#like yeah it was bad and fucked up but I'M built different and we all know that

[oleander-grows]

i think that like. the truly shitty thing about A Certain Kind Of Traumatic Things That Could Happen To Someone As A Child is the way how sometimes you just remember how little you were. today i was like "huh, another 16 months and it'll be 20 years since it happened. i should do something nice to myself on that day."

and then it hits me like a fucking train.when it's been 20 years, i'll only be 27. this happened so long ago that i don't even remember the event itself. my memory is sitting in the office of my childhood therapist, telling her about what happened in the most extreme detail that my 8 year old brain could muster.

i used to be a little girl that was so angry and spiteful that i would make my parents cry because they told me i had to do homework. now im just some dyke who's coworkers comment about my infinite patience when it comes to children who are upset.

[caparrucia]

Full offense and pun fully intended, but I genuinely think the very existence of "dead dove, do not eat" was a fucking canary in the mines, and no one really paid attention.

Because the tag itself was created as a response to a fandom-wide tendency to disregard warnings and assume tagging was exaggerated. And then the same fucking idiots reading those tags describing things they found upsetting or disturbing or just not to their taste would STILL click into the stories and give the writer's grief about it.

And as a response writers began using the tag to signal "no, really, I MEAN the tags!"

But like.

If you really think about it, that's a solution to a different problem. The solution to "I know you tagged your story appropriately but I chose to disregard the tags and warnings by reading it anyway, even though I knew it would upset me, so now I'm upset and making it your problem" is frankly a block, a ban and wide-spread blacklisting. But fandom as a whole is fucking awful at handling bad faith, insidious arguments that appeal to community inclusion and weaponize the fact most people participating in fandom want to share the space with others, as opposed to hurting people.

So instead of upfront ridiculing this kind of maladaptive attempt to foster one's own emotional self-regulation onto random strangers on the internet, fandom compromised and came up with a redundant tag in a good faith attempt to address an imaginary nuance.

There is no nuance to this.

A writer's job is to tag their work correctly. It's not to tag it exhaustively. It's not even to tag it extensively. A writer's sole obligation, as far as AO3 and arguably fandom spaces are concerned, is to make damn sure that the tags they put on their story actually match whatever is going on in that story.

That's it.

That's all.

"But what if I don't want to read X?" Well, you don't read fic that's tagged X.

"But what if I read something that wasn't tagged X?" Well, that's very unfortunate for you, but if it is genuinely that upsetting, you have a responsibility to yourself to only browse things explicitly tagged to not include X.

"But that's not a lot of fic!" Hi, you must be new here, yes, welcome to fandom. Most of our spaces are built explicitly as a reaction to There's Not Enough Of The Thing I Want, both in canon and fandom.

"But there are things on the internet that I don't like!" Yeah, and they are also out there, offline. And, here's the thing, things existing even though we personally dislike or even hate or even flat out find offensive/gross/immoral/unspeakable existing is the price we pay to secure our right to exist as individuals and creators, regardless of who finds US personally unpleasant, hateful or flat out offensive/gross/immoral/unspeakable.

"But what about [illegal thing]?!" So the thing itself is illegal, because the thing itself has been deemed harmful. But your goddamn cop-poisoned authoritarian little heart needs to learn that sometimes things are illegal that aren't harmful, and defaulting to "but illegal!" is a surefire way to end up on the wrong side of the fascism pop quiz. You're not a figure of authority and the more you demand to control and exercise authority by command, rather than leadership, the less impressive you seem. You know how you make actual, genuine change in a community? You center harm and argue in good faith to find accommodations and spread awareness of real, actual problems.

But let's play your game. Let's pretend we're all brainwashed cop-abiding little cogs that do not own a single working brain cell to exercise critical thinking with. 99% of the time, when you cry about any given thing "being illegal!!!" you're correct only so far as the THING itself being illegal. The act or object is illegal. Depiction of it is not. You know why, dipshit? Because if depiction of the thing were illegal, you wouldn't be able to talk about it. You wouldn't be able to educate about it. You wouldn't be able to reexamine and discuss and understand the thing, how and why and where it happens and how to prevent it. And yeah, depiction being legal opens the door for people to make depictions that are in bad taste or probably not appropriate. Sure. But that's the price we pay, creating tools to demystify some of the most horrific things in the world and support the people who've survived them. The net good of those tools existing outweighs the harm of people misusing them.

"You're defending the indefensible!" No, you're clumsily stumbling into a conversation that's been going on for centuries, with your elementary school understanding of morality and your bone-deep police state rot filtering your perception of reality, and insisting you figured it out and everyone else at the table is an idiot for not agreeing with you. Shut the fuck up, sit the fuck down and read a goddamn book.

[lovelykil]

headcanons─

: ➛ killua & gon x reader older ver.

hc; night owl reader

cw; little suggestive themes mentioned

note; I have a huge headache (´ﾍ｀；) also, this was one of the choices everyone wanted so 😛

˗ˏˋ gon

“you're still awake?” o(*´ー` ?)

I'm pretty sure he passes out dead cold right when he hits the sheets. After a long day of training to build his aura and practice his new ability he's tired asf

Bisky gives yall no break

He changes into his muscle shirt and some sweats then jumps right into bed, you following along.

He tells you goodnight and places a little peck on your cheek before clinging onto your arm and snoozing

You're obviously exhausted too from today but somehow can't find yourself to be sleeping, but to ponder.

You think about how you even began to be with the ravenette and how your life changed for the best along side with him.

You wonder if killua actually really liked you or not σ(￣∇￣;)

He always seemed distant or not wanting to deal with you at all, but he always had your back in fights so.. maybe he did have a soft spot for you.

minutes past by.. You're still stuck in your head, looking up at the ceiling.

an hour..

two..

three..

four?!

damn what possibly could you be thinking about

You played a game on your phone soon enough from after all this thinking , the bright screen waking up the teen next to you.

You were actually surprised that woke him up he was literally facing away from you after shifting in his spot countless times.

He sits up with a disturbed expression, rubbing his weary chocolate eyes.

"y/n, can you turn off your phone?"

"I- yeah sorry gon." (￣▽￣;)

With a click the device shut off and was placed beneath your pillow, you sigh quietly to yourself.

"I wonder what your dad looks like." You whispered.

"I'm sure like me" gon tiredly smiled at you. You looked back at him then at the ceiling, you let out a soft chuckle.

"obviously, I bet that's where you got your weird hair"

"hey!" (｀ε´ )

"my bad" ( ￣▽￣)

gon lays back in his spot, his thoughts flooding his mind aswell.

"how long have you been awake?" He lets out, his head turning.

you think before answering.

"awhile."

"awhile!?"

"couldn't sleep"

"bisky isn't gonna go easy on us tomorrow you need to get your rest you know." The boy tugged on your shirt, trying to get you to listen. Your eyes move around the dark room then you grumble.

"okayy" you scoot towards him to feel his warmth, he lays his hand on your shoulder to kiss your cheek and smile.

"we can finally sleep together now!"

"ahhg, yes night gon."

"goodnighttt" (^^)

will make you go to sleep with kisses and hugs

he cares alot about your health and sleeping is the way to extra energy !!

so I don't think he stays up much

If he does it's possibly because of a sleepover with killua

idk I see him needing that beauty rest 🗣‼️

˗ˏˋ killua

“go to sleep WOMEN” o(｀Д´#)

does NOT need that beauty rest 🗣‼️

he can stay awake for awhile 2 to 3 days I think he said?

he just built different 🥶

so match him up with someone who also can't sleep ..

boom

chaos.

jk I'm sure he's pretty chill about it

like you also can't sleep? cool wanna have a pillow fight and watch scary movies??

you two are probably always doing something in the middle of the night.

nothing weird YOU PERV.

I mean, unless..😗

NO.

like sneaking into the kitchen to steal snacks together, quietly so not to wake up kurapika 😓

kil always eats most of them though to piss you off, then you end up yelling at him as he looks at you with his cat smirk

slowly shoving the chips into his mouth.

ooohh that boy gets on your nerves (`へ´*)

he won't admit it but he enjoys these nights with you, he's impressed how long you can stay up till you eventually pass the fuck out

idk cause sometimes at night too he gets a little.. silly.

suddenly his confidence is WAY high in the dark room as you two talk to each other after snacking.

he plays with the ends of your shirt as you sit on his lap and rant about something

"oh? uh-huh. mhm

he's not listening, he wants to rub his hands against your torso from under your shirt as you gasp from the cold sensation of his digits.

maybe even let him take off your shirt if he's lucky.

though, you knew what he was doing there was a reason why he wanted you to sit on his lap 😒

you grin to yourself, shaking your head.

you stopped talking and grabbed his pervy hands.

"I know what you're doing." You whispered.

"damn it, thought I was careful this timee" He whined.

you escape from his lap and lay next to him with a giggle.

"ohh, you're so cute cmere." You tease the boy, listening to him boil in heat. His pale face pink as flamingos as you lean in to kiss his cheek.

suddenly that confidence died out.

"you're so embarrassing.." (≧ヘ≦ )

he muttered irritatedly but he very much enjoyed that peck hoping you would kiss him on the lips now.

in which you did, the kiss was long and gentle. Your hand held his cheek as his landed on yours your lips formed a smile when he did so causing him to break away from the tender kiss and grow more flustered

"WHYD YOU DO THAT-"

"Smile?"

"YEAH.. DON'T DO THAT."

"Because the way your hand went on mine was cute."

". . ."

"You KNOW WHAT go to BED" ////

honestly it's fun being with him, wasting your nights with the albino

and having meaningful (sometimes) conversations at night, the kind where you and him smile together, with nothing but love in each of your eyes.

[cherryc1nnam0n]

Never let you go, baby | Dark!Ethan Landry x Afab!Reader

Due to many requests here it's part two of Before you go, baby. Enjoy ;)

Part 1

Summary: Your plans have been ruined due to your newfound pregnancy, so you come back to Ethan, just how he planned it

Cw: Dark themes, manipulative!Ethan, kidnapping, blackmailing, baby trapping, pregnancy symptoms, vomiting, pregnancy sickness, stalking, mentions of smut

It had been 3 months since you had left for college and now you had to come back, due to something you never expected or planned, a baby...

A baby of your best friend, who you had sex with before you left, without being on the pill and while being a virgin

You thought nothing would happen and that you would be okay, nobody gets pregnant on their first time, right?

Wrong

You were very pregnant, growing Ethan Landry's baby, you sometimes wondered how they would look like, would the baby have his nose?

You shook your head coming back into real life, you were close to your stop on the metro, back home after a long travel, your stomach was rumbling

"Y/n are you okay? You've been in there for a very long time" your friend from college asked from outside the stall you were locked in

"I'm okay, just... I think I ate something bad" you said holding your stomach, hunched down on the toilet

"Okay... I'll wait for you outside" she said going away

"Fuck..." You knew it wasn't food

Your stop was announced and you grabbed your bags and walked out, finally stepping home on the familiar place you knew, your stomach rumbled from hunger, all you had eaten was a sandwich and some tea, not very nutricious

"I know little one, we'll get food soon" you spoke to your tummy

You went past a pizza place, your favorite one from when you were in highschool, you were supposed to wait for Ethan so you went into the shop

"Y/n!" The attendant said coming over to the counter when he saw you "How's it been? Didn't you leave for college?" Small town things

"Uh yeah I did but uhm, I need to take back some stuff" you lied

"Oh okay, the usual?" You nodded

"Yes please"

Soon you were served your favorite flavor of pizza, and ate it like it was the best meal of your life, which you felt it was

"Hungry aye?" He asked you and you just giggled

"Had not eaten today"

"Poor thing, you enjoy that" he went to serve someone else

Your phone rang and you saw a text from Ethan

Where r u?

Tom's pizza

K

Not even 5 minutes later he came in to the shop, smiling at you as he sat down next to you

"Glad you're back" he said grabbing your hand

"Yeah..." You didn't feel so happy about it, but he seemed like it "Can we go home?" He nodded

You were about to grab your wallet when he stopped you

"I'll pay honey, it's okay" he said going to pay for you

"Thanks" you said while walking out

He threw his arm around you, your bag on his shoulder

"No need to thank me babe, that's what I'm here for"

You sighed, you couldn't get used to him calling you cute pet names

"Eth..." He hummed "You said- promised, that nothing would change between us but... It did... Right?"

He thought for a moment, or, acted like it, he had planned this whole thing beforehand and you didn't even know

"Well, yeah technically it does, we're gonna be a family now"

"Yeah I know..." You pouted, not ready for this yet "Did you let mom know that I'm here?"

He swallowed "Yeah, she knows, we'll be there soon, we just need to go to my house to pick something and we'll go to your house, okay?"

"Oh, okay" you said softly

Soon you reached his house and he opened the door for you

"Come in, I'll be right back"

You looked around as he left to who knows where, nothing had changed but it certainly felt different

"What the-" you said when you saw a crib mid built up, but suddenly you were grabbed from behind and you became very sleepy

"Shhhh, it'll be okay my love, I'm never letting you go"

Your eyes drooped until you finally fell asleep, darkness taking over...

Some hours later...

You woke up on a bed, a really comfy bed actually, but you were somewhere different

"Wha-?" You looked around to see if you could recognize something

"Good morning my love" Ethan said coming out of the shadows "Sleep good?"

"Ethan, what the fuck are you doing?!" You yelled at him

He just smiled

"Forming a family that's what I'm doing" he sat down on a chair in front of you "Oh you silly Y/n..." He chuckled making you shiver "You think I didn't know this would happen?"

You swallowed heavily "What would happen?"

"You getting pregnant of course" he said standing up "This was all part of my plan, I would get you pregnant and that way you would be mine, forever" he said in front of you, making you back away "Don't be afraid baby, I won't hurt you, I love you too much to do that, never when you're growing my baby" he said touching your tummy "So precious..."

"Ethan... It doesn't have to be this way, please don't lock me away"

"Oh it'll be temporary, until you get used to being my little housewife, only good for breeding and staying at home, being all pretty and full of my babies" he kissed your cheek "I know you'll be good for me baby"

You should be scared, you should be running away, smacking him away, fighting back but... All you did was give in, you loved Ethan and you had always been an outcast, no one had ever asked you out of even had a crush on you, and now this boy, this handsome boy is wanting to keep you all to himself? You couldn't say no to that, could you?

"I'll be good for you Eth..."

"Good girl..."

...........................................................

Requested by:

@ethanslaundry @angel-of-the-eon @yourslxttysurprise

[rightpastnowhere]

TLOVM season 3 episode 3 thoughts from someone who's slowly losing her mind

PART ONE: campaign vex and perc'ahlia VS tlovm vex and perc'ahlia

(yeah. yeah it's part one. i have so many thoughts gang)

SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT

okay. so. i feel like i've made it clear how much i ADORE the perc'ahlia relationship timeline in campaign 1. and it remains to this day one of my absolute favorites, and i was very afraid of it being changed in tlovm. BUT. i'm actually kind of fucking obsessed with these changes.

because, really, campaign!vex and tlovm!vex are two entirely separate characters. they're still the same vex at their core, but the changes to the narrative in tlovm have changed the show version of vex in ways that i think are perfectly suited to the "i'm going to turn this into a fling even though we're both fooling ourselves" plotline. tlovm!vex seems overall more committed to the facade she puts out. she's a bit colder in the beginning, and has slowly thawed over the past two seasons, but not in the same way campaign!vex has by this point in the c1 plot, and like. on the one hand, it might just be a personality shift for the adaptation! something to make more clear-cut character archetypes. on the other hand, i keep remembering that vox machina haven't been a party for as long in tlovm. she's still questioning whether or not to stay with the party in season one. she doesn't have as strong of a foundation with these people, less trust and less comfort. she's got so many more walls built up.

and that, of course, includes her relationship with percy. campaign!perc'ahlia, in my eyes, is a friends to lovers slowburn. it's been mentioned that they hit it off well from the beginning, and while they both were attracted to each other to some degree, they both dismissed it as a bad idea and moved on. over the year of in-game time they spent together (maybe more? i get confused with the timeline) before we even see them on screen, they build up a steady and solid friendship. one filled with flirting and teasing, but still a friendship. and it's clear that they both value this connection they have, especially in the briarwood arc, with the mask and all of that loveliness. and sure, some of that could be read as romantic, but it's love all the same. vex loved percy before she was in love with him, and that dynamic is one she's terrified to lose! "wouldn't it be so awkward, though?" she says, as if she's already decided that all that confessing would do would be adding tension, that there's no chance of reciprocity.

in tlovm, though? it's barely been any time at all. she's fallen in love with percy in the same time it's taken to really be his friend, to find that she can trust him and rely on him. the weight of their history isn't nearly as bulky, here. sure, she won't dare risk any revelations of her feelings or any attempts at a serious relationship, but sex doesn't have to mean anything. if it makes things awkward then, well, they're still settling into their dynamic as friends anyway - things can be shuffled around and fall into different places. there's nothing solid yet to risk, if that makes sense. they're still building a foundation, she can build around the cracks.

and another significant point of divergence: syldor. i have a lot of thoughts on the feywild arc and the changes made, but i'm going to disregard all of that now because they're, same as vex, basically different characters. to put it simply: tlovm!syldor is harsh and gives bad attention, whereas campaign!syldor is neglectful and doesn't give enough attention. as a result, we see that tlovm!vex seeks out good attention, whereas campaign!vex avoids getting close enough to anyone for them to pull the rug out from underneath her. tlovm!vex initiates a fling, a dynamic of gratification and positive attention without emotional weight, because actually being in a relationship can result in that trust being used against you. she trusted in her father, and he used being her father as a way to beat her down. campaign!vex doesn't even try to initiate anything, because she fears the silence, the lack of reciprocity and care, the fear of being turned down. she tried to build a connection with her father, and was met with silence and quiet disapproval and barely even a second glance. i don't know if this makes any sense, and i'm bad at words, but these feel like different fears of rejection to me? and yet they're both fears of rejection, something that is at the core of vex's actions and personality in both adaptations.

two different stories of a person driven by fear, and i love them for their differences!! they both feel more fitting for their versions of canon!!! and both make me insane!!!!!!!!

[jjclopelover]

How he talks to/about her v.s. How he talks to/about him

I'm back with more analysis' about JJPope and why it's better than anything either of them had with Kie.

Today I'm talking about JJ and how he speaks of and to them and why the difference in how he does it speaks VOLUMES.

JJ talking about Kie (S1): "Of course, I'm hitting on her. She's a super-hot, rich, hippie chick, slumming with us. Why? I can't figure it out either, but who cares, bro? I know that door's locked because I tried it. Have you?"

JJ talking about Pope(S2): "Ain't all that bad. Just look at the guy over there. He would do anything for us. That's a Pouge if I've ever seen one. Bone-deep. That's just one man's opinion, though."

THE DIFFERENCE.

JJ talking to/about Pope:

"For once in your life, trust someone else."

~~~

"You're the golden boy."

~~~

Topper: "Hey, I just wanna make sure everyone here is okay with ending up in federal prison."

JJ: "Uh, if it gets to that, yeah, I'll do it for Pope."

~~~

"I'm here for you, Pope. Welcome to my world, okay?"

~~~

JJ talking to/about Kie:

"And you--I mean, you're already rich as fuck anyway. Why would you bother?"

~~~

"Okay. Not all of us can afford unlimited data plans, Kiara."

~~~

"Hell of a job melting it down, Dr.Frankenstein."

~~~

(I don't need to put anymore as all of JJ's quotes for Kie are from the first half of S1 lol.)

As you can see, JJ speaks highly of Pope and lowly of Kie. He sees being a pouge as a badge of honor and gave Pope the highest honor. He sees Pope as someone he can relate too and shares a deep connection too.

He doesn't see that with Kie.

And I hear Jiara stans saying "What about S3? He was so worried about her and went back to get her!"

And to that, I say, "Yeah...cuz it's JJ."

His number one trait as a character is his loyalty. It's his best trait as it shows how much he will do for his friends. But also his worst trait as he puts his friends over his own being and in the end it only hurts him.

JJ would have reacted the same if it was anyone else in that situation.

Like when John B was a wanted criminal, JJ did anything for him. (risking to get arrested himself, shooting cops, and being by his side when he was on the run)

Or when Sarah is dealing with Ward or Rafe, JJ is always watching over her. (running after a car that held a drugged Sarah unconscious in the back, jumping in a shipping crate to get her and the cross back, staying by her side, and keeping an eye on her when John B was found guilty in court.)

And even Cleo who just joined the crew, JJ makes sure to treat her like the rest of the pouges. (like when he praised her for convincing Pope's parents to let him go to South America)

And we all know that he would do the same if not more for Pope. (going to jail for him, almost getting arrested for him again, taking over an entire boat of men to get his cross plus Sarah, risking being seen with him at Midsummers when he was supposed to be undercover, taking a beating from his dad for him, fighting for him at the outdoor movie, being super protective about him anytime he was around Limbrey and Renfield, keeping the secret that Pope was the one who actually sunk the boat and lying to the others, bringing Pope to his cousin Ricky's house to save his life even tho Ricky was still pissed at him for stealing his ambulance.)

And many, MANY, more.

The way we are introduced to JJ who loves and protects Pope but pushes Kie aside

versus

The way they "built up" S3 JJ for a toxic relationship with Kie but as a result of that he has to push Pope aside.

The writers and creators gave us s1 JJ, that's how his character was made and supposed to be portrayed. S3 JJ was built off toxic fans who threatened their way into an unfortunate canon ship.

Toxic stans = Toxic ship.

You Jiara stans wonder why JJ felt out of character, or why the Jiara chemistry felt forced or fake. That's because it was.

You can't force chemistry.

All the OBX cast did chemistry reads to see which duos worked together as a couple and which didn't. But the one duo that did not do a chemistry read was JJ and Kie (Rudy and Madi)

why?

because the creators saw no need. as they weren't even thinking of getting those two characters together. JJ was supposed to end up with Cleo. That was one of the many reasons Cleo came back as a main character.

What they would do with Kie and Pope, I don't know and I don't care. But Any ending would have been better than canon Jiara.

Anywaysssss

JJ treats Pope like he's his partner

and

JJ treats Kie like she's his sister

But let's be honest...we all see that, don't we?

Editor's note: Sry this took so long lol, life's been busy :)

[gluzzo]

Brennan Lee Mulligan during the fireside chat for The Wizard, The Witch, and The Wild One - Episode 9

[Image ID:

Screenshots of excerpts from the transcript of the Worlds Beyond Number podcast’s fireside chat on The Wizard, The Witch, and The Wild One - Episode 9.

Brennan Lee Mulligan: And, to me, that describes so many heartbreaking situations, where something deep and true does come, like- the number one belief I have, in terms of like, whatever my secular morality is— is that there's a weird attitude in some parts of our culture, that like, impulses are sinful, and morality is like a structure?

Aabria Iyengar: YES!

Brennan Lee Mulligan: And that bullshit. Moral impulses are incredibly real. Nobody needs to explain what's wrong with-think of the first age you are, where someone's mean to another kid, or an animal, and something in you goes, "Wrong!!" And that's primal.

[…]

Brennan Lee Mulligan: And like it's-it's brutal! It's very Imperial. It's like this oppressive weight, from a very smart opponent, who is convincing themselves. Like, the reason the arguments have that urgency, is that Suvi is also self-indoctrinating, and it's part of that thing that comes back up. And I think the big, sinister part of, of….. The idea of principle. Like, what, in principle, is different from a demon being bound in a circle of salt, and what you saw happening to Naram out under the derrick. This is-I don't have time to explain this in this talk back. I have issues with the philosophic concept of principle, point blank.

[…]

Brennan Lee Mulligan: Yes. And I think that the idea of principle, from-especially to a wizard, who is all about organization, taxonomy, patterns, and systems-principle is this idea that, maybe is built on sand, right?

Aabria lyengar: Yeah.

Brennan Lee Mulligan: When we think about "what are your principles," we use it as a synonym for being a good person. "Are you principled?" But the idea of principle being like, maxims, axioms, "What are some rules that I can ALWAYS follow?" And speaking of them, like, if you go back to Aristotle's Golden Mean, maybe living by principles produces bizarre, immoral edge cases.

[…]

Brennan Lee Mulligan: So it's this idea of, like-but it's unexamined by Suvi in that moment, and the reason it's unexamined, is because I think it's one of the main tools of the indoctrination of the Empire. What have you already accepted? Right? I see this in ethical discourse all the time, which is why whataboutism is so powerful, in modern philosophical discourse, is people go like, "Okay. You've made a moral point. You've made a call to action. You've said, 'we need to do something to make the world better.' So what I'm going to do is find some other moral failing of yours, hold it up in front of you and say, 'but you did this bad thing like this,' or this other situation occurred that was similar to this, where you did not act. So wouldn't you in fact, be a hypocrite by acting or not acting in a similar way this time?'''

Brennan Lee Mulligan: Which sounds, when you see it in the world, like sound moral reasoning, and it's garbage.

Taylor Moore: [Laughs]

Brennan Lee Mulligan: Because it's basically saying, like, "Instead of helping, why don't you be consistent?" And it's like-

[…]

Brennan Lee Mulligan: It's like stupid. What the fuck is the point of consistency? Like principle as a measurement of consistency, and the Fox's whole deal would be like, "Yeah, yesterday I did something bad and today I'm going to do something good because I want to." That's all.

Erika Ishii: Yeah.

Brennan Lee Mulligan: And someone would be like, "You're a hypocrite." And he'd be like, "Okay! I'm gonna get some fish slurry."

End ID.]

[ezra-editss]

I finally got myself to watch X-Men Dark Phoenix, after a lot of you warned me and told me not to.

I think what bothered me the most weren't the things that didn't make sense, but the fact it was so fucking serious. There were NO JOKES and NO HAPPINESS. It felt like they didn't have fun with this movie. This is so unusual for marvel movies and a scene like the one with Peter in the Pentagon in Days of Future Past, would've helped this movie so much. The only happiness we got were the minutes 8-18 and the very last scene.

Because I heard a lot about people being bothered with what they did with Charles, let's talk about that. I think he's blamable for some stuff and for some not.

Lying to Jean as a kid might've been the wrong choice, but it was a hard one and I get it. I also don't think it made that much of a difference overall.

Blocking away most of her power, technically not that stupid of an idea, terrible execution. He should've tried to help her control it, but more like he did with Erik. I think if she'd grown up with all her power, it could've worked. And if it wouldn't have, then he could've done it, if it was her wish. She didn't want all that power, so if she had tried for a long time and it just didn't work, I feel like she would've wanted it herself. So this is on him, like he admitted.

Can't say they did him wrong here tho, as he literally did this in the old timeline too.

Where they did him wrong tho was his reaction to Raven's death tho, because why was he barely bothered😭. And even tho I don't really blame him for it, HE would.

I might be alone with this, but besides some of his reactions or the lack of those, I do think the first half of the movie is, in that sense, not bad. I like the conflict and I do believe Charles could lose himself when he finds a way that works really well. He dreamed of that his entire life, so him losing sight of the thing as a whole, when he gets it, doesn't seem out of character to me.

Who was way more out of character was ERIK. I WAS SO MADDDD. At least in the middle of the movie. I first liked what they did with him, having built something that's similar to what Charles did. Protecting mutants. And then he tells Jean what he learned.. AND THEN GOES EVIL AGAIN?! I'M SORRY?! That was so god damm unnecessary, as we already had Jean and fucking aliens😭. And over Raven's death?? Why are they suddenly acting like he cares for her deeply, when all the other movies only ever proved the opposite. Like, yeah he's a better person now, I guess he cares more, BUT THAT HE'D KILL AGAIN? The only way I might've been ready to accept this, would've been if Charles had died. BUT EVEN THEN.

And then he's more mad than ever, doesn't even accept the "old friend", makes fun of Charles speeches, just to have "a change of heart" OVER ONE OF THOSE SPEECHES.

They should've just fought side by side, it would've worked, just as well.

THE ENDING THO?? I wanna thank you all, because noone spoiled me that they fucking live together now???!

This was a lot for my head, holy shit.

[allwormdiet]

Interlude 7

Hi Miss Militia, sorry your superpower is just being a living weapon

No dancing around on this one, huh, just straight into the meat of it

Is Kovan our first dead kid/teen in this story? I feel like the child violence is steadily increasing over time. Vista, the ABB conscripts, Dinah, now this.

Also this shit is brutal

Fuck.

Sometimes you just have that sudden, instinctual understanding that something bad is nearby. Not usually something so devastating as a pit trap or landmine, but just that moment of the hindbrain screaming at you that something's not right.

Hey fucker, you sure showed up early, huh

So. Fucked up geometric crystalline entity that exists in multiple overlapping states or realities at once. Piece of it comes off and impacts her, bada bing bada boom she has powers and, conveniently, no recollection of the vision.

Ladies, gentlemen, and those of you who know better, cosmic horror has entered the chat, and it's giving out free goodies to unsuspecting participants

Crystal Superpower Cthulhu legitimately looked at this child and was like "oh I know how to turn the circumstances of your trauma into a superpower! I'm just going to give you Gun."

This feels a lot more on the nose than it's been for everyone else so far, but what do I know

Yeah here we go

"Good news, you never have to sleep again. Bad news, your brain will be on at all times and when you try to shut it off you will remember the worst day of your life in fucking IMAX quality"

Also feels very appropriately sinister that nobody can remember Crystal Superpower Cthulhu except in dreams of their trigger event, if you can even call it a dream.

Wow! Even more reason to doubt the Wards program, huh? They just dropped this kid into that life without her say-so and that cooked her for however long it took to graduate, at which point she obviously became a lifelong member.

Miss Militia is fully in it, huh? That's the kind of indoctrination you straight up can't pry yourself out of unless you have a damn good reason to suspect that's what's up, and it sounds like she never got that reason.

Yeah of course she's a dutiful little daughter and student and soldier. What else has she got? Not even the other kids from her hometown. Fuck me. Isolate and steep in the propaganda.

Oh no. Oh no she believes the American Dream exists. Oh Hana I'm so sorry, they just made that up to sell houses in the suburbs.

...Fuck, that's just it, isn't it. Hana was a victim of the grinding machinery of empire, and that was the pressure cooker situation that made her trigger. And now she's a component of a different, larger empire, grinding more of its targets into the same fuel that she almost became, but she doesn't even see it.

She didn't have a chance.

Speaking of chances. Hana, do you want to live in a world where God favors Kaiser as much as he favors you? Like that's just the problem of evil times a hundred.

Oh hey you two

Colin you have got to be careful what you wish for, man, you live in a world where superpowers are built off of fucking monkey's paw logic

Pity.

Haha uh oh

This is the first time we've heard Case 53 used, yeah? Same as Newter and Gregor? Hmm.

Now this is kind of an interesting conversation, having to figure out what the hell to do about what junior members you can or else have to give away

Okay so they know Shadow Stalker is trouble

...How much do they know beyond that, and how have they been dealing with her? Because I don't think it's working, and at least one person is just straight up not doing their job

I'd love to feel sorry for Armsmaster in this moment, but my dude is in desperate need of some fucking humility, and honestly I'm not sure he was ever meant to be in a leadership position. He just doesn't have the temperament for it.

So, first off, insane that the Endbringers are keyed in enough to human civilization to know what hurts most for them to target

Second off: Coil you stupid fucker your gun jumping on the Empire accelerated the entire city into apocalypse! Arrogant bastard wants to run Brockton Bay so bad that he just tripped and dropped his little city diorama all into a trash can full of rotting fish. Fucking jackass.

The Endbringers can bring media response into consideration for their attacks?? What the fuck kind of operation are these kaiju running?

Oh god fucking dammit.

Armsmaster is going to try and get his glory by killing an Endbringer.

Current Thoughts

Somebody needs to tell these people the genre of story that they're in for real. This isn't gritty sci-fi, this isn't something about the power of faith, this is about an alien intelligence using Earth and humanity for purposes that are, at best, utterly ambivalent to the ongoing existence of either of those things.

Also I feel a lot worse for Miss Militia but it seems like she hasn't reflected on like, any of her baggage beyond the most surface level stuff of "boy I'm sure fucking glad I'm not in that village anymore"

[lyss-sketchbox]

Ok coming off anon because I'm trying to conquer the constant social anxiety lmao (same person who sent you Longass Thoughts on Natlan AQ) - SO YEAH personally I like Ei's character but foaming a bit at the mouth because I feel like my favorite parts of her character (namely she was NOT ready to be the archon when makoto kicked the bucket, she's got that good ol' warrior-weapon mindset knocking around in there- having her actually confront the ugly truth of the consequences of her actions was such a missed opportunity. it would've been SO good to see her actually get confronted personally without any sugarcoating. i think her learning to be less of a shitty archon would've been so much better then)

also like. im sure there were a lot of ways to improve Inazuma's story but personally i thought it would've been cooler if kokomi was a bit more. morally grey lmao. like willing to do not-so-nice things to fight god because that's what they're doing. mortals attempting to defy the god that holds dominion over their land (bc the electro archon isn't really Watatsumi's god specifically!! bc uh lmao ei killed him lol)

but yea for real in natlan every "serious problem" was severely undercut by "actually it's all good now" like "kachina is totally fine after being chased by the abyss in the afterlife, she was protected by the wayob so it's all good and she's also mentally ok" and it's like what. what are you talking about.

AND THE ARchON thing i feel like im the only one who has a gripe. tbf the story is not done yet BUT MY QUESTION IS CELESTIA ALLOWED A HUMAN (MULTIPLE EVEN) TO ASCend to the divine throne???? Like what??? IT feels like it runs counter to everything-

and like uh feels like we got really really far away from like. when you talk about the archon war in liyue it was a literal bloodbath. sacrifices upon sacrifices were made, the modern day liyue was built upon the corpses of friend and foe alike because there was no other choice. you couldn't abstain, you would die.

but in natlan???? no gods??? what???? im just losing it more than a bit over here that natlan is trying simultaneously to be a grim land of constant war but also sunshine friendship and rainbows.

at this point im prepared to be disappointed and just crossing my fingers the good writing comes back for snezhnaya's AQ bc if they fuck up snezhnaya i will literally never forgive them

Its all good man, youre so welcome to debate and talk off anon, we may disagree but never hate.

Im putting all my ramblings under cut since its gonna be as equally long and spoilery hdjsnsn

About Ei

I completely forgot about how Ei was originally a kagemusha, a weapon for her sister, her sister did all the archon work while Ei simply stood by her side. Its makes perfect sense that after the death of her sister, she would make very bad not thought out decisions and because she is an archon now, those bad decisions has really really bad aftermaths.

I personally do not have any gripes about her being basically clueless about the outside world. Grief manifests in different ways and locking yourself away and justifying it as a twisted way to gain enlightment of eternity the way your sister did, it can make sense. It is a consequence!! She is clueless of how to be an archon and what is going on in her nation, her SQ could have been used to show her trying to understand and emphatize with her people to be a better archon. NOT A REASON TO MAKE HER AN uwu sad defenseless waifu cant cook and doesnt know anything. Brother she fucking killed people and almost destroyed her nation.

About Kokomi

I like the idea of morally grey kokomi actually. It makes alot of sense. Kokomi and the watatsumi people might have some vishap descendance but they are still humans, even less so with visions. Theyre also lacking the supplies and expertise needed to continue a war with an entire nation and its archon. It would make sense that she would accept the fatuis help since they share the sentiment of 'getting to inazuma and its archon'.

But it was shown she wasnt even aware who the anonymous donor is, hell she wasnt aware people where using delusions until people starts dying. And for a girl who wrote an entire guide book with 100 different alternate plans, HOW DO YOU NOT SEE THIS COMING...............

About Natlan's system

Yeah they really brushed off the dying part and potentially being stuck in genshin limbo if you dont get out in time too casually. The tiny child you retrieved from limbo also is... very chill and not mentally scarred or anything, she wasnt putting up a brave face, she was simply unaffected?????? One on kachina's voiceovers is gonna talk about her death but im not friendship 4 with her yet. I hope it explains SOMETHING.

Yeah the first time i heard that the archon was human and has been replaced multiple times had me gawking too, i can excuse that Celestia has been strangely inactive FOR NOW.

I wanted to bring up how the hydro archon throne being broken and Neuvi regaining his sovernity didnt even call Celestia to action but GUESS WHAT??? I DONT KNOW IF NATLAN HAPPENED BEFORE OR AFTER FONTAINE BECAUSE THEY DECIDE TO LOWER THE REQUIREMENTS TO DO NATLAN AQ!!!!!!! But well if it happened after (since Neuvis end dialogue told us to go to Natlan next), well... Celestia isnt called either so theyve just been inactive for 500 years of Natlans weird system ig.

About the """Nation of War"""

Yeah man. Sacrifices and war was dealt better in liyue. Same as Natlan, it is a nation built of war. There was war in the past, sacrifices were made to built the liyue we know now. But the sacrifices in liyue was not brushed off or belittled, those sacrifices had meaning and the people of liyue hold very high regards for the fallen. In Natlan? Its treated like some sort of sick hunger games event, they made war into entertainment.

Oh but they need the tournaments to keep the natlan fire alive. THEN RUN A SEPERATE FUCKING TOURNEY?????? MAKE EVERYONE WHO HAS AN ANCIENT NAME HAVE PROPER TRAINING AND GO TO WAR IN ARMIES PROPER???? THIS SHIT DOESNT NEED TO BE ENTERTAINMENT AND YET YOU DID. Maybe the flames are small BECAUSE YOU PICK ONLY 5 PEOPLE EVERYTIME WHEN THERES LITERALLY NO REASON VETERANS LIKE KINICH AND MUALANI TO SIT IT OUT JUST BECAUSE THEY LOST.

Oh but the ode of resurrection only works on limited people THEN SEND OUT THE BEST PEOPLE THEN???????? MUALANI, A 3 TIMES VETERAN, LOST TO KACHINA. CLEARLY THE TOURNEYS ARENT RELIABLE TO PICK WHO TO SEND.

While i can understand that while Liyue is past war and Natlan is still in war, this is... not how people in war act. The entertainment the happiness the hospitality. Its not efforts to keep morale high its literally just... happy people, sometimes they get attacked by abyss monsters yeah cool but otherwise theyre completely happy just living like that. Thats why the Nation of War thing isnt working at all, these people are not how people STILL IN WAR act. Theres no anxiety no uncertainty no worry at all, not even a smidget. These people live like happy prospering people.

You know what happened to people tryna be happy prospering people while still in war in liyue? Havria.

I hope they bring back the high AR requirement for snezhnaya so snezhnaya can be chronologically correct. I hope they take snezhnaya seriously. I hope Natlan atleast wont pull an inazuma and tripped at the very end

NONE OF THAT POWER OF FRIENDSHIP BS EITHER I didnt believe it when mualani fucking knocked it over our heads over and over and over again and its not gonna work now.

[mychemicalnations]

What the fuck, NaNo???????

this is a long post, buckle up.

Okay, if you haven't heard anything about NaNoWriMo's statement about the use of AI in writing, I am both jealous of you and here to ruin that for you.

The folks over at National Novel Writing Month have released a statement (which you can read here) that explicitly says that being Anti-genAI is classist and ableist. My gut reaction is that this is a fucking asinine take -- poor and disabled people have been writing for longer than we've even had the electricity that powers AI -- but the more I think about it, the angrier I get about the anti-community sentiment that they seem to be pushing.

The claims that are made in this statement are either non-issues or something that AI does not actually fix. Yeah, not everyone can afford to hire an editor, but that is a large part of why writing communities exist both in-person and online. Exchange works with a friend and help each other out, find a discord server and ask there. Make use of a writing community. The same thing applies to ableism; Yeah, we all have different abilities and not everyone can "see" what might need improvement. So you share your work with another writer and get feedback from your community. Writing is a skill that needs to be honed and in order to do that, you have to be okay with being bad at it sometimes.

I'm not even sure I can say much about their "General access" paragraph because, like... AI is not going to fix the systemic issues with the publishing industry. It just won't. That entire paragraph gets half-way to a point and then falls on its ass into the void.

As if I wasn't angry enough, NaNoWriMo edited the statement about 8 hours ago to say "Note: we have edited this post by adding this paragraph to reflect our acknowledgment that there are bad actors in the AI space who are doing harm to writers and who are acting unethically."

This makes me want to throw my computer out a fucking window. Using AI in writing or any other art is inherently unethical because the language models being used are trained on works by people who did not consent to their work being used to train said AI. It is theft. It is plagiarism. Plain and simple. Chat-GPT was trained using the entirety of the New York Times archive, so when you use Chat-GPT, what it produces is based off of the work of NYT journalists (read about the resulting lawsuit here). It's not that there are "bad actors", the programs themselves are built on stealing writing. We've known this for what feels like ages now. This is such a bullshit edit and a fucking sad attempt at saving their asses.

I am someone that doesn't even use Grammarly anymore because they literally market themselves as an AI writing assistant and I'm not willing to risk my entire degree for an application that can't even handle vernacular and dialect and makes mid suggestions at best. Genuinely fuck off and block me if you support the use of AI in writing. Also, my block button is rated E for Everyone and I will use it liberally if anyone comes into my notes supporting genAI. Unless I am feel particularly combative, then you will feel the full weight of my academic and creative integrity. You have been warned.

[still-a-morosexual-help]

New rec: Choices book I actively avoided for years because the cover art gives "supernatural love triangle between the 'nice guy' & the 'bad boy'" and it's a trope I despise except turns out I'm an idiot because holy shit this was one of my favourite books

For one, the vampire lore is unique? Or at least uncommon enough that it feels like something new. It's even different from Choices' other vampire series

Second? Both LIs are wrong about their view on vampires and actually have to come to terms with this and learn to change and grow throughout the series. If anything, MC's the only one who's got it right. Both LIs have their own flaws & trauma while still being interesting and likeable characters and neither one is pushed above the other as being "the correct choice".

It also doesn't make the "bad boy" so antagonistic towards MC and the "nice guy" so sweet that it makes no sense for MC to pick the bad boy (*cough*choices' save the date*cough* my favourite is the antagonistic LI but also he's so hot & cold towards MC and a jerk to her for no real reason???). MC clicks with both of them in a different way and there's enough reason for MC to choose either one of them. It actually shows why MC needs both of them

Also, MC is initially built up in a way before they interact with the LIs so that all of their decisions throughout the story actually make sense. They're responsible but also insanely competitive. Despite staying in line presumably throughout their life, they're drawn towards anything that'll give them a shot of adrenaline

Plus all three characters get their time to shine and MC's a fucking badass, honestly they're up there with om's MC as being one of the more interesting & fun to play MCs

And MY favourite, absolute favorite thing about this, the main thing that shot this up to one of my favourite choices stories:

MC makes a Buffy reference in this. That means at one point they watched and/or read Buffy and/or Angel, saw her get together with first the tortured ""good guy"" and then later the rebellious ""bad boy"", saw all the love triangle discourse in the fandom and said well that's fucking stupid, watch me introduce them both to the concept of polyamory that's right it's NOT a fucking love triangle

or it can be if you want it to, like you can choose one of the two LIs but the "true" route, the one where you get a charm each from both LIs and complete MC's charm bracelet (usually the indicator of a fully completed story in any choices book is to complete a set of something) is the one where MC picks both of them

There are also frequent instances where the choices are [no romantic option at all] and [romantic option for both LIs eg: holding both their hands]

And yeah the LIs aren't in love with each other and spend a lot of time competing for MC, something they do right until the very end of the book BUT at about the midway point they become a proper team and start talking about the three of them as an inseparable team making it very clear that if this doesn't end with MC choosing both of them it's gonna turn into a me and you and your friend steve situation.

And then when either one of them talks about how much they care about MC they start using "we" and "our" [eg: "that's our girl/boy" when the two LIs are alone together]

And then they start being as protective of each other as they are of MC

Cas screaming "don't touch him" when Gabriel gets attacked + Gabriel throwing himself over and shielding both MC & Cas when they get attacked

I'm not saying they're in love or that they'll ever fall in love but they are much much more okay with sharing a partner with each other than either one is willing to admit

anyway, this is them:

[mycurrentobsessionis]

I get why people are so mad at Milo, I really do...

(spoilers for The Night Market)

But, first of all, accidently summoning fucking Cthullu because you literally Do Not Know how to do your job is, uh, relateable somehow. Then proceeding to stab Cthullu because you panicked is objectively funny. Like. I got over the initial shock of that ending (because wtf, Milo?!?!?), and the confusion (like what did I do to get the bad ending???), and then it was ALL laughs. Like, daaaaamn, Malcolm is gonna be pissed, dude!

Legit, Milo isn't even malicious here, y'know? He's, like, a horse loose in a hospital -- he's just as confused as you are! He's never been in a hospital before!

Also, on a serious note, it's like, fair enough, okay. Because Hazel won't leave the Market, because she won't leave without Malcolm (living, dead, or undecided). Malcolm either can't or won't leave. Every probably can't leave. Milo probs doesn't care if he dies, but that's his family. And, I mean, the MC was dying irregardless. In his brain, this was the thing that would save them, too. All he had to do was give up their trust and love (platonic or otherwise), and they walked away. Limping and heartbroken, sure, but alive. Not saying it's fair, but you know. People do massively fucked up shit for love and for fear, and Milo has both. What he does is selfless from a certain point of view -- he gave up the affection and goodwill (that he probably thinks he doesn't deserve anyway), and everyone lives. He loved them all enough to lose them. And yeah, it was in fucked up way that is not the way to do shit, but.

As a future trauma-informed clinician, Milo's brain is legitimately built different. That man is on fight-or-flight 24/7, and I'm not convinced he isn't in a manic episode for at least part of the book. We know he's not sleeping and is drinking pretty heavily toward the end. That does not bode well.

Honestly, it was a shocker ending only because I didn't expect the author to go there, but it makes sense. This is a severely mentally ill man who spent ten years literally carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders, on top of his own unprocessed grief and trauma, and trying to make sure his equally mentally ill friend is alright, and sort of single-parenting a dead child. Then you have the fact that he was meeting pretty regularly with Baron fucking Palpatine, who was probably manipulating him. And yeah, you can say that he's a grown man but... When you live your life focused on survival, you literally do not develop the kind of executive functioning skills you need to withstand that shit. You can develop them later in life, but it is significantly more difficult.

In a lot of cases, I do not argue for mental illness being a defense for the kind of fuckery that he got up to, but shit, man. Milo has such a deep-seated sense of self-loathing, and the amount of vitriol thrown against him so intense and utterly unsympathetic. The whole cast uses the MC for their own ends. They all put the MC at direct risk. At least Milo believes he's saving them.

Anyhoo... romanced him because Zinnia won't let me play as his therapist LOL.

[tenebrous-academic]

About the previous anon. I agree that we did get something but felt like we didn't get anything (?) to indicate their relationship status. I'm not wording this correctly. I mean we know they've been together for a while, *possibly* spending the night at eo's, but at the same time buck haven't talked about tommy apparently? (Idk if it's just bobby or the 118).

It feels like they're still in the testing things out/dating area and not boyfriends just yet, which is fine really.

But I'm hoping the hospital scene is gonna be a step for them getting closer, tommy being there for buck to relay on and get the support and comfort from him. It's gonna be a waste not to use this scene to advance their relationship.

I really hope next episode provides some solid information as to their canon status too! But buckle up because I’m about to overanalyze the fuck out of the scenes we did get:

Based off of this episode, I think it’s safe to say they’ve been seeing each other for at least a few months. During the award ceremony it was mentioned the cruise ship disaster happened “last March.” I didn’t see anything showing what month it current is, but based off the wording we can at least assume enough time has passed for it to be considered last year and not “this March.” That gives the relationship at least 3-5 months depending on how long it took Buck to work up to courage to call Tommy for the first tour of the harbour.

Buck and Tommy have also been together long enough for Tommy to feel comfortable enough to talk about how he was treated by Captain Gerrard and, likely, how he behaved around Chim and Hen back then. I wish we could have actually seen that, as well as the scenes between Tommy, Chim, and Hen hashing things out to make sure there’s no bad blood, but all we have are these new interactions showing all of them as friends now and the past firmly behind them.

But!!! What we did get this episode!

Buck softly signing when he sees Tommy getting his award and beaming like a proud partner.

Buck and Tommy being in sync as they walk around the station together.

Buck giving his bitchiest glare to Gerrard and putting his body between his man and that piece of filth (Chim is iconic for that new nickname).

We also get Buck shown as Tommy’s family/loved one during the ceremony. A clear pattern is established with Hen getting her medal and Karen and the kids clapping, Chimney getting his medal and Maddie clapping, and then Tommy getting his medal and the camera panning over to Buck as he breathes deeply and glows in pride for Tommy. (I also acknowledge that Eddie is shown after Buck gets his medal, but the show has established that Eddie and Chris are family to Buck so I don’t think there’s anything to shippy about it).

He hasn’t talked to Bobby about it, and we don’t know if he’s been talking to anyone else, but we do know that it’s not a secret. That hospital kiss was his announcement and maybe he’s happy with that being the extent of it. I think Buck is the kind of person to keep his happiness to his chest a little bit longer to make sure that it’s his and not everyone else’s. Which I know goes against his past relationships and how he’s always talked about them - but Tommy feels different, so the way Buck would treat their relationship would be different too. It’s something he was to protect and nurture and he doesn’t feel the need to ask his family about it because he already knows the answers.

So, yeah, definitely not as much as I would have liked, but the pieces of their relationship ship we did get were pretty indicative of something solid and meaningful being built between them. I’m crossing every finger the finale gives us more though. We’re being given scraps and I think we’re all going a little feral over the lack of anything truly substantial.

[aces-solace]

Help

Pairings: hobie brown x kid!venom!Male!reader

Warnings: fluff, cussing, bad British slang, reader has dreads, mentions of running away, suicidal thoughts. If any of these things make you uncomfortable don't read! Let me know if I missed anything!

A/N: kinda self indulgent I also love the idea of hobie helping a kid with a parasite venom.

You gagged slightly as the taste of blood filled your mouth. You blinked away the tears before walking away from the former strangers. They were strangers anyway. Why you should care? Why does it hurt? You somehow ended up on top of building the guilt and built up sadness from over the years screaming to do it. The anger and the hatred from over the years screaming something entirely different. They deserved it. You deserve to live. When a thought came to mind. Spider punk.

you've seen him use his guitar on tons of police men and women! Sure they might have died but still. It's gonna hurt. He probably won't do it. Yes he will, who are you kidding. You won't be able to find him though. Plus what if venom tries to stop you? Or worse. You let out a shaky breath "I have to at least try..."

It's been hours and you have yet to find him. And this damn-... Venom is getting hungry 'HUNGRY!' he growls you roll your eyes "ok, ok! Chill the fuck out! I'm looking for someone you can eat" wait... You could just let venom eat now... Spider-punk is more than likely gonna stop you then. No. Not right now... You shake the thought from your head and find a person in an alley way. "'s a kid like you doin' here?" He asked. you let out a shaky breath before speaking "Mask". The single word that has killed so many already.

But like all idiots he just had to ask "w-what are you!?" Venom hums before pulling back to reveal half of your face "we. are. venom" you say in unison before he covers your face again. You welcome the familiar taste of blood in your mouth as venom leaves. 'sorry nibble' he says. He knows you hate seeing your victims face before death. Maybe, just maybe he isn't so bad "it's fine V". Then you heard it. The infamous voice of spider-punk. The blood covering your mouth and some of your shirt didn't help "hey mate. See you got one"

You backed up slightly. Why? You wanted to get rid of him. But he helped you find places to stay and sleep... Maybe.. just maybe you were too harsh? Screw it. "Got one?" You repeat slowly. "Yea. A parasite. Pesky lil tings" you nod slightly. Yes they were pesky. "Yeah well this one's currently being nice and letting me keep my vital organs as long as I feed him. So.. do me a favor and hurry up. Blood doesn't taste too good" he seems surprised at this but doesn't hesitate to move his guitar to his front.

Your ears are ringing and your head is pounding. Venoms screeches of pain covering over your own. When you do finally separate everything hurts. "Fuckin' hell.... Thanks..." You say slowly standing up leaning on the wall. Truth be told he would have taken you home then and there but he couldn't rush his identity being known. He nodded and swung away.

It's been days since the encounter and you've been running from the police. Due to the fact you ran away and killed a few police officers (it was the parasite's fault) you've been running for a while. Venom helped with the police a lot. This time was no different. You've been running for at least 15 minutes and you were running out of breath and your legs were starting to hurt. You were suddenly pulled into an alley way by a stranger. You were fully ready to fight when they spoke "calm down mate".

You sighed "didn't expect t' see you again anytime soon" You say pushing yourself off of him. "I've been lookin' for you. Where you been mate?" "In another dimension glitching out, you?" Hobie chuckles at this thinking you were joking. You weren't but whatever.

You've been staying at Hobies boat house for a while when he suddenly decided to bring you to 'work'. "Why am I here again?" You ask "'s bring your sibling to work day" you roll your eyes. "Hey, this is [name]" he says you glance at the one you already knew. "[Name!?]" He gasped "hi pavitr" "you know each other?" "You thought I was joking when I said I was in another dimension?" You said smirking. You continued to talk to the group before Hobie got called into 'the principles office'. You watched as the platform slowly moved down.

"So... He can build high tech dimension travel devices but he can't make his platform go faster?" You ask bluntly. "Hobie, you can't bring normal people to HQ" you eyed him "i take it back hobie, your boss is a real bitch" you say taking back your statement from earlier. "You said 's take your kid to work day" "for SPIDER kids. Not homeless runaways". Oh. "Tf did you just call me you egotistical, selfish, manipulative, self loathing, bitchy, asshole!?" He seemed shocked. "Listen here and listen good you fuckin' vampire".

You say staring him down "I couldn't care less what you've been through cus 's no fuckin'excuse to take your anger out on others you piece of shit. And if you pull sum stupid shit like this again I will fuckin' declaw you, do it again and I'll defang you too"

Hobie has never been prouder. You guys also stole a fuck ton of shit from Miguel's office.

Idk... Feel like it's a bit.. too much?

[phightingconfessions]

here you go lmao

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GOD banhammer is so fucking perfect, i've been staring at a picture of him in some way shape or form for probably like fifteen hours out of the last three days. he is just so very mwah i wanna bite his armor it looks so fucking cool bro. and his teeth, good LIRD his fucking teeth those chompers are driving me insane. i wanna put my hand in his mouth and i don't think i'd even be upset if he bit me for that, hell i want him to bite me. he could step on me too and pick me up and throw me down the stairs and i wouldn't even be mad. did i mention how fucking tall he is? mans is like 6 foot 11 inches, thats bonkers, he could punt me into the sun and i'd let him. his hands are probably huge as fuck too. i want him to hold me but i'd settle for being manhandled into a jail cell. he probably patrols the cells on occasion since he's just built different and i'd stand in my 'pathetic homosexual loser' cage and give him a gay little wave as he walks past. blow him a kiss and all that. he might not even notice because he's blindfolded which would be saddening but hey maybe i'll get to feel his touch when he drags me off to be executed or whatever. does he even execute his prisoners at all? if he doesn't i guess i will just rot in that cell until he sees fit to release me. bummer. or perhaps i could seduce him into letting me work as an assistant/maid/etc for him instead. he seems like he'd get off on having someone to order around directly, and i wouldn't mind obeying his every command. anyways as much as i'd enjoy letting him order me around it would probably get boring eventually. he'd probably melt immediately if i gave off even a whiff of dominance. mans still listens to his mom for fucks sake, he'll fold like a wet napkin if i yank him down to his knees and grab his chin. that might be tough with the size difference though. i could back him into a corner and grab his horns and pull his face down to mine and then kiss him or whisper to him or whatever. fuck yeah. not to mention he's blindfolded too, so i could mess around with that. he'd probably be kinda mouthy about it, especially if we have a significant strength difference, but he'd like it. putting a hand in his mouth would probably shut him up. god the thought of running my hand along his teeth is just so fucking enthralling. they look kinda similar to shark teeth. built to maul people and yet here i am touching them like the most foolish creature upon god's green earth. cough this is getting a little too immersive whoops fuck uhhh right! his armor. the gems everywhere is attractive. shiny objects are so cool and banhammer has a gem on like every section of his armor. they probably make cuddling a tiny bit uncomfortable but that's par for the course with armor. i'd put up with it. his weapon looks sick as hell too but i am not a weapons connoisseur, i am a men connoisseur. and this one is delicious cough right his armor. his boots look pretty tough. they probably have treads that'd leave a good mark if he stepped on my back. that'd be cool. i'd let him dig his heel into me with great force. god at this point i dont even wanna fuck him i just want to either destroy or be destroyed by this man. good fucking god why did i write so much. *checks wiki* right he has four eyes. assuming they look like his mom's do it'd probably be pretty cute. two little extra ones beside his normal eyes. he probably winks by closing half his eyes. and now i'm thinking of various seductive faces he could make. i am down so bad i can't even. i wanna kiss him choke him slam him into a wall. or have him do that to me. i'm not picky. one of us is gonna be pathetic, obedient, and submissive and i frankly do not give a fuck which one it ends up being. i'd let him put a collar on me. the thought of banhammer wearing a collar is making my brain do terrible horrible things so i will leave it at that. i do draw the line at like 'daddy' shit tho that's not for me at all & he probably has daddy issues anyway

I've read this like 5 times and I have determined. I will post it.

behold: the banhammer manifesto. I don't think it gets crazier than this I think we've reached craziest post about ban on this blog. well done everyone! I'm going to go cry now bye forever /j