#like my luck today is insane !!!!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

selfinflictedgunshotwound · 2 months

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sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible

#trying to keep it together so bad because i already know the problems and solutions and whatnot but i cannot do anything #i desperately just need to do something. accomplish any task. actually several would be nice. but i cannot stand just letting life go by #while i watch other people have the things i want. or even metaphorically living my dream like. that should be me why am i settling for thi #i hate even talking about this because i feel so stupid when i know it's not even a real tangible problem and that i actually DO have real #problems to tackle and the ability to do so but i'm choosing to be upset over the stupidest things i could possibly be sad about #and i can't even be sad about it in a normal way i'm cycling through like several different reactions to smth that isn't even real #or if it is real i literally do not have tanglible evidence for it one way or another like i'm driving myself insane for no reason #i can't even get catharsis because all i'm doing is digging a deeper hole for something i never should've gone back into in the first place #because i KNOW how i am i KNOW how i react to things and i still chose to do it lmao.#and i continue to choose to go through this shit instead of actively trying to change my life because... i'm lazy? and stupid? idk #negative self-talk isn't gonna get me to do anything either so let's just say i'm feeling particularly unmotivated like usual #i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed #a test in chemistry or something. like i yearn for that simplicity becasue at this point all i'm doing is ruining my own life LMAO #i'm too scared to live i'm too scared to die so i just sit here and fantasize that life could be amazing if i wait #and i'll magically get everything i've ever wanted if i just wait long enough. and i know it isn't true and i still wait for it to happen.#because honestly like. i think deep down i am just convinced i will fail at anything i do when that shouldn't be what scares me.#what scares me should be never even allowing myself to fail because i never tried to do anything at all with myself or my life #like. wake the fuck up. get off your ass and put in the effort. learn some skills. gain independence and stability and discipline and do it #just live please i'm begging you just live so i can be happy don't i deserve to be happy... why am i not letting myself be happy #i'm literally keeping myself trapped in this negative feedback loop ON PURPOSE because teehee shiny toy #and it doesn't matter if the love is real it doesn't matter how i feel like i'm just using it as a distraction i can't say it's motivation #because it's barely motivated me at all. i have to start being realistic. 25 & just realizing you actually have to participate in your life #anyways. i've cried i've agonized i've pictured killing myself in 30 different ways. i think the only way i'm gonna feel better is #to just actually try this time without giving up. wish me luck

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sweet-like-hypoglycemia · 9 days

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It is time.

To prepare my body.

#text #good morning!!#going over a boys house today! wish me luck!#gonna watch old movies :') asshole knows how to get to meeeeeeeeeeeeee #which Abbott and Costello movie should be his first? i was considering Hold That Ghost or The Invisible Man? idk #also has never seen any Marx bros so... wtf #insane #but uh yeah i need to shower and paint my nails and scrub this BODYYYYY #im bringing a friggin charcuterie board cuz im a good guest #also weed but that goes without saying #gonna try not to get TOO high this time #frick #got like 3 hours #eeeewwwwe.sjksksodpdo

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davemustaine · 2 months

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insane that when my coworkers and i say fuck the corporate playlist and then commandeer the aux.... that's the only time customers are like "omg the music in here is so good"

#like ... one couple today was like 'what .. they usually dont let you guys play your own music??' and we were like no and they're like #'this is so perfect like this is what i expect would play in a hot topic' like. THANK YOU.#I work with my ex (insane fucking luck I know this. the chances) and we both have like such good taste in music #woof

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front-facing-pokemon · 1 year

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#okay i did not have to edit this one. score #shiftry #anyway i really don't like this pokémon or anything about it. SORRY but it's true it's really ugly and its mouth and the nose #and it has the same things i don't like about it that i talked about with nuzleaf. i just don't get it but this time it wasn't in psmd #so i'm not attached to it just by virtue of that. and well. that contributes to me not really liking it i suppose #ahh well. better luck next time TPC you can make a good grass/dark-type eventually (it's meowscarada) (it took 6 generations)#hi it's me from two weeks later like the actual day this post is going to post. i came back to edit the tags so i could respond to some #comments. crazy‚ i know! but i saw the tags on this one were a bit short so let's beef 'em up. the nuzleaf post got some comments #about the whole prosthetic memory thing. where i set reminders on my phone to do shit or else i will not do the shit #i literally have a reminder set for 2:30 PM today to eat food. or else i won't even do that i bet #and folks are saying it's a common ADHD experience and that i'm not a fail and i do appreciate it. i think i was joking a bit #i was probably just frustrated i had to edit the image after taking it but the gist is. i don't *think* i have ADHD? i do have autism #which i suspected for a loooooong while until i finally up and got diagnosed when i was fucking 21 years old. which is insane. so i wonder #if that's an experience that overlaps. i imagine it is bc they proooobably would've been able to tell me if i had ADHD‚ too #okay. i moved these tags over here from nosepass‚ actually‚ which is the pokémon i just queued up. so i'm gonna go remove them from there #see you in street fighter five everybody

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nobodybetterlookatme · 6 months

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Okay I'm not saying that this semester's students suck ass bc I'm not there to teach them, but isn't it just such a coincidence that the vast majority are failing so miserably and they don't have someone who will tutor them outside of class and go over notes and skills with them, while the previous semesters did have that and the majority passed? Super interesting stuff. Too bad we'll never know if things could've been different if they had just fucking paid me :)

#can you tell I'm peeved lmao #i went to one of the classes today just so i can keep it on my resume #and holy fuck #weeks into the semester and they should have the basics down #they do not #absolutely floundering #granted I'm sure I'm not actually the reason lmao #like yeah i helped a shit ton of students outside class too #but they probably could've passed without me #these new ones tho are awful #no drive no nothing just looking for others to blame for their own failures #i didn't even stay the whole time like i was planning #bc i found out that they hired four other fucking people for the program #who all have less experience than me #and have been with the program for a way shorter time than i have #who don't do half the extra shit i do #and don't get me wrong this isn't a slight at them they're all fully qualified #but why the fuck not hire me #like i genuinely am so pissed #have to email my supervisor but I'm too upset to make it sound civil #like fucking fine if you don't wanna pay me you never get to see me again #I'm not working ten hour days plus extra outside of class for nothing anymore that's insane #I'll keeping being a private tutor for the students but I'm not doing a single thing for the program without pay #i mean holy shit hiring at least four other people and not saying shit to me??#like fine that's fine fuck you you're getting an email ultimatum good luck finding someone else willing to do all that for free #i cried about it for like an hour and now I'm just mad lmao having a super normal one rn #anyway #not snz

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dont-offend-the-bees · 7 months

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We need better fucking care infrastructure. I should not be trusted with anyone's care ever 💛

#thing is caring for myself? I'm not GREAT at it but i can scrape by #i know my limits i know how much or little i need to survive i know that i can usually more or less bounce back after a tough time #i think if my life fell out from under me i could probably scrape it back even if i wound up doing a lot of couch surfing in the meantime #i genuinely don't know how I'll survive if i have to be fucking sole carer for someone #dad's on his way back now and he's been prescribed antibiotics and hopefully that's that #but at least a couple of times a year there's some shit like this #an awful cough or an infection or a fucking insane choice to like do some diy on the outside of the house standing on the windowsill #he fucking nearly chokes on his food once or twice a week #maybe he's just one of those cockroach type motherfuckers who'll never die no matter how the universe steps on him #but I'm fucking PISSED that he's taking that for granted and won't even sit and fucking talk to me about what happens when his luck runs out #I've been looking after mum alone for what four hours today and I'm already so tired and frustrated i wanna die #i am. a deeply impatient and unsociable creature.#i can be infinitely patient with friends! those are my fave people i chose to have them in my life I'd wait like a fucking mountain for them #mum and i were.... already sort of At Odds before all this started.#i'm the kid she never 100% really wanted and who never really 100% wanted to be here #and now we're stuck together and one day possibly sooner than any of us want it will be. just the two of us.#and i just. i don't know what that looks like. i really don't.#anyway. mental breakdown over hopefullly.#with a bit of luck dad and i actually fucking TALK before the next one #idk man. i never really knew what i wanted to do with my life but i thought I'd have time to figure it out #but maybe I'm just. the unqualified burnout with covid memory damage and a whole ass other human to care for #the exact thing i set out to avoid when i decided never to have kids #anyway. enough oversharing.#thank you anyone who's read my spiralling tag rambles in solidarity i love you #mr. bees speaks

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orcelito · 1 year

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The drive for chapter 12 has not abated

As soon as I am able I'm gonna be finishing that shit TODAY. So long as nothing truly catastrophic happens, then I should be able to post tonight

#speculation nation #itnl shit #not promising anything bc ive had some shit ass luck today #but. it Should happen. i want it to.#i have like 17 comments to reply to too on the last chapter hfkshfhshxkdbxkdb #which im gonna do Before i post the next chapter #it's honestly Wild how many comments ive been getting. the comment to kudos ratio is INSANE #might not be widely known yet but those that do know it Love it #anyways im pretty damn proud of what ive got going for chapter 12.#it's the first one where i feel like ive really gotten to display my writing skills. aside from chapter 1 I Guess #but even then chapter 1 was mostly experimental. you know what's Actually harder? writing Action.#coming up with action beats that are actually fun and exciting and then following through with prose #and word choice and sentence structure matters Even More than usual. bc those can directly affect the motion of the words themselves #thus affecting the perception of the actions being described #shit like that! it takes some practice and skill to do that & make it interesting #and i cant say im perfect at it. but im still pretty proud of what ive gotten done #and i am VERY excited to show it to u guys heheh

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flopbftheo · 1 year

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anyone who says that materialistic things don't bring you happiness LIES

#after uni i went downtown to actually find my mom a present for mother's day #which i did!#but i also made this insane thrift find (which i never do i suck at thrifting kinda)#like the perfect grandma cardigan with little flower stitching and everything #and then i wanted to replace my broken snoopy mug if anyone remembers that #but unfortunately it wasn't available anymore :(#BUT THEN #i found the prettiest mug ever handmade with little strawberries on it 🍓#and now i'm the happiest person on earth #oh and the summer dresses didn't fit me nicely unfortunately but i also found a super cute one in person today !!!!!#like my luck today is insane !!!!!#the universe loves me today #next stop today is the next flower shop bc i couldn't find an orchid for my empty pot that wasn't robbing me senseless #determined to find one under 10 bucks 😈#thank u for reading i don't think i've ever wrote tags this long on this blog wowie #but yeah my day has been successful so far !#000

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missingn000 · 1 year

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#attempting to write ALL DAY today. schedule cleared #wrote for most of the day on saturday too but as it turns out! 39.1 is insanely difficult 😁 even for me #26.1 is in my top 5 favorite scenes in tpg and i keep comparing everything in this section to it so T__T going a little insane #i DO like what i've written so far but. IT AINT MUCH #i will finish this chapter by the end of this week if it kills me. and tbh. it might #anyway #wish me luck #tpg

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inkykeiji · 1 year

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waaah happy first day of october everyone!!! 👻

#LET’S GET SPOOOOOOKY #i kinda wanna do halloween matchups again but like #what an insane amount of work HAHAHA #i did just hit another milestone again tho…………#i’ll think about it!!!#godspeed to everyone doing kinktober <3 #i like that kinktober has kind of evolved from being 31 short oneshots to a few longer fics for a lot of people #i think that’s rly cool #either way! good luck to everyone participating! c:#i am SO SLEEEEEEEPY ITS AWFUL 。ﾟ(ﾟﾉД｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡#also i did some major blog maintenance n reno last night!!!!!#revised my pinned n all of that so! check it out if u wanna! <3 #have a fab sunday everyone n do something spooky today to celebrate october!!!!!#clari chatters

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acesammy · 1 year

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Ugh man I am so not looking forward to work tomorrow

#My coworker didn’t show up today #and I know it’s bc she’s pissed #and I’m p sure it’s at me #and I know I haven’t been pulling my weight properly but also we’ve been like.. steady #not insanely busy #so she doesn’t need to go as hard as she does. I do what’s required of me #and on Wednesday she froze me out bc I didn’t immediately hop up to print versa and I made her do it #but it wasn’t fucking unreasonable of me to do that bc I only had /6/ to print #which probably took her like a total of 10 extra minutes #whereas she had So So Many #and idk how it worked out like that bc last week /I/ did it bc I had an INSANE amount of them to print #and it took me MORE THAN SIX FUCKING HOURS #she was gone for Three MAX and she was so pissed off at me #like??? Idek what to say??? I’m sorry???? I didn’t pass those orders by Adrianne /YOU/ just happened to take them #just like last week I happened to get orders for HUNDREDS of versa #I’m OBVIOUSLY not just passing by the versa orders #IT WAS LUCK #and guess what I got like 4 approved today #IT WAS GODDAMN LUCK #Anyways I did most of her approvals today and we are still caught up so I hope she doesn’t bitch at me tomorrow #I KNOW she’s just stressed but I’m gonna be real I was already barely holding it together at work on Wednesday #bc I got the news that my dog was dying the day before #like I /did/ cry on my lunch. I didn’t even make it the whole day #and I didn’t tell her bc I don’t want her pity but UGHHHH #even if I WASNT barely holding it together #it would not have been an unreasonable ask that she print the versa #after I did it last week #AND SPENT MORE THAN SIX HOURS DOING IT #lea speaks #vent

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futuregws · 2 years

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Lmao ofc you're critical of pedro pascal yet you stan the most basic white men. Your yt faves can commit hate crimes and you'll defend them but pedro doesn't update his who he's following on social media oh noooooo

Baby who pissed in your cereal??

Do you need help reading?? Bc I can help you with reading comprehension, it's a tough thing to learn so it gets even the best of us, I would advise, you take care of that tho don't want you embarrassing yourself like this again

#Bro pleaseee I've been reading so much stupid shit today you really don't wanna come at me bc I swear the filter I usually have is gone #Like for the love of God learn to fucking read before you go and be your nasty self to people that didn't do shit to you #And please tell me when was the last time I even thirsted over a white dude the only guy I've been talking about is pedro #And I certainly don't sound very critical but okay hun the only guys I've been thirsting over are pedro and another guy #Who is also not white so if you wanna use the list on my bio to attack me better luck next time bc that shit isn't updated #yall are insane #Pedro pascal

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starbuck · 2 years

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was marveling at how many new species i’ve added for my patch this year and thinking “that’s weird… i hammered it just as hard in past years…” only to check ebird and realize the most times i’d ever gone in a previous year was 38 and i’ve been 62 times so far this year and it’s only October 😂😂