#like lily is just not someone you want in a fandom for long

[rewritingcanon]

no girl tell us what you think about jegulily!! im so here for it (tone is weird but I mean that genuinely, I don't ship them so I'm not here to be weird)

dw bae ur tone is fine ! (i’ve been waiting for an ask like this 💀) i think jegulily is... yeah its…. like usually as long as its legal idgaf as long as shippers portray their characters right but regulus fans are literally incapable 😭🙏 WHY WOULD U PAIR A MUGGLEBORN AND A BLOOD SUPREMACIST IM SO DONE WITH DIS FANDOMMMM!! that actually goes for a lot of lily ships like bartylily as well (no clue where that came from either but it’s equally as stupid lmfao).

and jegulily just feels like shoving in lily because people feel bad for ditching her, or shoving in regulus because some people like jily and jegulus and want them (for some reason) to coincide even though it makes zeroooo sense for it to. like, idk if i said this with jegulus before (i yap sm on this account i forget what i say), but like it, jegulily can be done well if a realistic dynamic is taken into account, but the marauders fandom is allergic to nuance and so just chalks up everything regulus does and believes to his neglectful homelife. hes not all-bad, sure, i do feel bad for him, but im nowhere close to shipping him with a woman whos part of the people hes trying to eradicate, or with her man who purposefully went against all pureblood tradition (which is such a large part of james’ character— he is a pureblood that chooses to be seperate from that culture hellooooo plz wake uppppp).

marauders fandom has a chronic “i can fix him” mentality when it comes to wizard neo nazis, i have never understood it. but thats a topic for another day.

jegulily should be filled with envy, toxicity and prejudice stop nerfing it to be some fluffy feel-good polyamorous stable marriage where they raise harry together. yall are looking over the potential. this ship has blood and guts in it plz act like it or else idk what to say 😭 if it doesnt end with at least one of them getting murdered i dont want it.

[breadbrobin]

our little affair

james potter x reader — harry potter; marauders era

[gn!reader]

summary: before three months ago, you hated james potter, and everyone knew it. then everything changed. now, you’re meeting him in dark hallways and he’s leaving hickeys on your neck, and someone is going full private detective to find out just who you’re seeing.

warnings: swearing, kissing, reader and james are in love but they won’t admit it, allusions to sexual content—non-explicit.

word count: 1.2k

(it’s been a WHILE but i’m back and writing for a completely different fandom lollll anyway james has always been the loml and i think he deserves to get made out with in a hallway thank you for coming to my ted talk)

———————————

three months. that’s how long it had taken for someone to figure out you were in love.

to be fair to lily, it had taken you around the same amount of time, and you were inside your own head, with full access to all those innocent and not-so-innocent thoughts 24/7.

it was a little stifling, how she watched you like a hawk to see who you were smiling at, glancing towards, blushing because of. and it was a little more than a little embarrassing that she’d figured you out so easily.

it was stupid, really. a hickey left slightly too high and a shirt collar dipping slightly too low while you studied. that was all it took.

“what is that?” she’d asked accusingly.

“what?” you frowned, looking up at her across the table.

“that.” she jerked her head at you, her eyes locked on your collar. “that’s a hickey.”

“no, it’s not,” you’d hissed sharply, but you’d tugged your collar up far too quickly to play it off anymore. she shot you a look, and you had to sigh. “fine. yes, it is. don’t ask who, when, where or how, please.”

“so you’re embarrassed.” she’d nodded understandingly.

your cheeks had flared red as you caught sight of james—god, james potter and his magic lips and warm hands and—stop it—over her shoulder, looking back at her before she could realise your attention had strayed. “i’m not embarrassed. it’s just… private.”

“for now or for good?”

“for now,” you’d answered like you knew for sure. in truth, you didn’t. you’d avoided talking about the whole public relationship thing with james because, well, was it even really a relationship now? could you call sneaking around and leaving secret notes and making out in secluded hallways a relationship? you really didn’t know, and you also really didn’t want to deal with it very much.

regardless, lily was obsessed. when she’d inevitably asked, claiming it was her right as your best friend to know and threaten the poor person, you’d shut her down, and she’d become a woman on a mission.

it was like she’d turned from your best friend to your bodyguard. you felt like the president of the united states, with the secret service watching your every move. it was, honestly, tiring.

it also didn’t help that james was as subtle as a gun in an echo chamber. every chance he got he was smiling over at you, slipping you notes half as sneakily as he should, winking at you across rooms and teasing you every chance he got. it wouldn’t take long, you knew that. you also knew that the moment lily found out the truth, every shred of your reputation that you’d built up over the years would crumble away.

years of hating james potter’s guts had slipped away in the blink of an eye, leaving you floundering in the deep end, and him as your dashing lifeguard, saving you easily. it was infuriating, and what was worse, was that you liked it.

you liked his lips on yours. you liked his body pinning you against a wall. you liked his touch, his smile, his voice… you liked him.

maybe you were a little embarrassed after all.

but you couldn’t even think of embarrassment when james slipped you a note with a tiny doodle of professor flitwick falling off his stack of books, and looked at you with that goofy smile that made you want to melt and then kiss him stupid. ugh, it was ridiculous.

but he was addictive, and after class when you met in the same secluded side hallway as always, and his lips found yours like they needed to be there for him to survive, and his hands were on your hips, your waist, your back, your hair… it didn’t feel so ridiculous. and suddenly you didn’t care.

he always melted into you like he’d been waiting all day for your touch. his shoulders dropped, the tension slipping away from them. a soft sigh of relaxation left him as he touched you.

and it was only you and him in the world, and it was perfect and—

“oh my god!”

james jumped away from you like he’d been burned. you covered your mouth with your hand and shook your head frantically, meeting lily’s wide eyes.

“lily, i—“

“ew, guys, really?” you thought she’d be mad that you were kissing a marauder, but she looked positively gleeful. “i knew i’d be the one to find you two!”

you and james both frowned.

“what?” he asked.

“god, marlene owes me ten galleons.” she laughed, shaking her head. “thank you, guys, really. fucking hell.”

you just stared at her with wide eyes. “you’re not upset?”

“upset?” she snorted. “babes, why would i be upset?”

“because…” you floundered for a moment, gesturing at james. “he’s a marauder.”

he snorted. “wow, thanks.”

“you know what i mean,” you scoffed.

lily laughed. “i don’t care who you make out with. i just care that you’re happy. and you’ve been happy these last few weeks since you two got together.”

“months,” you corrected absently.

“months?”

“three months and four days, to be exact,” james cut in helpfully.

lily stared at you two for a moment before shaking her head in wonder and stepping away. “wow… first of all, i’m offended you didn’t tell me. second of all… you guys have got to find a better hiding spot. everyone knows. marlene and i placed bets on who would find you guys making out first.”

you stared at her. “wait, what?”

she turned and walked down the hall. “toodles! i have to go cash in. use protection!”

and just like that, she was gone, leaving you and james standing in the hallway, confused.

“did that…?” you started, trailing off.

“yeah, i think so.” he frowned, leaning against the wall beside him. “huh. so… if everyone knows already…?”

you looked at him curiously. “what are you suggesting, potter?”

“what do you say to me asking you out? officially.” he stepped closer, fingers brushing a piece of hair out of your face.

you couldn’t stop the stupid smile from breaking onto your face. “i say yes.”

“great. that’s awesome. really.” he grinned, lips mere inches from yours. “because i’ve actually been wanting to ask you out for ages, and—“

“would you kiss me again, potter? and stop talking for once?”

“oh, yeah, right.”

and his lips were on yours again, and his hands were holding you close, and unlike every other time you’d kissed, you didn’t feel the need to hide and pull him down an abandoned hallway. actually, you felt completely fine kissing him in the middle of one of the main hallways of the school, even when footsteps entered the hall, and even when sirius black’s voice started loudly complaining at the two of you. even then, all you did was smile against james’ lips, and revel in the moment. you’d be late for your study session with your friends, but you had more important things to do.

[whatstruthgottodowithit]

Faithfully

Fandom: Harry Potter [Marauders Era]

Pairing: James Potter x Female Reader

Characters: James Potter, Female Reader, Harry Potter, Sirius Black

Word Count: 2250

Rating: Teen

Summary: And lovin' a music man ain't always what it's supposed to be.

Tags/ Warnings: Hogwarts, Summer Challenge, Writing Challenge, Song Fic, Band AU, Can be lily if you want, Kissing, Tour, Band Life, Baby Harry potter,

Notes: This is my summer writing challenge 2024. Seven fics over seven days - all will be hp based and song fics.

Summer Challenge 2024 // Song Inspo

‘Do you know when you’ll be home?’ you asked quietly, careful not to wake the baby sleeping soundly on your chest.

‘Dunno,’ James said with a sigh, ‘a day or two? I’m sure we’ve got a gap before our Paris show. Could probably squeeze in a visit.’

‘You don’t have to if it’ll be too much hassle,’ you said, trying to keep your tone light and unbothered. You didn’t want him to have to rush only for him to be home for less than twelve hours but you were missing him.

‘Seeing you two is never too much hassle,’ he said, the smile present in his voice though as you listened down the line you heard the noise of someone coming into the room, a muffled voice, which sounded like Sirius, asking if he was ready or not. You heard him ask for a minute before he put his attention back on you and said, ‘love I have to go.’

‘I know I heard,’ you said, a sigh escaping you before you could stop it.

‘I’ll call after the show I promise,’ he vowed.

‘I know you will,’ you said, ‘you better go. Love you.’

‘Love you more,’ he replied before he hung up leaving you with nothing more than a dial tone. As you placed the receiver down you heard a whimper and looked down to find you baby boy, Harry, looking disgruntled from being jostled about. He’d not opened his eyes though and after a moment of watching him you realised he hadn't woken and so as quietly as you could you climbed out of the chair so you could carry him upstairs to bed.

You put him in his cot as gently as you could, hoping he’d not be able to tell the difference between your touch and the feel of the mattress. Fortunately he continued to sleep leaving you free to leave though you still stood there for a good five minutes so as not to tempt fate. It'd been a nightmare to get him off to sleep tonight though that had been the trend for the last few weeks as the more he missed James the worse his behaviour got. You didn’t blame him. You missed him too. But you knew it was for the best.

You’d been with James since school and you loved him just as much now as you did then. You’d moved in together, gotten married and even had a baby despite being so young. People had told you it was foolish, that you should wait a while, but you didn’t see the point. But now you were starting to wonder if they were right.

Because James was a musician, he and his three friends had formed a band called the marauders at school and had continued to try their hand at it after they’d left in lieu of what your dad would call a ‘proper job’. But they weren’t some kids playing at rockstars. They were good. Phenomenal showman and they'd been signed not long after leaving school. You’d been living the high life. The wife of a rockstar.

Until two little pink lines on a stick had knocked that all of kilter. You loved Harry, more than anything in the world, but he had definitely changed your life. Instead of shows and parties you were now at home with nappies and bottles. You saw James infrequently though he always called whenever he had a chance. It wasn’t even as though you missed staying out till three am or drinking to oblivion. You missed being there, watching your husband give the performance of a lifetime and basking in the high with him. You missed waking up in the same bed, wrapped around one another until you had to drag yourselves to the next venue or tour bus. You missed James being at home with you and Harry, watching how your baby grew into the fabulous little boy he was becoming. You’d only had a few solid months together after he was born before he’d had to leave and though you’d met him for a show here and there or he’d raced home to see you it wasn’t the same.

Quite simply you missed your husband.

You missed him so much that as you climbed into bed, exhausted and sad, you found tears running down your face as you pressed it into his pillow for comfort.

✵✵✵

‘What’s that? Is it a fishy?’ you cooed, moving the toy fish through the water as Harry splashed at it, ‘is it gonna get ya? It’s gonna get ya!’

You moved the fish until it was nestled in his neck making him wobble and giggle as it tickled along his skin.

‘It’s gotcha!’ you laughed as he fumbled to take it off you, his chubby fingers locking around it as he waved it towards your face, ‘is it gonna get mummy?’

You were face to face with him, pressing kisses on his plump cheeks as he clunked your face with the plastic fish, when you heard someone say, ‘well I’d say do you want me to take over but you look as though you’re having far too much fun for me to intervene.’

You whipped around immediately at the voice, finding James stood in the doorway, leaning against it looking bemused. Having not expected him home for another day or so you were stunned but not enough that you couldn’t hurl yourself up off the floor and into his arms which wrapped around you on instinct, the pair of you absorbing every inch of love you could from one another.

‘Hiya,’ he said as you pulled back, his hand on your cheek.

‘Hi,’ you beamed, ‘what you doing home?’

‘Oh charmin,’ he said, rolling his eyes which earned him a swat on the chest. James ignored it, moving to it on the edge of the bath to watch Harry who upon seeing him immediately decided he was done with bath time and offered his arms up to be picked up. You nodded as he looked to you for permission, not knowing where in the process you’d gotten up to, and then he grabbed a towel from the side of the bath and scooped Harry up into his arms.

‘Hiya mate,’ he said, pressing a kiss to his cheek which earned him a sloppy one of his own. You smiled just watching the pair of them, your heart swelling with pride and love which grew as he looked at you with a grin, ‘you two happy to see me then?’

‘Ecstatic, but it’s nearly bedtime,’ you said, sadness tinging your voice. As James stood up from the bath, Harry now on his hip you ran a hand through Harry’s wet hair. It was flat against his head, though you doubted that would last long once it was dry. Back to the unruly mess it was like James. James watched you, an encouraging smile on his face as he said, ‘well then let's get ready for bed.’

You nodded and headed out the bathroom. He followed you, babbling to Harry as you led them through to his nursery where you’d laid everything out. Despite being prepared for bedtime it was a struggle to get him dry and dressed as he refused to be more than three inches from James but eventually you got him bundled into his pyjamas and ready for a bedtime story.

Whilst James took a seat in the chair in Harry’s nursery you nipped downstairs to make up his evening bottle and as you boiled the kettle you tried to will yourself to be happy, to not look at the clock and think about how he’d be gone in however many hours and you two would be on your own again. And in that vein you rushed to get Harry’s bottle ready so that you could make the most of the time together though by the time you got back upstairs James was near the end of his bedtime story.

You perched on the arm of the chair, swapping his book for the bottle which Harry took to immediately, content on watching the pair of you whilst you watched him. James placed a hand on your thigh as you leant down to nestle into him, placing a kiss on the top of his head. Harry was content with staring at you both but the more he drank the heavier his eyes got until he was asleep, the bottle dropping from his grasp before James caught it. When he didn't disturb you realised it was probably safe to transfer him and so moved out of his way so that James could put him in his cot. To your surprise he went down well, so well you wondered if James would even believe you when you told him of the anarchy of bedtimes you’d been living with. But still you waited for a moment, watching him to ensure he was fully settled. James was watching him too, adoration plastered on his face. 

‘Cmon,’ you said, pulling his attention away from the sleeping tot, ‘if we stare at him any longer he might wake up.’

‘Good point,’ he chuckled quietly following you back out to the bathroom. Whilst you drained the bath and sorted Harry’s toys out he washed the used bottle in the sink.

‘So how long have we got?’ you asked, draining water out of a plastic sea creature before tossing it into the small box for bath toys.

‘Before I have to leave for Paris?’ he asked, leaning against the sink as he watched you.

‘Yeah,’ you said, trying not to sound too disheartened.

‘Have to meet the boys at Dover for eleven,’ he said, checking his watch, ‘so about twelve hours.’

‘Great twelve hours and we’ll be sleeping for most of it,’ you said as you threw the last of the toys in the box and pulled the plug. You didn’t look at him, instead watching the swirling water so that he couldn’t see your face but he could sense your disappointment and moved to hug you from behind pulling you into his chest.

‘You sound disappointed,’ he said as he placed his chin on your shoulder, watching you in the mirror.

‘Not with you,’ you said, moving your hand to his cheek and stroking it gently, ‘I just miss you that’s all. We both do.’

‘I miss you both too,’ he said, turning you around to hold you close. He looked tired, the skin beneath his eyes tinged purple which didn’t surprise you. He’d probably gotten to bed well into the morning before a full day in the car to get home. 

‘Well we’ve got twelve hours I suppose,’ you reasoned, ‘if you can stay awake that is. You look shattered.’

‘Actually that’s something I wanted to speak to you about,’ he said.

‘What?’ you asked, confused.

‘Well I was thinking we could spend the night packing for you to come with me tomorrow,’ he said simply.

‘What me and Harry come to Paris?’ you scoffed.

‘Paris, Brussels, Berlin, Cologne-’

‘Babe that’s your entire tour,’ you said, the piece of paper pinned to your fridge with the dates you’d committed to memory flashing to your mind.

‘Yeah,’ he shrugged.

‘You want me to come on tour with you?’ you asked in disbelief.

‘You’ve done it before,’ he shrugged.

‘And Harry?’ you reasoned.

‘Well I don’t think he’s old enough to stay home alone,’ he teased, earning a smack on the chest which made him laugh.

‘We can't come on tour with you!’ you chastised.

‘Why not?’ he asked.

‘He’s a baby!’ you reasoned, ‘he needs routine and home comforts and-‘

‘Two parents who aren’t miserable,’ James said, looking at you pointedly. You shifted under the weight of his gaze but he moved so that you were looking at him by taking a seat on the bath, pulling you in between his legs as his arms locked around you.

‘Babe I know what we said when Harry was born. I know we wanted a normal life for him but our life isn’t exactly normal. It’s never gonna be normal so long as we’re doing this thing,’ he reasoned, ‘and I’m not saying there's not going to have to be adjustments, we're not gonna be able to act like we did before but we’ll still be together. That’s what I want.’

‘Me too,’ you said, ‘but all the travelling and the shows-’

‘He’ll get used to it,’ he vowed, ‘I promise it’s better to have a life that’s a little chaotic but happy rather than one that’s normal and miserable.’

You deliberated that point for a moment. You knew it wasn’t going to be easy. Everyone you’d spoken to when pregnant had told you that the road would be no place for a family but maybe they were wrong. Because they'd been wrong about everything else.

They’d assumed you’d gotten married because you’d gotten knocked up, not that James had been walking around with a ring in his pocket for six months before he’d gotten up the courage to ask. They assumed that you came on tour to keep an eye on him, not because he’d managed to talk you round into attending so many dates it had become easier to just join them for the entire thing rather than think of another excuse to give to your old boss on why you’d not turned in for yet another shift. When people saw you in town, shopping or in the park with Harry they assumed you’d been left behind to raise him whilst James did whatever he wanted. They pictured him bedding fans or hookers instead of running back to his hotel to call you like he did every night, the two of you talking until one of you fell asleep. They assumed that you staying behind had been his choice and not yours.

But maybe James was right.

After all, what use was routine when it was different for half the year. Harry got used to having two parents and then was forced back to having one, his dad a stranger popping in every so often and leaving him more confused than ever. And it wasn’t just James he missed. He missed his uncles, James’ bandmates, all of whom adored him and showered him with love. He also missed you, the person you were around James.

The road wasn’t a place to raise a baby but who said? Maybe you could make it work, at least now whilst he was small.

‘You’re right,’ you agreed, moving to perch on his knee, ‘I am miserable. Harry too.’

‘And me,’ he said, ‘and the boys truth be told.’

‘Yeah?’ you giggled, ‘miss me that much do they?’

‘Of course. You’re mum to more than just Harry, remember,’ he chuckled, ‘and apparently I’m no fun to be around when you’re not about.’

‘That makes two of us,’ you mused.

‘So you’ll come with?’ he asked hopefully, his thumb moving gently along your denim clad thigh.

‘How could we refuse?’ you smiled. James beamed a smile and then leaned into kiss you, his lips capturing yours gently for a moment before he pulled back and rested his forehead against yours, still smiling.

‘I will say one thing though,’ you said.

‘What's that darling?’ he asked.

‘The sex isn’t going to be half as good when we’re seeing each other all the time,’ you said, your mind on those incidents when he’d managed to see you over past few months, the short time span and neediness in the both of you serving as conduit for passion you’d ever experienced before.

‘Hmm you might be right,’ he said, ‘but we’ll just have to keep trying to recreate it then won't we.’

‘Definitely,’ you giggled.

[h2llish]

𓂃 ࣪ ˖ ❀ PRETTY PETALS, DARLING WORDS

❝ darling, i'll be your sunflower, just give me your light ,, ─── 200 follower event!

✉ ─── hello! i decided an event for the growing following of this blog would be nice! so here we are. i thought long and hard about whether or not i should do an event, so i hope you enjoy it! explanation and rules for this event will be below, including how to request.

【 this event takes place from june 21st to august 30th 】 ─── event masterlist

♡ ─── RULES FOR THIS EVENT (please read before requesting!)

♡ the fandoms i write for all apply ─ twisted wonderland, stardew valley, demon slayer, and obey me

♡ as i do for all my writing, i will only write oneshots for this event.

♡ there is no set number of requests i will take, and you are allowed to send in how many requests you want until the end date. but please try to refrain from sending in another ask until i'm finished with your first! it's much easier that way.

♡ please remember i am a writer for only male and gender neutral readers, and it will be written gender neutral lest you ask otherwise.

♡ this is only a reader insert event

♡ you are allowed to ask for platonic requests with the prompts! i will write both romantic and platonic.

♡ if you have any questions please don't hesitate to ask!

♡ you can request for certain add ons in your request like if you want more fluff, or if you want the reader to act a certain way! an example of this can be found with requesting examples.

─── that's all, you may continue reading to understand the event and how it works!

✉ ─── EXPLANATION

allow me to explain this event and how it works! this event has two parts, [pretty petals] and [darling words]. they can be requested separately, or together!

[pretty petals] are flower prompts, choose a flower ─ a prompt ─ and i will write it. some prompts are strictly romantic, but some can be applied platonically, i will specify on the prompt so be sure to tell me if you want it written romantic or platonic!

[darling words] are dialogue prompts, and much like the first event they can be applied romantically or platonically, so try to specify in your request!

─── now moving on to the prompts!

❀ ─── PRETTY PETALS (part one)

❝ you're pretty like a rose ,,

red rose

(romantic) prompt: you liked to think it's easier to love someone in secret ─ or perhaps just loving them quietly was easier. you only wished they'd notice you in the way you've always seen them.

yellow lily

prompt: they've always been a constant in your life, which is why it was so hard when you lost touch with them ─ but now they're back and things are different, and you can only hope you can go back to being as close as you once were. but maybe that's just wishful thinking.

sunflower

prompt: your shop has always been short on staff, you never quite understood why, but you didn't complain. which is why you were surprised when your boss suddenly introduced you to your new coworker. even more so when you recognize them to be a frequent customer.

black dahlia

(romantic) prompt: they'd left some time ago, and along with them, went your feelings you had kept to yourself for as long as you two had known each other. but now you're in front of them again as they hold out a hand and ask you to dance amidst the crowd. you thought you were over them, but oh how wrong you were.

black calla lily

prompt: reincarnation ─ to live again and again, to go through the motions of wanting and needing from the very beginning, it was exhausting. but it was easier when you had them in your life every new breath. it's unfortunate you're only the one who remembers the before.

white camelia

(romantic) prompt: they love you ─ adore you even. but they've always thought you see them as nothing more than a friend. which is why they're confused when they're friends seem to believe otherwise ─ wait what do they mean they're going to play matchmaker?

✿ ─── DARLING WORDS (part two)

❝ and you smile like the sun ,,

✿ "it's okay, you can stay."

✿ (romantic) “i need to tell you something. and i need you to not hate me when i do."

✿ (romantic) “i honestly don’t even know who you could possibly be referring to.”

✿ “why does everybody keep saying that?”

✿ "i forgot how much i missed you."

✿ (romantic) “do you like me?” ♡ “something like that..”

✿ (romantic) “you’re my favorite.” ♡ “favorite what?” ♡ “everything.”

✿ "I don't feel that way about you"

✿ "you can't do that"

✿ "let's try again"

✿ (romantic) “I’m tired. I want to let go.”

✿ (romantic) “I don’t mind loving them from afar if it means I get to keep them in my life.”

✿ "where are we going?"

✿ "you're so dramatic, you know?"

✿ bonus ─ give me your own prompt!

─── a lot of these prompts come from @celestialwrites , @love-me-a-good-prompt , @dumplingsjinson and @novelbear

─── optional: if you request only from this part of the event, you can give me a setting if you want, if not, then it will all be up to me!

✉ ─── REQUEST EXAMPLES

in case you're a little confused here's some examples for requests!

─ i'd like to request red rose with vil from twst

─ can i request romantic "i forgot how much i missed you" with lucifer and male reader

─ yellow lily and "why does everyone keep saying that?" with ace, platonic

want to add a little extra to your request? here's more examples!

─ can i request romantic mammon and yellow lily with a reader who is sarcastic

─ platonic male reader and "it's okay, you can stay", after cater stumbles across reader who is upset

─ red rose and lucifer, but ends in angst

requests are open until august 30th, please don't be shy to request!

do not repost, translate, copy or run my writing through an ai

[saintsenara]

Wait why are you not a fan of Snape and Hermione?? 2 nerds who care a socially awkward amount about the things they care about nerding out together at levels of romance people who can be chill and normal about things can’t comprehend?? It’s not one of my fav ships but I can definitely see it!

I headcanon that Snape picks on Hermione being a muggle raised know it all thirsty to prove and lacking self awareness because he was one himself when he arrived at school and James and Sirius picked on him for it! It’s like that you’re most repulsed by the things you’re self conscious of in yourself thing to me. Or maybe a him trying to live out being the “cool” one in that dynamic thing

But when she’s a grown woman and more self possessed like he became too I feel like that same energy ness has potential for love!

Hermione is famously respectful and compassionate enough towards all beings to be more understanding than say Lily Evans of his prickly tender ego if he had another m word style outburst and such a people pleaser she’d keep coming back for more snark as long as he peppered it with the odd encouraging compliment

And I feel like a Snape in reciprocated love could absolutely veer into inventing beautiful and helpful spells to impress his lover or sending “made me think of u 😘” notes with verses of elaborate obscure poetry territory that would be frankly the level of literary and academic courtship our Herms deserves 😌

Is it cause they’d both be the highly strung worrier one and they both need someone to ground them? Or maybe too pessimistic together and one of them needs to be the cheerful one?

anon, i genuinely love this for you - i'm always thrilled to get people explaining their love for ships in the ol' inbox, especially when they're ships i don't instinctively vibe with, and i have been won round to stranger premises than this by a passionate defence of why two characters should kiss.

where i still think snamione isn't clicking for me, however, is that the way you describe both snape and hermione here doesn't align in any significant way with what i personally think would be interesting to explore about either character in a relationship and have them still feel meaningfully like their canon selves.

[i will say, though - because i always think it's worth reiterating my fandom commitment towards being neither a cop nor a priest - that i literally don't give a shit about either the age gap or the student-teacher dynamic. i know that's an objection to pairings like snarry and snamione which lots of people do express. but i will never be one of them.]

the primary reason that i don't vibe with many of the more... sapiosexual hermione ships [by which i mean not only snamione but tomione] is that they hang on the idea that hermione's intellect expresses itself in a way we never actually see in canon.

or, the idea that snape and hermione are intellectually compatible [and that they would enjoy hanging out being nerdy about stuff] is just... not true.

throughout the seven-book canon, the way that hermione shows herself to be clever is that she displays an excellent memory and an enormous capacity to rote-learn. her intelligence is overwhelmingly demonstrated - both in the classroom and during the trio's year on the run - by her being able to regurgitate swathes of information, very usually verbatim from the source she got it from.

she is clearly able to use this ability to retain information to understand the theoretical component of magic in a way neither harry nor ron ever manage, and she is able to use this understanding of theory to work out how to perform spells which are ahead of her expected level on the hogwarts curriculum.

and this is intelligence - and i want to be very clear that i'm not trying to suggest that hermione shouldn't be thought of as intellectual, or that her academic achievements should be devalued. but it isn't the way snape's intelligence manifests itself.

because hermione is never shown - at any point in canon - to be a particularly creative or experimental thinker.

she places an enormous intellectual trust in disciplinary authority - teachers and textbooks - and is frequently rattled when these are revealed to be partial or incorrect, as we see in her shock at hogwarts: a history not mentioning house elves or her anger at harry getting better results by following the modified instructions in the prince's textbook [despite knowing nothing about the theory underpinning them] than she does with the "official" ones.

she also regards the gatekeeping of inquiry which disciplinary boundaries enforce to be a positive thing and she never displays any inclination to step beyond them. she dislikes the spells in the prince's textbook because they aren't ministry-approved - and i must say that i think the idea that she'd be won over by a man creating spells for her is wishful thinking...

she is immediately mistrustful of anything she can't find something she regards as an empirical source for - notice, for example, that she only comes round to the idea that prophecies might be real once she encounters them in the ministry of magic.

even when we see her using magic on her own terms - the jinx she uses on marietta edgecombe, for example; or the protean charm on the da coins - the magic she's using is sophisticated, and is being applied in a way which wouldn't be classroom-sanctioned, but it's not magic which is being used in a way which is removed from the spell's original purpose. the protean charm on the da coins is impressive because it's a flawless execution of newt-level magic by a sixteen-year-old. it's not impressive because hermione is using it in a strange, experimental, or radical way.

[in contrast, the dark mark - which harry notes the coins mimic - is clearly a spell voldemort himself invents.]

snape, on the other hand, is an experimenter. he's someone who clearly sees magic as a creative force which he has every right to shape as he sees fit by adaptation and invention. and he's someone who evidently rejects the logic of disciplinary gatekeeping - one tension in his relationship with dumbledore prior to half-blood prince is that snape evidently retains an enormous intellectual interest in the dark arts [which, as he tells us, are an area of magic which is feared precisely because they can't be neatly contained within disciplinary boxes - they are ever-changing, unfixed, mutating...]

and it's these conflicting views of what magic is and how it should be used and thought about which is the cause of the intellectual incompatibility we see between snape and hermione in canon.

he is unequivocally in the wrong for his dismissive classroom manner towards her - because he is an adult and she is a child. but he isn't wrong in principle that hermione just repeating what she's read in the textbook and refusing to synthesise her knowledge [she always goes massively over word limits! she never gives answers in class in her own words!] isn't actually a demonstration that she understands the material. [and therefore something a good teacher would guide her through conquering... snape having no interest in doing this is his own fault.]

and - from a snamione-specific perspective - it's all the evidence snape needs that, actually, they're not going to enjoy hanging out chatting about academic pursuits. hermione values knowledge like a dragon hoards treasure. snape wants to take that treasure, melt it down, and turn it into new and weird things.

once again, i don't think this a flaw in either of their characters - it's just something which is. and i don't think it's an insurmountable obstacle to writing snamione, because i believe any ship is possible if an author has enough nerve. but it's an aspect of both characters' canon personalities [and hermione's above all] which never seems to make it into snamione fics - all of which, as far as i've encountered them, are beholden to an idea of hermione's approach to academia which is considerably more flexible than we actually see in the books.

of your other points, i'm not particularly convinced by the idea that snape sees his younger self in the teenage hermione. this isn't just for the reasons outlined above - hermione isn't trying to prove herself in the same way he was, which was by creating and experimenting in a bid to be noticed and considered impressive - but also because of the massive gulf in their respective class backgrounds.

hermione is really posh - and, while she's obviously subjected to discrimination at hogwarts on account of her blood-status, she also comes from a family with both the financial resources and the cultural language to make her familiar with the vibe of the elite muggle boarding schools hogwarts is a pastiche of.

the teen snape - in contrast - stands out from his cohort in that he is visually identifiable as working-class [which does appear to be genuinely unusual at hogwarts]. his class background is something which clearly drove a lot of the marauders' bullying of him [i'm sorry to the girlies who think james and sirius targeted him out of some righteous desire to stamp out his prejudice - it was because he was poor and uncouth] and which he still has a chip on his shoulder about as an adult.

this - again - is not an insurmountable barrier to a snamione relationship [as it's not a barrier to thousands of real-world partnerships and friendships]. but it is something an author needs to grapple with if they want to make the pairing - at least, in my opinion - seem plausible. but the standard vibe seems to be that snape would be comfortable in the grangers' home fairly quickly, and that he'd be delighted to have hermione swanning around offering suggestions for how they could do up spinner's end... instead of him resenting this as the unwelcome meddling of people who've never had to worry for money.

i'm also not particularly convinced by the idea that hermione would get over being called a mudblood - especially by an adult man. while i think it's completely plausible that she'd handle this differently than lily [although lily's reaction is entirely justified - and i don't think we should throw the baby out with the bathwater of contextualising the teenage snape and the motivating factors behind his decisions by pretending that cutting off your friend because he called you a slur is a petty, ill-thought-out, or unreasonable move], i don't think that her reaction would be automatically forgiving.

hermione is compassionate towards kreacher when he calls her a mudblood because kreacher is a slave, whose prejudicial views are inextricably bound up in the magic used to oppress him [i.e. that if he received an order to use the term, or to refuse to serve a muggleborn food, from his masters, he would have to punish himself violently if he disobeyed it]. she is not - quite rightly! - compassionate towards someone like draco malfoy when he calls her one, since he is a free person with full agency to choose not to do this.

could she forgive him - or snape - for using the term? sure! absolutely! but i don't think it's a given - and i also think she'd expect a demonstration of how sorry snape was which wouldn't necessarily align with how he'd think he'd demonstrated his regret.

i do agree that - as you say - hermione is a people-pleaser, and she definitely has a far greater tolerance for being treated cruelly by people she wants to impress [especially authority figures - including snape himself] than either harry or ron. and i think this has the potential to introduce an extremely thorny dynamic into a snamione fic - in which the power dynamic inherent in the age gap [which, to reiterate, i think is completely fine for an author to enjoy] is compounded by hermione being unwilling to anger or contradict snape [which is a vibe - as i've said in answer to an ask about harmony - we also see in her relationship with harry... it's also obviously exactly how snape's relationship with dumbledore works.]

on a couple of the more minor characterisation notes, i'm afraid that the idea of snape as a great romantic has never hit for me. it seems really bound up in the way alan rickman portrayed him in the films, which i've always found a bit toothless. i also don't like the trope of "actually snape's really hot" which seems to always accompany it - ugly, odd men to get to bone too!

[what he would be - i think - is a magpie. get ready to be handed odd stones and bits of leaves on dates.]

i also think they're highly-strung in ways which differ enough to mean they'd just annoy each other. hermione is highly-strung in that she flusters easily and is very poor under pressure, but she's actually pretty emotionally stable [and i'd dispute that she's a pessimist - this is a girl who thinks that she's successfully eradicating slavery at hogwarts by knitting hats; she's pretty robust, funny, cheerful, and idealistic]. snape is highly-strung in that he has a hair-trigger temper and is very emotionally volatile, but he's obviously an extraordinarily good liar, very quick on his feet, and very good under pressure. he'd think she panicked too much [and over insignificant things he didn't care about], she'd think he tanked the vibe of a date by taking offence at someone breathing too loudly.

where are they similar? well, they have a shared self-serving streak [hermione is appalled by behaviour from harry and ron she considers perfectly moral when she does it]; capacity for cruelty; tendency towards secrecy; tendency towards pettiness and pleasure in the misfortune of others; loathing of flying a broom; cutting sense of humour; stubbornness; resilience; clear dislike of slumming it in nature; love of puzzles; and a weakness for red hair.

i think you could make it work on the grounds that they'd probably have the time of their lives being haters together - especially, i feel, about rita skeeter.

and - y'know - because love is weird.

[starofthesea37]

Marauders x Batfamily Crossover

So I really want to write a marauders x bats crossover, but I am uncharacteristically lost on the mechanics of it. You see, I love coming up with random au’s for my fandoms, and I have SO MANY IDEAS about interactions between marauders era characters and the bats (specifically around sibling dynamics), and many many ideas for random plot points and scenes, but what I can’t figure out is why they end up in this situation in the first place.

The general idea is that the bats go undercover at Hogwarts during the marauders era to gather information and help with the war against Voldemort. I’m not sure WHICH of the bats it would be, and what their roles in this endeavour would be (is it Tim, Steph & Damian who go, as they’re the only ones in the age range? Or is there some sort of age reversal spell involved that allows them all to attend? Or maybe the older bats are involved, but from the outside, as members of the Order of the Phoenix or Deatheaters or Ministry workers etc., or is it Young Justice who go?), but that is something I can figure out later depending on the mechanics of how it comes about.

What I need to know first is why it’s happening. Whereas in Golden Trio era crossovers the timeline can easily be adjusted to match up, for this crossover it’s very important that the Marauders era is in the 70s, and the bats would have to be from the 2010s+ in order to realistically have the technology they do. Therefore there has to be some sort of time or dimension travel involved. Meaning that this mission has to be entirely purposeful and planned. They have to have a reason to go back in time or travel to another dimension to help with the wizard of war (which also happens to be in England, very far from Gotham and the bats territory).

I have plans for how they get magic, how they get into the school etc., but this part is what’s really bugging me. I need my AU’s to make logical sense, otherwise I drop them.

I’d also like to mention that there are literally no fics with this crossover on ao3, and therefore I, as someone who has been deeply immersed in both these fandoms for a while, feel a moral obligation to fill this tragic gap. There’s just far too much potential for character interactions and awesome plot points to pass up the opportunity.

Also I’d like to put what ships/headcanons I may be including/referencing in this, just as a disclaimer in case anyone feels strongly against them. Just because they’re on this list doesn't necessarily mean they will definitely be included, but this is just what I fuck with and will include if it works for the plot.

•Romantic Ships (Marauders): Jegulus, Wolfstar, Pandalily, Dorlene, Rosekiller.

•Romantic Ships (Bats): TimKon (possibly Timberkon), Birdflash.

•I can maybe be convinced to include others so long as they’re not incest, age gap or anything else horrifying and illegal.

•Platonic Ships/Dynamics (Marauders): Marauders (James, Peter, Sirius, Remus)(obviously), Valkyries (Lily, Mary, Marlene), Skittles (Regulus, Barty, Evan, Dorcas, Pandora), Black Brothers (Regulus & Sirius), Prongsfoot (James & Sirius), Moonwater (Regulus & Remus), Moonflower (Remus & Lily), Marlene, James & Peter as childhood besties.

•Platonic Ships/Dynamics (Bats): all the bats to varying degrees obviously, but specifically, Jason & Tim, Tim & Steph, Tim & Damian, Dick & Damian, Damian & Jason.

I’ve almost definitely forgotten some but you get the general picture. Hopefully.

I have an entire google doc dedicated to what houses I think each of the bats would be in, but my opinion on that changes literally daily. They’re confusing your honour. But mainly I think it would just be hilarious to put Jason Todd in a dorm with the marauders and watch them flounder. Oh and stick Tim in Regulus’ dorm. He’d be such a menace. And Steph in the Valkyries dorm. Someone stop me before I cause too much chaos 😭

Anyway! This crossover has been living rent free in my mind for so long and I would appreciate any and all feedback/thoughts/opinions/ideas!!!!

I’ll probably add more onto this at some point, but this is the general gist. Pleaseeeeee gimme ideas!!!

Oh also fuck jkr :)

[pulisicsgirl]

dad to the rescue - christian pulisic

summary: when Y/N and Christian's daughter is frightened of the doctor, Christian comes to the rescue to calm her fears

pairing: Christian Pulisic x reader

word count: 2.0k

warnings/tags: descriptions of a doctor's office, needles/injections, anxiety, lots and lots of fluff

requested: no

notes: Hey y'all! I've been feeling pretty uninspired recently, but I have more time to right now that school is out. So I decided to rewrite this old fic that I wrote several years ago for another fandom to try to get the creativity flowing! So if you read a fic similar to this for someone else years ago, no you didn't. It's definitely not my favorite thing that I've written, but hopefully, it'll get the ball rolling!

“Mommy, I don’t like the doctor. It’s scary,” Lily whimpered as you helped her climb out of her car seat and onto the pavement.

You glanced nervously over at Christian, pleading silently for his help. You were naturally a nervous person—a trait that was dialed up to 11 when it came to your daughter. You were just as terrified, if not more so, than your daughter for this visit. Knowing that she was scheduled to receive an injection, you had convinced Christian to take the day to leave training early and accompany the two of you to the appointment—he always knew how to help in these situations.

“It’s gonna be okay, sweetheart. You’ve got Mommy and Daddy here with you, and…” He trailed off, squatting down so that he was on her level, and he loudly whispered, “I hear they have toys in the waiting room!”

Lily’s face brightened instantly at his words. “D’you want to go find out?” he asked her excitedly, and Lily nodded her head quickly. Christian sprung to his feet, and the two of them raced to the door, hand-in-hand, squealing giddily as I watched them with a huge smile spreading across my face.

Christian pulled open one of the doors, letting Layla speed through and waiting behind to hold it open for me to walk through. He gestured for you to pass, muttering a short, “m’lady,” as you walked through, causing you to giggle and roll your eyes at him.

Lily was inside, trying her hardest to pull open the second set of doors, but it was too heavy for her small self. You reached forward, pulling lightly on the door, and she gasped, thinking she had finally gotten the door to budge on her own, before racing through and straight into the waiting room.

Christian followed in behind you, placing a gentle hand on your lower back. You spun around, pulling him toward you with a firm grip on his shirt and planted a long, firm kiss on his lips. When you pulled away, he had a massive grin on his face.

“What was that for?” he asked, still smirking down at you.

“No reason in particular,” you shrugged, holding back a grin of your own.

“Well, whatever I did, I should do it more often,” he leaned down, pecking your lips once again.

You swatted his chest, gently pushing him away. “You have a daughter in there that has been promised toys and playtime, so you better join her. I’ll sign her in,” you said, pointing to the door of the waiting room.

“Yes ma’am,” he retorted with a short salute, and you punched his shoulder. “Okay, okay, I’m going!” He grinned from ear to ear as he quickly joined Lily in the waiting room.

You turned around, heading to the front desk to sign in and receiving a clipboard with paperwork to fill out.

You sat in the waiting room, occupying your time by filling out the papers and occasionally glancing up to watch your husband and daughter playing enthusiastically with the toy cars. You couldn't help but smile as Christian made motor noises and loud honking sounds with his mouth as he wheeled the cars across the playmat toward Lily.

Before long, a nurse came to the door, sweetly calling out, “Lilian Pulisic?” even though the three of you were the only ones there.

“That’s us!” Christian smiled, standing from the floor and taking Lily’s hand, sensing that her nerves had quickly returned with the appearance of the nurse. As he led her over to the nurse, the fear was back on her face as she clung tightly to his arm, but she seemed to be slightly more confident as she walked with him.

The nurse weighed her and measured her height. Lily jumped up and down when the nurse told her that she’d grown 3 inches in the last year. After taking a few more measurements, the nurse led your little family into a small exam room and let you know that the doctor would be there soon.

You and Christian sat down in the chairs as you watched Lily wander the room, pointing out the various animals painted along the walls of the room. You pulled Christian’s hand into your lap, intertwining your fingers with his and gripping it tightly. Your worry for your daughter had quickly returned as you sat down in the hard, plastic chairs, and Christian sensed this, beginning to run his thumb over the back of your hand in an effort to soothe you.

A few minutes later, a young female doctor walked in, stethoscope hanging around her neck and computer in hand. Christian lifted Lily to sit on the exam table before settling back into his seat next to you.

“Hello there! You must be Lilian!” the doctor greeted warmly. “Do you go by Lilian?”

Lily remained silent, glancing nervously over at you with wide eyes.

“Go on, it’s okay,” Christian encouraged her softly.

She looked back at the doctor, replying with a quiet, “My name’s Lily.”

“Oh wow! Your name is so beautiful!” the doctor said excitedly, and a small smile appeared on Lily’s face. “Well, my name is Dr. Jones, but you can call me Anna.” Lily giggled and you could tell that she was already warming up to the doctor.

The appointment continued normally and Lily grew confident enough to answer most of the questions on her own, which caused your heart to swell with pride. Anna only turned to you and Christian to get more precise answers about Lily’s eating and sleeping habits.

Anna listened to her heart, took her blood pressure, and checked over every part of Lily’s body, from her head to her toes. Lily laughed especially hard when Anna looked in her ears (she told you between giggles that it tickles) and when she used the mallet on Lily’s leg to check her reflexes.

“Alright, we’ve just got one more thing to do and then you can go home!” Anna said as the appointment seemed to be coming to its end. “I see we’re scheduled for a vaccine today?” she asked, glancing at you and Christian for confirmation.

“Alright, so what we’re gonna do, is we’re gonna give you a little shot right here,” she explained, drawing a small circle on Lily’s left arm. “I know that sounds really scary, but it’ll feel like a little pinch, and then it’ll be over, okay?” Lily seemed a little uncertain, but otherwise fine. Anna left, but not before explaining that the nurse from before would be back in shortly and giving Lily a high five on her way out the door.

Just moments later, the nurse returned, carrying a tray with some alcohol swabs and a needle on it. The moment Lily laid eyes on the tray, she began to panic.

“Mommy, I don’t want a shot,” she cried, the tears quickly welling up in her eyes and spilling down her cheeks. You jumped up from your chair as she reached out for you, rushing to her side and hugging her tightly as she cried.

It hurt you to see her this scared. You swallowed the lump in your throat, doing your best to speak softly and calmly to her. “Shh, baby, it’s okay. You heard Dr. Jones! It’s just a small pinch and then it’s over. You can do this!”

Your words seemed to do nothing to calm Lily nerves, and she whimpered, pulling you closer by the fabric of your shirt.

You felt Christian’s hand on your back, telling you that he was standing just behind you. He placed a quick kiss on your cheek, whispering in your ear, “Here, let me.”

You stepped back, watching as Christian sat on the table next to Lily, holding your shaking daughter as she clung tightly to him. He shrugged the jacket he was wearing from his shoulders, pulling the short sleeve of his T-shirt up and over his left shoulder.

“Hey, look here,” he spoke soothingly to Lily, holding out his tattooed arm for her to look at. She slowly looked away from the nurse, who was preparing for the shot. “Tell me all of the things you see on my arm.”

Lily sniffled, wiping her nose on her sleeve, but her crying seemed to be slowing down now. She ran her small hand along his arm, trying to find something.

“There’s a tiger,” she spoke slowly. Christian turned his arm so that she could see the face of the tiger more clearly.

“Very good!” Christian exclaimed, and a small smile appeared on Lily’s face. “Now try to find something else.” He glanced at you as she continued looking, shooting you a quick smile before returning his attention back to his little girl.

Lily jumped as the nurse wiped her arm with the cold alcohol swab, her focus leaving Christian’s arm as the fear in her eyes returned.

“It’s okay. She’s just cleaning your arm,” Christian explained sweetly. “Keep looking.”

“S-some letters,” she stuttered, pointing at Christian’s wrist. He nodded with a short “mhm.” Her fingers trailed up to Christian’s shoulder. “A bird.” She brushed her fingers across his skin, down the inside of his arm. “And that’s Mike.” A short giggle fell from her lips as she reached the tattoo of the one-eyed, green monster from Monsters Inc., a movie that she had watched many times with her father.

Christian noticed the nurse uncapping the needle, and he moved to point out something else so Lily would remain distracted. He flipped his arm over, pointing to the chess piece on his forearm. “And this here is a chess piece. It’s called the queen.” Lily tapped the inked game piece with her fingers, clueless to the movements of the nurse next to her.

As the nurse put the needle in her arm, Lily whimpered quietly. She gripped Christian’s arm tightly in her small fingers, clamping her eyes shut as she let out a small cry.

But the shot was over as quickly as it had started.

“It’s over,” Christian spoke to her, kissing the top of her head while she still held tightly to his arm. Lily looked up at his face, and Christian's heart tightened a little as he wiped the tear streaks away with his thumb. “You’re okay, sweetie. We’re all done.”

The nurse put a bandage on Lily’s shoulder as Christian slipped his arms back into his jacket.

Soon enough, we were dismissed from the room, and Lily reached out for Christian to pick her up. She lifted her arms into the air toward him, wiggling her fingers with droopy eyes—clearly exhausted from the whole ordeal. She was barely awake enough in his arms to pick out a sticker before dropping her head onto his shoulder as you signed her out.

The three of you walked out the front doors of the office and to the car. Christian carefully shuffled the small girl out of his arms and into her car seat as you held the door open. Lily had managed to fall fast asleep in the time it took to reach the car.

You closed the door gently, attempting to keep from waking her up. You softly pushed Christian into the side of the car, resting your hands on both of his cheeks as you planted a firm kiss to his lips.

When you pulled back, Christian had a confused but pleased grin on his face.

“You’re incredible. You know that?” you asked as you felt his arms snake around your waist, pulling you further into his body.

“You really think so?”

You nodded in response. “You have such a way with her. I would’ve absolutely been freaking out along with her.”

He quickly kissed you again, a mischievous smile on his lips. “You know,” he started slowly, his smile only growing as he spoke. “We could always have another one.”

“Now you’re getting ahead of yourself, Pulisic,” you laughed, pulling away from him and beginning to walk around the car to get in on the passenger side. He reached to try to slap your butt as you walked away, but you jumped out of the way, dodging his hand and causing both of you to giggle as you ran around the car.

You heard him call from the other side of the vehicle. “You didn’t say no!”

tag list: @masonspulisic @chelseagirl98 @thoseboysinblue @lovelynikol16 @swimmingismywholelife @masonsrem @bracedes @neverinadream @notsoattractivearenti

[phoenixs-fandoms-and-writings]

Being Around You Makes Me Feel Better

Fandom: Harry Potter - Marauders Era

Pairing: James Potter/Reader

Character: James Potter

Summary: You have a bad day, where you hate yourself and the way you look. You sneak into James’ bed in his dorm and thats where he finds you and spends time trying to make you feel a bit better or at the very least forget for now.

Reader is autistic and so am I.

Notes: I don’t own Harry Potter or its characters. I also don’t believe JKR’s beliefs. This account is safe place for all.

I do not give permission to anyone to repost or translate any of my stories. I also do not give anyone permission to feed my stories through AI or to be posted to any third party website or app. If anyone sees any of my work posted anywhere but here or my AO3 (simplyreflected), then it has been posted without permission.

Posted on AO3 here.

You couldn’t help it. When everyone left for classes, you crept into the Marauders dorm and climbed into James’ bed. You stayed there all day. You felt safe surrounded by his scent and his things. You knew that he could always make you feel better, but you pulled the blankets up to your neck. That's where you stayed as you cried yourself to sleep.

You woke to the sound of the door opening and someone gasping. You didn’t care who it was, if they spoke to you, you’d just ask for James. You only wanted your best friend.

You didn’t hear the sounds of anyone approaching, but when you see them crouch down and see James himself in front of you, you whisper, “Jamie, you’re here.”

“Hey love,” he whispers back in response. He waves his wand and a glass of water appears in his hand. He hands it to you, and you drink it, before he waves it away as he looks at you sadly, “What’s wrong?”

“Jamie, I hate myself. I need you. Being around you makes me feel better.”

He smiled at you softly before he asked, “can I climb in with you?”

You hum in response as you open the blankets for him. You let go of them as he takes off his shoes and then climbs in next to you. He wraps the blanket around both of you, before he wraps his arms around you.

“Why do you hate yourself, love?”

“I feel fat. I look ugly. I can’t stand looking in the mirror. I don’t think anyone but you really likes me.”

“I need you to look at me, lovey,” James told you kindly, which made it hard to resist, you looked up at his beautiful and kind blue eyes. “Do you trust me?”

“Yes,” you didn’t lie about that. He was the only person you knew you could trust to tell you the truth, even on days like today, when you didn’t even trust yourself.

“Then trust me when I say this,” he tells you honestly as you look at different parts of his face; seeing his beauty, since looking in people’s eyes for too long would become uncomfortable. He didn’t mind and you knew that, as long as you listened. “You are the most beautiful person I know; inside and out. You may not believe it, but I’ll prove it and show you everyday, because I wish I could date someone like you.” He paused as you stopped looking at him and cuddled into him. “No, not someone like you. I wish I could have the courage when you’re not having a day like this, but I want to date you.”

“What about Lily?”, you whispered back.

“What about he-,” he cut himself off, before slowly saying, “I haven’t been flirting with her.” He kissed the top of your head. “I was flirting with you, but when they first asked me, I was embarrassed to say I was flirting with you. You were right there. I was worried you’d reject me and we’d go from being best friends to being awkward around each other to being people the other used to know.

“Jamie,” you knew he could hear the catch in your throat and that he’d probably realise you’d been crying, but they were no longer sad tears. “I’ve loved you since second year.”

He paused. “Really?”

You smiled and nodded, “yeah.” You paused cuddling into his warmth and yawned, lifting one of your hands to cover your mouth.

You listened as he told you, “I’ll spend the rest of my life showing and telling you how much I love you.”

You yawned again and he kissed the top of your head again, and rubbed your back as you whispered, “I love you, James.”

As you fell asleep, you could’ve sworn he whispered, “I love you too, angel.”

———————————

LATER THAT DAY

———————————

You woke up later that day still in James’ arms, with him holding you really close to him. One of his arms was rubbing your back gently and the other holding you as he leaned down to kiss the top of your head.

You hummed contentedly and James whispered, “Love, are you awake?”

You hummed again before yawning and then answered, “yeah, Jamie. Just woke up.”

“I have something I want to officially ask you,” he asked as you moved up slightly so the two of you were face to face.

You lifted your hand up to his cheek, he sighed and closed his eyes, “what is it?”

He opened his eyes, kissed your palm before asking, “I love you and from what you said before, you love me.” He paused and you nodded before he finally asked, “will you go out with me?”

Slowly you started smiling as you moved your hand down to his waist, hugging him, before you answered, “yes, I’d love to.”

You moved closer to him and pecked his lips.

“Do you feel any better now, my love?”

You looked at him as he cupped your cheek, closing your eyes and enjoying his touch. “Whenever you're around, I always feel better. I’m not back to 100% but you make me feel safe and you’ve always found a way to silence the voices. However, unlike today, it's usually your antics or the pranks that help to silence them enough that I stop paying attention to them as much.”

He smiled, before he moved closer, kissing you, with so much love and affection that you melted against him, before he pulled back.

“Are you hungry?”

You think for a moment before your stomach rumbles, answering for you.

He smiled before he kissed you. When he pulled back, he looked in your eyes, “I’ll go get us some food, my love. Is there anything specific that you’d like?”

You told him what you felt like eating and he smiled, before he said, “I’ll be back soon. Wait here?”

“Where else would I want to be?”

He gave you a peck on the cheek before he left, which made you blush. When he came back, he sat next to you before calling one of the house elves, who appeared with trays of food which slowly levitated over to the bed.

Both of you thanked the house elf before they disappeared.

He smiled at you before he leaned over to give you a quick kiss. The two of you ate and just spent the rest of the evening together.

Even when the rest of the guys came in, he just held you close as he talked to them. You joined in the conversation at times, and they were just as happy as always to see you.

That was one thing you loved about his friends; even before you became friends with them, they always included you when you were with James. All of them made you feel welcomed. With that thought, you turned and kissed James’ cheek and snuggled more into his side.

[shuttershocky]

Based on my (limited) experiences following the Type Moon fandom, it seems like there's such a wall between the fans of the "OG stuff" (mostly Mahoyo, Tsukihime, Kara no Kyoukai, FSN) and people who started with/also enjoy Grand Order, it looks like such a one sided thing where the fans of the older stuff tend to hate on FGO's writing and whatever it might have done to have done to Type Moon and Nasu's priorities, while the FGO fans just seem to enjoy the story while still being happy enough to support the OG stuff (Mahoyo/TsukiRe english release for example)

That incoherent wall of text is basically set up for me to ask what *you* think of FGO as someone who I imagine came from the older works. I'm curious about how you feel about the writing and stories in particular, from the arcs where Nasu started to be more involved (I haven't played them, but I believe it's Camelot?) since that's where I heard they started to get more elaborate. Do they live up to the experiences you've had with TM's other works?

Sorry for the long question, and I hope you have a great day!

Wow. I've been here for an incredibly long time if people no longer know about how much I used to play FGO.

Anyway, I would say what really sets FGO apart, not just from the rest of Type-Moon but even from other Fate works, is its scale, both in terms of the storytelling and its real life commercial value.

The hate you see many non-FGO playing TM fans have toward FGO is resentment towards how much it has simply taken up Type-Moon as a whole. The Tsukihime Remake was announced all the way back in 2008 and released in 2021 for example, partly because FGO taking off the way it did in 2015 meant it took up all their time and effort. They could not focus on anything else.

As their biggest moneymaker, it also began to warp the production of other works around it, as FGO had now become the main way by which people got into Type-Moon. Therefore, all things had to appeal to FGO fans in order to sell whether that was Fate/Extella Link pulling in FGO cast members like Scathach and Arjuna into the game, or Fate/Apocrypha's anime adaptation including as many FGO cameos as possible like Medea Lily (what was she even doing there lmao).

Of course, just adding FGO references doesn't automatically make something bad. Fate/Samurai Remnant for example has made fantastic use of FGO characters while mixing them in with new ones. However, you also get stuff like Melty Blood Type-Lumina having Saber, Ushiwakamaru, Dantes, and Mash all in the game while old fan favorite Melty Blood characters like Sion and Len are nowhere to be seen. You know that "Wi-fi is okay if you're close to the router" Melty Blood meme? That character Nanaya Shiki isn't even playable in the latest Melty Blood. When you see that and see not one, not two, but THREE FGO characters taking their place (Saber's a free pass), you'd see why there's a lot of resentment built up towards FGO by older Type-Moon fans.

As I said before, the difference isn't just in its commercial scale, but also in its creative one. Even in the most outlandish of settings, Type-Moon works are almost always smaller scale, character-centric pieces. Fate/Extra took place inside a supercomputer on the Moon, but it was about a glitch making an AI fight in a death battle between humans, and how that formerly blank AI feeling danger and wanting to live blurred the lines between what is human and what isn't. Tsuki No Sango (Coral of the Moon) was about a world 3000 years in the future, but the entire thing was a little space man in the palm of a girl's hand, listening to a love story about a man and a computer on the Moon.

For all its many similarities to previous TM works, FGO is still ultimately a save the world type of story. It starts with a demon destroying all of time, and then turns into a death game between entire timelines. It's big, it's bombastic, and it's instantly accessible, the kind of story structure you want to be able to fit the gacha format of an endless stream of new characters while keeping the ship steady with an overarching plot that lets you keep meeting an endless stream of new characters.

That's not really what I'm a TM fan for. I played FGO for its first 3 years, and once they brought out the Lostbelts I realized I was already satisfied and did not want to read yet another big world saving adventure plot all over again. I was pretty happy with how the first arc ended already, so my interest in continuing FGO shriveled up soon after.

Quality wise I'd say FGO is a very mixed bag, inevitable when FGO itself is a mix of very different writers (who themselves can be pretty inconsistent, Nasu included). Plenty of FGO chapters have also been cursed with subpar adaptations (looking at you, Camelot and Babylonia), further muddying the perceived quality of the stories.

I will say when FGO is bad, it's really bad (and often pretty racist), but when it's good, it's really good. For what I consider to be a mediocre baseline, FGO has some incredibly high peaks that rival the best in Type-Moon, and even when something is just okay execution wise (like Shimousa), some of the characters, concepts, and story beats are just so damn cool that they become intensely emotional and impactive all the same and inspire superior adaptations and follow up works (like Shimousa).

That being said, my favorite stories in FGO were the ones that would use much smaller scale, isolated adventures with a far stronger focus on characterization and emotional arcs that follow its thematic ones. Aeaean Spring Breeze is one of the best examples, being a tiny event about helping Circe move on from having been rejected by Odysseus in life, with some incredibly solid character work and a great understanding of how to mix the needs of a light-hearted comedy event with making genuine, emotionally compelling moments from a character that almost never speaks from the heart.

[conangray-marauders-fest]

Reveals Day 4

Happy Reveals Day 4!

As a reminder, please keep in mind that a lot of Conan's material (and the Marauders Fandom) can be angsty, so please mind all ratings and tags!

Alone Again - by lin reads books (alien_with_headphones)

Remus Lupin was in fourth year when he first felt his heart squeeze because of Sirius Black.

And Sirius Black was way too young when Remus Lupin had to watch him slip away from his life.

Inspired by Conan Gray's Alley Rose.

not like the novels - by my_castlescrumbling

Regulus Black is not the main character, and he has to stop pretending otherwise.

He just hopes that James Potter knows he tried.

this could be a disaster - by starless_gaze

“I don’t think this was the best idea…”

“Oh, that’s okay. We can just-”

“No, wait! I worded it wrong. I- okay. I don’t think it was the best idea to do it like this. I just- I’ve been wanting to kiss you for so long, way longer than I care to admit, really. The truth is-,” you got this, Lily. No backing out now.

or

Lily and Narcissa have been best friends for years but Lily's been secretly in love with her... could it be that Narcissa feels the same?

The exit - by Starwolfandmarauders

"I can't hate you for getting everything we wanted, i just thought that i would be part of it. I was moving into your apartment. When you met someone, he's from your hometown. I hate the east coast; it's where you live now. Impossible to understand how you're not coming back but I can't say it out loud. You love him. It's over. Do you even doubt it on your lips? You love him. It's over. You already found someone to miss while I'm still standing at the exit."

And "Feels like we had matching wounds but mine's still black and bruised when yours is perfectly fine"

But it's Regulus Black to Sirius Black

ART: Best Friend - by Katie_BlackCat

Platonic Bartylus is my favourite! For the Conan Gray Fest - Best Friends.

Please feel free to reblog, comment, kudos, and otherwise encourage the participants! They worked so hard!

[loserboyfriendrjl]

since people are asking for them, here are my unpopular marauders opinions

(note, and i mean this in the most serious way: please, for the love of god, if you don't agree, just scroll. there is no reason to cause drama over some unpopular opinions of some random tumblr user just because you don't agree with me.)

remus is my least favorite character. don't get me wrong, i love him to bits, he's just the least intriguing to me. he's the character we've been given most of; not only that, i find sirius and james' character, as well as peter's (and his betrayal), as far more interesting

i don't really like jegulus for the same reason as remus; the dynamic is interesting, there is a lot to work with there, including the death eater and order member dynamic, but i just find some ships as more interesting

most of the characters are written as super one-dimensional and therefore i do not like most fandom characterizations which is a crucial point, to me, in whether i read the fic. i like fics in which the characters are written as real people, with human emotions and flaws, and not some qualities thrown together

some wolfstar shippers are pretty much the most annoying people in fandom (coming from a wolfstar shipper). shipping the only consistent ship in this fandom does not make you inherently better than everyone else, and just because someone else splits wolfstar for other ships dynamics does not mean anything

the black sisters and the evans sisters, if written well, can be more interesting than the black brothers and i don't think we talk enough about them (i also find the black brothers are really interesting, and i need more fics in which the intensity of these dynamics are explored)

i dislike the main characterization of regulus in fandom, being a huge fan of morally grey regulus. however, each with their own characterization, and i'm no one to judge next. i find him to be a very interesting character, however, and i like fics that dive deeper into his character

people who ship jegulus and hate lily for no reason need to chill; furthermore, people who hate mary and lily for "getting in the way" of their mlm ships are... i'm not going to comment on this, but you probably know what i mean

"stan bambi" comments on snape videos are really annoying because the very same way we don't like (and sometimes get aggressive) over snape lovers attacking the characters we like, why are we doing that to other people?

i need more peter-centered fics, and i do not like him only being a sidekick or ignored. also, mary is also a very interesting character, and i don't think we credit her enough for it

dorlene > wolfstar

the girls are far more interesting than people make them out to be and i NEED an atyd-like fic (long canon compliant etc) from their povs. it's not a want, it's a need, and i might just write it myself, because i think that a fic like that has a lot of potential

dorcas is morally grey and i need more fics in which that is a thing

this might be my most unpopular opinion but i prefer lily to regulus; i find them both to be very interesting characters, but i find myself more drawn to lily

pretty privilege is REAL in this fandom. bet that if peter and snape were conventionally attractive, they would be as loved as evan, barty, and regulus

i do not see sirius as transfem but why do people have to be so pressed about this hc. lif you don't see it, shut up, move on with your day, and let people who see it do their thing; this fandom is TOO pressed about other people's hcs

i kind of dislike fanon james because they strip him of all humanity and emotions, and make him a ray of walking sunshine with no issues (hence my essay on it, which you can read here)

james would choose sirius over regulus any day

[pippin-pippout]

I just watched MelonTeee's video on Ace and Worth and man the internal debate I have with myself on whether I agree with the choice or not...

Her video explains the fandom's love for the character so well, as well as why the tragedy hit so hard. For me personally I have not been that affected by a character death in a LONG time.

And I understand it from a certain narrative perspective – mainly how Ace's past continues to feature in the story a decade later, and Whitebeard's line that someone would carry Ace's flame, because that clearly describing Luffy. He goes after the mera mera no mi and finishes what Ace started in Wano.

But there are two major narrative reasons given for Ace's death that I disagree with. And are largely why I think it shouldn't have happened, and also why the death has hit me so hard.

This is going to get long, but I would really love to hear everyone's thoughts on it if you choose to read!

To give Luffy the push he needed to be stronger: I am pretty confident this is Oda's stated reason (in addition to Oda wanting to prove he could kill characters which I guess he said at one point and which is bleh given the level of injury a character sustains seems to have nothing to do with whether they die or not lol it's just what the author wants to happen). Anyway. That push already happened on Sabaody when Luffy lost everyone to Duma. He was HELPLESS. More helpless than he was through most of marineford. And when Rayleigh convinces Luffy to do the 2 years training, Rayleigh only brings up their epic defeat on Sabaody. He does not bring up marineford or Ace's death as a reason Luffy needs to get stronger. Because Luffy did not need that reason. The only argument I can think of is that maybe once he landed on Amazon Lily, and he realized the strawhats were likely alive, the terror he felt on Sabaody abated slightly. And therefore maybe he needed a reminder of what "loss" truly is to re-motivate him. However, I don't think that is really fitting with his character or the story.

Ace's dream was fulfilled: Oda has talked about the reason he doesn't kill villains is because not having your dream fulfilled is a worse fate than death. I think part of the tragedy of Ace's death was that his dream wasn't fulfilled. Even for those who accept his last words - that he had only one regret which was not seeing Luffy accomplish his dream - the amount of time he got to live with that dream was literally the last moments of his life. But I don't think just because you die with no regrets, does not mean your dream is fulfilled. Especially when Ace never truly internalized what his dream was. His final choice to turn around showed HOW MUCH he still was that lonely, scared little kid he was at 10 despite his warm smile and his growing family. The most heartbreaking part of the flashback was not Sabo's death. It was watching Ace asking the question "do I deserve to exist?" and giving all his devotion to those who said yes. It was him making the exact same decision he would make 10 years later, to refuse to run, because he felt like if he ran he would lose everything and Luffy was standing behind him. Ace's final words do more than state he has no regrets. He also gives the answer to the question he'd asked Garp, and that Garp had said only his actions could decide. Ace died thanking Luffy and his family for loving him despite the "worthless" or "good for nothing" person he was. Ace was moved to tears to hear his family emphatically saying "YES. You do deserve to live! We want you to live!" But Ace never actually believed it. His last words were a reflection of gratitude for the love he was given that he didn't feel he deserved. And thus his final answer to the question "Do I deserve to exist?" was no.

That he was too "good" This is kind of the most upsetting one I've heard (thankfully not a lot) and also the one easiest to dismiss. Ace, being the actual son of the pirate king, being super powerful, growing in strength and reputation faster than Luffy (debatable), put him narratively in competition with Luffy. What I mean by that is it positions him as too much the golden character, the mary sue, the typical protagonist, when One Piece is about Luffy's story, not Ace's. I disagree with the premise of seeing Ace's character that way. But also even he was "that" character, it's pretty clear Ace's dream would have taken him to becoming Whitebeard's heir - whose dream it was to build a family - while Luffy is Gol D Roger's heir. So Ace's journey would have supported the main story of One Piece and also be narratively satisfying.

---

What Was Ace's Dream?

The dreams Ace stated out loud were more reflections of his actual, deeper dream. "I want to be the king of the pirates" - because he wanted to prove his existence and his worth to the world. Which switched to "I want to make whitebeard the king of the pirates" - because Whitebeard loved him despite his blood, and so even if that wasn't what Whitebeard wanted, it was how Ace understood he could repay Whitebeard.

Both of those stated dreams get back to this question he'd been asking his whole life - that of worth. Worth and Love, which, for Ace's character, are inseparable.

For Ace's dream to truly be fulfilled, it's not enough for him to accept he was loved – which he did on the scaffolds, crying from happiness – he had to believe he was worth that love. He had to love himself.

Ace died with that dream tragically unfulfilled.

---

The Purpose of One Piece

Of course the decision to kill Ace makes the story more realistic and of course it is heartbreaking, tragic, moving, and obviously inspires deeper discussion.

However, what rankled me from when I first learned about his death, which was way before I was even introduced to the character in Alabasta, was that he is the only character of the younger generation (outside of flashbacks) to die.

Honestly when I first heard Ace was one of the only characters to die, I was just worried it would make him seem weaker or stupider than every other character, which is a personal pet peeve of mine. Luckily for most fans, it didn't do that.

Instead, what wound up upsetting me was how it seemed to contradict the purpose of the story that is One Piece (at least what I think the purpose is). In doing so, it opposes the meaning that many fans find in this absurd, ridiculous, inspiring, heartfelt, heroic tale about a boy made of rubber.

One Piece is an escapist story about a boy named Luffy who inspires every good guy he meets to pursue and achieve their dream. It's also about Luffy beating up every bad guy who punishments are that they cannot fulfill their morally reprehensible dreams.

Because of Ace's premature death, he is the only good guy character in the main timeline who does not get to pursue his dream. And what's extra tragic is that he is also one of the most deserving of seeing his dream fulfilled.

[whatstruthgottodowithit]

I Cry 2

Fandom: Harry Potter [Marauders Era]

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Sirius Black [Wolfstar]

Characters: Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, James Potter, Peter Pettigrew, Lily Evans, Original Male Character Mary MacDonald

Word Count: 3434

Rating: Teen

Summary: It's alright mate I cry too.

Tags/ Warnings: Hogwarts, Summer Challenge, Writing Challenge, Song Fic, Realising Feelings, Declarations of Love, Sexuality Struggles, Shame, Sirius is in denial, Attitudes of the Time

Notes: This is my summer writing challenge 2024. Seven fics over seven days - all will be hp based and song fics.

Summer Challenge 2024 // Song Inspo

‘Who shags someone in someone else’s bed?’

Remus didn’t bother turning around. He didn’t need to because he could picture the expression on Sirius’ face without looking, the way he’d barged into his room and slammed the door behind him without bothering to knock, signalling the mood he was in. Instead he kept pulling his pyjamas from his rickety old chest of drawers as he replied, ‘let me guess, James and Lily?’

When he turned Sirius was sitting on his bed, arms splayed behind him as he propped himself up, his pink lips drawn in the pout Remus had expected though it unclenched as he said, ‘I was just about to get into bed but no! He’s getting his leg over in a room that’s not even his!’

‘Weren’t you saying last week you wanted a godchild?’ Remus countered, hiding his eye rolling at the dramatic tone his friend used by busying himself with changing his t-shirt, ‘I thought you were all for this wedded bliss lark.’

‘I am when it’s at their own house,’ Sirius grumbled, ‘not shagging in someone else’s bed.’

‘Didn’t you and Mary once-’ Remus started to counter but he was cut off.

‘Yeah well that was ages ago. School kid stuff and besides you know Mary, all you have to do is look at her and she’s got her knickers around her ankles,’ Sirius said scathingly. It was a cheap shot, namely because she wasn’t around to let him get away with saying such a thing, but it wasn’t exactly warranted. Not when one could argue the man in question had a reputation just as questionable. Maybe that was why they’d been such a match, a volatile one sure, but a match nevertheless. Well up until recently, their on and off again dynamic seeming permanently off.

That was probably why he didn’t bother saying anything. Standing up for Mary would no doubt cause an argument between him and the long-haired boy and seeing as he was mid-cycle and had just been forced to endure a birthday party he hadn’t requested he was too tired to get into it. Instead, he shrugged off his jeans and pulled his pyjama pants on quickly allowing Sirius to ponder in silence.

Except he took his silence for what it was, deliberate avoidance, and feeling ignored he said, ‘I just wanted to go to bed. Not even like I can kip on the couch because Pete’s sprawled out on it.’

‘You can sleep in here if you want. Double bed and that,’ Remus said, hoping it would stem the flow of self-pity. His bed was calling him, the bags under his eyes feeling heavier the longer he was forced to interact, even with Sirius.

‘Aw Moony my hero,’ Sirius said, rising from his lolling position and looking up at his friend with a beaming smile.

‘Yeah, yeah, I know I’m an angel,’ Remus said rolling his eyes, ‘it’s nothing to do with how cranky you are hungover, even without a night on the floor. Now get changed, will you?’

As Remus climbed into bed, yanking the duvet out from under Sirius, he leapt up moving quickly to get changed. He didn’t bother with clothes; his own pyjamas would be in his room which was occupied and trying to find something of Remus’ would require too much brain power and so he merely stripped out of his shirt and pants and climbed into bed beside his friend.

‘Hmm,’ Sirius said as he leant against the headboard, turned towards his friend who was sitting up, the book that had been on his bedside table now in hand, the pages illuminated by the lamp beside him, which was now the only light on, a flick of his wand sorting an ambient backdrop as Sirius had clambered into bed.

‘What?’ Remus asked, trying to hold in a sigh.

‘Thought you were tired,’ Sirius said simply.

‘I am,’ Remus said. In truth he was. He had been tired all week but it was less to do with genuine weariness and rather social exhaustion. A night in with his friends didn’t elicit the same level of fatigue that chit-chatting with mild acquaintances did. In fact if it was anyone other than Sirius in his bed he probably would’ve doused the lights and laid there in silence.

‘So why are you reading then?’ Sirius challenged.

‘To wind down,’ Remus said, trying to focus his eyes on the page instead of on the way Sirius’ grey gaze was burning into his face.

‘Oh yeah,’ Sirius said, ‘I’ve heard Bowie does the same thing. Forget coke and hookers, get me a book and a cup of tea for the tour bus.’

‘Very funny,’ Remus grumbled, ‘you’re a pillock you know that?’

‘Might have been said,’ Sirius said, resting back against the headboard with a smile on his face.

‘Well if you’d rather coke and hookers feel free to go and find them but in my room it’s books and brews,’ Remus said finally, sinking down and pulling the duvet up towards him so that his book was nestled in view without him having to hold it.

He could feel Sirius was longing to make some quippy response but the way he’d angled himself had made it seem as though their conversation was over and so he sunk down too. Remus tried to focus on his book. He just had a few more pages until the end of the chapter and then he could settle down and go to sleep. But he could feel Sirius awake beside him, practically hear his mind whirring away as he thought about something. He thought it might be some more teasing or perhaps something about Mary or even reignited irritation about James and Lily but it wasn’t that at all.

‘Suppose it’s easy for you to judge,’ Sirius sighed after an interlude of silence. Remus could have probably gotten away with pretending as though he hadn't heard him, the slumber he was working towards close by but instead he took the bait and pushed sleep away as he answered, ‘what?’

‘The shagging thing,’ Sirius said simply, ‘I mean out of the four of us you have the moral high ground I suppose. What with you being…’

‘Being what?’ Remus said, fully aware he was biting the bait Sirius was laying down though he couldn’t stop himself. By now he’d pushed up, forcing Sirius further onto the other side of the bed as he looked down at him with irritation.

‘Well sexless,’ Sirius shrugged.

‘I am not sexless!’ Remus protested.

‘Oh don’t get your knickers in a twist,’ Sirius said dismissively, rolling his eyes as Remus threw his book onto the duvet irately, ‘you know what I mean…you’re just very secretive when it comes to sex. I mean I’ve never met anyone you’ve shagged.’

‘Well excuse me for not going into graphic detail about every encounter I’ve ever had but I doubt me talking about how big some lad's cock is would go down very well would it?’ Remus snapped, ‘in fact I think Pete’s head would explode.’

With that it went quiet. Sirius seemed stunned into silence and Remus immediately started to feel embarrassment flooding through him so much so he was happy he was wearing a t-shirt as he was sure the splotchy red his chest would be turning would only mortify him further. He didn’t look at his friend, instead he turned his attention to his book though the words didn’t make any sense.

Sirius shifted, turning towards him as he cleared his throat and though Remus didn’t look at him as he wanted him to he spoke anyway, a mumbled, ‘I didn’t mean to upset you.’

‘You didn’t upset me,’ Remus protested, ‘it’s just…it’s just not the same for me that’s all.’

‘Why not?’ Sirius asked.

‘Because it’s not,’ Remus replied but when Sirius didn’t speak he chanced a glance and found the boy watching him curiously. In fact it was quite reminiscent of the way Padfoot looked at him, the only thing missing a tilted head to make him truly the picture of a big shaggy dog. Remus sighed.

‘It’s just different okay?’ Remus said, feeling simultaneously uncomfortable and yet obligated to explain, ‘everyone’s fine with it until you start actually talking about it. Talking about it means they have to think about it and that makes them uncomfortable which makes me uncomfortable. And it’s hard to explain to the person I’m trying to get off with that being with them in front of people makes me uncomfortable without sounding like they're the problem.’

‘Yeah but you don’t feel like that around us right?’ Sirius asked. When Remus dropped his gaze Sirius fell quiet for a moment until he said, ‘you don't have to feel uncomfortable around us. We don’t care…not even Pete.’

‘Yeah well doesn’t really matter,’ Remus said dismissively, ‘it’s not like I’ve got anyone worth being uncomfortable for recently.’

Once more they fell silent, the pair of them staring anywhere but the other as the words marinated in the air. Again it was Sirius to break the silence whether because he had far more alcohol swirling around his blood stream or because it was his nature not to let something drop Remus didn’t know.

‘Moony,’ he said after a moment.

‘Yeah?’ Remus asked, wishing he’d just gotten into bed and gone to sleep.

‘Can I ask you something?’ he asked, his tone genuinely curious. Remus knew he could say no, that if he was truly firm with him he would respect his boundaries and let whatever curiosity go. But he didn’t have the heart to and agreed, ‘yeah.’

‘How did you know?’ Sirius asked quietly. At that Remus finally looked at him, he was watching the other boy, his face sympathetic and kind as he noted Remus’ surprise, ‘that I was gay?’

‘Yeah,’ Sirius said, ‘if you never…’

‘I have,’ Remus said, already feeling his defensiveness mounting.

‘But you’ve never had a boyfriend right?’ he said tactfully trying to assure him he wasn’t being accusatory but rather logical.

‘S’pose not,’ Remus said, able to see how one might meet that conclusion. After all, how was he to know, other than one drunken declaration that he was gay at a quidditch after party, Remus rarely talked about his sexuality. He never spoke about his crushes or partners the way his friends did. He didn’t know why, his friends accepted him for who he was, but to do so felt like he was giving them a chance to find fault. Logically he knew that would never happen, they’d accepted him being a bloody werewolf for merlin’s sake, but he was already of the minority. He didn’t feel like highlighting that fact further.

‘Then again have you met men? I’d rather take my chances being single,’ Remus joked, trying his best to lighten the mood but Sirius seemed deep in thought. He didn’t even offer him that signature Sirius black smirk merely asking instead, ‘so how did you know?’

‘I didn’t just decide one day if that’s what you mean,’ Remus said though his tone must've come out sharper than intended as Sirius’ eyes flashed with panic and he sat up and shifted awkwardly.

‘Never mind it’s none of my business,’ he muttered, moving away from him.

For a moment Remus thought he was going to say goodnight, roll over and feign sleep even though the light was still on and he never slept in anything but utter darkness. But Remus suddenly felt the urge not to let him. In fact he was starting to feel that this was less about Remus than either of them had thought.

‘I didn’t know,’ Remus said, staring at the wall opposite them so that when his head inevitably snapped up he wouldn’t feel him staring back at him, ‘I know some people know but I didn’t…well not unless you count getting a rod on over Ziggy Stardust but other than that,’ he joked and when he risked a glance at the other boy he was met with a small smile which spurred his story telling on, ‘I just well…the way you all seemed mad about girls I just didn’t get it. I mean they’re nice and I’m friends with plenty but I just didn’t have any interest in them. Then one day Elliot Vane kissed me and it click-’

‘Elliot Vane!?’ Sirius gasped.

‘Yeah,’ Remus said, ‘at a party in fifth year.’

‘Wow,’ Sirius breathed, ‘I didn’t know he was.’

‘I don’t think he is. I mean he might be but to be honest I think he was just really hammered,’ Remus said, resting back against the headboard as he reminisced about the raven haired sculpted Romeo he’d shared his first kiss with. They’d never really spoken about it after, just an acknowledging nod the next day that signalled to Remus it was a done thing but it had been nice all the same.

‘Still it made me realise maybe there was a reason I didn’t feel like that for girls,’ Remus said, ‘then there was this lad at home in the summer and we sorta became a thing and well it all made sense then I guess.’

Sirius looked as though he was deep in thought and Remus sat and watched him. It was like watching himself in a way, all those years ago when he’d thought himself sick about the ideas he’d been having. After all, didn't everyone find Ziggy Stardust attractive? Didn’t the boys speak of the girls with at least some hint of annoyance, the way he felt?  

‘It doesn’t have to mean anything you know,’ he whispered after a minute, guilty grey eyes meeting his a second later, ‘if Elliot had kissed me and I didn’t feel anything then it would’ve just been a kiss.’

‘I know that,’ Sirius said quietly, ‘but what if one kiss changes everything…I know it didn’t change you but it made you realise who you were right?’

‘Yeah I guess,’ Remus said, ‘and I’m not going to pretend like I didn’t have a nightmare trying to figure it out on my own. My heart felt right but my head not so much. And I'm sure I'm not the first person to cry over their sexuality.’

‘What if you tried it but it wasn’t what you expected. What if you didn’t like it at all?’ Sirius asked. His voice was small and quiet but the pair had sunken lower on the pillows so that there wasn’t much of a gap between them anymore and Remus could hear him clear as day.

‘Try something else?’ Remus suggested with a half-hearted smile, ‘like I said it’s not a big deal. I mean what was it that bloke said, the one we learned about in muggle studies, the physicist-’

‘Einstein?’ Sirius asked, his brow furrowed, unable to see what his friend was on about.

‘Yeah him, didn’t he say that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results?’ Remus asked, continuing as Sirius’ brow furrowed further, ‘so wouldn’t that be like me sleeping with every girl I come into contact with and hoping it would make me fancy them?’

‘But it’s the same thing isn’t it?’ Sirius asked, ‘pursuing someone in the hopes they’ll turn you into something you're not is the same as pursuing someone you might have no interest in just because you’re a bit confused.’

‘Look it’s a complicated thing I won’t deny it,’ Remus said, ‘but doing something because you don’t want to be yourself and doing something because you’re not sure who you are are two different things. And chances are no one’s going to be angry at you for trying to figure it out.’

‘That’s the thing. I don’t know what I want,’ Sirius said sadly.

‘That’s not a crime,’ Remus replied sympathetically. 

‘Feels like it is,’ Sirius said grimly, ‘because what if I don’t like it? If I’m not-’

‘Pads that’s okay,’ Remus said, placing his hand over the top of his friends in the hopes of comforting him. It wasn’t what he wanted to do, by nature he wasn’t very touchy feely but under the confines of the duvet it was the only pieces of flesh available to him. Sirius looked at it and Remus looked at him, the way his Adam's apple bobbed under pale skin as he swallowed thickly, whatever he wanted to say next, seemingly hard to move from his throat.

‘But what if I don’t want to kiss boys,’ he said quietly, ‘what if…what if I just want to kiss you?’

‘Me?’ Remus said, the disbelief in his voice immediately attracting startled grey eyes upwards.

‘Yeah,’ Sirius whispered, trying to stay firm in his utterances even though his heart had been hammering ten to the dozen since the moment Remus had placed his hand over his.

‘Why me?’ Remus asked.

‘Why not you?’ Sirius asked.

‘Well I’m just-’ he was going to protest. List all of his faults, the things that anyone would see as a reason for them not being together. Put aside the fact Sirius wasn’t entirely sure he swung Remus’ way, the fact that they were friends, best friends, might have implications. Not to mention Remus was far too gangly, moody, scar ridden, irritable, and whatever other fault he could muster to mind. Sirius was none of those things. He was suave and confident. He commanded a room even when he didn’t want to. He made Remus feel warm just by looking at him. Not to mention he was incredibly handsome, debonair and oh my god did Remus have a crush on his best friend?

A crush that started to grow rapidly as Sirius shook his head and said, ‘don’t. Don’t do that, you always put yourself down like that.’

‘I don’t,’ Remus protested.

‘You bloody do,’ Sirius replied.

‘Well I just am-’

‘No you’re not,’ Sirius said firmly, locking his fingers around Remus’ as he looked him firmly in the eye, ‘you’re Moony and I don’t know I guess I always thought you were my best mate but I don’t know…because you’re different to me than James is...maybe it’s since we moved in here and it’s just the two of us…but it feels different… like we’re more than mates…’

He was watching him now, his thumb tracing circles over the back of Remus’ pale hand, his voice shaky as he added, ‘for me at least.’

‘I know what you mean,’ Remus said because he did. He guessed he had never thought about Sirius that way because he was well Sirius. His best friend, the one that understood him no matter what. Of course they had their issues, they bickered like an old married couple so much so there had been concern that moving in together would last all of five minutes but it was never serious. They worked well together, they understood one another. The more Remus thought about it the more he felt as though it was glaringly obvious how much he cared for the boy. And Sirius was right, it wasn’t a care he extended to James or Peter. He wondered if he had been born a girl that this would've been easier to navigate. But it wasn’t.

And Sirius clearly thought as much as he said, ‘but what if it’s not? What if I’m not…y'know and it’s just some random thought? What if I do just like girls-’

‘Sirius,’ Remus said, unable to stop his heart from squeezing at the thought of it.

‘What if I ruin everything for no reason?’ Sirius whispered, ‘I can't do that to you. You're Moony.’

‘Padfoot,’ Remus said firmly. Sirius fell quiet, before uttering a worried, ‘yeah?’

‘It doesn’t have to mean anything,’ Remus said, though he wasn’t sure how it couldn’t. Because it was easy not to want Sirius when he didn’t think there was a chance he could have him. It was easy to acknowledge how handsome he was when it was just a thought he had on a whim. Who knew what a taste of something real would do to him.

‘But it could mean everything,’ Sirius said.

‘Yeah it could,’ Remus agreed.

Their heads were touching now, their breath intermingling, Sirius’ a mixture of beer and fags and Remus’ minty from brushing his teeth. Neither of them cared as they watched one another. Slowly Sirius moved his hand until it was ghosting along Remus’ neck, his pulse throbbing under pale scarred flesh.

‘Moony?’ Sirius whispered.

‘Yeah?’ Remus asked thickly.

‘Can I kiss you?’

‘Yeah.’

[shivstar]

Kinda weird question to ask when most of the people I interact on Tumblr are prongsfoot shippers,,,

But what do you guys think James Potter can do Or what event can happen making Sirius really pissed off to the point of not wanting James in his life...

Like I love Prongsfoot too but seeing this guy practically worship James Potter both in canon and decent fanon stories too. It is like having eaten too much sweet. Now i want a bit of spiciness and saltiness....

You know those friends to enemies to lovers tropes. Where they were super close friends but then one of them did something and then everything was changed...( I am not talking about miscommunication tropes.... )))

We are all people who write or imagine stories and in fictional world anything is possible. So how can this happen due to situations. Without altering their key personalities and who they are as a person....

I mean there have to be some cases where dogs too loose their loyalties?

I am not talking about just distancing and loving them from afar. I am talking about hating their guts at most Or atleast like not wanting to do anything with them. Plain indifference is even worst....

To be honest always seeing too loyal Sirius ready to wait out for James has irked me somewhat in Prongsfoot fandom. Like we see Sirius talking too much about James in canon but the one scene we have of James and Sirius, Harry concludes within a second that James will do anything for Sirius, but in fictions it is always like Sirius was in love with James and James just gave up on that because he liked Lily more Or he had interanalized homophobia etc, at the end making it all about Sirius suffering ind finally getting James meanwhile James has fun with wife and kids who then becomes good friends with Lily after their divorce because nothing bad comes to golden boy Potter.

So l like the idea of Sirius taking the reigns of his life back in his hand. And doing some self loving after realising that he is no longer a priority in James's life after Lily and then James being like realising what he has lost after taking Sirius for grated for too long and groveling and all.

So ... I guess this is an open prompt/ request, if you guys could do any snippet or would like to talk more on this....🥺🥺🥺.... I mean there has to be someone in entire Hp fandom who has had enough of wump Sirius... Or is it just me..?

[saintsenara]

do you go with word of god about how tom would have been better off if merope lived and raised him or that it would have been even worse for him and merope would have become infatuated because of his resemblance to tom riddle sr? (Similar to how part of the fandom believes snape would be if harry resembled lily lmao) which of do you think its more interesting route?

thank you very much for the ask, anon!

i go for the first of the two options - that merope living would have been so much better for wee tom riddle jr. - not because it's what jkr says, but because i tend to loathe any interpretation of merope's character which undermines the fact that so much of her life could have been changed at numerous crucial moments by anyone connected to the wizarding state giving a fuck.

merope is a teenage girl who lives in abject poverty, has a treatable medical condition [exotropia - eyes which stare in different directions] for which she clearly hasn't received any medical care, is denied an education, is subjected to physical violence by her father right there on the canon page, and is implied in canon to be subjected to incestuous sexual violence by her father and/or brother. the state has numerous opportunities to remove her from this experience - when marvolo fails to respond to her hogwarts letter, when bob ogden visits the gaunts - and yet doesn't, and while i don't think that just being taken away from morfin and marvolo would have solved everything, it would have given her the safety to start healing...

i get why the idea of merope as this sinister, unhinged, devouring, unchangeable bundle of malevolence, who would destroy her own son by becoming infatuated with him, is compelling when the genre demands it to be - i've written her as a folk-horror villain myself, and she was perfect for the role - but in fics which aren't intentionally going for that sort of supernatural, dark fairytale, horror-story vibe... i don't think it hits.

merope's great tragedy - much like her son's - is that she is someone capable of and longing for a normal life, but who is denied this by the corrosive forces of grief, poverty, abuse, and indifference and who goes on to perpetuate harm in turn.

as i've said elsewhere, her rape [and we should call it what it is] of tom riddle sr. doesn't actually need to have any undercurrent of sadistic, unhinged infatuation to be both morally abhorrent and canon-coherent - her treatment at her father and brother's hands would hardly have given her an understanding of consent or bodily autonomy [and might also have made her believe that drugging a man until you can totally control him is the only way to prevent him hurting you], while the fact that the state just leaves her on her own after marvolo and morfin are arrested [with - presumably - no income to speak of] means that she can be understood as seeing tom sr. as her only escape from sliding ever further down the ladder of destitution.

does that mean that she didn't also - selfishly - desire tom sr.? absolutely not. it just means that i find it much more interesting when the idea of her wanting him for herself is given equal weight with all the other things in her life which shape her character - and that i also find it much more interesting when these forces are recognised as commonplace, human, and having pretty much nothing to do with magic.

[the state would not - after all - have had to raise a wand in order to unravel the abuse to which she is subjected... since it does this all the time in the real world - and i am definitely a sucker for stories which acknowledge that the greatest flaws in the wizarding world don't depend in the slightest on magic, but on human corruption.]

if she'd survived childbirth - while i'm certainly not suggesting that i think she'd have been a flawless mother, nor that the absence of a wizarding welfare state wouldn't have made their lives incredibly difficult - i think it's legitimately implausible to suggest that she'd have done anything other than love her son as her son [so, without any incestuous vibe].

[her comment - "i hope he looks like his papa" - is, i think, meant as mrs cole takes it - that she recognises that she's someone who isn't conventionally attractive by any means, and that she knows that tom riddle sr. is.]

[bad268]

Liam lawson

but

I remember there one dtm video(red bull) being where alex and lily were in it and that was rlly cute

so hoow bout the reader coming to watch liam and they juts being cute throughout :)

Compilations (Liam Lawson X Reader)

Fandom: RPF/Formula 2/3

Requested: Clearly (bruh I strayed so far but I think this is cute too. I rewatched all of the DTM videos and I was like *compilation*), (italics are clips from the video)

Warnings: Language haha

Pronouns: I/me/they/them

W.C. 3428

Summary: Liam and his significant other take a trip down memory lane for a video.

As always, my requests are OPEN

MASTERLIST // HITLIST

~~(^Google/RedBull Content Pool)

It was two in the morning. My phone should not be ringing. Rolling over and answering it without looking at the ID, “Well, someone better be dying.”

“I’m dying,” the voice, who I was able to recognize as Liam, laughed on the other end. “Okay, I’m not dying.”

“Could’ve had me fooled,” I mumbled, burying my face into my pillow while keeping the phone to my ear. “Not that I’m upset that you called, well kind of actually, but what do you want?”

“Oh, do you not want me to call you?” He teased back.

“I do just not at two in the fucking morning, Liam,” I complained, “Especially when I had an alarm set at three for my flight. I’m not going back to sleep now, so I hope you’re happy with yourself.”

“I’ll keep you company,” He chuckled. “I was mainly calling because I wanted to make sure you were still coming this week.”

“You couldn’t have called me a couple of days ago?” I accused. I didn’t let him respond as I continued ranting, getting increasingly louder as I progressed. “Or yesterday? Or last night? Or fucking texted me because it is two in the morning?!”

“I mean, a reasonable time to call you would’ve been mid-day or something for me and I was doing car stuff,” He explained calmly, knowing that I was just moody because he woke me up too early. “I’m sorry.”

“You’re lucky you’re cute,” I grumbled, immediately switching the call to a FaceTime. “There, if you’re going to make me stay awake, the least you could do is let me look at you.”

“Glad you find my looks good enough to keep you awake,” He joked.

“Anyways,” I switched topics as I propped my phone up against the headboard, so I could use my hands to hold my head up, “I know you did not just call me to ask if I was still coming. What’s up?”

“Just wanted to make sure because the Red Bull media team wants us to do a video for YouTube,” He explained as he moved on his end to a corner of the trailer after being given the go-ahead to chill out until they went back to the hotel.

“But I’m not a driver?” I asked, confused as to why they would want me in the video.

“Never said you were, love,” He chuckled again. “They want us to react to some videos.”

“That makes me nervous,” I replied with a nervous laugh. “Do I get to know what videos?”

“I don’t even know,” Liam started.

“You are not going to break him that easily, Y/n!” Alex cut in from the background. Just then, Alex‘s head appears in the corner of the frame with an enthusiastic wave, “Hi, by the way.”

“Hello, Alex,” I giggled, waving back, “Do you know what we’re doing?”

“Do I look like I’m in Red Bull? No,” He laughed in response. “But hey, I need to steal your boyfriend. We need to do a final debrief before heading back to the hotel. I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”

“Yeah, I’ll be there tomorrow afternoon,” I said, shaking my head at his nonsense. “Do I at least get a moment to say goodbye to my boyfriend?”

“Don’t keep him too long,” Alex says, leaving the frame and walking away, “The faster we do the debrief, the faster we go to sleep!”

“Huh, funny how you guys get to have uninterrupted sleep tonight, and I’m here bickering back and forth with my boyfriend and his teammate at two in the fucking morning!” I said sarcastically before dissolving into shouts toward the end.

“There’s no way it’s still two there,” Liam quipped back.

“Ah, you’re right,” I replied sarcastically after I checked the time before yelling, “It is three in the fucking morning now!” I stopped, taking a deep breath and calming down before saying, “I need to finish packing. I leave for my flight in a couple of hours, and I need to get ready and take a shower. I’ll text you before I take off, not call you because I value your beauty sleep. You need it.”

“Hey!” He objected. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means I love you, and I’m hanging up now,” I smiled into the camera, pretending to not see his shocked expression.

“This isn’t over, but I’ll let you go,” He said while pointing at the camera. He put his finger down and just smiled at the camera, “I love you too, call me when you land please?”

“Of course,” I reassured, “I’ll see you tomorrow. Wait, today technically. I’ll be there by dinner.”

“Good, I’ll take you out,” He responded.

“I don’t know if that’s supposed to be a threat or an invite, and I’m not sure if I want to stick around to find out,” I joked quickly before saying bye and hanging up just as fast.

~~

Landing in Italy was crazy because of the time change. Initially, I thought I would land in the late afternoon/early evening time frame but due to the difference, I was already getting to the hotel before lunch. Part of me just wanted to pass out from jet lag, but the other half wanted to go to the track to see Liam. Come to find out, they had free practice, so I wouldn’t even be able to see Liam until afterward anyway. Thus, I just decided to chill out, nap, and unpack a few things while I had nothing else to do.

At around two, I got a text from Liam, asking me to meet him in the lobby, so we could do the mysterious video.

“Do you know anything now?” I asked as soon as I sat in the car.

“Well, hello to you too,” he joked, waiting for me to greet him, and when I did, he continued. “No, all I know is they want you and me to do it.”

“That is definitely not suspicious at all,” I replied sarcastically before we pulled up to the track. We walked hand-in-hand to the AF Course trailer where we would be filming, and they already had the cameras and lights set for us. “Do we get to know what we are reacting to, now?”

“Yes,” one of them laughed. “Fans have been sending us these compilation videos of you two around the paddock, so you’re both going to watch it. Make it cute.”

“Oh, no pressure there,” Liam jested, taking a seat on the couch while I follow to sit beside him. They signaled that the cameras were rolling and that we could start the intro at any point. I decided to let Liam take the lead from the beginning since I wasn’t a driver and wasn’t social media trained. “Hi guys, welcome to the Youtube channel. Today, we brought in my significant other, Y/n, and we are going to react to the compilations you sent us.”

“Yeah, what he said,” I contributed quietly, causing him to laugh at my shyness.

~

It was the first race of the DTM season. Everyone’s nerves were through the roof, but it seemed like Liam’s were through the stratosphere. It was a new season, in a new car, and it was with a new teammate. It was safe to say that he needed all the support he could get, so I decided to surprise him.

With a little help from the crew, I was able to get an extra key to his hotel room and sneak in while he was doing media. I decided I would make myself comfortable, taking one of Liam’s shirts out of his suitcase and changing into it before pulling out my laptop to get some work done while I had the time.

I had my music playing, and I was in a groove, getting a huge chunk of my essay drafted. I took a little dance break when I spun around, and immediately started screaming, not expecting Liam or a camera to be in front of me. “Hey! There’s this new thing! It’s called knocking!”

“Didn't think I needed to knock for my own room,” Liam responded in shock. He slowly approached me as I caught my break before he wrapped an arm around my waist and grabbed my hand. “What are you doing here? You said you have an essay due.”

“Surprise?” I said while shrugging my shoulders, ”I have wifi here, so it’s fine.”

“Happily surprised, yes” He chucked back.

~ “I remember that,” Liam laughed as he paused the video. “I didn’t even realize you were wearing my shirt until just now.”

“Wait, actually?” I looked over at him in confusion. “I thought that was the first thing you noticed.”

“No, the first thing I noticed was my significant other singing and dancing in my hotel room,” He deadpanned before sarcastically adding, “Forgive me for not noticing what you were wearing.”

“Oh, what’s next?” I joked, “You gonna tell me that you didn't notice I cut my hair there either?”

“You cut your hair?” He asked genuinely, rewinding the video to see your hair.

“Oh, brother,” I rolled my eyes.

~

This was a bad idea. The worst actually. Why and how did I let Liam convince me to get in the car with him? I already hate seeing him race at these high speeds. I did not need to experience it, yet here we are. And he is fucking laughing.

“Stop laughing at my pain,” I shouted at him as we took the corner faster than I would have liked. My arm shot out to grab him out reflex as I begged him to slow down. “Liam, my love, apple of my eye, future husband, please slow the fuck down. I’m going to die.”

He just laughs in response, slowing down slightly, but not enough to make me let go of his arm. “If I slow down too much, I’ll get a penalty.”

“What do you mean a penalty?” I shouted at him, “There’s no fucking race!”

“That you know of,” he joked, slowing down even more so he could let go of the steering wheel momentarily to pry my hands off his arm. Once he gets them off his bicep, he just holds one of my hands in his. “Here, you can hold my hand, and I’ll go slower.”

“Not on my watch, mister. You put that hand right back on the steering wheel,” I protested, pulling my hand from his and pushing it toward the steering wheel. He kept laughing at my outbursts while glancing over at me from time to time. “Keep those hands on the wheel, eyes on the road, and get me back to the garage pronto.”

“Damn, so bossy,” he chuckled, proceeding carefully around the circuit, “Y’know, the fans are gonna love this.”

“Well, I’m glad they find my pain amusing,” I groaned, throwing my head back. Liam just laughed in response before I lifted my head, making eye contact with the camera on the dash, “You know what guys, just for my pain, I’m gonna need you to like and subscribe to the channel. Like this is horrifying. I will never do this again, so the least you can do is like and subscribe. Please.”

“Shameless promo, we love to see it.”

~

“And I never did it again,” I smiled at the camera. “I don’t trust him anymore, actually.”

“Hey, I got you back safely, right?” Liam asked, leaning into my side as he wrapped his arms around my waist and laid his head on my shoulder. I turned my head to nod and place a kiss on his forehead. “I haven’t pressured you to do it again either.”

“Maybe I’ll let you do it at the next race,” I whispered to him.

“Really?” he perked up.

“Fuck no!” I exclaimed. “You scared me half to death last time. Why would I willing do it again?”

~

We were in the Hitech trailer with Juri, filming something for their Youtube channel. I was behind the camera just minding my own business while Liam and Juri were arguing, like always, about something I didn’t care to figure out.

“Y/n/n, tell him I’m right,” Liam complained, pulling my attention away from the book I was reading. I look up at them, seeing Juri shaking his head ‘no’ while Liam’s eyes are pleading with me to side with him.

“I think you two can settle this on your own,” I sighed, going back to my book.

“Aren’t you supposed to love me?” Liam groaned, sliding down the chair he was sitting in just to be dramatic. “How can you go against me like that?”

“You’re teammates. Work it out,” I pressed, pointing between the two.

“Alright everyone, it’s official,” Juri starts, looking straight into the camera, “Y/n and Liam are breaking up. Sorry guys.”

“Cool, I’m single now,” I jested, “I’m gonna call Oscar.”

“You better not!” Liam shouted running over to me, grabbing my phone and throwing it to the side.

“Way to go dumbass,” I grumbled, watching my phone shatter against the wall.

“I’ll buy you a new one, just don’t joke about that,” He whispered, pulling me into his chest.

“You know I would never leave you, definitely not with Oscar of all people,” I whispered back, playing with his hair. I decided to tease him even more, “You’ve got hotter friends.”

“Hey you’re messing it up,” He whined as he pulled away to fix his hair. “And I’m gonna pretend I didn't hear you just call my friends hot.”

“You’ll live. Now, finish filming because we are going to get a new phone today,” I said as I pushed him toward Juri.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Ew, don’t ever call me that again.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he responded as he turned away from me, walking to Juri before turning back around to face me once Juri burst out laughing at my glare. “Wait, sorry. Won’t happen again.”

“It better not, Lawson.”

“No, not Lawson,” He whispered with a light chuckle, hanging his head to hide his smile.

“They resorted to your last name,” Juri wheezed but I didn’t hear either of them, “you’re in the doghouse.”

~

I wiped tears away from my eyes from how hard I was laughing, “You guys actually said that? I couldn’t even hear you!”

“Clearly the microphones did,” He laughed at my reaction. “Did you ever end up finishing that book?”

“I don’t think so,” I responded after a second of thinking. “I don’t even remember what book that was, to be honest. I was more focused on my shattered phone.”

“I said I was sorry!” He defended.

“Sorry doesn’t bring back my phone!” I retorted.

“I bought you a new one!”

“But my old one was red. This one is silver,” I complained with a pout.

“There’s a red case on it!”

“Doesn’t mean it’s the same.”

“You are unbelievable,” He rolled his eyes, jokingly before looking straight into the camera, “I can never win.”

“Nope,” I smiled as I popped the ‘p’ and moved to press play on the video, “Now, onto the next clip!”

~

Wet races always gave me anxiety, but they seemed to bring a lot of excitement among the drivers. Originally, it was only expected to rain lightly for the last couple of laps, but that was thrown out the window when the first drops started falling on lap 23 of 28 and the downpour began on lap 26. It felt and looked horrible, yet the stewards did not red-flag the race.

I couldn’t even watch the last laps. Last I checked, Liam was leading with Oscar right behind him, but the rain was making it difficult to see who was winning. It wasn’t until the team started cheering that I was able to let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding. Juri had an engine problem earlier in the race, so I knew that Liam finished the race safely.

Completely disregarding the torrential downpour, I ran out of the garage toward parc ferme where Liam had just parked his car and jumped out. I didn’t give him much of a chance to regain his surroundings before I jumped into his arms, hiding my face in his neck as I wrapped my legs around his torso and his arms held me close. I couldn’t stop the tears from collecting in my eyes, but no one could tell due to the rain.

“You did amazing, Liam,” I whispered after I pulled back just enough to look him in the eyes. “I’m so proud of you.”

“I thought you hated PDA,” he chuckled as he leaned his forehead against mine. “For once, I didn’t initiate this.”

“Shut up and kiss me.”

~

“That was our first public kiss,” I laughed, facing Liam who was still leaning on my shoulder. I leaned forward to place a light kiss on his lips then. “Now, I have no problem with kissing you in front of the cameras.”

“You were a lot more shy back then,” He pointed out, moving to kiss all around my face.

“You say that like it was so long ago. It was maybe a year or two ago,” I giggled, pulling away slightly.

“Actually, that clip was almost three years ago now,” one of the team members spoke up, making us remember that we were not alone.

“You’re kidding!” We both exclaimed.

“Wait, that actually makes sense,” Liam says after a moment of thought, “We’ve been together for almost four years now.”

“God, that makes me feel old,” I sighed.

“Old? We’re 21!”

“And your point?”

~

“You should be out celebrating your birthday,” I cried into Liam’s chest as we laid in his hotel bed. Liam had to travel to the Red Bull factory during the off-season for simulator work, and he brought me with him since it was over his birthday weekend. However, a bug had been going around the factory, and I was its latest victim. So much for celebrating his 21st. “You don’t need to take care of me.”

“What if I want to?” He comforted me, rubbing up and down my back in an attempt to calm me down. “Spending the day cuddling with you in bed doesn’t seem too bad.”

“But you’ll get sick,” I complained. “Then Christian will get made cuz you can’t do the simulator, and you’ll be upset cuz you’re a baby when you’re sick-”

“I am not,” He cut me off, offended.

“Are too.”

“Am not.”

“Are too.”

“Are too.”

“Are not,” I replied quickly before realizing what he did and immediately backtracked. “No, you can’t do that. My brain is running at 900 ping right now.”

“Nope, you admitted I’m not a baby when I’m sick. Which I’m not,” He pointed out as he pulled back a little to check my fever, feeling no change since the last time he checked. “Why don’t we just chill out and watch a movie?”

“That sounds fun,” I mumbled, moving around to get comfy again as Liam laid back on the pillows. “But you pick the movie, birthday boy.”

“Oh, I was already planning on it,” He chuckled, smoothing out my hair that was all over the place. “I don’t think you’ll last 30 minutes.”

“That’s offensive,” I pouted, burying my face in his chest. I was going to complain more before a yawn cut me off, “Ok, you might be right.”

“Of course I am,” He joked lightly. My eyes were already shutting when he looked down at me, kissing my forehead one last time and pulling me in tighter as I fell asleep. “Sleep well, my love.”

~

“I didn’t even know this was recorded,” I said, eyeing the team that stood behind the camera. Conveniently, none of them made eye contact with me. “Huh, wonder how that happened.”

“You have to admit, we’re pretty cute though,” Liam chuckled.

“I wasn’t saying we weren’t,” I argued back. “We are always cute. I mean have you seen us?”

“I think this is a good place to end the video,” He laughed. “This has been my significant other and I reacting to compilations of us.”

“If you want to see more of me, like, comment, and subscribe,” I plugged. Liam and the crew started laughing as I once again promoted the channel. “Maybe I’ll come back for a part two of this.”

“That would be interesting,” Liam said, pointing at the camera. “Anyways, see you next time!”

“Bye!” We said in sync as we waved to the camera.

~~~~~

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