#literally only made this set for the last one
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— THE THRILL OF THE HUNT.
♱ TRIGGER WARNINGS: Johann literally hunts down the reader, Small outburst at the end, and a lot of bullshit talk about hunting because I like it, DEAD DOVE. No violence was used.
Synopsis: You escape from Johann, he has to track you down. WORD COUNT: 1.6k
Johann wasn't exactly the thrill-seeking kind. He always preferred a slow-paced life, not filled with many excitements or tragedies. He wasn’t an adventurous spirit or a fiery soul in search of greater meaning. In his head, the only thing he needed was you.
And maybe that’s why this exact moment made his blood boil with newfound rapture, he could swear for a moment his skin bumped at the feeling of his heart throbbing so quickly against his ribcage. The thrill of the hunt, like his father used to say, made mere men become beasts, some because it was vital for their survival, others because of the rush of power it gave them.
But he couldn’t quite understand it until now. For him, hunts weren’t that exciting. The game was always too easy to track down, the footsteps effortlessly concealed. The gun didn’t feel heavy enough. His breath didn’t quicken at the mere chance of letting his prey slip away; he’ll always find a way to reach them again, after all. Animals have their habits; they’re easy to decipher once you know their true nature.
This is the type of hunt he’s been craving for so long. Johann had to press a hand against his mouth to prevent a low chuckle from escaping. Oh, how right his father was. This was truly trilling to the core, the kind of thrill that made a foreign heat rise towards his head and seep into his very brain tissue.
Humans aren’t like animals, their behavior is a little more erratic, animals can be divided between highly intelligent beings and straight-up dumb ones, but humans? All of them had their quirks, you couldn’t easily guess how prepared someone could be under certain circumstances. “Isn’t that so fucking interesting?”
Lowering himself to the ground Johann reached to touch the freshly shaped footstep that his precious prey left behind. If they’re leaving such a pretty trail behind they’re expecting me to find them, what a tease.
“You know what kind of animals roam these types of terrains?” His voice was loud enough to carry its sound through the extremely quiet, when the hunt begins, the forest goes quiet, no need to scream. “Bears, moose, sometimes even wolves. Had to detangle a lot of ‘em from traps before, not without properly securing they won’t be able to bite, ‘course.”
His heavy boots made the rotten wood and debris scattered around the forest soil yield under their weight, no need to change onto more quiet shoes, his bunny wouldn’t be able to hear him coming, surely their heartbeat was the only thing resounding inside their ears. Reaching into his pocket he took out his watch, starting a countdown. “I’ll give you two minutes to gain distance, cover your tracks, you can try hiding if you want, but I wouldn’t recommend staying still, it makes you easier to spot.”
“Once the two minutes are done I’ll begin searching, I'll make a bird calling each 45 seconds, and once three minutes pass by, I’ll stop making bird callings and hunt in earnest, ‘kay? Just want to make the game easier for you, it isn’t fun if I’m the one with the upper hand all the time even if this is my subject.”
With a deep sigh, he crouched down again, his hands fidgeting inside his pocket until he found a cigarette, the last one actually. Grabbing his lighter he lit up the tip, taking a slow inhale before letting the smoke escape from his lips.
His free hand reached to grab the gun he always had with him, it was an old friend of sorts, stuck by his side in all the worst situations, a lot of people meeting their death at the end of this same barrel. Maybe it should have your name, after all, people do name their guns sometimes.
The forest grew more eerily quiet, the sun setting down in the distance while Johann quietly awaited the starting gunshot of the race, he didn’t really need to put the time on his watch, he could already count the time down to the millisecond inside his head. “Forty-eight, forty-nine…” His gloved fingers tapped against his lips, hands tightly clad in leather gloves, perfect for the harsh Austrian winter.
A part of him wished you didn’t even make the effort to run away, maybe finding you curled up against a rock or a tree just waiting for him to find you was more exciting than actually pursuing you, after all, that meant you truly gave up on the idea of leaving him behind—still, another part of his brain screamed for you to run, so he could find you and make sure you won’t try pulling up bullshit like this again.
Slowly he stood up, the watch making a low beeping sound before he began to walk, settling the gun back onto the strap around his thigh. Holding the cigarette in between his lips he began to prepare the clothes you were going to use once he caught you, after all, little you decided to escape both barefoot and barely dressed, the worst thing in this forest beside him was the cold. Holding the spare jacket he always brought with him inside his bag and a blanket he continued to walk nonchalantly, not even sparing a single stare in any direction that wasn’t just dead front and center.
Johann's stare drifted onto the floor, a little disappointed that you didn’t take his recommendation into account, there, clear as day, were your pretty little marks for him to follow like a bloodhound. Johann even took the time to carefully make sure he didn’t accidentally step into any of them, not wanting to overshadow the loving tracks you left behind for him with his heavy boots.
He knew very well he was taking all of this too lightly, this was a high gamble where he could lose everything or gain all, but still the elated sense of happiness and bubbling excitement made him more self-confident, too sure you wouldn’t get away too far, and even if you did, he’d stay in the damn forest all the time necessary for you to realize you need to go back onto his loving arms.
Stopping dead in his tracks he turned around as he heard a small sound coming from behind a fallen stump, dead bark peeling off the tree’s corpse. There you are.
And there you were indeed, curled up in a ball, back pressing against the rough bark as you held your arms around your torso, bracing yourself from the harsh winter cold, from the shiver that ran down your shoulders towards your legs or the sight you so pathetically defenseless made him smile, a blush creeping up onto his features.
“You didn’t even run far enough to let me do any bird calls, are you that tired, baby?” He kneeled down in front of you, but as soon as you jolted up in surprise Johann’s hand shot to grab your wrist with unnerving quickness. His dark eyes bore into you, a small smile gracing his lips, but there was no emotion behind that expression of his. “That’s okay, next time I’ll give you some proper equipment, some shoes wouldn’t hurt.”
His thumb caressed the skin of your wrist, while his other hand threw away the now almost half-smoked cigarette that Johann held in between his lips. Eventually he reached to grab your head in between them, rubbing your cheeks with such tenderness that it could be even soothing in a different situation. “There, you did good. Not good enough to grant you a reward, but you did have me a little scared back there.” His smile widened as he lied through his teeth. You frowned, tired, freezing cold and also breathless, but still with enough energy to try and pry his hand away from your wrist, it was useless, he was latched onto you like a handcuff. “Fuck yo—” Before you could even finish he reached to clasp his free hand onto your mouth, the sudden movement making you stumble backward, head pressing against the tree. “Fuckin’ language.” He whispered between his teeth, staring at you dead in the eyes. “You should be grateful I didn’t put a damn bullet in between those pretty eyes of yours. Runnin’ away from me like that? After all I did for you? I let you away from my sight for just a second and you go jolting away like a fucking rabbit.”
Taking a deep breath he lowered his head, slowly pushing his hand away from your mouth, his face leaning closer to you, the only warm feeling gracing your warm body being his hot breath against your face. “Sorry ‘bout that.” He pushed your lower lip with his thumb, pressing a soft kiss onto your flesh as some sick and twisted kind of apology.
“I won’t be as lenient next time, ‘kay? You know I care about you a lot, meine Liebe, don’t want you getting hurt.” He forced a smile, leaning his forehead against yours, but again his voice was masked by the thumping sound of your heart against your ears. “Let’s get you back to the car, I’ll get you all warmed up and cozy.”
You just let him grab you, his hands effortlessly grabbing you and carrying you bridal style as both of you made your way back toward the car, you stole a few glances at Johann’s face, finding a small smile and that darn blush in his cheeks that showed how much he enjoyed himself, maybe a twisted part of him was truly pleased by all of this, even if it just started as a rebellious act of trying to escape from your part.
“Hear that? It’s a White-tailed eagle. Birds of prey, always hunted them with my father as a child.” Suddenly the forest wasn’t so quiet anymore, the hunt has ended.
#ah yes#is that#“the author's thinly veiled fetishes“ moment#anyways hope u guys don't mind me nerding about hunting...#male yandere#yandere#yandere oc#yandere x reader#chrona... writes stuff?#johann the bastard
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obsessed part two
bokuto x reader
(afab. this is the most comfortable i write in. i try my best to make it as gender neutral as possible and not give any description of the reader. lmk how i can do betterrrrrr)
- authors note: you guys really liked part one. so abt to write a SINFUL part two ☺️☺️☺️
part one -link here!
LABELS: smut omg smut. i’ve never written anything smut so don’t judge pls 😩😩contains, making out, oral sex, sex.
walking to school the next day was a pain. bokutos mind was filled with the guilt of what had happened last night.
he jerked off to the girl in his class, who he still has yet to talk to.
ashamed was an understatement. he was embarrassed and felt inhumane. it was even worse because the problem still hadn’t gone away. he still thought of you in the worst ways. he couldn’t help himself.
closing the distance between him and his class room, his eyes narrowed in on you. the guilt was overwhelming. but you looked so cute in your uniform.
entering the classroom he groaned to himself. sitting down at his assigned desk, putting his hands over his face to try to hide his frustration.
he just liked you so much that it was truly embarrassing. he was bokuto koutarou! one of the top aces in high school volleyball. no girl should have his attention like this.
i am not a man, he thought to himself, hands still covering his face.
“ahem…” he looked up at the person trying to get his attention.
to his absolute shock, you were standing right infront of his desk.
“hi…” you said to him waiting for a response…. the response never came as bokuto just looked up at you mouth agape.
“i didn’t know you were so shy!haha” you try playing off to make it less awkward. his silence seemed to be maybe a message for you to just walk away. and yet you stayed begging for his presence.
“well i’m yn, and i didn’t know if you noticed but we have a partner project in this class…. and we were paired up yesterday…. and before i could figure out a plan with you, you walked out of class before i could talk to you yesterday.” you felt yourself ramble on for what seemed like far to long. his silence was draining.
from what you heard from most people, your schools ace was a huge standout. most calling him extroverted, crazy and annoying.
but right now he sat infront of you saying not a word.
finally he spoke up “oh..” he said. that’s literally all he said.
you stayed for a little longer, watching his face grow into a friendly smile.
“it’s nice to meet you yn! i’m so sorry i didn’t even realize we had an assignment together!! HAHA well don’t worry we can get it figured out. also sorry about yesterday i just rushed off to practice without a second thought” bokutos voice boomed throughout the class room.
you let out a sigh of relief. maybe he was just waking up still? but he sure does seem awake now..
“we can only work on the assignment out side of the school hours…. if your comfortable with it you can come over to my house tonight and we can work on it.” you say smiling down at him.
bokutos prayers have been answered. everything he has ever worked for is being rewarded back to him now.
“yes.!” bokuto replied without hesitation. smile still beaming up at her.
“here’s my number, text me after this class gets out.” you say to him. stealing his phone and saving your contact in his phone. you were a little forward. bokuto was practically gushing.
with that you walked back to your desk and started talking with your friends.
bokuto was so happy he could scream.
the day went on, after you two had agreed on a set time for him to arrive at your house he was counting down the minutes.
he would have to come over after he practiced, meaning he would also have to go home to shower before hand.
it gave you more time to get ready before he made it to your house.
secretly, you had been honing a crush on bokuto for awhile now. when your teacher announced that you two would be in a group together you were thrilled. but when you looked over to bokuto, he seemed… upset.
his face was hard to read. it was a mix of tired, guilt, and anger. you chose to not introduce yourself to him until class was out, not wanting to make a fool of yourself. but before you could he had already left.
that’s why you were so nervous. he was so big, not just tall. that man was beefy. in all the right ways. and you couldn’t even tell if he liked you at all.
of course you would glance at him time to time in class, even showing up to some of his games in previous years. you noticed him.
analyzing yourself in your mirror. checking the time ever so often.
you had taken a shower, got out of the shower and did all your duties to look the best you could. sporting yourself in a way you were most confident.
also going to the measure of cleaning your room. everything had to be perfect.
before you new it your doorbell rang. you rushed to the door, opening to a freshly washed bokuto.
he had on grey sweats and a black hoodie. his hair was still a little damp from his shower, so it wasn’t spiked up in its usual manner. his bangs clung to his forehead.
“heeeLLO” he said to you voice getting a little louder as his word continued.
“hi” you said to him while still looking him up and down. it was a little obvious you were checking him out.
you quickly let him in and gave him a tour of your home. making a mental note to leave your bedroom for last. making a b- line for your kitchen you offered him somthing to drink.
his presence alone was enough. he was just soo huge. you felt his gaze after every corner you took.
“uh yes water is fine.” he said, way more calm.
you got him a glass and sat on your counter top. he was infront of you leaning his back on your cabinet.
as he drank he held a comfortable eye contact with you.
“how was practice?” you spoke up.
he reached forward and put his glass next to you, then leaned back to his formal position.
“i did way better then i did yesterday i can say that much.” he said with a chuckle. his voice was low. deep.
“what happened yesterday?” you asked.
he seemed a little taken back from your question. but it was only a second of that expression that was followed with a smile.
“oh i just didn’t do my best. my teammates say i get in my own head sometimes but even my worst is not that bad soo” he said with a low chuckle again. his grin never really left his face.
he was confident in himself that was forsure. you thought you should atleast see where you stand with him. gathering up all the confidence you had to flirt with him just a tinyyy bit.
“oh so you must be gooood.” you say leaning forward a little, still perched on your counter top. you made sure you arch your back a little, even though he couldn’t see it from where he was sitting. you applied the action anyways.
bokutos ears perked up a little. he sure did love flattery.
“i mean, yeah. i’m pretty good.” he said non chalantly. leaning forward a little more as well.
“tell me bokuto, how good are you?” you asked. leaning just as much as you could without falling off the counter top.
“oh i’m pretty good. but i can’t tell you how good i am… it’s something you have to experience yourself.” he said, smug. grin still on his face.
as he spoke he had stopped leaning against your counter top.
he got closer to you, your heart beat picked up. he then picked up his hand, reaching out.
just as you thought he was going to touch you, he picked up his glass beside you. blushing your thigh in the action.
he picked up his glass and finished the rest of his water with a gulp.
smug bastard. you thought to yourself.
you then got back onto your feet and started walking out of the kitchen. bokuto taking that as his note to follow behind you.
you silently led him to your room. anticipating whatever came next.
as you waked bokuto stared. he stared at your ass, your hips, your waist. anything he could look at he took a mental picture of.
this could be the only time he was this close to you. he thought.
opening the door to your room you, you showed him around.
“you can sit anywhere your comfortable with, but i did get an extra chair for you at my desk.” you say to him. going and taking a seat next to the school work you had already laid out.
bokuto was taking in everything. your posters, your decorations, anything you had in their he was saving in a file in his brain.
he finally sat down next to you.
you started going over the project, he would follow your words with some “hmm” or “ook” but overall he didn’t seem very into it.
all bokuto could think about is you stuffed full of his cock. really it was a shame. you were talking to him and that’s all he could think about. he watched your lips as they instructed him. that’s all he really watched.
“bokuto.” you said in a firm voice.
“are you even listening?” you said to him slightly annoyed.
“uhh yea…” he replied guilt sinking in once again.
he was evil. he wanted you. he felt as if you had just teased him in the kitchen too. he wanted to get you back. bad.
he licked his lips. confidence surging through him for a second. he opened his mouth to say somthing.
but the words never came. blush flooded his face. you probably think he’s stupid at this point.
“you are so pretty.” he said quickly. it came out of nowhere. he didn’t even mean to say it. he was so embarrassed!
but there was no way you were gonna know how embarrassed he is. no, bokuto koutaro never gets embarrassed!
you stare back at him. confused. but to all honestly. you were aching for him. his frame so close to yours, made you painfully aware of how big he was.
and he just called you pretty. what even in your next move! what are you supposed to say to that!
“y/n…” he said quietly. it was soft. he had gotten closer to you then you realized. you could feel his breath on your lips.
“bokuto…” you whispered back to him. the distance was painful.
before you could register he had his lips on yours. closing the gap. you locked your lips with his. it was just a quick kiss. romantic if anything.
you two pulled away. staring him in the eyes, there was a hunger.
“i need more” he said before grabbing you cheeks and closing the distance again. you were shocked. this must be a dream.
your hands found his body. scooting as close as you could without falling off your chair. one of your hands found his bicep. the other on his shoulder.
the kisses grew hungrier. his pace picked up. you gasped when his hand found your thigh. it was a comfortable position.
he took this chance to slip his tongue into your mouth. you purrred against him.
your touches grew with sexual tension. you parted for a second to catch your breath. a line of saliva connecting you two.
“c’mere” he said scooting his chair back alittle. signaling you to get out of your chair.
you stood up waiting further instruction.
he reached up and grabbed your hips pulling you closer to him. he was still seated, legs apart.
you felt like you were on fire. his eyes took in all off you. his hands rubbed your hips. even going a little farther to pinch at the fat of your ass.
“wanna sit on my lap?” he said tilting his head to the side. you shook your head and slowly made your way to his lap. you were positioned so you could face him.
his hands cradled you, finding your curves.
“you think i’m pretty?” you said to him bringing your hands to his jaw.
“you have no idea.” he breathed out.
finding his lips again except the tension in the room was now thick. you were growing a pool in your panties. every touch of his fingers was doing numbers to your core.
without knowing it you slowly started to grind yourself against him. you only noticed when you felt bokuto grow underneath you. his hands moved to your ass. grabbing at it.
then his hands slowly fell even farther. coming concerningly close to your core.
“y/n…. can i…?” he parted quickly. out of breath begging you for more.
“yes bokuto.” you moaned out to him. still grinding your hips against him.
“do whatever you want” you moaned out throwing your head back. you were growing needy.
without any words bokuto grabbed you and picked you up. putting you down on the bed.
your back was on the bed with your legs folded to your chest. he had ahold of your shins.
he was standing above you grinning like a kid in a candy shop.
“i’ve been waiting for this.” he stated.
his fingers graced over your core, you sucked in breath.
“you have?” you whimpered out.
“i have liked you for quite sometime. i have even dreamt of doing somthing like this too you. y/n… you have no idea.” he said while taking off your pants. you were left in only your underwear. then he started working on your shirt, pulling it off over your head.
now being left only in your bra you felt very conscious of everything.
“fuck…” he said to himself seeing you drenched through your panties. this was truly his dream.
“can i?” he said before continuing.
you shook your head yes.
he touched your clothed core with a certain grace. seeming like he was afraid to hurt you. you moaned out at his touch.
your ass was almost off the bed when he slowly came to the ground squatting on two knees.
you soon realized what he wanted to do.
“bo… you don’t have too” you said painfully, when al you really wanted was his tongue on your cunt.
“i want to.” he said before stuffing his face into your core.
you still had your panties on but the friction was just too much. you moaned out back arching for him.
he was hooked. he circled anything he could with his tongue, even taking breaks to kiss your stomach. he finally took your underwear off.
staring at your naked core he was in love. he wanted to be the only man to ever see you like this.
experimentally he blew on it, seeing your body react and you moan out. he loved his life.
diving back into you he licked all of you. slurping up your juices, sucking at your clit. taking every angle he could to make you feel good.
“more…” you whimpered out.
he brought his fingers up to your hole without warning. he played with our rimming a finger around your clenched spot. sticking it in you he stucked on your clit simultaneously.
you moaned out. it was really too much. your core was building up at a fast rate as his finger pumped in and out of you.
he stoped and stood infront of you again. you looked up at him wondering why he had to hault your pleasure.
he took off his hoodie and sweats leaving himself in just his boxers.
and oh. my. god. he was wonderful. he was everything you could ever dream.
“bokuto… i need you.” you told him.
he was on fire right now. you were sprawled out on the bed, cunt for his to see.
“fuck… you drive me insane.” he said pulling his boxers down to free his length.
“oh my god” you moaned out. it was huge. there was no way that was going to inside you. his one finger did the job, so what is that thing even going to do to you.
“cmon baby you can take me.” he said lying down next to you on the bed. you crouch up on your knees.
“ride me.” he demanded.
you positioned yourself on top of him. grabbing at his his abs as you mentally prepped yourself for what was gonna be inside you.
slowly you reach down for his cock. he had already been stroking it.
you touch it and he lets in a sharp gasp of air. you give it a good couple pumps
“hah” he moaned out. you had kept eye contact the hold time you entered him in you.
lowering yourself as best you can. his face was of euphoria.
“bokuto… your tooooo big hah” you moaned out to him.
“call me koutarou” he gasped out.
you found the strength to get him in you. bottoming out you clenched around him.
“fuuuck kou” you moaned out. you started grinding yourself against him.
it was the best pain you had ever felt.
“your beautiful. oh my god.” he said as his hands found your boobs.
pulling your bra down and bringing his lips to your hardened nipples.
your back arched for him. you moaned out louder and louder.
bouncing against him. this was all he ever wanted. he was in heaven.
you felt that familiar coil in your core tighten up again.
and bokuto could tell. he felt your walls clench around him as your threw your head back.
before he could think about it he changed positions. throwing you on your back and into a missionary position.
he took it to himself to start pounding into you.
“kou… nnnits too muchhch” you moaned out. it was almost hard to hear because of the sound your pussy was making.
“cmon. you can take it” he grunted out, slamming himself into you.
you moaned more. eye contact the whole time he fucked you.
the way you clenched around him was almost painful. but he could tell you were close.
he brought his fingers to your sensitive bud.
“cum for me. come on baby you can do it.” he grunted.
“come on my cock.” he grunted even more.
you were so close.
“your mine, understand?”
that sent you have the edge. you clamped around him spasmsing through your orgasm.
bokuto barely pulled out in time to cum on your stomach.
“i’m yours im yours im yours…” you babbled off to yourself.
fuck.
you were both drained.
who ever thought this is where you would be.
he got up to get a tissue for you to wipe you off. then coming over to press a kiss to your forehead.
“i’ll be right back” he said he before he left.
he came back with some water and helped you up.
“what’s going on?” you asked still faint from your orgasm.
“i started a shower for us!” he beamed at you.
yep. he could definitely be the one for you.
………………………………………………………………………………….
- WOWWWWW WHAT DID I JUST WRITE! this is my longest and still some of my first works i’ve put out. well i hope you like it also. comment any ideas you guys have for me!
#haikyu x reader#haikyuu#haikyuu x reader#daichi x reader#haikyu fluff#haikyu manga#daichi sawamura x reader#anime#manga#haikyuu smau#bokuto#msby bokuto#bokuto x you#bokuto koutaro x reader#bokuto smut#hq bokuto#bokuto x reader#haikyuu bokuto#bokuto koutarou#bokuto fluff#smut#haikyu smut#haikyuu smut#twt links#bokuto x y/n#haikyuu x you#haikyuu x reader smut#haikyuu x y/n
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HONESTLY THO can we talk about the angst of Aylin and Isobel’s separation from Isobel’s side of things
Because the angst from Aylin’s side is there and obvious and very very clearly a huge motivation for her actions and yeah it’s great. But Aylin is the immortal. Aylin was always going to be the one that watched Isobel die. They both always knew this, it just happened way before they expected and caused a whole lot of turmoil. And even with all her angst, Aylin is certain that Isobel is dead and not coming back. She saw her body. She probably saw her buried. She probably say many of Ketheric’s vile attempts to bring her back before she was imprisoned. Isobel is dead and not coming back. Losing Isobel and then spending a century being tortured and bound as a means of helping Ketheric maintain profane power and immortality is like…so much and it’s driving her passion and anger when you meet her, but it’s also very obvious that’s what’s going on when you have the context. And when you have the context, it’s clear and it’s obvious to see.
But Isobel’s angst is just so subtle and steeped in uncertainty.
Isobel woke up and it seems like she didn’t even realize she had died. She describes it as nothing and then waking up. She doesn’t know how she died. She doesn’t remember dying at all. She just knows she woke up and it was a 100 years later and everything was very, very different.
Her father had been a Selunite when she died, and now he was gone from Selune to Shar to Myrkul. He went from being a seemingly good man and leader to a mass murdering undead necromancer who seemingly began committing atrocity after atrocity as soon as her tomb was shut. He destroyed her home, her community and everyone in it, and defiled everything she has ever held dear. Apparently for her, even.
She has basically no answers for how any of this happened or what is going on, she just flees and hides until she can create a sanctuary for people who seem more or less to stumble in the dark too.
Like all of that has to be terribly confusing and consuming her mind, but that would only be made worse by her learning about Aylin.
Because Aylin isn’t supposed to die.
Isobel is supposed to be the one that would die one day. Aylin is immortal. They both knew this. Everyone that knew about them knew this. But then suddenly she’s waking up 100 years later in a very different world to her very changed father telling her that Aylin is dead.
It’s impossible, but looking at everything else that seemed to happen while she was “sleeping,” maybe it isn’t. Maybe Aylin is dead. Maybe somehow her immortal demigod mate died.
But maybe not
The only thing telling her that Aylin died is Ketheric who is now very clearly an unreliable source. Maybe he’s right. Maybe he isn’t. She literally has no way to know.
So if Ketheric is lying, then where’s Aylin? Did she somehow become corrupted like everything else she used to love? Is she being held prisoner? Did she just leave and move on once Isobel died? Again, she has little to indicate what could have happened. For all she knows, Aylin is off somewhere being the love of some other cleric’s life. It’s been 100 years after all.
And the worst part is that she has two pieces of evidence on Aylin’s fate that seem to contradict each other. She has her father telling her that Aylin is long dead. Then she has Marcus. Someone that she knew and interacted with before you arrive at Last Light, arriving with a newly acquired set of wings. She doesn’t know where those wings came from, of course. But her father sends a goon to kidnap her with a set of wings they didn’t have even days ago? She would suspect the source. She would know that he was being intentional about that. So where would he have gotten a fresh set of wings if the only angel around was long dead?
While Aylin is no doubt like tragic in this situation, she never ever had reason to hope Isobel was alive. She never suspects it. All of her angst around Isobel is mourning and vengeance.
Isobel on the other hand has no idea what happened to Aylin. Aylin isn’t supposed to be able to die, and yet she’s dead. She’s supposed to be dead, yet Ketheric seems to be getting fresh body parts from her. He seems to be doing that, but it could be lies to trick her. Aylin might be alive and well. Aylin might be dead. Aylin might be evil and corrupted. Aylin might be helping Ketheric for all she knows. Isobel has no way of knowing anything and the worst part is, she can’t go try to figure it out.
If she leaves, everyone in the inn will die. Even if she somehow can leave without innocents dying, she can’t put herself anywhere near Ketheric since he clearly seems willing to hurt her emotionally now. He’ll probably do more the next time he has a chance. Who knows what he would do to make her stay if she went looking for answers there. Who knows what damage he could do if she gets the one thing he wanted.
Literally all Isobel can do is sit at the inn and pray to Selune for answers, or better yet for Aylin.
But Selune doesn’t seem to be providing the answers she wants, and if you play as a Selunite, Isobel hints at how much that is angering her.
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Olalla Chapter Nine
Josh Kiszka x f!OC x Jake Kiszka 5.569 words
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, intended for adult readers. Any resemblance to real persons is purely coincidental. Also, if you're under 18, go find some other entertainment elsewhere.
Warnings (are spoilers): phone sex, masturbation, LGBT themes, mentions of infidelity, anxiety, betrayal&trust issues, secrets, overall a healthy dose of emotional shit as always
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Previous chapter Olalla masterpost
Over the mountains, woods and valleys two guys fought with shepherd's axes. Hey guys! Stop fighting! The girl has two braids; you can share!
November 2025; Josh
He stood silent, but the contents of his mind were full of roaring memories of moments similar to this one. He could hear his younger and more carefree self shouting, almost as if someone played it in his in-ear. Can you feel iiiiiiit?
Exhilaration, stage fright, happiness, fear, anticipation…
All the emotions crammed into that fleeting, magical moment that lasts just a few seconds before everything bursts. The moment which ALL the souls and hearts in the large arena shared as one. He couldn’t see them yet, but their cries reverberated through the walls on their way from the green room to the stage and the volume reached the deafening level as soon as the band’s silhouettes appeared behind the semi opaque curtain.
There was no speech this time, no pre-recorded intro; just the sound of Sam’s Hammond organ that first started as a feeble hum, barely audible in the roaring mix of cries, clapping hands and stomping feet. Back to basics, while sticking to the most essential refinements.
The tones grew louder then, and Josh could feel them set the stage beneath his feet vibrating, which only added to his agitation. So glad to be back, and yet so anxious.
So much had changed in just one year, so many things that altered their course. The ‘Spring/Summer festival tour’ literally changed his life. He had loved, he had lost, he was now taking a path to the unknown, and it all left people wondering. His sudden disappearance and a subsequent injury started brand new rumors, and all the attempts to stop them from spreading felt like fighting Hydra. Eventually, they just stopped trying and focused on work, but now it made his guts clench again. Did they still love him? Would they still accept him, standing in front of them so vulnerable and naked? He knew some of them condemned him for what he had done, a few believed the lies about him, but thousands of them still came back.
He looked at Jake for reassurance, but found him crouched under his own heavy thoughts, while his hands followed Sam’s direction, adding more ringing notes to the whole cacophony of the tamed melody and tumultuous feelings.
Josh was on his own in this. He too looked down and smoothed a wrinkle on his new ebony satin wrap jacket. It hugged him around the waist and fell in smooth cascades around his hips. It was a perfect piece of garment, elegant when tied up, and frivolous-looking when he let it open. Unsure about it at first, he had gained some meat back during the last month, so he could now finally acknowledge that it really looked good on him. He put his chin up, both metaphorically and literally, and ran his fingers across the edges of the new dark brass laurel wreath that now decorated his head. It was a last minute addition, designed to hide the scar that was still visible under his patchy haircut. A deep breath in, and…
The curtain dropped.
... and the room exploded. He looked down and realized they had been just as nervous, and finally they could just let it all out. Raising his arms up in a simple gesture, he urged them to do it, and then welcomed him in return.
It was a wonderful song to open the show with. Just like with Heat Above, the initial tension grew until it was almost unbearable, only to be replaced by smooth harmonies and a soaring melody. However, they also experimented a bit more with this one, changing the tempo as well as the mood right where the chorus was supposed to be, hitting the listener right in the chest with its aggressive force. It was a perfect hymn for disturbing times, and the lyrics were Josh’s new prayer.
When it was over, Josh closed his eyes, panting, and tried to get ready for the next song. The initial high subsided and he was now painfully aware of his surroundings. The new setlist had been one of the main topics of the recent late night quarrels. Sam and Daniel wanted to continue with Safari, while Jake opposed the idea without being able to explain why. He got outvoted eventually and now it was his turn to play the initial chords.
Everything went smoothly until the first chorus. Josh turned slightly to the left, just like he had been used to doing, only to see Jake still standing at his side of the stage. He took one step forward, but Jake kept ignoring him. The audience noticed too, and he could see their frowned and confused faces as he continued to sing “why don’t you give some lovin’” and by that time it was painfully obvious that Jake wasn’t coming. One of the most notorious examples of their twin bond, one that started years ago as a telepathic need, was gone. Jake no longer wanted to sing that song together with him.
Thousands of miles away, still tucked in her warm bed, Agnieszka was watching the livestream.
Agnieszka
After she had followed all the accounts that promised to do the streaming, Agnieszka had set her alarm clock to 3:30 to make sure she wouldn’t miss a single minute of it. With her headphones on, a cup of strong coffee at hand and a wildly beating heart inside her chest, she joined thousands of the people in the arena and hundreds of others online as a silent voyeur.
While reading all those excited comments, she had no intention to join the live chat. She had even gone as far as to create new burner accounts everywhere, just to be able to keep tracks without being seen. She had already learned the power of gossip with the two of them still here, and things only got worse after they left, all because of one smudgy photo made by some fan from Warsaw.
It happened early on during their stay. The two of them were just helping Agnieszka with some groceries when a girl approached them and they reluctantly agreed to take a photo with her, well aware that things could get much worse if they refused. Much to everyone’s relief, nothing really happened afterwards, even though the picture circulated through the online space for a few days. It was just a photo of the guys “on vacation”, location unspecified, with both of them hiding under their hats and behind their sunglasses. They were probably just taking some time off after the recent media shitstorm, people concluded. Joshua needed to get out, and Jake was there to keep him company.
It was only after the fans started discussing possible reasons for and creating their own theories about Josh's mysterious injury and why the tour got postponed when the girl posted another photo on Reddit that ultimately caused a huge uproar. The picture showed the three of them leaving the supermarket, location specified, with her confirming that the dark-haired woman who seemed local was indeed there with them. And since it was a clear violation of the guys’ privacy, the girl got roasted for it immediately and deleted it shortly afterwards. But the harm was already done, the photo quickly appeared on other platforms and fueled people’s imagination.
Things got a bit out of hand in early October. At one point, she even martyrously tried to convince Joshua not to come back and just forget about their little affair, but he was adamant, unwilling to let anyone ruin his life any further.
And now Jake only made things worse. The fourth song just started, and the people in the chat were still discussing his strange behaviour. To say that it made Agnieszka feel uncomfortable would be an understatement. Of course she knew they were supposed to sing those lines together, as she had spent the last two months watching every video that there was. Official material, fan footage and old interviews became her everyday bedtime stories. She even fell asleep while listening to Joshua’s guided meditation a few times.
It always made her feel like an Alice in Wonderland, unable to comprehend how she came to know these talented and flamboyant people. She had dined with them, got drunk with them, kissed them and developed an intimate relationship with one of them.
Was there really any relationship at all? As those strangers kept wondering, they were asking questions to which she had no answers. No, she wasn’t lurking backstage; no, she didn’t know how he labeled himself, because she never cared to ask; and no, she had no idea what was going on between him and Jake.
Pcheh. Their ‘intimate’ relationship…
What was it, if not a folly?
Everytime she found a new gray hair – which seemed much more frequent after what happened up on Koscielec – Agnieszka would ask herself what am I doing? And then she would continue doing that. There were plenty of other men willing to be with her if she only let them, and she had the freedom to do it if or when the opportunity presented itself, but she just couldn’t. She kept waiting for the phone calls and Google Meet rendezvous.
One such face call was scheduled right for after the show. Agnieszka had to wait for Joshua to get back to the hotel, which would take a while, so she just lay back on the pillow and enjoyed the moment of peace, as well as the warmth of her soft comforter. The house was now half empty and eerily quiet during early hours. No one wanted an early breakfast at this time of year; the few adventurous hikers and alpinists who dared to conquer the icy trails mostly kept to themselves. A calm before the Christmas storm, one would say.
Even the sounds of the waking town coming from the outside were strangely muffled by the falling snow. Minutes dragged, and boredom and restlessness started to set. Agnieszka tried to kill the time by watching other newly posted videos from the show that just ended.
Eventually, she dozed off waiting…
She was walking along the ridge that separated the northeastern valleys from the southwestern ones. It was a dangerous path between two seemingly different worlds, covered with frost and ice, forcing her to consider every step carefully. To her left, everything was sprinkled with white and with mist lurking at stony rims. To her right, where the hillside was blessed with more sunshine, the autumn still kept flaunting its fiery colours. The setting sun behind her back illuminated the landscape and enhanced the visible split of seasons.
Agnieszka couldn’t tell how she got up there. Just a moment ago, she was safe in the warm bed, awaiting a new day, from which she now couldn’t remember anything. The only thing was certain – the winter was coming and once again, another sun-like light appeared on the eastern horizon, disrupting the age-old alternation of day and night and sending chills down her spine.
She heard three voices calling her name simultaneously.
Together, it created an unearthly sound… then suddenly, their voices turned to deafening ringtones…
Olalla
Veela
Neszka
Agnieszka needed to take a few seconds to find out where she was and what happened. With the sleepy haze still clouding her brain, she looked around to see that the sky outside turned to steely blue, making outlines of furniture in her bedroom already visible. The phone, which she still held in her hand, kept on buzzing.
Still feeling weird from the recurring and yet ever changing dream, she pressed the accept button, squinting at the oppressively bright screen. Sexy…
Joshua, on the other hand, was his usual flawless and charming self: freshly-showered, rosy-cheeked and with his short damp curls slicked back. “Oh, hello darl… did I wake you up? I thought you said you were going to…”
“Oh yeah, yeah, I was. I just fell back to sleep after the livestream ended, I guess. But I saw everything,” she responded groggily while rubbing her left eye, before she adjusted the pillow behind her so that she could sit.
“Oh, cool. It was a hell of a show, wasn’t it.” He greeted her with his usual bright, toothy smile, but Joshua’s face was an open book and Agnieszka already knew that face she caught a glimpse of behind the smiley mask quite well – when she could read a lot of conflicting things in his eyes, all of them centering around uncertainty and self-doubt. A simple twitch of an eyebrow always gave him away. She knew how nervous he was; he had confided to her prior to the show.. It was the first US show since he got outed and his personal life became a tabloid shitshow. And while the band was indeed greeted with rapturous ovations and they did put on a ‘hell of a show’, the undercurrent of doubt on both sides ran deep and the fact that his own brother seemingly threw him under the bus right when he felt the most vulnerable didn’t help at all.
False consolations were not her nature. “Joshua… when I said I saw everything, I really meant everything.”
He sighed and started rubbing the back of his neck. “Was it that obvious?”
“What? That something is obviously going on between the two of you? Yeah, I would say so. At least to everyone who’s familiar with your stage behaviour. It shouldn’t be a big deal, I suppose, but I saw your face, and so did everyone else. It was pretty clear you didn’t expect that. The people in the chat spent the next half an hour making assumptions. Some of them even mentioned the ‘dark haired stranger’ that allegedly drove a wedge between the two of you.” She added the last sentence for comedic effect; to lighten the mood a bit. However, it had the opposite effect and Joshua’s face turned to stone.
“Well, you shouldn’t really worry about that.” He sounded strangled, and for the first time turned his gaze off the screen.
“Are you ok, Joshua?”
“Yeah! Yeah…totally fine,” he replied absentmindedly. “We’ve had a few disagreements, but it’s nothing serious. Promise. I, eh… I wish you were here, sweetheart… So, anyway, what did you think of that lill’ insertion after Danny’s drum solo, birthday girl?” he chuckled, trying to change the subject.
“You mean ‘My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean’? Yeah, that was very subtle. Everyone thought so…” She didn’t even try to hide the annoyance in her voice, unable to comprehend how he could think that it was a good idea. Obviously, he didn’t share the sentiment.
“Well, I did that on purpose. And since people already talk… Well, I just hoped you’d like it. So, how was your special day?”
“Pretty uneventful, just like all the other days here.” As it always was. She stopped celebrating her birthdays a long time ago. Joshua was probably the only person on Earth who tried to make a big deal of the uninteresting fact that she was now thirty three. Well, him and Maya. “I went for a walk, I got a new backpack, I actually had a massage…that was nice and pleasant… and I got my IUD replaced… that was much less pleasant.”
“Well good to know!” He made another funny face and she had to laugh back. Most of her former lovers would be grossed out by the bold remark, but not him. He was just… different.
For example, he couldn’t just sit still, which was in fact often pretty cool and entertaining during their face call as he always inadvertently gave her a tour of whatever place he was currently at. So, as he walked around, she could see glimpses of his suite. “Wow, that’s a fancy hotel room. Very different from the dingy attic one.”
“And cold,” Joshua replied irritably. “It’s really the worst part of the deal, to be honest, and no amount of luxury could possibly change that. I’d give anything to be back in that snug attic room if it meant I could feel your soft skin again.”
“Soft…”
“Yeah, like satin. Go on and touch it if you don’t believe me.” With that, he finally hopped on his bed and leaned his back against the headboard. He must have untied his bathrobe in the process, as she could see his bare chest now, knowing too well where this was going. They had tried a few times in the past and always ended up giggling. Yet he kept on trying. “Are you naked?”
“Hell no! It’s November. I’m wearing button-up pajamas.”
“Unbutton it then.”
She couldn’t help but laugh. His incessant attempts to coax her into having phone sex with him were always so… cute. “I think I’ll need a bit more convincing.”
He closed his eyes and exhaled harshly. Agnieszka couldn’t see his other hand, but she knew very well where it was. “I’m imagining your palms right now, so callous and coarse from all the hard and honest work, like the finest sandpaper…”
She was just getting comfy and he made her burst out laughing again. “You’re an idiot.”
He chuckled with her. “All right, all right, let’s try again. I was serious about your skin. So soft and warm, and when my fingers travel further down… come on, travel with me… it feels like a velvety cushion, and it smells like honey and hay. Can you feel it too, baby?”
“Yes,” she moaned involuntarily. Hearing him talk about it like that really did create a good illusion. “I imagine your fingers. Say more, because I swear I can almost feel them”.
He was breathing heavily now, which turned her on even more. He told her more about the things he’d do and she followed his directions, sliding her middle finger inside. “I wish I could touch your cock.”
“And I’d give anything to feel your lips around it right now…”
She bit her lip when the question popped up in her head. It wasn’t the first time, but she never mustered enough courage, until now. Still not sure if it was ok to ask that, she took a deep breath first. “Do you ever imagine a man doing it to you, Joshua? I mean, do you still…?”
He seemed unfazed, just a little annoyed. “Why are you asking me now?”
“I think it’s sexy,” she cooed. “Besides, if this is supposed to work, we shouldn’t keep secrets from each other.” Saying that, she felt a pang of guilt even before she finished the sentence.
“Sexy, you say?” he asked huskily and she could hear the unmistakable sound of slapping flesh. Judging by the movement of his shoulder, it was more than apparent what he was doing. It made her heart beat wildly. If only she could be there with him…
“Yeah… you were always in control when we were together, hardly ever letting me take the lead, even when I wanted to. And I just wondered…because…” The sound of him clearing his throat interrupted her in mid-sentence.
“It just felt natural. You’re so delicate, like baby deer…”
“No, I’m not…”
“Yes, you are, baby. Compared to most of my previous lovers, you are… You’re strong, but still a flower… I just…just can’t stop looking at you… So, erhhm, to answer your question - yes, I do.”
This was all strangely exciting.
“Tell me more.”
“Are you still touching yourself?”
She was. Because she didn’t lie. It made her slightly anxious, but the fact that the idea also turned her on couldn’t be denied. Also, learning to know his desires seemed like the best policy against the anxiety which was almost crippling at times, and today was no different. Seeing him wrapped in satin, adored by hundreds of people, and not all of them women, made her feel like an onlooker, forced to remain in the distance. She didn’t want that.
And so he told her, with reluctance at first, but seeing that she didn’t stop and wanted more, he went on. Slowly, they guided each other towards their respective climaxes. Even though separated by thousands of miles, for a split second they felt closer to each other than before in the aftermath.
“What time is it there right now?” he asked groggily after a while, when she could no longer hide her weariness and yawned expressively.
“Almost eight thirty.”
“Can you perhaps go back to sleep for a while.”
“I guess so.” She had no real responsibilities until after lunch, so the idea of staying in bed for a while seemed quite agreeable.
“I think you should, then. And I should try to get some sleep as well. See you soon, love.”
“Good night, Joshua.”
Agnieszka tried to follow his advice, but after a while, she grabbed her phone again, quite sure that a certain person wasn’t asleep just yet…
Jake
Jake in fact did try to go to bed early-ish this time. He also tried everything that was supposed to help him accomplish this special mission. He had a few drinks, a soothing shower, late night sex… and if that wasn’t enough, skin-to-skin cuddles were expected to do the trick.
However, half an hour later, his mind was still racing, and it had nothing to do with the person now sleeping so peacefully right next to him. The person who – in fact – was also the one who had tried to persuade him that he should improve his sleeping habits. Women. So, instead of grabbing a guitar or a book, he was now lying in the darkness, watching city lights painting pictograms on the ceiling above him. He didn’t dare leave the bed, afraid that it would wake Lisa.
Suddenly, his phone lightened up with a familiar notification. He kept most of them muted, so he knew immediately. And surely enough…
Veela: Care to explain what the hell happened?
Jake knew immediately what she meant, and it made him feel both pleased and angry with himself at the same time. What the hell happened, indeed. It wasn’t deliberate. It wasn’t out of spite. He just didn’t want to play the song. And he certainly didn’t want to sing it… with Josh, no less! For years, it had been ‘their’ song, and it didn’t mean anything else. They wrote it before Josh really started caring about the meaning of the lyrics he was writing. The stupid ditty suddenly got a brand new meaning and Jake just couldn’t stomach it.
He certainly didn’t want to make people wonder, or to make her angry… or maybe he did? Either way, there was no way out.
He quickly scrambled out of bed – afraid that he would wake Lisa – and took the phone with him to the bathroom where he sat on a closed toilet seat, feeling sneaky.
Kuba Starlight: “I just wasn’t in the mood for singing, thats all. No big deal.”
The response was immediate.
Veela: Is that the only reason?
His thumbs hovered above the keypad for several seconds before he finally typed a brief answer.
Kuba Starlight: Yes.
He watched the three dots moving while rubbing his chin, anxiously awaiting her next jab. It took her a while, leaving him wondering what kind of indictment she was drafting.
Veela: Because I just talked to him and it didn’t seem like a “no big deal” to him. And people noticed too. It’s no.1 gossip right now. I’m slightly jealous. You’re trying to steal my spotlight, no doubt. :p
The last remark made him smile. Perhaps she wasn’t that angry after all.
And so am I, he thought. Wonder how you did it.
Kuba Starlight: People will always talk. One day I forget to comb my hair and the next day they start a rumor that I’m a depressed drunk.
Kuba Starlight: Josh is quite oversensitive these days.
He expected her to continue pestering him about the stupid ‘stage incident’, but she switched back to her caring and understanding (and nosy) self instead.
Kuba Starlight: In fact, I have.
Veela: You shouldn’t blame him.
Veela: I know you were worried about the show too. Maybe you two should just… talk?
Veela: What about my previous suggestion? The room is still available.
Veela: I just really don’t think you should spend Christmas alone. Unless you’ve found someone to spend it with…
He couldn’t even tell why answering truthfully suddenly made him feel so irritable. Perhaps because he wasn’t really truthful.
Kuba Starlight: Nothing serious. Just a casual acquaintance.
Veela: OK. That’s good news.
Is it?! He watched – all hopeful – as the three dots appeared again.
Veela: It might get serious eventually. You never know. :)
That only made him feel worse. And there were no more dots after that. Obviously, she dropped the subject, which in turn made his stomach drop. It was always like that, with him being torn between ‘honey, don’t feed me’ and ‘why aren’t you talking to me?’ She was convinced they were friends – bless her heart… and damn his. He kept feeding her this idea only to keep in contact with her, knowing too well it was both self-destructive and toxic.
He shouldn’t want her to keep persuading him; he in fact shouldn’t be having this conversation in the first place, but that wretched creature inside his head always prevailed. The truth was that he had considered her suggestion – his heart even skipped a beat when she first mentioned it as a possibility – and the wretched creature wanted him to say yes.
It was right after right after Josh casually informed her that their parents were taking a long-desired trip during Christmas, and she immediately thought about him being left alone, bless her big heart.
So yes, he wanted to say yes, it just wasn’t justifiable up until recently. Now he had a perfect excuse, so he quickly started typing another message.
He re-read the blabbery he just sent and groaned again, loudly this time. Not only because he didn’t really think it through yet, it was still just a vague idea. But also because of all those typos he always made when he was in a rush.
Kuba Starlight: But she asked me if we could go sking, so maybe we could come together.
Kuba Starlight: You know… to keep an eye on him.
Kuba Starlight: Not that I don’t trust you… but, you know…
Kuba Starlight: But don’t worry about our stay. I’ll find us something else. Somthing with jacuzzi and champange.
And she never commented on it. She never judged him.
Veela: :D
Veela: Oukey then! I’ll be happy to see you again. And to meet your new girl.
December 18th 2025, Nashville; Josh
They made it. The first part of the tour successfully completed, Christmas was finally here and the atmosphere in the city already satiated with the holiday mood. Just a few more days… and then he would see her again.
There was one last thing that Josh desperately needed to do, and so far it had prevented him from being able to join and enjoy the festivities. He had been sitting in their favorite cafeteria for more than an hour now, more and more convinced that he had been stood up. The idea weighed like a huge stone on his chest and it grew heavier with each passing minute.
But at last, he appeared. Effortlessly charismatic as always. Lean and tall, with his hair neatly braided this time. He spotted Josh immediately, but remained standing by the door for a few excruciatingly long seconds before he finally made his way towards Josh’s table.
Josh stood up and made one hesitant step forward, but Christopher quickly stopped him with his outstretched palm. A simple gesture that felt like having a bucketful of icy water tipped over his head.
Josh knew that it was absolutely foolish to hope for a hug, but after all those years, it was just like a conditioned reflex. He had spent so much time hugging that man that it seemed unnatural not to do it, even under the current circumstances… “Please, at least sit.” He sounded defeated.
Christopher took the chair opposite to Josh and leaned back with his arms crossed. It wasn’t going to be easy, that was certain. “Ok, spill. What do you want?”
“I… the idea that I’d never see you again was just unbearable…I mean…”
Christopher cocked his brow exasperatedly. “Spare me.”
Josh started to panic. It was so hard to tame the thoughts in his head so that he could transform them into a coherent sentence. Christopher was well aware, but also unwilling to make it any easier for him. Josh had spent hours looking into those eyes. Somewhere behind them, there used to be a place that felt like home. Now he could clearly see that he was no longer welcome there. So, instead of trespassing, he lowered his eyes and opted to tell it to the coffee cup. “No… I mean, without, eh, I cou..couldn’t stand not to see you again and…and not to tell you how sorry I am.”
A few more excruciating seconds passed before he dared to look up again. Christopher was rubbing his lower lip with the tips of his fingers – something he always did when he was searching for the right words. The silence made Josh’s chest tighten.
“I gave you quite a lot of freedom,” Christopher said at last.
“I know…”
“And you said you’d never do anything that would hurt me. And I trusted you.”
“I know…”
“And you betrayed that trust… twice!”
“We were no longer together when I… I didn’t expect you to…” The sound of Christopher’s palm slapping the wooden desk right in front of Josh made him jump.
“YOU TOLD ME…” Christopher raised his voice menacingly, but quickly tried to calm himself down when he saw Josh’s startled stare. They were in public, after all. He knew the rules, and it affected him too now. So, he took a deep breath before he continued: “You told me that it was not even a possibility, so naturally, I feel like everything you EVER said was a lie.”
“I didn’t lie. I…I didn’t know it was a possibility, Taffy,” Josh’s voice faltered. He squeezed his eyes shut in an attempt to fight off the stinging sensation, but it was no use. He was crying. “I’m so sorry,” he sobbed. They sat silent for several seconds; thankfully, it was enough for Josh to pull himself together and Christopher mercifully granted him that luxury.
“The thing that happened with David…,” Josh cleared his throat and continued, fully determined to say everything he wanted to: “I know no apology could even make it right. The worst thing is that it really meant nothing. I feel like I’ve lost control of my life even since, which…I guess…I fully deserve. Like a drunken boat. You remember the poem? And now she… she’s both the anchor and the sea. And it happened so fast. I… when you came to the hospital with mom and Jake, I felt like being stuck between two cogwheels. But the thing I said, it hasn’t changed. I never stopped loving you.”
Josh so desperately wanted him to understand it. Even if he would never see him again, even though he knew Christopher didn’t want to accept it, Josh just needed him to understand that some people are like tattoos, and there’s always enough space for more than one. Sweet Olalla understood…
Christopher slowly leaned forward and, with his elbows now on the table, he put his hand together and started rubbing his lip against the fingertips once more. Josh waited patiently. Whatever the outcome, at least he knew Taffy was giving it a thought.
“How’s your head? Are you well?” he finally said.
Josh looked at him in confusion. Did Christopher think he’d gone mental? “I…yeah, it’s healed pretty nicely. I still have headaches sometimes, but… why?”
Christopher took a deep breath. “Because I’ve been fucking worried, jerk!”
December 22nd, Zakopane; Agnieszka
Just like the last time, she was restless since the early morning. But unlike the last time, she didn’t spend hours waiting in the freezing cold. Also, no separate room for him this time. Joshua was just going to stay with her. Eulalia was basically home to him now.
Jake and his girl rented a private chalet on the opposite hill, right next the main ski slope. He was supposed to drop Joshua around five and then they’d all meet in town for dinner later. That was the plan.
It was already half past five when the bell above the main door finally chimed and a familiar figure stepped inside. She quickly jumped out of her seat behind the reception desk and ran right into his arms, nearly knocking him off.
“Ugh, sweet girl, easy!” he chuckled, hugging her back. He buried his face in her hair and stayed that way for several seconds, which wasn’t strange at all. However, she soon began to wonder about how silent he was… that was definitely strange.
Breaking the embrace at last, she was finally able to take a good look at him… and froze.
There was a nasty bruise on the left side of his chin, and his lower lip was split and swollen, making him look like he had been in a fist fight.
“Joshua, what the hell happened?”
@thewritingbeforesunrise @fleet-of-fiction @writingcold @lvnterninthenight @its-interesting-van-kleep @takenbythemadness @edgingthedarkness @myownparadise96 @gvfstuddedmajesty @josh-iamyour-mama @jazzyfigz @tripthelightfantastix @sanguinebats @wetkleenex-gvf @peaceloveunitygvf @kiszkas-canvas @fleetingjake @lizzys-sunflower @hollyco @emojakekiszka @gvfmarge @dayumclarizzel @lipstickitty @clownstarr @musicislove3389 @i-love-gvf @blankvz @psychedelectable
#gretavanfleet#greta van fic#greta van smut#gvf smut#gvf fanfiction#gvf#greta van fleet fan fic#greta van fleet fan fiction#greta van fleet fanfic#greta van fluff#josh kiszka fanfic#josh kiszka#josh gvf fic#josh gvf#jake kiszka fanfic#jake kiszka#josh kiszka smut#joshua michael kiszka#josh kiszka x reader#jake kiskza x reader#Spotify
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Changbin's special present for STAY
Bonus under the cut
#stray kids#seo changbin#createskz#bystay#staysource#kpopco#seochangbinet#3rachasource#usersa#apparently there's issues with tags so hopefully they all work#my first gifset :)#i actually posted this last night but deleted it bc i forgot the watermarks#anyway this is all thanks to sa and her patience and kindness#literally only made this set for the last one#my gifs
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#ok but fr marking undergrad essays is such a rollercoaster#i gave two very high marks today and was genuinely impressed and then the next three i marked were practically incoherent#one just copy and pasted their intro instead of writing a conclusion. like it's verbatim the same paragraph#i dont mark down for minor grammar and syntax errors because there's a high rate of ESL students...#... but some of the papers from native english speakers have me more concerned about functional illiteracy than I've ever been#these are 19-20yos in a humanities field at a top university! even the highest scoring essay had basic basic grammar errors and vocab misuse#at least i could tell what the student was trying to say there but some of the others...#if your punctuation and spelling and syntax are all so bad that i literally cant tell what you're trying to say there is a serious problem#even setting aside how many errors like these there were there's the flip side of the issue: actually writing an essay#the last one i marked yesterday had no structure or thesis or secondary sources#everything between the intro and conclusion was the same claim phrased in different ways with some irrelevant non sequitur quotes thrown in#no analysis other than the words 'analysis of this shows' which is *gasp* not a substitute for analysis#OH AND OMG#one made a direct claim about a figure's political stance and attached a footnote. i went to see what the student's source was.#the footnote literally said something like 'i know i should have a source here but it's only context and i don't want to waste my word count#like what???? do you think claims about relevant context don't need evidence??? and the audacity to not give a citation...#... and claim it's because it would take too many words away from your main argument??#just providing the actual citation for the claim would have been 3-5 words max but the footnote about not having room was 30 words#kid do you think i can't tell that you dont have that citation? do you think anyone's buying that you didn't include it to save space?#it's the very first footnote and most of the others are full-length bibliography entries jammed into the footnotes (which we don't require)#so either you were 'worried about space' at the first footnote then changed your mind as you wasted 250 words on unnecessary formatting#or you were over the word limit and were like 'gotta cut something!' and the only footnote you 'simplified for space' was a short basic one#^assuming i believed you. which i dont. because why would you think that would fool anyone.#i still have half the essays left. im tired and so disappointed in how little we're told we should expect from them
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casey also talks about sepang 2015 what do you think of that
oh in that podcast? uh... lemme listen again...
yeah idk it's not really anything new I'd say? he's said basically all the same stuff in more interesting and extensive ways elsewhere. I think casey inevitably has a very 'well feuding is bad and helps nobody' point of view, has expressed that before in the past, does it here again, and he's also drawn a parallel between himself and marc on several occasions. which... well, of course there's similarities in terms of public discourse or whatever, but the parallel really falls apart whenever casey argues the feuds cost valentino. like, I do think it's sometimes important to just. keep in mind. it's interesting that casey draws this comparison in his mind but that doesn't necessarily means he's right about this. I'm not sure how you'd argue that starting a feud with casey cost valentino anything competitively? you can argue it didn't help him I guess, and then we can have a debate about the ins and outs of the 2008 season. we can also have an argument that in a hypothetical world where casey isn't ill in 2009, valentino doesn't break his leg and casey isn't on a piece of junk in 2010, and valentino isn't on a piece of junk in 2011-12, then actually maybe valentino sparking open animosity with casey COULD have cost him. but we don't know that! didn't happen! I wish we could have found out, but we never got the chance! as it stands, the tally on this is pretty straightforward: casey won the title when things were reasonably civil between them in 2007, and valentino took control of the following season at the exact moment he worsened the relationship between the pair of them in 2008. obviously, it's all more complicated than that and casey would of course argue laguna didn't negatively affect his subsequent performances... but it certainly didn't help them. like, at the very worst valentino escalating tensions in 2008 is a complete net neutral. after 2009, them being bitchy to each other every other tuesday was completely competitively irrelevant beyond maybe affecting how they approached occasionally fighting for a podium position. hey, maybe casey used that feud to fire himself up through sheer spite throughout the later stages of his career, but that doesn't actually support his anti-feud stance - it's basically the exact same thing as what valentino does. they're both quite similar in that regard! always so hungry to prove a point, to show how someone else is wrong. kinda half the point with this feuding business is to get yourself going, get yourself motivated, yeah. he straight up openly admits to using yamaha's repeat rejection of him as a way of giving himself motivation, and at the end of the day that's really not all that different?
anyway, what else does casey say... oh yeah, that him and the other aliens were already kinda prepared for this and had learned vale's tricks. that valentino had only been able to get into the minds of the previous generation. welllllll *wiggles hand* sure, I mean, he did clearly have to change his approach... he couldn't just use the exact same playbook to get to them, either on-track or off-track. but that's why he did change up the playbook... again, whether you want to believe valentino won his final two titles 'in the head' rather than just through pure pace kinda depends on how you assess the evidence, but it is at the very least a debate. and, y'know, it's always worth remembering that valentino's most important mind games with casey didn't happen in a press conference... it was on the track. and the on-track stuff really is just embedded in how valentino approaches winning. speaking of aliens, this is what dani and jorge have said:
like, valentino's entire approach to his riding, even to the way he's setting his bike up, is deliberately about directly fucking with you... he's not actually always trying to be faster than you as much as he's trying to give himself the tools to make your life miserable, to pressure you into mistakes, etc etc... and again, especially with casey (if anything because he was so mentally sturdy), the off-track stuff was really just window dressing. (I know they bicker a lot after 2009 but it's just so fundamentally irrelevant to actual on-track competition.) so you can be aware of those tricks, but it also doesn't necessarily help you when someone's being nasty to you on-track in a way you just fully do not enjoy. which is what it was like for casey! for casey, a lot of this comes back to the truly unpleasant context of how he was perceived by the public, how he was treated as mentally weak or 'broken' or whatever partly because he had the misfortune of coming up against a bloke who had the reputation for breaking rivals. I think it's quite natural to end up with a bit of a hardliner 'actually I've never been mentally affected by a result in my life' stance - and of course casey is a lot tougher than a lot of people give him credit for. that being said. sometimes your rivals affect you, shit happens, it's part of the game. it's fundamentally a nice idea to think that valentino's tactics weren't just morally wrong but also ineffective, which is kind of the appeal of this narrative, right? you want to believe you're above that, you want to believe you were adequately prepared and wise to valentino's tactic. it's unsurprising and understandable that casey does tend to tell the story that way, but again it's *wiggles hand* also hard to describe it as completely factual
uh. what else. oh I'm thrilled casey does canonically know valentino and marc were friends, he has said he wasn't following motogp too much during that time period so you couldn't be sure of that. does this mean anything? does it tell you anything? well, no, but it's just a pleasing thought to me. I like that. oh also 'provoking particularly aggressive riders isn't a good idea' is kinda a funny take from casey? like, he of all people would hate the idea of being cowed by someone's reputation like that... casey's right that provoking fast riders can potentially be dangerous, but y'know I do think that's probably not news to anyone almost nine years later. um. that's all I've got I think
#i will say idm getting asks like this AT ALL but i do hope that's not like. the only bit of the podcast people are paying attention to#my thing with sepang 2015 takes is that like... when's the last time anyone has said anything genuinely interesting about that event#which yes big words from the feud blogger... but in fairness a lot of the sepang 2015 stuff is from old notes. that's my excuse idc#but that's kinda the thing... i feel like i haven't really had a new original thought about the whole drama for three plus years#u do kinda run out. basically the takes say more about the person saying them than about the actual event at this point#which. yeah. casey's comments on sepang '15 are primarily interesting in what they tell you about how he feels towards valentino#mind u he's actually quite nice about valentino in this one? casey call him let's finally organise that dinner#heretic tag#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#oh casey does go on another spiel against riders who win at all costs. ships that passed in the night of feuds i always say#also he gets the age he enters the premier class at wrong. i held myself back in the last post from pointing this out for tonal reasons#but if people want my podcast hot takes. i do simply have to mention it. just to set the record straight here#'they battle for podium places after 2009' genuinely. twice. like the alien era giveth but a lot of the time it really does just taketh#somewhat ironically casey wins the duel when he's on the shitty ducati and vale wins the duel when he's on the even shittier ducati#whatever that tells you idk#casey was always promising the laguna rematch would've gone differently and I love that conceptually but also we just don't know#he was like next time I WON'T play nice and it's like?? omg what does that look like. casey what were you cooking#for ethical reasons it's probably fine but for character arc reasons it's objectively ass that casey ended up being able to do all his -#- racing in a way he was entirely comfortable with for his second title in 2011. like it's just a complete waste of a year#you have this whole thing building for four years and then 2010 comes along and it's like. well that's enough narrative intrigue now! <3#also casey/jorge are fundamentally too interesting as individuals to have had such an obscenely boring on-track rivalry and yet here we are#it KILLS me because if you rearranged it and made valentino's dogshit ducati years like. 2009 or something#and do a straight title fight between jorge and casey THEN I genuinely think it would've been way more interesting#the problem with valentino is that he is fundamentally the WORST imaginable character you could invent to be casey's foil#literally everything about valentino could have been designed to be a casey-specific nightmare#but unfortunately that also makes him objectively the most interesting rival casey could have gotten#like morally it's on the edge. but narratively? literally could not have gotten a better villain in casey's story#constantly dancing on this faustian line of having to imitate valentino to beat him while trying not to lose yourself... juicy
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ok picture this. an ahura luna leer petras alecto comic set during/immediately after doti where the kids are like. Huh Haven't Heard From Mom In A While. n they gotta go figure out why gorgon isnt returning their calls and then get swept up into the Holy Shit bc they get to attilan somehow and see how completely destroyed it is. i havent thought of it much past that but cue the looking for dad typical comic. and thats whag i want for the inhumans rn. i crave a 2nd gen (? if the kids can count as that) centric comic so bad :(
#obvs alecto wouldnt be too on board. like maybe she only gets involved bc petras#or she isnt really too interested until the discovery of attilan being a bunch of rocks and bodies#alecto has a lot of potential right there especially as a critic of the typical attilan hierarchy and culture (? or like. you know.#The Known Inhumans Issues. idk how to describe it rn im tired as shit rn)#and alecto is cool and i love her and i want her back so bad i need her to be sooo mean to gorgon#she needs to make gorgon regret he was born. literally she deserves to beat him up alecto was put through so much shit#like on one hand i kind of love to imagine she made a clean break and just Does Not talk to any of them and wjll never ever again bc that is#definitely good for her and completely understandable bc HOLY SHIT.#but also i think she should kill gorgon. just a bit.#literally why did gorgon survive doti over triton. my beloved fish man is so much cooler and hotter#like hes also complicit in the Known Inhumans Issues but he also a fish#i mostly just really wanna see alecto again. but also pleaseeee i need leer and petras to have even a little bit of a personality#half of those kids have never interacted with each other!!! what!!!!#also ahura being a chaperone to a bunch of kids he absolutely despises is the funniest thing to do with him and i love that ff#did that a bit with him. bring annoyed slightly trampled applesauce BACK.#and luna is tragically underused and her powers are cool as shit and marvel PLEASE let her do something other than be 11 its been so long#ahura boltagon#luna maxmimoff#alecto petragon#petras petragon#leer inhumans#leer mander azur#? ok not actually sure how set in stone any of these last names are now that i think about it#inhumans
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So I hit my 700th edit for the WHA wiki today, because I am a totally normal person
#For the record I have been there for. 27 days.#That makes an average of 26 edits a day which is even more terrifying because I definitely was not updating every day#Also this is for the Telepedia Wiki not the Fandom one#Anyway you should check it out!#In maybe a week because the website cache is super slow for some reason when you're not logged in#But I'm having fun#The nice thing about working on a wiki where there's actually other people doing stuff#Is that they can do the boring stuff like character bios and etc while I run around doing the fun stuff like pages on animals and plants#Anyway I was working on the Eldroxen page which are the big fluffy ox from the Silver Eve Procession#And it was so funny collecting info on them from the main series and then checking Kitchen real quick and SURPRISE! THEY'RE EATING IT!#I mean I should have expected this after having watched Dungeon Meshi and yet~~~#Also funny was that I copy+pasted the page coding for one the (food) animals as a template for this giant Mole-worm beast page but#forgot to remove the line about it being for food and afterwards had a laugh and then removed it#But now I'm like. They probably WOULD eat that sucker. Giant mole worm/snake/dragon thing? That'd feed a whole town!#Qifrey could have an entire audience watching how he'd prepare and season it#Anyway if you've been wondering where I've been that's it#Also funny story: during the Covid pandemic I stayed employed when my coworkers got let go because they needed me to catalogue an entire#new set of guided reading books; and have these sets have a digital checkout instead of the old-school card catalog we were literally still#using in 2020. Anyway I went all out with the organization of the books and the boxes and even made a reference binder for the books#via subject so teachers/tutors could find specific subjects and reading levels etc#(I'd have done a digital way to search for results but honestly half the teachers couldn't figure out how to sign in to the laptop. So.)#Anyway. Only a handful of teachers actually used these books and two years later the school switched to a new reading program#that came with its own set of books and lessons so this 10k reading set was essentially unneeded (and my dear coworkers never got rehired)#Anyway I learned last week that they're clearing out that room and all of those barely-used books are getting thrown out 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃#Isn't that funny#Literally everything is just sandcastles built in the surf#I'm so glad I already accepted this during my pumpkin carving years because otherwise I think I'd be upset#Anyway I'm gonna go play my spooky fishing game
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We are just now realizing that still being on the short list of kitten fosterers means that we're going to be having to handle weaning five 3-4 week old kittens that need to be fed every few hours while also having university four to six hours a day and honestly, that's not going to be very fun. We'd say "maybe we should have taken on less art challenges this year" but honestly we've been having a great time with the art challenges it's just the 4-6 hours of school that's been rapidly eroding our soul
#we speak#one of them is still feral enough to hiss at us and we've already been overlapping Older Kitten Socialization with our other junk#god. you don't realize how much free time you have until you lose it we guess. this is why we've been unemployed for the past 4 years#...outside of the disability we mean#god. how did we survive this the first time. every time we attend any educational institution we gain so much sympathy for kids and teens#imagine having to go through this shit for eight hours a day AND no one respects your autonomy so you can't even leave#AND a bunch of places have bullshit laws that makes it a legitimate crime for you to not be trapped in a tiny box like this#for eight hours a day#man. yknow sometimes we see kids online being dumb or uneducated or whatever and think that theyre cunts#but then we remember how much of a blatant human rights violation a lot of school is and we're like. man.#sure it would help if any of them actually looked shit up but honestly children are failed by the school system to a massive extent#and it's a miracle that we made it out of our own school experience with as much willingness to learn as we did#because it's genuinely fun to acquire new skills and knowledge and the current school system is set up in such a way#that it literally creates a pathological avoidance to the things and environments that are taught in it#like man we loved math as a kid and then school crushed that out of us with a burning passion#and now we flounder with budgeting. both because of the need to use every single piece of everything and not Waste things from upbringing#and because trying to sit down and actually legitimately budget things is irreversibly associated with math from school#which has of course contributed to our current poor money habits where if we spend money on anything it has to Last#and if it can't Last then it haunts us for the next fifteen years#children should be allowed more leeway online not only because they are still learning how existing Works#but because everyone and their dog is determined to make it impossible for them to pick what they want to do with their bodies and lives#honestly we think it contributes to this current puritanism thing. need permission to do anything. need an authority#these kids arent ever given the chance to be themselves without being told what to do. no wonder they flounder without an authority figure
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i was tagged by @shadowglens and @risingsh0t to make some ocs in this picrew. thank you so much besties, i loved this picrew so much!! <3
vesper moxley (cp2077) • victoria gray (cp2077) joelle knight (fo4) • nina bower (fo4) selene (oblivion) • hiraeth (skyrim)
tagging: @uldwynsovs @arklay @devilbrakers @nuclearstorms @morvaris @girlbosselrond @indorilnerevarine @moiragf @cultistbase @faarkas @steelport @nokstella @reaperkiller @malefiicarum @brujah @calenhads @lightwardens @aelyosos and whoever else wants to do this or that i missed bc i'm terribly forgetful sorry!!
#tag games#warning i accidentally infodumped in the tags i'm sorry ignore me 😔 ckjsdhdskj#made this based on relationships idk why jdksd. victoria is vesper's bestie 4 life & first gf. joelle & nina my fave wlw married couple#and then for the last one. listen. i've resurected a very old oc and i'm still not so sure but i miss skyrim so bad. they idea is that#they are related as in hiraeth is a descent of selene bc i think dragonborn=martin septim's child> family line going forward until we#have our little hiraeth. i never thought of selene & martin having a kid in canon (only stupid ideas of an au) but u know. what if. she#still ends up in the shivering isles tho and becomes sheogorath. hiraeth's bloodline having like an emperor & a daedric prince. OK KING!!#much to think about tbh. not sure if they/she(probably he too. thinking of their gender as therapy for myself) will stick as nord or maybe#wood elf too like selene. or maybe even dunmer?? it makes no sense fjkdfhk IDK. literally i HAVE so much to think for them#also their name came to me bc i read the welsh word Hiraeth that basically means 'a mixture of longing yearning nostalgia homesickness'#+ 'an expression of an empty desire and grief over a past life or place' and with drangonborns i like to push the idea of 'maybe they were#actual dragons in a past life and now human' u know?? so i thought it was sooo fitting. i also like the idea of the more dragon souls#they absorb the more their features turn..dragonesque?? draconic jkfdhfkdsj idk i love them very much (:#(i have no idea how dragon in past life + martin's bloodline can fit but i'm literally only vibing rn)#i want to replay skyrim SO bad but i need someone to hold my hand so tightly as they help me set up mods for this game bc i never played#skyrim with mods (collective gasp) and i have no idea of what to pick ecc especially bc everything..breaks with a snap of fingers so yea ri#SORRY for talking so much i get excited about new things (my oc in this case) so easily..#oc: vesper#oc: victoria#oc: joelle#oc: nina#oc: selene#oc: hiraeth#ALSO FUCK OFF JOELLE IS SOOOOOOOOO CUTE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!
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always fun to remind myself of the side effects of my thyroid meds
#the first time i treated my thyroid my endo was like ‘i havent had a patient who had this happen for a while so im due for one’ THANKS MAN#personal#im just waiting for it to hurry up and work. my health has PLUMMETED in the last week or so#im so sick and i can’t DO ANYTHING. including SLEEP. even if i was getting enough good sleep i was be exhausted but i’m not so.#the energy’s doing Great#and i’m so hungry all the time but also nauseous so all food is unappealing#genuinely have no idea how i made it through years 7-10 undiagnosed. no wonder i ended up with such a severe phobia of going to bed????????#i don’t have to worry about routine right now so it’s not as stressful (just horrible because i’m so tired) but i COULDNT SLEEP back then#im just relieved that this time it was found through a routine check rather than me getting a test because of symptoms#usually i test when my anxiety gets really bad in a specific way#but my anxiety isn’t bad this time. no panic attacks and also no migraines. those are all usually the worst to deal with#so comparatively this isn’t even a particularly bad episode?/relapse?/flare?#still more sick than i’ve been in……..years?#im not sure if covid was better or worse. but it was only really bad for a week#this’ll be worse overall because it’ll last a lot longer#hopefully only a month or two but that’s still a few months of my life that just vanish. cool!!!!!!!!!!!#and there wasn’t even a notable event to trigger it this time. first time was whooping cough and subsequent times have been things like—#starting uni and then the last 2 years of uni where i took 10 units in one year then overworked myself doing my thesis#im SLIGHTLY worried that maybe i’ve developed rheumatoid arthritis and that set it off because it’s also autoimmune#i should see my gp soon to get a general antibody test. my joint have been so bad it’s been hard to walk for quite a few months#idk man it all sucks. but for now at least i have my white blood cells (even if they’re literally the problem lmao)
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The more I look back in the past, the more I sound like a grandma ngl. Cuz yeah sure nowadays there are more advanced stuff, but times back then were a lil simpler.
Like, a certain magical moment of my childhood is coming out of school, seeing the many shops right outside that can get crowded during the afternoon. Each shop sells toys, candy, trinkets, and whatever thing a kid might like for something cheap that anyone can buy. It's like magical in a way cuz after such a stressful day at school, I get to pass by the shops, look at the stuff they're selling, and actually get to buy a thing or two without worrying about the price.
#aria rants#as someone thats taught bout the value of money ever since i was young cuz my mom is hella strict with money#i was really frugal and careful with the money i was given. so much so id end up returning that money to my mom after the school year#and that was in the past around like 2009 before inflation inflated too much#like sure its knockoff stuff. with some painted wrong and the ones painted right got some of their paint over the line#and its completely made of plastic#but the model itself looks good enough for a kid who only cares to have a toy of their favourite game#even if it isnt smth so high quality. and also the fact that i get to buy that with money given to me?#it made me feel so good and excited cuz in my mind it was a toy that i got with my own hands#same with when i got my first pet! it was two hamsters (boy and girl) + their wheel and i bought em using my birthday money#when converted to usd all it costed me was 9 dollars. and the lil knockoff toys? convert to usd it'll literally be less than a dollar#now tho? thats impossible#those shops right out my old school? last i walked along that route. half of the shops were gone and that was#around years before covid happened cuz there were new regulations added that made it hard to set up stalls like that#its been years since i last visited a pet store but with how everything's prices had gone up unreasonably high#i wouldnt be surprised if there isnt anything that you can get for 9 dollars there anymore
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im about to be the most obnoxious bitch on earth about it but babygirl came home thank fucking GOD. my hardcore pregrinding was not for naught. how have i won 4 50/50s in a row. what is it about hydro bitches And Wriothesley
also team Throw The Literal Book At Em is real now thank god
#crow.txt#genshin#not writing#i fucking love himmmmm hes so funnnnnn#the only genshin player who has ever leveled frostbearer. just cause.#im gonna throw more wishes at him probably. just cause. c1 would be nice#i love him and his slutty demonias so bad. i have disease. im going to bite him in half#i literally had all his equipment leveled like a week before he was even gonna be out. had him lv 90 within like 20 mins#bc i needed like literally 3 boss mats and the second to last time i fought it it gave me 2 -_-#alternate names for that team. catalyst court. or just The Courtroom. ill level yanfei one of these days#why does he growl a little bit when he attacks. freak. im ill in my brain#i love that i got to be so damn picky with his artis. beautiful 0 def substats#my bait for him to come home was like. neuvi. i made myself tea just cause as a Joke. funny team to put him on. 4 50/50s would also be funn#my favorite number no less. the only funnier thing would be losing to mona. a 4th hydro bitch. and also i had all his stuff leveled#except Him. also his gay little aesthetically matching catalyst that is useful on literally nobody else. they were so real for this#ofc not his BIS but they made his design match. chef kiss#im also gonna get him a full blizzard strayer set. just for fun. for now he can steal rosarias. that domain is a cruel mistress
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I have an absolute perfect storm of a shift coming up in April and I can’t decide whether I should cancel it
#i’ll set the scene for you: 9th april. easter sunday. the cafe is going to be absolutely Mental that day i just know it#i am on shift with: my manager (who’s lovely but she will be in the office all day doing managerial shit unless it gets so busy we literally#can’t cope); another new girl (who’s fairly nice); and my most hated coworker (who made me cry last week)#and to cap it off: i’m probably going to get my period that day!!!!! or maybe the day before which would be even worse since it’s a saturday#and i’m also working that day#why did i so cavalierly say ‘yeah weekends work really well; give me weekend shifts’#i’ve gone ahead and figured out when all my future periods are and put a ‘DO NOT ACCEPT A SHIFT ON THIS DAY OR DAY BEFORE OR AFTER’#on my calendar on the expected day 1 of my period#i just don’t know what to do. because what if i cancel it (offer up my shift in the rota app) and then my period is late anyway#i would feel so stupid. and if i get it on the saturday there’s not much point cancelling sunday because yeah day 2 is still bad#but if i survive a day 1 at work i can survive a day 2#the demon on my shoulder is like ‘quit’ but i LIKE this job and more importantly i don’t want to go back to job hunting#i’ve spent the whole morning searching up like ‘how to survive your period at work’ and gotten Nothing Of Use lmao#it’s all aimed at people with desk jobs and girl if i was allowed to sit down that’d be like 90% of my problems gone immediately#should i just go on birth control. should i call the doctor while mabel has lunch and see if i can get in on friday#that might be the cheat code honestly. just straight up skip that period and get it the next week#BC does give me absolutely wild mood swings which is why i’m not on it but like.. surely there’s One out there that won’t mess me up#like i was on loestrin for about 4 years i think. rigevidon messed me up but surely it’s not the only one that’s appropriate for me??#i’ll try to call them soon. gotta feed mabel first#personal
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bruh I had a social for my club and my housemate ruined the vibes so bad like. The way I feel like I need to send out a mass apology for their behaviour now :////
#cy says stuff#personal#idk man they are an asshole and they were making everyone very uncomfortable#and it's like idk what to tell you you are being mean. i don't care if it's in the context of a game no one is having fun anymore#they literally made my other housemate cry because of how aggressive they were being about it#like how can you not tell you are literally ruining this for everyone bro#my friend texted me afterwards like YIKES and we were looking at each other like 👀👀 the entire night so that was reassuring#but yeah this is why I'm literally never home anymore because they are so draining to be around and all they do is cause problems LMAO#i will probably have to have a conversation about it but it's very difficult because I've already tried setting boundaries so many times#and if I didn't live with them i would literally cut them out so fast#last time i tried to set boundaries they were like ugh I'm so sorry but it totally wasn't a representation of who i actually am#like i was just having a really bad week :(((((#and I'm like that is not an excuse to be awful to your friends#if you are only a good friend when you're in a good mood and then take all your negative emotions out on the ppl around you#but yeah it's also hard because i genuinely do not want to continue this relationship but I'm renting with them at the moment#so I'm just avoiding them as much as possible#just like 🙄 it's so annoying#venting#rant
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