#mAyBe ThEy CouLd Do WiTh LeSs FeEdiNg
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me when winter is almost here and i have an entire village to feed
#mAyBe ThEy CouLd Do WiTh LeSs FeEdiNg#i dont care if you arent laughing because i am#this isnt funny but im almost passed out on the floor rn#httyd#how to train your dragon#stoick the vast#httyd memes#httyd funny
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Ignore this it’s just a tag rant
#*screams because I have the coolest story I want to tell for my channel but it’ll never got more than 200 views*#(which feels like it’s because I’m a girl and female VA channels don’t have as big of an audience)#(like the ONLY way I manage to break 300+ views are algorithm feeding videos)#(which are kinda boring)#like as much as I love werewolves I’d Really like to do my cosmic suspense#I’m sorry Escaped but your advice of ‘just make what you want and an audience will find you’ is So Wrong#(again. could just be because I’m a girl)#I have been doing this for Two Years and without feeding the algorithm I’d probably have less than 300 subscribers#if I only made stories that I wanted to make my channel never would have grown at all#I want my Welcome to the Forest series to be a staple of the channel#but the fact of the matter remains that barely anyone watched the first one#it’s a little too ‘unique’ maybe#I want to collab with a bigger name VA as an influential side character#but what’s the point when no one will watch it?
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blorbos in tha phone
#FIRST EVER DIGITAL DOODLE GUYS I DID IT WOOP WOOP#airbrush my beloved#feels like watercolour and that makes me a lil giddy#anyways this was mostly retraced off of a template (?) i JUST downloaded ibis and wanted to get to know the pens#ill eventually get back to drawing once i figure out layers :sob:#i did this so spontaneously but i realize i have a lot of art moots. maybe too many#i have so many ideas to doodle but no skills no money to commission others no idea where to start no bitches no hoes no life#if time is nice to me i may begin a series of impersonating my fav tumblr artists' styles bc im only good at copying *wiggles brow*#if not be prepared for me to give up on re-learning how to draw people and go back to doodling cars and buildings#hmmmmm perhaps ill draw the bsd street racer au that's been feeding off of my braincells#DIGITAL DRAWING IS A LOT LESS SCARY THAN IT WAS LAST TIME I TRIED IT#maybe because i was like. 12 when i last tried digital. but shh#my brain draws clear images i just wish my hands could follow#*places stylus between eyebrows and squints aggressively then draws with mind* problem solved fr#OMG IM SO SAD THE REFERENCE WAS FOR ONLY 4 PEOPLE most bsd cliques come in 5s#was gonna do doa or hd then my brain went nu uh if someone wants i can do them tho#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bsd art#art(?)#bsd flags
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Might do something crazy, and take the whole month off posting to create art. 🤔 I need a bigger deadline to refocus my goals.
#art stuff#I wanna do more thoughtful art#less fast paced#as much as I want to get faster - I feel I am not completely happy with the results. So this will be the goal of this month#also I am so bad - this is like the only site I actually update with news lmao#but also it's kinda the only site where people seem to give a shit? idk#lots of daily posting on the other places - and besides my lovely two friends - there's like no feed back#which is a bummer#here people actually see stuff - and share?#it's nice#there's also the additional pivoting towards making more portfolio worthy art#and im starting to think maybe I dont give a shit about character deisgn all THAT much#because I sadly could not get back into the deviantart scape#I feel so bad for leaving all those people's requests#I might still do some but my brain is always a little iffy
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george did not write “if i were a woman id be cersei” and vice versa as correct statements imo. while i do believe that their respective trials that they faced as a result of their gender had grave effects on them as people and shaped them into much of what they are, i still think there are fundamental differences in nature. like this is demonstrated by how differently they acted as little children (treatment of tyrion, murder of melara, etc). i think they have some core distinctions. especially with what they personally desire the most above all else and their differing levels of empathy. this was no doubt influenced by their experiences and societal roles as well but i do still think it is part of their nature too. they have some very interesting and important similarities, but they are by no means the exact same only distinguished by experiences. i think it is always a mix of nature and nurturer, like your experiences can suppress or intensify certain qualities that you have, for better or worse. they have agency. they responded to their trauma in their own way. the twins not being the same person on a fundamental level is meant to be subversive. put in opposite positions i do not think we would have the exact same people just switched. like this feels like it is emphasized in the text to me
#like even when jaime says that line it feels ironic#he says hed make them kill him#but cersei did in fact go thru that#and she did not make them kill her#once again just random twitter thread was put on my feed#dont even disagree w some of it#just believe this part is not very correct#i always wondered if they were opposite genders they might have turned out to be more well adjusted#maybe yes maybe not we cant know for sure it depends on the circumstances#i do think it seems to allign w their core desires more and could end up being less devastating#u can argue how that core desire really developed in cersei to begin with#but still i think she is just an inherently more ambitious person than jaime in this regard#like maybe cers would have a healthier relationship w power if she had more access to it#but then again like both are constructs that could destroy them anyway#there is an inherent violence present in both that could destroy a person#like it did the both of them in canon#so that might happen again but just in different ways#and if we r gonna get into the biology of it (not that it matters its not like asoiaf canon is good at this shhshs) they are fraternal twins#same as regular siblings
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microdosing on cannibalizing my own flesh by reading Richard Silken poems. and falling in love
#this post was brought to you by kaz. ty for the organposting kaz#cannibalism#the triangle of cannibalism#got to have a delightful car ride w#cosmic#and his mom this weekend where we talked about technology and volleyball and poetry#and i got to lose my mind about ''these our bodies possessed by light/tell me we'll never get used to it'' which still rips my guts out#and feeds them to me. to this day. every time i read those lines i become a little more unraveled. my god#richard you minx. i could hug you#richard siken#snowswords#oh yeah and the inherent destruction of building a partnership. its good destruction. you gotta figure out how to be part of a whole#that's life in general too. i think doing romance with people really puts a microscope on the process. at least for me.#like damn being with cosmic means i have less freedom to up and do whatever i want. i can still do almost anything i want but now it's#important to give him a heads up. or maybe he'd like to do this too i should wait for him. or there's something he'd like to do that#im invited along for!! i'll do the original thing i wanted to do another time so we can do this now#yknow? yeah. im destroying snow (singular) to create snow (member of duo). and that helps me remember ive never really been a singular enti#this is its own post isnt it. ok wait#Richard silken#sigh spelled his name wrong the first time my bad
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guys i am slash gen so happy for grefgor and i am actually ELATED that arthur looks weird now
#my post#the suckening spoilers#I COULD NOT FOR THE LIFE OF ME FIGURE OUT HOW TO DRAW ARTHUR#BUT A CREATURE?? A KINDA FUCKED UP LOOKING GUY??? I CAN DO THAT!!!!!#he is 1000 times more beautiful to me#like from shrek and he is fiona#and grefgor........ i am so happy for him. having a life outside of serving his princes#WHEN HE TOLD THEM NO. THAT THEY COULD NOT FEED OFF OF HAZEL#ARE WE SKIPPING OVER THAT. THATS SO IMPORTANT HE TOLD THEM *NO*#yknow i think he loves her so much bcus shes so like. 'yeah. whatever.' yknow??#shes not telling him what to do or what to think. shes barely doing that for herself tbh#shes so chill i love hazel#um i mean proposing after less than a month of knowing eachother is kinda crazy and she also does NOT know hes a vampire and i feel like#they should maybe work that out first. but im sooooo happy i was kinda thinking hedve just spent the month standing there waiting for them#to come back. or hed be dead. but hes LIVING HIS LIFE :DDD#also seeing people upset that shilo x grefgor isnt gonna be canon ToT GIRL SHILOS ARO????#LIKE?? AT EDWARD TWILIGHTS HOUSE W THE LEVEL 1 BLOOD BOND? GRIZZLY WAS LIKE 'OH CMON NO ROMANTIC FEELINGS AT ALL' AND BIZLY WENT 'NO HES NO#REALLY CAPABLE OF THAT'#LIKE ITS CANON <3 PEACE AND LOVE AND LIGHT <333#THIS IS ALL I HAD TO SAY GOODBYE
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Classic Who explores ideas, New Who explores morals
classic who is like 'i see this trend, lets explore what might happen if that trend continues and let the audience figure out what it's talking about and come to their own conclusions.'
new who is like 'this trend is BAD and i'm going to PREACH A SPEECH about why it's going to RUIN EVERYTHING' and it's so much more exhausting
#wren rambles#doctor who#this brought on by me watching orphan 55#which had SUCH a fun concept#and then absolutely FACEPLANTED with the doctor moralizing at the end#like yes doctor who has ALWAYS explored topical and political issues#but never is there a definitive I Am Telling You This Is Right message#whereas now I just had to sit here and watch 13 preaching at me?#ughghg#explore the idea but don't shove it down my throat#classic who had an episode (Ice Warriors) exploring climate change as one aspect of the story#talking about how all the plants were removed and that messed with the atmosphere etc.#but that was just a SMALL PART of the whole episode and it was never outright condemned (it was made clear it was BAD and the root problems#but that was never the BIG ISSUE the Doctor Lectured His Companions about) (not that victoria or jamie could do anything lol)#plus this feeds into my issues with 13's run (which started during 12's somewhat but less so)#where the Doctor is painted as the Narratively Right one#where when she says something that's what the narrative wants you to BELIEVE#which coming from Two and Three's run is WILD#because Two is chaotic and murderous when he thinks he's right#and he's manipulative and deceptive at times#and Three is selfish and pouty and rude#and don't get me wrong Thirteen has her issues and I lvoe them#HOWEVER. she's pretty much always RIGHT she's the Word Of God when it comes to moral things#and this more than anything is my biggest issues with Modern Who#mostly 12 and 13's eras#so i hope we move out of that somewhat in the new era but i'm not super holding up hopes (especially after star beast)#maybe one day i'll write a proper full article about it but GOSH#i don't watch this show to be preached at. I watch it for a fun/tragic scifi romp and also to see interesting ideas explored#and reflect the climate of the world and how society influences media#explore the idea of climate change turning the world into a post apocalypse! that's such a fun idea and topical!
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honestly the only thing that worries me about getting sex reassignment surgeries is the fact that i dont know anyone who could be here to bathe and help me eat and watch over me and take care of the cats, etc while i recover from them
#the only one i could think of is maybe my dad but i dont know how long for#i would have to like do more research about this stuff#but even for just like ... getting my wisdom teeth pulled .. i didnt have anyone who could drive me there and back and it was 2 minutes awa#i couldnt walk home after the surgery because i would have to cross two highways walking. like....#and i sadly like .. BEGGED the office staff like ''can anyone just .. drop me off after the surgery i live a spit away from you''#and they were like ''... you KNOW this is unprecedented right .. you have nobody who can drive you ..? we never had this happen before#and that the point was so that someone could watch over me a little bit while i was recovering and high from the pain medicine#and to help feed me and stuff and get me soft food#i had to beg my roommate who i had an active falling out with to like. help me a little. and they did and drove me. but not really help#i think about moving away from TX because of this but the truth is i dont really have this kind of thing anywhere i would move to#if anything i would have LESS people where ever i moved to. and to get situated again. find another job. find another doctor. another vet.#something i still think about was i ordered groceries while i was recovering from oral surgery because .. i couldnt drive and shop for them#and the person delivering them WAITED for me to open the door to confirm yes im getting them#(i wrote in the note like ''thank you im recovering from oral surgery dont replace items with things with seeds in them#or anything more acidic replacement item. i cant have it'')#and they looked so sad looking at me like my face swollen answering the door ''do you need me to help you carry them up...''#but i did say no and that i could bring them upstairs but thank you. but it was a kind thing i still think about. i somtimes wish i said ye#and they waited for me. they waited for me to come answer the door and verify yes i got them and did i need help with them.#they looked so sad looking at me. i wonder what i looked like
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the cup of coffee i ask my father to make never tastes quite like the one he made for me when i couldn't walk from the pain
#does he do it because he loves me or does he do it because i asked? can it be both? can it be neither?#does the sigh he lets out when i tell him he makes it better than i do sound like irritation?#will i ever be able to tell without watching his face so carefully that he can feel me staring?#what happened to that brave little girl that he called his daughter? where did she go?#i killed her some ten years ago i think. when i couldnt handle being me anymore and even my closest friends thought i was too much.#i think she would cry if she knew who i was now.#or maybe she wouldnt.#maybe she would smile a little bit wrong like she always does and ask me if i still play minecraft (i do)#maybe she would laugh when i told her i wasnt a girl and say “me neither” with the confidence only she could have#maybe she would draw a dragon for me and add a little curl at the top of its head to represent mine.#maybe her hands would shake a little too much when i asked her if she knew how much her parents loved her.#i dont think she did back then. i dont think she knew.#it doesnt make it okay. what happened to her couldnt be excused or pardoned just by saying they loved her.#but maybe it would sting less if she knew it wasn't out of hate.#my father gets out of bed at 8 every morning to feed the dogs because i cant.#does he do it because he loves me? or because he has to?#my mother takes off of work to take me to my doctor's appointments.#does she do it because she loves me? or because she has to?#my sister chipped in on the cost of my birthday present.#did she do it because she loves me? or because she has to?#i thought i was so mature when i was 12 years old. now that i'm the age i lied and said i was when i was 12 i have never felt so small.#at age 10 i thought i wouldnt make it past 13. and now i dont know what to do with my life.#vanilla if you see this somehow. if you find this and you think “ah. theres my girl. hello caroline.” i hope you're in a good place in life#i hope your streaming career goes well.#i hope you graduated and that you got into whatever thing you wanted.#i hope you forgive yourself. because god knows i will never forgive you.#i was just a kid. why? why trinity?#i had to tell my therapist that he was the first one to ever know about the full extent of what you did to me.#i hope you can live with what you've done. i still can't.#i dont think ill ever forget what alex said about me.
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i need to get an overdraft set up so i can afford more alcohol. I cant cope with being awake or having emotions or being aware lmfao
#maybe I could be more productive with this state of mind tho#its hard to make meaningful steps when youre drunk#like time passes and things get progressively worse but at least if youre sober in pain you can do research#i need to find out how to build a bomb so I can walk into the woods and feed the birds my scrambled egg brains#cant be that bad right like its quick and painless then when people find the bones and identify you its like. less traumatic for them#than having to cut down a corpse or clean up a shotgun suicide#plus shotguns are expensive af#I need more alcohol#I ran out of drugs#I had some xanax and pregabalin but they make me wanna die even more lmao#i have loads of quetiapine and the gp wont give me anything except more quetiapine#but i hate it#it makes me wanna walk into a train and i gain 3 pounds a week#i want lurasidone#like camus said ig#should i kms or have a coffee? but then you just . feel shit but quickly TM#whatever#gp wont give me more of the fucking lamotrigine because i'm apparently already on a really high dose but i'm definitely fucking not#whatever we;re all gonna be dead soon right? who cares#shes convinced i'm manic or something#im like#oBVIOUSLY FUICKING NOT#I jsut slept for 30 fucking hours|!!!!
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i have my grips with the anime but there’s really some scenes it completely nailed (like Itaru’s gamer reveal), and when i reach those specific scene in the VN i really can’t stop thinking about just how good the anime was for those scenes in particular.
Case in point right now: the moment they’re trying to give out flyers for RomeJuli in the street and no one is stopping, so Masumi ends up, unprompted, to act out one of the scene as to bring attention to it.
i’ve rewatched the anime so many times it actually surprised me how abrupt the transition from Flyers to “Masumi is acting” is, it’s nice but, man.
The fact the anime really shows when it clicks for Masumi that it would work, then having him, in silence, give his flyers away so he can then focus on acting, and seeing Izumi and Sakuya look at him, perplexed, before he starts acting and they catch on on what he’s doing, makes it flow so much better
A3 is a VN that really utilize the VN format extremely well, so it’s not especially a tackle on the VN itself, and there’s really a few things i think the anime did considerably worse, but this scene? kind of justify the anime’s existence for a bit because just remembering it gives me chill.
#one of the reason the spring chapter is probably the best adapted one in anime form#more than just 'it's shorter than the rest so they had less to cut'#is that the few things they did cut i did see myself go yeah yknow what that's a fine exclusion#i have much more problems with what they cut later on but in spring for the most part it's good decisions#(except like. removing Tsuzuru's RomeJuli's backstory explaination)#and in the end it's mostly because. All the changes to Spring? Specifically manage to give a better image of Masumi.#Like i do like to feed on the crumbs of Masumi-not-being-obsessed-with-Izumi we get#and we do get a lot of them actually!! at least in the main chap#(also like when it sinks him to him that Saku has Trauma:tm: and how he does talk it out with Citron in a caring manner)#but a lot of times bc of awkward pacing just like this one it doesn't really hit as well as it could#and i think it impacts how much harder it is to appreciate Massu#honestly the anime did a lot of work in trying to pace out Massu's storybeats so that they have a better moment to shine#while also giving him a couple more scenes like being excited of rehearsing with Saku that reflects well on his character#like disclaimers in the tags but while i'm perhaps more 'meh' on the 'liking him still' scale with massu#i'm also team 'i can't stand his izumi's obsession it drives me insane'#but man i do think the crumbs are tasty and maybe i'm just making up a new chara in my head out of them#but i'll still care for them damnit!!! i'm not going to let this decision reflect on a son!!!#but i was realizing a few anime rewatch ago that i didn't mind Massu as much in the anime as he annoyed me in the VN#and now that i'm rereading the VN i think i'm getting why re: pacing#it's interesting tbh#ichablogging a3
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STOP DOING THIS IN INJURY FICS!!
Bleeding:
Blood is warm. if blood is cold, you’re really fucking feverish or the person is dead. it’s only sticky after it coagulates.
It smells! like iron, obv, but very metallic. heavy blood loss has a really potent smell, someone will notice.
Unless in a state of shock or fight-flight mode, a character will know they’re bleeding. stop with the ‘i didn’t even feel it’ yeah you did. drowsiness, confusion, pale complexion, nausea, clumsiness, and memory loss are symptoms to include.
blood flow ebbs. sometimes it’s really gushin’, other times it’s a trickle. could be the same wound at different points.
it’s slow. use this to your advantage! more sad writer times hehehe.
Stab wounds:
I have been mildly impaled with rebar on an occasion, so let me explain from experience. being stabbed is bizarre af. your body is soft. you can squish it, feel it jiggle when you move. whatever just stabbed you? not jiggly. it feels stiff and numb after the pain fades. often, stab wounds lead to nerve damage. hands, arms, feet, neck, all have more motor nerve clusters than the torso. fingers may go numb or useless if a tendon is nicked.
also, bleeding takes FOREVER to stop, as mentioned above.
if the wound has an exit wound, like a bullet clean through or a spear through the whole limb, DONT REMOVE THE OBJECT. character will die. leave it, bandage around it. could be a good opportunity for some touchy touchy :)
whump writers - good opportunity for caretaker angst and fluff w/ trying to manhandle whumpee into a good position to access both sites
Concussion:
despite the amnesia and confusion, people ain’t that articulate. even if they’re mumbling about how much they love (person) - if that’s ur trope - or a secret, it’s gonna make no sense. garbled nonsense, no full sentences, just a coupla words here and there.
if the concussion is mild, they’re gonna feel fine. until….bam! out like a light. kinda funny to witness, but also a good time for some caretaking fluff.
Fever:
you die at 110F. no 'oh no his fever is 120F!! ahhh!“ no his fever is 0F because he’s fucking dead. you lose consciousness around 103, sometimes less if it’s a child. brain damage occurs at over 104.
ACTUAL SYMPTOMS:
sluggishness
seizures (severe)
inability to speak clearly
feeling chilly/shivering
nausea
pain
delirium
symptoms increase as fever rises. slow build that secret sickness! feverish people can be irritable, maybe a bit of sass followed by some hurt/comfort. never hurt anybody.
ALSO about fevers - they absolutely can cause hallucinations. Sometimes these alter memory and future memory processing. they're scary shit guys.
fevers are a big deal! bad shit can happen! milk that till its dry (chill out) and get some good hurt/comfort whumpee shit.
keep writing u sadistic nerds xox love you
ALSO I FORGOT LEMME ADD ON:
YOU DIE AT 85F
sorry I forgot. at that point for a sustained period of time you're too cold to survive.
pt 2
also please stop traumadumping in the notes/tags, that's not the point of this post. it's really upsetting to see on my feed, so i'm muting the notifs for this post. if you have a question about this post, dm me, but i don't want a constant influx of traumatic stories. xox
#writing tips#writing advice#writing help#writblr#how to write#fiction writing#for writers#on writing#writing stuff#writer life
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I think it should be absolutely mandatory that people work at least a month in a blue collar job and take time to learn about their coworkers before making a statement about blue collar work. I simply think it would fix so many things.
#melon rambles#my father (who makes over 100k a year in his comfy computer job where he can work from home and honestly doesn't even do that much technica#stuff and works less than 40 hours a week) talked about the horrible overtime requirements of the factory I work at#as 'well that's what you get. You just take that job for a bit until a better job comes around'#and it's like. This IS the 'better job' for most people I work with!#Like we live in a small town with maybe 30 companies total that anyone could work at#one of my friends has lived in this town for over a decade and almost exhausted his job options here#because there's only one company in this area that could use his degree but they said he doesn't have enough experience so they refuse to#hire him. Meanwhile he's got a family and bills to pay so he picks up a customer service job and guess what? It sucks#He's worked like at least 10 jobs here and about half of them have had such deep issues (horrible labor law violations. Incompetent manager#who yell at people and cut hours willy billy. Safety issues. You name it)#and now he's trying to find a 'better job' but all of the jobs he can get are bad. And the only good job refuses him for a stupid reason#and that's how it is for a lot of people! Some of my coworkers are 60-70 year olds who can't retire#they've been working blue collar jobs their entire lives and this factory was the most bearable one with good enough pay#it drives me crazy that my father thinks anyone can just somehow work their way up to a job they enjoy#when a lot of people just never get that perfect opportunity#and it also infuriates me how companies can decide to just screw over workers with something like mandated 50+ hour work weeks#and some people can't leave because it's the only job they can get that pays enough to feed their kids#and tangentially related point: blue collar workers are the absolute backbone of society#where would we be without janitors? Construction workers? Factory people? Anything customer service? Maintenence or repair people?#they literally run everything but get treated like absolute crap by companies or looked down upon#it just aaaaaaghhhhhhhggggghhhhhhh#I wish we lived in a world where manual labor jobs were just another career path you could choose of many#and they were deemed respectable honored jobs by everyone#and they were given good pay and good management and working conditions#because honestly from the jobs I've worked. I've actually enjoyed the job itself to some degree#but there were just so many bad management things that made me just dread going in every day.
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#not kpop related#i know it's not gonna happen#but imagine if gmbm traded a boatload of picks for zegras#maybe one of our younger prospects that isn't ryan leonard#i understand the issues with him defensively#but fuck just put him with ovi and FEED them o-zone starts#we already do that with ovi#it's not like he was ever defensively responsible much less now with how slow he is#whatever people think about zegras' attitude problems#seems overblown#and if he comes to dc#he will learn to be a big boy bc we have a genuinely great locker room#and a true team culture#instead of whatever's happening in anaheim#idk man i just THINK IT COULD WORK and i want it so bad#tbh probably we'd have to trade one of mcmichael or lapierre for him with picks#which is sad#but idk...#zegras-strome-mcmike/lappy#would be a pretty sick rebuild of our center depth on the fly for the last couple seasons of ovi's career#go caps go
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Resonance
sylus x fem!reader - read part 2!
summary: with the aether core's auction quickly approaching, you're growing desperate to resonate with sylus. fortunately for you, he has a suggestion... even if it is less conventional.
cw: nsfw (18+) - mdni!!, smut, p in v, fingering, teasing, spit kink, light choking, oral sex, praise kink, slightly ooc sylus?, minor canon divergence
wc: 4.5k
a/n: my first time writing a full fic or smut for that matter! given how many times sylus was trying to hold the mc's hand, i just figured he'd be into it. tried to be strong for zayne, but that didn't work out... sorry zayne. hope you guys like it! <3
also posted on ao3!
You’re starting to regret your plan to sneak into the N109 Zone. From being drugged to nearly being killed, you weren’t exactly faring well in the unfamiliar place.
A deep sigh escapes you, fingers rubbing at your aching temples. The headache had gotten worse, the band around your head wrapping tighter and tighter. You couldn’t leave though, no matter how desperately you wanted to, not when the Aether Core’s other half was up for auction in a week’s time. Sylus had also been distant. Despite saving you from the night raid, he had hardly come to visit while you were staying at Onychinus’ base. The twins, Luke and Keiran had kept you company though. They weren’t as wicked as you thought them to be, only young men that were intent on working for Onychinus, driven by their own motivations.
The week was bound to shorten however, and you were growing antsy. Any reservations you had about resonating with Sylus were fading quickly as the auction date grew closer. He was right in a sense, you two needed to resonate, especially after that night raid when the Wanderers had attacked. The auction wouldn’t go smoothly either, you knew that much. Sylus had money, but traitors were lurking everywhere. The shopkeeper’s voice rings in your head, reminding you that Sylus hadn’t been responsible for the explosions. Absolving him of being responsible had been hard enough.
Plucking at the strap of your nightgown, you’re contemplating whether you should sneak out. Sylus had been accommodating enough so far, and you were tempted to push your boundaries. He had, after all, left a pile of clothes for you. Strangely enough, they were all in the right size, accompanied by Mephisto who had let out a loud caw before flying out, its claws making a playful swipe for your hair.
A few more anxious plucks at the strap of the nightgown and you’re sneaking out. Feed pad against the floor softly, nightgown swaying as you move through the hallway. You pause when you hear voices, hearing the thud of your own heart as you hold your breath. It’s Sylus and another man. The conversation is too muffled to listen into, incoherent words blending in together.
The door creaks open and you’re tucking yourself behind a pillar, hiding in the dark. The sound of footsteps fades into the distance and the breath you’re holding escapes into a quiet exhale.
“You can come out now,” A voice drawls. Sylus. You hated how he could sense your presence. Stepping out from behind the pillar, your back straightens, walking into his room. It’s dark, just like him. Expensive furniture, books stacked onto a bookshelf and a bed on the other side of the large room. The curtains are open, moonlight flowing in through the windows, mixing with the ambient lighting. He sits behind his desk, eyes trained on you, nursing a cup of wine. “I see you’re wearing my gift,” he says, eyes dragging over the nightgown. You scoff, eyes narrowing at him, “It was hardly a gift, and it’s not like I could sleep in my Hunter uniform.”
He only takes another sip of wine, eyebrows raising. His nonchalance is making you feel irritated. “You’re avoiding me,” you announce, arms crossing over your chest, “is there any reason?”
He laughs, low and deep, “I thought you’d be grateful for the reprieve, or maybe you don’t hate me as much as you think you do.” That has you scowling. You want to wipe his stupid smug smile right off his face. “Relax,” he says, his fingers tapping against his desk as he leans back in his chair “I had more important things to attend to.” That catches your attention. More important things? Perhaps he’d have answers, and you needed answers, about the N109 Zone, about Onychinus, about anything .
“Private matters,” he murmurs, red eyes keeping you in place “nothing for you to get involved with.”
Your scowl only grows deeper, almost forgetting what you came in here for. Your feet move across the carpet, hands landing on the edge of his desk in an attempt to look intimidating.
“I want to try resonating with you,” you say, deciding to change tactics.
He hums, red eyes boring into yours. “We already tried that, and unfortunately, you seem content on disliking me,” he replies.
A frustrated noise escapes you, “It’s your fault!” you accuse, glaring at him.
He only stares back at you blankly. You feel like a child throwing a tantrum under his gaze. “Just- please? ” you ask, voice softening slightly. He’s letting out an inconvenienced sigh and your body is moving, red tendrils swooping around your body as he draws you closer to him. “Hand,” he demands. You reach forward, and his hand clasps yours, fingers lacing together. A deep breath gets sucked in through your mouth and your eyes squeeze shut, trying to channel your energy and resonate with him. You think about his stupidly handsome face, his low voice and the times he had saved you. Both of your knuckles are white with how tightly you’re squeezing his hand. There’s nothing though, absolutely nothing. No sparks, no glowing light, no Evol resonance. Letting out a defeated sigh, you let go of his hand. He stares back at you, eyes searching. “There is something wrong with you,” he says, drawing his hand back to take another sip of wine.
“Maybe if you tried being more likeable, this would be easier,” you retort, sending him another glare.
Sylus only laughs, his head tilting, “You weren’t so intent on resonating with me earlier. So much so that you shot me.”
“You shot yourself,” you correct, voice sharp, “and the change in mind is because of the auction.”
He peers over at you, eyes calculating. You can’t tell what’s going through his head, you can never tell. It puts you on edge. Sylus is a dangerous man and you aren’t able to predict a single one of his moves.
“You’re afraid of Wanderers,” he surmises, hands clasping in his lap.
His chair rolls out a bit from his desk and your eyes are dipping to see his legs spread as he gets comfortable. There’s a stretch in the black trousers as his thighs strain against the material and you’re swallowing harshly, eyes snapping back up to meet his gaze. If he noticed your wandering eyes, he doesn’t say anything.
“I’m not scared!” you protest, feeling exasperated “I’m simply worried that something might happen. We both know that the Aether core might become unstable with energy fluctuations, and who knows what sort of Wanderers that flux might attract?”
“I am more than capable of handling any danger,” Sylus says, his tone dark, “or do you need a refresher of what happened after I saved you during the night raid?”
You wince at the memory. It appears he doesn’t like being underestimated. It’s even worse that you remember. There had been blood and screams when his Evol had eviscerated the men that had been there.
“No refreshers needed,” you reply quickly.
Your plan of resonating with him is ill-thought, you realise. You can’t get your mind to change, no matter how hard you try. Head hanging low, you decide to back off. Sylus is right at least. He would be capable enough of defeating any danger there, but his assurance isn’t enough to quell your doubts. Silence passes over you both, only interrupted by your feet shifting on the spot.
“There is another way,” Sylus says slowly, a wicked grin spreading across his face, “it is less conventional of course, hardly attempted at.”
Hardly attempted at? Was he planning to put your life on the line? Maybe that would work out for him, weaken you enough to get you to resonate with him and then steal the Aether core lodged in your heart.
“And this way is…?” you prompt, raising your brows.
His grin only grows wider. Sylus stands up, long legs stalking towards you until he’s standing in front of you, his red eyes staring down at you. His cold hand reaches out, fingers grabbing at your chin to tilt your head as his own head dips towards your ear. You shiver, feeling his warmth breath against your skin. “Sex,” he whispers.
Well, you certainly weren’t expecting that. Your cheeks are hot with embarrassment, gaze averted to the side.
He clicks his tongue, “Why so embarrassed? I thought you wanted to resonate, sweetie .”
“You’re more insane than I thought,” you hiss, shoving at his chest.
He lets out a throaty laugh, a smirk spreading across his lips as he stumbles back a bit at the force of your push.
“You seemed desperate,” Sylus says when he stops laughing, “I was only letting you know of all the options.”
“That shouldn’t even be an option!” you snap, growing flustered by the second. Sex with Sylus ? He was a murderer and completely and utterly unhinged, not to mention the leader of an illegally run gang. You were not having sex with him. Your irritation festers, head falling into your hands as you stand there. He doesn’t say anything, only reaching for his wine and finishing off his cup.
“Fuck me,” you sigh tiredly, rubbing at your aching temples again.
“Don’t tempt me,” he replies. Your head snaps upwards at that, glaring at him. Irritation has only led to you making a poor choice of words.
“I’m leaving,” you say forcefully, holding your head high.
You should be leaving by now, storming off back to your room lying a few doors away. You should be, except your poor feet aren’t working.
He stares at you expectantly, a hint of smile on his face as his brows raise.
“I am leaving,” you repeat, voice hardening.
He only nods his head towards the door. Part of you wants to stay, to find out what he means, but the implications are clear and you won’t do that with him. Especially not him.
You don’t get very far though, the door lock fastening in place with a resounding click . His Evol curls around your body, the inky red and black lines tugging you back towards him. Sylus is reaching for you, his hand cupping your cheek. You have half the mind to lean into his touch. “I think we’ll both have more fun if you stay,” he whispers against your ear, arms drifting across your nightgown to wrap around your waist and tug you closer.
He peers down at you, and your breath catches in your throat. Without thinking, you’re leaning into him, body pressing against him.
“I think you want to stay,” he continues, hands sliding up to pet at your hips.
“You- you don’t know what I want,” you manage out, voice airy, “and I want to leave.”
He hums, hand finding your cheek again. His thumb rubs across your skin, and it sets you alight.
“Did you forget?” he murmurs, head dipping to meet your height, “I can see what people desire the most, and it appears you, my dear Hunter, desire me.”
You’re letting out a soft curse. You had forgotten about that stupid detail, about his ability to see what people desired. Squirming in his grasp, you try to get away, but he holds you still, letting out a disappointed sigh.
“Will you not indulge yourself?” he whispers, voice lilting. You think he could be a siren in disguise.
There’s a shuddering breath escaping you. You don’t get a chance to answer, not when he’s smiling against your cheek and pressing a soft kiss to it. Your hands find his shirt, forming fists to prevent your knees from buckling.
“We are the same,” he reminds you, lips brushing across your skin as he backs you up against the wall.
You manage a scoff, “We are not the same. You’ve done terrible things and killed people. You do whatever you want, sacrificing whoever you want if it betters your cause.”
“Such insolent words,” he purrs, his hand curling around your neck “I have treated you with far more kindness than others that have crossed my path.”
A squeak leaves when he squeezes around your neck, your fingers trying to pry his ones away from your neck. He only tightens his grip, landing another kiss to your cheek and there’s heat between your thighs, a whine escaping you before you can swallow it down.
Sylus laughs, his hand falling away from your neck to grab at your hips instead.
“Caught you,” he coos, and with that his head is dipping, lips pressing against yours.
You whine again, arms wrapping around his neck. You’re too far gone to care, feeling the plushness of his lips against yours. It feels as though he’s trying to devour you, trying to swallow you whole.
The kisses are rough and harsh and his hands are slipping under your nightgown, sliding up the backs of your thighs to grasp at your ass. You gasp into his mouth, scrabbling at his shoulders. He grunts against your mouth, guiding your leg to hook over his hip.
“You are far more eager than you said you would be,” he murmurs, finally pulling away to let you breathe.
Soft pants escape you, chest heaving as your hands drop from his shoulders, landing against his chest instead. He stares down at you, crimson eyes bright with arousal as they flit about your body.
“You’ve done something to me,” you mutter lamely, a weak excuse for responding so eagerly.
He raises his brows, his thumb brushing across your lips. He repeats the motion, over and over again until you're tempted to press a kiss to the pad of his thumb. You don’t get a chance, not when his thumb is pushing past your lips and meeting the resistance of your teeth. Blinking up at him, you tilt your head.
“You know I haven’t done anything to you,” he replies, “that would be too far, even for me. Now be good and open .”
He has to have done something to you. What other explanation is there for the way your mouth opens, sucking his thumb inside eagerly? Your head tips back as you suck on his thumb, tongue swirling around the digit. He groans, deep and unabashed and it has your hips bucking. “Patience,” he whispers, pushing his thumb further into your mouth. You gag slightly, sending him watery glare.
Sylus only smiles back, keeping you in place as you suck on his thumb. The ache between your thighs is too hard to ignore, and your hand is sneaking down in an attempt to relieve the ache.
You’re horribly wet between your thighs, feeling your thighs practically slip against each other as you squirm. Your fingers only manage two full circles against your clit before Sylus is letting out a growl, tugging your hand free from where it had snuck into your panties.
“I- I need-“ you whine, trying to sneak your hand between your thighs again.
“You need me ,” he hisses, eyes hard as he grabs at your wandering hand, gaze locking onto your slick fingers. There’s a sharp gasp that leaves you when his own mouth is enveloping around your fingers, his eyes on yours as he sucks them clean. You feel weak at the sight, a dreamy sigh escaping you. He smirks, forgetting your fingers to kiss you again. You taste yourself on his tongue, feeling the way he licks into your mouth, his hands squeezing at your hips.
He’s picking you up before too long, dumping you on his bed. You hide shyly when he rips your nightgown from your body, his eyes staring down at your bra and panties greedily. The bra goes next and he’s lowering his head, sucking your nipple into his mouth, tongue flicking against the pebbled bud. You don’t know what to do, arms wrapping around his neck to keep him there, trying desperately to seek relief. “So impatient,” Sylus mutters against your spit-slick skin, opting to suck on your other breast as his hand delves between your thighs. “Don’t stop,” you whimper, eyes slipping shut “please, don’t stop.”
He lets out a low laugh, fingers rubbing at you through your panties. “How obedient you’ve become. Squirming under my fingers like a little slut. Didn’t you say you hated me before?” he whispers.
“I- I do hate you!” you grit out, but your hand is finding his wrist, keeping his hand there as you grind your clothed pussy against his fingers.
He scoffs disappointedly, body slinking down the bed until his nose is pressing against your panties and he’s breathing in. You feel as though you might faint at the depraved sight. His tongue laves across the fabric of your panties and you moan his name, fingers finding their home in his hair.
Sylus sucks at your clit through your panties, licking at the slick that seeps through the dampened fabric.
“An intoxicating taste,” he comments, pressing a kiss to your thigh “I could do this for days.”
That little comment has you letting out a shuddering breath and words you might regret if your mind wasn’t so stupidly hazy. “I would let you,” you mumble, tugging his face closer to where you want him, feeling the press of his nose against your clit. He grins, red eyes staring up at you, “that can be arranged.” Sylus’s long fingers are pulling down your panties and he’s staring at your cunt, a deep groan escaping him. “Such a pretty pussy,” he whispers, pressing a soft kiss to your clit.
A strangled noise leaves you and his mouth is latching onto your pussy, sucking and licking like a man starved. Whines and whimpers escape you as you grind your hips against his tongue. He moans back into your cunt, the sound shooting up through your body, thighs twitching. Sylus keeps you pinned down, tongue laving against your wetness, drinking up your slick as it leaks. It’s almost too much, which is why your hand reaches for his. Sylus gives his own hand, fingers lacing with yours. You’re so lost in the haze of his tongue against you that you can barely hear his voice.
“Resonate,” he speaks into your pussy, his hand gripping yours tight. “What?” Your dazed eyes find his, bewildered. “I said, resonate ,” he repeats, sucking your clit into his mouth harshly.
His teeth graze against the sensitive bud and your back is arching, hand squeezing his one back. Your Evol comes much easier this time, light emanating from both your hands as you resonate. The linkage takes place, and it has you reeling, body twitching as you come on his tongue. The light soon fades, his own Evol dimming down. He presses another soft kiss to your sensitive clit. “Some incentive and your body is reacting remarkably well,” he smiles down at you. You could hardly care about resonance at this point, pushing at his shoulders and crawling up onto his lap, lips pressing against his. He grunts at the sudden change in position, but kisses you back, his hands groping at your ass appreciatively. A whine gets swallowed up by his mouth, your hips rocking against his hardness wantonly. Your fingers pull at his shirt and he’s staring at you with spit-slick lips. He tugs his shirt free and you suck in a sharp breath, taking him in. While you do this, your hips pause in their movements and he’s letting out a click of his tongue, using his hands to guide you start moving again. “You resonated with me,” he whispers against your lips. “Hardly,” you murmur back, nails digging into his shoulders. “Don’t be like that,” he chastises, “I made you come on my tongue and this is how you treat me?” he pouts mockingly.
“Such a good girl, aren’t you?” He coos, guiding your hips to move in the way he wants to, “moaning and whimpering for me. Perhaps I should’ve suggested this path from the start.” You try to glare at him, but he’s only gripping your cheeks, prying your mouth open before his tongue is lolling out, dropping a glob of spit into your mouth. “Swallow, baby.” You do so almost immediately, mouth opening eagerly for more. He laughs, almost in disbelief, kissing you messily this time, letting you suck on his tongue. “I need you,” you whisper, pressing his hand against your tummy “need you in me, Sylus.”
His eyes flash and he’s kissing you harder, clothed bulge grinding up into your bare pussy. The drag of his trousers is stimulating, catching on your clit in a way that has you shaking on his lap. “You’re filthy,” he hisses, sucking harsh kisses against your neck “such a filthy slut, begging for my cock.” You whine in agreement, nodding mindlessly. The world is moving then, your eyes finding the roof as he settles between your thighs. He kisses you over and over again, before he’s drawing back, slipping off the bed to pull his trousers down. A loud moan escapes you at the sight, his fat cock bobbing between his thighs. The tip is dark with arousal, veins prominent against the skin. Part of you wants it in your mouth, to swallow his cum and feel the weight of his cock on your tongue, and the other part wants it inside of you, filling you up. Embarrassment forgotten, you’re spreading your thighs in what you hope is an enticing manner, biting your lip and batting your eyelashes over at him. He glances down at your glistening pussy, licking his lips. “In me, please” you sweetly request. He hums, crawling over you. He grasps his cock, tapping the tip of it against your clit a few times. Pre-cum beads at the tip, a fat glob dripping down. Your hand shoots out before it’s wasted, fingers catching the glob. Smiling up at him, you suck your fingers into your mouth, letting out an appreciative moan at the taste. His eyes darken at the sight, fingers dimpling the flesh of your thigh as he squeezes.
“You’ll regret this when you have to leave me,” he warns, “I won’t be there to stuff your pussy full or lick that pretty cunt when you’re feeling needy.” “Then make it count,” you retort, legs wrapping around his hips. He lets out a short laugh, kissing you again. Soft whines leave you when he pushes in, his cock sinking deep into your pussy. You think you might be able to feel him in your throat, his cock stretching you out so deliciously that it has you writhing.
“So fucking tight,” he breathes out, kissing along your jaw “so warm. I can feel you clenching around me, baby.”
“Fuck,” you mewl, nails scratching down his back as he thrusts into you. In any other situation, you might be mortified at the sounds.
The squelch of your pussy, his heavy balls slapping against your ass as he fucks you. It seems like his favourite thing to do is to hold your hands, though.
“So pretty for me,” he sighs, hips grinding deeper into your wet heat “such a good girl, hm? My good girl.”
The praise has your heart fluttering wildly, cheeks flushing.
“Oh, you like that,” he murmurs, his lips latching onto your tits again, “my pretty, little slut, all laid out for me. You could’ve had this cock earlier, I would’ve given it to you. I could’ve stuffed you full, or bent you over my bike and pounded this tight little cunt until you were screaming.”
A hoarse moan leaves you. Your hands are squeezing his, legs tightening around him.
“That’s it,” he whispers encouragingly, “take my cock baby, it’s all yours.”
“Stop- stop talking like that,” you whine, writhing under his body.
“Why?” he responds, “does it feel better than you had imagined?”
“I wasn’t imagining-“
“Hush now,” he whispers, kissing you over and over again. You’re not sure how much more of this you could take.
His cock is pounding into you, punching out the air in your lungs. It feels too good, the throb of his cock and his whispered words against your ear. You hiccup, peering up into his crimson eyes. He stares right back at you, the look behind his eyes startlingly soft.
You shy away, head turning to the side, cheek squishing against the pillow. His hand turns your face back to him, nose nudging against yours gently. He kisses you softer this time, the sound of your kisses drowned out by the drag of his cock in your cunt.
“Come for me, baby” Sylus whispers, squeezing your hand “cream my cock.”
It’s enough to have you shuddering around him, a whine of his name leaving your mouth as you cream on his cock, just like had told you to. He drinks up every noise, lips working against yours as he fucks into until he’s burying his cock deep inside, letting out a low growl against your ear as hot cum spurts from his tip, filling you up.
You sigh at the feeling, body feeling limp. Sylus is slumped on top of you, his weight oddly comforting against yours. A kiss is pressed against his cheek and you can feel his smile from where he’s tucked his head into the crook of your neck.
It’s a little uncomfortable though, so you’re pushing at his chest to get him to roll off of you. Sylus does so with little noise and you’re curling up against his side, already missing the stretch of his cock.
“You were being nice,” you say softly, breaking the silence.
“Would you prefer it if I were rougher?” he asks in return, rubbing his hand against the curve of your hip soothingly.
You roll your eyes, pinching his bicep.
“The auction will go smoothly,” he announces, his hand drifting to squeeze your ass, “we did resonate, after all.”
You had almost forgotten about that. A nod is your response and he’s dragging you closer to give you another kiss.
“Training begins tomorrow morning,” Sylus continues, “I need to see how strong we can be together.”
You’re letting out a groan, swatting his chest and shoving him away.
“Leave me alone,” you mumble, burying your face into the pillows.
He smiles, arms curling around your waist to tug you back into his warm chest.
“Now, now. You were being so good earlier,” he whispers “I’d be happy to reward you, if you perform well tomorrow.”
His hand smooths across your stomach, hand drifting lower to delve between your thighs. You muffle the noise that threatens to spill out.
“You’re insufferable,” you mutter, eyes slipping shut.
“I think you like that about me,” Sylus murmurs, his fingers curling up inside of you, beginning to move at a leisurely pace.
“You’re the worst, Sylus” you whisper, hips rocking as you try to get his fingers to sink deeper.
“Yet here you are, trying to fuck yourself on my fingers,” he purrs, his arm winding around your neck. You feel him squeeze and you’re whimpering, sinking your teeth into his bicep as he holds you in place, letting his fingers fuck in and out of you.
It’s going to be a long night.
#sylus smut#sylus x reader#sylus#love and deepspace#love and deepspace sylus#lnd sylus#lnds smut#sylus qin#love and deepspace mc
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