#main criticisms are the usual suspect

[space-blue]

Omg omg Atreus tells Mimir he's his second dad? And Freya says we're her found family? It's a coming of age story + happy trouple ending?

And Kratos is revered as a god?

This is soooo good and lovely and what a blast. The writing was so excellent!

[katsu28]

"send ☕ along with a prompt from any one of the lists below and a character of your choosing, and i'll write you a one shot to satisfy your craving!"

☕: prompt 23 from list e for rafe!! 🫶🏻🫶🏻

it pains me to paint my pogues in a not so great light but i will forever love protective rafe <3 thank you for requesting!

rafe cameron x reader, minimal swearing, 1.9k

“Look who it is! The Princess Kook, slummin’ it on our side of the island for once.” 

Your grip tightened around the pack of beer you were holding at the voice coming from behind you, because you already knew who it was. There was only one person ballsy enough to speak so critically of you, and you were pretty damn sure he was standing right behind you.

Lo and behold there he was, flanked by a more bored looking John B. 

JJ Maybank was and always had been on your case, though you suspected it had more to do with your family name than with you yourself—always spouting off about money and wealth and eating the rich. You understood where he was coming from, of course, but that didn’t mean it stopped being irritating.

It just seemed like he was always riding you about being some little rich girl with daddy’s money, not an actual person, with actual feelings. But after a while, you’d grown used to it. JJ was all bark and no bite. 

“Hi, JJ.” You sighed, shifting your weight to one leg. You nodded at John B, who did the same back to you. “How’s it going?” 

“Didn’t know our booze was good enough for Her Majesty’s taste.” JJ sneered, crossing his arms over his chest. You rolled your eyes at his dig. “Rafe know you’re over here?” 

“He’s not my keeper.” 

“What’re you even doing here, Y/N? They don’t got beer on Figure Eight?” John B sounded a little bit nicer, more tired than bitchy like his blond friend. 

“Cheaper here.” 

“Like you don’t have enough fuckin’ money.” JJ scoffed. John B jabbed a sharp elbow into his side, a sign for him to shut up. 

“Look guys, I’m not looking for any trouble. I just wanna get some beer and go home, that’s it.” 

“How ‘bout you leave the beer here and run back to your little princess castle instead?” 

“You’re a real prick tonight, JJ. Something got your panties all up in a bunch?” You shouldn’t have snarked back, that you knew, but he was really getting on your nerves tonight. You weren’t sure why. His words usually just slid right off you. 

JJ’s expression darkened and he scowled, brows furrowing. “Maybe ‘cause I just got fired from the Club this morning.” 

“What, why?” You asked, surprised. It was a genuine question. JJ was a definite pain in your ass, maybe with an attitude problem but still a good employee. 

“Oh, drop the clueless act. Pretty sure it was one of your stuck up friends who complained.” 

“I’m sorry you got fired, JJ, I am, but I had nothing to do with it. And there’s nothing I can do about it either. I don’t have that kind of pull with anyone at the Club, neither does my family.” 

You figured it would be better if you left now before JJ came up with another retort, or you'd likely be here trading snippy insults with each other all night, and you had better things to do with your time. There was some sympathy in you for him, but your statement was still true. There was nothing you could do for him, even if you wanted to. And besides, Rafe was waiting on you for a movie night. 

Leaving the conversation and the beer you were supposed to get behind, you hurried back to your car. The quicker you got to Rafe’s place, the quicker you could forget about it. 

Only a couple minutes into the drive, headlights flashed in your mirror. No big deal, probably just someone heading the same way as you. You were on the main road to the other side of the island, after all. 

Then the car sped up a bit, coming dangerously close to your back bumper before retreating a sizable distance behind—once, twice. By the third time, you were starting to get a little pissed. 

“What the fuck?” You muttered, squinting to get a better look at it. A big camper van, old from what you make out in the darkness, faded orange—oh fuck. You knew that van, John B’s old clunker of a car. And if you squinted a little harder, you could almost make out the same blond head of hair that was antagonizing you back at the store. 

So JJ did have a little bite in him. You sure as hell weren’t going to stick around to find out. 

Stepping on the gas a little harder, you took the long way back to the Figure 8, weaving through the backroads you’d known like the back of your hand since before you were able to drive. Back then, you’d done it on your bike, peals of laughter echoing through the overgrown fields of the Cut turned clean lines of pristinely cut lawns the closer you got to home, as Rafe chased after you on his own. 

Still, the van followed you on your way. With every glance at it in the rearview mirror, you grew a little more worried.

JJ’s driving was erratic, like he was playing a game of cat and mouse with you. If he really wanted to hurt you, this would be the ideal place to do it. There was nothing but grass and weeds around here. Nobody would find you for hours, even days if he were to run you into a ditch or something. 

That thought alone spurred you to drive even faster, driving and driving until you took one more look in the mirror to see that the van had stopped. You watched the headlights grow smaller in the distance, forcing yourself to keep driving until you got to safety—to Rafe. 

You screeched to a stop in front of Rafe’s townhouse, barely giving a backwards glance to see if they were really gone before hurrying the rest of the way to the front door. Hands trembling, you balled them both into fists, raising one to knock as loudly as you could. You could barely hear the thud of your fist on the wood over your thundering heart. 

The door opened in an instant, Rafe’s smiling face greeting you. It quickly faded when he took in your wide eyes, your hard breathing. He pulled you inside immediately, sliding the locks home behind you before gathering you into his arms. “What happened?”

You explained as quick as you could, but the adrenaline from the whole thing was starting to die down. Your previous thoughts were starting to seem silly at this point. JJ was a hothead, but you didn't think he’d go so far as to take out his anger on you. He was probably just trying to scare you, nothing more, nothing less. 

Rafe, on the other hand, was livid. 

“Did they hurt you?” He asked, voice dangerously low. His eyes searched you for any visible injuries, hands sliding over your body with the utmost care, a stark contrast to the storm creeping into his beautiful blue eyes. “I swear to god if those punks even laid a finger on you—” 

“No, no, they didn’t hurt me, Rafe. I’m okay now, I promise. Just a little shaken up is all.” You assured him, stopping his search by lacing your fingers through his. He still looked unsure. “I’m fine, baby. Honest.” 

Rafe’s brows furrowed long and hard, and you reached up, attempting to smooth out the deep wrinkle between them with your thumb. 

You traced above one of them, trailing down over the skin under it before letting your palm settle against his cheek. His eyes fluttered shut for a split second as he leaned more into your touch. The wrinkle disappeared. 

“Okay. But you’re not going home tonight. You’re gonna stay here, with me, and I’m gonna have a talk with my sister in the morning, okay?” He was calmer now, you could tell. The sharp edge to his voice was gone, his shoulders relaxed the more you stroked along his skin. You nodded, satisfied. “Can I make you something? Tea? A snack? I’ve got those cheese puffs you’re so obsessed with, though I don’t really see how good—” 

“Rafe,” You chided, smiling warmly, “You don’t have to dote on me. I’m fine.” 

“I know. My girl’s strong.” He murmured, turning his head to press a kiss to the soft skin of your palm. “Just had me worried for a bit, that’s all.” 

You kissed him, short and sweet, before tugging him towards the living room. Your gaze landed on the snacks he’d laid out on the coffee table first, drifting to the heaps of blankets and pillows on the couch right after.

Everything was already set up perfectly, and with all that had happened in just the past hour, sent a warmth flooding through your body, a sense of safe and love and home that you only ever felt when you were with Rafe. 

Rafe suddenly looked bashful, scratching the back of his neck with an embarrassed grin at the way you were looking at him. “What? I was excited to see you.” 

“You saw me yesterday, Rafe.” You chided lightly, completely failing at a stern look in favor of something much fonder. 

“Doesn’t mean I can’t miss you.” 

“Rafe Cameron, are you going soft on me?” You hummed, settling onto the couch. Rafe threw himself down next to you with a nonchalant shrug, resting an idle hand on your knee when you threw your legs across his thighs, but the answer was a resounding yes.

Yes, he was soft for you. Yes, he loved you more than he loved anything and anyone in this world. 

He knew it, you knew it, and that was what prompted him to speak his next words. 

“Y’know, I’ve been thinking.” 

“Uh oh.” You snickered, drawing a roll of his eyes with a lopsided smile. 

“Hilarious. Anyways, um, what would—I mean, what’re your thoughts about maybe…moving in with me?” 

“Here?” Maybe you sounded a bit more skeptical than you meant to, because Rafe quickly backtracked, sitting up straight. 

“Doesn’t have to be here. We could get a new place, if you want.” He replied, shaking his head. “Top’s uncle works in real estate, I could probably get him to show us some places within the next couple of days—”

“No.” 

Rafe’s expression crumpled. “No? No, as in no, you don’t want to live together?” 

You amended your rather blunt statement with a hand placed over his. “No, as in no, I don’t want to get a new place. I wanna live here. With you.” 

“You do?” 

“Don’t look so surprised, Cameron, your place is way nicer than mine.” You teased. Clearly amused, he scoffed, giving your calf a playful pinch. 

“That the only reason?” 

“‘Course not. I’m also looking forward to that fancy shower head in your bathroom.” 

Rafe snorted, pulling you close against him, pressing his forehead against yours. He looked a bit funny like this, nearly bug-eyed because of your close proximity, but you thought he’d never looked cuter. “And me?” 

You peppered kisses to his cheeks, chin, nose, the corners of his mouth in lieu of an answer, loud and over dramatic and definitely obnoxious, but it made him laugh. Then you kissed him right where he wanted, firm and loving against his lips to say yes, always you, and he smiled. 

Moving in with Rafe meant getting to hear your favorite laugh, see your favorite smile, every single day waking up next to him. You hoped you’d get to experience it for the rest of your life, starting now. 

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[coddda]

Hiiiiiii. Episode 25/26 lawlight analysis rant thingy here. I don't know how to write an intro for this so let's just get to it LOL

I think one of the reasons that the rain/foot scenes stick out so much (the. Sheer insanity of a Foot Massage Scene in an anime revolving around two guys trying to kill each other aside 💀) is the fact that the anime specifically suffers a bit in terms of adapting a few of the "emotional" moments in death note.

And I don't mean "emotionally impactful" exactly. For example I think the adaptations of scenes like Raye and Naomi's deaths were very impactful and the atmospheres of their final scenes were great, but I mean more from a characterization standpoint (if that makes sense). Being more focused on mind and logic games, Death Note as a whole isn't as invested in individual characters' deeper feelings as it is in its action (which isn't necessarily a criticism per say, it's simply part of the nature of a mystery thriller series). But just because they're fewer and farther between doesn't mean there are none at all. In the manga we do get to see, for example, how much Light actually cared for his family and especially Sayu, and how he actually felt more conflicted and suffered lack of sleep/appetite when he first used the Death Note.

The anime specifically as an adaptation is pretty good at adapting the main mind fuckery and action of Death Note, but its lacking in properly adapting scenes like the ones I mentioned above is a criticism I see somewhat often, and it's pretty fair imo. Compared to all the other adaptations, it certainly seems to fall short on an emotional level: the musical has entire songs going in depth about the characters feelings and relationships, the 2015 jdrama is. Insane and has its emotional moments in spades (because it's a TV drama, which are more focused on portraying emotional conflict and the like), even the 2006 movies has its emotional beats and L Change the WorLd is. Well. Oh Man.

Anime Light to a lot of people is like. Light but he's "already evil" (which I have my own thoughts on but I digress). Light but after using the Death Note for like 2 minutes he's already like "fuck yeah time to kill criminals". Basically the anime doesn't take as much time to delve into his less cynical sides or really delve into his already vague and harder to decipher feelings in general, he is noticeably colder from the get-go here, etc.

But that's part of why I think episode 25 manages to stand out so much tonally (apart from it being, y'know, the episode L literally Dies). I love the episode so much and could probably rant for hours about how much I love the artistic choices made in it but what I'm trying to get at here is that it's one of the very few moments where the show tries to go deeper into specific character's emotions, and one of the very few moments where the show Attempts (emphasis on "attempts" because, well, you'll see in a bit) to get more in-depth into Light's feelings apart from his cynicism/apathy/justice. ness.

L in these two scenes in episode 25 is, well, pretty damn open about how he feels. It's usually interpreted as him knowing that he's going to die, and you can see it. He visibly looks/sounds lost, somber, etc. He never really had much to hide around Light to begin with (since he doesn't really care about hiding himself the same way Light does) but especially not now and it Shows, and I personally thought it was pretty cool to delve into his thoughts/show how he feels this way. The somberness can be felt throughout the entire scene, even people who don't already know the plot of Death Note from the manga could probably tell that he's about to die.

In the manga, once L starts suspecting Misa again and Rem realizes what Light is trying to do, it goes straight to Watari and L's deaths, but the anime instead gives a distinct and unexpected pause in the middle of this where L contemplates his own death. It's fucking great, and the shift from straight action to slower emotional weight makes these scenes stand out a lot, since, like I said, the show usually focuses more on the former. But it's kind of ironic, too.

Not only does the anime open up L's feelings more in these scenes, but it also tries to dig deeper into Light's feelings as well through L. And it's really funny honestly because while, yes, these are the more "emotionally open" scenes of the anime Light still manages to be Incredibly avoidant and contribute almost nothing to the entire ordeal.

L is visibly upset -> "Yeah Ryuzaki, you're not making any sense at all" (Not addressing the obvious conflict from L)

"Tell me, Light. From the moment you were born, has there ever been a point where you've actually told the truth?" -> "[The most stale, over-explained, avoidant answer to a "yes/no" question that you could ever hear + blatant attempts to reframe the question]"

(L's half-smile here kills me) "I had a feeling you'd say something like that" -> [Nothing]

"I'm sorry" -> [Nothing]

"It'll be lonely won't it? You and I will be parting ways soon" -> [Nothing]

^ From this point Light continues to say literally Nothing for the rest of the scene. I'm not even joking, from then on the rest of Light's voicelines are reduced to nothing but vague noises of confusion.

Everytime L calls Light out as a person ("Has there ever been a point where you've actually told the truth?" / "I had a feeling you'd say something like that." / "Won't it be lonely?") he doesn't actually acknowledge anything. Out of those three lines, he only answers verbally to if he's ever told the truth, and even then it's the most blatantly people-pleasing answer ever, as it usually is with Light. And I don't think it's because Light just. Doesn't care about any of what L's saying at all, or that he doesn't know what the hell he's talking about (questioning Light's authenticity as a person, saying it would be lonely when they part), instead he's choosing not to acknowledge any of what this means about himself or him and L at all. He's like a fucking wall.

And like, for the truth question in particular, the show makes sure that you know it's not something that Light just. Doesn't care enough about to answer. The hard cuts to silence are a very rare but extremely effective way that the show conveys an extremely important moment (see: Light regaining his memories, Matsuda noticing Light opening the warehouse door before he escapes (not as much of a "direct" cut to silence but still)), and cuts to multiple angles/framings/zooms of the exact same shot are also used for the same purpose (see: Light hugging Misa when she was crying, Matsuda aiming his gun to shoot Light, Light regaining his memories Again). Just like the scene where Light gets his memories back, the moment L's question finishes the show utilizes both. That question cut Deep. There's is a solid Almost 5 seconds of silence before the sound of the rain gradually starts fading back in, and honestly that should be telling enough as is (but of course Light doesn't actually admit that. Or anything at all really, so). Oh also another fun detail! We do not see Light's face At All (except for the shot where you can see his mouth moving but not his eyes), for the Entire time that he's going on his spiel to L. We Will Be Revisiting This Later, by the way. This is not, in fact, the first time you're going to see this detail from Light.

The only sort of reciprocation that we see from Light during Any of these two scenes is when Light dries L's hair while L dries his feet. Biblical meanings/references aside it's interesting because it's the only time he directly does anything "for" L in these scenes, but even then he doesn't try to pass it off as anything meaningful really the same way L does ("You're still soaked", a purely neutral and factual statement. It doesn't Add Anything compared to L's. Sin atonement loneliness grieving stuff. While Light is showing his own reciprocation to this more personal moment he also tries to keep it impersonal enough that it doesn't actually have to mean anything deep). And when L says "I'm sorry" after he once again gets no response from Light. It's also after this that L gets that pained look on his face, like he knows that at this point he's not actually going to get anything meaningful from Light (again, very significant and rare from L in the show. We've seen him in distress (see: when Ukita died, hell, when Watari dies), but even then he mostly manages to keep his usually neutral expression), we never see him "look sad" like he does here):

I just think it's interesting that this is one of the few scenes in this particular adaptation of Death Note where they try to open up the character's thoughts/feeling (especially considering the fact that they. lowkey blunder in adaptations of original scenes from the manga), and L himself is being rather open (not that he ever really tries to hide what he thinks nearly as much as Light), and yet all Light contributes to it in return is like. Actually nothing. Bro fumbled it. There is no resolution to any of this, to any of what L asks at all, to any of the many opportunities for a meaningful conversation, and the only thing even relatively close to an answer that you can get from Light is what you can infer from how he acts in the episode after L dies, where he's just going through the motions, but hardly acting as if he's actually living at all.

(Honestly I think the transition from this scene with the taskforce to the subsequent scene with Misa says enough on its own. Light's expressions and tone says everything:)

(Oh sidenote but. This shit again:

"Light, this is our first date in forever. can't you enjoy yourself a little more?" ('Why don't you seem happy? We can finally be together since L is dead') -> No response, Light instead changing the topic to him wanting to move in with Misa without changing his mannerisms at all

Also there's that one detail again. You pretty much don't see Light's expression when he speaks here at all, except for one shot of his eyes, which is quite literally the exact same shot they used when he "saw" L, just altered for the new setting. You have No idea what he looks like when he's responding to Misa, although it's probably fair to assume that it's the same empty stare he has for the whole Two Shots where you can clearly see his whole expression in the entire scene.

Something something Light Yagami bad at feelings I think you get the point though)

I guess Light's Kind of showing what he's feeling now? He'll admit to himself that it's boring without L, but no more than that. Light never actually admits to anything "significant", and L's dead already anyway, so what would that even do?

And then we get, uh. Basically nothing from Light. For the next 5 Years. Except that he joined the NPA, so, uh, yay? Good job, Light you totally nailed it! Thank you for allowing us as an audience to delve deeper into your inner thoughts and feelings as a character so we can find out more about you as a person! Very helpful! Thank you for not sabotaging one of your few dedicated opportunities to look into yourself as a person and reflect on your relationships with others and being 100% honest with yourself! We stay winning guys.

Anyway, this got way too long for a scene that's over a decade old, and I've probably just said everything that everyone else has already said in this fandom before. But unfortunately this has been living in my head for way too long and I must scream. I just think this episode's neat is all :)

tl;dr Part of the reason why the rain/foot scene (tbh episode 25 in General) stands out so much is because the Death Note anime specifically was a bit robbed in terms of its more emotional character moments compared to the other medias, which makes more somber/introspective scenes like the ones in episode 25 stand out a Lot in comparison. But it's also incredibly ironic because it's one of the few moments where the show (or specifically L) tries to look deeper into Light's character, but because he is so avoidant for the entire duration of these two scenes he adds basically nothing at all. It's almost funny. Mostly sad. It's also very gay. Aand post

Okay actually nevermind one more thing I talked about how the jdrama is supposed to be more emotionally in-depth because it is a TV Drama and just for the record, same thing happens there! I could probably do an entire analysis of the Blue Scene in this context like I did with episode 25 but I'd literally be here forever, so uh, just take this iconic line as my main example:

Same Thing. L's statement "I wish we could have met some other way" is personal. It's his own wish, his own regret that he is expressing to Light. While Light's reply obviously has that same regret implied it's also phrased in a specifically impersonal way. It's closed off. "This is the only way we could have met" it closes off the topic and simply renders L's wish as ultimately futile. Light does not say that he Also wishes he could have met L a different way even if it was likely impossible, instead it's a cold statement of cynical fact.

Idk just. Something something L being able and Willing to be more openly sentimental/emotionally open towards Light/about Light vs. Light's inability to be honest with anyone including himself and his own nature preventing any form of meaningful reciprocation. Something something self-sabotage, y'know the drill. God don't even get me Started on how sincere L's tone is when he says "It'll be lonely won't it?"(at least in the eng dub) in the anime I could talk about his tone in that scene for ages. Also yes all of this relates to L Change the WorLd too by the way. Don't ask how it just does okay.

I do think that scenes like these (rain/foot scene, The Blue Scene. Uh. L Change the WorLd The Novel Adaptation) show, at least in those adaptations, that L does genuinely care for Light, and show that he values him as a friend not just in the mindgame-equal sense but also just like, a more sincere sense you know. Idk if that made any sense and that's a whole other topic for another day but you guys just have to believe me on this one alright please please believe me buries head in hands. Okay post over finally thanks for coming to my tedtalk hope you enjoyed my very-unnecessarily long analysis of the week

[rookinthecrownest]

Discussion about romances + expectations under the cut (I'd put it as like..mildly critical, but also coming from a place of understanding?). As usual, will tag as such so you don't have to engage/read on if you don't wish to. I always invite open discussion, just keep it respectful (as I will endeavour to do so myself).

This is going to be a bit of a ramble, so I apologize if my thoughts are not clearly laid out like they should be.

I think I've found the reason why I (and maybe others), feel that the romances in Veilguard feel a bit... idk, hollow, at times (not BAD!!! just feeling like there could be MORE). And that's because of the trap of expectations. I may also be speaking completely for myself here.

Anyway, let's rewind to 2014.

Be me, 10 years ago. You're not really a gamer, but indulge in action RPG's casually.

See a commercial for this hot new game coming out called Dragon Age: Inquisition. Be intrigued by the character designs, but know nothing about the world. Come to find out it's part of a trilogy. So naturally, you buy the first two games and play through them before playing the third.

Be amazed, and completely hooked on the characters, the lore, the world, the darker elements and themes. It becomes your favourite game series of all time.

But you had no idea that you could romance any of the companions going into the experience. And man, does it fundamentally rewire your brain chemistry to fall in love with cRPG and get ridiculously attached to your Warden/Hawke/Inquisitor.

So, you romance Alistair first because he's funny as hell, and has a really interesting story/character arc. Then you romance Zevran, and love that too - he's charming and suave and awkward and funny. Then you go onto DA2 and romance Fenris and Anders, and each of those romances pack their own emotional gut punches. Then it's finally time for DAI, and predictably, you go for Solas (a veritable slow burn that spans TWO games), Cullen, and partially (I never finished those playthroughs lol) Blackwall and Dorian.

I had no idea you could romance companions going into these games. It was a pleasant surprise! It always felt like an important part of the story, while not overshadowing the main plot. There was enough material in the codexes, the cutscenes, and party banter to make each romance feel complete and whole and awesome and nuanced.

And then, like some of you I suspect, I read an article that touted Veilguard as "The Most Romantic Bioware Game Yet", and I thought - "Wow, if they're saying this then the romances must be something else", given the quality of the previous romances you've experienced in these games!

But you get to the game - and while you're having fun, it definitely leans more into the ARPG style where romances feel a bit more pushed to the side in order to tell a certain story than the traditional Bioware/Larian RPG experience you've come to love.

Which is fine! Again, once I stopped thinking of Veilguard as a classic Bioware CRPG, and more like GOW/The Witcher, I found I was able to appreciate it a lot more for what it is. Things have to Happen A Certain Way for the narrative to work, and that's not a bad thing. DA2 was similar - it was a harrowing, personal tragedy about the Hawke family and their struggle to survive in Kirkwall.

Just like DA2, there are aspects of Veilguard that make me glad things happened the way they did. I'm not mad that Rook has so much dialogue without a ton of player input and you can't 'be evil' - because the game doesn't make sense if you can. At its core, Veilguard's narrative is centered around Regret, after all - you can't have an evil protagonist running around because Solas' Regret prison would never work (evil people don't generally tend to regret their actions...)!

Now, if you're expecting a long-winded, fully researched academic breakdown of every romance I'm sorry but that ain't happening tonight lol. This is not based in any fact, this is all opinion.

I can't quite put my finger on it, but sometimes it feels like the romances in this game (and I say this with the biggest grain of salt as I've only done Emmrich and Lucanis' - and am going through Neve's now), are just missing....something, to take them from good to great.

I loved Emmrich's romance. I thought it was very well done. I think a lot of people would agree it's one of the stronger ones in the game - doubly so if you play as a Mourn Watch Rook (you get a TON of MW specific lines going this route, it's great). His side romance with Strife if you don't get together is very cute, I enjoyed it. But as superbly well done as it was, somehow, I wouldn't even put it in my top 4 Bioware romances.

With Lucanis' romance - whatever my hangups may be about how it was handled, certain parts of his romance were done excellently (even better than some of the previous Bioware romances, I'd say). You can read more about my thoughts on his romance here which is why I'm not going into detail about it. Unlike Emmrich's, I would put it in my top 4 because I fell in love with the character that much (both in the game but really, I've loved him since Tevinter Nights), and I've grown very attached to my first Rook and him as a pairing. I've seen others share a similar sentiment on here (and I hate to say it but I agree) - sometimes it feels like I fell in love with Rookanis despite the way it was handled, not because of it. I can't say that for many other romances. While it's been fun to think up a lot of HC/write fics/make art about those abandoned concept sketches and parts where I felt the game could have showed us more of their dynamic, I can't help but feel like his (and other) romances would have immensely benefited from even 1 or 2 extra small scenes to flesh it out a bit more if they weren't going to let us freely talk to our companions.

The issue with the romances might also have something to do with the pacing of the game itself. I think Act 2 is where the pacing goes a bit awry, before picking back up in Act 3 (which is great, I love it).

Sometimes I also felt that there was a little too much reliance on codex entries and party banter to tell the story of the romance rather than showing it explicitly through cutscenes. I think that's what makes the romances feel a bit truncated at times, compared to the previous entries? Some of the romance-specific party banter was so good, it probably deserved its own cutscene. But it's also highly dependent on the party you have, and it's easy to miss/not trigger. I remember absolutely living for the cutscenes in the first three entries and I can't explain why I feel like, subjectively speaking, Veilguard just has less romance content (this may not be objective reality - I haven't compared the amount of romance specific content head to head with other games).

I also couldn't tell you why I feel DA2 doesn't suffer the same problems as DATV in terms of romance interaction - because you can't freely talk to your companions in that game either. Yet somehow, it always felt like I was getting enough of them to not notice that. I do miss being able to chat my LI's ear off and ask them questions about their life/their views/etc. like I could in DAO and DAI. I think it's a shame we can't because the companions in DATV are SO interesting. I want to ask them all a billion questions about their lives/stories/etc even if they're not my love interest. The party banter in this game is immaculate but being able to talk to them individually about this stuff would've been SO nice. I feel that I've missed out on SO MUCH of these characters just because I didn't have two of them in my party at the same time!

Anyway, I need to wrap this up.

In closing, perhaps, if I hadn't read that article about how it was going to be Bioware's most romantic game ... maybe I wouldn't feel this way? I think it sent my expectations through the stratosphere, and that's no one's fault but my own. Not Bioware, not EA, mine.

I know that this game's development cycle was a unique sort of hell that the other games didn't suffer. To go from Joplin -> Morrison -> Veilguard. To have so many of the original staff leave the team when Joplin got scrapped. To have to pivot from Live Service and then back to single person RPG. More lay-offs. It's a miracle this game got made. I'm happy I can sit around thinking about it. And I hope its successful enough that we get DA5 so we can all sit around dissecting that in 5-10 yrs time.

Don't get me wrong - I enjoy the Veilguard romances for what they are. I'm enjoying them more I play and discover additional banter/codex/etc that I missed the first time around. Like any Bioware romance, there are spots where they hit their stride, and spots where they falter a bit. When they hit their stride they knock it out of the fucking park. But when they falter, you can really feel it. Romance is hard to write! And you'll never fully please everyone.

But a small part of me wishes I'd gone in blind, and checked my own expectations a bit.

Maybe you agree, maybe you don't. Tell me about it. What was your experience with the romances? Did you also read that article and get your expectations up?

I hope this makes sense.

Kind regards good fandom folks,

Keep the discussion respectful. And please don't use this post as an excuse to just blatantly hate on the game.

-Rookie

[tcfactory]

So, I have a really silly Mobei-jun transmigrator idea.

OG Mobei gets into writing after his Qinghua dies and Bingge starts doing the endless harem collecting because he wants to get away from what is kinda turning into his personal hell and he doesn't even have a trusty retainer he can bully to let off some steam.

He doesn't plan on getting any of it published because he starts out really clumsy with his words at first and even he knows it. But after getting all his venting out in his early works he really just nails the kind of stories with AU fix-it vibes (even if he always very carefully writes different settings than their own world. Can't have Bingge think he is criticizing what the Junshang has done to the world) that a lot of people in PIDW crave as a form of escapism, actually. And it's a little bit fun to sneak around and get the publishing contract and the illustrations and everything done behind Bingge's back.

The harem is hooked. There are passionate fanclubs for his characters that change the friendships and alliances between the consorts. There are ship wars that escalate to actual murder attempts. Mobei-jun watches with growing dread as the women ignore Luo Binghe in favor of trying to find out who the mysterious author writing the books is. Nobody suspects him because in person he still doesn't talk, like, at all.

Except finally Bingge has enough and uses a relic to track down the mysterious author and ends up killing Mobei, because centuries of loyal service or not, he has stirred up the harem so bad that Bingge refuses to tolerate the distraction anymore. Mobei dies thinking that if it was to end like this anyway he really should have just written that wish-fulfillment fix-it story he always wanted.

So the former Mobei-jun transmigrates into Mo Yunbao, soon to be An Ding's head disciple, a little before Binghe comes to the sect. He doesn't have a digital System (at least at the start), he has an analogue interface: the System directly communicates with these strangely folded paper 'birds'.

It takes Mobei some time to realize that other people can technically see the papers the System sends, but only if he deliberately brings attention to them, they can't read any of the writing and then they forget about them right away. He eats a lot of paper trying to hide them before he realizes that he doesn't have to bother.

Since his complaint was essentially that "nobody was actually happy in PIDW, not even the protagonist" his task is simple: create the maximum number of happy endings without completely sidestepping the main storyline re: Binghe, abyss, the usual System restrictions. How hard could it be, right? He thinks he has a fair idea about all of these people, Luo Binghe just could not shut up about all his horrible childhood when he had a captive audience and Mobei has always been very good at listening.

Except Shang Qinghua is acting strange. Mobei dismisses it as maybe the peak lord being different with his disciples than he is with his king, even if there are other things that are not quite aligning as they should. He already knows how he's going to fix that storyline, he needs to focus on figuring out all the other things, so he just ignores Shang Qinghua.

Yeah, that goes exactly as well as you'd think. Imagine Airplane bro for a moment: he's trying to send his weird little (he's cute, like a feral kitten is cute) gremlin of a head disciple to harass Shen Qingqiu into turning in the bi-monthly financial report early so he can sneak out and report to his king, when the distracted A-Bao reminds him not to forget his fur coat this time. It's the middle of the summer! Even more shockingly a very neatly folded paper plane flies in out of nowhere and hits head disciple Mo on the head with a thwack before it falls on the peak lord's desk.

Qinghua surprises both of them by picking the paper plane up before the other can even reach for it. It's a warning for OOC violation, but no point deduction because there are only transmigrators in the room.

So both Mobei and Airplane tell their stories, they bond over their love of writing and how fucked it would be if everything someone wrote became someone else's reality (Mobei hopes that hasn't happened to any of his stories. He wrote some really dark stuff at the start of his writing career that he would never wish even on his worst enemy), somewhere along the way they bully the System into upgrading Mobei's interface to the digital one and they become allies in fixing the world one doomed relationship at a time.

It's not long into their cooperation when Mobei realizes that he really likes this version of Shang Qinghua, actually, but it would be really inappropriate for a head disciple to hook up with his shizun, so he settles for setting the other Mobei-jun up with Airplane. Airplane is a good, responsible creator deity, he deserves a happy end.

Besides, Mobei has a good life here, as a human. He has friends he can (affectionately) bully, he doesn't have to fear certain death (for a while at least), he teams up with Liu Mingyan and together they convince Shen Qingqiu to preside over a cross-peak literature and creative writing club that's an absolute blast and Liu Qingge is trying to poach him for Bai Zhan because the body of Mo Yunbao is really suited for physical cultivation. He would go too if it wasn't so much more convenient to stay on An Ding for the sake of their schemes, but maybe he can let the War God steal him away for some night-hunting dates every now and then.

They don't know yet what to do with Luo Binghe when he inevitably shows up at the sect, but he has some faith that between Airplane and him they can figure out something good.

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

Hi RTA! I was thinking about somthing the other day, pertaining MM and Harry and all the lies they tell. I thought, since you are the rumour expert, you might tell me if I am way off the mark here.

I think the only reason MM and H have been able to go on this long with the attacks agaiinst W&C, the BRF and the British public for that matter, is that whole "never explain" thing the royals have. I mean, we can go and look at the evidence we may collect, hearsay, what we remember or what we think, and we can come up with our own conclussions, drop them here and talk ad nauseam about how horrible something is (usually somethig Just Harry and the desterate wife of Mntecito do). Still.. is just guessing, most of the time. Because even if we have evidence of certain things, many of those, and many of the importnat ones, are still in a cloud of "truth or not". And that happens because the other party involved -W&C/BRF- do not tell us. Sure, they send a ballon to a newspaper with an ally journo, let someone know that someone close heard something, and so on..but there is no actual answers.

Take Spare(me) for example. Bitchy Harry whined and whined and whined for 200+ pages about everything and everyone. Sure, some people came out and gave their versions. But how about all the crap he said about William? About his father?

One of the main targets for MM´s venomous crap has been Catherine. How about her side?

I know this may not make any sense, but I feel as if, as long as the BRF is quiet (I trully believe in the silent treatment, grey stoning and the long game) MM and H will keep hurting our inteligences with more and more crap, and no matter how much we royal followers analyse and discover and defend, I don´t think there is an end in sight for the Sussex lies as long as the most affected ones (besides my brain cells) have to remain silenced. And how much are MM and H counting on that mandatory stoic silence to keep annoying and attacking and being gigantic pains in the brain for everyone?

Sorry for the morning rant. Something I posted on another blog led to this rabbit hole.

Old ask from July 8th

We’re thinking the same thing. The BRF’s “never explain, never complain” is why the Sussexes have been so effective with their attacks…and also why the Sussexes’ attacks increasingly have no more punch.

On the one hand, “never explain, never complain” means that the Sussexes get to control the narrative and be victims of the big bad BRF. As we’ve seen, it’s been somewhat effective.

But on the other hand, “never explain, never complain” means the BRF doesn’t react to provocation in the media. Which means that for the Sussexes to get the BRF to react and respond to them, they have to keep escalating their attacks and when they escalate their attacks, they also change the story of what happened. And when they change the story, they end up showing their hand that it’s all smoke and they don’t actually have real issues or real criticism, that they’re just doing all this for attention - the Sussexes end up undermining themselves. And as we’ve also seen, this has been very effective.

But the problem is that Charles keeps sneaking around “never explain never complain” with trial balloons designed to gauge public support for bringing the Sussexes (or at least Harry) back into the fold, which helps the Sussexes portray themselves as winning.

As for the BRF’s side, history will tell their versions. William, Kate, and Charles will have biographies written for them by reputable, authorized, credentialed, and respected authors. It’ll take time. It’ll take a lot of time, time that a lot of us probably don’t have and may never see happen. Once those biographies and retrospectives come out, the narratives will reset and the Sussexes will become but a footnote.

Of course the challenge there is whether the narratives will be the Sussexes’ version or if it’ll be the actual, recorded history version. I suspect it will be the latter, as more people go on the record as time passes to fix the messes Harry and Meghan made, particularly if there’s a divorce and if Charles wants to rehabilitate Harry’s reputation to bring him back into the family (note: small f-family, which is the private/personal side of monarchy, not big F-Family, which is the official public working side of monarchy).

Because after all, time heals most wounds. And if time doesn’t fix these wounds, history will, because history is written by the victor and the crown always wins.

[illuminatedjoy]

I don't think any Danganronpa opinion sends me into an immediate frothing rage quite like 'Sonia should have died in chapter 3 of Goodbye Despair instead of Hiyoko.' I feel like it's a critical misunderstanding of what the weaknesses of Danganronpa's writing are or how to improve them.

Anyway, long post incoming. I'm going to talk about the three main points I see people trying to make when they say this.

Hiyoko's Arc is Interrupted

This is the main thing I feel like people dislike about Hiyoko dying and Sonia surviving. Sonia doesn't change much over the course of the story, and Hiyoko does. Shouldn't Hiyoko be rewarded for growing as a person by having the chance to survive?

Potentially, yes, but not absolutely. A character with a meaningful arc doesn't necessarily need to survive, but the impact of their arc needs to be felt. And Hiyoko's isn't. A critical failure of the third case is that it sweeps Hiyoko's death under the rug and focuses mostly on Ibuki's death. If Hiyoko's death were given more emotional weight, her severed character arc would have much more meaning.

This connects to a broader problem in Danganronpa. I feel like repeating the 'two victims' trope from the first game was a massive mistake, because it cemented the idea that third cases should have two victims always. One of the most unique aspects of Danganronpa is the emotional impact of each individual death. But too often, third cases leave at least one character's death feeling pointless. This problem goes beyond the canon games and has infected fangans. Personally, for example, I feel like both of the Danganronpa Another games would have been considerably improved by allowing one of the characters that died in chapter 3 to survive. I don't want to get too bogged down in this, but I just want to highlight how it affects Hiyoko.

Hiyoko's death has nothing to do with Mikan's broader plan, and so it gets swept under the rug. Hiyoko is barely mourned by the cast, and none of the characters that survive chapter 3 have a strong connection to her. THAT'S why her death sucks.

How could this be improved? Sticking as close to the original story as possible, make Hiyoko's death part of Mikan's plan. Have her deliberately plan to kill Hiyoko when she comes to the bar, and use the death to obfuscate the rest of the case. Have Mikan rant about Hiyoko's bullying during her breakdown. Show Fuyuhiko and/or Sonia (because she did want to help Hiyoko) mourn Hiyoko more in the following chapter. Make Hiyoko's death HURT.

Stretching further away from the original story, a favorite idea of mine is that Ibuki is the one that recovers her memories of despair, though she continues to pretend to be affected by the Gullible disease. Ibuki hunts down and slaughters Hiyoko, and frames Mikan for the crime. Now a major part of the trial is everyone suspecting Mikan because of Hiyoko's bullying, and Mikan having to become a more confident person in order to stand up to them. This change also gives Ibuki a much stronger role in the story, since her Ultimate Despair persona would be such a shocking contrast with who she usually is. Hiyoko still dies, but her death is the main focus of the chapter, and Mikan has the chance for a strong survivor arc.

Sonia is a Weak Character

...So, your solution for improving her is... kill her arbitrarily in Chapter 3. Yeah, I'm sure that would help her characterization.

I think Sonia is a much stronger character than people give her credit for, but she is criminally underused by the writing and it's clear she didn't leave the same impression on everyone. She's intelligent, she's resilient in the face of grief, she's helpful in multiple situations over the course of the story, and she's, IMO, the funniest survivor. But the story doesn't give her time to grieve after Gundham's death because it's chapter 5 and we need to focus on Nagito being Nagito. Because of this, she bounces back so quickly people feel like she didn't care at all. Just give her a CG or a quiet scene alone or something. Come on.

While everyone is focused on Nagito, she's the only one actually trying to solve any problems. She tries to blast her way into the ruins and at least partially sees through Nagito's trap. Emphasize this a bit more and contrast her determination with her pain. The elements of a strong character arc are already present, they just aren't given much spotlight.

They could have also done more with her during the final trial. Since Sonia's actions as a remnant of despair likely had more impact than most of the others, show us a devastated Novoselic. Let her react to the extent of her horrible actions.

If Sonia Died, Kazuichi Could Have Had a Character Arc

Sonia should not have to die for Kazuichi to have a character arc.

Sonia should not have to die for Kazuichi to have a character arc.

Sonia Nevermind should not have to fucking die for Kazuichi Souda to have a character arc.

Yeah, this one pisses me off. So, the argument is that Kazuichi would have had to get over his simping for Sonia if she died. But here's the thing- HE CAN DO THAT WHILE SHE'S ALIVE. Kazuichi's attraction to Sonia is very surface-level. He likes hot blondes. That's it. If Sonia dies, he has to move on, but he doesn't have to change as a person. At all. He doesn't have to recognize that he's been a creep. He doesn't have to commit to treating women better in the future. He doesn't have to develop a deeper appreciation of who Sonia was as a person.

If Sonia is still alive, he has a much greater opportunity to do all of these things. He has to display real strength of character and growth to move on. If the writing cared about giving him a good arc, they could have done so without changing the death order at all. Imagine, for example, that he tries to hit on Sonia while she's still grieving Gundham. Imagine Sonia (finally) flies off the handle and tells him off for how he's been acting about her this entire time. Imagine Kazuichi finally, finally starts to see that he's been a major creep, that Sonia isn't attracted to him, and if he ever wants that to change, he has to change as a person. He has to let go. There you go, there's a goddamn character arc.

When people say that Sonia's death would have given Kazuichi the arc he needed, what I hear is 'I find Kazuichi's grief over a superficial crush who didn't even like him more meaningful than Sonia's grief for someone she genuinely cared for and who cared for her in return.' What even... am I supposed to say to that. It's fucking wild.

All three of these characters, Sonia, Hiyoko, and Kazuichi deserved better from the game's writing. Swapping Hiyoko and Sonia is not how you make that happen.

[pink-sparkly-witch]

The One That Got Away - Chapter Fifteen

Warnings: angst, injuries, fluff, flirting.

Words: 1.7k

Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x Female Reader

A/N: I didn’t have a beta for this, so all mistakes are mine.

You can catch up here!

 My Masterlist AO3    Ko-Fi

“Try to get some rest,” Y/N smiled at her patient and exited the room, heading back to the main desk to see who was next on the list. In two sweet hours, she’d finish her shift and finally get some proper time off.

Jess’ premature departure meant she and all of the nurses on her staff had banded together to cover more shifts than usual as they waited for a temporary replacement to start. It had been exhausting, and Y/N was surprised at how quickly she’d fallen out of the habit of pulling a seventy hour week, but it was finally over. The new nurse had started yesterday, and normal shift service had resumed for her and her team.

There was another reason for her excitement: her date with Dean was in fourteen hours. Not that she was counting. Y/N had been disappointed they had to postpone their date last week, even more disappointed they couldn’t fit it in last week. However, these things happened, and Dean had been right; absence made the heart grow fonder. Not that she’d tell him that. He didn’t need the extra ego boost.

“Y/N”, Dr Ellen Harvelle said as she arrived at the check-in desk, ready to take another patient. “Got an emergency four minutes out. Someone from Firehouse 3 has been injured on a job. Normally I wouldn’t ask, but everyone else is tied up.”

“I’m on it, Dr H,” Y/N replied, trying to push down the dread rising from her stomach. Throwing herself into action, she gowned up and ran to the ambulance bay. Please don’t be Dean or Bobby. Please don’t be Dean or Bobby. Was all that was running through the nurse’s head as she swallowed the bile rising in her throat.

Sirens blaring and lights flashing, the ambulance screeched to a stop in front of them, immediately followed by the firetruck. Her heart pounded painfully in her chest, but the second Dean and Bobby jumped from the engine, Y/N exhaled deeply and relaxed.

“You good?” Ellen asked, and she nodded and jumped into action.

“What have we got?” Y/N asked, stepping up to the ambulance and waiting for the paramedic’s assessment.

“Castiel Novak, thirty-five, trapped by a falling beam from the ceiling of a burning building. He was found unconscious, breathing apparatus dislodged. Suspect the collapse of both lungs and damage to the airways from smoke inhalation. Compressions have been ongoing since he crashed about thirty seconds ago,” Jack spoke as he and Jo got the gurney out of the ambulance.

“Alright, Y/N, we’re gonna need to do a ride-along,” Ellen said.

“What can we do?” Bobby asked calmly, though his widened eyes showed his concern.

“We need to keep compressions going. Jack, do everything Y/N tells you. Guys,” she directed to the firefighters surrounding her, “on my say, help me move him to trauma bay three. Y/N? Whenever you’re ready.”

Y/N climbed on the gurney and straddled Castiel’s thighs. “Alright, Jack. On the count of three, pull away, and I’ll take over, okay?” she waited until Jack met her gaze and nodded his understanding before placing one hand on top of the other and clasping her fingers together.

“One, two, three!” Seamlessly, Jack pulled his hands away, and Y/N replaced them with her own, not missing a beat as she began pumping Castiel’s chest firmly.

“Let’s move!” Ellen ordered, and Dean and Benny stepped forward and pushed Castiel and Y/N into the hospital.

Having suffered a collapse of both lungs, a concussion, and damage to his respiratory system from smoke inhalation, Castiel was in a serious but stable condition. He was responding well to treatment, but the next twenty-four hours would be critical, and Y/N knew there would be a vigil of firefighters in the waiting room until he was out of the woods.

With her shift just about over, Y/N checked on Cas one last time and updated his chart before handing his care over to Kevin. She wanted to stay on and work a double, but when she spoke to Rowena about it, the red-head told her that she’d reached her quota of hours for the week and reminded her she’d already pulled two doubles this week and to go home before she fell down and she was the one lying in a hospital bed.

Closing her locker, Y/N threw her purse over her shoulder and let her hair loose from the uncomfortably tight and itchy bun it had been constricted for the past fifteen hours.

Making her way to the waiting room to give the firehouse her final update, she smiled slightly, seeing all the firefighters were no longer in their turnout gear. Jackets and helmets were no longer strewn all over the tables, chairs and floor. Y/N remembered from Pamela and Taylor that half of them would’ve taken the truck back, changed their clothes, and brought food back for the others before they would go back and change out of their gear.

“Y/N, what’s the latest?” Uncle Bobby asked as he saw her standing in the doorway.

“He’s responding well to treatment. His oxygen levels are coming up. There’s still a long way to go, but he’s definitely going in the right direction,” she responded.

“Thank you for everything you’ve done for him,” Uncle Bobby smiled and walked towards her. “Is your shift over, Princess?”

“Yeah, I wanted to stay, but-”

“You reached your quota again, didn’t you?” Bobby chuckled.

“Maybe…” Y/N grinned. “But, there were extenuating circumstances this week which have been resolved.”

“So, you’re telling me it’s not gonna become the norm for you to go above and beyond?” he smirked, his eyes twinkling as he teased her.

“I hope not,” Y/N smiled softly, her eyes falling on Dean, and Bobby grinned, hoping, just like his niece, that things would work out between the couple.

“You should say goodbye to him before you go,” Bobby told her softly. Y/N nodded and stepped tentatively towards where Dean stood with Benny and Charlie.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Dean smiled as she stepped beside him. “Thanks for what you did for Cas.”

“It’s nothing, just doing my job,” she lowered her gaze shyly.

“Modest much?” Charlie chuckled. “What you did was heroic!”

“Oh no, that’s not… I don’t… You guys are the real heroes here,” Y/N shifted on her feet, uncomfortable with the attention.

“Uh, can I talk to you? Outside?” Dean said, gently pushing her towards the door and she nodded gratefully at his timely rescue.

“Thanks for getting me out of there, De,” she giggled as they stepped outside.

“Well, Charlie is right about the modest thing. You’ve never done well with attention or praise,” he chuckled softly. “So, I hate to do this, but about tonight-”

“Hey, it’s fine, Dean. You’re where you need to be, and Cas is more important than our date,” Y/N said.

Dean smiled, grateful that she got it. Though he wouldn’t say Cas was more important than her, he was a higher priority right now. “Thanks for understanding, Princess. I’ll make it up to you.”

“You better,” she grinned.

“Cross my heart,” Dean smirked. “Now, your shift is over, Nurse Singer, and I think you should go home and sleep. You look dead on your feet.”

“Yeah. I feel like I could sleep until I’m back on shift!” Y/N chuckled.

“Well, if you don’t pass out for four whole days,” Dean laughed. “Call me when you’ve had some rest. Maybe we could rearrange our date?”

“I’d like that,” Y/N nodded and tried to suppress a yawn.

“Go home! Text me when you get there so I know you’re safe,” Dean said, kissing her forehead.

“Alright, I’m going! Keep me updated on Cas, please?” she responded as she stepped backwards away from Dean.

“You got it,” Dean smiled, watching her turn around and walk down the hallway.

“Hey, Y/N!” he shouted, smirking when she turned around. “Good morning, beautiful.”

“Good night, handsome,” Y/N grinned back before turning and continuing down the hallway.

Y/N spent her first day off sleeping for three to four hours, eating, watching television, doing chores for three to four hours, and then going back to sleep. During one of her awake times, she’d called Dean, and he’d happily let her know that Cas was officially “stable” and out of the woods. He’d be on his feet and heading home in no time.

They’d agreed to wait a few days before planning their date so Dean could be on hand to help Cas if he needed it. No doubt he’d be feeling the impact of the damage to his lungs and airways for a few weeks yet and would likely tire doing the most mundane of tasks.

Dean had apologised profusely and again promised to make it up to her, but Y/N convinced him there was no need, and she didn’t mind waiting a little longer for him.

“Absence makes the heart grow fonder, right?” she’d teased him.

“So they tell me,” Dean huffed lightly, suggesting just a hint of frustration.

“Come on, De. We’ve waited twelve years. What’s a few more days?” Y/N chuckled, trying to lighten his mood.

“Yeah, I know. Doesn’t mean I need to like it, Princess.”

“Aww, are you missing me?” she teased again.

“Yeah, I am,” he sighed, and Y/N’s heart ached.

“Well, I know Cas will be taking up a lot of your time the next few days, but you know where I am if you wanna come over for dinner.”

“If I can, I will, sweetheart,” he sighed again. “Just wish I could promise.”

“Then promise to give me the best second date ever,” she giggled.

“Now that I can promise,” Dean said, and Y/N could hear the grin in his voice.

“Oh, I know you will!” Y/N giggled again, and Dean chuckled softly.

“I gotta go, Princess. I’ll call you later?”

“Can’t wait! Bye, De.”

“Bye, Y/N/N.”

Next Chapter >>

Tags: @acitygrownwillow @akshi8278 @ashbatz @candy-coated-misery0731 @chriszgirl92 @deans-baby-momma @deans-spinster-witch @deansbbyx @deanwanddamons @duncanhillscoffeecups @foxyjwls007 @giggles1026 @globetrotter28 @hobby27 @hoboal87 @impala67rollingthroughtown @iprobablyshipit91 @jackles010378 @jamerlynn @jc-winchester @k-slla @kazsrm67 @kmc1989 @lacilou @ladysparkles78 @leigh70 @lyarr24 @maliburenee @michecolegate @mrsjenniferwinchester @nancymcl @negans-lucille-tblr @nelachu2423 @octoberclidan @perpetualabsurdity @roseblue373 @sandlee44 @sexyvixen7 @snackles87 @spnbaby-67 @spnwoman @stixnstripesworld @stoneyggirl2 @suckitands33 @synmorite @tristanrosspada-ackles @twinkleinadiamondsky @waters-2567 @winchestergirl1720

[aemiron-main]

heyy so. just wondering what happened with will80sbyers bcs i'm so confused??

Hey, anon! Great question, I’m going to use this ask to properly lay it out, seeing as many people (Dani included) seem determined to distort what actually happened. So, with that said:

What Happened Recently With Dani/ Will80sByers ?

I don’t really care anymore but I’m just going to just lay all of it out simply because I’m sick of being accused of saying/doing things that I didn’t do and also sick of watching Dani play the victim & continuing to double down on her gross comments as usual. Also I’m using screenshots simply because I’m sick of playing a game of telephone with this & I’d rather just put the screenshots right there instead of trying to paraphrase 50 million different posts.

So, it started here, when Dani made this post: 

And look, I deeply disagree with that post (as I do with many of the posts of Dani’s that are going to be in that post), but that post wasn’t the issue (I’ll explain what the actual issue was in a second). And then, after Dani posted that, she got multiple anons (which, we'll also come back to Dani's responses to these anons in a second because that ties into my actual issue with Dani):

First anon:

Second anon:

Third anon:

Fourth anon:

And then Dani posted this:

And then Dani doubled down on this post in her replies:

I was sent screenshots of this post about rape forgiveness and of some of the previous anons since a.) it involved Edward etc and later b.) it involved Henry analysts being accused of being rapist apologists. I saw the anons before I saw the rape apologist post. And then Dani got this anon:

This anon claims to known “exactly” who is sending the anons and goes off about a bunch of stuff, and then Dani got this anon:

Accusing me of having sent this anon:

Which, is it just me or is it interesting that the original anon and the anon accusing me of having sent the original anon both have a very similar typing style, and that the person accusing me of sending it was super quick to point out things like the use of the word “rancid” which is supposedly an indication that I wrote the ask?

Like, is it not a bit odd that the second anon just immediately picked up on that? It’s almost like both anons were written by the same person, some person who clearly has some sort of issue with me and wants to make it seem like I was going onto Dani’s blog to start shit.

Whether people believe me or not, I know that I didn’t send that anon to Dani, so I’d love to know who did. It’s either somebody super passionate about Edward (which is a super tiny group of people), or, it’s somebody passionate about disliking me. If I wanted to criticize Dani’s analysis/takes on Henry/whatever, I would simply do so publicly, as I always have.

It’s funny to me that people will criticize me so often for being upfront about this stuff/”namedropping”/specifically for NOT doing things anonymously, but then as soon as anonymous stuff pops up, I’m the main suspect?? Make up your minds, please! 

And anyway, that brief tangent aside, Dani also got this anon:

And for some reason, people were super upset that I “namedropped” Dani. Which I really don’t understand- she has a name/username that she displays publicly, and these are posts that she posted publicly. I don’t understand why it’s such a big issue to “namedrop” somebody regarding posts that they made publicly. I personally find the vaguing and dancing and around issues without ever saying names far more frustrating. If you’re willing to post something publicly under your public name/username that you choose to display on your blog, why is it such an issue for somebody to name you when discussing said post?? It’s not like I broke into her house and pulled the post out of a secret safe under her floorboards 😭😭

And it’s also funny as hell that Dani uses the word “spying” in this context because a.) people were dm’ing me the shit that she said, I wan’t “spying” on a damn thing and b.) even if i did go onto her blog, in what world is going onto somebody’s public blog with their public posts “spying”? It’s clear that Dani was just grasping at straws in an attempt to avoid addressing the actual issues at hand (her gross comments).

Dani claims that she was just “saying her opinion on a character,” and the anon says that I was shittalking Dani for her takes on Henry. Which, again, both of them are ignoring the actual issue here. Do I think that Dani’s takes on Henry are factually incorrect, deeply biased, and -gasp- even stupid? Yes. Would I have bothered making all of the posts that I did/would I have been as upset as I was if the issue was simply Dani having bad takes about Henry? NO!!!!!

Dani having bad takes and, specifically, having bad takes about Henry is nothing new. Sky is blue, grass is green, I think Dani’s takes on Henry and on the rest of the show are factually incorrect and heavily biased, as I always have. That wasn’t the key issue here.But as previously mentioned what I was actually upset about was: 

a.) Dani comparing Henry analysis to rape sympathizers & saying that we would “probably forgive IRL rape” and also saying that would be “nazi sympathizers

b.) Dani making posts re: Henry where she made comments about people dealing with personality disorders in real-life and where she didn’t bother backing up any of her claims about “people who just want to kill people,” with any actual medical facts or actual disagnoses/actual facts about those diagnoses, and instead, relied on her surface-level opinions of Henry and his behaviour in the show to say that he had a personality disorder that just makes him want to kill people and then used THAT and Henry’s behaviour in the show to draw conclusions about real-life people with personality disorders.

It came across as weird and stigmatizing and ableist on Dani’s part, hence why I was upset by it. And hell, it wasn't even a Huge Issue at first. just ignorant and weird on Dani's behalf and, I just made a minor bitchpost about it, most of which was in the tags no less, and then the rapist/nazi comments were the big issue.

When it comes to the ableism, these three posts/responses of Dani’s were the ones I had an issue with:

1.)

2.)

3.)

The issues I have with these posts & why it comes across as ableist to me was that Dani never actually names this mysterious murderer personality disorder. She simply uses “personality disorder” as a stand-in to encompass all of Henry's traits (many of which are simply harmless autistic traits) and as far as I can tell, never actually named a specific personality disorder, and instead, just kept lumping all of Vecna's supposed crimes (rape, murder, etc) under some ambiguous serial murderer personality disorder. Dani also talked in one of those responses about Henry being born with a lack of empathy and that being tied to his personality disorder that makes him kill people which, not only is that a false claim about Henry (which isn't the point/issue here bc again I expect that from Dani), but it's also stigmatizing and weird/ableist to throw around a lack of empathy as being tied to the reason why he supposedly ends up as a murderer (dani also then tries to say he was born neutral and all his actions are just conscious choice which is weird considering that she Just connected his actions/murders to being the result of a lack of empathy without any actual evidence to support this and further stigmatizing anyone that's low-empathy. ) My main point is that it's definitely veering into ableism and hatred, specifically when Dani's talking in the context of real-life people, to never actually name a specific disorder, and instead just seemingly invent some sort of magical personality disorder that makes you a.) murder people and b.) unable to hold a conversation and also just seems to lump all personality disorders together. AGAIN, it wasn't even a huge issue at first, just annoyance with Dani's ignorance/her getting into ableism territory while acting morally superior, and the big issue was the rapist/nazi comments.

And Dani's response to criticism of ableism was as follows:

And regarding this, I know that Dani never outright said that all people with personality disorders enjoy killing people, but she IS claiming that people with personality disorders enjoy killing people & just using "personality disorders" as a lump term/she's coming very close to claiming that all people with personality disorders do. She literally just uses "personality disorder/personality disorders" as her reason for Henry/Vecna's crimes without ever actually providing an actual disorder or evidence. She IS lumping them together. It's right there in those anon responses from earlier. And I already talked in another post (way before any of this drama/not connected to Dani) re: why what we read in the scripts isn't some Inherent Truth, and that's neither here nor there because I'm not here to go through everything that's incorrect lore-wise/analysis wise in Dani's responses because i'd be here all day. I'm just trying to point out what the Actual Issue was re: ableism (which I just made one annoyed post about and the rest of my pissed off posting was regarding the rape apologist comment from dani so its not even like the ableism thing was a Massive Huge Issue at first), and the actual issue re: ableism and dani was the way that Dani just lumps all personality disorders together/uses "personality disorder" as this weird nebulous scapegoat for all sorts of crimes. And regarding, that one small annoyed initial post I made, this was it:

And it was specifically about Dani making things up about Henry and Edward re: some mythical magical personality disorder that they supposedly have that makes them want to kill people, and I was frustrated with the ableism involved in that.

And I also mention specifically in the tags of said post that this was regarding the the ableism (as I hadnt’ seen the rapist post yet), and how this wasn’t just a matter of me disagreeing with Dani/her having bad takes/how that wasn't the core issue but specifically a matter of the ableism and Dani acting morally superior while also continuing to use personality disorders as this nebulous scapegoat term.

And later on, as I mentioned earlier, Dani made this post: 

Which, is pretty self explanatory, so then not only was I annoyed/bitchposting about Henry analysts being lumped in with rape apologists, but also about the comparison to nazi sympathizers. LIke. Come on. Dani sat there and complained about people "sending her mean anons over a tv show" while also calling people rapist and nazi apologists over a tv show. Personally, I'd take the mean anons any day.

So, long story short, anon- it was a shitshow. My actual issue was never Dani’s poorly done analysis/bad takes on Henry- my key issue was with Henry analysts being accused of forgiving IRL rapists & being compared to Nazi sympathizers simply for analyzing a character in a TV show.

And yet, Dani and all her asskissing anons continue to dodge the point (as usual) act like all of my frustration was simply because she doesn’t like Henry/because she disagrees with Henry analysis.

It’s annoying as all hell to watch Dani play the victim while missing the actual issue & acting like she’s being “harassed for sharing her opinion on a character,” when the actual issue at hand was her gross comment about rape apologism, her gross comment about nazi sympathizing, and her weird/very much bordering on ableist by being so broad & lacking actual evidence comments about personality disorders.

It’s especially annoying since if anyone harasses other people for sharing their opinions on characters it’s Dani accusing people of being biphobic when they disagree with her bi mike analysis, and Dani’s whole group of asskissing anons.

A few months back, I had to shut down my anon box entirely because I was just getting constant anons specifically regarding Dani and her posts & calling me biphobic for making gay Mike analysis/for criticizing literally any aspect of any bi Mike analyses and claiming that I was just being “misogynistic and biphobic” despite hilariously never actually being able to point to which of my claims were supposedly misogynistic or biphobic. And I also had some anons making comments about me being trans and how that must tie into internalized misogyny and biphobia and how I must not actually understand gay mens’ experiences and therefore it’s wrong for me to bring up gay mens’ experiences since I’m apparently just actually a bi girl who has internalized misogyny and biphobia, and not a gay trans dude. (I just ended up deleting/blocking those anons because the last thing I needed was ANOTHER round of terfs getting wind of it and hounding my blog, esp since this was in my earlier days on tumblr where I wasn't as comfortable with confrontation as I am now/didn't have a backup of my blog incase something happened, but now I wish I had them because it was rlly Smthn to say over to someone over st discourse)

And while it would be unfair to pin those anons on Dani specifically, as they’re anonymous and I don’t know who sent them, and while I’m not saying she sent them as I don’t actually think she did, they were definitely defending her/her analysis, and so it’s ironic to see the same sort of Dani stan anons who sent ME hateful stuff over my opinions on a character coddling Dani because somebody criticized her ableist remarks and her rape and nazi apologism remarks. 

And those same sort of anons also kept telling me to shut up and not post anymore/hollered about how bad my gay Mike posts are which I don't give a shit I'll make whatever posts I want but again, just. Ironic. Considering how many of her anons were upset that Dani was being "silenced and harrassed".

And I’m far from the same person who’s dealt with bitchy anons tied directly to Dani’s fans/stans/little group, whatever you want to call it. Dani is well-known ATP for throwing biphobia accusations at anyone who disagrees with her analysis, so it seems like many of her comments about people (such as me) being unable to handle differing opinions are nothing more than projection on her part.

Anyway! There’s a long rant, anon! I’m over it at this point, but figured it’d be a good idea to summarize it all here, seeing as Dani seems fixated on making herself the victim & twisting things around as usual, and I don’t appreciate being made into some sort of bad guy for something that isn’t true/because Dani and others insist on ignoring the reality of what my issue was/why I was upset and accusing me of “sending my hounds” to Dani’s inbox.

Which like. What hounds?? What legions of people at my disposal do people think I have?? If my hounds are listening, can you guys do my laundry or smthn?? Can we meet?? Kiss on the mouth maybe?? 

Even the ableist/weird remarks about personality disorders weren't That Big Of A Deal, just ignorant and dumb on Dani's part, and I just made ONE minor bitchpost on the topic initially, but then I started getting accused of sending anons that I didn't send, and THEN dani came out with the rapist and nazi posts and THAT'S what sparked my main bitchposting/criticism of her.

Anyway, I never sent anyone to Dani, I never sent a damn thing to Dani my own self, *Bill Clinton voice* I DID NOT HAVE ANONYMOUS RELATIONS WITH THAT BLOG!! 

Hope that finally clears things up for you and everyone else, anon.

(and also just as i was finishing this up, found out that dani as of this morning has apparently doubled down on the rape and nazi comments AGAIN. my god.)

[electronickingdomfox]

"The Trellisane Confrontation" review

Novel by David Dvorkin from 1984. Finally a cover that looks a bit different! By the way, that's Chapel there, and not some random lady that never shows up, as I thought at first.

Is this high literature? Surely not. The prose is pretty simplistic and straight to the point. Is it very original? Also nope. The plot is a mishmash of everything TOS, put together: there are two alien races at war, and on top of that the Enterprise is hijacked and taken from Kirk, and on top of that there are Klingons, and on top of that, Romulans. Also McCoy struggles to free slaves, and dines with cannibals. And then Chapel finds (briefly) love, when she enters into communion with a composite being that looks like a ball of flesh (okay, THAT'S new, and not really as disturbing as it seems at first; though there are some disturbing things in this novel). Having said all that, did I enjoy this book? Hell, yeah! (see everything above).

With so many things going on, the plot can be a bit confusing, as it keeps branching out when characters go their separate ways. Though somehow, everything clicks. There's also an underlying theme of IDIC to help bring things together. The resolution of the main conflict, however, is less than satisfactory. Let's be frank; the political situation in the planet Trellisane when the Enterprise leaves is... well, shit. There's no way that's not gonna end in another war. But Kirk seems satisfied so...

As for characterization, I found it spot-on, which is not frequent in these novels (usually there's something that seems "off"). The focus is more on action than character development, but you get those glimpses of personality. Spock is sassy, and sometimes Kirk discovers those cracks in his Vulcan mask, and wonders if his occasional humor isn't really another way to hide his true emotions. Kirk has his boyish, fun-loving side in addition to his responsible side as starship captain. Scotty is a badass, and not just a miracle worker. And McCoy is particularly developed, with his softness under a crusty exterior, and his disregard for cruel authority figures. Still, I've found reviews of this novel criticizing it for being out-of-character, which I truly can't understand. If anything, the easy way in which the Enterprise is hijacked is a bit unbelievable. And Sulu makes a really, really stupid mistake while having the con, that triggers the whole problem. But hey, Sulu isn't yet a Captain, and even then, he's just a fallible human! I don't see how having a crew that's always impeccably perfect is any more realistic...

Spoilers under the cut (it's a short novel, but a long plot):

Kirk's mission this time around consists in taking a bunch of dangerous criminals and bringing them to a more secure prison. The criminals are fanatics that believe the Federation should conquer as much territory as possible, so they were trying to enter the Romulan Neutral Zone to trigger a war. They consist of the leader, Hander Morl, his four bodyguards, and a curious creature: an Onctiliian. This race has four sexes, and when they mate, all four individuals are permanently merged in a ball of flesh (body horror much), and can't exist separately anymore. In this state, Onctiliians are very dangerous and aggresive.

However, Kirk receives a fading distress call from Trellisane, vaguely mentioning Klingons. So he decides to investigate this planet before putting the criminals in prison (aka "wrong decision"). Kirk, Spock and McCoy meet the Trellisane leader, who explains they're under attack from the neighboring planet, Sealon (populated by some aquatic, seal-like beings). They suspect the Klingons are behind the sudden weapon development of Sealon. At first, the Trellisanian come off as the peaceful, advanced, but somewhat naive race. While the Sealons are described as barbaric. But things aren't quite so simple.

Meanwhile, the Enterprise is attacked by Sealon ships. Sulu underestimates them, and the ship gets a direct hit, which affects the security cells. The prisoners escape, and after killing some redshirts, they manage to reach the bridge, seal up the doors, and hold everyone there at gunpoint. But the Onctiliian has been seriously injured and goes a different way. The rest of the crew only know the prisoners have escaped, and are unaware of the situation in the bridge. Morl leaves the red alarm flaring, so everyone is busy elsewhere, and forces the bridge crew to depart to the Neutral Zone, to trigger his war. And Kirk watches his ship warping away under his nose.

Down in the planet, the trio find out the Trellisane government is completely ineffectual, so they try to take matters into their hands (violation of the Prime Directive, of course, but it's not like they can do much else this time). McCoy starts tending to the wounded, and discovers strange brain implants in some of them, which he removes. Soon, it becomes apparent that Trellisane has a slave class, which is treated like animals and denied all rights, so McCoy has to cure them in secret. For their part, Kirk and Spock rally the slaves (the only willing to fight), and help them plant explosives under the ocean, where the Sealons are already building bases.

In the Enterprise, Scotty uses his brains and notices something is wrong. He gets to the bridge and is captured as well. But he improvises an excuse about the warp engines being very damaged, and convinces Morl to stop the ship for maintenance, thus gaining some time. Chapel has found the injured Onctiliian, now dying, since one of its four members was killed. She overcomes her fear, and tries to remove the corpse, so the rest of the body can heal. But upon coming in contact with the link spot, the Onctiliian accepts her as a new fourth member, and a mind link is established between them. With the new input from Chapel, more peaceful and intelligent, the creature understands how wrong are Morl's ways.

Again back in the planet, Kirk and Spock are captured by Sealons in one of their bombing incursions, and brought to their underwater base. Effectively, the base is run by Klingons, the real masterminds behind the war. Then, the Klingons bring them to their main base in Sealon. Kirk explains the situation with the Enterprise, and convinces the Klingon leader that, if the Romulans are provoked, they'll also interfere with Klingon affairs in this sector. The Klingon captain agrees to take Kirk to his ship, so he can regain it and avert the conflict. But then Kirk must surrender the Enterprise to the Klingons (ha! gullible Klingon much!). Meanwhile, Spock escapes his imprisonment, after Sealon rebels start attacking Klingon infrastructures. He comes face to face with the Sealon leader, and of course can't resist the temptation of mind-melding with him. This gives Spock a new viewpoint about the Sealons.

As for McCoy, he's at his wit's end with the Trellisanian and their classism. To make things worse, he discovers the brain implants are used to control slaves, and even kill them on the spot when they misbehave. And then comes... the revelation (actually, you can see it coming since earlier in the novel, but still...). The Trellisanian leader says McCoy is an hypocrite, for defending the slaves and still eating meat. He brings the doctor to a butcher house, and there McCoy discovers the meat actually came from slaves. It's a shame that McCoy's coping with this fact isn't explored further (Tarsus IV anyone?).

In the end, the Enterprise bridge is regained when Chapel bursts in, with her Onctiliian bondmate wreaking havoc on all the bad guys. The creature dies in the fight, however, freeing Chapel from the bond (and she's pretty sad about it). Morl has a villanous breakdown, and at last surrenders, when Kirk beams in the bridge. The Romulans have been attracted by the suspicious presence of the Enterprise near their border. But Kirk invites both the Romulan and the Klingon captains to his ship, to reach a cooperation agreement in regards to Trellisane and Sealon (okay, this was waaaay too easy). Down in the planet, Spock has reunited with McCoy, and together they organize a meeting between Trellisane and Sealon leaders, to reach another agreement. First, the slaves must be set free, if Trellisane ever wants to receive help from the Federation. And the Sealons are allowed to keep the conquered oceans, if they share the fishing. I think it's a rather shitty arrangement that leaves nobody happy (not even the slaves, since the grudge is still there). But anyway, both the Trellisanians and the Sealons are rather shitty in their own ways, so there.

Spirk Meter: 1/10*. Very little. But Spock reflects a moment about how much he admires his Captain, for having such a perfect balance between logic and emotion (but it's not hero-worship, nope...). However, his ideal image is suddenly broken, when he sees Kirk excited like a little boy, at the prospect of rowing in a boat.

Is it my impression, or do male authors gravitate much more towards McKirk and Spones, while books written by women are more spirky? In the first page, we already have Kirk looking up and down at Bones in his dress uniform, and telling him that his old country doctor persona is all he needs to impress the colonists. And then, Kirk brings McCoy to his cabin, closes the door, and undresses in front of him (okay, he needs to change into his dress uniform too, but still...).

Then, at the end, McCoy is discussing with Spock about cross-breeding between different species, when he changes the subject, to comment on Spock's warm, human emotion upon reuniting with him. McCoy wants Spock to admit he was worried about him, but yet again, Spock is cold and hurts him. McCoy goes away, angry, and Chapel reprimands Spock for being so cruel, since the doctor is sensitive. Spock agrees. And adds he's a remarkable doctor, and probably derives pleasure from insulting and being insulted by Spock, as it's his only way of showing his affection. All this in the context of IDIC, and Chapel's recent experience as a mate of the Onctiliian. Hmmm...

*A 10 in this scale is the most obvious spirk moments in TOS. Think of the back massage, "You make me believe in miracles", or "Amok Time" for example.

[antianakin]

Is there a specific pro Jedi tag on AO3 that can be used to filter out anti and criticals? Cause I keep searching for Luke and Leia time travel fics where they save the galaxy and give Palpatine a headache (saving Anakin is potentially a bonus to those other two), but the vast majority are Jedi critical at LEAST.

... Speaking of, do you know any good time travel Luke and Leia fics where they save the galaxy, give Palps a headache (and maybe save Anakin cause Luke kept asking and Leia just decided to help on behalf of her own sanity)?

The main tag I was able to find seems to be "Jedi Appreciation" which includes things like "Jedi Order Respected", "Jedi Culture Respected," "Jedi Culture Appreciated", "Jedi Positive", "Jedi Order Positive", "Pro Jedi", and "Pro Jedi Order". I also found tags more specifically related to the Council, like "Jedi Council Appreciation" and "Good Jedi Council." I'm a TAD suspicious of the second one since the wording of it seems to lean more towards having adjusted the Jedi Council in order to BE "good" as opposed to recognizing they're ALREADY good, but it's potentially worth a look through to see (I found one that claimed to have some Yoda bashing and another saying "they are not the assholes in this story", as just two examples of why this particular tag might be suspect).

There's also the more basic "Jedi Culture & Customs" tag which is likely more of a mixed bag and doesn't necessarily promise POSITIVITY about the Jedi, just that it's EXPLORING Jedi culture and customs, so, you know, take it with a grain of salt.

Some other tags I found just in a basic search: "Jedi as Found Family", "Love Doesn't Equal Attachment", "Clone Troopers and Jedi as Found Family", and "Protective Jedi."

I will also say that it is critical for you as a reader NOT to blindly trust any of these tags. People can and do tag their fics with "Jedi Positive" or "Jedi Appreciation" and then it ends up with plotlines where the Jedi change their culture so that members can marry or they go the grey Jedi route where they realize they should be using both light and dark to find balance or whatever. As I mentioned above, too, it can sometimes mean they just rewrite the Jedi to be closer to what the WRITER thinks the Jedi should be and is now "positive" or it's being positive about the Order at the expense of specific Jedi like Yoda or Mace who are still bashed and vilified. Keep an eye out for other tags on the fic that might reveal more anti or critical elements and just be aware when reading the fic that there is no tag that is guaranteed to filter out EVERYTHING you don't want to read and be ready to hit that back button.

I don't tend to read a lot of time travel fics just in general and the ONLY fic I have read that involves Luke/Leia time traveling is there was a spring of storms by blackkat where Leia's grief in the moment of Alderaan's destruction causes her to reach out in the Force instinctively and propel her, Bail, and Luke back to shortly after the start of the Clone War. It's only 2 chapters in, however, so the story has barely started and I cannot guarantee anything about saving Anakin. With these two chapters, though, I can say that it is absolutely pro Jedi and probably not very Anakin positive. I personally really love this set-up and while it's remained unfinished for quite a while, the author has said in the past that if the fic is still up on AO3 then it's not abandoned, so I am still hoping for the day they come back to this one because it looks INCREDIBLE.

If anyone else has some pro Jedi recommendations for Luke/Leia time travel fics, feel free to let us know!

EDIT: The reason I had to search for tags is because I have never personally used them for myself to LOOK for fics. I usually have a ship or a dynamic that I get invested in and start looking for, find some authors I really like, and then go through all of their fics and bookmarks because if an author WRITES fic that's Pro Jedi, chances are they READ fic that's Pro Jedi too. And then you just rinse and repeat from there. Sometimes there'll be a tag like "X character needs a hug" or something I go through if I notice it pops up enough. I primarily use tags like the ones above as more of a screener when I'm looking through someone's bookmarks or a general ship tag search. I start by looking at the summary to try to figure out the actual premise of the fic and then once I decide I might be interested, I give the tags a scan to see if anything comes up that gives a better idea of what is in the fic that'll make me more interested or immediately back out. Like I said, many a fic has had "pro Jedi" or "Jedi positive" tags and still ended up in what I would consider to be closer to "Jedi critical" these days. A better guarantee for me is knowing that someone bookmarked this fic that has written fic I personally find to be pro Jedi, so that's the method I use.

[selmasemlan]

Revelations and Resolutions

Summary: In the austere headquarters of the International Hero Commission, Endeavor and his interns face a stern reckoning for jeopardizing a critical mission, while Luna, now a seasoned and commanding hero, saves them from severe consequences, leaving Todoroki captivated by her strength and determined to win her heart.

Pairing: Todoroki Shoto x Luna Aizawa (OFC), Bakugo Katsuki x Luna Aizawa (Platonic), Midoriya Izuku x Luna Aizawa (Platonic)

Author note: This is part 2 of this multivers. Make sure to check out the masterlist for the Multiverse of Luna

Warning: mention of violence, Endeavor getting humbled

Word count: 1554

Series masterlist

Revelations and Resolutions

The imposing headquarters of the International Hero Commission in Japan was a stark contrast to the familiar halls of U.A. High. Its cold, marble floors and towering glass walls reflected the austere nature of the work conducted within. This was where the world’s most elite heroes were trained, where decisions that affected the global hero community were made, and where missions of the utmost importance were planned and executed.

As Endeavor, Bakugo, Midoriya, and Todoroki walked through the wide corridors, their footsteps echoed ominously. They were summoned to face the consequences of the previous night’s mission—a mission that had gone far from according to plan.

“Stay sharp,” Endeavor muttered, his voice tinged with frustration as they approached a large, ornately decorated door. The plaque beside it read Johanna Lees, Superior. Endeavor had faced numerous challenges in his career, but the weight of this meeting pressed down on him like never before.

The door creaked open, revealing a spacious, dimly lit office. The walls were lined with bookshelves filled with tomes on international law, hero tactics, and political strategy. A large desk dominated the room, behind which sat Johanna Lees, the Superior of the International Hero Commission in Japan. Her presence exuded authority, with her sharp eyes scanning each of them as they entered. She was a woman in her early fifties, with silver hair tied back in a neat bun and an expression that could shift from warmth to steel in an instant.

In front of her, seated with perfect posture and a composed expression, was Luna. Her dark brown hair, streaked with subtle red highlights, cascaded down her back. As she spoke to Johanna, the boys couldn’t help but notice how different she seemed—no longer the girl they knew, but a fully grown and capable hero.

Luna’s voice was steady as she reported the previous night’s events. “As I was saying, Superior Lees, we disseminated the information to the Japanese Hero Commission and all hero agencies within the city, clearly stating that no one should interfere with our mission. We received acknowledgments from all parties, including Endeavor’s agency. Despite this, Endeavor chose to intervene, which complicated the situation and made it significantly harder to apprehend our primary suspect.”

Johanna nodded thoughtfully, her fingers steepled as she listened. “And the outcome?”

“The suspect we apprehended was not the target we had originally aimed for,” Luna continued, her tone professional and precise. “Their capture did yield some useful intelligence, but our main target is still at large. My team has been working non-stop to track them down. We believe we may have a lead.”

Just then, the door opened, and Mamoru Monoma stepped in, his presence as composed as Luna’s. His golden hair caught the light as he approached the desk, and there was a slight urgency in his usually calm demeanor. “Luna, we’ve located the lead. We need to move quickly.”

Luna stood up immediately, her chair sliding back smoothly as she turned to face Johanna. There was a subtle tension in the air as she waited for permission to leave, her focus solely on the mission.

Johanna met her gaze and gave a curt nod. “Go.”

Without another word, Luna and Mamoru left the room, their movements in sync as they exited. Luna’s hair swished behind her as she walked, the red highlights glowing like embers against the dark brown. The door closed softly behind them, leaving the room in a weighted silence.

Endeavor, who had been silently fuming, finally spoke up, his voice a low growl. “What’s the importance of this mission? Why all the secrecy?”

Johanna’s demeanor shifted instantly. The warm, almost maternal presence she had shown Luna was replaced by a cold, unyielding authority as she fixed her gaze on Endeavor. “You compromised an operation of critical importance,” she began, her voice sharp. “This mission isn’t just another case, Endeavor. It’s an international effort to dismantle one of the most powerful human trafficking organizations in the world. Children are being kidnapped from across the globe, their lives destroyed, and you almost ruined our chance to end it.”

The room fell silent, the gravity of her words sinking in. Endeavor’s eyes widened in shock, the realization of his blunder hitting him with full force. He had been so focused on the immediate threat, on being the hero, that he hadn’t considered the bigger picture.

Bakugo, Midoriya, and Todoroki exchanged uneasy glances. Midoriya, always one to ask questions, tentatively raised his hand, his voice filled with concern. “Superior Lees, are we… qualified for a mission like this?”

Johanna’s lips curled into a faint, humorless smile. “Qualified? Luna and her team are more than qualified. They’re already fully graduated pro heroes on the international level. This isn’t their first mission of this caliber—it’s one of many.”

Endeavor’s shock deepened, and for the first time, doubt crept into his eyes. He had assumed he was dealing with mere students, still learning the ropes, not realizing that Luna and her team were operating on an entirely different level.

Seeing his disbelief, Johanna stood and gestured for them to follow her. “Come with me.”

They walked through the hallways until they reached a large operations room. Inside, Luna and her team were gathered around a digital map, discussing tactics in low, serious tones. The room was filled with the soft hum of technology and the quiet murmur of voices, each member focused on the task at hand.

“Luna’s team is currently planning their approach to arresting the main suspect,” Johanna explained as she watched them work. “Their every move is calculated, their every decision backed by years of training and experience.”

She then turned to face Endeavor, her expression hardening once more. “Let me make this clear: while the Japanese Hero Commission may have summoned you, an order from the International Hero Commission takes precedence. You’re facing the very real possibility of suspension from hero work, Endeavor. And the same goes for your interns.”

A palpable tension filled the air as Endeavor and the boys processed her words. Bakugo’s usual bravado wavered, Midoriya looked like he was about to pass out, and even Todoroki, who was usually calm and collected, seemed to falter.

Johanna let the silence hang for a moment before calling out to Luna. “Luna, come here.”

Luna, still deep in discussion with her team, paused and then excused herself before walking over. She stood before Johanna with an air of calm authority that belied her age.

“What should we do with Endeavor and his interns?” Johanna asked, her tone one of genuine inquiry, as if Luna’s opinion was the only one that mattered.

Luna didn’t hesitate. “They should all be suspended. However,” she added, glancing at the boys, “because of the confusion created by the national commission, Endeavor should receive a formal warning, and the boys should walk away without punishment. International relations and law are taught in the second year of hero studies, and they’re only first years. They had no way of knowing the protocols that applied in this situation.”

Johanna considered her words carefully, then nodded in agreement. “Very well.”

Luna gave a slight bow of respect before turning to leave. As she walked away, her expression remained calm, her mind already returning to the mission at hand.

Johanna watched her go, then turned back to Endeavor and the boys, her expression unreadable. “Luna just saved your asses,” she said plainly. “Remember that.”

As Luna disappeared into the throng of heroes, Endeavor and the boys stood there, still processing everything that had just transpired. The reality of how much they had underestimated Luna, and the gravity of the situation they had stumbled into, weighed heavily on them.

Todoroki, however, was fixated on Luna’s retreating figure, his eyes filled with admiration. He was captivated by the way she carried herself, the confidence in her step, and the way she had commanded the room with just a few words. He had never seen anyone reduce his father to silence like that, let alone someone his own age.

And then, breaking the silence, Todoroki spoke up, his voice filled with newfound determination and a hint of something deeper. “Where is Mother’s wedding ring?”

Endeavor looked at his son, confused. “What?”

Todoroki’s eyes never left the door through which Luna had exited. “I’m going to marry that girl.”

Bakugo’s reaction was immediate. “What the hell, Icy Hot?!” he barked, his voice bristling with incredulity.

Midoriya, equally shocked, stammered, “T-Todoroki-kun! You can’t just… I mean, she’s…”

But Todoroki was unfazed, his expression softening slightly as he continued to stare in the direction Luna had gone. For once, Bakugo and Midoriya were left without a retort, their protests dying in their throats as they realized just how serious Todoroki was.

Johanna, watching the exchange with a bemused expression, shook her head slightly before turning back to her office. “Good luck, boys,” she murmured under her breath, leaving them to grapple with the aftermath of their encounter with Luna.

The weight of her words, combined with the realization of what had just transpired, left Endeavor and his interns standing there, speechless and star-struck. The world they thought they knew had just expanded, and Luna was at the center of it, reshaping everything they thought they understood about heroism, power, and authority.

[yuri-is-online]

Saturday Night Question (MMO AU)

a/n: Inspired by Recovery of an MMO Junkie and that bit of Ch. 6 where Idia assigns all the OB Boys rpg classes. Title comes from the op track which I highly recommend. (x) Loose modern au, NRC is an actual college everyone attends and Grim is still a talking cat-weasel-monster. Not everyone knows each other IRL so expect some minor catfishing. The MMO is based off of Final Fantasy XIV and will contain references to class and game mechanics but no spoilers.

For those unfamiliar with FFXIV chats

[FC] <Tempura Kun> this is the guild chat. Everyone in the guild can see this.

Tempura Kun >> this is a whisper, only two people can see this

[NOVICE] Tempura Kun: this is the novice network for mentors, only Riddle can see this

[Tempura Kun] if someone is texting it will be portrayed like this.

LFM- STYX (FC) recruiting, static needs a pure healer/off tank. Serious offers only.

Your buddy Epel talks you into trying critically acclaimed mmo First Fantasia because it has a thirty day free trial with unlimited game time and includes the first expansion as a joke but as college gets more stressful and you struggle to make irl connections it becomes your personal safe haven. You finally work up the nerve to join a guild and find yourself stuck in the middle of a really familiar set of egos. At least you're having fun.

Tempura Kun| lalafell| white mage/omni-crafter| Yu (you)

A college student living in a haunted mansion their dead beat dad's "renovating." You are only really interested in crafting after being really burned out on hardcore raiding from your last MMO, but agree to sub for heals so Epel can replace the group's usual off tank who's taking a hiatus. That and Gloomurai agreed to let you decorate the FC house, how could you refuse?

Granny Smith| male roegadyn| dark knight| Epel Felmier

One of your friends from class. Mannon keeps mailing him fantasia and insisting he change his race but he's really attached to how muscular this lets him be. He really just wants to play for fun, but he's super competitive and is super eager to try out harder content to "prove how manly he is."

Gloomy Samurai| female miqo'te| samurai| Idia Shroud

The leader of the fc and the person who runs the discord. Extreeeeeemely blunt to the point of being a bit unpleasant and downright scary. You're pretty sure they only let you join to get access to more pictures of Grim and because Epel's friends with the main tank. Super funny for someone so terminally online, but you are beginning to suspect they just- don't have a life outside of gaming.

Jude Bellerose| male hyur| black mage| Riddle Rosehearts

Knows the mechanics for every single fight in game and is scarily efficient at his rotation. Also extremely inflexible and refuses to adjust for a n y o n e, but blames the wipe on everyone else because he knew the mechanics so why don't you? Pretty sure he broke a keyboard while trying to clear the last raid tier.

Vivat Rex| male miqo'te| reaper| Leona Kingscholar

Rex plays this game for triple triad like a true king and is only kept on the static for his consistent dps. Claims that he doesn't pay attention to the discord but he knows everything everyone says in there anyway and responds any time someone vaguely mentions him. Likes to mess with Jude and is not above causing a wipe to out dps him.

Snake Whisper| male au ra| dancer| Jamil Viper

He has every single non-crafter class leveled and knows their rotation. Refuses to play anything other than dancer because he hates people pulling logs and enjoys holding dance partner over the other dps's heads. Likes to post pictures of his cooking in the discord and has his spotify linked to his account. Surprisingly willing to swap recipes if you ask, provided you promise to not give them to Nautilus.

Mannon Du Luc| male elezen| paladin| Vil Schoenheit

Epel's online friend who he says he hates but you're pretty sure he admires a whole lot. He's playing this game for glam, his dresser is maxed out with almost every limited piece ever added. He has completed every single piece of extreme content for the glam without being carried and expects the same level of competence from his off tank. Super nice to you though, he always coms his healers.

Nautilus Noise| male viera| sage| Azul Ashengrotto

Raid leader who does the call outs with Snake Whisper. Claims to be irl friends with Gloomurai but neither of them ever talk about their personal lives so who knows. Has ff logs installed and will pull them to... critique the other static members. You are 99.9999% sure he's playing the market board with 8 retainers but lack concrete proof. At least you can make him shut up if you compliment him.

[averagejoesolomon]

Surprise! Here's a little bit of an early drop for y'all, because this is a weird time of year and I never know how much time I actually have. Please enjoy the kids, doing what they do best. If you're new here, you can read Full Circle from the start on Ao3. Enjoy!

Chapter Four

In total, Matt has seventeen passports. His first was acquired honestly in his senior year of high school, in preparation for a baseball invitational in Winnipeg. Since then, he’s collected eleven from the Office of Technical Services, four from a US-sympathizing forger out east, and two from one of Joe’s old contacts, about whom Matt doesn’t ask too many questions. 

Only two passports actually show Matthew Morgan printed as first and last name, and while he’d like to say he can account for both, the truth is he ain’t seen either in years. One is locked in a safe deposit box at the National Bank of Washington and the other is on file at Langley, ready to be duplicated and altered at a moment’s notice. They ought to be secure, but there’s no telling for sure. Not with the kind of enemies Matt’s made. Not with the kind of year he’s had.

There’s a moment, isolated against the cold white porcelain, when Matt thinks he ought to off himself quick before the Soviets get the chance to draw it out. But then he spits, and literally flushes that thought down the drain.

By the time he staggers back into the main room, he’s lost all of his breakfast. His mouth is coated with the bitter taste of coffee sent the wrong way over, and he suspects a sour egg yolk has taken up residence in his throat. His heart races. His nerves fray. He needs to call Joe, but the phone is still in pieces.

“Matthew.”

Amid the spiral of chaotic thoughts, her voice acts as the pole that draws his compass northward. The panic subsides just long enough to spot her beside the sink, a half-empty glass of water held out to him with her usual expectant expression. He obligingly crosses the room and takes a healthy swig. Swishes away the lingering tang. Swallows. With a sheepish, sideways glance at Rachel, he says, “I reckon this is the part of the mission where you ask how I could have let this happen.”

He can feel her eyes on him, heavy. “No,” she says, hip leaning into the countertop. She tries to look him in the eye, but Matt keeps his attention locked on the cool silver shine of the sink. His stomach still turns, and he ain’t confident in his ability to keep anything down. “This is the part where I tell you how we get it back.”

Rachel is a lot of things—strong, stubborn, loyal, fierce. Divinely smart and a viciously good spy. Beautiful, lovely, and passionate. But she is not an optimist, and she never has been. She usually leaves that sort of thing to Matt, letting him run his mouth about bright sides and silver linings while she focuses on the infinitely more critical work of seeing the world as it truly is, ugliness and all. He doesn’t want to think about how dire things must be if the two of them have switched roles. “Rachel,” he says, spitting once more into the sink. “It’s Moscow.”

In Matt’s head, this is an ironclad argument, but it’s shut down the moment Rachel reaches out to him. Two fingers pull at the far side of his face, right where his jaw meets his chin, as she turns his gaze toward her. All of his scattered, aimless nerves gravitate toward the single point of her touch, settling in unison against the resolve in her voice. “We’re going to get it back.”

And Rachel’s not an optimist, so maybe this ain’t a pleasantry. Maybe it’s just a fact.

There’s something especially striking about her, in the early morning glow of Moscow. Something about how the kitchen’s low, golden light settles against her skin, or catches in her tired eyes, or leaves feathered shadows along the soft curves of her brow, her nose, her lips. He can’t pull away from the feel of her, doesn’t want to anyway—and ain’t it something, that for all her might, she can pin him to a single spot with just two fingers?

“You weren’t afraid of this mission before your name was involved, and you shouldn’t be now,” she goes on. “You have to trust me.”

And he wants to. And he tries. But there are bugs in the wall, and curtains over the windows, and an ache in Matt’s gut that won’t go away, no matter how tender her touch. “No,” he says. “You have to trust me. The rules are different here.”

“I know.”

“You can’t always plan for every little thing that happens in the Soviet Union.”

“I know.”

When her hand falls, his jaw aches with a want that radiates down to the marrow in his bones. He has half a mind to reach out and hold her in place, hold her close, hold her steady. But the other, saner half remembers that Rachel could throw him straight over her shoulder if given a reason, so he reels his thoughts back into place. “I don’t see a way out of this,” he confesses. “Not one where we all walk out of the country alive.”

“You don’t have to,” she tells him. “That’s what you have me for.”

She says this with another one of her casual touches, leaving two dismissive pats at the center of his chest. His heart rate spikes in response, and maybe it’s more of that wanting, but maybe it’s more of that anger—that righteous and argumentative fury that always seems to spark between the two of them. It’s hard to tell the difference, when it comes to Rachel, and before he can identify one or the other, she’s already calling out to the room. “Grace, Abe,” she says, and the newlyweds round the kitchen cabinets, as though they haven’t been eavesdropping on every word. “Let’s talk logistics.”

Matt hangs his head, and tries again to get through. “Rachel.”

“Abe,” she starts instead. “You’ll be responsible for getting us where we need to be. I’ve secured entry into our perimeter, but we’ll need some of your charm to get us beyond the velvet ropes—basements, restricted hallways, dressing rooms, the works.”

“Roger,” Abe replies.

Matt tries again. “Rachel.”

“Grace,” she goes on. “It’s on you to get us out. You’ll need to think on your feet, so the only thing I want you focused on is the number of exits, and how close they are to each agent—including theirs.”

“Understood,” says Grace.

And tries again. “What am I, chopped liver? Rachel, listen—”

“Have a seat, Matthew,” she says, and there ain’t no mistaking the tone. Frigid, and callus, and professional, same as she’s always been. “If you’re going to pick apart every detail of the plan I’ve spent months developing, it might help to know what they are first.”

Abe glances at Grace. Grace glances back at Abe. And Matt does his damnedest to remember it’s rude to fight in front of company. 

To her credit, Rachel reads the room and shifts to a softer approach. “You’re too close to this one,” she insists. “You need a big picture view.”

Matt has been doing this long enough to know she’s right. The moment his name got involved was the moment he became an asset, rather than an agent, and he ought to be awfully grateful to have Langley’s best and brightest agent on his case. Maybe he ain’t in his right mind, and Rachel’s always had a better mind than him to begin with. Maybe she’s got clarity tucked away in her back pocket, and she just needs a chance to unfold all the questions and flatten all the creases. “Alright,” he cautions, taking his seat at Rachel’s table. “Walk me through it. Start at the beginning—where’s the trade happening?”

“The Bolshoi Theatre.”

Or maybe he’s surrounded by fools. “Christ almighty.”

This last part is supposed to stay in his head, but it slips through the cracks of a bad night’s sleep and lands in the shattered remains of a two-year-old fight. Just like that, they’re back in Baltimore, finishing what they started. “Problem?”

“It’s just that for a minute there, I thought you said the Bolshoi.”

“I did say the Bolshoi.”

“The Bolshoi Theatre,” he reiterates. “The same Bolshoi Theatre regularly visited by the Kremlin? The same Bolshoi Theatre used to bribe members of the KGB? Famously one of the most contentious venues in one of the most contentious cities in the world—that Bolshoi?”

Finally, he spots that familiar set in her jaw. “It’s not like I chose the place. That’s where the drop is scheduled.”

Righteous fury. “We’re not infiltrating the Bolshoi.”

A woman, scorned. “By all means, let’s call up our targets and let them know.”

“We can intercept before they get to the venue.”

“I don’t know where they’re going to be, before.”

“After, then.”

“Are you not hearing me?” She raises her voice, as if he needs the help. “I don’t know where they’re going to be before, or after, or two weeks from this Tuesday. I know when and where the drop is. That’s it.”

In this business, there are always words that go unsaid. Stories that go untold. It’s part of the gig. Matt lives and breathes the horrors of the Bolshoi, with its political undercurrent that swells with increasing power each passing day. Tickets exchanged for unthinkable deeds against mankind. Diplomats beaten in the shadowed corners of the cavernous backstage. Dancers with their legs snapped in two, at the hands of hired muscle. Matt’s informants have disappeared on the Bolshoi’s front steps, and he’s found men bleeding in the Bolshoi’s back alleys, but he can’t say any of that. Not without exposing the extent of his work. So instead, he settles on, “The Bolshoi is bad news,” and hopes that she hears all of the stories beneath it. “I mean it, Rachel. I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

She holds out a hand to the kitchen, emphasizing the crowded countertops, the covered cabinets, the mission notes stuck to the fridge. “Look around you,” she says. “Five months of planning, drafted and cleared by some of the best minds in the CIA. I’ve run through every possible scenario, I’ve weighed every possible risk. We’re not throwing that all away based on the gut reaction of a compromised agent.”

“I ain’t compromised.”

“You just hurled this morning’s breakfast into the toilet.”

“You need to listen to me on this.”

“It’s a good plan.”

“It ain’t about how good your plan is.”

“Then what is it about?”

That’s a damn good question. One that’s been inside his head for so long that it feels strange to hear it aloud, and out of Rachel's mouth to boot. It’s like their arguments never seem to land in the right spot, perpetually off-center from whatever fight they’re actually aiming for. The words are never right. The jabs are never straightforward. They always get caught up in these sideways tangents that never seem to loop around to things they’re actually angry about. 

So Matt tries to get to the heart of it. “I need you to trust that I know what I’m doing.” He’s not sure when he started standing again. Not sure when he closed the distance between his anger and hers. Something about their fights pulls him closer, closer, closer, until he’s certain she can hear him. She needs to hear him. “I need you to trust that I can take care of you, the same way you take care of me.”

And she wants to. And she tries. The effort of it twists into her features, truly nervous for the first time since he’s known her. She squirms against her stoic stance, fingers fidgeting in and out of fists while her face grows long. But her eyes—her eyes stay fixed on him. “I don’t need taking care of,” she says, but it’s another one of those off-center tangents. “I just need to get your passport back. And this is how we do it.”

Matt’s answering laugh ain’t born of humor, but of disbelief. It’s dry, and cold, and comes with the shake of his head. “Okay, look. Either I’m your go-to guy, or I’m not. Either I’m your Soviet expert, or I’m not.” He waits for her input, one way or another, but it doesn’t come. “You brought me here to advise, so let me advise. I need you to listen to me, please. Just listen to me, even if it’s only this one time. The Bolshoi is a bad move.”

When her eyes finally fall, she collects her nerves and centers herself once more. No more fidgets. No more squirming. Her voice is solid when she says, “I don’t have any other moves.”

“Of course you do. You’re Rachel Cameron.”

“I’m not a miracle worker. I don’t have any other moves.”

“Joe always says—”

“I don’t give a damn,” she snaps, “what Joe Solomon says.”

And it sure doesn’t get any more straightforward than that.

The usual defenses line up in Matt’s mind as easy as state capitals, ready to be rattled off in alphabetical order. Joe is a force for good. Joe is his friend. Joe is the key to bringing down bad people. Joe is worth all of the second chances he gets. But Matt doesn’t get any of them out before Rachel turns heel toward their shared bedroom. She slams the door with the strength of an agent and the practice of a spoiled heiress, and if there are any Soviets listening in on missed bugs, they surely flinch with the sheer force of the sound. Matt certainly does.

His head is spinning for entirely different reasons now, which is why he slumps back into a dining chair and buries his face in his hands. In Rachel’s absence, Matt’s waning irritation gives way to regret until it fills him from the bottom up, escaping in a long and languishing groan.

The Baxters look on, taking their single seat once more and wearing something like sympathy in their meager smiles. “Well,” Abe chirps, sipping his tea. “That could have gone better.”

Grace pushes some conciliatory bacon across the table toward Matt and, while the gesture is appreciated, the smell of it sends his stomach flipping. “To be fair,” she allows, “it could have gone much worse.”

Matt runs his hand through his hair until he finally looks as crazy as he feels. “I’m sorry about that,” he says. “We don’t—I mean. I’m just not sure how the two of us keep ending up here.”

Grace grants him a forgiving shrug. “Don’t beat yourself up too badly,” she tells him. “I left my ex in a Chevvron 2-32 without a parachute after we broke up. He had to convince the pilot to land in the Irish countryside, then had to fight off a field of goats and steal a tractor to reach our rendezvous point. The two of you are really quite civil, in comparison.”

While most partners might be concerned about a story like this, Abe doesn’t seem phased by it. In fact, Abe only seems to adore her more. “Don’t talk about your exes, darling,” he pleads, leaving a kiss atop her shoulder. “Makes me absolutely crazy.”

Grace turns to catch his lips in a kiss, before he can go too far. “Of course, love,” she reassures him. “It’s all about you from here on out.”

Afraid he might get pulled into another honeymoon moment against his will, Matt makes quick work of cutting in. “Exes?” he says. “Rachel and I aren’t exes.”

This grabs Grace’s attention, even as Abe continues to leave a trail of casual kisses down her arm. “What do you mean?” she says, on the edge of a laugh. “Of course you are.”

Matt just shakes his head. “Not even a little.”

Her smile drops. “I’m sorry.” Her words are filled with the kind of shock that doesn’t belong to spies. “I suppose I assumed… only that she was so hesitant to call, and the two of you really do fight like lovers.”

Matt’s not sure what that means—fight like lovers. His mama and pops never fought, at least not as far as he could tell. Moreover, Matt’s had girlfriends before, and most of those fights revolved around bonfires at Danny Fisher’s house, or attending the same college, or whatever else had felt important at seventeen. Matt and Rachel don’t fight like lovers. They fight like fire, in bright, blazing flashes that take up all the air in the room.

“Not any lovers I know,” he says. “She’s a tough nut to crack—I’m just not sure how I keep messing things up with her.”

The two of them exchange a look that says, in not so many words, that Matt is an idiot.

“But it seems like you do,” he prompts. “So maybe you could let a fella in on it?”

Matt hasn’t known the Baxters long, but the next ten seconds give him more insight into their relationship than any brief or case file ever could. Their conversation is wordless, as Grace turns to Abe with an imploring look. There’s some protest in his answering glance, but they flash through a silent argument in the time it takes Matt to blink, and finally, Abe relents. “Look, Matt,” he starts. “Rachel trusts you, so we trust you, but you’ve got no earthly idea how this looks on paper, do you?”

Matt’s a pretty smart guy, but he’s got a blind spot here, and he can feel it creeping along the edge of his vision. “Looks on paper?”

With a nod of encouragement from Grace, Abe approaches the subject from another angle. “We haven’t known one another for more than a few hours, and already I’ve gathered that you’re a US agent who spends a suspicious amount of time on Soviet soil, you know the ins-and-outs of the language, the culture, the spycraft, and you’ve got some allies that Rachel doesn’t much care for,” he says. “And with all the agents going missing, identities being sold, and now your name has shown up in the middle of a trade…”

Matt ain’t too fond of the direction this conversation is taking. “You don’t think that I—?”

“No,” Abe says firmly. “I don’t. But in this day and age, with the global environment we have, it’s not unheard of for western agents to shift their allegiance to the east. And you can bet if we noticed your red flags, then other people have, too. People with real power, on both sides of this war. And Rachel knows that.”

“So,” Matt offers, “she’s testing me?”

“So she’s saving your ass, darling.” Grace is more blunt than her husband, words falling out of her as though she can’t keep them back anymore. “She didn’t bring you on this op to advise on the Soviet Union. I’ve never met anyone less in need of advisement. She brought you on so that when Langley, or MI6, or the KGB drag you in for questioning, you can point to this op as proof of where your allegiances lie. So that you can prove, on the record, that you’re working against the Soviets.”

“And frankly, if I were you,” Abe adds, his tone gentler, “I might spend less time arguing about mission semantics, and more time doing whatever it is Rachel Cameron says, whenever she says to do it.”

This op seems to unravel more and more by the minute, and it is a testament to Rachel’s mind that she can keep track of each moving part when Matt can’t even spot them all. His thoughts drift back to the sight of her the night before, frazzled and small. Exhausted. It’s no wonder, with the way she’s gone and layered her life with his. She’s out of patience. She’s out of composure. He can hardly blame her.

So maybe he ought to be easier on her. Maybe he ought to be the easiest thing in her life.

An hour later, when Rachel cools off enough to rejoin them, Matt doesn't put up a fight about the Bolshoi, or the bugs, or anything else Rachel has surely thought of. He just sits, and listens, and listens, and listens.

[indigoleonis]

My safe place ⋆⭒˚｡⋆ (Part 1)

Leon x F!Reader (Word Count 2.4k +) Content Warning: 18+, Abuse, Gunshots, Choking, Offensive Language, fluff. Notes: Hi everyone reading this, I am new to writing and English is not my main language. Constructive criticism is always welcome, and if you notice any grammar mistakes feel free to message me about it so I can work on that for future projects. Reblogs and Likes are greatly appreciated! (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ)♡

Part 1 || Part 2 (Soon)

‘Shit shit shit’ Was going through my mind non-stop as I ran up the stairs of the DSO building. He is going to be so pissed that I am late again.

This was like the 10th time in my 3 month DSO career that I had to run up these stairs because I didn’t make it in time for a meeting. It sure was a good workout, but it was absolutely not worth it in the end. I knew how pissed Leon was going to be again, he was going to tell me how immature I was and that I had a team that relied on me. He would keep telling me how irresponsible it is to keep showing up late. And I knew all too well that he was right, but I just couldn’t help it.

I made it to the 3rd floor and opened the door to the meeting room. I sighed, the room was empty, except for Leon who was sitting in a chair with his feet upon the desk reading some documents. I know I was getting an earful again.

“The meeting ended a few minutes ago. How can you be so reckless? Do you need a nanny or something?” He said before getting up from his chair, sliding the documents across the table towards me. “I am so sorry Leon.”

Leon shakes his head, annoyed. “The fact that you are always late shows how much you care about the team’s success.” He walked past me. “It may not mean much to you, but we all work hard to achieve success on the same missions. It would be nice for once if you’d put in the same amount of effort as the rest. You need to stop being late all the time. Do you understand what I am saying?”

“Yes, I understand.” I said softly looking down at my feet, thinking about the reason I was late so often.

He looks at me, his face softens and he sighs.

“I’m sorry, I don’t want to be harsh on you. I know you’re new on the job, but you need to take this seriously, the team needs to rely on you from time to time, we shouldn’t have to always be on alert for you because you might arrive whenever you feel like it, understand?”

“I know Leon, I understand, I really do.” I knew damn well that if it wasn’t for my controlling boyfriend I wouldn’t have been late every single time. “I know you understand.” He replies as he leans against the wall with his arms crossed.

“Do you have a boyfriend? How long have you been together?” He asks, curious, his body language indicates that he’s listening attentively. I looked up at him, my eyes widened and I gave him a questioning look. I never talked about my personal life with my co-workers, I never once mentioned that I had a boyfriend or lived with someone. I was taken aback by his question, not knowing whether he was suspecting anything or if he was trying to flirt with me. Leon was at least 10 years older than me, there was no way he was romantically interested in me right? But on the other hand, he wasn’t as mad as usual when I was late today. “Oh uh, yeah. I have a boyfriend, it’s been 2 years almost actually.” “Oh, it’s pretty serious then. He must be taking good care of you.” Leon leans closer and tries to gauge my face. “I’m just a little curious, that’s all.” He continues.

“Well, I’m sure he does. I mean, 2 years is a long time. What’s he like to you? He must make you really happy to stay so long in a relationship with him.” Leon asks, with a slightly skeptical tone, he looks like he’s trying to fish some kind of information from me.

I slightly panicked, he knew something was up and I had no idea how he was suspecting anything. “Oh it’s been great so far!” I lied, giving him a soft smile and lifted up my hand to scratch my neck, hoping I could deceive him.

Leon’s eyes followed the movement of my hand and he smiles at me. “Your boyfriend must be a very lucky guy, dating a beautiful woman like yourself. I hope he knows that.”

I was stunned by his sudden comment. He called me beautiful? He left me confused again, was he trying to get information out of me, or was he actually flirting with me the entire time? Leon’s smile grows wider as he sees my reaction. “Of course you are. I am just stating a fact. But now I am curious. What’s wrong with your boyfriend? Why does he make you feel like you need to hide things and lie to cover it?”

Great, he knew I was lying. “It’s nothing.” I lied again, looking down at the floor. I got a look from Leon again, his smile slowly fades and he senses that I could be lying. He comes closer to me and speaks very quietly, in a gentle tone. “Is he hurting you?”

I looked up at Leon, who was suddenly standing in front of me. He softly placed a hand on my shoulder to comfort me, and assure me it was fine to tell him the truth. “He is very protective…” I whispered softly. He was too protective, he controlled me, made sure he knew where I was all the time and with who I was. If he didn’t like it he would keep me at home, forbid me to even leave the house.

“Protective or controlling?” He asks, as he grabs my other arm, trying to get me to look at him. “Has he ever hit you? Has he ever stopped you from hanging out with your friends if you didn’t tell him where you were going?” He asks, gently brushing my hair out of my face. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. I kept looking at the floor, not wanting to let Leon see me on the verge of tears.

His voice softens as he sees some tears rolling down my cheeks. “Come on, if I’m right, you need to tell someone about it. I am here for you. You don’t have to carry all of this by yourself.” His tone becoming more and more comforting and gentle. “Do you really feel you can’t tell any of your friends or co-workers because of him?”

I didn’t look or answered Leon. I rolled up my sleeves, which were covered in bruises. I lifted my shirt up to my bra to show him even more bruises. The tears now rolling down my cheeks faster. “Did he do this to you?” He asks quietly as he wrapped his arms around me. He was surprised by the amount of bruises he had seen, and I didn’t even show half my body yet. “Yeah.” I whisper between sobs, unable to say anything else.

“I’ll be here for you, he won’t hurt you again. If you ever want to run away from him, I can take you somewhere else, I can keep you safe.” He looks straight into my eyes. “Is that what you want? To be safe with me?” I looked at Leon confused, not understanding what he meant. “Go with you? Leon, what do you mean?” His face turns a bit red as he realizes what he might have sounded like. “I meant that I would take you away from him. So you won’t have to be afraid of him, or worry about him hurting you. And.. You could live with me.” He said with a concerned face, wiping some tears off of my face. “Do you want that?” He asks again.

I took a step back and pushed his hands away from me. “What is wrong with you?” I said angry. “I told you about my boyfriend, how he abuses me and you immediately take this as an opportunity to get me to sleep with you? You’re not any better than him Leon!”

Leon looks at me surprised, and then starts to laugh a little. “Sorry, sorry, I swear it’s not like that. Yes you’re beautiful, but I won’t force myself on you like that.” He says with a slight chuckle. “This isn’t funny Leon! I thought I could trust you…” Leon smiles and shakes his head. “No, no, don’t take this the wrong way! I should apologize, I should have phrased it better. Don’t be mad now. I was just trying to get you to smile a little by calling you beautiful.” He took a step closer to me. “I am not smiling for you old man.” I said infuriated and walked out of the room, tears rolling down my face again.

I left him in that room and made my way outside, I was desperately in need of some fresh air. It was late already, the sun had set and there was barely any traffic. I looked at my phone and seeing the messages my boyfriend had sent me. ‘You better come home soon, I am hungry. If I have to make my own dinner you’ll be in big trouble.’ I rolled my eyes and put my phone back into my pocket.

After walking for a few minutes I took a seat on a bench. My boyfriend had called me several times, he was definitely mad because I had read his messages but just left him on read. Knowing I was already going to be in trouble once I get home, I decided to ignore his phone calls as well. I looked up at the sky, closing my eyes and wished I could just be away from everyone and everything.

A soft voice comes from behind me calling my name. “Are you okay? The voice said, worried at the way I looked and my apparent sadness. The person sits next to me, and places their hand on my back to try and comfort me. “Leon, please..” I sighed. He leans his body towards me, and hugs me tight. “Come here, you’re safe, don’t worry. I’ll help you, I want you to be happy.” I faced him. “Why did you follow me?” He brushed my hair out of my face again. “I couldn’t just let you run off like that. I wouldn’t forgive myself if something were to happen to you.” He said while gently tucking my hair behind my ear. I blushed a little by feeling his cold fingers against my face. “Leon?” I paused for a second and looked into his blue eyes. “How did you know?” I asked him. “Know what?” He looked at me puzzled. “About my boyfriend.” He gave a light chuckle. “I noticed your bruises on your arms for the first time after our first mission in Eastern-Europe. I didn’t really think anything of it, I initially thought you just ran into some bad guy after we got separated in the sewers. I got suspicious after your bruises didn’t seem to heal even though it was weeks since we had returned. You also wore long sleeved shirts or hoodies a lot, even when it felt like the earth was on fire last summer.” He smiled a little. “It wasn’t until last weekend that my suspicions were confirmed. I was at the local pub and noticed you somewhere in the back. You were arguing with your boyfriend weren’t you? He grabbed both your wrists and dragged you outside not much later.” He said visibly angry. “I am sorry, I should have helped you. I should have walked out after you guys and helped you.” He sounded defeated. “I’ve seen you handle the bad guys on our missions so I thought you would be fine. I am really sorry.” Leon gave me an apologizing look. “It’s okay Leon, you don’t always know what’s going on behind closed doors. No matter how strong one person might be, they might just be a weak puddle of mud once they get home.” I joked trying to lighten the mood. “Thank you for caring about me though, it feels nice being able to talk about it with someone. I really appreciate your concern Leon.” I admitted, letting out a sigh of relief. I stood up from the bench we were sitting on and reached out my arms towards Leon. He gave me a smile and stood up, he wrapped his arms around me tightly. “If there is anything I can do to help, please let me know.” He said before letting me go. “Thanks Leon, I should probably go home now.” I said with a nervous tone. “I should break up with him, but I need to do this myself.” Leon nodded. “Are you sure you will be fine? I can walk with you if you want, and wait at your house a bit until I know you’ll be safe.” I assured Leon I was going to be alright and that I would see him tomorrow again. “Don’t follow me again!” I said loudly while making my way home, getting further from Leon.

I was on my way for a good 10 minutes, all I had to was cross through the park. The park always freaked me out a bit, there were no lights so it was extremely dark. Sometimes I had to stop walking to look around and make sure I wasn’t going off into the direction of the lake. My phone started buzzing, I took it out of my pocket only to see it was my boyfriend, again. “So, you’re going to ignore me again huh?” I stood still in shock, I looked around me but before I could see where he was I could feel his hands grabbing me around my neck. “Answer me bitch!” He yelled, tightening his hands making it hard to breath. “L- Let me g- go.” I tried to scream but his hands made it impossible. Tears were streaming down my face, my hands grabbed his arms but he was too strong for me. “No one is going to help you princess, if you would’ve answered my text we wouldn’t be here right now. It’s your own fucking fault and I am making you pay for it.” My lips were starting to feel numb, I gasped for air but he just tightened his grip more when he saw me struggling. It didn’t take much longer before everything turned black. I heard a loud bang, similar to that of a gunshot right before I dropped on the ground.

[the-official-account]

Is it just me, or does lesbian fandom have a problem?

My name is Edil. I've been a medium-sized name in several small fandoms, especially podcast fandoms. I am also a women appreciator, and enjoy media that centers on women. I'm going to mostly be talking about my experiences in two fandoms: The Strange Case Of Starship Iris and Pasithea Powder, both podcasts with central wlw ships, though I've also seen these same issues in Goncharov (1973) of all places.

When I go into fandom I go hard. My brain, which is very autistic, breaks down information of small details for fun. It's the reason why I wrote a dwarnian (TSCOSI's fictional alien language) dictionary for the podcast. The reason why I have a massive notes document on all of Pasithea's season one and the reason the wiki...looks and reads like that. It isn't owned by me, but most of the formatting, fonts, content: yours truly.

And I'm proud of these projects, which took time and effort and skill building to do! But I haven't finished or caught up with either of these podcasts, and that's because the online spaces that center around them have been overwhelmingly hostile.

I have a strong emotional connection to this issue — of whether or not sapphic fandoms tend to be more hostile to diversity, especially race and nuerodivergance — so I can't make a distinct analysis, not without more distance and more information. That's part of why I am making this post.

Mods and members of the TSCOSI discord circa 2020 will know me, and know why I left. That being a series of unwarranted criticisms and bad faith readings that left me with anxiety even interacting with the fandom I loved.

I am probably a lot less known in the Pasithea fandom, because I wrote fewer fics for it and left more quickly. After TSCOSI, I recognized resentment faster. But the Pasithea notes document that I've posted here before and the wiki, three fics, fan art and that one comic that's still to this day the only comic I've drawn: me.

This is not a callout post, not for individuals or for groups, and I don't have screenshots. I am only trying to open a discussion.

See, the pattern that I am seeing is that fandom spaces centering on wlw ships attract fans who are wlw. And while nothing is inherently wrong with that, issues in the lesbian community start to become very obvious.

Firstly, the lack of diversity in sexuality among most of the fan base (As I suspect bi and gay people have largely more popular media that attracts them, and lesbians have to dig deeper for smaller spaces like these podcast) starts to feed this sense of possession among fans. As if there is a correct, normal, or standard way to be sapphic. A set of rules stating that anyone who doesn't obey it hates lesbians.

From Pasithea, I got this in comments about how I was drawing the characters "ugly" (Jane is canonically fat and has a scar, which I made very visible...because I wanted to. I gave her strong Hispanic features because it appealed to me. Sophie is butch, and canonically has or had a buzz cut. Which is what I drew. — The "appearance" section of the wiki? Yup. I wrote that.)

These comments, which were themselves problematic, came from a place of implying I was lesbiphobic for drawing these wlw as "ugly". When in fact, I was drawing the type of characters that would appeal the most to me, and hopefully to others like me.

These expectations of skinny, eurocentric appearing, usually feminine characters... Well it reflects a lot of issues with TERF-y feminism and lesbianism at large. Lesbianism on the internet has an issue with gender essentialism that isn't universal but is incredibly worrying. And when WOC are often masculinized because of their non-white features, that transphobia becomes anti-butchness (or strict standards of butchness) and racism.

While TSCOSI fans were more receptive to my designs, I was drawing in a less realistic style where "ugly" was less of an issue — and, to be frank, The main ship being Southeast and South Asian made it hard to draw them "ugly" from a eurocentric perspective. Realism there would just be...exotic, I guess.

However, with TSCOSI fans there was still a sense of possession around how these characters were interpreted, especially in headcannons, that lead to me deleting more than I posted as time went on. Some of those were genuine issues on my part ("what if the Jewish guy was a vampire in a au haha!" I said. Then went to bed, woke up, googled it, and went "NOPE! NOPE!!! SORRY.") Others were just unnecessary, such as comments on how silly head cannons were "unrealistic", and how I should write more cannon compliant work, rather than what I was doing for fun.

Ultimately these are the ONLY things that made me stop listening to these podcasts. The ONLY reason I put down the projects I poured consecutive hyperfixate weeks into. Part of me thinks it was this enthusiasm in the first place that was the biggest threat others reacted to in how I spoke and acted.

For instance, in trying to write for both the TSCOSI and Pasithea wikis, I had folks try to change my methods of research and writing to a style that worked best for them. When I said they were welcome to work that way, there was no offers to assist. And communication with those who had established work was either non-existent or hostile. I've had people question if my passion projects were necessary, berate me for meaningless mistakes, and treat what could be fun collaborative work like a pissing contest. For TSCOSI, none of this occurred on the wiki, and mostly around documents I owned for my own note taking. Even then, the hostility of Wikipedia culture is an unnecessary and hurtful thing to bring into fandom wiki culture.

The TSCOSI people went on to make a wonderful wiki that I deeply admire, but I still wish I could have been part of that project in its infancy, instead of being pushed away. (I may have made the navigation system if I remember correctly, but I'm not certain. So this is not to say I was not allowed any input whatsoever.)

I love sapphic media, it's my bread, butter, pride, joy, and favorite past time. But time and time again I have found far safer social spaces for media that centers around gay men, even if it isn't my personal first choice.

As a non-white, non-allistic, non-lesbian, not-skinny fan...I have concerns.

I know you all want sapphic media to get more attention. I want that too. But unless you start actively searching for and calling out bigotry in those spaces, it absolutely cannot and will not happen. So much of fandom is powered by autistic people with time on their hands, and I want there to be space for people like me. Who get TOO excited, TOO far from cannon, TOO analytical about race and class and fatphobia and whatever else.

Sapphic media obviously has issues reaching fans that aren't the fault it's its current audience. But the good thing about being part of or close to a problem, is having the power to make incredible, effective change.

I refuse to leave these podcasts behind, I love them more than anything, and the projects I got out of them are still my beloved brain children (The alien calligraphy from the random writing system I made for dwarnian is still up on my wall. "It is what. It IS what, keeps us from the abyss.") I refuse to be shoved aside my racist fans and random people who assume they can act rudely to strangers because they treated characters or lore differently. I refuse to be sidelined from conversations just cause I can act weird.

But I also refuse to spend so much of my beloved labor on people who turn up their noses and belittle it.

This all has had a lasting effect on how I interact with fandom, a legitimate fear-responce to the idea of trying to engage deeply with women-centered podcasts. Something I'm trying to unlearn and overcome.

So. There's my explanation of why I don't do tscosi anymore, which I mentioned on the minibang I'd eventually follow up on. And a criticism of sapphic fandom which, I'll be real, I have a few more essays worth of commentary about, and it's also another expression of how I stare longingly at Pasithea every time it comes up on my dash.

But, most importantly, this is my question of whether anyone else has found themselves in a similar place. If it's a trend or an anecdote.

If you have thoughts, please reblog with them. I'd love to know what you have to say.