#maybe it’s just me being sensitive

[thelastchappie]

feel like the whole “ ‘tism/touch of the ‘tism” jokes have become too casual cuz tell me why i posted on my priv ig story ab me sitting weird like L from Death Note while im studying and one of my friends just replies with “Tism” like girl… idek if im autistic or not

[inkskinned]

we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.

"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."

i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.

you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"

i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.

what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.

i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.

"don't make a big deal about this," you said.

this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.

"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.

you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."

the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.

afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."

[enemywasp]

I HATE tiktok and the Internet in general rn for the obsession with "oh this person's smellyyy" "Brother it STINKS over here" "BOO 💧🧼🧽🚿" and stuff like that. I wish I could put into words how demeaning and patronising that whole idea is and people implying anyone they don't like doesn't wash.

For one there's something grating about being insulted in a manner like we're in nursery again. But also WHY is that the go to insult. Why do you associate these things? Especially to those you deem "chronically online". Like I don't want to sound pathetic but it feels so nasty to me.

is it extreme to say this feels tied to ableism? And classism too?

[thekittyokat]

you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah

[clowningcrows]

lol just saw a lesbian nsft blog that has “men dni” on every single post and yet their pinned post says, “this doesnt include trans men, since that isn’t clear for some reason” like hello????

[implied-divinity]

im feeling sappy tonight. shoutout to the baby tboys begging to be forcemasced. one day you will become the man you want to be. within the kink its wonderful when another man grabs you by the shoulders and pushes you headfirst in. its wonderful to share in the joy he felt when he started. in reality know youre afraid. it takes guts to let yourself be who you want. dont take your feelings lightly and let yourself explore. you are not alone but its also up to you. take care. much love.

[sirlancenotalot]

the fact that people still use the "no one would talk to a friend that way" "no one would grieve for someone like that if it was just platonic" etc arguments to prove a ship is canon is so annoying to me. yes i get it, we got queerbaited hard but where does it say that romance has to be higher than a friendship or no one said friends couldn't also be lovers or vice versa....? i normally say "popular media tropes that usually are for romance" when i talk about fiction but pulling a blanket statement like "NO ONE talks to a friend that way" is so invalidating to so much of our queer experiences. the beauty of queer friendship literally lies in the emotional fulfilment we get from our friends in a way that i don't normally see in cishet friendships for whatever reasons. so idk it's just been bothering me to see these kinds of posts every now and then. "you wouldn't do [x] for your friends" i would actually. i would sell my soul for them. i would kill for them and kill myself for them. i would do anything for my friends that i would do for a partner. the "proof" for a ship doesn't have to be by invalidating their friendship. also like aren't most of the ships so powerful when they're also each other's closest friends? do y'all not think of your partners as your best friends?

[faunandfloraas]

you can make fun of felix for sounding dumb when he speaks, he does say some very funny and questionable, somewhat bizarre things at times, but there's a certain point where I am going to judge you for it a little bit <3

[2jam4u]

I just had a really weird experience.

I mean, not that weird, because it’s common. But it took me by surprise and made me feel like shit when I thought things were gonna be neutral.

I had a meeting/event today at school for my department and my research lab was joining so I went along. I knew at least 10+ people in the room and sat with my lab members and yet… no one spoke to me. No one looked at me. Professors, students, everyone was connecting with each other, sitting in ways that included each other, whatever. But not one person connected with me.

It was also weird because as I sat down I was distinctly aware that I was the only black person in the room. One of two non white people, but the only very visibly radicalized person and a woman at that. And I feel like I was highly visible and yet invisible. My blackness felt like a spotlight on me, the vibe in the room was that I didn’t belong, and it felt like I was being purposefully excluded.

People I was friendly with didn’t look at me, people I know well and had just spoken to the day before pretended I wasn’t there. When I tried speaking to someone, at the first lul in conversation he turned away from me to speak to a white person beside me.

I knew that this was going to be a big issue especially considering my chosen academic field, but damn if it doesn’t feel shitty to be in the middle of it. And with academia, personal connections matter almost as much as your mind so I now feel like I’ve got an even steeper uphill battle to make it far in my field or even be recognized or allowed in than I thought before. Maybe I’m catastrophizing but now I feel like I have to be the smartest person in the room for the rest of my life so that value forces people to let me in. Which is fine, I can do that. But I didn’t want to have to.

Idk, feeling really alienated and discouraged. I know this is par for the course in predominantly white space, and especially academia, but it still stings when it happens.

[krispiecake]

tell me why i can hear another tenants fucking music from my flat. HE DOESNT EVEN LIVE IN MY BUILDING. HE LIVES IN A COMPLETELY SEPARATE BUILDING ON THE SECOND FLOOR AND I CAN HEAR HIS MUSIC FROM MY FLAT. MY FLAT WHICH IS IN A DIFFERENT SEPARATE BUILDING.

[spinnysocks]

i don't know how else to say this but we as a society need to stop seeing small pet death as funny. in fact, we need to stop normalising putting them in danger for our entertainment. i have owned hamsters all my life; they are such beautiful little creatures. they are so fragile that it made me so anxious for them because i cared for them. yet, movies or tv shows present hamster death as a joke somehow. this must have had a knock-on effect on people's views because i have seen so many people making fun of a dead pet on social media. i have seen so many people laugh because somebody's pet hamster died/because someone is grieving it. is it funny because you see them as small and insignificant? because a hamster is seen as a stupid, tiny creature that holds no worth? so you laugh at its death? i genuinely cannot understand it. where is the joke. i feel genuine grief for hamsters who have been put in danger or died because of neglect, just to be recorded and laughed at by the same species who domesticated them. the same species who made them pets and are supposed to look after them. yeah maybe i'm sensitive but i think i should be. how could the death of a tiny, innocent, unknowing little animal we made our pets, an animal so fragile and reliant on us, be funny.

[epickiya722]

I won't lie, it rubs me the wrong way very much that some will view Miruko as the "angry one" like Bakugou when she actually only really gotten angry in a fight and in the one funny scene with Bakugou.

Other than that, she actually doesn't get angry. She's chill most of the time we see her or hyperactive.

Even as a kid, she actually wasn't an "angry child". She was just rowdy, but chill. (Read Vigilantes.)

I'm sorry but a child acting out sometimes doesn't mean they're an angry child. They just like to rebel a little.

Bakugou is angry a lot, but he doesn't sneak out and break into underground fights, now does he? (Miruko did that during her school days.)

So, no, I don't think she's an "angry" person. She gets angry in any situation like anyone would be.

[camembri]

every time I see people talking about post-canon one piece and about how the strawhats all go their separate ways it makes me want to start climbing walls and gnawing on the plaster!!!! what do you Mean the found family is going to split up... what do you mean they don't sail together forever... how else are they supposed to satisfy that itch under their skin... who else is meant to understand them... who else has seen their most agonizing moments and their best victories...

[beth-purcell]

The Ink Demonth: Regret

The consequences of one's actions are rarely affecting just themselves, so it's often a source of regret when the chaos happens, and your options are limited to just bearing witness to it...

Beth ranting and rambling ahead, so I'll put it under a cut so you can ignore, but this one has thoughts and feels regarding the fandom.

I got to admit that it's incredibly frustrating as a fan of this series to not only witness the tomfoolery of the Dev Team, but also the tomfoolery of the fan base who despite being given every opportunity to stop while their ahead and told point-blank the consequences of continuing with their goals, they seemed bound and determined to play chicken with companies that are well within their right to smite them and have done so multiple times before. And the bigger issue is that it won't just be the individual that gets affected when the consequences come around, and we all have to suffer, whether it be through harsher fan content policies, a change in what's considered canon, or just deciding that Bendy as an IP is not worth the monetary risk and scrap it all, among many other nasty possibilities.

And I also know that this problem is only going to get worse as newer games come out and the team keeps flip-flopping on what they want Bendy to be. Because I can lay money that if Bendy: The Cage does even the tiniest bit poorly, there will be such a pivot, you'd think we were at a dance studio instead of an animation one.

[fleabagdiaz]

NO I WILL NOT zip my lips. it’s actually sossoosooso crazy that tommy calls buck evan. like. that’s not his name!!!! the people who know him call him BUCK. this is not even subtext it is TEXT. and I will never find it cute that tommy does it. I have never even found it cute when eddie does it in fics!!!! because it’s NOT his name!!! it is representative of a person to whom he no longer feels a strong connection, it is a name to which he no longer feels a strong connection. because everyone in his life that loves him calls him buck. and it’s actually kind of fucked up to me that he’s like having this journey of queer self-discovery or whatever. and it’s tied to this guy that insists on calling him by a different name than every other important person in his life. like is that not weird to. certain individuals. ? his first queer relationship being dissociated from the name that he has said people who know him call him? like it’s sequestered from the rest of him, rather than being a part of the whole person that he is??? I don’t like it!!!!!! at allllllll!!!!!!!!

[batsplat]

bat splat thank youuu for saying the pecco jorge rivalry is just for pecco as opposed to having the specter of Vale hanging over it. I want to ask tho, I have been seeing people say the only reason pecco wins the race is because he copies jorge's setup throughout friday/saturday/Sprint. Wanted your opinion on this because I have also heard that Pecco gives decent engineering input and builds his race slowly over the weekend. Was just confused about how much data sharing can actually help, and how much does it help with the ducati specifically!! Have a nice day, love your posts

have a good day too, anon!! and I will gladly spread the pecco narrative independence agenda!! it's something I really do like about the rivalry - expanded a bit in the comments under this, but it's neat to have something that really is Just Pecco's. from inception it's very much his own rivalry, his own narrative... idk, this sport is too reliant on valentino to provide any kind of narrative tension, and it's just sort of refreshing to see this multi-year narrative play out that has fuck all to do with that guy. enough

on the set-up copying, obviously that is bullshit. I mean, to be clear, I'm sure pecco absolutely copies the set-ups of other ducati riders, but that's very much a mutual process - it's something that benefits all the ducati riders, and they've all openly spoken about this. it's very helpful to be able to see the data from seven other riders!! that's a big part of why ducati has been so bloody good!! the main difference is that jorge tends to be faster from the start of the weekend, whereas pecco tends to take time to reach his level. which I suppose makes some people draw the conclusion that pecco is only fast once he's copied someone's set-up. again, this isn't the case - it is just a difference in approaches. points come... well, unfortunately, not just on sunday anymore, but they certainly do not come on a friday. pecco knows this, which is also why sometimes he's not even trying to top an fp1 session - this year there have been quite a few instances of jorge but not pecco throwing on a fresh set of tyres towards the end of fp1 and setting a particularly impressive lap time. there's also nothing wrong with THAT approach, jorge is playing to his strengths, but at a certain point we're just talking different run plans

(there is also a very obvious logical fallacy with this line of reasoning. if you are copying someone's set-up, then by definition you have the same set-up as them. and if you beat someone with the same set-up, then it stands to reason that you were riding better than them. sure, you can argue the success is less earned because your team... idk, just lazed around all weekend, but at the end of the day surely you still cannot be a bad rider if you are getting more out of another rider's set-up than they themselves are able to manage)

and yeah, pecco is known for giving good feedback! just being a good learner in general. here, actually, a little throwback from start of 2019 where pecco's crew chief gabarrini (who also ofc has worked with casey, lorenzo and briefly with marc) compared pecco and marc:

"A driver - all of them do this - starts at a certain level and ends the day at a higher level. What makes the difference is starting again where you were. Few have this quality: it often happens that a driver sets good times - without knowing why, without being aware of how he got there. The 'good' ones, on the other hand, have this characteristic: they achieve a result and know why they did it," explained the chief technician. Gabarrini even goes so far as to compare the MotoGP rookie with the current world champion: "I saw this quality in Márquez: I was with him when he made his debut in the MotoGP World Championship. His ability to not forget what he had learned impressed me. Once he had understood an aspect of the riding style, the set-up or any other thing to be faster, he had it in him forever. Pecco also has this quality." "In Valencia we started with a base similar to the one Lorenzo used: on paper it suited Bagnaia, based on what you could understand when you saw him riding a Moto2 bike. From then on, the normal changes to the set-up were made so that he could ride the bike as he liked. In the meantime, Pecco has worked enormously to adapt his style to the Ducati."

and there you have it - pecco's good at progressively getting better at stuff, including over the course of the weekend. as for the set-up copying thing, partly it's just typical competitive paranoia (even though it feels like the fans are currently doing it more than the riders). back in the day, valentino and jorge used to have the world's dumbest arguments about this every other week. led to one of my all time fave messy jb moments:

god I miss that guy so badly. they don't do ride-or-die like that anymore

the point is that both sides were engaging in pretty silly mudslinging, just kind of for the vibes of it. valentino/jb trying to get under jorge's skin and jorge a bit more earnestly aggrieved. as ever, if you want to read more about how that particular era of jorge/valentino unfolded, see here. this is just to say, this kind of faffing about is a tale as old as time and it's always a bit silly... you had jorge say that it was impossible for them anyway to copy each other's data in the very same answer as he accused valentino of copying his set-up. like, I'm sorry, I am not going to take this seriously. a lot of sports is about having dumb arguments

and yeah, again, pecco does gradually build up his level over the weekend. more of a valentino than a casey, it's fair to say. and that'll hurt him in the sprint format - which I talked about a bit recently while going through casey's latest interview about how sprints are satan's providence:

so yeah, casey thinks that if anything there isn't enough time to work on set-up, and mat oxley thinks it's rubbish to say pecco relies on sprint data to be better on sunday. (as I said in that post, I do find it fun if unsurprising that casey is so virulently anti-sprints, because you'd think a lot of aspects of the format - including less time for everyone for working on set-ups - really would have suited him. keeping it real.) so on the whole... y'know. maybe he just gets better over the course of the weekend. it's been known to happen. there's actually some pretty significant ways in which the current version of the sport isn't all that pecco-friendly, from the shitty michelin front tyre we're keeping for another year to the sprint format we appear to be stuck with. it's just that he also happens to be on the best bike - and the fact that he's winning a lot but simultaneously isn't highly rated by fans makes people want to believe that the current series is 100% ideal for him

a lot of fans are loathe to admit pecco might actually be a good rider so they'll find basically everything to justify that prior. including getting into increasingly conspiratorial territory. but my actual take is this - if pecco has been gaming the system so expertly that he is somehow the only guy able to take full advantage of everyone else's data, so shrewd and cunning that he can spread magic dust on his bike so that he suddenly leaps ahead of jorge, such a dastardly operator that he can steal the set-up that poor jorge perfected on friday morning to fix his bike five minutes before the sunday race, then... good. I support it. I hope he's cheating. the more unearned the success is, the better in my books. long live corporate espionage and foul play