#literally my boyfriend of over a year | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

bucephaly · 8 days ago

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Amazing take on the dash tonight. 'I think most people actually don't want or value or need romantic affection or attachment and that most people are aro' uhhhhhhhhhhhh????

Also like. I'm p sure what constitutes the difference between romantic and platonic and sexual affection and attraction is purely cultural and different to everyone. I wish people would stop focusing so hard on the idea that these labels are like actual objectively true things about people. Like, would some people probably be happier without feeling forced to pursue relationships by society? Sure. But saying that most people are Actually Aromantic and that 'very few' people actually want or value romantic attachment ???? I'm honestly kinda tired of these like 'most people are Actually bi lol' 'most people are at least a Little ace!!' Etc etc type takes. 'No one is Actually cis' like can you shut upppppp these words are just WORDS for extremely abstract cultural concepts that mean different things to everyone yall do not need to take them this seriously. And im just so tired of people being like 'man knowing about this identity helped me, im sure Everyone feels like this and Everyone actually secretly hates this common thing' like uhhhh no. They don't. Lol.

#like. identifying as aroace in highschool [starting at 14] and then continuing for years #actually royally fucked up my perception of myself and stunted my social development??#because like. i was under the impression that i Discovered my Actual Identity and No Its Not A Phase!!! etc etc #and so i stuck with it for like 4 years #and sorta subconciously convinced myself 'this is who you are' and so actually maturing and getting out of high school and #discovering that i did have interest in these relationships Fucked Me Up and it took me literally another 4 years to get over it enough #to actually explore it!!#idk! sometimes these mindsets can be actually damaging!!#the idea that these labels are something intrinsic about You and are immutable and Who You Are #like. i get why these concepts exist but that isnt how this stuff works these labels are just words awkwardly taped on top of #a completely undefineable human experience that morphs and changes constantly #IDK IDK idk i just dont get why people get so caught up with labels and especially try to say 'well actually everyone else is actually #my label too like. everyone actually is like this' like you cannot fucking assume that ! oh my god!#its so weird and annoying !!#idk i really love my boyfriend this guy asked me out freshman year of college and i was like im aro #and he stuck around and was my best friend for another 4 years before i finally chilled the fuck out about the concept #of being someones boyfriend #i had convinced myself that Thats Not For Me and so Im Just Not One Of Those People #so yea seeing someone say 'actually no one wants romantic partners lol' yea it kinda pisses me off

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emloafs · 5 months ago

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and what's everyone gonna do when they find out i've got a hawkmetri to all the boys i've loved before au half written in my drafts

what would happen if i said that

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whenthegoldrays · 1 month ago

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also I think it’s time for a little Elly Lore Update because I feel like I mention so many people on here and y’all need to understand who I’m taking about when you attend the virtual sleepovers 😌

#SO. other main characters in this story:#♦️ my bestie (a.k.a. Best Friend Number One) — I’ve known her for basically ever and NO ONE annoys me like her but also we’re #too close and too important in each other’s lives to ever break up (Alexa play “Stuck With You” by Huey Lewis)#♦️ bestie number two — my Secret Keeper and probable future maid of honor. the only one of us with a boyfriend #♦️ my (honorary) little sister (a.k.a. the 13-year-old) — a girl wise beyond her years but also. yk. thirteen. I always have a blast with h #♦️ my mom and dad — self explanatory #supporting cast members:#♦️ bestie number two’s older sister — a dear friend of mine as well who is engaged to be married but is doing so in Colombia #meaning I can’t go and I’ve been inconsolable about it for weeks #♦️ bestie number two’s boyfriend — literally one of the chillest guys I know. he’s also the younger brother of her big sister’s fiancé #♦️ twinkling watermelon bestie: my other Secret Keeper and my kdrama buddy. we especially bonded over TWM #♦️ Coworker Elizabeth — the lady I work with who I used to think disliked me but now always feeds me when I’m there :)))#mmmm I think that’s it for recurring characters. then there’s the Love Interests:#♦️ The Ex Crush (a.k.a. donut boy) — my first crush who I didn’t see for years after first meeting him and then met again last year #and had dinner with his family but he didn’t really talk to me and then I saw him again earlier this week and he ignored me completely #♦️ Big Dramatic Crush — my last Big crush who I liked for two years and suffered over tremendously. he’s not really important anymore #but I do use him as a reference point often enough. there’s Before Him and there’s After Him #♦️ Three-Day Crush — what it says on the tin. a guy I liked for three days just a bit after moving on from Big Crush #and then it ended horrifically and gave me a deep fear of ever developing another crush EVER #♦️ flan boy — the boy who thawed my heart more than a year after the saga of Three-Day Crush by showing kindness and a smidge of interest #but then apparently didn’t have That kind of interest in me so I decided to move on #and lucky I did because now my bestie (who knew him first and used to ship me with him) has fallen for him herself #and yep! that’s the main cast here on whenthegoldrays.com #hope you enjoyed this lore update that no one asked for 🩷#elly's posts

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beansnpeets · 2 months ago

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I have been trying to get Echo comfortable with the crate slowly. I have been trying to prepare her for me being away from the house for work during the day eventually. Unfortunately, it's not going well at all, and I am gonna have to just start crating her when I am gone for more than an hour. I can't let her keep destroying stuff. I know she is scared of being in the crate. But this is not gonna work. I do not have the ability to keep doing this slowly. Not when she does things like this. I was only gone for less than 6 hours. And it's not like she's destroying the whole house. She also doesn't do this every time I leave. It seems arbitrary. One time, she even did it when I was gone for 10 minutes, and literally right before I had left, we had gone for a run. And it's always small, inexpensive things. But the muzzle was the last straw. That's a major inconvenience for me now.

#barkin up some trees #i feel like i cannot go anywhere #like at all #i am basically trapped at home or i have to take my dog with me #and like she is mostly fine when i leave!!!!#sometimes she just picks something small to chew up and leave by the front door #i cant spend evenings with my boyfriend at his house because of thus #*this #and i feel bad because we are ALWAYS at my house #my dogs dictate literally everything #i am going to spend christmas alone for the first time this year because i have no family and my boyfriends family is out of town #so he will be away and i will be here alone because i cant take the dogs along and i have nobody to take care of them for me #i had such an awful fucking day at work today #and this just really isnt what i needed #i cant deal with this properly when i am stressed and upset #i am mad at her rn #i am really mad at her #and she knows it #shes super sensitive to my emotions #i cannot hide it from her #its also hard to hide it when i was already so over my own threshold for the day #i feel so fucking awful today #and boyfriend made a nice supper and we watched a movie and cuddled and it was so nice and i was able to relax #but then the moment i come in the door its all ruined #if it had been something else i wouldnt have been as upset #this sucks

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katierosefun · 1 year ago

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actually as much as i love mike and harvey together. i feel so sad for rachel zane because imagine falling in love with your coworker and then you learn that your coworker is a fake lawyer but not only that, your coworker is a fake lawyer who would literally do anything for his boss. he'll literally leave you at the altar to go to prison for his boss. he'll try to quit his job multiple times but keep coming back because his boss asked him to come back. he'll move to seattle with you, and you'll breathe a sigh of relief because it means that it can finally just be the two of you, but then you learn that he's inviting his stupid former boss to join them. and his stupid former boss agrees. you smile because your husband is so stupid happy at the idea of working with his former boss again, but you've seen this film one too many times before, and you are going to be subject to watching your husband choose his stupid former boss-slash-friend over you again and again and again and again and again and ag

#caroline talks #suits #LIKE? ? ??? rachel zane babes i love u but i hope you've divorced mike ross by now <333 #like i'm so sorry girlie!!! your husband loves u i'm sure but also he's been playing stupid chicken with this guy he's been in love with #for YEARS NOW!!!!#it's also like. uh. you KNOW that harvey wouldn't do anything with mike while mike's married to rachel because of ALL THAT BAGGAGE HE HAS--#and i don't think mike would ever do anything to harvey because HE knows how much baggage harvey has #like. in my head. yeah they're all living together in seattle and rachel's just like ':/// i need to divorce this man bc we could move to #literally antarctica and mike would still find a way to drag harvey along.#and the crazy thing is that harvey would probably FOLLOW HIM.'#like. the way i'm not even exaggerating what happens in the show too?? ? ?#like we have literal scenes of rachel crying and begging mike to just LET HARVEY GO #and to just CHOOSE HER #and mike is always just like '!!! HOW DARE YOU TELL ME TO GIVE UP ON HARVEY'#and it's like. ilysm mike u crazy silly man <333 but also like. i think it's fairly reasonable of the woman you're marrying #to ask you to choose her over your boss slash buddy. y'know?#like. it's not even like rachel and mike are a cute simple girlfriend-boyfriend.#they are literally ENGAGED and they are literally supposed to START A LIFE TOGETHER--#and mike is still going ':((( i can't leave harvey behind' like actually rachel babe i am SO SORRY

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resident-rats · 5 months ago

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THERES A NEW CAT IN MY NEIGHBOURHOOD!!!!

#this is big news #when we first moved here a few years ago there were 3 cats #and I put literally all of my time and effort into befriending them #and did not introduce myself to any of the neighbours LOL #Anyway long story short turns out my partner knew two of our neighbours #and bumped into them and he was like yeah my boyfriend and I just moved into [flat number] and they both looked at each other and were like #weird cat man lives there!!#and apparently use to watch me speaking to the cats bfbfbfb #BUT ANYWAY basically the owners of those cats moved away </33 #so have had no friends (cats) for the past year </33 #UNTIL TODAY #I tried to pspsps it over but it ran away </33 #but I think I can befriend it #at least now people know me and don’t think I’m some weirdo stealing cats #if I put half as much effort into befriending people as I do cats it would probably resolve a lot of issues lol #personal #ALSO those neighbours have offered for me to come up to their flat and pet their two cats but I’m too awkward to #take them up on their invite lol

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solace-seekers · 8 months ago

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screaming into the void <3

#my best friends boyfriend (who i’ve also been friends with for years) is just. not himself rn #we think it’s a manic episode but we don’t really know but it’s. terrifying lowkey #he thinks he’s genuinely jesus and that he’s conquered time and that he and my bsf are adam and eve #he’s been sending my bsf liek hundreds of texts per day since tuesday but it got really really bad and incoherent yesterday #and i woke up this morning to see multiple texts from gcs he created w me in them #and he keeps being like ‘because it’s 6:20 this is true’ and like ‘i know that at 9 pm everyone is gonna understand’#and he’ll text like 5 times then send a sc of what he just texted like that proves something but it’s all nonsense #i’m just really really concerned cause he really needs help but i don’t know how to ensure that happens cause he’s 19. not a minor #he’s just. not him rn. he’s called my bsf multiple times yesterday when he HATES calling normally #he had his band and his mom over in his apartment yesterday cause my bsf called his mom and h went to his bands show but was visibly not ok #and he saw nothing weird about it even tho he hates having ppl over normally and never without warning #and you can’t get him to see logic because everything you say he just twists around to work for him #to be clear it was not this bad when it started. when it started it seemed like normally maybe slightly out there conclusions he was drawing #but it just got worse and worse like exponential decay and really bad yesterday #he also didn’t sleep at all yesterday night and idk if he slept tonight #i know his mom took his phone at one point but he texted me and gcs w me in it starting at like 6:20 this morning #and my bsf and i and friends are on a trip out of state rn but we’re leaving today and i don’t wanna wake her up until i have to because #this is literally hell for her. but it’s just. scary. i don’t know what to do. i don’t think there’s any good options really for me rn #i want to warn ppl and try to explain he’s Not Him rn so they don’t get concerned but who knows if they’ll understand what i’m trying to say #i know it’s not the end of the world but it really feels like the end of my world as i know it if that makes sense #and my bsf lives with him in an apartment near their college and they just signed the lease for the next year #but she can’t stay there with him alone. not until he gets help. we’re all too scared it’s going in the directon where he thinks it’s better #for ppl to go to the afterlife. which like he never would normally. but he’s Not Him and so like. who knows #he keeps talking about all these different dimensions and how you need to travel to the 7th dimension to understand #my bsf was crying yesterday and she called her mom to explain and she keeps saying that she just wants her jake back it’s really scary #cause he will probably never be the same again. he’ll be similar but different but she wants his comfort but he’s Not Him. and can’t give it #i just. really want this to get better but it’s so hard to see that happening rn

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valencock · 2 years ago

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Ya know fellas, if ur man thinks family guy clips are funny u might wanna check his phone

#another exciting installment of 'AJ letting men into his life and getting cheated on'#my boyfriend of over two years had been cheating on me for OVER HALF our relationship wowie!!! we love it!!!#mans was using DISCORD to chat and send pics FROM OUR BED to randoms on the internet #last guy that cheated on me fuxking loved family guy #i have always hated the show and now itll be my biggest 🚩🚩🚩#i cant stop being cheated on and i cant even begin to describe how deep in the shitter my mental state is #im still with him were trying to “”“”work“”“” on things #its hard when u love someone for so long and they hurt you in ways that you dont even have words for #im sorry i use notes as my diary i have literally no friends since i moved and i cant even talk to my boyfriend about anything anymore

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non-un-topo · 1 year ago

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Talking to my sister can be one of the most aggravating experiences

#just allowing myself a few moments of self-pity today #because i'm a little overstimulated/sick of people talking AT me #i have begun to notice that i'm never asked anything... not a single thing. no questions about my life or interests or how school is going #no questions about my partner or our anniversary and no acknowledgement of the big haircut i just got #no questions about my BIL's wedding. none about my health.#every day it's just people talking AT me. kind of tired at the moment...#and this is made worse by my sister's holier-than-thou attitude about literally the smallest and most insignificant things #like washing clothes? and cooking rice?? idk she talks like a housewife now.#and i get to listen to her complain about her 35 year old boyfriend and not say ONE kind thing for 2 hours straight #not a single question for me. not a single nice thing. and i'm talked over constantly #it's not like i don't raise my voice or speak my mind lol #it's just that. between my family and my partner's family. it feels like no one knows just how smart i am and how much fun i can be.#my partner is perfect in so many ways. my best friend and the kindest and most compassionate person i know.#but i really could brag and boast like my sister does over absolutely nothing. because i have actual achievements. but i don't #because who does that lol. fucking annoying and rude people.#maybe my family just thinks i'm okay and so they never ask me anything or call me. ever.#but see.... i don't talk to them because i want advice or help or money. i talk to them because they're my family #and i would very much like to feel cherished and loved by them #/ end angst and self-pity boo hoo

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djarinova · 3 months ago

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trying to act normal over the fact that we're moving house next week. and failing

#god i just need to fall apart NOW #im barely hanging on fr #we dismantled the sofa today and are now sitting on our old chairs in the living room #and i almost died actually #thinking about how i had no idea that last night would be THE last night i ever ate my dinner on that sofa in this house #or about how last night was the last night I would ever sit with my boyfriend on that sofa in this house #or or or or or #there are so many things that are about to be the last time i ever do them in this house #and i hate that i cant properly know when they will be #what if i never walk my dogs in this park again #what if i never wash my hair upstairs ever again #what if i never cook another meal in this kitchen #WHY CAN WE NOT KNOW WHEN WE ARE DOING THINGS FOR THE FINAL TIME #i hate this #it's literally never going to be over and i mean that #after we move #we have to clean and organise and unpack/buy things for my dads house #which will take months especially to buy furniture and decorate bec he wont have enough money for extra things #and then my mum will be moving into her new house #probably December but honestly could be after Christmas. who knows #and then the same again #at least her house is newer and has been lived in #dads hasnt been lived in for years and is dirty and unused #FUCK #i need a break #and i just know i wont be able to visit my boyfriends house for WEEKS #i just want to get through this move but god. it will never be over #em talks #tag talk

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britneyshakespeare · 3 months ago

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you know i don't bring this up as a light anecdote because it involves me being talked about in really perverted ways behind my back. but when i was like 20 i was part of this large group of friends that was mostly a bunch of guys, and a couple of girlfriends. and the energy if you were a girl starting to hang around them was like. "ok, so who are you gonna hook up with/date?" and it didn't last long bc of course when the answer ended up being "well none of you," the patience they had for me evaporated. lol. so i was being talked about among literally every single one of them behind my back in a gigantic group chat, of like literally everyone in the original group chat (including the ppl who never fucking used it, and it was over twelve people) minus a few other ppl they didn't like, decidedly. and eventually one of my GOOD friends (that i am still friends w to this day) told me about it and then there was the whole drama of people not being able to accept consequences for their actions, not owning up to being cowardly bullies, etc... yawn yawn yawn. truly that was some stupid middle school shit from a bunch of immature ppl that i didn't really take to heart. not the guys, anyway. i was honestly very hurt by a couple of girls who partook in it though, that i thought genuinely liked me and who i genuinely liked in return, so that was shocking to me.

but anyway. after this all happened my sister went OFF on this one guy in particular. bc he had been a nuisance before. he was a slimy creep honestly. i used to feel a lot of pity for him bc i thought he was just sad and wanted attention but that was just my 20-year-old nonsense brain way of interpreting it. he was incredibly annoying and would wear girls down, would hop from one girl to another week after week, each one not reciprocating his constant desperate flirting and lovebombing. and there was a joke he participated in about me and my (also queer, female) friend that was particularly crossing a line. so kaily just ripped this guy a new one when he went to try and offer an explanation. like imagine trying to even talk to someone after you just humiliated and bullied their sister... couldn't be me. like i was literally the one being bullied in this instant but i can't imagine the kind of white hot rage i'd be in if someone did that to my sister. you know? so yeah.

at the end of this rant kaily told him "go to hell." you know. like fuck off. go fuck yourself. go to hell. good old indecent words to throw out at someone you loathe, right? i'm literally ONLY bringing this up because i cannot stop thinking, all these years later, about how one of the girls who participated in it, and was the least apologetic about it (in fact weirdly a year later she came back just to taunt me again and tell me how much better her life is without me and how stupid i was for breaking up a 'wonderful' friend group?? yeah that sounds like the behavior of someone who is over it)... i don't remember where but someone told me she talked particularly about that message to that guy and said "kaily told (name) to burn in hell" like. like that whole time she interpreted my sister as like a conservative christian who was calling him a dirty sinner. bc presumably she had never heard the phrase "go to hell" in a non-literal context before, or just never understood it?? like that girl didn't necessarily strike me as incredibly bright or something, in the short time i knew her, but i never would've guessed she could be so dumb...

but for the record that pervert guy yeah he is gonna burn in hell.

#tales from diana #im sorry how much dramatic backstory that anecdote required #that one girl and her friend are still some of the most baffling pieces of that story to me #like i hate to say it but i was not shocked that all but like two of those guys really liked or respected me at all #none of them seemed to like any of the other girls in the friend group #they just barely seemed to tolerate their friends' girlfriends. bc they had to #and some of those guys didn't even seem to like or respect their girlfriends #both of those girls who bullied me were some of 'the girlfriends' and i have to be honest. i wouldnt wanna be 'the girlfriend' there #neither of them are still w their then-boyfriends and im pretty sure for both of them it ended awfully #idk what happened to the really particularly aggressive one who thought kaily said 'burn in hell'#but for some reason like 6 months later when she and her bf broke up she unfriended me on fb #i had never unfriended her in case she wanted to apologize at any point (i had hope... 20 year old nonsense again i was really naive)#but then yeah another 6 months later she and the other girlfriend (still in a relationship at that time) just blew up at me and some others #for like no reason. just bc we all stayed friends... w each other #like i promise u i never went out of my way to bother these girls in any way. directly or indirectly. they just had to say #'its been a year and i still hate you guys' like why. we were literally all adults. we didnt go to school together we never saw each other #we were all just frankly moving on but i guess they were not over it #the other girl whose relationship lasted longer had maybe the worse boyfriend? definitely the worse breakup #he abandoned her for another woman and kicked her out of their living space #she was literally begging on social media for help #and again that guy was a monster who did not seem to really love her. he's married to the other woman now #they have a kid together #idk where either of those girls are now bc basically all their friends abandoned them #feels like if they had chosen their allies better way back when we were 20-21 itd have been different #which is not to blame them. but like. i would not have let that happen to my friends #but the fact that anyone stood up for me when i was being bullied was 'starting drama'#and the fact that they all let their problems pile up until their lives are destroyed? well i guess thats just being civilized and mature #sorry if this is just sounding incredibly judgmental bc i dont think they deserve their situations at all #but i dont think their choices didnt play some role in their being eventually discarded by rotten fuckin men #they were pretty rotten to me too. poor things...

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butchlifeguard · 4 months ago

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i mean i think we have to break up before christmas or so which is gonna be really embarrassing but its gonna avert the mutual emotional devastation that would be happening in early may

#its my fucking junior year. my parents cant know she even exists #this creates the conditions of me maintaining a secret relationship #with 4 ap tests. hosa comp if im lucky. spelling comp because theres no other option for me.#my recert and orientation for lifeguarding. figuring out fucking PROM. all my other bullshit finals #state vase also if im lucky. and organizing end of year events for multiple clubs #being kind of bitchy to anyone whos clingy to me would be the BEST option.#worst ill be indirectly violent or say some dumb shit and block yr number then have too much pride to unblock it #like ok. we deserve each other but she deserves someone who can commit to her more #(now that im saying that it would be the best rationale i can give tbh)#i dont wanna break up bc i like being with her but i have to schedule everything w my already wack fucking schedule #i can never have her over or tell my parents im going out w her and barely any of my friends know her #and honestly i dont want to break up bc it would make me sad and lonely #but i dont want to like. wait until i find a better girl because holy fuck thats insane #better meaning literally just easier. cis boyfriend that my parents like or cis Gal Pal that i can hang out with all the time #because the sneaking around shit is so much of my emotional bandwidth

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xx-psych0-rabbit-xx · 11 months ago

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sorry vent in the tags bc i think im going insane over this one?

#ok so my mom n her boyfriend literally fifht every other day n i think she finally realized after 8 years i have ears? n i can hear them?#so she hit me w fucking.'dont get upset its just like i used to fight with your *slur* aunt all the time when you were little!' YOURE MAKMG #ME MORE UPSET YOU THINK I LIKED HEARING THAT??? IS YOUR VICTIM COMPLEX SO LARGE YOURE CONVINCED #YOUR ELEMENTARY SCHOOL AGED CHILD WAS AN ENTHUSIAST FOR YOU FIGHTING W HER OVER A PAN??#GIRL NOT EVEN ADULTS LIKE BEING AROUND LOUD FIGHTING 24/7 YOU THINK I LIKED THAT WHEN I DIDNT #EVEN KNOW HOW TO WRITE MY FULL NAME?? I HOPE YOUR SICKNESS GETS WORSE GO TO HELL #analiceoriginal.txt #also bc of their fight she burnt the cake topping so the leftovers didnt taste nice at all.why cant alice have nice things.

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laconchadetumadre · 6 months ago

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benjulie's relationship from julie's pov me thinks