#like they actually are

[babydipper]

Jason didn't think he would ever wear a comm again, but here he is, fighting some shitheads while answering a phone call. Jazz calls a lot and most of the time, he needs both his hands when she does, so he took the measures needed and put a fucking comm into his mask.

“When are you back?” Jazz asks, the sound of running water soft in the background.

“Why? Miss me?” he pants, sending a thug to a wall and helping another one onto the floor with a precise kick.

He doesn’t have to see her to know she's rolling her eyes. He dodges a blow. “You said you'd be here by eight and it's already quarter to nine. I made dinner, Red.”

It's not like it's his fault people want to use his drugs for human trafficking. If the deal went the way he intended it to go, then he would have been back already. “I can reheat it,” he snaps, irritated, because there's too many men he wants to kill around him now and Jazz is distracting him enough to have some punches land on his body.

She's not impressed. “There's a new episode of The Circle.”

“Okay?” It's not his fucking problem and she's not his fucking responsibility.

“I want to watch it before work today.”

“Have fun?”

Jazz sighs. “Half of the point is to watch it with you.” She has finally finished with the dishes because the water has stopped. Jason trips and almost falls, but manages to land with grace and mask it as a way to dodge a bullet. Jazz promptly ignores the shoot out. “If you tell me you've been watching without me, you're sleeping on the couch.”

Jason chuckles mid kick, a knife in thug's palm. It's a good one. Jazz can be funny sometimes when she doesn't make him want to kill her or himself. “No, I am not,” he goes, even if he is. It's his turn, so she gets the bedroom.

“Stop picking two fights at the same time.”

“Why? Are you going to punish me or something?”

“Oh my god, I am hanging up. You are the absolute worst.” Jason is straight up laughing now, the bubble of green, sticky anger swallowed in the pleasant sensation. “When are you going to be back?”

“Forty minutes, top.”

“Okay. Have fun, be safe,” she goes before hanging up.

And when she does, Jason finally gets out his guns. It would be so fucking useless to talk through the sounds of the bullets.

[vamptits]

I can't keep having the same conversations about love languages, mbti, iq, bmi, "brain fully formed at 25" and shit over and over again...

[letthehatersbark]

The funniest one star review of Wicked I've seen so far

[kiwi]

anybody else feel that being human is like being a long-time syndicated cartoon character watching the world get more complex while your own design stays the same until youre incongruous with the reality around you??

[bitchfitch]

writing advice for characters with a missing eye: dear God does losing an eyes function fuck up your neck. Ever since mine crapped out I've been slowly and unconsciously shifting towards holding my head at an angle to put the good eye closer to the center. and human necks. are not meant to accommodate that sorta thing.

[hellbabyfromhell]

just saw this clip and i think itd make a funny reaction image what do u think... does it have potential

[izukuer]

characters have to be a little bit awful in ways that you cant defend. its good for the ecosystem. your honor he did do that. He did in fact do that

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

that article going around abt firefox's new ad program is annoying bc it's phrased as though "mozilla has finally TURNED on its people and is SELLING YOU OUT for cold hard cash!!" when. that's not what's happening. it is specifically being implemented to discourage tracking behavior, and literally all the data they are giving to advertisers is aggregate and anonymized, which is like, the opposite of what that post wants you to worry about, lol

[snowstories]

My biggest tip for fanfic writers is this: if you get a character's mannerisms and speech pattern down, you can make them do pretty much whatever you want and it'll feel in character.

Logic: Characters, just like real people, are mallable. There is typically very little that's so truly, heinously out of character that you absolutely cannot make it work under any circumstance. In addition, most fans are also willing to accept characterization stretches if it makes the fic work. Yeah, we all know the villain and the hero wouldn't cuddle for warmth in canon. But if they did do that, how would they do it?

What counts is often not so much 'would the character do this?' and more 'if the character did do this, how would they do it?' If you get 'how' part right, your readers will probably be willing to buy the rest, because it will still feel like their favourite character. But if it doesn't feel like the character anymore, why are they even reading the fic?

Worry less about whether a character would do something, and more about how they'd sound while doing it.

[anotherpapercut]

I don't really think it's fair to dismiss the idea that that guy might have been framed for killing the CEO as like an unfounded conspiracy theory when NYPD has a proven history of planting/fabricating evidence on people. in 2011 there was a massive investigation of the NYPD and hundreds of cases against people were dismissed after a former police officer testified that they literally have a name for planting evidence on people: flaking. you cannot be out here acting like considering the possibility that cops who do this shit under normal circumstances might possibly also do it when they're under intense global pressure and scrutiny is the same as republicans thinking democrats run a secret pedophile ring in the basement of a pizza restaurant

[aropride]

interaction i have with shocking regularity is when someone’s complaining abt someone they know and theyre like “ughh they’re 21 and dont have a job and refuse to learn to drive” and then they remember who they’re talking to (me. 21 cant work cant drive) and go like

[evidently-endless]

i think we should remind musicians they can absolutely make up little stories for their songs btw. it doesn’t have to be about them at all. you can invent a guy and put him in situations to music. time honoured tradition in fact.

[some-pers0n]

How it feels getting obsessed with something new and then realizing you're going to spend anywhere from a week to the rest of your life thinking about it

[specks-of-time]

[windwenn]

‘You were my new dream’ or however the fuck that scene went