#literally hes just coping with his trauma

[evellynssocbrainrot]

I'm not targeting anyone here, but I saw a shitty take on Kanej on Reddit. And I just want to say:

Please, please, please do not compare Kaz and Inej's trauma with each other. Don't compare any of the Crows' trauma with each other. Never do that. It's unfair and harmful. Trauma is terrible, it doesn't matter how it's obtained or how much of it there is, or how long it will take to heal from. Trauma is trauma. And it always hurts to live with it.

Kaz was conned out of everything, lost his brother in the most brutal way, and suffered an extremely traumatic event that wounded him to such a degree that he was unable to touch. His coping mechanisms are awful, and he is completely isolated from everyone and it destroys him. It hurts him to no end. It isn't his fault because he was only a child, he had nobody to guide him.

Inej was captured, thrown on a ship, and taken to Ketterdam where she was forced to sign a letter she couldn't even read and then ended up becoming a sex slave. She was raped and tortured repeatedly over the spam of a year and resorted to literally detaching her mind from her body as a coping mechanism. She had no concern over her own body and the abuse it was suffering, the indirect abuse that Inej herself was inflicting on it by separating herself from it. It wasn't her fault, she was conditioned to. She had no other means of escape.

Jesper lost his mother and then was told by his own father to ignore and hide something that is supposed to be a part of him. Ignoring it was what hurt him and lead him down a destructive path that involved addiction and so much self-hate and disappointment that I'M in pain every time I think about it 😭

Nina and Matthias were both made to work in the army. Nina was conscripted away from her parents when she was a baby, and Matthias lost his entire family to war. They were thrown in their respective militaries and then were raised with prejudice. Both of them were nearly killed several times.

And Wylan had to hear his own father tell him that he was worthless for something he was unable to do, and despite having so many other talents. His own father attempted to send him to his death. He may not have faced so much physical abuse, but psychological abuse is just as worse, I know from experience.

All the Crows suffered immensely. They all had to go through something they never deserved. And it rendered them helpless. I'm not joking at all when I say that they were literally hanging on for dear life every other page. They were desperate for something to help themselves, and were willing to do anything to get it, even if it was wrong. They had barely any resources to work with as well. They all could have died. Again and again. Comparing their trauma is, like I said, harmful, and it diminishes the whole story.

[scoobydoodean]

Hello<3

I was wondering if you had any thoughts on how fandom misconstrues Dean's relationship with alcohol?

There is so much emphasis on making him out to be a violent mean drunk, but I mostly remember that he drinks and like passes out when he's grieving or stressed (iirc) (s6 PTSD, Soulless sam, when Cas dies, etc.)? It's weird to me because Dean isn't the only character to go through this. Bobby relies on drinking too. He's exactly as gruff as Dean can be. He also had an abusive father. Yet I don't usually see people judging Bobby for that (if they exist, I haven't seen them at least thank God).

I get frustrated when people say things like the MoC was a direct metaphor for alcoholism just because it made Dean sooo violent and angry, etc. And, it's like an unrealistic understanding of alcoholism irl and also of Dean himself and his actual actions and context. I just get weirdly defensive of him over it lol.

If you've already hashed this out I'm sry! At the end of the day, it's all just interpretation ig, but I wanted to know your take on it cause ik you'd look at dean with a good faith lens.

<3

One could say I have had thoughts on how fandom misconstrues Dean's relationship with alcohol. One could even say I have spawned extremely funny multi-day fandom-wide disk horses on this subject simply by giving my opinion on my own blog when an anon asked me to.

I'm tracking Dean's relationship with alcohol (and other substances bc I was too lazy to make two separate tags) through #dean and drugs during my rewatch if you care to peruse, but I think you and I are of a similar mind on this.

Prior to season 4, Dean has a very average relationship with alcohol. In season 4, Dean starts using alcohol as a coping tool to help him fall asleep because he's having nightmares about hell. By season 6, alcohol is also a coping tool for depression and stress. He drinks to deal with nightmares, he drinks to cope with hell trauma, he drinks after soulless Sam watches his sexual assault with a smile, he drinks after Cas swallows all the souls and Death blames Dean for everything, he drinks throughout season 7 to cope with Cas's death and Bobby's death. I'm up to 8.01 and have yet to see a single occasion where Dean drinking and Dean being violent co-occurred. What I do see is Dean drinking when he is sad, alone, or scared.

I'll continue tracking—I'll eventually get back into the MoC arc where Dean is drinking heavily again, and obviously Dean + drinking + anger + violence are all going to happen at the same time in MoC seasons. However, correlation does not equal causation, and while someone can choose to believe that Dean's drinking causes him to be angry, I think the literal answer in season 9/10 is that Dean's been cursed by the father of murder, and on a more metaphorical level, the Mark of Cain quite overtly represents Dean's resentment toward Sam which Carver spends his entire run laying out in great detail. This is why the whole Carver run culminates in Amara (a Dean parallel) being unleashed to take revenge on her brother, and why the MoC is a brother murderer curse to begin with. Alcohol is set dressing. It shows us—just as it did in the past—that Dean feels sad, alone, and scared (in this case, of what the MoC could lead him to do—which also isn't dissimilar from the original reason Dean started drinking—after hell to cope with the trauma of not just being tortured but torturing others—the fear that he'd been made into a monster).

Looking at the matter holistically, I don't personally see Dean as an angry drunk. I see him as a sad drunk. If anything, I think he hopes that alcohol will drown his anger and violent urges in the MoC arc, or at least slow him down, while also being the traditional tool he uses during boughts of depression (which he is very much experiencing during the MoC arc to the point of suicide). I also think outside the outlier of season 9/10, the narrative supports sad drunk Dean far better than angry drunk Dean.

[persoj]

People who talk about the nerdy prudes not mourning Richie and Ruth annoy me sm. Like yes, their friends died, but also - they were going through an EXTREMELY traumatic time. They'd just MURDERED someone for God's sake. They can't process trauma properly. Yes, it's not healthy, but it's more than likely that they were all suppressing it because they physically didn't have time to process it. They had to worry about Max, about Grace, about the fact that their friends were being murdered- they couldn't mourn because they had to constantly be vigilant and worry about 'am I next, am I next, am I next' and whether they were going to get arrested or not. People fail to realise that they were literally on the run. And they were seeing shit that was barely within their comprehension - Steph, Pete and Grace all met FIVE GODS! And if Ted's religious (Presbyterian or whatever he says) then it's likely Pete is too, so it's entirely justified to think that Pete and Grace have both just had their entire sense of faith crushed before their eyes. And if Tinky already had Ted in the Bastard's Box, then Pete's also just been forced to see his (missing/assumed dead) brother. Steph's just found out that her dad is involved with five Gods who created Hatchetfield and who want her to KILL the guy she loves - there are lots of big emotions happening and NONE of them are going to be able to process their grief or ANYTHING properly because their lives are actively falling apart around them. I personally think the reason Grace goes over to the LiB so easily is because she needs something to put her faith in again. She can't cope without the concept of God ("DO SOMETHING YOU SON OF A BITCH" - A line I will never understand why people laugh at) and she needs to find something to fall back on.

I just. Idk. Grief is a big thing and trauma is a big thing and trauma and grief are a terrible mix that means you process neither thing properly.

People also aren't tapping into the ability to make a hurt/comfort fic with all this. Like - imagine Grace, Pete and Steph just having a sleepover and talking about all of it. Getting out all their big emotions. Supporting each other. It'd be so nice 🥺.

But yeah. Don't get me started on people using it as justification to go 'LOOK THEY WEREN'T FRIENDS BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T MOURN'. They couldn't!!

[raven0usravi0lii]

hello! i'm apart of a DID system and i saw the post about liu's DID, and i thought i'd throw some of my own two cents into the pot (one of my special interests is also psychology, specifically dissociative disorders + trauma disorders) i do apologize now though because i don't know all of the liu lore, and i'm not entirely sure which jtk lore we'd be considering for this (also not entirely sure which one is older in your headcanons).

i definitely agree with the system you reblogged previously, but i do also want to make note of something else. the headcanon some people have that sully is a demon would be an incredibly interesting thing to touch on with the DID. it very well could be that sully is a demonic-based alter, but instead of being 'ooo spooky demon' it's more of a.. thing born to comfort liu? imagine if you will, neglectful + abusive parents for liu and jeff, and liu is repeatedly dubbed a bad child. sully takes on a demonic form in their mind to help liu section off the trauma, effectively cementing sully as the bad child Instead of liu. but when they're older, sully being the Bad Child no longer particularly helps liu. sully would just be doing what he has always done to help- he'd be taking the place of liu, doing the bad things. but these bad things are no longer just what their parents tried to pinpoint as evil (which was a bunch of lies), this is now Actual Manslaughter. at the end of the day though, sully Isn't an 'evil alter.' he's just a little kid trying to protect the kid that made him, the kid that was so so scared and alone who thought that the only way he could survive his childhood was by becoming someone else, someone more inhuman, someone willing to take the hurt and turn it into fuel for the fire.

i also say this mainly because i am also psychotic, but trauma tends to allow for psychosis to form more easily in people. if liu attached to religion as a coping mechanism, and gained a delusion that sully was Possessing him, it'd give a good foundation for angst; especially when sully is a Kid. all he'd ever done was try to help liu, and now liu is calling him a monster and telling him to get out of his head.

additionally, if you wanted to explore the idea of liu and jeff eventually reconnecting: while liu may eventually reach some kind of understanding for jeff's actions (i mean, jeff Was having an entire breakdown and there was literally no support for him. maybe he was trying to 'save' liu. i don't know) sully would be MUCH harder to reason with. sully is a little kid who's just trying his best. jeff Hurt them. sully was most likely triggered out almost immediately whenever they became conscious again after the Incident. sully still feels it all Raw. it still feels like yesterday for him. his hands will shake around jeff out of fear and anger, they always will; he trusted him, how could he do this?

(i do apologize if this is incoherent- my psychosis has been causing a few issues with organizing thoughts but i got excited when i saw the post on my dash and wanted to talk about it)

OH I ROCK WITH THIS. I ROCK WITH THIS SO HARD.

[basu-shokikita]

Skwisgaar putting distance between him and other people because he feels far too superior to everyone to become friends with them yet also getting depressed when he sees others have fun together because he feels excluded, despite him putting the distance in the first place. Skwisgaar not wanting to be hurt by other people yet using the justification that they're not worthy of his time when really he's just scared of being vulnerable. Nobody can hurt you if you never open up to them. Nobody can forget about you and neglect you when you never become dependent to them in the first place

[ricky-mortis]

Curtwen Week Day 6: Happy Ending

[seeminglyseph]

it's so funny to me... looking at video reactions and content about the anime of Erased and realize how many people felt like... idk. cuckolded? by the fact that Kayo did not end up with Satoru in the end, but with Hiromi, the boy who also would have died if the timeline had not been reset.

and like. some of my amusement comes from like... my own ignorance in not realizing that would be a reaction. because like. Obviously. We've been in Satoru's shoes this entire journey and it felt like, especially in the anime, Kayo and Satoru were having these big meaningful moments. like. how could that not be a romance? even though Satoru repeatedly is like 'I am 30, I'm not catching feelings in this situation, what am I doing?'

which I took as like. "Oh, he's inhabiting his little 8 year-old body and also has not had social connection in a long time and is just... having emotions. and Satoru's story is about learning to care and feel again. because adult Satoru had shut down so much due to the trauma of both losing so much in his youth and having the adults around him cope by basically refusing to deal with it and shutting it down. Returning to his childhood before the trauma is reawakening his ability to connect, trust and feel again. Which is something adult Satoru is as confused and unfamiliar with as child Satoru would be with a crush so it reads very similar."

but I also like. ran out of episodes at episode 9, then read the manga, then got like... really really invested in what the story had to say about trauma and the cycles of abuse and silence and well meaning cruelty and convenient victims and patterns of violence and community scapegoats and justice and how people act to preserve face and the justice system and like... the anime picked one thing in the manga to focus on and it was Kayo. and it did that thing like... really really masterfully. it made Kayo's story so heartrending that people forgot almost entirely about everything else. but like. the manga is about like... multiple other subjects of which Kayo features predominantly but like. The character that Satoru is freaking out about having been killed in his flashbacks in the manga is Hiromi, because Hiromi was his friend. It doesn't change the fact that Kayo is very impactful, but the story doesn't revolve entirely around her. So the fact that Hiromi and Kayo found love instead of death, but many anime viewers seem to forget entirely that Hiromi is also a would-be murder victim, is because so much of the non-Kayo story is just... not present or altered.

And even stuff with Kayo because like. She came back after being taken to her grandmother and helped them with the investigation and protection of Aya, the other potential murder victim that goes to a different school.

Honestly sometimes I feel like even people who talk about the anime ending being bad vs the manga ending, miss the parts of the manga that the anime changes. The anime is very excellent for what it is as a stand alone piece, however since it had adapted so much out of the manga to make itself a stand alone piece it didn't give itself an ending that matched what it had created. The anime had devoted itself entirely to the Kayo aspects of the story because they evoked such strong emotions, but the ending... isn't about Kayo. because in the manga, the story wasn't about Kayo. the thing that seems kind of funny to me is, they were stuck with 2 episodes to wrap up a fat chunk of the manga. They were always gonna have to do an anime original ending. They *could* have just gone balls to the wall and gone completely original and played into the fact that they'd been focusing on Kayo the whole time. Not necessarily "waits for him the whole time" but something that puts more focus on her to give more emotional catharsis to the audience. Instead it went with the option no one was happy with and did a limp noodle fast adaptation of the last chunk of the manga with no character development or deduction or planting from the rest of the anime because half the scenes that made any of it make sense got cut.

And now everyone remembers Erased as that great anime with a terrible ending. which sucks because the manga honestly really has a lot to say about a lot of topics. And the anime is artistic and beautiful as hell. but like. the fact that so much of the message is fully not like... either adapted or perceived by audiences or like. Ignored. feels like a sign of something kind of frustrating...

Or I am overthinking big time. That's. I guess a possibility. It might not be that deep, but I think it is. there just might be a level of clumsiness in its execution sometimes, but I think the themes and messages are still there...

[the--firevenus]

Gotham sentient au would fuck so hard if people focus more on the god & worshipper / believer aspect of it between Bruce and Gotham.

Bruce who is not superstitious nor particularly religious (even tho he is culturally / ethnically Jewish), but by God he will be a liar if he said the way he's devoted with Gotham isn't inheritly how one would worship a god.

Like an old god that is dying, her city reflect her stage, no one believe in her anymore, she's been ostracized by the world and she's (Gotham) now only filled with spite, sorrow and rage..but one person, whomst decide to be knight, to be her protector, to be the lighthouse to her people so they can live another day. So she can breathe better.

I felt like Gotham would be more than just a "mother", she is everything and nothing, an eldritch being is the closest thing people can comprehend her to be, but she's neither that nor a spirit. She's in the wind that howling the meadows, she's in the shadow that lurk beside her knight, she is the watchful murders of crow that looked over everything, she is the water, she is the street, she is the blood that spilled and the new life that's born. She's an old god, she's a folklore, she's just a myth that is dying but refuse to die.

[yellowocaballero]

in love with both the roleswap ficlet you have as well as Utopia. im curious, what are your thoughts/hopes with rin? i feel like she always gets the short end of the stick when it comes to fics and id love to hear anything about her from you

I do have a soft spot for characters who haunt the narrative - who create an empty space so tangible that the void is its own character. When Obito and Kakashi stood in the same room in Utopia, I always considered the imprint she left on them as a third character. Not Rin herself - just how she damaged them. I think it's heartwarmingly toxic yaoi how Kakashi stole Obito's personality, so I decided that Kakashi actually stole the erotic novels from Rin. She was a superfan of bodice ripper steamy romance novels, as it turns out.

You have to make up your own personality for Rin. So I made decisions as an author about writing her for the roleswap. I wanted her to be the Naruto figure - the leader, the glue who held everybody together, the one who was very smart about people. She was just as stubborn and fiercely smart as the boys, but because her genius was in noncombat arts it was overlooked. The idealist and optimist, who hoped so genuinely for a better world. One where she could protect the people she loved. I think Rin loved far, far too much. She and the boys were thrown into insanely traumatic situations far too young, and as a result I think they developed a codependent trauma bond that resulted in over-emotional reliance and falling in desperate teenage love with each other.

As we all know, in Naruto these traits are the recipe for either the greatest hero or the most insane supervillain in the series. The most dangerous person in Naruto is the person who loves too much, who believes in a better world where peace and love and happiness can reign, and who has the power to make it a reality. The person who's lost everything, and as such has nothing to lose.

I don't think one little sword and seal can kill a jinchuuriki.

Yeah, Rin plays a major role in the AU lmfao. Personally, I support women's wrongs. As does Kakashi. #feminisminnaruto

[no1ryomafan]

Due to circumstances irl me and my friends still won’t be able to finish new getter watch which fuck knows when it’ll be resume now and one of the factors wasn’t even because not everyone could come-like one person was sick but that was it-but because we had a bunch of irl shit happened and I’m just reminded the part of the show we landed on is super fucking angsty and doesn’t get any better and that has probably encapsulated so of my iffy feelings with new despite it being arguably the most best written ova- but I don’t know if I wanna get into a whole rant about it in a post because some people might think I’m reaching even though I’m safer here compared to twit so might keep vague thoughts in the tags below.

[jackdup]

/ᐠ｡ꞈ｡ᐟ\ . . . pokes head around corner like the most uncertain and nervous cat you've ever seen— bienvenue !! (。･∀･)ﾉ

just wanted to pop in quick and thank the folks who have decided to follow back (you all know me from my other disaster blogs, so bless you for willingly following this one, too . . . you're the MVPs)

i'm still kinda dippin' my toes in and gradually getting interactions going while i recover from casi's absence after her visit [blows her a quick kiss (ﾉ∀`♥)], so thanks for your patience in the meantime!

excited to get to write someone else who's been personally victimized by h/andsome ja/ck (me 🤝 timmy), and i look forward to exploring things with you talented folks! (´◡`)

[geddy-leesbian]

you know I thought I was being nice and sparing Leon Some trauma in this AU by him not having shitty parents like usual, just dead parents

should have known it couldn't last. accidentally stumbled into a subplot of Luis reminiscing about his grandfather and Leon being like "wait" and realizing oh yeah his parents kinda sucked damn

[onnahu]

Shen Qingqiu is so funny bc what do you mean all the other mxtx protagonist confront their trauma, beat the big bad and find their peace with the loved ones knowing the dead are at peace, while sqq just refuses to think about anything that makes him slightly emotionally vunereable, instead coping with a terrible humor?

Like, literally the first book, he kills the skinner demon. There is like, one sentence that goes 'oh shit i killed someone, but that's just a book character, but also i killed someone, actually whatever i'll just not think about it' and proceeds to shove the whole ordeal into a neat small box at the back of his mind to be never opened again.

The family he left behind? What family. What life? I don't know what you're on, so imma just make a dick joke and not think about it ever again.

[gremlingottoosilly]

konig falls in love with his therapist and kidnaps her because he thought her compassion was her showing interest in him

how instead of breathing exorcises as a coping strategy he’s using therapist!reader as a fleshlight for a coping mechanism

You dared to say he has a problem with showing affection and committing to people in non-violent ways. He can be good at showing affection! Great, even! And he will show it to you once he is settled with the basement where he is going to keep you for the rest of your life. At least now you will have time for therapy sessions when he needs it - because you're literally going to be at his beck and call. And on his cock, too. You whimper something about him still having a chance at redemption if he just lets you go, that his coping mechanisms in the form of kidnapping people he cares about are not healthy and won't help him in the long run - but he doesn't fucking care, not when he can pepper kisses across your face and make you warm his cock with your pussy like any good specialist should. Fuck the boundaries and morality - Konig is convinced he can heal his social anxiety by banging his cute therapist. Surely, this is going to make him so much better as a human being. He is very good at breathing, exercises, and counting to ten when it involves plunging his cock deep into your warm pussy and making you milk him for all his worth. He is even better at listening to you when your words are muffled from his cock entering your mouth. If you really want to help him become a functional human being, you will have to adapt - and you will have to let him nuzzle in your chest and listen to his rambling about how much he fucking hated his parents and his old classmates. This man is a bundle of psychological curiosity, and you sort off feel like an explorer, trying to understand whatever the fuck is wrong with him. It's almost impossible to know, honestly - but you're trying to unwrap the layers of trauma settled in this man's head. While giving him head, yes. Konig keeps his pretty therapist chained to his bed and only ever lets you roam around when you're indulging in his mommy issues and domestic fantasies, creating a stable home environment that he never had as a kid. Playing his wife and a little bit of a caretaker, making sure he eats 3 meals per day, all of his snacks, and gets to fuck your pussy while you stroke his head and ask him how many people he killed on his last mission. It is fucked up - but it's a civil service in keeping this man in check.

[faramirsonofgondor]

AU where Mary and John Grayson come back to life (through magic or some other weird thing idk) and come to the wrong conclusions about the Batfam. Like as soon as they come back they’re transported into the manor where Alfred is just like “Oh dear!” and then walks in Dick, dressed as Batman, with Damian, in full Robin gear (this is when everybody thought Bruce was dead). And Dick’s parents recognize him immediately, and they just kind of roll with it cuz what the hell. And then they turn their attention to Damian (who they heard Dick call “Robin” and who is dressed in their family colors) and they’re just like “aww, a grandson”. And Dick is too in shock to correct them and so he has to roll with it. And then over time Mary and John meet more of the fam and their alter egos but they think that they’re all just apart of the circus and not crime fighting vigilantes because circus performers would be the most obvious conclusion. They’re also under the impression that Dick just built this family himself because it’s not like Bruce is around and Dick always wanted siblings, didn’t he? And like none of the Batfam has the heart to correct them on anything because while Dick can be annoying sometimes, none of them want to mess this up for him. Plus, it was nice to have some adults who had healthy coping mechanisms and stuff. Eventually it becomes harder and harder to keep the charade and they start to bet on who will get caught first.

John: You know you carry an awful lot of guns for someone in the circus. What did you say you do?

Jason, sweating: …..Security

John, who literally died at the circus: Oh, that’s nice. Wish we had that back in the day.

Mary: You know, it’s been a few months of us being back, and I’d love to see you all perform sometime.

Tim, running on two hours of sleep: Uh… you can’t because…… our shows are all sold out!

Mary: Oh, well that’s lovely dear. It’s a shame we can’t go, though.

Eventually, though, the rest of the Batfam start to relax and get closer to Mary & John. Then, funnily enough, it’s Dick “Trauma Is My Middle Name” Grayson who accidentally lets the truth slip during one of his sleep deprived hallucination sessions, in which he believes that Mary and John are also hallucinations and starts ranting about being Batman and such. Mary and John were already able to tell that Dick had been hiding something and that he had trauma because they’re not blind, but they didn’t expect this. But whatever reaction the Batfam was expecting, it wasn’t Mary and John’s slightly disappointed frowns as they exclaimed “So you don’t work for the circus? 🙁” because they had been really looking forward to catching a show eventually.

Bonus: Mary and John figured out that Jason was Red Hood before Dick spilled the beans, but they were just like “Wow! He works as Red Hood and security? He must be great at his job!”

[certifiablyinsanez]

Okay, I’m not coping well with the emotional whirlpool I’m experiencing after Mastermind. And this scene right here:

Is something that is haunting me. Because it’s not difficult to see what troubles lie ahead for them, what consequences await for the events of the trial. What do we already know about Blitz? That he has deeply hated himself for many years. Maybe he felt slightly better after Millie’s monologue in Ghostfuckers, but I think we all know that such a deep seated hatred of oneself doesn’t disappear in a single conversation. This much is clear by the pictures in Blitz’s apartment still being blacked out that we can see in the background in Mastermind. And any relief he may have felt from Millie’s sincere story is going to be completely shattered.

I have no doubt personally that Blitz has always thought he ruined Stolas’ life. He’s not a stupid man; he’s observant. He knows the struggles Stolas has gone through with the advent of their deal and relationship. He’s seen the wedge he put between him and his daughter. He knows the kind of hell the divorce has put him through. But now?

If there was any doubt he ruined his life before, it’s gone now. Because Stolas has now utterly, and completely, lost everything. His titles, his status, his wealth, his home, his power. All that’s gone. But worse? He’s entirely lost his daughter now. Blitz will probably never forgive himself for that. I mean shit, he literally said this:

Stolas is a much more powerful being than Blitz. But Blitz believes he deserves to die rather than put Stolas in harms way. Blitz will probably be wishing that he died rather than live with the fact that he’s brought Stolas low. Stolas’ punishment is far longer than Blitz’s life span. The consequences of saving his life will outlive him. There no chance Blitz will accept this as Stolas’ choice. Not only will he have to deal with the trauma of the trial before Stolas arrived, but also the result of what it’s done to the man he loves more than life itself.

But Stolas? Stolas would do it again. The way he says it, “Always”, is just so raw and softly powerful. Because he’s just had his powers ripped from his body. He’s lost it all, he’s lost his child. But he would do it again. There was no other choice to be made. There was no alternative. He said it himself:

Stolas is a suicidal figure. He prepped his daughter for the day he wouldn’t be around. He doesn’t value himself or his life at all. He’s suffered tremendously. He probably already believes he’s lost his daughter. His daughter has made it clear that she hates him. Outside of Blitz, who is his light in the darkness, his soulmate and true love, what does he have to live for? To Stolas this was a no brainer. He went to that block with dignity. He was so willing to die for his love.

So when Blitz thanks him for saving his life, Stolas, breathless and weak, says “Always”, because he will always love him, need him, cherish him. He will always put him above himself, which is something Blitz wouldn’t understand but is second nature to a gentle spirit like Stolas. Stolas who escaped the torments of his life in his books, who is humble and sweet with a lowly imp because his body and soul needs Blitz like he needs air. A true romantic, a soft demon who gave it all up for love and would do it again.

Always, he says, and means with every syllable.