#look i wrote something new
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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Spy School Series - Stuart Gibbs Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Erica Hale/Benjamin Ripley (Spy School) Characters: Erica Hale (Spy School), Benjamin Ripley (Spy School) Additional Tags: Autistic Erica Hale, Character Study, Fluff, Introspection, also i'm lowkey salty about the academy's teaching techniques, especially if the descrepencies between books are all canon simultaneously, Title from a Taylor Swift Song Summary:
Ben had no idea what Erica was thinking about, but he was thinking about how Zoe seemed insistent that for all Erica was a good spy, she wasn’t nice. He wished there was a way he could bottle up moments like this and show them to her.
OR
Sometimes moments are good and nice.
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thinking about the relationship between sif and the universe, and related theories / headcanons aka I listened to a song and I need to get these feefees out of me
this is a lot of prelude for something that can be shown with just the video clip, but I want to include all the strings that make up this knot
Its not explicitly stated, but I believe it's pretty clear that whenever sif repeats something three times while hoping for something (sharpening the keyknife, carving in general, praying to the change god statue in dormont), he is performing wish craft.
however, he doesnt repeat anything three times when getting the keyknife. he doesnt even need to pray to get it at all, the change god just gives it to him. they say themselves that they dont care for rituals. they never even take credit for the stat buff, they only take credit for the keyknife
when sif changes how they pray at the change god statue, their method more strongly resembles the ritual to make a wish at the favor tree (picking the one you like best), and as a result the buff gets better. it is the wish craft ritual that is the important part of the prayer to that statue, not the change god
one thing that IS explicitly stated is just how powerful wish craft is for those who know the rituals, and how dangerous it is in the wrong hands. between the disappearance of colors (Im pretty sure that was the result of a wish, I may be misremembering), the disappearance of the country, and the king being nearly successful in freezing all of vaugarde in time, it only takes one wish to take out massive chunks of the world at a time
we know that wish craft is very entwined in the culture of the country (the story written about in the journal is told as a cautionary fairy tale, the rituals themselves are so deeply ingrained in sif that the wish to forget the country did not restrict his memory of the rituals, and he can perform wish craft without even being fully aware he is doing it)
it seems reasonable to me that the reason for the country's disappearance was to hide the existence of wish craft and the rituals to access that power from the rest of the world. considering sif didnt even remember his culture AND had good intentions, and still nearly ended the world, seems like that concern is pretty well founded. however, thats not the important theory Im making this post about
the country has knowledge of wish craft in conjunction with worship of the universe. "the universe leads, we can only follow," "the universe willed it," seems pretty safe to say that sif's Universe is the "entity" that is granting wishes
the way wishes are described, they dont seem like something the universe grants based on who worships it. as long as you know the ritual, you get the wish. everyone is part of the universe, after all, worshiper or not
Admittedly, its a bit of a stretch to say that the universe as a collective force has any sense of empathy for human struggles. but using the change god as an example, as spiteful as they are to sif, and unsympathetic to anything other than a human's role in the concept of change, they still show a great deal of care and favor to mira, someone who loves them. it is possible for a deity to care for those that care about it
sif, despite no longer having access to his culture or why he cares about the universe, still loves the universe, very very deeply, just as much as mira loves change. the change god says that sif's deity will never answer him, but I dont think thats the case
and this is the important headcanon that I am making this post for
sif is performing the rituals, so he gets the wishes, simple as. but I feel strongly that his wishes getting granted in very small but noticeable ways, despite not knowing how or why hes doing it, is the presence of his universe helping him, caring for him, even when he doesnt remember it
the strongest evidence for this, and the basis for this whole thing, is exactly how euphrasie breaks down in act 5
at first I only really noticed when she laughs, it reminded me very much of how the change god, a being who uses sprites of other characters and has done a whole possession, laughed during their encounter. they and euphrasie are the only two that use anything other than "ha," and right after this laugh is when her breakdown pauses and she says the lines
"... Soon you'll be able to go back to your normal lives. Away from battle and strife. Finally, you'll all be able to go home!!!"
which, knowing the end of the game is coming, is incredibly relevant. very deliberate
before this pause, her breakdown seems pretty chaotic. the characters and the player are just coming out of one harrowing experience, and are clearly headed for another. the cohesiveness of this glitchy breakdown amongst a mess of the rest of the world doing the same isnt really high up on the list of priorities. none of the characters notice anything beyond the fact that reality is breaking, not even sif. it just sounds like scary nonsense.
but with the context of euphrasie being possessed to talk to sif, every single one of her lines makes perfect sense
(footage from Zhain Gaming on yt)
the universe is there its talking directly to him, it was there the whole time
the Universe loves Sif so much
#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#isat act 5 spoilers#I have no idea how obvious this is or if its old news#since I havent seen anyone else talk about it#but the relationship between sif and the universe makes me emotional#I wrote this at 3 am based on memory#at first I wasnt too confident in it since it was only based on the laugh and the lines that follow it#this was just something that made me happy that I was gonna keep no matter what#but when I went back to look at the lines and found that every one lined up‚ I cried#anyway#I wanted to write this whole thing after listening to Secret For The Mad by Dodie under the lens of the universe talking to siffrin#special shoutout to pidgey who joked that the universe was adrienne actually#they were goofing but as a high concept meta art thing I can definitely appreciate#speaks
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What's so fun about BruJay as a ship is Jason's sheer obsessive devotion to Bruce. Jason is possessive over Bruce, to the point he doesn't care about the deaths of others so long as he has Bruce's attention. A part of the UTRH arc this isn't talked about enough is that Bludhaven fucking explodes mid-way and Jason won't let Bruce see if Dick is alive.
batman (1940) #650
A lot of discussion about UTRH paints Jason as this anger-driven cold, calculating machine up against Bruce when it's so clear that his love for Bruce is what drives him at his root, even if he won't acknowledge it. He says it himself, he would've done anything if it was Bruce who'd died instead of him and his anger is rooted in that possessive devotion not being reciprocated.
batman (194) #650
BruJay as a ship always to be, to some level, unrequited. Even if Bruce loves Jason back in that way, he'll never be that obsessed with Jason. Jason will always view Bruce's love for Dick or Tim to be a distraction, proof that Bruce isn't dedicated enough to him. Jason has the need to always have Bruce's attention, even when it could come at the cost of Bruce's other loved ones. Something something cannibalism as a metaphor for love in how Jason wants to consume Bruce's whole existence. He can't let Bruce leave him again, can't let Bruce love or grieve anyone else. Forcing Bruce to choose between Jason and the Joker isn't just about confronting Jason's killer, it's about confronting the other person who exists as this duality with Bruce and consumes so much of Bruce's life. That's the role Jason wants to fill, calling himself Red Hood and forcing Bruce to look at what he's become. But still loving Bruce and wanting more than anything for Bruce to reciprocate that love in the way that Jason understands. I just think it's good soup and rife with Dynamics that are underexplored with them.
#necrotic festerings#brujay#jaybruce#jaybru#jason todd x bruce wayne#batcest#i've had this thought in my head for a while#i was just weirdly shy about posting it? like convinced myself it's not as verbose as some of my other thoughts#also GOD why is the art of this arc SO BAD.#i can't take it SERIOUSLY#i hate looking at it.#the faces. why are the faces like that.#brujay needs more love bc jesus#gotham war had some good brujay content but i am still too bitter to discuss that shitshow. so. ignoring it for now.#bruce changing jason's brain chemistry as an act of love is the most FUCKED UP brujay thing ever tho#it's so Them.#sorry that is just peak brujay. they are incapable of meeting in any middle and always trying to change each other.#maybe this meta should've been about that.#but then i'd have to use new-52 and rebirth panels so eh. nvmd.#this page makes it seem like i hate post-flashpoint comics. i don't i swear#they just interest me less for batcest.#like oh yay everyone's getting along and working together.#it only came at the expense of throwing away decades of character work. small sacrifice.#i need to stop posting meta at fucking 5 am.#no one is going to see this bc i can't be a normal person.#wrote this while watching invincible#which is pretty good so far but man the ending of ep1 clocked me. i was absolutely bamboozled.#i had something else i was going to say in the tags but i lost it.#anyway most of this is a ship post and projecting shit as per usual and yk. not serious comic media.#i'm just silly and gay.
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ok so there's murder time trio where theyre best buddies and get along and sometimes even having more than just platonic interactions. and then there's also the murder time trio where they genuinely just don't like each other and avoid each other and do NOT get along and to me there's just a VERY clear timeline of events that could connect these two group dynamics. like these 2 could coexist,,,,,,
nightmare's fresh outta his little corruption sequence and he needs his henchmen. goes out and gathers the obvious three killer horror and dust (does it really matter how he got them??? kidnapping or not the trio will warm up to him). its his first time having to deal with mentally unstable grown up mortal men and he really has no idea how to manage the team so he lets them have some slack. spoils em a bit yk yk stops fights allows them to hang out allows em to screw around the castle even COMFORTS them,,,, shocking i know (a slightly nice nightmare interpretation from triglycercule? UNFATHOMABLE!!!!)
this killer's fresh outta something new so he's still kinda curious and nosy. he hasnt seen the multiverse and especially not interacted with nightmare/horrordust so he's kinda more outgoing and friendly (ish. to get to know better everyone and satisfy the curiosity of seeing what reactions and feelings these fellas could give him.) bc killer's not that much of a prick and horror and dust would naturally SLIGHTLY get along (and if in the right environment be good buddies. which is nm's lenience and killer's not shittiness) the mtt actually get along pretty well and are good buds!! like the first group dynamic i mentioned where the bad sanses are just kinda like a friend group except they have some weird work relations
and then a fight breaks out and nightmare kills either dust or horror (what about??? anything!) likely dust first because he's more likely to be wary of nm (if kidnapped) and also because he's just kinda more actively righteous compared to horror (who likely wouldn't do much against nm) or killer (does not give a shit.) dust dies, horror likely dies defending dust and that just leaves the og killer and nightmare
nightmare is like "oh shit i just killed my workers". he'll take like a week to ponder what he did and then completely move on (because hes an ass like that.) nightmare gets another horror and dust to replace the ones he killed. and killer is just like wtf how do i deal with this. the guys i were kinda friends were are dead but their copies are right here. like he knew copies existed in the utmv but he didn't think nightmare was so willing to replace them so fast???
this killer's still adapting to the multiverse and stuff (it probably hasn't even been a year since he got snatched up!!!) and yeah hes aware that copies exist and he could get replaced by one but he didn't think that it would LITERALLY HAPPEN RIGHT BEFORE HIS EYES. so he decides to stick more around nm and avoid getting replaced like the og dust and horror because it really just hammers in the point that he's kinda useless if he speaks out like those 2. hes avoidant of the new replacements as well bc hes still new to this experience and is getting used to the whole implications of two guys that were once him and he was friends with died and got replaced by basically the same person
but they still have to work together for obvious reasons. and even if killer's avoiding horror and dust they probably aren't avoiding each other and probably are like wary friends/acquaintances. and naturally killer HAS to become okay worker buddy pals with them because hes stuck living with them. nightmare's a lot stricter and cold to avoid something like dust's rebellion against him happening again. mtt are wary of each other (mostly towards killer. horrordust are pals and killer's kinda growing more apathetic to the duo because he's already experienced a lot of the stuff before with the og two that died.) but theyre still "friends" you could say
and then perchance maybe horror and dust decide to let killer in on a lil secret theyve been cooking up. theyre planning to escape (kidnapped DUH. and nm isn't as nice as he was to og horrordust to warrent them to wanna stay) and even though they don't really trust killer theyre still letting him in on the plan and offer for him to come with them because they lowkey feel bad for him and he's really not all that bad under all the bullshit
but killer saw what happened to the og dust and horror so he says no. and the night that the duo are planning to escape he just has this overwhelming sense of dread. the next morning he wakes up to nightmare standing over his bed with a cold glare telling him of horror and dust's attempted escape and death and killer just kinda. sighs. his dread was right (he was lowkey hoping that they could escape so they didn't die like the original 2)
and then the cycle repeats. previous dust or horror or both die to nightmare or some random outside force or escape (because it has to happen eventually right??) and the pair keep getting replaced. killer keeps witnessing their deaths and replacements and at this point he's just so used to it that he doesn't even TRY to interact with the new horrors and dusts. theyre not even like real people that are getting killed and replaced like robots to him anymore they're just distant coworkers that get fired and then a new one comes to take up the position
each new dust or horror is icked out by nightmare and killer. nightmare is incredibly cold and intimidating and dictatorial and just sucks in general. and killer gives them this distant look. like he knows something they dont. he's already proven to them that he knows that they should obey nightmare and how to deal with the king and they know he's been here longer than them but even when he's not with nightmare or not talking about him they get the blank stare
sometimes when a nicer replacement of horror decides to do something nice for killer like make him a meal he just gives him that look and declines (there's already been countless different horrors that tried doing nice stuff for him. it's not new and nice in his eyes anymore.) maybe when a dust replacement gets irked by killer's apathy and decides to try and say something that'll bother him or snoop through his personal stuff killer will just walk away or kick him out of his room with that creepy ass blank stare again (it's not the first time a dust has tried to rile him up. it's not new or interesting and just predictable)
killer just doesn't CARE about the new horrors and dusts. they're all pretty much the same two guy except maybe a bit nicer or meaner or quieter or even taller or something?? all he really cares about is is serving nightmares atp, no other outside relationships. and ngl he doesn't even care that much about nightmare either. he's already figured out his thinking he's already figured out all of his likes and dislikes and what not to do to piss him off. the only reason he's still dealing with him is because he doesn't have anything else better to do and he doesn't wanna be useless to the one guy that he's served all this time
he's just kinda stuck in an empty boring limbo that killer's only maintaining due to a lack of motivation and any other priorities. and personally i just think this bad sans dynamic is lowkey tragic because like killer keeps witnessing all these guys that he used to be friends or enemies or rivals or whatever with and they just keep dying or leaving him behind. not one ever stays for THAT long (because no wayyyy a dust or horror would take being under a cruel nightmare well) and it's given him this idea that none of these people matter (aside from the important one which is nm) because they're just gonna leave me and the connections ill have formed with them will be for nothing so why even try being vulnerable and friendly and interacting with these cheap copies of the guys i USED to be friends with
#nobody asked for this but i wanted to think of this#i don't know why i always have this idea that just because nobody asked for it doesn't mean nobody wants it. I WANTED TO WRITE THIS!!!!!#see this would work better if it were a fanfic and not a cheap tumblr post about this vague idea#i just wrote this because i really like the image of a blank eyed knowing looking killer#like he KNOWS something about dust and horror that they don't. and it bothers them severely#WHAT DOES HE KNOW??? their death or leaving is what#you ever think that killer has this crazy good sense of being able to predict the future#like he's just gotten so used to things that he just knows their next move#he would be crazy good at reading people and figuring out their behaviors#psycho analyze these guys until he could ACT like them. because what else does he have better to do when so bored and apathetic :3#this (may or may not be) is inspired by a song. i was imagining a dust and horror who kept trying to leave nm and failing miserably#and each time killer would tell their story of how they died or how the previous 2 died#he's like a little time capsule. he stores the experiences and memories of each copy of horror and dust to never tell anyone#because who else would be hell??? the MIRROR??? NIGHTMARE??? lmao no#would this make killer much older than the horrors and dusts that get replaced. maybe i think that would be cool#he lies about how old he is to the other two because if he didn't then they would act differently and not like how he predicts#and anything new and unexpected is kinda scary to killer#ok i think that's enough elaborating in tags. time to actually TAG#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#murder time trio#nightmare sans#bad sanses#bad sans gang#nightmare's gang#what tricule tag category does this go in hmmmm hmmmm#this COULD be a hc and BOTH an analysis. but which one...............#i guess analysis because there's not really anything outrageously ooc in this one#tricule analyze
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One thing that really gets my goat about how Sakura is written is that she does occasionally start to do something, but the narrative shuts her down. Like this:
Sakura goes to leap into the arena to see Lee after his fight with Gaara. Kakashi shuts her down. Contrast this to the panels that immediately follow this one:
Naruto does the exact same thing and no one bats an eye!
It’s not that I think characters shouldn’t be stopped from doing what they want— it’s just that when it’s a consistent pattern it makes reading about the character really frustrating. When Haku traps Sasuke in his mirror prison thing, Sakura hurls a kunai to help… and Kakashi tells her to guard Tazuna. She does this obediently for the rest of the fight, INCLUDING when she literally thinks Sasuke is dead (Tazuna has to offer to go to Sasuke with her to get her to move). Sakura’s willingness to do this is actually an interesting character trait, but because it’s couched in this weird lack of agency, it makes her seem complacent and cowardly, especially when the take away of a lot of fights seems to be “try no matter what.”
Here’s another example: in the first part of the chunin exam, they’re all told they can pick to answer a final question and risk being banned from promotion, OR they can back out now and take the exam again later. If Sakura were alone, she’d take the question because she’s confident in her abilities.
However, she starts to raise her hand to back out because she wants to protect Naruto.
She backs off when Naruto gives a speech about never giving up, even though her making them all back out is arguably the more mature choice (why would you drag a teammate along on a mission you know they’ll fail?). She also tries to pull them out of the prelim tournament because Sasuke needs urgent medical attention, and he shuts her down AGAIN. Like, looking at this with the wisdom of an adult, Sakura was definitely in the right there.
To be clear, I don’t mind Sakura being a cautious killjoy to Naruto’s “Believe it!” Shonen protag energy. It’s just that whenever she tries to exercise that caution, it gets shut down and that makes it seem like a negative trait to have. (Also: contrast this to Shikamaru being REWARDED for exercising caution and knowing when to back out). I’m not even arguing that the scenes I cited need to be changed, because they do character work for Naruto and Sasuke. I’m just saying that Sakura could have gotten a few more scenes where her choices were plot relevant, and she’d be a more fleshed out character.
#nardo reread#she does get two fights but they’re not consequential to the plot#although interestingly she lies to Naruto about what happens with the oto trio#he asks why her hair is shorter and she says she just felt like a new look#and then later there’s a flashback where Sasuke tells her not to tell Naruto about the curse mark so she doesn’t#if only any of Sakura’s decisions (here— lying) had consequences!#wouldn’t that be fun!!#anyway I wrote this up bc I think this is one of the big flaws I. how kishimoto writes her#and I feel like a lot of people think she’d be ‘fixed’ by giving her a battle axe or something but no!!#just let her actions have consequences!!!
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mtdd week day 3 - caring
yeah this is a totally random timeskip thing. just pretend dedede looks older okay thank you
just another night (and it’s ours)
part 2
#mtddweek2023#two parts because i am once again proving i cannot keep things short#and that’s not an exaggeration because i only wound up illustrating about 2/3 of what i wrote#the rest of it didn’t really add anything and i can only draw so much#meta is really tired here lol#i mean they both are#i really cannot draw backgrounds#kirbyposting#my art or something#meta knight#king dedede#metadede#quinn does comics#for the record im not committing to this idea i dont rlly know why i chose this#it exists in a vacuum there are approximately 0 ideas surrounding it aside from#meta’s new look which was for something else set in the future i may or may not get to#what’s with the egg? uhh you decide tbh i just wanted an excuse to write dedede angst
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Wrote a scene for PPAU in which Megatron convinces the DJD to accept a peace treaty with the Autobots (that doesn't constitute rebuilding and then stabbing them in the back). And when I was outlining/brainstorming I was like, "okay Megatron is probably going to have to make an example of some DJD member who lashes out and refuses to accept it. There's gonna be a little fucked up cult violence in here"
Except no, that smooth son of a bitch gave the DJD a speech that so effortlessly tied them up in his new peacetime plans that the most opposition he got was a muttered comment by one single member. My man used the brainwashing of nationalism and patriotism to counteract the cult brainwashing. He made a rhetorical appeal so sound that any member of the DJD who tried to argue against the peace treaty would sound like they were opposed to reclaiming Cybertron, their homeland, and ensuring the well-being of their own loyal soldiers. I was like "MEGATRON THERE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MORE CONFLICT IN THIS SCENE YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO CHOKE-LIFT A BITCH OR AT LEAST RIP OFF TARN'S MASK AS A DRAMATIC GESTURE OR SOMETHING" and the Megatron in my brain went "hahaha no" and charmed the DJD so thoroughly that there wasn't even a single raised voice. Charismatic son of a bitch
#wip stuff#i do think megatron's charismatic political side is like one of the coolest sides he has#i feel like with the majority of idw (and idw fanon) either focused on evil villain megatron#or mtmte sad and diminished megatron. ppl forget that this guy raised a whole army#not forgot exactly but like. i feel like i haven't seen much content emphasizing the CHARISMA specifically?#in the sense that this guy is a fucking wordsmith. an orator. he went from just a miner who wrote to a gladiator to a warlord#to like the full on leader of what was (briefly) a whole constellate or w/e of decepticon owned planets#that prowl quote about how his most dangerous weapon is his words was revealed to me akldjlksd#it sounds vain given that he's a fictional character and i'm the one writing him#but like gdi i had something different in mind for this scene i wanted it to be more tense and fraught#but then megatron was like. nah i'm going to defuse my mini group of cultists with a single dramatic speech#bc honestly when i look at my ideas vs how the scene turned out#it does make sense that rather than inviting dissent and having to beat the DJD into submission#megatron would instead spin a web of rhetoric to keep them under his hand and make them feel like this is their idea#or like that he completely changed decepticon ideology to work with the autobots but this isn't a betrayal at all it's just a new direction#w/ ppl that dangerous it fully makes sense that M would opt for a charming and disarming approach you know#anyways fuck this guy he's so fucking smart and charismatic and manipulative and he makes it look easy
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tdov was like a week ago already but I just wanna say when I came over to vacation slash help my sworn brother move flat he told me, "ever since you said you wanted to get top surgery I've been thinking about it. it's straight up number two on my bucket list"
#bakuspeech#number one is a house bc obviously. if u can own a house wouldnt u#he was very drunk at that time of the evening. I was not bc I have the constitution of a hot air balloon and any stimulant will blow me up#(relatively new development. france fucked me up big time turns out)#we held hand on his bed for like the whole evening. it was honestly very funny in hindsight but we were extremely earnest in the moment#and Im like. working on this thing as well. I dont got meds or therapy lmao Im bootstrappin here#but yeah early last year his bf offered to get me meds and I... turned it down... I think I was worried abt like. idk. something#but one year past looking back Im fully like that was a stupid move you shouldve gotten meds. youve once again fucked urself baku#but yeah with that kinda realization Ive also come to realized I've somewhat? accepted. that I'm just gonna be. like this#this in light of a number of likely chronic stuff too (hence my balloon-like constitution lmao) and#that's kinda bled into the rest of me without me really noticing#but him bringing that up fully unprompted... kinda jolted me out of it#its just. really incredibly sweet. that someone doesn't want me to settle for what I make do with#and like. preps for that work. just kinda held my hand and told me it's possible to do this actually#I didn't really express how I felt very well in that moment I think my brain is very bad and I process emotions with like a day of delay#but. well. Im thinking abt it Right Now. so yknow thats the kind of impact that had on me lol#not super sure why I wrote all this down here really. I think I just want a good n nice reminder that object permanence is real#and I exist in my friends' life even when Im going insane in a hole by myself#and with the power of friendship we can alter the universe's plan for ourselves and also kill god#that's that. anyways I eat lunch now and then pass out probably. last night was... eventful lmao#but!! very good things on the horizon hopefully. well manifestly we hold hammers and we use them#have a good day lads. let's go out and slay monsters under a highway
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the downside to being a sitcom neighbour sort of person is that when rough things happen and emotionally fuck u up a lil bit, it also sounds completely made up
#bert's dead dad tag#found out today the way my dad told mom he wanted a divorce?#he wrote her a letter and left it on the dining room table for her to find on the morning of her fortieth birthday#who the fuck does that dead father#like that is the sort of thing i would entirely make up if i needed everyone at the table to fuckin hate an npc#and at least one person would go 'you're laying it on a little bit heavy'#i know he did work to become a better person as he got older#which is good because BOY howdy was that man a piece of shit in the early 90s#and we are having Complicated feelings about it tonight and also for the last nine months#something something when i was writing his eulogy i came across an old article discussing something he did in the 90s#YDIP (your dad is problematic)#like yeah this is the sort of thing that would have been vaguely acceptable in the cultural context#but like. still objectively bad. potentially ruining several lives sort of bad.#learned this and then wrote the rest of his eulogy about how he was a great guy and how i'm lucky to have been his son#(which was rough enough on its own because i've never said 'i'm [dad's name]'s son' as many times as i did that trip home)#but like what else do you do? i sent off a message looking for more information#and that information if it comes is just gonna sit with me i guess#sure as hell not telling my sister and this whole thing i've been getting through without really having anyone here for me to talk to#(hence the big fuckoff tag rant. your problem now losers who like clicking the read more button)#so even if i get all the answers i want about this one thing it's not gonna do any good except putting an end to one question#but part of having a dead dad who's been out of the business of forming new memories since you came out is having more questions#answering this one's just gonna add even more questions to the pile#but. got fuckall else to do
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hhhhhhh i need someone in my fandom be into burps bc i neeeeeed burping headcannons for the guys i like😭😭😭😭 i cant make them myself and i know i’ll never get them:’)
Anon, I see you and feel this so much. It's hard being into something a bit more out there kink-wise or fandom-wise, but the intersection of both is even tougher. Believe me, I know how much it sucks for there to not be anything out there!
BUT while it might not be optimal, not all hope is lost. It never hurts to ask around in kink spaces if anyone else is into [x media]. Or alternately, simply try daydreaming. It might sound silly, but a good dose of fantasizing and seeing where your mind takes you can be a great way to come up with hcs. You don't have to do anything more with them or share them (though you always could)- sometimes there can be something enjoyable about finding kinky joy in daydreams all for yourself.
#i mean take me for an example#there is nothing else i've found out there about burping and my fave beyond the single fic i wrote#yes i keep saying i'll write a post about my hcs for him but honestly?#i have not had the time or the right opportunity to get in the right headspace for it lately#so i'm letting these ideas come to me one by one so i can do something more with them eventually#but until then- and even if i weren't going to post about them- what i have are still ideas i enjoy thinking about#tune into your desires and let your mind wander#it may end up in some strange but fun new places#imagination is a wonderful thing#but if that's something you struggle with (as in you have a hard time even coming up with ideas)#there's 0 shame in looking at things people have written about burps irt their faves or in general#it is human to see another's creativity and spin it off in your own way#anyway i clearly wish you luck!#ask#answered#anon
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hold on im still thinking about the giggle actually . rtd heard us (people who have never emotionally recovered from end of time) saying "good god watching 14 die on live television is going to kill me" and said "well! live :)"
#AND IT WAS SO GOOD!!!!!!#seagull.mp3#dw#iiii need to stop thinking about this before i explode. god#revisiting the horrible tragedy you wrote 15 years ago and giving them a happy ending instead??? giving them peace and love and joy???#insane behavior thank you mr davies for my LIFE#finally able to look forward to a new doctor without simultaneously mourning the previous one. chefs kiss#rtd era 1 was about misery and loneliness and rtd era 2 will be about joy?? and connection and love and happiness?? please??#this is like. healing something in my brain as i speak#good god
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on a second thought, it is the story akutami gege wants to tell and he should tell it exactly the way he wants.
#that is something i can respect no matter how far it might be from my expectations.#if it disappoints me it disappoints me...#so long as he is satisfied with the story he wrote.#looking forward to what conclusion this journey comes to...#(if you saw me say i did not know how i felt about the news... i have reflected on myself...)
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figured out how to edit the game files and combine some mods so i could try out different things with gale's earring because i have a lot of thoughts... also gale's earring should really be positioned lower but i'm having an issue with one of the mods, oh well
#baldur's gate 3#gale dekarios#oc: elenion silverdew#gale x tav#okay here's my thoughts that i didn't wanna put in the main post:#i think gale should choose--on his own without being prompted by anyone else--to leave his earring at stormshore tabernacle#but i don't think he should replace it immediately. elenion certainly wouldn't ask him to.#they WOULD be surprised and would wonder if he intends to replace it but they'd never press him to do so. especially not right then.#not when he has so much he needs to process and there's still no guarantee they'll both live through all this anyway.#however i do think gale brings up wanting to get a new earring sometime before their wedding#and i'm torn between 1) elenion offering to share his favorite pair of earrings with gale as a symbol of their bond#or 2) elenion offering to take gale shopping and gale just gets a simple stud that matches the jewel on his earrings#(i mean it IS blue which tim downie says is gale's favorite color so...)#OR 3) same as 2 but gale ends up picking out a gold sun to match his silver moon#okay whoops i just wrote an essay in the tags about something nobody but me cares about. oh well!#otp: you put the stars to shame#yeah i'm going to be cringe and assign an otp tag to gale and my oc. and what about it.#creme don't look
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#sometimes I will think about this quote I read once that said ‘Shakespeare wrote better than he could write. Michael Angelo painted#better than he could paint’ and the point was just. the art as something almost speaking through the artist#especially at certain points#and I feel that way about Taylor#I don’t know how to explain it but sometimes I hear her songs so differently than at other times#like sometimes. (this is going to sound insane) sometimes they sound too fast to me#like. it’s TOO efficient.#in terms of structure#because she is BRUTALLY efficient almost#and sometimes (sorry I keep using the word sometimes) I just want to reach out my hand and like. rest it over the song#and tell it to breathe. and at other times I can FEEL the song slot into place and I can feel the depths reached and I can feel the stars#align into place as she taps into the greater truth#like the first time I heard loml#and burst into tears#or when I listened to it again when I was on a drive in the mountains with Nina and I just started sobbing at the end#it doesn’t hit for me every single time (though every time it’s a good song)#is what I’m trying to say#and I think it’s because Taylor’s talent is the most restless spirit I’ve ever seen. she’s like a beanstalk growing right in front of me#and so as wonderful as she is she is never as wonderful as she WILL be#and I hate that attitude generally (so much) of being like ‘she’s just getting started that’s the crazy’#but the truest comments about Taylor ALWAYS say that#and it’s always struck me as true!!!! and that is why every album is better than the last and to an extent makes her previous work#look small in hindsight.#I keep being so struck by tortured poets and the way it has synthesized the personal and the storytelling#into a new blend we have NEVER seen before. the muses are present but theY ARE NOT PRESENT IN THE SAME WAY#they do ! not ! matter ! the way they used to#in her art she is getting farther away from what we call diaristic songwriting and she is moving deeper into the world of art#and as she does it you can FEEL (or at least I can feel or at least I think I can feel) the lightning and thunder (so to speak) gathering#in her heart and in her mind and in her journey and she is going to EXPLODE one of these days
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I'm looking at 2009 vettonso pics with cofi rn and they're so AUGHHHHH 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
Seriously like, calm before the storm, they don't know what's going to happen in the following seasons, they're quite cute with each other, etc. Actually their dynamic in these is similar to what they were like in the later years but the difference of "not knowing what's gonna happen yet" vs. "they've been through so much together and have both come out on the other side."
I mean I'm so vettonso-brained rn, as you know, so take this with a grain of salt, but for me it's like, Fernando looking at Seb like "hmmm who is this rookie, he reminds me of myself when I was in his position"
STOP BEING SO SOFT, YOU'RE GOING TO KILL ME 😭😭😭
#my personal thesis on vettonso is:#'two people who are very similar and have very paralleled careers but have been pitted against each other +#from the start so they cant see and appreciate those similarities because irs what they hate most about the other +#but then when they're both in the twilights of their careers they come to find they do in fact relate and like each other'#always interesting to me how their careers are slightly offset but parallel each other super well#but then the theoretical end is seb being accepting of his fate and passing the torch onto fernando so he can do what seb couldnt#but just the: baby at str/minardi youngest wdc -> ferrari failure and watchinf the new generation take over -> sent out to pasture kinda#sorry that is sooooooo depressing how i jjst wrote that LMAO#but again so so so happy that fernando is over here breaking the cycle and plotline by doing the things at Aston that seb was unable to#anf that hes onlt able to do those things because of all thw work seb put in 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺#feeling emotional today over THEM#theres just something to me how simialr they are but how they were forced into conflict#bcs looking at all of these 2009 pics. look at the potential of softness!!!! but they were always doomed to be enemies#anyways#in the au this would be them meeting before they know about the succession drama#theyre just two young royals who are meeting for a bit 🥺🥺🥺#and theyre like ah this guy!! pretty cool!!! and then it all falls apart#vettonso#catie.rambling.txt
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during the last millenium break “time passes” sequence sylvi mentioned millie bringing snacks for leap from her trips and i thought that was. so sweet
(still sitting & waiting for something terrible to happen to leap. not in a “man fuck this guy” way, just a “i know keith plays a different character later this season and its making me antsy” way.)
leap thoughts from work today. i made the og sketch for this at work. i really didnt get a lot done today...
its like. i know that jack and maybe also art(?) also play different characters but i KNOW clem (possibly s.i.?) is out there. ive accidentally glanced at fanart thats told me as much and im so excited for whatever the fuck is going to happen there BUT he point is theyre around. i dont have any reason to believe the same about leap.
also jack specifically is such a “leaning into decisions/consequences that are terrible for their character” and keith i feel just is not? (the deal with lyke in ep 47 would be an outlier to me. it ruled though. love that for him.) so basically i dont know what would have to happen to get to a point of leap dying. things would have to be REALLY bad, right?
the other option i guess is leap filling the drive clock and retiring and ill feel kind of silly for thinking about this so much if that was the case, BUT i truly dont think that that will happen. like partizan as a season is so. the vibes are DIRE the stakes are HIGH
HE WAS FINE
#exeter leap#partizan#friends at the table#fatt#rosa art#a year ago. or even a mere 6 months ago. i would not have imagined i could draw a weird robot. i would not have attempted it#thank youuuu friends at the table.#but this is looking pretty nice.#thank you clementinekesh on twitter (clementineskesh on here) who found keith describing a specific camera for leaps head#on a drawing maps. i was so sure he had said something like that. and he did#i just checked main feed episodes though and it wasnt anywhere there. thank you again if you see this#(the readmore just has leap thoughts. i wrote em down on a piece of paper at work & wanted to be able to find them again)#anyways im almost on the last millenium break episode. this weekend !#yall have fun with that new season though. watching the pre-premiere stream rn
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