#like the reason theres no succession fandom is because its good

[homebecomesthehighway]

you know, maybe the shitty shows we watch really were the friends we made along the way

I've been in some of the most toxic fandoms full of little freaks and weirdos, but I still always come back because I love listening to people talk about things they love with all their heart. like, I know the things I'm watching are all "bad" things to like, and I know they're problematic and toxic and full of shitty manipulative people that only wanted my money and attention. but I'm never going to forget how I felt loving those things, and the people that loved those things with me. and I will always remember crying and laughing and feeling boundless joy, and I'll remember the theory posts and fanart and stories and the discourse so much more than the actual media because it is the purest feeling to love things together

[archer3-13]

I dont think there's ever actually any confirmation on what Rasa [fourth kazekages] relationship was like with his other children, cause thinking on it i dont remember any commentary from the other sand siblings on what their relationship was like with their dad.

certainly they don't seem too aggrieved that hes gone, but at the same time thats because originally the fourth kazekages death was a complete afterthought. relevant only in the sense it was an out from further suna konoha conflict, and by the time the sand siblings showed up again other things were more important/relevant to the story. when rasa showed up as an edo tensai could have presented that opportunity of learning what those relations were like, but rasa showing up again is solely for the gaara therapy hours so he can get some closure. in that moment rasa might as well not have had any other children and gaara might as well not have had any other siblings.

not that i think rasa being a shit dad to his other kids is unreasonable fanon [cause that is technically what it is with the main story being reluctant to comment any which way], as interesting as I find the man he is much like chiyo a cock, cause everyone in suna projects as much asshole energy outwards as possible. and his handling of gaara as a human being was deplorable, even if it also highlights the very real and unaddressed problems of the shinobi world and its values where human individuality, liberty and rights are sacrificed in the name of village prosperity and nation statehood [as opposed to just him being a cock].

but by that same token, I think all thats really confirmed about how he treated the other sand siblings is that he kept gaara forcibly separated from them. and if you separate gaara from the fandom woobification of him and think about it from the perspective of a military nation states leader it makes sense to keep your dangerous ticking timebomb unstable murder weapon away from the easily breakable children that represent the villages chances of future success. I'd almost call it good parenting even [bar that gaara is also his kid] to keep the children away from the unstable murder weapon that keeps accidentally maiming anyone it gets close to.

but i think a lot of that is kinda irrelevant to the actual discussion fandom seems interested in on this matter, because I don't think most people headcannon rasa as a bad father to temari and kankuro based on the patterns of his characters behaviour. I think most people do it out of this idea of "sand sibling solidarity". gaara's the baby woobie of the naruto fandom [its most widely accepted one anyways], and the sand sibling dynamic is a popular one. so its cathartic to blame any of their earlier problems/dysfunction and distaste for gaara on the big ol mean rasa/fourth kazekage.

and I think thats entirely too lame, cause it turns the sand siblings and their dynamic into temari and kankuro being gaaras generic yes men. a problem that does kinda intrinsically infect the original work mind, given that after the chunin exams the sand siblings disappear up until the sasuke retrieval missions ending at which point they're all suddenly buddy buddy with each other. but thats something that was a consequence of time and narrative flow, keeping the story focused and all. but fanfiction offers the opportunity to flesh these things out, and theres some real interesting ground in how the sand siblings transition from being completely fucking terrified [for fairly understandable and reasonable reasons] of gaara to being his pillars of support as kazekage following the [partial] failure of konoha crush. reducing it to rasa being the evil bad man who kept them separated when they actually wanted to be gaaras friends all along, is such a waste though.

anyways, feel free to crucify me now for being mean about the writing around the sand siblings.

[geffenrecords]

I still would like to see your stuff about diary of a wimpy kid. hand it over 🫴🏽

oh boy um. okay. so i hauvent posted abt them in a long time but i imagine if youve followed me for long enuf you remember....and boy theres a lot to sayhere

so the context is that like when i was like 14..me & my at the time best friend became just like. obsessed with the diary of a wimpy kid movies. and im dead serious we were obsessed with them. we watched them all the time and talked about them for hours. like im straight up we loved these movies. my only possible defense for what was up with me is that i was really anorexic haha so i was really weird in the head. but anyways, obviously mostly people only talk about those movies because they like rodrick and well looks around yeah. but also ☝️ we were retired glee kids. my friend had previously been the biggest fan of the warblers from glee (who altogether have maybe 8 minutes of screentime) and we were retired newsies fans. we were really cringey fandom kids still & we were really really good at loving total nothing background characters. so !

if you pay attention. in the first movie rodricks band consists of 1 redhead kid on guitar, some emo kid, and some other random guy. in rodrick rules/dog days, his band is two guys named ben and chris (plus bill in rodrick rules and some random kid they found for dog days). chris doesnt have any lines i dont think but he is there a lot in rodrick rules. i dont have any evidence but im like 79% sure he was definitely high during the filming. and if he wasnt hes really good at acting it. ben does have lines though :-) in rodrick rules he and rodrick drive rowley and greg home and discuss what song theyre going to perform at the talent show and he says "dude we'll get to go backstage" at the party scene.

um. anyways yeah. we made them into what was pretty much our own characters and gave them a whole story which is so long and. in all honesty i just forgot so much of i make shit up all the time for it when i do stuff with it now. but its silly and long and to sum it up -> ben works at office max in a mall (i dont think they have office max in malls) and rodrick keeps coming in to print/copy band posters. one night he breaks the machine so he and ben talk and rodrick asks him to join his band. he says yes, so ben and chris join the band which is rodrick and matt (emo kid from the first movie, who guess what doesnt say a single thing. he just stands there and claps at the sorry women scene) also the big joke with matt was that he works at chuck e cheese and hes the guy who wears the mouse costume and ben rodrick and chris all keep going there and pissing him off and eventually he gets mad and yells at them and thats how they all meet. i think thats what we created him for basically. ben is rhythm guitar/vocals, chris is bass, rodrick is drums, and matt is lead guitar. they break up at the end of highschool and reunite after dropping out of college and get world famous haha. just think like really annoying music kids in like 2007 who actually have a successful band...(their song is rodrick rules is good...i promise go look it up).

but ya. its unfortunately such a personal story to me atp that i cant let it go even though im not even friends with that person anymore. and also i dont really care. its funny & i draw them so much now and also. rodrick rules is such a good fucking movie. i dont care its definitely in my top ten favorites im deadass. whatevs.

other noteable things from this is kitty. whos my oc completely but shes chris' girlfriend and we made her up because the whole joke was she pegged him to paramore. hides my face this is just who we were at the time. but i draw her more with my own ocs than i do with chris her boyfriend who is the only reason she exists. i think thats all. im sorry this is so long but ive never actually explained the whole thing. theres so much more but i literally wont stop if i start. go thru the doawk tag on my blog 4 further explanation or ask me...i love talking about them please please.... bonus drawing of them i just did for this👍

[s0lar-ch3ri]

no because ive fucking hated before how the fandom wiki just gave him a title for each friend and shit but thinking now it actually fits him so well and i dont think anybody could play gillion like charlie because charlie does genuinely remember like all his bits and gillion would hold himself to all of his actions and all because thats what he knows and its a cycle of abuse but its not really influenced outside the circle but rather himself and maybe he knows its bad or maybe he doesnt and either way he cant stop it. gillion wasnt raised by the elders to be a child soldier, he was raised to be a tool, a sword, because calling him a soldier means they gave him some kind of humanity and theres no way they could fit him being a person or humanoid into being a hero and champion and now hes stuck needing to show people hes more then what the elders made, hes a good person despite their teachings which is why hes doing the same exact thing they did to prove it becuse thats what he knows how to do and if he can show them all with his words and actions surely hell be good enough, better then what the elders made him! hes kept this act up so well hes fooled himself, made himself think hes grown past them all, and that whole illusion crumbled before his eyes when that tree told him what he needed to hear even if it destroyed him completely. the reason the machine didnt do shit to him was because he was always obient to the elders, he just didnt know it. he thought he wasnt. now that he knows maybe he can move past it, but maybe he needs to know to be weak and fragile and that 90, 70, 50, hell even 25 percent is just as okay as 110 percent and in his case would be way betetr for him. he doesnt need to prove himself to everyone but maybe its not even to everyone hes trying to prove. hes telling himself. he has to keep those standards up, work it and shit. if he doesnt declare his friendship status with everyone aloud is he really their friend? if they cant hear and see his greatness is he really even good? is it enough? will he ever learn that? no. he wont. hell never fucking know hes a horrible hero, terrible champion, and that is a good thing. he doesnt need to be a champion. his friends give him names to maybe help but he just sees this also as a medal, a sign of his good deeds. he cant be gilly because thats just a shown success. he needs to get the successes! thats how he shows the elders hes more then their failure! hes his own success, and its the worst thing imaginable. gillion tidestrider, please be that. please be gillion tidestrider, nothing more. you never had to be more. your more then a tool. you CAN be more then a tool. it starts by learning how to be gillion tidestrider.

someday i will rememeber to ramble about how gillions trauma with the elders makes him hold his accomplishments above his head like hes a dog and he has to do tricks but the prize is being a good hero and its a treat hed never get and he knows that at somepomt they were wrong for it but he doesnt see whats wrong when he does it himself and really he needs to learn hes gillion tidestrider and more then just what hes done and said but until then anything and everything must be made into a title to show and prove hes a good person and hes a good hero but most importantly that hes a person and its so bad he cant even have a nickname because that too is a title showing how hes accomplished a bond close enough with someone to be given it but really its all hollow and empty and he cant be gillion or gilly he needs to be only gillion tidestrider and learn while right now hes nothing more then his titles and nothing without them he can amount to become something he just need to have the hard truth set in that his worth doesnt come from being a hero or even being good but by being himself

[journen]

how did you get into art/get so good! i feel like every time i try it's a huge flop and i despair that i will never be able to draw anything original

Hey anon! Thank you for the question! This is gonna be a long post but i’ll trap some of it under a read more lol. So sorry for the essay in advance!! And i also wanted to say, when i saw your message i immediately thought of this post. Its v accurate and true.

So anyhow… got into art mostly when I was 11… I really liked the game Zelda Skyward Sword lol, and started trying to come up with and illustrate my own original zelda stories, etc… (not that they were any good i was a kid haha🤣) and then I ended up doing this for other fandoms i got into in the future! And so i just kept drawing? I always have a million story ideas in my head, and drawing is my way to get them out of my head and see it as an illustration lol. I didn’t actually start taking it seriously until 2019 tho. It took a long time, and theres still a million more things i can learn and improve at, progress can be slow but my main advice is to…

Draw what inspires you, especially when you are starting off! And especially if it’s just a hobby! Because the key to improving, is to just keep drawing. You will not improve in any other way. And having fun with it is so important! And you mentioned being concerned your work has to be super original…if you think originality will get you success - you are kinda drawing for the wrong reasons I think. Try to have fun with it first, and you will find your original style as you go and improve.

Anyhow, improvement can take a long time, and if you’re like me, you’re always going to think your stuff isn’t good enough and you should be better, but you can’t let that get you down because otherwise you will give up, and we are better than that right?

More under the cut!

And you mentioned your work “flopping” - don’t judge your worth / skill over how many notes something you did gets! 🥺 This is the social media curse lol. The amount of attention your work gets is not an absolute measure of your skill whatsoever. Try to learn to draw for your own enjoyment, and not compare yourself to others because we all have different levels of experience and different things we are good at. I understand the despair feeling tho lol, but if you get bogged down by the negatives you will never improve. 💛

Oh! And as you go, the more you improve, then you can start doing more fine tuned studies(like environment/anatomy/lighting studies) but using reference is always good too when you are drawing! I never draw without ref lol, but maybe that’s the concept artist in me. Drawing is hard work tho and you end up having to put the work in if you really want to improve eventually, but if you draw what inspires you then it doesn’t feel like as much work as it is. 😉

Anyhow, sorry for the essay! I just have a lot of passionate thoughts on this topic. Thank you for the question anon! Idk if this helped at all, or was interesting, but yeah!! 💛💛 Please keep drawing and don’t give up! And feel free to reach out if you have any questions in the future!

Heres one of my fav memes as a treat for reading this whole post

[sunleaffe]

the whole guizhong reincarnation thing with ningguang really has me thinking and honestly it makes me lean towards the ningguang and zhongli pairing a lot. now im not the biggest fan of zhongli’s story (in terms of his current whereabouts and choices) BUT the idea of him leaving li yue in charge of his dead wife’s reincarnation scratches a particular itch in my brain.

theres a lot that kind of points to the theory of reincarnation with ningguang and some of the more notable ones that ive noticed are listed below. a spoiler warning is in effect so scroll at your own risk!

- she is extremely powerful for a geo user. a lot of geo character abilities revolve around construction (hence geo construction inc. being a meme), but this could fit in thematically of being a fallen god that is rebuilding what was lost to her. her shield (?) ability is different than other geo characters. zhongli literally creates a pillar, lumine/aether build...a more stout pillar, and albedo has a lotus elevator lol. but ningguangs is more functioning as a wall of protection while also not exactly being physical per say. it looks more like a transparent scroll when unrolled, sort of like transluscent magic at play.

- in the fight against osial, ningguang uses a lot of magic that does not look elemental based lol. it just looks like...pure magic. i wonder where she picked that up or if shes just naturally gifted in channeling magic like that. there were lots of symbols that did not look geo related in many of the cutscenes. but thats just my observation. 

- her ascension materials include glaze lillies which we all know zhongli will NOT shut up about. even if current glaze lillies aren’t the “real deal” as zhongli puts it, having them be her ascension materials is a big deal. im not entirely sure about the entire story revolving around them but i believe they carry a symbolic meaning of the wishes of people (i remember lumine had to sing to one to harvest it correctly or something). it seems to bear a lot of importance to zhongli and his past, and i may be remembering this incorrectly/it may be a fanmade fact but i believe rex lapis and guizhong led their people through fields of glaze lillies during the archon war. plus you can find all sorts of fanart of zhongli standing in a field of them lol.

- ningguang mentions having a dream where rex lapis came to her before she had to rally the qixing against osial in the last archon quest. idk if other archons do that or if zhongli regularly shows up in people’s dreams, but its a “hmm” moment considering zhongli did plan to leave the fight up to the adepti and the qixing. perhaps it was his way of passing on his duty to ningguang by visiting her in a dream to help her in her fight. not only that, he was close to guizhong. perhaps he is giving back what he feels was hers to begin with? part of li yue’s rule? who knows.

- a LOT of fanmade designs of guizhong mirror that of ningguang’s. this isnt like a “ahah its coming together” moment as much as the ones mentioned above but its a neat tidbit regardless

- ningguang started from nothing before becoming one of the richest if not richest person in li yue. her decision to sacrifice the jade chamber shows her selflessness and devotion to her people, qualities that guizhong most likely exhibited towards her own people before her tragic death. not only that, it fits thematically with the concept of archons, meaning that it was possible for humans themselves to ascend to celestia (though i think you have to be a vision bearer to be able to do that). assuming that all gods in ancient times started as nothing (such as venti being nothing but an elemental being) and had to earn their spot in celestia, then ningguangs path to success and rulership closely resembles it, albeit in more modern terms.

- zhongli definitely does know about ningguang and shows quite a lot of respect for her, even chiding people about not touching pieces of ningguang’s property after fragments of it fell from the sky after the fight against osial. okay, sorry, tangent time, but how does he know that stuff was part of her tea set? or is he just good at guessing everything lol? did he ever go to the jade chamber and have tea with ningguang? who knows.

and some of my personal reasons why i like the pairing:

- yes childe can be zhongli’s wallet but ningguang could be his vault 

- their color pallets match so well. its kind of like how chongyun and xingqiu’s match perfectly lol.

- they are both tall. you get a tall aunt and uncle. posh wine aunt and broke uncle vibes?

- the idea of them being intrigued by each other due to past lives and connections- im a sucker for that idea

- zhongli learning human connection while also still having a part of guizhong with him at all times?? exquisite

- its rare. im gonna be honest, some rarepairs just make me smile and i wish more people considered them. the only other one i can think of rn is scaramona (but mostly because their colors fit well together again).

wow this was long idk if anyone will read it but if you do, lmk your own thoughts on this reincarnation theory!! id love to hear them! and also please remember to be respectful! as with any fandom, i am aware that some are very steadfast in certain ships, but lets all let each other enjoy what we enjoy, thank you!

[anti-endings]

I’m fairly sure at this point that Naruto is more or less fascist propaganda. There are so many things that we as a fandom want to turn a blind eye to yet when SNK was called out for being fascist, we had no problem boycotting it because it wasnt an anime that we’d come to love throughout our childhood. Unfortunately Naruto was a lot more subtle and pulled a fast one on us towards the end - 14/15 years after its initial release. 

Theres a lot of intricate reasons as to why I’d call it fascist but I’ll list the general points to be made that everyone can easily recognize. 

• Genocide for the good of the nation. This one is pretty obvious but I thought I’d get it out of the way. Slaughtering possible defectors of the state is apparently an honourable and justified choice. Even if some members of the oppressed minority were completely unaware of their leaders planned coup or had no desire to revolt against the system, each and every single one of them apparently deserved death. 

• Brainwashing children into military violence goes completely unquestioned by the narrative. The only people who challenge this idea are portrayed as “hateful.” The best example of this is how the narrative feels the need to emphasize that Itachi murdering his clan was his own decision. I just find it awfully strange that we’re expected to believe that a 13 year old, who was sent to fight in a bloody war for his country when he was just a toddler and was shown to suffer from severe PTSD, apparently wasnt brainwashed with threats of war on his impressionable child brain when he was already completely numb to the concept of killing people. Itachis history details the story of a brainwashed child soldier yet goes to great efforts to brush it aside and give Itachi the autonomy that he never actually had. On a meta level it’s pretty messed up that Itachis actions as a result of his brainwashing, was praised by Hashirama Senju - the ultimate force of “peace” who founded the village and “the will of fire” that were so expected to admire. 

• Consistent denial of blatant military violence. In the manga, the truth about the Uchiha massacre is covered up by Naruto, Sasuke and eventually Sakura to “maintain honour of the Uchiha.” This makes absolutely no logical sense whatsoever. How is it more honourable to say that a clan was slaughtered by a rogue criminal of their own (further perpetuating the selfish, bloodthirsty and power-hungry stereotype) when the truth is that an oppressed group of people were slaughtered off by the government? How can an act of genocide be prevented by a future government when the truth is actively censored by the governemnt? Neither Naruto nor Sasuke did anything to implement some sort of bill of human rights, laws or Geneva conventions in honour of Uchiha to prevent more innocent bloodshed at the hands of the state.

• Ultranationalism at every opportunity. The village is literally gated off. No one enters or leaves without permission from authority. The unification of the village under the statist military + the slaughter of any and all potential defectors is pretty telling. Its scary that “the will of fire” and protecting the state is the only honourable and good goal/ideology to have in this series as shown by Sasuke only ever being seen as “not evil” when he is beaten down into conforming to the government.

• Evil is in the genetics of the oppressed. This was pretty unsettling to witness and I’m surprised there havent been more people speaking out about it. Ideologies are inherited not just by fate, but by your genetics. The Senju-Uzumaki obviously have “The will of fire” which is known to be the supreme ideology. It consists of uniting and enduring the hardships of the world under the totalitarian government but NEVER pursuing revolution or change for the better. “The curse of hatred” is its counterpart which has its origins exclusively to the Uchiha. Its explained to be Uchiha culture to some degree. The narrative very desperately tries to paint the pursuit of revolution to prevent more violence as evil, bloodthirsty and selfish. This, in reality, makes no sense. Why are the Uchiha hateful for trying to fix a situation for the better of their family yet somehow the senju arent characterized by hatred despite openly hating the Uchiha? Simply put, the Uchiha are GENETICALLY undesirable and their push for equal rights are characterized as hateful, selfish and lonely. In reality, Madara Uchiha would not become a rogue ninja who decides to attack the entire village including his own family with Kurama because he could not get equal rights for the Uchiha. This doesnt add up with why he was so angry in the first place. Non of the “bloodthirsty” actions of any Uchiha do. They’re a fictional race of people that are only evil by the design of the author to portray oppressed people as selfish and aggressive. Towards the end of the fourth war, the story of Ashura and Indra is told to Naruto and Sasuke. Indra is apparently the original Uchiha who was influenced by some deranged evil spirit to pursue power over unification for completely selfish purposes. This is very unfairly equated to Sasuke and the rest of the Uchiha clan to explain to audience that the Uchiha are inherently evil and selfish detractors. 

• To be a revolutionary is to be lonely. This ties into my last point. Sasuke is constantly referred to as lonely by just about everyone in the cast, Naruto especially. This has always been bothersome because Sasuke wouldnt have been lonely if his entire clan wasnt slaughtered by the very same people that Naruto stands by. This point is incredibly simple yet its overlooked because the anti-uchiha propaganda is so successful in what it sets out to do. To add onto this point, what if Naruto had simply said to Sasuke “I believe you have every right to bring the murderer of your clan to justice and I’ll stand by your right to justice every step of the way” instead of physically fighting him and screaming at him all the time? Sasuke isnt inherently lonely exclusively by his own means, he is alienated by everyone around him. The narrative acknowledges Sasukes emotional unfulfillment, IGNORES the real reason why hes lonely and then states that the only way that Sasuke will find a sense of family through the acceptance of his peers is if he conforms to the government and adopts the hegemonic ideology…. after “repenting” for ever daring to get justice for his clan in the first place. This eerie emotional blackmail is completely normalized and unquestioned by the narrative. It sends a harrowing message to the audience that it’s more desirable and fulfilling to conform to the government despite their poor treatment of your people and should you question otherwise, you must repent for forgiveness. 

• The leader of the village is the most powerful member of the military, who is chosen exclusively through nepotism by a rich man who owns the land instead of the people, and is in power for an indeterminate length of  time. Again with the military obsession! Not even necessarily the best military commander or anyone with experience in any leadership position at all. This is partly fascist due to the fact that theres no limitations on what a Kage can do to their village, they’re selected through nepotism and not democracy and they’re in power for as long as they please no matter how the public feel. The leader is not necessarily someone who is shown to be compassionate, responsible, trustworthy, intelligent or reliable. In fact, you could be a known, unpersecuted war criminal like Danzo and still get the position. 

• To add on to that, war criminals in the Government or Military go completely unpersecuted and often unpunished - as shown by Danzo and the village elders. The village elders are still in the same position during the events of Boruto as they were in over 20 years ago when they conspired to execute the Uchiha massacre. Naruto and Sasuke know of their involvement yet havent held them accountable in any way. 

• Child soldiers are sent to die for the government. It seems that only Obito notices this when Rin dies. The second he becomes critical of the fact of this reality is the second he becomes “hateful” and “evil." 

Theres plenty more but I’ve already spent an hour typing this up and checking over every little detail. Generally speaking, much like SNK, the theme of Naruto is to just simply ENDURE hardship, stay loyal to your government at all costs even if they cause the hardship and NEVER revolt. Naruto as a character serves as the purpose of being as reductive as possible to every single character that faces hardship with "I too was lonely and oppressed but I coped by worshipping the government for a sense of emotional validation and you can too!" 

[botwstoriesandsuch]

Sidequests are part of the story so it’s still my ballpark shut up it’s time for

Read Part 1 here!

Part 2 || Part 3

If you’re on mobile, and tumblr hates this post, follow along on this google doc!

Rules/overview this rewrite in the beginning of Part 1

- - - - - - - - - - 

Side quests, side quests, side quests. What are they? And what are they doing here, on an Age of Calamity rewrite? I must admit, game design is not an inherent forte of mine, and I like to think that my only “expertise” would be on writing and storytelling. So what the fuck is a fool like me doing here

Well my dear ladies, lads, and gentlefolk, if your memory does serve, I did say that the format of Age of Calamity was one that served the major plot and story beats for it’s cutscenes, and its worldbuilding and good parts of it’s character development for its gameplay and side quests. It’s actually a concept that can be seen in shows and movies too, although obviously it’s origins are in TTRPGs and videogames. Definition wise, a side quest is any deviation from the main story and plot that serves to flesh out an optional/overseen aspect of the game. So there’s out perfect outlet for worldbuilding, characters, and even a bit of humour. Side quests, by definition, can’t simply be just XP grinders, because otherwise you could…..just make an XP grinder. It’s like saying you’re getting your kids a bike, but then you get them a stationary exercise one. Sure it’s functionally the same and gives the same benefits, but it could be so much more. 

Does Age of Calamity have good side quests? I’d actually argue, yes. I mean sure, it’s not exactly gonna hold a candle to Fallout or Witcher 3, but there are great memorable side quests that do serve their purposes in this game. 

A fan favourite is “The So-Called Knight,” in which Link spars Mipha, Teba, Sidon, and Revali, a conflict of the Sidon’s confidence and belief in Link, with Revali’s skepticism and grudge against him. Not only is it great fandom content, but it explores the carrying POVs of several characters in a fun way. We also have Hestu’s Dance Competition, and the Miss Vai Battle Pageant. What they lack in serious character tone, they make up for in humour and world building. Even the quests that have nothing to do with the main cast of characters, like the Questionable Escort Mission, still provide funny and interesting details about the world, like how the Yiga Clan is still ever persistent in trying to take down Link with monsters and Windcleavers alike. 

It’s not like those side quests were functionally useless either, all of them still provided great amounts of exp and materials. What specifically made them great and memorable was their small little stories and character/world details. Of course, that’s not to say you can’t have the occasional plotless boss rush every now and again, those are fun in their own right and it’s good to have variety. But just thinking about it...what were everyone’s least favourite sidequests? The timed Yiga Escape?  The ones where you sit around defending strongholds? The one hit death Hair-Width Trials? Ah...so all the least enjoyable side quests were the ones that were difficult, with no enjoyable character or worldbuilding to back it up….interesting interesting….interesting pattern indeed. 

So, let’s improve the game a bit further. I do need to pace out my future character arcs somehow. I tried to make use of the existing quests where I could, but it’s just eaaaasier to just not think about it and do it from scratch. Just shove these in place of all those quests whose only description is “monsters have been spotted here! Take Mipha and go to work!” and stuff like that. Alrighty then! Here’s my take on cool side quests for every single character thus far, along with their paired gambit attacks. Prepare for heists! Drama! Simping! And Bananas!

Link: Mastering Stasis

Ok I have no idea when this quest unlocks so just for my purposes assume this only becomes available after Link pulls the Master Sword. 

Engage the hordes of monsters that have been spotted in Hyrule Field. Now is a great time to master the use of the Stasis Rune. Impa and Zelda accompany you, but it seems stasised monsters aren’t the only thing coming to a tense standstill…

This isn’t anything that special, I just want to further highlight this tension that Zelda and Link have, as it’s something touched upon in Botw, but never really mentioned or used ever in Hwaoc. Now more than ever, Zelda has an excuse to have a rocky relationship with him because she could actively see just how far he’s coming in such a short amount of time. Classic “he probably hates me so I guess I’ll hate him” thing.

You play as Link, the game gives you your little prompts on how to use Stasis, you take out a few hordes of Bokoblins and blah blah blah. I wanted to use an earlier level to establish Zelda’s relationship sooner as obviously it’s gonna be important to the story. But of course like all side quests it won’t kill you to skip out. Text dialogue can be Zelda saying science shit like “This will be a good opportunity to test out the full limits of the Stasis rune” and then Impa’s all “Yep! We got your back, Princess! We’ll clear out these monsters in no time.”Then Link the little angsty shit that he is says nothing, and as you play you clear out more and more bokoblins Zelda just says “...” and then we can toss in a Moblin or two in there for gambit voice stuff.  

Gambit dialogue with Impa would be supportive, her usual spunky dialogue. I had two ideas for Gambit attacks with Link: One where Impa does that thing where she cuts a giant laser through the air, but it’s aimed towards Link and he parries it right in a monster’s FACE because I think it’s badass and also a good way to show trust and stuff. The second thing was Impa’s giant bomb barrels, but Link is the one to somehow ignite them, because he is an arsonist after all. He can even have a chaotic Sheikah blue glint in his eyes like blue flame, I can already picture it so clearly given how anime/dramatic Impa’s movements are. Impa sets bombs, Link *teleports behind Moblin* nothin personal, kid. 

Also right at the end of their gambit attacks, Impa and Link should try to fist bump or something (cause the whole “cool guys don’t look at explosions” thing that Impa usually does on her own) but are interrupted by eggbot jumping up to try and join in. And then Impa can be annoyed and try to punt it or something. That’s not just self-indulgent that’s in her character she totally would and I want to make use of the fact that eggbot travels around with Link. The success of her attempts to punt him can vary.

If Link does a gambit with Zelda, her dialogue can just be her usual monotone Princess stuff, “Thanks for lending your strength,” or “There is still much more to do!” just purely professional, we’re not at a stage yet where she’s buddy buddy with Link. Their gambit attacks can still be cool though. One idea I had was Zelda using stasis, and you know how when you use it in botw everything lights up with that sonar effect? So Link stands besides Zelda, and she activates stasis, the first “sonar” light wave reveals the stasised monster, and you see it from the view of the Sheikah Slate. Then with each additional flash of sonar you just see this silhouette of Link going absolute ham on a monster. And then when the stasis “ding ding ding ding ding” is done, everything’s just dead. Can you see my inspiration from Persona 5 yet? Second idea was Zelda using cryonis and makes an ice ramp for Link to shield surf on and ram into a monster. For entertainment purposes Zelda should also be putting frogs on said slide. (Also also the reason I’m putting Link as the main focus for those gambit attacks is because I want to juxtapose it with future gambits where Zelda may or may not be more powerful…)

Anyhow anyhow, so this side quest, you beat some bokoblins, theres a moblin or two. However as you progress Zelda’s dialogue because a bit more passive aggressive, maybe Zelda can be a bit irritated at how quickly Link is defeating everything before she can even contribute. Impa can comment on this like “She hasn’t exactly been warming up to you, has she…” and then the last point of the side quest, Zelda runs off, there’s a...let’s say a big horde of blue or black Moblins. Or a horde of Wizzrobes, I’m not too picky on it. Link can save her and do a gambit or whatever, but the point of importance is that Zelda leaves with the clear mindset off, “You don’t need to keep coddling me, I can handle my own” to Link, but is “Thank you, I’m glad you’re here,” to Impa. 

Now I stole was inspired to use this based on this comic by @novellanova, and you should check it out here. But basically, at the end when all the monsters are dead and the last few text boxes are rolling, Impa says something like “Gee, at this rate I might have to protect you from the princess! Hmm…. you know, maybe if you two had the opportunity to hang out more and get to know each other, she’d warm up to you! Ha! That’s it! I’ve made up my mind. Listen up Link, from now on I’m gonna let you man the wheel when it comes to protecting Zelda. So with me out of the picture you better take the opportunity to be the nicest, most helpful, and most effective body guard there is. I know you already are, but still, if I hear that one little Chuchu so much as splat in her direction I will take you down...got it?” And, that’s that.

Side quest done. Fun Link gambits with Impa and Zelda, some little character POVs on the situation, plus an explanation as to why Impa doesn’t accompany Zelda everywhere/nods to the cutscenes of Botw as to what happened to Impa. Alright, that was probably the most boring one so let’s move on to

Daruk: A Rumbling Stomach

Alright I’ll be honest...I have no idea what to do with Daruk. Especially when Yunobo’s not here, I got zip-zero to work with considering his character is non-existent. Further down the line I’ll certainly try to give him more nuances and the like, but I’m afraid the majority of my character efforts have been towards Astor, Revali, Zelda, and [REDACTED] so this is my apology ahead of time, rock fuckers.

This is my take on how to make those timed quests more fun. So basically, the premise of this stage is that Daruk was just happily hanging around trying to enjoy his rock roast, when a monster surprised him and he dropped it, and now it’s rolling down the hill. This is based on my real Breath of the Wild experience where I had to trek up that Volcano path to bring a rock roast for that shrine quest, but at the very top I dropped it and had to chase it down before it fell into the lava below. 

Daruk is eager to chow down on the finest rock roasts this year has to offer! It’s too bad things go downhill when monsters start to ambush. Defeat key enemies and rescue Daruk’s tumbling meal before this year’s wait goes to waste!

So, that’s what this is. The stage opens and Daruk says “NOOooOO! My rock roast! Damn monsters!” and you have to defeat baddies and catch up to the rock roast before the timer runs out and it falls into lava. And then when you finish and get back the rock roast that’s pretty much it….except SIKE no it’s not. Because a lot of these timed quests usually have a “surprise! There’s more!” thing at the end so I’ll do that here too. So Daruk has saved his rock roast and he’s talking about how he’s going to enjoy it in all its deliciousness, when he’s cut off by a random Goron’s scream. Turns out, Daruk’s yelling at the monsters about desperation to retrieve his lost lunch has attracted monsters to some traveling civilians, and now you gotta go beat a Talus, or a couple of Moblins, or something...Again I don’t really have level set or idea when these side quests unlock so just use your imagination. Once Daruk defeats the monster(s) the Gorons can thank him, and then one of the Goron kids can be like “Ooo! Is that a super special rock roast?!?” And Daruk is all:  “Ah! Well all the best Goron heroes eat plenty of rocks! This here is the gourmet stuff. You can only get it once a—” And the kid’s like “Woah! I’ve always wanted to have one, that’s why I’ve been training hard so I can explore more of the mountain. Where’d you get it??” And Daruk can sputter a bit, before finally sighing and giving into his instincts. “Ah….well, why don’t you have it? You’re probably really hungry after running around with those monsters…”

“Woah really?? Are you sure—”

“YEAH JUST TAKE IT ALREADY GO”

“Woah, thank you!” and then the Goron kid and co run off. Cue Daruk crying to himself in the background. Daruk may have an appetite, but I like to characterize him as the Goron Hero first and foremost.  

I’m sure that doesn’t stop him from mourning his rock though.

Mipha: Stronger Sentiments

Mipha and Daruk talked a whole bunch about training together so that Mipha can grow stronger, and Daruk was catching on to her crush on Link and it was a nice interaction in between them except for the fact that we never see them do the damn training so that’s what this is.

I think this is as good an opportunity as any to make this a Hair-Width quest, the ones where you can’t take one hit. The difficulty of a level is one of the most effective ways to put the players in the boots of a character to experience the same struggles they do. If the player works hard, then they automatically associate that with the character working hard. So, yeah, let’s have Mipha kicking ass and working to be strong enough to protect Link.

Mipha is determined to grow stronger. Daruk and the other Gorons are helping out with an intense training session by Gut Check Rock. Prove yourself by defeating all the enemies you encounter!

So Mipha is sparring with the Gorons, you fight through them and the captains and blah blah, the final boss is fighting Daruk without getting hit. 

“I promise not to hurt you more than I’m capable of reversing.”

“Ha! Give me all you’ve got, princess!”

You fight, cue the special music or whatever. I mentioned that gambit dialogue/attacks could also work to be custom for the character that you’re fighting, so I’m thinking something like this. Daruk slams the ground and rocks and magma sprout up around him like jagged pieces of glass, but Mipha is no where to be seen. Daruk’s kinda huffing and puffing, “Where’d you go Mipha…” and then FWOOSH, giant geyser right behind him. [yes I KNOW I overuse the *teleports behind you* “nothing personal, kid” thing but I think it’s COOL and you can’t stop me] So anyhow, you know that thing in Avatar where Pakku is just riding at the top of a whirlpool and destroying everything? That’s Mipha.

Daruk turns around and scratches the back of his head. “...huh….that’s not good.” Cue Mipha swooping down to deal the defeating blow. 

So Mipha wins, she can mention how wonderful it was and how much stronger she feels. And she can thank Daruk, and he’s all “No problem!” but he mutters something like “And I thought Gorons hit hard...now I know how Link feels.” End side quest….SIKE it’s another surprise boss at the end. A Goron captain suddenly reports that an Igneo Talus has appeared nearby. 

Mipha goes up to fight it, but wow! Link is already there. They both fight it, but it’s clear that Link didn’t need her help that much. You can defeat the Talus with a Mipha/Link gambit. It’s similar to Link’s usual “swing sword in a giant circle and become a death windmill” but Mipha kinda enhances it with water or something and it puts out the Talus. I wanted this ending with a focus on how strong Link is just to show that while Mipha is improving, she’s still not yet where she needs to be. 

Daruk: “Sorry I wasn’t much help at the end there, I was busy, uh, stretching.”

Mipha: “Oh it’s quite alright, Daruk. We were both quite tired from today’s training.”

Daruk: “Well I dunno about that...seems to me you were quite lively and active as you fought beside Link. *wink*”

Mipha: “Huh!?!? W-What is that supposed to mean??”

Cue laughter from Daruk. Mipha is flustered. And Link is just...confused, as always. 

Urbosa: Mighty Thunder of the Gerudo

So in the game this is just some normal outpost capturing, stronghold defending side quest, but we’re gonna spice it up just a bit. 

An important excavation site is being overrun by monsters, and Urbosa has set out to engage them. Defend and capture the outposts, in order to prevent this valuable place from falling into enemy hands…

So you fight as Urbosa, defeat some enemies and blah blah. When you first arrive there, I want one of the Gerudo Captains to be like “Lady Urbosa? Where did you come—What are you doing here? Aren’t there areas of greater importance for you to be at right now?” Urbosa says something like “Nevermind that now, let us focus on achieving victory over these rotten beasts.” 

As the battle goes through, it is revealed that this excavation site is where Zelda’s mother would often work and hang out with Urbosa. Urbosa says some stuff like “Her Majesty would not be happy to see all these monsters heading here!” *decapitates Moblin* and then she can say other dramatic stuff at the end like “We have fought well...for her memory” and other classic lesbian pining. Some guard at the end can say “Perhaps you should move on and help out somewhere else, Lady Urbosa. We can handle the clean up from here.” 

“Sure,” Urbosa replies, “Just another moment.” And then cue reminiscing. “She always did love these machines…”

And just other sentimental stuff like that. If you’re gonna be a coward and hold out on the Champion death angst, then you best be pumping that angst and emotion from somewhere, you know?

Also yay for worldbuilding! At least in my rewrite, the Guardian excavations and stuff were overseen by the Queen. Could be a reason Zelda hangs out with Sheikah tech so much...who knows who knows... who knows what other implications this has, it’s just a side quest after all.

Revali: Anti-Ice Training [get it??? Cause in this one, Revali’s gonna break the ice with some other characters?? I’m funny I swear]

Ok so for this one, I want to pull Revali’s character away from just “the birb that doesn’t like Link” and give him some other stuff to stand on. Obviously, there would be other side quests in a fully fleshed out game that did even more to characterize him, but for my rewrite I’m only dedicated this post and one other future post to sidequests, so I gotta really bring out what I can for the few side quest stories I have time to tell

Revali sets out alone to deal with some monsters by the Hebra trail. Although intended as an isolated moment to hone his skills, he finds himself with unexpected company. Defeat key enemies.

So you play as Revali and at first you’re alone, taking out Ice Lizalfos and the like. Revali’s text dialogue can say stuff like “Hmm...not fast enough” “My current needs to be stronger” “*mutters* Can’t compete with lightning and magma with aim like that.” Just stuff that establishes that he’s working hard to really prove himself as the best, but is still a bit insecure about his position. He thinks he’s better than Link, sure, and he certainly thinks that being a princess or a chief doesn’t automatically make you the best. However by this point, Revali has battled alongside the other Champions and seen their skill in battle, and has developed some respect for them. Afterall, Champions were chosen in some part for their skills, unlike Link or Zelda who destiny just thrust greatness upon. 

So Revali has this slight insecurity that compared to lightning, and magic healing, and magma, with chiefs and princesses and titles of heroes, he and his efforts will be overshadowed and forgotten, unfairly deemed the useless one. Thus, here he is, training in solitude, not wanting anyone to see the imperfections and mistakes until he is absolutely perfect.

Except for the fact that after you beat a Wizzrobe, the other three Champions show up. 

Revali: Wh—Huh?? What are you all doing here?

Urbosa: Well, we all have to travel with the princess to that Tower in a few hours, so I recommended we find you and hang out until then

Mipha: And a good thing too! Look how many monsters there are

Revali: I’m actually doing very well on my own right now. Wouldn’t want you to catch a cold or something, so why don’t you head on back and let me handle this.

Daruk: Aw, it’s not that we think you can’t do this. It’s that you’re hogging all the fun! Urbosa: And that it would be more efficient if all of us went to work

Daruk: That too

Revali: Look it’s not—you all can’t just—this is not just about—AUGH, look, I’m just trying to train myself at the moment, and I don’t need you all to mess with my drills

Urbosa: Training, hm? Well how about this...you let us continue helping you with these monsters, and after, I’ll let you in on a good Gerudo training technique

Revali: Hmph. Fine, whatever gets you out of my tail feathers faster

So Revali and the Champions clear out the monsters. Revali can have gambit attacks/dialogue with each of the other Champions. This is already incredibly long so perhaps I’ll save specifics for another time, feel free to use your imagination. Urbosa teasing Revali and they make a thunderstorm, Mipha and Revali swimming in the sky and kissing—wait that’s— 

When all the monsters are cleared, which honestly isn’t tooooo many, Revali speaks again.

Revali: So what’s this oh-so-holy technique you had in mind, then?

Urbosa: Ah yes, well really it’s quite simple. It’s called…

Urbosa: One-on-one combat

Now Revali fights Urbosa. It think it’d be really fun if your allies on a stage could swap to a boss, and I wish hwaoc had a bit more freedom with the interactions as a whole, but ah well, that’s what I’m here for I guess.

So when you/Revali defeat her, it’s a good accomplishment! Not only for you the player, as Urbosa would not be the easiest to beat, but also because match-up wise, Revali prevailing over Urbosa is a big feat as their styles are quite opposite, arguably with the strength in favour for Urbosa.

Revali might at first have the mindset that Urbosa is overconfident and thinks she’s got an easy win on Revali, but that mindset is quickly proven wrong when 1) the difficulty of the gameplay itself shows how they’re both doing their best and 2) Urbosa with her Gerudo qualities is probably shouting stuff like “give it your all!” and things.

And so, as you beat her...

Revali, kinda huffing and puffing, but just a bit:: ...you….held back

Urbosa: Come now, do you really think of me as someone who’d do that? I’m almost insulted.  

Revali: Hmm...perhaps not then....

Mipha: Wow! What a wonderful fight from both of you. 

And then insert some other dialogue from Daruk or something that shows the Champions acknowledging the training and hard work Revali must have put in to be so skilled. Perhaps it’s not so bad, when you train with others and your skill is fully appreciated by your frie—GAH. Perish the thought, they’re all just a bunch of royal fools who can’t hold a candle to the skill of a Rito Master….probably…

Revali: Well unlike you lax fools, I tend to take my job seriously. I don’t have time to longue and banter when the princess is still expecting me in an hour or two

Urbosa: Oh alright, let’s get to it then. What’s the expression? “The early bird gets the w—”

Revali: Gross. No. Don’t finish that sentence, I beg you. 

Urbosa: Oh? Well why don’t you fly off to escape my dreadful tones then?

Revali: ...Heh, don’t be absurd…

Revali: Without me, you’ll all probably get lost. So, I suppose I should stick around for that sake Great Fairies: Dress to Oppress 

The Great Fairies are holding a fashion competition and rating people’s outfits. Poorly judged outfits gives them the right to compensation combat. Defeat all your less than fashionable allies.

...

...yeah.

It seemed funny in my head, alright? cOme on, just imagine…

Revali, fully expecting to win: Well?

Great Fairies: Hm...I don’t know dear, all the colors are very clustered. Perhaps if you were taller—?

Revali: bWHAKT!? *other angry bird noises*

- - - 

Daruk: I brought my BEST out today! :D

Great Fairies: Is that a….chain?

Daruk: TWO chains, actually. :D

Great Fairies: Oh honey…

- - - 

Great Fairies: Ooo! Our little hero is about to come out! Wonder what he chose...a knight in shining armour? A handsome desert voe? Ooo!! And those Snowquill braids always made him look so cute…

Link: *comes out in the Tingle Outfit*

Great Fairies: …

Great Fairies: …………..hm…..

At the end of the side quest, after you beat everyone, the Great Fairy wins because of course they do. 

Great Fairies: Oh my! What an unexpected outcome...but it really couldn’t have gone any other way. I declare the judges the winner! I mean just look at me, I’m as dazzling as a jeweled desert flower, because I am! Ohohohoho…

This side quests unlocks the Tingle Outfit

Hestu: Forest Dance Festival

Alright this quest was already pretty perfect, BUT, I just want to use this opportunity to say that all of Hestu’s gambit attacks makes his allies and enemies do special dances. Absolutely abSURD that Hestu can only make the lesser smaller enemies dance on occasion, nonononono, my guy Hestu is making everyone dance. You can’t stop this. Nothing I say will ever top the imagination, so just take my word that this is a good thing. [Reluctant Revali doing the macarena against his will in sync with Hestu and they bash someone’s head in...ah the possibilities.] 

Maz Koshia: Links to the Past

Ok so before I get into this, a few things. This quest takes place well after the tower activations in Akkala. Age of Calamity leaves a whole lot of plots holes as to why a Monk is just...here, and what the point of the shrines are, and personally my first reaction to all this was just a five minute extended “huuhhhhhh???” 

So here is my headcanon, explanation, thing, canon to the world of the Kip Cut story. Ones all the Sheikah Towers were activated, that officially woke up all the Shrines, because we know that the Towers and Shrines are all connected to the same system. [See Great Plateau Tower activating all the Shrines and Towers, and Creating a Champion explanation on the system] But when all the monks were in their little altars and noticed how Link hadn’t dont a single one, they were like “what the fuck.” Monk Maz Koshia, who is kinda the head honcho of the monks and probably the only one powerful enough to go out in the world anyhow, sets out to see what the deal is, and after many a teleportation and telepathic communication, he figures out that Link is just running around with the Master Sword already. This kinda confuses him, because the whole point of the Shrines was to test Link and give him the spirit orbs so that he could grow strong enough to get the Master Sword, but he somehow already has it...so hmmmm something fishy is going on in this timeline. So Link technically hasn’t proven himself at all, Maz Koshia ambushes him, they do their little combat trial, Link passes, and Maz Koshia’s like “ok cool so you’re not useless.”

So now Monk Maz Koshia has cast aside his old monk duties of waiting around for a couple hundred years, in favour of just hanging out with Link and continuing to train him combat wise. Shrines are still explored by Zelda and co because they are important areas to establish teleportation pads, and whenever they’re there, Maz Koshia forces Link to get in a shrine to get a spirit orb, which is not only useful in general for health, but since Link already has the Master Sword, the other characters can get the spirit orb too. (So all those little heart upgrades that you see on the map, those are all just in the real Botw Shrine locations, rather than just scattered around randomly. Also I’m ignoring the stuff about talking to Hylia in order to exchange for stamina or heart containers because the game never talks about her, or stamina, and I’m not about to create an entirely new custom gameplay feature for this game, fuck you.)

I like to think that Maz Koshia is very selective about the Shrines he encourages people to try out. “Oh nonono, don’t bother with Qukah’s….lazy ass, only set up one little mountain that you have to blast through with lightning and that’s the entire puzzle! Disgraceful...Here, Kaam Ya’tak has set up a wonderful Trial of Power for you. I’m sure you’ll find the level design quite thrilling. They spent a lot of time on the critical thinking aspects so have fun!”

“I should warn you that this one was made by one of the millennials...yes, those youngins who were only initiated 1000 years of age. Honestly, they lack so much experience. Ms. Agana over here was experimenting with something called ‘motion controls?’ Pretty lazy if you ask me. Traditionally I would just stick to combat and block and switch stuff...but ah well, variety I suppose.”

Right, what was I talking about? Oh right! This is a sidequest. So Monk Maz Koshia doesn’t really have...a character??? Or a personality??? So I don’t really know what to do with him other than use him as an outlet for world building. Apologies to the Monk….fuckers? Stans? Feel free to leave me a comment about how I missed all the nuances of his character or something I’m all ears.

On an expedition to mark more Shrines and establish more teleports for the Kingdom, a large horde of monsters is spotted, seemingly with the intention to destroy these Ancient relics. Link and Maz Koshia use this opportunity to sharpen their combat skills. Protect the stronghold and defeat key enemies.

And then that quest would just kinda echo the stuff I said earlier about the world. (As Maz Koshia defends a Shrine, somewhere Qukah Nata is smugly shouting “Bet you wish ALL of them were protected with a giant mountain now, do ya?)

Also Link and Maz Koshia’s gambit attack involves the Master Cycle. I don’t have the specifics, but damn if I want some call backs to Botw while also having fun.

Impa: Steal Yourself [Yiga Clan Escape]

In an act of pure hatred and malice, the Yiga Clan has snuck into Kakariko Village in the dead of night…and stolen all the Swift Carrots! Impa sets out to get them back, as well as taking something else as a form of swift revenge...Escape before the time runs out.

Ok I can explain.

So you know how the Yiga and the Sheikah have kiiiiinda been murdering each other a bunch in Botw, going as far as to kill a deserter’s wife and threatening to murder his kids, and also people on both sides were sorta massacred for no reason? And alsoooo one of those people who literally lived during that time of the massacre is just kinda floating around now?  And you knooooooooww how the Yiga Clan just kinda joins Zelda’s side later on and we’re not supposed to think about the implications of that too hard because they’re the funny banana ninjas, haha? Yeah well neither Age of Calamity or I really have time to explore the moral grey areas of an alliance between two warring factions, one of which has a leader who doesn’t really seem to remember the reason why they hate Hyrule which brings into question whether the lackeys even know their clan’s history, and brings about the moral dilemma of criminalizing the ignorant, and also there’s the whole other dilemma of depicting the side that submitted to their oppression as being “in the right” and the topic of a race of people being pitted against their own by a higher power is really brushed over sO WE’RE JUST GONNA TOSS ALL THAT OUT THE WINDOW AND MAKE THEM ACT LIKE RIVALLING HIGH SCHOOLS, OKAY? OKAY! This is fine this is fine— 

So I have dubbed the High School mascot of the Sheikah, the Swift Carrot. And although there does seem to be some internal debate about whether the carrot should be replaced by the Fortified Pumpkin, the hero of Hyrule Link favours carrots so that’s that. Then of course, the mascot for the Yiga Clan is the Mighty Banana. The two sides hate each other and steal their food symbols to be petty. I’ll be covering the side quests of Kohga and the other later characters in another later post, but just know that Kohga will have his banana heist sidequest too. 

So anyhow, you play as Impa. Maybe she can say a piece of dialogue or two about how she has to uphold the image of her people as she has to lead them one day. And then, this side quest is just her retrieving the carrots and running off with the Yiga’s big banana supply before she’s caught. This is based on that “Escape the Yiga Clan” quest if you couldn’t tell.

Custom gambit defeat of Impa vs Kohga: On one hand I think it would be badass to see Impa’s Sheikah skills go up against the Yiga Clan tactics. Kohga summons a giant metal ball to throw, Impa teleports behind him “nothing personal, kid” nO fuck I’m doing it again away goes to swing a blade at his face. He blocks it with his little energy shield thing, but not before an entire conga line of Impa clones start slashing at him until he’s defeated by a giant explosion. So yeah, that’d be badass and cool. But on the other hand…

Kohga, stomping his feet and having a fit: I cARROT believe you would do something this terrible! Give us back those bananas right now! D: ….please? You can keep the gross orange sticks.

Sooga: He asked nicely. You wouldn’t deny the wishes of the most polite and charming Yiga Chief there is, would you?

Impa: No can do, Yiga scum! I’m afraid this cruel action wasn’t veggie nice of you so I must exact justice! Now it’s my time to split. *Impa clones gather and throw Kohga into a giant frog’s mouth. Impa runs off with a sack of fruit [fruit (derogatory) if you will] cackling into the horizon*

Zelda: The Path She Laid For You

The King has order Zelda to head to the Temple of Time, in order to see if anything there could help awaken her powers. Zelda sets off quietly, with minimal company, as not to attract too much attention lest the Town’s folk be hit with another attack. It seems, however, that these precautions won’t be enough...Defeat key enemies

So this is a pure Zelda sidequest, with no other characters except for eggbot because I said so. Starts out normal when SURPRISE! Bunch of monsters appear and Zelda has to whip out her iphone and fight them. 

Also!! Good time for the Hollows to show up, and you know, tell her what a failure she is and all that. Convince her that she's useless and gonna doom everyone. All that good stuff!! It’s just nice to catch up with the villains and see how they’re doing, you know? ‘Sup Hollow Urbosa, last I saw you were barely spitting words in the Lost Woods, and now you’re giving full hard-hitting insults to Zelda’s character and ability? Good for you, Queen, good for you.

So Zelda and a handful of guards are fighting off monsters, and Zelda has to beat the Hollows too. Her gambit dialogue when she defeats Hollows can be stuff like “You’re not the real ___” or something idk, I don’t have a lot of experience with the evil clone trope, I’ve never played Ocarina of Time. But one specific I DO want to highlight is that Zelda uses the nearby Sheikah Tech to defeat the enemies. I find it a bit weird how Zelda just knows how to use those random water canons in the Faron region in later chapters, so we’re just gonna at least set up a pattern so that it makes a bit more sense later. Plus! This is in front of the Great Plateau, AKA Gate Post Town/Garrisons AKA oh lOOK it’s that area where Link and Impa and eggbot first meet in that Impa introduction scene of my rewrite so we have already established that Sheikah Technology is being stored here and ready to use! Continuity in world building! Nice.

So Zelda uses her knowledge of Sheikah Tech to defeat the Hollows, when...dun dun dun! Astor appears. But you don’t fight him...

Astor: Have you listened to one word spoken to you today? Why are you still resisting? Let me help you.

Zelda: And what exactly is your plan? You wish to kill me, then?

Astor: Not quite. I mean, if you do die, there are ways I can manage, so if some stray Yiga blade happens to strike you I’m not completely doomed.

Astor: But no, the most optimal outcome for everyone is the one where you live yet. You must see the truth as I do, and let me fix this. I can undo this terrible knot destiny has thread for you. [and insert other fate sisters and sewing metaphors here]

Zelda: But how? What’s your game here, if you’re truly claiming to be in everyone’s best interest then why all this secrecy?

Astor: Ah...ever the one to look for the facts and logic, hmm? Can’t blame you, you get it straight from your mother.

Zelda: …!

Astor: But...I’m afraid even if I did tell you now, you’re in no state to truly grasp it. No...the only way this works is for you to truly understand the position you're in, and the stakes that hang in the path before you. 

Astor: And if I have to kill every King, Champion, or knight to get you to understand…

Astor: Then so be it. 

[dun dun dun]

Zelda: No! I won’t let you hurt anyone, I swear it!

Eggbot [just pretend eggbot can have dialogue boxes too]: *chirps* 

Astor, suddenly noticing eggbot: ...You…you’re one thing I still don’t—

Eggbot chirps again beside Zelda, both seeming to be angry at Astor’s words. Eggbot releases a glowing flash of light. Kinda like a...flash bang? [is that the right word idk]

Astor: Ah—! *and he teleports away to escape* Astor: Until next time then...Princess

And that’s pretty much the sidequest. Zelda can question what exactly eggbot did, but he’s not exactly the most verbal in responses. Finally it ends with Zelda going home, “He was still right though...I’m still sitting in failure, with not a hint of my powers awakening. All I have is some Sheikah tech, some exhausted shoulders….and well, you, I suppose, little one.”

“Come, it’d be a waste to continue forth in this condition. Let’s go back to the castle.”

Eggbot: *happy whistles and chirps*

= = = = = 

Tune in next time folks, as we dive back into the main event! Needless to say, Chapter 4 is where the shit starts to go down...

[love4hobi]

hi!! please feel free to not reply because i just wanted to let you know how glad i am that you spoke about that weverse article because i saw people use it basically just to criticize people who were dissatisfied with ptd

ptd was bad production and im glad the members’ names arent on it. how did we even go from music tailored to the members to shoehorning rapline into 10 seconds each.

but then again whenever i come across the “this doesnt sound like bangtan” point i feel like, bangtan has never had a consistent sound besides songs which work very well with the members themselves? the school trilogy hyyh wings ly mots and now this trilogy most of them sound nothing like eachother and each era there was always a good chunk of the fandom saying wow sellouts their sound has changed. feels like this time it’s just that hybe isnt even choosing music that truly fits them so they can reach wider audiences

and considering that their next comeback is probably going to be the collab they keep hinting at im not expecting a massive shift from the trajectory they are on. like come on hybe do your biggest group justice

hi! yea it is weird the way some people dont think critically about what they read in the weverse articles as if hybe doesnt make them say exactly what they want it to say and use it to try to further manipulate bts’ fanbase, to try to motivate them to stream or whatever it is they want. and i agree with you that bts music has always been changing and no two albums sound the same, but still theres something about all their work up until mots persona that just Feels like them. i dunno how to describe it its just like their recent stuff is so generic it could be anyones, but their older stuff is Theirs u kno. but yea for some reason they dont care about that anymore n its sad. n omg i completely forgot about the coldplay collab ughh not looking forward to that personally,, one reason being i think i already know what the line distribution will look like.. among other things… its like i get theyre clearly just in it for the money at this point, because even tho theyve gotten so big, under capitalism if ur not constantly growing ur failing,, but i truly honestly believe that they would be just as, if not more successful than they are now if they just let the boys do what they genuinely wanted to do. its like they havent stopped to think that maybe the western industry that they so desperately want the attention of would be a little more welcoming to them if they felt all that drive and passion and sincerity from just a few years back….

[rickriordanfandam]

opinions on riordanverse ; my edition

a lot of people have been doing this so i decided why not right. probably gna lose some followers or smth but anyways. pls respect my opinions! if u disagree, thats fine, but please be polite. unless any of my opinions strikes u as morally wrong then pls point it out to me respectfully. thanks!

- i actually liked drew. im so sorry to everyone who hates her but full offence, why. think about it this way ok, first of all drew became hc because silena died. silena was the traitor, the one who betrayed chb, yet after she died campers celebrated her as a hero? and then drew suddenly has to replace her and live up to idk that legacy she left behind,, when all of a sudden this girl named piper swoops in and takes her place. idk abt u but i wld be salty abt that too. not only that, but as an asian, the chances of drew having faced racism/bullying as a child is pretty high (she studies at brooklyn academy). which means that when she finds out shes a demigod, and arrives at chb where most of the campers are white (this is an assumption btw), she’d obviously be scared of being bullied for her skin color right?? so the first thing she wld do before the campers get to bully her is to bully them before they can do so. (sentence structure here is wack i apologize) ofc this might not even have happened, drew could have had a perfect childhood && was a b1tch for no reason, BUT EVEN THEN HER ROLE AS A BULLY WAS PRETTY VITAL BECAUSE THAT FURTHER SHOWED THE CONTRAST BETWEEN HER AND PIPER,, HIGHLIGHTING PIPER AS A HERO//GOOD CHARACTER,, AND THEREFORE MAKING READERS LIKE PIPER MORE. anyway stop hating on drew please. ALSO WHY IS THIS SO LONGA SDFJHG

- jason isnt bland, the fandom just kinda erased his backstory (thanks to @pjohoo-memes for the phrasing lol)

- reynabeth wouldnt have lasted/would have broken up several times. idk i just see them as two extremely powerful characters who have firm opinions and will definitely clash at some point. in a platonic relationship,, i can see them as really good friends but as lovers? idk i just think theyll break up

- PIPABETH

- i dont really like jercy,, i see them as better friends than lovers. also idt jason and percy were that close..?

- the dam and not my type jokes are srsly cringey and were never funny. ik that seems hypocritical since my username literally makes use of the dam joke but honestly i dont actually like the joke. its not funny to me and has never been funny

- the seven were not best friends. they definitely argued,, and honestly probably werent as close as the fandom makes them seem. like ure dumped with 6 other people, out of which u only know a few. my introverted ass would have jumped off the argo 2 quicker than leo valdez could bomb camp jupiter up. also leo was a dick to frank. so what if frank is bigger sized?? thats not a valid reason to tease him

- the fandom needs to stop hating on octavian while worshipping luke. if u hate luke and u say u hate octavian too, then okay. but if u tell me ure a luke stan but u despise octavian?? imma disagree w u. luke was worse than octavian im sorry. first of all, octavian being a dick was kinda justified. hes been after the praetor position for so long, and everyone keeps saying to “wait for jason” when suddenly this dude, whos a son of NEPTUNE (neptune wasnt liked much by romans), and the camp decides to make him praetor?? dude i would be pissed off big time. and then afterwards, he finds out that greek demigods are real and the dude they made praetor is greek. AND THEN GREEK DEMIGODS COME TO CJ AND ONE OF THEM BOMB IT UP?? octavian has been told all his life that greeks are scum and this dude called leo valdez attacks cj. sure it was an accident, but did octavian know that? no. so it was honestly justified that he was such a salty prick im just saying. also some of yall be hating on octavian for cutting a teddy bear open and thats the funniest shit ive ever heard i swear 

- luke didnt go to elysium

- travis and connor stoll r way too underrated. the two have been head counselors of the hermes cabin since luke was revealed as a traitor, can u imagine the stress? luke, the person they probably looked up to as a brother, betrayed them. and they didnt even have time to process this when they were  thrown the roles of being hcs. that would have been so stressful and i would probably have broken down if i were them. the stoll brothers taking turns to wake up at ungodly hours because a new camper is crying and homesick and terrified, the stoll brothers having to comfort and take care of new campers, having to deal with the amount of people in that cramped space because not enough campers are being claimed fast enough. having to resolve issues between campers in the hermes cabin all the time. the stolls arent just comedic relief, and we need to stop treating them as such

- tratie shldve been canon idc idc

- demigods of the demeter cabin arent talked about enough and i love the fact that meg was demeters kid. like she isnt the child of one of the big three yet shes so powerful.

- we need to hype clarisse up more her character arc was phucking amazing 

- rachel is overhated. sis found out greek gods exist and regularly come down to earth to fuck around and went “ok cool”. queen shit behavior methinks

- the floor 19 crew of mcga is srsly underrated. like do u even remember halfborn gunderson, mallory keen, tj, etc??? bc i feel like we only remember samirah, magnus, alex, and sometimes blitz and hearthstone

- sadie (tkc) was kinda annoying at first. i like her more now tho but i rmb not liking her for a phat while

- tkc and mcga need more love

- carter kane and jason grace arent boring. theyre just really sweet boys who are too good for this world and yes yes yes 

- hazel and frank (especially frank) need to be hyped up more. i hardly ever see anything about them. also yall seem to forget that frank was literally made praetor and that even hecate admired hazel and was willing to fight beside her because of how powerful she was

- frazels age gap is kinda sketch but i still think theyre really cute

- nico definitely had trauma from going to tartarus on his own

- GROVER IS PERCYS BEST FRIEND

- annabeth isnt smarter than leo but neither is leo smarter than annabeth. ive seen a lot of discussions about who is smarter and heres my hot take on it: neither. theyre equally smart, just in different ways. leos a genius mathematically speaking. he has no issues solving math problems meant for people much, much older than him. annabeth on the otherhand, is great at strategies etc. she can make an army of 1000 more powerful than the enemy, even if theyre outnumbered. so in my opinion, both are equally as smart//u cant compare their intelligence, because their talents lie in two different areas.

- while i do agree rick riordan isnt a god and that hes bound to make mistakes,, AND that hes given us a lot of representation,, if the representation offends the people its sposed to represent, then theres a problem. im talking about piper as a poc and wearing feathers in her hair. im not a poc, so i cant speak for them on whether or not its wrong, because i dont know either. HOWEVER, i have seen multiple posts BY pocs talking about how they didnt really like rick’s representation of piper, and thats an issue. pocs have been and are still oppressed and discriminated against by many. as a white cis man, we cant really blame him for not knowing (tho he could have done a research,, asked some pocs,, idk), but by representing pocs in that manner, hes influencing impressionable kids/teens into thinking “oh pocs wear feathers in their hair all the time” etc, which isnt true. the pjo/hoo series is extremely successful, and kids who read the books will probably start forming inaccurate opinions on pocs. the amount of fan art that depicts piper with feathers in her hair dont help either. “but rick said so in the books, so its canon” yeah well rick isnt a god and he can get some things wrong at times. im not saying we should cancel him, im saying we should start educating ourselves and not spread false info like pocs wearing feathers in their hair all the time. also that snake song shit where she sang Summertime was just- yeah. bc heres the thing you can be racist, and still include minorities, but portray them in a racist way. And even then, ignorance isn't a thing to admire. Getting those facts wrong still has a major impact. It continues to perpetuate racist stereotypes.

“ With the feather thing, I looked it up myself; it takes less than five minutes to figure out that Cherokees don't braid feathers into their hair. I didn't grow up in the country where my parents are from. I have many other first/second generation American friends who have also been through that, with a bit of a disconnect from their culture. But something that most of us have in common is that when we didn't know something, and when our parents weren't that big of a help, we looked it up. We sought out resources online and through other people from our culture to be able to connect more with where we came from. Some of that took a Google search. So I find it hard to believe that Piper, a girl who Rick's trying to portray as someone who is attempting to connect with her culture and is totally against racist stereotypes, wouldn't know that eagle feathers aren't supposed to be braided into your hair casually. She may be disconnected from her culture, but she's also shown to want to connect back to it. Piper wouldn't be casually braiding feathers into her hair while also telling off people for being racist. It makes no sense.” - reddit thread (down below) 

for those of yall who wanna know more please please read this, it has a lot of things i wanna add in here : https://www.reddit.com/r/camphalfblood/comments/gy3gl2/piper_mcleans_portrayal_is_innacurate/ 

as well as https://finding-my-culture.tumblr.com/post/189422373260/maxie-ratties-and-cattie-finding-my-culture 

i will be posting screenshots of these in future posts so if ure viewing this on ig and u dont have tumblr,, dont worry 

- the fact that most of the strong female characters in the series refuse to be “girly”, and ngl i dont really like that. just because ure girly doesnt mean u cant be strong. 

- piper would have been a great way for him to start making the strong characters act girlier, but instead he went with the “I’m not like other girls” trope which is quite obnoxious to hear constantly, and I don’t think it’s necessarily great for younger girls to read that idea growing up.  the closest we've ever had to a strong female character who was also into "girly" things was Silena. when I was younger I admired Piper's "I'm not like other girls" thing, but then I got older and realized that the whole mentality of "not like other girls" is super obnoxious, and a little bit toxic

i have a heck load more that i cant rmb rn but yeah feel free to add more 

[theunconcernedembalmer]

Toko! I was thinking of creating an ask the character blog for IDV or Genshin Impact and wanted a few tips on how to start off. Anything you can share?

ey yo my dude!! thank you so much for this question, now im lowkey tempted (again) to make a genshin ask blog sjadhlkshgkahshglsaj anyway my 1.5 cents is under the cut, yall know how much i talk here HAHAHAHAH

uhhhhhh so i guess we start with picking a character u really Vibe with tm? I KNOW THIS SOUNDS LIKE COMMON SENSE BUT LIKE ive been considering making a genshin ask blog for a while now but i never really got to it cos i couldnt really decide on a character (plus the fact that their outfits are. so intricate. is also a hmm since i try to follow details to a t) (at first i wanted to do zhongli, but i feel like to be able to muse him well u need to know the lore super super well, which i dont n im too lazy to research on that aha. n u know how much i respect characterizations, especially for such a complex character like him. i also considered xiangling for a period of time mostly for guoba but also like i have 2+1 blogs here n having one more might not be a very good idea aha) (as for aesop he was my Hyperfixation Character tm also cos i looked at his kit n went Yep i could work with this. probably)

so assuming ur not a dumbass like me n u kinda know who u wanna pick, id actually say to snoop around here for other ask blogs n kinda get a feel of the... scene? is that the word? or like u know, other blogs that u can potentially vibe with. ive run a couple of ask blogs before this current one (both that have died for different reasons) n from my experience interacting with other blogs (if theyre okay with it, i think most should be) is pretty fun. it also kinda helps get ur blog around to other ppl on other blogs so they can go Oh whats this cool shit n check u out, n its also a reason why we kinda reblog promo posts for other blogs (also cos we’re always excited when someone new comes on, its really the more the merrier. we see all :eyes:). interacting with other blogs is also an option when ur inbox is looking real roomy too

another reason why i havent exactly done a genshin blog is that idk i cant actually seem to find genshin ask blogs around (i have seen rp blogs, or those that answer asks with mostly text instead of art, but thats. not my thing since i hate my own writing aha) (i did find one aether blog some time ago, but for some reason i hardly see them around anymore??? idk man i might be wrong). its not like im trying super hard to find them ask blogs, so im sure they exist out there (hopefully?? im not sure but im being optimistic). i mean theres nothing wrong with just starting an ask blog without others around, but for me i do find a difference when i interact with other ask blogs n when i dont, n i prefer when theres others to have fun with (unfortunately i couldnt find any ask blogs to interact with in my previous fandom. i tried, but the blogs i approached seemed to go inactive shortly afterwards...) plus u get to meet friends that way too :D (i made a lot of friends via idv askblogs n its really been a joy vibing with others)

as for the idv scene. gestures around me. unfortunately there are a lot of ask blogs that arent that active anymore, but theres still some of us who are alive n kicking empty inboxes, n im sure everyone would love to see a new face around. winks at u. also there seems to be a lot more blogs popping up lately, which is really heartening to see.

then u kinda just. make ur blog? n a starting introduction post so ppl can reblog it n spread the word XD n yay u have a blog i guess??? XD

i gotta say tho. dont expect ur blog to take off immediately (especially for smaller fandoms like idv, tvbh i didnt think my blog would even get half this far when i started cos of how non existent idv tumblr seemed to be) n ur inbox will probably be looking pretty empty a lot of the time (or at least filled with some that u havent quite thought of how to reply to yet aha) (but also like empty inboxes happen pretty often, im sure most of us here have experienced this problem)

in the case of the first ask blog i ever started, it never really took off at all. ngl it was kind of demoralizing n depressing but to be fair i had picked one of the more obscure characters in the series, so obscure that many ppl in the fandom would have never heard of this character before. if u wanted to know, i took a character that only appeared in the 2nd musical of the series, who also made a very brief cameo in the manga to acknowledge his existence within that universe. thats how obscure my character was, but i went with him purely because he was my favourite character. i will say though i did enjoy it while it lasted n i learnt a lot from the experience, n i think thats whats important really.

i guess this kinda leads on (not really but let me digress) to the whole uhhhh thing where if u choose a more popular character, u get more attention. which is fine i guess? if u really vibe with the character, i mean theyre popular for a reason. n choosing a more popular fandom (like genshin) would objectively also get u more viewers n numbers. but like honestly i believe that ask blogs are meant for u to have fun with, n like trying to get popular gets tiring pretty fast (this shouldnt be like a main goal, but u know sometimes u subconsciously also want that gucci follower count n bomb ass notes or something. i used to be guilty of this until i realized it isnt worth it) especially if ur not enjoying yourself in the process. (case in point: my previous fandom was considerably larger n my blog got about 700 followers within a year or so, but it got very tiring n stressful to maintain after my interest in it died, n no one was really interacting with the blog even though i tried which kinda made it even more depressing despite the so called success n popularity of the blog)

anyway on a less serious note, theres a lot of fun stuff u can do with the ask blog, like some ask blogs have really fancy tags that i really like n try to do but also like not really HAHAHAHA. i kinda just channel what i want to see in an ask blog into my own ask blogs (good art is one, i try very hard for it to be good :,DD another is characterization, n others is just extra miscellaneous arts n stuffs like au ideas or memes. these are also somethings u could work on during ask box downtimes perhaps)

uhhh another side thing is like a posting schedule i guess? like ppl would be more likely to interact (i think) if ur blog is relatively active, n this is usually determined by the last post u made (i think XD). but like generally for blog maintenence id say try to kinda find a frequency that ur comfortable with?? cos i know my once a day posting is kinda insane if i wasnt so hyperfixated on all of this n fight the urge to dump all ur replies when u finish them XD (though ive seen some blogs do that n they do it pretty frequently so its pretty nice to know once u see their post u can spend some time going through the latest batch of posts XD) the queue function is pretty useful here even though i truthfully have never really used it, i kinda just post from my drafts really but it also helps to space out ur content to seem somewhat active especially when u dont have the time to be working on replies sometimes. i hope u know what im trying to say here aha

ANYWAY that was like my 1.5 cents cos i dont even think its worth 2 cents HAHAHAHAH these are just my thoughts from running all my blogs up till now, some that are still running n the others that have just died a natural death. i wouldnt actually delete them (theyre still around actually XD) cos theyre kinda like archives n i can look back at what i did last time. cos ngl i made some high quality stuff back then, n i dont even know how i managed to do that aldhflhdsgk. also ppl do look at archive blogs every now n then for the content thats there yknow

BUT YES anyway if u do decide to join the idv ask blogs hmu, ill be sure to give u a lil shoutout here. winks

[funky-furby]

rough furby fandom timeline

reminiscencing abt old furblr made me wanna revisit some of the changes we’ve seen over time! to give new people an idea of it, and also to spark discussion with older members, i joined in 2017 and i havent been as active as of 2019 so i cant speak of prior or after, but heres my thoughts

2017

fandom is still small, but growing

focus is on them as toys

lots of posts are guides on names of colors, or how to push start

2005s are not very popular, i saw someone struggle to sell 2 working ones just because their beaks were damaged

besides the pink ones, people really liked those

i also lost a bid war on an orange 2005 that ended up going for 50 bucks, do you  understand the regret i feel

lots of furbys are cheap, furbys in general are cheap, besides the occasional person thinking their nib snowball is worth 300

rise of furbology (later furbae)

popular for owning a lot of furbys, and owning a very very roughed up frog furby called swampy

theres discourse abt drawing furbys with 4 feet

small nature of fandom means that discourse usually involves people everyone knows directly (furbyconfessions accidentally contributes to drama but some spin off accounts purposefully try and start it, furby discourse blogs are a thing)

small nature also means that a lot of people remember each others furbys by name

each furby usually has a personality attached to it too, describing things that furby tends  to do more than others, or what its physical differences mean (like being mute)

furby brotherhood is the only furby discord server and it gains notoriety due to the lack of moderation but in my experience it was a really fun wild ride

customization is fairly limited to maybe drawing on freckles, accessories, eyechips (people were poking them out with needles), to my knowledge tracer was the first popular furby to have further customizing

furby blogs humour is very silly, lots of piss and vore jokes

customized furbys from ebay sellers are pretty widely disliked, usually because theyre the clay ones, or because theres a lady trying to pass off her customs as rare releases that never happened

people go out of their way to help each other  find listings for their dreamies

2018

purity culture? in furblr? since a lot of people use furbys to cope (many many posts of people bringing them out in public, describing what  they and their furbys did), theres a pressure for furby blogs to be happy safe places, safefurby tag to avoid swearing and other stuff is started?, and also to avoid hatred in the main tag

theres like, a 70% chance of anyone u interact with in the fandom being a 15 year old trans guy on the autism spectrum, similarities make it really easy to make friends

considering special interests also usually mean wanting to know as much as possible, there is a WELL of information still

rise in popularity also means a lot more information is found abt furbys, like prototypes, a new factory and more obscure merchandise

since a lot of people empathize with  furbys, damaged or not completely working furbys start to go for higher prices than previously as people empathize with them

that one furby that was found in the desert (bumbleweed) gets REALLY popular

rise in customizing coincides with more stylization in how people draw furbys

whenever someone comes up with a new idea u’d see a lot of it in the next week

like stuffing a furby to make them fat, that one took OFF

painting fur and also furby patterns to sew own skins creates a strange demand for  just the furbys faceplate

furbys start to get strange names, like hot  dog water

fall of furbae as shes revealed as a scammer among other reasons

crap ton of new furby discords are started, for specific topics, or just to avoid brotherhood despite them having a completely new mod team (im a little biased)

theres a still a large overlap in furblr with animatronic and other toy robot blogs

an age of really creative stuff tho, content was constantly evolving

oddbodies are a controversial addition to customizing, longfurby wasnt the first, but i do remember a lot of people taking the faces off of plushes and adding a furby face instead

before they were called oddbodies some people were really uncomfortable with them, but people also didnt like their furby friends being tagged bodyhorror, so oddbody was a good compromise

people were calling dibs on listings before, but its more widespread here, even though you cant call dibs on an open listing

furby prices go through the roof oh my god

kid cuisines especially, i saw more than one person pay 600

2005s go up in price too

oddbodies also caused rise in price on furby buddies

2019

mainstream success?

customization and oddbodies seems to the fandoms focus?

customization starts to overtake previous guides to the point where i see newbies struggle to find information

Plushification

First plush ones have clay eyes, later ones add in the eyes of the original furbys

Some controversy over taking apart furbys

popularity from within  and outside of the community further effects prices

since 2012s are both really common, and not popular their prices seem pretty unaffected (besides rainbow crystals)

at this point i think people are taking their furbys out with them less, and i see less people make stories abt what they and their furbys did that day

customization trends were really really cool to watch happen, but since my reasons for being in furblr was the community nature of it, i have a lot less information  for 2019 as i was less active in the fandom

and for 2020, i have nothing! so essentially this is me asking, what was 2019 and 2020 furblr for u like? did i remember any older stuff wrong? whats some stuff u wouldve included or have questions about?

[prompt-master]

Do you have any pet peeves with the fandom itself?

Of course! Who doesn't lmao.

I wish a lot of the fandom would stop calling danganronpa as a whole a terrible game. It is a good series with bad aspects to it! But we like it for a reason! Why write the entire game off as bad writing when clearly something brought you into the fandom. After all the entire game goes off of writing, if you found ANY sort of interest in danganronpa its because of the writing. I feel like calling something you love terrible all the time isn't good for you. You can be critical without hating something you like

I really dislike how fans correct others on the whole "v1" "v2" thing. Its fine to correct fans but i see people go "the V is VERY important to v3!" What are you DOING NOO. Youre calling attention to the plot twist!! The whole point of the v3 plottwist is that the v was very inconspicuous so you have this big moment of realization later on! What i say to explain why the other games are not "v1" ir "v2" is "dr3 is an anime that came out before the third game, so they had to call it version 3 to differenciate" that doesnt call any attention to the v at all and makes sense.

I dislike how the fandom has seemed to fall into the trap many other fandoms do. Which is "if you like this ship/character/headcanon then you're a bad person". Mostly because it tends to be very hypocritical. For example if you say someone cannot like Komaeda because he is a bad person, you're ignoring the fact that EVERY character in danganronpa is at some point a bad person. There are almost no characters that haven't done at least something messed up. Of course its ok to be umcomfortable by a ship, but I don't think its ok to be upset at those who ship it. Esp when you can block the tags

I dislike how the fandom is at each others throats over Fujisaki to the point where people are afraid of gendering them. This is a ten year old discourse...I feel as though we can be more rational in how we respond to it!

This one is super insignificant and means nothing but it kind of annoys me when people call canonically lgbt characters "coded". For example Komaeda is not gay coded, he shows canon explicit and undeniable interest in Hinata. Its ok to say "just because he is interested in guys doesnt mean he ISNT interested in girls" but he isnt gay coded! In fact the only gay coded characters in danganronpa I would say are Ishimaru and Owada (whos success through coding def later booted the canonically lgbt characters to become explicit). Ironically though people call ISHIMONDO canon, when they are actually coded.

Im sure theres a lot more but it likely ties down to my complaints of fandom in general. Such as wishing we could discuss opposing opinions with the intent to understand each other and possibly educate rather than getting hostile.

[biaswreckingfics]

I GOT SO MUCH TO SAYYY!! gosh pls dont find me weird okay, and these are just my personal opinions and im not hating any groups!! but my unpopular opinion is: i think kpop has become very toxic after bts and bp got famous in America. And tbh if you ask me, i wouldnt want any other kpop groups to be famous in America... i only stan exo but i think i speak for all groups when i say they are safe as they are now... of course if exo ever get even more famous i will be happy and proud for their success. But look how fame and America has changed bts and bp... not tryna hate but look theyve changed, idk if anyone else noticed but after fame hits bts, i realised how theyve start to become very...white?? like they are so westernised and like example, they start focusing on America only, they even curse (not a lot but i’d still point out) casually like for example, jungkook singing a curse word in his cover song for jason derulo savage love i think (speaking of cursing, after nct127 got famous in usa mark started getting influenced by them too and he casually cursed like “oh fuck” and everyones like 😃😆) even i curse and im not saying cursing is BADD but yeah i am, and how they sing a whole song in english, not to even mention how toxic america is but in grammys they have sold tons of albums yet they didnt win anything but when they release an english song, they won.

Some half of them americans are very toxic, racist, and just theyre basically acid, like bruh, its evident that once bts got famous there are soooo much hate thrown towards bts too cuz theyre asians, or how some would say theyre gay or look like girls...if my favs (exo) ever get these kinds of treatments (not that they dint but veryy little cuz thank god they ain exposed to the western culture) i will B R E A K, i could never handle that so i would never want that to happen to them. Also noticed how, after bts got famous, most armys are equally as toxic, whether they are just stanning bts just cuz theyre famous there, or like how their fans dont even know anything abt bts and coming after so many groups and their fans. Most of them are fake and i think its cuz of the fame for bts lmao. One thing i’d like to say too tho, is how they are so overrated and their songs are played all the damn time, people would randomly talk abt them, like everywhere you go THEY ARE JUST THERE, like in my opinion if i am an army, i would just feel like they are so common and theres nothing special about them anymore and theres no excitement, like what even is the point anymore. idk if anyone gets me but thats just how i feel about my favs being “wOrLdWiDe fAmOuS”, i will love them and their music but its just something i think about tbh🤷🏻‍♀️ like let me listen to them on my own and vibe and love them, dont play it 24/7 just cuz they are famous and ure tryna get people’s attention, like imagine ure in the subway and u hear ur favs song cuz its EVERYWHERE and ure there like 😐😐 not that u dont love their music but its cuz horrible people dont deserves to listen to their songs, and like people arent going to appreciate them anyway so yeah i feel uncomfortable listening to my favs as others dont even bother, like imagine if that subway is filled with people who are in ur fandom, yall would just hv the best time in the world and VIBE, if not what even is the point. Idk if im explaining it properly, but its badically like, u feeling UNCOMFORTABLE or should i even say SELFISH cuz u do not want to be sharing ur favs with people who dont even deserve to KNOW about them. Basically like seeing how someone you HATE or bullied you back then talking and being all friendly fake with ur BESTEST FRIEND or even boyfriend/girlfriend, cuz u just want to protect them from EVIL (im so dramatic)

And well lastly, no Bts did not paved the way, or “bts is the best and only group” like no, so many amazing artists were breaking records way before bts was even a thing (no hate to bts) but they really need to get slap for having that mindset, they really make a bad image for bts...tbh kpop before was so peaceful (a little toxic but still, compared to now...BYE) and everything was just about idols and fans love, listening and supporting and loving their music and just so comforting... urgh anyway thats all i wanna say and here are some texts i saved relating to kpop groups going famous worldwide uwu

these are also examples, and honestly speaking here, i dont want to be specific as in “exo” cuz i think this happens for ALL the groups out there and the love and relationship between the idols and their fans (family) are just beautiful, but for bts and armys... tbh i feel bad because i just dont see or feel any love they hv for each other (sure we see bts saying i love you armys or armys supporting bts but with all the toxicity in their way, theres just no spark or chemistry or bond no more it’s basically like one direction and their fans and thats all they are, celebrity-fan, but for kpop its family), i can see other groups and their fans interacting or how idols would light up talking abt their fans, but for bts, theres just soooo much mess going on in their fandom its not special anymore, they lost the deep meaning of their group love and IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN IT but YEAH DJSHSKSJ OH and to add somethign else, they got famous in America, look at all the collabs🤡🤡 blackpink with cardi b, bts with nicki etc... not that collabs arent fun... im just saying these american artists... they dont exactly have a good reputation (americans singing about sex (not the good kind), money, girls and drugs) 🥴🥴 dont influenced my faves and let them be exposed to the toxic culture YALL GET ME?? KPOP HAS THE LETTER K FOR A REASON😭😭😭 let them be their own shining star, not everything has to be involved or a part of aMeRiCa to be amazing.... PHEW IVE SAID IT NOW BEFORE ANYONE GETS MAD AT ME, I DONT MEAN TO SOUND RUDE TO YOU, if youre an american and youre no where near being toxic, I LOVE YOU but im just saying, the western culture is toxic and im just saying what ive been observing and noticing🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️ ps: i still love exo till the max and everything about them is perfect and theyre just amazing people (everything i said that bts and armys dont really have anymore, i think thankfully, EXO (sorry im biased) most fandoms still have so much of the L O V E there and i find that extraordinary) and he fandom is so comforting and amazing and idk dkdjjdjss thats why i dont want them getting famous worldwide...sorry exols ANYWAY THATS ALL FOR MY RANT ITS 4AM AND I AM THINKING OF DELETING THIS💀💀💀 anywya sorry for taking up so much space but i just wanna say I FREKAING LOVE NO EXIT, NO LIMITS, basically all ur exo fics cuz why not🥺🥺 i think ur writing skills are amazing as well as the plots and all especially forsaken, and THANK YOU for two bbhxoc fics😭😭😭 i cant!!! also if u reached here idk i-🥲 i hope u didnt get mad or offended 👀

Reply under the cut!!

Kpop has become extremely toxic with the growth of international fans and the rise of 3rd/4th gen. I wasn't around to experience the previous generations, but I know damn well they weren't a mess like these newer ones are.

Gaining fame in America does seem to change idols, and idk why. The group members change and the music changes also. While I do enjoy hearing idols swear (guilty pleasure) and I am an American so I get to enjoy their English songs, I can see how it makes all the other cultures/countries feel some type of way.

I will say this, though, the Grammys are shit and I dont get why people care so much about them. They've proven time and time again the awards don't go to the best artists. However, this doesn't mean that I think BTS deserved a Grammy imo.

Americans are a very toxic and hate filled bunch (again, I am one, so I get to see this shit every day). I 100% know that some of the hate directed towards Asians is because of racism (as seen by the insane uptick in crime against Asian Americans right now) and because some see kpop male idols as too feminine.

BTS is literally everywhere, which is one of the reasons I stopped listening to them tbh. They'd be in commercials, on talk shows, late night shows, in magazines, on the radio, just everywhere. It took the joy out of watching anything from them just because they were always in my face, so I can see what you mean.

I feel like the relationship between BTS and army has changed (from an outsiders perspective). Its no longer about loving and supporting your group and being happy for them. Now, its "so-so wants this? We MUST do everything in our power and spam every possible thing ever so they get what they want". Its almost frightening. They also no longer care about the quality of the music being put out. Doesn't matter what it is, they stream the ever loving shit out of it and make it break records when, honestly, it doesn't deserve to (again imo).

Lastly, I didnt get mad or offended haha. I understand a lot of these viewpoints, and thank you so much for liking my work!! I do wonder what would happen if I made a true BBH centric fic and not just spin offs or continuations of previous works where oc ends up with BBH 🤔🤔 I think that fic would have too much power haha.

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-valves]

Tfp show review!!:

Now that the shows over, let's get to the pros and cons!

Pros!!:

The animation was LOVELY. You hardly see any errors, most you get is the occasional clipping, and even then, they aren't G1 levels of distracting.

The backgrounds and surroundings. Gorgeous.

The fact that this show, while serious, has the capacity for humor, is honestly great. Its very well timed.

Wordplay and puns abound. It's magical, befitting the most daddest of jokes.

The bonds between the humans and their Cybertronian guardians. It felt realistic and genuinely caring.

"I NEEDED THAT!"

Lob ball. Simple, good shit.

The double meaning in episode names. TMI was LITERALLY too much information for Bulkhead.

Starscream's sounds.

Starscreams bullshit.

Starscream's constant need for validation.

Airachnid. Shut up.

The ACTION SCENES. Are the best I've seen in any series. Its realistic, its gorgeous, and no two fighting styles are exactly the same.

The humans are ACTUALLY helpful holy shit. I was shook when they needed the humans in ways that made SENSE.

The different character interactions. From Arcee to Cliffjumper, to Optimus and Dreadwing. So many characters are given thought and interactions. Its lovely.

The poor Steves. Fucking idiots who deserve cookies after fucking up construction.

Soundwave having the only braincell in the decepticons.

Knockout constantly trying to get dicked down.

Slight nods to older generations like g1 and beast wars.

Fowler and June not only being good characters, but capable, with the kids interest in mind.

The fact that you will care. At some point, for some character, you will be attatched to a character. And it WILL fuck you up.

Cybertronian biology and technology. Is so good and satisfying.

Voice acting is 100% on point. You wiill not be disappointed here, especially with Knockout and Starscream.

Theres hand drawn scenes in some cases. They. Are GORGEOUS. Completely.

The constant twists and turns with characters. You are GUARANTEED to be surprised at some point.

Character progression, especially Smokescreen's and Arcee's. So good, SO satisfying.

Cons!!:

The mouth movements sometimes make me REALLY uncomfortable. Like I sometimes want them to shit the hell up with how they move.

Jack. He's just. He's not AWFUL, he's just my least favorite kid, and I hate how he's made to feel so special. Tbh, I think getting rid of him, giving Miko a chance to be mature at times, and just roping June herself as the guiding figure would've been great. In my opinion.

Megatron fucks up his chances of success so often, just because he wants to be a dick. All he had to do was be nice a few fucking times and he might've fucking won the war.

Fuck Silas. I like the whole MECH idea, but Silas just isn't an interesting bad guy to me.

This one is a big ass gripe of mine. Blackarachnia and Breakdown were killed off, purely because they were low on budget. Because they paid the Rock ONCE to voice act. I approve of how they died, they were creative, but the reason as to WHY they had to, was just exhausting to me.

This is a smaller gripe. The theme of this series on the whole is 'find something, cut off decepticons in the meantime, while simultaneously protecting the humans'. Its repeated with different objects. And its not necessarily BAD, it has lots of variety, but it's a small gripe.

Dreadwing. His character was himself was great, but he felt rather wasted. I would've loved for him to join the autobots. Spoilers here, but in the movie, Knockout joins the autobots. It's characteristic of him, sure, but it was kinda...random of Knockout to just join them and not someone like Dreadwing. Him and his brother just felt kinda wasted tbh?

To recap!!:

The gripes i have with this show are minimal. The show, on the whole, is VERY good, very heartfelt, very easy to meme on and laugh about. Its a feel good show, and it was my introduction to this fandom. On the whole? 9/10!

[yoonminist]

I understand why people are upset but armys urgently NEED to stop the sheep mentality. A good number of us has known about the sample since the snippet in the movie. Its use was analyzed and theorized w/ hundreds of rts. It was known and it was a non issue bc guess what? Rappers BEEN doing this (see K Lamar). JJ was anti korean and the sample was obvs intentionally used as a ironic device if you care to read the lyrics and look at the song in its context. Too much noise abt this and not on BLM

+ due to how people are scrambling to cancel yg for this, an official address is likely to be posted but i urge all armys to THINK before they act. We’re a big fandom and things turn ugly quickly so we HAVE to be responsible while consuming media. WDYT talks about hate received from people who were mindlessly following media rumours, like cult members follow a false narrative. Maybe thats not the reason but the link is there and it scare me that so called fans were so fast to turn against him.

I feel like he might have used it on purpose... the concept was that agust d was a mad king, j* j* was a cult leader, it talks about adoration and stuff so idk :( I'm pretty upset but I wanna hear what he has to say about it too, rappers are known for terrible takes like this so I wouldn't be surprised if he thought nothing of it as a rapper...

Is it too edgy to say that I actually think that's kind of brilliant? Because I interpreted the song to be about blindly following society and not questioning anything and so for Yoongi to reference a famous c*lt l**d*r seemed like an intelligent artistic decision (but I am admittedly biased)

theres a thread by @elliotsang that tries to explain why yoongi mightve done this and some of it makes sense but i really do think he couldve gone about that in a COMPLETELY different way :(( i hope he addresses this and grows from it all especially w whats happening rn :(

the sample kendrick used was actually anti black though,, listen i love yoongi but i’m seeing this thread saying that jim jones was anti korean and in the song yoongi boasts about being a successful korean guy in a korean group BUT did he actually have any korean victims?? or is the part of the sample he used specifically anti korean?? people are bringing it up now because hundreds of his victims were black so it IS a blm issue and i know armys like to analyse things but sometimes we can’t analyse every single issue away and we Can ask for clarification especially in a situation like this,, and i know antis are going to jump on this harder than anyone else but if he messed up he messed up;;;