#like the ketchup incident

[captain-krow-drozdov]

Gods Below I Need To Sleep, I Just Read That The Peach Tea I've Been Drinking Is Good For Bone Health And I Muttered Out Loud "Ah That's Good I Need More Bones."

[egophiliac]

I love your take on Crowley!

I know that the early, non-Diasomnia stories aren't really your thing, but are you reading the novels at all?

I have been following some of the fan translations and the second book seems intense! Would love to hear what you think about them.

thank you! 💚💚💚 I'm not really sure why you think I don't like the earlier arcs though, I love pretty much all the characters and their storis! (I think 5 and 1 are my favorite of the past episodes, though 6 infected me with the Shroud brainrot something fierce.) I just...ESPECIALLY love diasomnia. :') but there is room in my heart for all of these dweebs! like, who among us is not just as ride-or-die for Adeuce as they are for us.

that said, I don't really follow the other adaptations like the manga (aside from a dip-in just to see the new Yuus) or the novels, though I keep meaning to check them out! I do like seeing the differences between the different forms of media, and how certain things get adapted one way or another! but alas, time/a lack of accessibility stands in our way more often than not. :( someday...someday I will have time to consume all of the media...

[kindahoping4forever]

Hi😊 I hope you're doing well and the show wasn't too hard on your health♥️ Would love to hear about your time at the forum if you'd like to tell😊

It's so nice of you to check in like this, thank you! 🥰 Honestly, just about every health issue I have decided to flare in the weeks leading up to the show, so I was fairly nervous going into it, but it all actually went really well! (Of course, my body essentially insisted I go into hibernation the entire week after the show but that was inevitable tbh 😅)

The night started off a little iffy when I was waiting for my brother by a concession stand and a passerby stepped on a stray ketchup packet and it exploded all over my legs and bags. 😃 But after a brief pity party and an emergency purchase of unnecessarily expensive bottled water (crazy long bathroom lines limited my options), I got myself cleaned up enough to appreciate the humor of literally getting sauced at The 5SOS Show. 😌 (Sadly, that particular shirt was already sold out or else I would've got it to commemorate lol)

But except for that unexpected moment, it was a fantastic evening! I won't go into details about the show so that I don't have to spoiler tag this post (🥲) but I had the most amazing time. Even though I've obviously been following the tour online, there's really nothing like experiencing it firsthand and I still found myself floored by certain moments.

I'm always happy to see 5SOS but I suppose because of the uncertainty I felt leading up to this particular show, I just remember feeling so, so grateful to be there. Overwhelming bursts of gratitude and joy to the point of tears a couple times, which is crazy because I am far from a soft girlie. It was just a really beautiful experience and I'm so thankful to have had it! 💙

[loveofmylouis]

.

[bifbm]

Bats and their least favourite Rogues to deal with (other than Joker of course)

Bruce hates dealing with Two-Face, mostly because of knowing and valuing Harvey as a friend and he feels a sense of guilt that he wasn't able to save the man.

Damian does not enjoy fighting Poison Ivy as he actually agrees with many of her ideologies, and cannot always fully convince himself she's not going about it the right way. Ivy knows this and loves to use it against him. Damian is also not fond of her cuddle pollen as it allows his overbearing older brother to latch onto him like the limpet he is with a viable excuse.

Tim HATES Hatter. Losing control of your mind is basically Tim's worst nightmare. The Joker Junior incident only adds fuel to his mind control terrors. Whenever Hatter gets out the rest of the family has to keep an extra close eye on Tim who tends to give up sleeping in order to put Hatter back in Arkham.

Scarecrow is the least favourite of both Dick and Jason. Although every member of the batfam have their fair share of traumatic memories, Dick and Jason always find reliving theirs hardest to shake off. Any loud thumps after set both of them off, Dick thinking yet another person has hit the floor and Jason thinking it was yet another strike of the crowbar.

Stephanie is terrified of Professor Pyg. He is not as loud and demanding of attention as the rest of the Rogues so the others never consider him as the worst but there is something about him that makes her absolutely sick to her stomach. She's had one close encounter with him and never wants to see him again. If she's a little quick to let someone else take a case that may involve him that's nobody else's business but hers.

Cass is not a fan of Riddler. She is the least equipped to deal with his games as she cannot fully grasp the double meanings of many English words and Riddler has very confusing body language to read. Cass does not like feeling useless and Riddler is terrifying in his own right so being completely unequipped to stop him is not something she enjoys.

Duke hates Condiment King. And Kite Man. Such B-list villains but of course with his luck they always escape on the day shift. Mustard and ketchup are incredibly difficult to get out of the cracks in his armour and Kite Man is annoying and has an unfortunate habit of picking him up and DROPPING HIM. Duke's over it.

[teambyler]

Will said he's "not gonna fall in love" EXACTLY when he does something referring to Mike:

I'm late to Byler (just watched s4 a month ago and found y'all after), and I'm guessing some caught that Will opened a bottle of syrup in front of his plate which has eggs, and Mike definitely liked syrup on his eggs in s1.

But has anyone pointed out the IRONY of Will saying "I'm not gonna fall in love" EXACTLY when he gets the syrup? The creators must have known eagle-eyed viewers would remember s1 Mike grossing out his sister with this.

So Will said "I'm not gonna fall in love," while we're all reminded of someone he's already in love with. But not only that: syrup on eggs is an unusual preference he seems to share with the boy he loves. Which symbolically suggests they're meant for each other.

(Yes, I know Will has pancakes there, but we all know you put ketchup on eggs lol. And he starts eating with just the syrup!)

The creators SO wanted him to say this line while unscrewing the cap that they made a continuity error. In the IMMEDIATE previous shot, Will had already unscrewed the cap:

So the timing was deliberate.

And we all remember the very gay-coded Mike Tries Fruit on Pizza Incident. To which I'll point out:

Syrup on eggs = Fruit on pizza

Syrup and fruit both add sweetness to an otherwise starchy food. Just like being queer, some people instantly find the IDEA of it repulsive (Mike's sister called the syrup "disgusting"). But others find it delicious!

And it's canon that Mike has always liked sugar on his starch ;)

Mike didn't want to try fruit on pizza. "Fruit" is historically a derogatory word for gay men. He called fruit on pizza "blasphemous." His friends had to coax him to try sugar on his starch, which he always liked.

Afterward, Mike says off-camera that he liked his fruity pizza (screencap with subtitle):

Oh, Mike, you just had to try it! And what's the harm in telling Will you like him? He just might like sugar on his starch as well!

"Try before you deny" indeed!

-teambyler

[collecting-stories]

Blueberry BBQ - Carmen Berzatto

Request: no.

Summary: reader works at The Bear balancing their books and has a major crush on Carmy but they never talk aside from business. A dinner party brings them closer together.

A/N: Just some nonsensical drabble cause I love Carmy.

The Bear Masterlist

✳︎ ✳︎ ✳︎ ✳︎

“Are you making that bbq sauce for the burgers this time?” Marcus asked, turning away from his chocolate cake for a split second to look at you.  

Mikey had hired you a week before he died to help balance the books at the Beef. After he was gone Richie stuck you on the counter, waiting on customers like you didn’t have a bachelors in finance, and telling you not to go in the back office. Now that Carmy was around, and attempting to make the Beef float, you were back were you belonged, in the office and away from the hustle and bustle of the kitchen.  

You were no chef…you’d hesitate to even really call yourself a proper cook…but you knew what you liked and you knew how to make it taste good. “I don’t know…last time Angel complained.”  

“That’s because Angel puts ketchup on everything like a five year old,” Tina called from her station, the distinct chop of onions echoing after her comment.  

“What are you making?” Syd asked, adding a quick, “behind” as she passed Tina to grab a pot.  

“It’s Sunday night dinner,” Marcus replied, ignoring the headshake Tina gave him. No real offence to Sydney but you knew she’d tell Carmy and whether or not he actually would come, you kind of didn’t want the pressure of thinking he might show up. Even with your job at The Beef you were far from understanding the “food world” but you’d tried Carmy’s cooking a few times and it was leagues better than anything you attempted on a good day. There was no way you wanted him even thinking you set foot in a kitchen, let alone trying something you made.  

“Sunday night dinner?” Syd echoed.  

And then the cursed, “what’s Sunday night dinner?” Carmy’s voice. He’d come in from a smoke break and you took three large steps back to the office, as if you hadn’t set foot in the kitchen to begin with. Marcus looked at his boss and then at you (wide eyed and trying not to visibly shake your head at him) and then back to Carmy.  

“It’s uh,”  

“Nothing.” Tina cut in. “It’s nothing. Get back to work eh, Jeff?”  

“Yeah,” Carmy looked like he wanted to say something else but instead just nodded, blue eyes a little glazed, “yeah.”  

In the comfort of the office, you get back to work on payroll for the week, slipping your airpods in to drown out the sounds of the kitchen. Just over the softer lull of Evermore you could hear Carmy yell at Richie, his brother’s best friend shouting right back. It wasn’t always (or ever) the best environment for working but you liked it. You liked it when Mike was working there and you somehow managed to like it a little more now that Carmy was running the show, though that could just be that you liked Carmy. Outside of work, you didn’t have too many conversations but he was pretty to look at and you liked the brief interactions the two of you had, even if it was just asking about accounts and other boring stuff he didn’t have the patience for on his own.  

The whole incident (that might be an over exaggeration of the event though you’d honestly be tempted to call it a debacle and it probably wasn’t that either) had been mostly forgotten by the time the dinner rush was rolling around and you were clocking out. More than thrilled to both be home before dark and to continue your mostly Carmy-free shift. He was so busy out in the kitchen and fighting with Richie that you hadn’t seen him. Though by now you were positive he had forgotten the mention of Sunday night dinner.  

You waved to Syd, promised to text Marcus, and slipped out the back door into the alley. If you went out the front Richie would stop you and then you’d be listening to his bullshit for another hour (at least).  

“Sneaking out?” Carmy’s tone was teasing and you spun around to find him sitting on a milk crate, smoking what was probably his sixth or seventh cigarette of the day.  

“Didn’t wanna hear about Richie’s date,” you shrugged, the strap of your backpack digging at your collar momentarily when your shoulder went up and then dropped back into place.  

“It was a bust.” 

You nodded, “kinda feel bad for him,” you mused. You didn’t hate Richie, in fact you found him kind of funny. Even when he’d kicked you out of the office and relegated you to the counter you’d liked him too much to complain.  

“You wanna date him?” Carmy asked, raising a brow as if he was issuing some kind of challenge.  

“Oh, I don’t feel that bad.” You laughed.  

Carmy smiled and you were ready to say goodnight when he opened his mouth again. Maybe you should have gone the front way. “So what’s this Sunday night dinner?”  

You shook your head as if the whole ordeal wasn’t that major to begin with. Maybe if it sounded lame, if you sounded like you weren’t that bothered with it, Carmy wouldn’t want to go. Not that you thought he wanted to spend his time off the clock hanging out with you. “Oh it’s nothing, I’m just…making dinner for like, Marcus and Tina and everybody.” 

He frowned. An actual, eyebrows scrunched, hooded eyes drooped, frown. “You cook?”  

“Not, no, not like…I mean…it’s probably cardboard compared to you.” You laugh, “not that I’m, ya know…comparing myself to you or anything.” You replied, stumbling slightly over your words.  

“Must be pretty good…everybody’s going.”  

“Well, anyone’s invited…I mean, if you wanted to come you could. I think Marcus is bringing some dessert and Tina and Ebraheim usually bring something too.” You shrugged again, an impulsive movement as you tried to make yourself sound cool and collected. It was just Carmy…the guy looked like he was homeless, he shouldn’t be as intimidating as he was.  

“What are you making?”  

“It’s just burgers.” You replied, downplaying the fact that you’d specifically overpaid for waygu beef because Marcus claimed it tasted better. Who were you to know. 

“I’ll bring something.” The offer sounded more like a sure statement. Not only would he be there but he would bring something.  

“Okay…” you trailed off, “well, see you tomorrow.” 

You were pretty sure you’d never left The Beef so quickly in your entire life. Sunday was supposed to be a relaxing day off and an attempt to actually be somewhat sociable because god knows quarantine was rough, even with a steady job.  

But now Sunday was just anxiety bubbling in your stomach while you made the plum bbq glaze that Marcus liked so much. You’d imagined nothing more than calling up your mom to complain about how often you put your foot in your mouth but as you reached for the telephone you realized the only one around to listen to you talk about this weird crush you had on Carmy was your cat. The monster in question was a long haired black cat that the lady on the top floor had adopted before covid. She’d named him Rigoletto after the Italian opera and then decided she didn’t want him anymore.  

“That place down the street is hiring…although I’m not so sure I wanna work at an H&R Block.” You mused, scratching under Rigoletto’s chin before leaving him on the arm of the couch to finish the bbq sauce. “And I do really like the Beef…but what if Carmy hates this? And he fires me or something…is that crazy?”  

The cat didn’t have the chance to answer because the buzzer by your door went off. It was a little too early for anybody who usually showed up to arrive though you suspected it could be Syd (she’d been invited now too, along with Richie who had to decline because it was his Sunday with his daughter).  

You hit the button to unlock the front door without confirming who was there. Not a great habit but you were technically expecting someone and you tended to get a little lax with security every now and then. You propped the door to your apartment so that whoever you’d buzzed (Syd surely, maybe Ebraheim) would be able to just come right in.  

But as luck would have it, it wasn’t Syd that came through the door to your apartment. It was Carmen, holding two foil trays cause he promised he’d bring something (and okay, sure, maybe he over did himself for just a hang out in your apartment but so sue him if he wasn’t trying to impress you).  

“Hey uh…your cat looks like it’s gonna climb me.” He half greeted, half warned, staring down at the cat that had jumped off the couch and come over to greet him. Yellow eyes stared up at his blue ones, back hunched like it was ready to pounce and Carmy briefly imagined the cat jumping right into the trays in his hands.  

Before any worst case scenarios could happen you scooped the cat up in your arms, apologizing and telling Carmy he could lay the trays on the small island in your kitchen. “He’s super friendly,” you promised though you left him in your room and closed the door, “he’s a big fan of Chester.” 

“Marcus’ roommate?” Carmy almost laughed.  

“Yeah he uh, what are you doing?” You speedwalked the short distance back to the kitchen when you realized that Carmy had moved over to inspect the sauce you were making, spooning a tiny bit out and taking a bite.  

“It’s good, maybe a little maple syrup?” He offered, as if this was The Beef’s test kitchen. Without waiting for your okay he went to the fridge, opening it and pulling out a bottle of maple syrup. You wondered briefly if he had some sort of psychic sense that let him know you had maple syrup on hand or if Carmy just expected all the ingredients he needed to be right where he needed them at all times. “What’s this?”  

“It’s salad dressing,” you supplied, shifting awkwardly as he shook the bottle of salad dressing he’d plucked off the shelf. 

You watched him pop the lid and stick a clean butter knife in the jar, pulling it out and taste testing the dressing. This was objectively worse than you imagined inviting Carmy to your house would be. “Shit, that’s fire.”  

You could feel your face heat up at the compliment, though that was immediately out of your mind as Carmy continued his inspection of your fridge. When he started eyeing a tupperware of soup from last night, you reached over and closed the door on him, “okay; let’s be finished going through my fridge?”  

“Sorry,” he held his hands up in surrender, the bottle of dressing still in one hand. “I didn’t know you cooked.” It was the same thing he’d said to you earlier though it didn’t hold the same genuine surprise as it had earlier. Instead, he looked almost contemplative, as if finding something out about you that he hadn’t known before meant something you weren’t aware of.  

“Nothing serious,” you promised, going back to check on the burgers and looking back at Carmy, “would you…check these. I know it sounds dumb but, cooking meat gives me anxiety.”  

“It gives you anxiety?” He said it like he was trying not to laugh, a smile threatening his features as he set the dressing back in the fridge and came over to stand a little too close to you.  

“If you don’t cook it enough you could kill someone and if you cook it too much it’s gross,” you replied, glancing half over your shoulder at him as he leaned in to check the state of the burgers.  

“Alright…if you let me try the soup.”  

You caved, “fine.” Passing the wooden spatula and stepping to the side. “If Marcus asks, I totally cooked them myself.”  

Carmy nodded, grinning, “yeah alright.”  

Cooking with him, without the imminent pressure of a working kitchen, was more fun than you imagined it would be. When you’d wandered into the kitchen area of the Beef back when Mike was still around, he was always joking and talking shit with Richie. Carmy didn’t necessarily run a tighter ship but he was more serious about food and cooking and there was less time for bullshitting. You assumed the quiet intensity was how he always was but you realized that was an unfair judgement. He was relaxed in a way you hadn’t seen him be, that confidence in his food coming through with quiet remarks about this meal or that, shitty food he’d eaten while he was working in New York and stories about the CIA.  

- 

By the time everyone had finished eating and gone home, leaving you with a mess of plates and cutlery, you were a little tipsy but genuinely happy. It hadn’t been as stressful as you were making it out to be in your mind and Carmy relaxed on a Sunday night was completely different from Carmy in the kitchen at work.  

“You have a system or?” His voice broke your train of thought as you wiped the last crumbs off the table and realized that he was standing at your sink, kitchen towel over his shoulder.  

“You don’t have to help me clean up,” you tossed the crumbs and came over to the sink, “I mean you fixed the burgers.”  

“I didn’t ‘fix’ them,” he almost looked like he was gonna laugh. “I just helped them along.”  

“Well either way, you shouldn’t have to clean up too.”  

“I don’t mind.” He promised, “now, you got a system?”  

“Not really,” you shook your head, “but I don’t have a dishwasher so everything’s by hand.”  

“I got time.” Carmy promised and you couldn’t help feeling like your heart was going to thud right out of your chest, “besides you promised me some of that soup.”  

“You just ate like a whole meal Carm, you’re not seriously gonna have soup at midnight are you?” You asked though honestly you didn’t think you would be surprised if the answer was that yes, he would have soup at midnight.  

“Yeah if it’s good,” he joked.  

You shook your head, not answering and instead focusing your attention on drying dishes too large to fit in the rack beside your sink. The frying pan went back on the stove with the pot beside it. While Carmy finished the very last of the dishes you let Rigoletto out of your bedroom, the cat stretching languidly as he appraised the room.  

“My mom had a cat once,” he mentioned, eyeing Rigoletto as he approached the kitchen area, “ended up giving it to the neighbor cause it jumped on the counters all the time. Nothing like cat hair in your chicken picante.”  

“Rigoletto’s too fat to make it to the counter.” You replied, “if he did I’d be too impressed to be upset with him.”  

“What are you doing?” Carmy watched you curiously as you got a bowl out of the cabinet and grabbed a bag of granola.  

“Homemade granola,” you shook the bag, “it’s for the top of the soup.” When he didn’t say anything you added, “just trust me.” 

“It’s your recipe.”  

“I feel like that wasn’t as confident sounding as I wanted it to be,” you laughed, passing the heated up bowl across the counter to him, granola sprinkled over the top, “it’s apple and brie soup.”  

“Apple?” 

“Okay, like you’ve made some weird fucking shit before Carm. Don’t act like this is the craziest thing you’ve ever heard of.”  

He raised his hands in surrender, spoon teetering between his fingers briefly before he was leaning forward to take a bite. “To be fair, I rarely see you even near the kitchen at work.”  

“Well I’m not as good as anyone there, I just like trying different stuff on my own time.”  

“This is really good,” he mentioned, taking another spoonful, “you have a recipe?” 

“Yeah, I have a notebook somewhere.” You weren’t a hundred percent sure where you’d placed your notebook though you knew it was floating around somewhere in the apartment.  

“Show me?” He asked, then, “not right now…just whenever.” The request was vague and you knew that ultimately you could just take it to mean showing him the actual handwritten recipe that you used to make the soup that he was almost finished eating but it could also mean actually cooking with him. Something that, 24 hours ago would have definitely scared the shit out of you. Cooking with someone like Carmy? That was out of the question.  

“When do you ever have free time?” You kept the question light, a joke more than an observation of his life, “I was surprised you came tonight.”  

“I thought about not coming,” he shrugged, “figured if you wanted me to you woulda asked yourself but…” the sentence teetered off and you took a few seconds silence to really weigh how your relationship with Carmen looked from his end.  

“Sorry, it’s not that you aren’t invited or anything…just that you’re kinda intimidating and if you were coming over than I’d wanna impress you and if I didn’t at least make edible food I’d be embarrassed.”  

“It could use a little fine-tuning but it’s not bad by any stretch.”  

“Okay,” you almost laughed at the bluntness of his statement. Ask him anything else and he clammed up but ask him about food and he was direct.  

“Sorry I-” 

“Don’t be sorry,” you shook your head quickly, wanting him to understand that you weren’t at all bothered by the comment. Maybe if you were in an actual professional in a kitchen...you’d heard him and Syd go at it before over a dish and you knew that Carmy could be mean when he was in ‘kitchen-mode’. “I mean, aside from you, the only people who eat what I cook are like...my parents. And what are they gonna say?” 

Carmy didn’t say anything, taking the empty bowl and placing it in the sink. He looked like he wanted to say more but instead he reached for his coat, “thanks for letting me invite myself.”  

“Hey, anytime you wanna come over...” You admitted. Tonight hadn’t been as scary as you thought it was and, in all honesty, you kind of liked having Carmy here. Getting to see him more relaxed was nice and cooking with him was somehow better. “Besides, I promised to show you the soup.” 

“Yeah,” he nodded. Trying to fix the Beef, pay off Jimmy, and generally just exist didn’t leave a whole lot of free time but he didn’t think he would mind making some just so he could stand around in your kitchen with you again. It felt almost the way he used to feel when Mike was still alive and everything still had a layer of candy-coating on it. That sort of simple, ‘if I don’t leave this moment nothing can go wrong’ feeling that tightened his chest and made him feel warm.  

“I’ll see you at work tomorrow?” You phrased it like a question but it was a fact.  

“Tomorrow.” He agreed.  The possibility of it already making him eager for the morning.

[total-drama-brainrot]

Total Drama AU/Headcanon: Where everything is the same, except Noah is just as crazy/insane as Izzy and Eva, but he's much better at hiding it (with a sarcastic calm personality) ... Only Izzy, Eva and Owen know his true unhinged colors (and that's why they get along with him so well) .../// Duncan briefly saw it during the Total Drama Island Special Finale, when Duncan grabbed Noah's leg, but Noah escaped, and we didn't see HOW Noah escaped... In this AU, Noah bit Duncan's hand then gave Duncan a silent psychotic grin, which shocked Duncan and gave Noah time to escape (Noah basically pretending the bite and grin never happened) ... In TDWT, imagine if Alejandro ever found out that the sanest one on his Team is only PRETENDING to be sane! 😅

I've seen that one Scary!Noah AU floating about in the main tag lately, and I love the concept. There's so much that could be done with having someone like Noah (scarily smart, mostly motivated by either spite or The Bit, nerfed by his own laziness/apathy/hubris) have the added bonus of Going Apeshit sometimes. Either as a treat to himself, or as the natural consequence of his hidden nature.

It's like that "Izzy Isn't Crazy" theory, but in reverse. "Noah Is Crazy, He's Just Good At Masking".

In this AU, he and Izzy would get on like a house on fire.

Like recognises like, after all; Izzy would clock him as just as unhinged as herself at their first meeting, and probably confront him about his 'game plan' at the first chance she could (maybe that's why she was so quick to swap with Katie? A bid to get herself on the same team as Noah?). Noah would try to deny it at first, because he's supposed to be the 'lazy genius'- slipping from his allotted persona this soon into the competition would jeopardise his strategy!- but Izzy would reassure him that she can practically smell the crazy on him.

He'd live up to his title as 'The Schemer', by means of plotting pranks and other such events with Izzy. She'd use her status as the overt crazy girl to pull them off, and Noah would either help behind the scenes to abate his hunger for chaos, or live vicariously through Izzy's blatant mania whilst revelling in the fact that their plan(s) play out perfectly every time. Imagine how much better Izzy's bear suit prank would've been with a man on the inside- and now imagine how much better it would've been if Noah pretended to get eaten/mauled by bear!Izzy (using smuggled ketchup packets and A Lot Of Screaming to convince the Gophers of his demise)! (He'd play off the incident by blaming the whole thing on Izzy- saying she was the one who used the ketchup, and his screaming was just him being Rightfully Terrified of being eaten. Gotta keep up the charade!)

No one would suspect him either! Who would ever assume that slothful, apathetic Noah who complains about the trials and tribulations of 'hard work', 'effort' and 'physical activity' could be a friend and an accomplice to the unstoppable force of nature that is Izzy? He's always too busy shoving his nose into his book to ever consider befriending the crazy girl, there's no way Noah would even tolerate her! (/s)

I think he'd eventually reveal his true colours to Team E-scope plus Owen once their friendship is cemented off-screen. Noah isn't the trusting type (I'd clarify, but I'd end up writing a whole unrelated essay- maybe another time) and he's habitually secretive- his non-answers in the WT Character Interview and his Sierra-given title of "The Man of Mystery" attest to this- so he'd need to know that his friends are really his friends before letting himself be vulnerable/transparent with them, since any 'friendships' made on Total Drama always run the risk of being a ploy/fake. It is a social game, after all.

As for the Duncan Incident. Having Noah bite people is going to turn into a running gag for me at this point, because it's so fucking hilarious to imagine him in a scenario where he's forced/pressured into violence and immediately starts chomping down on someone. This weasel boy wasn't built for punches and kicks but On God can he use those pearly whites to cause some damage. (The human jaw has a surprisingly strong bite force. Noah absolutely knows this.)

I'd also like to suggest that Noah rips himself out of his cargo shorts after biting Duncan, leaving the punk with a bleeding handful of nerd shorts and an open wound for his troubles. He'd already let go of Noah by that point too; it's hard to maintain your grip on anything when you've got a manic bookworm tearing away at the tendons in your hands. So he's just sat there, terrified and concerned, nursing the throbbing, sluggishly bleeding bitemark on his hand and wondering how Noah managed to contort his usually stoic facial features into a grin so wild and feral.

And Noah races back to Izzy and Eva, face and teeth splattered in Duncan's blood, sans cargo shorts. Neither of them question it; Izzy has an idea of what he's done, since Noah's smugness levels have risen at least three tiers and he's smiling almost contentedly to himself, and Eva has learned how to Mind Her Own Business when it comes to Izzy and Noah's eccentricities (though she often shoots inquisitive looks towards Noah's red-painted face).

Then in World Tour? Alejandro is suffering. Noah's the only person on his team who isn't lacking braincells and/or completely unhinged (or so he thinks), and as such he's the latino's only lifeline to sanity on the forsaken jet. So when Duncan returns in London and seems scared of the harmless bookworm? That's concerning.

Assuming that Noah's a wee bit more savvy in this AU thanks to his subterfuge experience in Island, he probably wouldn't be as outwardly apparent in his distrust of Alejandro during the challenge- either that, or he'd be enjoying torturing Tyler too much to think about how much of an eel Alejandro is. So Alejandro wouldn't have any reason to want to eliminate him, if anything he'd be motivated to keep him around, if only to act as a buffer between himself and the idiocy of Team Chris.

Duncan's re-introduction and allocation to the team would be Alejandro's first inkling into the fact that Noah is more than he seems. When the delinquent is ushered to stand next to Alejandro and Noah, his pupils contract into pinpricks or terror, and his attention flickers between the aloof cynic to his side and an oval-shaped scar on his hand. The cynic shoots Duncan a friendly smile (Alejandro ignores how the smile doesn't quite reach Noah's eyes) and the punk turns sheet white.

Alejandro doesn't know what to make of it.

[kittyball23]

Announcement!!

For those of you keeping up with my writing, I will actually be putting a pause on the request-taking. It’s been a little tiring to keep up the daily updates (and honestly I’m surprised at myself to have kept up as long as I have lol). But yeah, my streak stops at 36 days because I need a little break to a) spend time with my family for the holidays and b) refresh and be in a better mindset for the new year so that I can continue writing 🙂

I appreciate every comment, like, and reblog that I’ve gotten so far and thank my readers so much! 💖

Also, to keep you all in the loop, here’s some of my upcoming stuff. This includes a mix of requests and also my own ideas that I would like to work on once I start up again:

Untitled Cliva oneshot (Grown-Up Stuff)

Untitled Cliva date (Brodacious!)

Untitled AU where Bruce hears about Floyd’s capture on his True Crime podcast (The Wormhole)

Untitled Broppy schedules intimate time alone (Grown-up Stuff)

Untitled Broppy reaction to first time (Grown-up Stuff)

Untitled AU where Branch gives up his talent to save Floyd from dying (The Wormhole)

Untitled Branch prepares a nursery for his and Poppy’s baby (Brodacious!)

Untitled Broppy baby is born (Brodacious!)

Untitled Cloud Guy plays a prank on BroZone (Brodacious!)

Untitled Spruce’s ketchup incident (Brodacious!)

None of these are in any particular release order, and I have no set date at this moment for when I’ll update again.

In addition, I’ll also be catching up on answering Asks from my Inbox (I need to catch up lmao, so I’m tagging the folks that apply on that behalf: @aquamarine-dream-queen, @ceci-butterfly, @miniglitch07, @ladywitch17, @chipmunkfanno1love, @bf-1352, @toonmania25, @imholtorf, @burningmusicfunnygiant, and Anonymous requesters!)

[leggerefiore]

https://twitter.com/sasaku_rkgk/status/1635669369450795009?s=20

https://twitter.com/sasaku_rkgk/status/1638145415915925505?s=20

I've completely forgot about this but I found it while cleaning out things BUT s/o making bento boxes/lunch that look like this for them.

Thought it be cute.

anon, the pokemon café food could be so many cute reactions from characters. ingo getting the Sneasel Burger™️

▲Ingo▼

● Poor guy was already overjoyed you made him a lunch and just was tearing up. You could put literal garbage in there, and he would still eat it because he's just so happy his love made him something so sweet and domestic. Ingo makes certain he doesn't miss his lunch break because he simply must make sure to eat your lovingly made meal.

● When he finally opens the box, his eyes go wide at the sight of the dishes inside. An adorable Drillbur themed chocolate cream dish explained why you asked him to make sure he placed it in the refrigerator at work. A cute note you left assured him it wasn't overly sweet, to align with his tastes. A thermos held cooled coffee with an adorable Litwick cup sat beside it. He held back a bravo. This was already too much for him.

● The Trubbish and Garbodor themed rice balls broke him, though. You reassured him you were careful to choose fillings that he'd definitely enjoy in your note. Ingo needed to thank you for all this effort. It truly brightened his day. He happily ate all the cute dishes you prepared for him and was clearly in a good mood for the rest of the day. Even an incident report couldn't bring down his emotional high.

● When he got home, you were quickly embraced and showered with endless praise from your beloved train man. It may tempt you to make more dishes like that for him. (This is how the Sneasel Burger somehow happens with his post or after Hisui.)

▽Emmet△

○ When you placed the odd box into his hands on his way out of the house, he had been confused. You then explained it was his lunch, and he nodded. Emmet is happy you made him food, the container just caught him off guard. He eagerly clocks out for his lunch break and sits the box on his desk. He enjoyed your cooking a lot, so he already expected to like what you made.

○ You proceeded to make his jaw drop and him gasp. The food inside made his grin grow large after getting over the initial shock. Joltik omelette left him overly giddy. They looked just like his babies! The ketchup on one even had him slightly concerned at first. The egg rice with a styled Tynamo made him just sit there with a goofy grin. You left a cute note teasing him about needing a diverse diet than sweets and hoping he enjoyed the meal.

○ You, however, weren't so cruel as to deny him his beloved sweets. Two doughnuts laid in the box, themed like two pieces of a Klink. You gave one a black nose and the other a white one. He chuckled at the idea of he and his brother being the pieces of a Klink. Emmet devoured the entire lunch box, but with momentary hesitation towards the Joltik omelette. He was scared he'd bite into it and hear a familiar squeak. It didn't happen, however, thankfully. All the Depot Agents were then terrified by a genuinely at ease and happy Subway Boss Emmet treading through the station. No one dared ruin his mood.

○ When he got home, you got tackled into a hug and covered in kisses. He thanked you for such a “verrrry” cute meal and squeezed you tightly to him. You definitely were tempted to make more for him, though he did beg you for more sweets.

▲▽▲▽▲▽▲

Sneasel Burger.....

[fushitism]

the chemistry in my brain is altered in unspeakable ways whenever i think about Sans.

JUST WHO EXACTLY IS THIS GUY

its so easy, almost too easy, not to take him seriously and its exactly why his character can often be, well, i wouldn't say overlooked, this guy's pretty popular, but his traits tend to be.... diluted?? simplified??? for lack of better words..?

like yeah, he likes ketchup. yeah, he's laid-back n "lazy". yeah, he's a punny guy. yeah, he goes above n beyond for his brother's happiness... but what else?

do we even know much about papyrus? that guy's whole deal deserves a whole separate post!

CAN WE PLEEAAASE RECALL HOW THIS PIECE OF LORE WAS CASUALLY (in true toby fox fashion) SENT TO OUR EMAILS ?? NEVER TO BE ELABORATED UPON EVER AGAIN

why'd sans have to pull a sock incident on us at a time like this </3

PAPYRUS DID NOT MEAN IT SO LITERALLY AND YOU KNOW THAT, SANS, YOU JUST WANTED TO BE A LITTLE SHIT!!!!!!

their life before snowdin.. oh what i'd give to hear all about it...

this got me thinking, though.

we know sans likely has an affinity for quantum physics, temporal complexities and astronomy (though the latter is irrelevant to the point i'll be making)

he can teleport for God's sake why are we so unfazed by that

aaaanywho,

so like his Workshop. the one with the broken machine, yeah. look at what toby's once said abt it

why would they (who i assume r alphys + sans ?) try so hard to fix it? it's not like its the CORE (the machine said to be the source of all power 4 the undergound)

what's so important about this rusty, clanky pile of scrap metal?

....

haha lol, remember this?

remember this (x2)?

there's an abstract them here, and its clear he's not talking abt papyrus, frisk or even the player if we were to try n reach so hard.

could it be he is refereing to those in the picture with him?

if so, they must really mean a lot to him

so let's get this straight:

- we know the skelebros were NEW additions to snowdin

- we know they had an OLD life, the picture at the workshop further proving sans also had a social circle, one beyond frisk's recognition which totally strikes me as odd, given this child has been ambushed by almost all monsters at that point

- sans knows about timelines. sans messes with time and space. it's heavily hinted sans has worked in quantum physics (the book[s] found at his place) and he apparently also has some abandoned, broken machine in his workshop (one of which he's presumably tinkered with)

- as a lost soul (but also in geno), sans demonstrates his intense defeatism and resignation saying this like,

.... is sans trying to go back somewhere? do the skelebros come from a different world? a grassy place? r the residents of said place related to the picture in any way? does sans miss them? were they family? friends? lovers?! whoooooooo!1!!1 when!!! where!!!!! what is going on, toby!!!! PLEASEHWHWUE

[inhale]

but you know what, this is fine. pssssh, we don't need any of these answered, haha! no waaay! because while the UT fandom's in up in flames about such matters, toby's probably out there drawing yet another sans x reigen art piece to dish out when we least expect it (please let it be on my biryhday please let it be on my birthd)

[angelsnkisses]

fluffy headcanons - gabriel <3

💟 sfw 💟

warnings: none!

made a gabe gif cause there weren't any <3 sorry for the quality holy shit 😭

let's pretend that by some miracle, his family didn't ship him off to the hospital after the whole incident after all. they convinced alice's dad to not press charges, but he never saw her again. he started working harder to contol him impulses, met you, and even got to move into your apartment with you :) now, let's begin.

-

• gabe would love your apartment. he likes that you have it all set up and decorated, instead of plain or minimalistic.

• he would lounge around with you when you were both home from work, always laying his head in your lap while you were reading a book or spooning you on the couch while you were watching a movie.

• he'd be very hygienic, always muttering to himself about being a 'clean machine'. you honestly found it adorable, and it wasn't like he was hurting anything by being clean.

• you guys would go to the diner he showed you twice a week, and he would always order the same thing (hash and eggs with cheese :) plus a copious amount of ketchup).

• he'd like going on walks with you around the area of the city you lived in, which was fairly quiet. he'd especially like going at night, when the street lamps were the only thing illuminating the quiet streets and no one was around to interrupt you guys.

• he'd help you make dinner when you guys have the time <3. some days you'd order take out, it just depended on how work went for the two of you.

• he'd compliment you so much!!

"is that shirt mine? you look so pretty."

"i love your eyes, they're beautiful.."

"your hair looks different, did you change something? i like it :)."

• he'd like sitting with you outside when he smokes, whether you smoke or not. if you did, he would share with you or offer you your own.

• he'd love spooning you, he'd love when you laid on his chest, he'd love laying his head on your stomach with his arms hugging your waist.. pretty much any way he could touch you, he loved.

• if you had any pets, he would probably be obsessed with them. always giving them treats, cuddling up to them on the couch, etc. it'd be so adorable, and you would have several photos.

• nights with you would be his absolute favorite. he'd love cuddling up with you, muttering to you about his day and such before you both went to sleep.

• he would always be clinging to you when you woke up, he'd just love you so much <3.

**

A/N: today was so funnn omg, i got to hang out with my favorite people <3. hope you enjoyed, there's not enough gabe content on here :).

[risewriter]

ROTTMNT: Incident

Mikey: *Whistles as he enters the kitchen*

Mikey: W-Wha- *Finds all his brothers covered in red liquid and Raph holding a shovel* What the?!

Raph: This ain't what it looks like!

Leo: Yeah! The ketchup wouldn't open so-

Mikey: So, you used a shovel?!

[cerealandchoccymilk]

Trigun Bookclub: Trigun Vol.1, Chapters #00-01

all | next

lets fucking do this

I'm annotating every chapter of trigun, both the Japanese original print (reread) and Overhaul 1.0 (first read). Literally just writing down everything I notice about details, version differences, translation notes, etc. and also being gay about the characters. happy pride month

I had other stuff to do today yesterday so I only got through a little bit but pace will pick up tomorrow today (1 volume/week is faster than i thought...)

Here are the beloved non-analysis sillies...

And there are just so many annotation images so I just put the rest under the cut <3 read my notes boy

[edit: why aren't the images not being side by side like i want them to i hate this. here's the url for my blog page with correct formatting] [edit 2: i guess it's only on desktop, not on mobile. so that's good]

First thing I noticed was the difference in the number of volumes, or the number of chapters in each volume. In my JP copy, volume 1 ends at Chapter #07: Rem, while Overhaul (and I assume every version after the first JP print) ends at #12: River of Life.

Anyways onto the actual images

21st of July - !! didn't notice [that the July incident actually happened in July] during 1st read b/c months are only numbers in Japanese 11 hours after destruction - July incident was 2am

For some reason I thought he was standing this whole time. unneccesary details georg

Estimated age: 24 - Official age for his appearance? dang he's young Appearance - "Place of origin/birth," not "what he looks like" The worst kind of outlaw, and an unrivalled killer. - Added in a later version? (not in my JP copy but the phrase is familiar)

This blank space originally had the Japanese translation for the board.

We see his serious expression already! I don't remember '98 doing so this early on so it's pretty notable to me...

Just thinking about how Vash counted each individual gunshot being fired during all that chaos... dear god.... During my first read/watch I thought it was just silly Rule of Cool protagonist moment but not really. This guy actually has Insane perception, either from being a plant or sheer practice. Or both.

Also immediately after all that, I really love the way the aftermath is shown here. The only things you can hear are the creaks of the light and the crying boy. It really brings out the tension in the atmosphere.

Finally, something other than unneccesary bits! If you look at the flooring under the toy gun, the perspective lines are pointing SW-NE. This corresponds to the flooring on Vash's right, whose right arm is also suspiciously out-of-frame... This is definitely the moment he took the toy gun. I can't express the amount of Holy Shit I felt when I realized this. The detail!!!!! man!!!!!!!!!

There's a little translation error here - it should be something like "Even if he were still alive, he wouldn't be able to move an inch!"

One of my favorite Vash moves with one of my favorite Tumblr heritage posts.

This is not really based on any drawn details, but I think this is the moment that Vash readies the toy gun, puts it in his pocket, and picks up the ketchup. Do Not trust this man when his arm is not visible. Also finger still in gun <3 doing his part blocking one bullet at a time

And here we have Vash's first COOL cool moment!!!!!! cue my homo screaming. goddddddddd im so mentally unwell about him. agh I also absolutely love when Nightow does that thing where he screen-tones a character's skin just because. It pops!! It's unique!! I love it!! I eat it up every time!!!

Here's where I realize that Vash's hair antennae are pointing straight up. I should be on the lookout for when he makes the transition to the M-shaped antennae we know and love.

Also, a little untranslatable joke from the Japanese version. In Japanese, this guy calls out at Vash like "And you, don't provoke him!" except it's written with the kanji for "Hunter" (狩人 karyūdo), with a ruby pronunciation note saying "you" (おまえも omaemo). These kanji/ruby mismatch jokes are never not funny and it's so sad that there's no way to keep them in without doing...this lol

The "I counted!" reveal never fails to get me. holy shit. I love the little boy's expression when he gets his gun back :) You helped!!! and you don't have to have the real deal to be cool as balls!!!

Just lumping this with the previous two because it's a tall image, but another small translation error. Rather than being about doing harm, he's talking about recieving it (～～はゴメンだ is a hard-to-catch phrasing/idiom; it's already been discussed with the translator on a different instance). It should be more like "[...But] nobody likes getting hurt, right?"

THE GIRLIES YIPPEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not including the dialogue because. y'know. At least they get (accidentally) Bonked by Millie :) get their asses

Here, the order suggestion is made by somebody off-screen, but in the first edition, it was made by the cook himself. (left image annotation says "the storekeeper(cook) is so nice!")

That's it for chapters #00-01! I'm going to keep having Category 5 Autism Events every day aren't I.

It's literally 1:20am as of finishing this post because my computer won't stop crashing. Posting this first thing in the morning tomorrow <3

Also, the Japanese copy of the annotations will be in the reblogs for anyone who wants to see them. The emotions are Rawer and they're phrased way less awkwardly... if you can read them lol

[we-are-inevitable]

you asked for restaurant au requests so!! restaurant au javid?? and if there is a sauce-related incident i'd appreciate it?? (no pressure though!) - @pigeonwit

OHHH!! absolutely.

edit after writing: this got out of hand. i love them so so much.

———

“Corner!”

That’s all the warning David gets before a body rounds the corner and rams straight into his own. He sees it first, a curly mop of blonde hair, a high-pitched yell, a tray flying out of hands— all too suddenly, David is splayed on his back on the kitchen floor, and all too suddenly, his white shirt is soaked in something chunky and wet.

Racer immediately kneels down next to him, eyes wide as one of the big pans they use to cook up all of the fries. “David! Oh, shit! Man, are you okay?”

“I— Yeah, I’m fine. Get me up,” David says, but as soon as he sits up, there’s a distinct pain in the middle of his back. He winces, and that must be noticeable, because Racer instantly starts asking questions.

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine, just—“

“No, you’re hurt, aren’t you? Fuck, I am so sorry, I didn’t know you were right there, I’m sorry—“

With a sigh, David grabs onto Racer’s shoulder, slowly pushing himself up to a standing position despite the blossoming feeling of ow currently pulsating through his body. “Kid, you’re okay, okay? You’re fine,” David says through gritted teeth.

Everyone in the kitchen is looking at them by now. David slowly turns to give them all a glance, noticing that something is missing— and just at that moment, Jack walks into the kitchen, smelling like cigarette smoke masked by a high-end cologne.

Jack stops just before the mess on the floor, taking it in with wide eyes, and he quickly looks up and makes eye contact with David. “What the hell happened?”

David sees the nervous look on Racer’s face, so he concedes and says, “It’s my fault. I was leaving and ran into Racer, I fell down and dropped the food. I’ll clean it up.”

“Clean yourself up first,” Jack comments, gesturing to David’s shirt, smeared with all sorts of colors: red and green salsa, garlic aioli, ranch and ketchup— a menagerie of condiments for a menagerie of burgers. “You didn’t get hurt when you fell, did’ja?”

“No, I—“

“He fucked up his back,” Race says from the side, and David gives him a nudge with his elbow. “He’s movin’ slow and it looked like he hurt when he sat up.”

Jack takes the information in, and gestures to the dishwasher. “I’ll give you a ten if you clean this up,” he says, gesturing to the pocket his wallet resides in, and the dishwasher responds with a curt nod. Turning to his linecooks, Jack nods to them as well. “Keep doin’ what you’re doin’. Rush isn’t startin’ for another twenty minutes, I’ll be back in ten at the most. Got it?”

“On it,” Specs pipes up, not even looking away from the task at hand.

With that done, David watches as Jack reaches out, then sighs at the feeling of Jack’s hand on his shoulder. They walk slowly to the manager’s office- a larger room off to the side of the kitchen, with a couple of comfy chairs and a place for staff to eat their food.

“Don’t bother Charlie with this, please,” David says, head lolling just enough to look at Jack. “I’m fine, really.”

Jack clicks his tongue a few times, then pulls out his keyring and unlocks the door. “Charlie ain’t here,” He murmurs, pushing the door open and leading Davey inside, only to lock the door behind them. “He’s runnin’ up to the bank. Register’s almost outta change for customers.”

“Ohhh, okay, makes sense,” David nods, then takes in a deep breath. “So… can I go, if he’s not here? I have tables I need to check on.”

“They can wait. Your health is more important than a table,” Jack says like it’s the easiest thing to understand, and Davey wants to agree, but he never knows. A few good tips could be the difference between eating and not.

But he doesn’t bother arguing with Jack, because that’s never gotten him anywhere in the past.

Jack, after rummaging around in a locker for a moment, comes back to Davey with a clean- albeit wrinkled- white shirt. He sets it down on Charlie’s desk, and walks back to David, and suddenly, there’s a tenderness in his eyes that wasn’t there before— a carefully concealed care. Jack cups his cheek, and leans up to press a soft kiss to his forehead.

With that, Jack makes gentle work of untucking David’s shirt, working the buttons open until he can push the fabric off of his shoulders.

David gulps, and says, “I wish you were undressing me in a different circumstance right now.”

That quip gets a grin in response, Jack looking up at him with bright eyes. “Turn around, you dumbass.” And who is David not to comply? He turns, feeling Jack’s hands on his back. “Hm… It looks a little red,” He mumbles. “You sure you feel okay?”

David hesitates, then nods. “Yeah, I just… I guess I’m taking it slow today,” he murmurs. “If it gets worse, I’ll call out tomorrow. Racer owes me a covered shift anyway, I’ll talk to him if I need to.”

“If you’re sure,” Jack says softly, kissing the back of David’s neck. He then gently turns David around in his arms, running a hand through his hair. “Make sure you let me know if you need to go home, okay? I got a lotta sway over Char.”

David just grins and leans down, pressing a gentle kiss to Jack’s lips. “I’d rather go home with you,” He says softly, then sighs, grabbing the shirt off of Charlie’s desk. “I need to go check on my tables. I’d love to stay in here and have you all over me, but…”

Jack rolls his eyes. “I wasn’t all over you. I was makin’ sure you weren’t hurt,” He defends, though his smile is more than telling.

With a shake of his head, Davey finishes buttoning his new shirt, tucking it into his belt. It’s a little loose on him- it’s likely Jack’s- but he rolls the sleeves up and smiles in Jack’s direction. “Thank you, ahuví,” David says, and gives Jack one last kiss on the lips before they both walk towards the door.

“Ready to hate each other again?” Jack asks, and David squeezes his hand three times. They both walk out, discarding the dirty shirt into one of the trashcans in the kitchen, and David walks back to the front of house with a new smile on his face.

[tinyattack09]

ALLL MORAL OREL FANS

you wanna see a fix where Clay is confronted by literal god???

Here it is!!!

Beseech

After the Danielle incident and the hunting tragedy, Clay Puppington receded to his study most of the time. Making no attempt to change, he would waste his days drinking and having an affair with both Censordoll and Stopframe. But, we all know that the lord giveth, and the lord taketh away.

“Clayton Middleinitial Puppington!”

“G-…God!?”

“It is I, the Heavenly Father.” His voice shook the room, and boomed into his body.

“Wha-…Why have you visited me, Lord?” Clay said, clearly in a daze.

“You have a lesson to learn, Clayton. You give your own

lessons and stories while convoluting their meaning to fit your way of destructive, abusive life. It is time that you learn, mortal. The Lord’s mercy only reaches you if it remains pure.”

A sword of pure light appeared. As the Lord held it, the power

changed its hue.

“Lord, what are you doing!?” Clay stepped back. He knew that

he was in trouble, and he couldn’t bribe this one to go away. The sword was raised, and all the light in the room was focused only on Clay.

“What is necessary to keep my world pure.”

“Why…?!”

"Why!? Pathetic. Unable to realize thy faults. Let us see your life, and what it really was."

Everything fades. There is a young boy holding a gun. It shakes in his hands as he struggles to bear such a deadly tool.

"It's a tradition in the Puppington family that the head of the household would pass off this gun to the eldest son."

"Wow, dad… But I don't think I could kill an animal. That seems too mean."

"Son, nature was made to be hunted. We get to 'play god.'"

“Play God?? Golly Pops… that doesn’t sound very right…

You know the sixty-third commandment! ‘Thou shalt never hold a gun without anything to shoot at!’ And we have to follow God’s rules!”

The memory switches to a young Puppington, holding that

same gun, while ketchup was spewed all over the child’s body.

“Clay! Clay! Clayton! Open your fucking eyes!” Clay’s body was shook violently.

“What?? I didn’t do anything!” Clay springs back to life, having

pretended he was dead. His mother then cried out

“Oh thank the heavens! Lord, thank you-“ She froze in the

middle of her sentence. She fell to the floor, her heart unresponsive.

“Mom!” Clay ran to his now dead mother, understanding what he did.

“Get back!” Clay’s father pushed him back, slamming him to a wall. No CPR could be done, and Amanda Puppington was declared dead. The memory fades to black.

Clay was frozen.

“I-… I was so young, Father! I didn’t know what I was doing! I was only six years old!”

“Then let us watch something more… recent, yes?” The memory flashes to the wilderness. Clay is an adult, and stands there with his twelve year-old son, Orel.

“Dad… I think you might be *too* drunk.”

“I… Let me tell you something, Orel! Drunk is nature.”

“I’m not really comfortable hunting with you, Dad.” Orel is tense, gripping to the log he’s sitting on.

“You aren’t comfortable hunting with me? Ever tried hunting with you!?” Clay gulps down his liquor like it’s the last bottle of water in the desert.

“Y’know kid, your cup is always half empty. Look at me. You should be more like your old man and look on the blight side of life.”

“B-Blight?” Orel said, shivering from his fear.

“No, I didn’t say ‘bright,’" Clay interrupted, "I said blight. My life is sunny and blight. ‘Bright’ means the opposite — it means sudden withering death. And that’s… not… Oh, who am I kidding, my life is full of bright…”

“Dad..?” Orel replied, terrified that his father would lose composure.

“Oh, God.”

“What’s happening, Dad!?” Orel cried.

"Oh, I hate myself…”

He runs out of liquor in the bottle. He stares at his reflection, silently hoping that it would be the last time he’d have to see it.

“Why do you quit working on me!?!”

Everything goes silent. No birds chirping, no crickets, no owls in the night.

“She always fools me, Orel. ‘I’ll make things better dear! Drink me! Put me inside of you, I’m great!’ And then she chokes me just like every other whore out there!! They’re all worthless, kid! Every woman. Don’t let ‘em get ya! All of them just wanna get ya! They just grab you and pull you into ‘em! And then you’re forced to stay in, pull out. Stay in, and pull out!! And then they cut ya! And they grip ya by the… right where it counts! And then they start SQUEEZING things out! Things that are like weights around your head! You’re stuck there for the rest of your life, with NOWHERE to go and NO ONE to be!!! AAAAGH!!!”

The scene faded out.

"What's so bad about that?! It's useful advice!" Clay exclaimed, deluded by his own prejudice.

"Just wait, mortal."

The scene reappeared. It opens to clay and Orel sitting across from each other, with clay in a drunken stupor. Orel is now as far away from Clay as he can be while still on a log.

"It's time you became a man. Where's my rifle!?" Clay yells, searching for it/

"Dad, I don't think-"

"There it is! No mistakes, no accidents, no fuck-ups, no blunders."

"Dad! W-What are you doing?!"

"Somethin' important!!"

A single, lone spark flew. Following it was an ear-splitting bang. No noise could be heard after that, other than the ringing going through both of their ears.

"D-...Dad…"

The scene fades for the final time.

Clay was frozen.

"Do you realize thy fault now? Are you able to comprehend the weight of your sin?! Do you finally see that your actions have consequences, Puppington!?" The ethereal voice boomed. Its volume was so loud that Clay was shaken back into reality.

Clay was speechless. Instead of pleading for his case, he simply stood there thinking. He didn't need to speak, for his god could tell exactly what he was thinking.

I couldn't have done that. But I did. How? Why? What do I do!? What do I do?!

But then a thought hit him.

Just give up. You've been so dedicated to your Lord your entire life. Give everything to Him.

"Please…" Clay said, hopeless and weak. Clay then fell to his knees. He didn't dare to raise his head, or so much as stand up.

"Please what?" The deity spoke. Tears began to roll down Clay's cheeks as he remained there kneeling before his God.

"Please… Have mercy," he muttered. He was too weak to raise his voice.

"Forgive me, Lord. Forgive me. I'm weak without you, God."

"You beseech for something you could not give to your own, Clayton. The kingdom of heaven does not allow those like you."

The sword of light raised up once more, as Clay said his final vow.

"I'm sorry, Orel."

A scream rang out. The scream of a weak, hopeless, self-destructive, and miserable young boy. The light disappeared, and all that was left was a soul, going to neither heaven nor hell. The soul was trapped in the mortal world, and had a chain around its neck.

Suddenly, Orel walked into the study. As he stepped further, something came into view.

The end of a chain that led directly to his neck.

RB AND LIKE I SPENT SO MUCH TKMD ON THIS OKAY BYE