#may he go out like perry
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I mean this was just MASTERFULLY done. 10/10. No notes.
#the fall of the house of usher#carla gugino#mike flannigan#us politics#spoilers#the fall of the house of usher spoilers#saw him in the pictures#wasn't expecting this one though#now lets hope his deal is coming to an end#FINGERS CROSSED EVERYONE#may he go out like perry#i'd also take freddie in a pinch
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rewatching dead poets society for the first time in 4 years and i had to pause to make this it came to me in a Vision:
#they’re so fucking!!!!!!!#all of them!!#it’s overwhelming!!!!!!#also knox is about to SA chris so making this gave me an excuse to procrastinate pressing play#dps#dead poets society#anderperry#todd anderson#neil perry#charlie dalton#nuwanda#knox overstreet#steven meeks#gerard pitts#yeet my deet#dps fandom i will always be loyal to you#you’re my ride or die#i may be basically a phannie account at this point but many moons ago you and i ran this joint (aka the at the time very small dps fandom)#mwah i love you so much#guys i need to be asleep but i am choosing to torture myself instead bc i make bad decisions#can’t wait to get so fucking triggered#maybe this time neil will be ok#i’m just gonna take out mr perry and then we should be good#then neil will be able to be a happy gay theatre kid and read poetry with his faggy friends and kiss his faggy boyfriend in peace#it’s mindblowing to me how disinterested neil and todd are in girls like they Do Not Care#the hardest they tried was that deleted scene where todd just barely jokes about wanting to go to neil’s rehearsal bc there are girls and#neil immediately getting jealous and telling him he wasn’t allowed to go anymore and then them continuing to flirt and run lines and poke#each other and giggle like lovers in the springtime bc that’s what they ARE#bog#described
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collection of my absolute favorite tags from this incredible post:
Candace and doofenshmirtz would be tumblr mutuals i think
#my personal take is that phineas would have a blog dedicated to advertising his latest invention so everyone can come check it out#and ferb would have a blog for the same purpose except he just silently reblogs all of phineas's posts with the occasional thumbs up emoji#candace constantly tries to show the posts to their mom and either#1) she goes “oh those boys and their imagination” because she thinks they're inviting their friends over for make-believe games#or 2) tumblr staff nukes their posts for promoting dangerous activities / self doxxing#“aren't you a little young to be inviting strangers to your house to *checks post* test the zoning law breaking DIY water slide you built?”#perry doesn't have a blog he just lurks on doof's to check up on his evil schemes#but his family runs an in-character pet blog where they put him in silly hats and make him say cute but wildly out of character things#somehow avoiding The Hat#and doof follows that blog because aww cute little harmless platapus#major monogram occasionally posts angsty vents about The Academy while every teen on the site begs him to get therapy instead#carl is a reddit infiltrator and everyone hates him. im sorry carl fans(???) but you actually cant debate me on this im right#OH AND LAWRENCE#HE ABSOLUTELY IS THE FATHER OF TUMBLR AND EVERYONE ADORES HIM#he posts about how much he loves his wife and kids in between rambles about his special interests (fossils dun dun dun)#i just know he's the babygirl of tumblr in his universe and candace probably hates it but secretly thinks its sweet that everyone loves him#he'll just go “ah candace look! ive received another 'note'! i do wish i could figure out how to write one back”#sorry i went off on a lawrence tangent i unironically love that man#SORRY ONE MORE I JUST THOUGHT OF I SWEAR IM DONE AFTER THIS#buford runs a baljeet hate blog and constantly receives anons begging him to just ask him out already#he hates it but is VERY CAREFUL to explain he isn't homophobic and actually belives that homophobia is an evil and unjust philosophy#that goes against the Bullies Code of Ethics or some shit#anyway when theyre in high school he finally makes a post like “yeah ok whatever we're dating now im still gonna bully him tho”#and tumblr loses their collective minds for like a week#this may be the most tags ive ever put on anything i am currently unmedicated and pnf was my entire childhood ok
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Since listing these brings joy to me
I bring to you
An ever growing masterpost of random absurd tma shit that just can’t be real /pos
- Martin actually has no middle name and added the K because he wanted to
- Jon spelling out LOL in his professional voice
- Jon singing. Brief singing
- “baaaaa” -Jonathan Sims
- Bug sex statement
- Bug sex two electric boogaloo
- Jon and Martin BOTH lied about their ages in order to seem more credible and professional
- Martin lied his way into the most dangerous job
- Jonas master plan relied on Jon being Gay As Fuck
- Being Compeled makes Elias aroused???
- that one plumber who walked into a Stranger site and was just so oblivious that Nikola called in Jude Perry so they could make fun of him and called him to come BACK
- Tim was sleeping with both a man and woman at the police station for information and records
- Tim thought Jon and Basira were sleeping together at first
- There was a guy who used a haunted coffin as his coffee table without realizing
- Bone Apple Teeth
- the existence of monster pig
- salesa was just living unbothered in the apocalypse with a woman he knew was going to kill him at some point
- the entirety of skeptic Jon (oh it’s normal that his body was fully encased in web, oh it’s normal that Sasha’s off to a wax museum every day with her boyfriend that looks like a stock photo)
- Jon asking Why Do You Sound Like That before asking if someone is going to kill him
- there was a guy who got trapped in a spiral maze and just left because he had dinner plans with his mom
- there was a girl who had a ghost in her house burning and she just went back to sleep
- homophobic vase
- real elias the nepo baby pothead who’s worst fear was being caught high
- Elías does his scheduling on Wednesday, he may be a monster but this is where he draws the line
- the s1 archive crew literally just commits crimes for Jon’s follow ups
- Sasha has hacked all of the s1 crews computers because she can
- Jon has never been on drugs but gets offended if you say he would never and also blames everything on drugs
- door man with knife hands
- there’s a guy who sells fucky items that screw people over and everybody still gets shit from him
- Jon was kidnapped three times like a little princess peach
- Gerry and his colorful shirt and shitty dyed hair and eye tattoos on vacation
- Jon keeps the rib that he got extracted by the guy who does fucky shit with your bones in his desk
- Peter Lukas got cancelled
- Peter Lukas only gave his ritual a name because he thought they were supposed to and everyone else was doing it
- Tim Stoker and his audible bisexual finger guns
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this blog is the goat i love it sm :) totally get if it's too much but i'd love drunk seb headcanons. thnx ❤️
LOVELY, YOUVE GOT THE BIGGEST BRAIN ANON /POS
♡Drunk Sebastian Solace Headcannons♡
Warnings: Intoxication, Warnings to not Fuck The Fish™️, Brief Sexual Content
◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟
First off, getting him drunk isn’t gonna be easy
His body is significantly bigger so it’ll take a lot more alcohol than a normal human person
That and he could already hold his drinks well, so it’ll take some work to get that man actually drunk instead of just buzzed
Don’t try to match him drink for drink, you WILL die of alcohol poisoning unless you’re an alcoholic
Which wouldn’t matter he’d still out drink you based on weight/size alone, so I guess try not to die is the only goal?
Doesn’t feel comfortable drunk around most people unless you’re BOTH that kind of tipsy or he’s already close with you
When you do actually get him drunk?
The flirtiest, giggliest drunk you’re ever met
Sebastian will laugh at literally everything, it makes him so much easier to talk with
The world is sunshine and rainbows as long as he’s really fucked up
Honestly? He deserves it. He’ll smile at you so softly and actually fully listen when you talk. Maybe he’s not the brightest, or most talkative, but he has weirdly good advice
Though he is super giggly and playful, he does flirt
Usually they’re kind of fun. They’re not meant to really invoke any real feelings
“Hey there hot stuff, you lookin for a chair?” As he pats a portion of his tail.
He WILL forget that he flirted with you later, so don’t try to corner him on it as some kind of gotcha moment. He won’t believe you.
It also doesn’t reflect his feelings entirely…well unless he really likes you.
He’ll get a bit tongue tied and may even let it slip that he thinks you’re just gorgeous
His flirting gets very personal if he has a thing for you, but it’s less frequent because the man is too busy squirming from just sitting with you
Think flustered school girl energy
If he likes you he will do ANYTHING you ask
Please don’t try to fuck the fish, he isn’t very smart and he’s not gonna be able to top you
You’d have to do 100% of the work, and he wouldn’t remember most of it tomorrow anyway
He will probably just fall into a fit of giggles at the offer, honestly, so the likelihood of it happening is like nothing
So unless you’re both so drunk you’re not thinking straight? Don’t do it. Dont even try it.
If he doesn’t like you in that way? You might actually die for attempting it. It’s not worth it.
Speaking of not worth it, that man loses so much motor function. His tail is apparently weirdly hard to control all the way
Will prefer to just sit with you and not go anywhere as he will not have the control necessary to do damn near anything
He tried only once to go do something while really fucked up
Stupid fishman got stuck in a vent for a few hours
Worst experience of his life, (drunk fishman claims) he would never ever do it again
He’s the kind of man that sings when he’s drunk too, but only if you do it with him. He mimics like a parrot.
Or if you manage to play songs with him somehow, he might sing them if he vibes with or knows the song
Get a man to sing your favorite songs horribly at an octave that outright hurts
Idk something like California Girls by Katy Perry? Have fun with it
He can’t exactly dance really well but he might do a fun little shimmy if the music pleases him enough
Have fun doing your shared little dances, drinking to forget (always remembering), and laughing about nonsense
I’m sure, as long as you get him something strong and a whole lot of it
The both of you will get along fine!
After all, he likes people that get him gifts like this a little more
#Sebastian Solace#Sebastian#Sebastian Pressure#Pressure Sebastian#Pressure#Pressure Roblox#Roblox Pressure#Reader#x Reader#Reader insert#Player#x Player#Player Insert#You#x You#You insert#Sebastian Solace x Reader#Sebastian Solace x Player#Sebastian Solace x You#Fanfiction#Fanfic#Sebastian Solace ask box#Ask Box#Monster fucker#Romance#Fandom#Fish Man#Sebastian Shoelace#Writing#Drunk Sebastian Solace
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Under the Influence - Part 1
Summary: While investigating a suspicious pharmaceutical company, you and Clark find yourselves exposed to a drug that forces you to grapple with its unforeseen consequences. Pairing: Clark Kent x F!Reader Word Count: 3.9K Warning: 18+ only, explicit sexual content. Dubious consent (reader and Clark are exposed to sex pollen), unprotected PIV, size kink, biting, angst and other untagged themes. A/N: Thank you @ryebecca @clairewritesandrambles and @a-reader-and-a-writer for holding my hand through this and Becca for beta’ing!
Please comment or reblog if you enjoyed this and want to see more. Or scream at me in my inbox. That always makes my day.
Masterlist ♡ Henry Cavill Characters Masterlist
It’s late, and the glittering skyline of Metropolis stretches out beyond the windows of the Daily Planet. The usual hum of activity in the bullpen is absent tonight – it’s just you, Clark, and an intimidating stack of boxes that seem to multiply with every passing minute. You may have indulged in a daydream or two about Clark just like this, but none of them ever involved so much paperwork.
You stifle a yawn, reaching for your coffee, only to nearly choke when you realize it’s gone cold. Grimacing, you set the offending mug aside and try to wash away the stale taste with water. The sound catches Clark’s attention and pulls him from his work. He offers you a wiry smile that you return, struck once again by just how handsome he looks. He makes it all too easy to have a crush on him, even though you know it wouldn’t go anywhere.
“I’ll put on a fresh pot,” he offers, stretching as he stands.
Despite shedding his suit jacket earlier, and the way his tie is slightly askew, he still manages to look annoyingly chipper despite the late hour. You lean back to pass him your mug, your stiff muscles protesting. They ache from hours of sitting and sorting.
“Back in a jiffy,” he promises, disappearing down the hall.
By now, the two of you have been hunched over documents for nearly ten hours. Half of them are so technical they might as well be gibberish, but you’ve found a few leads in the financial papers. Unfortunately, your current stack of documents is so heavily redacted that they’re practically useless. You groan in frustration, resting your forehead on your arms until Clark returns, bringing the rich, intoxicating aroma of freshly brewed coffee with him.
You accept the mug with a smile but quickly set it on the table when the warmth that seeps through the ceramic nearly burns your fingers. Not for the first time, you wonder how Clark managed to get the ancient coffee machine to percolate so quickly. For everyone else, it typically spewed out lukewarm sludge.
“Bet you're regretting volunteering for this assignment now,” Clark says.
“Not for a moment,” you reply. “You’re still sharing that byline with me, right?” You question, squinting up at him.
“I always keep my promises,” he says with such earnestness that you’re reminded once again why Perry liked to call him a Boy Scout.
“I’ll hold you to it because this story’s turned into a beast.”
Clark sighs, resting his hands on his hips as he surveys the cluttered table strewn with file boxes and paper. “It really has,” he agrees.
When Perry called for a volunteer from the pool of junior editors to help with an expose on Salvation Pharmaceuticals, you jumped at the opportunity and not just because Clark was the writer assigned to the story. Most of your days were spent copyediting stories and arguing about AP style. You were just itching for some hands-on research experience, although neither of you expected the thread Clark pulled to unravel so quickly or so thoroughly.
What started as an investigation into government kickbacks and dubious congressional dealings rapidly evolved into something far more unsettling. Salvation Pharmaceuticals’ R&D department was embroiled in deeply questionable research, from a gas capable of erasing memories to a potent drug they called a truth serum. All of their drugs had horrible side effects, particularly the latter which worked by lowering inhibitions but also triggered something they called sexual psychosis.
Clark’s freedom of information request resulted in your current predicament. Based on the sheer number of boxes they sent it was clear the company hoped to overwhelm you with an avalanche of data and make it difficult to find what you needed. Unfortunately for them, Clark Kent was one of the most determined reporters you’d ever met. If anyone was going to get to the bottom of the story it was him.
“Well…once more unto the breach,” you quote, holding up a fresh box of files.
As you lift the lid, Clark offers you a small smile, his cheeks dimpling. For a moment, you’re too distracted by him to notice the cloud of yellow dust rising from the box. It quickly expands, swirling into a thick mist that engulfs you both. Immediately, your lungs begin to burn, and you gasp for air. You push your chair back and struggle to stand as your vision blurs.
A strong arm around your middle hauls you back, dragging your feet on the carpet. Clark pulls you to the edge of the room, and you lean into him, desperately trying to clear your lungs. Behind you, he grunts, his fingers twitching and spasming against your hip. It takes several moments for the air to clear, but when it does, you watch in horror as the yellow dust seems to melt into your skin.
“What was that?” You ask, voice hoarse.
Clark is silent and looks grim when you turn to face him. “I think that was the truth serum. The reports described it as yellow dust.”
You stare at him, bewildered. “Why would the dust be in there?”
“I don’t know. But I can guess.”
You rub your chest and take a hesitant step back. “I don’t feel any different. Do you?”
“No.” He presses his lips together, a muscle in his jaw twitching with tension. “Do you feel anything?”
You exhale slowly, taking stock of your body. “Maybe?” Your response is more of a question than a definitive answer. You feel oddly warm, but it could just be the adrenaline from the situation.
“You’re sweating,” he observes, pressing the back of his hand to your forehead. The warmth of his touch makes you shudder and you can’t help but notice how good he smells. “Your body temperature is elevated.”
“Huh?” You look up at him, momentarily lost in his gaze. “You’re hot, too,” you blurt out, mortified when the words leave your mouth.
“I feel fine,” Clark replies, either misunderstanding what you meant or choosing not to acknowledge the slip.
You step away from him, feeling your body buzz with embarrassment. Sweat dots your brow, and you’re halfway out of your thin cardigan before you even realize it. As you pace the room, you realize Clark might be right — the powder could be affecting you. You try to shake off the disorienting feeling that lingers, while Clark tracks your progress with sharp blue eyes.
“Should we call someone? Isn’t there a protocol for dealing with mysterious powders?” It’s difficult to think straight when your body feels like a furnace. “Clark?” You question.
His nostrils flare but otherwise, he doesn’t respond until you say his name again. “Yeah. There’s uh, an anthrax protocol. Perry’s got it in his office.”
Time seems to progress in strange lurches and lulls as you wait for Clark to return. You’re not sure how long he’s gone, each minute dragging as the heat within intensifies and your thoughts become increasingly muddled. There’s a growing pressure in your stomach too, something that radiates down. It’s not exactly painful, but it’s persistently irritating — a prickling feeling that needs to be soothed.
“I made the call,” Clark announces, reappearing. “They said it’ll be 30 minutes until they get here with everything they need. We just have to sit tight.”
You nod, not trusting yourself to speak. If it really was the truth serum, and you’re starting to believe Clark might be right, there’s no telling what might come out of your mouth. Even now, as you pace back and forth, you feel a pressure under your tongue, as though the words are lurking just beneath the surface, eager to spring out. The last thing you want to do is reveal your stupid little crush on him.
“God, it’s hot,” you muttered, staring at the window. You press your palms to the glass. It’s cool to the touch and you lay your forehead against it, almost moaning in relief. You wish you could strip off your dress and melt into the floor.
“Here.” Clark’s voice is closer than you expect.
You flinch at the feel of his hand on your lower back but let him turn you around to face him. He presses a glass of cool water to your lips, and you grasp his thick wrist as he urges you to drink it all, your gaze never leaving his. The moment you finish your mouth feels dry and your throat itches.
“You have the bluest eyes,” you whisper. “You shouldn’t hide them behind your glasses.” You reach for them, but Clark stops you with a gentle hand on yours. Embarrassment rushes under your skin, and you draw back. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s happening.”
“It’s the drug.”
“Why aren’t you affected?” You question. “You seem fine.”
“My biology is different from yours,” he says almost absently only to freeze a second later. He presses his lips together and clenches his jaw. For the first time since you met him, Clark looks genuinely unsettled. “The reports said it affected women quicker,” he adds before stepping back.
Your hand falls limply to your side as you watch him. Clark tugs at his already loosened tie, stretching his neck with an audible crack. A dark red flush creeps up his cheeks, making the skin around his eyes glow faintly. He squeezes his eyes shut and lets out a harsh breath through his nose.
“Maybe I should wait in the other room,” he grits out.
“Yeah,” you agree.
Clark barely takes a step towards the door before a sharp, unexpected wave of searing pain rips through your stomach, sending you crashing to your knees. The impact jolts your entire body, but that discomfort is overshadowed by a deep gnawing ache between your legs. You pitch forward onto all fours, struggling as your cunt flutters around nothing.
“Oh,” you whimper, terrified as your mind recalls the adverse event report for the truth serum with perfect clarity.
Following an increase in basal body temperature, patients exposed to the drug exhibit symptoms of full-blown sexual psychosis. This condition necessitates achieving climax to alleviate symptoms. Patients who are unable to reach climax experience a marked increase in heart rate and blood pressure, which in some cases progresses to cardiac arrest.
Every muscle in your body tenses, as a fierce, relentless pressure builds. Then, like the tide, it recedes, leaving you curled into a ball on the floor. Through half-closed eyes, you meet Clark’s gaze. He kneels in front of you and his expression mirrors your anguish.
“Clark….”
“I know,” he says quietly. His hands hover at your shoulder for a moment before he finally helps turn you on your back.
None of this feels real; it’s like a twisted wish gone wrong.
“Help me, please,” you cry, the words escaping in broken sobs. You’re too hysterical to feel ashamed about what you’re asking him to do. Details from the report keep replaying in your mind, fueling your terror. You don’t want to die.
Clark looms over you, a sheen of sweat on his brow. You stare up at him, your breath coming in short, ragged gasps as the pain in your core pulses and builds. The ache in the body is all-consuming, overriding everything else. Worse is the feeling of emptiness that you know he could fill.
“Please.” Your voice fizzles out as a strong wave of pain slams into you. It leaves you reeling and disoriented. You claw at his arms, fingernails digging into his skin.
“I’m going to help you.” He says, his gaze lingering on you as he runs his tongue along his bottom lip. “If-if you want me to,” he adds, and a hysterical laugh bubbles up inside you. Of course you do, you’ve dreamed of him since the day you met him in the breakroom. You just never imagined this.
When another cramp leaves you panting and desperate you grit out a pained, “Yes.”
His large hand encircles your calf, gently but firmly pulling your legs apart so he can kneel between them. The cool air makes you groan and you try to curl in on yourself again, but Clark pins you to the floor easily. With shaky hands, he drags your dress up to expose your simple black underwear. The sight seems to transfix him and you watch his chest rise and fall with quick, shallow breaths that mimic your own.
“I have to ah, I have to…” He closes his eyes, inhaling deeply. When he shakes his head his glasses fall down his nose. “I need to get you ready.”
“I don’t care,” you sob. “Fuck me, please.”
Somewhere in the back of your mind, the part that's still you, is horrified by your words. You’ve never spoken to anyone like that, let alone a colleague or the man you have a crush on. But you know with a terrifying certainty that if he doesn’t fuck you, you’ll both die.
“It’s okay,” he soothes, the calm tenor of his voice betrayed by the way his hand trembles against your thigh. He tears off your underwear with an ease that would give you pause if you were in your right mind.
Shame is a thing of the past as you spread your legs even further, allowing his hungry gaze to drink its fill. He parts your folds and draws two fingers through the wetness gathered there, starting with light, teasing strokes that quickly build to more. When his thumb finds your bundle of nerves, he rubs slow, soothing circles until the pain in your stomach eases a fraction.
“You’re doing good,” he encourages, sounding breathless. “Doing so good for me, honey.”
You moan his name and he shifts closer, bent forward to watch himself work. Soon one kind of pressure recedes and another begins. You gasp, throwing your head back as Clark continues his slow assault, building in its intensity. When your legs thrash his other hand settles on your hip, holding you still as he works a thick finger inside. Your cunt clenches in response to the intrusion. Above you, he groans and his thumb moves faster.
“More, oh god I need more,” you beg, keening when Clark pushes a second finger inside.
The stretch of them both burns but that’s eclipsed by the pleasure you feel. You rock forward, trying to take more of him but he doesn’t let you, controlling the pace. You can hear yourself babbling, nonsensical words streaming from your mouth as he draws you closer and closer to your orgasm until, all at once, it overwhelms you completely. Your orgasm is almost painful and your hands curl into fists, your body contorting in response. The room blurs around you, and every fiber of your being is consumed by the relief you feel.
When it passes you’re left trembling on the floor, avoiding Clark’s gaze. He hovers over you, his arousal hard to miss with the way it tents the front of his gray slacks.
“Clark.” You touch his chest, inhaling when his dark blue eyes snap up to meet yours. “Do you…”
You can’t even force yourself to say it now that you’re back in your right mind. Clark shakes his head, withdrawing his fingers. You wince, and he looks pained.
“We should —” he starts, but whatever he is about to say is abruptly cut off as he grunts and hunches forward, a visible shudder running through him.
Hesitantly, you reach out and touch his face. When your fingers brush over the curve of his cheek he moans and surges forward, capturing your lips in a searing kiss that steals your breath. He forces his tongue inside and the heat of him is almost unbearable. You push at his shoulder, but he doesn’t relent. His hands travel up and down your sides and you feel that familiar pressure return to your core. It builds slowly, like the spark of an ember that will soon flare into a blazing fire.
You shift under Clark, drawing your legs up as he swallows down your needy whine. By the time he pulls away, you’re feeling dizzy and gasping for breath.
“We need to,” you begin, squeezing your eyes shut as your body trembles.
“I know,” Clark replies.
He fumbles with his pants and you look up at the ceiling as he pulls himself free. It feels like a violation to look, but without your permission, you find your gaze drifting down. Your mouth goes dry at the sight of his cock, just as big and thick as the rest of him. It’s red and weeping. Your cunt aches, and you toss your head side to side, trying to dispel the pain.
Clark plants a hand near your head while he lines himself up between your thighs. He pushes inside slowly. It hurts, god, it hurts, but you need more of him, and you need it now. Wrapping his tie around your hand, you pull hard, urging him closer. He snaps his hip forward with enough force to jar your bones, and you wail in response. For one blissful moment, everything is quiet. Your buzzing mind and aching body are finally filled in a way they’ve been craving.
“Fuck.” The curse falls from Clark’s lips and brings you back to the moment. “You feel so good. You feel…” he trails off, his words bleed into one long, low moan that has you clenching around him.
Above you, his handsome face contorts, his lips pressed tightly together. Tension lines the muscles of his jaw and his dark brows furrow in an expression that teeters between ecstasy and pain. Pleasure skitters along your nerves as he drives into you over and over again to reach some unknown place hidden deep inside. Your second orgasm rises to the surface just as swiftly as your first and Clark is relentless as he fucks you through it.
There isn’t even time to catch your breath before his hands encircle your hips and he leans back, drawing you with him. The backs of your thighs drag over the fabric of his slack as he moves your body to meet his thrusts. As one orgasm fades you feel another spring to life, hastened by the feel of his calloused thumb on your clit. The need inside you burns even brighter, and a litany of desperate pleas spills from your lips.
“You feel,” he pants, “just like I imagined.”
When you gasp his name he curls his body over yours, the new angle allowing him to move even deeper. You hold onto his biceps and listen to the desperate little noises that escape his chest with each thrust. His lips find the soft skin of your throat as his fingers dig into the neckline of your dress. He pulls hard and buttons scatter, giving him access to your shoulder. Teeth scrap over tender flesh and your back arches as another orgasm blooms in your stomach.
Waves of pleasure ebb through your body and your fingers tangle in the thick hair at the nape of his neck. Clark doesn’t falter even when you fall still beneath him. Your muscles ache, and your body feels tense and exhausted, but that frenzied need that’s driven you since the dust melted into your system slakes away until you’re left feeling everything. Guilt and horror fill your body like sand, weighing you down.
Clark groans and you realize he’s still in the throes of the drug's effects. The ceaseless rhythm of his hips has turned painful and your insides feel raw. You push at his shoulder but he doesn’t even seem to notice, hitching your leg over his waist to push himself deeper.
He shudders, gasping, “like that, just like that.” Then his teeth sink into your neck and he finally stills.
Tears leak from the corner of your eyes as your breath comes in short little sobs, your heart fluttering in your chest. After a few moments, Clark stiffens and you know he’s come back to himself. He shifts, slipping out of you with a quiet exhale. You can’t stifle your whimper of pain and his gaze jumps to you. For a moment you stare at each other and the silence is deafening. Then he passes a trembling hand over his lips and rocks back, moving to his feet in a fluid motion. He turns from you to tuck himself away and runs a hand through his curls.
You sit up slowly, drawing your knees to your chest while you hold the fabric of your dress together in an attempt to give yourself some dignity. It’s almost laughable after what just happened. Clark says your name and you stare at his outstretched hand. After a moment of hesitation, you take it and he pulls you to your feet. When he drops his jacket over your shoulders you feel a swell of gratitude. You let him guide you to a chair, wincing when you sit. Everything feels raw and tender.
He clears his throat. “The response team is downstairs.”
“Okay,” you say numbly.
“I’m…I’m so sorry,” he whispers.
You want to tell him it’s okay, that it’s not his fault, but the words catch in your throat. All you get out is his name. Nothing about this is okay. How could it be?
You wait together, Clark standing half a step ahead of you while you stare at his broad shoulders, lost in thought. He’s the one to greet the men and women in hazmat suits. You don’t catch everything he says, but his eyes drift back to you as he speaks. Before long, you’re separated, and the last image you hold onto is his hair tousled from your fingers and his wrinkled, untucked shirt.
From there, everything becomes a blur; moments merge into a disjointed sequence — being herded into a decontamination shower, the uncomfortable scratch of paper scrubs against your sensitive skin, a distressing medical exam, and then the questions. Endless questions bring back the haze of disjointed memories you’re struggling to process.
By the time you’re allowed to leave, the first rays of light filter through the windows of the bullpen. You watch the soft golden glow and listen to the faint chirping of birds. The city is waking up, bustling to life as it always does, but you feel disconnected from it all until you step into the elevator and turn to find Clark standing there.
He halts the doors from closing, his sad, mournful eyes meeting yours. A powerful wave of emotion rises in your throat as the weight of his guilt and your embarrassment settles inside you like a stone. There’s so much you want to say, so much that needs to be said, but it’s overshadowed by a deep ache in your chest. You feel so lost and unsure, terrified about what lies ahead that tears spill from your eyes, hot and unchecked.
Clark exhales softly and steps back, but just before the doors close, he whispers your name. In that moment, everything else fades away — it’s just you, him, and all the unspoken words that linger between you.
Then, he’s gone and you’re left utterly alone.
♡
I do not have a tag list, please follow @hg-library and turn on notifications.
#clark kent x reader#clark kent x you#clark kent#henry cavill#superman x you#superman x reader#superman#man of steel
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when will we get ur pnf yaoi vs yuri enjoyer list, which I assume u also have
alright. i feel like i probably dont have to explain these to you but other people may benefit.
stacy: you know she loves that girl best friend stuff vanessa: shes a feminist gretchen: i think shes a tumblr lesbian if we're being quite honest and i feel like anyone who has watched enough phineas and ferb episodes to have an informed opinion on gretchen will intuit why i believe that.
perry: self explanatory doof: also self explanatory candace: canonical avengers fan. i guess she could maybe be one of the pepperony girls but honestly i dont see it. i think she was in on the captain america yaoi train. which one? i dont know enough about the avengers to say that, thankfully carl: canonical furry. baljeet: i do think he is EXTREMELY embarrassed about this one though. i think its one of his deepest secrets.
ferb: i know he's cultured. i know he has taste. i know he's the person you go to for incredibly deep cuts within just about any genre of anything. i know he's curated that shit. norm: i think he just donwloads entire chunks of the internet when he's bored. really mixed bag in there
isabella: we know shes got that dog in her buford: critically i think he's reading shit like wuthering heights
phineas: unbothered. in his lane. likes it when everyone on the tv is hanging out and having a good time. jeremy: i think jeremy's media taste is often stuff like Sports or the great british baking show
#major monogram is not on here because i TRULY searched deep within myself#and could not come to an answer i was fully satisfied with#pnf
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SUMMARY: The call to be a Pro Hero has never been a question—not for Katsuki Bakugou, explosive and guarded, nor for Izuku Midoriya, protective and determined, and certainly not for Shouto Todoroki, who’s family legacy hangs over him like a shadow. Years after the War that upended Hero Society, these three men have helped rebuild a path to Pro Heroism for the next generation, tentatively heralding a new era of hope. But there’s danger lurking in this rebuilt world, danger that has the power to rekindle old fears and usher in new resentments, and as the trio branch out to find and end these threats, they each encounter a new challenge along the way—colliding with someone unexpected, and falling in love.
(A Pro Hero x Reader Trilogy; in which falling in love is a random chance all at once chaotic and exhilarating and incredible, for each of the Big Three)
The premise is simple: three heroes, three fics, and three different lives to live. Named for the Katy Perry song, The One That Got Away, the In Another Life trilogy was originally intended to be a series of five stand-alone fics that evolved, fairly quickly, into what we have today: three interconnected stories that let our Reader-inserts move throughout the My Hero Academia world, and eventually find where—and who with—they belong.
Started in 2020 when the manga was still on-going, the fics have diverged from the canon Horikoshi’s given us both in small and large ways. Despite where they separate (and where the fics have to stay faithful to their own canon, now), it’s always been my hope that they read like the love letters they are—to My Hero, to the boys, and to x reader fic at large.
i’m running to your side—flying my white flag
1. surrender (whenever you’re ready) [Explicit] — ao3
93k+
Bakugou Katsuki x Reader
COMPLETED ✔️
SUMMARY: You first meet Ground Zero when he's thrown, unceremoniously, through the glass window of your florist shop.
(In which Bakugou cannot stand flowers but finds himself coming back, anyway)
i’ve been reading books of old—the legends and the myths
2. something (just like this) [Explicit] — ao3
203k+
Izuku Midoriya x Reader
COMPLETED ✔️
SUMMARY: It probably says a lot about you that your first thought on meeting Deku, international Symbol of Peace, isn't something like "Oh, wow," or, "Oh he's so nice," but is instead the un-Plus Ultra thought of, "I definitely would've bullied him, in high school."
At least until those muscles came in.
(In which Midoriya is an absolute nerd for the release of his own hero-inspired comic book series—and the artist responsible for it)
all your flaws and scars are mine
3. still (falling for you) [Explicit] — ao3
TDB
Shouto Todoroki x Reader
WIP 🕙
SUMMARY: The first time you and Shouto cross paths, he nearly drowns you.
(In which Todoroki meets a jeweller by the sea, and learns the difference between the value of the lessons he's been given—and the precious things he chooses to keep)
🚧 UNDER CONSTRUCTION 🚧
i am actively adding to and editing this section, still. if you think something is missing, or you have something you’d like included, please let me know!!! i am going through all the posts and links i do have, manually, so i may still miss something and would love a gentle reminder. 🌷
🚧 🏗️ 🧱🔨���🪛 🚧
[ASK/DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] do u think bakugou ever gets so angry his mouth misses [Readers] when they’re making out?
Katsuki’s home for once, sleeping off the last few days in the darkness of his room, cocooned.
[ASK/DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] what type of jewellery would Bakugou gift [Reader], if any at all?
The first gift Katsuki gives you after Christmas is a pocket knife.
[ASK/DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] merms, what are bakugou and weeds up to this christmas? :)
Katsuki wakes up before his alarm, before the sun rises—the city spread out beyond his bedroom windows like a carpet of stars.
[ASK/DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] how are weeds and katsuki?
It’s a Wednesday, a normal day, and they are figuring it out.
[ASK/DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] petition for you to write [Reader sending] bakugou horny tweets
light it up like an ELECTRIC STRIKE ⚡️: please please PLEASE Kacchan has blocked me and muted the groupchat PLEASE, I need him to see this, please just send him this ONE THING, PLEASE!!!!!
[ASK/DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] would [it] be important to bakugou for [his parents and weeds] to meet?
Masaru will just scratch the side of his nose under his glasses and think about a younger Mitsuki, who literally would not take no for an answer from him—and a younger Katsuki, who had the same laser-focus when it came to the things he wanted in his life.
[ASK/DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] i am asking for royal au + florist au for [weeds/bakugou]
In his armour still, his forest-green cape, Ser Bakugou is dressed for war—solid and imposing as he stands on your threshold.
[ASK/DRABBLE 📖] [SJLT] what does [Reader] post [to instagram]? + [SWYR] things weeds would post
The one consistent has been art, good, bad and middling.
[ASK/DRABBLE 📖] [IAL] it’s so cute that SWYR’s reader is a fan of SJLT’s comic
Kacchan has never asked for anything from Izuku—beyond that he doesn’t look down on him (beyond that Izuku live).
[DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] katsuki keeps a pot of strawberries for you in his kitchen;
When they finally fruit he’s disgruntled.
[DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] katsuki’s quieter than usual
So you wait. You let him have his silence, and you fill the space around it with your own presence.
[DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] he tells me he’s gentle when he wants to be—
The bed dipping under Katsuki’s weight wakes you.
[DRABBLE 📖] [SWYR] you and bakugou walk home in the rain
“Y’re meant to go home, dipshit,” he says, disapproving
[DRABBLE 📖] [SJLT] bad touch (you and me)
Minoru’s skeleton nearly fists itself out of his asshole when a voice behind him says, “That was a kindness you just did, for Midoriya.”
[ASK ❔] [SWYR] if you were to write surrender today, do you think anything would change?
[ASK ❔] [SWYR] what would have been the moment bakugou knew he had it bad for surrender's reader?
[ASK ❔] [SWYR] have you ever written/imagined Kirishima’s POV [throughout the fic]?
[ASK ❔] [SWYR] idk if you meant her to come off in this way, but [Reader] strikes me as [lonely]
[ASK ❔] [SWYR] i’m literally going to throw up from excitement if you actually make a bakuweeds oneshot collection
[ASK ❔] [SWYR] i am vibrating in my boots with excitement about the [SWYR] one-shot series!
[ASK ❔] [SJLT] did you have any inspiration for the kimono Reader is wearing in SJLT?
[ASK ❔] [SJLT] looking forward to our [gala] wear
[ASK ❔] [SJLT] could we have visuals of Reader’s outfits during the gala?
[ASK ❔] [IAL] double dates
[ASK ❔] [IAL] what city/prefecture does [the series] take place in?
[ASK ❔] [IAL] how [would] the Y/Ns react to fanfic about their heroes?
[PODFIC 🎙️] [SWYR] surrender (whenever you’re ready) — narrated by Chthonianqueen
[PLAYLIST 🎧] [SWYR] surrender (whenever you’re ready) [plays on spotify]
[PLAYLIST 🎧] [SWYR] and i’d give up forever to touch you: a suggested-songs playlist [plays on spotify]
[PLAYLIST 🎧] [SJLT] something (just like this) [plays on spotify]
[PLAYLIST 🎧] [SJLT] like lightning: a suggested-songs playlist [plays on spotify]
[ART ✏️] [IAL] bakugou & weeds, deku and & scribbles & bakugou/weeds, deku/scribbles, monoma/reader — by @groshia
[ART ✏️] [SJLT] you get to witness, in real time, as [Deku] leaps from the now open door — by @getstarried
[ART ✏️] [SJLT] izuku, just izuku. just as he is — by @handlethegbread
[ART ✏️] [SWYR] when you’re bakugou katsuki, — by @okeydokiescribbles
[ART ✏️] [SWYR] haru + the flower shop signs
[MOODBOARD 🖼️] [SJLT] the moodboard trend inspired me to make this little thing
[MOODBOARD 🖼️] [SJLT] SJLT is my all-time favourite fanfic,
[MOODBOARD 🖼️] [SJLT] this is just […] a collection of things that reminded me of this story
[BINDING 📚] surrender & the widening sky — @ladybirdk
[PODCAST 🎙️] Canonically Incorrect, episode 75, season 2: Surrender (Whenever You’re Ready) — 10 December, 2022
[ spotify | apple ]
[PERMISSION STATEMENT:] You are more than welcome to print out any of the fics and bind yourself a copy for personal use, or otherwise record a [non-AI] reading of them, or translate into another language—as long as my ao3 username, OfMermaids, is credited somewhere as having written it. 🥹📚 I also love, love seeing and hearing about the work that goes into the pieces you create for yourselves, so if you’re comfortable with it, I’d love to see a picture of (or get a link to!) your efforts!!
final note:
This series is the result of several years worth of love and work, and most importantly, encouragement from the people who have come along and read the stories in it. Whether this is your first time discovering the trilogy, or you’re otherwise revisiting the boys, this is a note to say thank-you for being here. Thank-you for reading, and for being apart of something that has been so much fun to create. Fandom and fanfiction has always been about sharing the excitement with other people—so thank-you for letting me share mine with you. 🌷📖
#let’s do this together—whenever you’re ready 🥹🫱🏽#in another life — masterpost#in another life — series#ofmermaidswrites#🚧 under construction 🚧
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Cody Rhodes Supports Body Shaming
"This is a vanity business. This weird online contingent doesn't realize how important that (physique) is. We're wrestling with our shirts off, folks, it's ok to go the gym...and you hear fans be like "You can't body-shame wrestlers" - what are you talking about? We're standing there half naked and you're paying hundreds of dollars to see us. Body shame me all you want. Currently, I know it might seem toxic and stuff, but amongst the boys and girls, everyone [is saying] who does your diet? Who’s training? There’s a whole ‘nother health-conscious' now in WWE, and I love that. We’re trying to look our best."
This is normally the part where everyone might rant about how wrong Cody is on certain points, but the fact that he admits his answer “might seem toxic and stuff” pretty much does the work.
The world of professional wrestling today is quite different from the past. Gone are the days of wrestlers who were just overly muscular; now, more fit and diverse athletes are the norm.
Someone like Adam Cole, who has been receiving a lot of body shaming lately, might not agree with what Cody Rhodes had to say. Nevertheless, Rhodes has made his stance on body shaming clear and has no regrets about what he said.
Especially when AEW haters body-shame wrestlers such as Orange Cassidy, Adam Cole, Nyla Rose, Eddie Kingston, Deonna Purazzo, Samoa Joe, Marko Stunt, Jack Perry, Zack Sabre Jr, JD Drake, Beef, Willow Nightingale, Joshi Wrestlers, NJPW Wrestlers, CMLL/Luchador wrestlers, The Young Bucks, and many more, many fans are trying to figure out whether Rhodes wants fans to attack AEW/non-WWE wrestlers or just insult wrestlers in general.
Hana Kimura committed suicide following a series of troubling tweets addressing online bullying and body shaming directed at her from "fans", she was found dead in her apartment in Tokyo on May 23, 2020. She was only 22.
Deonna Purazzo was harassed and body-shamed by many "fans" and she had to make a statement about it. Cody Rhodes' green light about allowing body-shaming wrestlers is a dangerous path toward harassment and bullying. Even a champion such as Zack Sabre Jr was being called a skinny jobber by WWE fans for winning the G1 Climax, not even knowing what his face looked like because they'd never seen him wrestle.
Marko Stunt was body-shamed during his tenure as a wrestler especially when podcaster Jim Cornette fueled his hatred toward him by telling his fans to harass the wrestler. Luchasaurus was fired from WWE when he filed a complaint against many people who bullied and body-shamed trainees and wrestlers.
Wrestler Sheamus was body-shamed a lot during his tenure especially because of his weight gain. Fans also quickly pointed out that Cody Rhodes' father, the late Dusty Rhodes was well-known to have a large body type, which is ironic that Cody allows this behavior. His half-brother, Dustin Rhodes is also an AEW wrestler who doesn't react to Cody, but tweets words of encouragement to his fans.
Some critics say Cody Rhodes is saying these things because he is playing a character, so he's becoming toxic. But this is actually a genuine interview from him, not when he was playing a character. He wants to appeal to those WWE toxic fans who like to insult AEW, Japanese wrestlers, and Luchas wrestlers.
Critics immediately have something to say about his toxic beliefs:
#Cody Rhodes#Dusty Rhodes#Hana Kimura#Dustin Rhodes#Adam Page#Orange Cassidy#Deonna Purrazzo#Samoa Joe#Adam Cole#Nyla Rose#Eddie Kingston#Marko Stunt#Jack Perry#Zack Sabre Jr#Luchasaurus#Sheamus#AEW#Evil Uno#All Elite Wrestling#Ring of Honor#ROH#All Elite#WWE#NJPW#New Japan Pro Wrestling#NJPW World#CMLL#AEW Dynamite#AEW Rampage#AEW Collision
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Astrocartography Observations Part One: Sun, Venus, Mercury, Mars, Jupiter.
(Disclaimer: A lot of Astrologers use different orbs of measurements for Astrocartography. My limit is 200 km because I have seen lines that have influences up to that point, and depending on the planet, sometimes more.)
Planets:
Sun: Fame, Happiness, Vitality, Children.
Moon: Home, Roots, Family, Nostalgia.
Venus: Love, Beauty, Luxury, Desires.
Mercury: Lower Education, Communication, Knowledge, Friendships.
Mars: Passions, Action, Pain, Anger.
Jupiter: Luck, Higher Education, Religion, Beliefs.
Saturn: Karma, Restrictions, Discipline, Commitments.
Uranus: Unpredictability, Innovation, Rebellion, Technology.
Neptune: Illusions, Dreams, Spirituality, Intuition.
Pluto: Destruction, Transformations, Deaths and Rebirths.
Where your Sun lines are running through are places that you could gain or increase your fame or societal standing. And depending on the Angle of the Sun(DC, AS, MC, IC) it can also tell you what exactly it is that gives you that happiness.
☆ Despite being the daughter of a US Navy Pilot, Priscilla Presley gained her fame from being married to famous musician Elvis Presley. They got married at the Aladdin Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada. Priscilla has her Sun DC line running through Las Vegas. Sun rules fame, DC rules partnerships.
☆ Blake Lively has her Sun MC line running through London, where she has expressed her love for on numerous occasions, AND where she has made meaningful connections with other celebrities that has contributed to her social status and public persona. (MC)
☆ David Beckham has his Sun IC line running through Miami and although he retired from soccer in 2013, he maintained and even increased his societal standing when he became the co-owner of the Inter Miami CF.
☆ Interestingly enough, Blake Lively also has her Sun, Venus, AND Mars MC lines running directly through London, which is a place that she loves to go and feels happy at (Sun). A few months ago, she and her partner (Venus) bought a house in London to live in while he finishes up his filming of the Deadpool Franchise (Sun MC) which is an action movie (Mars).
☆ Perrie Edwards has her Sun DC line running through London and she gained fame (Sun) from her role as 1/4 of the girl group Little Mix (DC)
Where your Mars lines are running through are places that you could experience or be subject to hate, pain (physical, mental, and emotional), and anger.
☆ Victoria Beckham's Mars AS line runs through Madrid. When her husband David Beckham transferred from Manchester United to Real Madrid, they moved to Madrid. Victoria Beckham was singled out for hating Spain due to her remark of Spain smelling like Garlic and giving off a terrible scent. This one phrase basically ruined her life in Spain as the hate against her lasted for up to 4 years. She has said that it was the most unhappy she has ever been in her life.
☆ David Beckham has his Mars AS line running through Rio De Janeiro. In 2014 he was under a lot of fire from Brazilian locals after being accused of indirectly causing the prices of favelas to increase after buying a "slum-house" for $1M allowing gentrification to ensue.
☆ Charli D'Amelio's Mars MC is going straight through the center of the United States. We all know how disliked/hated she is amongst people in the United States. And with this being her MC line, it makes sense that the hate is largely due to and greatly affects her public persona and the way that she is portrayed by media.
☆ Monica Lewinsky has her Mars DS line running through California which we all know is Fame Headquarters (Hollywood). She was a hot topic in the entertainment industry and subject to a fuck ton of scrutiny and hate for a long time due to her intimate relationship with former president Bill Clinton (DS).
Where Your Venus lines are at, could be potential places that you may meet your life partner or long term relationships, and the lines that pass through it could tell you the circumstances.
☆ Blake Lively has her Sun AS, Mars AS, AND her Venus AS lines touching New Orleans. She met her Husband of 11 years in New Orleans (Venus rules Love) while shooting an Action Movie (Sun rules Movies and Fame, Mars rules Action)
☆ Victoria Beckham has her both her Venus MC and Jupiter MC lines going through London. She met her husband of over 20 years in London. Additionally, the Midheaven or Medium Coeli is the highest point of your chart and represents your Public Image and Success. The Beckham's are known to be one of Hollywood's longest standing marriages and have created a household name for themselves propelling both of them in their careers and future prospects. (Jupiter MC)
☆ (Also, I just thought this was interesting) Victoria Beckham had her start in the entertainment industry as a member of The Spice Girls. Her stage name was Posh Spice (Venus) which defined her Public Image (MC).
Where your IC lines are, could indicate your ancestry, or where and how you grew up or experienced your early life at.
☆ Selena Quintanilla's Saturn IC line runs through Mexico and she is Mexican. Although she became the biggest Mexican-American music artist in her 20's, when she was younger she had no connection to her Mexican ancestry (IC). She had to learn about her ancestry, AND learn Spanish before she was able to be labeled a Mexican American music artist. (Saturn represents restrictions and delays)
☆ Nicole Kidman's Mercury IC line runs through Ireland, and she has openly talked (Mercury) about her Irish ancestry (IC)
☆ Perrie Edwards has her Mercury DS line running through Scotland and she has Scottish ancestry.
☆ Hailey Bieber has her Mercury IC line running through Brazil. She has Brazilian ancestry as her mother is Brazilian.
☆ Charli D'Amelio has her Mercury IC line touching Italy. She is of Italian Descent on her fathers side.
Where your Jupiter lines are, could indicate where and how you experience luck.
☆ Charlize Theron has her Jupiter MC line running through California and it was there that she was discovered by a Hollywood agent while getting into an altercation with a bank teller.
☆ Anya Taylor Joy has her Jupiter DC line running through London which is where she was disocvered while walking her dog.
☆ Justin Bieber has his Jupiter AS line running through Canada which is where he was discovered by Scooter Braun completely by chance as he clicked on the wrong Youtube video and Justin's video came up.
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hey!! could you please write more neil perry smuts? they’re so rare and your writing is amazing
your wish is my command 🤍
It’s Just Practice
Pairing: older!Neil Perry x actress!FemReader
Warnings: 18+, smut, dirty talk, language, oral f & m receiving, p in v, fluff, MDNI!!!
Summary: It’s Neil’s first sex scene on a new acting job and not only is he terrified but he’s afraid he’ll be so uncomfortable it will affect his acting. You provide a solution.
word count: 4.2k
Masterlist
You don’t miss the way Neil wipes sweaty palms on the front of his jeans, eyes darting to the filming schedule for the week, eyes wide like a deer in headlights. Ever since you both had started filming this movie he hadn’t been nervous, in fact he was a natural, which you appreciated considering you had been doing this your whole life. That’s why his behavior has caught you off guard, the script pages fanning against your fingers as you flip through them in search of the lines you’d have to brush up on this week.
“What’s up with you?” your voice comes out sharp, startling him as he jumps to turn and spot you in your director chair, legs crossed, and script open on your lap.
“Nothing, I’m fine” he says unconvincingly and it almost makes you snort considering an actor should be much better at lying than he is.
“No you’re not, take a seat Bambi” you tease, watching the doe eyed boy nervously approach his own director chair beside you and take a seat. You know he hates when you call him that but someone so innocent looking like him exploring the world of acting on unsteady legs reminded you of the sweet deer.
“I swear I’m fine” he says, stretching his fingers over his thighs, looking anywhere but you as he clearly battles with whatever inner thoughts currently had him this on edge.
“Neil, I’ve been doing this a long time. So let’s skip whatever this is and get to the part where you confide in your experienced friend” his cheeks burn red, taking your words in a context you don’t quite understand yet, because he was currently freaking out about the scene scheduled for tomorrow.
“It’s about tomorrow” he nearly whispers, causing you to lean closer to make sure you don’t miss what he says.
“What about it?” you ask, eyebrows furrowed together as you close the script and plop it on the ground beside your chair. A nervous hand meets the back of his neck, massaging the flesh there as he attempts to find his words.
“I-I’ve never filmed a sex scene before” he whispers again and you can’t help the giggle that bubbles past your lips, shocked that of all things you two had already filmed together this was the one that shook him the most. “Please, it’s not funny”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. It’s just-, usually the men I act with look forward to those scenes the most” you offer, trying to calm your laughter down. Neil shakes his head so you reach to place a hand on his arm, offering as much comfort as you can.
“I’ve never done one before and if I’m being honest the guy who went to an all boys high school wasn’t actively getting laid in college” he tells you and this is something new about him that you hadn’t known, it could explain why he was still so nervous and sweet around women unlike some people in this industry.
“You have… right?” you find yourself asking and Neil wears a panicked expression.
“Yes, yes, I’ve been with a woman. Just not on camera, not like this” he gestures to the script, knowing the scene the two of you were to perform tomorrow was a high stakes passionate moment between lovers.
“Take a breath Perry, it’s easier than you’d think” you assure him, squeezing his arm once more before letting go.
“How could it be easier?” he asks, exasperated and little shaken up about this whole thing. He’s nearly positive that if he had known there was a sex scene he may have never taken the job.
“It’s easier because not only are we professionals but we’re friends. You can’t look at it like an intimate moment being watched by an audience, you have to be comfortable and trust me” you tell him, reaching for your water bottle. Neil lets the words sink in as you take a sip, eyeing how some of the water dribbles along your lip and your tongue darts out to catch it.
“Friends don’t kiss each other” he says with the shake of his head and you snort, twisting the cap back on your water bottle.
“In this business they do, it’s nothing, it’s friendly!” you assure and Neil can’t help but chuckle, finding a semblance of amusement in this minor crisis of his.
“Well if you don’t remember, this is only like my third acting job that isn’t theater” Neil says, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees and rub his hands together. You watch as his biceps flex under that thin material of his shirt and gulp lightly.
“Alright, here’s the deal. After filming today, come to my place, I’ll cook you dinner and we can…. practice the scene. Make sure you’re comfortable” you suggest, wringing your hands together and hoping the boy doesn’t take it in some weird way. You had been doing suggestive scenes a long time, long before it was probably even appropriate, so this should be nothing. How hard could it be to make Neil comfortable with you?
“Okay, that sounds good. Thank you” he says and you crack a smile even though you were suddenly the one who was nervous. There was nothing normal about cooking dinner for a man and practicing fake sex but then again nothing about this job had been normal so far. So you nod your head and prepare for the worst.
“Yeah, anytime”
It’s taking everything in you to tear your eyes away from them nearly empty casserole dish, the very one you and Neil had just picked at in order to delay the next part of this hangout. You felt silly even making it considering it was the only thing you ever learned how to cook and you had to double the recipe to feed more than one person. It was even more embarrassing digging through your kitchen for more than a single serve dish to cook it in.
“The food was great” Neil offers and it springs you into action, shoving the chair away from the table as you collect the dishes and start towards the sink.
“Thanks, I’m not much of a cook” you say, smiling as he meets you at the sink with his own used plate. He smiles back as you take it from his hands, setting it in along with the other stack.
“I brought my script, you know, just incase. Even though there isn’t a lot of dialogue” he says and you giggle, realizing your were more comfortable with him than you had previously thought.
“Great, why don’t we go to my room” you sound silly saying it, like a teenage girl unsure of how to get a boy in her bedroom but Neil doesn’t even flinch as he nods at you and waits to follow in your direction.
You use the opportunity to snag your empty wine glasses and the rest of the bottle from dinner to bring with you, flashing him a quick smile over your shoulder as he follows you up the stairs and to your room. He’s ever the gentleman as you set the glasses on your dresser, pouring fresh glasses as he eyes the minimal belongings around the room.
“Cozy” is all he says and you smile, handing him a glass while sipping from your own.
“Temporary, I travel too much for work to ever get comfortable in one place” the notion surprises Neil, considering he stayed in the same place for nearly his entire life. Even through all of college and into his adult years he still hadn’t even spent as much time out of Welton as he did in it.
“Sounds lonely” he suggests as he moved to sit on the end of your bed and you tip back the rest of the wine before joining him.
“Maybe, but I’m used to it” you tell him, taking the script from his hands and opening to the pages. If you were to survive this, you’d have to be as professional as you could.
“Alright coach, how do we do this?” he asks, lacing his fingers and stretching his arms out in front of him. You chuckle, shaking your head lightly at the boy who was so nervous about this earlier.
“Well the beauty of a sex scene is we have creative freedom. You only have a few marks you have to hit, other than that there isn’t much direction to follow” you explain, holding out the script to show how the script indicates where they kiss, where their hands should be, certain sounds, in only various places.
“Okay so make it your own but also hit the marks” he nods, glancing at the script as he lets the new information sink in.
“I find it best to count and also pace it as if it was real. So from the moment we first kiss, count to five and then put your hand on my cheek” you explain, pointing to the written direction on the page and Neil nods.
“Okay, so it starts with us at the end of the bed and I lean in for a kiss” Neil says, holding the adorable glasses he wore up to his eyes. You smile as he drops them back down into his front shirt pocket again.
“If it makes you more comfortable we can practice, I promise I don’t bite and I haven’t been told I’m a bad kisser” you shrug and he bellows a laugh, moving the script from out of between you both. He was nervous earlier but he also liked you, thought you were funny, and if you were this willing to work with him there was really nothing he should be afraid of.
“Tell me if I do something wrong” he whispers, ducking in close and tracing the tip of his nose along the bridge of yours. You suck in a sharp breath, unprepared for his causality about the whole thing.
Slowly you tip your head up, eager to chase his lips with your own and finally, just as in the script he meets you, unpracticed lips fumbling together as he kisses you like it’s real. You kiss back slowly, sighing softly as his hand meets your cheek and slowly slides into your hair, fingers lacing through the locks and grabbing a fistful to steady your mouth against his own. If Neil was truly unexperienced it would not be this good.
Following the next part of the script he slowly eases you onto the mattress, chest pushing against your own until your head meets the soft cushion of your bed. For once you’re thankful your character doesn’t have to do much of the work, you just let out soft sounds of delight as his lips trail down your neck and meet the front of your chest. You’re not even sure if you’re acting anymore when you roll your hips into his own.
“We can stop here” he mutters against your skin but you feverishly shake your head, hands meeting his face and keeping him where he was.
“No, it’s okay. We’re gonna see a lot of each other tomorrow, better to just get it out of the way” you urge and he nods, continuing to kiss your neck as he starts shoving your dress up the sides of your hips just like it is in the script.
“Tell me if you get uncomfortable” he mutters, lips kissing along the fabric on your chest and stomach, inching his way down.
This would be the scene where he removed your panties, the camera would be just on your face as you moaned out words of pleasure, as if he was actually giving you head. Ever the actor though, Neil has found himself with his arms hooked under your legs and head awfully close to your underwear where he can undoubtedly see the wet patch beginning to form there. You both freeze, realizing fairly quickly this wasn’t a scene surrounded by a hundred workers, that you were alone and he had made you wet.
“I-I’ve never” Neil suddenly says and your cheeks tint pink, hands already reaching to shove your dress back down and over your hips. “Could I?”
“What?” you can’t help the shocked voice that leaves you as the brunette boy gives you a sheepish look.
“I know we don’t actually have to but I really am comfortable with you and if you’d let me?” he suddenly feels like an idiot, coming over here for help and then nearly begging to eat you out. You can practically see the thoughts racing in his head and you slowly pull your skirt back up.
“Go ahead” you urge and despite the initial shock Neil doesn’t let it falter him as he slips his fingers into the hem of your underwear and slowly begins to slide them down your legs. If you had known the night would turn out like this you probably would’ve never invited him over but it was already too late, you wanted him hopefully as much as he wanted you.
“Just, make sure I do it right” he says and before you can respond with some sort of agreement his tongue darts out and glides through your folds, a squeak escaping the back of your throat as your head drops back against the mattress.
Neil realizes the reaction you made is a good one so he dives right in, relishing in the taste of you as he licks and sucks, exploring all the new parts of a female body he’d never understood before. When his nose nudges against your clit a loud moan break free from your lips, making Neil’s eyes widen as he dares to do it again in order to confirm that was the spot to get such a reaction out of you. When he realizes it was no mistake he moves to suck hard on that one spot and your eyes nearly roll back in your head.
“Shit Neil, you really sure you haven’t done this?” you pant, whimpering as he slides a finger into you. Neil hums in response, the vibration of it tingling up through your whole body. He doesn’t pull away to give a verbal answer and instead speeds up his movements that you begin to feel the coil in your stomach tighten.
It’s when he slips a second finger into you and he moans against your clit do you feel your orgasm near the edge. On instinct your hand flies down to tangle into his hair, thighs slowly tightening around him as his movements never cease. Your other hand is wound so tightly into your sheets you miss the sly look he gives when he realizes you’re about to finish. With one last pump of his fingers and harsh suck to your clit you’re cumming swiftly, tightening around his hand as he continues to coax the orgasm out of you. The whines that leave your mouth are delectable and when your body finally relaxes against the mattress he pulls away, a happy smile on his face as his heart thrums in his chest.
“How was that for practice?” he says, breaking the silence, and you laugh quickly. At least he was able to be confident in this situation.
“I’d say we were a little too professional” you respond, breath coming out in heavy pants and Neil stands from the ground at the end of the bed, smiling down at you. Yet it’s impossible to miss how hard he is in his jeans, the length of him pressed uncomfortably against his zipper, and you gulp. Neil notices your eye line immediately, suddenly nervous all over again.
“You know the next part of the script is me helping you out?” you say in the form of the question even though you both know it’s not. Neil chuckles even though nothing is entirely funny about how your suggestion has suddenly made him harder and the look in your eyes proves you’re not going to let him off that easy.
“You don’t have to, I’ve kinda already stepped over the line” he shyly says, that nervous hand once again returning to the back of his neck. It doesn’t matter though because you’ve already sat up and started tugging at the zipper of his pants, fingers fumbling the button open.
“Shut up for once Perry and let’s finish what we started. Practice or not” and with one fowl sweep your tugging his pants and boxers down in one go. You had never considered the size of him before today but you’re not disappointed, in fact you’re shocked to see he had been hiding all that all this time.
Neil’s the one whining now, member standing tall and proud, grazing his lower abdomen and leaking with precum. You smile at him, hands pushing the T-shirt up and over his head before standing and pushing him down in the place you just were. He shifts, clearly in need of some relief, but you don’t touch him just yet. Instead you reach for the bottom of your dress, slowly tugging it up and over your own head just to reveal you had forgone a bra.
“Oh God” Neil says at the sight and you just grin, hands falling to his thighs as you lower yourself to the ground, kneeling where he just was. Neil can barely watch as you place a soft kiss on his thigh, hand rubbing up to his pelvis and dangerously close to where he was desperate for your touch.
“You know Perry, of all things I never expected you to be so desperate” you tease and he goes to give a witty comeback, he really wants to, but you have your hand wrapped around the base of his cock and any words in his mouth are swallowed in an instant. You wait a beat before pumping your hand softly, when you earn a soft moan you finally dart your tongue out and slowly lick the tip.
Neil’s squeezes his eyes shut so tightly there is almost tears coming out of them. You smile at the sight before taking him into your mouth fully. The gasp he lets out is music to your ears and you take as much of him as you can. What you can’t reach you use your hand and just like that Neil Perry is a mess of a man in your bed, when not so long ago this was supposed to be an innocent and professional practice. When you speed up your movements he’s quick to snap his eyes open, sitting up in an attempt to push you off.
“Baby, I’m not gonna last if you keep going like this and personally I’d like to be inside you when I do finish” the pet name and the sentiment has your ears burning red but you release him with a pop anyway, arm wiping at your chin as you smile up at him.
“How does it go in the script? Me on top?” Neil blushes and you lift from your knees, crawling above him on the bed. His eyes dart from your own, to your breasts, to where the two of you will meet, and you can nearly see the gears turning in his head.
“God I’m in trouble” is all he says when you grind down onto his length, covering him in your slick.
“Why’s that?” you ask, an innocent look on your face as you settle above him and grind against his length again, not quite lining him up to slip inside yet.
“There’s no way I’m not going to get a hard on, on set tomorrow. Especially after I already know what it’s like to be inside you” he pants, hands gripping your hips as you move slowly against him, nearly killing him.
“You haven’t been inside me yet, in fact we could just stop right now and save you the embarrassment” you start to say lifting up, but his hands grip tighter, and bring you back down. You’re sure he might leave finger marks but at this point you don’t really care.
“Baby, I am painfully hard and this either ends with me inside you or me awkwardly going to the bathroom to resolve this little issue, and I’d much prefer the first one” the sentence makes you giggle loudly and Neil finally breaks a smile, grinding his hips up into your own and you’re quickly reminded of the sheer length of him nestled deliciously between you.
“I prefer it too” is all you say before you grab his member without warning and line it up with your entrance. Neil squeezes your hips tightly and watches with wide eyes as you slide down his length. Slowly, slowly, until you’re flush against him and your head is tipping back at the sensation.
It’s better than he could’ve ever imagined and without you looking he gains the courage to reach and grope your tits, shamelessly feeling them up. The action makes you grind against him and he stiffens, trying to make sure he lasts as long as he could. He didn’t want this to end. Yet you seemed to have enjoyed the feeling as well and without warning you’re grinding quickly against him, using his hold on your chest for balance. When the feeling doesn’t become enough you place your hands on his own chest and lift off him. His hands instantly leave your breasts and return to your hips where he guides you back down on him.
You stay like this for a while, filthy moans leaving both of your lips as you bounce on his length, your eyes rolling back every time he hits that spot inside you. When Neil is sure he can’t take it anymore he’s flipping you onto the bed, hovering above you and giving no warning as he starts drilling into you. The moan you let out is pornographic and as he continues to drive into you he leans down and takes one of your nipples into his mouth. When he feels you tightening against him he smiles and meets his lips with your own.
“Come on baby, finish one more time for me” he encourages before pulling back and thrusting into you faster. When his fingers meet your clit and begin to rub, you feel the coil tighten in your stomach, ready for release.
“Shit Neil” you gasp, hands gripping his arms and holding on tightly. Neil smiles and never slows his pace.
“Come on baby, so fucking pretty like this” he says breathily, moaning softly in your face and it’s enough for the coil to snap. You tighten down around his length, legs trembling as they try to close together and he never ceases his movements as you cum hot and fast.
“I’m not gonna last much longer” he warns and you wrap your legs around him, indicating to finish in you, and it causes his hips to stutter. When your lips meet his own he’s finishing, warm ropes filling your inside, and he pushes in deeply once more as he settles against you.
You both lay there for a moment, letting the weight of what just happened settle in. You had never let a coworker step over that line before but it wasn’t regret you were feeling. In fact your stomach was warm with desire that hadn’t quite burned out yet. You had found Neil charming and kind from the start but you had not realized the feelings that bubbled there all along. Brewing into something much bigger and deeper than you ever realized. Something that made you go through with what you just did.
“So that just happened” Neil breaks the silence and you giggle loudly, hand falling against the back of his head and keeping him against you. The warmth spreading from your stomach and all the way up your chest.
“I told you there was no reason to be nervous” you say, fingers grazing through his hair and he chuckles, arms wrapping tighter around your bare waist.
“That may be true but now I’m more nervous everyone on set will see how into you I really am” Neil admits, lips brushing against your chest softly and ending with a soft kiss.
“Good acting is all, Oscar worthy” you say and he laughs again, head lifting to look in your eyes. They’re so full of adoration your heart stutters in your chest and you realize just how gone for him you really are.
“Hopefully that wasn’t all it was, acting” Neil says softly and you shake your head, hands coming to rest on his shoulders.
“No, that was real” you admit and he smiles before leaning and pressing a firm kiss against your lips. One that conveyed he had no interest to stop kissing you after this moment. Maybe you were done for, in over your head, but at least you had this moment. A feeling, the idea of hope, that you could hold onto forever.
“It was real for me too”
#neil perry fic#neil perry fanfic#neil perry x reader#neil perry smut#neil perry imagine#neil perry blurb#dead poets society neil perry#neil perry#neil perry x femreader#neil perry x fem#dead poets society fandom#dead poets society fanfiction#dead poets society fanfic#dead poets society imagines#dead poets society imagine#dead poets society fic#dead poets society#dps fanfic#dps fanfiction#dps boys#dps fic#dps fandom#dps#dead poets fandom#dead poets#dead poets fanfic#robert sean leonard#rsl#robert sean leonard fic#robert sean leonard imagine
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unconditionally g. satoru
pairings: gojo satoru x fem! reader
cw: soulmates au, angst, deaths, historical events, spoilers on manga ig?, illness, blood, gore, fem! reader, typographical errors, listened to unconditionally by katy perry when writing this!
a/n: let's go, first post! thank you for helping me proofread @xuanzangg mwah
in every universe, you were soulmates. you were his and he was yours. what happens if one day you woke up, you weren't soulmates like how it was used to be 1000 years ago?
in every universe we'll live in, i will always choose you
" 'toru.." you weakly whispered as your lover held you tightly on his arms, a sword piercing through your chests as blood continues to seep out of your clothes.
"hold on to me." satoru stammered as he choked on his own blood.
"i can't breath no more." you said as you pant heavily.
a curse left his lips as satoru wiped the blood off of your mouth, gently caressing your cheek.
satoru groans as he looked up to the person who happened to thrust a single sword into your bodies, a person he never thought would betray him.
"i trusted you!" satoru yelled followed by a cough as he held you close to his chest.
"that's the weakness of the queen, too softhearted, too gullible." the betrayer said as he forced the sword out of you and satoru's chest. "may you rest in peace, queen and king." he said as he left the place with his people.
there were dead bodies of your comrades around, not a single person left breathing, they were all killed.
"s-satoru.." you mumbled as you cupped your lover's cheek with your bloodied hands. "if the gods gave us another chance to live, will you still choose me as your lover?" you said as satoru opened his closed eyes and looked at you.
"i will. in every universe we'll live in, i will always choose you." he said as he placed his forehead against yours. "i love you, my queen." he mumbled, his breathing getting slower and slower.
"i love you too, my king."
we'll meet again, my love.
if you died once, you couldn't possibly live again right?
you never believed in those words at first, but now, you're starting to believe them.
this man infront of you, the person who happened to always appear in your dreams, standing right infront of you.
"princess (name), it's an honor to finally meet you." he said as he bowed for respect as you did the same.
you were staring at him as he was.
"prince satoru, i think i've met you before." the said man laughed at your words as he held your hand on his, placing a kiss on your knuckles after winking at you.
"likewise, princess (name). it feels like i've known you my whole life but, it is the first time we met."
marrying the prince of the other kingdom wasn't a thing you expected, not when you're already a dying vegetable. you were born with a curse that when you reached the age of 25, it was the end.
at the age of 18, you married the only son of the gojo clan, a marriage where you thought your husband will be cruel and unloving like the books you read, but turns out, satoru loved you with all of his heart (just like in your past lives). he cherished you just like how you deserved it.
at the age of 24, satoru started neglecting you, or what you thought he did but it wasn't his intention though, he just doesn't want to see you disappear before him and you understand that. who would want to take care of someone who's death was already set.
but a week before your birthday, before everything ends, satoru came back to you.
"i'm turning 25 soon, prince." he was standing at the window near the bed, his sword on his hand as he kept quiet.
you sat on the bed as you caress the soft pillow in your fingers.
you heard the sound of his sword as you watch him make his way to the door.
you smiled sadly as clutched the pillow with your weakening grasp.
"satoru, will you be back?" you asked and he finally faced you.
satoru clicked his tongue, the only reason he disappeared was because he searched every land for a cure, something that would remove the curse that was casted upon you, yet not a single information was given to him.
satoru cursed under his breath as he dropped the sword on his hand, running towards you as he embraced you as tight as he could, hoping that his hold would make you stay forever.
you cupped his cheeks in your hands as you leaned your forehead to his.
"why are you crying?" you asked and it made him cry more.
"i'm scared." he said as you wiped his tears with your thumb.
"don't be, my love. i'm still here." you said as he shake his head.
"i was looking for a cure..i've searched everywhere but-" he let out a sob as he took a deep breath.
"really? i appreciate it." you said, giving him an assuring smile. "but we both know that the curse doesn't have cure." he knew that, he was just desperate.
the day of your birthday was finally coming.
it was almost midnight as you lay in bed with your lover.
"satoru, remember when you said that it's like you've known me your whole life?" you asked, looking up at him as you lay your head on his chest. "i think i get it now. it's because we're past lovers, satoru."
he chuckled in response as he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. "i know, from the moment i saw you, i already knew it was you, my queen."
you lay back on his chest as the surroundings went silent.
you felt his hands tightened around your form as the ticking of the clock can be heard.
"this is it, satoru."
"fuck.. i hate this." he mumbled as he clenched his fists. he couldn't do anything but to watch you die before him.
"satoru, in another universe, it's still me and you, right?"
"mhm, me and you. we'll meet again, my love."
you couldn't control your tears anymore as you kiss him for the last time.
"i love you so much, my prince." you said as satoru wiped your tears with his thumb.
"you'll always be my princess. i love you."
you and satoru went to sleep that night but the difference was he was the only one who woke up the next morning.
you are the strongest, right? my everything..
"sensei?!" yuuji exclaimed as he saw his teacher, gojo satoru walking with you, an enemy as if you and him were friends.
gojo finally approached his surprised students as he placed his arms on your head like you were something to lean on.
"this is our ally now." satoru said as you rolled your eyes at him. "right, my queen." satoru half-joked as his students were now more than surprise.
"you forced me." you joked as satoru leaned down to your height, placing a finger on your lips.
"shh, it was you who begged me to spare you."
"i did not-!"
"are we supposed to see this?" nobara said as megumi left the scene.
"welcome, ms. (name)!" yuuji exclaimed as you nod at him.
"you almost killed us before! i won't trust you for now." nobara said as she crossed her arms before following megumi who just left.
"well, kugisaki is right, but since it was gojo-sensei who introduced you, i guess i'll trust you." yuuji said, following his friends who just left.
satoru chuckled as he started walking ahead.
"gojo-"
"satoru." he said, cutting you off as he faced you.
"satoru.. it's still me and you, right?" you said as you smiled at him and another chuckle left his glossy lips.
"seems like we met again, my love. i've been waiting for you."
-
"satoru!" you forced the door open as you saw his friend, shoko doing her best to heal him.
"stay back!" his comrades said.
right, they still don't trust you. you were an enemy after all.
if satoru was standing beside you, he already protected you but he couldn't, not when he's laying on a bed, cut into half as his comrades gather around to see his situation.
seconds, minutes and an hour passed, there was no progress at all, shoko was losing her strength as she finally surrendered.
she shake her head left to right, indicating that she couldn't do anything at the situation anymore.
they left the room one by one until it was just you, him and shoko.
shoko covered his body with a white cloth as you noticed her clenched her fist.
you were standing by the door, processing the events in your head.
shoko walked past you, taking your hand as she placed something on it. a necklace, something satoru owned as she finally left.
you walked slowly to your lover as you removed the cloth that was covering his face.
your lips started to quiver as you caress his already cold cheeks
"satoru, you are the strongest right? come on, wake up now, my everything."
until we meet again, mr. gojo satoru
gojo satoru was the strongest in your past life but he died in a gruesome death.
the day he died, the day you were cursed with immortality. a curse where the person you love the most will forget you, and if the time comes that, that person remembers you, you'll disappear.
you stand before a large painting inside a museum where a king and a queen embracing each other, a sword piercing through their bodies as the king cries blood tears.
"mesmerizing, is it not?" a voice said and not just a voice, you recognized it very clearly.
a gasp left your mouth as you as stand face to face with your lover.
"satoru?.." you mumbled in disbelief, taking a one step and another as you embraced the man. "you're finally here! i've been waiting for you." you said as you look up at him.
"ah, i'm sorry but this is the first time we meet." he said and all of your hope disappeared as you took a step back.
"satoru?" another voice called him as he turned around, revealing the person. "there you are! we've been searching for you. this museum's quite big."
"i'm sorry, this painting caught my attention, oh by the way-" satoru looked back only to see no one. he looked around the place, searching for the lady he just spoke with but she was nowhere to be seen.
it was supposed to be you and him. satoru was your soulmate, not the woman you haven't seen in your whole life, they even had a son that almost looked like him.
in the end, you went back to your usual spot, where you and satoru first met when both of you were still a sorcerer.
you leaned your back against the old tree, hugging your knees close to your chest as you cry.
a broken heart was worst than death.
it was always you who dies first in your past lives. did satoru wait for you this long too? did he once watched you fell in love with someone that's not you?
you think not, because whenever you reunite with him, he'll be the first one to recognize you.
it's all because of that stupid witch and the curse she left to you.
-
how ironic that you always cross paths with the said man.
in the mall, the park, the grocery store and anywhere, you just don't show yourself to him. it'll only break your heart more watching him be happy with someone.
"wait!" he yelled as you tried your best to run away from him. he finally catch up to you as his hand burned your skin. "what the hell?" he said, feeling the same burning sensation.
he didn't even notice that you were already running away.
"just a moment please!" he called. you stopped in your tracks, letting him catch up to you as you faced him.
you wanted to hug him so bad, to kiss him and tell him how much you missed him. but you don't have the rights to do so.
"this is yours." he said, showing you a gold necklace.
you frantically searched the necklace in your pockets and there was none so you harshly took it from his hands.
"my name was engraved on it and another one. is that you? is (name) your name?" he asked as you nod. "you were that lady from the museum, right?"
"what museum?" satoru was about to say something but he was cut off when his phone started ringing.
"ah sorry, my family's looking for me." he said and he didn't know how much those simple words broke your heart.
you watched him walk back to the grocery store, leaving you alone with nothing but a shattered soul.
-
your name had slipped off his lips accidentally that led an argument between him and his wife.
he's been having a dream with someone but the face was a blur, he couldn't recognize the person.
"satoru." you mumbled as you cupped your lover's cheek with your bloodied hands. "if the gods gave us another chance to live, will you still choose me as your lover?" you said as satoru opened his closed eyes and looked at you.
"satoru, remember when you said that it's like you've known me your whole life?" you asked, looking up at him as you lay your head on his chest. "i think i get it now. it's because we're past lovers, satoru."
"satoru.. it's still me and you, right?" you said as you smiled at him and another chuckle left his glossy lips.
-
you were on your usual night walk when you're suddenly running out of breath. it was like something was blocking your airway, an invisible hand gripping on your neck as you fell on your knees.
were you finally dying? if so you were glad.
you lay your back on the grass below, your heart beating slower and slower as you gaze at the stars.
"this is gonna be my last life, satoru." you said as if he was around to hear your words.
"(name)!" you heard his familiar voice. you've been thinking of him too much to the point that you were hallucinating.
you felt your body being carried as satoru held you on his arms.
"why are you here?" you said, weakly pushing him away.
"i'm sorry, (name). i'm really sorry." he said, biting back a sob as he embraced you.
"what are you talking about." you said.
"i remember it now, fuck, i remember all of it now. i am so sorry. stay with me, okay? i'll take you to the hospital." he said as he carried you.
"there's no need, there's no cure." you said as he stopped on his tracks.
"cure?"
"this is yours." you said, ignoring him as he took the necklace in your hand.
satoru kneeled on the grass as he took the observed the necklace on his hand.
"ah, i want my satoru..please?" he heard you said and his heart ached at your dying sight. he's seen this many times now but why does it hurt more this time?
"i'm here." he whispered.
"you're not him." you know you were being petty. you shouldn't blame him from the curse that was casted upon you.
satoru was startled when you started crying.
"i'm sorry, 'toru." you said as he smiled at you, wiping your tears with his thumb.
"it's fine, i'm sorry i did not recognize you, my queen, my princess, my everything." he said.
"satoru, this will be the last time we'll see each other. be happy."
"last time?" he shake his head as he cupped your cheek. "no, we'll meet again, right?" he said as you softly laughed
"maybe we will, but you'll have to wait million years for that." you said.
"i don't care how long, i will wait for you."
"i'm grateful to have you as my soulmate, satoru."
"what's happening?" satoru said as your hand were slowly disappearing with the wind.
"the curse was lifted now, satoru." you said as you smiled at him.
"t-then that's good! we'll go home together, okay?"
"that would be impossible, plus you have a family now." you said chuckling bitterly as you sigh. "goodbye, until we meet again, mr.gojo satoru."
satoru could only watch as you disappeared with the winds, another universe where he lost you again and yet he wasn't sure if he'll see you again. maybe someday.
#nana.gumi#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk angst#gojo satoru#satoru gojo#gojo satoru x reader#satoru gojo x reader#gojo x reader#satoru x reader#gojo angst#satoru angst#gojo satoru angst#angst
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seventeen on a road trip
warnings | mentions of food, roadkill?
notes | i've been doing long distance traveling and camping w my family and acquaintances for almost 12 years now so these are js some characters i've seen LMAO
scoups
designated driver
will definitely go 20 over the speed limit almost constantly
but he’s gotten pulled over only once (he’s lucky)
plays katy perry and pitbull to stay awake when he’s driving at night
screams when he sees roadkill
ALSO he insists on finding firewood on his own instead of buying them at the local mart like a normal person
tends the fire like it’s his baby (he may or may not tear up when it’s put out at the end of the night)
he brings an axe. for the firewood.
oh it’s serious
constantly doing head counts when they’re out to make sure no one got snatched up by a tree or eagle or something
hates truck drivers with a burning passion of a thousand suns
definitely farts in the car and pretends it isn’t him
jeonghan
passenger princess™️
but he’ll be the drivers right hand man
constantly serving water and snacks and making sure they’re staying awake
doesn’t lift a single finger when you get to your campsite BUT THATS HOW ITS SUPPOSED TO BE
he’ll be shivering in the passenger seat and watching youtube while mingyu hauls the 15 person sized tent out of the trunk
but he’s also keeping an eye on everyone to make sure they’re doing okay
saved dino from a bees nest one too many times
definitely gets his hands on the aux
SNACK FAIRY
he loves packing snacks and passing them out throughout the trip
needs to cuddle someone in the tent
vehemently opposes hiking and prefers to sit in a field and wait for everyone else to come back
joshua
don’t even play with me rn he’s bringing an acoustic guitar
does sing-a-longs in the car and at the fire pit
and he’s good too it’s not cheesy and everyone loves it when he brings out the guitar
one time cheol was desperate to keep the fire going so he almost used shua’s guitar and that was the story of how cheol almost lost his life that day
SMORE MAN. don’t tell me this man doesn’t love smores
he n vernon would def teach everyone how to make smores
sits in the left window seat, second row. end of discussion. that spot is reserved for thought daughters and thought daughters only. FIGHT ME
he’s actually rlly good at pitching the tent
secretly enjoys hiking but he doesn’t want seungkwan to know that
jun
HE BRINGS BOARD GAMES AND CARD GAMES
always has a deck of cards on him at all times
he would def 100% bring cards against humanity and uno (this almost caused them to go home early)
makes friends with the wildlife
like one time everyone else is busy making camp but jun went missing and came back 15 minutes later with an elk at his side
“he said he’s hungry”
“junhui we can’t give ramen to an elk”
SLEEPS WITH HIS EYES OPEN IN THE CAR AND EVERYONE TAKES PICTURES
it keeps everyone entertained and he loves seeing the photos everyone took when he wakes up
waves at strangers they drive by on the road
last time he tried to help pitch the tent, he got lost in the fabric
hoshi
disney princess.
it’s like the moment he sets foot on the camping grounds, all the nearby birds and critters are drawn towards him
they loveee hoshi for some reason
plays ‘i spy’ in the car
“i spy…. something gray!”
“… my socks?”
also plays shinee music on blast and has his own mini concert in the car
there’s a group-wide agreement to never give hoshi more than 3 smores/marshmallows
bc that.. ends in disaster.
he almost started a forest fire the last time he had 5 marshmallows in the middle of the night
likes to play with the fire (we call it 불멍 in korean where you space out while watching the fire)
definitely farts in his sleep in the car
insists on bringing at least two tiger plushies to every road trip
likes to cuddle with someone in the tent
he also likes to play punch buggy (don’t sit next to him)
wonwoo
def 100000% brings a nintendo switch or something for the long car ride
one of the more quiet people on car rides but he always points out something he notices out the window
“hey look that horse is giving birth” “WWWWWWWHERE” (that was hoshi if you couldn’t tell)
plays along with hoshi’s ‘i spy’ games
one time he almost lost his glasses in a river so now he refuses to step foot near any bodies of water
likes to stick by jeonghan and observe with him
i feel like he’d be good at directions and occasionally drives when seungcheol’s too tired
always has his headphones hanging around his neck
enforces a strict ‘lights out’ rule and tries to get people off their phones when they’re sight seeing
CAMERA MAN #1
he loves taking pics and brings his camera everywhere they go
he dgaf if his phone is dead but if his camera runs out of battery, this man is devastated
woozi
i actually struggled a lot with woozi’s
cuz i’ve been camping with a lot of diff people but i’ve never been with someone like woozi
but
i think
he’s the quietest one of them all
tbh idt woozi would be the biggest fan of camping
esp where you’re roughing it out in the middle of the woods since he’s a homebody
but i think he would like it in terms of taking a break from the bustling city and enjoying nature
he would sit outside in the early morning and watch the sun rise alone
would deffo get inspo for songs
you can sometimes hear him humming little melodies to himself when they’re hiking
laughs the hardest at dino’s freestyle raps at night tho
sometimes borrows shua’s guitar to play something
i think he would like doing rec activities too tho
like rafting or biking
OR FISHING OOOOOOOOOO
he’s js happy to be there i think
the8
also one of the more quiet members
but he actually likes road trips because he likes to be in nature
he’ll be one of the first people up every morning
you’ll find him meditating, basking in the early morning rays in front of the smoking fire pit from last night
really really likes sight seeing nature
also if he could, he would def bring a travel tea set and make tea for those who want it in the morning
tries to make friends with a feral squirrel but failed tho
he took that personally too
sensitive sleeper so he tends to stay up late at night on car rides to talk w cheol to keep him awake and sometimes drives
mingyu
all hail kim mingyu because he’s everyone’s life saver
he’s in charge of almost all of their cooked meals
and he makes some damned good camping food
kbbq is a must at camping sites AND HE’S SO GOOD. SOSOSOSO GOOD
but he’s the biggest mfing scaredy cat
clings to jeonghan in his sleep and flinches every time he hears something in the woods
“mingyu go to sleep”
“but what if thats a bear?”
buys bear spray and read up on how to scare bears away
also has to close his eyes when they’re driving on mountain roads bc the cliffs and ravines make him queasy and his knees feel like jelly
cuddles hoshi in his sleep in the car
loves taking pictures of nature and the members
would def go dirt biking or something like that
likes to engage in park rangers’ q&a’s and info sessions
dokyeom
sings almost everywhere
in the car? he’s singing? they’re setting up camp? he’s singing. around the fire pit? he’s singing along with shua’s strumming.
like mingyu, he has to close his eyes when they’re driving on mountain roads bc he gets scared
waves to random babies he sees at popular attractions
he fed an eagle once. he talks about it every other month
CAMERA MAN #2
loves taking pics of nature
esp the sky
sometimes he sticks his head out the window (to the point where it’s illegal) to get a good pic of the sunset
loves loves lovesss stargazing
he can stare at the dark sky for hours, looking and counting each and individual star
seungkwan
designated tour guide™️
makes sure everyone’s sticking together
and kinda forces everyone to go hiking with him
side note: i love seungkwan’s hiking posts
anyway
sings almost everywhere pt. 2
their collective spokesperson
he’s the one talking to park rangers and campsite managers
likes to engage in deeper conversation with other members once it’s more dark and quiet and a few members already turned in for the night
pls don’t put him on the wheel he’s going to freak out
likes to sit next to vernon and talk to him on longer nature car rides
seungkwan on aux can never go wrong
vernon
has headphones on almost 24/7
even when he doesn’t, he has imaginary ones on
he has like 4 different headphones/earphones as back up in case one dies
the amount of songs he’s downloaded on spotify practically takes up half his phone storage
will randomly start naming all the diff plants’ scientific names
likes to look at mushrooms and plants in his spare time
brings like 3 different, separate snapbacks
vernon would most definitely make a killer smore
like he’s so good at roasting marsmallows
it’s the american in him ig
likes to poke at the fire with a blank expression
if you look at their group photos, he’s always in the same pose and facial expression
freaks out when he sees a bug tho and will aggressively do the harlem shake until it’s gone
dino
in love with everything
he’ll point out something new he sees every 3 seconds
thinks everything is so so cool
i love dino
anyway
would sing in the car deffo 10000%
yk like his drunk freestyle rapping he did in the beginning of nana tour? yea he does that at night in front of the fire pit
if mingyu whips out some kind of camping tool he’d be all “ohhhhhh!!!”
takes so many naps in the car and in the tent
always munching on something
likes to read up on pamphlets and info boards about history or science behind a certain rock formation or historical site
and tell the others what he learned, esp when they ask questions
likes to bring binoculars (idk js a thought)
one time he saw a squirrel sneak into a gift shop and steal a candy bar
but when he tried to tell everyone else
no one believed him
it’s okay i believe you dino
reblogs and feedback is always appreciated ^-^
#hannyoontify.works#seventeen#svt#scoups#jeonghan#joshua#junhui#hoshi#wonwoo#woozi#the8#mingyu#dk#seungkwan#vernon#dino#seventeen fluff#seventeen imagines#seungcheol#minghao#seventeen fic#seventeen crack#svt scenarios#svt imagines#svt fluff#svt fanfic
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a small thing that is promised to calm todd down when everything gets too overwhelming is playing with or brushing his hair.
which, unfortunately, is way too intimate a thing to ask his friends for- they help as good as they can already, trying to be quieter when todd gets that very intense look, passing him food that isn't too spicy or salty, talking loudly when a teacher is looking for people to get up front to the board, so that they'll gleefully pick the loudmouth.
but this is different; involves a kind of gentleness, of vulnerability that todd can't ask for. it means baring the parts of him that are most sensitive, revealing he's a baby bird in thunderstorms, asking for whispers and warmth in a place that doesn't offer these things.
neil still finds out.
which shouldn't come as a surprise to todd - neil has a way of catching him where he's most vulnerable, closing his palms around him as if he was a ladybug in a child's hand. careful now, don't hurt it. i'll keep it safe. i'll carry it off the pavement, put it where the grass sprouts in may-coloured strands.
so neil finds out, when they're laying on todd's bed (better sun in the evening), neil reading the script of his newest play, todd just breathing, trying to match the tides of neil's heartbeat below him, trying to slow down his own. and neil isn't sure what happens, because to his mind, nothing's changed, but suddenly todd's eyes have that frozen panic in them.
neil thinks he can feel the way todd's drowning in his own thoughts, and todd's thoughts tend to be quicksand in these moments. it's desparation, in the end, that gets neil to bury his left hand in todd's hair, carefully weaving his fingers through the sandy strands. he knows it's silly, but the urge to physically wipe the thoughts off todd's head is what makes him lightly trace his nails across the other's scalp, gentle, always so gentle.
and todd melts.
his breathing slows, and suddenly he's back, and neil's heart flutters like a dragonfly drying off its wings. he can help. not much, not always, but he can try.
he soon discovers that it helps after showers, too - todd is embarrassed enough to snap at him the first time, the first time neil's heard him rashly angry, but it only takes todd a week to come back and apologise, to say neil was right, but could he not make a big deal out of it. (and neil perry, king of theatrics, doesn't)
because showers can be overwhelming in these times, when todd's mind is a bridge wobbling on brittle foundations- standing there all wet, knowing he'll need to get out the stall, and dry off, and get his clothes and put them on and they'll still stick to him a bit and his toes will stay wet because the floor is cold, and- it's too much.
but neil can brush his hair, still wet and darker than usual, and the scratch of it along his scalp grounds him, puts his thoughts on a leash. neil will hum a song, and todd will ache with the sweet cruelty of love, the stinging tenderness of vulnerability.
and when todd gets into bed in exam season, and the sheets are fluffy and full of fresh air, smelling of spring and melancholy, he breathes in deeply through his nose. and neil walks over to him for a second before going to his own bed, three extra steps that make todd close his eyes and bury his face in the pillow.
and he runs a hand through todd's hair, and it feels like warm notes on a cello. like autumn sun falling through tall tree trunks, like a mug of cocoa, like a childhood kitchen table. his fingers trace lines across todd's scalp, reminiscent of the contrails of the plane that divides the sky three years later, like neil is already dreaming of it.
todd breathes and smiles.
good night, little poet <3
(i put this on ao3 even though it's ridiculously short, so you guys know what that means- the time of poet writing dps fanfiction has started, and the next ones are gonna be way longer)
#dead poets society#dps fandom#dead poets headcanons#dps fanfiction#dead poets fanfic#dead poets society fandom#neil perry#todd anderson#anderperry#neil and todd
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patterns of abuse with jaehaerys
this post made me deeply depressed and i reread f&b which was my first mistake.
tldr i’m making the argument that jaehaerys definitely sexually abused saera and alysanne, and likely viserra and gael, and also i hate this man. if you disagree and want to say so *nicely* that’s cool but if you hardcore love jae and don’t want to hear criticism, maybe just scroll past bc i’m not nice to him at all (obviously, i’m accusing him of csa lol).
breaking this down by each woman, so there’s 6 sections: saera, viserra, daella, gael, alysanne, and alicent.
saera targaryen
If she were the king’s firstborn, or better still his only child, she would be well content. Instead she finds herself the ninthborn, with six living siblings who are older than her and even more adored. Aemon is to be king, Baelon most like will be his Hand, Alyssa may be all her mother is and more, Vaegon is more learned than she is, Maegelle is holier, and Daella…when does a day go by when Daella is not in need of comfort? And whilst she is being soothed, Saera is being ignored. Such a fierce little thing she is, they say, she has no need of comfort. They are wrong in that, I fear. All men need comfort.
that’s septon barth’s opinion on her and barth is always right. simply put, she’s a deeply neglected child who acts like a brat to get her parents attention because she’s learned the only way they’ll pay attention to her is if she’s causing a problem.
Before she was eleven, she was stealing wine and ale instead. By twelve, she was like as not to arrive drunk when summoned to the sept for prayer.
The king’s half-witted fool, Tom Turnip, was the victim of many of her japes, and her unwitting catspaw for others. Once, before a great feast where many lords and ladies were to be in attendance, she persuaded Tom that it would be much funnier if he performed naked. It was not well received.
stealing alcohol at 10 and being a committed alcoholic at 12 is not normal behavior. it is a sign of something deeply at wrong at home. also, the way she kind of, sexually humiliated tom, someone who is too “innocent” to even realize she’s sexually humiliating him…gives me the ick re: how she views sex.
Saera had learned the art of getting anything she wanted from her father: a kitten, a hound, a pony, a hawk, a horse (Jaehaerys did draw a firm line at the elephant). Queen Alysanne was far less gullible, however, and Septon Barth tells us that Saera’s sisters all misliked her to various degrees.
i don’t like this. nothing wrong with giving your child gifts (see ned going above and beyond to get arya not just instruction on how to fight but also a specific style that would gel with being smaller than your average opponent) but in conjunction with “jaehaerys ignores saera unless she’s pressing him for an expensive gift which he immediately gives her and alysanne doesn’t get why he caved so quickly” its an alarming dynamic.
also speaks to how isolated saera specifically was, that the only siblings that like her (aemon and baelon) are usually out and about, and there’s a clear wedge between saera and her sisters, even viserra.
The screams were coming from Tom Turnip, who was lurching helplessly in circles trying to escape from half a dozen naked whores, whilst the patrons of the house laughed uproariously and shouted on the harlots. Jonah Mooton, Red Roy Connington, and Stinger Beesbury were amongst those patrons, each one drunker than the last. They had thought it would be funny to see old Turnip do the deed, Red Roy admitted. Then Jonah Mooton laughed and said the jape had all been Saera’s notion, and what a funny girl she was.
again with sexually humiliating tom.
it continues with her friends. it’s not unusual for a 15 year old girl to want to fool around with other 15 year olds but alys and perri are all guilt ridden and upset and alys is with child. it reminds me a lot of cersei sexually abusing taena in affc. when she’s caught (now, mind you, she’s been marched in front of her parents sitting on the throne and not brought to them in their private rooms. she’s being treated right off the bat as if she’s guilty of a crime and not guilty of being a shitty teenager):
“She went from denial to dismissal to quibbling to contrition to accusation to justification to defiance in the space of an hour, with stops at giggling and weeping along the way,” Septon Barth would write. “She never did it, they were lying, it never happened, how could they believe that, it was just a game, it was just a jape, who said that, that was not how it happened, everyone likes kissing, she was sorry, Peri started it, it was such fun, no one was hurt, no one ever told her kissing was bad, Sweetberry had dared her, she was so ashamed, Baelon used to kiss Alyssa all the time, once she started she did not know how to stop, she was afraid of Stinger, the Mother Above had forgiven her, all the girls were doing it, the first time she was drunk, she had never wanted to, it was what men wanted, Maegelle said the gods forgave all sins, Jonah said he loved her, the gods had made her pretty, it was not her fault, she would be good from now on, it will be as if it never happened, she would marry Red Roy Connington, they had to forgive her, she would never kiss a man again or do any of those other things, it wasn’t her who was with child, she was their daughter, she was their little girl, she was a princess, if she were queen she would do as she liked, why wouldn’t they believe her, they never loved her, she hated them, they could whip her if they wanted but she would never be their slave. She took my breath away, this girl. There was never a mummer in all the land who gave such a performance, but by the end she was exhausted and afraid, and her mask slipped.”
What does Jaehaerys ask after all of this? “Have you given any of these boys your maidenhead?” Her response:
“True?” said Saera. It was in that moment, with that word, that the contempt came out. “No. I gave it to all three. They all think they were the first. Boys are such silly fools.”
Now mind you, Alyssa and Daella have both died of childbirth recently and her parents are mad she had sex as a 16 year old bordering on 17 year old, and not the fact that she like, at best peer pressured her besties into having sex and now one of them is pregnant. jaehaerys has only asked if she’s still a virgin.
“I will be married,” the princess said. “Why shouldn’t I be? You were married at my age. I shall be wedded and bedded, but to whom? Jonah and Roy both love me, I could take one of them, but they are both such boys. Stinger does not love me, but he makes me laugh and sometimes makes me scream. I could marry all three of them, why not? Why should I have just one husband? The Conqueror had two wives, and Maegor had six or eight.”
i keep trying not to give my opinion and just lay it all out but the thing is i’d just be reposting the whole scene because it’s just filled with so much weird sex stuff. if you don’t remember it, go reread it. it doesn’t feel (to me) like regular “george is bad at writing sex” vibes but “george is purposefully trying to skeeve you out” vibes but i am willing to admit i could be wrong and he really just doesn’t understand what he wrote.
anyways remember how i said saera acts out to get attention from her parents? all she’s done here is act out, her “crimes” are basically nonexistent; beyond how alys feels about being pregnant, saera consensually had sex with boys around her age who aren’t married, and then blithely compared herself to some asshole relatives. if your teenager idolizes dick cheney that’s probably worrying but not a crime! this is not how jae treats it however.
When the princess heard his words, she rushed toward him, crying, “Father, Father!” but Jaehaerys turned his back on her, and Gyles Morrigen caught her by the arm and wrenched her away. She would not go of her own accord, so the guards were forced to drag her from the hall, wailing and sobbing and calling for her father.
The king was angry and unyielding, for his shame was deeply felt, and he could not forget Saera’s taunting words about his uncle’s wives. “She is no longer my daughter,” he said more than once. Queen Alysanne could not find it in her heart to be so harsh, however. “
saera tries to escape.
This time the princess was not allowed to return to her own chambers. She was confined to a tower cell instead, with Jonquil Darke guarding her day and night, even in the privy.
Princess Saera watched from the window of her cell. Jonquil Darke, her gaoler, made certain that she did not turn away.
that’s as her dad is murdering stinger btw. is he a creepy 19 year old? yeah. but like, making your 15 year old watch you murder her 19 year old trust fund baby stoner boyfriend sure is something.
so then they sent her to the silent sisters where she’s beaten all the time and has to pray all the time and she runs away, becomes a sex worker and literally never looks back.
The truth did not come out until a year later, when the former princess was seen in a Lysene pleasure garden, still clad as a novice. Queen Alysanne wept to hear it. “They have made our daughter into a whore,” she said. “She always was,” the king replied.
“You need her as a Dornishman needs a pit viper,” Jaehaerys said. “I am sorry. King’s Landing has sufficient whores. I do not wish to hear her name again.”
but before we move on, let’s look at one more related ick, when saera’s sons show up to the great council:
From Essos came three rival competitors, grandsons of King Jaehaerys through his daughter Saera, each sired by a different father. One was said to be the very image of his grandsire in his youth.
after her drinking, acting out, and jaehaerys’ focus on calling her a whore, explicitly pointing out that one of her grandsons looks just like jae is a choice. i know they’re super inbred. it’s still uncomfortable in context.
viserra targaryen
alysanne makes no sense here but i’m just gonna quickly explain instead of lay it out or we will be here all day bc viserra’s engagement is completely nonsensical. theomore manderly is old, ugly, has a shitton of heirs, and viserra clearly doesn’t want to marry him. also if she wanted to be queen, why is she going after baelon, aemon is still alive. anyways jaehaerys is no help here, then she goes to baelon for help, but she’s also super drunk.
Frustrated, Viserra next turned to her brother Baelon in hopes of rescue, if court gossip can be believed. Slipping past his guards into his bedchamber one night, she disrobed and waited for him, making free with the prince’s wine whilst she lingered. When Prince Baelon finally appeared, he found her drunk and naked in his bed and sent her on her way. The princess was so unsteady that she required the help of two maids and a knight of the Kingsguard to get her safely back to her own apartments.
she gets drunk with some friends again, goes riding, breaks her neck. i wanted to point out this pattern of drinking and acting out at a young age. as well as this pattern of targaryen daughters who aren’t “meant” for a brother and are promised to men who are old and with heirs
daella targaryen
i wanted to add daella because her getting married at 15 makes as little sense as viserra, and her match to a old man with several heirs is equally nonsensical. but also this:
“I would never marry her,” the boy said, in front of half the court. “She can barely read. She should find some lord in need of stupid children, for that’s the only sort he will ever have of her.”
where did vaegon get that mouth.
Daella was not clever, even her septa had to admit. She learned to read after a fashion, but haltingly, and without full comprehension. She could not seem to commit even the simplest prayers to memory. She had a sweet voice, but was afraid to sing; she always got the words wrong. She loved flowers, but was frightened of gardens; a bee had almost stung her once.
Jaehaerys, even more than Alysanne, despaired of her. “She will not even speak to a boy. How is she to marry? We could entrust her to the Faith, but she does not know her prayers, and her septa says that she cries when asked to read aloud from The Seven-Pointed Star.”
The queen always rose to her defense. “Daella is sweet and kind and gentle. She has such a tender heart. Give me time, and I will find a lord to cherish her. Not every Targaryen needs to wield a sword and ride a dragon.”
so daella is 12 at this point.
Her sixteenth nameday was fast approaching, and with it her womanhood. Queen Alysanne was at her wit’s end, and the king had lost his patience. On the first day of the 80th year since Aegon’s Conquest, he told the queen he wanted Daella wed before the year’s end. “If she wants I can find a hundred men and line them up before her naked, and she can pick the one she likes,” he said. “I would sooner she wed a lord, but if she prefers a hedge knight or a merchant or Pate the Pig Boy, I am past the point of caring, so long as she picks someone.”
i just don’t like this. other “simple” targs are not required to marry, like vaella and aelora, two of daeron ii’s grandfaughters so i don’t get why daella is pressured into marrying before she’s even of age. at least jae 2 forced rhaella and aerys because of a prophecy? what is jae’s reasoning for so sexualizing his daughter?
gael targaryen
this one is definitely a reach but i’d like to point out that this is basically all we know about gael:
Princess Gael, a sweet, shy child of seven, became the queen’s constant shadow and support, even sharing her bed at night.
and our information on how she dies is so shady:
A sweet-natured girl, but frail and somewhat simpleminded, she remained with the queen long after her other children had grown and gone, but in 99 AC she vanished from court, and soon afterward it was announced that she had died of a summer fever. Only after both her parents were gone did the true tale come out. Seduced and abandoned by a traveling singer, the princess had given birth to a stillborn son, then, overwhelmed by grief, walked into the waters of Blackwater Bay and drowned.
how does gael get pregnant by a traveling singer when she never leaves her mother’s side? why doesn’t anyone in court know gael got pregnant and killed herself until after aly and jae both die and how was this even found out?
am i implying that jaehaerys sexually abused all four of his daughters? yes because he literally sexually abuses his own wife.
alysanne targaryen
“I am forty-two years old,” she told the king. “You must be content with the children I have given you. I am more suited to be a grandmother than a mother now, I fear.”
King Jaehaerys did not share her certainty. “Our mother, Queen Alyssa, was forty-six when she gave birth to Jocelyn,” he pointed out to Grand Maester Elysar. “The gods may not be done with us.” He was not wrong. The very next year, the Grand Maester informed Queen Alysanne that she was once more with child, to her surprise and dismay.
he uses the birth that killed their mother and that is condemned by rhaena and alysanne as reckless and cruel of rogar to force on her. that birth.
at this point as well, he had abused saera and daella, then they’re gone, then viserra starts drinking and dies, then jae marital rapes aly into having gael, giving him access to another young girl to abuse…i’m aware this is a very uncharitable reading of him but…
alicent hightower (and kind of alyssa targaryen)
Ser Otto’s precocious fifteen-year-old daughter, Alicent, became his constant companion, fetching His Grace his meals, reading to him, helping him to bathe and dress himself. The Old King sometimes mistook her for one of his daughters, calling her by their names; near the end, he grew certain she was his daughter Saera, returned to him from beyond the narrow sea.
saera is the one he fixated on yet again but notable that he’s fixated on his daughters as he dies and not his sons, despite jaehaerys turning to drink after aemon died bc he was so upset.
He announced his intention to wed Lady Alicent of House Hightower, the clever and lovely eighteen-year-old daughter of the King’s Hand, the girl who had read to King Jaehaerys as he lay dying.
The Hightowers of Oldtown were an ancient and noble family, of impeccable lineage; there could be no possible objection to the king’s choice of bride. Even so, there were those who murmured that the Hand had risen above himself, that he had brought his daughter to court with this in mind. A few even cast doubt on Lady Alicent’s virtue, suggesting she had welcomed King Viserys into her bed even before Queen Aemma’s death. (These calumnies were never proved, though Mushroom repeats them in his Testimony and goes so far as to claim that reading was not the only service Lady Alicent performed for the Old King in his bedchamber.)
i know it’s just mushroom being a perv but a rumor that 15 year old alicent “serviced” jaehaerys existing besides rumors that he mistook 15 year old alicent for the daughter he last saw when she was 17 - and viserra was 15, gael 19, and daella 15, all around alicent’s age and all died before age 20. all the targaryen girls that weren’t born “for” a brother exit the narrative after some sort of sexual abuse that centers around jae, as teenagers; daenerys was born for aemon, alyssa for baelon, and maegelle for vaegon before they both fucked off and maegelle was too pious (and too old). this idea of being “for” a brother leads directly to alyssa’s death before 30:
“You were made for battles, and I was made for this. Viserys and Daemon and Aegon, that’s three. As soon as I am well, let’s make another. I want to give you twenty sons. An army of your own!” It was not to be. Alyssa Targaryen had a warrior’s heart in a woman’s body, and her strength failed her. She never fully recovered from Aegon’s birth, and died within the year at only four-and-twenty.
and alysanne being “for” jaehaerys is how he excusing sexually abusing her into a risky pregnancy. essentially what i fear is that because saera, daella, viserra, and gael aren’t “for” someone, jaehaerys gets it into his mind that that are for him. even without him raping them tho, that subtext is there! he is entitled to saera’s virginity and calls her a whore multiple times, even decades after she’s left, and murders her boyfriend in front of her. he claims a weird sexual ownership over his neurodivergent daughter daella and his alcoholic, depressed daughter viserra, and we get zero information on gael’s pregnancy or his reaction to it. but jaehaerys deciding his daughters are “for” him certainly has a basis in canon just judging from the erratic and worrying behavior of his younger daughters.
jaehaerys is a creep and i hate him and i don’t know how much of this is on purpose (like, will aegon vi or dany find out jaehaerys was a shady pedo and it shatters their world? will dunk and egg find it out and it affects their plot somehow? did george just put it in there to make a comment on power and monarchy and misogyny, similar to aegon iv raping the bracken women? or is just there for window dressing creepiness, like “i will pepper in the fact that jaehaerys is sexually obsessed with his daughters” thing?) or if george just made jaehaerys sexually obsessed with his daughters on accident?
on the one hand, it seems out of character for george. he romanticizes drogo thru dany’s eyes but it’s clear he’s meant to be seen as a creep (dany talking about being pregnant followed by “she had just turned 14” is sickeningly jarring for a reason) and also, drogo dies bc of his own pride. sansa doesn’t like any of the old dudes touching her; she is at least marginally freaked out by her wedding night, the unkiss, and lf & dontos taking liberties with her, and rightly. the story that’s told about the mountain raping a girl and making the father pay him is meant to disgust us. the walk of shame is a harrowing chapter to read, because whatever cersei’s crimes, this sexual humiliation is not something she deserves. on and on. yes, we all hate the way arya is sexualized in the mercy chapter, but crucially, she’s not blithely and happily seducing these pervs, she’s going hard candy on their asses. is this just messy set up for something like that?? i think, given how little dany knows about her family’s crimes that somehow learning jae sexually abused (and maybe even impregnated) his own daughters after she herself experiences sexual abuse would be huge. the same goes for aegon vi learning that sexual abuse runs rampant in his family tree; would he empathize with saera hiding out in essos to escape the sexual abuse of her father, see some of elia and his own plight in her? in gael?
or did george really just. not realize how sexually obsessed jaehaerys was with his daughters?
idk how to end this. where’s the winds of winter george i need answers.
#anti jaehaerys targaryen#anti fire and blood#valyrianscrolls#saera targaryen#viserra targaryen#gael targaryen#debated the vs tag bc i know it’s probably gonna annoy some people but. i do actually wonder if this will be a plot point in the books#or if it was an accident#rani attempts meta#gael and the bard#saerhaerys#jaehaerys the cruel
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Book recs: monster/creature friendships
Do you like movies like Alien vs Predator, Venom, and Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes? Do you enjoy dragon riders and talking animal companions? Friendly yet deeply inhuman aliens? Monster children and monster parents? Consider yourself less of a monster fucker and more of a monster best friend? Watch horror movies and fantasize about befriending the horrifying ghosts and ghoulies? Then this is the list for you!
A note: some of these books do have romance subplots, but not as the most important relationship or focus.
A (second) note: the criteria for "monster" are subjective. I looked mainly for titles featuring creatures who neither look nor act/think human. In cases where they are more human looking, I wanted a distinctly inhuman mind and morality, meaning most books featuring vampires, werewolves, fey, etc are excluded. I may have included books you feel aren't monstrous enough, or excluded ones you feel are sufficiently monstrous but I don't agree about. Again, it’s subjective.
Feel free to leave your own recs in the notes, but please know that if you rec books featuring mostly human vampires and werewolves I will be judging. I have separate lists for those, go look there instead.
For more details on the books, continue under the readmore. Titles marked with * are my personal favorites. If you want more book recs, check out my masterpost of rec lists!
Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir*
Ryland Grace just woke up from a coma, unable to remember anything. He finds himself alone on a space ship, and as his memories slowly trickle back, he realizes he’s been sent on a mission: to find a solution to the impending doom of the earth. Still struggling with holes in his memories, Ryland tries to fulfill his mission, but as he gets closer to his goal, he discovers someone else got there first. And they aren’t anything close to human. Funny, heartfelt, and heavy on the science.
Fragment by Warren Fahy*
The reality TV show Sealife is having a rough time - as it turns out, a ship full of scientists doesn’t make for the kind of drama they hoped for. Hoping for some excitement, they reach Hender’s Island, a fragment of a lost continent that may contain an interesting new ecosystem. But as they step foot on the island, they quickly come to realize the ecosystem isn’t just new, it’s highly dangerous and very hungry. Among all this life is one single species that may be more dangerous than any other, but which may also be the salvation of the scientists on the island. A bit wonky, but genuinely one of the most fun books I have read, I love it so much.
The Road to Roswell by Connie Willis*
Francie has just traveled to Roswell to attend her college friend’s wedding to a UFO conspiracist. Not a believer herself, Francie is shocked when she finds herself abducted by an alien. Her abductor is not much what popular media would have you believe, looking more like a tumbleweed than a grey alien, and is clearly on some kind of mission it isn’t willing to put on hold for the sake of Francie attending to her duties as a bridesmaid. As more people get roped along - among those a conman, an old lady, a ufo conspiracist, and a retiree with an RV - Francie finds herself getting closer to the alien and wanting to help it succeed.
The Last Human by Zack Jordan
Young adult. Sarya is a human - the only one of her kind. Living with her adoptive mother - a vicious, insectile alien - on a space station surrounded by hundreds of other alien species, Sarya spends every day staying below the radar and hiding her true identity. But when an odd new alien arrives on the station, she may finally get an answer to her biggest question: why humanity was deemed too dangerous to be allowed to exist.
Alien vs. Predator: Prey by Steve Perry & S.D. Perry*
On desert planet Ruyshi, businesswoman Machiko Noguchi is about to take over the leading position in a small human colony. Her job is made infinitely harder when the colony comes under attack on two fronts as two species of vicious aliens choose it as their battle ground. If you're reading this list, you probably already know of the movie by the same name. The book, while completely different in setting and cast, does feature many similar plot points, among those a third act team-up between a human woman and a murderous alien.
Children of Time by Adrian Tchaikovsky*
Millenia and generation spanning scifi. After the collapse of an empire, a planet once part of a project to uplift other species to sentience is left to develop on its own, resulting not in the intelligent monkeys once intended but in sentient giant spiders. Millenia later, what remains of humanity arrives looking for a new home, only to be met by the artificial remains of the ancient woman who once led the uplift project - and she is not willing to let them on her planet.
The Moon and the Sun by Vonda N. McIntyre
You can’t go wrong with a Vonda McIntyre novel just, like, in general. This one is set in 17th century France, where a young woman and her brother travel to live at the royal court, where they are to care for and study a strange captured sea monster fabled to have the ability to grant eternal life. A lot of focus on court politics as well as the cultural and biological differences between the humans and the mermaid. Also available as a movie (but it’s not very good, please just read the book).
Winter Tide by Ruthanna Emrys*
Lovecraftian fishpeople! Aphra and her brother are the only survivors after the government raided their home, Innsmouth. Their only living family are the amphibian people of the deep, whom they will one day join, but until then they are bound to land where they struggle to build new lives for themselves after the great loss of their home and loved ones. Then rumors start to spread of a russian agent seeking dangerous and ancient magic, forcing Aphra to involve herself as they try to stop it. Does contain horror elements but is generally a much more optimistic look on cosmic horror than most lovecraftian stories, told from the perspective of one of his monsters. Lots of focus on found family and rebuilding of community.
The Doors of Eden by Adrian Tchaikovsky*
The Doors of Eden is something of an experiment in speculative biology, featuring versions of Earth in which various different species were the one to rise to sentience, from dinosaurs to neanderthals. Now, something is threatening the existence of all timelines, dragging multiple different people and species into the struggle, among those a pair of cryptid hunting girlfriends and a transgender scientist. Together, can they find a way to save the multiverse?
The Spider and Her Demons by sydney khoo*
Young adult. All teenager Zhi wants is a normal life (and possibly for her harsh aunt to be a bit nicer), but it’s hard when she’s half spider demon. Every day she must conceal her true nature and hide in human guise. When she slips up and eats a man in front of her rich, aloof classmate Dior, Zhi thinks her life is over. But Dior has secrets of her own, and she is dead set on making herself a part of Zhi's life.
Vespertine by Margaret Rogerson
Young adult fantasy. Artemisia prefers the dead to the living, and is training to become a Gray Sister, a nun who helps the souls of the deceased pass on to the afterlife rather than remain as dangerous spirits. To defend her convent, Artemisia accepts the help of a dangerous revenant, a powerful spirit which grants her great power but also could possess her the moment her guard is lowered. As evil threatens her homeland, Artemisia and the revenant must find a way to work together.
Slewfoot: a Tale of Bewitchery by Brom
Historical horror. Young Englishwoman Abitha has only recently arrived and married into a Puritan colony when she unexpectedly becomes a widow. As she strives to save her small farm from going under in the wake of tragedy, something dark and dangerous stalks the surrounding woods. He doesn't know whether he's spirit, devil, or god, doesn't even know his own name, and in requesting Abitha's help, both their lives are changed forever.
Lycanthropy and Other Chronic Illnesses by Kristen O'Neal*
Young adult. Priya had plans to go to Stanford, but is derailed when the fallout from lyme disease puts her back, making her question if she'll ever get back to normal. Luckily she has her discord support group with whom she can chat and vent about her illness. Even more - she has Brigid, online fandom friend and fellow chronic illness sufferer. But when Brigid disappears from the web without warning, Priya must drive to Pennsylvania to make sure her friend is okay - and finds that Brigid's condition is a bit hairier than she expected.
Sorcery of Thorns by Margaret Rogerson
Young adult. Elisabeth is a librarian, trained to handle grimoires - books of magic which, if mishandled, can turn into horrifying monsters. When an act of sabotage leads to the release of one of the library's most dangerous grimoires, Elisabeth finds herself implicated in the crime. Forced to team up with an enemy sorcerer and his loyal and unpredictable demon servant, Elisabeth sets out to find out the truth of what happened.
The Girl With All the Gifts by M.R. Carey
In a post apocalyptic, zombie-infested wasteland, a group of characters try to stay alive and hope to find a cure. One of the characters is Melanie, a young girl who carries the contagion inside of her and hungers for flesh, but like many children of the apocalypse has kept her humanity. Is she and children like her the answer to the cure we are looking for? Or are they the start of something entirely new? This book has also been adapted as a movie!
Malevolent by Harlan Guthrie*
Lovecraftian horror mystery. Private detective Arthur Lester wakes up in his office, his partner dead, memories fuzzy, vision gone, and the voice of a malevolent entity in his mind. Unable to see, Arthur is forced to rely on guidance from the entity as he attempts to solve the mystery of what it is and where it came from. Is this a book? No. But as someone who reads mostly audiobooks, the difference between a book and a fiction podcast is negligible, and also I love this story and its characters and want all of you to do so too.
Parasyte by Hitoshi Iwaka*
Horror manga, heavy on the bodyhorror. Shinichi Izumi wakes one day after a strange dream: that an alien parasite crawled into his arm. Soon he realizes it was more real than dream, and that an inhuman creature, having failed to eat and take over his brain, now controls his arm. Forced to cooperate, the two do their best to survive as more parasites quietly infiltrate society, meaning to devour our entire species. Also available as a very faithful anime!
Skulduggery Pleasant by Derek Landy*
Young adult. Twelve-year-old Stephanie Edgley's uncle, famed horror writer, just died mysteriously and left her his entire fortune. As it turns out, the stories he wrote weren't entirely made up, and that which killed him wasn't entirely human. In trying to avenge his death, Stephanie joins forces with Skulduggery Pleasant, sorcerer, detective, and living, walking skeleton.
The Cloud Roads by Martha Wells
Moon doesn't know what he is. Having lost his family young he lives on the move, shifting his shape to hide his true form. The only ones similar to himself he's ever encountered are the vicious, bloodthirsty Fell, but he knows he cannot be one of them. When chance leads to a meeting with someone like him, he hopes his days of loneliness are over. But his new people stand against a dangerous enemy, and not all of them welcome Moon's help. A departure from other titles on this list in that it features only creatures, with not a single human on page.
The Girl From the Well by Rin Chupeco
Young adult horror. Okiku died three hundred years ago, her body thrown down a well. Now she spends her days hunting for and punishing murderers like the one who once killed her. When a strange boy bearing odd tattoos appears in her area, he catches Okiku's attention - as does something that follows after him. To save the boy, Okiku will be drawn into a journey taking both of them from American suburbia to a faraway shrine in Japan.
Monstrilio by Gerardo Sámano Córdova
When Magos loses her son Santiago to a longtime illness, she loses herself to grief and cuts out a piece of his lung. After hearing old folktales, she begins feeding it - and is shocked to find it growing and alive. Soon finding herself in charge of a hungry and bloodthirsty creature, Magos and her family must come together to care for what they can only see as a second chance for Santiago.
Semiosis by Sue Burke
A generational story following a group of humans trying to survive on a new planet, where a strange and unkowable intelligence is finding ways to use them to its whims. As the humans come across an abandoned city wrapped in the roots of a strange plant, they slowly come to the realization that mutual communication is the only path to peace and survival. Meanwhile, the alien finds itself tied all the more tightly to the growing human community.
The Stardust Grail by Yume Kitasei
Maya Hoshimoto used to be an art thief, and a damned good one to, until a disastrous heist made her retire into academia, hoping for peace and coping with an alien disease which causes her to see glimpses of the future. When an old friend tracks her down and asks her help to find and steal a legendary artifact that could save his entire species, Maya is convinced to do one last job.
Magical Girl Dandelion by Mizuho Kaeru
Manga. Tanpopo Ohanami's parents were killed by a phantom monster when she was young, but her life was saved by Shade, another phantom. Ever since then, Shade has been her friend, watching over her and keeping her safe. But then Tanpopo is revealed to be a potential magical girl, meant to fight the phantoms and protect humanity. Her and Shade are meant to be enemies, but can they instead work and fight alongside each other?
His Majesty's Dragon by Naomi Novik
It’s the height of the Napoleonic Wars, and soldiers on dragon back fight each other in the air. Will Laurence isn't a dragonrider but a sea captain, but when his ship captures a French frigate and discovers a dragon egg about to hatch in his cargo, his life changes forever when he and the dragon hatchling bond.
The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman
Middle grade. In Lyra's world, every person has a daemon: a talking animal companion who follows them throughout life. When children begin being stolen off the street, among them Lyra's friend, she must embark on a great journey to save him, taking her to the furthest north - and beyond.
A Redtail's Dream by Minna Sundberg*
Graphic novel inspired by Finnish mythology. When an irresponsible fox spirit accidentally traps an entire town in the dreamlands, it’s up to slacker Hannu and his talking, shapeshifting dog Ville to save everyone. Together the unwilling heroes must travel the dreamlands and locate the townsfolk, returning them to the waking world before the fox spirit sends them all on to death to hide his mistake. While the physical copy is all but impossible to get a hold of, the original webcomic can still be read for free here.
#nella talks books#project hail mary#fragment#the road to roswell#the last human#alien vs predator#children of time#the moon and the sun#winter tide#the doors of eden#the spider and her demons#vespertine#slewfoot#lycanthropy and other chronic illnesses#sorcery of thorns#the girl with all the gifts#malevolent podcast#parasyte#skulduggery pleasant#the books of the raksura#the girl from the well#montrilio#semiosis#the stardust grail#magical girl dandelion#his majesty's dragon#the golden compass#a redtails dream
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