#maybe it's just a sensory thing
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Okay this is maybe a bit silly but I've always been a little insecure about my height and yes it's a fictional character don't @ me but I like knowing Emmrich is tall...
Proceeds to make my two Emmrich romance Rooks - one super short and one super tall
Anyway, I love my bean pole wife
#one day I hope to fully embrace all 5'8 inches of me thats not#charlotte that sounds terrible#change it#no#i need rest#emmrich#emmrich volkarin#dragon age veilguard#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#datv#i'm feeling insecure because it's that time of the month#maybe it's just a sensory thing#but ive always felt i take up too much space#i think it's good to talk abt insecurities#it's normal#and no doubt the thing you're insecure about someone else will admire abt u#oh the human condition#i got like 1 hour sleep#might delete this later hmmmmm
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Summer Vacation Summoning Shenanigans 2
idk when the batcave gets a Laz pit but the answer here is ânot yetâ bc reasons
***
By the time Dannyâs duplicate returns to him, Robin has finished - very thoroughly - tying up his captive ninja. And was now staring him down.
Red had moved to texting someone after ensuring Danny was belted in and putting the plane on some kind of autopilot - which, very cool.
He hadnât been bored, though, looking over the plane interior with glee.Â
While the exterior design wasâŚa bit much, the inside was sleek and high-tech. It was no rocketship, but going over which controls were similar and which differed and trying to guess what they all did was plenty entertaining.
He was less than half-way through them when he re-merged with his duplicate.Â
Luckily, Red and Robin were still occupied by that point, giving him time to focus on sifting through the memories.
He tries to stifle his laughter, disguising an escaped snort by pretending to cough into his fist.
Red apparently chooses that moment to be done with his phone (and damn, he sent some poor sob a book).
âSorry about that; I had to update Batman.â
Danny let himself laugh at that.
âBat-man? Not, like, Birdman or something?â
âNope, the bat himself. Speaking of which; I was hoping youâd be willing to answer some questions?â
Robin chose that moment to plop into the seat next to Danny, who looked at him in askance.
âHis vitals have stabilized; the tranquilizer has fully kicked in. There is no more need to worry about a surprise escape; by the time he awakes we will be back in Gotham.â
Danny hummed.
âSo like, are you just dropping him off first? Or was the âtaking me homeâ thing a play on words that actually just meant âkidnapping me take 2: electric boogaloo?â I mean, you donât even know where I live; my place could be closer to here than to Gotham.â
âYour accent resembles nothing of Nanda Parbat,â Robin says.
Red picks up after him.Â
âNo, no, weâre taking you back to your home,â he clarifies, shaking his head and x-ing his arms. âYouâre from somewhere in the mid-western United States, right? Gotham is the first US city weâd hit flying this path.â
âIllinois,â he answers, squinting in thought as he searches his memory for a âGothamâ or a âNanda Parbat,â which, ha, âPar-bat.â âI take it weâre somewhere in, like, Europe or something?â
The Robins share a look.
âWhere is the last place you remember being before you were kidnapped?â Red asks.
âIllinois,â Danny shrugs, settling back in his seat. âAnyway, you can just drop me near Chicago or something and Iâll take it from there.â
Red huffs a laugh. âNo need for that. I gave Batman your name and description; heâll have coordinates to where you need to go in no time.â
âWell, thatâsâŚâ âInconvenient,â he thinks to himself, hoping for the first time that this is actually a different universe so he doesnât have to come up with an explanation to cover for how he somehow ended up abroad without including the whole âbeing summonedâ thing.
The last thing he needs is to give them a reason to put him through the Ghost Catcher.
â...nice,â he settles on. Unconvincingly.
âDo you know why you were taken?â Robin presses.
Danny opens his mouth to answer, but pauses.
âYep!â he concludes, eyes crinkling with his smile. âIâll even answer that question if you answer one of mine first.â
The smaller Robin narrows his eyes suspiciously, Red asking âWhat question?â
He turns away from Normal Robin to look at Red Robin.
âWhatâs up with the âflying thingsâ theme?â
Red slow blinks, Danny can practically hear the dial-up noise.
He was probably expecting worse in exchange for âhey what does the murder club want?â
The smaller Robin answers while he is collecting himself.
âThe Robin title is inherited, passed down from the first. It is a reference to the costume colors. Batman chose his name and costume as a symbol of fear, to intimidate the criminals of Gotham.â
âOooooh, so itâs like a gang thing!â
Red Robin makes a choking noise.
âWhat!? NO! I- that- weâre heroes! Batman is a founding member of the Justice League!â He manages, face painted in disbelief.Â
Robin, for his part, remains silent - though a brief glance out of the corner of his eyes reveals a pinched expression.
âOh, right,â he nods along, deciding he is definitely not still in the same universe. Sweet, no worries about hiding the ghost powers then, especially since heroes were apparently enough of a thing to have some kind of support group or something.
âSo does that mean you have bird-powers?â
âNo,â Robin says. âAnd you havenât answered my question yet.â
âAh, right, Raâsâ thing. He said he was trying to summon the âLord of the Dead,ââ Danny does air quotes along with the far-too-pretentious-title. Honestly, âGhost Kingâ was bad enough.
âThe âLord of the Dead?ââ Red echoes. âSummon? As in, with circles and blood-sacrifices and magic.â
âYep,â Danny pops the p. âI wouldnât worry too much though. Heâll probably be distracted trying to un-kidnap this guy and deal with whatever had his other guys running around like chickens with their heads cut off for a while yet.â
---------------------
Tim had left a call open to the batcave so the rest could listen in, and after Dannyâs incredibly alarming answers about Raâsâ current goal it was no doubt exploding with texts and suggestions in the groupchat. Good thing he muted it fully.
He feels a bit bad interrogating the guy, but time and memory donât go well together. People often dismiss as unimportant things that are actually the key to breaking a case; the more thorough their questions, the more likely they prompted a memory that would give them the answers they needed.
Unfortunately, Danny didnât seem to know much.
âDid Raâs say anything about who this âLord of the Deadâ is? Or why they were trying to summon him?â
âNope!â Danny smiled. âNothing about - who aside from the title, of course - or why, just that they did want to summon him. If you guys donât have bird powers, what powers do you have?â
âWe are not enhanced beyond what the average healthy human could achieve, though we are all highly trained in combat - some more than others - and skilled in detective work. We rely on skill, research, and preparation.â
And on and on; Danny giving uninformative answers then asking a question for each theyâd asked on their âturn,â and them giving carefully vague answers of their own.
One consolation is that he didnât seem bored.Â
For someone who claimed to have woken up less than an hour ago on the wrong side of the planet heâs justâŚrelaxed. Calm. Seemingly unaffected, down to his microexpressions.
No signs of shock.
Of course, heâd treated the Lazarus Pit as a kiddie pool.Â
And despite his words, heâd shown no recognition at the mention of the Justice League, and around half of his questions thus far had been about them.
Clearly something was up with him; whatever it was would probably explain the self-assurance.
Heâd escaped from the League before theyâd even known he was kidnapped, afterall. Tim and Damian really only solved the final hurdle for him. Even with most of LoA distracted with something, it was still impressive that heâd manage to slip whatever restraints and guard theyâd undoubtedly had him under.
Which is, of course, when Damian asks.
âHow did you manage to escape?â
Danny shrugs.
âHave you ever seen that thing that coyotes do where they get their leg stuck in a beartrap or something and they gnaw it off to escape?â he says, expression unmoved.
âYou are a meta, then,â Damian concludes while Tim just stares at Danny in horror.
At that, Dannyâs expression changes.Â
âA what?â he squints, uncomprehending.
âA meta - or metahuman - is someone with a meta-gene, which grants them superpowers. Like how Flash is so fast: thatâs his meta ability,â Tim says. âYou still had all your limbs when youâŚdove into-â
âWait, wait, back up,â Danny interrupts. âTo be clear: I did not gnaw off a limb. That was meant to be a joke. So Flash is a âmeta.â Is that, like, common?â
Tim was beginning to suspect this guy either had memory loss, was an unlucky alien who only landed recently - just in time to get kidnapped by the League of Assholes - or was just really sheltered.
Heâd also suspect some kind of Pit demon, given where and how they found him, but he has so far been nothing but polite and cooperative - if a bitâŚchaotic. In terms of questions heâs asked.
âIâm kind of surprised they bothered to form a group if there are so few people with powers,â Danny mused after Damian filled him in on the statistics. âEspecially if most of them are as minor as you said.â
âEven just one person with strong powers can spell disaster if left unchecked - the League aids response times in that regard. Besides, itâs not like metas are all there is to pay attention to - there are plenty of villains without meta abilities, intergalactic politics to deal with-â
âIntergalactic? Are you guys doing things in space!?â
Danny was suddenly very close, nose just a hair's breadth from touching Timâs own.
He swallows quietly.
âAh, occasionally? G-green Lantern is. A Green Lantern. Theyâre basically space cops, so thatâsâŚmore his thing. Though a previous Robin did have to deal with a Gordanian-Tamaranean conflict affecting a Tamaranean ally - Starfire.â
Danny leans away - just a bit - as he speaks, seemingly basking in the information like a cat in a sunbeam.
âYouâre allies with an alien? Ancients,â he breathes. âThere are aliens. So cool.â
âTch, of course there are. I already informed you of Superman,â Damian huffs, causing Danny to whip towards him.
âSuperman is an alien!?â
Theyâd also mention Batman and Superman being close allies, which apparently inspired Danny to let loose the sea of questions heâd been holding back.
âWhatâs his species called? Is Superman a translation of his actual alien name? You never showed me a picture; does he look human or is he totally different? Whatâs his planet like? Have you been there? Is he comfortable in Earthâs atmosphere or does he have to use environment-adjusting equipment? Or is it well suited to him? Is that why he has powers, actually? Because the difference in planet allows him to thrive? Or are they an inherent trait in his species? Whatâs his culture like? You said Green Lantern was âA Green Lantern;â is he an alien too? Or is that the space copsâ names? Are most space cops aliens? What about the Tamaranean person - Starfire? And the Gordanians? Where are they all from are they all from the Milky Way or are some extra-galactic do they allhaveenvironmentalneedssimilartoorlessthanhumanscantheysurviveinthevacuumofSPACE-â
---------------------
Once they get Danny to pause for breath - which takes an impressively long time - they promise to answer his questions with a gentle reminder that theyâre supposed to take turns asking things.
If Danny was cooperative before, heâs downright eager now. He listens with near-religious awe to every answer they gave.
When itâs their turn to ask a question he becomes unnervingly still and stares with an intensity that has Tim half-concerned theyâll catch on fire for every second they arenât talking - though luckily between himself and Damian the pauses are minimal.
His answers are both more detailed and more focused.Â
If they ask if he saw any information about the summoning ritual, he only mentions catching a glimpse of âthe summoning room.â Asking what the room looked like nets a description of the columnsâ styles and the general vibes, asking what things he saw in the room got them an exhaustive list, but if they wanted further detail they had to ask specifically about the item in question.
He had an awful lot of details for a guy who only âcaught a glimpse.â
He also refused to give them details about what the circle looked like because ��for all I know you could be lying about everything youâve said so far and planning to use me in your own ritual as a sacrifice to summon the Lord of the Dead.â
He and Damian spend a few of their turns opening the internet on the batplaneâs front window and showing him some articles and videos about themselves, Batman, Gotham, and the JL to get them to trust him.
He eventually says heâll describe the circle to them if he can meet an alien.Â
Appealing to his sense of self-preservation by explaining the information would increase their odds of stopping Raâs does not help, nor does appealing to his sense of âhelping others.âÂ
Itâs an introduction or the highway.
Not the worst outcome, given how many aliens they know.
The rest of the flight is spent like this.
---------------------
Danny is having quite possibly the best day of his half-life - and life, if heâs being honest.
Aliens! The universe heâs in has aliens! And he gets to meet one! Probably!
If Raâs requests something that isnât outright evil heâs honestly, genuinely considering granting it (in exchange for something, of course. Having a cool home universe is enough for maybe a deal, not for a freebie. Maybe he can ask for a regularly scheduled summoning to talk to the aliens? And all of the information Raâs has and will ever have on aliens? Ooooh).
Not that heâs going to make it easy on him, of course.
And wow he is loving the information exchange with the Robins - theyâre telling him about aliens and he just has to, what, describe a chandelier? A book? His opinion on the pool?
They ask a surprising number of questions about the pool.Â
He gets twin dead-eyed stares when he asks if theyâre thinking of installing a bird bath - yeah it cost him an alien question but there are only so many pool-related questions he can answer while ignoring the joke hanging right there.Â
He had to.
When they finally land and exit into what looks like the inside of a high-tech barn, he canât help but think they might just be sour that they didnât think of it first.
âNot to be judgy, or anything, but Iâm not really getting cave vibes here,â he comments as he descends the final step from plane to floor, looking up once heâs clear to watch the roof finish folding closed over their heads.
âBecause this isnât the cave,â an unfamiliar voice says, melting out of the shadows in a corner to reveal a purple-cloaked woman.
âWait, let me guess: Purple Robin? Purple Bat? Peafowl?â
Purple snorts good-naturedly and shakes her head.Â
âAll good guesses, space cadet, but wayyy off base. Itâs Spoiler, non-flying thing name haver extraordinaire.â She dips into a dramatic bow, eyes crinkled in what, even without her mouth visible, was obviously a grin.
âEhhhhâŚâ Danny tilts a hand side-to-side. âSpoilers can technically fly if you crash a car hard enough.â
âBy that logic everything can be considered a flying thing,â Robin frowned.
âWell the Earth is hurtling through space at around half a million miles per hour chasing the sun through an endless void with no âgroundâ in sightâŚ.â
âWell!â Red Robin ends the brief silence that had inspired. âWe should probably head to the batcave, but for security reasons we canât let you see how we get there-â
âHey, does this smell funny to you?â Spoiler asks, holding up a bottle of what was almost definitely chloroform.
He can see Red and Robinsâ mask eyes widening (somehow) and makes the split second decision to lean forward and take a deep breath of the bottle being held just high enough for him to stick his nose over it.
âCitrusy,â he says before pretending to fall unconscious.
***
*Timmy Turnerâs Dadâs voice* âIâm respecting reality by acknowledging that chloroform doesnât work like that but asserting my authority as The Author by making it work like that anywayâ
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Sorry if I missed anybody anyway here's part 2!
#dpxdc#chaotic summoned-by-Ra's Danny#Tag interlude#idk much about Spoiler except she's purple and kinda chaotic and maybe set of a gang war by accident once#Also idk if thereâs already something like the sensory interference helmet or not#but if there isnât: yes there is.#(think the thing that prevents superman hearing batmanâs heartbeat [idk if thatâs canon or fanon either tbh] but like#a helmet#Fucks with just the person wearing it - vision [the obvious one]#but also noise is silenced except something like an internal gyroscope thingy that messes with sense of direction#Idk#I'm not a scientist#Just roll with it#long post
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okay one trend I've seen a lot more is that like. people are becoming more open to veiling. I've seen a number of newly converted (though I believe the term is reverted?) Muslim girls happily showing off their new hijabs, and I've seen people move from hijabs to niqabs very happily too. And now I'm seeing Christian girls start to veil because "their Muslim sisters" taught them how. I've seen that thrice now, which. Okay. Three times isn't A LOT, but it's 3 times more than what I had seen all other years in my life! And I don't know if it's becoming more popular among Jews or not, but I personally am seeing more information about it! If it's not more popular, it's at least being shared more. And that's just Abrahamic religions. That's not even talking about regional cultures! Some have gone completely, like Saxons, but there's still people reenacting! Uhhh I haven't noticed an uptick in dupattas but I still want to mention them bc I think they're some of the prettiest things in the world for REAL.
this post goes nowhere and does nothing, really. i just... am glad to see veiling practices. so pretty <3
#every week or so i go if i wasn't 1: scared of how ugly i'd look or 2: scared of pins#maybe.............................#but yea no ive got no religious or cultural ties to veiling either#ALSO i cant STAND having things over my ears. sensory hell.#ALSO ALSO i just got new piercings and i wanna show them off!!#this is going to my drafts im too afraid to post it#EDIT OLLY TOLD ME TO SEND IT BUT I DONT KNOW HOW TO SEND A DRAFT#SO IM JUST GOING TO BE A BIG BOY AND POST IT
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pokĂŠmon dishwasher magnet
#my posts#stim#sensory#stimmy#stimblr#stim gifs#pokemon#pokĂŠmon#video games#wooper#quagsire#water types#magnets#brown#blue#household#kidcore#I guess⌠most pokemon things are kidcore to me#but maybe thatâs just the nostalgia talking#I also have the uncropped version if wanted
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My second favorite thing about the Netflix Daredevil series brand of fan fiction is that he has the saddest wettest eyes. Pathetic touch-starved wounded duck.
#the first is the sensory overload#(heâs just like me fr fr)#and then the third is the maybe the âcatholic guiltâ thing where he thinks heâs a monster but really just a poor little meow meow#Daredevil#netflix daredevil#daredevil tv
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genuine question here, why do ppl headcannon morty as autistic? like idk if its just bcs i cant relate personally to him in that way but like i just dont see it and im genuinely curious, im always open to more autistic characters lmao
#like as far as i know he doesnt really stim he doesnt show any sensory issues or related things#hes a bit awkward i guess sure#i mean idk maybe im just focusing too much on rick to notice if morty has autistic traits#im just always staring at ricks face cant see anything else lmao#fr tho drop your reasonings or autistic morty headcannons#go crazy i wanna hear it all#alex says shit#rick and morty#morty smith#autistic morty smith#rick sanchez
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sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:
thing that I already do
thing I have tried 10 times
thing I already do
thing that I don't have the money to do
thing I already do
thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail
thing that is impossible given my situation
thing that doesn't apply to me
thing that I already do
thing I have already tried
hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently
thing I have already done
#I think maybe productivity tips help less if the reason you're unproductive is partially like.. physcial health and other extenral things#out of your control. rather than just like having trouble paying attention or spending too much time on tiktok or whatever#all the strategic to do lists in the world are not going to somehow prevent me from waking up with a debilitating migraine or whatever#or having external stressors or lacking resources and connections or other Productivity Essentials etc.#especially many tips involve stuff like 'cut off from social media' since thats the modern day time waster for so many poeple#and it's like.. lol.. i can hardly even maintain a blog even thuogh i actively WANT TO DO SO. 'shut off your smart phone!' already#done babey i fucking hate smart phones i shall never use an app unless i am forced to. 'delete tiktok' yep. already covered. tiktok and#all of those thinsg are my enemies. 'save money by cancelling some of your services' cool. already ahead of you.#who the fuck is out here paying for like 10 different subscription services. pirated videos uploaded to google drive and youtube to mp3#my beloved. etc. etc. and so on. 'socialize less' .........LOL.. if only you knew.. mr.writer of the article. i can barely muster#talking to friends more than once a month and even less if I'm actively sick (often occurence) etc. etc. ... hewoo#I think maybe instead of generic productivity tips I need more like.. how to refocus and be productive anyway even if you have a headache#or are nauseous or etc. Not that those are always things to ignore. and of course you should let your body rest and etc. But plenty of peop#e have mild physical symptoms and just work through them. Ithink something about the way my body/mind is SOO hyper attuned to all#sensory information just makes it like... constantly 'GRR well I cant focus on WRITING right now because my lef#t ear feels weird and my socks are too itchy and my back has a strange pressure and I'm vaguely warm and my eye feels some ssort of#way it doesnt normally feel and I'm hyperaware of my breathing and also nauseous for no reason' and like half of those things I#think '''normal''' people wouldnt even notice or at least would be able to just live through. but for me it's like.. nealry impossible to i#gnore and soooo distracting always. like 'wahh.. nooo we can't draw or get anything done.. my legs feel slightly heavy or something!!'#like............. ok......... who cares. thats not even a PAIN sensation it's just something weird. but it's just like.. NO. constant#mental alerts about the 'heaviness' of your legs be upon ye. Though Imean like.. yes.. 70% of the time I am in genuine pain#or having some sort of actual ailment with trackable physical symptoms. but sometimes it's just like... we could totally be working right#now and ignoring this silly thing but my brain is fixated on it for no reason uncontrollably. etc. etc. I guess it's the same way that like#most people can go to a grocery store without the whole experience being so overwhelming and so much stuff going on at once#that they have to rest afterwards but like.. in my own HOME doing NOTHING i feel like I should be able to not get overwhelmed lol. ANYWAY#Rolling my bastard little rock up a dumbass hill and so on and so forth
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i feel like a lot of people donât understand that thereâs a time and place for your opinions. anyone can have opinions, itâs part of being human, but that doesnât mean you get to voice those opinions whenever you want. one example i can think of is people publicly voicing their opinions about certain foods. sure you might think that overly sweet coffees are gross, or plain food isnât good (etc etc), but there are people who like those things. just because you have an opinion about something, or a preference, does not give you the right to be an asshole and make people feel bad about their own opinions and preferences.
going out of your way to point out that you donât like something to someone who does just reads as asshole behavior. and iâm talking about instances where someone will go above and beyond to make sure that you know that they absolutely dislike and hate the thing that you mentioned liking. even in situations where you donât necessarily know if someone youâre speaking to is a fan of something or not, i really donât see a reason to immediately start hating on something unless youâre close to a person and know what they like and dislike.
#am i making sense?#essentially what Iâm saying is that people have gotten too comfortable being assholes#and i just think that people should keep an open mind about things they donât like or donât understand#âplain food is so disgusting and gross why would anyone eat thatâ maybe they have sensory issues#maybe theyâre allergic to things#maybe they just donât like spicy and seasoned foods#âthis video game is so fucking trash this tv show is so stupid this movie is so cringeâ#there are people who like that thing youâre hating on and#maybe iâm the only one who cares but i personally care about what other people like and wouldnât want to ruin their day if they#accidentally came across my post#if you really just want to hate on something why not talk to a partner or a friend who you know or believe will share similar opinions#robin rants
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i kinda want to live again
#not a vent#not literal#like. i wanna do things again. i wanna go places. i donât wanna be holed up anymore#saw a mutual baking cookies#and my immediate thought was wow. life is so fucking wonderful#a stranger somewhere thousands of miles away from me is baking cookies. and i get to see a photo of it#and the color of the counter was the same as my friendâs old counter back in their childhood home#it gave me weird motivation to keep pushing through#very odd.#life is beautiful#i am mentally stable btw. just anxiety takes over my every waking moment#i am not in danger of myself donât worry hang#GANG NOT HANG#THAT WAS THE WORST POSSIBLE TYPI I COULDVE MADE GIVEN THE CONTEXT OMG#i wanna live again#Iâm going to join a club i think#start going to the library and chat up the librarians#maybe see if i can help them put away books. just for fun.#maybe i can get a job#maybe i can do this#maybe i can start saving up to move out. or go to college#im already starting to get a service dog. maybe i can do it#only issue is that driving is sensory hell for me so I struggle with it a lot#sooo#ill find a way#public transport here i come
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could you write about Thena being very sensitive to loud noises and Gil comforting her by covering her ears etc. love your work!!
"Um, Thena?"
"What?!"
Heads turned towards the usually quiet Warrior Eternal. It wasn't just that her voice was soft, it was that she was usually on the reticent side. But everyone all but trembled as she barked at them all.
Sersi froze on the spot, her hand half extended in front of her. "I-I was just wondering if...never mind."
Thena sighed. Her face was still somewhat twisted into a deeply displeased expression. But she walked closer to her. "I'm sorry, Sersi. What did you need?"
The Elemental Eternal still hesitated, but she tried to force the words out. "W-Well, this batch is ready--if you could help us all carry them to the centre square. If you can't that's okay!"
"It's fine," the Warrior Eternal grumbled, already walking past her sister towards the piles upon piles of fire crackers they had fashioned for the festival. It was a celebration for the new lunar cycle. They were doing their duty by helping the locals with their cultural traditions.
The humans backed away as Thena leaned over to pick up their burden for them. They muttered a little, bowing and smiling. It was closer to cowering than anything.
All things considered, she probably should have done more to discourage their fear--assure them that she was here to help. But as more fireworks 'tests' went off her face was simply unable to relax. "It's nothing."
Even Sersi gave her some space as they began walking. Their loads were large, perhaps suspiciously large but not impossibly. Sersi cleared her throat, "how are you doing?"
"Fine."
Sersi tried again. "Really? I know they're testing the gun powder a lot lately. And I'm sure no one would say anything if you didn't want to-"
"I'm fine, Sersi." Thena walked ahead, towards the head splitting ruckus taking place in the centre of town. As Sersi said, the tests for their celebrations were happening near constantly now that they were so close.
Phastos was proud of their quick advancement with the new chemical compound. Sersi and Ajak were delighted to learn about what they had developed culturally around this time of year and what it meant to them. The 'younger' ones - as Thena considered them were just excited to have a night that wasn't fighting and watch duty and diplomacy and watch duty and sparring with Ikaris and more watch duty.
Gilgamesh was on watch duty at this very moment.
Another round of firecrackers went off. Weren't humans supposed to be fragile? How could they possibly endure this kind of cacophony?! Thena walked faster. The sooner she could drop off this load the sooner she could leave.
The humans around her jumped like crickets.
"Here!" she belted, slamming down the half a barrel of supplies. She was still restraining herself. She didn't break it.
"Sorry, she's...sensitive to loud noises." She could hear Sersi making excuses for her as she walked away.
"Hey, Thena, ready for tonight?" Kingo shouted at her over the noise.
"No!"
Maybe she would owe Kingo an apology. He wasn't to blame for all the excitement. But he would accept it. Of all her teammates Kingo would probably be one of the only ones who would understand the extra snarl in her tone and the stomp of her feet.
"Thena."
This was the last thing she needed. She glared at Ikaris ahead of her. "Not now."
"There's no need for you to be like this," Ikaris continued to scold her. "I understand you're not happy about Gil being on watch all night. But that doesn't mean you can-"
Thena grabbed her brother's head, making sure to dig her thumb into his scruffy cheek, and slammed it into the wall next to them. It didn't bounce like a ball, and Phastos would make her come back and repair the hole in the bricks she had made. But she kept walking.
Curse this festival, curse the gunpowder and every wretched form it could take. The sooner this was over and the settlement went back to being a quiet, peaceful village, the better. Her skull felt like it was being split in half from the inside out. There were even times she could swear her vision would become white like the clouds.
Eternals couldn't suffer a stroke, but perhaps she would be the first.
Thena turned a corner and ducked down against the wall. She pressed her forehead to it. She didn't know which would shatter first, her tiara or her skull. But at least the stone was cold, the little alleyway was somewhat darker than the red sunset. Already fires were being set, and soon the sky would be alight.
The high pitched shrieking of the first few shot into the air. The rapid pops of the firecrackers weren't absent either. They wound together in a violent harmony. At least now that they had started, they did have to end at some point.
Thena remained sequestered in her little attempt at finding some peace and quiet. If Ajak hadn't insisted on abandoning the Domo back with the remains of Babylon she could have been seeking refuge on their nice, comfortable mothership. Instead she was trying to put her head through a wall, all but curled up like a child.
She wished she could be different for them; celebrating with her brothers and sisters. Sersi was happy to help with the festivities. Makkari and Sprite would be encouraging the locals to show them how to have a good time. Even Druig tended to loosen up at these things. Maybe Ikaris could be convinced to pull his head out of his ass.
She sighed. She couldn't stay here forever. Perhaps it would be better for her to start repairing the wall she had broken with Ikaris' face while everyone else was celebrating. Another firework screamed its way up into the sky. It exploded, casting her shadow over her feet. Anything would be better than moping around, waiting for Gilgamesh's return.
She had volunteered to cover his watch duty. It would relieve her from this madness. And Gil was more suited to parties. She was quite sure he had wanted to enjoy it, too. He had been talking about all the different foods made for the feast that would accompany all the noise.
"What are you doing down here?"
Thena closed her eyes again.
"Shouldn't you be with everyone in town? I bet there's some food you'll like."
She felt like her teeth could feel the sounds entering her ears. She shook her head, which only ruffled the crown of her hair pressed against the plaster. Until two hands gently pulled her away from the wall. She groaned.
Gil pulled her face into his chest, putting his hands over her ears. At last, it was quiet.
Thena sighed. The sounds of chaos faded to the back of her mind. The breath in Gil's lungs, the beat of his heart, the rustle and clanking of his armour replaced it all. She inhaled, repositioning her forehead under his jaw. "I thought you were gone all night."
"Kingo came and offered to switch with me," he excused lightly as he pressed his cheek to her hair. "Pretty generous of him."
Thena smiled; she liked Kingo. He was a good brother. And she was sure he would come to her later with a demand of satiating his kindness. But currently speaking, she would give him anything at all.
"You must be having a tough time." He spoke gently, and the sound of his voice rippled through their connected bodies. It reverberated deep in her head.
She picked her head up to look at him, his hands still over her ears. His hands were bigger than hers, and they were soft, and warm. She nodded. He turned her around in his arms so she could look up. The fireworks were going off. Maybe they weren't so bad - pretty, even - when they weren't destroying her ear canals.
Gilgamesh kissed the top of her head as they admired the show from their quiet little corner. "I'm sorry you suffered like this alone."
She shook her head. She leaned back on him; he supported her easily. She laid one hand across her waist at her hip and raised the other one to his cheek, tapping it affectionately.
"That one's pretty," Gilgamesh pointed out as a collection of white stars exploded in the sky and rained down. "Reminds me of you."
"Hm," she smiled; he was such a soft hearted thing. A green one twinkled, not deep like emerald but earthy, like jade. "You."
"Yeah, I guess so," he laughed, admiring the show with her.
By the time the rest of the Eternals came to find them, whether to chastise Thena for her temper or ask if she was still suffering physically, they needn't have. All they arrived to was her curled up in Gilgamesh's embrace, his hands over her ears, and her: using his heartbeat as whitenoise.
#Thenamesh#thank you so much for the ask!!#I hope you like it#I have been wanting to wr5ite something for them in China for so long#Sprite shows them ONE illusion and bam! gun powder#anyway if you've read my stuff for a while#you'll know I'm semi-obsessed with the fact that Makkari's shorthand for Thena's name#looks like a firework#Thena is having a rough time#firecrackers going off truly is terrifying#like a tiny little rapid thunderstorm#The rest of the Eternals are also like#okay it's kind of loud#maybe Ikaris also has a headache#the way I think Thena would be pushing and shoving him at every possible opportunity#especially when she's in a bad mood#she just wants to go to her room!#but they don't have the domo and she can't block out any sound without her big cuddly Gilgamesh#he says oh my poor Thena here sweetie let me help#Kingo later on: y'know I didn't have to relieve Gil earlier#Thena: fine whatever you want just leave us alone until tomorrow#she does repair the wall#and she lets Kingo have first dibs on the feast Gil makes for everyone#he's a little surprised#until he learns that Gil made Thena her own little personal sized dimsum buffet of all her favs#also to be real for a second#sensory issues would so be a thing for the Eternals I mean really
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kinda fucked up that every social invitation to infodump from autistic communities feels like a lie or that it's specifically designed to exclude me from that invite. "feel free to infodump!!" gets processed in my head as "if i say anything i will be ignored or ridiculed or mocked and generally face backlash for not being autistic in the "correct" socially acceptable way therefore i am not included in this statement and will just stay silent as everyone else gets to say stuff. after all the only safe place to infodump is in my own little space", no matter how safe the space actually is. alien amongst aliens so to speak
#even in autistic communities i feel like i don't belong there. like i'm just too much or too little for everyone#(usually too much)#slightly unrelated maybe but one time i was playing this roblox sensory room game (the shitty one with stolen assets)#and i found this book in the game about a bunch of g1 mlp stuff and i was like ''oh my goodness this reminds me of the giant sundance''#like that really rare and obscure big sundance pony they made that's kinda lost media?#and i sorta infodumped about it in chat only to be met with silence as everyone else was chatting about someone's pomni outfit or something#and on god i think that was the most alone i have ever felt playing fucking roblox of all games#i know people are not obligated to respond but like. i felt completely and utterly isolated from everyone else.#it felt like i wasn't the ''correct'' kind of autistic to be included with everyone#it just pissed me off cause i'm feeling alone by being autistic. in a video game. made FOR autistic people. ffs i just can't win can i#anyway yeah i don't play that game anymore. it actually kinda sucks ass anyway like it has a lot of problems#(such as stolen assets and infantilising autistic people and restricting the AAC board to one tiny corner of the room)#(among so many other issues)#can't even feel comfortable autism'ing around other autistic people because what if i'm not doing it correctly#the autism alien metaphor is real guys đ#autism#autistic#actually autistic#autistic things#infodumping#social difficulties
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Things I did for Halloween season this year:
Wrote and posted a Halloween-themed Bones fanfic
Made a Halloween-themed collage
Wore cute themed outfits whenever possible
Went to my sister's house to watch the Hocus Pocus movies
Read a horror novel and a collection of nonfiction essays on queer people's relationships with horror media
Listened to Halloween music/playlists
Booped a bunch of Tumblr friends/mutuals
Askbox trick or treat where I posted some fun gifs and fanfic snippets
#just to remind myself that i didnt waste it#i always feel like i wasted the season by the time its over#i want to do things like go to haunted houses and pumpkin patches and horror movies#but i don't have many people close to me to go with#so i don't#and i didn't so much chicken out of the singles mixer tonight as decide i didn't feel like putting up with the sensory input#maybe there's stuff going on this weekend too#point is#i dont have to feel bad#and its okay to be sad halloween is over#it goes too fast man
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Me clicking âsee allâ on the tags of that post on why Nate likes Peter: âHoly shitâ
#sci speaks#i feel obligated to put a lengthy something something in these tags just to keep the joke up. so i'll tell you about my day.#i really wanted to get chinese takeout today and yesterday but i still haven't gotten it and it's upsetting because#i'm the sort of person who if there's a thing i really want i'll just keep thinking about it restlessly until it happens.#so i guess i'll be thinking about chinese takeout for the foreseeable future. maybe one night this coming week.#i should have bigger things to worry about than when my next chinese takeout fix will be but i'm a simple man with simple needs.#i don't know if the place even takes card and i havent seen a physical note of cash in months. do i need to withdraw money.#do i need to think that far ahead. should i withdraw some money tomorrow just incase.#i really like this chicken and aubergine dish from there it's my favourite. i really love aubergine.#do you guys like aubergine? sensory delight. it melts in your mouth. aughngh. ungh. moans whorishly.
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dust should have one of those mini zen gardens with all the sand and the little rake you use to make patterns but instead of sand its monster dust. specifically dust of people he doesnt like. how calming and tranquil this is as he puts a mini bridge and rocks and tiny tree into the garden filled with what's basically the human equivalent of blood!
#sand pit would also be funny. anything sand related can immediately be twisted#i WAS gonna say killer for this hc instead of dust but like....... idk#i just wanted dust to be a bit silly anyways. its his namesake he should get to play with it#it could also be a guilt thing. or self reflection. dust's time to mourn and judge himself. zen gardens ARE for inner reflection after all.#its like making a baby sensory experience with red paint except the paint is actually blood#horror is in disbelief and disgust once he figures out that shit is monster dust#how quaint! how sweet! how morbid#this is dust's version of an urn#urn sales in the utmv must be proportionally higher than here in our world#my favorite genre of utmv world building is figuring out what dust related products would be more highly valued#urns. dusters. vaccums. lint rollers (could that pick up dust?). what else#papyrus is like that pointing monkey with the rocks for the garden#yes yes brother place that rock right there.... and then the tree goes to the left. and now use the rake#its so silly so funny! the dust could be the dust of a previous killer and horror dust killed#he mustve REALLY not liked them. but also liked them enough to keep their dust. or maybe this is his way of taunting them after death? idk#mtt in a constant cycle of killing eachother/themselves/dying some other way and then replacing the dead with another version#anyways if all the mtt die i think someone (me) should mix their dust together#theyll never be apart now :333 forever trapped together and unable to distinguish what is themself and what is the other 2 :33 so kyute :3#today im gonna get my friend to watch underverse praying that she gets into utmv#i already showed her ink and she likes ink. i need her to like the rest of them. specifically a certain murderous trio#is this a rant of hc???? UGH!!!! i really need to figure out my own head. hc because its short#tricule hc#dust sans#should i tag the rest of the trio. i mention horrorkiller in tags.......... sure! it wouldn't hurt#i say as the bullet shoots through my skull and scrambles my brain#killer sans#horror sans#murder time trio#utmv#sans au
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maybe I really need to get back into carbonated water. the latest addition to the local grocery store's bottled water selection has been quite good actually (sparkling peach and sparkling lime-lemon flavour) in those 3/4 liter "sports" bottles...
#maybe the carbonation will keep my senses entertained enough that i don't feel the need to stuff my face with food 24/7#also hydrationnnnnnnn so important#struggling with food again. if i' not super rigid with meal prep and portions and timing i go off the rails#i just don't feel really hungry or full. got no cues unless i'm in the beginning stages of starvation#and food is more of a sensory distraction thing to me i think arghhh which i HATE#i could do so many other more fun or productive things but then i get stuck in a snacking cycle#because of textures and mouth feel. so stupidddddd#could this be considered an e.d.?????? idek#just. food struggles a tale as old as time. have felt like this my entire life#vent#sorry i'l delete this post if it's too triggering to anyone#just had to ramble and be honest about my eternal struggle#could this be an autism thing too????? we just don't know!!!!!
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sometimes I think about how when I went to college for a year before I dropped out (basically failed out,) the counselors/dean told me they can't help me at all or give any accommodations unless I have an official autism/adhd diagnosis. that might sound logical at first, but when you think about it more, it's actually quite fucked up. if someone is struggling really bad, what's the harm in helping them? why do they require a paper to get even the smallest amount of help? people who don't need help aren't going to be failing miserably without help! even NTs could benefit from some adjustments to the horrible school system! (but changing the entire system is a whole other conversation that the school system isnt ready for)
but even if you do agree to jump through their hoops, you realize it's even more fucked up that the diagnosis process requires YEARS in most cases (in my case it took 4 or 5 years, can't recall exactly now, for autism/adhd diagnosis, which would have meant i finished school before getting it if i managed to mot fail out, or i wait that long before going back, which is a whole struggle itself) and they also tried billing me for THOUSANDS of dollars because of insurance issues!!
so you put a ton of time and money into this, and then get told the only accommodation they are willing to give you for autism and adhd is "a little extra time on tests"
....
my test scores were the best part of my whole class experience. that was NOT what I struggled with!!!!! those tests were all online and could be done in the comfort of your home where you can accommodate yourself and have plenty of time left over when you finish them because you are comfy in your own space, (and also, no one was stopping you from having your notes/books/google open to find the answers,) and you don't even need a time consuming, expensive diagnosis for that!
SO WHAT'S THE POINT!!!!!!!
#mind you this was over 10 years ago now. it *could* have gotten better but id be extremely shocked if it has#autistic#autism#actually autistic#adhd#neurodivergent#audhd#school#school problems#yes i know theres rules or maybe even laws for this and its why they are like this but its bad and should change#if they offered smaller classes with less sensory overloading bullshit and other things i needed it would be great!#but they refuse to accommodate your actual needs and make up useless accommodations to legally say they help disabilities#ND people (not just audhd) and other disabled people that graduate with no useful accommodations are so strong and cool. proud of you!#ones who had to drop you youre also cool for not dealing with their bullshit snd allowing yourself to not suffer for a sheet of paper!#(though i know it can feel bad when everyone around you makes you feel bad for needed to drop out or failing out and not going back)#i completely stopped going to my psychology class because i started a week late due to scheduling issues and#suddenly we are told theres a paper due in 3 days and need to hse the textbook i didnt have yet as the source for it all#and it was in the syllabus i didnt get because i was a week late and didnt know we got one. the professor didnt notice me out of#the 100 other students in that large lecture hall. that room was also a sensory nightmare hellscape#too many students made things noisy and distracting. multiple fluorescent lights were flickering constantly and never fixed#the professor used a mic to speak to us and it had a constant horrible loud buzzing. it did that loud mic screech noise randomly#without warning. all the time. the quality of the sound was horrible so it was hard to understand her. on top of that she had a very thick#accent i wasnt familiar with so that on top of the horrible buzzing mkc quality that also cut her out constantly was auditory processing#disorder HELL. I dont know how ANYONE survived thst class but i seemed to be the only one struggling. everyone else turned in their papers#and i gave up and stopped going. was too late to drop the class to get my money back so i wasted probably a few thousand dollars#and THATS what i mean by give me reasonable and useful accommodation. test time would NOT make that class better at all#fix the mic and light issues at least or give me a smaller class with more attentive professor or something!#offer smaller classes for struggling disabled people! if the issue is not knowing who needs them then offer a switch to those struggling!#i got called onto a dean/counselor meeting because a professor noticed my horrible grades and stuff so its possible to catch us and help!#THESE SCHOOLS JUST NEED TO START BEING WILLING TO. dont make us do all the work to accommodate ourselves and expect to do well in school!
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