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Live, Love and Learn (1937) George Fitzmaurice
November 5th 2024
#live love and learn#1937#george fitzmaurice#robert montgomery#rosalind russell#robert benchley#helen vinson#monty woolley
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The beauty with a book is that if you feel you've missed something you can go back.
Reread.
And find those missing details.
In reality it's very different.
You cannot change the past.
You cannot rewrite your story but you can hope that the pages ahead will now begin to make sense.
There's a reason your story is written the way it is.
Even if that is to simply grow from the chain or events you've been dealt.
The beauty of a book, your book, is that it is yours.
Whether you believe the pages are prewritten or you write them as you go.
It is your story, your beautiful complex story.
But it is yours.
#personal#beauty#books#late night thoughts#late night writing#poetry#prose#spilled ink#spilled thoughts#dark academia#light academia#your story#write your own story#live love and learn
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Emmrich & Lucanis banter about/with Spite because it's a very fun angle of conversation between them
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#i just love them. this banter. these talks#spite slowly understanding space ;-; a demon of spite learning how to live through lucanis. and learning to love coffee very possibly#its all very interesting#also the fire thing lol#lucanis#emmrich#spite#spite dragon age#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#lucanis dellamorte#emmrich volkarin#datv#da4#da4 spoilers#datv spoilers#dragon age the veilgaurd spoilers#mine#gif:da#long post
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rewatching Avatar is so weird because Sokka is literally the only thing keeping them alive and fed. He constantly is like,
'guys we're out of supplies/ we need to stop/ we're attracting too much attention with the flying bison we should walk' etc.
Like in the ´The Storm' when they're completely out of money and supplies the one to get a job in hopes of making money (he never actually gets paid, the world hates him) is Sokka.
In 'The Waterbending Scroll,' it's Sokka who's concerned about their lack of supplies when Aang sends them in a wave down the river, and is making sure they're careful with their spendibg when in town shopping.
He's also seen to catch fish and gather nuts (I know more often than not he fails to catch things on screen but it's implied he's the one that does most of the hunting and gathering)
It's like- Aang totally would have starved to death or gotten completely off track with often they're completely out of food and money
#atla#avatar the last airbender#sokka#Katara#Aang#He's such an older brother#in the waterbeding scroll when he asks Katara when shes learned#like aughhhh#I also live for him and the Kyoshi warriors#totally love him and Suki
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The true botw shrine experience. I don't think Four approves!
The full comic page and some colorful Fours can be found under the read more!
A meme redraw based on something I did in a playthrough lol. Out of arrows? Throw your sword!
I love Four so much aaAA
#linked universe#linkeduniverse#lu four#lu wild#lu hyrule#lu warriors#comic#good morning! good mooorning!#I've looked at this for so long that I can't tell if it's funny anymore ahjsgfsdf#I love Four and Wild's dynamic after the colors reveal + tomato is a fruit comic#they are like Legend and Wars are to each other to me#would die for each other and live to mess with each other#they are like siblings poking each others buttons. it's all about the antagonism and goofs >:)#but also they get good learning moments so good for them#addition: yeah it is based on the anakin and padme meme
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
Plain-text version:
Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
#hlep#original#mental health#my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it#i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support#and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of#huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the#longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel#i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop
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DELAINEY HAYLES as Claudia
Interview with the Vampire, AMC - Series 2, Episode 6
#learning some new gif making stuff and im living rn at the quality of these#the first gif is my favourite#love and miss you dearly claudia#amc iwtv#amc interview with the vampire#iwtv#interview with the vampire#claudia#the vampire claudia#claudia de lioncourt#claudia de pointe du lac#delainey hayles#megan makes
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When I say I really want a Jason adopts tim fic, I don't mean I want him to become a parent at 19 to a teen like 2-4 years younger than him, I want Jason to meet Tim and decide that he wants Tim on his side.
I want Jason to adopt Tim as his Robin, like he decides that he wants to recruit this 15 year old that is some how the smartest and snarkiest person in Gotham. I don't want infantilised tim, I want a sorta Nani and Lilo sibling dynamic, but with a smaller age gap.
Like sure, Jason sees his little brother as some sort of soggy kitten that he must protect, but also a Tim that is very capable of looking after himself.
I want Tim to look at Jason, see Bruce back when he first donned the Cape and traffic light colours. And then in true Tim fashion decide to fix him, B was being too over protective since Red Hood showed up anyways.
Like imagine, Jason meeting Tim instead by accident when he drops in on a drug trade. Tim says some quip that throws him off his game while fighting. Jason basically losing to a very deadly fifteen year old who's not slept in 29 hours, and he thinks 'f it, I like the kid'. Then trying to recruit him consistently until Tim goes 'why tf not'.
I want enemies to caretaker, but they both think they're the caretaker
#could also add an appearance of JJ#for angst#cuz we love angst#basically#i want to utilise Tims unconfortable feels around people putting him first#and Jason's inability to see Bruce as a person who can learn from his mistakes and be a semi decent parent#and then let it somehow force a brothers buddy comedy#also#lets face it#tim isnt like totally with the no killing rule he just lives by it so he can monitor batman#also defo tim having to sit down jason and ask him to trust that tim wont just suddenly break#basically we need tim to work through his issues of deciding to be a emotional support child#and jason needs to work through his abandonment issues#obviously this idea needs work#but like#its funny#batman#bruce wayne#jason todd#red hood#dick grayson#nightwing#batfam#clark kent#tim drake#batman and robin#robin#red robin
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The people want to see Mithrun’s second life (me, I’m people)
Inspired by this post. Mithrun having service animals is just perfect! Can’t believe I never thought of that. He always has a big team caring for him but in Melini, he needs to manage on his own at times when he’s not working and Pattadol is busy
#Lasagna helps him form habits while Udon helps him maintain his health#For some reason I keep drawing Mithrun just chilling on furniture#traumatised man learning to live his second life#google says German Shepherd can be service dog and I love that#my first OCs and they are a dog and a cat#Mithrun#mithrun of the house of kerensil#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#my art
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Imagine you live in pelican town. The new farmer has been here a couple weeks now and seems to be settling in, except... He's picking the weirdest friend choices. Like sure it's not weird to befriend the local fisherman, especially when he has an interest in fishing himself, but you're pretty sure you've seen him rooting through the Saloon's garbage with the local homeless man. As well, he keeps harassing the poor guy who works at Joja even though you KNOW he doesn't want to be friends with him.
And since you're on the topic of weirdness, isn't it odd he seemingly runs everywhere at a full sprint? Or just... Eats entire raw fish while fishing for "energy reasons"...
...
Despite all that, it's too early to call him off putting or anything... He has been engaging in town traditions, and he's started helping out with the old community centre. He's probably like the rest of you. Someone with a few quirks, that will fit in with the valley great!
Surely he can't get any weirder... Right?
#been playing my new sdv save some more recently#i keep thinking about the whole “eldritch” farmer thing#where the famer is just... objectively strange#i fucking love it#i love the idea of the farmer being some sort of higher being#someone who doesnt understand local conventions#someone who doesnt get why its considered weird to eat whole raw fish fresh from the river#or how it might be offputting to greet someone for the first time using their name#but at the same time#this eldritch entity genuinely wants to be a part of the community#they want to learn and they want to love and they want to learn to love#i see minmaxxer/speedrunner eldritch famer a lot#mainly played off for gags#but not genuinely loving their live in the valley eldritch farmer#at least not often#theres so much temptation to write an eldritch farmer x shane fanfic set in spring 1 or some shit lmao#text post#stardew valley#sdv#sdv farmer
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Kinda wild that Edwin realizes his love for Charles and confesses to him like, the day after. Bro is not losing time
#edwin realizes he likes charles one day and then the next day it's like#“if i do not confess to charles RIGHT NOW i will explode”#'charles is the lover' yeah sure but edwin learns he's in love with charles and immediately is like 'i have to tell charles'#edwin payne does not pine quietly he litteraly stops charles on their way to escape to tell him#this is why he had to be an edwardian repressed guy if he was out and proud since day 1 he and charles would be bf since the attic /hj#anyways live laugh love edwin#dead boy detectives#edwin payne#payneland#paynland
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I just found your Itty Bitty Au and I have to say, I love how you've written Perry and the other fairies to be... just a bit selfish? How Perry won't consider turning Dev into a Fairy- not because he doesn't really care about him or thinks there's a moral issue with it, but because if he turns Dev into a fairy it'll negatively effect HIM. Also, super excited to see more of Timmy (both)!
Fairies are not like humans in that they have “Good or Bad” morals. Fairies, by nature, are extremely selfish. They don’t care for human conflicts, human goodness, or human morale.
A fairy’s first priority is doing their job right for their court, and their second priority is doing what they want most. Selfishness is innate for Fairies as Compassion is innate for Humans.
Cosmo and Wanda are outliers in that they care about their godchildren to an emotional degree. It’s what made them the best fairies to be godparents!! Peri… doesn’t understand that quite yet.
Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]
#fairly oddparents#fop#fop a new wish#fop peri#fop dev dimmadome#fop dev#peri#dev dimmadome#asks#itty bitties fop au#FAIRIES ARE INHERENTLY SELFISH. IT THEIR MOST BASIC TRAIT#COMPASSION IS SOMETHING THEY MUST LEARN#cosmo and wanda loves timmy turner!! but their love is entirely selfish!!!! peri wants to be a godparent!! for selfish reasons!#another reason timmy fits so well as a fairy is because their selfish ways of living doesnt bother him. he's JUST as selfish as they are.#hazel could never become a fairy she's too kind too empathetic too too human.#peri likes being dev's godparent! he wants to make his kid happier!! but its not for the same reasons a human caretaker would have#not to worry though. peri will slowly learn how to be compassionate as the story goes on!!! prolonged exposure to humans will do that to hi#(also if ur confused about the gold floating around dev)#(thats the wishes dev has inside of him. that he's not verbalizing out loud)#(aka: uncollected fairy food)
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:]
#hoof draws#comics#hoofology#i love the era where bunny kinda dresses like shit and lives off of junk food in his first few years living ''alone''#because he never really learned how to live like a person in his parents' house#grow your hair out... one step at a time....#other context- bunny being some degree of transfem has become inextricable from their character arc
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So you know how in the show, Annabeth is a black girl? Annabeth in the books is always mentioned to not be very careful of her appearance. She has curly blonde hair that she never really takes much care of and stuff, for instance. But in the show, she has really nice braids, etc. Now mind you, annabeth ran away from home when she was 7 years old, and her stepmom is Asian in the books and canonically wasn’t the most caring to annabeth for the years they spent together. This means, to me, that show-Annabeth never had anybody to teach her how to do her hair. She gets to camp half blood at 7 little years of age and is obliviously running around with a messy head of hair that she has no idea (and also probably doesn’t really care) how to take care of. My headcanon is that some black girl from the Aphrodite cabin saw her and was like “not on my watch” and took it upon herself to both braid annabeth’s hair and to teach her how to do it herself.
I also like to think Percy 100% learns how to braid hair just for Annabeth. And she doesn’t even know it because it happens during some school year. He stepped inside a braiding salon a couple of blocks from his apartment one day and was like “hi, sorry to bother, I wanna learn how to braid my friends hair” and the ladies at the salon where enchanted with this weird kid who came out of nowhere and who would NOT stop yapping about this cute black girl at summer camp who he absolutely was in love with but none of the ladies had the heart to tell him that because he seemed oblivious to his own feelings. So they taught him for free as long as he helped around the salon. And then one day at camp, he goes to get her at the athena cabin and Annabeth is sitting in her bed with a couple of mirror and a cloud of hair all around her and Percy’s like “need a hand?” And Annabeth’s like “as if you could help, seaweed brain” and percy just goes “is that a challenge?” And he helps her part her hair which can be a pain to do by yourself and then they both sit on her bed for hours doing knotless braids (Annabeth was wholly unconvinced he knew how to do them until he started working on a section of hair and it was all she could do to not hang her mouth open in surprise). Percy wasn’t quite as fast as annabeth had gotten after so many years of doing her own hair, but with his help it took half the time it would’ve taken her alone. The other kids of the athena cabin would stare at them from the door of the cabin and proceed to hightail it out of there. The amount of gossip going around camp that day was astronomical. But the two of them were oblivious in their little hyperfixated adhd bubble. After that it became tradition, as long as he could, Percy would help Annabeth braid her hair.
#pjo show#percabeth#hair braiding#percy lives in nyc ofc there’s a braiding salon like 2 minutes from his house#idk where chronologicaly im placing this headcanon I just like the idea of percy learning for her#i love these two and I know he would do it#sally would cry#clarisse 100% made fun of him for it btw#beckendorf’s respect for percy soared that day
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the only thing keeping him alive are his cartoon physics
#smoking#tw smoking#turbo#turbo wir#turbo wreck it ralph#my art#i keep making somewhat high effort shitposts#as in it takes me days to finish#i just love making everything i do a learning experience no matter what it is#i love living and laughing and loving abd learning 🌏#Yes i am going to utilize Turbo smoking 500 cigarettes as a way to educate myself on how to crosshatch and draw him in a diff style. Ok👼👍#ignore the peculiar anatomy...im working on it 👷#wreck it ralph#SILLY TIME
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hope you feel better soon!
I am riddled with ailments, but I stay silly!
#ask#non mdzs#My health journey has been: Hernia -> acid reflux -> Vocal pain due to aforementioned reflux -> chest infection.#I'm terrified to know what's about to hit me next. Please let it be something kind. PLEASE.#The consequence of living with linguists is that you'll wake up with a wacked up voice -#suddenly you're sitting you down in front of a program called something like Praat having your shimmer and jitter levels calibrated.#They gave me a GRBAS of 33012. I have a fun thing called a pitch break where a whole octave just does not exist.#My vocal pain was bad enough I ended up seeing a speech pathologist and that whole experience was super neat!#I learnt a lot about voice - to be honest I might make a little comic on it after some more research. Fascinating stuff.#For example; your mental perception of our voice modulates the muscles of the vocal folds and larynx.#meaning that when you do have changes (inflammation = more mass = lower frequency)#your brain automatically attempts to correct it to what it 'should sound like'. Leading to a lot more vocal strain and damage!#And it gets really interesting for trans voice care as well - because the mental perception of one's voice isn't based on an existing sampl#So a good chunk of trans voice training is also done with the idea of finding one's voice and retraining the brain to accept it. Neat!#Parkinsonial Voice also has this perception to musculature link! The perception is that they are talking at a loud/normal volume#but the actual voice is quite breathy and weak. So vocal training works on practicing putting more effort into the voice#and retraining the brain to accept the 'loud' voice as 'normal'.#Isn't the human body fascinating?#Anyhow; Now I have vocal exercises and strategies to reduce strain and promote healing.#Which is a lot better than my previous strategy of yelling AAAH in my car until my 'voice smoothed out'.#You can imagine the horror on the speech path's face. I am an informed creature now.#I'm my own little lab rat now. I love learning and researching. Welcome to my tag lab. Class is dismissed.#I'll be back later with a few more answered asks </3 despite everything I'm still going to work and I need the extra sleep.#Thank you for the well wishes! And if you read all of that info dump; thank you for that as well!
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