#like maybe I'm dumb (TM)

[steelthroat]

I think after this I'll need to actually try to adult-up and if i get diagnosed with something I'll then have to. Idk. Do something about it.

[mellonhead58]

Captain Laserhawk be like

episodes 1-3:

episodes 4-5:

episode 6:

[muppetminge]

look i'm not going to pretend like my generation didn't have models that weighed less than a bag of sand and airbrushing in the magazines and all that shit because we did and that was fucked up too

but i get so like. genuinely freaked out by like filters on social media and those kinds of things. it makes me worry for the girls who are growing up with these things as normal. i just can't help but feel like a filter that tries to *correct* your fucking face in real time must be so so so much worse than what we had? even just the "silly/fun" ones still smooth out your skin and shave off half your nose and reshape your face. so many phones have magic smoothing as an automatic feature on the front cams. so it's like not even an active choice or something you're aware of. and so much of this world is based on selfies and videos so you're gonna be seeing it *constantly*. you take a selfie for fun but the photo is unrecognisable. it's not you. if that's not a breeding ground for body dysmorphia i don't know what is.

and we knew that those "model standards" were unrealistic and unattainable and they still fucked us up! but today you're seeing your peers all made up like that online and logically that must connect into a feeling of like. that should be attainable? but it's still not! and idk but that can't be fucking healthy.

it just feels like to me there's a difference between seeing heidi klum or whoever and then your classmate maria posting pictures with perfect skin, straightened nose, whitened teeth. it's like the insane otherworldly standards we grew up with has been pulled down into everyday life. idk i just don't think it's coincidence that today we have 15 year olds sharing anti-aging routines and wearing 5 layers of makeup just to leave the house. the standards for a normal face has been digitally altered

[parab0mb]

“If Crosscode is so great why isn’t there a Crosscode 2?!”

Crosscode 2:

OH WHAT A BEAUTIFUL THING TO WAKE UP TO

[sheastri]

Heart of a Woman ft. Lando Norris

Synopsis : In which the only thing that's saving him is the heart of the woman who loves him.

Pairing: Lando Norris x black!fem!reader

Genre: Boderline Horror

Warning(s): Cheating

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

username oh he has her all the way fucked up

username atp she wants it to happen bc why even stay??

username in the sense that... username idk abt this one bookie

username ok but who in their right mind would cheat of THEE Y/N

username This is so shady… Do it again!🥱

username y/n, js lemme know if i need to run a fade girl

username Only thing that's saving you is the heart of a woman. 

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

Question is, why I do the things I do. Answer I may never find, but I'll always choose you.

"Come on, pick up the phone." You say to yourself after seeing the posts all over social media. You had called 5 times prior and you were just hoping for a miracle at this point before you heard Lando's voice come through the phone.

"Hey y/n, what's up?" Lando says nonchalantly.

"What's up? Do you think I'm dumb? Like seriously." You say heated.

"What's this about? I'm lowkey lost." He responds again almost uncaring but with an edge in his tone.

"Now me and you both know you saw the pictures all over your timeline so I don't even know why you try. Who's the girl?" You say before letting out a sigh, not even mad anymore just tired.

"Which one?" He replies now sounding annoyed.

"Oh? So it's like that? Forget this then." You say sick of his shit.

"No, y/n wait. Look I know what I did was wrong but you weren't meeting my needs and she was just there." Lando says with full conviction, as if his reasoning is some amazing thing.

"The fuck? What do you mean she was just there?" You say mockingly.

"Well look at where you were and where she was... plus it was just a night out. Probably a one time thing." Lando says still trying to justify his actions.

"Just a night out?" You say raising your voice again.

"Y/n, you're just being overly dramatic and paranoid. Me and her are friends and we were just hanging out, you know? Like friends do!" He says snarky.

"You must have me mistaken for boo-boo the fool because everybody can tell there's something going on." You respond back with the same tone he used.

"But they don't know us baby, they don't understand our dynamic. I don't even do half the things I do with you with her." He says in a baby voice.

You stay silent, mulling over his words.

"Please forgive me love, I won't hang out with her anymore if it makes you feel uncomfortable." He says in the same tone, almost pleading.

"Thank you baby, you're forgiven." You say softly.

"Talk to you later babe?" He says.

"Yeah, I love you." You say all smiley.

"Love you too." He says finally before hanging up.

Wanna give up on you, but damn, I know I can't. I put the blame on me for giving you chance after chance

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

liked by imanirowe, landonorris, and 289,000 others

yourusername love my man real bad

username this is not it...

username his face being turned away in the photos should make something click in her head likeee

username this feels like a humiliation ritual...

username i feel like this is a sign to go back to my ex

username don't do it girl

username this man could push her granny down the stairs and she would come running back into his arms

username oh you got it username not one lie was told

username free my queen from this white devil, amen!!

username I hope to never reach this level of delusion.

username In love with you, but can't stand this and I try to be strong, but how much can I take?

liked by mclaren, ln4, and 349,000 others

landonorris monaco

yourusername my race winner

username the way he didn't even like her comment

username and not one photo with y/n in it

username and i'm hearing some ppl thought a whole different girl was his gf

username the way he almost looked disappointed to see y/n but maybe im looking into it tm

username no bc I saw it too

username congrats on the win lando!

username dpmo

username Put your words on your life this time and I hope your ass ain't lyin' 'cause...

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

Only thing that's saving you is the heart of a woman.

You guys were now at Lando’s house after a long and silent car ride. The argument you guys had over text still fresh in both of your minds. He was sitting on the couch and you were standing with a drink in your hand.

"I hope you know that we're still continuing the discussion that we had earlier." You say straight up.

"Do we really have to get back to it? Why are we still on this topic." He says before sighing.

"We can't just laugh everything off because you don't feel like talking about it." You reply rolling your eyes.

"Can't you just get over it? I didn't think it was that serious." He says.

"Get over it? Lando, this is not just some silly little problem that won't mean anything in a couple days. It's the fact that you've cheated multiple times." You say now yelling.

"I didn't even cheat, it's just the way the media is spinning things. Maybe if you got off social media and talked to me more we wouldn't be here." He says in a matter a factly tone.

"Are you serious? Anytime I try and talk to you it's like I'm talking to a wall. Even when I call your phone, do you know how many times I have to call before you pick up?" You say annoyed and frustrated.

"Maybe if you were more interesting I'd be more eager to answer the phone." He says.

"Oh, but I'm the problem right?" You say raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, you are actually. Glad we could finally agree on something." He says.

You're about to respond when you actively feel the gears turning in your head as something clicks.

"Yeah, no. I'm wasting my time here. I don't think you've liked me for the longest time now, you just enjoy stringing me along and driving me insane. We're done." You say calmly as you walk away to go and get your suitcase and leave.

"Wait, what do you mean we're done?" Lando yells out as you walk away.

It's my mind and my soul versus your pride. Nigga, check your ego 'cause I left mine at the door

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

liked by imanirowe, oscarpiastri, and 457,000 others

yourusername the men in your books will never disappoint you

landonorris pretty girl

username be gone evil username he rlly tried ts

username wait... this is new territory, I'm scared

username ya'll don't get too excited, we don't want a repeat of last time

username oh ts broke me, everybody thought she was free and then next post they're hand in hand

username she rlly shines when there's not a man in the bg tryna out mog her

username In love with you but can't stand your ways and I try to be strong...

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

Lando Norris has uploaded a story

Caption: Her.

username it seems like he only rlly applies pressure when she decides she's done

username fumble of the century

username me when i realize the baddest bitch i'll ever have in my lifetime is finally choosing herself and not me

username so glad she finally left this bum

username But how much can I take?

liked by imanirowe, oscarpiastri, and 397,000

yourusername life when you're not with somebody who hates you

username so incredibly real

imanirowe WE OUTSIDE THIS SUMMERRR

username i love this era on her

username so glad that he who shall not be named is gone

username oscar in the likes?? he's def plotting

username i was SICK of him

username Only thing that's saving you (no, I can't take it no more, I'm 'bout to walk out the door)

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

A/N: My whole google search is what would a cheating man say, can't wait to clear it up with the next ficcccc.

[galactic-rhea]

you know, maybe I'm wrong, but my interpretation of Anakin/Vader and Redeemed Anakin is that he pretty much is aware he's terrible. He pretty much thinks of himself as a monster even before becoming Vader, he considers himself one as soon as he had to leave Shmi to survive as a slave alone while he got to become The Chosen One and travel the stars (his basic understanding of love is self-sacrifice), he knows the tusken massacre was bad, he knows murdering disarmed Dooku was bad; he knew turning against the jedi and helping Palpatine was bad; he's extremelly self aware of his violence and hates himself for it.

I think it's easy to think of him as nonchalant or as sort of a shameless dick about it all because his General At War Persona was to be jokey and pretend he's having fun. He's very confident on his ability for Murder (tm), he (tragically) became one of the Best general jedis in the order by becoming good at murder, he's useful when he's being murderous at the right people; so he has no doubts on his abilities on this regard; that doesn't mean he isn't aware of how fucked up and cruel it is, but he keeps doing it, and it's all he knows; he was born in violence, raised in violence, taught to yield a extremelly dangerous weapon, groomed into violence, rewarded for violence, cheered for violence, with Ahsoka then he had to teach violence, and then violence just became something that ran in his blood, it came to him easily, too easily because he was never given the means to deal with such a extreme hyperviolent paradigm. So yep, he knows he's good at murder and little self-preservation.

And he probably despised himself for it, he saw himself as less than a being with human rights, he saw himself as a weapon and he hated not being seen as a person, and at some point he became apathic about it, the fight left him as soon as he had no future with a family. As Vader his hate and anger is just cold fury, is mostly apathy and a void of emotions, there's just pain and self-disgust and regret and old anger, there's not even trying to be something else anymore, it's all he's ever been good at and all he's being asked to do.

So redeemed Anakin (which canonically just means Ghost Anakin lmao) acting oblivious or playing the dumb or victim card it's just something I can't even imagine him to do; like Anakin is aware of being violent and messed up and Bad, but he is completely unable to concieve the idea of having been a victim because besides violence, Anakin's other big trait is that he never ever processes trauma and he horrifically has a history of blaming himself instead of the people who owned him.

This guy, when he was at his best as a Jedi, was pathologically prone to suicidal missions even when it wasn't a necessity, he thinks he's an asset, a means for his superiors to impose their stance and chose to own it, instead of blaming his superiors he just hates himself because he can't stop pathetically reliving when he left his mom behind, when he carried her corpse, when he retaliated against even innocents including kids, when he hurt Padmé, all the times he failed, and the he lived in his personal, fitly created just for him, inferno and had no plans to escape it until one certain sunshine farmer showed up, and all because he thinks he deserves the torture and the abuse and being owned because he's just good at murder and nothing else.

So yeah, no one probably hates him more than himself. Someone could tell Ghost Anakin he's a monster, the worst thing that ever happened in the galaxy and he would say "Yes." And no attempts at arguing or whatsoever, his dignity couldn't be lower if he tried, he would half-heartly agree if someone like Luke said the emperor did him wrong by, y'know, torture him? But then he would also say something like "Well, yes, but cruelty is the way of the Sith, what else could be expected", he's just terribly messed up and couldn't stop himself from defending, at least a little, his literal groomer and abuser and master, and he certainly won't expect forgiveness, like,,,,at all. He can, and will, make excuses for people directly hurting him, but he also would retaliate in terrible ways against anyone, guilty or not, if it meant doing it for someone he cared about.

So Anakin is just...used to being used, and falls easily into being used because it's what he knows best, freedom feels useless and uncertain after he lost padmé.

It's an increíble vicious circle: He worked himself hard to be useful because being useful it's what makes people like him and a means of survival, he then hates himself for being just useful and loosing his personhood, and because he hates himself and thinks he doesn't deserve any sort of...human rights, he keeps on being a mere weapon, an object, but what a good and expensive weapon at least, repeat.

So nope, this guy would be completely unable to even dare to play the victim or excuse himself, even less act as if he doesn't understand he did wrong.

[dashflashy-arts]

ML x Smiling Critters Au

Students by day! Heroes by... any other time of the day. When people transform into weird creatures and terrorize the locals, it's up to Dogday and Catnap to save the day! And keep everyone alive, of course!... hopefully. Honestly, both Dennis and Theo are just trying to get through the day and attempt to maintain little normalcy that's left in their city

Could there be more to this weird phenomena than just random coincidences? Was this all planned? Will they ever find the rumored Ladybug Miraculous that is said to repair everything?

WELL Y'ALL IDK GUYS BC HONESTLY I ONLY DREW THIS FOR FUN AND AS STRESS RELIEF AND I'M FAR TOO BUSY AND TIRED TO EVEN TRY AND DRAW ANOTHER FANCOMIC JWDJDUDJFJDD

That's not to say I don't have ideas or a somewhat cohesive plot in mind for this little dumb au

Read them under the cut:

Idk if y'all even bothered to see the other post about this Au, but basically it's like a human AU where it's MOSTLY normal like. Playtime Co. didn't rly exist. Orphans were not expiramented. Maybe some grew up and became adults themselves etc. Ngl I haven't figured this part out properly, but basically a family had a hold of these miraculouses which made like, a secret orgs thst tests their abilities or something. Then stuff happens with like whistleblowing and an Agreste(tm) event. Tho to sum up my scattered thoughts on this part: they used to have all the miraculouses, but someone stole it away from them. Unfortunately for them, someone important got rly sick so they're rly desperately finding the others (LB and Cat Miraculous mostly) to cure them and yeah the current butterly user (Harley Sawyer at this point) is carrying his predecessor's wishes, but w/ an ulterior motive of course. Why is he a robot here? Mmm ngl I don't rly have any other reason for it. Just wanted to draw a robot w/ some butterfly motifs

Okay, for the story, the "toys" are just normal people, but they become their "toy" selves upon akumatization. Idk whether to base it more on the toy lore or in-game lore but I might just have to merge them both (but leaning more on toy-lore, hopefully)

There will be like, um, a mix of aging-up here, like the Smiling Critters and Nightmare Critters here are teenagers, but some characters like the human vers. of Mommy long legs is an adult. I am trying to understand the game lore but I won't be very accurate bc again, I' not rly active with it so sorry die-hard fans 🤷‍♀️

Enough of that, here are some thoughts of the main protags:

Dennis Dantes is the likable cheery athlete in school. You could say he's popular, but he doesn't rly hang out with the popular kids for too long. He'd rather spend time with the friends he made since he was young. Dennis is just honest and simple like that. He is a natural leader, but he only lets that shine through as Dogday.

Theodore Grambell is the opposite. He's a loner, troublemaker, and sleepy student that professors dislike to have in class. And yet, he is beloved by his friends, Dennis mostly! While he keeps quiet as himself, he's nearly dead silent as Catnap. He lets Dogday take the lead with saving the day, but at the end of the day, it's his cataclysm that really matters in an akuma crisis. Unlike Dennis, he knows a lot more about the miraculous stuff, thanks to some... shady figure

When the first meeting, Catnap and Dogday weren't sure of each other. It took some time and akuma-fighting for Dogday to actually understand Catnap, and for Catnap to tolerate Dogday's overbearing "as heroes, we have to blah blah blah" mindset. This is ironic, btw, because as civilians, they are both the bestest of friends. Closest. Dennis always pounces at Theo every time he sees him, then talks his ear off, and Theo wouldn't mind, and would just be happy to be with him

Story starts with Dennis getting his miraculous via finding it in his locker. Theo got his few weeks prior (thanks to shady figure). Since this is an alt universe, events went differently, so kwamis like Barkk behave a little differently from canon. Barkk here is a lot more strict with rules and has to asert common sense to Dennis when he gets too carried away by his heart. That said, Dennis and Barkk are good with each other. As for Plagg, he and Theo are awkward AF. I imagine that Theo's not much of a conversationalist in general, so you can guess who does most of the talking. Plagg's also desperately trying to convince Theo that MAYBE idk that the shady guy is??? Not to be trusted?? It falls on deaf ears, unfortunately

There ARE guardians of the miraculouses here lol they just don't have the Ladybug miraculous bc the former user crashed out and dipped. They are searching for it and later on, after Dennis meets them, he helps them search for it

Do their friends get a miraculous? Do the nightmare critters get a miraculous too (then cause mayhem?) Maybe, maybe not. Heehehehehee ( =＾ω＾)

OH also this AU is set in 2005 bc um to match the game setting idk [insert South Arcade - 2005]

[just-some-sorta-person]

I think about Zantetsu’s emotional intelligence sometimes

How he immediately understood Reo’s importance to Nagi with a few vague words, and his “Nagi..” in the extra from the end of 2nd sel. when Nagi was worried abt Reo.

When Zantetsu asks Nagi why he plays soccer and Nagi responds "It's because of Reo, or more like Reo's fault", he's immediately intrigued. He understands that there must be more to Nagi's feelings.

When Nagi goes on to say "All I'm doing is tagging along", Zantetsu doesn't take his words at face value and assume Nagi is just going with the flow like he's saying. Instead, he sees Nagi saying he's there because of Reo, and understands that Nagi wouldn't be there if he didn't want to or had no reason due to his objection to hard work.

Taking these things into account, Zantetsu concludes that "It's Reo's fault" and "I'm tagging along" means Nagi is most likely here because he likes Reo, and asks his next question under that assumption. "What's so great about that guy? (that you would go so far for him)"

He reads inbetween the lines. Nagi never said he liked Reo and did all this because he liked him. But Zantetsu heard these things and immediately clocked Nagi’s dedication

Then when Nagi said Reo was the first to show interest in him, Zantetsu says Nagi may be weird but he’s not a bad guy. And I think that’s him acknowledging Nagi’s gratefulness toward Reo, and the dedication that results from that.

Something Reo still hasn't understood throughout Nagi and Reo's entire friendship, Zantetsu understood in a short conversation. We can compare this to when Reo had a similar interaction with Nagi.

You could say Nagi's being even more direct here. (Direct, for him). "I don't wanna play soccer but being with you isn't a pain, so its fine" This pretty heavily implies that Nagi only plays soccer/endures it because he enjoys Reo's company. Reo doesn't get this. To be fair to him though, it's always a harder thing to get when it happens to you, as opposed to when you're an outsider.

I think Zantetsu has a point when he says truly smart people are too kind to point out the dumbness of others. In the sense that nagi and reo have no problem being mean girls TM and they are very emotionally immature, despite being geniuses. (Or maybe because..?)

They are also just emotionally immature in general due to being teenagers. Being smart simply =|= maturity it seems.

[liarvibe]

This ask grants you permission for one (1) uninterrupted yap session.

Wise usage not recommended.

You know what--since we were talking about it before and stuff, I'm going to talk about something I've personally experienced in this fandom and have been witnessing others experiencing it currently as well--and that is this fandoms utter lack of acceptance for the "weird" and "abnormal" takes--or what they ACTUALLY are--takes people just don't agree with.

This mainly pertains to my and an friends theories and analyses that have been scrutinized for years at this point, but it also pertains to a new theory about Byakuya Togami being Mentally Unwell that I've been on and off reading.

And the hate certain people have been giving this theory.

For one thing, I actually like the theorizing done by @duhhtheyellowrose. It showcases a different, interesting, and most importantly, extremely valid interpretation of Byakuya! Again I haven't had the energy lately to read everything they've been writing, but what I have read has given me a much greater appreciation for Togami as a character because before, I thought of him as a very flat, prideful rich kid who's whole character arc was bruising that pride and bringing him down to earth. Not a bad arc, but just... simple, kinda boring. I love deep dives like this into a character's psyche and really thinking about their motivations and thoughts and feelings. What I HAVE read of Yellow's theories has done exactly that--it's given Togami more depth and dwells on the rather harsh pressure he grew up with, and what exactly that can do to a person's mind going forward.

Like yeah, actually, Byakuya having to fight his half siblings to be the chosen heir, no matter how you spin it, is really fucked up! That kind of pressure and strive for perfectionism does horrible things to a person's mental health, especially when they falter and crumble in a way that isn't their picture-perfect self.

And yet. Once again, there are people going off in this fandom insisting that Byakuya Togami can't be 'suicidal'. He just can't be! Nevermind the horrible statement that is, saying that a person in any position Cannot Be Suicidal, because even the Happiest Person on Earth can have suicidal idealization--it's just blatantly disregarding an interpretation and saying it's "mischaracterization" simply because you don't like it.

Also, I've seen people go so far as saying that giving Togami mental ailments or making him a more complex character is making him. Softer? I'm sorry that you have this idea about mental illnesses that makes you think people with them are "softer" and less of an asshole just because they have a reason to be an asshole, but also no I'm not sorry, please actually think about what you're saying. You're saying that people who are assholes cannot have a reason to be an asshole and thus othering people you deem as "jerkish" or even "evil" just because you don't want to admit they are human.

This is just one example of how this fandom can jump through horrible mental hoops just to justify their "take" on a character--but also hate on another take they don't agree with or like. It's the same shit I've talked about before where people infantize Gonta to make Kokichi look like more of a monster than he actually is. Because if Gonta is a big stupid dumb monkey who Kokichi manipulated, it makes things easy--bad guy gets to not be a Person(tm) anymore ("So I get to hate him as much as I want and feel justified in hating him") while the Poor Innocent Babu gets to have their Purity and never be wrong, ever. ("So I feel justified in liking this character without having to tackle the idea that maybe they did something wrong because they cannot be blamed and I cannot be wrong!")

Don't you guys see how utterly boring that is? To simplify characters to the point where they're not even people? Like sure, sometimes you need a character who is a Symbol and doesn't need to be anything more than that for narrative purposes... but like. These characters aren't meant to be symbols of evil or assholery or whatever. They are meant to represent a person with thoughts and feelings and ideals, with dreams and heartbreaks and complexities that make them unique as an individual.

I think making post after post trying to "debunk" someone's interpretation is just making you look like an asshole. I think fighting over what interpretation is right vs what one is wrong is jsut not the play.

Like--in the Undertale fandom! If someone had an interpretation you didn't like? That's an AU now! See, isn't that more fun? Now you can engage with the interpretations you don't agree with in a more constructive and positive way. It's also the first step in accepting different interpretations without them having to be "AUs" because it promotes critical thinking and acknowledging that Literary Analysis is actually an art, not a science. It's never factual. It never WAS. Literary Analyses (or writing metas/theory crafting as the kids call it these days--like Literary Theory is why it's called Theorycrafting, people!) is all about interpretation of text, and there is no objective way to do so. It's all subjective!

I maintain the sentiment from my theory blog, to my old personal, to this one--No analyses done in good faith are ever "wrong", not unless you are: 1. Doing a meta to hate on something, 2. including bigotry in your meta, or 3. otherwise being malicious (whether intentionally or unintentionally so).

If you correct yourself when you make a mistake (in that you display unintentional malice or bigotry) and aren't actively being an asshole, then any and all interpretations you come up with is correct! So is the person who's come to the opposite conclusions as you. Yes you are both correct. No it does not matter how opposite they are from you. No it doesn't matter if their interpretation changes the whole character from your perspective.

You can dislike it, but accept that it's valid. Move on. Or, maybe analyze the other interpretation with a open mind--maybe you'll actually come to like aspects of it! If you just hate on it without giving it a chance, you'll never know.

So yeah. That's what I'm gonna yap about with this ask. Hope you guys don't mind!

[king-candybug-backup]

I thought of a really dumb crack ship but the more I think about it the more I'm like. Wait why is this kinda working

Markowski x candybug

Specifically post killswitch candybug. Obv I don't know how killswitch ends but I'm gonna assume he 1. Lives. And 2. Eventually starts to Chill Out. This is the foundation

They meet somewhere very coincidentally and engage in awkward small talk (intentionally awkward on turbos part. He thinks it's funny to watch markowski get more and more anxious)

Markowski at some point mentions how much he hates his game. Turbo then goes 'are you a major character?? No? Why not just leave. The players wont notice lmao'

Revolutionary thought for markowski. He's of course like nooo I would never I would neverrr. But the thought is planted. He can't stop thinking about it. After a particularly bad work day he goes to seek out turbo intentionally (maybe vanellope gang go to tappers idk) and talk to him.

Markowski is like ok I'm kinda really considering it. But what would I do all day?? Turbo is like 'what I do all day. Whatever the hell I want'

I invision this branching slowly into markowski starting to hang around sugar rush more, trying to work up the courage to talk to Calhoun about ditching hero's duty. Thus begin slow friendship. The actual romance is very slowburn lmao.. but I can't get the picture of domestic markowski/turbug out of my head 😭 what if they make a house right on the outskirts of sugar rush. A very big house that can fit the small kaiju. What if markowski picks up creative hobbies and it inspires candy to try out some new hobbies himself??

What would this ship even be called. Candykowski? Candykow 😭 I kinda like candykow actually

I'm. Rahh. Losing my mind. This is gutters anon btw breaking into your inbox with more Thoughts tm

SOBBING MY EYES OUT LMFAO

WELL, I HAVE CERTAINLY SHIPPED WEIRDER, I COULD SEE IT 😂😂😂 Honestly has a lot of fun potential ashgdgfjvbmjnk

Markowski: I'm too afraid of Cy-bugs to continue Hero's Duty

Also Markowski: *starts dating a Cy-bug*

Calhoun: EXCUSE ME WHAT THE FU-

[forsaken-headcanons]

Part two of dumb Forsaken x Rain World skin yap, Scav Shedletsky let's go

Surprisingly the spoilers here would be for Inv/Enot

I don't have as many ideas for this one since I haven't been thinking about it as much but I still have a few.

Would the other side of the Scav Chieftain mask that Arti 1x would have, of course on the other side of the face. Also I think the shirt would say "Thanks, Andrew" instead of "Blame John" cuz that gives the same vibes to me. Also image of Inv on shirt. The back would either be similar to what it is except for Rain World Arena TM, or like. Either the dialogue that plays when you stay on invs play screen for too long, or the beginning dialogue of Inv's dumb dating sim. Though those last two would either be too long or get nuked by Roblox so probably stick to Rain World Arena TM

Spear would be an electric spear, since I'm pretty sure the only way to get those are from scavengers. If not, it's mostly known for scavengers. Chicken would probably be blue fruit. Or maybe- what are they called, gooeyducks? Those are similar to blue fruit function wise but fill two food pips instead of one, and there's two uses to the ability, so.

Anyways yeah I think that's all for that

2/2.

[umbra-borealis]

Dimitri Lousteau is the most 'human' villain in Sly Cooper

Hello and welcome to my TEDtalk, I've been meaning to type out my yapping for a long time but always talked myself out of it because I mean, this is coming from a guy with Dimitri for a pfp and I figured people would just take it as a guy on tumblr simping for a weird lizard but no. The reasons I care for Dimitri the way I do goes pretty deep and I could sit here and talk about it point by point but to save us both some time (and because I am DEAD tired) I made a graph!

I used Luciano, my little sona, to personify myself in this.

I focused mainly on formative things and similarities in personality without inserting headcanons, even if based on traits or even symptoms I recognize. Most of these are rather straight forward but some run a little deeper. The funny pattern here (maybe aside from the drug thing lol) is that there's a high likelihood that you reading this right now can at least relate to just one or two things on those list and while you could argue that you could do the same with other characters, I picked these traits because in my opinion they ride that thin line between just relatable enough to apply to a lot of people, but not too superficial to be on the same an interest or hobby. Anyone can get upset when angry, it's HOW you express that anger that says something about you as a person for instance.

I also want to quickly mention that yes, a LOT of characters in Sly Cooper are very human, but I said 'villain' for a reason. After all I don't think your average college kid can relate to Contessa, Rajan or Panda King because mass brainwashing, destroying villages and being a literal drug lord are bordering on supervillain and that's not what Dimitri is. A supervillain can be relatable to a degree as well, but it makes sense that the Panda King had to have a whole Moment TM (several really) to come to terms with the kind of person he allowed himself to become. When we see Dimitri in Sly 3, he seems to have already done this perhaps because his sins aren't nearly as great. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

I'll insert a read-more here but I'd like to ask you to keep reading anyway if you can because my biggest pet peeve is that Dimitri is seen as a dumb, sleazy (and old??? which is dumb and I got math to back up that he's not in fact in his 40s during Sly 2 lmao) lizard who's only good as a level 1 boss for beginners to learn the game and all he's remembered for, though fair, is his manner of speech and not what he's REALLY saying. None of you ever picked up on what he was throwing down so I'm going to spell it out for you.

(PS I have ADHD and it's 3 AM so go easy on me this is coming from the HEART baby)

To make it easier on myself and you, I'm going to start sectioning the word soup in my head into four categories based on Dimitri's enterprises and roles and just kinda... waffle on about my thoughts regarding them. I'll start superficial and work my way down to the Deep Shit. Feel free to skip around to whatever interests you since I include some lore too, though changes are you're already aware of said lore.

Lets start with:

Dimiti, the club manager.

Nightclubs, and the people that run them tend to have a bit of a sleazy stereotype attached to them, which I suppose is fair. Though a large chunk is attributed to movies and other media, there were in fact some really large and important movements surrounding nightlife and club culture. Just look up the Club Kids if you want to go down a rabbit hole, in short they were a fairly large group of partiers from the 90s who contributed a LOT to fashion and art movements as well as being generally very fluid when it came to gender. Unfortunately that too would eventually be plagued by drugs and members getting addicted to drugs. Again, I digress.

Dimitri is seen partying in the intro of his chapter in Sly 2,

which is a nice touch because not only is it in-character, it's something that would actually happen. Owners of a popular joints would be popular or just enigmatic figures that would regularly get subjected to patrons schmoozing up to them. Some weren't a fan but there were many that soaked up the attention, bought rounds on the house when business was good, maybe get a little TOO cocky with confidence. It's a bit too simple to look at Dimitri in relation to all this info and say 'no doi he was in it for the money it checks out.' because if you spend enough time in his club or just, in the safe house after placing the bug there's signs of more going on.

We KNOW Dimitri is a criminal and he did his whole art forgery business on the side, or maybe it's the other way round? Either way he seemed fairly confident in his skills with this. His biggest risk being that time he tried to marry someone over a STATUE. (Really dude?) So then why was he so damn paranoid? While you could argue that he was sippin' his own supply I don't think that's what it was. He was so paranoid he played his music super loud in almost all areas of the club JUST to keep his security detail awake through-out night and day, whenever his club wasn't open to the public. To compensate he would promise them they could all 'retire early'. with that fake confidence chuckle that masks a sense of 'haha please don't abandon me'

So, ever heard of Imposter Syndrome? Because his behavior as a club owner SCREAMS it. He wasn't JUST cocky and sleazy, he was simply fitting in with the culture of the time because *everyone* was overly confident, over confidence was something to be admired, something to look at and go 'yeah that guy has it figured out' while in reality most struggled with something, anything. So what is Imposter Syndrome? To keep it short and blunt, the overwhelming feeling that you're not worthy of your accomplishments. We know that Dimitri is a 'failed' artist who turned to forging art to make money, it could just be a sense of guilt telling him something he's not ready to hear so he starts overcompensating and this insecurity bleeds into Sly 3 after Sly puts him in his place. His success with this insanely toxic coping mechanism lands him a new enterprise.

Dimitri, the Spice distributor.

Rather than going chronological, I'm going through the 'layers' that is this lizard. So if his career as a club owner is the tip of the ice berg with some neat little facts and info about the stereotype he conveys, this subject is a tier deeper. Dimitri the Spice distributor is Dimitri the next level criminal, or so he thinks. When you think about it, it's pretty strange that they gave Dimitri some Clockwerk parts at all. He was never mentioned by the other Klaww Gang members and thus seemingly not missed either when he was the first to get busted. In fact, nobody was upset that their DISTRIBTOR was arrested, putting a hold on their primary income... or so we thought until the Contessa was revealed to have a rather large and lucrative side hussle Dimitri probably could never compete with. Dimitri was expendable, sure he had a role and he played it well but he was also a loss they could cope with without much harm done to their wallets or their pride.

I think about it often, Dimitri in his jail cell, maybe hearing from another criminal or even his lawyer after the whole Clock-La thing about the full scope of the plan. He might've gotten a reduced sentence for ratting the other members out because if you think back to his legendary conversation with Sly he really doesn't seem to know what he's talking about. ("What is it with clocks bro!?") All of Dimitri's other crimes aside, he was young and naive, Sly 3 reveals he came from some form of poverty as well so it makes sense that he'd chase easy money. That's all it was though, he wanted the money and the fame, he didn't want to brainwash an entire city, he didn't know about the giant robot owl. He's once again left feeling like a failure, this time one that was easy to fool and all the confidence he had as a criminal would've seeped out of him, starting this weird cycle of him trying something only to be caught breaking the law and ending up where he began.

Like I said all of this would bleed into Sly 3 and it's pretty damn neat that for how little lines he had and how little he was on screen, they managed to convey this well in my opinion. By the time we reach Sly 3, most of us don't remember him as a Spice distribtor at all. Which leads me to...

Dimitri the Artist.

Being an artist is a pretty broad term and while we know Dimitri as a painter, I think he applies his artist mindset in way, way more. He's genuinely creative an smart, he thinks out of the box to protect his secrets and to cover his tracks. His identity as an artist is also his most vulnerable and 'real' self. Folks will say art is about self expression and usually mean conveying complex topics with pretty pictures or thought provoking stories, however it can be apparent in smaller ways too and the most obvious thing for Dimitri is his business in forging art. Think about it this way:

Picture you don't speak a LICK of english, you're from a lower in-come family or even straight up poverty but you grew up on tall tales of your grandpa being a total badass who lived freely and seizes every opportunity he could to make money... or take it rather but you get the idea. Your grandpa used his talents as a diver and deep down, you know what your talent is. It's art. So you somehow manage to move across the world to Paris, go to an art school work your ass off to develop your own style, your own identity and when it came to making a name for yourself you were rejected super hard. You're now probably in debt, in a foreign country and all you're known for is being the art community's clown.

One thing that gets overlooked is that Dimitri's paintings aren't actually that bad.

He very clearly knows the basics quite well, he's using color theory to shade and add depth but as he goes from student to independant artist, he breaks away from the basics and develops a style. His color use becomes brighter, he adds little stars just because why not? He likes em! This style is PERFECT for the nightlife club scene he ends up in down the line of course, but in the world of pretentious parisian artist hipsters? Absolutely not. So while he's just being himself, he's shown that that isn't allowed, that wont get him success. It reminds me of artists who say shit like 'I'll just learn to draw furry porn I guess!' thinking it's a guaranteed money printer (heh) and whether they enjoy making that kind of content is irrelevant, which leads to burn out or in case they DO find success, imposter syndrome. The dread that you do not deserve this recognition because it's not something you're actually that passionate about, not something you want to be known for. Say what you will about Dimitri but he never compromised. And while the cutscene shows shoddy painted depictions of classical paintings, I think this was more to illustrate him forging paintings to a younger audience than imply he was a bad painter as just before those crappy version, we see what's probably the REAL version he would've painted and sold.

This is conjecture on my part but I have to believe it because well, art forgery is HARD. You'd have to actually be a freaking genius to do it and sell it for so high, you can just afford what is basically a freaking opera house in PARIS and turn it into a nightclub. Also did I mention Dimitri just, HAS a ~mansion~ in Monaco? Because he does.

I've also always liked that scene for the expression on his face. It's smug, it's so full of petty, passve aggressive anger, a stubborness to admit defeat and instead to just 'prove a point' even if that point is lost to the means being SUPER illegal. That being sad, I don't think any of us feel bad over this man stealing a couple thousand from billionaire pockets. Billionaires that probably have their own little illicit ways to get that cash. Funny... It seems Sly isn't the only one who steals from other criminals.

And you might've stuck around this long and gone 'Umbra, get to the fucking POINT already." to which I have good news.

Dimitri, the Marine Iguana.

My favorite part, feel free to skip ahead to this headline if you want.

So who is this guy anyway? Well, from Sly 3 we see that he has a mother, a sister and his grandparents and that's about it as far as we can tell.

Just look at that smile! He looks like your average, awkward teenager. No struggling on the streets from what we can tell, no bullying by bigger kids, no weird sociopathic tendencies, no childhood trauma or grudges. The events that changed him seem to all have happened after he left for Paris. Sure it aint much to go off of but even if his life was hard, it seemed he was close with his grandfather and got to know him for a decent couple of years. Marine Iguanas are, like the name implies, an aquatic species of reptile. They're well adapted to land but due to low food availability in-land, they migrated to the beaches and started living off of sea algae, learning how to dive in the process. Even in Sly 2 the devs included plenty of references to Dimitri's affinity for water. The windows in the dancefloor area of his club are partially submerged, there are two massive aquariums in his office, he lives on a boat (or hides there anyway) and has several water features but inside and outside his club.

When you take a step back and look at all that, Dimitri is... just a guy who left his home country, his family, to follow a dream only to have that dream shatter and he's left to pick up the pieces all alone, making poor choices in the process. Choices based on anger and a broken heart. And the truth of the matter is that ALL of this, could happen to anyone. Granted in varying different ways as not everyone's life is the same and not everyone will make the same choices but I think many of us had a dream career as a kid only to become a jaded adult who thinks it's unrealistic or only does that thing as a hobby, I think there's many of us that remember the moment our hearts were broken and we realized the cold, unforgiving nature of real, adult life.

We see the effect of ALL of this come to a head in Sly 3, when at first he's not sure if he should still be mad at Sly for putting him in jail while he's currently the only guy he knows that COULD break him back out of jail as well. He still overcompensates, he's still overly confident and he put himself in that cell but still, he honors his word and helps Sly and Bentley find their friend. Then in Holland we see him behind a bar, seemingly as if he's actually got a job as a bartender there. Heck, he DOES have a job! He's the announcer! He may not super like it but he's being humbled by it all the same and when Sly comes for help a second time, the bravado is gone for a moment. He expresses genuine fear, not necessarily for his own safety but for losing a job, for *failing*. Of course the right answer in this scenario is to hype up his confidence again. And because Sly has proven himself to be trustworthy in the past he figures he can trust him with a favor of personal, sentimental value. If anyone would understand how it feels to have your family name dishonored and an heirloom stolen, it's Sly and Dimitri knows that damn well.

I think this is about as real as Dimitri can get, aside from the whole scuba gear thing. I know the gang is disguised but I don't think Dimitri is at all. I think that's just... what he likes to wear, further making me think he's just a regular guy with so much heart ache he lashe out in some pretty vile ways. Tortured artists are known to do some crazy shit after all. And while he continues to be his funny eccentric self we know him to be, he starts to have his first real moments of genuine care and loyalty while a part of the Cooper Gang. He tells Bentley he 'has his own flavor' which is his way of telling him that he's unique an valid the way he is. He dives after Sly's cane in VERY dangerous waters, risking injury or even his life, no questions asked. He sends Bentley postcards and letters to let his friend know he's safe and doing well. But perhaps something that hits me harder than any of that, is how angry and shocked Dimitri looks upon Sly's 'retirement announcement'.

Here he was thinking he made a friend out of Sly, and just like that he was gone. It makes me wonder if he held onto that grudge or not but a part of me likes to imagine that he didn't. I think his time with that gang made him realize that although he might not understand and he might be upset, it's not all about him. If anything he silently continued the rivalry by seeing how many girls he could cram into one post card with him to one up Sly's act of running off with a girl himself or perhaps he took it as a sign to make a career switch as well. Either way, Dimitri ended up changing for the better, he became himself in the end. A sweet, goofball iguana who loves the ocean and loves to paint. Making money became a nice bonus rather than his main focus.

Coming from a similar, rough background, having gone to therapy and trying to find my place in the world, this gives me hope. Hope that if I look hard enough, I can find my niche too and that being myself is the best I can be. If you read all this, thank you. I fgured it was best to just get it ALL out at once. I hope it was a fun read or made you look at Dimitri a little differently.

[antares-8]

I wonder if there's like. Gothic and edgelord teens in the Unknown, Wirt notwithstanding. Something's percolating in my brain, a combination of the flamboyantly evil beast cult of penny dreadfuls and the preteens playing a high stakes game of tag with wirt.

The idea of communing with dark powers and such is very appealing to middle schoolers and such. It's why Ouija boards and bloody mary is popular at sleepovers.

However, there's a lot of edelwoods around. There's at least one decent-sized grove in every town Wirt passes through. This implies to me that everyone knows (or knew?) at least one person who got grabbed by the beast, so as cool and edgy as it would be, the guy's too much of a bastard for anyone to try and summon him over a game of truth or dare. Everyone has a personal grudge against the guy, and no amount of goth aesthetic is gonna change that.

Wirt is not a bastard.

Wirt is more powerful, more dangerous, more edgy, and at the same time less of a threat. Everyone's heard campfire stories about him doing spooky stuff in the woods, but nobody's got a dead friend. Well, except one, but all the evidence says he had it coming.

What's more is, Wirt is relatable. He was sixteen when he got the crown of thorns. Not only is he an elder evil of the endless night, he's a kid like them. One who ran away from home to live in the woods, a common fantasy of kids around the globe.

What I'm saying is, imagine some kid stammering out "wirt palmer, wirt palmer, wirt palmer" three times in a bathroom mirror and then having a mixture of relief and disappointment when nothing happens about it. Imagine some schoolkids making up their "Pilgrim Club (not a cult)(TM)" to be spooky and incorporating misremembered wirt-lore into their chants and rituals (maybe a parallel to the Kung Fu Ghost Hunting Detectives?). Imagine all the things people do in youtube videos with "I _____ at 3AM (NOT CLICKBAIT????)" type titles. Imagine Wirt becoming a cross between Bloody Mary, Bill Cipher, Herobrine, and Slenderman for all the edgy teenagers in the Unknown.

Imagine Wirt learning about this.

Imagine Beatrice learning about this.

I think that teenagers being dumb and having weird interests that shock and scandalize adults is definitely A Thing in the Unknown too, so yes. Definitely. Absolutely. There can be a group of edgy stupid kids (and later, several groups of edgy stupid kids) who mess with dark powers named Wirt.

I imagine it would take quite some time before our boy learned of the existence of these dorks. He'd probably be more bemused than anything, one of those "This is my life now, I guess" things. At least they're slightly less afraid of him.

Beatrice would add this to the long, long list of things she's never letting him live down.

Side note--I've never played Minecraft and had to look up who Herobrine is. You learn something new everyday!

[olderthannetfic]

Hi OTNF!! Sometimes I like to read this fandom problem blog that receives submissions from people all over Tumblr, recently this was posted and I wanted to know what you thought of it: The tag types of "Tags update as story is written" or "additional tags to be added" or "Rating may change." Fuck those. I don't care if you add some extra benign tags as the story goes along, and you realise you wanna add more content that's just there, or you realise your fic maybe went a bit harder than you expected. Some stories get their own life. But at the same time, if you knew you'd want to add certain content, or that the rating was gonna go way up from what you tagged in the beginning, why did you not tag it from the start? Especially when the tagged content becomes a big part of the story, or influences the story strongly. And then you find out that the Author already had been planning adding this type of content for a long time, they just FOR SOME STUPID-ASS REASON didn't wanna add the tag until it actually happens. You're supposed to tag so the people can make an informed decision if they wanna commit to your fic, so for the love of the tagging-system, actually TAG ALL YOUR SHIT FROM THE START. Same shit for changing ratings. I hate it when someone plans from the start to make the story explicit, but doesn't change the rating until they've reached the NSFW sections. There's a reason there's a tagging system. So do you just not understand how that works? Or are you just being kind of as ass on purpose? This does not help when avoiding stories with specific content you try to exclude from your results. It's even dumber if the reason is to "avoid spoiling the fic readers", because anyone coming later to the fic is going to be "spoiled" by the tags regardless. And if you know you wanna add porn, or gore, then rate the story appropriately. Rather categorise it too high, than fuck around with people who don't wanna read explicit content. As a writer who uses the Archive, I want to put my 2 cents in. When I'm writing a fic, a long fic for example, I want to tag the stuff that actually DOES appear at that time so that I'm not clogging other tags/people don't think I'm spamming to inflate my readership (And I DEFINITELY do not want something I worked hard on to get reported for spam). I do get the frustration at reading a fic and then something changes like the rating, but as a writer, sometimes things go off script and one thing that's rated T or M might eventually become E just based off the writing juices doing it's thing(tm). To me, the "Additional tags to be added" is kind of like CNTW, it's something the reader has to make a decision if they want to risk getting invested/read that particular fic. It feels very much like a "damned if you do/damned if you don't" situation. What are some of your thoughts on something like this?

--

Writers are always going to vary in their favorite approach, and readers who act like there's one right answer are idiots.

For me personally, even if I'm posting as I write, I do have a solid idea of where the fic is going, and I strongly prefer—both as a reader and writer—to have all of the tags in place at the beginning.

I also don't like over-tagging for warnings and only want to see/use tags for the basic main content of the fic, which does make it easier to know ahead of time than if I tagged every tiny thing.

I think spoilers are a dumb reason not to tag things.

So I agree with the complainer's tastes...

...but at the same time, they're acting like these ought to be rules, and AO3 is designed to accommodate a lot of different people with different styles, so I think their attitude leaves something to be desired.

[rocksibblingsau]

Sharing one of my favorite songs for Country Brickory to distract myself (and hopefully others) from the ✨on-going horrors✨

It's Thoroughfare by Ethel Cane (mother), the lyrics, low-key vibes and the narrative structure feel so fitting to Branch for me and everytime I hear it I can always clearly picture him singing it about and to Hickory. It's just so... them(tm) in everyway that matters (or maybe its just my delusions speaking to me again, but that's neither here nor there)

And it's also a great song instrumental wise and Ethel's vocals on it are just *chef's kiss", so if you haven't heard it, like recommend giving it a listen :D

"You fell in love with America

When you were twelve years old

And by seventeen you knew you had to see it all

You loved your dad and the love he had for your mother so

You had to get out and go chasin' it's sweet call

I met you there in Texas somewhere on the thoroughfare

On the side of the road in some torn-up clothes

With a pistol in my pocket

I didn't trust no one but you said, "Baby, don't run

I'll take you anywhere"

So I hopped right in, outta luck to spend

And at least your truck beats walking

And you said, "Hey, do you wanna see the West with me?

'Cause love's out there and I can't leave it be"

And I said, "Honey, love's never meant much to me

But I'll come with you if you're sure it's what you need"

So we made off for California

To find your lover, driving day and night

And every small-town diner

Saw our faces at least once or twice

But in these motel rooms

I started to see you differently, oh

'Cause for the first time since I was a child

I could see a man who wasn't angry

And he said, "It's been a long damn time since I left Florida

No one left to leave and no one left to love

But now that I met you, I finally know just where I'm headin'"

And we found Heaven in time

Where your western sunshine met my deep Southern wet

And you got lost in it and yet you found yourself

Hard-pressed for air and sweatin'

And you said, "Hey, do you wanna see the west with me?

(Do you wanna see the West with me?)

'Cause love's out there and I can't leave it be"

(I can't leave it, I can't leave it)

And I said, "Honey, love's never meant that much to me

(Nothing much)

But I'll come with you if you're sure it's what you need"

And once we reached the coast you said, "End of the line"

We finally reach the edge, after all this time

I didn't find my love but I still made it this far without it

And then you turned to me and stared into me deep

And said, "Well, maybe not, 'cause look at what I've got

You might not be my love, but, baby, I doubt it"

And you said, "Hey, do you wanna see the west with me?

(Do you wanna see the West with me?)

'Cause love's out there and I can't leave it be"

(I can't leave it, I can't leave it)

And I said, "Honey, love's never meant that much to me

(Nothing much)

But I'll come with you if you're sure it's what you need"

Yeah

Yeah

Yeah, yeah

Yeah

Yeah

'Cause in your pickup truck with all of your dumb luck

is the only place I think I'd ever wanna be"

ignore the horrors, have some Brickory.

[lemon-russ]

Every fuckin night when my meds wear off and I'm back to dumb ADHD brain that doesn't remember how tired and broke I am, brains like, psssst. I think a baby would probably fix us actually. And im like hmmm you make good points unmedicated brain, maybe being tired and broke and living in a house with Hazards (tm) would be not issues with a baby.

Anyways off I go to draw primarchs holding babies again so I don't take pliers to my arm implant.