#lois dont look

[t4tbruharvey]

I MISSED WRITING DRACULA FUCKING SUE ME

[on-the-clear-blue]

Dead Man's Diner pt 7

Hearing the chime of rhe bell above the door, Danny mentally prepared himself before poking his head around the corner "Heya! I will be with you in one hot sec!"

Rushing around the kitchen, Danny set the chili to simmer and quickly cleaned himself up before coming back to greet his newest customer.

Stepping upt to the bar, Danny put his best customer service smile on and opened his mouth to speak, but the words that came out were not in English.

"Hey there! Welcome to Big C's diner what can i..." Blinking a bit before frowning, Danny looked closer at his customer, his eyes flickering a bright green as he squinted at the man.

Because either this man was the very strong revenant that had claimed Crime alley as his huant, or there some how was a 4th Halfa in the world.

---

Jason found the little diner comfortable, more up to date than the typical dive that was in the Alley, there wasn't even any blood splatter in the back booths!

He kinda didn't like how there was only a single person working there at night, being so close to the Alley and all, but that was easily fixed if he just happened to come around in his Red Hood outfit.

Sending a smirk like smile to the teen that came out from the kitchen, who had the fakest smile that Jason had ever seen outside of a gala.

But his smirk slowly slipped as the kid spoke, his words both sounding clear and distorted at the same time, he could make out words but it was very clearly not words at the same time.

Then, the kid's eyes flashed, and Jason had seen those eyes before, he had seen them in the mirror more times than he was willing to admit.

(Holy shit this kid is about to have a Pit episode in front of me...how the fuck did this kid get in the pits?) Jason thought as he leaned back into his seat, his hand instantly going to where his guns usually were, but only grasped at air.

(Right...forgot those at home...) He thought, settling instead to set his hands on the counter, Jason narrowed his eyes at the teen

But just like that, the green was gone, and the teen cleared his throat, "Sorry about that, um, welcome to Big C's, what can I get ya?"

---

Danny gave a weak smile, he didn't exactly want to throw down with this potential halfa, sure he liked a good ghostly welcome every now and again, but he just cleaned up and he would like his diner to stay that way thank you!

The man across from him glared for amoment longer before shaking his head, "Shit, ugh...gimme a coffee and...what's your special today?"

Reaching for the coffee pot, Danny felt a rumble in the diner cart, and there was suddenly a chalk board on the wall behind him.

Pouring his customer a mug, his brain paused for a moment, translating the ghost script before he spoke "Cadavers chili hotdogs, made with 100% not person meat...I promise neither are made out of people, definitely didnt seen any bodies when I made it my guy."

---

Staring at the blackboard that Jason was very much sure wasn't there a moment ago, he felt his chest tighten and ache as he read the...sigils? Words? They were definitely something and he totally shouldn't know what they mean.

Biting back a snort at the dry comment, Jason focused on him "I will take two...Danny? That your name or just the name on the aprin you got?"

Jason was totally not digging for information, because he totally wasn't a Bat or a Bird, and he totally didn't have an urge to know everything about the person across from him.

Getting a dry chuckle from the guy on the other side of the counter, who could only shake his head, "Sadly, that's my name, I will be back in a sec with your food, no running off tho' ya hear? Already dealt with dine and dashers once this week."

Letting out a chuff, Jason kept his eyes around the room, he knew logically he should be more freaked out by this whole experience, but he couldn't help but feel his body relax and his mind comfortable slow.

Holding the cup of coffee in both hands, he took a long sip and memories hit him harder than a crowbar.

It was his mother's coffee, not the bitch that sold him out but his mama, Catherine, the woman that struggled to keep him happy and fed.

It was the watered down brew, stretched to make it last longer.

It was milky and sweet with sugar packets pilfered form diners such as this and powdered milk he used to steal from the grocery store just for her.

His mama gave up so much for him, why couldn't he just do one little petty theft for her?

His heart aches again, and the intense feel of the pits roar in his ears, but they weren't calling for blood, the pits crooned in nostalgic heart break.

Usually remembering before his death was a trigger, was something that made him rage, but right now? He could only mourn for the mother and son that used to cuddle up together under a ratty blanket, of the mother that whispered stories to him during long quiet nights, of the woman that he had found dead on one such quiet night.

---

Tossing on the last bit of fresh diced onions, Danny had a cheesy grin on his face as he brought the plate to the front, mouth opening to speak before noticing his customers disposition.

He was hunched over on himself, looking small (which was impressive for a man thst looked twice his size and 4 times more muscular)

Tears were streaming down his face as he stared at the now half full mug, for some reason it felt heart breaking to see.

Setting the plate down carefully in front of the man, Danny placed a hand on his shoulder, "It's okay man...your okay bud." Awkwardly Patting his customers shoulder, Danny felt a bit of panic, he wasn't Jazz he didn't know how to like, console people!

It took a few minutes for the man to calm, and Danny handed him a few paper towels to clean himself up, patting him on the back one last time, Danny let out a breath he didn't know he was holding, "Well...um, hope that the coffee is so bad that it made you cry, I-uhh, could comp it if you want?"

The man just shook his head, "Fuckin' hell, ain't bad, just...God damn it..."

---

Rubbing at his eyes Jason huffed, "Sorry for, um....blubbering on ya like that..

don't usually get teary at coffee, that's more of Timmer's shtick, just tastes...tastes like my mom's coffee when I was a kid..." shaking his head, Jason looked at the chili dogs, they still steamed, the cheese now melted on nicely.

Danny just nodded, "Yeah, some reason i have gotten a few comments on that" shrugging his shoulders, he started to figgle with a cloth, wipping down the counter as he spoke "Meh, Gotham is fucked up and I don't want to even begin to try and figure out."

Croaking out a laugh Jason dragged the plate of food closer, "Fucking right about that...though if you keep making it like that you got yourself a regular customer."

Reaching a hand across the counter, Jason gave Danny a weak smile, "Names Jason, nice to meet ya."

Taking the hand, Danny gave a smirk back, "Got it, one sad cup of coffee for you then-" Snapping his head over as he heard a beeping sound, Danny got a panicked look on his face "Oh shit! My cookies!"

---

Storming to the back, Danny ran to the oven, throwing it open, scrambling for the oven mits, he phased a hand through them instead of tugging them on, and quickly pulls the smoaking batch of sweets from the rack.

Plopping them on the counter, he hears the oven snap shut as he sighs, turning to thank the diner, he pauses to see the sight of a man he was hoping that he would never have to see again.

"Oh little Bager, King of the Realms making food for the common folk? How the great have fallen.." Vald said with a viscous grin, his hand reaching up to flip off the oven, "Did you think I wouldn't find you? Thought you could rum off and not tell dear old Uncle? Don't worry Bager, while old Vlad might not come around to vist much..."

There was a flash of black light and where a man once stood was a ghost, his grin pulled back devilishly "I am sure Plasmius will make up for it very...very well."

---

Laughing a bit as he watched Danny scramble inot the back, Jason stared at the food, he was still hungry but...he held an apprehension of sorts, was this going to bring back memories? Would they be good like the coffee or...

His thoughts were cut off as a body was through through the deviding wall from the front of the house to the kitchen.

Bolting up out of his seat, he watched as Danny stepped out of the hole in the wall, shaking out his fist as he did, "I really don't have the fucking time for you Plasmius, don't you see I have a customer?"

Jason stared as the body that was punched through the wall, that looked mangled, twisted and broken start to twitch and crack back into place, limbs bending back from positions they should never be, and then the man sat up, a feral grin on his lips.

(Really fucking bad day for not having my God damn guns.)

[lichenbug]

im obsessed with how much pinkie Was Not having it in the village

ALSO i drew this and then i went to get like. a few screenshots or smth to show what i meant but like. look.

i literally got it perfect. i didnt have this image when i drew it. im fantastic.

[sisaloofafump]

Will they ever do this? No. But it's funny to imagine how far DC will push the no-homo here.

[fishfingersandjellybabies]

Went to reread supersons comics and oh my GOD jon definitely has a crush on damian cause what the f*ck was all that about

Headcanon that Damian is totally Jon's bi awakening

I also sometimes like to think Damian is Jon’s subconscious bi awakening, but moreso, I want Damian to be Jon’s PARENTS queer awakening.

Jon rants about how Damian saved the day for like three hours some evening, and after he goes to bed, Clark is like ‘wow, I didn’t realize his friendship with Damian was so strong.’

To which Lois just non-chalantly says something like ‘yeah never heard someone talk about someone else like that and just be platonic besties.’

And then they just sit there for a second.

Then Lois gasps and covers her mouth to hold in her excited scream. Clark immediately is like ‘oh god Bruce is gonna kill my son for crushing on his son.’

[nat-20s]

Genuinely the #1 deciding factor of a good Clois is whether or not they strongly resemble a Cary Grant and Katherine Hepburn ass couple. If they don't seem like they'd thrive in a 1930s screwball comedy situation then I'm NOT INTERESTED

[undefeatablesin]

Another WIP ft. Good Hunter Aloysha, who I have missed dearly 💫

[patentedsun]

sorry I'm so MIA but I've been rewatching Malcolm in the middle and a lot of the opinions I've seen online COUGH REDDIT COUGH r quite frankly just bizarre as in, quoting myself, "when The Boys in mitm do something genuinely illegal and terrible and everyone understands it's a sitcom and can giggle but when The Mom is yelling exaggeratedly suddenly this is a Serious Show and she's abusive and narcissistic and should die 🤨"

[i-cast-zone-of-truth]

Miles Vorkosigan is literally if "curiosity killed the cat / but satisfaction brought him back" was a person. Straight he may ultimately be, but im sorry Lois you CANNOT tell me he has not personally investigated every type of consensual sexual experience offered to him. You're telling me he'll have an intimate and mutually satisfying sexual relationship with a female werewolf but intersex BEL THORNE is a bridge too far? Girl.

[werewolfclaws]

cant stop thinking about peter griffin buying the scary weed from poison ivy

[hugh-lauries-bald-spot]

fat clark/superman still reigns supreme

they are eepy

[ultfreakme]

I have to laugh when people act like people buying SOKE or AOSJK, or being invested in Jon as a teenager because he's bi or because he's in a relationship with Jay is a bad thing.

As if Super Sons' stans don't read that book solely for the Damian and Jon dynamic(for shipping reasons mostly). Like I have never seen someone go "Oh yes Jon seemed so intriguing alone".

At LEAST SOKE & AOSJK is solely about JON.

[dc-sideblog]

[id: three images of Lois Lane drawn in designer business clothing]

[senseiwu]

Freaking... how is THIS ONE not Jon??

HELLO??

[nomaishuttle]

finished rereading hmc By the way. good book