#love them sooo much though i love my cousins and one is about to leave for cambridge which is crazy

[breathingsong]

new lows

[grazi-your-rockette-queen]

This is a scenario I like to play in my head lol: you meet a dorky Kirk and hit it off immediately. He acts cute and shy which draws you in. One way or another you end up in his room where he’s pretty much a freak in the sheets kinda guy💀but still very sweet afterwards

omg sooo i love this sm. i have to admit i’m a little bit of a perfectionist and i really hope this is close to what you imagine but omg i feel u. i literally love himmm. also i kinda suck at beginnings so bear w me 🙏 (i also accidentally deleted the first half when i was almost finished and had to rewrite the whole beginning 🥰)

this is gonna be long so prepare urself babes

sweet but psycho- kirk hammett

you were at a get together that your cousin had dragged you to, something relating to this band that he was a roadie for. he had decided you needed to get out more, and that it was a good opportunity for you to socialize. it wasn’t necessarily your scene, denim and patches galore, but you fit in alright. it wasn’t too much fun for you though, there were drinks and a few guys attempting to make conversation, but none were interesting or attractive enough to capture your attention. you decided to head into the living room of whoever’s house it was, and sit yourself down on one of the two couches, beer in hand. you took a swig from the bottle before noticing the curly haired, leather jacket wearing metalhead sitting on the other couch. he must’ve noticed you, as he was staring shyly through big brown eyes shielded partially by bangs. he matched the vibe of the other people in the house, only he stood out for some reason. he wasn’t actively getting drunk and acting mad, instead he was sitting quietly with a beer and a magazine of some sort. he smiled at you subtly, and you returned the smile with a little,

“hi.” and it was history from then on, once you noticed the magazine he had was not any regular magazine, but one you’d never seen or heard of before, having to do with some sort of horror element. before you knew it, you’d moved to sit next to him and the two of you began talking about just what got you into this get together. his individuality intrigued you, though he partially resembled many other people at the event, he didn’t act like any of them in the slightest. he was calm, quiet. it was not a thing you’d experienced with anyone your cousin had introduced you to in this specific music scene, but you enjoyed talking to him.

“oh, i can’t believe i forgot to ask your name?” you brought your hand up to your forehead in slight disbelief, you’d been so easily distracted by the boy’s actions that you hadn’t thought about his name at all. 

“i’m kirk, and you?”

“kirk. my name is y/n.” your lips curving into a smile. he too was smiling, you noticed his teeth were certainly crooked, but as a first, you almost found it cute. you were mesmerized by everything you perceived kirk as, the way he seemed to prefer his own quiet company over other people’s attention, the way he was so incredibly easy to talk to. and he was very sweet.

it got to be very late, and you’d been talking for hours before you realized it was past midnight and you should be getting home. it occurred to you’d driven your cousin in your car, and you hadn’t seen him in a while. you let kirk know that you had to leave before blowing him a little kiss, which he blushed at. you waved to him and stood up, asking around for your cousin, and a small crowd of people said that he’d left with someone and they were supposed to tell you. you shrugged and walked towards the door, but you stopped in your tracks, remembering that you had wanted to give kirk your phone number. you searched for a piece of paper or anything you could write on, coincidentally bumping into kirk in the kitchen while he was looking for another drink. he smiled and you both laughed a little, and you told him you’d wanted to give him your number. his eyes lighted up and his smile grew wider, he contained his excitement and just said,

“ok!” in a soft voice. as the both of you looked for a pen and paper, you asked what his plans were for the rest of the night.

“uh, i’m not really sure. i’m here with the rest of the band, we might get back to the studio, we might go home, god knows, really. all i know is i’m tired.” he chuckled at the last bit, rubbing his eyes.

“i could give you a ride home, if you want.” you offered in a quiet voice, it being the first thing you thought of. he looked back at you,

“yeah, sure, i’d like that.” he agreed.

“i probably have sticky notes in my car or something. just remind me about it.” he nodded and followed close behind you out the front door of the house, making your way through a mixture of drunken party goers. by the time you were on the front porch, you looked back to make sure he was still behind you. you owe him to your car and you both got in, backing out of the crowded front lawn. you drove him to the house he lived in with the rest of the band, and parked in the driveway. you remembered to look for sticky notes in your car, while you were frantically doing so, kirk suddenly grabbed your hand. you looked up at him,

“y/n… would you, um, come in with me?” he asked with a red hot face, looking into your eyes. you hesitantly but happily agreed. he opened the car door for you, and walked you inside the house.

“you live here with all your band? is it fun?”

“most of the time it’s not bad. it’s just us, y’know.” he held your hand as the two of you walked upstairs, the tension temporarily going unacknowledged, until you got to his bedroom. the two of you stopped talking, only becoming lost in each others eyes as your bodies slowly inched closer to one another. he held you by the hips, and with your lips being mere centimeters apart, he whispered,

“can i kiss you?” you nodded almost unnoticeably before colliding your lips with his in a swift, soft kiss that would evolve to be heated and intense. it was seconds before he had his jacket and shirt off, joining your own on the floor by his bed. he laid you down and met you on his bed, reconnecting your mouths again, and he started to move his hands down your half dressed body, starting at moving up your torso, to your chest.

“can i take this off?” he asked, between kisses and heavy breaths. you nodded once again and lifted yourself up off the bed enough for him to reach behind your back and unclasp your bra. you helped him remove it from your arms, letting it fall off the side of the bed. he let away from the kiss to admire the view of the top half of your body underneath him, eyes darkened with lust, breathing slow and loud as he cupped one of your tits with his hand, running his thumb over your nipple. you gasped at the movement, watching him. he continued kissing you again, and began moving down to your neck and collarbone, starting to suck and bite, leaving dark spots there. you ran a hand through his soft hair, moaning softly. he kissed a line from your neck to the waistline of your bottoms, and only looked up at you for approval to take off your shorts, which you granted. he hooked his fingers on your shorts and pulled them down with your panties, leaving him facing your dampening pussy. he was nearly drooling at the sight, not bothering to resist running a finger through your folds to check just how wet you were. as he did so, you gasped again, and felt the bulge in his jeans twitch against your leg. he drew the finger up to his mouth to taste your arousal, eagerly licking it clean before grabbing onto your legs, spreading them apart and licking a thick stripe up your slick cunt, causing you to let out a loud sigh. he continued eating your pussy messily, licking and sucking for his life. he alternated from sticking his tongue in and out of your hole and sucking on your clit. you kept both your hands tangled in his hair, mewling and starting to occasionally buck your hips to his face, and he started slowly grinding up against the mattress.

“kirk! i’m going to-”

“come on my tongue baby, you got it.” and you did, with a loud moan, eyes rolling to the back of your head. he was quick to lap up all of your cum from between your thighs as you panted. you grabbed onto his hair, pulling it so that he would look up at you, he moaned at the pressure, obeying the action and looking up at you, cum still dripping down from his chin.

“i want more, please?” he didn’t waste time making his way back up to meet your lips with his, allowing you to taste yourself on him. he hastily made an effort to undo his jeans and pull out his dick, and shift so that he can like himself up with your entrance, teasing your clit with his tip.

“this good baby?”

“yes, please kirk?” you whined, shutting your eyes tightly at the sensation of his hard cock being pushed into your warm, wet pussy. kirk’s eyes fluttered shut and his lips parted, a soft groan being drawn from his lips before he started moving hollowly. you continued whining and moaning, kirk moved down closer to you again to lick all over the little bruises he’d left on your collarbone previously, moving down to your tits to grab one and lick your nipple before taking as much as he could in his mouth, starting to thrust deeper and faster. your hands left his hair and one grabbed onto his hand as he started rubbing your clit in tight circles, causing you to gasp and moan loudly even more from the feeling of overstimulation.

“mnh, kirk! i’m- i’m-ahh” you were unable to finish any coherent sentence, only whines and cries of pleasure made it out between your lips.

“i know baby, i’m gonna cum soon, you feel so good.” he groaned loudly, still keeping his attention on your chest and moving up again to kiss you deeply, picking up his speed even more as his hips began to stutter. you came for the second time, walls contracting tightly around his twitching dick. he pulled out, giving his cum coated cock a few pumps before releasing onto your chest and stomach with another groan. he exhaled, then slumped down next to you on the bed, both of you breathing heavily.

“oh my fucking god!” you exclaimed as soon as your breath was caught, “that was… amazing.” you shut your eyes and smiled, leaning against kirk’s shoulder. he smiled and laughed softly.

“i did not expect any of that at all.” your words were drawn out and tired, as you were struggling to keep your eyes open.

“so it was good?”

“yes it was good!!” you looked up at him, meeting his eyes with a thrilled smile. he smiled proudly and kissed you once more.

“good.”

[sueheesblog]

Let's talk about some stuff! SZN 3: SPOILERS I watched the season after I saw some spoilers on X and from friends lmao. I didn't sleep. Sorry for the typos n shit. I need to vent.

- First off, Syd and Cousin carried the whole fxcking SZN on their backs, while Carmy was too busy being a psycho. Ayo n Ebon deserves all the awards. JAW is a fantastic actor - 10/10 for all 3 of them. Everyone else did great too, Napkin was 😭😭😭 AYO DID THAT. Those 3 are legends in my eyes!!!! If Ayo leaves or if the writers do her dirtier in SZN 4 I'm DONE. I cried for her this SZN, n for Carm too.

- All of Sydcamry scenes for some reason gave me butterflies even though they drifted farther apart each eps. Syd getting Carmy's dish was top tier - incredible writing from the writers. I just need them to explain more - what is the purpose of having Syd n Carmy tied together - if Claire is so great why not tied her to Carmy? Why does she seem like someone who died, haunting Carmy like his toxic boss? She more unbearable this season n I think it's intentional.

- Some ppl were saying Claire had alittle more substance this SZN and I beg to differ. She's like a dead gf to me. Her scenes with Carmy are so cold, dead, and heavy - like a burden. She triggers my anxiety n I don't know y - n I don't want to be mean, but just how their scene are edited, it literally puts me at the edge of a panic attack. The writers had the audacity to call her PEACE. I did not experience peace watching her scene and I think Carmy feels the same way from the jump. So, Fxck no, she ain't PEACE, that's Syd and it's obvious.

- Claire being labeled as PEACE makes no sense - the writers are trying too hard n it's make me sick. If she's so great, let her n Carmy run/manage The Bear.

- Syd is the invisible string that's holding everyone together in this chaotic sh!thole, while babysitting Carmy and keeping him from combusting. Unc, Nat, Pete, COUSIN, Marcus, and everyone else are staying afloat because Syd is the fxcking life vest that's strapped to their chest.

- Syd is calm, organized, observant, caring, considerate etc. Yet, these fxcking writers said Claire was peace- that line had my blood boilingggggggg.

- Syd's relationship with her Dad is everything

- Sydcarmy is sooo far apart it physically hurts. They didn't even do ther sign thing over their chest this season.......I get this feeling (just a FEELING) that Syd might be in love or has a crush on CARMY 😭😭😭. The margin wider scene gave me that vibe. When you like someone, you notice every little thing they do. There were times I wanted her to hug him soooo bad, I just felt like if she did if would've grounded him. He really needed a hug this season.

- Something I think some of you might have missed. Remember SZN1 Ep1 when Syd said her dad ate at The Beef on Sundays. We got confirmation from Carm, in SZN 3 that The Beef/The Bear only closes on Sundays. 😂😂🤣😂 (this was in the scene with him n Claire in a dark room or whatever. It might have been a dream scene idk) So, Carm knew Syd lied. I need the writers to have Carm n Syd talk about it and the meal she had in NYC. These are only a few important stuff they hid in the storytelling and I need to know WHYYYYYYYY.

- Carmy had a panic attack during service. Syd's voice took him off the edge. And I must say, her voice could really calm me down too lmao.

These fxcking writers are lowkey abusing Syd at this point. She's being stretched thin, and again this is also why I think she's in love with Carmy. It hurts her, but she's so into him, connected to him physically n mentally. It's really hard for her to let him or The Bear. It reminds me of the time Donna said "I make things pretty for others, but no one makes things pretty for me" not being verbatim lol. Syd did sooo much heavy lifting this SZN and no one noticed it, they all subconsciously over look her and gave all praises to Claire and making her the peace and angel.

- We finally saw Syd broke tf down in ep 10. Baby girl couldn't be strong anymore. She doesn't want to leave Carmy or The Bear but after the round table talk with the workers from Ever. She realized that Carmy - the person she idolize or even love/crush on, might not be good for her. Carmy is trying but the communication is lacking so bad, and on top of that he's pushing her away.

At this point, the partnership agreement seems like a trap to keep her. If Unc cut his connection to The Bear that's going to be Syd last straw. And if she leaves, I kinda see Tina, Marcus, and maybe COUSIN going with her or they will stay and give Carmy HELLL for losing her. The tables would turn. Everyone is so hang up on Claire leaving, if Syd leaves, Claire would go straight through the window. That would be the moment of realization (for all of them. Especially Carmy) that the woman he really NEEDS is Syd and not Claire. But for some reason, they all think Syd ain't going nowhere which is so naive. She got a bigggg offer and I can't wait to see when she tells Carmy. Would he confess her importance to him to keep her? Would he beg her to stay? Would he listen more or communicate more to keep her? Would he ask her what would make her stay at The Bear? Or would he be a b!tch and tell her to go cauase it's a great opportunity? And then after confess that he's having a hard time letting her go. Very interesting stuff.

- Last thing - Unc talking to Syd. I was shock he was looking to Syd for answers as to what's going on with Carmy. This was also telling. Unc believes or senses that these too are CLOSE. And Syd being a good gf/partner kept her mouth closed. SYD is an angel sent from heaven, cause I would be so done with The Bear😭😭😭😭.

We saw that Carmy and Syd are having conversations that we are not seeing on screen. For example, he asked her about her new apartment. When did she tell him?? He then asked about her dad. Sir, what about her dad? Did she tell him about the annoying bathroom exchange? Are they sharing more about their personal life that we, the audience is not seeing? So many fxcking questions in SZN3.

This is just my thoughts. I saw the season once so this not an analysis.

[astro-rainbow777]

Astrology Observations ⋆⁺₊⋆ 𖤐 Volume 3 𖤐⋆⁺₊⋆

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ Good Afternoon friends! I hope you enjoy my observations that I’ve gathered. I am not a professional astrologer so please take these with a grain of salt 🫶

Take what resonates, Leave what doesn’t! Only you know what is best for you 😊

✨Enjoy! ✨

✧ Sagittarius Risings usually have family from different countries/parts of the world. If not, family can have a different cultural background and distance from the native. They also tend to get a lot of attention and comments because of the way they walk/have a generally noticeable lower half…hehehe

✧ Libra Moons are sooo sweet, good intended and charming. Me being a spiritually passionate person, the topic of soulmates never escape a conversation with a Libra moon. I want to remind allll Libra placements that there is more to Love than the romantic kind! Again it is very endearing, but you guys have the tendency to form peer relationships around the topic of romantic love at the center. So when y’all are finally in a relationship- there goes everyone else in your life. Of course this is not all Libra placements but there are some I’ve met like this. If you are a friend of a Libra moon, please try being supportive of whom ever they decide to crush on- even if you don’t agree. When you reject who a Libra moon loves, it’s like you’re rejecting them. Remember that they tie a big part of their ability to love others. In doing this you may forfeit them being authentic with you. Bonus points if they have Aquarius personal placements! You may get ghosted 👻

✧ Virgos, especially Virgo stelliums, why are you so good at EVERYTHING?!?! Like, y’all are the prodigies of life! So unfair, I have zero earth placements- there are days where I’m lucky if I can walk straight. But y’all? Y’all will try something once and be consider a master. Virgo risings have usually have Gemini midheavens- so you may be consider a jack of all trades. So much versatility and flexibility. I’m obsessed with y’all 😐

✧ Venus in the 12th: you guys are just the kindest, most selfless, beautiful souls! I love love love love you. I’m so close with a lot of you. That being said, you have THE WORST taste in romantic partners. No actually. At least one relationship in your life you have been a secret to someone. I genuinely feel for you people because y’all are so loving. Have the type of broken, egoic, heartless people- your intentions are good, but you can’t let people take advantage of you! You are just as guilty if you reward bad behavior. In health tho, yalls love is just so pure. Beware of substance abuse with this placement. Can also love fall in love with the idea of someone. Prone to day dreaming about potential partners, than falling in love with your thoughts about them <3 it’s kind of sweet in a way because your brain is so beautiful it falls in love with it’s self. These people turn trash into treasure in their own dome 🤕

✧ Sun in the 7th people are so popular! Everyone knows them-they usually have a pretty clean reputation too! You guys are pretty likable, at work y’all have sooo many connections.

✧ Saturn in the 9th can be very dogmatic in their beliefs. Now, the ones that I have met have experience some traumatic events to make them so opinionated. But there seems to be a disconnect between that one experience and the collective. For example) one guy I work has a Transgender cousin who SA’d some woman, so now he really believes that all people who are transgender are bad people. Which is not the truth obviously. But that’s their truth…so it is THE truth 😬 yikes

Mars in 1st house people can come off very strong…yes, but if you don’t know these people they can come off as just rude, aggressive, or annoying. When you really get to know these people it’s very common though to find that they are just very protective of themselves and that’s why they can be an intense personality. Y’all have a Sand paper first impression..does that make sense? Haha, no but for real y’all are warriors- usually these people have had violence/aggression in their home at a very early age. That being said, it’s very important when meeting new people that they establish their “dominance”- does that make sense?

Mars in Libra-ruled by Venus, these people had to have invented being fashionably late, always! Y’all need a timer strapped to you at all times! Love you tho, always thinking of how their actions will affect others.

Cancer Risings are sooooo pretty and soft. No fr! Your skin is so soft and plushie! Also your eyes twinkle, especially the woman. Y’all are sooo beautiful too when you’re taking care of someone you love, your just in your element.

Moon in the 3rd/Gemini don’t stick with one feeling for too long. As a result, if you are venting to some with this placement, don’t expect them to wallow with you in your feelings. Their type of cheering up is distracting you from them! That’s only what they know though! They do the same thing for themselves. But if your a sensitive soul, try a fire/water moon if you want someone to feel with you.

Individuals with a fifth house stellium may have an earlier introduction to parent hood or struggle with infidelity. Especially if Saturn is here. Life of the party tho!

Jupiter in the 8th, do people just give/buy you things? I have mine here and I don’t even have to ask people just give me stuff! Especially like hand me downs and food. I don’t even ask! It’s weird. Jupiter shows abundance and the 8th rules over other peoples possessions, so It’s a possibility that this is a manifestation of that placement 😏

Some Scorpio + Taurus Big 3 women I’ve met are VERY open about their sexual kinks- like post on social media about sex a lot. The ones I’ve met have a fascination with being a dominatrix/bondage? I know this doesn’t apply to all but just some that I’ve seen. Also posting about money, posting things that they want others to buy for them?

Thanks you for Reading✨

Let me know what you resonate with or don’t resonate with in the comments! I love feedback 💕

[malakhim]

what is being in lolita fashion on a day to day basis like? theres a lot of reasons why i cant and dont right now but what do people even say? im no stranger to being seen as a freak so thats not concerning me but im very curious. thanks

Wearing lolita for me is chill mostly. I imagine it varies a lot based on where you live and what substyles you wear. I wear mostly old school, casual and gothic. I think over the top gothic styles are somewhat in the public consciousness so people go "Oh it's one of those goth kids" while my old school clothes make people think I look like a doll or someone into vintage clothes. Casual coords can pass as me just being a stylish person. I get a lot of questions and compliments, and occasionally, someone will know what lolita is and compliment my coord or ask where I get my clothes. Old people love it most of the time. Not all of them though. My family is really like.. the weirdest about it, but they've backed off for the most part now that I've been dressing like this for quite some time now though I still mostly wear casual coords around them. I wore it to a family reunion, and people were really chill about it so I think that helped my immediate family calm down a bit when they realized I wouldn't be treated like a freakazoid. Occasionally, I meet someone who knows a lot about Japanese culture but doesn't know what lolita is exactly; they can just tell I'm wearing a Japanese fashion. Often an interesting conversation starts. It happened to me at the somnologist a few weeks ago, and it also happened with my cousin at the family reunion. It can also happen with some people who watch anime or make anime inspired art. It's fun... I like making conversation with people, but I imagine it can be a bit overwhelming if you don't like talking to strangers. It also might be less of a thing where a culture of hospitality isn't as much of a thing haha. I've had very few negative interactions but they have happened... Most I've talked about online in semi public spaces. Like the guy in England who asked me if I wanted to dress like Annabelle and blew smoke in my face.. I just walked away from him... And I've been catcalled and approached by weird guys.. Usually I just make an excuse to leave. But that also happened when I dressed in plain goth/alt fashion, so I'm kind of used to it. It also doesn't happen frequently enough that I feel in danger or troubled by it. I'm also so sooo autistic. There's a chance someone has been mean to me but I just didn't realize lol.

[lunerians]

would YOU like to hear some fun kieran and florian facts from my apple of my eye series? here you go.

regarding sweet foods and sweets, kieran has a preference for fruit-flavored stuff, but not the artificial ones! I feel like he'd also like tanghulu as well as other candied fruits.

kieran used to drink energy drinks almost daily pre-indigo disk, but he doesn't drink them as much anymore.

florian's choice of caffiene is tea! mainly because it's a common staple from galar. they like to put sugar and creamer in their teas, and have a preference for black teas. early grey is probably his favorite tea, though he loves trying out all sorts of teas.

since moving to paldea, though, florian's more open to drinking coffee; kieran, on the other hand, despises coffee because it tastes bitter.

florian also usually carries a big thermos of hot tea since it can get really cold in the early mornings and at night.

even though they both run a little hot, they actually love wearing each other's outerwear (jackets, sweatshirts, sweaters, etc.) are they both dying in the heat? yes. are they going to take off their jacket? no. after all, it's their favorite person's clothes :)

florian probably smells really clean, like laundry detergent or the outdoors, whereas kieran always smells like candied apples. his hydrapple loves getting pets and playing around with him, so its supersweet syrup ability kinda just. rubbed off on him. permanently.

so florian's obviously from galar, right? but did you know that he's actually cousins with elio (protag from pkmn sun in alola)? both of his alolan regional forms (ninetails and raichu) were caught there when their family went to visit a few years back

also their raichu is shiny. because I have a shiny raichu named hersey.

florian is also very well known as like. That Guy that shows up whenever and usually in the weirdest places. they spend most of their time in the wild shiny hunting for pokemon (and he has a tendency to just. not check his phone at all for hours) so ppl just cannot get a hold of him unless he’s like. in the same physical space as them.

kieran's the sole exception (plus his mother) of ppl florian actually responds to on time. they’re also probably the only ppl in his favorite contacts, just so that he still gets their notifs when he’s on dnd (which is. all the time. shiny hunting requires a lot of focus!!)

on the topic of phones. kieran gets one. its a plot reason but he gets one eventually. he really wanted to wait until he saw florian again so he could have them as the first person in his contacts but carmine wouldnt let him (he has to contact his family somehow! kieran was kinda miffed about it)

kieran’s sooo a default texter. like normal caps and autocorrect. he still spells a few things wrong but he fixed it in another msg if he can. he also doesn't msg as often since he’s not used to having a phone and generally uses it to keep in touch with his friends and family.

if kieran has any social media its def to just research the trends in the competitive scene (and most of his posts are reddit style where he does intense theorycrafting with other competitve nerds)

florian's also like. ghost level texter. they will leave you on read (not actually, they turned that off so penny would stop getting mad at him for not replying for days.) he’s definitely very casual regarding tone and doesn’t talk much via text. he is, however, a big fan of calls! especially calling kieran (to no one’s surprise)

kieran's also the only one that florian actually texts to in a somewhat expressive manner. when kieran shows his texts with florian to the others theyre all like. are we talking about the same person. are you sure that’s florian and not an imposter.

[thebeastofblackmoor]

Hi hi hello Cambria here on my main blog I have zero braincells to add any thoughts to this message but what are your Clara Thornton thoughts specifically I loved your comic so so much and that you even thought to make comparison between her and that phenomenon with birds it is so unnerving and also the panel at the end with Jackson and her having the same expression ….. AAHHH anyways. I am always here to talk about Clara and GTH if you have more thoughts this is me asking you to please share them and I will listen

OH MY GOD THANK YOU ily cambria GOD i wish we knew more concrete stuff about her childhood so that there was more to discuss. like surely there was some real and not just perceived form of alienation between Clara herself and her cousins' family when she was taken to live there, but we don't get any evidence of it in the game which I think is just tragic. Like it doesn't seem like something Clara would ever mention organically because of her desire to appear strong, Harper probably wouldn't mention it because she might have been too young or naive to pick up on it, and Wade probably never knew that such tensions even existed.

Like by all accounts Roger and Marie were great people and parents, but given their demanding jobs, the fact that they already had two children, and the fact that they presumably didn't have much info on grief and trauma and how to guide children through it, it's very possible they were just never there for Clara in the same way they were there for their own kids. I mentioned in another post that because grief in children surrounding parental loss often comes with a lot of resentment, it's possible that young Clara pushed herself away from her new family, and they just didn't know how to respond to that, didn't know how normal it was, and thus never treated her as one of them. I want to know so badly what they did, no matter how well-intentioned, that would leave Clara feeling like she'd ever be pushed out of the family after being taken in by them as an actual child and living with them for 8+ years. That would be a seriously major insult after being brought up with them!!!

Or was it because of the possible incest thing? Lately I'm back to thinking that that may have actually been intentional from the writers!

Idk this story is just sooo complex and rich and I'm honestly both glad it exists in a Nancy Drew game so that the dark parts can be understated and we can imagine our own backstories and also sad that it has to be so limited because I would also read a full novel or watch a whole Netflix original series about the Thorntons of Blackrock.

I also wish we got more info about the eventual reconciliation of the Thornton family. To what level was Clara a part of that? If she wasn't, and all her lifelong fears were confirmed at the end of the game, that would be really tragic. It would make sense, since her manipulation of Harper and Wade may have left their relationships far beyond repair, but god wouldn't that be a sad corruption story? And did Clara go to jail for what happened in 1989? (I kind of doubt it, given her socioeconomic status, the fact that the fire was so many years ago and may have been entirely accidental, etc., but who knows.)

But then, by the end of the game, Jessalyn is at the core of the family, not Clara or Harper or Wade, and she seems to have a lot of love and forgiveness for her mother. And maybe Clara could start to become a new person now that she's not being burdened by this horrible secret and if she sees that she will always have at least some of her family! I love a story whose theme is that it's never too late to change, and that shows that change comes because of love and support!

Do they all do holidays together? Does Jessalyn ever drag them all on tropical family vacations, even though Harper doesn't really like her cousins, Wade sees maybe an hour of sunlight per year, and Clara hasn't had fun in twenty years?? Do Harper and Clara try to kill each other with carving knives on Thanksgiving? I just need so much more on this deeply fucked up but also very funny family.

[thegeminisage]

star trek update time! last night we watched ds9's "vortex" and "battle lines." mwah. every day i wish tng's pussy could pop like ds9's does.

vortex (ds9):

ANOTHER ODO EPISODE! was i not JUST saying i wish he had more to do

i really really really liked this one...i love that odo has such a strong sense of right and wrong. it would be wrong to take this's guy stone. it would be wrong to release a prisoner he was duty-bound to transport. it would also be wrong to orphan this man's daughter. he has a strict moral code, but it's his own moral code, not starfleet's.

AND it affects the people around him. that guy was totally gonna leave odo for dead and then changed his mind. LOVE that <3

obviously it's sad that this guy is lying, but it's only season 1...AND we got an official species name and a semi-alive stone odo can call "cousin" which is both sad and kind of funny

i liked how when odo wanted answers he went to quark and was threatening and quark was like brushing him off like girl i don't know ANYTHING til he saw odo was serious and then he also got serious. quark isn't always my favorite character bc i dont like the ferengi BUT i DO really like the way he can shift his energy to match the situation instead of remaining rigid - like getting scared when finding out his friends were his game pieces.

some of the alien's digs were sooo mean. my favorite was "THEY (the other changelings) don't keep a humanoid form." really speaks to odo feeling outside of his own community...which means now of course that he's my favoritest specialest little guy. where's that post about star trek characters with autism...he can join the autism gang with spock and data. i think when we get to the end of s1 i'll be ready to do a character rank.

battle lines (ds9):

THIS ONE FUCKED! before getting into the big obvious stuff i actually liked the minor character work it did for bashir - he volunteers to go because "its a slow day 😇" and then proves useful at both flying and repairing the ship, and EVEN got a few rare noncomedic moments in. as much as i love to giggle at this guy i really appreciate they gave him some serious stuff - both wondering if it was ethical to help these people die and then being absolutely disgusted when the folks in question wanted to turn his idea into a weapon for slaughter.

talking to these people is like TALKING TO A WALL. no wonder kira wanted to distance herself from them...and no wonder she recognized herself in them. this whole sitch was practically designed to trigger her ptsd. i love what a great actress she is - she wasn't just crying on cue, she was sobbing with like spit and everything, which is gross, but god damn

more o'brien this episode though imho still not enough. i wanted him to have more stuff to do on ds9. give him something to do!!!

i really really like kai opaka...i'm glad she's not Dead dead but she might as well be. i feel like she's the only kind of person who could get through to those people.

i like where they rolled credits bc it made both of us go DAMN HOLY SHIT aloud but i also wonder what will happen when they go back without the prophet...feels like there'll be hell to pay

TONIGHT, hopefully: tng's "the chase" and ds9's "the storyteller"

[madmadmilk]

lol why else do i log into this account besides to complain? (idk if that sentence even makes sense lol)

but wedding planning rant below >>>>> ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

basic facts about us/the wedding: my bf and i have been together for 10 years, ya we've been talking about weddings but can't justify the $$$. then in feb we said fuck it, we'll never be able to afford a house lets just get married. sooo we've been cram planning through the year while doing comic/anime onventions for our wedding in august this year, yipppeee!!! we both have huge families, and tbh we don't have much drama between us but (of course) there's a lot of tension between family members everywhere. but main consensus is that we're both well liked and loved, so everyone is happy. (yay!) wedding planning has been stressful and fun, but also kind of made me conscious of things i literally don't care about.

the problem:

soooooooooo i don't want a big wedding party (but my mom wants me to give every single family member a role in the wedding -- no.). so i have a party of my sister, two close cousins, and a very good friend. yay? right!! should be, YAY, right???????

hm, so last week, i noticed that one of my cousins, we'll call her cousin A, hasn't really been replying or seen in a month? so that was like weird, and i've noticed some weird stuff but like... idk the world doesn't revolve around me (or my wedding) so I just assumed that life was being life, and gave space.

well.

suddenly cousin A's mom blocks and unfriends most of my family across social media. (cousin A's dad is my mom's sister etc they have a lot of sisters) then everyone goes ???

even i'm like ??? cos i'm still on their friend list.

THEN, cousin A tells me she has to tell me something...

she says that her parents are struggling, and that she hasn't spoken to her dad in a month (my maternal uncle? idk if i phrased that right). and of course, life is life-- i have no judgment, only sympathy for everyone. BUT that means that she and her mom cut off everyone in my family..... because they don't want her dad to spread rumors etc, and don't know who has been told what...

cousin A and her mom wish to disappear from our lives.

???????????

like i said before, life is life, i can't understand their situation-- i dont' know all the sides, but i have immense sympathy for the situation. obviously i dont' want people to fight, i want people to be happy and able to live their lives to the fullest.

so---- though this is not the most important part>> she says that she and her mom and family will not attend my wedding. she's unsure of being there because she doesn't want to face questions and scrunity.

i understand.

i'm just horribly sad over it.

of course i didn't write all the details, but i'm just so sad over this. cousin a is like a sister to me, and i have a horribly hard time getting close to people. i'm so introverted and terrible at keeping up, and i haven't always been the most present for her but.. it just makes me really sad to watch her pull away.

a selfish part of me wishes she could just be there for me, but i understand she needs to go her own way and figure things out at her own pace.

just makes me sad.

and worse, i can't tell anyone about this because no one (on my side of the family) know why they've been distant. no one knows that she's said some bad things about them. no one knows the vague-posting they've been doing freakin facebook. it feels pretty irreparable to me, but no one has seen it all yet. then-- cousin A's family is going on a big trip together, just her, her parents , and her BF and she said who knows maybe they'll make up. maybe things will return.

i don't know what to say to that.

i'm grateful that she called me to give me an explanation instead of leaving me hanging, but it hurt my feelings to be told matter-of-factly. of course, this is something that her family has to work out but yeah.

i probably sound so selfish, but i can't even talk to my mom about this. there's too much of this that is not my story to tell or talk about. too many unkind words said, over something that might... return to "normal." kind of just feel miserable about it.

i wish there was an easy solution, i wish there was a way for ME to just.. be understanding and chill out but it's just sad. i'm not good at keeping secrets, or sitting still. but i'm trying to just focus on myself.

we'll see what happens.

people are going to ask me questions soon, idk what to tell them.

if things turn out to be "okay," then "great." i'll just have some lingering bitterness.

yippee!

TL;DR: one of my bridal party (a cousin), is in the middle of excommunicating my family (over internal family matters)-- thus dropping out. of course it is sad and distressing, i'm trying to be understanding. i'm sad i'm losing a sister, and that she isn't choosing me.

^lol that makes me sound terrible tbh haha. like i said, lots of stuff can't be said but yeah... just sad. i'm literally not going to fill her spot, because doing so would make me feel worse. i'm too sentimental.

[imaginarycyberpunk2023]

Helloooo :3 from the otp questions, for Vinnie and Macha: 3, 6, 12, 19, 23, 24? :D

Thank you@elvenbeard 🧡 sooo many, and I had to think hard about some of these!

The good thing about me getting back to your ask so late is I can now post a proper pic of them together instead of a collage 🙌🏻. Oh my goodness, the way she looks at him. Yes!

3. What’s their favorite thing to tease each other about?

Control. They are constantly teasing each other about being or not being in control.

He always tells her that she likes to be a controlling bish, and she tells him that he actually likes being told what to do. (They are both right)

In the bedroom? They switch dynamic. Just so you know. 👀

6. Do they have pet names for each other? Do they like them?

I’ll start with Macha first. She calls him “Cubs” because she is older (6 years), and they talked about her being his cougar, which she thinks is hilarious. He likes being her cub and also being called that. She sometimes calls him boo bc she likes the sound of that, and he likes that as well. And if she wants something from him or wants to flatter him, she calls him “my king” and he’s ALL OVER THAT.

He calls her “Kitten” mostly - she reminds him of a kitten bc she is playful and cute and has no idea how sharp her claws are and that they can hurt. She loves being called that. It makes her feel special. He calls most other women “dollface” and that’s what he called her until she got upgraded to his Kitten. He also calls her princess from time to time and she pretends to not like it but then she always has those lyrics in her head from that Alanis Morisette song and she gets all giddy and she doesn’t really object (they go “ you treat me like Im a princess, I’m not used to liking that”)

12. What struggle have they seen each other through?

They haven't figured out one of them yet - moving in together. They both like the idea, but they also value their own space and kind of order (or ordered chaos) they have.

Vinnie is much more minimalistic by the way so his place is more organized.

And Macha values her alone time so much that she can't imagine having him around all the time (which he would prefer).

(I do have a lot of struggles for them in my head but they are all WIP so this will have to do for now)

19. What values do they not share? How do they reconcile those differences?

Family is super important for Vinnie because he didn't have much family time growing up because of losing his parents. He does have a lot of cousins, though. They are pretty tight, and he adored his grandma. He felt very drawn to the Valentinos when they took him in because they immediately felt like a chosen family to him, and he still hangs out with them often.

Macha, on the other hand, is glad she doesn't have a lot of contact with her family anymore because family life was traumatizing for her, constant breaking of boundaries, high expectations, and a lot of constraints. She values her independence now and finally feels emancipated from her parents. She has a big immediate family and patchwork style because her dad remarried twice. Lots of half siblings. She does get along with them, but they don't see each other often.

Vinnie is very curious about meeting her parents, but she doesn't want that. So for now, they hang with his friends and family, and she leaves whenever it gets too much for her. Vinnie respects that she decides when it's time to meet the family.

23. What was their first impression of each other?

Vinnie thought she was pretty and sassy. He liked that she was blunt and to the point. He wondered about her capabilities bc she didn't let him know all the stuff she could do.

Machas first thought was "Damn, he tall. And... cute." And she was kind of flustered that he started flirting right away but couldn't resist flirting back - which isn't her usual mode.

24. How did they fall for each other?

Macha fell for him pretty quickly. There was a moment during their first gig together (basically the day after they met) where he had to protect her physically and he did so quickly and effortlessly and she couldn't help but feel very attracted to that. She had always looked out for herself up until that point, so someone suddenly having her back like this made her feel all kinds of things. She did not act on her feelings quickly, though, because she knew he was a womanizer and she wasn't looking to be his next fling. She wanted something serious. She chose Vinnie for a multitude of reasons, but the important thing is that she chose him very consciously, and she had never done that before in her relationships (she settled for the men).

Vinnie took longer. Granted, he wanted to get into her pants from the beginning but she didn't react to his usual advances which confused him. She was still very friendly and even affectionate with him. So he asked her out on a date because he assumed she needed that to give into him.

But that date and what followed was so different from what he usually experienced with women that his interest and curiosity grew steadily (apart from one incident at The Afterlife 👀 they didn't get intimate until weeks later, which was unheard of for him). He fell for her when he realized she was interested in his true self and did not want to change anything about who he was.

[swanmaids]

for the prompt list i found: ‘it was an expensive mistake’ sooo compelling!! 😁

thank you so much!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

When did I realise my error? It is a question that I have thought on much. In a way, I suppose I always knew. My uncle's Oath- it was folly, of course it was. I shan't give myself too much credit for seeing that from the start, since frankly an idiot could have realised that such a vow was only going to end in tears- so I'm not sure what it says about his sons, that they didn't.

Of course, my next actions say nothing good about me, either.

Why did I come to Middle Earth? That question too has kept me awake many nights. When my wife and I decided to leave Aman, we were thinking of our daughter. I don't deny that it sounds ludicrous, considering what I know now, but it's the truth. When the Spider killed the Trees and the Dark Enemy killed my grandfather, the Blessed Realm became a dark and frightening place, and Elenwë and I were caught in a great fear for our daughter. I suppose with all the Noldor swept in a rush to go, to go now, we came to think that Middle Earth would be a better place for Idril, too.

Perhaps we were both a little mad, back then.

Or perhaps I would simply like to think that I was mad, for how else can I explain what I did next? Surely I could not have been sane, when I followed my brother to Alqualondë, when I raised my newly-forged sword in that haven with all the grace of a toddler brandishing a stick, when I murdered my kinsman for - what? Because I followed my brother, who followed his cousin, who followed his father, and none of us stopped to question or to think? It is a poor excuse to take a man’s life.

After that, there was no turning back for me- the Doomsman was more than clear. But I could still have saved my wife and child, and I say to you this, I did try. I told my wife to take Idril and turn back with my uncle- we had thought that Middle Earth would be safer for her, but the deaths and the Doom made it clear that was folly. But Elenwë was stubborn, and said she would not be parted from me, and so together we pressed onwards.

We had never seen the Ice before. We did not know the nature of the beast that we faced.

Perhaps it was on the Ice that I knew the true nature of my error. Certainly here in Mandos, the Weaver shows me the same scenes often. Here is my wife, falling in terror, drowning and lost. Here is my father, his longsword raised to cut away the blackened stumps of my daughter's legs. As if I could ever forget!

The histories say that I hated Fëanor and his sons for the burning of the ships and the condemnation of my father's Host to the Ice, and they are true, I hated them then and I hate them still. I hate myself yet more. It is I who should have drowned then- what had my wife and child done but follow me, believing I would lead them to a better life? Yes, when Elenwë was lost to me, it was as though all that was joyful and loved the world within me drained away, and I lived each day as though through a black mist.

By the time Idril and I reached Beleriand, I knew what a mistake I had made to try to come to Middle Earth at all, but life had not yet finished reminding me. First my younger brother, butchered by orcs. My sister, held captive in darkness, then slain by the one who should have cherished her. My father killed by the enemy himself, his corpse left outside my city gates. Finrod, my friend and more than friend, betrayed by our cousins to die in darkness and despair. And finally my elder brother, cleaved almost in two by the foul balrog's axe in front of my own eyes.

My city remained- my city was safe. Gondolin had allowed Idril to reach adulthood in peace and beauty, the last of the great Elven cities in Beleriand. Even when Ulmo’s blessed messenger warned me, I still could not believe that it would truly fail her - just one last mistake, as it turned out.

So there is the sum total of my exile- myself a murderer of kin, my wife dead, my family and my dearest friend dead, my city destroyed and my people slaughtered and scattered, my daughter and my grandson left to face Morgoth’s wastelands alone. How many ways can a man fail? As a husband, a father, and a king, I failed them all. So many people paid for my failures, and the cost was high indeed.

I do not think I shall ever leave these Halls. Each of the Weaver’s tapestries of my life is one more reason why I deserve no such mercy.

[bigbrotherlouis]

sorting out my emotions under the cut:

ughh i am conflicted about moving to boston. it's not a for sure yet but decisions sometimes come slowly for me because i have to be okay with the change and the loss of other opportunities.

i really wanted to move to manchester. so many people i know are there or moving there and it felt right but nothing was coming through legal-wise or job-wise which makes it currently untenable. i can't tell if these conflicted emotions are just sadness and grief from the amount of loss this summer + putting my dream of staying in europe on hold for now, or because it's not the right decision and i should keep fighting. not that i necessarily think that there is a singular one right decision intellectually, but it's hard to untangle that on a emotions level. also i'm trying to remind myself that i am young and i can move. i can always leave and move somewhere else. i do not get tied to places just because i live there for a while. i hate feeling trapped in a city and it's hard for me to fight the instinct that i am stuck and can never leave.

anyway. to counteract all this, i've been trying to think of ways i want to add what i'm calling attainable joy - things that make me excited to move and settle somewhere for a while. i'm putting them here.

a top priority is russian languages classes! i would love to be fluent in about three years, which i think is possible if i keep up at it. my hope is one day to be good enough to translate and keep that as a skill in my back pocket.

there's a lot of non-audition choirs in boston and i love communal singing! i would love to do that again.

i have lost so much flexibility and i don't like it, and i liked dancing, so i would love to do some beginner dance classes. depression makes it hard to exercise for me but exercise makes me feel better so it's a delicate balance.

decorating an apartment and having all my stuff in one place is sooo attractive. i haven't been able to have all my belongings in the same place for literally ten years. it's time.

the family i love so much is in boston! i would love to be part of their daily lives again. also my friends are getting married soon live there! my cousins! it would be good

i've been thinking of becoming a fulbright scholar and that's a long process. this would give me space to do that!

working remotely would hopefully give me some space to focus on original fiction, which would be lovely, as well as some additional research.

my parents are thinking about new york, which is close enough to visit on weekends occasionally. i like living near to my parents (or with my parents!) and that distance feels nice.

i haven't started my job yet but i think i will really like it. the girl who hired me is a good friend and i'm excited to work with her in a professional setting. it's also with a demographic i'm very passionate about, work that i think will enjoy, has good connections for future career options, and will be a good building block on my resume.

i have not given up the hope of a phd, and i want to go back to the UK for that. i like the system and i loved qub.

okay okay that's making me feel a little better. argghhh being an adult is HARD sometimes like trying to navigate decisions and trying to predict what is going to branch off because of each decision. i'm working through it though and i have to get through this autumn in california first

[crymeariveronceagain]

Okay, so, I missed the prompt for yesterday but I still want to do it. Sooo. Here we goo.

What Kotlc means to me

There's something kind of special about how I got here, in a really strange way. There's something special about it. Being 15 and trying to read every single book in the library. Picking up a book because I need somewhere else to go, someone else's life to live. Reading the entire series through Nightfall in 3 days.

I never looked back, to be honest? I had huge opinions and my cousin had read the books and another friend of mine has also read the books so I talked about it with them, and the Flashback came out and I read it and got so annoyed with Fitz and Alden. Like, literally. Part of my love and attachment to this series was born from my distinct hatred of specific characters.

And I'd never been one to write fanfic. My mom had thoroughly pounded it into my head that fanfic wasn't real writing, and that I should be doing more real things with my work. I guess, with kotlc? I decided that didn't matter?

Who cares if it's not real writing, I enjoy it deeply and I loved sharing it with other people? It brought so much joy to me when I was able to capture the voices of Keefe and Sophie in Walk Through Hell. I remember sitting there and thinking "This sounds like something Shannon would write".

And I remember recommending the books to everyone. My then-boyfriend took me up on reading it, and fell in love with it, too, and I think that was the only time he ever liked my writing, when I sent him the Google doc for Walk Through Hell.

I was a Pinterest fan for a long while, and Tumblr posts in the making lurk in the comments sections of the kotlc pins. I went on mini rants about how Keefe and Sophie and even Fitz, even though I changed my tune about him after a while of character analysis. But nobody really interacts on Pinterest. Comments get likes or maybe a comment back, but it's not a social media. It's just media. No social. Like YouTube.

So like, in a really dark part of my life, I started posting stuff to AO3. And it just opened up this world where I could write and discuss my thoughts through my writing? If I had something to say I could say it, even if it was writing a fanfic about it and posting it, qnd people would see it! People would comment, or leave kudos!! It was insane.

And, eventually, I joined Tumblr.

You would not believe how freaked out I was the first time @hunkyhair-my-beloved interacted with one of my posts. Like. Holy crap. You guys don't understand how much of my Pinterest collection of kotlc stuff was their incorrect quotes. Like, not even kidding. I literally felt like I was interacting with a celebrity.

So, I guess.

Kotlc is writing stories. Kotlc is getting mad at characters and writing a 6k dissertation on why they're awful, or a 10k thesis about why they're misunderstood. Kotlc is reading the tags of the people who reblog stuff from me. Kotlc is rolling my eyes at @fintan-pyren. Kotlc is giggling at incorrect quotes and crying when I think about songs that fit Keefe's character. Kotlc is sharing my stupid media analysis with people who actually love hearing it, and enjoy my nonsense enough to stick around and come back for more.

Like, I look back on it now and I'm like, ah, yes. I coped with my spiraling life by writing about Linh Song in a similar situation to me. I wrote about Sophie to understand myself. I wrote about Keefe to get inside my own head and understand the pieces of my own broken heart. Yada yada yada.

At the time, I wasn't thinking about any of that. I was just doing something fun.

Kotlc for me is being up at 1 in the morning writing so that I finish the next chapter. It's grinning at AO3 comments and laughing with you crazies. Kotlc is just.... Fun. Kotlc is so much fun.

As much as I can get worked up over the ways I think canon is lacking, stars.

Kotlc means a whole lot to me.

[your--isgayrights]

i Really love your take on kdj's relationship with the kids id love to hear more of your thoughts on them :]

Yessss okay. So like the big thing with SYS is that she's KDJ'S "incarnation," I think that even though she's not like he was as a kid she's the most similar to how he is now if that makes sense. Her relationship to LGY is sort of like KDJ and HSY's friendship where they argue and antagonize one another but are ultimately united by like fundamentally shared interests. So whereas when giving advice to LGY KDJ is often surprised by the outcome or LGY's reaction, with SYS his words will strike a bit more true. Idk if this is TMI or not, but as 3 & 4 explore KDJ'S relationships with his people, chapter 5 gets into his relationships to YJH's people, which will include a SYS moment where you may see what I'm talking about...

I think that the kids are really funny too. I tutored kids in highschool at my local math center and they're sooo funny is the thing, they are just little people lmao. I think that issues I have with people who write kids is that they just ascribe them the personality/role of "kid" and leave it at that. I think that works just fine when they only need two or three lines, but sometimes the caretaker role is important in an adult character's arc and for that to work you NEED TO UNDERSTAND KID PROBLEMS. Things are sooo dramatic and sooo important when you're a kid is the thing. Like half the things that are happening to you are happening for literally the first time ever and that's fucking! Dramatic! Important! Foundational!

This is also very much the influence of me 1. Psychoanalyzing myself and retaining a lot of memories from being a kid myself 2. Studying developmental psych for a while, and 3. Working with kids and babysitting, but like... The thing about kids in particular is that whenever they act in certain ways that is like... Coming from Somewhere, you know? I think ORV does a good job of showing this in how the kids start imitating KDJ'S self-negligence and try to act as grownups. I think sometimes it's hard for grown ups to see how they effect their kids if they don't put a lot of focus into being self-aware, because then they can't recognize what behaviors their kids are copying/responding to in them.

Like I have a little map of SYS's Issues I've put hints at through chapter 3 and want to get into later, but if you take LGY for instance, you see how he's overly formal and business-like at the beginning of things. That's very much him trying to imitate adults and put on the affectation of being an adult. After his parents died, it's hard for him to feel like he's a kid anymore, because he doesn't know any other kids who are going through what he's been through. Therefore he begins to act like he's an adult to normalize being on his own without a supportive guardian.

What KDJ does without realizing it is that he engages with LGY on that level that he projects, respecting his desire to behave like an adult in accepting his "sales commission." At this point LGY isn't ready to be treated like a kid by an adult again, that doesn't feel safe to him. As the bug deal continues, LGY begins to test the boundaries of this "business-like" relationship — bringing titano over, asking if Hyung has any snacks, just sitting on Hyung's couch reading comics after he's done with the bugs for the day — and since KDJ is a pushover this experimentarion leads to the attitude you see in Chapter 3 where he boldly declares to the still overly-polite SYS that Hyung is cool and doesn't care if they make a mess of his house. Without either of them really realizing it, KDJ has made his presence as a responsible adult and his home somewhere where it is safe for LGY to be a kid again. That's what allows him to become friends with SYS, whereas he couldn't connect with his cousins or other kids before, his friendship with SYS is nurtured by this environment where he doesn't have to be an adult, he doesn't feel like he's living in a different world than another kid here. SYS hasn't had the same realization and tries to be polite to every adult, and then, LGY arguing with her is where her childish side gets to show, thus it's an important relationship for her as well.

You can see how SYS's relationship with Yoo Mia is a lot different. In chapter 3 she does a lot to appease YMA, so it may seem like YMA is bossing her around. In reality, this is SYS trying to perform the role of an adult. To escape acknowledging her own mother's negligence, she tries to take on the role of caretaker herself. We see this in the way she looks after her pets and also the way she tries to appease the slightly younger YMA, versus the indelicate way she treats LGY who is closer to her in size and age. Then YMA is obviously imitating her brother, haha...

Oh about my age/height head cannons. I think SYS is the tallest and YMA is the shortest. Then, the way that ages work in South Korea is that all ages switch over in the new year and everyone starts at "1" when they're born. So, in my interpretation, YMA was born closer to before the new year and SYS and LGY were born closer to after the new year (in the same year), so even though they'd all be in the same grade, YMA is actually nearly a year younger. That age difference matters a lot in earlier years, so I think that SYS feels a bit of responsibility to be an older sister to YMA because she knew her from when she first started living with YJH when they were 6 or 7 (I think?) and developed a habit of being overly indulgent and trying to spoil her like she would a kitten.

Vs LGY when they're all about 10 seeing that and just thinking YMA's a bossy know-it-all taking advantage of SYS and making her more lame >:/ conflict!

Lmao yeah I could probably go on but I don't wanna keep ya too long. Thanks for your ask!!

[hops-hunny]

Just a Touch Away

Pairing: Neville Longbottom x Reader

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 4k

Request: Not necessarily?? A few people did ask for this though and who am I to deny you of that?

Summary: Part two of Just a Flight Away

Warnings: Sex, just sex. There’s fluff too, a good lil 50/50.

A/N: The fact that this is longer than the original makes me fucking laugh cause how tf did that even happen?? Hope I didn’t disappoint. I also got lazy half way through editing so only like the first 2k words are edited.

Neville was beyond ecstatic to be walking hand in hand with his girlfriend. It was better than anytime his mind would wander to it during the day and anytime it’d lull him to sleep at night. He looked down at her, watching as her eyes looked at everything in amazement. It reminded him of his first year at Hogwarts, wide eyed and full of curiosity of all there was to be explored. (Y/n) seemed to be soaking it all in as if she took even the smallest of blinks, everything would vanish before her eyes.

“It’s a pretty place, isn’t it?” He started off, catching the girl’s attention. She looked up at the tall lanky Gryffindor smiling at him. God he couldn’t believe that such a doll was his. This was his girlfriend.

“Yeah! It’s amazing! I love how tall the ceilings are and all the intricacies such as the carvings around the walls and floors, the big open windows, it’s all to die for!” She exclaimed, bouncing up and down a bit. How could one girl be so cute? Neville knew that if she asked, he’d do absolutely anything she wanted without a second thought. Anything she wanted and needed he would give to her at the drop of a hat.

“Yeah, that’s not even the most magical part. No matter where you go in the castle, you can find something new almost every time. Be it a hallway, room, whatever.” he stated, smiling as the girl gasped in amazement.

“We have to explore then some time while I’m here! However, today I wanna spend time with you doing you know,” she started, looking away as she was overcome with shyness, “Doing couple things.” Neville felt his heart swell at her words, trying his best not to drown her in all of his affection.

“Of course, petal. We can do whatever you want today! How bout I take you to Honeydukes and then we end the day off with the greenhouse? I know you wanted to see that first but trust me when I say it’s even more of a beauty during the evening than it is at this time.” He said, reaching down to push a bit of her hair out of her face. He laughed some as her eyes lit up at the mention of the sweets shop. When Neville and (Y/n) would send each other things, Neville would send her treats as much as possible. He had learned early on about the girl’s large sweet tooth and second stomach for dessert.

“That sounds amazing! You know how much I love treats!” she said, clapping her hands as she began to jump more. Neville looked at her fondly as he watched her fit of excitement but quickly stopped as he noticed her frown. “I don’t have the right currency to buy things yet though. I still only have dragots. That’s okay, we can j-”

“Did you really think I was going to make you pay, flower? What kind of man would I be to invite you out and not pay? I insist, shop to your heart's content today.” He said, reaching down to stroke her cheek. She leaned into his touch, smiling up at him.

“I love you, Nev.” she mumbled, closing her eyes in content from the warmth that radiated from his hand. Neville felt his breath hitch as he looked down at her, face flushing a bright red. It wasn’t the first time they had said it to each other. Sure, they ended their letters with it more often than not but to hear it from her voice? A voice that was so beautiful, so full of love, aimed towards him? She was making it really hard for him not to just have his way with her right then and there.

“Oh angel, I love you more. Come here.” He pulled her closer, bending down to rest his forehead on hers, smiling as he leaned in to kiss her. The (h/c) haired girl met him halfway, smiling into the kiss as she wrapped her arms around her neck. He continued to kiss her, deepening the kiss before remembering that they were quite literally in the middle of the hallway. He pulled away, placing a quick chaste kiss on her lips. Confusion took over (Y/n)’s face as she looked around them. In different parts of the hallway, a few guys were looking in their direction. “What is it, darling?” he questioned, grabbing her hand as he continued to walk. She simply dismissed his question, offering him a soft smile as he guided her towards the nearest castle exit. That’s when he started to hear it. It wasn’t loud, but it was loud enough for him to hear.

“God she’s a right fitty, isn’t she?”

“Yeah I mean look at the ass on her. She’s one of those Ilvermorny girls.”

“Could’ve fooled me. Looks straight outta Beauxbaton.”

“Longbottom’s a fool, I would’ve had my way with her as soon as she stepped out the train.”

Neville felt his jaw clench, trying to calm himself down. He had to get them out of here before (Y/n) heard, because if she had? Those guys would see exactly why he was put in Gryffindor in the first damn place. “Petal, do you want a piggyback ride? I know you mentioned wanting one in a few of your letters. Come on, hop on.” he said, bending down some so she could get on. (Y/n) felt her eyes light up at the idea. She took a large running start before jumping on the boy’s back, squealing as he lifted her up. Neville secured her on his back, biting his lip at the feeling of her plush thighs filtering between his fingers. They felt heavenly, he couldn’t help but let his thoughts wander to what they’d feel like wrapped around his- they had places to be. He didn’t want his precious girl to hear anything that those twits were saying about her so quickly he took off down the hallway, smiling as the girl laughed, tightening her arms around his neck.

-----------------------------------------

(Y/n) gasped as her eyes zoomed in various places all around Honeydukes. It was unlike anything she had ever seen before. She ran to various different snacks, reading the packages of them. “Look Nev, look! These look sooo good. They’re strawberry flavored! I love strawberry.” she said, holding up the box of snack cakes in his face. Neville laughed at the girl’s enthusiasm for sweets.

“I’ve had those before. They’re quite good! I think you’ll enjoy them ‘specially since you like strawberry so much. Do you wanna get them?” he questioned. (Y/n) pondered, humming slightly before nodding, setting them in his hands. She wondered how he could contain himself, especially when there were so many sweets around! Who wouldn’t wanna buy practically the whole store? 

As they walked around the store, (Y/n) would occasionally find something else that piqued her interest, ask Neville’s opinion on it, and then throw it in his arms. She did this numerous times until she realized how full his arms were. The tower of sweets and treats almost covered his face. However, she couldn’t help to admire how his arms flexed and tensed under his shirt only imagining how nice they’d feel-

“Are you done, petal? It’s okay if you’re not! You can get a few more things, I just wanna get back to the greenhouse before it gets too dark.” he explained, turning to the side so he could see her face.

“Yeah, I’m done! Are you sure this is okay? This is a lot of stuff Nev.” she questioned, biting the inside of her cheek guilty.

“Nonsense! Nothing is too much for you, flower. Let’s get going, I’ve got a few plants that I need to water in about,” he set the treats down on the counter before looking at his watch, “30 minutes. Perhaps you can help me?” 

“I’d love to! You know that’s my favorite part of growing plants is the watering part. It’s almost like you can see them do a little happy dance when you do! Well, some of the more animated plants quite literally do but you get what I mean!” she rambled on, quickly latching onto his arm once more. Neville listened to her, grabbing the bags as they began to walk out of the door only for him to bump into Malfoy himself. Great.

“Ah I see, loneliness has stricken you again huh Longbottom? I don’t know what all those treats will do for that!” He snickered out, high fiving Crabbe and Goyle. Neville rolled his eyes, frankly quite done with the bloke. He didn’t give him that same sense of fear as when he was younger. In fact, now he found him to be quite annoying. 

“Actually they aren’t for him, they’re mainly all for me! Neville’s personal pick is just this little box right here.” she said, holding up the small box before placing it back in the bag. (Y/n) had to stop herself from letting out an audible gag as the blonde’s eyes traveled up and down her frame.

“You must be Neville’s American cousin, right? I-”

“Didn’t ask. Come on babe, let’s go.” The small girl said, dragging her boyfriend along with her. Draco stood there in shock as the two walked off still in amazement in how Neville had such a hot American girlfriend already.

-----------------------------------------------------

“Woah! I’ve read about this plant actually. Even had a small personal one of my own.” The (h/c) haired girl said, positioning the magnifying glass up and down around the leaves to view it better. Neville whipped his head towards her in excitement.

“Really? Wait, had?” he asked, watching as the girl shrugged sheepishly.

“Yeah, turns out it wasn’t really suited for the climate in America. Such a shame though! She was a real beauty.” She said, still not looking up at the plant. Neville smiled at her fondly, walking closer to her as he stood behind her.

“Yeah, she is.” he muttered, wrapping his arms around her waist as he turned her around.

“Something tells me we’re no longer discussing plants.” she joked, wrapping an arm around his neck as she brought the other to stroke his cheek. He leaned down hovering his lips above hers.

“I’m afraid we aren’t.” he closed the gap between them, kissing her with all the anger, all the passion that had built up over the day. He was tired of it, tired of men speaking about her like he wasn’t right fucking there. Obviously that wasn’t his sweet flower’s fault but god was he furious. He took one of his hands, trailing it from her waist to the underside of her skirt. With one hand he flipped it up and with the other he began to grip and prod at one of her cheeks harshly. He trailed his free hand up to her jaw, holding it tightly as he pulled away from the kiss leaving a trail of saliva in its path. “Do you want to-”

“Yes.” she cut him off, taking one of his hands and leading it under her shirt. He moved his large freckled hand up her torso until he reached her breast. His eyes widened as he felt the lack of bra.

“You little minx.” he sneered, gripping her ass in both of his hands as he sat her on top of the working table. He pushed her shirt above her breast, watching as her nipples began to harden from the cool air. Neville got on his knees pulling the girl to the edge of the table. He couldn’t help but pause and admire how beautiful she was. The setting sun reflected off of her sweaty (s/c) skin making it appear as if she was glowing. The shadows and light hit the parts of her soaking panties, revealing just how wet her cunny was. Neville let out an audible groan at the sight, adjusting his tightening pants. “God you’re bloody gorgeous. Look at you baby, all soaked just for me?” He ran a finger over her cloth covered slick, smirking as the girl jumped a bit letting out a soft whimper. “Let me treat you, yeah?” he whispered against her clothed cunt before ripping her panties down and stuffing them in her back pocket (He certainly was not giving those back). 

His eyes were glued to the sight in front of him. It was more beautiful than any photograph that she had sent. No matter how many times she had written to him about how wet she was, nothing could prepare him for the true extent to what it was. The entirety of her pussy was covered in slick, running down her folds and now onto the table. He watched as her pretty little hole clenched and unclenched around nothing practically begging to be filled. But he couldn’t just yet, he had to do what he had been dreaming of for years. He moved a steady hand forward rubbing her clit in circular motions before licking a fat strip across her slit as he began to suck on her clit. (Y/n) gasped, bringing a shaky hand down to his head pushing him in forward and, who was Neville to deny her? Sure, Neville lacked experience severely. They both did. But he’d be damned if he came up from between her legs without giving her an orgasm first.

Neville took his middle finger, gathering a bit of her juices on it before slowly sinking it inside of her. He began to pump it in and out, making sure to be gentle and slow while maintaining a steady pace. (Y/n) threw her head back, letting out a cross between a whimper and a moan. It wasn’t like she hadn’t pleasured herself before, she had...numerous times. Sometimes even multiple times a day. But god his fingers? They were so much thicker than hers, so much longer touching and hitting spots she didn’t know were possible. “A-another please.” she whimpered, bucking her hips onto his face. Neville looked up at her, humming around her clit in agreement before he slid in another digit into her tight hole. He felt his dick strain against his pants more at the sound of her moans but he could ignore it. This wasn’t about him right now, it was all about him pleasuring his perfect girl.

“Do you like that, pretty? Hm? Like when I get my fingers covered in you.” He muttered against her, groaning as she clenched around his fingers. He drove them deeper keeping with his slow pace. Neville didn’t want to rush this, he wanted to appreciate the girl who he loved, the girl who kept him up late into the night as he stroked one out. He knew they would share many intimate moments in the months to come but he definitely wanted their first to be the most memorable.

 He continued to lick and suck on her bud, pulling away every so often to lick at the stray juices that ran down her folds. “Just one more, pretty. I’ve gotta make sure you’re nice and stretched out for me.” she nodded lazily at his words, feeling herself growing closer and closer by the second. (Y/n) was in such a state of euphoria, never wanting it to end. She let out another strangled moan as Neville slid in a third finger, scissoring them a bit before beginning to make a come hither motion within her. The tips of his fingers rubbed against her spot sending her into a fit of nonsense phrases and words, the most recognizable of them being “please, please. Yes, yes, yes!” which only encouraged him further. With more force he repeatedly began to jab at her g-spot growling as the girl came apart above him. (Y/n) gasped, falling back onto the table as her body grew tense, releasing all over Neville fingers. She continued to moan as her arousal slipped past his fingers running down the table as the boy fingered her through her high. Neville pulled his fingers out, stretching them apart as he stared at the arousal that was connected between the spaces. He stuck his fingers in his mouth, letting out a soft moan at her taste. Just as sweet as he had pictured it. 

After a few moments of heavy panting, (Y/n) felt a bit better and decided to sit up. Her (e/c) eyes trailed down her lover’s body as they reached the bulge in his pants. ‘If it’s that big through his pants, I don’t even want to imagine how big it is out of them!’ she found herself thinking. No wonder he had used three fingers, she wasn’t even sure that that was enough. She reached both her hands out, beginning to unfasten his belt pulling down his pants before freeing his member. She held back a gasp as she watched it slap up against his lower abdomen. Neville’s cock was a shade darker than him, it had no curve to it but it didn’t matter. He made up for a lack of curve with the sheer girth of his cock alongside the length (which was most definitely half of her forearm, if not more). She took a deep breath before hopping off of the table and kneeling before him.

“What’re you doing, love?” he asked, reaching a hand down to stroke her cheek.

“Returning the favor?” she replied as she reached a hand forward to grasp him. She looked at him confused as he lifted her back up, setting her back on top of the table.

“You can do that some other time. Right now is about pleasuring you.” he said, moving his lips to her neck as he began to suck and kiss along it leaving a trail of marks in its wake.

“A-are you sure? What about you? I’d feel bad that I’m not pleasing you in return.” a soft frown took over her face. Neville grabbed her face softly, tilting it towards his own.

“Oh darling, taking care of you brings me a greater pleasure than anything you could give me. Tonight is about you so let me just take care of you, yeah?” he asked, looking into her eyes full of love and a deep amount of arousal. She sat there unsure before nodding, leaning up to capture his lips. Neville returned the kiss, trailing the hand that was against her face to wrap gently around her neck. He pulled away, tugging her lip with him. “I’m gonna put it in now. Are you ready?” he asked, lubing himself up with the reminisce of her first orgasm.

“Please be gentle.” she whispered, hiding her face in his neck as he pushed his tip against her entrance.

“‘Course love. I’ll do my best.” he placed a kiss on the top of her head before beginning to sink into her. He let out a hiss at the tight heat of her velvety walls. When he was in enough, he brought both his hands up to embrace her, whispering soft phrases of encouragement as he slid into her tight hole. He couldn’t help but feel guilty at the sound of her whimpers and cries, feeling awful that he was the cause of it.  After what felt like ages, his pelvic region finally met with her mound. He pulled back gazing at the sight as he let out a soft moan.

“Y-you can move now. Feels good.” she stuttered out, gasping as he pulled out some. Neville thrusted into her deeply to test the waters, watching her facial expressions. He felt himself grow relieved when he saw how deep in pleasure she was. Her eyes were clenched shut, chest rising and falling quickly. He took that as a sign to continue, thrusting into her deep and slow. He gripped her hips tightly, deepening the intensity of his thrusts. The boy was absolutely enamored. How could she be so cute in such a filthy state? Tongue lulled out the side of her mouth, hair tousled messily as sweat covered her delicate skin. Seeing her in such bliss only fueled his need to please her, to see her come undone beneath him. He continued to pound into her, every thrust filled with passion. 

“You’re so fucking pretty, angel,” he growled out leaning down to capture her breast in his mouth. He swirled his tongue around her nipple, nibbling softly before pulling away and doing the same to the other one. (Y/n) continued to let out a string of moans, tightening her grip on the Gryffindor's back. She couldn’t help but dig her fingers into the flesh of his back, trying to ground herself as her lower region received immense amounts of pleasure. She let out a cry of gratification as he began to rub at her clit with circular motions, digging her heels into his lower back. “God just look at you. You feel so fucking good wrapped around my cock. Who’s making you feel this good?”

“Y-you Nev! S-so good. It’s so deep, so big.” she whimpered as she began to feel hot tears form in her eyes. “Love you so much, I love you!” she sobbed, resting her head on her chest. It was all too much, too good for her to handle. Neville cooed at her adoringly continuing to thrust into her. “C-close….”

“Hold it for just one second of love. Let’s cum together.” He grunted. After a few moments, he felt a familiar pit in his stomach signaling his release. His thrust began to grow sloppy, hips stuttering but as he went to pull out, the girl stopped him.

“Please don’t. I’m on birth control. Want you to cum inside of me, want you to fill me up.” Neville gripped at her hips harder, pistoning them with an animalistic amount of pace. The moans of them both echoed off the greenhouse walls as they both released, collapsing against one another. (Y/n) shuddered, whimpering at the feeling of his thick seed spilling inside of her. It seemed nonstop, pouring and pouring deeper inside of her, dribbling out past him and onto the table.

Neville let out a breathless chuckle at the sight, feeling a sense of pride at the fact that it was his seed dripping out of her. No one else. Not Malfoy, not his idiot friends, and certainly not those morons from in the hallway earlier. He stroked her skin gentle, watching as she shuddered at his touch. “Sorry love, it seems I left quite the mark on your neck.” he mumbled, brushing his fingertips along the healing mark he had left. It was a big purple hickey, the same shade as the bruises on her hips.

“S’okay. I’ll have something that reminds me of you. I think I accidentally gave you one too when I came. I couldn’t help myself.” Neville viewed his reflection in the small hanging mirror across the room. Moving his long shaggy hair to the side, he saw a small reddish bruise, the indent from her teeth still visible. 

“It’s a shame that I didn’t get to show you the rest of the plants you wanted.” he frowned. He had totally forgotten that was the entire reason they had come to the greenhouse today. Neville wanted his girl’s first day at Hogwarts to be absolutely perfect in every way and he had ruined it in his own fit of selfish greed.

“Are you kidding me?” she asked, sitting up. She winced slightly but continued on. “This was way better than any sort of plant! Nothing says ‘welcome to Hogwarts’ like what we just had.” Neville let out a breath that he wasn’t even aware he had been holding.

Even though this was the first day of them meeting in person, he knew this was the girl for him. As the sun set and they both held each other in their arms, the pair couldn’t help but wonder what was in store for them. What adventures lie ahead? Only time could tell. But luckily they didn’t have to spend another minute apart. (Y/n) was no longer just a flight away, but a mere inches apart.

[tendousthoughts]

HQ Boys Calling Their S/O Clingy Pt. 3

Character(s) included: Sakusa & Oikawa

Warnings: Cursing, fainting, and mention of blood

A/N: Uh wow thank you- I’ve decided to make a pt. 3! Unlike part one and part two it will all be in one day! Idk I was seeing it become kinda repetitive so I’ve decided to change it up a bit! If you want any other hq boy go ahead and request! Please read the rules first though thank you! Ignore my terrible spelling and grammar. Reblogs/follows/likes are all greatly appreciated!

Song of the day: Cloud 9 by Beach bunny

Where to find all my content!

Where to find all the parts!

Credit: @/teesumu

Sakusa

This was Sakusa's chance to show his family members and old team how much he had grown. He was kinda worried and you could tell. You made your over softly resting a kiss on his nose.

“You’ll be great bab-” he cuts you off.

“Y/n, can you let me practice in peace?” He bit his lip before returning to practicing.

“Oh ya.. so-” he turns to you.

“Do you know what let me practice in peace means? Or are you so fucking clingy, that you need me to tell you to get the fuck away from me? This is my shot to show them how much I have improved and I don’t need a pestaround to fuck it up!” He shouts, everyone on the team can hear him scold you for no reason. Looking around their eyes are full of disgust towards Sakusa. Your eyes feel watery as you head to the bleachers to grab your stuff. Atsumu runs up to you.

“Hey y/n.. um can you stay for me? My brother is coming and I don’t want to let my team down and um..” he wasn’t sure what to say. You bit your lip before hugging him tightly.

“Hey, you're going to do great okay? No need to worry about screwing up anything, you're on the MSBY for god sake..” you whisper softly into his ear.

“Thanks.. but can you please stay..? You can leave afterward but just for the game if you don’t mind..?” He looked desperate to be honest, he was annoyed how Sakusa had treated you and felt like you deserved better.

“I guess.. imma head to the vending machine for now, you want anything?” You let go of him. Sakusa is watching you two and you don’t spare him a glance.

“Um... can you get me anything? Your favorite snack?” He smiled softly and your thoughts of what Sakusa had said to you melted off and you giggled a bit.

“Ya I’ll go grab it,” you grab some cash. Atsumu ran off, and just to grab some money before.

“Here for my stuff,” he smiled trying to hand it to you.

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll pay it isn’t that costly and you made my day sooo,” he chuckles softly before giving you a soft thumbs up and you start to walk to the vending machine.

“Hey Atsumu back off,” Sakusa mumbled.

“What?” Atsumu looked over. “I’m sorry that you're going against past teammates and family like the rest of us. I’m sorry that y/n was trying to comfort you yet you pushed them off, I mean them just trying to help is annoying to you. God. I mean I wish I had someone who cared about me like how y/n cares about you. I hope you know there are many people who would have left you if you did that to them, and frankly I don’t understand why they are still with you assuming that you have done that before.” He bit his lip. By the time his rant was over you were back, the vending machine not too far away you heard everything.

You waited a minute before walking back. “Hey I got the snack, sorry if you don’t like it” you smile before handing him the snack.

“I’m pretty sure I’ll like it but don’t worry about it.” He chuckles, Sakusa giving him a death glare.

“Okay well good luck! You’ll do amazing so don’t worry about it, I’ll be watching,” you go and sit on the bleachers. Using your phone until the match begins.

Unsurprisingly they won. Whenever Atsumu made a good set or a good setter dump you cheered and gave him smiles. Sakusa on the other hand it was almost as if he was invincible. You didn’t wanna be“clingy” and “a pest”. Every so often you could see Sakusa's eyes land on you trying to see if you noticed his amazing talent. Of course you did, of course you were proud. Why wouldn’t you be? But his words still hurt and you couldn’t give him the ability to talk to you like that you couldn’t give him the ability to think it was okay to talk to you like that.

You ran up to Atsumu “see I told you! Nothing to be afraid of,” you giggle a bit smiling. Sakusa was talking to his cousin explaining what happened, feeling terrible.

“Thank you y/n,” he chuckles and talks for like twenty minutes. “My brother said he will pay for lunch, you wanna come?” You glance over to Sakusa, before accepting.

“Ya sure,” you smile as all of you head to the bus. You sit next to Atsumu and Osamu the whole time ignoring Sakusa.

After lunch everyone said their goodbyes and you made sure to have both Atsumu’s and Osamu’s number saved. When you guys got back to the apartment you began to work.

“Y.. y/n?” You look over at the sound of your name.

“Yes?” You didn’t have the gut to be mean to him using a calming voice.

“Um.. Can we-” you cut him off.

“Sakusa I don’t wanna speak to you at the moment, okay? Can I have some space please.” You mumbled typing away on your computer.

“Sorry but I wanna-” you cut him off once again.

“I said I need space. I don’t need you to be clingy right now.” You mumbled as you type.

He waited behind you on the bed sniffling softly as tears brimmed his eyes. “You're not going to leave me right.. I’m sorry I didn’t mean too..” he sniffed again. “I’m really sorry y/n.. your the best thing that ever happened please don’t leave me.” You turned around annoyed that he kept bugging you but as you saw the tears you got up going onto the bed.

You hug him softly as he holds on to you tightly crying softly. You lay down next to him as you hold each other. Sakusa hides his head in your chest as he cries a bit. You rubbed his back softly as tears fell from his eyes. “Hey baby.. it is going to be okay I got you... I’m not going anywhere I promise. We aren’t breaking up or anything okay?”

He slightly shakes his head, “I’m sorry...” he mumbles.

“I know.. please don’t do it again you embarrassed me in front of everyone... I was just trying to help,” you whisper.

“I won’t..” he closed his eyes.

“You did amazing by the way baby..” you mumble knowing how Sakusa is. You know the fact you didn’t say or do anything with him afterwards is eating him up.

“You were watching..?” You know he is smiling by the sound of his voice.

“Of course babe.. I told you, you had nothing to worry about.. you were amazing,” you smile as he relaxes a bit letting go of the tight hold and just enjoys you hugging him.

“Thank you...” he mumbles falling asleep. “I love you y/n...”

He falls asleep before you can respond but you still whisper, “goodnight my love..”

Oikawa

“What the hell was that?” Oikawa shouted from the room away.

“Nothing!” You tried to sweep up the glass quickly with your hands.

“What the fuck are you doing!” He pushed your hands away grabbing the broom, “can you stop making messes please?”

“I didn’t mean to, I just knew that you needed to do a few things and I thought I could help.. like I finished the dishes.. other than this one. I also watered the plants and did the laundry..” you try to smile, your hands slightly bleeding.

“Well can you stop? I understand your clingy and you want me to be with you every fucking moment of the day,” he looked at you angrily. “But this just makes so much more fucking work for me!”

“I didn’t mean too..” you whisper.

“Of course you didn’t! I mean why would you? Your sooo amazing and the whole world needs to forgive every fucking mistake you do because, ‘I didn’t mean too’!” He looks at you. “I mean seriously can you be any more of a fuck up?”

“What..?” You whisper as tears roll down your face.

“You clingy shit, can you be more of a fuck up? I mean seriously you messed up my work earlier because you wanted to ‘help organize it’ and you broke the glass, and you wouldn’t leave me alone all fucking day! Tōru this and Tōru that! I mean seriously, why the fuck am I dating you?” Everything was going blank for you as tears rolled down your face.

“Please stop..” you whisper.

“What? Telling you the fucking truth?” Oikawa looked at you now noticing how pale you were looking.

“I’m sorry.. I’m sorry.. I..I’m sor-” you kept whispering as everything went blank.

When you woke up Oikawa was holding you tight. “Shit y/n.. I’m sorry.” He mumbled holding you tight tears rolling down his face.

“What..?” You were looking around trying to get a hold of your surroundings.

“Please don’t leave me.. I was really stressed about everything and I didn’t mean to take it out on you.. I know you just wanted to hang out and I was being a dick.. please I’m sorry..” he hugs on tight.

“I..it is okay babe, I know you didn’t mean too.. but please don’t do it again..?” You tear up, “I was just trying to help because I knew you were stressed and I thought it might help. Clearly it didn’t and I won’t do anything without your permission again but please next time don’t yell..”

“Of course.. and you were doing any bad it was my fault you were being really helpful.. I should have appreciated it and not yelled..” he whispers. “I mean seriously I was being an ass.. you were just trying to be nice to me and then I had to come in and fuck it up. Your so fucking amazing and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have called you those names or even mention you being clingy. I know you hate when you're called that.. and I should have stopped.. I shouldn’t have even done it in the first place. Your my fucking everything and I fucked that up...”

“It is okay.. you can do your work now I’m just a bit tired so I’m going to sleep.” You kiss his head.

“No i wanna sleep with you right now..” he whined softly.

“Okay.. I love you Tōru..” you mumble closing your eyes.

“I love you too.. y/n” he whispers in your ear before closing his own eyes.

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