#like what a fascinating paragraph Peter

[of-a-toast-and-tea]

"I'm not sneering," retorted Peter indignantly. "I can't imagine why anybody should want to marry my sister, but you're a friend of mine and a damn good sort, and you've my good word for what it's worth. Besides—dash it all, man!—to put it on the lowest grounds, do look what it might have been! A Socialist Conchy of neither bowels nor breeding, or a card-sharping dark horse with a mysterious past! Mother and Jerry must have got to the point when they'd welcome a decent, God-fearing plumber, let alone a policeman. Only thing I'm afraid of is that Mary, havin' such beastly bad taste in blokes, won't know how to appreciate a really decent fellow like you, old son."

-Clouds of Witness, Dorothy L. Sayers

[thegnomelord]

Ohm nom - 🦈 (I have some news, I was doing some research on DnD species and found a humanoid shark species called Sharkin. I though yo! Thats fin-flipin awesome but um there is one paragraph that made me take a backturn. I highlighted the main bits "Sharkin fought with and hunted any sort of creature that looked either powerful or threatening to them, including dinosaurs and dragons, making them top predators inside and outside of water. They are hated by most if not all surface dwelling races, making them enemy number one to almost everyone. They are even hated and despised by dragons, since the first time they killed an adult red dragon. This was not a one time problem, and has caused a bitter rivalry between the Dragons and Sharkins. They favored the taste of dragon flesh, from that day onward it became the largest badge of honor available for a Sharkin to hunt and kill a dragon. This then henceforth became a great and mighty challenge, for a member of the Sharkin royal family to hunt and bag a dragon, the bigger the better. The royal family loved the taste of dragons so much they made it their most favored treat among all other delicacies of their people. They often form hunting parties specifically to hunt and bag a dragon for any special occasion or festival. This made any and all dragon absolutely despise Sharkin, for they looked at them as prey and dragons being the vain creatures they are hate them. A dragon that sees a Sharkin will immediate become enraged and will do whatever it can to kill and devour it." NOW reasonably i was quite frazzled and immedietly though about our lil Shark captain of our lil marine team, thats partnered, HAND in HAND with a Dragon Captain. But then another idea came to me, this Sharkin species, (despite how cool they are and i still love) are built on the sterotype that Shark are horrendous terrifying vicous, agreesive creature. When in reality Sharks are just fish puppies that could murder you if you pissed them off enough. So that got me thinking, what if due to rumours, shark hybrids were thought to be Dangerous and Hazordous species, due to horrendous strerotypes, and a movie, most were meant to be cool, but were misinterpited so badly that people started getting afriad of them and in turn, aggressive towards. This is mainly based on a real thing, Both the author of Jaws, Peter Benchley, and the director, Steven Spielberg, regret the negative impact the film had on shark populations and the perpetuation of shark stereotypes. So people think that the captains would naturally butt heads, due to sterotypes and rumours that nearly brought the two species to war. (Which was luckily debunked way before anything got violent and now both species are currently fighting against anything harmful towards the other. Creating the oddest but oddly wholesome cross-species relationships. ) Only to find out the two are bound by the hip. waz your take? *Administer Foreheads Kisses*)

Oh yeah, I know the jaws effect lol It's fascinating how fiction can influence reality and reality can influence fiction, sorry this took so long and is so rough, but I got hit with the InspirationTM in the middle of the night lol.

CW:SFW, Price x male reader, monster au,

------------------------------

At first sight, the feelings you and the good captain had for each other could be considered tense professionalism at best and disdain at worst. It isn't a surprise why that is; the hate and suspicion running between your species is old and deep like the trenches. Dragons hardly want to be a shark's dinner, and a shark would rather not become soup.

Still, the peace between your species held, and so did the tense relationship between you two. To the others it looked like you never agreed; they've lost count how many times you and Price had spent hours arguing over battle plans. How you two would release all the anger you had in the ring, so much so you had to spar outside because the military didn't have the funds to fix the ring after every match. How you would bare your teeth and Price would snarl and growl at you at every little argument, thinly veiled insults flying like bullets out of your mouths.

What they didn't know was how softly Price would purr when you two laid in bed, how gently his claws traced your shark hide along your torso. Sprawled out over your chest like you're his mountain of golden coins, more a cat than a dragon really, Price is the picture perfect example of bliss.

"Comfortable huh?" You hum, carding your clawed fingers through his hair, taking the time to scratch around the base of his horns.

"Mhm," He hums, content blue eyes closing as he leans into your touch. "Finally a moment to ourselves." Price chuckles, nuzzling his head into your neck. He breathes in your scent with a happy sigh, sharp fangs nibbling on your throat, the comforting scent calming his mind.

"Uhuh," You chuckle in turn, "The boys sure know how to keep us on our toes." You grin and your hand slides down from his head to his back, even gentler there as you trace the scar where his wing used to be. His remaining wing stretches out, weakly shaking as if trying to stretch, before it falls back down to lay on the bed and hang off it.

Price shivers, a low sound rumbling from his chest. "Can't leave those muppets alone for a moment." He huffs. "Did you see MacTavish? The lad nearly lost his tail because of his toy." A soft growl slips past his lips, neither of you had been pleased when Soap's tail got caught on fire thanks to his explosive he swore was 'safe'. Price's tail curls around yours, and though your tail is too rigid to do the same, he can still feel you reciprocate in the way your tail tip wags like a dog's.

"He's your problem in the morning." Your words earn you a sharp nip at your throat, more of an admonishment than an actual threat. "Ow." You say, in revenge pinching his pudgy side.

"You deserve it." Price laughs, forked tongue licking up the stray drops of blood that leak down from where his teeth had cut your skin. Placing a hand on your chest Price rises just enough to catch your lips in a slow kiss. You can taste your blood on his tongue, along with cigar smoke and something inherently draconic that makes your mouth water for a bite of his flesh.

But his kisses are enough to quench your hunger, gun calloused hands holding your head still so he can pepper kisses along your brows and down your nose, on each cheek and down your jaw. There's no need to rush when the night is dark and the sun isn't ready to rise yet.

It's peaceful.

The door slams open, light and voices flooding in "Captains we need-" Johnny's voice pitters off as he takes in the sight, bright eyes glowing in the darkness "-you..."

Not so peaceful.

[thesymphonytrue]

Hiiiiii I just have to ask if you have any Neal/Peter fic recs? On or off ao3, I'm just really craving some good sweet stories w them 😩

Hiiii!!!!

oooooo yesssss!!! Here are a few that I love:

a particular type of hat by natlet

I am obsessed with this fic. The writing style and language is sooo beautiful. GAH 😭 It's written with quite a few time jumps...so for me I had to take it slow and really enjoy and savor the fic. I mean just read this:

It's the first chance he's had to look at Neal, slow down and really look at him, and he's so - Peter can't find the words for it. Neal looks like a fascinating new case, like Mozzie's car, like the sun setting behind home plate. He looks like something Peter wants to get his hands on. His hair is longer, bleached light by the sun and curling in the sea air, and Peter wants to reach out, brush it back off his forehead, run his thumb along the line of stubble hugging Neal's jaw.

UGH gorgeous!!! I love this paragraph so much and the entire fic is written like this, so soft and beautiful.

this body is yours (your mess is mine) by multifandomjess

This is another fic I have read over and over. It's so well done and "fixes" that season five argument we all cry over ��

an excerpt:

Peter is still against him, and for a moment Neal is worried that he’s misread everything and made a terrible mistake. But then, Peter makes a tiny, wanting sound and his eyelids are fluttering closed as his lips part beneath Neal’s. Neal smiles into the kiss, his heart racing as he threads his fingers through the short hair at the nape of Peter’s neck. His tongue sweeps along the seam of Peter’s lips to tangle with Peter’s, and they’re kissing, and kissing, and kissing.

T^T it's so soft. and I love it.

Cleaning Out the Wound by melenafrey

More Cape Verde goodness because god those episodes were romantic!! This one features protective Mozzie. 😂

 “Don’t you get what I’m trying to say here?" He closed his eyes and let his head fall forward the short distance to rest against Neal’s. He heard Neal’s surprised intake of breath, and then nothing. Neal stayed, and Peter could feel the weight of his heavy head as he relaxed into the touch.

MY HEART 😭

Company Picnic by laulan

This one is just short and literally sweet and SO them.

Then Neal catches Peter's wrist in his hand and brushes his lips over the pad of Peter's thumb, his eyes warm and devilish. Peter jumps, giving Neal a stern look and pushing down the lingering thought that he should go for it anyway, damn whoever's looking.

lol Neal literally is just tempting Peter this entire fic and it's adorable.

Awakening by Sulwen

haha can you tell I like Cape Verde fics? This one is really good. Very true to their characters.

“This wasn't supposed to be a chase!”

There's a long pause before Peter speaks again. “Tell me, then, Neal. What was it?”

Neal bows his head and stares at the floor, long enough for Peter to step forward again and reach out a tentative hand. He takes a deep breath. This isn't going to help. If anything, it's going to pull Peter in deeper, make him that much more determined. But he's talked himself into a corner, and he can't find a way to slip it. The only way out is through.

THAT DIALOGUE THO!!!

Undeniable by cookiegirl

This one is just cozy and soft and sweet and set in Copenhagen so what is not to like? It's like being wrapped in a warm hug!

Everything would be easier, Peter thinks, if Copenhagen wasn’t so damn romantic. He’s not usually one to notice things like that, but even he can’t miss the way that the October late-afternoon sun turns the water in Nyhavn harbor golden, and deepens the burnt orange and burnished yellow shades of the townhouses. Tourist couples stroll past, hand in hand, or sit close together at the outdoor tables of the tiny canalside cafes, and the air swirls with happy chatter and the strains of restaurant music. It is undeniably idyllic, and it’s making Peter’s skin itch.

Things would also be easier, of course, if Neal wasn’t so damn… Neal.

heeeheee!!!! so cute!!!

Five Kisses That Never Happened by china_shop

Just check out all of china_shop's stuff. I love their Peter/Neal fics and this one is pure fluff and warm feelings.

"Shut up," says Neal and leans into him, kisses him softly, over and over like he'll never get enough.

~~~~~~~

Okay those are my top favorites, but I think I have some more on my bookmarks on AO3 I think, so feel free to check them out. I don't usually recommend my own fics, but if you haven't read them I have a few fluffy Peter/Neal fics as well that I can share here if needed! <3 <3 <3 I hope this helps!! Thanks for the ask! I love talking fanfic!! :D

[superfallingstars]

Hey, for the playlist ask thingy, what about:

What Peter would listen to

Remus trying to find a job

What you think the weird sisters would sound like if they existed

send me a playlist prompt!

Omg sorry it took me a billion years to get to this. The problem with making playlists is that there is basically an infinite number of songs in the world and I'm always like, well maybe there's a better song out there that I haven't heard yet and I should listen to just one more song/album/artist/etc. But that's the devil speaking. Anyway these prompts were so fun and I really really enjoyed them :-) also I wrote SO much

First up is Peter! I already have a Peter playlist (it's kinda on the silly side, aka it's rat-themed), but for this, I tried to focus more on what he would listen to, rather than songs that describe him (or rats). Since Peter is evidently very impressed by showy, tasteless displays of masculinity (aka James and Sirius), I imagined he would listen to – PROGRESSIVE ROCK! Prog rock at its best is like, really incredible musicianship and composition, and if you can buy into the drama it can be really good. But at its worst, it's just tasteless and pretentious and you're like, wow these musicians are so far up their own asses that they can't even tell that their extremely technically impressive guitar solo sounds like garbage, and also did they even listen to these lyrics, cuz they suck. And I went for specifically, like, late-70s-early-80s prog rock, when it started to get really overproduced and bad. Sorry I just kind of reamed prog rock in this paragraph I swear I legitimately like it… You can only hate something this much if you're intimately familiar with it. I should also note that I chose some of these songs for their lyrics ("The Logical Song" and "The Very Last Time" both are REALLY great songs for Peter's personality and friendship with James, respectively) and some of them are even good. They're not all bad. But they're mostly bad. Anyway! Please enjoy my garbage! 

Track list:

Supertramp - The Logical Song: "The questions run too deep / For such a simple man / Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned / I know it sounds absurd / Please tell me who I aaaam!!!"

Utopia - The Very Last Time: I love you Todd Rundgren. "Nobody sees how you treat me like dirt / Nobody knows just how badly a man can hurt [....] It's the very last time you will get on my case / It's the very last time 'cause I won't be a fool no more!"

Yes - Roundabout: this song is literally good

Rush - New World Man: man I hate Rush. But this is rather tolerable. "He's old enough to know what's right / But young enough not to choose it / He's noble enough to win the world / But weak enough to lose it / He's a new world man"

Yes - Parallels: sucks

Kansas - Point of Know Return: sucks

Asia - Heat of the Moment: sucks but it's a classic

Yes - Leave It: sucks even more than the last Yes song, which is really saying something

Electric Light Orchestra - The Way Life's Meant to Be: We're ending on a good note imo. They don't make concept albums about time travel like they used to! But really I put this on here because it made me giggle. "...I wish I was back in 1981 / Just to see your face instead of this place / Now I know what you mean to me / Ooh, and I wonder, yes I wonder / Is this the way life's meant to be?" lol. lmao even

Ok onto music that is good!

Next prompt was Remus trying to find a job! Gah I adored this prompt! That being said I kind of just made the saddest playlist ever LOL. I'm really fascinated by the time in Remus's life between the Potters' deaths and his employment at Hogwarts. Wtf did he do all those years? How did he get by? Since this playlist is about that time in his life, it's full of songs about the meaninglessness of life and just generally feeling lonely and empty and disconnected. And also working. FUN. Again I admittedly poached a lot of songs on here from my (very bloated and unfinished) Remus playlist. As far as genre goes, I like the idea of Remus having a pretty eclectic taste. But I tend to lean towards things that are lo-fi, scrappy, and less polished, as well as things that are a little jangly or jazzy (basically what I'm saying is that The Cleaners from Venus are theeee Remus band of all time). I'm going to try to restrain myself with the commentary this time

Track list:

Yo La Tengo - Everyday: One of the most depressing songs of all time imo. "Looking to forget tomorrow, looking everyday." Yeowch!

The Cleaners from Venus - Wivenhoe Bells (II): Like I said the Remus band of all time to me. Jangly, jazzy, lo-fi, + incredibly catchy songs about everyday English life

Even As We Speak - Nothing Ever Happens

Fleet Foxes - Helplessness Blues

Pavement - Here: "I was dressed for success / But success, it never comes" 👍

The Smiths - Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now: obviously

Nick Drake - Been Smoking Too Long

Galaxie 500 - Cold Night

The Dismemberment Plan - Come Home: The more I listen to these guys, the more I'm convinced that they're one of the best bands ever, as well as being the rare math rock band with good lyrics. Very literary.

Mount Eerie - Moon, I Already Know: I can recite this whole thing like some devastating prayer. Remus song of all time. Moon, I already know I'm small on the ground I roll around and feel menacing mountains And all depths of sorrow dwarf me All towering terrors are mine to cower below I know, I know, I know already So don't look at me like that and then Duck behind clouds I know I'm small and that I have no idea I know, I know, I know Let me be dumb again Let food drip off my chin Let me think you're a light Please please let me sleep through the night unknowing Let me close eyes. Ok I'm gonna throw up and die

Ok this was probably the most difficult prompt for me – I really had no idea what The Weird Sisters would sound like. But if there's any area of music that I'm familiar with, it's mediocre 90s alternative rock, so let's get to it. In the movie, The Weird Sisters are made up of members of Pulp (hi, Jarvis Cocker) and Radiohead, so I decided to start there. And I think Britpop is a natural place to start for a UK band that was big in the 90s. But I wasn't really feeling it with the usual culprits – Pulp was too sweeping and dramatic... I thought Oasis would be more "rock," but frankly, they were just too annoying. I wanted something a little more power pop (a genre that I can only describe as sounding like Disney TV show theme songs. Or, like, Stacy's Mom). And while tapping through related artists for small Britpop bands I've never heard of, I came across the song "1 Time, 2 Times Devastated," and I was like – THIS IS IT. Exactly the kind of mediocre 90s rock/power pop that I was looking for. (Also sorry that I keep saying mediocre I just can't imagine that The Weird Sisters are very good LMFAO! Idk wizards have not convinced me that they have a cool youth culture! Sorry bout it!) Other than that, I thought "Girl From Mars" by Ash was also a good fit. The rest of the playlist is mostly early Radiohead songs (they've got that Britpop feel, but they're a little messier and unpolished. And solidly mediocre) and the more up-tempo Supergrass songs (there's this sort of bouncy piano + drum thing they do that I quite like).

Track list:

DM3 - 1 Time, 2 Times Devastated

Ash - Girl from Mars

Radiohead - Just

Cud - Robinson Crusoe

Supergrass - Tonight

Radiohead - Anyone Can Play Guitar

Supergrass - Moving

The Stems - At First Sight

Radiohead - Thinking About You

Supergrass - Richard III

Anyway this was probably more specific than anyone would ever want but idk man. What I lack in media taste (what with my enjoyment of Harry Potter and other mediocre children's media) I make up for in, um, media taste (pretentious music nerd).

Thank you so much for the ask. Please send me more music asks I beg. There's like a 20 business day turnaround but like, I love making playlists, and getting to infodump about music is literally my dream. I hope you enjoy the playlists :-)

[fatehbaz]

The “goal of civilization” should be to get these delicious tropical pineapples shipped up to kitchen tables in St. Petersburg.

Much to consider here.

---

Anton Chekhov, it appears, was not the first Russian literary luminary to visit Hong Kong. Chekhov had stopped off in October 1890 and wrote about its “wonderful bay”. [...] But Chekhov was beaten to the punch by Ivan Goncharov who stopped by in 1853. Goncharov is now best now known for his novel Oblamov, but his bestseller at the time was a 700-page tome of travel-writing called The Frigate Pallada. Goncharov had been taken, as a sort of official scribe, on the Russian naval expedition sent to “open Japan”. If that sounds like American Commodore Matthew Perry’s expedition, it very much was: the Pallada arrived in Japan several weeks after Perry. The Pallada [...] went [...] via the Cape of Good Hope, Java, Singapore, Hong Kong and Shanghai, with side-trips to Manila, Korea and the Ryukyus. [...] Edyta M Bojanowska relates all this, and much more [in her book] [...]. Bojanowska uses Goncharov’s travelogue as a window on Russia, a window through which to view the European, and particularly British, imperial project [...].

---

Russia’s Pacific history is little known, perhaps even in Russia. [...]

In the library [...], I once came across a book entitled La Frontera ruso-mexicana: “The Russian-Mexican Border”. There actually was one in what is now California in the first part of the 1800s. Nikolai Rezanov had tried to open Japan in 1804; he got nowhere. (He did however continue on to North America and all the way down to San Francisco where he got engaged to Conchita, the [...] daughter of the Spanish governor, a story which became a late Soviet-era rock opera.)

---

Alaska ended up being sold to the United States a decade or so after Goncharov’s voyage. [...] Goncharov’s [book] [...] “strains to project an image of Russia as a confident and competent peer of European colonial empires.” [...] Goncharov was a product of his age. He was furthermore an anglophile and thought that the British had on the whole the right ideas about empire. (He did however find their ubiquity annoying: his idyll on Madeira is ruined by seeing so many of them. “They’re here too?” he wrote.) He would occasionally take the imperialists to task for some particularly egregious injustice, but he never questioned the enterprise. He just thought Russia should have a piece of the action.

---

Goncharov settled on Korea as a good potential target for Russia (“Goncharov Island” is now known as Mayang-do Island, the site of a North Korean missile base) [...]. The book hit the ground running, went through ten editions by the end of  the century, and seems never really to have been out of print [...]. Singapore gets a slightly fuller treatment. Goncharov marvels at the pineapples piled up “like turnips”. “The goal of civilization,” Bojanowska quotes him, is to get these pineapples up to St Petersburg where they were currently unheard of luxury items. (Goncharov’s equating of capitalism with tropical fruit is reminiscent of the [...] [twentieth-century] fascination with bananas.)

---

Text by: Peter Gordon. A book review published under the title '“A World of Empires: The Russian Voyage of the Frigate Pallada” by Edyta M Bojanowska'. Published online in the Essays, Non-Fiction, and Reviews sections of Asian Review of Books. 10 July 2018. [Bold emphasis and some paragraph breaks/contractions added by me. Italicized first lines in this post added by me.]

[alwayschasingrainbows]

Tangled Web by L. M. Montgomery chapter 1 part 1 (my commentary).

Disclaimer: this post does not contain Tangled Web's spoilers, but there are several references to other LMM's books; The Blue Castle, Emily of New Moon, Anne of Green Gables, Jane of Lantern Hill, Marigold. I tried to keep it spoiler-free (but there are some minor spoilers for Emily and The Blue Castle), so just in case - all references to other novels are written in a blue colour!

Commentary:

The first sentence is so fascinating! It indicates that there are many mysteries and rumors associated with Aunt Becky's jug, which we are yet to discover. I love how Montgomery tells us that "this story is true" - it makes a reader feel important, as if they had been appointed to become a guardian of the most important family's secrets to which only a select few were allowed.

It is worth noting that family heirlooms (which jug seems to be) have always been an important aspect of Montgomery's books (A Lost Diamond in Emily's series, Marilla's amethyst brooch, Anne's porcelain dogs: Gog and Magog). We don't know a thing about the jug yet - whether it is beautiful or ugly, old or new, in a perfect condition or badly damaged. We don't know the stories associated with the jug, nor its origins. Yet, we realize that the jug will be the axis of this story.

Montgomery, as always, manages to interest the reader in a few short sentences, while at the same time introducing us to some characters. The above-mentioned characters (named Peter Penhallow, Big Sam Dark, Dandy Dark and Penny Dark) seem to be mere actors in this comedy-drama, whose epicenter is the jug. The allusions are delightful: "Peter Penhallow might to-day have been photographing lions alone in African jungles, and Big Sam Dark would, in all probability, never have learned to appreciate the beauty of the unclothed female form". A pure genius!!!

It's fascinating that sometimes the smallest objects can change a person's entire life, as was the case with Aunt Becky's jug. The object is therefore a symbol; just as in The Blue Castle, a rose bush symbolizes new life, freedom and happiness, just as in Emily's Quest The Lost Diamond became a symbol of creativity and literary success. What will it symbolize? According to the short description we are given in this paragraph; a change.

I love the idea of a novel, centred around a big family. Family bonds are incredibly important in Montgomery's novels: sometimes they are freeing (as was the case with Anne), sometimes they teach one about life (as was in Emily's case), sometimes they make it impossible to be oneselves (as was in Valancy's and partly, Jane's cases).

The family in The Tangled Web seems interesting from the very beginning. The idea of marrying only close relations seems... concerning, by today's standards. In real life, children, born to closely related parents, are more prone to suffer from the health-issues (we'll see if that is the case in the novel, too).

On the other hand, the marriage between first cousins may not have seemed too concerning in these times. It occurs in other Montgomery's novels, too (for example, The Murrays trying to marry a seventeen year old Emily Starr to her cousin, Andrew Murray).

I absolutely adore the idea of Aunt Becky being the head of the clan! In some respects, Montgomery really was ahead of the times in which she had lived. She created many strong, determined female characters, who ruled the family (Aunt Elizabeth, Rachel Lynde, Jane's and Marigold's grandmothers, Miss Cornelia Bryant, or even Marilla).

Aunt Becky's "honesty" reminded me a bit about Valancy's Aunt Isabel ("Aunt Isabel prided herself on saying what she thought, but didn’t like it so well when other people said what they thought to her".)

Aunt Becky seems to be a fascinating character! I really enjoy her "I am throwing a pre-funeral party, but if you want to eat anything, bring your own food, I am not going to bother about this on my death-bed" or "Please don't pretend to cry over my death" vibes. What a lady!!!

Also, there is something in Aunt Becky that reminds me of Mr. Carpenter's words: "Somehow—one needs—a spice—of evil—in every personality. It's the—pinch of—salt—that brings out—the flavour."

I love the idea of Aunt Becky's "levees"!

Uncle Pippin reminds me a little about Valancy's Uncle Benjamin (although he doesn't crack any bad jokes yet). We shall see what he turns out to be. The allusion to the uncertain history of his conception seems very interesting, too. Quite risky for a Montgomery's work, I would say!

"I've a hunch that the old lady is going to start something," said Uncle Pippin to his white nag." - me too, dear Uncle Pippin, me too.

And I can't wait for this!!!!

[darchildre]

Gentlemen and Players

(Got distracted and so didn't get to part 1 before part 2 arrived, so I am posting about both parts at once.)

Hey everybody, get excited - it's cricket time! Everything I know about cricket, I learned from E W Hornung and Dorothy Sayers. Here is the sum total of my cricket knowledge: Raffles and Lord Peter are Good At It. That's it; that's all I've got.

Thing 1:

"Cricket," said Raffles, "like everything else, is good enough sport until you discover a better. As a source of excitement it isn't in it with other things you wot of, Bunny, and the involuntary comparison becomes a bore. What's the satisfaction of taking a man's wicket when you want his spoons?

The line about the spoons is so funny to me. I realize that fancy flatware is worth stealing and fencing or whatever but it's still so funny.

Being a gentleman thief who steals jewelry: daring, classy, dare I say, 'sexy'.

Being a gentleman thief who steals spoons: just the silliest thing.

Also very funny is Raffles pouting in his terrible straw hat about the cricket not going his way not five paragraphs after saying he doesn't care at all about it. Thank god someone properly illustrated this ridiculous moment.

Thing 2: "A young gentleman of the exquisite type," huh, Bunny? Bunny my Bunny, no matter how hard you try, you are not good at pretending to be straight.

Thing 3: Oh, poor Bunny, who is now more worried about being humiliated on the cricket field than he is about committing a crime. Let's be real - I too would much rather rob someone than be watched while miserably (and inevitably) failing at a sporting event. Bunny's a better man than I, because I would probably have faked a dire illness or an overseas trip or something to get out of playing sports in front of people, no matter how in love with Raffles I was.

Thing 4: Raffles' weird moral/ethical code is so fascinating. It would be the height of rudeness to rob one's host. But if you're invited somewhere solely because you're good at cricket, then you're practically being treated as an employee which a) is an insult and b) makes you not really a guest. And therefore it's not only acceptable (if still a bit tacky) but almost compulsory to rob said host, as revenge for the insult he's given you.

Thing 5: Aww, Bunny has decided this time not to get cranky that Raffles isn't telling him things, after Raffles rescued him last time! Very cute - let's see how long that resolution lasts.

Also extremely cute is Raffles' little training regimen of fishing and impromptu games of catch. One hopes they alleviate Bunny's anxiety about sports at least a little.

Thing 6:

...we found an enormous house-party assembled, including more persons of pomp, majesty, and dominion than I had ever encountered in one room before. I confess I felt overpowered. Our errand and my own presences combined to rob me of an address upon which I have sometimes plumed myself...

Because we only ever see Bunny with Raffles and therefore almost always at some point in the commission of a crime, we always see Bunny rattled and anxious, rather than in his element. It's interesting to imagine Bunny at his ease, who is apparently charming, personable and fun at parties. Probably, were he not worried about the police, he and Miss Melhuish might have ended up having a lot of fun gossiping about everyone else at the party. Miss Melhuish is clearly having a lot of fun imagining burglars with him and thinking about whose jewelry she would steal if she had the chance.

Also, the hilarious fear-inspired arrogance of thinking that he and Raffles are "two well-known London thieves" the presence of whom the police might have been alerted to! You have pulled at most three* whole jobs together, Bunny, and haven't run into the police on any of them. You are, as yet, the opposite of "well-known thieves". Literally no one knows about you.

Thing 7: Raffles taking his shoes off so that he can pace properly without bothering other people in the house and worrying (if only a little) if smoking inside is allowed is very cute. I love how excited he gets at the idea of both observing some 'professional' criminals and also beating both them and the police.

Also very cute is Bunny replying to his "My dear Bunny" with his own "My dear A.J.", the very first time we've seen Bunny call him that.

Thing 8:

I had still enough of the honest man in me to welcome the postponement of our actual felonies, to dread their performance, to deplore their necessity: which is merely another way of stating the too patent fact that I was an incomparably weaker man than Raffles, while every whit as wicked. I had, however, one rather strong point. I possessed the gift of dismissing unpleasant considerations, not intimately connected with the passing moment, entirely from my mind. Through the exercise of this faculty I had lately been living my frivolous life in town with as much ignoble enjoyment as I had derived from it the year before; and similarly, here at Milchester, in the long-dreaded cricket-week, I had after all a quite excellent time.

A) The idea that it would be a better and almost more noble thing to actually fully commit to being a criminal rather than the wishy-washy state that Bunny currently finds himself in is going to come up more prominently in later stories, but it's interesting that Bunny is already thinking about it, at least a little.

B) Except that we are talking about Bunny 'my greatest strength is not thinking about stuff I find unpleasant until I absolutely have to' Manders, so no conclusions will be reached at this time.

Thing 9: Awww, Bunny actually does all right at cricket! Good for him. I like that he and Miss Melhuish are continuing to be house-party friends as well and that she "said pretty things to [him]" about the cricket. (Sorry, miss, he's very cute but also very taken.)

Thing 10: Awww part 2, Bunny hearing Mackenzie grabbing someone in the hallway in the middle of the night, clearly thinking it's Raffles who's been caught, and flinging the door open to valiantly rush to the rescue! I mean, it isn't Raffles needing rescuing at all, but by god, he tried. Don't worry, Bunny - someday you will actually manage to heroically come to Raffles' rescue, I promise.

And also we get our first example of Bunny being surprisingly effective at unarmed melee combat but only when he's startled/panicking.

Thing 11: And then, our first properly happy ending, where everyone gets what they wanted: Bunny gets to feel a little heroic and like he's done something good, and Raffles gets to feel clever and to walk off with the best of the shiny things, and they both presumably get enough money to continue not having real jobs. Applause all round!

Thing 12: Raffles did not in any way need Bunny for this job. He does nothing to facilitate the robbery and any help he provides in distracting or hindering the professional criminals is purely coincidental and could have been expected of any of the other members of the house party. Bunny is not useful and it is, in fact, more work to get him to the house: Raffles has to lie to his host about Bunny's cricket skills and then scurry off to clandestinely play catch with him to get him even close to faking it.

Raffles just prefers having Bunny around, is the thing. If there's a chance of something fun/exciting happening, Bunny should be around for it. And if the party turns out to be boring and there's no opportunity for crime, at least Bunny will be there to hang out with.

It's easier to tell that Bunny is smitten, because he tells us all the time, but Raffles is totally head over heels for his rabbit as well. He's just slightly subtler about it because he's not the narrator.

Both Raffles movies from the 1930s are based loosely on this story (and its sequel, "The Return Match"). I cannot in fairness recommend either of them as good adaptations - they are both so straight that they feel they have to give Raffles a girlfriend - but the 1930 version is at least kinda fun, and Bunny gets to tackle a dude in his pajamas.** The 1939 version is a remake starring David Niven and Olivia de Havilland and I love both of them but it has been hit super hard by the Hays Code - barely has a Bunny at all, and Raffles has to turn himself in at the end, because the Code didn't allow people to be shown profiting from a crime. It's a bit depressing, really.

They're not terrible movies and are a bit worth seeing as curiosities if nothing else, but maybe just watch the 1970s tv show instead.

*Depending on where you think "Out of Paradise" fits in the chronology.

**How the dude got into Bunny's pajamas, I'll never know. /Groucho Marx impression

[mikerickson]

Mid-Year Book Freak Out 2023

Best book you've read so far: Annihilation - Jeff Vandermeer I’d seen the movie back when it came out in 2018 and expected more or less the same story beats, but the book really did it’s own thing. Extremely atmospheric, lonely, and strange in a way I’d never read before, but it absolutely worked for me.

Best sequel of 2023 so far: Authority - Jeff Vandermeer I told myself I’d read at least one trilogy this year (I typically stay away from series), and I went with the Southern Reach Trilogy. This book was such a narrative whiplash from Annihilation that at parts it didn’t even feel like it was the same author.

New release you haven't read yet, but want to: Vampires of El Norte - Isabel Cañas I really enjoyed her first novel, The Hacienda, and this one seems vaguely similar, which is exactly what I’d be looking for anyway.

Most anticipated release of the second half of 2023: I’m not super in-tune with book releases, and I still have a massive backlog to work through anyway.

Biggest disappointment of 2023: The Croning - Laird Barron I really enjoyed a short story collection by this same author and a lot of other reviewers I typically trust recommended this one, but this one-off novel was so bad that I was actually confused as to what I missed after finishing it.

Biggest surprise: The Holdout - Graham Moore A courtroom thriller is pretty far from my normal fare, and I don’t remember why I originally bought this book, but it had some good twists and turns that had me saying, “holy shit” out loud.

Favorite new author (debut or new to you): Christopher Bollen Pretty much every paragraph of A Beautiful Crime was edited and stylized in a way that felt like it was tailored to me specifically. There’s nothing about neither the prose nor the dialogue I would change.

Newest fictional crush: The burly oil rig worker in Jeff Vandermeer’s Acceptance that was secretly banging the town’s lighthouse keeper.

Newest favorite character: Listen, I know it’s coming up a lot on this list, but The Biologist from Annihilation was a fascinating protagonist to follow because she was simply too autistic to notice how terrifying her surroundings were.

Book that made you cry: Lone Stars - Justin Deabler A multi-generational drama that missed the mark for me personally, but the way society/the other characters treated the central matriarch made me really feel for her.

Book that made you happy: The Mysterious Affair at Styles - Agatha Christie I picked this up immediately after watching Glass Onion, and it was exactly what I was looking for.

Favorite book to movie adaptation of 2023 you've seen: N/A

Favorite post/review you've written this year: I went in on Peter Straub’s Ghost Story

Most beautiful book you bought or received this year: Like aesthetically? I really liked the cover of Even Though I Knew the End by C. L. Polk

Books you need to read by the end of this year: I told myself I’d finally get around to reading The Terror by Dan Simmons, but I haven’t bought a copy yet.

[queer-and-dear-books]

Title: Someday

Author: David Levithan

Genre: YA Fiction | Romance | Friendship | Fantasy | LGBTQ+

Content Warnings: Bullying | Physical Violence

Overall Rating: 9.9/10

Personal Opinion: The plot is honestly nothing remarkable but that’s kind of why I love it. I love slice of life and seeing the world through A’s lens, hopping from body to body every day, that’s slices of many lives. But what’s great about this sequel to Everyday is that we get to see others like A too. How do they cope? What questions do they have? How do they live their unusual life? It’s truly fascinating. 

Do I Own This Book? No but it’s on my wish list.

Spoilers Below For My Likes & Dislikes:

Likes:

- I’m going to start with the part that made me the most giddy. Aemon and Liam. Oh my god. They are both entities like A, changing bodies every day. By sheer chance, they met at a book festival and fell for each other. Neither of them thought they could ever have more than words on a screen until Liam finally stopped being a coward (his words) and went to see Aemon/Peter anyway. And boom! They now know each other for real. Oh my god, when I read that part, I about exploded with excitement because it was such a plot twist. And it wasn’t even part of the main plot. It was like a 6 page intermission at best. But I just love love and I love that these two found each other.

- Okay, on to the main plot. It’s honestly nothing remarkable and that’s kind of why I love it. The thing that drew me to Everyday was the fact that it was slices of many lives. The simple, the complicated, the happy, the sad, the good, the bad. A has to live those lives and they did it alone. After sharing parts of themself with Rhiannon, they were not used to being alone again. I felt their heartbreak but I also felt the bits of the people that they embodied. It created this lens that was so unique to reading this book and I was just so enraptured.

- It was also so interesting to see A living the lives of people who are neurodivergent. Of course, I mean, Alvin. Clearly, something is going on with his brain because he was all over the place. There were two pages that had zero indents. It was just one long paragraph crammed into the pages. It was fascinating. And I understood the purpose it had served in the story. It was the story’s way of reminding the reader why A and Rhiannon couldn’t work. Because A had no idea who they would wake up as and what they would be experiencing. Some simply don’t have access to the internet. Others go through a crisis and need  help. It is impossible for A and Rhiannon to always be together because there’s no telling what sort of obstacles an individual’s life will present.

- I know A feels like they fucked up Moses Cheng’s life but I would argue that they helped Moses. First of all, his bullies were clearly racist and therefore deserve to have charges pressed against them for hurting Moses. Second of all, A was right to confess everything that had happened to Moses to the adults. It was the right thing to do and I think it will serve Moses well in the long run. I just hope Moses finds good friends to help him get through life in the future.

- I fucking hate X, oh my god. He (potentially) ruined Pat’s life. He killed Reverend Poole. He kidnapped Wyatt. He beat the shit out of Nathan. But my god, what a wild ride seeing the opposite of A at work. He is evil personified, abusing his power to ruin lives and harm innocent people while avoiding the consequences. But the crazy part is that he’s not wrong about some of his points. I mean, redistributing the wealth to the poor? That’s iconic. He still sucks ass for his violent tendencies though. Of course he identifies as a man too. It’s just like Amanita’s dads said in Sense8, “It’s always a man.” “Violence has a gender.”

- But yeah, glimpsing other entities like A at work was just so fascinating. People like that 98 year old lady who passed away uses God to cope with their waking up every day in a different body. People like Dawn who go to the MET every day and sit in front of the same painting for a constant. People like Helmut who have stayed in the same body for forty years because he wanted to stay. People like Morris who still don't understand how they work yet. It’s amazing seeing them exist because A and X aren’t the only ones. There’s more than just two ways to exist as them. And also A got to meet M on an online chat forum and therefore, neither of them are alone anymore. That makes me so happy too.

- I was worried that Alexander would be heartbroken by the end of this book but he and Rhiannon are still somewhat together. They have something and it’s theirs and it’s implied that Alexander learns about A too. And that makes me happy too. Plus, we also have Nathan and Wyatt starting their own support group of two to cope with being possessed. That makes me happy too. The fact that characters don’t have to be alone with their traumatic experiences makes me happy.

Dislikes:

- As I said, fuck X. I just wish we knew what happened with Pat. I hope he doesn’t remember all the shitty stuff. It’s also implied that he’s gay. And I hate that X used Pat’s body to have sex with a woman. And then treated that woman like trash. Oh my god, I hate X. He ruined another life too! That college guy who had a girlfriend! Oh my god, I hope they’re okay. God, seriously, fuck X. He acts like he’s a gift for “restraining” himself from doing worse things. The things you do are still pretty bad you sicko. 

- That’s pretty much it, I hate X. I hate that he ruined lives. I understand why A feels conflicted about disposing of him but the world is better off without him. That’s it.

[beautifulbuckys]

Speakeasy (Steve Rogers x Reader)

“I’m not villainizing your peers because they like to get drunk on the weekend, Mr. Rogers, I’m villainizing you and your peers because you use illegal practices to keep yourself in business.

“You better chose your next few words very carefully, sweets,” 

Summary: When Tony Stark insists on hosting a themed party, you find yourself in the shoes of a 1920′s role with all the other Avengers. But what happens when you spot the Avenger you’d been harboring a crush on?

Warnings: Some swearing, intense conversations, some sexual moments but nothing smutty (just spicy!) 

A/N: I refuse to write and read mafia fics, but I still somehow came up with this. Enjoy!

Tony Stark lived for dramatics. 

Nobody who’s been in a 5-mile radius of the man is surprised. The list goes on with his over-the-top Iron Man suits, excentric galas, and Avengers-themed Pop-Tarts hitting the shelves. The Stark parties hosted what felt like every other week topped the list. More than once, without fail, he found an excuse to host parties. Infiltrated a Hydra base? It sounds like a party needs to be hosted! Bucky’s 106th birthday? The balloons are already inflated! Did Peter get an A on his AP Lang test? A cake has already been ordered. 

Tony’s newest fascination has been themed parties. He’s only hosted one, yet it managed to be more extreme than Morgan’s last birthday party; you could’ve sworn you saw a real unicorn. As he put it, the theme was ‘Football’ themed, hosted in a timely fashion for the Super Bowl. It was the grandest Super Bowl party you’d ever attended. Tony insisted everyone wore team colors, much to many people’s dismay. Although it may come as a shock, Bruce and Peter weren’t the most enthused to attend a party about football. 

Now, as the summer is winding down, he is planning another. The theme, you ask? He proudly announced it to be Roarin’ 20’s! 

“Ladies and gents, I know you’re all so excited! I can see the passion behind Bucky’s cold, dead eyes!” Tony announced in front of the team. You were all seated around the orange curved couch Pepper purchased for the compound, 

The silence amongst the team spoke volumes. 

“I’m gonna vamp it up a bit! By tonight, Morgan should have dropped off individual letters to each of your rooms. You have 1 week to read the said letter and follow instructions varying on what you received. This party isn’t going to be the only thing modeled around the ’20s,” Tony winked.

After Tony’s small speech, you couldn’t help but feel a little curious. The personalized letter, delivered by Morgan? He must have gone above and beyond on these invitations. A lot of the team got up, leaving to go resume their business. Others stayed back. Sam was already sitting on the couch with Natasha, unpausing the cheesy romcom they started earlier. Steve hung back too, coincidentally he had just finished his workout when Tony called a team meeting. God did he look good!

“Are none of you curious about this personalized letter stuff?” Natasha shook her head, her red waves dancing as she did so. Sam also shook his head, eyes immediately returning to the flatscreen.

Steve sighed, lifting himself from the couch. “You know Tony and his insane theatrics,” 

When you got your letter, you were overjoyed. As promised, Morgan knocked on the door. She was dressed in a bright yellow Princess Belle dress and pink fairy wings. Her bright smile shone like a thousand suns when she handed a metallic gold envelope with your name on it. 

The second you shut the door, you ripped open the envelope. Inside, was a black piece of cardstock decorated with gold lines and other crazy details. Gold lettering described the overall setting of the party. Nothing you hadn’t been exposed to already. However, on the bottom, there was writing instructing you to look on the back. Curious, you turned the invitation around and began reading the small paragraphs on the back. 

This party was also a role-play? We all had characters. 

You? You were the “Hollywood Bombshell’, as Tony so kindly put it. The invite had a small paragraph explaining your character for the night. She loved playing hard to get, was extremely confident, and adored attention. She’d do anything in the world for it. Wonderful! In smaller writing, Tony noted that he’d be providing our wardrobe.

And provide he did. 

The long, scarlet dress that just barely dragged on the floor was gorgeous. It was pure silk, with a large slit running up the left leg until your mid-thigh. The bodice was loose. 3-finger wide straps hung off your shoulders, creating a purposeful sag right where a small bit of cleevage appeared. All in all, it was gorgeous. Tony provided accessories, a matching set of gloves and pearl earrings accompanied the stunning silk. With the whold get up on, you felt like a hollywood bombshell. Natasha insisted on assisting you with hair in makeup under the ruse of ‘girls time’.

“I bet you’re hoping Steve will be the leading actor to your actress,” Natasha winked, helping create a beautiful red makeup look to match with your outfit. She was wearing a figure hugging black sequin gown. Her ruby colored hair was paired with a small black headband. 

You playfully slap her on the shoulder, “And what are you, Cupid? I don’t think he wears a sexy black dress, Natasha,”

Natasha chuckles, grabbing your chin gently and tugging your face closer to hers. She was incredibly concentrated on finishing your pencil eyeliner. “You’re no expert on Cupid, then. Sexy sequins are in. Maybe Steve will be wearing a red tie to match yours! That would be so adorable,” Her smooth voice teased.

“With all this talk about Steve I’m starting to think you’re the one with a crush on him,” 

The redhead giggled. “I have my own tall glass of super solider, sweetheart. I can barely handle Barnes. Blondie is all yours,” She commented while resting her hands. “All done. Go look in the mirror, let me know what you think. Hopefully you love it because Tony wants us downstairs in 10.” 

You stand up, heading to the bathroom that is conjoined with your bedroom. “What is Bucky anyways?” Tony instructed everyone to not share their roles. Some people respecting the request. Those were the party poopers. Known as Sam, Steve, Pepper, and Wanda. 

“He’s a speakeasy owner. Tony put him in a sexy stripey suit,”

You twirl in the mirror, admiring Natasha’s work. “Well Miss Jazz Singer, I guess we better get downstairs so I can see this suit for myself,” The two of you linked arms, leaving your room in it’s modern day glory and stepping into the elevator. Now? You’re no longer in modern times. You’re in the roaring 20’s! A few of the Avengers teased Tony for his commitment and dedication to the theme. You appreciated it. Sure, it was cheesy. Good thing you like cheese. 

The main area of the compound was decked out. Sitting on an ivory colored table next to the bar was a gigantic champagne tower. It was nearly taller than Bucky and Steve stacked on top of each other. Gold and black were scattered around the large room, black chairs with gold cushions; golden bartop decorated with black roses. You make a mental note to ask Tony where on Earth he found black roses. Wanda was sitting at the bar with Bruce. The Sokovian was wearing a knee-length flapper dress. It was purple with small silver details scattered throughout the fabric. She also sported a pair of small black pumps and black fishnets. Overall, she looked good. Bruce had a simple white undershirt, which was stained. Suspenders accompanied the shirt, holding up his army green trousers. 

“Well hello gorgeous,” You shouted, walking towards Wanda. Her attention switched from the martini glass in front of her to you. Her eyes glowed and a smile struck her face. Bruce turned around too, looking you up and down with wide eyes. 

“Says you! You look gorgeous, what are you? A model? Because you look like one!” Wanda laughed as she spun around on the bar stool. 

You smiled, seating yourself at the open stool next to Bruce. “As Tony put it, I’m a ‘hollywood bombshell’,” You used hand quotes to emphasize the exact role you were given. “Tony made me look like a million bucks, I’ll give him that. 

You felt a hand on the back of your shoulder from behind the bar. “Ladies, ladies, I know we’re not straying away from our roles; are we?” Tony’s familiar playful tone spoke over the suddenly loud 1920’s music. You winced, realizing that was the task you were given. Simply follow your role. Do some improv. Have some fun!

“Of course not, Mr. Stark,” Bruce spoke up. Now that you were closer to him, you noticed more of his outfit. The weird stains on his tee shirt were oil stains. He was a mechanic. Wanda was a flapper. What the hell was Tony?

“That’s President Stark to you, commoner,” That answered your question right there. You laughed, excusing yourself from the bar. The room had filled up, many of the Avengers staff joined the team for these parties. The medical staff from the medical wing were here, as well as the secrataries Tony hired to answer PR emails. 

As you scanned the room, you saw Natasha and Bucky tucked away in a dark corner. As Natasha promised, Bucky was wearing a brown suit with thin white vertical stripes. His long hair was gelled back, the white lights from the ceiling comically shining off of it. Scott was sitting with Cassie and Morgan, who were also dressed up. They were playing dolls, the only modern-ish looking things around the room. On the couch, Steve and Sam were sitting and passionately talking. Steve was waving his hands around while Sam laughed. However, Sam’s strong laughter stopped once he made eye contact with you. Taking it as a cue, you strutted up to the men. 

“Hi boys,” You winked. 

Sam winked back, dramatically raising his eyebrow. “Hello there gorgeous,” He had a small business card poking out of his simple brown jacket pocked. Gracefully, you bend down to retrieve a card. Sam Wilson, New York stock broker. How cute. 

“Stock broker,” You say flirtasiously.

“Model?” Sam questioned. 

“Actress,” Sam knodding approvingly, the corner of his lips lifting into a small charming smirk. 

Steve was uncharacteristically silent. Usually during these events, he was chatting someones ear off. He insisted he wasn’t the biggest fan of the parties; yet he thought it was only polite to try to enjoy himself when they happed. You’d be a liar if you said Steve didn’t look sexy. His plain black suit jacket hugged his biceps generously. The tight mathcing pants didn’t leave much to the imagination. Steve’s pink lips were set in an intimidating frown. Like hell you’d let that scare you.

“Mind if I sit, gentlemen?” You asked.

“Feel free,” Sam stated. 

Confidently, and before you could convince yourself otherwise, you plopped yourself into Steve’s lap. His face was etched with shock, but almost immediately fell back into his serious gaze. Sam nearly spit out the water he had been sipping on. Somehow, he stopped himself. 

“I hope I’m not interuptting any business,” You combed your fingers through Steve’s hair. Like Bucky’s it also had gel. Not nearly as much, though. A few strands sat on his forehead, framing his beautiful face. Gently, you tug and twist on a few of the strands. “I’d hate to find myself in the middle of an important conversation,” 

“Hardly,” Steve finally broke his silence. “We were just finishing up,” 

“And what do you do, Mr. Rogers?” You take your hand and rest it underneath his chin, lifting it up so he is looking up at you. His striking blue eyes locked with yours in an instant. 

He cleared his throat, “I run a few businesses,” His hand found the small of your back, thumb rubbing up and down the area gently.

“Define businesses. Mr. Banner down at the bar runs a car repair shop. Gorgeous Natasha over there is a jazz singer. Entertainment is big right now, I should know. Her date Mr. Barnes runs a speakeasy. Lots of sketchy characters there,”

“I’m very familiar with Mr. Barnes’ speakeasy,” Steve growled. His large hand came resting on your thigh. Agressively, he played with the flesh. Before you knew it, there were red marks where his hand had rested mere moments before. “I’m one of the sketchy characters you’re speakin’ about, sweets,”

Despite your characters confident facade, you struggled to keep up with it. Your overwhelming crush on Steve was making this interaction incredibly difficult. You could feel the raging heat on your cheeks. You couldn’t mistake the fluttery butterflies that occupied your stomach. Tony had been roaming around the party, waiting for people to break character. Like hell you were going to be caught. Who knows, maybe this could be your shot! Maybe this is the chance you’ve been waiting for to make a move on Steve. You’ve found yourself shy nearly every other opportunity you’ve gotten. Normally, you got cold feet and ran out of the room. The amount of times Natasha has had to cover for you is getting embarrassing.

“And sketchy you are. Those damn bars are illegal, now isn’t the time to be fumbling with the law,”

Steve chucked darkly, “Oh don’t act like you’re all pure and innocent. Hollywood runs rampit with anything illegal. Your folks love that stuff,” 

“My folks?” You urged him to continue. 

“You heard me the first time, doll. Nobody in that industry is the Virgin Mary. Everyone has that one thing they’d do anything for. Don’t villainize my peers because they like a taste of scotch every once in a while,”

“I’m not villainizing your peers because they like to get drunk on the weekend, Mr. Rogers,” You find your hand back in his blonde locks, twisting and tugging as you spoke. With this leverage, you pulled his hair to twist his head, exposing Steve’s ear. You decide to whisper, making the moment more intimate. “I’m villainizing you and your peers because you use illegal practices to keep yourself in business.

“You better chose your next few words very carefully, sweets,” 

Steve Rogers was a mafia man. Golden boy, America’s solider, was a crime lord. And right now? You don’t mind. 

“You’re gonna need to try harder than that if you want to shut me up,” The words spilled out of your mouth like milk out of a jug. The words were spoken as your confident, sexy actress character. Yet they hard truth to you. Not this false self someone else spun for you. Not the person gifted the silk red dress. You. You were speaking the truth you had held in for the longest time. The confession, though veiled by flirtatious banter, was transparent. 

And Steve Rogers did exactly that. He leaned forward into your lips. His hands found their place on your hips, as yours found a place in his hair. Passionately, he kissed you. His lips violated yours sinfully, in a way that Jeuss Christ himself would need to turn his back from. But you didn’t care. 

Breaking the kiss, Steve Rogers only said one thing.

“The only illegal things I’m doing tonight are the things I’m going to do to you,” 

And you’d be damned if you stopped him.

[tomboyneedshercoffee]

Lovedust || Peter Parker x Stark Reader

Summary: Y/N and Peter have always hated each other but when Y/N discovers an element that can make people fall in love, her whole relationship flips upside down. 

Word Count: 3.9k

Author’s Note: I’m still working on the last part to thin ice but I’ve had the idea of a love potion series for Peter and since we’re in quarantine, I said fuck it. I’m such a sucker for an enemy to love type thing so this is great cause technically it’s a slowburn but not at the same time! Also Y/N is ADOPTED cause duh of course she is. Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!

Warnings: Mild language, mean peter 

part one || part two || part three || part four || part five || part six ||

part seven || part eight || epilogue 

You grew up with always hearing the saying that the heart wants what it wants. When your heart longed for a family, you found yourself among the Avengers who helped raised you into the woman you were meant to be. Deep down, you loved them more than you could possibly imagine and your heart felt full knowing they would always have your back. 

You weren’t sure how much room was left in your heart but you knew a person who you definitely didn’t make space for. Peter Parker. 

Your dad recruited him into the Avengers years ago but ever since the two of you met, you had always butted heads. 

There was a whole list of reasons why you hated him; the smirk he always had whenever he would see you and the way he said your name as if it was like venom in his mouth. 

There were times where Peter would leave smoke bombs in your room after you had just cleaned it or trap you in your room with his webbing when you were late for the movies. You always managed to get him back whether it was you throwing out all of his clothes into the courtyard when he needed to get ready for school or you hacking into his phone whenever he had an important call. 

Most of the time, it didn’t matter. You both knew you were smarter and wittier than he would ever be but the one thing he always had above you was that he had powers. It didn’t matter that you had grown up with superheroes or that your dad was the Tony Stark, Peter would always be an Avenger. 

Everyone in the complex knew the feud the two of you had but that didn’t stop them from stirring the pot now and then to witness it. 

You sat down on the couch as you continued to work on your paper quietly since you needed a change of scenery.  Bucky watched over your shoulder as he made breakfast in the kitchen. 

“ Homework?” 

“ Mhm. It’s about how the U.S could have avoided World War II if our president wasn’t so dumb,” You said as you kept your eyes glued to your screen,” I’ll let you read it once I finish it.”

Bucky smiled and turned his attention back to the stove,” Sounds good kiddo.” 

You had about thirty minutes before your paper was due and you felt like you were on a roll. You had enough time to knock out another page but as soon as you shifted to the next paragraph, loud music started to play from one of the rooms close by. 

You didn’t even have to look up to know that it was Peter. You turned around and looked sympathetically at Bucky for help but he shook his head when his eyes met yours. 

“ Don’t look at me, I’m making breakfast.”

You looked down at your laptop as if you were considering to ignore the music before getting up from the couch anyway and stomped over to Peter’s room. You could feel the vibration of the music underneath your feet as you knocked on the door violently,” Shut up Parker!” 

Not even a second later, the door swung open and revealed Peter who was only wearing sweatpants and a small smirk. 

“ What did you say? I can’t hear you,” Peter shouted over the music as he tried to close the door on you. 

You pushed the door open and slid through, heading straight for his phone that was attached to the room’s speaker. You grabbed it before he could reach you and you swiped your thumb over his phone screen to turn the music off,” You’re making my brain hurt and I can’t even hear myself think!”

“ Wait,” Peter gasped as he acted surprised,” you have a brain? I’m so sorry I didn’t even realize!” 

Peter tried to reach for his phone but you yanked it back and held your hand up,” You can get this back after I finish my paper. I’m serious Parker if I fail because of your dumbass music I’ll kill you.” 

You walked out of his room and back into the living room where Peter trailed behind you. At this point, Bucky, Sam, and Natasha were all in the kitchen as they silently watched the madness that unfolded right in front of them. 

You plopped back down on the couch but before you could place your laptop back into your lap, Peter grabbed it away from you and closed the screen harshly. 

“ Peter! I didn’t save it!”

“ Relax, you have google docs,” Peter said as he reached out his hand,” now give me my phone.”

You stood up as you tried to grab your laptop back but Peter casually held it over his head. 

You didn’t want to embarrass yourself even further so you didn’t even attempt to leap up and grab it out of his sneaky hands,“ Ugh, fine. Will you at least stop playing your shitty music so loudly?” 

Peter tilted his head to the side for a moment,” Do you really want this back?”

You knew Peter was playing a trick on you but you were so frustrated, you took the bait anyway. 

“ Yes, I would like my laptop back,” You sighed as Peter smiled cheekily back at you. 

Peter nodded and shrugged,” Okay, now ask me nicely. Didn’t your dad teach you manners?” 

You fumed silently as you tried to keep your temper down,” May I please have my laptop back...you little shit!” 

Peter clicked his tongue and shook his head,” That’s kinda mean Y/N but for you I’ll give it back...if you beg for it.” 

Your face grew hot and before you knew it, you lunged at Peter. Both you and Peter hit the floor as the two of you wrestled to try and grab your belongings back. Once you grabbed your laptop, you scrambled back up before glaring back at Peter. 

“ You idiot! You could’ve broken my-” As you opened your laptop, you saw your screen completely cracked. If you squinted, you could barely make out any words that were on your page. 

Your heart sank to the bottom of your stomach as you could feel how close you were to crying. You had been working on this paper for days and you knew you still had so much to work on. 

Peter watched your face as he visibly gulped,” Y/N-”

“ Forget it!” You snapped back as you gather the rest of your notes and pushed past him,” fucking asshole.” 

You pressed your laptop and your notebooks against your chest as you figured you could find an empty computer up in the labs. Peter hesitantly watched as you walked away and into one of the glass elevators.

“ I’m sorry!” He shouted as the elevator started to go up. 

You looked down at Peter and made eye contact with him before sticking up your middle finger. Peter shook his head as stuffed his hands into his pocket and mumbled underneath his breath. 

“You’re terrible with women,” Sam sighed as Peter turned his attention towards the kitchen. 

Peter pointed back at himself and towards the elevator,” Me? She’s being the difficult one!” 

Natasha shook her head as she grabbed her coffee mug and walked towards Peter,” Take my advice kid, if you like a girl, I would refrain from...whatever you just did. Ever heard of flowers or a card?” 

“ I don’t like her, how many times do I have to tell you guys!” Peter huffed as his face grew bright red. 

“ Even if you don’t like her, you need to at least apologize, it’s the right thing to do,” Natasha said as she patted his shoulder and walked off, leaving Peter to feel guilty. 

Once you got to the labs, you found a vacant computer in the hallway and started to work on your paper. At this point, you were just bullshitting it and after a few minutes of angrily typing, you decided you would just submit it since you were exhausted. 

As you wheeled your chair back away from the desk, you spotted Banner in one of the main labs by himself. His body hunched over the desk as he looked directly into a microscope.

Even from your position, you could see that whatever he was looking at was glowing bright pink. You rested your knee against the desk as you leaned back in your chair, attempting to try and get a better look. 

You had never seen anything in science ever give off such a vibrant color before and you were intrigued, to say the least. As cool as it was living in the Avengers complex with superheroes, you were more fascinated on what went down in the labs than on the battlefield. 

As you stretched back, you felt the wheel underneath your chair slip from underneath you and a second later, you fell to the ground with a hard thud. You clasped your hand over your mouth as you listened to hear footsteps coming closer.

The door to the lab chamber opened up to a whirring sound as cold air whipped past you, you had been caught.

“ Y/N? What are you doing down there?” Banner asked as he helped you up to your feet. 

Without missing a beat you looked over his shoulder and pointed to the glowing object,” What is that? Can I look at it with you?” 

Banner followed your line of sight to where his microscope was positioned and then back at you. 

“ Um, I’m not sure your dad would want you-”

“ Please? Just for a second, I promise,” You whined while Banner sighed as if he knew he was defeated. 

Out of all the Avengers, Banner was always the one to go easy on you and you knew he would fall for your puppy dog eyes. 

“ Fine, but just for a second but don’t touch anything,” You followed Banner into the lab as the cold air sterilized you and your clothes,” put these on.”

You put on your lab coat and gloves as you followed closely behind him. He motioned his hand to the microscope as you gladly accepted the offer. 

You peeked into the microscope as you examined the slide. It was hard to see anything besides the pink glow but after looking at it closer, you could make out small, powdery rocks as small as a grain of rice. 

“Okay well, this definitely isn’t a bunch of pop rocks so what is it?” You asked, turning back to Banner,” this has ‘space stuff’ written all over it.”

Banner nodded as you stepped away from the microscope to rest your eyes,“It’s a form of moondust that works as a highly addictive psychostimulant that directly affects the hypothalamus. Thor brought it back for the lab so I could try and make a type of vaccine since it has really bad side effects.” 

“ What do you mean it has bad side effects- is that why my eyes hurt?” You asked nervously as Banner calmed you down.

“ Relax, it’s relatively safe as long as it doesn’t come in contact with water. You know what oxytocin is right? It’s called the love hormone and when this powder makes contact with human skin-”

“ Oxytocin-So, like a love potion?” You questioned as Banner stopped for a moment before nodding,” You have to let me help you, please let me help you. School is so easy right now, I need something challenging so my brain cells don’t deteriorate!” 

You could tell that Banner was hesitant about allowing a seventeen-year-old girl to help him find a cure for a space element that was highly addictive but in the name of science, he budged.

                                                              ----

“ I think we should call it a day. We’ve been working on this for hours and we still haven’t found anything that stands out,” Dr. Banner said as he stepped away from the lab table and stretched his neck out,” I heard your dad is making dinner for everyone tonight and I want front row seats to that trainwreck.”

You checked the time and saw that it had been hours since you’ve eaten or even saw the light of day. As hungry and tired as you were, you knew that if it was a big dinner, Peter would be joining in. 

For the first time in hours, you remembered everything that had gone down earlier in the day and it just made you mad all over again. 

You backed up from the microscope and nodded as you felt how sore your neck was starting to feel,” I’ll probably head down later. I just want to be sure we’re not missing anything.” 

“ I wanted to thank you again for your help with all of this. I know it’s not your department but I’m glad to see you in the lab,” Banner said as some of the other scientists in the lab started to leave,” it’s really great to see young people interested in science.” 

“ Well, it helps when you have a great teacher,” You smiled as Banner grinned back. 

Once he left the lab, you turned your attention back to what you and Banner called “ Lovedust”. As you looked at the powder, you felt a wave of sadness wash over you. 

You weren’t sure if it was from the powder or how long you’ve been working on a serum but looking at the Lovedust made you feel helpless.

 You had been in relationships in the past that were never the healthiest but if you had known back then that an actual love potion existed, maybe it could’ve saved you a few heartaches.  

You were so deep in thought that you didn’t hear the sterilization door open as Peter stepped in quietly, watching you from afar. 

He crept up behind you to where he was a mere centimeters away from his chin touching your shoulder. 

“ Whatcha got there?” Peter asked loudly as you jumped up from your seat, shrieking. 

You hit the table with your knee hard as you whipped around, completely flustered, to see Peter leaning against one of the lab tables laughing. 

“ Very funny idiot!” You said as you smacked the back of his head,” you can’t sneak up on someone like that- especially in a laboratory!” 

Peter pushed your hand away as his gaze fell on the Lovedust that was now sprawled over the table. 

He pointed over to the powder as he kneeled in front of it,” Woah, what is this stuff?”

Your eyes grew wide as you grabbed Peter’s hand and pulled him away from the table. If Peter were to come into contact with it, who knows what trouble he could stir up. 

“ Promise me that you will not touch it! I need a sweepy thingy!” You shouted as you scrambled around the room to find a dustpan. 

Peter only rolled his eyes as he pulled up a chair so he could get a better look at the glowing dust. Peter whistled low as you finally found the dustpan that was underneath one of the lab tables. 

“ Were you hiding up here this whole time staring at this thing?” Peter asked as you stopped in front of the table and shooed him to the side,” are you going to tell me what this is or am I going to have to touch it to get your attention?” 

You set a deadly gaze to Peter before turning your attention to the mess he had caused. Banner said it was relatively harmless as long as it didn’t touch water and as you looked around the room, you noticed there wasn’t a sink or beaker close by. 

You sighed as you turned to Peter,” It’s moondust they found on Thor’s planet. Just don’t spit on it or lick it cause if it comes in contact with water, it gets super reactive.” 

Peter looked up curiously at you as he raised his eyebrow,” How reactive?”

You mimicked an explosion noise with your mouth as your hands spread out into jazz fingers which made Peter laugh. 

“ Okay, got it, no water,” Peter said before he backed up from the table and started looking around the lab. Peter watched as you tried your best to sweep up the remaining dust carefully as he leaned against one of the bunsen burners. 

“ Why are you here? Cause if it’s an apology, I don’t want to hear it,” You said finally as Peter straightened up his back,” I’m tired of your lame excuses.”

While his whole plan was to come up and apologize, he felt all that motivation and guilt fade away since you had said it in a snarky tone.  

“ Why would I apologize?” Peter responded as you shook your head, laughing dryly,” for the laptop? You were the one who lunged at me!”

It all made sense to you, Peter would never own up to his mistakes and now, his mistake had cost you another laptop. 

You kept your focus to the table but you clicked your tongue,” You know what Peter, I’m not saying you have to treat me like the Queen of England, but I’ll be damned if you don’t respect me. I think you need to remember who you’re talking to, I’m a Stark.” 

Peter moved away from the table and stood next to you with his arms crossed against his chest. 

“ You think you can intimidate me? Y/N, we’re not friends, I don’t owe you anything.”

You turned to face Peter as you felt pure rage growing inside your chest,” You’re right, you don’t owe me anything. But that suit you run around in and that room you sleep in every night is thanks to my dad. Before my dad showed up you were nothing. Humble yourself Spiderboy.”

Peter’s face looked visibly hurt for a second before glaring right back at you,” I need to humble myself? All you ever do is go around saying how smart you are just because your dad is Tony Stark. You’re almost eighteen and yeah you got a full ride to Columbia and you’re valedictorian but you wasted your whole high school years on never accomplishing anything! You never went to a single party, you never passed your driver’s test, and you’ve never even had a boyfriend before.” 

“ Newsflash Parker, I’ve had boyfriends before but unlike you, my relationships don’t dictate whether or not I’ve accomplished something!” You snapped back as you took a step towards Peter,” and at least my boyfriend’s dads don’t end up in jail.” 

Peter didn’t even hesitate as the words slipped right out of his mouth,” And at least my girlfriends actually loved me back.”

Immediately, nausea swirled in your empty stomach as your mind started to feel swarmed with old memories of every relationship you had. The room felt still and you thought that if you let a tear out, it would make noise once it hit the floor. 

Peter immediately regretted his words once again as he watched your stern face fall into a somber one. Before he could reach out to you, he felt the hair on his arm raise up at the same time. 

“ Wow, low blow Parker-” You turned around and when you looked at the table behind you, half of your notes and papers were lit up in flames. 

Before you could even let out a gasp, the sprinkler system came on as water sprayed every inch of the room, including the Lovedust. 

“ No no no!” You yelled as you scrambled over to the other side of the room to shut the water off,” Peter help me!” 

Peter carefully tried to run through the slippery floor without falling but once he saw you slip on the way to the button, he almost sprinted towards you. When he felt his foot slip from underneath him, he jolted his arm out to catch himself on the table. 

He could feel the Lovedust crunch underneath his palm as his blood ran cold. You had never told him what the powder was except that it would explode so Peter desperately tried rubbing the powder onto his pants. 

You picked yourself up from the ground and used all of your weight to press the button and stopped the sprinkler system. Within seconds, the sprinkler system halted as you looked back at Peter, who was completely drenched in water. 

“ Nice going- hey, are you okay?” You asked as you moved your wet hair out of your face before stopping in the middle of your step. 

Peter’s left hand and his whole left side of his jeans were covered in glowing pink dust that was turning redder by the second. 

“ I need to sit down,” Peter said softly before his eyes rolled into the back of his head and his feet crumbled underneath him. 

Once Peter hit the ground, you screamed for help as you slid across the wet floor, kneeling close to Peter. 

You did your best to avoid touching his whole left side as you lifted the upper half of his body and propped his head up against the leg of the table. You cupped your hands around his face as you moved a few strands of wet hair so you could see better. 

“ Peter? Damn it, Peter!” You shook him harshly as you felt your heart sink to your stomach,” Wake up! Wake up!” 

Your hands trembled as you checked his head to make sure he didn’t bust it open. Every ounce of angry you held towards him quickly faded once you thought that Peter was seriously injured. 

After shaking him for a moment, Peter’s eyes slowly opened. The first thing he could feel was warmth spreading across his whole body like nothing he had ever felt before. His heart permanently felt like it was skipping a beat every few seconds and his chest felt extremely tight. 

His breathing was uneven as if he had just ran a marathon but once his vision started coming back, every ounce of breath was taken from his lungs. As you stared back at Peter with a worried expression, his heart sped up even faster as he found himself getting lost into the deep color of your eyes. 

“ Peter? Can you hear me?” You asked as you snapped your fingers close to his ear but Peter barely flinched. 

He nodded, hanging onto every word as if it was words on a page and he felt immediate comfort in hearing your sweet voice. He managed to pull his gaze away from your eyes but next, he focused on your lips and made details of the way you said his name. 

“ Oh thank god, don’t worry, help is coming. Just stay awake for me okay?” You sighed as you nervously pushed another strand of wet hair behind your ear, which made Peter sigh deeply. 

He wanted nothing more than to reach out to you and tuck a strand of hair away from your face but he was too distracted by how you looked in front of him. Even though you were soaking wet from head to toe, Peter couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. 

“ I’m so glad you’re okay,” You admitted as you smiled before pulling your hands away from his face. 

Everything besides his heartbeat seemed to stop once you smiled and that’s when Peter deep down knew something was wrong but he didn’t care. The way your lips lifted upward into a smile filled with complete relief made his heart beat even faster. 

Peter swallowed hard before looking up at you as his face flushed a deep shade of red,” I don’t know what’s happening to me...but I’ve never loved you more than right now. I can’t help it, I love you, I’ve always loved you Y/N.” 

Your smile dropped as you looked down at Peter’s whole left side. The Lovedust was completely gone and you knew in that moment that his skin must’ve absorbed the remainder of it.

In a matter of seconds, a boy who wanted nothing to do with you and claimed no boy had ever loved you was now professing his undying love for you. 

“ You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

[birlwrites]

Isn't that hero corruption post just James Potter finding out what will happen to Sirius Black after his death and then making it the magic world's problem?

not to play devil's advocate but you have given me a fun shiny new thought experiment and I AM GOING TO EXPERIMENT IT so please don't take this as me shooting you down or anything like that, i just like exploring possibilities. also this is all my opinion and literally everyone's opinions are heavily influenced if not completely driven by their personal taste, so do not assume i think i am spouting facts here, i'm thought experimenting

(in general like - THESE ARE INTERESTING QUESTIONS TO ME THAT I WANT TO THINK THROUGH IN DETAIL, AND I DON'T WANT ANYONE TO BE SURPRISED OR HURT BY THE IDEA THAT I MIGHT NOT TOTALLY AGREE WITH THEM. that applies to literally every ask i answer. me disagreeing with an ask does *not* mean that i think it sucks or anything like that. in an ideal world we're having a literary discussion where nobody is or thinks they are the Official Truth-Sayer™)

ok so the interesting thing to me is: the hero corruption post requires, essentially, something that's going to push said hero down a loooong path. like, if we're getting to the point where the villain thinks 'oh that's fucked up,' no matter who you think the villain is, that means james has to get PRETTY FUCKIN CORRUPTED because there are a lot of villain or potential villain characters in hp that are like. i mean voldemort's fully pushing for genocide and bellatrix tortures people for fun and dumbledore is......... dumbledore (insert long paragraph rambling about different interpretations of him here)

so let's break down what happens to sirius after james's death in canon:

sirius finds lily and james' bodies (and perhaps voldemort's as well? does he leave a body the first time around? hmmmmm much to think about)

lends his flying motorbike to hagrid to get harry out of there (does he know where? does sirius know that hagrid is taking harry to dumbledore, and does sirius maybe expect not to come out of this conflict with peter unscathed? fascinating questions outside the scope of this post)

chases down peter

peter blows up a dozen or so muggles, frames sirius for lily and james' deaths, and vanishes

sirius gets arrested

sirius is thrown in azkaban without a trial

twelve years pass. sirius escapes azkaban, goes to kill peter yay!

dumbledore deigns to lift a finger to prevent him from receiving the dementor's kiss

sirius goes into hiding

sirius remains in hiding

sirius continues to remain in hiding

(without custody of his godson, btw. nor did he get to kill peter, who FUCKING ESCAPED AND RAISED VOLDEMORT A G A I N)

sirius dies attempting to protect harry, who was lured into a trap by voldemort using sirius as bait

okay let's pause and reflect on how absolutely fucking tragic that is. like, my head generally lives in the marauders' era, and since i almost exclusively write AU or canon divergence, i don't actually think a lot about sirius's canon fate. it's not even azkaban i'm referring to so much as everything after

sirius goes through SO MUCH, first of all to avenge lily and james (and he fails - peter gets away and resurrects the very person responsible for their murders), and second of all to protect harry (and he fails - dumbledore locks him away in grimmauld place and keeps harry with the dursleys, and then the newly resurrected voldemort immediately sets about trying to murder harry. iirc, sirius dies before dumbledore even shows up at the ministry, and also before voldemort like... okay to be totally honest i've read so many fanfiction versions of this scene that i don't remember what's canon and what's not, but i'm quite sure voldemort harms harry in some way. like that seems plausible yes?)

basically he goes through a ton of shit and it is all for nothing. yes, eventually harry does manage to kill voldemort/get voldemort killed, and live a fairly peaceful and safe life afterwards, but he literally died to do it. sirius could not protect him from that, much less care for him in the way that lily and james wanted him to

okay anyway back to the thought experiment. so, if james found out about all that, what would happen?

i think, anon, that the point on which we differ is that i don't see this as a slippery slope in the way that i think you do - imo, almost everything bad that happens to sirius after james's death is a direct result of the actions of voldemort, dumbledore, or peter

like yes, sirius did go to azkaban without a trial, but is that enough for a corruption arc for james? i would think that would be an anti-corruption arc involving pushing the ministry towards transparency, and tbqh i think james would be so preoccupied with peter's betrayal that the 'no trial' thing would be a contributing factor as opposed to its own thing

if i continue to guess what you were thinking of (and do let me know if i'm guessing wrong), my assumption is that you mean that in a quest to preemptively avenge sirius, james would want to go after those 3 people i mentioned earlier (voldemort, dumbledore, peter), and *that* would induce a corruption arc

that, i think, depends a lot on the characterization of james, AND the people around him. he has friends he trusts and values a lot (rip), all of whom could either be encouraging him or pulling him back

i think something really drastic would have to happen in order for james to not take those voices into account, and i don't think it would work if it were framed in future terms, because a 'this will happen' isn't as powerful of a motive towards anger as a 'this happened' or a 'this is happening right now'

now, if voldemort came to the potters' house on a different night, perhaps a night on which james was out for some reason (fidelius notwithstanding), and killed sirius instead? (among potential others - remus and lily come to mind as options who could also die) *then* i think james would shred peter, and then voldemort, into tiny little itty bitty bits

but not dumbledore, because dumbledore's role in this whole mess comes about ~12 years later

if james somehow saw the future, again, i think his reaction to that really depends on your james characterization - personally i don't really interpret james as a 'tear it all down and start over' person, seeing as he's fighting for the side of the status quo in canon, but i could see how someone could take that angle with something more focused on the 'no trial, life sentence' thing

ig a better way to frame that is that since i tend to interpret james as being constructive rather than destructive in his use of violence ('constructive' as in working off of what exists, 'destructive' as in aiming to tear that down for a blank slate), i think it would take a lot for him to go on any sort of corruption arc - regardless of his *actions*, like, a corruption arc is really a state of mind and i think that's what would require something drastic for james

but in general i don't think revenge arcs make for very good corruption arcs because once you get your revenge........ then what

like, i think a corruption arc needs a more general motive, more along the lines of why voldemort and dumbledore do what they do. that's not super tied to any one person, which means it doesn't carry that risk of *ending*. like, principles that are taken to an extreme - i'm a big fan of that. and i think a corruption arc works best in conjunction with ambition - specifically a 'road to hell is paved with good intentions' type of ambition, and since i don't interpret james as a particularly ambitious character, i think sending him down that path would take a lot more than, say, sending lily down that path would

but that's me. just because revenge-driven corruption arcs are less interesting to *me* doesn't mean they don't hold merit or interest for other people, and just because i interpret james in this way doesn't mean everyone does

[peterlorrefanpage]

It does make sense to me that she wouldn't have been told if he wanted to keep her in that dazed state of supplication/fascination, while at the same time it seems he was pretty open with the actresses if he was going to cause them physical harm.

What I also don't know is if there was more to that scene that also didn't make it to the final cut. Especially if he was practicing on a doll!

While the biography is a literal tome, I don't think even that has _everything_. Oh, to know everything!

--

Your second paragraph makes me ask - you do not have to answer! - how you feel when people respond that way to you.

I was musing about how if I mustered up the courage to tell someone about an aspect I have that I personally categorize as Not Easily Accepted By Society, would I find it useful or comforting if I received an "Oh, but it doesn't show" response? Like, okay, fine, are we all just going to keep sipping our tea and having cookies now like nothing was ever said? One can be both A Thing and also Another Thing with Even More Things, after all.

For Peter - it seems he showed and told people different things throughout his life, and more so as he neared the end of his life. I wonder what reactions he may have been hoping for vs what he received. And how his level of trust was affected.

This post of out-of-context clips is wholly inspired by the recent resurgence of Der Verlorene (1951) by @peterlorres21stcentury.

The above .gifs (which I slowed down for the usual reasons) are from a very tense, pathologically-laden moment - and it's exceptional. The way Lorre as Dr. Karl Rothe shows us everything, we're part of this killer's thoughts and emotions, the lust rising in him, the almost-certain outcome - and then he overcomes the impulse, striding away with no more backward glances.

That pearl necklace he's fondling is from this earlier scene that I knit together. The way he just looks at her - and doesn't look at her; the way he uses his hands, heavily, almost dragging them across surfaces and objects, speaks to me of how he is driving himself to think of her as an object to be removed. The way she kneels before him as a supplicant or a sacrifice. Does she know?

That above scene, that remote, avenging angel/sorrowful demon look, is what I think of when I think of that great idea to have Lorre play the Ghost of Christmas Future.

Aspects of these scenes also remind me of this scene in "Stranger on the Third Floor" (1940). I slowed this clip way down too (originally from this post) because look at him - Lorre chose to CLOSE HIS EYES when he reaches for her - he (Lorre/Stranger) is so in tune with what he is and what he does that all his senses are fully activated.

Amazing. Watching these wrings me out in a good way.

[jesuisgourde]

gay/queer references in Peter’s journals

Again, I have probably missed stuff due to going through pretty quickly and also due to having stared at this document for so long, everything has kind of blurred together.

Sometime close to the day that Carlos & I watched 'Love And Death on Long Island' (and afterwards paraded through the tea rooms of Picadilly) we both filled in application forms and were tres excited to be invited to the same group 'interview' - twas more like an audition though. I got the part. Carlos never. This did not bring any animosity - we both know that success for either of us is magnified a million times if it is shared by us both.

from 'A Diamond Guitar' by Truman Capote "Except that they did not combine their bodies or think to do so, though such things were not unknown at the (Prison), they were as lovers. Of the seasons, spring is the most shattering: stalks thrusting through the earth's winter-stiffened crust, young leaves cracking out on old left-to-die branches, the falling asleep wind cruising through all the newborn green. And with Mr Schaeffer it was the same, a breaking up, a flexing of muscles that had hardened. It was late January. The friends were sitting on the steps of the sheep house, each with a cigarette in his hand. A moon thin and yellow as a piece of lemon rind curved above them, and under its light, threads of ground frost glistened like silver snail trails. Tico Feo had been drawn into himself - silent as a robber waiting in the shadows."

Then a meet with Bounds Green's African prince outside whitechapel tube, rugged lookies at I in military attire & to a ruptured Albion rooms tidied in hours and now lids drawn heated on the eyes. A young looking fella has a crush on me.

Jackie/Camillia/Marie/Kate/Chris/V. churchill Jackie/Evelina/Jasmine/Sachi/Dalston/Sussie Sandra/Carlene/FP/Jay/Dalston/Kraut

There sat a young black man, perhaps in his early or middle twenties. He looked for all the world like the archetypal rude boy. Clean, cheap reebok, nike, adidas variously rolled, laced & zipped about his lean, spreadeagled body that hung loosely about the waiting room chair. Gold & tattoos adorned his person, and a blank animal look was attached to his clear face. He sat before me in a row of four empty chairs, staring at polished floor or the mundane television. A balding white man minced in & all perceptions were suddenly proven to be false as they embraced and snuggled up to each other, giggling & whispering & touching each others noses.... very much in love, fingers crossed for the blood tests.

[Image: an article from Gay Times of an interview with Peter. For some reason, the portrait included alongside the article is of Carl wearing a grey and black t-shirt.] Name? Peter Doherty Age? 22 Where are you? I'm on the motorway just north of Southampton. What kind of day are you having? (Vaguely) Erm... quite misty. Something's waiting around the corner, but there are no corners on the motorway, so we'll just have to wait and see what lies ahead. Maybe something will happen tonight.... What's this we hear about you once being a rent boy? Well, when times are hard, duty calls. How long ago was it? When I was 19, about three years ago. How do we know this isn't just a Shaun Ryder-type lie? 'Cause if it was, it would make me a complete scumbag and I'm not, and I'm not interested in that kind of pantomime. It wasn't a very happy time. I didn't really enjoy it. Why did you give it up? (grimly) Well, certain people disappeared... and anyway, ultimately I found myself no longer in such a vulnerable position anymore. Dawn broke, and I realised that it was a beautiful world after all. Have you done any other dodgy jobs? All of us in the band have tried to deal, but it's not good if you like the drugs too much. You just end up using them yourself! I once was a gravedigger. I used to do it with my mate in Willesden Green cemetery. We didn't actually do the digging, a machine did that, but we used to have to fill them in. It was pretty grim work. So are you gay then? Love is love, wherever it comes from. I'm not anything, really. I am a very sexual person but... I dunno, I believe in liberty... The Marquis de Sade has a lot to answer for... Do you get a lot of gay fans? Yeah - well, there's one guy in particular. He's very shy and he follows us around. He brings in letters and cards and stuff, but he's very quiet. I think John (the bassist) is the main pulling power in the band. Are you jealous about that? Nah! I've known him too long.

You know I'm alright i dont even care i like it when they stare & stare call me queer, dear oh dear a million things & what I wear He's real hard when he's with his mates but I'll saw him again & he was too late

Dear NME I'd have thought after the Gay Times piece, the interview with Rapture fanzine & our recent gig at the Slum Club everything would be clear. No it still remains to give a big hearty fuck off to all these twisted suburban types calling me a liar. Vulnerable young men & women all over the world find themselves victims of circumstance.

she was dressed in suit & tie & lightly etched-on moustache. 'I've always wanted to kiss a bird in the back of a taxi.' she says, running her hand up the fishnet ladders of my thigh. Stepping onto the front line in Bow puddles, elevators, buzzing doors,

[Image: the original page in the book has been preserved. Two paragraphs have been boxed off with biro. They read:] “...cast Richard Burton and Rex Harrison as bickering queer barbers and then much more uncompromisingly in William Friedkin's adaptation of The Boys in the Band (1970), which introduced some of the plainer four letter words in the English language to the screen for the first time. 'Who,' asks Cliff Gorman, in his brilliant portrayal of the most effeminate of the homosexual group as they gather for a soul-searching party, 'Who do you have to fuck to get a drink around here?' Other homosexual manifestations to occur in movies around this time included an elliptical but unmistakeable male fellatio scene in John Schlesinger's Midnight Cowboy (1969) when Jon Voight, as a broke and disillusioned Texas stud importunes in a New York cinema....”

[Image, top left: a blurry photo of John onstage, playing bass. Image, top right, sideways: a photo of the band onstage. Carl and John are on the left, sharing a mic. Peter is on the right, playing guitar and singing into his own mic. Image, centre left: a torn photo of Peter sitting in a chair, shirtless, playing guitar. Only his bottom half from the chest down is visible. Image, centre left: a torn photo of Peter sitting in a chair, shirtless, playing guitar. Only his top half from shoulders up is visible. Image, bottom left: a torn fragment of a photo. What looks like a denim-clad knee and a yellow carrier bag are visible. Image, bottom middle: a photo of someone's knee in torn jeans, taken from under a table. Image, bottom right: a torn photo of Carl in a black sleeveless shirt, posing with his fingers in his mouth.] [A paragraph from the original page of the book has been left exposed and boxed off with black biro. It reads:] “The Boys in the Band was displaced by an immeasurably more powerful portrayal of homosexual groups, Fortune and Men's Eyes (1971). Set in a Quebec prison, this disturbing, factually based drama vividly recounted the corrupted of a heterosexual convict trapped in a tough, potentially vicious homosexual society. In one horrifying scene, a weak, put-upon prisoner is gang-banged by his fellow inmates; in another, the 'hero' is blackmailed by his cellmate into accepting him as his lover for the duration...”

Like a cat on a hot tin roof Like a macho man in a roomful of poofs I have tried in my way to be free.

[Written in Peter's handwriting] Jerome... is that how it's spelt? [Written in someone else's handwriting] Yes it is [Written in Peter's handwriting] Can I read you something? [Written in someone else's handwriting] Yes please.....

I insist, new book of Albion, befuddled by drugs I may yes about 2 but I do not miss out entirely on the subtleties of the inhuman relation ships that are this the mainstay of my stay here in one bounce of a loaf. Boys are fooled into fooling with boys. [...]

More general references/some extra explanations:

“The boy looked at Johnny” is a line from Patti Smith's song “Horses,” part one of a three-part song called “Land.” In the song, a young man named Johnny is assaulted by another man in a locker room; he then mentally journeys to other fantastical lands and visions. A lot of people interpret it as being about gay sex, although some people interpret it as being about a stabbing.

Peter quotes and references Jean Genet's writing and works about Jean Genet many times. While Genet's works are nearly all about crime and prison (one of Peter's main interests and points of fascination), all of his works are very explicitly gay. The Thief's Journal is more about Genet's various lovers than it is about his criminal history. Our Lady Of The Flowers is about a drag queen and her criminal lovers, and is also extremely erotic.

(“Jerome” is Jerome Alexandre, vocalist of The Deadcuts, who was friends with Peter and Mark Keds.)

[lemonpeter]

Desperate

@preciouspeterbparker is an enabler 💕 and I love her for it. She sent me a concept for my au I’d explained a little while before and I was OBSESSED, so I’m sure hoping I did it justice 💕

Warnings: the whole thing is extremely nff, a/b/o, both alpha and omega Peter (I explain it here), alpha Tony, very brief bottom Tony (like one paragraph right at the beginning and Peter thinking about it), s*x toy use god I hope this shows up in the tags

@serrabloodsong

————

“Come on, baby, give it to me,” Tony panted, pressing his hips back until they were flush against Peter’s.

Peter groaned, holding onto his alpha’s hips as he kept fucking forward. He’d never felt anything so incredible, addicted to the vice-like grip of Tony’s ass. It was tight and slick and so different than the stimulation he got from just being fucked.

“I’m so close, Tony.” A soft whine escaped his throat as his hips lost their rhythm. He could feel the tension in his belly about to snap as he approached his high.

His eyes snapped open as soon as he finished, a weak moan leaving him. His hips stuttered forward as he spilled across the pillow that was tucked between his legs. His hand dropped between his legs to squeeze at his knot, now fully grown, the sensation causing his body to jolt and another spurt of cum to leak onto the pillow.

Once he had completely ridden out his high, he went lax against the bed. He was slightly sore from the amount of tension his body had held, but he’d heal. He was more concerned about the dream.

It was the fifth one that week.

Sure, it wasn’t abnormal for him to have wet dreams. Even with all the sex he had, his drive was so high that he was often waking up to slick-soaked sheets and a bit of a wet patch on the blanket.

No, the concerning part was how he was on top in every dream. And how he woke up with a popped knot.

He was a genetic miracle, having presented with characteristics of both an alpha and omega. But since he was primarily omega, it was extremely rare for him to knot anything, or even have the urge to. He always bottomed with Tony and that made him happy. He didn’t need anything else.

But his alpha side seemed to want to be brought to light suddenly. He’d been dreaming about fucking his alpha, something he’d never seriously considered before. And he woke up every morning with his knot buried in a pillow he’d been fucking unconsciously.

He didn’t know what to do.

There was no way that he could ask Tony about anything like that. For the most part they ignored his differences, especially during sex. As far as either of them were concerned he was strictly omega during those times. So it would have been odd to bring up the alpha bottoming occasionally.

And there was also the issue of pain. Alphas weren’t designed to take a knot. And it was pretty impossible without a ton of prep, which Peter was fairly sure neither of them completely knew what to do. There was no way he would hurt Tony ever. So he figured it was best to just...leave it.

Which worked...for about a week.

He kept having the dreams, but luckily Tony left for work before Peter got up, so he never saw his partner’s predicament. Peter let himself ride out the high every morning and then hid the evidence by quickly tossing everything into the washer.

It was easy enough to pretend that nothing out of the ordinary was happening. He dealt with it first thing in the morning and then got on with his day.

But then the thoughts started bleeding into his conscious mind.

He’d eat lunch with Tony when he had a break and find himself fantasizing about what it would be like to have the alpha bent over the table for him. His mind would conjure up images of Tony’s body eagerly taking his cock. Then his knot after.

Peter imagined watching in fascination and pride as his cum dripped from the alpha’s puffy hole after they were done.

His cheeks burned as the alpha brought up how distracted he seemed. “What? Oh, it’s nothing. Just thinking about...class.” Like his daily physics work would cause him to space out and drool like that.

But Tony didn’t argue, just shrugging off the answer with an, “Alright, honey.”

The excuses and zoning out were becoming all too common for Peter.

He knew that he needed to find a solution. It wasn’t going to work if he kept up how he was going.

Since he was the only person with his condition (that he was aware of), it wasn’t like he could just hop on Google and look up a solution to his highly specific problem. But maybe he could figure out smaller questions and find solutions for those instead of the big picture.

And that was how he found himself in front of his computer, staring at the search bar. In incognito mode, of course. He wouldn’t be able to look Tony in the eye if these searches were discovered.

He wasn’t quite sure where to start. The entire thing felt a bit overwhelming to him, especially since he couldn’t just find an answer for the entire thing. He had to break it up and he didn’t quite know how to.

So he tried to start simple.

‘alpha wet dream fix’

The only results he got there were articles about why wet dreams happen and instructing to just have more sexual release in the day to day life. Which he already got, he knew that wasn’t the issue.

On to the next search.

‘male omega want to top’

All that came up was porn. Pages and pages of porn.

He clicked on one link, heart pounding as he watched the small omega in the video fucking his alpha hard and fast. The alpha encouraged him the whole time, spouting words of encouragement in between sounds of obvious pleasure.

It was incredibly hot. But not exactly what he was looking for.

‘Knotting in sleep’

He got more porn, somnophilia this time. He tried to reword his search, looking into ‘alpha alone sleep knotting’.

Some more porn, but then he thought maybe he saw a search that could be helpful. His eyes skimmed over the article after he clicked on it.

“‘Sometimes an alpha will involuntarily knot during sleep, most often...if they haven’t had stimulation regularly.’” Peter read out loud, fingers tapping against his temple.

He didn’t get it. Well, he got it. But it didn’t make any sense.

He hadn’t done anything but bottom for years. And he was completely okay with it. The alpha urges hadn’t been there.

But suddenly they were. And he absolutely couldn’t figure out why.

His fingers drummed against his desk as he tried to figure out what to do next. Of course, he didn’t figure that there was any way he’d get a straight answer for what was going on with him. It was just like everything else in his life, a lot of questions with no real answers.

His eyes drifted over the search results again and he hummed as he reached the ‘also asked’ questions.

“‘How can a single alpha safely knot?’” He read off, clicking to expand the tab until the associated link came up. He clicked it as well, eyebrows raised.

There wasn’t much he actually knew about the alpha biology. Even after presenting, he figured it wouldn’t matter since he was mainly omega anyways. It had never occurred to him that maybe knotting outside of a confined environment wouldn’t be safe.

Reading over the Q&A the link brought him to, he realized that he was lucky he hadn’t been hurt by his nightly activities. Even if none of it had been on purpose.

Luckily, he was also supplied with solutions.

“A toy?” Peter mumbled. The only toy he’d ever owned was a dildo with a fake knot on it. And as far as he knew Tony didn’t own anything like what he was seeing in the pictures.

But he didn’t have another choice, really. The sleeve would provide him with a chance to test out knotting on his own and was a safe way to do it.

So he clicked over to another tab, looking up alpha-specific sex toys. And there were...a lot of results.

The alpha part of his brain seemed to switch on, immediately thinking of how each toy would feel on him and which would be best. He scrolled through pages, flipped between stores, all to end up ordering just one. A basic fleshlight that he hoped would do the job. It claimed to be for knotting as well, so he had hope that it would be good.

As he added a few different types of synthetic slick to his cart, he prayed that Tony didn’t look too closely at how he was spending money. But he knew it was all going to come out to a decent sum.

He’d deal with that when he came to it.

After confirming all of the orders, he stood up from the desk and headed back to the bedroom. He grabbed his tablet on the way, determined to continue his research. There had to be some explanation for his sudden urges.

He just had to put in the effort to figure out what it was.

***

Despite how he’d read it was dangerous, his body refused to stop its morning wake up call of an unbelievable orgasm and a fully swollen knot.

He still seemed safe, so he didn’t stress about it too much. It just gave him a bit more pause every time it happened.

And the stimulation felt so good, he couldn’t help but want it to continue on some level. But as always, the knot shrunk again once he had come down from his high and he couldn’t seem to figure out a way to get it back. The only time he was able to knot was from those dreams, his intense fantasies of fucking his alpha.

Great.

His mind was almost constantly on the concept now. He couldn’t stop thinking about it no matter how hard he tried. All of his daydreams became about topping Tony in various positions and locations. Then the daydreams snuck into his normal thoughts again. And every moment felt like one long daydream.

Only his alpha wasn’t really part of any of it, since Peter still hadn’t told him. And he didn’t plan on doing so.

It definitely made things harder. But he didn’t want to freak Tony out by revealing how needy his alpha side was getting or make him feel guilty for not wanting to bottom.

He could take care of himself. That would be alright.

***

“Pete, a package came for you,” Tony called, getting ready to leave back for work after his lunch break. “Friday just informed me that it’s at the front desk downstairs, so you can go get that.” He didn’t ask what it was, too preoccupied by thoughts of work and all he had to get done.

Which was perfectly fine with Peter.

He looked up as Tony talked, eyes widening slightly. It had to have been his toy (and the other things purchased with it.) He didn’t have a habit of purchasing much, so it had to be that if it came specifically for him.

As soon as the alpha had left, he raced downstairs to get the package. And he was ripping into the box without shame instantly when he was upstairs again.

He so badly wanted to try it out. He was desperate to knot, needing to feel how good things could be.

Peter looked over the toy, almost fascinated as he studied it. It was just like it had been in the picture, a smooth plastic body covering a soft silicone sleeve. The entrance looked almost disturbingly like his own pussy, soft pink-flushed lips spread slightly around a small hole.

He could feel himself slicking just from looking at it. And his cock was getting interested as well, slowly starting to chub up in his soft sweatpants.

There was no way he wanted to wait any longer. He was desperate to knot, his alpha side frustrated but calming gradually at the promise of knotting the toy. So he tossed the box in the trash, gathered the lube, and carried everything to the bedroom.

Once he was there, he set everything on the bed while he slowly stripped. His boxers were tossed into the hamper, already soaked through with slick. He was so easily worked up it was almost embarrassing.

But he didn’t dwell on it, sitting on the bed once he was completely bare. The bottles of lube sat next to the sleeve, seemingly begging to be picked up.

He grabbed one, reading the label. It claimed to be the best in the business, bragging about its slide. And that was good enough for Peter. He tore the packaging off and clicked the top open.

While he poured the liquid over his fingers, he looked at the toy again. “How am I doing this?” He wondered out loud, picking it up with his clean hand.

He got an idea, sliding his wet fingers over the lips of the entrance. And his cock gave a twitch as he looked at it.

It looked good, but he knew just a little lube wouldn’t be enough. So he grabbed the bottle again, pouring some of the fake slick directly into the sleeve.

And oh, it looked incredible.

It was a vulgar sight, slick dripping from the pussy. And he couldn’t wait to fuck it.

He set the bottle of lube to the side, laying on his back as he figured out what he was going to do. It seemed like a good start to just...fuck up into the toy while lying on his back. It would be a comfortable enough position to lay in when- well, if he knotted it. But he was pretty sure he’d be able to.

His hand wrapped around his cock, slowly stroking it a couple times before letting go again. He was definitely hard, erection laying heavy against his belly. But his knot stayed small, barely visible at the base.

He knew that would change soon.

He held onto his cock, positioning the toy just above it in order to start.

When he slowly started sinking the sleeve over him, he wondered why he hadn’t considered getting one sooner. It was so tight and wet and-

Completely overwhelming.

The toy was only halfway down his cock before his muscles were tensing and he was spilling into it. Just like that. No buildup, no knot, not even any actual fucking.

“Fuck, oh- shit,” he breathed, cheeks burning in embarrassment. Thank god no one was there to see him. He’d just cum like a virgin, despite being nowhere close.

Although...technically he was one when it came to topping. He hadn’t thought about that.

He pulled the sleeve off again, face still bright red. “I...wow. I didn’t expect that,” he whispered into the silent room.

The first try definitely hadn’t gone how he expected it to. But he was reminded that he had an incredibly short recovery period. Evident from how his cock had never gone fully soft and was already beginning to fill out again.

So he didn’t waste any time before he was slipping the toy onto him again, making sure to take a long pause to make sure he was under control before moving it any.

He came embarrassingly fast a few more times before he was able to actually start fucking it. And every single time his knot stayed uninvolved. No matter how good it felt to fuck into the faux pussy, he would have an incredible orgasm but his knot refused to grow.

He was lost in the pleasure and frustration as he kept going, continuing to work himself up and fuck the toy. It lasted longer every time, although he lost count of the rounds he’d done.

Probably somewhere around...five? Six? He had no idea. The first few had been so short they barely counted in his mind.

But he was finally in the best one, it felt like. It was lasting longer than the rest and if he focused hard enough it was like he could feel a faint tingling in his knot.

His high was approaching quickly and he knew it, nearly praying that his knot would finally pop this time.

But he got distracted for just a moment when he heard something.

Peter froze momentarily as he heard the bedroom door creaking open, but he didn’t keep still for long. Even if he had been caught, he needed to cum. Obviously he’d been found out anyways, he might as well finish what he was doing.

How was Tony home already? It had only been…

He glanced to the alarm clock quickly, groaning as he saw the time. He’d been going for hours. How had he fucked the day away like that?

And it was, indeed, time for Tony to be home.

“Honey?” The alpha asked curiously, stepping inside the room and looking right at the bed. He raised his eyebrows as he noticed what he was looking at, however. The sight before him definitely wasn’t what he’d expected.

Peter looked at him, a guilty look flashing over his face briefly before changing to one of pleasure again. “Tony,” he moaned. “I- oh, fuck, please.”

Tony didn’t know what he was begging for. Or maybe he did, but he was too stunned to figure it out. “Peter….” He’d never seen his partner like this.

But he didn’t hate it.

He watched how Peter’s hips kept thrusting frantically, fucking into a toy so quickly his motions were little more than a blur. And his words were flooding out before he could even think about it. “That’s it, baby. Come on, you can do it. You need to cum? Go ahead, baby. You’re doing so well.”

A choked moan pulled itself from Peter’s throat at the encouragement. And it was just what he needed to reach another high.

He twitched forward, grinding against the toy as he spilled into it. Cum dripped out of the sides, his loads still nearly full even after his fucking-marathon. “Fuck, Tony,” he whimpered, chest heaving with his breaths.

He hadn’t wanted to tell his alpha what was going on with him. But the look in Tony’s eyes made him think that maybe it would have been okay.

In his panic and high he hadn’t even initially noticed that he still hadn’t popped his knot. But he realized it once he was immediately able to pull out of the toy to move closer to the alpha who was still standing at the door.

“Tony, I can explain,” he said weakly.

The alpha held up a hand, making the other man whimper. But he quickly elaborated. “You don’t have to. We can talk later. For now...that looked amazing, baby. Did you have fun?”

Peter started nodding, but ended up whining softly.

Tony moved to the bed, looking at the toy. It shouldn’t have looked as appealing as it did to him. It wasn’t much, just smooth plastic and then soft silicone in a flesh tone that looked vaguely like an omega’s pussy. But what made it was the obscene amount of cum leaking from it. And the knowledge that all of it had come from his darling partner. “Certainly looks like you had fun,” he mused.

“I did...just…” Peter sighed, dropping his eyes to look at his cock. It was half-hard still, but that wasn’t what he was focused on. His eyes were on the slight bump at the base that stayed small despite how hard he was trying to make it swell. “Oh, Tony.” He sighed again, the sound heavier this time.

“Talk to me,” the alpha encouraged, moving to sit down on the bed. “What’s up? Wasn’t it...fulfilling?”

A weak laugh was pulled from the younger man. “Not exactly.” He crawled to the alpha, leaning against him. “I know you said I don’t have to explain, but I do.” He took a deep breath.

Tony nodded, watching him intently. “Okay.”

“You know how I’m...mixed up. Both omega and alpha.”

“Of course.” They didn’t talk about it much, but that didn’t mean that he’d forgotten. He would have been a pretty bad partner if he forgot about something like that.

“Well, I’ve always felt more omega. You know that. That hasn’t changed. But lately things have been...weird,” he said slowly.

“Okay...weird how?”

Peter looked down again. “I’ve been having these...dreams.” Oh, Tony was going to hate him. Shame him. Or something.

“Alright...dreams, weird, I’m following.”

“I keep dreaming about being on top. Uh, giving. During sex.” His cheeks burned. No matter how long he was sexually active, no matter how much they did, he’d always get flustered somehow. “And a big thing in the dreams is...knotting you.”

Tony nodded, not taking his eyes off of his partner. “And is that something you want?”

“No! I mean…yes? I don’t know. I’ve always been happy with the way we did things. And I’m still happy with it. I just.” He made a frustrated noise. “I feel like something is missing. Especially since I keep waking up with a popped knot but I can’t seem to get it any other time.”

“So that’s the reason for the toy,” the alpha murmured, looking at it. “And you haven’t been able to knot it?”

“No,” Peter whined. “I’ve been at it all day. It feels good, but there’s just something missing. I want to knot it.”

“You want to knot it or you want to knot me?” Tony asked, watching him. He cocked his head to the side slightly as he waited for an answer, eyes trailing over his partner’s body.

Peter wasn’t quite sure how to respond. Sure, in his dreams he was on top. The one in control. But he didn’t really want that. He liked the way that he and Tony did things, with the full-alpha on top. Peter liked receiving. He just wanted to knot, no matter how he needed to do it. “The...the toy. I think.”

Tony nodded, picking it up. His fingers swiped over the entrance of it quickly, gathering up a bit of the cum that had leaked out. He pressed his fingers to Peter’s lips, smirking slightly as the young man shivered before taking the digits into his mouth. “In that case, I have a proposal. You want to hear it?”

Peter nodded, still suckling on the fingers gently.

“Okay. Well, you said you’re happy with how we do things, right? So I say we keep doing them. But you can try something new.” He held up the toy again, watching Peter’s reactions. “I’ll fuck you like normal. And you can fuck this. And we can see if that changes anything.”

The younger man moaned around Tony’s fingers, nodding. He hadn’t thought of that, but it sounded wonderful.

Tony grinned at him, slowly pulling his fingers away. “In that case, do you think you have one more round in you, honey?” His hand dipped between his partner’s legs, fingers finding his entrance and spreading the lips slightly. “You’re absolutely soaked, baby. You’ve been neglecting this pretty pussy, haven’t you?” He clicked his tongue. “I’ll have to change that.”

Peter moaned again, clenching down around nothing as he felt the tips of the alpha’s fingers tracing his entrance. “Please. I want this, please. I can go one more time.” He was tired, but he was determined he could do this.

“Okay, baby. Let’s figure out how we need to do this.”

Tony hummed softly, pulling away just to assess the situation. There were a couple ways that he figured things would work out, but only one really stood out to him.

“Let’s see if this will work,” he mused. “Lay on your back, Pete.” He watched as the man did as he asked, nodding. “Good boy. Now….” he moved between his legs, positioning himself like he was going to fuck him. “Does this seem alright?”

Peter nodded quickly, breathing hard. He looked being able to watch his alpha while he was fucked. It was one of his favorite positions. But…

Before Peter could voice his concerns, Tony was grabbing the fleshlight and putting it in his hands. “So while I fuck you, you can fuck up into this. Sound okay?”

His cheeks burned as he took the toy, but he nodded. “Yeah. I can do that.”

“Perfect,” Tony murmured. “Now, want to get started?”

They both couldn’t wait any longer.

Peter nodded, the tip of his cock rubbing against the already-slick entrance of the toy. There was still cum from his previous play dripping out, but he made no move to clean it up. He figured that it would only help.

Tony hummed, looking over him. He unbuckled his belt and pushed his pants down just enough to free his throbbing cock. No extra stimulation needed, just watching and talking to Peter was enough. Plus the promise of what was about to happen.

“Wow,” Peter whispered, eyes wide. He never got over Tony’s size. And he knew from experience how good all of it felt. He couldn’t wait to take it again.

“I’m sure you’re already wet enough, honey,” the alpha mused, his fingers sliding against Peter’s entrance once more. “I know you need to be filled….” he pushed two fingers inside up to the second knuckle. “So open for me already.”

Peter cried out, clenching down around the fingers. “Please, Tony. I need- fuck, I need you to fuck me already.” He didn’t want to be teased and fingered slowly. He wanted to get to the main event.

“Needy thing,” Tony commented, pulling his fingers out quickly. “But I’ll give you what you want. Just don’t forget that you’re supposed to be fucking that while I’m fucking you.” He tapped the toy.

“Of course,” Peter told him, the tip of his cock still poised to push into it as soon as things started.

“Okay, good boy,” the alpha praised gently. He rubbed the tip of his cock against Peter’s hole, watching how it fluttered in anticipation of what was to come.

He just couldn’t help himself.

He started pushing in slowly, a low groan building in his chest. No matter how much they had sex, Peter was always so perfectly tight. It was incredible every single time.

And at the same time, Peter sunk the toy onto his own cock with a moan. The dual sensations were incredible, better than he ever could have imagined. He felt Tony filling his pussy while his toy squeezed around him deliciously.

Just the initial feeling was almost enough to push him to the edge again. But he managed to calm himself down.

Tony took a shaky breath, taking a moment to get used to the tightness around his cock. It was intense, Peter obviously had only been focusing on his own cock. So his pussy was still incredibly tight, and constantly clenching down as he got used to the different sensations.

The alpha was pretty sure that neither of them would be lasting very long. But he knew it wouldn’t bother him. And it probably wouldn’t bother Peter either.

“Ready for me to move?” He asked gently, holding onto his partner’s hips carefully. He saw the look on Peter’s face and laughed softly. “Oh, I know. I mean, I can only imagine how intense things are for you. But they feel extra intense today even just like this.”

Peter smiled a little, nodding. He looked so fucked out already. “Yeah. I’m ready, alpha.”

Tony began moving his hips, just slowly at first. He didn’t want to completely overwhelm either of them. “Tell me how it feels, baby. Fucking your little toy pussy while I fuck you.”

“It-it feels really good,” the younger man whispered. That was a severe understatement, but he found it hard to form words. His hips thrust up into the toy as Tony fucked into him at the same time. Everything was sensitive and pleasurable and perfect.

“Just good?”

Peter whined. “It’s amazing, but- oh, god,” he moaned. His eyes rolled back as Tony started moving faster already. “I’ve never felt so…so good.”

Tony hummed, biting his lip as he kept his thrusts at an even pace. “Really? Hmm, let’s see if we can make it even better….”

“Wha- oh, fuck!” Peter groaned, hips jerking faster as he felt Tony’s fingers brushing over his left nipple. His nipples were always extra sensitive, but adding it to everything he was already feeling was intense. “Don’t!”

“Don’t? You want me to stop?” The alpha grinned at him, moving his hand lower again to rest on his hip. He moaned softly as he watched his partner fuck faster into the toy.

“Just stop that,” Peter instructed. “I don’t- god, don’t want to cum too fast. And it’s already...I already feel….”

Tony hummed, nodding. He couldn’t deny that he already felt the distinct pressure building as well. “It’s okay, baby. But I’ll stop.” Both of his hands stayed on Peter’s hips.

“Thank you.” Peter held onto the sheets with one hand, the other working to quickly slide the sleeve over his cock as he fucked it. His grip tightened on both things and he felt the plastic creaking under his fingertips.

They kept going, bodies in sync. Tony gazed down at his partner, eyes occasionally dropping down to watch everything else going on. But he loved to just watch the pleasured faces that Peter made.

And the other man was feeling nothing but pleasure. He’d held out as long as he possibly could and knew that he wouldn’t be able to hold off the high that was building. “Tony….” He moaned, movement becoming jerkier and less measured. “I’m- fuck, I’m gonna cum, alpha!”

“Then cum for me, baby, let go. This will be the best one,” Tony encouraged, not stopping his movements. He knew that he wasn’t far behind at all.

Peter whimpered, hardly doing anything more than just humping up into the toy now. But- “Tony! Fuck, yes,” he moaned louder, watching as his knot swelled rapidly.

Exactly what he’d been hoping for.

He thrust weakly, forcing his knot into the tight sleeve and he was done. His vision whited out as he came, hips bucking wildly. “Tony!” He cried out, tears leaking from his eyes at the intensity of his orgasm. And it seemed to last forever, the tightness of the toy milking his knot in a way he didn’t know was possible.

His vision blurred again and then he was out, going limp against the bed.

“Shit,” Tony swore, immediately pulling out despite how incredibly close he was. He wouldn’t continue anything without knowing Peter was okay.

It took only a few seconds for him to rouse again, blinking dazedly. “Did I just- oh my god.” He covered his face with one hand. “Please tell me that didn’t just happen.

Tony still looked a little concerned, but laughed weakly. “Which part? God, baby, that must have been good.”

“It was amazing.” And he was still riding out aftershocks. “But...that was embarrassing,” he mumbled. Then he noticed that Tony was no longer inside him and looked painfully hard. “Alpha! I didn’t mean to make you stop.” He wiggled slightly. “It’s okay, I’m okay now. Keep going.”

The alpha chuckled a little, more relaxed. “You’re something else, you know that?” He repositioned himself properly again, tip pressed against Peter’s now-loose pussy. “You’re sure?”

“So sure.”

Peter had gotten what he’d wanted. So he’d be happy to help his alpha.

He finally popped his knot, feeling more fulfilled than he had since the dreams started. And he’d been able to be with Tony to make it happen.

They’d have to do that more often. Although he was sure that neither of them would complain.

[biboocat]

Middlemarch by George Eliot.

I was impressed by Eliot’s depiction of provincial English life in the early 1830s, her understanding of human nature, and eloquence. The novel also has fascinating characters. The characters fall readily into one of two groups: the selfless/honorable and the selfish/dishonorable. In the former we have Dorothea Brooke, Caleb and Mary Garth, Tertius Lydgate, and Will Ladislaw. In the latter we have Rev. Casaubon, Rosamond and Fred Vincy, Peter Featherstone, and Nicholas Bulstrode. Eliot describes the various social boundaries that define her characters: gender, class, marriage, wealth, and politics. But it is apparent that despite the importance of these categories, none have any bearing on whether the characters are good or bad. And in the last paragraph Eliot believes that good works are not the sole purview of “historic acts” (presumably performed by privileged men). These egalitarian views presumably support the movement of major social reform that culminated in the Reform act of 1832.

Some memorable quotes and excerpts:

“We mortals, men and women, devour many a disappointment between breakfast and dinner-time; keep back the tears and look a little pale about the lips, and in answer to inquiries say, ‘Oh, nothing!’ Pride helps us; and pride is not a bad thing when it only urges us to hide our own hurts – not to hurt others.”

“At all events, it is certain that if any medical man had come to Middlemarch with the reputation of having very definite religious views, of being given to prayer, and of otherwise showing an active piety, there would have been a general presumption against his medical skill.” 😂

“She (Mrs. Garth) had that rare sense which discerns what is unalterable, and submits to it without murmuring.”

“But it is seldom a medical man has true religious views – there is too much pride of intellect.” 😁

“For having early had strong reason to believe that things were not likely to be arranged for her peculiar satisfaction, she (Mary Garth) wasted no time in astonishment and annoyance at that fact. And she had already come to take life very much as a comedy in which she had a proud, nay, a generous resolution not to act the mean or treacherous part.”

“It is certainly trying to a man’s dignity to reappear when he is not expected to do so: a first farewell has pathos in it, but to come back for a second lends an opening to comedy…”

“Many of us looking back through life would say that the kindest man we have ever known has been a medical man, or perhaps that surgeon whose fine tact, directed by deeply informed perception, has come to us in our need with a more sublime beneficence than that of miracle-workers.”

“What do we live for, if it is not to make life less difficult for each other?”

“People glorify all sorts of bravery except the bravery they might show on behalf of their nearest neighbors.”

“And, of course, men know best about everything, except what women know better.”

“Only those who know the supremacy of the intellectual life – the life which has a seed of ennobling thought and purpose within it – can understand the grief of one who falls from that serene activity into the absorbing soul wasting struggle with worldly annoyances.”

“Science is properly more scrupulous than dogma. Dogma gives a charter to mistake, but the very breath of science is a contest with mistake, and must keep the conscience alive.”

“How can we live and think that anyone has trouble – piercing trouble – and we could help them, and never try?”

“for the growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts; and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs.”