#like. identifying as aroace in highschool [starting at 14] and then continuing for years | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

bucephaly · 23 days ago

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Amazing take on the dash tonight. 'I think most people actually don't want or value or need romantic affection or attachment and that most people are aro' uhhhhhhhhhhhh????

Also like. I'm p sure what constitutes the difference between romantic and platonic and sexual affection and attraction is purely cultural and different to everyone. I wish people would stop focusing so hard on the idea that these labels are like actual objectively true things about people. Like, would some people probably be happier without feeling forced to pursue relationships by society? Sure. But saying that most people are Actually Aromantic and that 'very few' people actually want or value romantic attachment ???? I'm honestly kinda tired of these like 'most people are Actually bi lol' 'most people are at least a Little ace!!' Etc etc type takes. 'No one is Actually cis' like can you shut upppppp these words are just WORDS for extremely abstract cultural concepts that mean different things to everyone yall do not need to take them this seriously. And im just so tired of people being like 'man knowing about this identity helped me, im sure Everyone feels like this and Everyone actually secretly hates this common thing' like uhhhh no. They don't. Lol.

#like. identifying as aroace in highschool [starting at 14] and then continuing for years #actually royally fucked up my perception of myself and stunted my social development??#because like. i was under the impression that i Discovered my Actual Identity and No Its Not A Phase!!! etc etc #and so i stuck with it for like 4 years #and sorta subconciously convinced myself 'this is who you are' and so actually maturing and getting out of high school and #discovering that i did have interest in these relationships Fucked Me Up and it took me literally another 4 years to get over it enough #to actually explore it!!#idk! sometimes these mindsets can be actually damaging!!#the idea that these labels are something intrinsic about You and are immutable and Who You Are #like. i get why these concepts exist but that isnt how this stuff works these labels are just words awkwardly taped on top of #a completely undefineable human experience that morphs and changes constantly #IDK IDK idk i just dont get why people get so caught up with labels and especially try to say 'well actually everyone else is actually #my label too like. everyone actually is like this' like you cannot fucking assume that ! oh my god!#its so weird and annoying !!#idk i really love my boyfriend this guy asked me out freshman year of college and i was like im aro #and he stuck around and was my best friend for another 4 years before i finally chilled the fuck out about the concept #of being someones boyfriend #i had convinced myself that Thats Not For Me and so Im Just Not One Of Those People #so yea seeing someone say 'actually no one wants romantic partners lol' yea it kinda pisses me off

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