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selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs · 2 years ago

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Kenji Miyazawa (self-aware)

Self-Aware! Kenji Miyazawa x GN!Reader

Warning: Platonic Yandere. OOC. English is my second language.

Becoming self-aware

🐄 When he realized, that his life wasn't real, Kenji hurries to the ADA office. He was confused and scared. Scared for his friends.

🐄 Kenji is a simple, cheerful and easygoing boy. And he loves his friends. Right now he must make sure they are safe.

🐄 Kenji finds his friends in the ADA office. No one knows what was happening.

🐄 Despite been scared, despite understanding, that his village and parents doesn't exist anymore, Kenji focused on helping his friends. He still has superhuman strength, it will come in handy.

🐄 Kenji helped to move Katai's belongings to ADA building. He helped with cleaning up the storage on the fifth floor. He helped with arranging sleeping places on third and fifth floor.

🐄 Kenji helped with bringing food supplies to the agency.

🐄 Kenji tried his best to help his friends.

🐄 And then, one day, he felt an entity's gaze on him.

____________________________________

Kenji wasn't angry at the entity. He believes, that if it was malicious, it would already attack them. But it was simply watching. Kenji thought, that, maybe, the entity was a little ghost that were lost and got curious, so they decide to stick around.

Then Atsushi was asking if they feel entity's presence. Before Kenji can answer, Kunikida and President Fukuzawa answer before him. While Kunikida's answer was short, President Fukuzawa also noticed, that the entity feel like something from out of this world. Later, Katai adds to this, that it feels like entity were looking at them behind the screen.

Kenji still thought, that you were harmless. He believes that you have nothing to do with this bizarre situation.

And then time resets.

And Kenji, once again, in the warehouse, where Dazai proclaim he wants to make Atsushi a part of ADA. Both Dazai and Atsushi looked peaceful.

__________________________________

When they start feeling your presence

🐄 Kenji was a little bit taken aback by time reset. But, it seems, his friends start feeling better. Atsushi was calm again, Dazai looked happier, Tanizaki siblings looked better.

🐄 Kenji still feel your presence. But still, he wasn't scared of you.

🐄 They don't have a proof that empty streets of Yokohama and current madness is your fault.

🐄 During Black Lizards' attack on ADA office, Kenji heard the voice.

"Kenji [||||||||] strong. He looked [|||||||||||||||] ray of sunshine"

🐄 After your words, Kenji feels like he was, once again, in his village on a warm and sunny day.

🐄 Kenji smiles. He knew that you are a good entity.

🐄 Soon Kunikida looks as confident as usual. He was talking about the entity with warmth in his voice.

🐄 Then Ranpo finished his investigation. And Yosano stop been always on edge.

"I finished the investigation. It seems, that our entity is a simple human. Like we are. They don't have ability. There are no abilities in their world. And they have no idea, that we can hear them."

🐄 Kenji was glad, that he was right and you aren't bad. But he wished, he hears your voice again.

🐄 And then, Atsushi and Kenji were investigating a car explosion.

_______________________________________

"Whether in a town or a village, whether toward a cow or a person… If you're sincere toward others, they'll respond in kind. That approach has yet to fail me."

Kenji heard the voice.

"sunshine boy" "adorable" "so kind"

"Kenji, I wish there were more people like you. Everyone need more kindness in their lives. I wish I have someone like you in my life."

Kenji feels like someone pet his hair.

[*In reality, you pet manga panel with Kenji on it.*]

_______________________________________

🐄 Kenji will think that it will be nice to see you in person. To become friends with you.

🐄 When President Fukuzawa and Boss Mori proclaim, that Armed Detective Agency and Port Mafia will work together to find a way out of this world, Kenji will do his best to help everyone. He wanted to go to your world. To see the nature. To see you.

And then, one day, the purple moon shined above Yokohama.

When you installed BSD Mayoi Inu Kaikitan

🐄 Kenji's cards will have the highest attack.

"Go, Kenji, go! Let's clear this stage!"

"Your card skill works so good with Chuuya's"

"Kenji's Rainy Season card is so beautiful"

🐄 When BSD gang will gain access to the rest of your phone, Kenji (with Katai's help) will browse the Internet, looking at photos of nature and villages.

🐄 Kenji (with Katai's help) will recommend you videos about nature.

🐄 If you like watching documentaries, Kenji will accompany you.

🐄 Kenji is planning to create a small farm when they reach your world. So you can eat natural products.

🐄 He wants you to be healthy. You are his (future) friend. You are a human being. You deserve kindness.

_______________________________________

You finish watching a video about lotus flowers. It was beautiful and interesting.

You saw a notification from BSD Mayoi. You got another note in your Gift Box. A note from Kenji with some evolution materials attached to it.

"[Y/N], please, don't forget to go for a walk today. Get some sunlight. And don't forget to smile. Kenji Miyazawa"

You smile and, while getting ready for a walk, choose Kenji's card and pet his chibi sprite.

"Thanks for the advice, Kenji. I will go for a walk. And, of course, I will smile."

You didn't notice that Kenji's eyes light up.

#bungou stray dogs au #self-awareau #self-awarebsd #bsd x gender neutral reader #bsd #bungou stray dogs #gender neutral reader #bsd anime #yandere #platonic #Self-Aware Kenji Miyazawa #kenji miyazawa #bsd x reader

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s3raphimssins · 1 year ago

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Armed detective agency x reader

Where the whole detective agency are on a vacation ,camping. In the place they are camping, there is a haunted house and somewhere in the house there is a statue. Obviously dazai decides that they explore the house in teams,the first team who finds the statue wins. So the reader is paired with dazai:3 you continue. (BTW reader and dazai are besties though dazai feels something for the reader that's not the concern tho.) the reader,she hates horrors^^

➼Authors note: Ofc I can! I love this idea and I started writing right away but I'm so devastated I wrote a whole fic of atleast 1k words :( and it discarded and I've been mourning over it. I'm so sorry it took long I have exams! I'm just really sad about the fic 😭💪🏻

➼Pairings: dazai x reader

➼Summary: an unexpected trip to a haunted house with dazai, turns into something out of a movie

YOU AND ME ALWAYS FOREVER

You and Dazai were unpacking necessities when you heard Yosano from beside you sigh tiredly and say "finally a well deserved break". "did we really have to come here out of all the places" Ranpo whined eating his donuts he insisted to bring. "i think camping is a nice idea! we can have smores!" you chirped. "speaking of smores about the fire Atsushi and Kyouka arent back yet with the wood. we need it to start the fire" Tanizaki said with Naomi on his arms. "i can go find some too!" Kenji said happily. As if on cue Atsushi and Kyouka both came running to the lot.

"Guys! we found a mysterious house which has a sign outside it has some statue carved on it with a question mark?" Atsushi said panting catching his breath when while Kyouka drops the wood off to tanizaki. "entertainment!" ranpo stood up happily as his donuts were finished. "we have a scheduled plan to stick to? And right now its time to set up a tent". "no~ Kunikida kun we should all explore the house who knows what we may find! maybe a cute lady again willing to kill herself too~?" dazai teased. "oh shut up" you groaned elbowing him. "atsushi what type of house is it?" you asked maybe some people still were living in it. " it wasnt new at all it was old and rotten, really big though and electricity and water had been cut off when me and Kyouka tried the lights at the enterance".

"its...a...haunted...house?" you said worried, swallowing a lump down your throat. "i doubt its haunted but yes its old" Atsushi said before trying to convince Kunikida. Dazai walked to you and said " 'name' are you scared~ you looked pale when he mentions haunted". you snapped back to reality and said " so what?! ive heard many stories that go about the same story and they do not end up well!" you said defensively. " im here with you after all, do you really have to be scared". you stared "i dunno youre unpredictable you'll proabably make it scarier" he laughed at that before everyone was led by atsushi to the house.

Ranpo and Dazai deduced that the sign meant they had to find a statue somewhere in the house and it could be valuable. Dazai suggested everyone split into teams of 2 and exclaimed "team who finds the statue first wins!!". The teams were, Ranpo and Kunikida, Naomi and Tanizaki, Yosano and Kenji, Atsushi and Kyouka and You and Dazai. Everyone and split up until no one was in sight, Dazai inquired that you guys start upstairs since its more likely to be there. There was no light, the only source of light you all had was a flashlight in Dazais hands. You were scared. You kept seeing things. You just felt like something touched you on you shoulder when you looked back to see Dazai holding a torch to his face "boo~" "AAH WHAT THE HELL?! DONT DO THAT!" you jabbed his arm and he laughed teasing you.

You both went into some sort of library and this house was HUGE, atleast 3 stories and really spacious with alot of rooms. Dazai was skimming through some books while you kept looking behind your back. That was when you saw something standing in the corner. You shook Dazais arm and he looked over to you "yes donna-" "is there something standing there..." you said paranoid and pale youre fingers began trembling. He shined the light there and there was nothing. "its nothing 'name' dont be scared im here~" you would have told him to shut up only if you werent so scared so Dazai sighed and held your hand before saying "the statue is on the 3rd floor corner room, its quite dark there so close your eyes, ill guide you through" he said actually serious.

You looked back at the corner you saw something at and then at Dazai and nodding shuddering. You shut your eyes and Dazai quickly led you through squeezing your hand reassuringly some times. Though it seemed Ranpo and Kunikida had the same idea when both of the teams reached the spot where the statue is. You were still holding his hand looking around when you felt something up your leg which made you jump. "donna you dont have any reason to be scared anymore were not alone~". you didnt care you just wnated to go back out. You couldnt take the creepy aura from the house and soon enough everyone gathered outside to tell about the statue and whatever else they found interesting. Like atsushi and Kyouka found an old piano.

Everyone was heading back to the camp site but you didnt realize Dazai was still holding your hand but slowly you stopped shaking and sighed "thank god we didnt die or you and me would always be forever if we got killed by a ghost!" he laughed at your comment and said " you sound it like its a bad thing" you looked at him dead pan and then shuddered, "just forget it this was enough terror for the day". He smiled he couldnt help but feel something, something he never felt, he liked it. he repeated "you and me...always forever..?"

#dazai x reader #bsd imagine #bsd #bsd scenarios #dazai osamu #bungo stray dogs #armed detective agency #bsd x reader #dazai scenarios #dazai imagine #bsd dazai #bsd imagines #bungo stray dogs x reader #bsd x you #dazai x you #dazai x y/n

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luvfy0dor · 1 year ago

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Bsd and Book Tropes/Types!

╰┈➤ Atsushi, Dazai, Kunikida, Ranpo, Yosano, Akutagawa, Chuuya, Higuchi, Fyodor, Nikolai, Sigma

CW: None!

Description - Book types and tropes I think various bsd characters would enjoy. These are just some of my opinions, if you feel I've incorrectly characterized any of them please tell me! Also, this is based off of the main storyline, I haven't read Stormbringer, 55 Minutes, etc yet.

Atsushi Nakajima ☆

╰┈➤ Comic books, found family, childhood friends to lovers ☑

I feel like these are a no brainer, but I think Atsushi, if given the chance to read them as a child, would have really liked comics and grown up with them. I think he would like super hero/action stories. Specifically because of the Odasaku-Man show/series/franchise in BSD Wan. He'd probably enjoy DC, Marvel, The Avengers, etc.

Atsushi, to me at least, seems like the type of person to really want to connect to whatever he's reading and be moved by it. I think found family is probably a big thing for him because of Dazai bringing him into the agency and all. I think he likes sentimental and happier story lines that can make you cry solely because they have to end at some point.

Atsushi would probably like to watch the characters grow up together, probably torn apart by some unforseen event and eventually rekindling. Like I said, I think he would really like sentimental stuff, and seeing people rejoice and fall in love is probably really heart warming to him.

Osamu Dazai ☆

╰┈➤ Poetry, soulmates, MAJOR plot twists ☑

To be honest, I feel like if Dazai were to sit and read anything, it would most likely be a poem. I don't think Dazai is the type of guy to analyze poetry for fun, but I think he has a subconscious habit of doing it. Either he's pretty into it or he's skimming through it and tossing it to the side the second he's bored.

If I had to pick a romance trope that Dazai would like, I do think it'd be soulmates. Or maybe like, right person wrong time. I think he would like the angst of it should the book take a turn and end in tragedy, or he might also enjoy a fulfilling and satisfying ending. I think he likes the idea of two people being destined to be together, one soul two bodies type thing, you know? ;]

I think he likes major plot twists but only if they catch him off guard,which is probably pretty rare. He likes the feeling of surprise when a book takes an unexpected turn.

Doppo Kunikida ☆

╰┈➤ Slow burn, historical fiction ☑

Kunikida likes slow burn because it's something he can read through for a while. I think he likes trilogies and series, especially if he really enjoys the storyline and characters. He probably likes the reliability of being able to pick the same thing up for a while after dealing with whatever nonsense takes place at the agency.

I think he likes reading about things that he has at the very least surface level knowledge about. He likes when authors stay true to the actual events while creating a storyline around it. Like, for example, a love story that takes place between two soldiers in a war. So long as it stays true to the actual events, I think he would read it.

Edogawa Ranpo ☆

╰┈➤ The "Chosen One", Found Family ☑

Ranpo definitely has a hard time finding books that he'll actually enjoy. I can't remember if he said he did or didn't like mystery books though because they were to easy for him to solve? I don't remember, so I'm not gonna include mystery books for him. I think he would really like books where the main character is a "Chosen One" though. I don't really know why, it just seems like the type of story he'd sit through while simultaneously making fun of it.

"This guy thinks he's so special all because he can ____! I can do that too."

I think he'd also like found family because, like Atsushi, he found his family in the detective agency. He and Yosano are like sister and brother and Fukuzawa is like his father. I think they would have a special place in his heart for sure.

Yosano Akiko ☆

╰┈➤ Bad Girl/Good Boy, one of us is famous ☑

I think Yosano would feel as though the good girl/bad boy trope is way over done. She would probably be happy to see it switched up once in a while. I think she really likes the contrast of the two types of personalities and characters, but she also wants to see the characters be smart rather than immature or stupid. She probably wouldn't want to read the same stereotypical "Character A trips and falls, landing right on top of Character B." She likes when stories can stand out and be unique.

She also probably like the idea of one of the characters in the relationship being able to uphold themselves without their partner, that independence seems like something she'd find interesting to read. I think she would really take interest in the plot and how it could come out, maybe angsty because of the famous ones busy schedule? Maybe it ends with the famous one's career coming to retirement because they felt it's more important to make time for their partner? I think she'd find all of the possibilities interesting.

Ryunosuke Akutagawa ☆

╰┈➤ "I hate everyone in the world but you", childhood friends to lovers, nonfiction ☑

Honestly, I have like, a big list of tropes in front of me and it was really hard to pick for him because none of them really seemed very him to me. If you catch him reading a romance book though, it's probably "I hate everyone but you" or childhood friends to lovers. I think they could both go hand in hand for him. The "I hate everyone but you" trope reminds me of like, only being able to trust this one person thoroughly. Trust like that is gained through years of companionship such as childhood friendships into adolescence and adulthood. I think his childhood probably would have an effect on this preference.

"We've already been together so long, you know me and I know you and there is trust. Why would I ever want to start all that over?" Type of thing.

While I think he doesn't mind fiction occasionally, I think he prefers to read about real things. It's more serious.

Nakahara Chuuya ☆

╰┈➤ Workplace romance, second chance romance, secret romance ☑

Chuuya seems like the type of guy to like romance and moderate thrill, so I think he leans towards romance stories that could build up suspense or get the characters into a little bit of trouble. As for office romance, I think he likes the idea of falling in love with someone in a place he kind of has to be every day, that person making his day better. It also means he would get to be close to his s/o and I think he'd knowing that they're okay, which is why I think he'd like that trope. The thrilling part is that maybe it's against a code of conduct in the office? Maybe they get caught dating, what happens after that?

Second chance romance to me is exciting because you get to see characters learn and grow from their mistakes, and I think Chuuya finds acknowledgement on wrongdoings really important. But characters might also mess up again, which is always interesting to watch go down.

Secret romance is self explanatory on the thrill factor. It can give you so many questions that are most likely answered in the book itself, like why is it a secret?

(I also think he enjoys super hero comics but wouldn't admit it in fear of being called immature because of that Odasaku-Man scene in bsd wan)

Ichiyō Higuchi ☆

╰┈➤ Workplace romance, YA rom-com, bad boy/good girl ☑

She definitely likes the idea of workplace romance because of her massive little crush on Akutagawa. Like Chuuya I think she'd like the idea of being around your s/o even while having to work, whether the work is boring or not. I think her crush also influences the bad boy/good girl thing, although I don't know if I'd call her a good girl. I think she would like to consider herself a good girl.

YA rom-com also seems like her thing, like she would read it while laying in her stomach, kicking her feet, twirling her hair, and giggling.

Fyodor Dostoevsky ☆

╰┈➤ Philosophy, poetry, life's hardships ☑

Oh boy. He doesn't even get tropes, I don't think he'd read fiction. I do think he'd read philosophy books though, like he's probably read up on Confusious and Aristotle or something like that. Even if he doesn't agree with the philosopher he's reading about, I think he'd find it interesting.

He definitely appreciates poetry, HE'S the type of guy to analyze it in his free time. I think he'd find poetry beautiful when done right.

Because the real Dostoevsky grew up poor, I think bsd Dostoevsky has an appreciation for books written about struggles an author has faced. Fyodors past hasn't been mentioned in the main storyline of bsd atleast, so I'm just going assume he grew up poor until other information comes out. I think hearing about other people facing the same thing he did in childhood might give him a sense of humanity. He said during his "happy group counseling hour" that only he and Dazai could understand each other because of their levels of intelligence. Maybe seeing other people having something in common with him would be something he would like.

Nikolai Gogol ☆

╰┈➤ Independent mc ☑

Nikolai doesn't seem like the type to read a lot, but because of his ideology associated with freedom, I think he'd like books with a strong lead character. I don't think he'd like books with main characters that rely heavily on other people or have a bland personality outside of their significant other. He'd like characters that solve their own problems and obtain their own goals.

Sigma ☆

╰┈➤ Magazines, cook books, friends to lovers ☑

I think Sigma reads like, the people magazine so he can understand what's going on in pop culture and have some knowledge of what's going on. He probably likes knowing what's trending. I think he'd also like the "Home Decor" sections of the magazines or like the scratch and sniff parts. I don't know why, I just do.

He'd also probably read cookbooks occasionally and memorize recipes when he's not memorizing every detail about his customers.

I think Sigma would find romance stories endearing, specifically friends to lovers. Kind of similar to Akutagawas, I think he would like the idea of already having that trust built through friendship. Because Sigma is so naive and how much he's been used, he likes reading about characters who already have a good friendship that is built on reliability and trust. That friendship turning into a romance eventually.

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underthetree845 · 1 year ago

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ADA Members as High School Students- Headcannons

All the characters are of high school age, except for Fukuzawa who is a teacher.

I might do the older ADA members as teachers eventually, but I wanted to focus on them all as students for now.

Includes: Dazai Osamu, Kunikida Doppo, Ranpo Edogawa, Atsushi Nakajima, Kyoka Izumi, Miyazawa Kenji, Yosano Akiko, Fukuzawa Yukichi

Cws: mentions of suicide (because it's dazai), mentions of school fights, school life, mentions of bullying, school counseling

Dazai Osamu:

Would mess with the underclassmen by sending them on a wild goose chase for the nonexistent school elevator or something like that.

Takes advantage of his friends and always gets them to do his assignments for him (that habit obviously carried into adulthood).

Proudly holds the record for the most unexcused tardies in one school year.

The teacher keeps trying to call on him to answer a question when he seems like he’s slacking off but Dazai always answers correctly, that devilish little unapologetic grin on his face.

Literally never studies.

The teachers can’t tell if he cheats or is just really intelligent, but if he were cheating, they wouldn’t be able to catch him.

(He doesn’t cheat by the way, but he never explicitly denies it).

Has been confessed to at least three times, (he scared them away when he asked if they’d be willing to commit double suicide with him).

The guidance counselors keep trying to schedule a meeting with him to talk about his “suicidal tendencies,” but then he just shows up on mushrooms or something and they’re like “Nevermind.”

Drama queen.

Used to be part of this questionable after school club (Mori was the faculty advisor) that got disbanded.

Pulls pranks on the faculty and other students (mostly Chuuya), particularly ones he has some reason to hold spite against.

Never gets caught.

Smooth liar.

Completely up with the gossip too.

Those career path quizzes never know what to do with him, he gets a jumble of results.

The underclassmen have no idea who Oda is, but they know you should never bring him up around Dazai.

Lots of rumors circulating as to why he wears his bandages.

Probably hides Kunikida’s glasses so he can’t see the board.

Surprisingly good at writing, language arts is his best subject.

Kunikida Doppo:

Constantly threatening to snitch on Dazai but never does.

This audio.

The kid that asks for clarification on assignments and ends up reminding the teacher that they meant to give homework. Doesn’t see the problem with it.

Does. not. condone. bullying. He’ll push up his glasses and emotionally destroy the perpetrators before filing a fancy report to the faculty advisor.

Keeps a planner notebook. Very meticulous and organized, he’s proud of it.

Probably class rep.

Takes way too many things way too seriously.

Has never missed a deadline. Ever.

Every single one of his pencils is somehow always sharpened and perfect.

Strongly believes that wooden pencils are superior to mechanical ones.

Good at math, but also art. He sees the canvas as a kind of graph, does particularly well with landscapes.

Very serious about getting proper nutrients from what he eats and drinks throughout the day, he plans his lunches for the week ahead of time.

Does very well in debate class too.

Always perfectly in uniform, scolds Dazai when he has his tie loose or didn’t button up his blazer or something like that.

Ranpo Edogawa:

Does favors for people when it gets close to Valentine’s Day to make sure he’ll get some chocolates.

Do I even need to say it- ALWAYS snacking in class.

Coerces as much free food out of other students as possible.

Eventually they pick up on his game and stop feeding him.

Snitches on people flawlessly in the middle of class, the culprit fuming, the teacher dumbfounded. Maybe he can get away with snacks once in a while.

When people ask him to help them study he usually just redirects them to Atsushi.

That kid that’s always leaning his chair back way too far but never falls.

The faculty has basically given up on punishing him. After school detention?- more sleeping time. Extra homework?- doesn’t even break a sweat.

Knows exactly who is cheating on the test, gets offered bribes from both the students cheating so he doesn’t tell on them and the teachers who want to know who it is.

That one kid that just shoves looseleaf crumpled paper into their backpack, seems like they’ve never used a binder in their life. Somehow turns everything in just fine.

Says he doesn’t have gum on him when he’s literally chewing a piece.

Always goes and visits/annoys Fukuzawa when he can. Fukuzawa actually doesn’t mind and Ranpo enjoys getting to talk to his favorite teacher.

Doesn’t even check the board when tests results come out, he already knows what he got, and can easily guess the others’ scores too.

Most people couldn’t actually tell you what his eye color is.

Fukuzawa is the only teacher Ranpo will actually take a lecture from seriously, the other administrators have to call him over when they need to scold the boy.

Atsushi Nakajima:

The only one who did their part in the group project.

Always offering to help the teachers, tutors other students, etc. etc.

An angel, really. Akutagawa is the only one able to make him upset.

Extremely apologetic, would probably help the janitor clean up if he ever accidentally made a mess.

Probably tried out for a part in a school production at least once.

Turning heads from around the room when he reveals that he plays piano.

So shy about it though, he probably didn’t even mean to say it.

Dazai gave him a pep talk before his first performance.

After that, he starts to come out of his shell in music class, does well in music theory too.

Would literally die if he ever received a love letter or anything of the sort.

Doesn’t like to share who his favorite teachers are out of fear of hurting their feelings.

Definitely has a bond with at least one facilitator, is probably friends with the janitor and cafeteria cooks.

Wouldn’t hesitate to give his umbrella to someone if it were raining after school.

Found a blue-eyed kitten on his walk home once. It’s his now, he kept it, and Dazai absolutely adores it.

Always has index cards or post-it notes on him to quickly write something down or give someone a piece of information.

Makes specific playlists for studying different subjects.

Kyoka Izumi:

When she entered school, there was a lot of talk about her past; it ranged from what happened to her parents to saying she’d kill you if you even looked at her. Became a social outcast. :(

As soon as Atsushi caught wind of the rumors, he immediately shut them down, jumping to her defense whenever he could.

Now she’ll death glare at anyone being mean to him.

Doesn’t understand the concept of a school dance, she only went because the others seemed excited about it.

Actually ended up having a great time, replaying the fond memories in her head the next day.

A sucker for bunny keychains. She has the one on her phone, yes, but also a few on her backpack and maybe pencil pouch.

Atsushi gave one of them to her for her birthday, she doesn’t even know how he found out when her birthday is.

She refuses to allow her phone to be confiscated (for obvious reasons).

Doesn’t use it in class or when she’s not supposed to or anything like that, but if a teacher is having a particularly bad day and decides to try to take it from her, her grip is unassailable.

Fukuzawa knows what happened to her, so he usually steps in to diffuse the situation and get the teacher to let it go.

She finds watercolor time in art class pleasantly therapeutic.

The only one who helps Atsushi with the group assignment.

Fukuzawa’s favorite student. They get each other.

Kenji Miyazawa:

Literally every teacher wishes they had him in their class.

His only issue is that he keeps forgetting you have to wear close-toed shoes to school, he can never remember to change them.

So many athletic teams want him to join them, but he remains loyal to the garden club.

Has impressed the school nurse with his home remedies.

Has (unknowingly) talked down a few fights.

Smiles so brightly in his school photo every year.

Does well in the environmental/botanical portion of science class.

Incapable of holding a grudge.

Really dislikes doing dissections.

The meals he brings from home are the BEST- everyone always wants to try a bite. Kunikida has to shoo the others away so Kenji doesn’t give away his entire meal.

One time at a school soccer match, Kenji was watching from the sidelines with some friends and one of the players kicked the ball his way. He got hit smack in the face and fell over, everyone thought he was out cold and was ready to call an ambulance, but he just stood up and brushed it off like it was nothing. His nose bled a little, but he assured everyone that he felt fine.

They had him checked out by the school nurse that day just to be sure. Yosano had a look at him too.

Returns every single pen and pencil he borrows.

Had never seen mechanical pencils before coming to Yokohama, was absolutely fascinated.

Yosano Akiko:

No one actually knows what the inside of her bag or locker looks like.

“When you first meet her and wonder why she’s single and now you’re three months into the relationship and you know why.” (No Yosano hate, I just feel like this has happened to people who thought she looked approachable at first glance).

Keeps a hairbrush and bobby pins in her bag.

Checks every box, the prime example of that friend everyone needs. She’ll stick up for you, provide you with things you need, is really nice to talk to, gives AMAZING advice.

Some people are afraid of her, which is kind of fair.

Hands-on learning experiments in science class are her favorite.

Actually enjoys dissections.

The butterfly clip is OFF LIMITS. Absolutely no one is allowed to touch it.

Hardly ever has to use a calculator, she excels at quick mental math and long division problems.

Completely prepared to perform CPR, the Heimlich maneuver, etc. at all times.

I feel like she would keep houseplants on a shelf somewhere. Simple ones, dark leaves and pretty blossoms.

Professor Mori, the psychology and human behavior teacher, is the only person in the entire school who can give her the chills.

Has known she wants to be a doctor since the beginning of her school life.

The teachers have tried to encourage her to at least consider creating a plan B, but she refuses.

Probably critiques the school nurse and their methods so hard. “No, the gauze needs to be tighter than that if you actually want to stop the bleeding.” “Apply heat if you want the muscles to relax, not cold!” “Do you even know how to use an epi-pen?!”

I feel like Yosano can sing, she would probably do well in choir.

Could be persuaded to sing onstage for a school production if provided a good enough reason. I’m just saying it’s not completely off the table for her.

Fukuzawa Yukichi:

The only student that knows his complete backstory is Ranpo, and he won’t tell anyone else because Fukuzawa pays him off with snacks in exchange.

I could only really see him as a literary teacher.

One time he accidentally mentioned that he has a cat in class. Every student erupted into a series of exclamations and demanded pictures.

Now they get him cat-themed gifts on holidays and for his birthday, the man could not be happier.

Naomi likes to come talk to him about random thoughts she has, things her brother does, she treats him like another one of her friends.

Has the scariest serious voice, it’ll make any student shut their mouth.

Likes to eat his lunches outside.

Kyoka is his favorite student. Ranpo too, of course, but Fukuzawa and Kyoka hold a special kinship.

A handful of students can sense the mutual war between Fukuzawa and Mori, the psychology professor across the hall. (I considered anatomy or something like that for Mori, I just feel like psyche would be more fitting for him to actually teach).

Fukuzawa and Mori are the faculty members that have been at the school the longest.

One time Atsushi brought Fukuzawa a warm turvis of his favorite tea because he “just looked a little tired yesterday” and that’s when he knew that he would be keeping his job for a long time.

Always cooks his own meals and brings them for lunch, would rather die than have to survive off of instant ramen or something like that.

His class is the only one ever completely behaved during the fire drills.

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denjilvr · 2 years ago

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do they drink enough water?

synopsis: do the bungou stray dogs characters drink enough water? most likely not

author’ note: i like my silly little headcanons, they’re the best content you can get from me as nobody’s heard from me for months! i have no ideas, gimme. anyways!!!!

ada

atsushi: he tries to drink enough most days but he gets headaches because man is dehydrated

dazai: fuck no, absolutely not. next question.

kunikida: he drinks the perfect amount of water. no more, no less. this man is ideally hydrated

yosano: queen is hydrated and her skin is glowing

ranpo: no. i personally believe he only drinks soda and juice

kyoka: hmmm i want to say yes but i feel like the answer is no…

kenji: yes! he reminds kyoka to drink water and brings her juice and snacks

tanizaki: he always has a waterbottle that naomi mooches off and refills, so yes

fukuzawa: most of the time, yes! he reminds the others to drink water, too :)

port mafia

chuuya: it’s a roulette game with him, some days he’s thriving, other days he’s dehydrated, messy, and on the brink of passing out

akutagawa: GOD NO. he is a disaster and often is forced to take sips from the communal water bottle

higuchi: she’s trying her best, wants to bring a water bottle to work but forgets. asks to take sips from the communal water bottle

gin: yes! has a glass of iced water in the morning, and keeps a hydroflask! lets others mooch off of her, too. communal water bottle holder <3

tachihara: he probably has to drink about a gallon of water a day with all of his surgeries, so he’s properly hydrated!

hirotsu: well hydrated and keeps a balanced diet. he’s a healthy old man!

kouyou: the goddess herself stays hydrated, it’s the secret to her perfect skin

mori: he drinks red wine and i hope he dehydrates and dies

oda: not only is he hydrated, but he also reminds dazai and ango to drink water. he’s also taking care of, like, six orphans. he’s doing amazing

decay of angels

fyodor: rat man. anemic. terrorist. dehydrated. the only water he’s had in the last week was from a mystery, crinkled up plastic water bottle in the back of the DOAs fridge

nikolai: he really likes juice… so i guess there’s water in that

sigma: he has maybe a cup of water a day, or drinks water only when he starts to feel dizzy. dehydrated king

bram: he drinks nothing but the finest blood, hasn’t had a drop of water in over 200 years

#bungou stray dogs #atsushi nakajima #osamu dazai #bsd #bsd hcs #kunikida doppo #edogawa ranpo #kyoka izumi #chuuya nakahara #tachihara michizou #gin akutagawa #akutagawa ryonosuke #fyodor dostoevsky #nikolai gogol #sigma #hydration is important

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azapofinspiration · 1 year ago

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Currently no ideas sparking for my final AU prompt, but the multiple mentions of Daemon AU made me start thinking about what daemons the cast of BSD might have.

Armed Detective Agency

Here people have their daemons accompany them without fear and they often help assist during cases.

Atsushi - a tiger (he never understood why until he discovered his ability nor the disbelieving look he got when he didn’t understand how a white tiger could be following them)

Dazai - an otter (slippery and able to get out of situations, clever with tools, frequently in water)

Kunikida - a dog (a shepherd like in BSD Wan; loyal and tries to keep everything together)

Ranpo - a Raven (corvids are some of the smartest birds and given who his rival is I couldn’t help it)

Yosano - a monkey (maybe a capuchin, it’s another set of helping hands for her work and helps detect emotional distress)

Kenji - unsettled at the start but ends up as a cow (can be ridden into battle)

Tanizaki - a chameleon (tends to blend into the background along with him)

Naomi - a badger (looks cute but is stubborn and will claw out your eyes if threatened)

Kyouka - a rabbit (makes a very good therapy pet but it can bite and scratch if in danger)

Fukuzawa - a crane (connections to martial arts but also tends to symbolize longevity, peace, and innocent victims of war)

Port Mafia

Member of the PM are trained to withstand distance with their daemons as they’re often considered liabilities in the field. To know a person’s daemon is a sign of great trust (how Dazai and Chuuya know each others’ daemons) or a sign of great confidence (Mori and Kouyou don’t hide theirs).

Akutagawa - a hedgehog (spiny but cute; he refuses to bring with him because it’ll damage his reputation)

Chuuya - a fox (clever and sneaky, lots of different noises, technically in the canidae family like dogs)

Gin - a snake (quick and sharp and able to blend into their surroundings)

Higuchi - a squirrel (quick in several different ways and a bit of a hoarder)

Tachihara - a Hawk (specifically a zone-tailed one, mimics a Turkey vulture to trick its prey)

Hirotsu - a lizard (live a long time, protective scales, willing to do what must be done to survive)

Kajii - an echidna (somehow they tend to survive wild fires and extreme heat)

Kouyou - a swan (beautiful and elegant but very territorial and surprisingly strong)

Mori - a snapping turtle (durable and often lures in prey with a seemingly easy target before devouring it themself; tricky)

Also, I feel like daemons would also be able to use their person’s ability to an extent.

#bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #daemon au #armed detective agency #port mafia #my posts #my post

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knockyasocksoff2022 · 1 year ago

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Executive Dazai

(A/N: R.I.P. me trying to write comedy! Also sorry for any typos sometimes I miss things. Anyway let's gooo)

Under cut due to length (4,154 words)

Atsushi's P.O.V

"Gah! Where is that slacker!?" I hear Kunikida-san mumbling from his desk. He holds a stack of reports, and I walk over to offer to help fill some.

He sees me, an angry look in his eyes. I know it isn't for me but it's still intimidating. "Yah, Atsushi-kun!" I can't help jumping at his raised voice.

"Y-yes Kunikida-san?"

"Have you seen Dazai recently?" His phrasing is formal as usual but his tone is full of all the anger and frustration and exasperation that comes from working with the suicidal detective.

"No . . . you don't think something's happened to him, do you?"

He huffs, adjusting his eyeglasses and crosses something out in his notebook. (There goes his schedule.) "No, I'm sure that he is fine, but these reports need to be filled."

"Oh, okay then. I can just do Dazai-san's report for now."

"You are too kind Atsushi, you shouldn't enable him."

"Well, I-I . . . I just want to help out is all."

Kunikida-san shakes his head but lets me take the reports.

—-------- Three Days later —-------

It's been a week since anyone has heard anything from Dazai-san. I trust Kunikida-san, but I'm starting to get worried for my mentor. Kunikida-san is not worried . . . he's FURIOUS!!!

At first he ignored it, saying that that fool can do whatever the hell he wants and it's no matter to him, but the paperwork is piling up and most of the other members who've finished all of their work, paper or otherwise, are on vacation this week.

Yosano is going to some spa resort with one of her friends.

Ranpo is going to Disney World with Poe.

Kenji is visiting his grandparents back in his hometown, for the summer festival. He promised to bring back the biggest watermelon he can find.

The Tanazakis are going camping.

Kunikida doesn't know how to take breaks.

I'm helping him because I have nowhere to go and not enough money even if I did have somewhere to go. -^T-T^-

Dazai-san is nowhere to be seen.

"Have you just tried calling Dazai-san?"

"You think he picks up?" I can tell his question is a rhetorical one.

"He- he hung up on you? But . . .?"

"He has no respect, the useless fool."

"Oh." I don't really know what I should say to that. "You know Kunikida-san, maybe, you could just go to his house or something."

His head perks up, "Ah yes, Atsushi-kun! That is a great idea! Why didn't I think of that?" He adjusts his glasses and I smile at the praise. Kunikida's face falls. "But we don't have his address."

"Really? I thought everyone lived in the dorms?"

"No, not Dazai. For all I know he sleeps on a futon under a big tree in some park."

"Whaaa!"

"Or a shack, maybe a garbage bin, I bet he finds that nice and cosy."

"Dazai-san is homeless!" I say, not believing the words.

Kunikida-san only laughs, "Pffft! That idiot is richer than all of us, of course he has a home. I just don't know where it is. Well . . . it wouldn't be surprising if he just chooses to be homeless though. I wonder . . ." He opens his laptop, searching for a list of known street vagrants/beggars in Yokohama.

"Damn! Nothing. Now where could that bastard possibly live?"

We're both very invested at this point so we dig up the company employee records, thankfully Kunikida-san insists on keeping neat, meticulous ones.

"Oh, look at this. An address not far from here."

"Let's go." Kunikida-san is already out the door, he looks ready to beat the crap out of Dazai-san when we find him.

—

We pull up at the small olive green house. It doesn't look like where someone rich would live but it looks cosy (certainly more so than a bin).

Kunikida-san jumps out of the car and starts pounding on the door. "Dazai, open up you sorry brat! We know you're in there! Come out RIGHT THIS INSTANT SO I CAN BEAT YOU WITH MY NOTEBOOK!!!" I can practically see the idealist's veins bulging.

The door opens and out steps . . . an old lady.

Kunikida-san and I both flush tomato red with embarrassment.

"Well, hello. Aren't you two girls pretty? I don't have my wallet just now. If you'll give me a moment to get it, I'd be happy to buy some cookies from you." She disappears back into the house leaving Kunikida-san and I confused.

"Wha-"

She comes back smiling at Kunikida-san, "So what types of cookies do you two ladies have today?"

"Um actually ma'am, we're not Girl Guides*."

(A/N: *Girl Scouting was first introduced to Japan by Miss Muriel Greenstreet, a British missionary teacher, in 1919. The Movement gradually spread and in 1920 took the name Nihon Joshi Hododan (Girl Guides of Japan))

"Oh." she looks disappointed, "Well that's alright, how may I help you."

"For starters, my colleague and I are both very sorry for causing such a ruckus earlier. We thought someone else was dwelling here. We're looking for that person, a man named Dazai Osamu. We believe he used to live here."

"Oh, Dazai-san. Ah, yes he and his husband were such nice people. They helped me set up the house after I bought it from them. I always wonder what's happened to them."

Neither of us understand her words. Kunikida-san finally breaks the silence. "His . . . husband?"

"Oh yes, a lovely boy. Strangest hair I've ever seen but a great kid. They said they were buying a bigger house somewhere less crowded. Just out of the city I think, I always told them that there was nothing much there, lot's of crime, but they were determined. Something to be said about youth, I suppose." She smiles fondly, as if thinking of her own children.

We're both shocked at this news but we can't exactly question her.

"Thank you, for your help ma'am, if you know the exact name of the place could you please write it down."

"Oh yes, sure thing. Nothing bad has happened to them, right?"

Kunikida-san hesitates, "No."

"Oh good." she says handing him the piece of paper. He nods and we both bow, he sticks the paper in his notebook.

"Good day ma'am." I tell her and she waves sweetly.

—

When we're back in the car I sigh. "Well that was . . . unexpected. I had no idea Dazai-san liked men. You wouldn't know the way he flirts with that waitress downstairs, I wonder if his husband minds. Gosh, I still can't believe Dazai-san is married." I know I'm rambling but Kunikida-san doesn't tell me to shut up. He must be as surprised as I am. "Is his name even Dazai. Is that his birth name or did he change it after marriage. I wonder if they have children."

Kunikida-san shrugs, looking down at the paper with the name of the neighbourhood that the old woman gave us. He slams the brakes and several people honk at us.

"What is it, Kunikida-san?"

"This address. It's in Port Mafia territory."

"Oh well, aren't there a few neighbourhoods on that side of the city? I'm sure it's just a coincidence, I mean he moved there a long time ago so he probably didn't know at the time. Maybe they didn't have that territory yet."

Kunikida-san's voice is a whisper as people swerve angrily around us. "It's right in the heart. Only about a 15 minutes drive from the Mafia's Headquarters."

"Oh. Well the house was probably built before the Mafia headquarters so he must not have known when he bought it, right?" I say not believing myself as I fight to think of a reasonable explanation to this bizarre situation, "What should we do?"

"We are detectives. we must investigate further." He says determinedly.

"Alright." I gulp at the thought of entering the notorious Mafia's territory. What if we run into Akutagawa? The thought makes me shiver and my leg prickles with the memory of the pain when the Rashoumon user sliced it clean off.

—

I keep my gaze out the window, watching the scenery slowly darken, watching houses become warehouses and industrial buildings as we travel further into Mafia territory.

No one's tried to stop us . . . yet.

Thankfully Kunikida-san's car is rather inconspicuous. He parks it behind an abandoned warehouse and gets out. I follow his lead, but there's nothing to see besides storage facilities and factories

"Kunikida-san?" I ask nervously, a disturbing thought occurring to me, "you don't think that Dazai-san lives in a Port Mafia warehouse do you?"

"It does seem like the thing one would do if they had a death wish," I almost squeak in fear but then I remember our surroundings.

Determined Kunikida-san keeps walking. Eventually we leave the area where most of the storage facilities are. There's an overgrown lot, but it looks somehow purposeful, like the wildflowers were planted and then allowed to grow this way.

We walk a bit through the tall flowers and then see it. A wearhouse, only it's fancier. It has nice glass windows with modern looking flower boxes and the corrugated steel siding is painted an even matte black, no grime or rust in sight.

The shades are down but I can tell that lights are on because a warm yellow glow seeps out from them into the night. Above the original warehouse the owners have built an addition that looks like those modern homes you see in fancy magazines. A small white box not big enough to be a house on its own but still bigger than my dorm back at the agency. But the shades are down there too, so I can't see inside.

There's a garage just a little away from the house with tire tracks that suggest it's used often, but there are three individual tire tracks. One set from a car and one from what appears to be half a car. A motorbike? Dazai-san doesn't use one, maybe his mystery husband does?

"Is this really the only house around, Kunikida-san?"

"Yes I believe so." He says as we walk closer.

Then, I see a noose rigged on a post in the front yard, and I know this must be Dazai-san's home.

At this point we're both tired and even Kunikida-san doesn't seem to have the energy to be angry at Dazai-san. Also it's such a nice calming house that it's hard to be angry here, although I'm sure Kunikida-san will find the will to be angry as soon as Dazai-san opens the door.

The door is nice, with a seasonal wreath of pine tree clippings and dried fall leaves and a lamp. The doormat says "Welcome"in big lettering with a tiny "(Just kidding, fuck off)" at the bottom, both in fancy cursive script.

Kunikida-san knocks, there's no answer. He knocks again, still nothing. Then once more, we hear two male voices, one Dazai-san's and another sounding familiar but distorted, then there's footsteps.

Dazai-san opens the door, wearing only a jumper and trousers, looking strange without his usual outfit. "Oh, it's you. I'm almost offended that you didn't notice my absence until now. I guess this proves you really don't need me for the paperwork. However it is a lot quieter here than at the office." He turns to me, the smug grin off his face replaced with a soft smile, clearly to spite Kunikida-san, "Sorry for keeping you waiting at the door, Atsushi-kun. Chibi didn't want to let me go."

"Chibi." I question, I think I've heard the name somewhere . . . but where?

"Ah, yes, my husband. He is rather short, you see, my very own dog."

"Do-" I start to ask about the nickname, but I'm cut off.

"I h-he-he'TSHIii-e'shiewww *sniff* heard that you bastard! *cough, cough, cough*" A congested voice from upstairs echoes. I swear for some reason that it's familiar. But why, it couldn't possibly be?

Dazai-san looks personally offended, "My love, you need to rest. You mustn't over exert yourself." he calls up the staircase. There's more footsteps and someone stomps down the staircase (I swear I can feel the ground beneath me shake just a little), coming into view slowly. His face is covered by the hood of a hoodie and a mask.

"I. Amb. Fucgkig. Fide." now that their closer I can tell that the voice is male, his words muffled as he barely conceals coughs into his elbow. Standing next to each other I can see what Dazai-san meant, his husband at full height comes only just above his shoulder.

"Hmm, Chibi doesn't sound fine." The worry is clear in Dazai-san's voice as he puts a hand on his husband's forehead. It's strange to see him being so caring and gentle like this.

Dazai-san's husband sniffs indignantly. "I'mb fide edough to kick your sorry ass!" His sickly tone and the way he sways on his feet contradict his words.

Again I feel as if I recognized his voice but that isn't possible because I've never met him before. I mean, maybe I've seen him at the supermarket before and just didn't notice but it seems unlikely because I don't think I can afford the fancy supermarkets that people who live in this kind of house can shop at. I shop at the corner store. -^T-T^- (Your donations are very much welcome).

(A/N: Send our favourite -^weretiger^- boi some ¥en in the comments pls, so he can shop at a real supermarket lol. He's trying his best! Also if any of Chuuya's dialogue appears misspelt that's because I'm trying to show he is heavily congested. It probably just looks like I can't type, but I'm trying.)

Dazai-san puts his arm around his husband's waist to steady him. "You still have a temperature love, I really must insist that you go back to bed. I'll be there as soon as I deal with these visitors."

At the word visitors Dazai-san's husband looks up at us. I can see his face a bit more now just a sliver of fair faintly freckles skin and a set of piercing blue eyes. A foreigner? He speaks Japanese very well, he must have been here a long time.

I wonder where he's originally from. Somewhere in Europe maybe? The United Kingdom, France, Germany, it can't be Holand because Dutch people are tall.

"Oh. It's you two. The detegdives." He says it with an amount of disdain in his voice that sounds rather unwarranted given that he's never even met us before. "Kindly, ged out ob by house." Despite the stuffiness of his voice it still scares me. I can see the threat in his eyes. It's almost . . . familiar. I know I have seen this look somewhere, but where? How did he know we're detectives, does Dazai-San talk about us at home? I guess it makes sense.

"Ah, yes." I can tell from Kunikida-san's voice that he feels the fear too, "We'll leave as soon as Dazai here tells us what he's been doing cutting work for the past week."

"A week! Preposterous!" Dazai-san exclaims, "It's only been three days."

"That's almost a full work week you FOOL!" Kunikida-san is close to exploding again. I really hope this doesn't escalate, I'd hate to leave a bad impression on Dazai-san's husband.

"Anyways, this is a lovely house you have. It must be scary though, living so close to Mafia territory." I ask hoping to redirect the conversation away from animosity and get some answers from Dazai-san. I think he can tell what I'm doing.

"Thank you for the compliments Atsushi-kun, I'm glad you like it." His politeness confuses me at first then I realise he must be teasing Kunikida-san. "But no actually, we feel very safe living here." He's gigling as he says it.

"Really?" I can't hide my surprise.

Dazai-san hmms in affirmation, he's about to say more when his husband shivers.

"Is Chibi cold?"

His husband says nothing.

"Yes, it is very cold, you shouldn't be so close to the open door, you'll only make your cold worse."

The husband looks like he wants to protest but retreats into the house anyways.

Dazai-san turns back to Kunikida-san and I.

"It really isn't a good idea to be letting all the warm air out, why don't you two come inside. Atsushi, would you like something warm to drink?" Dazai-san's voice drips with teasing sweetness and I don't miss how he disregarded Kunikida in his offer of refreshments.

"Um, I'm okay."

Dazai-san gives me a look, he knows me too well. "I promise you it's no trouble at all, I'm making Chibi and myself tea as well."

"Thank you."

He shuts the door behind us and we walk through the open floor to the kitchen counter where Dazai-san's husband is sitting.

"This really is a very nice house." I say because I can't think of anything else that wouldn't be considered rude.

Dazai-san's husband groans, "Why'd you led themb comb indside? Tha kid is gibing bme a headache."

Dazai-san pats his head affectionately, "Aw is Chibi pouting?"

His husband growls, or tries to but it comes out as a cough.

Dazai-san continues, "I let them in because it's the polite thing to do. Don't worry, I know dogs have no manners."

Dazai-san's husband huffs in annoyance I can tell isn't completely genuine. The interaction seems familiar, personal and I feel like I'm intruding so I look away.

When I turn I see the stand where the coats are kept.

It's a perfectly normal hatstand with seven "branches". The highest holds a long, tan trench coat, the second highest holds another trench coat, shorter than Dazai-san's and black with brown lapels . . . and hooked on top of the stand is an equally familiar black hat with brown trim.

This outfit I'd know anywhere even with the rest missing. The sight itself strikes fear into my heart, if the outfit is here it's owner must not be very far off. I scan the room making sure the mafia Executive won't suddenly appear and attack.

"Atsushi-kun!"

"What?" I ask, just registering that dazai-san has been calling my name.

"Your tea is ready. Is something the matter?"

"Why do you have Executive Nakahara-san's coat and hat? Did you steal them from him or something, because you should probably give them back, I bet he's mad. And since you live so close to the Port Mafia and all . . ." the sentence dies in my mouth when I notice the expression dazai-san wears.

He stares at me for a moment, cocking his head in a cat-like manner, and then he bursts out laughing.

"Dazai-san! How can you laugh, Executive Nakahara-san might really hurt you!" I try to emphasise the exact level of danger that my mentor has put himself in but he doesn't seem to get it.

Dazai-san's husband is laughing as well at this point but it trunks into vicious coughing and draws all our attention away from the predicament for a moment.

"Be gentle with your throat, love, you have such a pretty voice."

When Dazai-san's husband recovers his breath he turns around to me with a look of incredulity. "Is dis kid jogkig?" Dazai-san's husband somehow still manages to sound sarcastic even through the congestion.

"I don't think so, my love, have your tea."

"I deed wine if I'm godda dead with dis shid."

Dazai-san shakes his head stubbornly, "Nu-uh! No alcohol for sick Chibis."

"Ugh, den ged themb oud, I wand to sleeb."

"Aww, but we haven't even told them yet."

Dazai-san's husband frowns.

"Come on, I'll give you a massage if you stay up just a bit more, hmm?"

"Fide!"

"Umm, told us what, Dazai-san? What about Executive Nakahra's coat and hat?"

He looks at me like he's forgotten we were here but it's obviously an act.

"Oh, yes, that. I didn't steal it, and it's actually Executive Dazai now."

"Wha-" my brain short circuits

Kunikida seems to process this faster than I do.

"You've joined the Port Mafia? Why!? How long have you been a double agent!?" Kunikida tries to lunge for Dazai-san but he's on the ground before I can blink. I see the surprise in dazai's eyes, he hadn't been expecting this.

I try to slow my thoughts down so I can fully observe the situation.

Dazai-san's husband stands with his foot on Kunikida-san's chest, the hood of his sweatshirt fallen down displaying his bright red hair with its unique cut. These features I'd know anywhere. Kunikida-san's eyes bulge practically out of their socket, he sputters under the weight of the man.

I scream in delayed reaction to the Gravity Manipulator's sudden appearance. Everyone turns to face me, they all look down so I do too, My feet and hands have turned into paws from the shock.

Even Executive Nakahara looks startled.

"Well, that was unexpected, but my love, you're still ill, now is hardly the time for fighting."

My love? What is going on here?

Executive Nakahara steps away, leaning heavily on Dazai-san Kunikida-san scrambles to his feet, notebook brandishing out in front of him like a sword.

"What are you doing here?"

"He lives here," Dazai-san says simply, "He's Executive Dazai, not me. Don't you worry Kunikida, my loyalties are still firm. I am loyal to Chuuya, not the Port Mafia."

Kunikida-san looks ready to blow up so I ask the obvious next question.

"Why is Naka- Chuuya-san using your last name, is he trying to make a fake identity?"

No, Chuuya took my last name. Such a thieving chibi!" my mentor laughs, "Actually, I gave it to him."

Kunikida-san's eyes roll back in his head and he falls to the floor with a dull thud.

I start to go over to him but my mentor waves his hand dismissively, "Leave him there."

"You debanded I tage it, you basdard!" the Mafai executive corrects, sounding sicker than ever.

My mentor ignores his words, planting a kiss over on top of his head. "Anyway, there are many ways these things are decided in same gender marriages but since I'm taller than Chibi it was only logical that he take my name."

The Executive all but growls. It all falls into place, I should've known. Dazai-san always calls Chhuya-san Chibi when we have to work with the Port Mafia on missions. I feel stupid, it should have been obvious as soon as I saw the blue eyes and red hair.

"And to answer your original question, that is why his coat is here. We don't feel unsafe here because everyone is afraid of us, also the added convenience of being close to Chibi's job."

"Why are they afraid of you Dazai-san?" as the question comes out I wonder if I should clarify who I'm directing the question to.

"Oh, I used to be in the Port Mafia."

"WHATTT!!!???" these words have snapped Kunikida-san out of his unconscious spell

"Ah, the idealist finally awakens. I hope your little fainting spell hasn't messed up your schedule too badly." Dazai-san mocks

Kunikida-san struggles to get himself upright, his face as red as when "Well, Mafia or no, where have you been for the past week."

"Three days" Dazai-san corrects again.

Kunikida-san clenches his notebook tighter as if he's imagining strangling his collage, I think he might be.

"Isn't it obvious?" dazai-san asks the room

Neither Kunikida-san nor I answer.

"My beloved Chibi here has come down with a most nasty cold. I could hardly leave him home alone to suffer in this state, now could I?" He massages Chuuya's shoulders as he asks the rhetorical question. I can see the executive starting to sink into sleep.

He looks so harmless and I really do feel badly for him.

"I see, we're– I'm sorry for intruding. I, uh, hope you feel better Chuuya-san."

"Thank you, Atsushi-kun–" dazai-san is cut off by footsteps on the stairs, small and light, not at all like Chuuya's aggressive stomp.

"Father? Papa?" A small boy stands on the landing leaning sleepily against the railing. His hair is dark brown and his eyes are large hazel orbs of innocence. He can't be older than five. He holds a toy slingshot and it's aimed right at me.

"My, my, what is Saku-chan doing up so late?" Dazai-san coos sweetly at the boy who comes down the stairs, slingshot still aimed, ready to fire. His father laughs, "Put that down, this is Atsushi-kun, he just stopped by for a visit."

"Oh. Sowy 'sushi" His sleep-induced slur and baby talk make the words utterly adorable.

"It's fine." I tell the young boy.

"Is Kyu-chan awake as well?"

"No."

"Oh that's good, I'd hate for all this yelling to hurt their ears."

He turns back to me, laughing as he catches the sleeping executive as he slips to the floor. "Thank you for visiting Atsushi, but I'm afraid we're all a bit tired this late at night."

Dazai-san's sudden manners take me by surprise. "Oh, of course, Kunikida and I shouldn't overstay our welcome. You four?" Dazai-san nods in confirmation, "have a very good night."

"And you as well."

I nod, taking the hand of a dazed Kunikida-san and leading him out of the door. Tonight was certainly interesting.

(A/N: Sorry about this ending I was having loads of trouble with it. It isn't as intense as I would've liked on the relationship reveal part. I guess my brain was just in fluff mode, but I'm not upset about the way this turned out, I guess. I may edit later. If you like it pls let me know. Also for clarification Soukoku has two kids, Sakunosuke (named after Oda) and Q is also their kid in this fic.)

#soukoku relationship reveal #dazai chuuya - nee nakahara #Executive Dazai #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #soukoku #dazai osamu #port mafia #atsushi nakajima #kunikida doppo

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waterfallofspace · 1 year ago

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🦊 w fukuzawa? If you don't mind the double req I'm so sorry 😭

No worries in the slightest hun! I don't mind at all~~

🦊 Animal allergies for F/ukuzawa, dropped under cut! (a little longer then the others but still a drabble technically~)

“You’ve gotta be kidding me!”

Kunikida’s voice sounds out from the kitchen, quickly followed by the faint sounds of Atsushi mumbling. Dazai meets Ranpo’s gaze with a smirk that’s quickly returned.

“Boys,” Yosano says, lounging on the couch. “Care to explain what that’s all about?”

Neither responds, though in their defence, there wasn’t exactly a chance to. Before anyone can get another word in, Kunikida bursts from the kitchen, dragging Atsushi by one hand, and a cat by the other. Yosano barely contains her giggles as she realizes he’s holding them both by the scruff of their necks.

“Did any of you know about this?” Kunikida demands, glaring around the room.

Dazai speaks up first, mischief lighting up his face. “Yes, of course I did. We brought Atsushi on, what, a few weeks ago? Did you really not notice, Kunikida-kun?”

The sheer violence that flashes through Kunikida’s eyes suggests that, had he not been carrying two strays, someone might have died today. Instead he settles for a deeply irritated sigh, collecting himself before he speaks again.

“I meant the kitten. Ranpo-san? You of all people must understand why we can’t allow this.”

Ranpo leans back in his chair, eyes still carefully concealed. With a balanced tone, he gestures to Atsushi. “We kept that one. Why not this one too?”

Kunikida’s mouth drops open, his glasses starting to fall down his nose. “Surely you remember what today is, right? And why we absolutely, unconditionally, must not let-”

“Kunikida,” A deep voice sounds out from the door, all eyes turning to greet it. “What are you holding?”

Dazai nearly suffocates as he attempts to smother his laughter at the look that crosses Kunikida’s face. Any colour that he might have had is replaced by a sheen of sweat over his now pale skin.

“P- president I… I didn’t… it’s not what it looks like!”

Fukuzawa simply blinks, casting his dark gaze from Atsushi, to the kitten, and back again. “So you didn’t find Atsushi bringing a kitten into the agency?” The firmness to his voice leaves the words sounding harsh, but from the back Ranpo giggles, easily seeing the humour in his tone.

As Kunikida attempts to find a sentence that fits the situation, Atsushi speaks up from his position hanging just off the floor. “I’m sorry sir, it was just sitting out in the alley, and… and it looked so sad… I couldn’t just leave it there! I promise it won’t stay here long, m- maybe I’ll find it a home, or bring it to a shelter, or-”

“Nonsense,” Fukuzawa interrupts, letting his gaze soften a little at the wince Atsushi lets slide across his form. “The kitten will remain here, in your care.”

“B- but president, sir, aren’t… aren’t you-” Kunikida begins, cutting himself off as Fukuzawa shooks him a look. Normally that look would be enough to silence him, however the iridescent sheen under his eyes offsets the harsh quality.

A moment of silence passes, no one daring to interrupt the non-verbal conversation taking place between the two. Finally the argument seems to come to a quick end as Fukuzawa spins on his heel, ducking into his arm.

“yRRSHh’oo-! yyiHHShhuh-! hh’RSHhuh-!”

Kunikida immediately takes a few steps back, Atsushi dragging along with him, too surprised to resist. Yosano and Dazai offer simultaneous blessings, a western custom that the agency had begun using when Dazai had arrived, and Ranpo remained silent.

Raising his head, there’s a slight tint to Fukuzawa’s cheeks. “Excuse me, I apol… hold on- rRSHh-! ERSHH-! ERSHHH’uuh-!” This time he only makes it into his hand, taking the tissue Dazai passes with a grateful nod, and turning away to clean up.

“I’m so sorry sir, I… I had no idea!” Atsushi begins, trailing off into a series of rambles, some entirely unrelated to the current issue. He only manages to pull himself together when Kunikida switches out the collar grip for a firm smack.

“It’s quite alright,” Fukuzawa responds, though his words are undercut by the tissue pressed to his face. “You had no way of knowing. Besides, just because I’m al… allergic- heH’RSHH-! ERSHH’uu-! Excuse me. Allergic to them, doesn’t mean I don’t still enjoy their company.”

At this, Ranpo finally chimes in, laughter evident in his voice. “You should have seen him last year. There was a stray outside the building and he brought it home. He was a mess for a full week after that, called out ‘sick’ from the office.”

All eyes turn back to Fukuzawa, Yosano giving him a playful glare. “You should have told us, I would have brought you antihistamines.”

Fukuzawa gives a quick nod, eyes watering once more as he ducks back into his arm. “HRSHh’uh-! rRSH-! eh’RSHhoo-! I was… was- ARSHH’uh-! I was handling it myself. I keep a supply at home in case of…” He trails off, gesturing vaguely to the current situation.

Kunikida takes this opportunity to hand the kitten back to Atsushi, before turning to Yosano. “Can you go get some now for the president? Seeing as he didn’t know this was coming, I’m assuming he hasn’t taken anything.”

A glance at Fukuzawa confirms the suspicion, and Yosano hurries off to fetch some meds. Atsushi retreats further back, still offering rambling apologies under his breath.

Fukuzawa silences him with a nod, tissue still tightly clutched to his nose. “I’ll be id mby office. Please sedd the docdor idn soodn.”

“Of course, president-” Kunikida begins, pausing for-

“HRSHHuh-! ERSHH’oo-!”

Before finishing with a softer, “And bless you.”

#waterfallasks #waterfalldrabbles #i always have fun writing group agency scenes #i just think they're so fun i adore them #hopefully you enjoy this~!#thank you for both requests~~

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flaresanimedump · 2 years ago

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Thinking about open secret RanFuku. It's not public knowledge that they're dating and Fukuzawa is shy to PDA so for the most part they slip under the radar without actively trying. So each of the agency members has to find out on their own.

While Yosano seems like the type to figure it out fast, they met her so young I think she would be blindsided a few years on when she's treating a minor wound on Fukuzawa and gets an eyeful of the hickeys Ranpo sucked into his chest the night before (and maybe she's seen him marked up like that all the time, but she has to see it when she knows Fukuzawa's only been around Ranpo to realize it's him leaving the marks).

Kunikida is probably the most fun to think about. He would either assume they were platonic besties until someone takes pity on him and tells him that Ranpo kissed Fukuzawa with tongue because they're together Kunikida, yes we're sure it wasn't just Ranpo being affectionate, OR he'd see their hands brush once and be like "....I see," in his first week on the job.

They'd probably assume Kenji didn't realize until he says something about it, then Kenji would probably be like "yeah of course they're together?? It's obvious? Why are you guys surprised they've been together 12 years and live together and don't even need to talk to know what the other is thinking. This is standard married couple behavior. We have lots of those back home, why would I not know they're together."

Naomi pegs them on sight and brings it up in the interview and Tanizaki is just like 'Naomi please stop embarrassing me in front of my potential future boss (but also don't).'

Dazai also knew on sight, of course.

Atsushi would probably walk in on them making out in Fukuzawa's office and freak out apologizing, shut the door again, and then freak out because OH IT'S LIKE THAT (though I also like the idea of him being a dummy raised in a church and this prompting a "wait two men can... do that!? Oh my god how, I wanna--" revelation.)

Kyoka I feel would figure it out in some moment of stress, maybe even cannibalism. She sees Ranpo devastated and then willing to take on what even she thinks are formidable demons, despite his usual adherence to the rules and despite his commitment to follow Fukuzawa, and at some point in all of it he says something just right and she's like oh. This isn't how I would try to help my parents, this is how my parents would try to help each other.

#fukuran #ranfuku

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starglow-xx · 4 years ago

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(About the brother!atsushi) aRE YOU READING MY MIND MISS?! Because that has been on my mind for MONTHS. TYSM For writing it was amazing!! If you don't mind, may I request (if requests are open) atsushi, still an older brother, but with a sister that's 10-13 yrs old? It's totally fine if you don't wanna do it. Keep up the good stories, ily mwuah!

*sobs* you’re so kind thank youu 🤧🤧

i wrote this a bit differently i hope that’s okay anon! at first i planned for this to be mainly abt atsushi and the reader, but i decided to add in relationship hcs with the agency bc i ran out of ideas

if you guys liked this don’t worry! im planning a special part two for this one so be the look out for it hehe

atsushi with a tween! sister

ft. the armed detective agency

like in my baby sister hcs, you’re still the most important thing to him period

the two of you got picked up by dazai and kunikida when he was 18 (obviously) and when you were 12

for a 12 year old, you were a bit small bc of malnourishment (which makes atsushi feel so bad) so both dazai and kunikida thought you were a bit younger than you actually were

they assumed you were about 9-10ish

you and atsushi both share a favorite food !! chazuke :)

so when kunikida treated the two of you, he made sure you got more bowls bc like i mentioned above, he feels really bad that you were malnourished and under weight

(don’t bring this up but kunikida felt bad too hehe)

when dazai went with your brother to the warehouse, you were with kunikida

imagine the surprise of the other ada members when kunikida came in with a little girl dressed in rags that popped out from behind him

kenji was the one who vocalized his thoughts

“kunikida-san you have a daughter?! wow! i didn’t know that! :D”

when you found out your brother was a tiger, you were a bit concerned but you were actually kind of excited

you were even more excited when you found out the two of you were going to be taken in by the agency

anything was better than the stupid orphanage

and besides!

you got a tiger for an older brother and a bunch of other super powered agents to take care of you! who could want anything else?

at your age, you’re very impressionable and can be influenced easily so atsushi makes sure to teach you more in depth of good morals and the importance of kindness

his heart swells with pride and relief when he catches you being kind to others

pride bc he’s proud that even after all the two of you have gone through, you still ended up being a good kid and having a bright view of the world

and relief bc he hasn’t failed as a big brother

pfftt like he could ever fail

but please, from time to time reassure him that he’s perfect and the only big brother that you’d ever want bc he rlly needs that kind of validation

with his salary and savings, he tries to buy nice things for you

what a sweetheart 🥺

he saw you eyeing that one dress at a store window? fast forward abt a week and half and it’s inside a pretty gift bag for you

you wanted to try that dessert from the nice bakery? that’s dessert after dinner at one point

but other than buying you things, he sets money aside for you

like all the time

(y/n), here have this, you might need it”

“but nii-san you just gave me—”

“take it”

#1 spoiler

also your #1 confidant and source of physical affection

you tell him anything and everything (except crushies and those kinds of things)

atsushi loves it when you talk abt your day and he can see the big smile on your face and the sparkle in your eyes

it gives him the strength to keep going 😖😖

the two of you aren’t as touch starved as you’d probably think, but that’s only bc the two of you had each other

in your opinion, no one can match the hugs of your big brother

and it got even better bc YAYY he has tiger arms now ٩(◕‿◕)۶

if you ask, he’d carry you around too hehe

you also get nightmares quite often so he’ll always be there ready to calm you down, talk if you need to, and rock you back to sleep

god i love him 🤧🤧

atsushi will do everything in his power to protect you and make sure you get to grow up happy, supported, and loved

port mafia attack? oop he’s already taking you to the nearest escape route

someone is starting to harass you? they just got suckered punched into the next week

you want to go out to have some fun? he’ll go ask the president for a day off

you’re not feeling well? he’ll take another day off and take care of you

whatever you want to do, he’ll do it with you! (as long as it’s within reason)

will always be your #1 supporter! and he’s the president of your fan club hehe

he loves you so so much and will do anything for you; your life and happiness will always be more important to him

you are his reason to keep going

agency head canons !!

atsushi is your big brother, but kunikida is most definitely some sort of father figure

everyone can see it

except kunikida of course

kunikida scolds you lightly if he thinks your manners need work or if you make a mess in the agency

you listen to him of course and in turn as some sort of a reward, he’ll give you pieces of stationary

he always gives you the nice, good quality kind and you’re over the moon

atsushi adores it when you come running to him showing your new notebook or fountain pen and blabbering what you’re going to do with it

sometimes it isn’t even as a reward for being a good child; he’ll just give it to you and he’ll say smth like “i noticed you’ve used up your last notebook quite quickly, so here’s another one” or “did you run out of ink? here have this then”

he usually has a soft spot for children in general, but he most definitely has a soft spot (or a thousand) for you

yosano is kind of like a motherly figure to you

she gives you the guidance a mother should and goes on shopping trips with you!

atsushi always gets dragged along by you, but he thinks it’s worth it seeing you look so happy

yosano being a doctor also tries to teach the things you should know, or things that would be helpful to you

she’ll teach you the basics of cooking, sewing, how to treat a cold/fever, etc

also gives you excellent advice 1000% of the time

“remember (y/n)-chan if someone hurts you come tell me and then i’ll chop them into—”

“yOSANO-SENSEI DONT TELL HER THAT—”

fukuzawa is like a father to most in the agency but you see him more as a grandfather figure

bi weekly tea and gossip sessions hehe

along with cat talk!

most of the time though, it’s just you talking and him listening to you, but the two of you enjoy it nonetheless

“and then kunikida-san ended up crashing into a pole and dazai-san started to laugh at him and i did too because it was really funny but we ended up getting scolded—”

“hmm i see...”

he’ll let you stay in his office as he fills out paperwork; you’re usually doodling or drawing in your notebooks

sometimes he’ll meditate and you’ll join him, but 4/7 times you’d fall asleep

you always wake up with a blanket over you

dazai is like a cool but a highly concerning and kind of high maintenance uncle

frequently takes you out with him when he ditches work

walks in the park, eating at uzumaki so he has the excuse of treating you so he doesn’t have to pay his tab avoiding kunikida and sometimes chuuya and akutagawa, all that fun stuff

also tries to not talk abt suicide in front of you especially if it’s just the two of you alone

he knows that you mean the world to his pupil and that said pupil would probably hate him for putting suicide inside your brain

he teaches you random but useful things like how to pick a lock, how to steal kunikida’s notebook if you’re looking for some information, how to sweet talk your way out of things, etc.

is also the one to tell you that if you ever get a significant other to introduce them to the agency first

he always wants all of your gossip; some of them work pretty well for blackmail

“dazai-san! dazai-san! did you know that kunikida-san lost his glasses and he was looking for them for nearly an hour when he was just holding them the entire time??”

“woah really (y/n)-chan?! hey hey can you say it again into this recording device so kunikida-kun would believe me when i tell him—”

always ends up giving kunikida a heart attack when he says that you’ve been with him all day

ranpo is also like a cool but a highly concerning and kind of high maintenance uncle

will share some of his snacks, but don’t push it or you might not get anything at all

loves it when you compliment him

if you tagged along with him and your brother on a case, he will show off to impress you

“...and that’s how the crime happened”

“UWAHH RANPO-SAN YOU’RE SO COOL”

atsushi is lowkey and kunikida is highkey stressed that ranpo’s eating habits will rub off on you

“ne (y/n)-chan do you wanna try this highly caffeinated drink and this concerning amount of sugar filled snack?”

“can i really?!”

“rANPO-SAN NO—”

ranpo definitely does stuff like that on purpose

the tanizakis are like siblings to you!

a weird set of siblings but siblings nonetheless

the two of them adore you and think you’re precious

atsushi definitely knows how to do your hair whether it’s long or short but he got even better at it when he asked the two

hehe braid trains are definitely a thing + kyouka and kenji (and maybe even dazai)

sometimes you have sibling swap days

you’re with junichiro for most of the day and atsushi is with naomi

strange i know

each of the tanizaki siblings try to make it fun bc they know that the two of you did not at all have a happy upbringing

junichiro likes spending time with you by taking you out to different places that naomi likes to frequent

like the mall, different stores and restaurants, the park, places like those

naomi does the same thing with atsushi so if you ever bump into them, you go out and eat together :)

besides atsushi, the next one in line who spoils you the most would be junichiro (and yosano & kunikida both coming in at a close third)

he honestly can’t help it; you remind him of how naomi was when she was younger

and besides

he’s always been a sucker when it came to the happiness of a little sister

“would you really buy this for me junichiro-san?!”

“of course! don’t worry about it” :)

wanna talk abt boys/girls/celebrity crushes things like that? naomi is your girl

you feel a bit embarrassed to go talking to yosano or your brother abt that and kyouka does not know a thing abt them either

“uwahh naomi-san look at all these people in this magazine! they look so good!”

“right?! but of course onii-sama is still the best—”

you get along with kenji and kyouka quite nicely being roughly the same age as them; they’re also like siblings!

just pure, wholesome vibes from the three of you

you’re over the moon when she finds out that kyouka is staying with you and your brother

atsushi is twice as happy seeing you talk your mouth off and finally having a girl around your age to talk to

“do you think demon snow can change how she looks?”

“hmm... im not sure...”

you and kenji talk abt anything and everything

he even teaches you how to take care of plants!

sometimes the two of you are kind of in the same boat bc you don’t know much abt yokohoma being stuck in the orphanage and kenji doesn’t know much abt cities in general

“wait where are we again kenji-san?”

“ah we’re close to the ports! but im not really sure how close because i don’t know what the symbols on this sign mean”

“don’t worry! neither do i!”

bonus things!

yosano was kind of too late teaching you abt you know what

“NII-SAN IM BLEEDING IN BETWEEN MY LEGS”

you’re sobbing in the agency’s bathroom and atsushi is panicking trying to get you to open the door

“Y/N?! H-HOLD ON LET ME GET YOSANO SENSEI”

ranpo overhears and cackles making everyone around him confused

suddenly atsushi bursts in the agency basically on the verge of tears rambling incoherent sentences abt the bathroom, you, and blood

it just clicked for everybody in the room

(im going to pretend that kenji has sisters back home so that atsushi is the only one who remain oblivious here hehe)

atsushi is genuinely confused and sort of concerned that no one is freaking out with him

yosano waves her hand saying smth like that she’d take care of it and junichiro pulls atsushi to the side to talk to him

fast forward like half and hour and dazai and ranpo are cackling on the looks of both of your faces

honestly not sure who’s more traumatized, you or your brother

“why does this have to happen” :(

“ne ne (y/n)-chan!~ you’re too young but at some point you’re not going to have it!”

“uwahh really dazai-san?” :D

“yeah! but first you have to have ANFK—”

next thing you know your ears are being covered by your brother and dazai is thrown across the room by kunikida

you know

the normal

you’re twelve and have never gone to school, but the agency takes care of that

it’s too dangerous to go to school so they teach you what’s necessary and whatever else they can

kunikida takes care of math (obviously)

yosano takes care of science/biology/anatomy/health (whatever you wanna call it)

ranpo even dragged poe to help you with english

atsushi even got lucy to help you out with english too!

as tanizaki and naomi used to be students, they give you their old work books and they try to teach you all the other subjects

sometimes kyouka and kenji are there learing with you too!

sorry if there’s some errors! i’ll read through it again later :)

and as always, reblogs and shares are appreciated! i hope you all stay safe! and just in case nobody told you they loved you today, i love you! you are enough! <3

writing belongs to me! please do not plagiarize! the reblog button is there for a reason

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hanemiso · 3 years ago

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Operation: Dairy For Dazai

>>>a dazai osamu x reader<<<

request: "omg i love your post about Dazai and his possibility of having lactose intolerance hahaha, i wish you could do a fanfic out from that"

a/n: um this is such a great idea??? this was so much fun to write omg i hope y'all like it! also i know dazai doesn't necessarily drink coffee with milk and sugar/creamer, but for the sake of the story he does! also sorry if the gif looks weird, i couldn't find his weird little run anywhere else.

synopsis: no one has seen dazai drink milk or consume dairy of any kind...it's up to the agency to figure out if dazai is lactose intoleralnt or not!

warnings: one swear word, dazai not being able to handle dairy

"hey atsushi, you ever notice that dazai doesn't consume dairy?"

"what do you mean, y/n?" atsushi asks, glancing up at you from the computer.

"think about it. have you ever seen dazai drink milk? eat cheese? buy ice cream?" you press on, raising your brows.

atsushi takes a second to think before responding with, "now that you mention it, no i haven't...why are you asking anyway?"

"i think dazai is lactose intolerant."

you now have atsushi's full attention as he rolls closer to your desk and furrows his brows. he looks around the room for the brunette you're talking about before turning back to you, "you think so? i don't know...maybe it's like a dietary thing."

you deadpan, "you really think the man who goes out of his way to try new attempts at committing suicide--the one who came into the office with a hallucinogenic mushroom from a random mountain--is concerned with his own nutrition?"

atsushi goes silent and nods his head in agreement.

"come on, atsushi. i mean, why would that be the one thing out of his entire diet that he'd choose to cut out?"

"that's true, i've seen the kinds of things he eats...but why is this something you're interested in?"

"because, atsushi, the thought of THE dazai osamu even having one slight weakness--and the fact that it very well may be dairy, of all things-- is amusing. you don't find it interesting? that he can survive things like bullet wounds and getting kidnapped without any problem, but a glass of milk could completely ruin him?"

atsushi was beginning to take interest in what you were talking about. you had a point, he couldn't deny that. they don't know much about dazai and his life as it is. just as it began clicking in his brain, kunikida walks over to your desk to tell you both to get back to work. at the sound of his footsteps, you turn towards him and before he can say anything at all, you ask him the same question as atsushi. kunikida has a smiliar reaction and response to atsushi, which just adds to the curiosity of dazai's possible dairy problem.

"i don't pay attention to that idiot's diet anyway, nor do i care." he says matter-of-factly.

anyone could tell that kunikida was slightly interested, just by the way he was continuing to linger by your desk as you continued talking about it with atsushi. soon enough, tanizaki had joined the conversation; then ranpo and kenji, and soon everyone in the agency other than fukuzawa. everyone was huddled around your desk, sharing memories of dazai's lack of dairy consumption. it was then decided that this theory of dazai being lactose intolerant would be put to the test when dazai returned to the office.

ranpo had come up with the idea, it wasn't too elaborate but a simple plan that could trick even the likes of dazai into drinking a glass of milk. during the discussion of dazai's dietary habits, it was also brought to everyone's attention by kunikida that it seems dazai doesn't have a high spice tolerance either. with that in mind, the plan was for the agency to have a joint dinner tonight, with curry on the menu tonight; spicy curry to be exact. dazai always flirts with you in the office, so it was your job to distract him by indulging in his pick-up lines and such. once he takes a bite and realizes it's too spicy for him, he'd try to find water to alleviate the pain, but coincidentally there is no water in sight. because of this, he'd be forced to drink the glass of milk you hand him. of course, if this didn't work, for dessert you'd give him a cup of coffee with milk and sugar (he uses non-dairy creamer in his coffee anyway).

you and kyouka set up a table to put the bowls of curry on, while atsushi and kunikida began bringing in the curry. tanizaki, naomi, and ranpo were in charge of getting the desserts to really sell the image of a nice gathering. kenji and yosano were in charge of tinkering with the water pipes to close off any possibility of access to water. this task was treated with such care, as any mission brought into the agency would be. each and every one of you were interested in learning about this side of dazai; are you going the extra mile for such a minuscule detail of someone's life? yes, but will it be amusing to find out the truth? also yes.

soon enough, dazai is spotted out the window. the truth is about to be revealed, and you are all nervous but excited.

"remember guys, act natural! operation: dairy for dazai starts now!" you exclaim quietly.

you can hear everyone take a deep breath and begin "talking" amongst themselves as dazai walks in. he stops in his tracks as he eyes the table holding all the bowls of curry and widens his eyes in surprise.

"oh? what's this?" he asks, gesturing to the table.

"y/n suggested having dinner in the agency tonight, so we got some curry and desserts." atsushi explains.

"have a bowl, dazai-kun." you smile at him as you hand him the bowl of spicy curry.

"ah, you're too nice, my belladonna!" he exclaims and grabs the bowl.

so far so good, you think.

you can feel the tension in the room as everyone waits for dazai to take a bite. the conversations carry on amongst people, but no one was truly paying attention to what was being said. the gazes of each member of the agency shifted to dazai as he raised the spoon up to his mouth. you could hear the sound of everyone in the room holding their breaths, even kunikida was sweating.

once the spoon had been placed in his mouth, everyone froze in place. you and atsushi tried to pretend to not be paying much attention to dazai, but it was so hard not to when all of a sudden he stopped chewing. you both slowly turn your head towards him and see his eyes go wide once again. he hurries to the nearest trashcan and spits out the spoonful, quickly turning and looking for a cup of water on the table.

"w-what's wrong, dazai-san?" atsushi asks, also sweating.

"h-hot! spicy curry! atsushi-kun, i need water! please!" dazai exclaims.

you run to the table and pretend to look for a cup of water before grabbing the glass of milk and hurrying towards dazai.

"sorry dazai-kun, i couldn't find any water, but i heard milk helps with the pain!" you hold out the glass of milk.

it feels like time stops as dazai sits there, breathing shallows breaths in attempts to stop the fire in his mouth, and contemplating whether he wants to try his luck with continuing to gasp for air or drinking the milk. he hates suffering, after all. in his mind, all that matters at this moment is extinguishing the flames dancing on his tongue. he grabs the glass, just as planned, and drinks a couple big gulps. everyone is now turned to him, asking if he's okay.

"i'm...fine." he says between pants.

now it was only a matter of time. the dinner continued as normal, but dazai wasn't as social as usual. he sat down with you and atsushi as you continued to talk about different missions.

"oh yeah, dazai-kun, do you remember--" you turn to look at him but realize he's staring at the ground intently as sweat beads on his face, "dazai?"

he blinks once and tries regaining his composure as he looks up at you with his usual smile, "yes, belladonna?"

"are you feeling alright?" you ask with concern laced in your voice.

"of course i am!" dazai tries to reply cheerily, but his bright tone is cut off by a rumbling in his stomach that makes his face twist.

he tries replacing his expression with a smile again, but it looks more pained as another low rumble emits from his body. at this point, everyone in the office is stealing glances. he looks back at the ground as his eyes widen yet again, and only two words are uttered before he takes off running to the bathroom:

"oh shit."

everyone stares at the door, processing what just happened. it was so silent, the only sound you could hear was dazai's rapid footsteps echoing down the hall.

"i knew it." you smirk a bit to yourself.

but your feeling of victory is brief as the horrid smell invades your nostrils. your poor co-workers get assaulted by the same stench, and you all are forced to evacuate.

operation: dairy for dazai was a success, but at what cost?

------------------------------------------

BONUS: how chuuya found out about dazai's lactose intolerance

chuuya was the only person who knew of dazai's problem with dairy, but the way he found out was purely accidental and scarred him.

the event took place when they were 17, and they were both stopping for a drink at a local cafe after a mission. the mission wasn't too bad, but it was early in the morning and chuuya wanted coffee. dazai told him it would stunt his already lacking growth, so chuuya wasn't in the greatest mood; he never was around dazai.

"i wanna sit down so you can order for me!" dazai claps his hands together.

"hey! i don't wan-" chuuya begins to protest but dazai cuts him off while walking away.

"you know what i like!"

chuuya grumbles in annoyance as he heads to the counter and orders two drinks. in his fit of anger, he accidentally ordered two coffees with milk and sugar, but failed to notice as he brought the cups to the table dazai sat at. he narrows his eyes as he sets the cup down in front of dazai and sits across from him. chuuya stares out the window to try and tune out dazai when he hears dazai ask him something quietly.

"is there...milk in this?"

chuuya scoffs and replies, "what's wrong, can't handle a bit of milk?"

he was obviously joking, but the sound that emits from dazai's body in response makes him realize it was no joke. dazai quickly stands and runs to the bathroom while chuuya sits there in disbelief, but with the hope that the rest of the day won't be ruined because of it.

that was wishful thinking though, as they frequently had to stop at public restrooms on their way home and chuuya had to deal with the rancid odor that followed dazai as closely as his own shadow.

taglist: @justmycupoftea93 @loveliestmolly @darlingimawitch @b-i-t-t-i-e-s @browneyespinkhair @silverstar22x @stupidfrogfreak @anotakugardener @jhopesstickeredcarrier @joyfulartisanstudentlamp @spacedoutcoffeebeans @puddingowo66 @kaeyapng @beomluvrr @imobsessedwithskkanditshows

#anime #bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs x reader #bsd #dazai osamu x reader #bsd dazai #dazai's dairy problem #dazai x reader #bsd atsushi #bsd chuuya #bsd kunikida #bsd ranpo #bsd tanizaki #bsd kenji #bsd yosano #bsd naomi #bsd kyouka #bsd x reader

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sunarintoes · 3 years ago

Note

heyyyyy! can i have carnation with dazai, pls? thanksss 💞

Carnation; women and love

Dazai Osamu x gn!reader (dazai refers to reader as Juliet (once) and belladonna)

wc: ~1k

You frown as you watch Dazai prance around the Armed Detective Agency with a dopey smile adorning his pretty face. He links his slender arm with Haruno as he cheerily explains his new double suicide plan, your frown deepens as he continues to chatter with her - she’s obsviosuly not interested, why would she be? But it's not like Dazai cares, afterall, his love for women is all surface level - appearance based and nothing else. And you know that. So why are you so jealous that his attention is not on you?

You let out an annoyed huff and remove your eyes from the dastardly scene only to set your eyes on an equally as dastardly scene - Ranpo doing the ‘fluffy bunny challenge.’ God you hate it here sometimes. Well not really, but you certainly find yourself questioning the antiques of the ADA’s eccentric members more often than not.

“Yn!” You hear Ranpo say, “Come hew anf join meh!”

“No thanks Ranpo-san, I'd rather not.”

Kunikida looks at you with a shocked expression: “Y-you can understand him?”

“Mm yeah I guess?”

“How?” he whispers.

You smile and mouth ‘I'm not sure.’ His face twists even more and you giggle at it, “Don't look so perplexed kunikida-san!” He grumbles a response before heading back to his desk.

“Ynnnie~”

You grimace.

“The Great Detective needs you~”

“... How can I help you with Ranpo-san?”

“Navigating the complexities of catching public transport!” He declares.

“... Why me?”

“Well it's not like you have anything else to do.”

“Mayb-”

“Wrong!” Calls Dazai who suddenly appears right next to you - draping his long body over your’s. “Yn and I are going on a date!”

“We are-”

“Yes! A double suicide!” he exclaims with a sigh. “Oh how beautiful~ you and me, me and you. Holding each other as if we were clinging to dear life itself. My arms enveloped around you, yours around me. My forehead to yours! And as we take our dying breath we proclaim our love to each other! Oh Ynnie! Will you do a double suicide with me?”

You feel your cheeks heat up, “I-”

“Tempting, I know. You won't miss any of these dirty bastards! I promise you! Life after death is beautiful… like you,” he winks.

“Dazai-san, I have work to do.”

He looks to you with an expression that reeks of overdramatic sadness, totally fake, and then he slumps to the floor with a hand over his heart. “Oh woe is me. My dear Juliet! Why must thou make my heart ache.”

“We live in the twenty-first century dude.”

“No! I-”

“Are ya coming or not Ynie,” Ranpo says with a grumble, “I can't do it alone!”

“I'll come with you, don't worry Yn-chan!” Says Atsushi.

“Mm are you sure?”

“Yeah but,” he moves in closer to you, “Please do something about Dazai-san, we have a mission to do later.”

“Yeah will do,” you smile at him as he guides Ranpo out of the ADA. Then you turn to Dazai, he is still wallowing on the floor, failing to garner sympathy and attention. “So Dazai-san. What can I help you with? You seem restless.”

“I am restless without your love belladonna!”

You roll your eyes. “Okay Romeo. Now get up!”

“Anything for you mi amor.” You scowl at him and curse yourself for feeling heat creep up onto you. Your only hope is for him to not notice but Dazai being Dazai notices it anyway. “Oh~ my belladonna how beautiful you are when you're shy for me!” He moves closer to you - his mouth hovering inches over your ear, “Do I make you flustered, dear?”

You feel a shiver run down your spine as you choke out an answer. “C-come on. Let's just go get some coffee or something.” You get up and quickly walk out of the agency, Dazai hot on your heels.

Once you are far out of sight from the agency Dazai slumps against the wall, “How tragic! My own girlfriend doesn't even reciprocate my love!”

“Huh? Osamu, it was literally your idea to keep our relationship a secret!”

He continues to whine, “but belladonna~ I just want the world to know that you're mine! Why cant you be more affectionate with me outside of the bedroom- ow! Why'd you hit me?” he pouts.

“Don't make it sound dirty! Besides, it's your fault. You wanted to keep it a secret so I'm keeping it a secret.”

“Ah my dearest don't pout.”

“Then tell me what you want because youre making me confused.”

He cocks his head to the side which pulls at your heartstrings, “i want you of course-”

“No! Osamu, you don't! Cause if you wanted me you wouldn't hide our relationship or flirt with every other girl you see!”

“Yn…” he pulls you into his chest, “Im sorry,” he mumbles. He wraps his arms around you and runs his hands through your hair. “I guess I was just scared of…”

“Of what?” you say, your arms still limp besides you.

“Of losing you? Of being vulnerable? Of showing that I do care for you? I- I don't know… but I guess I wanted to keep you to myself and I’m scared of the port mafia finding you because they're so powerful and they wouldn't miss the opportunity to take you and do horrible thi-”

“It's okay, I understand.”

His arms tighten their hold around you, “Really?” he mumbles, “You do?”

A small smile tugs at your lips, “Of course I do but that doesn't mean I'm not hurt by your actions.”

“Let me make it up to you with a date-”

“Just a date?” you raise your eyebrow.

“And I'll clear up the misunderstandings with the assistants.”

You nod your head, “I like that.”

“I like you.”

“Well I love you.”

He giggles as he brings himself level to your face. You smile as he presses his soft lips on your cheek, “I love you too.”

“So were you really jealous huh?”

“N-no no i was not, why would i be-”

“Awww you were jealous that my attention wasnt on you!”

“Huh? Why would I be jealous of a damned womanizer!”

“Owwies that hurts,” he pouts.

#dazai #dazai osamu #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #dazai fluff #dazai drabble #request #flower prompts <3

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