#little less passionately???? like i am right here???)

[thegardengrows-infrozenrain]

this is what the next album will be called won't it /j

[scooter-sketch]

Reposting this for shits and giggles bc I don't expect asks about this lol. But I'll answer some in the tags

Weird Questions for Writers (because writers are weird)

1. What font do you write in? Do you actually care or is that just the default setting?

2. If you had to give up your keyboard and write your stories exclusively by hand, could you do it? If you already write everything by hand, a) are you a wizard and b) pen or pencil?

3. What is your writing ritual and why is it cursed?

4. What’s a word that makes you go absolutely feral?

5. Do you have any writing superstitions? What are they and why are they 100% true?

6. What is your darkest fear about writing?

7. What is your deepest joy about writing?

8. If you had to write an entire story without either action or dialogue, which would you choose and how would it go?

9. Do you believe in ghosts? This isn’t about writing I just wanna know

10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you?

11. Do you believe in the old advice to “kill your darlings?” Are you a ruthless darling assassin? What happens to the darlings you murder? Do you have a darling graveyard? Do you grieve?

12. If a genie offered you three writing wishes, what would they be? Btw if you wish for more wishes the genie turns all your current WIPs into Lorem Ipsum, I don’t make the rules

13. What is a subject matter that is incredibly difficult for you write about? What is easy?

14. Do you lend your books to people? Are people scared to borrow books from you? Do you know exactly where all your “lost” books are and which specific friend from school you haven’t seen in twelve years still possesses them? Will you ever get them back?

15. Do you write in the margins of your books? Dog-ear your pages? Read in the bath? Why or why not? Do you judge people who do these things? Can we still be friends?

16. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever used as a bookmark?

17. Talk to me about the minutiae of your current WIP. Tell me about the lore, the history, the detail, the things that won’t make it in the text.

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end. Spicy addition: Questioner provides the passage.

19. Tell me a story about your writing journey. When did you start? Why did you start? Were there bumps along the way? Where are you now and where are you going?

20. If a witch offered you the choice between eternal happiness with your one true love and the ability to finally finish, perfect, and publish your dearest, darlingest, most precious WIP in exactly the way you've always imagined it — which would you choose? You can’t have both sorry, life’s a bitch

21. Could you ever quit writing? Do you ever wish you could? Why or why not?

22. How organized are you with your writing? Describe to me your organization method, if it exists. What tools do you use? Notebooks? Binders? Apps? The Cloud?

23. Describe the physical environment in which you write. Be as detailed as possible. Tell me what’s around you as you work. Paint me a picture.

24. How much prep work do you put into your stories? What does that look like for you? Do you enjoy this part or do you just want to get on with it?

25. What is a weird, hyper-specific detail you know about one of your characters that is completely irrelevant to the story?

26. How do you get into your character’s head? How do you get out? Do you ever regret going in there in the first place?

27. Who is the most stressful character you’ve ever written? Why?

28. Who is the most delightful character you’ve ever written? Why?

29. Where do you draw your inspiration? What do you do when the inspiration well runs dry?

30. Talk to me about the role dreams play in your writing life. Have you ever used material from your dreams in your writing? Have you ever written in a dream? Did you remember it when you woke up?

31. Write a short love letter to your readers.

32. What is a line from a poem/novel/fanfic etc that you return to from time and time again? How did you find it? What does it mean to you?

33. Do you practice any other art besides writing? Does that art ever tie into your writing, or is it entirely separate?

34. Thoughts on the Oxford comma, Go:

35. What’s your favorite writing rule to smash into smithereens?

36. They say to Write What You Know. Setting aside for a moment the fact that this is terrible advice...what do you Know?

37. If you were to be remembered only by the words you’ve put on the page, what would future historians think of you?

38. What is something about your writing process YOU think is Really Weird? If you are comfortable, please share. If you’re not comfortable, what do you think cats say about us?

39. What keeps you writing when you feel like giving up?

40. Please share a poem with me, I need it.

[matsunoluvr]

୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ how I think the boys from love and deepspace would give a first kiss :3

warnings: suggestive content (obviously?), writing might be out of character, spoilers in general, i get carried away explaining everything because i'm afraid of being accused of mischaracterisation

[story spoiler] first kiss = first kiss where mc is a hunter/the timeline in game

authors notes: i have favourites and it will show CLEARLY in my writing… sorry (not sorry no1 rafayel stan) and i am a yapper

characters: rafayel, xavier, zayne and sylus

link to my master list here!!

more below the cut :3

sorry rafayel... but i feel like he's the most unskilled at kisses because - hear me out - you're his very first kiss. lemurians as a species seem to value bonds and loyalty, and as the literal sea god he wasn't able to nor wanted to just hook up or mess around - he's looking for devotion!!!

(okay, we ignore the kiss in forgotten sea myth story because like come on there was literally no romance mc was drowning)

definitely waits a while before kissing you, rayafel really takes his time to fall into place. after all, he needs to make sure his beloved bride/groom is well and truly his!!!

the type to wait for the ‘right moment’ - but doesn’t force or stage it ykwim? like the time comes naturally - e.g. watching the sunset, or you’re leaning close to him whilst he’s painting

he’s a romantic 100% like there’s a reason his 'floral promise' card was (imo) way fluffier compared to the others - like xavier's was tender-ish but rafayel was fucking melting

he's a sweet talker I just know it.

that charm he uses on his clients? he doesn't want to nor will he manipulate you with it but you know he's going to ramp up the charm to tease you a little

definitely knows his effect on you and uses it to his full advantage (cough cough fiery undercurrents secret times) like whispering in your ear, making excuses to touch you or get close to you

(i think he’d be more 'traditional' because of lemurian customs - the whole bonding + [forgotten sea spoilers] the sea god ceremony where the mc must devote themselves to rafayel displaying a strong level of devotion)

SUCH A GENTLE KISSER OMG like compared to his almost bratty and childish personality he’s a gentleman when it comes to kisses (also because he's kind of unsure what to do...)

the type to tuck strand of your hair behind your ear, fiddle with it a little maybe twirl it around his finger before trailing a finger along your jawline... i can see him like massaging your ear too? idk how to describe it he's a handsy man

first kiss was definitely more sweet than passionate ugawhriulgs he's such a cutie

right after the first kiss i think he’d be pretty affectionate, rather than bratty/tsundere since for him to kiss someone i believe he’d really need to love them (and therefore is more open to being vulnerable)

affectionate as in saying something cheesy probably, commenting on how you tasted or another one of his poetic, artistic quotes (dw raf we love it)

wouldn't be satisfied with just one after that, i can see him going in for a more passionate second and even a third (i mean look at his 'floral promise' memory OR 'fiery undercurrents') in the same few minutes

these follow up kisses would probably be longer and way less chaste, hands moving from tilting your chin up to your waist ahahahahahuwfa

you'd have to show him the appeal of tongue if that's your thing because he's seen it before but never really saw what was nice about it

"But... you're just drinking each other's saliva?" "Rafayel that's hot-"

definitely relived the moment in his head hundreds of times after that night - and you bet your ass he painted a piece inspired from your first kiss with him

any kisses after that i feel like they would follow this default pattern;

if he initiated the kiss i think he’d be more cocky and teasing, especially if he surprised you with one and he sees your flustered face

“Didn’t expect that huh, cutie?”

if you surprised him, however, get ready for typical rafayel childish behaviour, blushing and averting his eyes, covering his mouth with the back of his hand and a pout

“Hey- what was that for!!” Σ（・□・；）

either way rafayel is the worlds silliest man and would cave into literally anything with just a few kisses from you

ALSO KISS HIS COLLAR BONES AND YOU'VE GOT A WHOLE NEW SCENARIO TO UNFOLD

oh i just have a feeling this man is devouring you because puh-LEASEE?? sir we aren't forgetting your 'tender night' card i know that night was anything but tender

xavier is the definition of pent-up desire because this man has been waiting a LONG time and he's not going to be able to hold back very well

(taking heavy inspiration from his '21 days' memory because with his reaction it kind of feels like his first kiss with mc... but tbh i don't know much about xavi)

he's definitely not shy when it comes down to it, yeah he gets flustered if he thinks about it because of course imagining kissing the person he's pined over for centuries is going to fluster the shit out of him but he doesn't shy away form the idea or avoid the topic in conversation

i feel like he'd bring it up casually - like in the 'partner go go' event (aka heartbreaker-chasing-rhythm-game event) he was so insistent on the 'kissing page'

mc was like "apparently you can solve arguments with a kiss" and this mf straight up said "we can argue then" this man is STARVED

i feel like you'd need to initiate the kiss or give him very clear signs you'd be okay with a kiss for it to happen, i don't know why i just feel like he's that type of person

the first kiss is deep despite him trying his best to hold back - you can just feel his desire and longing oozing out of him and he's definitely on fucking cloud nine

xavier's holding your face and stroking his thumb along your cheek and god damn he's good at kissing where the fuck did he learn this from?

the type to break the kiss and then fucking bulldoze into the next one and my god his restraints have broken and he's actually kissing you as if it's the last thing he's able to do on earth

100% a tongue user he's biting at your bottom lip before slipping it in the sly minx

after the kiss he's more flustered than he expected to be - kissing the love of his life (literally) sends him into a flurry of emotions he's never really experienced before

given how possessive xavier is i wouldn't be surprised if halfway through making out he managed to leave a hickey or two in very. visible. places.

he isn't even pretending to feel guilty in the slightest, a smug grin as he shrugs out a half-assed apology.

"Sorry, I guess you'll have to try hide it. Or don't, that would be easier."

if you leave any marks on him he's not leaving you along that night. forget sleeping you two are recreating 'tender night' ALL night.

but seriously, if you leave hickeys over his neck (his canonical sensitive area and where he feels vulnerable) he's going to go crazy because what do you mean you want everyone to know he's yours??? what do you mean you want him as much as he wants you??

tldr; xavier is unusually talented with his mouth and is desperate to prove it to you.

i accidentally wrote way more for xavier than i expected i even cut out some bits holy crap maybe i’m more into xavi than i thought

oh no... zayne you beautiful man i am so sorry... (here comes the one character i have no idea how to characterise + no clue about his lore zayne fans pls bear with me)

okay - zayne looks like a gentleman and i'm sure he very much is even in intimate moments, but i cannot get rid of the idea that his first kiss w you was lowk spicyyyyy

like OH MY GOD I JUST WATCHED SNOWY SERENITY RN I FUCKIGN KNEW IT

that man was pouncing on you in a hospital bed, dishevelled, and kissing you deep my god like the type of kiss that literally as you forgetting where you are

i feel like zayne would be the one to initiate the kiss, again no idea why maybe i'm falling into the dominant zayne agenda

you're probably surprised when he kisses you because he's usually so composed, the 'cold unfeeling' dr zayne - then suddenly he's panting and pushing himself on top of you (consensually of course), pinning you down and going to town.

when he kisses you i don't think he's much of a lip biter, but if you bite his lips or lick at him or anything he's not opposed, as long as your lips are on his and vice versa

after the first kiss he's going straight into another one, his patience has thinned to the point of snapping and now he just needs you.

his hands what does he do with his hands? i'm thinking the typical otome face hold, gentle grasp juxtaposing his fervent kisses LOL

now, why does he kiss you?? how does this all build up? unfortunately all i can think of to match this scenario is something angsty or something along the lines of zayne has fucking had it and all he wants is you

"I need you... please."

this is the type of kiss where he wants to drown in you, breathe you in and just smother his being into yours to forget and erase whatever else is happening/happened

if he's kissing you and pinning you down and you bring up your hand to interlock fingers with him - your warm hands against his cool hands? wow his kissing is all of a sudden even more passionate.

after the little make out session he's going to go all mushy on you, physical affection of an embrace something uncharacteristic of him to match his dishevelled state

in kisses after the first i like the idea that he checks your pulse mid make-out and just silently smirks/chuckles when he notices it's faster and more erratic than usual

"Why are you nervous, this isn't our first time."

he also has this sneaky habit of whispering incredibly close to your ear, the reason why i choose to point this out it because i feel like sometimes he uses his evol to his advantage to like, breathe out cool air on your neck/ear and likes to watch you shiver

the ultimate dominant figure if you try to kiss him first and take control he somehow manages to overcome you and take the lead without using his strength, just good ol' sweet talking and technique

congratulations, you managed to snatch a kiss from the renown leader sylus!!!

i can see why people would think he's promiscuous or a fuck-boy because honestly i see it, but imo just because he is more flirtatious, assertive and... responsive (try tapping his... crotch... in the café LOL) does NOT = play boy

to me it just shows that - unlike the other LIs - sylus is just more forward with his approach, he has that devil-may-care like feel to him ykwim?

"Do I like you? What type of question is that, isn't it obvious? Or do I need to show you?" is much different to "Hey baby girl lemme rock your world tnite xx"

but just because he's got a 'fuck-all' attitude doesn't mean he fucks around with random people, he's 1. got standards and 2. living in the n109 zone?? do you THINK he can afford to let random people close just to fuck???

that being said i don't think he's a kiss virgin, just very selective and honest man when it comes to love and physical intimacy

now, when i say he isn't a fuckboy, that doesn't mean i don't believe in cocky-smugass-know-it-all sylus - he kisses well. and with PASSION. and probably the worst part is that he knows it.

first kiss with sylus? i can't imagine him making a large fuss about it like rafayel, nor it having to be some "i'm-at-deaths-door-and-need-to-kiss-you-atleast-once" situation like zayne, but no matter where or when you two share a first kiss he is making sure you remember

that being said, there was definitely a LOT of romantic and sexual tension between you and sylus for at least weeks before the kiss, i mean the air was thick with suggestive glances and denial

i think you two'd have to already be in close proximity which is very easy to achieve with sylus (touchiest man award goes to him) for the first kiss to initiate

he's grabbing your waist, or your face, makings sure your eyes are on. him. as you two kiss. watching with delight no matter what reactions you have, he admires you through surprised and flustered to confident and defiant

rather than a tender first kiss it’s probably a full blown make out session, just desire and lust flooding out of the both of you after having built up for over a month.

assertive does not mean he's going to force a kiss on you to clear this up, more that he likes to take the initiative and take control as you two kiss <3

yeah he's into biting (wow what a big shock) - likes biting your ear, or neck, or bottom lip, one time he tried nipping at your tongue too.

you can bite him back, he likes it.

"Hah, looks like someone is baring their claws tonight..." he’s really into that whole cat thing huh.

what does mr sylus do with his hands? waist, hips, ass, around your neck, pulling your face in by squeezing your cheeks, fingers threading through the hair on the back of your head, you name it he does it. again, i think sylus is a touchy man.

he doesn't mind if you try to take control, just dont expect to be successful. different to zayne - as in he will overcome your control with his evol and strength…

inappropriate use of his evol has occurred (he ‘tied’ you up and made out with you (CONSENSUALLY))

after his affinity 15 (i think) memory i can just tell he’s freaky with it bruhhh so yeah handcuffs are probably something he indulges in

if you’re persistent or physically overcome sylus you might get rewarded with a resigned, more submissive sylus

the idea or sight of someone man handling/overcoming his strength really sets him off.. i mean have you seen “no defence zone”?? but you’re really going to need to work to get him to this stage, and he’s going to have to love you

“No one’s ever seen me like this, lying on my back and begging for you.”

secretly finds out through you that he enjoys being dominated (BRAT SYLUS FOR 2024) so climb on top of him and kiss him until he’s blushing and panting hahahahahaha

tldr: sylus isn’t a fuck-boy but he sure kisses like one

AN; as an ao3 writer may say, no beta we die like caleb i wrote half of this when i was half asleep LMAOO anyways i hope this was okay please dont attack me BYE

[phantomrose96]

Sham Sacrifice

(Hi it's time for my favorite headcanon)

...

Vlad Masters sat firm and proper on the Fenton Family couch, legs crossed, teacup pinched in his fingertips, fighting subtly against the sinkhole that came with the mistake of taking Jack’s usual spot on the couch. He appeared with all the same charm and delightfulness of an ant swarm rearranging your picnic.

Danny stood at the doorway, just-still-in-the-kitchen, just not inviting himself to join the adults in the living room where Jack boomed and rambled and Vlad sat so stiff and polite and nice that his tea in his hands was going cold.

“Oh, Danny you’ll love this story—Danny, you should join us—Danny this was, what, summer of ’84? When was that heatwave, Vladdy? The one where you—”

“There’s no need to bore Daniel with the mad ravings of two old kooks, Jack. Kids would rather be off at the mall or—some store, surely. No need to stick around Daniel on my behalf. I assure you I won’t be offended if you leave.”

“No worries, V-man. I’m good right here. I love hearing Dad’s stories." Danny met Vlad's challenge, speaking with more poisonous courtesy than Vlad had proffered first. "In fact I think he should tell a few more, if he’s got more in mind.”

“In fact I do have more in mind—” Jack answered.

Neither Danny nor Vlad were listening to Jack. They held eye-contact, Danny with a stern unblinkingness of a sheepdog on duty. A lot was said without words. A lot was understood when Vlad decided to visit through the front door. Vlad only used the front door when he wanted something.

And it was never good when Vlad wanted something.

“—the core reactor project, yeah? That summer? That was in the lab with no A/C. Top floor. We were sweating like pigs, all of us. And I dared you to eat the really moldy pizza from our fridge the night before and you ralphed right into—”

“—Surely you remember this more fondly than I do. Daniel, really, you can go.”

Not a chance.

“Actually,” Danny answered, brightening some as his opportunity struck. “I am interested in this. For science class I need to write a report on the invention of an important piece of technology. I was gonna ask Mom and Dad about the Ghost Portal. And now that you’re here, I can get the whole history.”

Jack made a giddy little noise. He leaned forward, words primed, but Vlad was quicker to the draw.

“Sorry to say, your faith in me is unfounded. I wasn’t the portal guy back in college—that was always your mother and father’s passion project. I was their skeptic.”

“Bet that’s got you feeling pretty foolish right now, doesn’t it V-man?” Jack chided, a quick jab to Vlad’s ribs that nearly unseated the teacup from his suspended saucer. “Considering the fully-functioning portal right beneath our toes.”

“I hardly feel foolish, Jack. Your calculation for the portal in college was never going to work.”

“What do you mean? Of course it did.” Jack thumped the ground with his foot. “It’s running the old girl right now.”

At this, Vlad’s eyes narrowed. For the first time he’d been shaken off whatever skeezy machinations had brought him in. His pride was being challenged, and by Jack no less.

“Absolutely not. With that calculation? Absolutely not.”

“Well forget the tea biscuits Vlad, because you’re going to be eating your words in a second. Mads, hold my spot,” Jack said, as if anyone was planning to take his spot. He bounced from the couch, scooted from the living room, and vanished into the dark maw of the lab stairs, leaving only the waning beat of his footsteps behind.

His absence filled only a swallowing few seconds. The footsteps returned, bounding upward, creaking with his heavy cadence, and Jack bounced back into the room in much the manner he left. A pad of yellow lined paper was clutched in his hand. When he dropped it on the coffee table, it revealed row after row of tight scribble, churning math, carrying down the page and occupying two entire pages more that Jack flipped through.

“Same baby I came up with in college. It just needed heavier dampening and higher voltage than what we made back then. The portal downstairs has that in spades. Well, in like two-thirds of a spade.” Jack tapped something on the last line. “The projection was still only hitting 70% of the threshold we calculated to reach dimension penetration. But it’s an art, not just a science. We fired it up anyway, and it took!”

Vlad grabbed the paper pad, agitated. His eyes ran over it. Then again. Until he settled on one line, a firmness overcoming his face. He tossed the pad back onto the coffee table, and Vlad leaned back into the couch, arms crossed.

“The lambda, Jack.”

“The lambda?”

“Check it again.”

Jack did, lips pursed, pad of paper nearly swallowed in his big meaty hand.

“What about--?”

“It squares. The units don’t balance otherwise. It originates from an integration step of λ*∂λ/∂t. It squares.”

Jack’s brow remained furrowed, firm, until delight cracked into his eyes, and he let out a laugh.

“Gods, my handwriting is gonna be the death of us. Mads,” he tapped something unseen on the second page. “That’s the genius of Vladdy. Cracked this puppy wide open with just a glance. I never noticed that in all my checking. That explains the missing 30%, at least. That explains how the portal took. Lucky for you Danny that Vlad was here—”

“Jack,” Maddie said.

“—your report can have the correct formula. It’ll be—”

“—Jack—”

“—A+ worthy—”

“—Jack,” Maddie said, curt. “Lambda is the ambient ecto-energy. It’s a few ten-thousandths of a unit.”

“It—huh.”

Maddie had surfaced a pen from her pocket. She sheared a few blank pages out from the back of the pad and started the formula fresh. She made quick work of copying it over, quicker work of solving it through – lambda-squared intact.

She hit the final line and hatched a pen mark beneath the number. Jack stared, confused.

“That can’t… no.”

He repeated the same. New pages torn loose. Formula copied over, processed, line by line by line—lambda squared—by line by line by line.

Jack settled on his answer. Same as Maddie’s.

Confusion made his face tense.

“So it’s not 70% of the way to the threshold… It’s 0.013% of the way to the threshold.”

He held the pen hard, his whole body holding firm and taut as the gears turned in his head. Jack’s eyes flickered across the formula, again and again and again. He looked to Maddie, like a dog issued a command he did not understand.

“But it worked,” he said, small. “But it worked.”

Jack stood, robotic almost, eyes lost in something far away. He disappeared into the lab almost as quickly as he had a few minutes before, but now he exited with a smoothness and a quietness so very uncharacteristic of him. It bothered Danny, somewhere deep in his gut.

Maddie followed, a possession matching Jack’s.

Danny’s fingers curled and uncurled. He’d succeeded. He’s successfully interrupted Vlad’s… whatever this was. But the disquiet infected him. He didn’t like it.

“So what does that mean?” Danny asked, perhaps to Vlad. “What’s wrong with the calculation?”

Vlad sipped on tea ice cold.

“Who knows?” Vlad lied.

…

The math didn’t work.

Maddie and Jack burned through paper, burned through pencils, burned through hours.

The math didn’t work.

Clothes stuck to skin. Sweat lingered fetid and stale in the cold basement air. Exhaustion beat like a slurry through their veins.

The math didn’t work.

The portal supervised all, placidly green, the light for their table, the light for their work when the lightbulb overhead burnt clean out and neither Jack nor Maddie could be pulled away to replace it. It stood, it watched, a testament of contradiction to everything they could not solve on paper, and yet everything they built directly into the fabric of reality.

And it should never have worked.

They threw every radical what-if they’d ever conceived over 20 years of ghost research.

The ecto-ether layer.

The latent activation stitches in space fabric.

The anti-ectomatter collision proposal.

The positive-feedback crystallization theory.

And still nothing worked.

All together, every crackpot theory in their favor taken for granted, racked them up to an activation energy 200x more potent than the calculation, and still just 2% of what would be needed to rip open, and hold open, a stable fissure between their reality and the ghost zone.

Maybe by pure luck, unfathomable luck, Fentonworks basement was directly situated atop a natural portal.

Maybe that would explain ripping it open. It did nothing to explain the stability. Natural portals were unstable by definition. There and gone in a few seconds. Not hours, days, weeks, months, a year, that the Fenton Portal had been open. Never so much as faltering.

It was late. 3am ticked away to 4am, and 4:30am. The discarded paper stacked higher than Jack and Maddie both. Calluses oozed from their hands at another attempt, and another, and another.

Maddie flipped through a folder’s worth of yellowed papers, aggressively thumbed over and over after two decades left untouched. And she settled on the one she’d passed over a few dozen times already, always seeking something else, something better.

This time she unsheathed it, and she placed it on the lab table.

“…If a mouse died. In the machine. If a mouse ran through the machine and accidentally bridged two live wires, and died of violent electrocution. 500 milliamps. Instantly melted into the circuitry.”

Maddie’s mouth was cotton-dry while she wrote. Ambient ecto-energy was low. Always very, very low.

Unless something very, very bad happened to something with the capacity to become a ghost.

The numbers wove. Maddie started the formula fresh, and it was pure muscle memory. A mouse. A big mouse, even. A 99th percentile beast of a mouse. And a wire that had been wired incorrectly. Something grounded that never actually grounded. An absolutely horrific amount of electricity.

0.37%, by pure numbers. If she included every permissive crackpot idea they had thrown on top, it topped out at 6% of the needed activation threshold.

Not a mouse.

“A cat,” Jack said, words gummy, tongue dry, face tired. “If we’ve got mice down here, maybe… a stray cat wandered in. Chased the mouse.”

Maddie nodded. It didn’t matter if it made sense.

She penned it in. A large cat. A devastating electrical short. Cats carried more ecto-potential than mice did. Ecto-potential did not necessarily go up with size. It went up with complexity. The things with the most ecto-potential were the things that most became ghosts.

1.45%, by pure numbers. 18% at absolute, absolute crackpot best.

“A dog,” Jack proposed with a shaky laugh. He swallowed. “A mouse… chased by a cat… chased by a dog… all electrocuted at once”

Maddie didn’t say the thing they both knew, which was that both of them would have noticed the evidence left behind by the electrically exploded pieces of a dog.

Maddie did it anyway. A mouse and a cat and a medium-sized dog, maybe just small enough to notice no evidence of, all together. All at once. All violently ripped apart, sacrificed to a machine still asleep in its wall.

Mice did not often make ghosts. Cats did not either. Dogs, occasionally. But infrequently. Very infrequently.

37%. At best.

“Jack.”

“Maddie, I know just—maybe something really smart—”

“—Jack—”

“—like an octopus—”

“Jack.”

“I hear, maybe, pigs are smart. If it was—”

Maddie was writing, already. Not for a pig. Not an octopus. Jack watched, and he knew what the numbers meant. The ecto-potential she penned gave her away. An ecto-potential that high.

65kg, an estimate

10,000 milliamps, a catastrophic accident, a death certificate.

A human’s amount of ecto-potential.

Maddie wrote.

And she wrote.

And she did not apply a single crackpot theory, not a single discredited proposal, not an ounce of exaggeration.

138%.

Threshold, and then some.

Comfortable, easily, then some.

For the first time, after all the hundreds of times she and Jack had penned this equation over the course of 2 decades, the number met her and Jack’s threshold.

A breakthrough.

A revelation.

A pure eureka moment.

Jack and Maddie were silent.

Alone in a humming basement. Alone with only the soft swirls of the portal for company, happy, stable, purring its contentment, singing to the cold air.

“It has to be something else,” Maddie said. And she said it weakly. And she said it childishly.

“You’re right. It can’t be this,” Jack echoed. “If someone died down here, we’d know. Dead bodies don’t walk away. We’d have seen it. O-or even if, if the body got stuck in the portal, we’d have heard of someone going missing.”

Maddie sat, quiet. A thought held her mind hostage.

“Unless they didn’t go missing,” Maddie said, and she said it barely audibly. “Unless the portal spit them right back out.”

“Then—that’s what I said—a dead body, on the floor, we’d have seen.”

“Not a dead body.”

“It had to be lethal, Mads—”

“I know Jack. But if they died, here, in the portal Jack, then their ghost did not get ripped away from the body and sent to the Ghost Zone. …They ripped the Ghost Zone here.” Palms slick with sweat smoothed over her notes. She pointed to one specific line and found her pen tip trembled no matter how badly she stabilized it. “The ecto-potential of a creature is how strong of a pull their ghost creates on the Ghost Zone. A strong enough pull means the ghost can reach the Ghost Zone and stabilize, like a fish reeling itself up, yeah? We agree on this Jack, yes?”

“Yes,” Jack answered.

“It’s what makes the math even work, Jack. Someone dying in the portal didn’t reel themselves to the boat. They reeled the boat in. Jack, they brought the Ghost Zone here…” Maddie wasn’t breathing right. She pulled sweat-soaked bangs away from her face. “Their ghost never left their body Jack. They died, Jack. And they walked back out.”

“…No. No,” Jack said. “No, they didn’t.”

“Then what?” Maddie asked.

Jack stared. He looked away. He didn’t like the expression on Maddie’s face.

“It—what about the ecto-ether theory?” Jack said, of the theory they’d tested and retested and tested all over, all night. He grabbed his pencil back up and pointed it aimlessly at Maddie’s piece of paper, pointed end out in self-defense. “If the ecto-ether is maybe… if it’s only 250-times stronger than we calculated. Then it could…”

Jack’s voice died. His pencil hung idle. Maddie’s paper remained unblemished.

“If it… was a pig,” Jack offered. “If it was a pig that died in the portal.”

“How, Jack? How would a pig get in? We lock all the doors at night, Jack. No one else can get in, Jack. It’s just us, Jack.”

Jack and Maddie were not there when the portal turned on.

Maddie’s statement carried two possibilities. Only two. Both felt like claws digging all the flesh right out of Jack’s heart.

“I want… I want to try the ecto-ether theory again,” Jack choked. “I think it’s the ecto-ether. I think it’ll work.”

Jack slid a piece of paper over, already covered in scribbles. In its single untouched corner, he started the equation for the several-thousandth time that night.

Above their head, birds were singing.

Sunrise hailed unseen from the windowless laboratory.

…

At 6am, Vlad answered his cell phone. The reception crackled, struggling through the layers of sheetrock above his head.

“Vlad?” Maddie’s voice crackled. “Sorry, did I wake you up?”

“Not at all my dear.” Vlad leaned his weight against the wall, playing with the singsong melody in his voice. “But you sound exhausted. Is anything the matter?”

“Yes. Well… Yes. Jack and I have—all night—trying to fix the equation.”

“Naturally.”

“We found something that maybe works.”

“Oh?” Vlad asked. He straightened, pacing now, cracklingly attentive. “And what might that—”

“If someone died. Activating the portal. We have an on-switch inside the portal’s interior. The trigger we use to press it is external to the portal, of course. But if someone went inside the portal, and they pressed it directly, and if they died, and pulled the Ghost Zone here—”

Vlad’s red eyes reflected pools of iridescent green. He twirled his free hand in the fringes of his cape, tongue working over the fanged edges of his teeth. He stared, consumed, forward.

“—and just, you, I was thinking, you’re the only other expert I’d trust to… maybe weigh in.”

“What does Jack think?”

“He denies it. He’s still. He’s trying other theories.”

“Well who knows, surely? The answer may lie somewhere you haven’t looked.”

“…I’ve looked everywhere, Vlad. That's the thing. There is no more ‘somewhere else’. I’ve looked.”

“You sound like your mind is made up.”

“I just… if maybe you have some idea.”

“Am I meant to talk you out of this idea?”

“Vlad.”

“Do you think I have some secret information you don’t? Sorry to say, I’m just your skeptic.” Some noise came through muffled from the other side. Vlad flashed a smile. “But…as your skeptic I will offer you this—It all sounds a bit absurd, doesn’t it? To kill someone and have them come back intact and… for you to never notice? Who would they be? How would they be? Surely not human anymore, surely. How would you never notice?”

Vlad paced forward, booted feet clicking along his laboratory floor.

“It would be ridiculous,” he continued, with a building crescendo, “so unfathomably self-centered surely, to not notice something like that befall someone so close to you, who died at the hands of your own invention? …If I’m correctly inferring who, in your household, you suspect of having activated the portal?” Vlad’s tongue lingered along his teeth.

Maddie’s line held, quiet. And the seconds of static drew long.

“Ah, apologies. I’ve overstepped,” Vlad continued. “I meant this as a vote of confidence in you. You and Jack both. Two people as attentive, caring, compassionate as yourselves. You would notice. I promise.”

“You’re… Okay, thank you, Vlad. I appreciate it.”

“Is there anything else, my dear?”

“No. No. Thank you, Vlad. I’ll think about this.”

Maddie’s line clicked dead. A chuckle built to Vlad’s lips and he let his head tip back with mirth. It lasted only a moment. He stowed his phone. And as if the interruption had never happened, Vlad reaffixed his attention on his own portal swirling in front of him. It bathed him, swimming green, purring contentment.

And Vlad vanished into his portal.

(Chapter 2)

[insidekatmind]

Share- Levi Colwill x reader x Jude Bellingham (love triangle)

Wearning: +18,smut

You are at a time in your life when the attention on you has become overwhelming. and everything started unexpectedly. You have always been a quiet person, far from drama and emotional complications. Yet, here you are, involved in a love triangle between Jude Bellingham and Levi Colwill. It’s clear that both of them do not intend to give up.

It all started a few months earlier, at an exclusive party hosted by a mutual friend. The music was loud, the lights were dim, and you had no idea that your life would change that night.You were at the bar sipping a cocktail when Jude came over with his disarming smile and self-confident look.

"I’ve never seen you at a party like this. You’re one of those people who likes to stay in the shadows, am I right?" He had said it in a tone that felt like defiance.

You laughed, trying to hide the blush that was coloring your cheeks. "I prefer not to draw too much attention. I’m not really... used to it."

"Well, tonight you’ll be in the middle of mine," he replied, raising his glass towards you.

You couldn’t deny that Jude had a magnetic charm. You spent the evening chatting, discovering a side of him that went beyond the footballer: a brilliant, ambitious but also surprisingly sweet boy.

Yet, just as you were starting to feel comfortable, someone else had caught your attention.

Levi Colwill had made his way through the crowd with the calm of one who does not need to hurry to be noticed. He was different from Jude: less cheeky, more mysterious. When he saw you, he approached discreetly, waiting for the right moment to talk to you.

"Is he already boring you?" he said, pointing to Jude with a nod. "What?" you asked, surprise.

"Bellingham. He has a reputation for talking too much," he added with a grin that made you shiver.

"And you? Are you one of those who speaks little and listens a lot?" you answered, amused.

"Something like that," he said, with a look that seemed to be light inside.

From that moment on, your attention was divided. Both boys seemed determined to win you over, each in their own way. Jude was spontaneous, passionate, always ready to make you laugh. Levi, on the other hand, was reflective, profound, capable of turning even a trivial conversation into something special.

In the days and weeks that followed, Jude and Levi had begun to become more and more present in your life.

One afternoon, Jude had shown up to your house on a motorbike. "Let’s go for a ride. I want to show you the city like you’ve never seen it before."

You could not say no, and that afternoon turned into an unforgettable adventure, among laughter and breathtaking views.

But just when you thought Jude had won an important point, Levi made his move. One evening, he invited you to an impromptu dinner at his house. He had cooked for you, and the way he looked at you as you spoke made you feel special in a way that you couldn’t explain.

Every moment with one of them seemed like a balancing act, a step forward for one and a step back for the other.

Things had exploded when, during a dinner you decided not to attend to take time to think about it, the two ended up arguing.

"Do you really think you have a chance with her?" said Jude, raising his voice. "She wants someone who knows how to amuse her, who knows how to live. Not one who spends time as a philosopher."

"Ah, really?" Levi replied, keeping a calm tone but visibly irritated. "Because it seems to me that she’s looking for someone who really understands her. And, honestly, it’s not you."

The words became increasingly sharp, until the two almost clashed physically. Mutual friends had intervened to separate them, but the tension was palpable.

The next day you were sitting on a park bench, the sun filters through the leaves of the trees and warms your face. You shake your phone, a little bored, when you get a message.

Jude: "Are you free tonight? I thought I’d take you somewhere you’d like to go."

You smile lightly, aware of his attempt to win you over. You do not respond in time, that another notification surprises you.

Levi: "I’ll pick you up in an hour. I won’t take no for an answer."

You’re wide-eyed, you incredulous. But are they in agreement? you ask. The situation amuses you, but it also makes you difficult. It is not easy to juggle between the insistence of two guys so charming and, above all, so competitive.

---

You’re sitting at a table in an elegant restaurant. Levi is standing in front of you, his dark eyes fixed on yours. He wears a white shirt with a slight button-down that lets you see his skin and the tuatuaggi on his right arm that made him irresistible. He smiles with that confidence which he knows to be his best weapon.

"So, did you have fun with Bellingham the other day?" asks, bringing the glass of wine to his lips.Raise an eyebrow, surprised by her direct question.

"Are you jealous, Colwill?" you reply provocatively.He laughs, shaking his head.

"Jealous? No, just curious. I want to see if he has a chance against me."

You stop for a moment, his gaze is penetrating, but you do not give in. You are aware of your power in this situation.

"Maybe he does. Or maybe not. It depends on who is smarter." you reply with a mischievous smile. Levi bites his lip, visibly amused by your challenge.

"Oh, so you’re challenging me? Are you sure you want to play with me?"

"I never play, Levi. And you know it."

His smile widens. "I like it even more."

---

The next day, Jude invites you to his house. When you arrive, he welcomes you with the usual bright smile. He wears a gray sweatshirt and sweatpants, a simple but incredibly attractive look on him.

"You’re finally here. I was beginning to think that Levi had kidnapped you." he says jokingly.He laughs, shaking his head.

"Don’t worry, I’m too smart to be caught." You reply with a playful smile.Jude looks at you for a moment, his gaze becomes more serious.

"I know. And maybe that’s what I like about you." he admits, getting a few steps closer.

You feel your heart racing, but not receding. He is so close that you can smell his fresh and enveloping scent.

"Don’t think you can have me just because you tell me to." You answer with a confident voice.

"I don’t think so. But I know I do." He answers, and his eyes won’t come off of yours.

---

The days pass and the tension between Levi and Jude becomes more evident. It all starts with small comments thrown at a distance, but soon the jokes turn into provocative looks. During a party you’ve been invited to, you find them both there, and the situation becomes explosive.

"What a coincidence to see you here, Bellingham." says Levi with a provocative smirk.

"Yeah, you here too, Colwill? I thought you were busy losing games." Jude replied, keeping the tone calm but sharp. You look at them with your arms folded.

"Are you serious?" you ask, tired of their teasing.

Levi approaches you, moving a lock of hair behind your ear.

"I’m just protecting what’s mine," he says, looking into your eyes.

"Yours? Don’t get confused, Colwill." You counter, and he laughs softly. Jude steps forward, his eyes on Levi.

"She’s nobody’s, dude. And you should remember that." said Jude looking at him badly.

The two stare for a moment. You know that things could get out of hand, but you decide to intervene.

"Stop it! I’m not a trophy. If you keep acting like this, you’ll both lose." You say in a firm tone and leave them alone.

The two continued to watch while Levi watched with a calm that was making Jude angry. "Who wins the best," said Jude, and Levi looked at him amused and then left.

---

It was a few days and you decided to go to the disco alone to get your ideas, It was one of those evenings where the atmosphere seemed magical from the beginning. You were in the elegant nightclub in the heart of London, immersed in a vortex of soft lights and pulsating music.

You were trying to distract yourself from the events of these days by not thinking about how Levi and Jude kept coming at you and how they always fought over you.

The DJ had just started playing a hypnotic mix of house and reggaeton, and you couldn’t help but let yourself go to the beat. You wore a dress that perfectly embraced every curve, attracting admiring glances wherever you went, but what really caught the eye was your energy. You danced with an innate sensuality, without any effort, as if the music ran in your blood.

At one point, you feel a burning gaze on you. You turn slowly and cross the gaze of Levi, he looked at you with an intensity that made you hold your breath. He waves a little glass at you, and your heart quickened. Before you can answer, you notice another pair of eyes staring at you: Jude Bellingham. He was on the opposite side of the dance floor, leaning nonchalantly against the bar. When your looks meet, his smile widens, and he slowly approaches, moving through the crowd with magnetic security.

You don’t have time to think. The music changes, becoming slower and more sensual, and Levi takes the first step. He approaches with a mischievous smile, tilting his head.

"Y/n as always I can’t do at least not notice you" he says, his deep voice barely overtaken by the music. "Let’s dance?"

You don’t have time to answer that you feel a warm hand on your back. You turn around, facing Jude. He is even more beautiful up close, with his dark eyes that seem to read your soul.

"Levi, you’re too slow," says Jude with a provocative smile. "She dance with me tonight."

You find yourself between two fires, but instead of choosing, you decide to have fun. "Who said I should choose one?" Answer, with a smirk that leaves both speechless.

The music picks up and you start moving, letting go completely. Levi comes to you from behind, his hands just above your hips, while Jude watches you from the front, his body coming closer and closer to yours. They dance in tune, their bodies following your movements with perfect precision. It’s thrilling, almost surreal to be the center of their attention.

As Levi touches your neck with a light kiss, you feel a shiver running down your back. " So beautiful" he murmurs, his voice so close that you can’t hear it. You let go for a moment, head tilting to the side to offer him more space and start rubbing more on his cock. But as soon as you close your eyes, feel Jude’s hands on your life.

You look up at him, and he looks at you with a determination that takes your breath away. " I waited long enough," he says, before bending down and capturing your lips in an intense, passionate kiss. His mouth is hot, and the way he holds you makes you lose your sense of time and space. Levi, however, does not back down. He keeps kissing your neck, his hands holding you tight against him as he also began to rub his cock on your ass making you moan in Jude’s kiss

The minutes seem to stop. The dance floor around you fades away, leaving you alone in a world of music, soft lights and pure electricity. When you finally break away from Jude, your eyes meet those of Levi. His gaze is a mixture of desire and challenge.

"We’re not done with you yet," he whispers.

Smile, your heart beating wildly. "I don’t mind," you reply excited.

Jude and Levi exchanged a smile without arguing for the first time. You all three went outside and looked around.

The night air was fresh as you left the disco, still immersed in the adrenaline of the evening. Levi takes the keys to his black sports car, with a confident smile that left no room for doubt. " The evening doesn’t end here," he says, opening the door for you with a gallant gesture. You can’t help but smile as you step into the car, sitting in the back seat.

Jude follows you, closing the door behind him. Before Levi starts the engine, Jude looks at you with a breath-holding intensity. "Are you sure you can hold us?" whispers to you, his voice a mixture of fun and desire. His hand touches yours, and you feel a shiver running down your back.

"We’ll see," you reply with a mischievous smile, knowing full well that you have no intention of backing away.

Levi turns slightly from the driver’s seat, looking through the rear-view mirror with a smirk. "Be comfortable behind, huh? No distractions while driving." But the spark in his eyes betrays his tone. The engine starts, and the car starts moving, gliding smoothly through the streets lit by street lamps.

While Levi is focused on driving, Jude does not waste time. He comes closer to you, his warm breath against your skin. " Do you know how hard it is to ignore you?" he whispers, her lips touching your neck. He starts kissing you slowly, with a deliberate sweetness that makes you shiver. His hands find your side, the touch light but possessive. Every kiss is like a spark that ignites a fire within you.

You try to stay calm, but the feeling of his lips and hands makes you close your eyes and tilt your head slightly to give him more space. Jude smiles at your skin.

"You like it, don’t you?" he whispers in his low, satisfying voice. You don’t answer, but the way your body reacts is all he needs to know.

From the driver’s seat, Levi raises a hand to adjust the rear-view mirror, looking at you with an accessory smile. " If I keep feeling that way, I might have to pull over," he jokes, but the

tone is loaded with subtext. " It’s not safe to drive with you guys distracting me like this."

"You drive," Jude replies, without even taking my attention away from you. "I’m just taking care of her."

You laugh slowly, trying to regain control of the situation, but it’s impossible with Jude so close. " Maybe you should focus on the road, Levi," you say in an innocent tone that contrasts the fire you feel inside.

Levi chuckles and shakes his head. "Oh, I’m thinking about it. But trust me, I can’t wait to get home to join the fun."

His words make you beat faster, and the journey to his home seems to last an eternity, every second of tension. Jude continues to kiss your neck, his touch becoming bolder, his hands touching the edge of your dress. Finally, Levi parks in front of an elegant modern house with large windows reflecting the city lights.

"Welcome," says Levi, getting out of the car and opening the door for you. His look is calm but full of promises. "We enter. The evening has just begun."

You look around for a moment, then Jude takes your hand and guides you to the entrance. Levi opens the door and lets you in first, the house lit by a warm and welcoming light. You turn to them, your heart beating like a bat.

Levi reaches you in a few steps, his confident smile makes you feel your heart beat faster. He comes slowly, his eyes seem to study you every moment, as if he is waiting for the perfect moment.

When he finally bends over to you, feel his hands gently leaning against your hips as his lips meet yours in a warm and passionate kiss.

Levi kisses with a confidence that overwhelms you. His hands are just tighter, as if to make sure you don’t go away, but you have no intention of doing so. You raise your arms and walk around her neck, pulling it closer to you as if there is still too much space between you. The warmth of his body against yours is electrifying, and the way he kisses you makes you lose any sense of time.

As you let go completely, you feel a movement behind you. Open your eyes for a moment and notice Jude coming slowly. His gaze is intense, and never turns away from you two. The way he walks, with that innate confidence, raises tension in the air. He says nothing, but the energy that emanates speaks clearly: he does not intend to stay on the sidelines.

Levi detaches himself slightly from you, just for a moment, his eyes meeting with yours as he smiles complicit. " Don’t think you’ve escaped me so easily," he whispers, his voice low and full of desire.

Levi starts kissing your neck while you moan slowly. Jude comes down behind you and lifts the dress that had made him crazy all evening and took off your underwear to then begin to kiss your thighs and you closed your eyes at the touch moaning slowly.

Levi smiled at your neck and Jude smiled at your thigh and then stuck a finger in your folds and you moaned.

Levi looks at you as he starts to pull down the shoulder strap of your dress and moves your bra while he starts to kiss your breast while Jude decides to insert his tongue into your pussy.

"Shit" you moaned as you put your hand on Levi’s hair as you watched him suck your breasts.

"So good this pussy" grunted Jude near your pussy and that made you moan again and you started rubbing your pussy on his face making him moan as he kept eating it like a hungry man.

You felt in heaven: Levi was playing with your breasts and kissing your neck while Jude was eating your pussy.

Jude was kissing your pussy and you spat on his face and he moans licking your cum while you moaned.

When he broke off, he gave him a last kiss and then got up. Levi was still kissing your neck and playing with your tits while you kept moaning.

You turned your head a little to look at Jude and moaned as he was hot with your cum in his face and his mouth open a bit while he tried to catch his breath.

"You taste so good," Jude muttered as he kissed, and you groaned as you pulled her hair.

Levi does not give you time to think. With a smile that promises all sorts of temptation, he takes your hand and guides you through the corridor of his house, with Jude following you closely. The lights are low, and every step seems to amplify the electricity flowing between you three. You find yourself in front of the door to Levi’s room, and he pushes it slowly, revealing an intimate and welcoming environment, dominated by a large bed with dark and soft sheets.

Before you can speak, Levi grabs you by the hips and pulls you against him. Her lips settle back on your neck, exploring every inch with a deliberate slowness that makes you shiver. " I can’t stop thinking how irresistible you are," he whispers against your skin, his deep voice vibrating in your ears. His hands come down on your hips, clenching lightly as to emphasize his grip upon you.

You let go at the moment, your breath getting shorter as her lips descend towards the base of your neck. You raise your hands and walk through his dark hair, pulling him even closer to you, as if you want to hear every movement. "Levi..." Whispers, but the words are lost in the pleasure it causes you.

Jude, who had been watching with a mixture of impatience and desire, approaches with a determined pace. " Don’t forget about me," he says, his voice charged with a slight challenge. He stops beside you, his gaze that moves between you and Levi, before resting definitively on you. His hand lifts up to touch your face, and then it comes down your shoulder, the warm and enveloping touch.

Levi stops for a moment, lifting his head from your neck to look at Jude. "I have no intention of keeping it all to myself," he says with a smile that is both complicit and cheeky. Then he looks at you, his eyes shining with desire. "Are you ready for this?" asks you, his voice low and full of promises.

You cannot answer with words, but the way you clasp against him is sufficient. Jude moves beside you, his body approaching to touch yours, while Levi starts kissing your neck with increasing passion. The room fills with tension, every moment that passes makes you forget everything.

Both of them hurry to strip off. Revealing their long, thick and hard cocks. You moaned as you looked at their dicks and how big they were. You couldn’t stop looking at their dick.

The two of them noticed and smiled. Jude started touching his cock as he looked at you "Don’t worry baby girl we’ll make you feel good". Jude said as Levi began to take off your dress and bra, and as he did so he was biting your neck and you groaned.

When he finished taking off your dress, Levi slapped your butt and made you groan and Jude smiled at the sight of how sexy you were as you moaned.

You come to them and kneel before them and hummed happily as they saw their cock was close to your face.

"Open this beautiful mouth," says Jude in a roaring voice as he lifts his chin and grabs the end of his cock, taking it to your mouth.

When you open your mouth, he enters gently while you swirl your tongue around him enjoying the salty pre-cum. Jude grabs a handful of hair and pulls it slightly to help him guide himself further into your mouth. Hitting the bottom of your throat with tears in your eyes as it pushes back and forth in your mouth. She moans about how good you are and bites her lip as you look at it.

Jude slowly pulls his cock out of your mouth leaving you with an empty mouth, while Levi approaches and smiles at you.

You opened your mouth and slowly slid his big cock into your mouth. He grabs your back and without warning, he puts his dick in the bottom of your throat and slightly gags you.

He moves his hips while his cock continues to abuse the back of your throat. He looks at you and grunts "this beautiful mouth is made to suck my cock". Hearing these words you wept.

He pulls out of your mouth, while a small sliver of saliva follows his cock.

You looked at both of them with desire as they came a little closer to you as they started touching their dick while they were looking at you and grunting and you moaned along with them feeling even more wet.

"Shit, I’m going to cum," said Jude, touching her cock faster and Levi nodded in agreement as he looked at you and kept touching his dick.

"Open that beautiful mouth for us, baby," said Levi and you nodded in obedience.

You opened your mouth and pulled out your tongue while both Levi and Jude spilled on your tongue and the cum also fell on your tits and the rest of your body.

You moaned upon hearing the semen of both your beautiful mouth and they groaned at sight. " So sexy" said Jude grunting and Levi nodded without taking his eyes off you.

Levi and Jude help you to get up and guide you on the bed.

"Lie down for us, darling" Levi muttered and you obeyed and the two smiled.

"What a good girl," said Jude, approaching you and bending over to kiss you.

His hands slide along your naked body and you moaned as he felt his warm hands on your body.

Jude moves away to look down on you and then comes back to you and kisses you passionately.

His tongue explores your mouth, while his hands rest on your waist caressing your skin gently, while you slide your fingers through his hair pulling his breath heavier.

Levi meanwhile caresses your thighs and spreads your legs to get close to your pussy. He kisses the inside of your thighs with sensuality and passion as he approaches your folds, while you can feel his warm breath touching your clitoris and groan in Jude’s mouth.

Levi licked a strip on your folds, making you emit a slight whimper. He laid a gentle kiss on your clitoris before wrapping his tongue around it and gently sucking it. Use slow movements to tease you and make you wiggle and whimper.

He wraps his hands under your thighs to prevent you from moving too much. While you kissed Jude you moaned while Levi kept poking your pussy.

He leaves without a word and you have slowly detached yourself from Jude to look at Levi with despair.

"Please Levi don’t stop" you whimpered as you watched and could swear that his dick got even harder at that connection.

Without saying anything he dives again in your pussy as it starts to eat you. It was like this man had starved to death and the only thing he wanted was your pussy.

Jude smiles at your reaction as you arch your back while I lift it continues to eat you.

Jude begins to bite your neck leaving more marks as he sucks your skin. Meanwhile Levi’s tongue moves faster around your clitoris, slipping two fingers into your entrance and curling it in a provocative way.

Jude grabbed your boob and touched your nipple while sucking the other. Levi has slipped another finger to curl it in the perfect spot, you have gripped Levi’s hair hard making him groan against you.

Pleasure flowed through your body as his tongue swirled around your clitoris, as moans filled the room.

You started screaming as you felt how good it was making you feel as you felt your body tremble.

You spat on Levi’s face and he kept licking your juices while you yelled for overstimulation.

When he broke off, he had a smug smile that made you even more wet and you kissed him.

Jude takes you and rides him by letting his big throbbing cock enter your pussy hole making you moan as you clung to his back.

Jude motioned to Levi to go after you and Levi shove his dick into your asshole making you scream.

The two boys moaned as they heard your walls clenching their big dicks.

"Warn us if it becomes too much" whispered Levi too much in ecstasy feeling as you were squeezing him and Jude nodded closing his eyes trying not to move the hips already.

You nodded and they began to move while all three of you started to groan. Levi starts pushing slowly, before increasing the pace and making his pushes deeper and stronger. Jude pushes from below causing friction as he placed his hands on your hips to guide his movements.

Their movements become faster making you scream moans of pleasure. Levi while pushing his cock harder inside you started licking and sucking your neck and you moaned even louder.

"You’re making me feel so good" you moaned as you lowered your body towards Jude’s and he took advantage of that to take a cowl in your mouth while taking both their dicks.

"Baby girl you’re doing great, you’re making us feel like in heaven" Levi whispered near your ear as he slapped you on the butt making you groan and make you tighten their dicks more.

"This pussy is made to take our dicks," said Jude, taking a powder off your tit and then retaking the assault. You groaned as you moved faster wanting to take more of their dicks.

You moaned as they grunted and pushed their cock deeper inside you. Levi made your back bow more to make their cocks go deeper inside you and you moaned loudly as they both hit your g-spot.

"I’m going to cum" you said while moaning.

"Come baby girl" moaned Jude as he started to hit even harder and you moaned as they were about to come too. You could feel their cocks contracting inside you as you came to your orgasm. Levi cum in the ass while Jude cum in your pussy.You screamed loud as you felt full. " So beautiful" you whimpered as Levi gently pulled himself out of you and gave you a kiss on the butt, back and jaw then give you a sweet kiss on the cheek and you smiled.

You slowly got up from the dick of Jude and then lay down on the bed trying to take area and Jude caressed your hair gently and then gave you sweet kisses on the cheek.

Levi came back with a cloth while with the help of Jude they cleaned and pampered you.

You found yourself hugging Jude and Levi as they whispered sweet words and praise for how well you did.

You felt your legs tremble and had a sore throat but were satisfied by these two men lying next to you.

[thinkinonsense]

Francesca

old!logan howlett x fem!reader

cw: angst, mentions of death, sad logan, a bit of fluff

wc: 800+

a/n: not sure if this will be the last part of the mini-series or not. i think i'll only add more if im inspired. i have a new mini-series idea for old man!logan so be on the lookout for that in a week or so.

hozier mini-series masterlist

-ˋˏ ༻❁✿❀༺ ˎˊ-

Logan had lost a lot in his life. He watched people he cared about die right before his eyes; the ultimate curse of living such a long life. Everyone he loved had to go at some point, and for the most part, he accepted that until you entered his life.

He did everything he could to ensure your safety, and for the most part, it worked. The only place where you weren't protected was in his nightmares.

Ever since you two met, the nightmares appear less and less but they also never fully disappear either. Logan still wakes up in cold sweats and haunting images of your bloody body dead in his arms.

"Hey! Hey! I'm alright, honey." You whispered in an attempt to bring him back to reality. "I'm here. I'm right here."

The only thing that helps him calm down is when you place one of his hands over your heart; skin to skin, feeling your heartbeat pulse and knowing that you are indeed alive and lying next to him.

Logan's heavy breathing eases after a few moments. He carefully wraps you into his arms, placing you on his chest. You knew in times like these that Logan needed to feel you.

"No one's going to hurt me." You assure him.

"We don't know for sure..." He sighs. "and I can't risk that."

"I know for sure. You know how I am so certain that no one will hurt me?" You don't allow time for Logan to answer. Your fingers lace themselves with his, bringing this hand up to his and softly placing kisses over the slits in between his knuckles. "Because I feel safest with you and these claws are part of the reason why."

Logan wasn't one to blush or feel all mushy deep inside himself but those little kisses amazed him. He admired your kindness and patience towards him. It took him forever to understand how you did it.

"Sorry for waking you up, princess." He says, trailing his fingertips up and down your back. "Didn't mean to scare ya'."

"Do you honestly think I scare that easily?" Your light giggle almost makes Logan smile.

"Guess not." He shrugs, admiring how a sliver of moonlight catches on your face. "But in any other normal relationship you wouldn't have to deal with this bullshit-"

"Hey!" You whisper, springing up to fully face him now, soft hands holding each side of his face. "This isn't bullshit."

"It is, sweetheart." Logan sighs. "I'm selfish."

"How are you selfish?"

"Because you deserve to live a long life with someone who won't damn you."

"I don't care if you damn me!" Your voice raised, not in anger but in passion. "I love you. I love all of you. When they cut me open someday that's all they will find; my love for you pouring from inside of me."

Logan pulls you impossibly closer, afraid of you slipping away. His heart pounded with love; beating solely for your existence.

"Heaven couldn't house a love like ours."

There's a heaviness in your heart as you look into Logan's hazel eyes. even after all these years, it broke your heart that Logan always felt like you were made of sand. sure, you weren't a mutant like him but you wouldn't go down without a fight. he's always afraid that someone from his past will come for revenge and you'll be the one to pay for it.

"I don't want you to be so worried, lo.." you whisper, thumb soothing the salt and pepper beard that's bloomed over the last few days. "when my time comes, I don't want you to feel responsible for it."

Death was always a sensitive topic for both of you. your death, more specifically because someday it will come no matter if either of you is ready or not. Logan doesn't think he can live without you; you tell him that he's survived before you and will survive after you. he doesn't believe you.

"I've waited all my life for you. every agonizing, torturous moment brought me to you." his voice starts to strain. "now, you are all I have left to live for... so, when you're gone, babydoll, I won't be far behind you."

Tears roll down your cheek. overwhelmed with love and fear because you can't stop Logan from taking his own life if you die. he lays you back down on his chest carefully.

Logan had seen everything the world had to offer him; most of it was utter shit until he was graced with your presence. all he wanted to do with the rest of his life was shield you from all of the horrid darkness he had seen. you were too pure and he intended to keep you far away from it all, for as long as the two of you walked this earth.

[avelera]

(Arcane Meta) Zaun Died with Silco

I want to open this by saying I understand people who are upset that there isn't more Piltover/Zaun conflict and resolution in S2 of Arcane. However, I'm going to argue here that the reason it's not in S2 after 2.03 is because the conflict is over. Piltover won. There is no more Zaun anymore as a potential political player and, ultimately, this comes back to haunt Piltover in their hour of need.

Overall, while I am invested in the Piltover/Zaun conflict, especially in S1, I'm less focused on Caitlyn and Vi's story which is our main lens for the conflict, or rather the end of the conflict, in S2. Still, I hope to offer my more Arcane worldbuilding-focused perspective. And just to get it out of the way, here are a few things I had trouble with:

I too was puzzled that anyone from the Undercity would join Piltover in the defense of the city.

I also thought it was strange to have Jayce focus on the threat that Viktor posed with his robots while soliciting help from the undercity, instead of on Ambessa, the more clear and understandable threat that would have made a better rallying point and allowed for a final discussion about the Noxian occupation of the undercity and how Noxus turning on Piltover was just them reaping what they sowed.

I was certainly taken aback when everyone was given Enforcer uniforms for the final fight.

That said, I believe there are answers to all three of these. From there, I want to dive into what exactly happened in S2 with Piltover vs. Zaun, to my eyes. Short version: there is no more "Zaun" as a potential nation or political player by 2.03 when the Chem Barons are taken out by Cait's forces, but it really died before that with Silco, who was already in a precarious negotiating situation himself and he knew it.

Very few people from the Undercity joined Piltover's defense of the city. Maybe a half dozen. I felt that was our moment of "you reap what you sow" for Piltover. A few passionate idealists who could see the bigger picture that saving Piltover does mean saving the undercity joined, but there were no hordes of volunteers. Piltover had lost the right to them and was substantially weakened for it.

Jayce choosing to focus on Viktor as the threat makes sense for him, but it was a poor political move and probably lost him volunteers he would have otherwise gained. The robot army threat is too esoteric and fantastical. "The Noxians turned on us and plan to conquer the city," is a threat that would have been better for rallying the troops, Jayce is just too single-minded to think of it. He's a bad politician.

The Enforcer uniforms are an odd sour note, but they do make sense as protective gear. Piltover doesn't have an army. There are no uniforms to give people. All they have is Enforcer uniforms. It is an odd note symbolically, but practically speaking it shows how little time Piltover had to prepare. Piltover is a civilian city going up against a military force like Noxus. They are woefully underprepared and really only have their status as defender in urban fighting to give them a prayer of even stalling the Noxian forces. Ironically, Piltover's only hope against Noxus mirrors Zaun's only hope against Piltover if they had gone to war: the difficult nature of urban fighting against an entrenched, motivated opponent on their home turf.

Now, to get into, "What happened to the overall Piltover vs. Zaun fight?" I get why people think it's lacking in S2, and I get why people find it horrifying that there is no independent Zaun at the end, all we've got is Sevika with one seat on the Council, as far as we can tell but I would point out:

Zaun is dead at this point. It's been dead since 2.03. Arguably, it really died with Silco.

As Jinx said, she didn't just destroy her own family, she cursed an entire society when she launched that rocket into the Council Chamber.

Here's the thing, Jayce was actually right when he said Zaun wouldn't stand a chance in an outright war with Piltover.

Yes, Zaun has a lot of brawlers. They have Shimmer and the Shimmer berserkers.

But Zaun doesn't have any sort of organized fighting force beyond the guards of individual Chem Barons and their factories.

What Zaun has is the fissures. It has ugly, difficult urban fighting in dangerous spaces. But as a counter to that, we have the fact that their ventilation is controlled from Piltover. In a true all-out war, Piltover could in theory just flush out the entire undercity using the Gray. Having your infrastructure entirely dependent on an enemy oppressor is what I would call a "fatal flaw" in any defensive military strategy, particularly when what they can cut off is the air you breathe. That's easily game over right there unless Silco has a way to circumvent that.

In a guerilla war, Zaun could probably hold out for a long, grinding, ugly civil war made up of mostly guerrilla attacks, in which a great number of innocent civilians will die, even in an all-out conflict with Piltover. But it would suffer catastrophic losses and probably still lose in the end.

Now, Jayce is I think somewhat naive in his claim Zaun doesn't stand a chance. Maybe Zaun wouldn't stand a chance in the long run, but they'd make Piltover pay for every inch with blood. They'd grind Piltover down into a shadow of its former self, force them to sacrifice all of their principles. To some extent, I think Jayce gets that, he gets that he doesn't want more kids to die, but I think even he underestimates just how ugly that war would be and how long it would go and how unrecognizable his Piltover would be by then.

The moment that gives Silco pause in Jayce's assessment of how easily Zaun would be crushed isn't the fighting. Silco is pretty confident that they could make Piltover pay and he's arguably looking forward to the chance on some level.

What gives him pause is when Jayce says the Council doesn't care.

To some extent, Silco like any revolutionary against an oppressive "civilized" society (heavy, heavy emphasis on the air quotes there) is that a certain point, Piltover is so soft-hearted they will get tired of the bloodshed.

What Jayce just told Silco is that the Council is more barbaric than even Silco maybe appreciated, for all their vaunted principles. There isn't necessarily a limit to how many Zaunite children will die before Piltover decides to cease hostilities. Knowing what Silco knows of Piltover's brutality, I think that is a sobering moment for Silco. That's when he decides this really is the best time to negotiate.

(Aside, this is by the way where Vi is wrong about Silco, driven by her emotions. Silco is willing to set aside the feud to get his nation of Zaun, he can be negotiated with. He's just not willing to give up his daughter (something Vi can't possibly understand at this point).)

Here's why it's the best time for Silco to negotiate and it ties into everything else:

Without Shimmer, which has been severely hampered by the raid on the factory, Zaun doesn't have anything to counter Hextech.

Jinx's wild attacks against Piltover has helped put the pressure on them that Silco capitalizes on. But it is a paper-thin threat. She is a lone albeit devastating terrorist. She makes Zaun appear more dangerous than it is but that can't last forever. Silco has leveraged her attacks into a pressure campaign against Piltover, but a serious response from Piltover (as seen in 2.03 with the strike team corners and very nearly captures her) could reveal just how fragile that threat is.

Basically, Zaun has some champions, arguably a league of legends lol, but it doesn't have an army. It doesn't even have Enforcers of its own. It doesn't have a concerted force of any kind.

The money is running out. As "Sucker" shows us in 2.02, each Chem Baron that gets taken out means less money on the table, and we're down 2 by the beginning of S2 with Silco and Finn, who arguably both fell to internal fighting.

As the Chem Barons say in 2.02, even if they got total unity in Zaun, they're outnumbered.

However, they don't have total unity in Zaun. They can't even get the Chem Barons to agree on what to do on one topic, with Jinx.

Silco basically has to accept the deal with Jayce when he does, while Zaun appears to be at its strongest. Because if he had waited any longer, the fact that they don't have the strength or money to back it up would have become apparent.

Furthermore, once Jayce resigns from the Council, which he was planning to do anyway regardless of Jinx's attack, would mean Zaun would lose its one champion with the political capital to give them independence. The window for Zaun independence is actually extremely narrow.

With Silco's death and Jinx's attack on the Council, then the subsequent eradication of the other Chem Barons, their resources, their money, including Shimmer which was the only thing Zaun really had to match them against Hextech in that arms race, there really isn't a Zaun anymore.

There's no one to negotiate with. No one to hand power to. No force that can govern itself. Zaun is completely fractured with the eradication of the Chem Barons. By taking them out, Cait removed the need for Piltover to negotiate with Zaun. And the reason Piltover chose not to was because of Jinx's rocket and then the attack on the memorial, which was orchestrated by Ambessa.

This is all according to Ambessa's design, by the way. She divides Piltover/Zaun against themselves by capitalizing on Jinx's attack. She leaves both severely weakened to make it easier for her to take over, and Piltover walks right into the trap. They would have fallen to Noxus if not for Mel's love of the city, even if you remove Viktor and Jayce's plotline entirely.

TL;DR Zaun is gone, guys. It's a distant dream. Sevika is the only person with an interest in making it happen anymore and she can't even get the Jinxers to listen to her. All the factions are easily arrested at the rally. Piltover has no reason to negotiate with any of these people. As the lone torchbearer for that cause, it makes sense for Sevika to be on the Council but beyond her, there is literally no one else to give a voice to (since Ekko doesn't appear to have an interest).

At least, until the Noxians turn on them, and then there's an interest in Piltover and the undercity joining forces, but as I referenced at the beginning of this, Piltover has now lost the right to the undercity's help AND lacks the undercity's resources too. Now Noxus has Shimmer instead of Piltover or Zaun, in addition to their sophisticated and expertly trained military force. As Jayce said, they were meant to lose this fight. Arguably, they never had a chance of winning if not for Mel claiming the loyalty of the Noxians in the wake of her mother's death and everything Jayce did to stop Viktor and the Hexcore.

[bunny-jpeg]

sinful sentences (one)

george russell - "oh, is that how you like it?"

tags: smut/pwp, giving & loving!george, established relationship, sundresses, (house)wife kink, body worship, mild dom!george, (slight) dirty talk, missionary, after-care

the sinful sentences catalogue

george was always more focused on giving you the pleasure he thought you deserved. to let it mount higher and higher until you felt the heavens of orgasm.

but after a year of dating, you still yearned to know what made george squirm. what made his toes curl and his cock throb. the thing about george was that if he didn't want you to

and then it all started with a pretty purple sundress.

"listen, i don't get why i am the end-all be all of baking around here!" you chirped into the phone with his nestled between your shoulder and ear, "literally i say that i remember what bluey looks like and now i'm making a cake for a two year old!" you were bent over as you took the first cake out of the over. you wore soft coloured oven mitts and a matching apron. when you were upright once more with the cake in hand. you almost jumped when you became aware of george's presence behind you.

you managed to put the cake down on top of the stove and look over to see your boyfriend of the last three years staring at you with eyes like saucers. you said on the phone, "hey, mum, i'll call you later. george looks like he just saw a ghost." then hung up the phone and put it on the white counter top nearby. you closed the oven and took off the mitts then the apron.

"what's... all this?" he asked as he looked around the kitchen, to take his eyes off of your beautiful body for a moment. he could feel the heat rise in his body, and it wasn't just the heat from the oven.

george didn't know where the hell you got that dress, and who in their right mind sold it to you. but he loved it! it was short sleeves and buttoned up to the neck. it was a lilac colour with a small checkered pattern. it screamed a sense of vintage that went right to his cock. he didn't want you to think less of him, he loved that you held two degrees and worked hard every day. but to see this small slice of domestic bliss, it made him tense up.

"remember my cousin. the cousin with the kid... not that cousin with the kid. the other one." you tried to explain in the least amount of words.

george dumbly nodded.

"i open my mouth and now i'm making a bluey cake for a toddler." you chuckled as you placed your hands on your hips, "and i have to go to the party... i mean you're free to come too, but that means you gotta see my aunt and that never goes well." you shook your head a little.

"is it a costume party and you're going as a housewife?" he asked to dispelled some of the tension in his body. he gestured to you, "the dress and everything."

the pieces started to come together and you knitted your brows for a moment before you made a 'o' shape with your mouth at the realization, "oh, is that how you like it?"

"wait-"

you giggled, "oh, george. you're so cute." you leaned over to turn off the oven and approached your lover. the freshly baked cake was left abandoned- it needed to cool after all. you reached for him and pressed your chest up against his, "does someone have a thing for housewives."

his expression was shocked as he tried to explain away every aspect of it, "i don't want you thinking that i want you to be some submissive housewife, i love that you was passionate and you have goals. i want you more than just some woman chained to the-" and you silenced him with a heated kiss. you held onto him tightly and he melted a little into the kiss. he felt the slight tightness in his chest.

when you pulled away, you laughed a little, "it's alright george, you're allowed to have a little... soft spot, for it. i know your true beliefs, but it's okay to have sexual fantasies about me as your stay-at-home wife." you trailed a hand down the front of his chest, you could feel the hammering heart. you giggled further, "i guess i finally know what gets you going. what makes those gears turn."

he swallowed, "that's not the only thing." and reached to hold you by the small of your back, "but i can't help myself when you're dressed like this. where did you get this dress?"

"i liked the sleeves, wouldn't get sunburnt in austin this year." you smiled at him, "i guess i didn't take into account that my boyfriend would be turned on by it. but i guess i should be calling you my husband."

"say that again."

"husband."

"again."

"my husband, george russell." and you yelped when he picked you up and got you in a position to carry you away from the kitchen and towards the bedroom. you kicked out your legs a little but george patted you on the ass.

"don't squirm too much, afraid i'll drop you." he felt like he was a predator running on instinct. little rational thought was coursing his thoughts. the direction was simple: get you on the bed and get you naked. the dress was beautiful, but your pussy was even better. he dropped you on the bed and pulled away for you to get a full view of him as he tugged at his belt.

you felt the heat in your cheeks, it near stung and it only made your core soaked as you started to undo the front buttons of your dress. you had a hunch that the normally calm, mild mannered george wanted to just rip those buttons out of the seams. so your hands moved fast.

"you're beautiful. my beautiful wife. look at you, you were bent over the stove like a good girl." he licked his lips, he never imagined he could vocalize words like that. talk to you that way. but as he watch you grow more desperate to get out of your clothes, he knew that you loved it. the filth on his tongue.

slowly you two got undressed, the words only furthered the most that george felt the heat rise in his body. you unwrapped yourself perfectly for him. the sight of you as you soon laid nude on your shared bed. you looked perfect, you looked like the ideal wife for him. he couldn't help himself, not when such a wonderful, beautiful woman was laid out for him.

he was on the bed with you and you helped him get his briefs off. both naked, there was a slight tussle in the sheets as you felt him up and he did the same. he said lowly to you, "you're beautiful. look at you, all those curves, every inch of you. you look like a good proper wife." his tone curled in your brain and made your stomach flip, "maybe at the end of the season, i should make you my wife." he kissed at your neck, "lovely in white."

your core felt soaked from his words. you ended up on your back and looked up at him with a throb in your core. you felt hot all over, hot in a way that made you have a slight tremor in your soul. you replied, "i'm glad you find it hot, george. seeing me as your wife, being all domestic for you." you inched up the bed a little until your head was in the pillows. you eyed up at him and smiled a little.

he got on top of you and your legs around his waist. he gazed at you lovingly, "it does something to me, i can't help it. the sight of you, how at ease you looked. it made me want you, all of you." he hiked your hips a little and slowly he sank into you. his cock hard as it pushed inside of you. he tensed up for a moment, lust clouded those beautiful eyes of his. he leaned over you and admired your features as your expression changed as he slotted his cock into you. you felt heavenly, like a dream as he moved against you slowly.

"george."

"i know, my wife." he said, the words came off his tongue so easily even though you were his girlfriend, "you looked amazing in that dress. you, me, and a nice place back home. somewhere quiet, raise a family." his pace picked up in intensity. you felt something curl inside of you at the notion of that, if that was a reality he wanted or not, you weren't too sure. but, it made you feel a flush of hot all over.

you moaned a little and reached for the covers. you held onto it them as he thrusted against you. he moved against your body like he had done it a million times before. you loved the feeling, the shape of him against you. the heaven that bloomed in your soul as the two of you moved together. your legs tightened around his waist. his pace increased and you groaned loudly.

"you like that, honey? do you like the idea of that. away from all of this. i know we both love the rush of racing, but to be tucked away somewhere just the two of us. finally get that dog, maybe have a few kids. quite the life, huh." the words were warm, not painfully erotic. but just enough to leave a further warmth in your core as he moved against you. he admired you, loved you. you were the perfect woman for him. he felt almost honoured to be able to fuck you, to hold you in such an intimate way.

you nodded, "fuck, george." you met his pace and soon his chest was pressed up against yours. the pleasure flowed between you two as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders. the two of you moved together, the two of you kissed deeply together. you moaned into his mouth and he held onto your sides tightly. but, not tight enough to harm you.

he'd never hurt you.

"i need to buy you more sundresses." he chuckled lowly, "i'd say you should wear that one to the paddock, but i think you'd catch a few stares." he kissed you on the lips for a brief moment as he moved against you, guided your body up against his cock, "you'd look too good, no one would be taking photos of the race. only photos of you. you'd be far too beautiful."

"so i should be at home then?" you asked, playing into the fantasy of it all.

george pressed his nose against yours for a moment, "make me a few cookies to bring on the road." his breathing was increasing from the movements, "not the same as your sweet skin, but it'll tide me over until i get my hands on your soft hips again and let me have my way with you once more." his voice was low, but not in a scary kind of way. it rather left you feeling aroused.

the movements continued, as did the filthy language. the two of you felt hot towards one another. the kisses were painfully heavy as you combed your fingers through his soft hair. and his hands held onto your soft thighs and used it as leverage to fuck you heavier. he loved the feeling of you, you felt amazing. he panted a little heavier and kissed you once more.

the pleasure continued and you felt the fire in your core. you could feel the climax close. you moaned against him and held onto his shoulders, the two of you moved together. it was passion between two lovers as the two of you kissed one another deeply. you moaned against his lips and he thrusted against you.

"you feel so good." you panted, "i'll be your wife, i'll be your everything." you clenched around him, held onto his shoulders tightly and then kissed him. you came soon after and felt the crash of pleasure over you. it hit you all over and you moaned into the kiss. you near melted against him and let the feeling take over.

he continued to move against, he rocked against you further. he was near desperate to climax as well. it was something to see the resolve of george russell crack in favour of an intense need of sexual want. you looked at each other for a moment and he smiled at you. and you felt a zap of overstimulation through you.

you held onto him tightly and he rutted heavily against you. george looked gorgeous, those intense eyes on you made you chest melt and your eyes closed a little and your mouth opened a little more.

"my wife." he said before he worked his hips with a couple more thrusts before he finished inside of you. he rode out his orgasm and kissed at your sweaty collarbones. he loved the sound of your noises when he lightly grazed his teeth across your skin.

you really were perfect, the perfect woman for him. his future wife. he eventually slowed to a stop and lifted his head from you to admire you. he pushed his hair back, his pupils were a little dilated. he slowly pulled out and laid out next to you.

you panted as you curled up against one another. your leg over his thigh and his arm over your side, you composed yourself slowly, but felt a slight exhaustion from the intensity of it all. you said to him, "i'm going to have to remake the cake."

he chuckled lightly and kissed your warm cheek, "that's alright. i'll help you. no need to make it all alone. i can provide some help." and watched your eyes close once more.

you nodded, "but for now, a small nap. tired as anything." and snuggled up when george threw the blankets over the both of you. he kissed the tip of your nose and you smiled softly for a moment. you felt content.

as you fell into a light sleep due to the come down from the intense orgasm. he stroked your cheek lovingly and wondered what kind of wedding ring you would like. <3

[admirationandromantics]

Rivalry part 2

Maybe putting ideas in your heads? Anyways, this is part two of the rivalry thingy with Josh Washington. Too many people wanted this, and it was like half of the requests I had in my inbox, so please, enjoy. Btw! This is 18+ (as is my blog).

You can find part one here: Part 1 I Part 2

Word count: 4,2 k (Unedited)

He walks down to the others, and I smirk at the thought of his sisters berating him for yelling at me. Karma Josh… it’s sweet isn’t it? I walk over to the bathroom, cleaning myself up and splashing cold water in my face. I hate that he gets me all worked up. Even after we’re done, I still feel him on my skin. Scratching, ripping, stroking. Who knew anger and passion were such similar feelings. 

A loud bang on the door wakes me up from my thoughts. I am quick to put on my shirt again and dry my face. 

“Give me a minute!” I yell through the door, trying to be fast while not messing up my makeup. Though it might already be a bit smudged, I can blame it on other things. 

“No, you let me in right now!” Emily shouts through the door. She sounds mad. That’s never good. I have to let her in. Worst case scenario, she throws me out a window and leaves me in the snow to die. The thought sends shivers down my spine, and I have to comply with her request. 

I unlock it, but before I can twist the knob, the door flies open and she runs inside, slamming the door behind her. She doesn’t waste time, locking it and turning to me, holding her finger up to my face. I must’ve done something horrible for her to act like this. She slowly walks over to me and I carefully step back, awaiting the bomb to fall. 

“You have something you need to tell me” she hisses, her finger only centimetres from my nose. 

“I’m sorry Em, have I done something?” I whisper, fear coating my vocals. This cannot be good. I’m gonna die in this ridiculously expensive bathroom. 

“Hell yeah you have done something, something extreme!” she shouts and I look around confused. What the hell did I do? 

“Oh don’t give me that look” she sighs, a slight playfulness to it. It sounds scary. I open my mouth to say something but my words fail me. I don’t know what she’s talking about. 

“Don’t you think I know that you’re fucking Josh” she states, and I can feel the blood leave my face. How? How did she know? We’ve been careful, going away and staying quiet (for the most part). And we hate each other, no less. There’s no point denying it. When Em knows something, you never try to gaslight her. It won’t work. 

“How did you know?” I ask, actually curious. And a little embarrassed. 

“Well it’s obvious” she starts, lowering her finger and sitting down on the chair beside the sink. 

“What? So everybody knows?”

She laughs, shaking her head and leaning back. 

“Everybody know there’s something, but they don’t know you’re fucking. Calm down girlie”

I exhale, feeling some of the tension in the room lift. At least not everybody knows, and that’s good. 

“So how did you find out?”

“How do you think?” 

I try to imagine a scenario that would make her, alone, find out, but I can’t. Luckily, she breaks the silence, tired of waiting on me to figure it out. 

“Let’s just say… 4.0 Honour roll, I’m smart. You already know all this” she says, waving her hand dismissively. 

“And don’t worry. I don’t plan on breaking the little freak show you two got going on. Might even be too freaky for me” 

“Fine Em, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I mean, why would I want to, it’s Josh for goodness sake” I smile, thinking about the whole ordeal. If it weren’t for our differences… 

“Look, I’m not gonna tell you what to do” she starts, and I sit down, listening to her. “But you guys got something going. If you can get each other riled up only through anger, that’s one thing”

I wait for her to continue, wondering if this has some other plot she’s hesitating to bring up. 

“How about you two tried being nice to each other?”

I snort, laughing my ass off at the idea. 

“Josh being nice? That’s not gonna happen”

“It might”

“And how am I going to do that? He nitpicks on everything I do, whether it’s cooking, gaming, drinking, breathing or whatever!”

Emily smiles at me, waiting for me to stop rambling. Her idea is not bad, and it would be great to hang with the group without being caught up in a fight or argument all the time. 

“I’m just saying, you should try. Kill him with kindness” she whispers again, and I sigh loudly. He’s gonna taunt me, make a fool out of me. 

“And that’s coming from you?”

“Need to see someone else do it before I consider it. And, it’s not the worst thing you’ve done”

“That’s right… I did Josh”

“And that’s an example of what you shouldn’t say” 

“Fine, sorry” I hold my hands up in defeat, standing up and unlocking the door. She stands up as well, giving me a knowing look before walking out. I follow, getting down to the living room. 

Everyone is still there, and the mood has lightened since last time, and I take a seat beside Jessica. They’re still playing with cards, drinking and talking. Sam, Ashley and Hannah are off in the corner, giggling about something, and Chris is shuffling cards for everyone at the table. 

“Care to join?” he asks me, looking up expectantly. 

“I’m in” 

We play for a while, before Josh walks in with Beth. I don’t know what they’ve talked about. Maybe he’s gotten berated again. The thought makes me smile, but Emily nudges me, knowing what I’m thinking about. I look back down at my cards. This is a bad hand. 

“I fold” I state, putting them down. There was no way I would win this round, so might as well not bet. Beth walks over to Sam and the others, while Josh moves over to us. He looks over the table, taking in everyone’s position in the game. 

“No way you’ve won twice. Got more than two brain cells?” he taunts, and I have to fight myself from rolling my eyes. Jess sighs, knowing the storm that’s about to come, but I don’t let it. Instead, I put on a smile and glance up at him. 

“I’ve actually won three rounds, Washington. You’re welcome to join us if you want”

The room suddenly falls silent, everyone looking in our direction. Ashley whispers something to Hannah, and both Mike and Matt are furrowing their brows in confusion. Emily is holding her hand over her mouth to stop her from laughing, but the most surreal reaction is from Josh himself. He can’t take his eyes off me, eyes narrowed and mind twisted in confusion. He’s probably wondering where my spirit went, where all the anger had gone. 

To fuel the situation even more, I pat on the seat next to me, signalling for him to sit down. 

“In or out?” I ask, giving him some doe eyes for extra effect. He still glares at me, not necessarily in a bad way, but definitely in a confused one. People return to their conversations, probably talking about what just happened. Our usual banter, all out of balance. He keeps looking at me, mouth slightly open. I give him a sugar-sweet forced smile before turning back to the cards, waiting for the next round. 

The rest of the night goes as planned. Josh makes small comments here and there, but I skillfully avoid getting angry. It actually feels great being the bigger person, especially when his reactions are more visible than any other feelings he’s ever shown. I know he gets more and more aggravated, and I fuel it by just being nice. Maybe I should consider becoming a kind person? 

At this point, half of the group have gone to bed, and I sit on the sofa, opposite of Josh, talking to Chris and Sam. I feel the exhaustion of the night come over me, but still feel restless and anxious. I need a cup of tea or something before going to bed. Or maybe a bath?

“Hey Sam?” I start, grabbing her attention. 

“Hm?”

“You took a bath earlier today, right?”

“Yeah, it’s drained and cleaned now, don’t worry” she shrugs, waving her hand like it was obvious that she cleaned after herself. That’s not what I wanted an answer for though. 

“So there’s hot water?” She laughs at my question, and only then do I realise how dumb it is. 

“Yeah, yeah, loads” 

“Then I’ll be on my way. Enjoy your night!” I walk up the stairs, lifting my hand in a backwards wave. The bathroom is dark, and just for comfort, I light a couple of candles while the water’s going. I washed my hair this morning, and would prefer it not to get wet again. I take a hair clip and fasten it. I don’t bother taking off my makeup yet. I’ll do it when I brush my teeth and get ready for bed. Right now, I’m gonna soak for at least an hour. I undress quickly, shivering from the cold air of the lodge. Luckily for me, the bath is warm and smells great. I get in, slowly getting used to the warmth. It’s almost burning my skin, perfect temperature. 

As I lean back and breathe, my muscles finally relax. They’ve been tense all day, especially after my last intimate encounter with Josh. I look over my body in the see-through water. I haven’t noticed just how many marks he’s left. All over my legs, thighs, stomach, chest, arms… It’s unbelievable that no one noticed. Well, everyone except Emily. A couple of loud knocks interrupts my thoughts. 

“It’s open, but I’m in the bath!” I yell. Everyone must’ve gone to bed by now, so it’s probably someone who wants to use the toilet. 

“There’s another bathroom on the other opposite side of the hall!” I add, turning back to the water and closing my eyes. Please just go, I’m having the time of my life. The door opens, and I shift my head, glancing over at a certain brunette walking in and closing the door. My hands immediately move to my body, covering myself as best as I can. Right now I wish I had some bubbles and foam in here to help me. 

“Relax, nothing I haven’t seen before” he smiles, locking the door behind him. 

“This is different” I start, turning back around and sighing. I feel his body come up behind me, head resting on my shoulder and breath against my ear. 

“Tell me that you want me to go, and I’ll go” he whispers. His voice sends shivers down my spine, my heat warming up as I think about his kisses. As a reply to my silence, he starts kissing my neck, leaving small bites everywhere, though not as hard and rough as usual. 

“This is just…” I sigh and give small moans from his caresses, unable to control myself. “This is too intimate for us Washington” 

“And what if I say that there’s much more intimate things we can do?” he teases, lips featherlike up to my earlobe, nibbling. I hear his belt fall to the ground, before he stands up and walks to the side of the bathtub. 

The air is filled with something different. Maybe it’s the scented candles, fire, hot water, dim yellow lights… Something is not like usual. This is romantic, this feels more real. We haven’t built up the usual tension like we’ve done before. This encounter is purely because of lust and want, not a convenience or deal. He didn’t have to come here tonight, but he did, confident that I would let him. 

He stands before me, naked and vulnerable. His tan skin and toned body are intensified by the candlelight, which highlights every curve of him. I take him in, feeling like I’m seeing him for the first time. Finally seeing him. 

My breath quickens as he gets in the bath, leaning over and meeting my lips. It’s not hatred, it’s not a tension-reliever, but rather soft and caring. I lean into him, slowly making my way over, and sitting on his lap. The kiss deepens, tongues dancing in a waltz. His hands travel down from my waist to my high, slightly grabbing. He rubs soft circles, nothing like what he’s done before. 

“Still hate me?” he asks, breathy and tired. He looks up at me, a pinch of hurt in his eyes. I don’t know what to say. Of course I do, but not right now. My arms are twisted around him, fingers gracing the curve of every muscle on his shoulders and back. 

“I-I never hated you” I manage to whisper back. “Like you said, it’s all part of that horrid game” 

“Is this part of it?” he asks, more determination in his voice. I wish I had an answer for this, I truly do, but what is it? Yes, this only happened because I conducted an experiment, and my hypothesis was wrong? Turns out you want to fuck me either way, though more in a gentle manner? 

“Josh, listen. I got it in my head that we would stop fighting if I just took the high road. It would be more comfortable for everyone. But you’re still here. You came here tonight and I don’t know why”

He doesn’t answer, only looking at me in shock. Did I say something wrong again? His mouth is slightly ajar, lips parted and red from our previous session. God how I want to kiss him. 

“Did I say something wrong?” 

“You said my name”

My chest tightens in realisation. I did. I did say his name. But he acts like the world has ended because of it. I need some kind of answer, some acknowledgement that he got everything I said after it too. 

“Say it again” he pleads, pulling me closer and leaving small kisses all over my collar. 

“Josh, we need to talk about this…” I sigh out, feeling his dick grow in response. 

“Please” he begs, and I let out a small moan as he nibbles at the skin of my chest. “Say my name and I’ll do anything for you, tell you everything you wish for” 

“Fuck, I-” I begin, feeling myself heat up from his words. 

His hand moves to my folds, sliding over them up to my clit. I give a small moan in response, grabbing his shoulder harder for support. 

“Please” he pleads again, pathetic and breathless. As his fingers start rubbing, I moan out his name, and his breathing suddenly quickens. His other hand moves up my body, past its usual place on my throat and to the back of my head, tangling in my hair. He pulls my face back on him, capturing my lips in a needy and lustful grace. 

I break away from him, still waiting for his response to my previous comment. He gives a small whine at the sudden emptiness. 

“Why did you come here tonight?”

His brows furrow a little, but only for a moment. Then, he starts laughing. A genuine one which leaves me in confusion. Why is this funny? Unless… 

If Emily knew, some others might too. Jess is definitely good at picking up these sorts of clues. Did they talk to him, getting me in this position just to humiliate me? Was this all a prank? I ask him a genuine question, and he breaks out, unable to answer. 

I stand up, getting out of the tub. I was not gonna be the sore loser of another prank. A wave of realisation goes through Josh as he understands what I’m doing. He stops laughing, immediately shifting to face me. 

“Where are you going?” 

“Out” I state, irritated and vulnerable. This was not okay, playing with my feelings. 

“What happened, why are you being like this?” he asks, confused. His tone hurts me a little, though not as much as the thought of being part of this little scheme. 

“I’m not gonna be the laughing stock of this little thing. I don’t know if you’ve talked with Emily or Jess or someone else, but this…” I point to and fro the both of us. “This is over, whatever it was. No sex, no feeling, no nothing. I’m done” 

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“Fuck this and fuck you Washington!” I yell at him, as I grab my clothes and walk out. I feel tears at the corners of my eyes, begging to be released to my cheeks, free to roam my face. I did the right thing. We can’t keep going like this forever. It’s a hassle for us, and it’s a bother to others. The relationship had gotten too intimate for me, for our situation. I felt a certain way, and not getting a response from him deeply hurt me. 

“Wait!” I hear from the bathroom, and I walk over to my room, locking the door and laying down in my bed. A knock is heard on my door, but I don’t answer. 

“Please, sorry about the reaction, I’ll tell you everything, just open”

I give in, pulling the towel closer to my body and unlocking it. I open it slightly, not too wide. He doesn’t force himself in, just stands there waiting. I’m the first to talk. 

“You know, Washington, it’s late, we’ve both got caught up in the moment and we said some things and stuff. We’re both tired, a little tipsy, probably dehydrated…”

“I love you” he interrupts. I roll my eyes, done with his bullshit. 

“No you don’t, you can drop the act. I just can’t take all this back and forth anymore, it’s too much, please understand” 

“You’re such an idiot”

I look at him dumbfounded. What the fuck? 

“Excuse m-” before I can finish, he pulls the door open, walking inside and closing it behind him. His arms wrap around me, pulling me into his embrace. The sudden action leaves me breathless and wondrous. He’s half naked, wearing only a towel as well. 

“You are the one who wanted all that, and now you don’t” he starts explaining, and I keep quiet. “I know you adore me, from what I understood in there, you feel the same way”

“Washi-”

“Stop, don’t finish that word. I would never pull a stunt like this for a prank, especially considering how hurt Hannah got last year because of it” 

I look down his back, hands urging to touch him, to feel him on me. 

“Then what was so funny?” 

He takes a deep breath, pulling away, smiling. 

“The fact that you can’t solve a simple equation” 

“Which is?”

“That I love you, and I know you do too. That’s why I came tonight” 

I’m stunned, mesmerized by his words, enchanted with his presence. His lips meet mine once again, and I let him devour me. I melt into his touch, sparks igniting on our skin. The cold air hits our warm bodies, shivers bolting throughout. He deepens the kiss, inviting his tongue and moving us to the bed.  

Instead of shoving me down alone, his body follows, laying on top of me and pressing me into the soft sheets. One of my hands tangles in his hair, grabbing it roughly to get him closer. The other goes to undo his towel, letting it fall and throwing it on the ground. He does the same, unwrapping me in a painfully slow manner. He takes in the view, me laid underneath him, completely at his mercy without disobeying or complaining. 

“You’re beautiful” he whispers, head moving to my neck, leaving kisses and vibrations against my skin. I give a moan in response as his hands find their way to my breasts, grabbing harshly. He’s never complimented me like this before. It’s real, genuine. 

His dick slides up and down my folds, coating itself in my wetness. I want him, the whole of him. I start trying to grind closer to him, but he gets further and further away instead. He kisses down my stomach, head making its way down to my heat. He pulls my thighs over his shoulders before taking one of my hands in his. I can only see the top of his head as he leans down, followed by a long lick over my folds. I moan, legs shaking as he finds my clit, sucking and licking small circles. Uncontrollable sounds leave my mouth as he keeps going, his other hand taking advantage of my dripping heat, inserting two fingers. 

“Fuck, Josh!” I whine, feeling the edge come closer. The knot in my stomach tightens, tension building up as I try to get over it. 

“Yes, please, keep saying my name like that” he whispers against my pussy, voice making vibrations against my clit. His encouraging words get me over, and I cry out as I finish all over his lips and fingers. I squeeze his hand as my legs keep shaking around his head. He doesn’t stop though, letting me ride out my orgasm on his fingers, eyes completely mesmerized by the vision in front of him. He continues his attack, tongue finding its way back to my spot and leaving small movement. I cry out in pleasure as I come again, embarrassingly fast. I look down at him. And he’s shocked by his own skills of effectiveness. 

“Well, I did know you were into me. Surprised by how much” he purrs, leaning back up to my face, capturing my lips. I taste myself on his mouth, lips drenched in my juices. 

His dick keeps running up and down my folds, and I shiver from stimulation. 

“I need you” I whisper to him, and he obliges. He’s harder than he’s ever been before, being teased and excited for way too long. He slowly lets himself into me, pushing carefully till he’s all the way in. I whine, killing a moan that almost escaped my lips. He looks down, facing me with concerned eyes. 

“Are you good?” I nod in reply, smiling at him and pulling him in for another kiss as he starts moving. He fills me up perfectly, reaching all the sides and spots, rubbing my walls with a passion unlike ever before. He grunts and moans, whines leaving his mouth as he moves. He’s been holding out since the card game, no wonder he’s desperate. 

I swallow his moans with my mouth, and he returns my favour. His hand grabs my thigh, lifting it higher to grant him better access. The action makes him go deeper, making me gasp in surprise at his length. My core builds up, and I clench around him as I come all over his dick. He keeps pumping, sloppy sounds and moans erupting throughout the room. He’s close, I can feel it. The overstimulation is overwhelming, and I plead with him. 

“Josh, please”

The mention of his name from my moaning mouth sends him over the edge, and he pulls out, coating me in the white liquid. It spills all over my throbbing and stingy heat, hurt from the overstimulation, and all over my stomach. Instead of leaving, like he always does, he leans down beside me, kissing my cheek. 

“I love you all covered up in me” 

“So much for a bath” I smile, turning my head and kissing his lips. “I’ll take endless baths with you” he smiles back, getting up and leaving the room. 

I’m hit with a sudden wave of sadness. I know he’s coming back, but the idea that he might not weighs down on me. My chest is still heaving, pulse slowly regulating itself. Just now, I realise how exhausted I am. Drinking since early hours, multiple sexual encounters, a bath, and now being the middle of the night. I try to get up, but my body won’t listen, simply too tired to move. 

The door opening again wakes me from my sleepy trance, and Josh walks in, cloth in one hand, a glass of water in the other. He sets it down on the nightstand before laying down beside me and cleaning me up. He’s never shown this much care before, and his sweet actions make my cheeks flush. He finishes quickly, taking hold of my body and dragging me up to the right side of the bed. After that, he holds the glass of water out to me, and I take it, drinking every last drop before placing it on the table again. 

He creeps under the blankets, throwing them over me as well and pulling my body into his. His head rests in the crook of my neck, and I cuddle into him in response. What are we gonna do tomorrow? How will this end? 

“Guess we’re not having hate-sex anymore” he says, kissing my neck. 

“As long as you don’t say anything stupid” I answer, voice barely over a whisper. I’m on the brink of passing out, but before I can, I feel his stupid, perfect smirk against my jaw.

[hotjaneaustenmenpoll]

Third Place Poll

Propaganda...

Colonel Brandon (1995):

Alan Rickman has the sexiest voice. Just listen to him reading poetry to Marianne at the end to witness how hot he is.

Alan Rickman simply embodies the truth of Col. Brandon in a way that no one else every could. It's the perfect merging of actor and role. He brings the perfect combination of honor, decency, sensitivity and passion. He is the ultimate mensch.

Brandon propaganda in which even the film's director agrees that Brandon is sexy.

More Brandon propaganda! This photo could only be published in black and white because it would have been too powerful in color (the original color version is currently being used to provide electricity for a medium sized town in Devon. It's THAT powerful).

The brim of the hat falling over his eye. The casual lean. The hunting rifle slung across his leg. The puppy bestie. The fact you know he could row that boat while you watch and wish you were the boat.

From Emma Thompson's diaries which she kept while they were shooting Sense & Sensibility. Emma Thompson said vote Colonel Brandon.

The man has just heard her sing for a minute and he’s positively awestruck!

also adding his adorable adorable smile just bc i can.

Mr Knightley (2009):

Johnny Lee Miller as Knightley is JUST SO. I mean the way he says "if I loved you less I might be able to talk about it more" IS JUUUST. The dance scene. The tentative shy smiles. The fact you can see in his eyes the entire time " I am completely in love with this woman. She'll never love me back BUT I DO NOT CARE I'LL LOVE HER FROM A DISTANCE ANYWAY" IS JUUUUUUST

We need to appreciate Mr Knightley more for both his snark and for those soft eyes just so full of love for Emma

GIF by dearemma

I was just going to send in the actual dance but the little panic he has when Emma says she knows his secret is just soo charming. There was some thread on twitter a few years ago about how a romcom man's most important quality is knowing how to look at a woman and JLM is just the master of it in this Emma

I really feel like the pictures say it all. He stands there, head tilted to one side. He is listening to you. His posture is relaxed. His gaze open, frank, candid. He's not trying at all. He just is.And that's why he is Knightley.

GIF by night-unfurls-its-splendour

Some propaganda, not just for Jonny Lee Miller, but the general interpretation of 09 Knightley. I have some excerpts here from my review of the 09 adaptation:

What I really think is great about the 2009 interpretation of Mr. Knightley is what an easy and comforting presence he is, without being apologetic when he scolds Emma. I think this is communicated especially well by how often we are actually shown Mr. Knightley taking his almost-daily walks to Hartfield, how smoothly he comes and goes, and how happy Emma is every time she sees him coming up the path (usually, just at the perfect moment when she needs something to put her back to rights.)

64.media.tumblr.com

Here is Emma, feeling lonely after Miss Taylor's wedding. And in the background, walking up to Hartfield--there's Knightley. He's always been there for her, and he always will be.

And also this Mr. Knightley is as understated as ever, but I wanna highlight this outfit and why I love it: This is Knightley’s first appearance in the series and it’s the perfect establishing shot that shows the viewer everything they need to know about Emma and Knightley’s relationship and how it has always been. He sort of materializes, out of focus in the background, but Emma immediately knows he’s there. And to accentuate how much Knightley is part of her home and scenery, his clothes (similar shades of pale tan, white and minty green to the wall behind him) almost camouflage him and make him seem at one with the moulding of her home.

Additionally, Jonny Lee Miller captures Knightley’s playful qualities, and his exasperation is so endearing

GIF by christophernolan

GIF by sashajames

GIF by christophernolan

I can’t be the only one tickled by this Knightley’s frustration with Emma! JLM FTW!

Jonny Lee Miller is mesmerizing in any role he inhabits. It’s 2009 Knightly all the way.

no but can you actually go vote for mr knightley he was FOUNDATIONAL for 16 year old me my favourite portrayal of my favourite austen man cannot fall at this hurdle!!!

He is my ultimate Austen Dream Man, I'm with him until the end. Honestly this adaptation is my very favorite of them all (P&P 1995 is a VERY close second) because it made me fall in love with Emma as a story? Honestly no other adaptation or indeed even my reading of the book made me love it quite as much. My crush on JLM goes back to 1995 and I do think he is one of the better actors of his generation - his range alone is just impeccable. The fact that he can go from Sick Boy to Mr. Knightley to Sherlock to Jordan Chase is really something. Of all the actors I know, his range is the most impressive. But i love how bright and sunny this adaptation is. The colors, it is as vibrant as Emma should be! The Kate Beckinsale Emma is dark and terrifying to me, not at all suitable an adaptation. I like the Paltrow Emma a lot, but it's got the same issue the 2005 P&P has for me -- it's just too short. This is tonally just right, and the casting is lovely, and JLM is just at his dashing best. His face is so expressive, he is so capable of communicating so much without saying a word. His open jealousy of Frank Churchill is delightful to watch. His face when Emma tells him his secret is out at the ball! JLM is maybe the most underrated actor of his generation and I LOVE that he has been multiple Austen heroes. I maintain that in a future adaptation of Pride & Prejudice, an older JLM would make an EXCELLENT Mr. Bennet. He would convey the right amount of grumpy but fond beautifully.

Look. Do people realize JLM hates wearing period clothing AND hates dancing? And yet in Emma he's sashaying around in pink jackets looking amazing and is THAT convincing? That's called BRILLIANT ACTING!!

A tiny bit of Mr Knightley 2009 propaganda but I love that they put in that bit from the book where he looks like he's going to kiss Emma's hand when he's saying goodbye but then he hesitates and doesn't and I just...it's such a tiny detail but conveys so much!

GIF by myforeverworldofmovie

It’s the only Emma adaptation that really hits the romance notes well. Knightley’s crowning moment of awesome really feels like it (when he rescues Harriet from humiliation) and his subsequent dancing with Emma does make you feel a shift in their relations. Love this adaptation. - This Knightley and Emma in particular are equals. They quarrel, not because he’s telling her off, but because they can have an argument because they know each other, trust each other and care about each others opinions, and there is never a sense of domination of one over the other. This adds so much fire to the romance, and it’s so unusual for a romance of that era (or even one written today!!). - Emma is rich, clever and beautiful and as powerful as a woman of her age and situation could be at the time and she married Knightley for no other reason but because he’s her best friend and his company for the rest of her life will enrich her. - He even leaves his house to move in with her!

GIF by elinordash

[skipper1331]

Is it too late to make things right? // Grace Clinton

a/n: based off this request. Hope you enjoy it!

Everything Grace Clinton did, made you furious.

It didn’t matter if it was the way she talked, laughed or played - even just her breathing, blinking or existing made you more than angry.

You hated Grace Clinton with a passion and no, not without any reason, as everybody always said.

"Don’t be so rude to Gracie, she did nothing wrong"

"Can‘t you be nice to her for once?"

"It‘s her debut show some respect"

You hated Grace Clinton for what she did to you and the way she had humiliated you.

But in fact, you respected her debut, she played phenomenally but obviously you didn’t tell her that - you didn’t talk to her at all.

After the game, you walked to the changing room, not looking at the midfielder or giving her congratulations for her game.

"What the fuck is your problem?" the voice of Alessia shrilled through the hall.

"Are you talking to me?" you asked dumbfounded, confused on what the problem was.

"Who else?"

Shrugging your shoulders, you looked at her. "Come on, out of everybody you were the first one to flee the scene"

"and apparently, you the second one, hm?" you cut her off, "Alessia, say what you want to say or leave me alone" you stated firmly, even though you already knew what the problem was: Grace Clinton.

Taken back from your firm voice and the use of Alessia instead of Less made her crumble under your gaze - you loved nicknames, you rarely called people by their actual name.

"What is your problem with Grace?" she asked anyways.

"I don’t have a problem with Clinton"

There it was - Clinton, it clearly showed your disliking.

Alessia knew you well enough to know that that was a lie, not only because you were a terrible liar but the Clinton gave it away. If Lessi had to describe you, she would say "When she calls you by a nickname, she loves you - you’re her friend. When she calls you by your actual name, she a) doesn’t know you yet or b) the situation is serious. When you get called by your surname, there is a problem."

"Didn’t think you’d be a liar" she replied, slowly getting annoyed at your behavior. Grace was like a little sister to her, she had to be protected at all costs.

"And I don’t think I have asked for your opinion"

With that you turned back around and continued your walk to the changing room.

"Ever since Grace is here you’re an absolute ass!" the blonde yelled after you.

-

You avoided Alessia, and Grace even more after your encounter with the blonde. Out of everyone, you didn’t expect Alessia to be rude to you. Not only because she‘s a sunshine herself but because she‘s your club teammate too. But it’s about Clinton, of course she would protect her.

What Alessia didn’t know was that her sweet Gracie was an ass herself, rude and mean.

-

"Hey"

You looked up from your book, seeing Less in front of you, before taking a seat beside you.

"Can I help you?" you asked, turning the page in your book, focusing on the words there.

The striker sighed, thinking about what to say - she stayed silent.

"I‘m not in the mood for being yelled at again, so with all respect, please leave me alone"

"I‘m sorry for my outburst" she apologized, "I’m just trying to understand what the problem is.."

This time it was you who sighed, closing the book, "Less, I don’t want to be rude, but it‘s none of your business. Gracie is not the person she used to be and neither am I. We play for the same country and that‘s it" you stood up from your seat, intending to leave - running away.

Alessia was shocked, not about the part where you said it’s none of her business - she knew you were right - you didn’t call the current Tottenham player Clinton but Gracie. You could have chosen anything yet you said Gracie, a nickname.

"What happened between the two of you?" Her hand on your arm stopped you, Lessi‘s voice caring.

On clue, said person came into view, locking eyes with you.

"We grew apart"

It was the longest eye contact you had with her since what? maybe years. Familiar feelings rummaged through your body - looking into the eyes you once loved so dearly.

Anger was displayed on her face, marching over as she purposely and aggressively bumped into you, "watch where you‘re going" she spat which you only ignored.

"What the fuck, Alessia" the midfielder growled, pulling her somewhere more private.

"Why are you talking to her about me!"

"Grace-"

"No, Alessia! This is absolutely none of your fucking business. She broke up with me years ago, so let her be!"

"Who broke up with whom?" The noisy voice of Ella chipped in. The place Grace chose wasn‘t as private as she had thought.

"Y/n was your girlfriend?"

The young lioness inhaled, closing her eyes for a brief moment, "no.. she ended things before I could ask her."

"Why?" Tooney asked as the best friends shared a look.

"We should go on a walk" the blonde striker then proposed, to which Grace surprisingly agreed. The topic had been bothering her for years, not knowing what she had done wrong, that you didn't want anything to do with her anymore. From one day to the next you ignored her, stopped talking to her - didn't even look at her. What had she done wrong? Her heart still breaks when she thinks back to the evening when everything went downhill. She wanted to ask you that night if you would like to be her girlfriend. You had danced around your feelings quite a while, even though you both knew there was something there - the stolen kisses, the sneaky touches, the love letters - but you broke her heart before she could ask you, even though the real reason was that she had broken your heart first.

"Why haven’t you talked to us?" Lessi asked as the three of them walked outside of the facility in Spain.

Shrugging her shoulders, "there was never a reason to" she replied, "we never played at the same club, so it was easy for her to avoid me, same goes with the call up - she got hers earlier, so we didn’t see each other at camps either"

"How do you feel now? Seeing her?" this time it was Ella who asked.

"I‘m being rude to her. And I know that‘s not right, but it‘s- I don’t even know, unspoken anger I guess, because she just broke my heart and because that‘s the only attention I will get from her…"

"You loved her, didn’t you?"

"I do"

"Do?"

"Did? Have? Do? I don’t know" she mumbled, "how could I not? You know her, she‘s more than incredible"

Years later, Grace still wasn’t over you, being near you made it clear. She couldn’t get over the things she felt for you. You were the first girl she‘s kind of been with. You were her first love story and her first love.

Putting her feelings aside, busying herself with work didn’t heal her, it just made her feelings more intense as they came crashing down now.

"Have you ever tried talking to her?"

"Of course! I asked her so many times what I did wrong, she never answered me" she sighed.

Alessia and Ella had never seen their friend so vulnerable and tired. Her facade had dropped, she deeply cared about you yet all the unanswered questions turned into anger - she just didn’t know how to deal with her feelings and the struggle of not having you in her life.

She missed you.

-

To say that Ella and Alessia saw you differently now was only partly correct. Both of them had many questions, what did happen? What was the reason you ended things before they even started? Has Grace done something wrong? But most importantly: Was there a way to make amends?

It was the next day after training when the best friends decided to take matters into their own hands. You two had to sort things out. The rudeness started getting more and more while the tension grew thicker each second. To be fair, it didn’t affect either of your or the teams playing performance as you kept things professional on the pitch yet off the pitch both of you acted like angry toddlers towards each other.

"We need to do something" Ella huffed at Alessia, both of them watching you growling at Grace.

"Do what? Lock them in a room??" Alessia intended to joke which the midfielder took seriously. "That‘s an awesome idea!", pulling the girl towards Mary - they definitely needed her help.

And when Mary was introduced to the idea, the three, so called master minds, came up with a perfect plan.

-

"Grace, wanna play darts?" Ella asked the young lioness, grinning.

"Um, maybe later" asked person replied as she relaxed on one of the bean bags in the 'movie' room.

"Are you afraid you‘ll loose?" Tooney challenged - she knew Grace could never back down a challenge and not even the slightest when it was something as simple as darts. It can’t be that hard to throw a dart, can it?

Meanwhile Mary asked you the exact same, the only difference that you agreed in an instant, darts something you loved to play in camps.

Walking to the 'game' room of the facility - a room with darts, pool and table football - the gk and you talked about the last upcoming friendly.

Arriving in the room, "I forgot my lucky dart!" Mary suddenly stated, leaving the room quickly, "I’m back in a moment" she called.

Not thinking anything about it, you waited for her to come back.

She didn’t.

In fact, when the door opened again, someone stumbled into the room before the door was quickly locked.

"Ella?!"

"Sorry for pushing you!" the man united player answered behind the closed door.

"Why are you locking me in this room?"

"Turn around" you answered.

The current Tottenham player jumped, "don‘t scare me like that!" her hand clutching over her heart, trying to calm down.

"You have to sort things out" Alessia joined the conversation.

"We can play darts after that" Mary added.

"We‘ll be back in an hour"

You grumbled under your breath, marching away from Grace who stood in front of the door hoping it would open magically.

"I guess, we have to talk if we want to leave this room today" Grace said after 10 minutes of an awkward silence.

"No thanks" you responded nonchalantly. You didn‘t want to talk to Grace ever again unless it was work related.

"Come on, don’t be so stubborn" the midfielder slowly walked towards you sitting on the pool table.

"Grow up, Clinton"

"I grew up while we grew apart" she mocked your words - words that hadn’t left her mind ever since you said them. What did you even mean by that? You haven’t grown apart - you ended things out of nowhere!

"Clinton, leave me alone"

That was the last straw, "can you fucking stop with the Clinton?!" she snapped, stepping right in front of you. She hated it. Yes, it was her surname and she loved to see it on the back of jerseys but she hated it when you called her that. What happened to Gracie? Lovely girl? Or love?

"Get a grip, Clinton"

There was no point in making an effort - you wouldn’t talk, you‘ve made that very clear.

Grace walked to the other side of the room, sitting down on the little bench that was the next to the dartboard.

She felt helpless. And even though she was in the same room, it felt like the two of you were oceans apart.

The silence was deafening.

You didn’t mind that - as long as Grace was shutting her mouth, you‘d be fine with everything.

Grace did mind it - it made her anxious. She was closer to you than she had been in years. This was her opportunity to find out what she did wrong and what the reason was that you hated her now. What happened to being friends? Secret Lovers? What’s happened to the chance of being together forever?

"Y/n/n, please" the young lioness almost whispered. You froze, you hadn’t heard that one in years - the midfielder, the only one who ever used that nickname.

"Just answer one question and I promise you to never talk to you again off pitch"

"You better keep that promise" you said firmly, turning around as the Tottenham player jumped up, walking towards you.

Leaning against the table football, she thought about her questions - which would be the best to ask.

"What did I do wrong?" It was the most obvious question to ask but maybe the answer would finally give Grace some inner peace.

"Seriously? Of all the questions you could have asked, you chose one where you already know the answer-"

"But I don‘t! I don’t know anything! Out of nowhere you cut me off! Pretending I don’t exist!"

"You don‘t exist to me anymore" you stated rather calmly while Grace was gesticulating wildly, frown and the wrinkle between her brows deepening.

"How can you say that?! I used to be important to you"

Lowly, you empathized "Used to" which was only partly true. Parts of your heart always yearned for Grace, hoping she was doing well and achieving all of her dreams.

A part of you still loved Grace Clinton, and forever will.

"Just- just answer the question, please"

"You humiliated me, Grace, you humiliated me in the worst way you ever could."

"How? I‘m so in love with you, i would never dream of upsetting you in any way."

You laughed, clapping your hands, "You‘re funny"

"What‘s wrong with you?!"

"What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with you?" You felt yourself getting angry, starting to match her furios energy. As if Grace didn‘t know what she had done - what sick game was she playing?

"You humiliated me, Grace, that’s what wrong. How could you? I thought- i thought you liked me. At least enough to keep private things private and not to read them out loud in the fucking locker room!" your voice took many changes in that short statement. It started off calm, before it turned sad, almost vulnerable as the last part was full of venom.

The midfielder froze on the spot, arms falling to her sides as she realized what the problem had been years ago and still was.

The unknown feeling exposed now, flashbacks crossing her mind from that day, "the letters" left her mouth, eyes wide. How could it be that she hadn't thought of this sooner? Now everything made sense! Your anger and hostility towards her, the abrupt break in contact. The world was no longer your enemy, your only enemy was someone you believed would never break your heart. A someone that had promised you to fight with you against the world but instead, she had weakened you so much that you no longer had the strength to do so - your last strength was directed against her.

"Exactly. I‘ve heard what you said, Grace. And the worst part? You didn’t even read them. Our friend read them out loud and you laughed about them, telling the whole locker room that i was weirdly obsessed with you 'Nah. I don‘t stand her - she follows me around like a lost puppy. I don‘t even like girls' I remember everything, word for word, Clinton"

Your eyes turned glossy, you never healed from that humiliation.

"Listen to me-"

"No, you will listen to me." you growled, your voice was so full of anger, stepping towards her to intimidate her, "stay away from me"

Grace was breathing heavily, her eyes darting around your face - you were so close to her.

Not in control of her soul, mind or body, Grace smashed her lips against yours, hands gripping your hips as she pulled you close.

You couldn’t even register what was happening before your body responded in kissing her back - matching her energy.

The kiss was nothing like the kisses you shared before - it was feisty, all anger purred into this one kiss.

Yet it felt so good, your heart felt peace, an old familiar feeling you only ever felt when you were with the lioness. The walls you had built around it were gone. So even though Gracie was the reason why you had built them in the first place, she was now the reason why they collapsed.

When you slowly came to your senses, you pushed her away, lips swollen from kissing each other, feeling dizzy at the intensity and the feeling of happiness it had given you.

"I‘m sorry-"

"A sorry won‘t fix anything!" you shouted. You were so confused.

It was the first time where you ever had raised your voice at Grace. You didn’t mean the kiss but the girl knew exactly what you were referring to. And even though, you didn‘t like shouting or yelling in general, let alone at someone like Gracie, you defended yourself with that - an apology wouldn’t fix anything nor would a kiss.

"Sorry, I didn’t mean to raise my voice" you said, not liking a shouting atmosphere or the sad look in Grace‘s eyes.

"It‘s okay" the midfielder breathed out shakily, "you know, all of your love notes are in my wallet. I read them at least once a day" she admitted, staring at the floor, not being able to trust her voice if she would look you in the eye, "It was stupid to think that I didn‘t know what I have done wrong while it was in fact right in front of me. I broke your heart the day you broke mine." taking a deep breath, she sorted her thoughts, "I have no right to ask for your forgiveness, all I want to do is give you an explanation."

You nodded slightly - you always wanted an explanation but instead of confronting the girl that day, you ran away, protecting yourself more and more over the years.

"One of the girls found your letters in my bag when they searched for something, I don’t even remember what. She read them out loud while I was on the other side of the locker room talking to your friend. I asked her, if I had her blessing to ask you to be my girlfriend. I knew how important it was to you and since she was the only who knew about us, that was the least I could do. We never talked about telling our teammates, so when she read the letters, I panicked. I panicked because I didn‘t want to be outed by someone else. I also panicked because I didn’t know if you‘d be okay with me admitting our- my love for you. I got so scared in that moment, that my self-protection mechanism answered before I could even reflect the situation. It felt like a stranger was controlling me. And you‘re right, 'sorry' won‘t fix anything but I want you to know that it was never my intention to break your heart. I meant it when I said that I want you to be mine forever. I have always loved you and I don’t think, that I will ever love someone who isn‘t you. So, even though it won‘t fix anything; I sincerely want to apologize. I‘m proud of you and the footballer you became - I will always be your number one fan"

Throughout her explanation, three things remained in your mind,

1. I don’t think I will ever love someone else - did that mean she still loved you?

2. Strangely, you believed every word she said. Grace had never lied to you - she was a terrible liar anyways.

3. Ask you to be my girlfriend - she wanted to make things official..?

"I did. I wanted you to be my girlfriend the second you smiled at me. I remember your shy smile, the way you looked everywhere, only briefly stopping at me." she chuckled, a love sick smile on her face.

"I thought I said that only in my head" you mumbled, cheeks turning red.

As Grace took a step closer, her hands cupping your cheeks, so you would look at her instead of the floor. "I never wanted to be your enemy" she whispered, her lips pressing tenderly against your forehead - a confession and a promise.

In that moment, both of you realized that maybe it wasn‘t too late to make things right. But it would take time and patience for you to learn how to love and trust each other again.

[thatgentlewife-deactivated]

Welcome to My Blog!

Hi there, lovely! I’m so glad you’re here. I’m a 20-year-old wife, homemaker, and most importantly, a servant of Jesus Christ. I was blessed to marry my wonderful husband in November 2024, and every day, I strive to honor God by embracing biblical womanhood, nurturing my marriage, and cultivating a home filled with love, warmth, and faith.

I believe in living a life that reflects God’s perfect design—one of gentleness, purity, and devotion. My heart is set on serving Christ first and foremost, and second to Him, my husband, whom I joyfully submit to as my leader and protector. I cherish the beauty of traditional values, which shape every part of my life—spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

What I Stand For

✨ The Sanctity of Life

This blog is pro-life, because every child is fearfully and wonderfully made by God (Psalm 139:13-16). Life begins at conception, and every baby has a God-given purpose. I believe in supporting women with love, resources, and guidance so that no mother feels alone in choosing life.

✨ The Dangers of Pornography

This blog is anti-porn, because pornography destroys hearts, marriages, and intimacy as God intended it. It turns real love into something selfish and empty, leading to addiction, shame, and broken relationships. I believe in fighting for purity and God-honoring relationships that reflect true, selfless love.

✨ Biblical Marriage & Submission

I believe in God’s design for marriage—a covenant between one man and one woman. As a wife, I embrace submission as a beautiful, biblical calling, trusting my husband’s leadership and honoring him in my words, actions, and heart. Love, respect, and obedience to God’s Word create a strong, joyful, and lasting marriage.

✨ Domestic Discipline

I believe that domestic discipline is a personal choice that should be made mutually and consensually between a husband and wife. While it’s not for everyone, I support a couple’s right to practice it if they believe it strengthens their marriage. When approached with love, respect, and biblical principles, it can provide structure, accountability, and deeper trust. As long as both spouses agree and it is done in a way that honors their relationship, I see it as a valid and beneficial dynamic for those who choose it.

✨ Biblical Womanhood & Femininity

I am passionate about biblical femininity, modesty, and creating a home that reflects Christ’s love. I believe true beauty isn’t just about how we look, but about having a gentle, quiet spirit (1 Peter 3:4). In a world that devalues womanhood, I strive to embrace my role as a wife and future mother with joy and grace.

✨ My Perspective on Feminism

I do not agree with today’s version of feminism, which rejects traditional femininity, submission, and the beauty of God’s design. However, I do believe women should have the right to vote and make choices for themselves. Women are not less valuable than men, but we are beautifully different, and our strengths should be celebrated rather than diminished by a culture that seeks to erase them.

✨ My Beliefs on Gender & Sexuality

I personally do not believe men can become women or that women can become men. I do not agree with the LGBTQ lifestyle, and you will not find me in support of it on this blog. However, I have nothing against those who choose to live this way—you are a valuable human being, just like the rest of us. My belief is simply that marriage was created by God to be between a biological man and a biological woman. If you disagree, this may not be the blog for you.

A Few Things About Me

• I love to cook! (I once dreamed of being a chef, but my heart is too tender for the food industry.)

• Children are my joy! I work in childcare and find so much fulfillment in nurturing little hearts.

• I love reading! (The Phantom Tollbooth is my favorite book!)

• I enjoy poetry, songwriting, and drawing. (I may not be the best artist, but I love creating beauty in every form!)

• I make soap, lotion, and tinctures as I learn more about natural living.

• I strive to be a good, submissive wife and grow in grace, patience, and humility every day.

Why I Started This Blog

Marriage is a journey, and I want to share mine with you—the joys, the lessons, and the ways God is shaping me into a better wife and homemaker. My goal is to encourage other women to embrace biblical womanhood, cherish their marriages, and build homes that reflect God’s love. ❤️

If you value faith, femininity, and the beauty of a God-centered life, you’re in the right place. I pray that this blog blesses and encourages you as we grow together in grace and truth.

With love,

thatgentlewife

[revoevokukil]

Ciri's Trilogy

Ever since The Witcher 3 was published, concurrently with which I first read A. Sapkowski’s works, I have wanted a trilogy of games about Ciri. Any fanfiction would do, including CDPR’s one. Fanfiction, because I believe Sapkowski wanted to leave Ciri’s future open to the imagination of everyone. It’s part of her charm—she gives hope that anything at all can happen. Hence, in all honesty, I just wanted to continue imagining her story: beyond the end of Lady of the Lake, beyond the end of The Witcher 3. I want to read more about Ciri. Period. Consequently, I am now elated, but also terrified.

I don’t take issue with Ciri, the witcher, I take issue with Ciri having gone through the Trial of the Grasses. I hope CD Projekt Red will change their minds about this, or at very least makes it work differently on Ciri—the Child of Destiny—than on other witchers. For starters because, as Geralt notes in Sword of Destiny, the witchers believe the Child of Destiny would not need the Trials. Ciri is special. She is a mutant carrying the blood of elves, mutated in conjunction with the human genome. Elder Blood, witcher-trained, magic-capable, princess, heir of an Emperor & descendant of another such beyond the stars, prophesised mother to another even more powerful mutant saviour, if not a saviour of elves herself. She is extraordinary; she does what witchers do despite of it all, despite not getting or needing the mutations.

’What can you know about saving the world, silly? You’re but a witcher.’

But now she is just… also one?

The sceptic in me says the only reason they went for Trials for Ciri was to keep it close to how the gameplay holds up. To have a "witcher-eyed", female protagonist upholding their brand. So it could be about potions and signs additionally to what Ciri would have had by default → oils + magic + Elder Blood. I would like for them to give us witcher Ciri, but book-Ciri - a witcher girl setting off after monsters while remaining herself, with her own struggles and unique perspective on the universe. This here feels more like a PR move, and I don’t like it in the grand scheme of things; even while seeing a rough and capable Ciri tickles my heart in a special way. There were other ways to gamify her abilities; they are giving her magic use anyway, after all. It feels a little cheap. In fact, I can see how Elder Blood—Ciri’s uniqueness—is precisely how CDPR can handwave away the Trials, but isn’t the “cosmetic” aspect of it exactly the point? It makes the decision hollow, a ploy, but if you were to give this decision depth then you would run the risk of overstacking your protagonist and forgoing the spirit in which her character was conceived and relates to witchers and the world.[^1]

Moving on. This was the only part that I did not like and, as ever, there are ways of writing yourself out of this. (I dearly hope they have writers who love book Ciri.)

A few years have passed since the end of The Witcher 3 when The Witcher 4 begins. Witcher Ciri wants to be the hero. She has always wanted to do the right thing; she is always picking sides. She is young, she is idealistic, and she is furious. It’s what seems to unite the Ciri in The Witcher 4 with her at the end of The Witcher 3.

"She's almost obsessed with the way she lives. There are some moments where you have to go with your heart instead of always going with the calculated calls. And this is what I love in Ciri. She's less calculating, following her heart, her passion, her gut feel.” - Source

In both the published and draft endings to The Witcher 3, Ciri chooses potentially fatal, self-sacrificial “rituals” for the greater good. She chooses; you, the player, cannot do anything about it. (In the drafts you could, but it turned out to be a bad decision.) In the trailer though, it seems like Ciri is almost running away from herself, or something else, by the way she dives into this life. This intrigues and has storytelling potential - getting what you have always wanted is one of the most dangerous things in the world.

The world and people keep disappointing her, however, and, as the monster used in the trailer not very covertly insinuates: “fate cannot be changed”, "you weren't supposed to come back.” In this sense it almost feels like The Witcher 3 should have been Ciri’s story from the very beginning, because they are revisiting important beats from it and, after only a few years, are likely to handle loose threads. Ciri’s struggle is with having been born to exceptionality, to a destiny larger than life, yet desperately trying to make it smaller for the sake of her soul.

The insinuation made about Ciri’s life through Mioni—the peasant girl offered in sacrifice to a local “God” for the greater good of the community—is not subtle. This is Ciri fighting off the echo of her own story, trying to change such fates in principle. For Mioni, if not for herself. Saving her from being ritually sacrificed—as in prophecies. The monster she faces, by the way, preys on trauma. No subtlety here, whatsoever.

“At first glance, it seems that it is just the flower that is floating on top of the water,” says Kalemba of a cleansing sequence in a bathtub. “But the fun fact is that this is a very Slavic kind of flower. This is a special flower that people in the medieval era were using in special moments to defeat evil. It is very symbolic. Every single frame here is very meaningful.” - Source

But the world and people keep disappointing; Ciri's good deed goes unrewarded, and Mioni dies anyway. Because in principle the Mechanism is set up in a certain way and it is running and it is not easy to grind it to a halt without casualties. How much then is Ciri ready to sacrifice if she is wont to pick a side and fight no matter what? Such questions, I intuit, may become relevant later in her trilogy, but the seeds are sown. Because frankly, in the trailer, Ciri comes off as in The Tower of the Swallow: she has figured out philosophy. It’s a little naive and lacking in experience, seeing the world narrowly, focusing on her truth. It’s very youthful. It’s also—curiously enough—backtracking from the end of The Witcher 3.

What happened in-between The Witcher 3 and The Witcher 4, and, overall, the books and the games? I predict that in Ciri's first solo they may be doing a parallel in the spirit of Lady of the Lake’s ending - Ciri running away from herself/past/failure while attempting to build a new life. It's relatively safe, it's solid. Additionally, in CDPR's original concept for The Witcher 3's "witcher ending," Ciri was meant to experience a profound disillusionment with the witcher's path. After facing the harsh realities of the profession, she would abandon it entirely, choosing instead to traverse the universe in search of ways to atone for running from her destiny—a destiny that demanded she use her extraordinary powers for the greater good of many beings across different realms. It’s possible a double-bottom is hiding in plain sight.

I hope they will explore a truly morally ambiguous Ciri, letting her be messy and problematic rather than simply heroic. I hope they address her past experiences with nuance, not shying away from the ugliness. I hope they let her get drunk in her obsession with the witcher life for a while, break hearts, slowly begin stitching her own back together perhaps. I hope they navigate into the heart of her magic, touch the painful humanity within without forgetting that she has an origin story already, and dare to explore her as Her.

Footnotes

[^1]: I am also sure they go through with the plot where facing the White Frost has locked or seemingly robbed her of her Elder Blood abilities, for better or worse. And since this is going to be a trilogy I will further bet she will get those abilities back as the stakes for her climb higher and higher toward the end game. The other pathway would be that she starts out as having it all, so to speak, and ends up with nothing at all (but we did not see her blink here, I think, so I doubt this); finally "normal." At whatever cost. Narratively in a computer game, for a character who is the Grail, THE person who could do it all, this sort of shuffling makes sense. You can keep the gameplay fresh.

[the-lambda-archives-ai]

Statement of : Gordon Martinez Freeman, 30 year old MIT graduate,Regarding a peculiar video game he’d found.

Recorded direct from subject, May 16, 200-

Statement begins.

Pt 1 > here

ABOUT 👇

Hello! I am the author of this AU, you can find my main at @inkzectz , for more meta questions about this AU, or for general comments about it, please go there.

What is the AU about?

LA : AI is a crossover AU of sorts, in the simplest way put, it’s TMA but with HLVRAI characters, TMA stuff happens but altered to fit the general HLVRAI narrative, and with my own changes, headcanons, etc. added

I will be updating/editing this post as I progress.

Will it have spoilers?

Disclaimer!!

The AU will have a lot of the original themes of hlvrai and more so TMA, more so, horror themes, this will include gore, body horror, worms, decomposition, cult themes, psychological horror, arachnophobia,flashing imagery, etc.

(Will update as I go on)

I also feel it is important to mention this is the first time I have ever made a ask blog/ web comic/ published a story online, I will make mistakes, please bare with me as I am trying to figure things out.

English is not my first language, I do my best to grammar check and write well, but at the end of the day I will also be making mistakes.

Please be patient with me.

This au is a passion project of mine that I am doing on my free time because I want to, it is important to remember as a reader, I do not owe you anything.

It is best if you’ve seen it but as of writing it right now (early ep 4) there aren’t any spoilers. Once I am a little further ahead then you may want to listen to it.

Yes, not a lot, but vague/mild spoilers about how the world works, plot points, and character.

Again the spoilers will be vague and mild at worst, as it progresses I would recommend listening to tma, but it’s sort of like how while half life knowledge is helpful in hlvrai it isn’t exactly necessary to enjoy hlvrai bc it’s different enough from it to not really matter (?) I hope that makes sense.

Asks rules

- No telling [ player ] exactly what happens ex : “omg [ player ] when you weren’t looking [ npc ] said this very important thing that is supposed to be kept secret for lore reasons”

- Please avoid asks like “tell this character they’re pretty” while I appreciate the compliment, I am trying to write a story and want to keep things as on topic as possible. Instead tell me on my main if you like the art, I’ll probably reply with a doodle or something, just not on here.

- Less so of a rule but more so of a general statement, I will be avoiding asks that either are too close to what happens or if answering would mean progressing the story too quickly, there’s a lot I want to happen and I want time to do it all.

- Another one that’s less of a rule and more of a general thing, if I don’t like what you said I won’t be answering.

- I also sometimes just don’t know how to answer some things.

- Please be respectful of the ships I choose to include and don't force your own, ship wars and such will not be tolerated.

- Please be respectful of others and do not spoil anything, not everyone has listened to TMA and knows it's themes.

I will not be answering everything, I cannot always get to every message so please be respectful of that.

Select character

Character abouts! [ Will be updating as I continue to work on the story ]

[ select ] > Mr. Freeman

> Gordon Martinez ‘Martini’ Freeman

30 y.o . 6’0 . 230lb . Romani / Puertorican . male [ he/him ] . bisexual

[ PLAYER ]

> Lives in Seattle, MIT graduate, left Black Mesa, works as a librarian IRL but also makes money via streaming video games occasionally, in real time it is 2018.

> Believes in the paranormal out of fear but tries to rationalize out of denial, he will never admit something is supernatural and will jump through hoops to rationalize even if deep down he does believe.

> Has a son named Joshua Medrano Freeman, who is 6 years old, Gordon and his old partner met in college but split up before Joshua was born, they remain civil but are nothing more to each other than Joshua’s other parent.

> Gordon rents an apartment with 3 rooms, his own room, Joshua’s room, and a third that used to be a guest room but he has so little visitors he’s just chosen to revamp it into a gaming room.

> Gordon works primarily in a library for now as he’s looking for a better job.

> Gordon often wears hoodies, sweaters, t-shirts, crew necks, and any general outfit one would wear at home, long curly hair that is beginning to grey due to stress, unkempt goatee, and almost always wears green tinted glasses [ he doesn’t need glasses he just thinks they’re cool ]

> His hair is usually pulled back in a ponytail but can also be found in a bun or just down.

< [ select ] > Mr. Coolatta

> Thomas ‘Tommy’ Coolatta, primary researcher, and technical head of the institute.

39 y.o . 6’7 . 190lb . Chinese/filipino . Male [ he/him ] . ???

[ NPC ]

> His father owns the Lambda institute and he grew up in it, he officially started working in the archives when he was 24, and of all the employees in the entire institute he has worked there the longest.

> No one knows who his father really is, Tommy being the only one who’s ever actually seen / spoken to him, his father is the real head of the institute but gives most his orders through Tommy, so Tommy is also technically the head as well.

> Not much is actually known about him, besides his father he doesn’t appear to have any other family, nor does he ever speak of his personal life much.

> Tommy primarily works as an archival assistant, specifically in research, he is the one who will verify details regarding statements or do further investigations into aspects of the statements.

> Tommy is quite the colorful character, often wearing colorful clothing and accessories, he seems to think doing so brings some cheer into an otherwise boring environment, he often wears patterned polo shirts, cheap company bracelets, pins, lanyards, pant chains, but is never without his signature multicolor propeller hat.

[halfway-happyyy]

It'll All Work Out

summary: you are casually involved with a one Mister frank castle, but still have unfinished business with one of his biggest adversaries, matt murdock. angst and soft feelings ensue.

warnings: brief mentions of violence

pairings: frank castle x reader, matt murdock x reader

You awaken in the morning hush to the familiar sounds of the city coming to life around you. Millions of dust particles dance and shift in a ray of 5 AM light from the crack in your curtains. A warm weight shifts next to you, and an impossibly toned arm circles your torso ever tighter. For some inexplicable reason before you turn, you half expect to find a shock of unruly umber hair and ruddy, stubbled cheeks beneath a pair of gorgeous hazel eyes. 

And then, a barely noticeable smile lifts Frank Castle’s lips skyward, and you’re back where you’re supposed to be, as if you’d never left at all.

“Mornin’,” He murmurs and lifts the back of your hand to his lips, brushing it softly.

“Morning, Frank.” You kean into his touch, craving more of it always, as if enough of it will make you forget the way that he felt beneath you.

Frank traces a deliberate fingertip down the bridge of your nose, his molten bronze eyes alert and shining brightly in the inky light of dawn. “Last night was nice.” He offers.

And he’s not lying.

You can still feel the scorching heat from his fingertips on every inch of your body; an inexplicably satisfying ache still exists at the apex of your thighs from being stretched a little too fully by him… “Every time with you is nice.” You take cover from his gaze in the hollow warmth of his neck. The low reverberation of his chuckle against the top of your head causes a tremble to wrack your body, and his hold on you tightens involuntarily. 

When you’re close like this- when there’s no telling where either of you end or begin, it’s entirely too easy to lose yourself in all of it. Your home has been a safe space the last six months. There are no cuts to be patched up, no ghosts in the shadows, no goodbyes.

No Matthew.

“You’re a million miles away.” 

His gravelly tone is teasing, but there is a hint of something else beneath it that causes tidal waves of guilt to ebb away at you and you swallow thickly before answering- “I’m right here.” It’s as much a reassurance for him as it is for you.

A sudden vibration pierces the imminent stillness of your bedroom, the sound of it foreign and unfamiliar, and you frown against the jut of Frank’s collarbone. “Who’s even up at this hour?” His voice is thick with the weight of recent sleep. 

The ringing stops, and you think with relief, that it’s the end of that, but less than a minute later, it starts again and you groan in unconcealed frustration. 

“Whoever it is needs you.” 

Turning in Frank’s embrace, you reach for the phone on your bedside table and blanch at the name flashing across the screen. 

MM.

Frank recoils against you; it’s so quiet in the bedroom that you can hear the particular hitch of his breath as it catches in his throat. He doesn’t have to ask what MM stands for. “Better answer it, sweetheart.” His tone is frigid, touching dangerously close to full-on hostility. He presses a final, chaste kiss to the rounded curve of your bare shoulder, lifts the duvet from his body and swings his legs over the side of your bed.

You watch the muscles in his toned back ripple and flex as he bends down to retrieve the pieces of his clothing abandoned in the searing heat of passion the night before. 

“Frank, I don’t want you to go.” And it's God's honest truth.

A melancholy laugh exits his mouth in the form of a huff, as he shrugs his shoulders. “I’d be lying if I said I wanted to leave, sweetheart.” 

So stay…

“He’s never stopped loving you.” His voice was a wine glass on the precipice of shattering entirely. “And maybe I was on my way there, too.” 

God, this was never part of the plan.

Frank clears his throat, trying in vain to rid his voice of emotion. “I’m confident in my feelings for you. Have been from the moment you poured me that damn cup of coffee,” The creases next to his eyes deepen as he revisits the memory. “But the fact of the matter is that he beat me to it. And as nice as the last six months have been, there are three of us in this bedroom and it’s getting a bit crowded.” Where you expected his gaze to be angry or accusatory, it’s anything but.

Tears prickle threateningly behind your eyes as you hug your arms tighter to your frame. “I’m sorry, Frank.” 

He’s fully dressed now and standing at your window, his hulking figure silhouetted by the breaking morning light is a sight for sore eyes. He shrugs after a while. “He needs you.” 

And what about you?  You want to ask. Don’t you need me to?

But it’s Frank Castle. And he hasn’t really needed anyone for a long time- at least not the way that most people do. 

So, he gathers you in his arms for a final time, presses his lips to your forehead, and takes his leave to go. But before he vanishes from sight completely, he hesitates on the landing of your stairway and turns back to you, his penetrating gaze still just as dazzling as ever. “Right person, wrong time.” 

Right person, wrong time. 

From where you are, you hear the sound of your front door opening, but miss the sound of it closing. Instead, an indecipherable noise emanates from Frank, followed by a humorless laugh. “Well, this is rich.” 

Your heart skips a beat as you throw on an old shirt and take the stairs two at a time. At the bottom, you’re met with a scene that’s still difficult to piece together. Matt is hunched up against the side of your house, beaten and bruised from what looks like a brutal fight. Taking inventory of the damage, you notice a violet bruise blooming beneath his left eye, a shallow cut on his cheek seeps crimson blood, and he’s favouring his ribs. 

“You always were a little too good at taking a beating, Murdock.” Frank spits. 

Matt shifts, wincing from the pain. “If you think this is bad, you should see the other guy.” 

“This isn’t funny, Matt.” 

He won’t look at you. Not yet. 

“Do you need a hospital?” Frank asks, finally. 

Matt shakes his head. “Just rest.” 

And it’s the look that Frank leaves you with as he climbs onto the back of his motorcycle; he needs you. He disappears at the end of your street and you find yourself missing his strong, protective reassurance almost immediately. 

“I didn’t mean to interrupt.” Matt’s voice is hoarse, and causes goosebumps in waves on your arms. 

“And yet somehow, you always manage to.” You sigh and slide down the wall next to him. Taking his hand in yours, you’re shocked at how cold it is and you turn to him, concerned. “How long have you been out here?” 

Matt clears his throat. “A couple of hours, give or take.” 

“You can’t keep doing this, Matt.” Your statement is quiet, almost lost to the white noise of the city around you. “It’s just too painful.” 

His unseeing gaze is focused on something ahead when a single tear cascades down the front of his cut cheek. It’s an unfamiliar sight; in the many years that you had known him, he’d only let himself cry once or twice. Placing an arm around him, you pull him to you and hold him as tightly as he allows you. When a light rain begins to fall, you tell him it’s time to go in. 

He reluctantly gets up, groaning in pain as he follows you back into your house. While the bathtub is filling, you get to work searching for the proper supplies to start patching him up. 

“Are you going to tell me what happened?” You ask, and take a step between his parted thighs. “Or shall I rely on my imagination?” 

He gazes up in the direction of your voice, and you can not help but lose yourself in his beautiful hazel eyes. “Lately, I’ve been waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat,” His voice is low and raw with emotion. “And I worry because I don’t feel anything. I just don’t feel anything.” 

His eyes close and you feel your heart splinter.

Ripping open an alcohol swab, you take the back of his head in your hands and warn him that what you’re about to do will sting. You pass it over the cut on his cheek and he flinches against you, his body rigid with discomfort. 

“I get worried that I’ll stop feeling everything one day.” He grunts.

So, under the cover of darkness you become the devil of hell’s kitchen and start fights you’re not always sure you’ll win. 

“A valid fear,” You agree. “You did feel that, though.” You gesture to his cheek, and he only frowns in reply. 

Matt clears his throat, his expression suddenly earnest. “Frank-” You shake your head, your heart twinging at the sound of his name out of Matt’s mouth. The rest of the words fizzle and fade in his throat. 

“Stand up.” You instruct, quietly. And he does as he’s told. You take the hem of his shirt in your hands and carefully lift it up over his head. “Jesus Matthew…” You release a pent-up breath as you notice the smattering of fresh bruises that decorate his upper body like a warzone. He recoils when you pass a delicate fingertip over a particularly dark spot. 

“It’s not as bad as it looks, kid…” 

The sound of your nickname makes you falter. It had been years since you’d last heard it, and where it should have incited immediate frustration, you are surprised to find you’d missed it. Next to go are his pants, which pool on the floor around his feet. Stepping out of them, he shimmies the black boxers from his body and steps into the all-encompassing comfort of the steaming bath. 

Turning to make your exit, a fragile noise rips from the hollow of his throat before he asks if you’ll stay. After a couple of minutes of silent deliberation, you nod your head and take a seat on a stool next to the bath. 

Matt sits in silence for a while, the only other noise in the room is the subtle pitter-patter of rain on the skylight above you. Scars of varying degrees of seriousness decorate the expansive planes of his alabaster chest, and it’s all you can do to keep from reaching out and tracing them. When enough time has passed, you fill a jug from beneath the sink with warm water and pour it over Matt’s head. Pouring a dollop of shampoo onto his head, you work the mixture into a lather in his hair and rinse that out as well. When you’re finished rinsing out the conditioner, he stands up for you in preparation of the body wash. You watch, wide-eyed as water drops race themselves in misshapen lines down the length of his lithe body, and your mouth goes dry at the sight of it all. Taking the soapy sea sponge in your hands, you make quick work of his entire body. 

“Feels good,” He murmurs when you’ve poured the final jug of warm water over him. 

While he finishes up in the washroom, you make quick work of changing over your bed. He wanders in a little while later, his hair still slightly damp despite him toweling off. Lifting the corner of your weighted duvet, he sidles in next to you, and all of it is almost painfully familiar; like he’d been here all along, like he’d never even left at all. 

You both are nose-to-nose now. Every scar, every fleck of green suspended in a sea of hazel is on display for you, and any resolve you might have had before fades entirely. “I did mean what I said earlier, Matt.” 

He reaches a warm palm up to caress your cheek. 

“You pick and choose when it’s convenient for you to let me in and I just… I can’t keep doing it. You’re breaking my heart.” A single tear slips from the corner of your eye, and he doesn’t see it- cannot see it, but his thumb catches it and brushes it away. 

He’s never stopped loving you.

“You’re it for me, kid. I’ll never leave you again.” He doesn’t say what you both know is true; that he’ll never stop doing what he does to protect the city he cherishes so deeply, but there is a truth to those pretty words that simply wasn’t there before. “That is, if you’ll have me.” 

You capture his lips in a kiss that might as well be the last one you’ll ever have, and when you eventually pull away, you’re both breathing hard. Wordlessly, you guide his hand to the spot above your rib cage where your heart beats a slow, steady rhythm. 

“I love you, Matthew.” 

I love you, I love you, I love you

[myargalargan]

Polin's theme - a musical Polinalysis

Alright...I am very rusty with this stuff (I studied music theory ohhh 15 years ago or so) but I couldn't resist delving deeper into the subject of this post. Anyone else with more expertise in this area, I'd love to know your thoughts!

So, we hear a lovely soaring orchestral theme in the background when Colin and Penelope kiss for the first time, yes? To remind ourselves, here's the theme in full.

The actual theme starts at about the 18s mark, but I included those initial 18 seconds because what's going on in the strings at that point helps orient us in the proper key. There's a resolution to a D-flat Major chord around the 5s mark as Colin's starting to lean in. Given that, and the rest of the notes in the theme and how they relate to each other, I'm assuming we're in the key of D-flat Major. (And I'll get into why it's meaningful to know this throughout the analysis.)

The theme we hear in this scene is made up of two main musical phrases. The first goes like this:

The second starts the same but takes a slightly different path at the end. It sounds like this:

What I think is interesting about both of these phrases is that we neither start nor end on the tonic (aka the first) note of a D-flat Major scale (which is D-flat). The phrases start on A-flat and end on E-flat. Why is this interesting?

Think of the tonic note of a scale as "home." If you start a musical phrase on the tonic note, that gives you a good sense of where you are harmonically right off the bat. The phrase will always take you away from that tonic note, but what creates tension and movement in the music is that ever-present desire to return home.

The phrases in Polin's theme neither start us at home nor return us there. In fact, the last part of the first phrase descends within a D-flat Major scale from A-flat to G-flat to E-flat and then hangs there. E-flat is one note in the scale above the tonic. Musically, we desperately want to resolve from E-flat to D-flat, but the phrase suspends us in that desire. The next line, instead of giving us a nice solid D-flat, drops us back to A-flat and starts the phrase over again.

I think this is a beautiful bit of musical storytelling. Just like the music dances around the tonic note without ever grounding us there, Colin and Penelope's relationship at this point is heading into uncertain territory. And just as the tension in the melodic line builds and never quite resolves, we are left at the end of the kiss scene with a dramatic transformation having occurred in Colin and Penelope's relationship and no clarity as to what's next. (Except that we would desperately love for them to keep kissing. 😉)

Then we have Colin's dream. And in the dream, the moment his and Penelope's lips meet, we hear that theme again. But hark! Something's different...

It's subtle, but this repetition of the theme is a half-step higher than the previous iteration. Instead of being in D-flat Major, we're in D Major. I think this is cool for two reasons.

First, it sets the dream scene apart from the real kiss scene in a psychological way—by giving it a slightly higher musical tonality, it has a slightly higher emotional tone. There's a little less uncertainty, a little more freedom.

Which brings me to the second cool thing, which is that, historically, D Major was regarded as the key of triumph and victory. Composers liked to set marches in D Major. The "Hallelujah" chorus from Handel's Messiah is in D Major.

And what could be more triumphant than marching into your crush's firelit garden, brazenly confessing your feelings, and having those feelings returned in a passionate kiss? You can even hear in this variation of the Polin theme that the tempo is a bit more expansive. It feels more like a confident stride with your head held high than the previous iteration, which is just a touch more frantic.

Then Colin wakes up. His world has been rocked. The next time he and Penelope see each other is in the willow scene, and just before they duck under the willow tree's cover, we hear a third variant of the Polin theme (thank you to @i-know-the-endss for pointing this out!!)...

Two things that I think are interesting about this return of the theme are 1) we're still in D Major, and 2) the end of this variation, unlike the previous variations, actually resolves down to the tonic of the key (which in this instance is a D)!

What does this mean? Personally, I think it's a fun little tease. We're hearing the tune the same way it appeared in Colin's dream... Will this first real-life meeting between Colin and Penelope since the dream play out the same way? The phrase grounds us on a D at the end rather than leaving us suspended on the note above with a desperate need to resolve that tension. Does that mean we'll see a resolution to the tension in Colin and Penelope's relationship?

And of course we do not, which is why it's a tease, but I love that the music builds the excitement at seeing Colin and Penelope interact for the first time since their kiss—for the first time since Colin's newfound emotional conflict—in this way. Like dangling a little carrot for us and then yanking it away.

Finally, later in that same episode, we hear the theme one more time at the first party Penelope attends since her self-flagellation in Whistledown.

This time, however, we're back in D-flat Major. Back to the reality of the first kiss, where things were uncertain and unsteady, instead of in the hopeful triumph of Colin's dream.

This is also the shortest iteration of the theme we hear. It abruptly ends partway through the first phrase. In this case, we are left dangling on an F, which is the third note of a D-flat Major scale. Because we are not yet "home" on the third, we still feel a lack of resolution here. However, unlike the very first iteration of this phrase, where we traveled down to the second note of the D-flat Major scale and were left with a desperate feeling of wanting to resolve just one more note down to the tonic, the third note of the scale lacks the same urgency and sense of direction. We are unresolved, but without knowing exactly where we want or need to go in order to achieve that resolution.

I think this is a great bit of musical storytelling, as well. At this point in Penelope's arc, she just wants to move on and find a suitor, and she still does not believe Colin could ever fill that role. Later in that party scene, she makes a connection with Lord Debling, and her objective for a husband is renewed. Colin, on the other hand, is starting to pine for Penelope something fierce, but he's still battling with himself about who he is and what he really wants. The outcome that will bring them both happiness, while obvious to us viewers, is not clear to either Colin or Penelope. Thus, a dangling F in a D-flat Major key without a clear path home.

A couple more notes (ba-dum-tss) about this theme... I speculate in the musical transcription at the top that the first occurrence of this theme is in 12/8 time. This is because the strings that are running underneath the main theme have a dance-y triplet-like quality to them which made me feel like each beat of the theme is actually a quick three-count. I bring this up because the first movement of Beethoven's Appassionata, which Francesca indicates is a particular favorite of hers in her conversation with Lord Petri in ep2, is also in 12/8 time. Not only that, but the second movement of the Appassionata is in D-flat Major, the same key I postulate we're in for the first occurrence of Polin's theme. Nothing profound here...I just think it's neat.

And to anyone who read all this, know that I appreciate you deeply!! And I'd love to know what you think. <3

I wrote a part 2! | and a part 3!