#love u all tho and im hoping to figure This All out soon

[endfght]

sorry i’ve disappeared off the face of the earth these pc problems were just the catalyst into some Bad seasonal depression

[python333]

I love your writings sm. And I love the way you write platonic stuff with task force 141 😋

You can ignore this if ya want but I just can't get over reader angst. Honestly atp I starve for angst. Could you feed us another angst fic? Like platonic 141 with a reader where she maybe got pretty badly injured while being on a mission? :3

AND. don't forget to stay hydrated and eat well!! Take any breaks you need 😌.

(sorry if this doesn't make sense English is not my native language 🥲)

below zero — python333

— — — —

synopsis u get thrown into a freezer after refusing to give up intel to enemy soldiers, and u get thrown into a freezer, and ghost comes and saves u :3

relationships platonic!ghost & gn!reader.

characters ghost.

word count 5.2k

warnings hypothermia, disorientation, 2nd person pov [you/yours/yourself], usage of c/n [code name/call sign].

note hi anon thank u so much for all the compliments!!! before i say anything else, i wanna point out that i 1) only really wrote ghost into this and 2) literally read the request completely wrong and i think im actually just illiterate because how did i mess up this bad. ALSO hi its been a month since i posted on here i swear i'm still alive i'm just super busy with school!! updates are going to be extremely slow, so i apologize in advance. still, i hope u enjoy it anyways tho!! its all hurt/comfort + angst/fluff + protective/soft ghost :3

When you were thrown into the freezer, the first thing you noticed were the bodies. 

There’s ten that you can immediately see, and twelve once you look a little bit closer. All of them are suspended from the ceiling, each hanging from their ankle—with said ankle being held up by a meat hook. 

When the door had been closed shut with a loud, booming thump you hadn’t felt any immediate fear. But now, as you’re sitting in the corner of the freezer you’d been trapped in—the corner farthest away from any bodies—that fear is starting to set in.

Before this, only a few minutes ago, you were being interrogated. Your captors were asking for information on the details of any upcoming missions, objectives, target locations, anything that you had about the 141 that you could share with them, they wanted. 

Of course, you didn’t say anything. You remained silent throughout the entire thing, not talking once, even when at the end of the whole thing your interrogator slammed his hand down onto the table you were sat down in front of and yelled at you to say anything. 

When he and his team figured out that you wouldn’t give them any information, you remember he muttered something unintelligible under his breath and swiftly walked over to your end of the table. He had uncuffed your ankles from the legs of the chair you were sitting down on and uncuffed your wrists from the table, and before you could fight back, he grabbed both of your wrists with one hand and dragged you behind him. 

Then, he led you to the freezer you were trapped in now, and threw you in roughly before shutting the door behind you. You had hit and scratched at the door for a good minute after being thrown in, and after you figured that it was a waste of time trying to do so, you sighed and retired to the corner.

Now, as you’re huddled in the corner, you kind of regret not giving them the intel they needed. 

The freezer wasn’t too bad at first—you thought you’d last pretty long in there, and mentally called all the dead bodies hung from meat hooks in there pussies and simply walked around for a bit. The walking helped warm you up a bit, but soon it got tiring, and you retired to the corner farthest away from any dead bodies. 

You think the freezer is below zero degrees—no, has to be below zero, because now, just about five minutes after being thrown in, violent shivers have started to wrack your body and you swear you can’t feel your lips anymore. You haven’t been able to feel any sort of warmth in the past four minutes, all of it disappearing within the first. 

And God, the smell. The smell of frozen, rotting flesh really isn’t something you ever want to smell again. Thankfully, there’s no live flies in the freezer—all of them had died of the severe cold, creating small black circles under each hanging body where they died. 

You currently have your knees up to your chest with your hands trapped in between your thighs to try and keep them warm at least, with your forehead resting on the top of one of your knees. It’s working, kind of. The palms and backs of your hands feel just warm enough to not be considered cold, but the tips of your fingers are so cold they’re beginning to burn. 

You pull them back a bit to trap your fingertips in between your thighs, exposing the area where your wrist and hand meet to the cold, sighing as your fingertips warm up just a bit. Your thighs, thankfully, still have some heat trapped in between them, and you think your stomach is still somewhat warm. 

Around ten minutes later, you feel the heat trapped in your thighs start to dissipate. Fucking fantastic. You sigh and let your head tilt back, the back of it hitting the wall behind you, making you wince at the cold metal directly on your head. The cold seems to crawl through your hair and make it to your scalp, small pinpricks of the cold spreading throughout your scalp and the back of your neck. 

You’re reminded of just how cold it is then, of how this is quite literally a freezer, and of how said freezer has already claimed twelve lives. Or, at least, has housed twelve dead bodies and several unfortunate flies.

Just then, the fear finally starts to set in. 

At first, you weren’t all too worried about being saved—you figured you’d be found soon enough, since your team has a general idea of where you are. But the more you think about it, the more your brain emphasizes the general part of general idea. You start to think about how they don’t know any specifics. 

Sure, they know that you were captured, and that you were being held in some small part of Italy, and the people who captured you—but what did they know beyond that? Did they know your exact location? How long would it take them to figure it out? And how long would it take them to get here? 

Would you even be alive by the time they got here, if they ever did?

You notice your teeth starting to make an annoying chattering noise and you bite down to stop them. The violent shivers that wrack your body don’t help, the intense trembling only succeeding in making you more anxious. You start to become hyper aware of the cold that crawls onto your back from the freezing metal you’re leaning back on, and you quickly push yourself just a foot away from it so that it no longer bothers you. 

Your feet are starting to feel numb, you don’t think you’d be able to stand on them anymore if you tried, for you fear you’d just stumble and fall down. You look around the small freezer. There’s nothing that could help you get out—there’s only the bodies suspended from the ceiling and the dead flies that surround them. 

You’re glad none of the bodies are facing you—you don’t know what you would do if you had to sit in the corner with a bunch of dead bodies staring at you with their vacant, frozen-over eyes. Thinking about the eyes makes your own water, and you blink away the small tears that’ve gathered on your waterline. 

You can’t feel them, but you see the tears that were once in your eyes now clumping together on your eyelashes, making your brows furrow. With them starting to cling to your eyelashes comes blurriness for the top half of whatever you can see. You sigh, a white puff of condensation hanging in the air as evidence of your exhale, and move your hand out from in between your thighs to wipe away the tears from your lashes haphazardly. 

You don’t bother to put your hand back in between your thighs, instead just resting it on top of your knee. Despite it only having been around fifteen minutes since you were thrown into the freezer, you’re starting to feel more fatigued and your breath slows down significantly, as does your heartbeat. 

Another ten minutes of doing nothing but staring at the wall opposite of your own pass by, and disorientation is starting to set in. You feel oddly forgetful—like at times, you forget how you even got into the freezer, and have to wrack your brain to remember that you literally got thrown into it and are now trapped in here until someone rescues you. Assuming they do. Who was it that would even rescue you? 

You think long and hard for a few seconds, and can scrounge up nothing from your confused mind. You let out a frustrated huff and let your head tilt and fall forward so that your forehead is resting atop your knee, another shiver ripping through your frame. It almost feels like it’s getting colder in the fridge. 

Suddenly, you hear a loud banging noise—albeit, it sounded more muffled to your ears, but you could tell it was loud—and guns being fired. 

You can’t really tell when the gunfire dies down, but you can tell when the thumping of someone’s boots grows louder and closer to the door of the freezer. You try to stand up, not really knowing why since you’re in no condition to fight, having been in a freezer for about forty minutes, but you still attempt to. 

You find that standing is extremely difficult after practically being frozen alive for the past forty minutes, because as soon as you try to even push yourself off of the ground with your shaky hands, you discover that you aren’t even strong enough to push yourself up a single inch before having to stop. As well as that, you find that the ground is just as freezing as the walls and air of the freezer, because your hands now ached with frostbite. 

The action causes an unexpected wave of exhaustion to roll over you, and you pant to try and catch your breath, breathing white puffs of condensation out into the air. 

You hear a loud bang against the door, and jump at the sound, your head whipping towards the door. You hear another loud noise, and the confused fog that’s taken over your mind only grows thicker, your disorientation only growing stronger with it. The room feels like it’s spinning, and the feeling reminds you of a word, and you know what the word is, but fuck, why don’t you know it at the same time? Why can’t I remember anything? 

There’s another bang, and you hear muffled cursing before suddenly the door bursts open, a man wearing a skull mask stumbling in after it does so—he probably ran into it to open it, you think, watching the man get his balance back. He looks around for a moment before his eyes land on you, and the moment they do, you finally remember something. 

That’s Ghost. 

Somewhere in your confusion-clouded mind, you’re happy that you’ve finally remembered something. But right now, you can’t really think about anything—your mind is blank, and you can barely even process what you’re seeing. 

You’re so caught up in thinking about the fact that you aren’t really thinking, you’re just focusing a little more on whatever’s going on in your mind and not actually retaining any of it, that you don’t even notice Ghost rushing towards you and kneeling down right next to you. 

He pauses for a moment, but after a second he makes the decision to put one hand behind your back and snake one under your legs, the warm physical touch making you wince. Not that you didn’t like the warmth—you just didn’t like the sudden temperature change beneath your knees and across your back.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you,” Ghost grunts as he picks you up, one arm under your knees and the other behind your back, lifting you up into a sort of bridal carry. He nearly drops you because of how cold your skin is—for a moment he thinks your back and legs are wet, then he realizes that no, they aren’t wet, you’re just really fucking cold. 

He takes a moment to make sure you’re secure in his arms before tilting his head to the side, all the way down to his shoulder, and muttering something into his earpiece. Despite being so close to him, his voice only sounds muffled to you—in all honesty, just about everything is starting to sound more muffled to you. You can only tell he’s done talking because he lifts his head back up and readjusts his arms around you, before walking out the busted-open door. 

The walking quickly turns into running, which then turns into sprinting, making your surroundings go blurry and makes your vertigo worse—it almost feels like you’re falling. You’re grateful you haven’t eaten anything in the past few hours, because you fear that if you had, you would’ve thrown it all up by now. All you can see are blurred colors—the hallways, you vaguely remember, because I’m in a building. How’d I even get here? Why am I here? You’re pulled out of your confused thoughts when you’re set down on the ground somewhere, and forced into a lying position with your limbs all outstretched. When you slowly blink up at what you thought was the ceiling, you’re both surprised and not surprised when you see the blue-black night sky. 

Not sure of what’s going on, you try to get up, but Ghost quickly pushes you back down, muttering something under his breath. He pauses for a moment, his blurred figure stopping any and all movements, before he suddenly picks you back up, making you wince at the way your head spins at the sudden movement. You hear a quiet, muffled—but clearer than before—’sorry’ from Ghost before he’s running again. 

It’s a much shorter distance this time, and instead of immediately setting you down, you hear something click and suddenly you hear another muffled voice. They sound concerned, you mentally note, Or maybe confused. Maybe both, actually. No yeah, definitely both. Well, now just concerned. Or maybe that’s confused. 

Caught up in your confused thoughts, you don’t realize that you’re being set down on a few comfy seats. You aren’t pulled away from your own thoughts until you feel two warm hands cupping either side of your jaw, and hear Ghost’s oddly distressed voice becoming more clear by the second. You now acknowledge the weird ringing in your ears that almost drown out the sound of Ghost, and struggle to figure out what he’s saying through the annoying noise. 

“—something,” You catch the end of Ghost’s sentence, and blink up at him slowly. 

“Huh?” You elegantly ask, coughing and wincing at your hoarse voice, not knowing how it got so hoarse—or why it hurt so much to talk. Your throat almost felt like it was burning, but it also felt oddly numb, a sensation you couldn’t quite put a name on. 

“Oh my god,” Ghost sighs, his forehead falling onto your chest momentarily as he takes a few deep breaths. He brings his head back up from your chest and says, “I almost thought you were dead when I got in there. Jesus, you look dead. I need to— I need to get something, a blanket or— why the fuck don’t we carry any heat packs or anything in here? Swear to God, I’m gonna—” You don’t pay too much attention to Ghost’s panicked ranting and shift your head to the side to try and look at where you are, and you discover that you’re in a car. Oh. Cool. You spot the door on the passenger seat’s side still open and swinging a bit, as if it’d been opened quickly just a few moments earlier for someone to quickly get out. 

Ghost suddenly backs up and gets out of the car, though staying within a foot of it, looking around for a moment before heading to the back of the car. Your head clears up the tiniest bit, just enough for you to be able to assume that he’s heading to the back of the car to get to the trunk for whatever reason, and you simply lie there on the seat cushions. 

A few seconds later, Ghost comes back with a somewhat-fluffy jacket, and carefully gets into the car—half kneeling down so that he doesn’t need to lean on the seats to get to you. He tosses the coat over your chest, and it does absolutely nothing at first, at least not until Ghost gets a bit closer and tucks the coat tighter around you, treating it like a blanket. Then, it starts to warm you up just the tiniest bit. Beyond that, it does absolutely nothing. But props to Ghost for at least trying. 

He quickly backs out of the car and once he’s out he closes the door behind him, and you want to get up for a moment, just to go see what he’s doing, but you don’t have to. He gets into the car again, this time in the driver’s seat, and he turns on the ignition. Once the car rumbles to life, he immediately turns up the heat and leans over to the passenger seat’s side in order to close the door, and with a grunt he manages to do so. 

The newfound heat makes you shiver, and it almost feels like you’re in a microwave defrosting. Distracted by the sudden temperature change, you don’t pay attention to what Ghost is saying into his earpiece as he glances out the front window of the car and back at you. You simply tug the jacket tighter around your torso and relish in the warmth. 

“—ay. So we’ll just leave then, and you’ll be fine?” You pick up from Ghost’s conversation, perking up at the mention of leaving, “Copy that, Captain. I’ll get them back to base.”

‘Captain’—Oh, he’s talking to Price—says something that makes Ghost sigh exasperatedly and take his index finger off of his earpiece, instead settling both of his hands on the steering wheel of the car and stealing one last glance at you before setting his eyes on the gravel ahead of him and pushing down on the gas pedal.

— 

When you wake up, you’re significantly warmer than you were… however-long-it’s-been-ago. 

You look to your left and see nothing but a white wall and a heart rate monitor—which displays that your heart rate is 115—then to your right, where you see Ghost sitting in a plastic chair close to the bed you’re laying in, eyes closed with his head tilted to the side and resting on his own shoulder.

You don’t bother trying to wake him up, not knowing how long he’s been asleep or how much sleep he’s gotten, and instead simply turn your head back to stare up at the ceiling. 

After maybe five minutes of zoning out and staring up at the ceiling, you hear clothes rustling and look back over to your right, seeing Ghost start to stir in his sleep. Just a few seconds later, he stirs awake, slowly blinking his eyes open. 

You watch silently as he blinks the sleep out of his eyes, and he breathes in sharply through his nose before looking over at you and seeing you staring at him wordlessly. You both blink at each other for a long, awkward moment before he speaks. 

“… Did you, uh… how was your… rest?” Ghost asks, not sure what to say. What exactly do you say, after saving one of your teammates from potential death?

“Good,” You respond, your throat having an odd, small burning sensation when you talk. 

Ghost looks like he’s holding back a few words for a moment after you speak, and after one expectant look from you, he mumbles, “You should really say ‘well’ or ‘fine’ instead. It’d be more grammatically accurate and is more grammatically aligned with the verb ‘rest’.” 

“… Okay?” You blink, thrown off by the unexpected information, “I’ll, uh… keep that in mind, next time someone asks me how my rest was.” 

“You get asked that often?” 

“I only get asked that by you.” 

“Ah.” Ghost nods, looking off to the side for a moment. You’d think he was your dad and you’d just asked him how babies were made with how awkward he was, and you honestly expected the next words out of his mouth to be ‘when a man and a woman love each other very much’ before he hesitantly asks, “D’you feel better? After the whole being-trapped-in-a-freezer… experience?” 

“Experience?” You question, a light laugh evident in your voice, “Yeah, I feel better. I like being warm more than, y’know, being frozen alive. Laying down in a warm bed is nice.”

“I didn’t know how else to phrase it,” Ghost huffs out, leaning back in his seat. 

“So you’re gonna correct me on my grammar but you can’t think of a better word than ‘experience’?” 

“Don’t get smart with me, [c/n].” 

“I’m just saying,” You shrug lightly, wincing a little when your shoulders ache as you do. Ghost notices this and his eyes narrow, but he doesn’t mention it. 

“Then stop trying to sass me.” 

“Sass you? Jesus, fuck, don’t talk to me like I’m some preteen who just found out that they can talk back to their parents.” 

“Isn’t that what you are, though?” 

“No, I’m— you know what? Fuck you. Get out. I hate you. You suck.” 

“That’s a colorful choice of words to say to the man who saved your life,” Ghost raises an eyebrow at you, “I’m still waiting for my ‘thank you’, by the way.” 

“Don’t care, you’re never getting it,” You say stubbornly, making Ghost sigh and stand up. You look up at him as he stands up and try to sit up in your bed, but wince again when you try to move your arms. Still, you attempt to push yourself up, and only relax your weak joints and lay back down when Ghost presses a gentle hand to your shoulder to get you to stop trying to sit up. 

“Don’t,” He warns softly—you didn’t know his voice could get that soft—as he pushes you back down, “Medics said you’re to keep laying down for a bit while you warm up. We’ve gotta wait until your BPM is below a hundred before letting you up.” 

“That’s stupid,” You huff out, though not fighting Ghost pushing you back down. 

“It’s not stupid,” Ghost lightly chastises you, “It’s doctor’s orders. Once your BPM is below a hundred, we’ll know you’re warmed up enough to start gettin’ up and walking around.” 

“… Still stupid,” You grumble, not commenting on the way Ghost’s hand lingers on your shoulder even after you’ve already laid back down. Ghost sighs and kneels down so that his shoulders are level with the railing of your bed. 

“You’re too stubborn.” 

“I’m not.” 

“Yes you are.” 

“No I’m not!” Your light arguing only proves Ghost’s point further, and he knows this, the knowledge of it making him snicker quietly. 

“Uh huh. Sure, kid,” He begins to retract his hand from your shoulder, but upon seeing the disappointment that immediately seeps into your expression once he even barely begins to lift his hand from your shoulder, he immediately lets it rest right back onto your shoulder. 

You both sit in silence for another few moments before Ghost speaks up again, this time a bit quieter and in that same soft tone he’d used earlier, “I tried to get to you quicker. But we needed some time to get your exact location, and when we found it we were a hundred and sixty klicks away, and it was just—it took us… some time to find you.” 

“It’s fine. I understand,” You respond, about to shrug but stopping yourself, not wanting to feel that aching in your shoulders again, “I don’t even know how I let myself get captured, that— that’s probably on me.” 

“You didn’t let yourself get captured, you just did.” 

“Well…”

“Well, what?” 

“I don’t know, I just—” You take a deep breath before continuing slowly, “I didn’t let myself get captured, but I also didn’t do enough to fight against it, so I feel like technically—” 

“Fuck the technicalities about how you got captured, you got captured either way, and you got thrown into a freezer,” Ghost cuts you off, talking quickly, before sighing and continuing in a softer voice once again, “Please, just let me try to be somewhat comforting for once. You know I’m bad at this, and that I never do this. So just… don’t talk about what happened like that, if not for your own mental health’s sake, at least for my attempts at making you feel better.” 

You open your mouth to say something else but ultimately close your mouth and let out a deep sigh through your nose, not saying anything, letting Ghost continue to talk. 

“I, for whatever reason, feel… very oddly bad for you,” Ghost poorly explains, before pausing to think for a moment then rephrasing, “Not… not as in I pity you, but as in I feel bad for you in a way that I feel like I’m at fault for what you went through even though I know I’m not at fault. It’s like empathy but… worse. Not saying empathy is bad to begin with, but this is like if empathy was bad and it became worse and—” 

Ghost cuts himself off with silence and lets out a frustrated huff at his inability to put his feelings into words, and tries again, “I feel bad for you in a way that I don’t know what exactly you felt or how you felt in the moment that you were in that freezer but just the idea of you being in there without me for… I’m assuming an entire hour, if not longer, makes me feel like I failed. I don’t know what I failed at—”

Ghost quickly pauses before sighing and continuing, “Actually, no, I do. I feel like I failed at protecting you. Which is strange, because that’s technically not my job, but I felt—and still feel��obligated to protect you especially and that bothers me. Not bothers me in a sense that I don’t like you or the thought of… protecting you, but bothers me in the sense that I’m not supposed to feel like that. No amount of teasing, or borderline bullying, or anything should’ve ever made me feel obligated to think of you like— like— like…” Ghost trails off, leaving you wondering what he meant to say. He stays silent for a few moments, before you try to fill in for him. 

“Like… what, a kid?” You offer, watching him shake his head negatively. You think for another moment, before trying again, “… Like your kid?” 

Ghost nods affirmatively, hesitantly, and you want to scoff at the hesitation. 

“And what, that’s bad to you?” You ask, your words more venomous than you intended. Ghost sighs and nonverbally shakes his head negatively before responding to you.

“Not bad in the way you’re thinking,” He answers, before elaborating upon seeing your confused expression, “It’s bad not because you’re bad, it’s bad because I’m bad.” 

“… No you’re not?” 

“Yes, I am.” 

“No, you’re really not,” You insist stubbornly. 

“Please don’t be stubborn with me on this,” His tone makes it sound like he’s almost begging you, which is… somehow beyond terrifying to think about.  

“I’m not being stubborn, I’m being honest, you’re really not.” 

“But I am,” He sounds like he’s trying to make his tone sound like there’s no room for any further arguments, but he fails, and you continue to argue with him. 

“No you’re not!” The whole conversation feels like a parallel to the one you’d both been having just a few minutes earlier, except this time you’re not giving up as easily, “How are you bad?” 

“I’m—” Ghost pauses for a moment, not having expected that argument, and he weakly argues, “I just am!” 

“You’re not, and you fucking know it!” 

“Okay, well—” Ghost sighs and looks away from you, “You might not think so. That’s fine. But I know I am. If not for anything else, for you. I’d be… terrible as any sort of… I don’t know, role model to you.” 

“Jokes on you, you’re already a role model to me.” 

“I’m being serious.” 

“So am I,” You raise an eyebrow at him, “You aren’t a terrible role model. A little emo, sure, but not terrible.” 

“I’m emotionally and mentally unstable, and am terrible with empathy. I’m blunt, abrasive more than half the time, and I tell the shittiest jokes known to man. I can’t— I don’t show my face to anyone. I expect everyone to act the way I want them to. I’m almost always busy.” 

“At least you’re self-aware,” You brush off, “And, for the record, I don’t know what abrasive means and I can’t tell empathy from sympathy without using Google.” 

Ghost looks back at you in disbelief and stares for a moment before saying quietly, “Abrasive means harsh. And empathy is showing understanding for others while sympathy is pity.” 

“I also like your shitty jokes,” You add on, “I think they’re great. They make everyone else mad so I like them. And some of them are funny.” 

“You find them funny?” 

“Yeah?” 

“That’s…” Ghost blinks at you, eyes a little watery, before huffing out a small laugh, “That’s ridiculous, none of them are funny. I call them shitty for a reason.” 

“Some of them are pretty funny.” 

“Oh yeah? Like what?” 

“The Mayflower one.” 

“… That one?” Ghost asks, tone humorous but still disbelieving, “Out of all the ones I’ve told, that one?” 

“Yes, that one,” You insist, before pausing and holding back a smile while tacking on, “Unless you wanna tell it again to try and change my mind?” 

Ghost thinks for a moment before telling the joke, “If April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring?” 

You feign cluelessness for a moment, “What do they bring?” 

“Pilgrims.” The bluntness of the delivery makes you quietly snicker, much to Ghost’s surprise, the laugh not forced or anything. 

“It’s still good,” You sigh, small giggles still escaping your lips. 

“It’s really not,” Ghost sighs, finally retracting his hand from your shoulder to settle it on the railing of your bed and use it to help himself stand up. Once he fully stands up, he looks down at you, and one look at your face makes him want to whisk you out of bed and at least hug you, but he knows he can’t with your sore muscles and still-somewhat frozen skin. 

Instead, he opts for grabbing one of your hands gently and giving it a very emotionally charged squeeze, and holding it for another few moments before letting go. 

“I’m not forgetting that, by the way,” At Ghost’s confused eyes, you tack on, “You confirming earlier that you think of me as your kid.” 

“That—” Ghost stammers for a moment before saying, “That was barely a confirmation, that was just— that was nothing.” 

“Oh really?” 

“Yes. Yeah. Yep.” 

“So if I told you that you saying that that was nothing is making me a little bit upset…” 

“… Then I would say, out of pity, that I did mean it and that it was a confirmation.” 

“Good to know,” You nod. 

“But that’s only a hypothetical.” 

“Right, yeah, of course.” 

You both stay silent for another moment, the silence now a little less awkward, before Ghost says, “I’m gonna, uh… head out, now.” 

“Alright,” You hum simply, watching as Ghost nods to you as a sort of ‘bye’ before heading towards the curtains in front of your bed. 

Before he can exit, you quickly and quietly say, “Thank you, for saving me.” 

He pauses, a little confused on why you chose now to thank him—and why you thanked him at all—until he quickly recalls earlier in the conversation when he’d mentioned expecting some words of gratitude. 

He smiles behind his mask, the smile evident in his voice as he replies to you, “No problem.”

[milksnake-tea]

Can I ask for Nanook and Yaoshi (separate) x gn!reader whose a nameless hcs? ( akivili hasn't died yet)

loving nameless.

characters: nanook, yaoshi

contains: ooc!characters, slight yandere themes ??

a/n: these two were pretty similar so i bunched them up together, hope u don't mind! personally i can't see nanook abandoning their path to join the express so im sorry that will not be included 😭😭 i know u said nanook is ooc but my perfectionist self is too stickly for that HAUSHSU the yaoshi bias is real here tho

The second you mention your relationship, you're immediately faced with backlash. Both Welt and Akivili are absolutely appalled at the very notion of you being lovers with Nanook of all people. The Express members were practically begging you to reconsider, after all, Nanook was their mortal enemy. Nanook was dangerous, evil, and well... Nanook.

But Nanook was devoted to you, and wasn't planning on leaving anytime soon. You can still remember the dangerous flash in their molten eyes when Welt voiced his opposition, antimatter forming around them as they burned figurative holes into his body.

For a terrifying moment, you were afraid that they would simply kill the man, but it seemed that the presence of another Aeon made Nanook remember themself. In the end, they merely reminded the Trailblaze they were more than capable of destroying both Akivili and the Express, end of discussion.

The Express took a while to get used to the Destruction's visits. Pom-Pom hid behind Welt's legs whenever the Aeon appeared, but as time went on, the two of them grew to tolerate the other.

It's... ironic, to say the least, when Nanook welcomes you back after a trailblazing trip, especially after sealing one of their many Stellarons. It's something that has led to several playfights, where you whine to Nanook about what the Stellaron did to that world, while Nanook merely pats your head and pretends to care.

To be honest, you're the only reason why Nanook doesn't just plant another Stellaron after the one you just finished sealing.

Against you, the Aeon of Destruction looks akin to a kicked puppy whenever you drag them away from planets recovering from their Stellarons. There are certain planets whose civilizations you've befriended and are off-limits to Nanook's purge. It takes a lot out of the Aeon to go against the will of their Path, but they manage (you later catch them absolutely decimating another planet in order to satisfy their urges).

That said, when you do go on trailblazing missions, you have to be careful not to get hurt. Nanook obeys the "no murder" rule when on the Express, but any other worlds are fair game. Whenever you get so much so as a paper cut, you have to glare pointedly at the sky, knowing that Nanook was watching you.

All in all, being a Nameless as well as the lover of Nanook is quite the impressive feat. Many of the Express will never truly be accustomed to the Destruction, and the Stellarons often become an awkward topic.

But you make it work, somehow. Even if one day, you'll have to face down your lover for the sake of the galaxy.

Yaoshi met you on the Xianzhou ships, when you, alongside your fellow Nameless, faced off against a couple of their Disciples. You were quite the thorn in the Disciples' side, foiling their plans left and right, and so Yaoshi became intrigued, wondering just who was giving them so much trouble.

For a while, they merely observed you from the shadows, keeping themself hidden from both the Xianzhou and the Disciples. They didn't see what the big deal was - you were powerful, sure, but so were the rest of your companions. If anything, Yaoshi wagered that the one holding the Stellaron within them, or that older gentleman were bigger threats than you were.

They really should've left it at that. They should've turned away, perhaps given their Disciples a little boost, but nevertheless, Yaoshi should've left.

But they didn't.

Something about you kept them there, on enemy territory. Something about you lured them in, enraptured them. They found that their eyes were never able to fully leave your form, watching you in awe as you fought against their people.

Yaoshi speaks in your dreams, always sweetly smiling as they converse with you. They're wary of revealing their true identity, knowing how the Xianzhou paints them as some kind of villain (the audacity of that Hunt, honestly).

For the most part, you know them as a stranger - a beautiful stranger, but a stranger nevertheless. They visit frequently, always asking the same things: How was your day today? Did anything of interest happen? Oh, the Abundance's creations caused you some issues as of late? How troublesome.

As time passes, you become accustomed, comfortable with their presence, and you begin looking forward to your meetings. With Yaoshi, you can vent your troubles without fear of judgement, exchange jokes you would've otherwise been embarrassed to say, anything your heart desires. Yaoshi makes it easy to let your guard down, especially with their kind and empathetic nature.

When they inevitably reveal themself as Yaoshi, the Aeon of Abundance, you truthfully weren't surprised. You've figured that they were some type of deity - the arms being a dead giveaway that they weren't human. Their frequent complaints about a certain "pursuer" only strengthened your suspicions.

But what shook you was their admittance to their attachment to you. Yaoshi hadn't planned on staying around for this long, but you, whether intentionally or not, had carved a spot for yourself right in the Aeon's heart.

You didn't know what to make of it. You knew, deep inside, that you felt the same way. You didn't want to push them away, but knowing that they were the reason behind the Xianzhou's suffering made you hesitate. Your friends on the Xianzhou would surely never forgive you if you became lovers with the Abundance.

But Yaoshi understood. They saw your conflict, your hesitance, and they smiled - that infuriatingly sweet, understanding smile. They took your hand in theirs, and kissed your forehead.

It's alright if you needed time to process everything. Yaoshi was nothing if not patient. Whenever you were ready, Yaoshi would be waiting for you with open arms.

[monsterswithimagines]

Undisclosed Desires - Part 23

Joe Goldberg x female!reader

Summary: Twenty minutes before he would have met Guinevere Beck, Joe meets you instead. You intruige him, but it will soon become clear that there is something off about you. Words: 867

Masterlist

We already see Joe killing Ron on the show. I figured I don't have to describe it again. Besides, things are getting interesting...

DISCLAIMER: the towns and situations described in this chapter are fictionalized. There is no Nehalenia College in Koewacht. IDEK what is in Koewacht. (Koe means cow, so maybe a lot of cows??)

I have been very busy these last three days, (Y/n).

Nobody will miss Ron, but I miss you and I have been neglecting you. I feel bad. We have only texted a few times, and you say you are busy and jetlagged. But I can tell you’re just giving me an excuse to be distant, because when I text you, you respond right away.

I have been a bad boyfriend, but I think if you knew why I was so busy these last few days, you’d forgive me. I hope you would, but I can’t exactly tell you, so instead I just lounge on your bed and I text you:

ME: Hey lovely.

YOU: hey!

ME: What are you up to?

YOU: well it’s 8 pm

YOU: so nm

YOU: watching this dutch talk show w my grandpa

YOU: hes annoyed im on my phone lol

ME: Go watch the show, (Y/n). I don’t want to piss off your grandfather before I even get there.

YOU: yessir! love u

ME: I love you, too.

I am so tired. I was hoping we could call for a little bit, but if you're at your grandparents’ house, I don't want to push it. Instead I take a shower in your bathroom and use your soap so I smell like you. Then, in my own, clean clothes which I keep at your place, I get on your bed and take out your laptop.

As always, your WhatsApp texts are open. I haven't checked them much since we got together - we are good together and I don't need to know everything you talk about with everyone - but there are new texts from a name I don't recognize.

And you are texting this person right now. I thought you couldn't be on your phone?

The texts are in Dutch, but they started about an hour ago and there aren't that many yet, so I take the time to translate them.

MITCH: hey hey! heard you're in NL? wanna get together?

YOU: sorry man, kinda busy

MITCH: ouch. did you just blow me off?

YOU: uhhhh kinda?

YOU: it's nothing personal

YOU: my boyfriend’s coming in 2 days

I smile.

MITCH: since when do you have a boyfriend lol

YOU: a few months now

MITCH: and i guess it’s serious?

YOU: pretty serious

MITCH: wtf

YOU: ?

MITCH: i kinda thought we had a thing, you know?

YOU: mitch…

YOU: you gotta get over this

MITCH: and what is it you think i have to ‘get over’?

YOU: you know what

That last message, you sent while I was reading the other ones, and I have to translate it separately. Apparently Mitch does know what, because he doesn’t respond anymore. But I don’t know what, and I really wish you would specify.

You send a message to Nadia:

YOU: guess who just texted me…

NADIA: Who?

YOU: mitch

NADIA: Ew. Block him.

Thank you, Nadia!

YOU: i can’t just block him 😭 you know what happens when i block him

NADIA: You want to stay at my place tonight?

YOU: could i? i don’t wanna tell my grandparents about this…

NADIA: Hey, at least Joe will be here soon! Then you won’t be all alone in your big scary AirBNB.

YOU: lol

YOU: i can’t wait tho

YOU: 😁😊

I frown. Normally I’d be happy that you can’t wait for me to get there, but right now I just want to know who this Mitch guy is.

He is not on your Twitter and he is not on Nadia’s Instagram. All I have are his texts to you and looking for his number on Google does absolutely nothing.

But when I look up your high school, along with Mitch’s name and yours, I finally find something interesting: two news articles with your names in them.

I Google your name again. There’s your high school picture. You went to Het Nehalennia College but when I try to translate the rest of the text again, I still can’t make sense of it - it must be full of spelling errors, because some words just will not make sense.

I try to look Mitch up, using all sorts of combinations. Your school and his name, his name and yours... Nothing.

From: Omroep Zeeland, June 21st, 2017

KOEWACHT - YESTERDAY AT 3:00 in the afternoon, high school student at Nehalennia College, Mitch Wegganger, was arrested on suspicion of stalking and attempted assault against his classmate, (Y/n) (Y/l/n). The stalking allegedly started after (Y/l/n) stood up for Wegganger against a classmate in March. (Y/l/n) did not return our requests for comment.

From: Omroep Zeeland, June 23rd, 2017

KOEWACHT - HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT Mitch Wegganger - who was arrested early this week on suspicion of stalking his classmate (Y/n) (Y/l/n) - was released this morning after (Y/l/n) withdrew her report. Wegganger: “This is all a huge misunderstanding. I didn't stand outside (Y/n)'s house and hurt her. I just wanted to talk to her.”

(Y/l/n) is still unavailable for comment.

I can’t believe this.

You, (Y/n), have a stalker.

And you didn’t tell me about him.

[gadmiral-thrawn]

O Y FUCKING GOD THIS IS OT MY MCR BLOG IF I FOLLOW U D U GO ON HIS AND WONDER WHO TF R U GO TO Y MCR BLOG CAN-U-NOT-14 (i think) OK!!!!!

FREE PALESTINE

zionists get lost

All about my least fav person - me:

Call me Rev or one of my usernames ig. My real names Zara tho so u an call that to idrc

Killjoy name ig: Atomic Revolution (cheesy ik but its the only thing i can think off)

She/her 🇮🇳

Livin a very sandy life in 🇰🇼

Im a minor so luck off creepy ppl

Idc what u say to me tho as long as its not creepy

Palestine Blogs:

This place here is for as u can guess Palestine. Here I'm gonna put the vlogs of some ppl in Gaza to maybe just spread the msg a bit more. I cant rlly donate rn so i figured its the best i could do :). If u want ur blog to be here just send me a msg or an ask.

@save-mohammad-family

@hanaayousef

@adham-89

@maxwell-o

My Current Interests:

THRAWN

THRAWN

THRAWN

Hes my fav star wars character (as u can tell) and by longest and most recurring obsession

Thennnn we have F1

Currently rooting for more McLaren podiums and hoping Lando One-win gets more then just one win

GO PAPAYAS

Some Bands Im Into:

MCR, fall out boy, green day, nirvana, coldplay, ice one kills, panic at the disco, the used and just rlly anything that makes u want to punch someone.

Some stuff about me:

I have an insane amount of knowledge on MCR andd Kurt Cobain

I recently bought a guitar and im trash at it so if u guys have my tips pls tell 😭

I REALLY love horror movies

Im a twin - trust me its not what u think it is. It is HORRID

My fav color would be black, red or blue

Fav restaurant is Dampa Feast (yay seafoooodddd)

I collect Funkos (gonna add my collection soon)

Where else can u find me?

Discord: gadmiral_thrawn_37075

Ao3: g_admiralthrawn

Thinking of writing some stuff on ao3?

Making an Instagram too (not posted anything yet still needs a shit ton of work it here it is): fvckofagvn

Chiss Discord server: https://discord.com/invite/bQn42uMb

SO LONG AND GOODNIGHT

[sakasakiii]

Hi!

I love your work!! Your art is very pretty. Do you have a specific idea of how old everyone is ? Do you lean more towards canon or do you have your own dates in mind ? If don’t wanna a answer it’s ok!

Hope u have a nice day

(Remember to drink water!)

hiiii nonnie!!! thank you for checking in, and im happy u like the stuff i put out!! when it comes to ages, it's difficult to answer sometimes bc of the way professor tolkien's timeline is-- it makes gauging one singular place where most of the cast can be compared something that makes my tired brain go 😵🤧🤕 but i love the prompt youve given! and thus heres my attempt at it

with most of my tolkien stuff, i always try to stick to canon wherever possible emphasis is on try lmao and the topic of ages is one such place. i do make exceptions to the Professor's canon sometimes for a few reasons: 1) i like some of the scrapped ideas in his drafts, or 2) i just prefer other options. with ages, i think the only charas with canon-established ages i deviated from are fingolfin, finrod, turgon, and aredhel. i try to keep cases like these minimal tho, so i hope it doesn't bother anyone too much... 👉👈

anyways i figured just dropping a list of numbers would be kinda boring to look at so heres an illustrated guide to what the ~rough~ ages of the finweans are in my head whenever i write or draw. Y.T. 1495 (the year Finwe dies) is the controlled medium ive used to enable a fair comparison of the Finweans

note: "born Y.T. xxx" means this is the canon date of birth listed on Tolkien Gateway. "est. born [xxx]" means this is a noncanon estimate:

the First Age gets a lot more muddled from there due to the hullaballoo of everything going on, so ill only be including the doriathrim and a few other denizens of nargothrond:

it's mostly the older elves that are more undefined/vague with their ages (i.o.w. others like elwing, earendil, the peredhil twins, and most Men all have set dates of birth), so they're all i'll be doing for now. but it's that vagueness which makes hcing all the more enjoyable, isn't it! plus since we’re on this subject, under the cut are just a few headcanons and musings ive had that i wanted to put somewhere 😙

Finarfin and Earwen were born within months of each other! Finwe and Olwe made a Really Big Deal out of when they found out their wives were pregnant at the same time. As a result, the two were often sent on many playdates with each other to “bolster healthy relations” between the Noldor and the Teleri. It wasn’t an arranged marriage situation, but I like to think they were goofy for each other from the start… Resulting in the two eventually getting married as soon as they came of age, the fastest out of all of Finwe’s kids to do so. 

The reason the Ambarussa are significantly younger than the other Finweans (especially the Feanorians-- there’s a 100 Valian year gap between them and Curufin alone!) is because I imagine they were accidental babies that even Feanor didn’t expect to conceive. too bad morgoth said "its morgin time!" and started Messing Things Up shortly afterwards.....

Anaire was Lalwen's good friend long before she married Fingolfin; they met through Lalwen who wingmanned Fingolfin the whole time. i like think Anaire'd be the best out of all the wives at keeping good, healthy bonds with all the women of her family :DD

luthien's potential 姐姐/big sis dynamic with all the younger doriathrim elves is something i daydream about a lot 😌 but sometimes the fact that she's older than finarfin keeps me up at night

this has been really fun, so thanks again for asking-- annnd yessir, i am chugging water as i write this so you better be doing the same ❤️ have a great start to your week!

[sunniques]

hello munch hee anon has returned from the dead 😓 been cooped up with an essay that's due in a week but im still stressing cus my prof did not reply to me abt what i need to do so im all alone in the dark sobs like it's to the point that i even dreamt abt it kabwksbdksndkdndmx but whatever soz for the dumping

in other news tho i have brainworms for u!!!! teehee

been thinking abt size kink with hoon :3 he's been working out lately n Trust that you've noticed your boyfriend slowly bulking up as the days pass, what with your lingering gaze trailing across his arms whenever he so much as moves them simply. and of course sunghoon being the attentive boyfriend he is noticed You too. at first he's a bit flustered, the attention making his cheeks flush, but soon enough he's purposely flexing his biceps to see you worked up, a slight smirk decorating his pretty features whenever he takes note of how you swallow and rub your thighs together from his peripheral. he pretends like it doesn't affect him too though, especially when your small hands touch his even larger ones, or how much taller he is when he towers over you to fetch the mug you need from the top cabinets.

it's only when he's tangled up in your shared bedroom's sheets with you, cock thrusting in and out that his urges get the best of him, because god— you look so fucking tiny compared to his figure, your pretty little tits bouncing in his face, your parted red lips dropping sweet moans and of course, your precious cunt that's sucking him in with every drag of his against your warm walls. he can't stop himself from wrapping his large, cold fingers against your throat, twitching inside of you when your wide, doe eyes look up at him in shock. he doesn't miss the way you clench around him when his grip tightens around your flesh though, watching the way you revel in how he restricts your airflow and lets your brain turn to mush.

"that's it, pretty. like when hoonie wraps his big hands around you? don't think i haven't seen you gawking at me when i come back from the gym. you think you're slick, but i know this hungry pussy wants me to pound her against the wall with nothing but my strong arms to holding you up, hm? don't worry, angel. you'll get your wish. just cum for me, and we'll play out all those filthy thoughts that have been going on in your head lately."

end scene. bows. thank u for coming to the munch hee thoughts convention we hope to see u again 😇😇

hi lovely!! glad to see you in my inbox! and i really hope you’re making sure to take care of yourself because i know how stressful school can be :( i’ll be cheering you on and wishing you all the best!

you always eat so hard with these thoughts like 🧎‍♀️

and size kink really fits Sunghoon like he would be so into it. he’s the type to glide his big cock through your pussy lips while teasing you about how he wonders if your cute little pussy can take his cock. he’ll fuck you in every position possible until your tight hole is nice and stretched out

[dragon-fuccer]

Hi!!! If u're reading this u're probably the author of this absolutely amazing fic ✨

And if u're not, go read it;!! It's so good u won't regret it<33

First some fanart jumpscare !!! (I hope u're ok w it bc I haven't asked for permission 😭)

It's just how I imagine Jack to look with a few smaller headcannons based on the fic, and there will be more fic related doodles soon, so prepare for that >;D (ofc as long as u're ok with it!!)

Second, the thing I lured ya here with, aka mine n my bfs ocs, art and description for ya to use in the fic if u want to ^^

TYSM for this offer, both me and my bf feel hella honored and it actually gave us a ton of motivation to actually expand on these two!

Tws : body horror, brief description of violence n death, mentioned suicide and brief description of murder

Smokey belongs to my bf and Something is mine !

Normal text is all written by me and green text was written by him ^^

Art and design by my dearly beloved:

Smokey

Real name : Victor Wilson

Age : around 26 yo

possible victor lore

used to be victor by marble hornets standards known as smokey

a dropout uni student with raging nicotine addiction (smokey did not retain any uni info but vic used to be psych student (projecting much lol))

prolly watched marble hornets with friends for fun and against better judgement decided to give a visit to rosswood park thinking its a film project in the beginning

turns out its not and they spotted the lanky guy

smokey the horror movie enthusiast wants out at that point before shize goes down but its late and they r deep in the forest so comes to conclusion they r all p much dead at this point

peeps want to go hunt for the lanky man cus cool and internet views

my guy is like f that yall r following basic horror lore of everyone dies im not playin like that and straight up says hes not going and hed rather go and sleep in the burned down psych ward

he gets called a wimp but decides if hes gonna die hes not dying an idiot and decides to vidtape everything on his mid tier phone camera

not sure what happens to the rest but they do their meet cute w slendy and prolly with time like half of em ends up in the arko e way or another

smokey manages most of the night fine but like luck would have it still end up meeting the guy

does not go well

wakes up in the burned down hospital not remembering the last unknown time and broken phone beyond repair

decides oho this is bad lets go back to uni and never talk abt it

meets with most friends back at uni but like 2 of em r missing and they just pretend nothing happened, friend group dissolves

after that he starts slowly having memory gaps, waking up in other places

all comes to head when it turns out he missed 5 months of uni after he wakes up back in rosswood really far from home and skinnier than ever and suddenly no more uni student

after that victor surfaces less and less till hes just kinda gone at that point

Smokey first shows up the night victor goes with friends to rosewood

in the beginning surfaces confused unsure who they are and what is their purpose

with time smokey goes through both phone and computer of vics

binges whole marble hornets in one sitting and decides he has a personal vendetta against the operator

since then they work on somehow stoping it (and terribly fails given the lack of information) leading to continuous trips back to rosewood and sleepovers in the rubble of the ex psych ward

figuring out the nicotine addiction takes a bit of time and leads to pretty nasty withdrawal symptoms as well as a very wrecked dorm room (he does find the cigarettes tho and is smart enough to connect the dots (smart cookie, here have a star sticker))

smokey learns asl and isolates themself a lot in the months of operator research

he still maintains two personas to some extends which is one the masked smokey who uses mostly asl and rarely speaks (to some extent also a tactic against being caught by police) and times when he goes without mask on library searches and grocery shoppings

smokey starts a yt channel dedicated to catching the operator and ending it which attracts at best some people commenting on obvious marble hornets ripoff and few cents into his wallet

with passing time they do start finding victims in order to keep themselves alive n appease the the big slinky leading to series of alleged suicides then turned to series of murders

he starts off with two of his ex friends who go back to rosewood and start showing symptoms he learned from mh

When they commit murder they hide in the trunk of the car and basically hotbox the whole thing due to smoking making the victim whoozy and confused, moving on they connect a pipe (like garden hose or whatevs) to the exhaustion pipe and suffocate their victims with the car smoke

the thing that tips off the police is the nicotine in the system of every victim and an account of almost to be one that got stalked by smokey who upon being discovered (also while smoking and which earned him the name) decided to bolt

since then he continues on just about the same, aka researching the operator, finding new victims and surviving untill they meet Something

His hoodie is dark green, the mask is greyish from the grime n dirt, the big cross on it is black so are his pants and hair

Something

Real name : Rae Dyer

Age : 23 before transformation, currently unknown

Something used to be a cryptid fan. They worked at a radio station and had a small night show where they played old rock and often rambled about the latest creature they heard about. While out, looking for a new creature to maybe see, they stumbled upon the Slenderman and became obsessed to document it somehow, quickly spiraling out of control and slowly, bit by bit became a creature themselves.

Something doesn't remember much from it's past life. It used to just wander, guided by the static in it's head towards it's victims, always terrified itself but not knowing why. After Smokey found it, they started wandering together. At first they had serious communication issues - Something only able to speak in tap code and Smokey mainly using ASL - but with time they learned to speak with each other, and now they can understand the other almost without words.

Something doesn't really eat, it survives on fear and between itself and Smokey, it always has more than enough of it. It does steal food for Smokey tho, cigarettes as well, usually leaving them in whatever ruined building he decided to stay in for the night. Something got also addicted to nicotine by just being around Smokey so much, leading to separation anxiety fueled by withdrawal when they're apart.

Something cannot speak, and can only communicate using tap code. When it's particularly worried or scared it does emit a small noise, that sounds like a particularly breathy whine, and more commonly when it tries to speak, quiet spider like ticking can be heard coming from it's mouths.

It usually walks hunched over, used to having to duck under branches, entryways, etc bc of it's height.

Something has pale skin reminiscent of porcelain, and is usually wearing a v neck sweater with a white undershirt and jeans or other pants. It's hair is very thin and scarce, floating around it's head down to it's lower back

Also a tiny doodle bonus of how I imagine these two showing up on Jacks doorstep xjbxbcbcb

We think the most probable case of them showing up would be Smokey getting bonked on a mission (probably by a car or a would be victim) and Something bringing them over to Jacks cabin to get pached up, tho feel free to do something else ya might think fits =w=

Again, thank you so much for the offer, we're both so honored to have the opportunity to show these two off and maybe if you're so inclined getting them a chapter in ur amazing fic<3

If u have any questions you need answered Abt the two don't hesitate to ask them as well! ^^

-Kai n Bean

[dullahandyke]

yippee yippee yippee yippee eimear con haul!!!!

Hi. It was my birthday recently and I'm bad to shop for so instead of gifts I got money to spend at Kaizokucon. So here's a haul. Under the cut bcos I couldnt fit it nicely in one picture and I wanna ramble

ok we're gonna take it one picture at a time ^_^ the ID in the alt text explains what everything is if u just wanna see what i got without the rambling sure to come with it. links in rambling r to the artists of the fan stuff where i can find em ^_^ only one of them is a direct link to the product tho bcos some ppls shops r down and some ppl dont have all their stuff online. lemons_arent_green youre a real one

Ok the flat stuff!!! black rock shooter poster bcos i already have a figure but i liek her... badass anime girl ily.... was so so sure i saw a reigen keychain but when i went to go get one there weren't any so i got this sticker sheet instead :3 SPEAKING OF KEYCHAINS!!! yippee yippee kaguya i love you youre my special little tiempsy. yue you are a gay anime boy with a cool design. tomoyo ive always felt a kinship with you and its because im a desperate dyke. monokuma is here ig 🙄 i put him on my carabiner and hes fun to stim with. i am not immune to the sdr2 fanboying. also full disclosure ive not watched naruto (its in the spreadsheet) i just thought funko pop sasuke keychain was really really funny. my son who stares into my soul. comparatively i dont have as much to say on the badges!! luka luka fever for real girlie ily. the bandori ones were blind bags and i got himari on my first try <3<3<3<3<3<3 sorry eve i kind of dont care. 🙁 the dr girlies i kinda picked at random based on who i've been vibing w lately.

THE POKEMON DIORAMA!!!! its soooo cool, staff were setting up the trade hall so i was in there all day friday and this shop was one of the first to set up their stands and i was literally staring at it all day... so fucking awesome. the rings n the necklace r from the same shop look at them... im fucking obsessed w the catgirl necklace. literally look at her. i dont thiiink shes supposed to be a specific character but she might be. oh well. cat girl ily. aaaand the arisa stand is actually a little clip for papers n stuff!! she was also a blind box but specifically for popipa so i was gonna b happy w whoever <3

MIIIIKUUUUUU MY PRINCESS MY EVERYTHING!!!!! she was calling to me she beckoned..... shes actually rlly big irl shes the biggest figure i have, replacing my kokoro one... shes the one where i audibly said 'it was my birthday i can buy things' bcos figures spencey... she wasnt too bad actually i just like bitching. 6 euro axel for scale

BOOKS 💥💥💥 i was reading nana a while back and i dropped it but i gotta pick it up again... rlly pretty and awesome... aaaand the summer hikaru died!!! kay if youre seeing this then know you posting abt it convinced me <3 i originally got it bcos i was on door duty in a quiet area and didnt wanna spend my time draining battery life on my phone but after i bought it i realised that that was literally a terrible idea so <3 we'll get around to them soon

FINALLLYYYYYY TSHIRTS!!! the top yellow one was my staff t-shirt, it has 'staff' on the back i was wearing it all weekend and yippee i love it.... emotional bond.... and if this is a safe space can i just say. if kaito was a woman? would. next up FAYE FUCKIN VALENTINEEEE!!! do u remember that post i made going thru all the sellers that were gonna b at the con that started like 'i hate shounen fans. name a woman'? well this is the seller i was talking about but all was forgiven in the name of FAYE ! GODDAMN ! VALENTINE ! ugh i love you girlie. and the last t-shirt was given out free to staff after the closing ceremony!! it was the tenth anniversary of kaizokucon so we got this awesomes design yay.... wore it to classes today hoping somebody would comment on it and nobody did 😌and in the middle i got CLOW CARRRDS BITCHES!!!!!! i saw them and immediately all thought left my fucking brain. i needed them. so important. the seller also recognised the axel in my fanny pack yippee!!!! a few people recognised him over the weekend actually and i was always like yes!! the him

anyway. yippee! yippee! yippee! yippee! yippee! yippee! yippee! yippee! yippee! con con con con con :)

[malevolantkitcheen]

MY APOLOGIES IF THIS BOTHERS YOU BUT MAY I PLEASE GET A MATCHUP HAVE A WONDERFUL NIGHT OR DAY REGARDLESS <33 (any gender and doesnt matter if it’s platonic or romantic)

I’m an ENFP 7w6 my friends describe me as the mother friend for some reason but it’s probably bc I’m an older sister and basically become my younger sisters mother since my parents tend to be busy with work.

Despite being the ‘mother’ friend I like to tease my friends a lot LIKE A LOT I will combust if I do not get to tease my friend for a day but other than that I’m pretty approachable and friendly (even tho my friends tell me I have a resting bitch face)

Likes : Socialising, analysing people (it’s a really weird thing I do but I like analysing people and figuring out what their humour and personalities are), COFFEE. I drank it so much people had to ban me from it.., Rewatching comfort shows and listening to others interest it’s quite nice to just sit back and listen to people talk for ages.

Dislikes : Stuff half opened or half closed like it irritates me more that it should </3, Self absorbed people.. Like the ones that think the world revolves around them, too judgmental people, negative emotions I absolutely despise expressing them it feels too tiring.

I THINK THATS ALL SORRY FOR WASTING UR TIME AND I HOPE U HAVE THE BESTEST BESTEST DAY OF UR LIFE SOON AND MAY U ACHIEVE UR DREAMS BYEEEE (MY ENGLISH SUCKS SO MUCH IM SO SORRY)

For Jujutsu Kaisen i match you with…

Maki Zen’in

-You and Maki had been good friends since starting out at Jujutsu Tech. You hadn’t really known anyone else but there was something about her that stood out to you, she had a strong aura. The two of you made a great team, so much so that nobody really caused any problems for either of you, especially due to Maki’s often abrupt responses. She could often be a bit short fused but you were always her voice of reason, even if she didn’t feel like taking your advice that day. It truly felt like you and Maki may as well be attached at the hip.

-Every time that you and Maki would go out, you would always try to find a new cafe to try. It was a weekly occurrence in which you would religious get lunch and a coffee. Whilst waiting for food and drinks, you and Maki would try and guess things about the lives of people passing by, most of which ended up just being silly. You loved the way that she would become so invested into each person, writing their narratives as she spoke, which was often broken by moments of laughter. Maki was a pretty serious individual so being able to see her like this truly made your day, your whole week even. Once arriving at home, the two of you would pick up where you left off on the latest show you were watching, always making sure to bring lots of snacks. Sometimes these hangouts would turn into binge watching a particular show or diving deep into lore and backgrounds of each character, psychoanalysing the ones that sparked your interest. You always made sure to interject with some ridiculous theory idea because you knew that Maki would react every single time, it would never result in petty bickering or anything of the sort; it would always just end up with you rolling around with laughter and Maki trying her best to remain serious.

[mlkbwunnies]

hello, cutie ying!!!

it's my turn to drop by in your inbox, especially since you sent me such a sweet and darling letter.

i know you've been super busy irl, and i want to let you know that it's so admirable how you're able to bring so much positivity and light onto this platform, despite how exhausted you probably are. i love all of the self-ship content you put out, and how you encourage others to be confident and proud in their self-ships as well. you also have the most delicate writing style ever – it's so gentle and soothing, yet very fragile and sensitive. i hope you know that, just by your actions, you're undoubtedly a very lovely person.

i also hope that 19 is treating you well!!! i know growing up can be daunting, but as something who is almost 21, i can tell you that nothing really changed when i turned 20, for better or for worse lol if i had to give one piece of advice, tho, it'd be to figure out what kind of person you want to be and realllllyyyy stick to it. like determine your non-negotiables, discover things that you truly care about, etc. don't let others who put you and the people/things you love about down into your life - let them and their words go as soon as possible. i think it's a wonderful thing to have as much love for others as you do, so make sure you're investing that love into individuals who want and appreciate it!

def did not mean for this to turn into a big sister-esque rant. point is, if you ever need a listening ear, always know that i'm just a discord message away <3 you've got this, so keep your chin up, love yourself hard even when others won't or can't, and i hope you have a wonderful new year!!!! may 2025 treat you with never-ending gentleness and kindness, and take care of yourself!

- carrot 🥕

my sweet carrot . . when i tell you i teared up when i started reading this message !!!! :( thank you thank you thank you so much for all your kind words . . you said that may 2025 treat me with neverending gentleness and kindness– i think it is you that's treating me with all that !!! and i can only hope to return the same amount of love (if not tenfold!!) to you !!! ♡ the advice u gave is so good what T_T i'll remember this as i step into my twenties ahhh . . identity has been a big thing to ponder about and it makes so much sense :') thank u so much carrot :""-) you are so endlessly patient and kind – there is so much love in you and it is so so so evident in all your interactions with everyone eeeee . . i appreciate this big sister message with all the love within me and i hope u kno that im here for you too hehehe c: thank you thank u thank you . . i hope that 2025 is just as lovely and kind to you as you have been with all of us eeee !!! ♡

[cherry-bloooom]

HI THEREEE this is my first oc story that im gonna post here teehee! originally wrote in a notebook as like a rough draft then perfected it in google docs and it took me like 2 days to do so/ ~4 or 5 hours.. rough draft was written all in one sitting tho LOL took around 2 hours.

this is abt my oc percy being an asshole to his girlfriend at the time, michelle, my other oc, and him being a huge nasty slob. that’s kinda it. takes place around 2016/2017.

CONTENT WARNINGS IF U NEED IT:

alcohol/drinking, drugs, dv, rape/coercion, nsfw, slight mention of homophobia technically?? it’s literally one sentence. fortnite /j

ok hope u like it hehe love u bye click read more now to read…

Percy’s Perspective thing… idk what to call it

word count: 6.1k

I came home from a long morning of running around town taking care of errands. Rubin’s birthday is coming up soon, so my parents made me come over to their place for brunch to help them make plans for him, figure out what to get him. Right after I left, I had to grab something to eat. I was starving even though I’d just gotten done eating with my parents. I stopped at the ghetto McDonald’s me and Michelle go to. Every time we go, she complains about it, but we always end up going anyway. I came home right after that but was so mentally exhausted from being out, I couldn’t help but just lay on the couch.

Michelle was at work, like she always is around this time. I feel she works too much. She comes home stressed out nearly every day, and it never fails to ruin our night in together (never out, because she’s too stressed to even go out of the house). I try to have nice, romantic nights with her, but it seems she wants no part of it when I make an effort. It feels like she’s always resisting, for some reason. Things used to be so different between us. We always had great nights when she got off work, even when she got home late or tired or stressed, and things would be perfectly fine. But lately, she’s just been so distant and moody all the time. We’re always arguing over the little things, like when she accuses me of leaving the apartment a mess, or that I don’t help her out with anything. I feel like those criticisms are a bit undeserved. She has no idea what I do when she’s at work all day, and how stressful it can be sometimes. Like, for example, she knows how much I hate my parents, but it seems like every other day I have to spend money on an Uber to get to their house fifteen minutes away just to discuss a random ass topic they couldn’t stomach doing over the phone or text. God, even an email would be easier than the shit they pull. Or, she knows how much I hate Rubin, but I’m forced to basically babysit him for Mom and Dad while they sit on their asses and do nothing all day at work. They seriously lack the mental capacity to understand how annoying he is, and how annoying it is to hang out with him or bring him over to the apartment. They always say, “But Percy, he’s your baby brother!” But to that I say, “fuck off.” Just because I happened to be born before him doesn’t mean he’s my responsibility now. I don’t even get paid for it. I thought my babysitting days were over once I moved out, but I guess not! Halle-fucking-lujah. And she also knows how worried I am about my Overwatch league, and how often I have to practice for it. I love doing it, don’t get me wrong, it’s fun, but I hate always being glued to the computer like that. I know I gotta make some real money off of this soon, but it just stresses me out so much. Michelle really has no idea what it’s like for me, being home all day, all my duties. I wish she would give me the benefit of the doubt, just once. All she does is accuse and get mad at me for things I didn’t even contribute to.

I just wish things could go back to how they were with Michelle, my Mika, when we first met back in college, and every time we spoke sparks flew instantly. Even a year ago, things were different between us. We used to have romantic nights out, and cuddly movie nights on the couch, but now those have turned into cold, empty looks and heated arguments. That spark I loved so much is fading, and I want it back, so, so bad.

In all my sulking on the couch, I was interrupted by a notification on my phone. I reached for it, and quickly looked at the text– It was from my old college buddy Alex, in the group chat with my whole college friend group.

“Still up for tonight guys?”

Fuuuuuuuck. I had totally forgotten that I had plans with the guys for tonight. It was supposed to be all of us– me, Alex, Josh, and Andrew– going out to some bar downtown. I couldn’t remember the name of the place, let alone what time we were supposed to meet up, and couldn’t bother to check the message history and find out. Soon, the other guys chimed in confirming they were going, first Andrew, then Josh, leaving only me. I quickly thought of an excuse to not go.

“Sorry guys, my girl said I couldn’t tonite. Too dangerous to get home drunk and she has work in the morning, can't pick me up that late. Maybe another time,” is the best I could come up with.

They all typed their cries of disappointment, me remaining silent in the chat. That was until Andrew, the motherfucker, suggested we just come to my place. That way, I wouldn’t need to worry about getting home. Amazing, just what I wanted him to say.

“Yeah, sure. Be here by 4.”

They asked the address, I sent it, then turned my phone off and threw it to the other end of the couch, sighing loudly as I did. Putting my head in my hands, I thought of what to do. God, I hated hanging out with them. They haven’t matured whatsoever from when we were in college, and it’s like having a bunch of little Rubin’s running around whenever I’m with them. Constantly having to remind them to stop being so loud, so rambunctious, so, well, annoying. It reminds me of high school, where I’d be sitting at a table, minding my business, then suddenly people are flinging food at each other and screaming like banshees in heat, and I’m just sitting there, calm, collected, and irritated as fuck. I can’t stand them, I find it hard to relate to them, they’re all so immature for their ages. The only reason I wanted to go out was because we’d be drinking, and it would be fun and more tolerable. I was gonna try to pretend I didn’t know them, and wasn’t with them, and just have an excuse to get out of the house and relax on my own. Now that they’re coming here, and I doubt they’d be bringing anything with them, it’ll just be me and 3 other guys sitting in my living room like we’re boyscouts about to tell a campfire story. Is it really too late to cancel? Maybe something happened to Michelle at work, and they couldn’t come… No, because then, I’d have to keep up the lie. Ugh, god damnit.

I looked around the tiny living room, with our much too big TV and our much too small TV stand, that held my Xbox and my games, and a big bluetooth speaker I ordered for myself off Amazon. I looked at the floor, and at the loveseat where Michelle does all her reading. The house was a bit messy, but I had better things to worry about right now. I needed to start thinking about refreshments. I trudged into the kitchen and investigated our fridge, first. All I saw was a half empty 2 liter of Pepsi, some chinese takeout boxes, some chicken breasts, a barely touched gallon of milk, my case of Redbulls, Michelle’s leftover Starbucks from the other day, some steaks, some lettuce, condiments and dressings, and baby carrots. Nothing good in here, really. Then, I checked the pantry– pasta, crackers, cereal, Michelle’s spices, breadcrumbs, rice, a few picked through bags of chips, bread, 3 packs of ramen, and other random nonperishables. Not much else in here, either, I guess. I rustled around some more until I saw, in the way, way back of the pantry, a bottle of wine me and Michelle were saving for a special occasion, our anniversary, or a date night, or something. The wine itself was nothing special. It was a bottle of Barefoot, I think it was, like, fifteen dollars. Maybe I could bring this out for me and the guys tonight, to make it a little more bearable for myself. I have a feeling me and Michelle won’t be enjoying it any time soon, with how she’s been acting as of late. I know the guys aren’t huge fans of wine, but unless one of them wants to bring a six pack, then it’s just gonna have to do. I grabbed the bottle and set it on the counter, and reached in the cabinet and pulled out four wine glasses for each of us, so I wouldn’t forget to later. It’s only about two o’clock. I have some time to relax before they get here.

I pace around the apartment, completely dreading their arrival. I wish Michelle were here, so I could ask her what to do. I would call, but she never answers the phone at work. She really does work too much. I look back at the wine bottle sat out on the kitchen counter, and daydream about how nice it would be to enjoy that bottle with her. I’ll try to conserve the wine, and I think tonight, after the guys leave, and when she gets home from work, we’re gonna have a nice, relaxing night together, and we’ll talk through all the issues we’ve been having over that wine. I wanna spoil her tonight. I hope she’ll appreciate it.

I continued my pacing, and after checking the clock on the stove, I saw around thirty minutes went by. It’s almost 2:45, meaning I have about an hour to prepare myself. I’ve been eyeing the wine the whole time I paced, it looks really, really good. I pick up the bottle from the counter and start inspecting it. “Red Moscato” was the flavor, it’s deep red color making it look like some kind of fruit punch, or kinda like blood. Under the flavor, the tagline says, “Deliciously Sweet.” I’m not usually a fan of sweet drinks, but hey, it’s alcohol. In my mind, I considered popping it open early and drinking a little before the guys get here, but quickly swept the thought away, remembering how I wanted to save some for me and Michelle. Besides, I’ll have a little when the guys get here too, that’s when I’ll really need it. I continue to pace.

About fifteen minutes go by. It’s exactly 3:02. The bottle keeps enticing me. It really does look like blood, doesn’t it? I start to think about what it’ll be like when they get here. Their grating laughs, their irritating faces. Just the thought makes me wanna scream. I consider drinking it again, this time those images flashing through my head, my mind filled with dread. Maybe it’ll soften the blow when they get here. It’s now a toss up in my mind– but I knew my answer as soon as the question popped into my head again. Before I knew it I was pouring myself a decently sized glass, all for myself. It should be fine, there’s a lot left. With the first sip, my nerves relaxed, the bitterness of the alcohol adjusting them back into place. I almost chugged out of the glass, just standing right there in the kitchen. The glass was nearly empty by the time I was done with that huge first sip, so I refilled it and took my glass and the bottle back to the living room with me. I sat back and kicked my feet up, now properly able to relax.

Around 3:40 or so I heard a knock at the door. They’re here already? I groaned as it took me out of my tipsy buzzy high, and I reluctantly left the couch with a sigh to answer the door. Stumbling on the way there, I opened the door, and saw it was Andrew, the very kind, considerate guy, who kindly and courteously suggested we come to my house, without asking me first, before suggesting it. How lovely. He greets me with a pat on my back, and I notice in his hand he’s holding a six pack of Modelo. Thank fucking god, that wine was too good I almost didn’t wanna share it with these idiots. Being considerate, though, I took his beer and stuck it in the fridge, and led him to the living room, letting him know there’s already some wine in there if he wanted it, hoping in my head he didn’t.

We made small talk on the couch until I heard another knock at the door. I got up, and Andrew followed. Nearly stumbling again, I opened the door and greeted Josh, the most palatable of the bunch. He held a huge tote bag filled with snacks, as if he’d stopped at the store before coming here.

“I wasn’t sure what you had, so, I brought a little of everything, heh,” he explained. Did he not expect me to have anything here already? I sort of appreciated the sentiment, but felt a little disrespected at the same time. Andrew greeted him at the door, giving him the same pat on the back he gave me. Must be some kind of tradition among young men I’m not aware of. They started talking as they stood in the kitchen, and I barely paid any attention, until Alex showed up in the open door frame, greeting us by holding his hands in the air, one holding a drawstring bag and the other holding a case of Corona Light. The 3 stooges began hollering in excitement, huddling up and chanting and jumping up and down to celebrate their hang out sesh. I winced and my ears rang, taking the case of Coronas and placing it next to the Modelos in the fridge. They finally died down and migrated to the living room, and I reluctantly followed.

Twenty minutes have passed, and we’ve already each cracked open a Corona or two, or in my case, 3. They were sipping at them between words, and I sat there silently drinking, quick enough to get drunk as fast as possible and slow enough to not chug it. I’m zoned out, tipsy, and barely paying any attention to the conversation. I hear the chatter, but don’t know what they’re saying, until Alex brings me back.

“Hey, who brought this shitty wine?” He called out, looking to the group, laughing patronizingly. The others laughed with him and they all looked around, apart from Andrew.

“Oh, that was just some stuff I had lying around.. I didn’t feel like going out again today,” I explained, wanting to end it right then and there.

“Dude, this is some fuckin’… Some chick shit!” They all cackled. “What, are you fucking gay or something, man?” The cackling got louder. I took a large sip from my bottle in response.

Andrew opened his big mouth, “No, dude, doesn’t he have a girlfriend or something?” He stifled a chuckle.

“Yeah,” I responded, without a hint of humor in my voice.

“Bro, I forgot you had a girl, man,” Josh said. I don’t know how that’s possible, when I said it was the reason I couldn’t go out. Fucking idiot. “How are y’all doing together?” He slurred out.

I questioned whether to be truthful or to let the question pass by without giving a clear answer, but I’m drunk enough that my real answer comes out without me even realizing I’m talking. “Well..” I started, voice low and words slurring. “She’s… She’s been stressed, with work and stuff, recently, and, uh… Well, we’ve been kinda, um,” my eyes widened and I exaggerated a loud sigh. “She’s been kinda pissed off with me lately. I don’t know.. She’s always complainin’ about something.”

Alex responded, “Well that’s just women, man, that’s just how they are,” he waved his hands in the air, as if to brush it off and say it wasn’t my fault. “That’s why I can’t do none of that lovey-dovey shit. Either she’s mad at me for doin’ somethin’ stupid, or I’m mad at her for doin’ somethin’ stupid. I just.. I just can’t do it.”

Josh raised his drink in the air, said, “Shit, I’ll drink to that,” and let out a stifled laugh. Andrew lifted his drink slightly as well. I stayed still.

Alex continued, “Women are just bitches, man. Personally, what I do, is, I just pump and dump, y’know what I’m sayin’?” He sticks out his tongue, and starts making a thrusting motion, laughing. Andrew and Josh drunkenly cackle. I stayed silent and just nodded along. “But really, man, that.. that blows. I’m sorry. That fucking blows.” He then reached over the arm of the couch, and lifted his drawstring bag over and into his lap. He unfastened the strings and reached into the bag, pulling out a pre-rolled joint, a lighter, and an ashtray. “A little something to ease your mind?” he said, as Andrew and Josh went wild, cheering for Alex. He placed the ashtray on the coffee table in front of us and handed me the joint and the lighter.

God, I haven’t smoked since college. I haven’t had a real reason to since then. Yeah, I’m stressed now, but not nearly as much as I was back with constant finals and exams and assignments. It was fun. And hey, I’m already decently tipsy. What’s a little extra? Why the hell not?

After contemplating for a moment, I took it from his hand, placed the joint in my mouth, and lit up for the first time in years. That first inhale nearly killed me with how hard I coughed. The guys all laughed at me, and it annoyed me. But after they went back to talking, and my high set in, their voices were drowned out and I completely zoned out of the conversation, only ever coming back when they passed the joint to me. I enjoyed my time with them for the first time since we graduated, as I leaned back into the couch and got drunker with every sip of Corona and my “chick shit” wine, and got higher with every puff.

I don’t remember much else about the night until they were leaving. I wasn’t blacked out or anything, I just was so out of it I can’t remember anything until I came back to reality, in a way. I looked around as they were leaving, and it was dark in the living room, the TV was playing some random music I’d never heard before, and the room was a mess, with empty beer cans and bottles all over the couch and coffee table. I got up to see them out, stumbling over the garbage, and the kitchen was just as dark as the living room. The light from the stove clock illuminated it just enough though to where I could see they left all their snacks and beer. I wasn’t sure whether this was on purpose or not, but I certainly wasn’t gonna complain about it at all. We said our goodbyes, and I shut and locked the door, finally getting some time to myself, without worrying for the first time today. I grabbed a bag of Doritos and a Modelo from the fridge, and went and sat down on the couch. I turned the music off, started playing my own on my speaker from my phone, and played Fortnite on my Xbox for the next few hours.

I was so out of it that 2 hours passed by in an instant, and suddenly, Michelle was home from work. I didn’t notice until she turned on the overhead light in the living room, and shouted my name. It startled me, and sent me in a panic to shut off my game and the music.

I looked at her with wide eyes, heart beating out of my chest. “What!?” I yelled out.

Michelle stood next to the couch, still holding her purse and wore her uniform from work. She hadn’t even taken her shoes off yet. She looked at me with wet eyes, as if she had just gotten done crying. “‘What?’ What do you mean, ‘What?’” she mocked. While her eyes were teary, they still showed an intense fire, showing just how angry she was at me. “I just cleaned up the apartment this morning, and, it’s already filthy again! I mean, look for yourself, Percy!” she yelled out, looking around at the beer cans and bottles, empty chip bags, and random piles of garbage, all left by the guys, then back to me. “And, what the hell is that smell? It’s like something died in here, oh my god, it’s terrible!” she cried out. Oh shit, it must be the weed she’s smelling. I hope she doesn’t realize what it is.

“I dunno,” I stammered out.

“You ‘dunno’. You always ‘dunno’. No, seriously, Percy, what happened while I was gone?”

“I just had some of the guys over, that’s all,” I answered, “they left a few hours ago, I think.. It’s really not that bad, hon,” I say as I looked around at the state of the apartment.

“Did one of them die in here, or something? I mean really, oh my god! How do you not smell that?” she questioned, covering her nose with her shirt, wafting the smell away from her.

I tried to diffuse the situation. “..Smell what?”

She groans in response, “Ugh, whatever,” and then continues, “They left here how long ago? A few hours, you said?” she questioned. She then pointed at me, “So, why didn’t you clean up after they left?”

I’m still a little drunk, and I started to get frustrated with her. I wanted to have a good night with her and it’s already going to shit. I try to hold myself back, but blurt out, “Ugh, it’s not even that bad, Michelle. Just relax.”

“I nearly tripped trying to get in the house because there’s garbage piled up by the front door!” she screamed out, “What the hell do you mean, ‘it’s not that bad’?”

I drunkenly blurted out again, “Michelle, honey, please. Just chill out,” putting my head in my hands. I continued, “You’re really stressing me out right now.. I had a really, really long day today, and, I just wanted to have a good night with you when you got back.”

Michelle laughed in my face after I said that. “Really? What was it that made it a ‘long day’?” She crossed her arms and grimaced at me.

“Well, for starters,” I began, “I had to get an Uber to my parents, so we could plan out Rubin’s birthday over brunch, and–“

“With what money?” she interrupted.

I rolled my eyes. “..With your card,” I mumbled.

She sighed out, “Continue.”

“So.. I had to do that, then I had to stop at that shitty McDonald’s you always complain about since I was starving–“

“With what money, again?”

I rolled my eyes even harder, becoming even more frustrated. “With your card,” I muttered coldly, louder than last time. “Then,” I continued, “the guys came over, and, well, I had to be around them for like, 2 or 3 hours, or something.. You know how much I hate them, baby–“

“So, why’d you invite them over?” She interrupted a third time.

I snapped on her this time. “Why do you keep interrupting me!?” I whined out, losing my temper a bit. She opened her mouth to speak, but closed it again and placed a hand on her hip. I continued, “They basically forced me to have them over! And, they, like, pissed me off the whole time, and kept annoying the shit out of me!”

Michelle was fuming, and I could tell. She let out another chuckle to herself, shaking her head and closing her eyes, and rubbed her temple with one hand, leaving the other on her hip. “Percy,” she started, “I just got done working a double at a grocery store that doesn’t give a shit about me, making $12 an hour, where I got screamed at all day for shit that wasn’t my fault,” she crossed her arms, “my feet have not gotten a break since 6 AM, since I had to be up early to start cleaning up after you. My head is throbbing, my legs, back, and arms are in so much pain. You had brunch with your rich parents, got McDonalds for yourself with my money, and drank with your friends all night. But you were the one who had a long day. Right.” She rolled her eyes as I sat there, speechless, until she caught a glimpse of the wine bottle on the coffee table, stared at it, and her eyes simply drooped as they watered again. Wondering what made her so upset, I looked over along with her, and saw the bottle was almost completely empty, enough to probably fill a shot glass or two. Did I really drink all that? I felt mortified as I looked back to Michelle, and saw she was storming off to our bedroom, where she usually takes off to during our arguments.

I leapt onto my feet and called out to her, trying my best to fix this horrible situation. “I’m sorry for the mess, I really didn’t want them to make such a huge mess, and I was gonna clean it but.. Really, Mika, I-“

She snapped her whole body around to interrupt me, pointing a finger at me and shoving it into my chest, “Don’t fucking call me that, Percy!” she screamed breathlessly, “I don’t give a fuck about whether or not you were gonna clean it. I’m so sick and tired of seeing you sit there on your ass and make it worse for me. It’s fucking disgusting. You’re a grown man and you can’t pick up after yourself? Seriously!?” She threw her arms up in the air in confusion, and turned back around in a hurry to get to the bedroom.

In one last dire effort to calm her down, I grabbed her arm, pulling her back towards me and stopping her from reaching the bedroom, spun her around, and kissed her. It’s been so long since we last kissed, and she tasted amazing. I could feel her trying to wriggle out of my grip, so I just held her tighter and kissed her harder to distract her from her own anger. She continued to push away from me, unsuccessfully, until I felt a hard slap on my right cheek. In shock, I pulled away and let go of her, and stared at her in surprise. She backed away from me creating a few feet of space between us, and she stood and stared at me with a fearful stance.

“What the hell, Percy!?”

I immediately lunged forward and kissed her deeply again before she could finally make it through the door. I grabbed her waist and the back of her head, pushing her into me with both hands. She pushed as hard as she could, nearly getting away once, but my grip on her tightened. I felt my cheeks become flushed as I kissed her and felt her body with my hands. Something came up inside me, making me need this woman more than anything, no matter how mad she was at me. I could feel warmth spreading throughout my whole body as she wriggled in my grip. She smacked me again, but it did nothing. Then another time. I simply grabbed her harder each time she hit me. She yelled between my kisses, “Percy, stop!” as she continued to push me away, but I resisted and silenced her by shoving my tongue in her mouth, deeper with each of her cries. She continued to hit me to shoo me away from her, and even began trying to pull my face away from hers by reaching her arm up and tugging at my hair and pushing at my face. I only responded by grabbing her arms and bringing them back down as she did so. By this point I was practically panting, as with each moment and each hit and tug and pull, I craved her and her body more and more. I needed to feel her entire body and I wanted her to feel mine.

I finally pulled away from her to gain some breath. My heart was pounding out of my chest, and my whole body felt so weak and tingly around her, but my grip on her stayed the same. As I pulled my mouth away from hers, I breathed in deeply and opened my eyes to look at her face. Her eyes were wide with a helpless look, an adorable look that made my knees wobble as I saw it. I couldn’t help but lean back in to kiss her again, and as I closed my eyes, I felt a large object make impact with my jaw and ear, physically knocking my face away from hers, and my whole body stumbled to the side following my head. I won’t lie, it sent me reeling, and I grabbed my jaw and caressed it to ease the pain. I looked up at Michelle, who backed away from me again, holding her purse out with her arm fully extended. I could see her slightly tremble, and she said nothing before she made her way in the bedroom, slammed the door.

I smirked a bit after collecting myself, finding her anger so adorable. I followed after her, and turned the doorknob, but it wouldn’t budge. She must’ve locked it. I tried to force it open again, using my body to try and make the door move a little, but still nothing. Still fiddling with the doorknob, I begged and pleaded for Michelle to come back out and talk to me, but she ignored me. I grew desperate and began banging on the door, trying to get it open. I needed to feel her body again, to touch her, and kiss, and taste her again.

“Michelle, please.. I just wanna talk, please..”

“We can talk when you learn how to clean up your shit,” she finally called out through the door. Just the sound of her voice made me melt.

“Baby, I.. I just really wanted to have a nice night,” I whined out, sliding my hands down the door, “why do you always have to go and ruin it for us..? Why can’t you just take care of it tomorrow, or something?”

“Oh, my god, I have work tomorrow, too! 7 to 5, plus I have to run errands tomorrow after! I don’t have the time to be your goddamn maid, Percy! I’m fucking done with it! Don’t think I’m doing shit with you until you learn how to clean up around the house.”

Again with the ‘having no time’. “I had a busy day too, hon, like I said,” I softly pleaded to her, “And I’m busy all day tomorrow, too.. I have to worry about my career taking off soon, and, I.. I have to go back to my parents again tomorrow! I just- I just don’t have the time either, I-“

I stopped mid sentence, quieting down to listen to the rustles and thumps coming from inside the room. I put my ear up to the door, listening carefully, before the door moved suddenly and I nearly fell over. I saw Michelle standing there, holding a ball of laundry, and she was wearing only a pair of pajama pants and a black bra. She let her hair down, just the way I liked it, and she had that look on her face again, with a tear streaming down her face. She coldly said as her brows furrowed, “Then you know what? If you have to go over again tomorrow, why don’t you get a head start, and get the fuck out of here.” She shoved the clothes at me, and I nearly dropped them since I was so focused on her, and her beautiful body. It had been so, so long since I’d seen her like this, and god, that face she was making drove me crazy. My face felt hot and my whole body was all wobbly again.

All I could mutter was, “Look, Michelle, I.. I’m sorry.. for acting how I did, just now. Let’s just.. can we, uh.. restart, hon?”

She looked to the side, crossing her arms over her chest and rubbing her biceps up and down. “Just.. Just go, please. I can’t do this right now.”

“No, baby, I.. I really just, I wanna make this up to you,” I said gently. I tossed my clothes onto the floor, and placed one hand on her waist and wiped her tears with the other. As I touched her, she slightly backed away from me, her body trembling again. I leaned in to kiss her, caressing her cheek as I did, and held her against me by the waist with the other hand. She resisted for just a moment, but finally gave in and began kissing me back.

My face felt hot again as we stumbled into the room, and I lead her to the bed, pushing her onto it and leaning over her as we made out. I made my way down from her jaw to her neck, then down to her chest where I left 2 hickeys. I joked with her, “I know you have work tomorrow, so, I left them there instead, heh.” She had no reaction.

I massaged my hands over her entire body, and my lips followed. I undressed myself, helped her take off her bra and pants, and kissed her one final time before pushing her onto her back, spreading her legs, and getting on top of her, positioning myself so I could see all the helpless faces she always made.

She looked a bit hesitant, almost disinterested, like she was spaced out. I gained her attention, and reassured her, “Just enjoy it, alright?”

After we finished, I fell over onto my back and breathed heavily. Michelle stayed perfectly still, before turning onto her side, getting cozy under the covers, and curling up into a ball, staying silent. Neither of us said anything for a good while. I think she might’ve fell asleep, so now, it’s just me and my thoughts until she wakes up. My mind wandered and recollected our argument beforehand. I looked to the clock, and it was already 10:30, an hour and a half since she’d gotten home. I thought about how angry she was when she walked through the door, and how upset she was while we were still talking. God, her face when she saw the wine. I definitely fucked up with that one. Well, at least the night wasn’t totally ruined, after all of that. I remembered how she’d told me to “get a head start” on my day tomorrow, and told me to go to my parents. I know she meant it as an insult, but.. it didn’t sound like a horrible idea. I have to be there a bit early tomorrow, plus I should dedicate most of my day to my league, shouldn’t I? Thank you, Michelle, for the idea.

I got out of bed and dressed myself again. I gathered all the clothes that laid outside the bedroom door, and loosely shoved them into an old backpack, before finally hearing my Mika’s voice again.

She called out, “What are you doing?”

“Oh, I uh, was thinking about what you said earlier, about me getting a head start on my day tomorrow, and, uh, I thought it was a good idea. So, I’ll be at my parents house for the night.”

She didn’t respond.

“I’ll be home before you get home tomorrow, don’t worry.”

Still no response.

I finished packing up all my things and got my shoes on.

“Is it alright if I take your car, hon?” I asked.

The only response I got was her adjusting the blanket a bit. Must be half asleep. I assume she wouldn’t need it that bad, so I reached into her purse and took her keys.

Before I left, I quietly approached Michelle, gently moved the hair from her face, and planted a kiss on her temple, before whispering to her, “I love you, Mika.” I turned back around, grabbed my stuff, turned off the light, and shut the door. I finally left the apartment, and headed over to my parents house.

[nijigay]

hiiii :3 I noticed ur one (of a few) ppl who ships boniji on tumblr, and I wanna know if you know any accounts/artists who ships them so I could follow them to satiate my boniji fixation >.< Also, some bocchi x nijika questions I wanna personally ask: what songs do you recommend that reminds you of them? Also, what are some boniji fanfics you recommend/like? I probably already read most of their fics but I wanna know what others like. Lastly, ur personal boniji headcanons if you don't mind sharing... 👉👈

I only ask blogs rarely cuz I'm shy so no need to answer immediately...

I'm just brainrotting over boniji so much! im so normal about them (◔‿◔)

AWAWAWA i love boniji like so much like too much like its become my main personality trait!

but youre right!!! it feels like boniji fans are mostly japan natives and there dont seem to be many english speaking boniji fans! ohhh i wish there was more of a following! imagine a boniji zine in the west! i would pay money to get involved with that

im kind of embarrassed about shoving my ships in ppls faces all the time and this might get long and its just me like rambling about my OTP so like .. gona put it under a read more lol. seriously this post is like almost 2k words long thats longer than my average fanfic chapter

i hate to be a shill but im going to be a shill for my fic recommendations:

ive been working on a lowkey corny boniji hanahaki fic on AO3 and some other oneshots, so maybe you would be willing to check my own stuff out?? (if u want .-. im really amateur with this stuff despite being an art student lol) its been on hiatus for like half a year but im just adhd af and keep restarting. im still working on it frequently tho and im secretly hoping to start updating on a consistent basis soon. but i also liked fics like "Midnight and Daydreams" and "Bubblegum Detergent" and "A Sellout Night" and "Just Enough to be Enough" and "A Kiss is Not A Cure". MANNN i remember that last one fucked me up bad when it was posted. it was only the second ever dedicated boniji fic and like I LOVE angst but with how small the sample size of fics was at the time it was like AUFHAUIJKADGF. all those fics are super super good though! i also love the third one, i love the trans bocchi HC personally

umm as far songs songs tho, i guess the ones i associate with boniji most are:

"veil" by keina suda, i remember drafting some animatic for an angsty AU of Hitori living on post-Kessoku

"STEP&CLAP" by yoshino aoyama (aka yoppi aka bocchis VA <3), i think yoppi making the song speaks for itself but its a rly cute song and i love thinking of Hitori and Nijika like tap dancing to it?? check out the rest of yoppi's debut album too!! her voice is so pretty and i was so happy finding out that there are 11 songs with her voice, instead of the 1 from the anime

idk why but i also think of them a lot when listening to PMMM's ost by yuki kaijuri, like "desiderium" and "not yet" and "mada dame yo"? these r kinda a stretch though but idk!!

i also like compiling music that reminds me of them into spotify playlists, if youd like some inspiration for your own! this one and also this angstier one

i have a lot of boniji headcanons but i feel like its hard for me to like list them all in one spot because they usually come to me with context during relevant conversations?? but ill list whatever i can think of!:

this ones not necessarily boniji but i was thinking about it like an hour ago, but i really like the idea of Seika being a huge boniji supporter. like in the source material she already finds Bocchi really cute, so I get the impression she would really like to be an older sister figure for Bocchi (and probably gets jealous of Kikuri for holding that spot in Bocchi's life lol), and so Nijika being a potential love interest for Bocchi would make Seika double down hard on supporting boniji. she'd probably be the one who brings Bocchi up to Nijika more than Nijika would bring her up to Seika?? i also like to imagine that for Seika she has a similar complex to Yoyoko. but instead of "Bocchi is stealing my spot as Hiroi's younger sister figure," it would be "Kikuri is stealing my spot as Bocchi's older sister figure" LOL . if that makes any sense at all

this ones actually taken from a japanese twitter user, but they moved on from boniji after the anime ended. but they had some headcanons that REALLY stuck with me. my favorite was the idea that Bocchi and Nijika both have inferiority complexes with one another. iirc their (translated) words were along the lines of "Bocchi thinks of Nijika as a pure, comforting light in her life, one that could be muddied if Bocchi got involved with her. On the other hand, Nijika thinks of Bocchi as a reliable hero who outshines an ordinary girl like her." i just REALLY like it. it also reminds me of this conversation that Yoppi and Suzushiro had on the BTR podcast, about Bocchi and Nijika's first meeting! like nijika literally brought light into Bocchi's life awdsfsgdhgfjh

actually that same user above also made a tweet that is the reason why i associate Keina Suda's "veil" with boniji! they made a tweet about an AU idea, where, in the event that Nijika would ever pass away, Seika would give Bocchi her ribbon, which Hitori would wear from that point onwards as she continues to play music to honor Nijika's memory. they also suggested that in the opposite event of Hitori passing away, Nijika would possibly do something very rash out of despair but thats dark hahaha!!!!

i kinda think this goes without saying and i think its actually a fairly common HC for BTR characters in general, but I can definitely see Bocchi being trans

I like to imagine that shortly after Volume 2, Bocchi and Nijika would probably have another conversation

eventually, i'm sure if Bocchi and Nijika pursued a relationship that they'd eventually move in together (or like into the same room? if Kessoku Band had a sharehouse?), and since both Bocchi and Nijika tend to be minimalistic with their room decor, their shared room would again become filled with a ton of Ryo's clothes and items and instruments, like how Nijika's room at Seika's apartment is

i think they'd both end up being really touchy with each other, especially when nervous? Bocchi kind of already does this when she's in new places (eg bringing Kita to Shimokitazawa, or going to FOLT for the first time and being dragged by Nijika), but I think it would grow to them finding comfort with each other?

idk if this is necessarily a HC but i really like how Bocchi and Nijika emotionally support each other, even in source. Nijika is shown to have a really good read on Bocchi (to the point of Bocchi worrying that Nijika is actually a psychic), knowing Bocchi's common thought processes, and picking up from Bocchi's mother during her first visit to Kanazawa that karaage chicken can bring Bocchi out of her anxiety attacks, and seems to be the only character who actually comments on Bocchi's growth as an individual and actively tries to facilitate it; but she also doesn't lovebomb Bocchi with praise, striking what seems to be a good balance for pushing Bocchi but also being a reliable confidant for her too.

one of my favorite details from the anime that i really feel doesnt get talked about as often as it should is when Nijika finally notices that Bocchi is guitarhero! she definitely wasn't the first to notice (Seika noticed first, but it seemed like Seika only knew about guitarhero via Nijika. When she notices that Bocchi's playing sounds familiar, her thought process immediately goes towards wondering why Nijika isn't noticing, and then she just tells them to get back to work) but she was the first one that Bocchi admits it too. but my favorite part is how Bocchi says that she wanted to change and grow as a person before telling them the truth, and she says that she especially wanted to grow before Nijika in particular found out! its just really cute, i love how Bocchi was worried about disappointing Nijika. and i like how, after some growth, Bocchi's dream turns from "becoming popular" to "making Kessoku Band the best band it can be" which is like almost basically the same as Nijika's dream! and so it's really nice when Bocchi doubles down on that goal by not remotely entertaining the idea of leaving Kessoku Band, even when goaded by promises of popularity.

last headcanon! because i ran out of thoughts and just came up with this on the spot. but i also like the idea that as the years go on, Bocchi and Nijika in particular may kind of become more similar in personality. i mean, they'd definitely still be distinctly them, but i like to think that Bocchi would eventually start picking up more optimistic habits and stop grimacing all the time, while Nijika would eventually become a little more lax and not reflexively try to dismiss her own negative feelings via looking at the silver lining. i thought of that when Nijika kinda dismisses her family dynamics with her mother's passing and her father's neglect after Kessoku's first real performance, as well as Nijika seeming to admit after inhaling Bocchi Dust(?) during her and Kita's Kanazawa visit that some of her optimism is performative

ok another one Nijika seems to have her art skills commented on sometimes so i like to imagine she has doodles of Bocchi in her sketchbook (alongside everyone else but mostly Bocchi). like think of like Miles Morales drawing a ton of Gwen Stacy like that kinda deal but with Nijika drawing Bocchi. and like Bocchi finds the sketchbook and Nijika freaks out and Bocchi actually doesnt look bc she doesnt want to do something wrong. but then Ryo or Kita take it and look instead and then show Bocchi and Bocchi melts into a flustered puddle

wowwow this got long! sorry! i really mean it when im like OBSESSED with these two like i think ive thought about them on a daily basis ever since the episode aired where Nijika bought Bocchi a cola. isnt that cute, too!? she picked up on Bocchi's favorite soda so quickly! and her buying a box of energy drinks for Bocchi despite not understanding why at all! girlfriend behavior

i really really want to make more boniji content, i'd like to be more active in posting my fics and drabbles and drawings, someday soon. right now most of my boniji content is just illegible sketches in my sketchbook lol

also thank u so much for like sending this ask im like BEGGING internally all the time to be given the chance to talk about them! i dont think theyre like a rarepair or anything, especially with them seeming to be like the second most popular BTR ship in japan, but i do think that not many people talk to them in the english side of the fandom! theyre super super cute and have really good chemistry.

this entire post is probably like a total carwreck i hope its even readable

ill also use this post as an excuse to post my own HCs for a Kessoku Band's relations chart. it's a bonus for reading this far. i'm sorry for draining 22 HP from you with this brain dump

[anachronistic-falsehood]

hiiii whiskeyy, im that one person who asked here if i could draw the nico sides almost a year ago and i finally drew 3 of them!!! i hope you dont mind that i also added a few details that weren't in your descriptions of them

aurelio's shirt was looking a little plain so i gave him this ruffly pattern that i saw on a bunch of porcelain dolls and made his jacket white and pink bc thtas a color ppl associate with love

muse i had no idea what to make his outfit so i made him wear roleslaying with roman but rainbow bc gay and i tried to made the end of the staff look like a fountain pen but idk if it worked

and for ricardo i just gave him some pens in his pocket bc he seems to like making charts and stuff so i figured he would have some pens on him (and proceeds to use a random marker anyways)

i also wanted to ask if you could give more description of vigilance cuz i was having some problems with his shirt and jacket, i have no idea what patches to put on the jacket. i was thinking of making it sleeveless so he could wear a t shirt like aurelio but idk if thats what you wanted

anyways i love your fics and feel free to tell me if there's anything you would change 😃

OH MY GOODNESSSSS HELLO HI!!!! OH MY GOD THEY LOOK AMAZING..... HOLY SHIT!!!! ohhh this is incredible!!! oh they are so perfect!!!!!!! literally was gushing about these designs out loud in my kitchen as soon as i saw them holy shit!!!!!! i love the lil details on aurelio and ricardo!! aurelio's ruffle patterns r so cute and suit him so well and i love ricardo's pocket full of pens <3 AND AAAAAA MUSE!!! MUSE IS PERFECT HE IS SO SO PERFECT HE IS EVERYTHING!!! THE CAPE!!! THE FOUNTAIN PEN STAFF!!!! THAT'S LITERALLY HIM!!!!!!! these designs are canon now i have decided this is exactly how they look in flores facets. AAAAA I LOVE THEM ALL IM NEVER GONNA GET OVER UR DESIGN FOR MUSE HE LOOKS SO MAGICAL!!!!!!!!

ooooo i have 2 go back and remember what vigilance looks like bc it's been a while since i've written these guys!!! hmmm ik i described him in excepting paranoia ch 3 but ur givin me a chance 2 describe him more and i am gonna take it!! he's definitely got one of the anarchy symbol for sure. and one of the progress flag as well!!! he's definitely got a variety of them, ones that say stuff like "eat the rich" "fuck the system" u know like a lot of diy punk patches!!! honestly now that i'm thinkin abt his design, i'm wondering if i should retcon the jacket to be denim instead of leather, bc denim is way easier to put patches on than leather as far as i'm aware. it could be a vest instead!!!! i think i'll definitely change it to denim tho i like denim jackets <3 whether u wanna make it with sleeves or not is up 2 u!!! for the sake of canonicity i'll say sometimes he wears a jacket and sometimes he wears a vest. draw whichever u want <3 i think he wears a lot of graphic tees. he's all against corporations but most of his tshirts are disney themed bc he's still part of nico and fuck it man he enjoys disney musicals!!!! he's still a nerd like the rest of them <3

this has reminded me i should write more flores facets actually. im gonna write a new one and dedicate it 2 u specifically for this wonderful art oh my god im going insane over this

[rarepairnation]

hiiii denethor anon here!! wow you’re really IN IT now (denethorposting). not to add more fuel to your anger but last week i saw someone say they hated denethor. and i just realised god they don’t get him even on tumblr do they. since then i’ve been silently fuming in rage. anyway… i am very Very Intrigued by both your faramir-goes-to-rivendell-au and denethor-thorongil relationship (if you ever want to write another 800 words about this, i am here for it 👀) and this line “each of them sharpens himself upon the whetstone of the other…” fuck. fucking insane actually.

unfortunately i won’t be replying for several days (i’ve had to keep my phone in another room to keep myself from getting distracted) . my exams have started AND i’m going through some shit irl :( it’s alright tho i’ll have more Faramir and Denethor Hours soon <- chanting this constantly haha. but i am with you when denethorposting IN SPIRIT okay. oh and can we please please please have denethor december? 🙏 bye will be here soon after my exams (that will be after the 23rd march i’m afraid)

hiii denethor anon <333 i am SO sorry this is so late truly attempting to figure out how to write AND see my friends AND do things like clean my apartment and go to the grocery store while working The Job...it has eaten my life. and this week my regular coffee shop switched their hours bc i live in my old college town and they are on spring break and it has sent me directly to hell. the death of My Routine…i have coped by INCESSANTLY denethorposting on tumblr dot com. i am somehow EVEN MORE in it than i was when you sent this ask. i hope you enjoy me being truly crazyinsane whenever you get a chance to look at all those posts lol. would love 2 hear your thoughts on them. but ANYWAY as always it is so lovely to see you, i'm sorry things have been tough but truly with my whole heart i bestow upon you the strength of denethor's sixty-year psychic war (with none of the associated madness) to make it through. looking at the date i hope you are free now.

here is the mandated readmore because i have never met brevity in my whole life. u said write another 800 words and i took that as a challenge um this post is like 2000 words. well...back on my bullshit

i mean this with all the love and joy in my heart but i laughed so much. no my dear friend they do not get him on tumblr. they have not gotten him on tumblr from the beginning. if you have been spared the incessant tomato jokes i truly…[crying] I Wish I Were You So Bad. this guy doesnt even know about the tumblr denethor slander (POSITIVE) (YEARNING). its the trenches out here for real. i just live in my little bubble with me and you and like four other mutuals/Denethor Understanders and that is it.

speaking of denethor and the rivendell au. i miss the days when i was working on the faramir-in-gondor scenes. emotionally it felt like dying but i kind of knew what was going on. now i am in rivendell taking and failing this history of middle earth exam. and i am so very….the next time we see denethor for real is in return of the king. now girl…how will i survive another 80k words. i miss my boy my dear darling my tortured victim of the narrative. and according to the paragraph i just wrote faramir does too but is Refusing to admit it to himself<3

im also RIDICULOUSLY torn on how i want to resolve his arc. now just between you and me. and anyone who bothers to click that read more. I DONT WANT TO KILL HIM I WANT HIM TO LIVE. GOD I WANT HIM TO LIVE. I WILL WRITE YOU A THOUSAND HAPPY ENDINGS. except its not a happy ending its a you are not allowed to die you are forced to contend with your choices you must keep living ending. because he will always be tragic no matter what. but its ALSO a you can rest now you can be at peace son of gondor you have won your war. all you sacrificed has been worth it. you have given your all when that's what duty asked you for and it has been enough. and that makes my poor heart weep.

like on one hand the idea of resolving his storyline with faramir.......the opportunity for some kind of reconciliation, some kind of understanding between them...god. delicious. i know in my heart that faramir comes home and IS the lord that denethor once dreamed of being. not playing at it...he is high and lordly and gentle and the world bends around his will and he knows exactly what to bow to and when to stand his ground and his powers are honed to a keen edge that he uses with the utmost care and. AUGH. he walks into the citadel the IMAGE of his father. it makes me feel FERAL. and how would denethor react to that. man.

BUT ON THE OTHER HAND HOW DO I END THE STORY. like. LOL. do u know what i mean. likelihood of me being able to just have a triumphant coronation and tie it all up with a bow is soooo small. the narrative contortions i would have to go through. to have denethor accept that and still be in character. Girl....no thank u <3 so we havent worked THAT out yet. like how much of the madness and despair do i want to put into the narrative. We Shall See. IM not politically savvy enough to get real into the weeds with it all so im kind of rotating just. a beautiful set of reunions with the fellowship. eowyn and faramir get engaged. boromir and faramir see all their dreams of a gondor restored come true. we skate over the political minefield and deeply navigate the beginnings of denethor and faramir's relationship in this new world. and among it all, within it all, is hope, and a new dawn. and curtain.

i got distracted but re: we are in rivendell. it IS kind of fun to think about the themes and narratives. i am pushing my Let Faramir (And Denethor) Be Numenorean + Let Numenoreans Be Weird agendas so so sooo hard and i am having the time of my life with that specifically. birds follow him around and pick up the tunes he sings. he hears the voices of the people he loves in his head. he falls into a river and after having a breakdown about it promptly decides that The River Is Testing Him And He Has Passed. he gets to rivendell and INSTANTLY knows that there is someone Very Like Him Here (its elrond. the elrond-elros-faramir connection has me FROTHING at the mouth. faramir looks at elrond and sees his father and sees every statue of elros in minas tirith and Knows that this here is the son of earendil, gil-estel, his brightest north star. elrond looks at faramir and sees his brother, his dear dead doomed brother, and every numenorean descended from him and all their sins and all their glories and yet, kind as summer, sees beauty and knowledge and a strange quiet man who carries all the weight of his country on his shoulders and yet knows him, knows the legends; perhaps the blood of numenor is not yet spent in the south)

i just think that Every Elf that meets faramir along the way is like woah...hold up. there's something up with THIS guy! men ARENT supposed to do that! not anymore anyway! galadriel is Lowkey Threatened by him. and isnt that beautiful. woman who could be queen of the earth sees god's special chosen boy and goes hang on a minute. Fuck. i think they work out their shit by the time the company leaves lothlorien but like...just thinking about how faramir lowkey blamed her for boromir's death in rotk! idk how their dynamic is exaclty gonna manifest but there's definitely some sort of similar mindreader2mindreader tension!

AND. um the idea of faramir travelling with the fellowship discovering that maybe...well. he has never wanted to be a warrior but he has been honed into a blade anyway. by his father and by necessity. and perhaps for the first time in his life...outside of gondor he does not need to be all that. he can be mithrandir's pupil without censure he can be scholarly and witty and cunning - he is all these things, in gondor. but there he has to be them, and now he can discover that yes, this is what he wants to be. and he has never let his father and the expectations of his position STOP him but there is always a weight, there is always the knowledge that your actions are disapproved of, and being away from that for a while is i just think. really good for him. see above re: he comes home the image of his father in a gentler time. keep honking im sitting in my car crying about denethor ii twenty sixth steward of gondor.jpg (<- my greatest creation PLEASE click the link lol)

ALSO IM THRILLED YOU LIKED THAT WHETSTONE LINE LOL i kind of blacked out when i typed it on the page. i think truly the crazy thing about denethor and faramir is that they SHOULD understand each other. they know so much about each other and yet are so incompetent at actually putting it to any good use towards, you know, improving their relationship. faramir is incredibly emotionally intelligent AND can read minds AND has taken so many of what he probably views as denethor's worst traits and turned them to gentler uses. (im talking about his powers but im ALSO talking about that thing he does when he encounters frodo and sam where he plays woe is me my brother is dead and i miss him sooo much to get on their good sides. yes of course he misses boromir more than anything else in the world. no he is not above using it to his advantage. and we see the SAME THING when gandalf and pippin come to minas tirith. hey isn't it crazy that both of them use boromir as a. manipulation chip. even after he's dead. hey thats kind of fucked up actually!) and denethor is…well denethor is denethor. ok im mostly messing around and thought that sentence was funny. i think he Knows most everything that goes on in faramir's head and yet Wilfully Chooses to interpret it in the worst ways because its just soo....very I Thought I Raised You Better Than That/I Honed You To Be My Blade Stop Defying Me. and despite all that the Problem is that they understand each other right up until they don't. they know how THEY feel about each other (incredible love that they can only express in the worst ways/think they're expressing only to be spurned by the other) but cannot POSSIBLY imagine that the other feels the same way.

ive gone on for SO SO LONG ALREADY LOL but. what do i have to say about denethor and thorongil. not enough and too much all at once. they're so toxic and awful for each other they're MADE for each other they're beautiful narrative parallels they're homoerotic besties they're bitter rivals they're pawns in a proxy war they're locked at all times in a psychic psychosexual situationship. um the enemy of my enemy is kissing me with tongue. idk i have more symbolism and actual analysis especially of the denethor-ecthelion-thorongil Issue. but we are just getting into it. so i will start with the situations bc i have two angles for this. on one hand i do think it is very fun if they constantly homoerotically circle each other for years and years and never do a THING about it. like...this is a stitching up wounds wiping blood off each others faces battle couple/situationship situation that THEN turns into a ridiculously high functioning political rival partnership bent together over books long into the night catching each others eye in council meetings using their very real disdain for each other for Manipulation Purposes and getting uh. SO hot over it. like.....Do You Know What I Mean. just. truly unresolved sexual tension THROUGH THE ROOF. it DELIGHTS me. they are always putting themselves in situations. and then NOT making out about it. AND THEY CAN READ EACH OTHERS MINDS!! THE WHOLE TIME!! SO THEY KNOW EXACTLY HOW MUCH THEY WANT EACH OTHER AND STILL ARENT DOING ANYTHING ABOUT IT!!! like thats just really good. but on the other hand.......the idea of just an absolutely terrible beautiful toxic rivals with benefits codependent situationship. i hate you so much and you know what we DO need to make out about it. every time they fuck it is a power play and they are having SO much fun with it. they will both start arguments with each other (AND IN PUBLIC TOO) just so they can fight and make up. the mind reading...Oh You Know What I Mean. taylor swift voice we had this big white city all to ourselves we blocked the noise with the sound of i need you and for the first time i had something to lose! logically thorongil is not yet in his grubby ranger era but the idea of him being dirt smeared all the time and hanging out with prim proper polished denethor. in the fic (which does exist and DOES follow the second model) theres a scene where hes just chilling with his head in denethor's lap and denethor is actually rather delighted and devoting ALL of his copious braincells to pretending not to be. Man. well never say im not a slut for contrast. and now the rest of what i could say is simply straight up redacted for indecency so it is time for this post to be over. the last thing i have to say is that it absolutely ruins denethor's life forever when thorongil up and leaves. sometimes a situationship....anyway. MUCH LOVE TO YOU AS ALWAYS yes we will have denethor december i already have an url saved.

[anawrites3]

Ana love, idk if u keep up with comics but in the new Nightwing run we might be getting a sidekick for nightwing and idk how I feel about it btw :(

Im torn bc like, I have ALWAYS wanted Damian Wayne to be his “Robin” and for them to do a Robin Returns arc but like Robin returns to Dick, not not Batman. Like Robin finally returns to Dick Grayson but in the form of his own sidekick, Damian Wayne. It’s wishful thinking, I know, bc like, no one can have a Robin unless they’re Batman. But idk, the one run where Dick was Batman and Damian was his Robin, his almost son. It holds soooo much space in my heart and I want DC writers to return them to their fatherly-son roots.

On the other hand, I really think it goes against Dick’s character to take an orphan boy (as the new chapters have depicted a boy who had seen his dad murder by (possibly) Heartless) and do the same thing Bruce did to him (aka child soldier) when he’s seen the path himself and his friends have gone down due to following in their parental figure’s footsteps.

Like, I can see Dick picking up a sidekick that has already been brought into the vigilante world by someone else (YK LIKE DAMIAN WAYNE) bc he would take it as his responsibility to look after them and make sure they’re still somewhat protected and still have their childhood and innocence even tho they’re been forced into this line of work.

But I really really really can’t see THE Dick Grayson introduce an innocent kid into the hero life.

He’s fr recognised as the hero Batman should have been. So I think it goes against his character to follow in Bruce’s footsteps like this…

Fr when I catch you Tom Taylor - when I catch you 🤨

It's the first time I'm hearing about it actually but I feel you so much, anon!

I really want Damian to be Dick's Robin. I want him to become Nightwing in the future. Dick had a greater impact on Damian - because Bruce wasn't there but also because Bruce is kinda shit at dealing with people, while Dick is... well, Dick haha And yeah, Robin was always Batman's partner but maybe it should change now (soon?)

And I too don't think Dick would ever get the child he adopts into the vigiliante business. Or any child to be honest. He wouldn't want it - he knows firsthand how it is to be the child soldier, all the danger that comes out of it and I know that he would do everything in his might to stop the kiddo from following in his path. Unless the writers do something smart for once and go with the whole "I can't stop him so at least I'll keep an eye on him and protect him while he punches bad people" - the same way it was with Bruce and Dick at first but still... I don't really like it. It could be fun if Dick just adopted the kid without all that sidekick crap and writers would focus on more family shenanigans, maybe with Damian being the jealous little brother/son - but I bet DC would think it's too boring 🙄

And yeah, you're totally right about Dick taking under his wings a kid who already is a vigilante and how he would never bring a new kiddo into the vigilante world. It would go against his character so much but... not like writers really care about that stuff anymore.

I think there would be a way to write that story pretty well and not fuck up Dick's character entirely though the sheer idea puts a sour taste in my mouth. But if you're saying it's going to be Tom Taylor's run... well, I don't have a lot of hope 😫

We just have to wait and see, I guess 😔 And hope for the best