. While her reaction wasn’t malicious, there’s nothing wrong with, “hey, I know you meant well. I just—it’s hard being around you and having this life with you when I don’t even feel like I know you. I shouldn’t have lashed out. You didn’t deserve that.”

Boom!

This NEVER happens.

Michelle never has to take any accountability for the things she’s down, which we know has a major effect on Ted. Essentially, people are arguing he deserved that treatment all while saying, “poor Ted.”

Michelle making Ted feel bad for saying “I love you.” I understand Michelle was going through her own shit, but Christ! Would we defending her if the genders were switched? I’ll need to rewatch the episode to really dig into that, but it felt unnecessarily cruel even if she didn’t intend for it to be so.

Someone will correct me on this, but Michelle and ted separate in February and by March of that same year she’s pushing for ted to sign divorce papers. It’s not like he’s a busy man or anything??? Literally most divorces, esp considering how long they’d been married, take a while to happen. Ted fucking granted her the divorce without her even asking and was kind about the entire thing and Michelle is pushing for a divorce within the month.

Is that not strange?

I honestly think this was just a bad writing choice, but my God, I can’t imagine the discourse if Ted was a woman—Thea. And how “Michael” would be dragged for that and people speculating that either they were cheating or wanted to be with new and different women. Not even accounting for how some would relate to “Thea” and how their ex did them dirty.

But again, we can’t talk about that. No matter how fucked up that was, NOPE!

And this recent shit. I don’t even know.

I don’t know if it’s a case of poor writing or not because I don’t think the series is going to go there. Meaning I don’t think the series is going to say Dr. Jacobs groomed Michelle. But let’s keep in mind that he was her therapist originally, and then their marriage counselor. He was the one who fueled Ted’s dislike of therapists and always sided with Michelle. I don’t think Ted even felt like he could be heard.

When Dr. Jacobs realizes it’s Ted, he freezes as if being caught. As if he was cheating with Michelle. Even Michelle is acting suspicious as fuck. There’s no, “I didn’t want him to find out about this, he may take it hard.” It felt like they’d both done something they were supposed to be doing. Both come off as guilty as hell.

Do I think the actually had an affair?

No.

Or maybe it was an emotional affair.

But people love to skip over the shit Michelle does (or inadvertently blame Ted) and it’s fucking annoying. Not necessarily because they don’t pay attention to her, but because the discussion around her behavior when they actually engage with it is either brushing off what she does or defending it.

[alatismeni-theitsa]

my fav byzantine fact is when they would destroy everything that had to do with pagan religion and even killed people who weren't christian <3

Did you forget that Polytheists oppressed, persecuted and killed Christians first, for THREE HUNDRED years.

Hiding in the catacombs, getting murdered, honoring the Christian martyrs... you think Christians did these things as a hobby? 😂In the Roman Empire policy towards Christians was that they would be punished if they refused to worship the emperor and the gods. Christians were actively forced to worship gods they didn't want to worship. By the Polytheists.

Sorry to offend your little uwu cute ancient polytheists but 1) they did bride kidnappings 2) they threw "deformed" kids off cliffs 3) religious stories and depictions of rape were A Thing, endorsing a Rape Culture in many ways (I had a whole post with scientific papers about that) 4) pederasty (with young boys!) existed 5) gay men were literally called "those who drag shame with them" 6) cheating was socially acceptable for Greek men while the less the woman came out of her house, the better 7) slaves were far lesser than them compared to when Christianity came 8) oh and... THEY KILLED PEOPLE WHO WEREN'T POLYTHEISTS. Aka the Christians.

Don't get me wrong, persecution of any type is abominable. I want people to let other people worship in peace. I just listed all the above because you seem to ignore there was great hostility between Polytheists and Christians (which ultimately led to many deaths) for a reason. And the Polytheists started it. The first religious persecution ever in the Helladic area was that of Christians. By the Polytheists.

My point is....Before you completely cancel another group for doing something, maybe consider if "your" group has done it too, and maybe... did it first? Christianity has a long list of bad things but Hellenic Polytheism has a grim past, too, filled with the same crimes if not some more. There was a reason people were becoming Christians in droves*. Underprivileged groups finally saw the prospect of a better life compared to the Polytheistic faiths they were in. The first European to get baptized was a Greek young woman.

*It's estimated that there were fewer than 10,000 Christians in the year 100. Christianity grew to about 200,000 by the year 200, and then to almost 2 million by 250.

I said that I hate that people were killed for their faith (!!!), and this goes for Polytheists too (!!!). I also detest any destroying of buildings and manuscripts (which indeed happened). But, in this case, what would you like me to do??? Start beef with the long-dead Leonid dynasty or something? 😂 Which dynasty do you want me to spank? Tell me and I'll dig them uuup

Okay, hear me out... I will throw away the whole of the Byzantine Empire for the Polytheists it killed if you throw the whole Roman world away for the Christians it killed. Let's cancel EVERY culture for killing Polytheists, Hebrews, Christians, Zoroastrians and Muslims. (note: Persecution of Christianity is still going on in some countries, and it never stopped) Yes?

Also, no, Christians did not destroy everything related to Polytheism. Did you seriously come to my asks with the knowledge of a bitter scorned 16 y/o who read one single sentence from their history book?

The reason ancient Hellenic Epics and other classic works have survived is mainly that Christian Hellenes passed them down and copied them in their libraries and monasteries. The Greeks/and Eastern Romans they were actively reading and discussing the ancient works, and based their own research and philosophy on them. Arabs in the middle ages translated tons of still-existing (!) ancient manuscripts from Greek to their language. The reason Europe remembered these works, too, was the Hellenes who brought the still-existing (!) ancient manuscripts with them in the freaking 15th century to Europe after escaping Constantinople.

[fumblingmusings]

Your writing is so faultless to me i love your portrayals of evryone but if its alright me asking do you have any outside inspirations for your writing from historic books or documentaries? You seem so involved in historic events often I feel I'm right there with you when you describe things but at the same time I'm not from the west and i have no idea where to begin to get a grasp on things. do you have any resouces in particular?

That is absolutely not true regarding my writing I have clunky syntax and I was re-reading a chapter and saw that I accidentally made Gilbert change genders randomly so... typos. You never catch them all... Congratulations Gilbert on transitioning. But thank you. You're so very kind to say so.

I am sorry if I misunderstand, so you're asking about what inspires my writing that isn't taken from history? Because the honest answer is not much. I do genuinely get inspiration from moments in history. I love period dramas. A lot. I don't read as much fiction as I should, and when I do it's historical fiction. I don't really watch much tv... I read Wikipedia pages in my spare time about huge overarching things like International Relations between 1648-1814 and then go down rabbit holes because I then go 'Oh I wonder what Arthur and Francis would have thought of each other at this time'. I like the occasional fantasy and anime. I'm a big DC comic book reader and write fics for one unpopular pairing on my main blog - that's where I got all my writing practice from; I started fanficcing in 2019 really.

In terms of formative 'I am watching one thing but thinking of Hetalia whilst doing so' pieces of media at the moment. Currently it's good old Game of Thrones and House of the Dragon, books and tv both. I am also thoroughly enjoying Trigun Stampede at the moment (a series about one twin with a mother complex who doesn't know he has a brother complex and the other twin who has a brother complex but doesn't know he has a mother complex).

I do cheat. I work for a University Archive so I have full access to the course readings and the library resources for the taught courses. A lot of Universities actually have their reading lists online. So I just pretend I am a student and have a wee nosey and see what topics and themes I want to read more about, which ones catch my eyes. I may also borrow the books from the University Library itself. I may in fact be that asshole who has your essential reading for that seminar out because oooh isn't Adam Ferguson's opinions on man as a social creature fascinating. I have a particular love for International Relations, so I automatically go towards those topics rather than things like social history. Neither is bad, it's just something I've learned I enjoy after so many years of studying. The former just tends to make for an easier narrative driven read, that's all.

Having said that. A lot of unis also just list books that they think are interesting and that people maybe would like to read. Rather wholesome. Many also make available their specific readings for their courses. For example, I like to go to UCL's website and see what History topics they cover on their website.

Then get very excited, for example, when I see say Transformation of Britain, 1547-1707, so I follow the links and see what they recommend. The University of Reading also has a very good list, as does the University of Edinburgh. These things make me go nuts - they lay it all out for you, and you don't have to pay a penny for the lists. Teach yourself ha!!! Some of the sources are available online, some you may have to dig around and see if a library has them. Some you sigh mournfully and only imagine what kind of information is contained within.

This is probably so unhelpful orz. Forgive my babbles.

EDIT: Oh! Music! I'm such a dumbo. I do use music quite a lot for inspiration. I don't have playlists but I do have songs and scores that I associate with certain characters for sure. They help a lot with moods and ~vibes~

[kaythefloppa]

WK S7 Prediction: Race to Goat Mountain

Episode 3 of Wild Kratts's upcoming 7th season is titled Race to Goat Mountain, featuring mountain goats.

Chris and Martin, off to explore mountain bio-zones of Goat Mountain, bump into Paisley Paver. Paisley reveals her hideous plans for a development dubbed "Asphalt Ascent". The brothers are horrified. Thinking fast, Chris challenges her to a race to the top of Goat Mountain. Whoever gets to the peak first decides the future of the mountain ecosystem. Is there any creature in these steep slopes and dizzying heights who can help Chris to victory? Enter the mountain goat!

HOLY FUCKING SHIT OUR PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED!!! MORE PAISLEY PAVER SOLO EPISODES. LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

I'm like, 90% sure that Chris wrote these episodes. Between this and the premiere episode, we're having a lot of Chris-centric stories. Is this maybe to compensate for how many episodes Martin wrote/had his 2D-animated counterpart under the spotlight in the last 2 seasons? Either way, I am fucking DIGGING IT {I do hope they don't oversaturate this though like they did with Zach last season}

The premise seems like that'll be very similar to the Cheetah Racer episode, but to be frank, that episode was about Zach capturing an animal to help him in the race. This episode inversely is about Paisley racing so she can threaten animals. It's good to know they're not 100% rehashing stuff from older episodes [which was one of my main problems with Season 5, and to a lesser degree, S6].

That being said, the bros have kicked Paisley's butt many times before, so I don't know why Chris would suddenly challenge Paisley to a race instead of, idk, trying to stall her, or looking for the goat so he can use the Creature Power Suits to keep Paisley at bay: Paisley's been hanging around Zach and the other villains for quite some time now so of course, she'd end up cheating. Then again, I guess Chris might use the suit to try and bpass Paisley's cheat codes:

Wait, now that I think of it, Chris is the climbing brother, so maybe he challenges her knowing he's a good climber and thinking he'll get to the top, but realizing he bit off more than he can hcew so he uses the goat power suit.

Fun Fact; Mountain goats... are not actually goats! They're not in the same genus as other goats despite the physical similarities they're more closely related to gazelle! This is a very little known fact but I'm hoping that this fact is brought to life because of how many people that'll be as dumbfounded as I am. Not to mention there's a lot of potential for a Chrizelle callback, which I would totally fucking DIG. [And it would make sense for Aviva to modify the Gazelle Power Disc for Mountain Goat Power].

[mlynar-nearl]

yo random question but like. can u make sense of whats written in the elite operators files (like blazes) bcs ive been staring at her archive file 4 for days and im just straight baffled

not sure how much what i have to say can help but i'll do my best!

blaze's archive file four and rosmontis' archive file 3 appear to be from the same file kept for all elite operators in rhodes island. my guess from the fact that it's so short is that it's information extracted from the elite operator's in-depth file as sort of a "cheat sheet" for the doctor to look at upon first being authorized to deploy them. the elite operators can only be moved by amiya and kal'tsit personally, and the doctor likely received short profiles in order to inform their decisions when authorized to do so as well. (this is notated by the very end of this section.)

thinking of it as a cheat sheet for the doctor makes the most sense because it makes the phrasing of the rest of it fall into place a lot easier.

point one: infection status- unsurprising considering this is terra and rhodes island.

point two: personality. this is important in a team environment, obviously. probably to give the doctor an educated guess at what they might be inclined to do, say, or think.

point 3: background. blaze's interests me because it mentions her having ties to yan and a diplomatic incident, and both her and rosmontis have a lockdown on deeper digging into their backstory- probably for their own comfort and safety. anything else would be purely speculation, so let's just say that point 3 tells us that blaze has ties to yan and victoria somehow, was involved in a diplomatic incident in her past, and became infected. not necessarily related or in that order.

point 4: status as infected. this appears to be how they view their relationship to other infected, and how they process the politics of the infected. blaze is listed as "follow, identify, serve" which seems to indicate that she wants to help people at rhodes island. to me, this ties in to her "the rights of the infected will only be won through the hands of the infected" victory quote. she's the hands. other people are the brains.

point 5: tactical overview. this is closest to an obvious part of the 'cheat sheet' reading. basically, what are they good at? blaze is good with small teams and assault tactics. it's a little surprising they called her self-disciplined here, but maybe she is in a combat sense. good at keeping herself going and knowing her limits.

point 6: ?? potential. the most mysterious metric here. i'm going to make an educated guess and say that it has to do with the potential of creating a massive disaster or incident, and that it possibly relates to control over arts. blaze is listed as low, and rosmontis is listed as medium. this is probably because of rosmontis' combination of extremely destructive arts and trauma making her a slightly higher risk. it's unlikely that any elite operator goes above medium, because they need to be the best of the best and not a risk.

point 7: type-b assignments. unclear what rhodes classifies as type-b, but probably to do with the type of assignments the doctor deals with, and things in the main story. this relates to my theory about point six by saying that blaze is recommended and rosmontis is permitted "with supervision."

point 8: authorization. just authorization to order them around. only for doctor, amiya, and kal'tsit. doctor is listed last because they're added to that list last, and newest.

[breitweisergallery]

the sequel to the idol gaon au

5 Idols Who Were in Drug-Related Scandals

4. Bae Woo-Sung from Minotaur

Bae Woo-sung, the main vocalist of boy group Minotaur, was charged with possession, consumption, and intent to sell narcotics in March 2019, as first released to the public by a press release by FH Entertainment. According to the release, Seoul Central District Court had learned of Bae working with four other people over a 14-month span to distribute narcotics. His sentence refers to an estimated total of 729 offences in that 14-month span. 

At the time of the trial, Judge Kang Yohan sentenced him to serve fourteen years in prison, However, in a press release on October 5th, Judge Kang Yohan announced an error had been found in the paperwork relating to Bae Woo-sung’s case, and with such a clerical error, the ruling will be overturned and Bae Woo-sung will be released from prison. He will have served a total of seven years of his sentence upon release. 

Whether or not Bae will return to his group is unclear as FH Entertainment has yet to release a statement. His little brother, Bae Woo-jin of Alt-R posted a message to his SNS welcoming his brother home.

There are few things that make Kim Gaon nervous. If asked, he would say that the thought of disappointing his fans, his friends, and himself, is the only thing to make him nervous enough to need to wipe sweaty palms subtly on the thighs of his dark jeans. 

There are very few things that make him properly nervous; sitting in the silence of the private room rented for eight hours in the back of their favourite restaurant brings back the butterflies in his stomach that he thought he had managed to subdue that morning. 

Yohan had spent close to twenty minutes talking down the nerves that left Gaon unable to sleep the night before, a worried look on his face and his fingers threading gently through the dark roots and fading purple hair, touching Gaon’s cheeks lightly with his fingertips. 

Never mind the embarrassment Gaon felt at keeping Yohan awake all night with his worrying. 

They’ve been together eighteen months and it still surprises Gaon when Yohan breaks from his usual to be more human, more vulnerable. Whether it means staying awake to comfort Gaon through a panic attack or sudden tears, reading aloud to him in the quiet of the study, or pretending to put up a fight only to cave when Gaon asks him to bring home a second cat to keep Kkomi company. It surprises Gaon every time, to see the way Yohan looks boyishly young at times, shy at others, seeking comfort and affection the same way Gaon himself does. 

Yohan’s ability to calm the worst of emotions does little to help Gaon as he glances down at his phone and fidgets with the places where his case has cracked but not quite broken yet. To his side, even without looking, he knows Woojin is starting to get anxious, fidgeting as well. 

The door slides open and Gaon nearly launches to his feet, head shooting up. Both he and Woojin let out identical sighs when the face that greets them is not Woosung, but rather the other person to whom the invitation had been sent out. “He’s late?” 

“You’d think prison would’ve fixed his punctuality,” Gaon snorts. 

“How’d that work for you?” Hwang Junseok, leader of Alt-R’s former brother group MAX, sinks down into a seat opposite Gaon. His feet nudge against Gaon’s and Junseok gives him a wry grin. 

“Can’t say it fixed any punctuality problems, but I get laid now.” Gaon shrugs and pretends he doesn’t catch Junseok’s jaw slackening. 

“So it’s true? You and Judge Kang?” Junseok asks. Woojin sighs, a little louder, and scrubs his hand over his face. “Shut up, Woojin-ah, no one gossips with me anymore.” 

“Should’ve admitted you stole that shit ‘stead of me. Maybe you’d have a boyfriend then,” Gaon adds on, a grin threatening to break the barrier of nerves digging its heels into his stomach. 

“Though I’d hate to have to be the one to tell Eunbi you cheated on her with Kang Yohan of all people,” Junseok says. 

“I think she’d get it. She was raving, last time she was backstage with us.” Woojin hits him, and even as Gaon rubs his chest, pouting, a softness warms his heart at the slight roll of Woojin’s eyes but the smile tugging at the corners of his lips regardless. 

It had taken time, but they’d gotten there. Many late nights spent in a practice room, talking to each other had finally solved the rift between them, with Woojin’s guilt eating away at him and Gaon’s own uncertainty as to where they stood. 

“Leave Eunbi out of this, you bastards,” Woojin says, shaking his head. “Ah, someone text him and tell him if he’s not here in ten minutes, I’m leaving.” 

“Seven years and you still haven’t learned any patience, little brother?” The door slides open and the three of them at the table stumble to their feet. 

Bae Woosung looks barely any different from the last day Gaon saw him. Hair cut short and styled spiky, tattooed freckles visible on his bare face, and a simple pair of stud earrings in his lobes. Junseok, the closest to the door, gets to him first and pulls him into a tight hug. Woojin follows after; Gaon lingers behind, giving them a moment. 

“Would’ve thought you’d’ve learned to be on time,” Woojin mutters. Woosung laughs and, barely taller than his brother, lifts up onto his tiptoes to tuck his chin onto Woojin’s head, punching his arm at the same time. 

“Absolutely not. Can’t teach an old dog new tricks and all that shit.” 

Gaon melts into the hug when Woosung gets to him, holding onto him just as tightly. It takes Gaon a moment to even remember the time he spent in jail. It’s barely a drop in water compared to the near-decade Woosung had spent, and yet Woosung looks good. Like time has barely passed. “Let’s eat, shall we?” Woosung says and, finally, they sink down into their seats and it’s like time hasn’t passed. 

“Are they letting you back into the group?” Woojin asks after close to thirty minutes have passed. Woosung takes a minute to finish chewing before he answers. 

“Unsure, still. Ray Junie’s fighting with the company about it. Gaon had it lucky, just getting his offer from a different company. Which, speaking of, are the rest of you still at Play?” 

“We all switched over to Saram about two months after hyung did,” Woojin says, shaking his head. 

“I’m still at Play,” Junseok says, tapping the table with a sigh. “We’d be a harder sell. We’re a bigger group.” 

“With one of the three ‘vocal prodigies’ of third generation,” Woosung tosses back at him with a shrug. “Yah, Woojin-ah. Pour me another drink.”

“They want us to compete in that show that’s coming up. Legacy, or whatever.” Gaon and Woojin make quiet noises of understanding. Woosung stares blankly at Junseok. 

“Hey, Hwang Junseok. I just got out of prison. Cut me some slack. Fill me in.” 

“Six surviving third generation groups compete for the title of ‘legacy group.’ They just ran it with six girl groups last year,” Gaon says. He himself had missed it, working at the courthouse. “They’re running it with boy groups this year. They contacted Play about MAX competing?” 

“They said they want us, because then they can get you,” Junseok says shortly. Gaon blinks, unable to come up with a response to that. 

It’s true, he realises after a moment. If MAX were going to compete, then Alt-R would likely follow right after them. The rivalry between the groups had been playful but strong, debuting only a year apart and in the same company. And Gaon and Junseok were known to be close. 

“If we were offered, and I re-joined the group, we’d kick both of your asses,” Woosung says through a mouthful of food. 

“Bullshit. You’re out of the game, Woosung-ah,” Gaon laughs. Junseok grins. Woosung kicks him under the table. Gaon’s tension eases the longer they spend in the room, drinking and eating and laughing. Gaon is tipsy by the time they hit the third hour, exchanging stories and sharing gossip like no time has passed, like they’re just four friends in their trainee dorms again.  

Woosung’s phone is the first to ring, a several-year-old girl group song playing cheerfully from his pocket. “Ah, fuck me, hang on,” he mutters. “Ray June-ah?”

Gaon’s phone rings seconds later, laid flat on the table so Kang Elijah can be seen. “Elij-ah?” Junseok squints, leaning across the table to look. “Who-?”

“Yohan’s niece. Elijah?” Gaon answers the phone, turning away from the table. “Is everything okay?” 

“Yohan isn’t home, and he’s not answering his phone.” Elijah’s voice is shaky, worried, and Gaon sobers immediately. 

“Did he have any meetings on the calendar?” Gaon asks. He can hear the negative in her voice before she even says a full word. “I’ll try to get a hold of him, and I’ll come home, okay? Elijah? Wait in the study for me, and don’t open the door for anyone except for K.” 

“You gotta go?” Junseok asks. Woojin pushes his chair out. 

“I haven’t had a drink. I’ll drive. Let’s go. Hyung, let’s go.” Woojin grabs Woosung’s wrist, directing him towards the door. Woosung slips into the backseat next to Junseok, while Gaon takes the passenger’s seat and directs Woojin to the house. 

It takes them almost forty minutes to get the house, an impressively short amount of time given Woojin had been careful not to speed for most of the drive, incredibly aware of having three not-sober passengers. 

Gaon rushes up the driveway, the other three following behind him. He rushes through typing the code into the door and hurries into the study, pulling Elijah into a hug immediately. “It’s okay. I’m here. I’m here, Elijah,” Gaon murmurs. Her body shakes against his in silent sobs, as she clings to him and cries. 

“Gaon-ah,” Woosung says. Gaon looks up. 

Woosung and Woojin are both hesitating at the doorway to the study, while Junseok cranes his head, wandering the room and looking around. 

“Make yourselves comfortable,” Gaon says quietly. “Or, if you want to go home, I won’t stop you. Woojin-ah, if you want to drive,” he gestures with one hand, still holding Elijah with the other; — “just be safe on the roads.” 

“We’ll stay with you,” Woojin says softly. Elijah sniffles. 

“Woojinie’s here with me, Elijah, if you want to meet him officially,” Gaon murmurs. Without raising her head from his shoulder, Elijah hits him in the side. “Ow- ah. Fair.” 

“I like you already, Elijah,” Woojin says, sitting down in one of the armchairs. Woosung follows his lead and, like Junseok, cranes his head to look around the room. “So this is where Kang Yohan lives, hm?” 

“Shut up,” Gaon retorts with no real heat behind his words. “Or, at least, be helpful and text the others. Elijah, have you heard from K?” She shakes her head no.