#like ive been on my period for over 2 weeks now

[moonlightpirate]

I'm trying to be patient because I know it is questions they are probably required to ask but also if you're not going to answer your phone and make me message you can we assume that I've already thought of these basic questions as being part of my problem before reaching out to you?

[obsob]

more kitties that live in my sketchbook

[nandermoenthusiast]

life is kicking my ass this year

[taahko]

I just found your blog today can you please explain or point out a post that explains the MASH timeloop thing? I love the show but I've never heard anyone talk abt it that way before

oh yay hurray ive been waiting for an excuse to talk about this lmao sorry this is long

ok so basically maeve (my gf) and i started watching mash for the first time about a month ago and we started joking about it being like the characters were stuck in a time loop mostly because the same basic episode format is repeated over and over, because it's a sitcom from the 70s and the episodes arent meant to be watched en masse where you can start noticing all the little repetitions and plot holes and inconsistencies that naturally occur in longform tv

but then i started to pay attention to the dates being mentioned in the show - famously the korean war never technically ended, but american troops were involved in active on the ground fighting between 1950 and 1953, so the entire 11 seasons of mash have to be squeezed into that three year period. with 251 episodes occurring within 1,129 days, that gives every episode about 4.5 days of real time. so it works right? no time loop right? well wait a sec

for the first 5 seasons or so of mash they give very consistent dates about when things are happening. for example, bj arrives in korea in september of 1952, at the start of season 4. colonel potter arrives about a week after him, and talks about how he has 18 months left before his retirement. that gives us about 7 months for the shows final 7 seasons to take place in, meaning that by the episode 'point of view' in season 7 we should be around december of 1952. in that episode the pov character starts writing a letter home and in the corner he writes the date:

september of 1951. ok, could be that this episode isn't meant to take place in the regular timeline of the season - maybe for some reason its just like, a random flashback episode. but bj, charles, and potter are all present, even though none of them got to korea until 1952. now i KNOW that this is not like, the True Hidden Secret Lore of MASH, this is the writers realizing they were running out of road and turning back the clock a bit to accommodate for how long the show was running on. but play in my time loop space with me please

more talking points:

consistent jokes about time zones and how difficult it is to call the states because "our today is their yesterday but if you call them now it might not reach them until our tomorrow and by that point our yesterday will be their today"

hawkeye's increasing mania over the seasons and his conviction that the war will never end, comparing the camp to dante's inferno multiple times. maeve once pointed out that the closer hawkeye comes to realizing that he's trapped in a time loop the closer he gets to being institutionalized - and what does the series finale cold open onto ? hawkeye in a mental institution. the only way out is to lose yourself etc. sidenote frank also escaped the time loop by going insane and getting institutionalized

in a war for all seasons bj potter and charles are all present at the 1951 new years party as well as the 1952 new years party

there are three christmas episodes, two of which bj is present for even though he should only have spent one christmas in korea

details of people's families and lives shift around - sometimes potter's got multiple grandchildren, sometimes he only has one, sometimes its a girl, sometimes its a boy, sometimes she's 5, sometimes he's 2

we're not the first people to talk about this either, here's a good video compilation posted a couple yrs ago of time loop moments

overall ive been using the time loop thesis to add another layer to my mash viewing experience. it increases the already present sense of constant dread, anger, frustration, and disgust with their situation that the characters feel, plus it feels like a very poignant take on the united states' constant warmongering and violent existence. it really never ends, it just goes on an on. the future's been canceled by the war department- we're just gonna replay the past.

[is-this-yuri]

have you been doomscrolling? feeling awful about it? do you feel out of control? does it seem your autonomy has been swallowed by the ever present beast that is the internet?

we live in the most overwhelmingly stimulating age of humanity ever seen, and it's only getting worse. our brains are sponges, soaking up whatever we smear them across, and it seems more and more difficult to find a clean surface to rest on. i'm no expert or professional, but ive been born and raised into the internet, and i'd like to hand out some wisdom regarding this.

the main issue: brain poison

since the brain absorbs whatever it's exposed to, media consumption is unsurprisingly going to effect it. the type of media, the amount of media, and the frequency of the media all play a factor.

it's not the internet itself that's bad here. it's the media on the internet, and the platforms designed to suck in our attention and keep it there until we're rotting inside our skulls.

we're never going to escape the internet. it's just a fact of life now, and a tool that can be used for wonderful things. so how do we learn to live with the internet and take advantage of its potential?

treat it like a dietary balance

staying aware of what goes in your brain is just as important as being aware of what you're eating. if you eat carelessly, don't listen to how your body feels after you eat certain things, and ignore any sickness that might result from rotten food, you're going to have a bad time and wreck your guts. the same goes for the brain.

you want to have a good mix of various types of media in the right amounts, or approximately so. if things are feeling bland, maybe diversify. if things are feeling stupid, try something more intellectual. if it's feeling too much, cut back on all of it

the following are three things you can do to maintain a sense of control and awareness over your media diet. this isnt a step by step and is in no particular order, theyre just ideas to carry forward in general any time it could be helpful.

1. digest

this is the process of thinking about and remembering what youve done throughout your time on the internet. it could apply to any period of time. so you might think, 'man, i've done nothing but watch tiktok all day.' or 'i've been scrolling twitter a lot more this past week.'

i feel like most people already do this to some extent, but it manifests as a fleeting sense of anxiety or shame that doesn't lead anywhere. analyze that feeling, and ask if it's really true or helpful.

ask if your media consumption is making you feel less focused, distracted, putting you into a brain fog, making you fall asleep when you don't want to, making you irritable and angry, drawing you into arguments, keeping you awake at night, or upsetting/disrupting you in any way.

digestion also means appreciating the good stuff and recognizing the good feelings you get too. so also ask if it's enriching you, helping you learn something new, giving you a new perspective, exposing you to something beautiful, passing the time, relaxing you, honing your focus, or generally lifting your mood.

2. cut

cut certain types of content from your life once you've decided they're not good for your media diet. block people. move on. tell youtube to stop reccomending that channel. block them. unfollow people. unfollow tags. block the tags. blacklist things. do it. forget the awful things that make your brain hurty. click the block button. uninstall the app. you know you want to

consider removing yourself entirely from websites that are designed to be attention predators. if you consistently feel like youre 'stuck' on a site and cant leave, it's probably best to just delete your account and get out of there. tiktok is NOTORIOUS for this.

i also tend to keep my following or subscribed count low. keeping the stream of content short forces me to find other things to do with my time. this goes hand in hand with things like turning off infinite scroll. it provides an 'end point' where the repetitive action of scrolling down stops bearing fruit, breaking the doomscrolling cycle. the internet is almost an infinite place, and its up to you to build walls around yourself so you arent lost in it forever.

its also important to get off the internet in general sometimes. i know this is obvious, but literally touch grass on occasion. doing anything with your physical body away from the screen will be more enriching than sitting there scrolling for hours. whether it's just a 5 minute walk around your house to stretch your legs or a 6 hour hike every weekend, part of cutting media will mean replacing it with real life. looking at some plants, doing a pushup, or working on a knitting project can be like rinsing your brain sponge under some cold, clean water.

3. curate

the flip side of cutting is curating. you'll want to be looking for media that makes you happy and feels productive or meaningful in some way. anything that not only doesnt make you feel like you wasted your time, but specifically makes you feel like you spent your time well, is a green flag.

keep in mind entertainment just for entertainment's sake is good for you too. you don't have to be watching university lectures and tutorials and stuff all day. finding high quality entertainment, such as personalities you enjoy, good production values, and inventive ideas can be really difficult. find the people who dont make you feel like a cocomelon baby and stick with them. from there you should be able to find similar content.

what's good for your soul is going to depend very much on you as an individual. this is also going to be an ongoing process as not only you but the internet both change and evolve. the important thing about this step is that you Make Decisions about what to consume. even bad decisions! it's all part of the process, and it's all about reclaiming your autonomy.

4. eat your junk food

this isn't a military drill or an exact science. i'm just a guy on tumblr with an intimate connection to his own brain and a LOT of time on the internet. that's my only credential. sometimes i want to turn that brain off and just mindlessly consume without putting any thought into what dirty dishwater is soaking into my sponge. sometimes adhd brain wants me to watch a shitty B movie in recap form so i dont have to commit to a full movie. sometimes i get stuck in the youtube shorts for like 3 hours.

that's fine. the most important part of any kind of self care is that a little bit is better than nothing. even just being aware that youre consuming something bad for you and knowing you arent ready to stop just yet is better than nothing.

thats it!!

now you should be prepared to take back some control over your media consumption. be gentle with yourself and take your time. eventually this stuff will become second nature, and you'll be effortlessly digesting, curating, and cutting media like it's just part of your personality. remember YOU have control over what the internet thinks you want to see. dont let it force feed you nasty slop anymore. let it be a reflection of your mind, not the other way around.

and good luck!

[crushedsweets]

Do you have any headcanons of Lyra and Toby’s relationship?

this has been in my inbox for like over a week by now because this is a big task in my head. i will focus more on the family itself, but obviously the siblings r there.

ROGERS FAMILY HCS UNDER THE CUT... tw for abuse and addiction, of course

ok. WE'RE GETTING PERSONAL HERE. im the eldest daughter of 3 so the way in which i project into older siblings is insane. ive also had an addict father(no where near like frank though let me clarify) so in general . . the story.. makes me feel very...... basically their relationship is very personal to me.

lyra is about 2-3 years older than toby.

frank's dad was in the vietnam war, his grandparents were in wwii, his grandparents in wwi, etc. so he went into military service right after marrying connie. for a long while, he was SUPER military strict. those kids were up, made their bed, and down for chores by 6am everyday. he made them do military time rather than civilian time. he was incredibly traditional, expected a perfectly clean household, a polite soft daughter, a strong bold son, perfect wife. he wanted the 1950s nuclear family model. so toby and lyra grew up in a very clean, strict, traditional household.

in my au, frank wasnt outright abusive until the kids were around 8-11. it was after he developed his addictions and lost his job. the kids really didnt understand what was changing at first, and legitimately were like 'omg dad isnt making us wake up at 5am everyday..... this is so cool'.

theyd start having sleepovers in eachothers room, slacking a bit on chores, going to sleep late, sleeping in. toby didnt develop his tourettes until he was around 7, so lyra and toby would walk home from their elementary school together. sometimes, theyd walk another friend home first, stop at convenience stores to get candy, pet a cat, etc. frank didnt say a thing for the first few months, just drunken grumbles along connies worried 'WHERE HAVE U BEEN'. if they weren't walking around the area, they were in the backyard playing soccer.

eventually the abuse began, and all of those little freedoms were quickly stripped from the kids.

toby developing tourrettes around this time was a painful coincidence, because not only did he experience abuse at home, but awful bullying at school. he was promptly pulled out after completing 3rd grade. he was only 8.

lyra would practically run home from school everyday, as fast as a 12 year old girl with a backpack could manage, just because she spent all 7 hours in school worrying about toby at home. connie had to start working to pay bills, so..

when toby was around 11 and lyra was around 13, toby started kinda just. being more distant. he was kind of a dick to lyra for a period of time, half because of everything he was going through, half because puberty is rough. his room started getting messy, lyra had to start picking up chores he was slacking on , etc. lyra isnt perfect and began to resent toby for this, and eventually, the two were kinda at eachothers throats for like 6 months. which isnt a lot, but for kids, its an eternity.

when franks abuse evolved from ''just'' verbal abuse, to shoves, to slaps, to full on beatings, toby started egging frank on. just to get him off of lyra and connie. obviously he couldnt feel it, and while it sure took a fucking mental toll, it was so much easier to just wait it out rather than listen to the girls cry.

lyra didnt even realize toby was doing this for a while, she just thought it was all part of him going through his little hormonal asshole phase, until one day frank made a fucked up comment about 'youre lucky that boy is always causing trouble. was supposed to be you'. then it kinda clicked and she very quickly tried to fix their relationship back to what it was.

frank eventually scared connie so badly that there'd be periods of time where she'd take the kids in the middle of the night, and run off to either her parents place, or even a random hotel in another city. she'd use cash, force the kids to keep their phones at home, leave literally everything behind and often make the kids pick out new toothbrushes at a random walmart. etc. it would only last a few days each time, and lyra fought so hard to stay strong while her mom cried and toby closed himself off.

she'd try to get toby to come to the hotel pools with her, try to get him to watch tv with her, try to get him to just fucking talk to her. he was often catatonic during these little runaways, once the confusion adrenaline and fear wore off

it wasnt until they went around a month without seeing their father, and frank had some weird fucking. 'those are MY kids too' thing and went to connie's parents house while all the adults were out, and forced the kids back home. this was the first time lyra was full on sobbing and begging and pleading in years. that was what shifted something in toby, too.

now tobys 13, lyras 15, and theyre on better footing. theyre starting to understand eachother. tobys back on keeping up with chores, knowing that either him lyra or connie was going to get beat if they were missed. sometimes he'd just silently come into lyras room and lay down and watch tv with her. they'd talk about books, about school, their trust was built right back up and toby ended up being the first to know about lyras school drama, gossip, boys, etc.

toby wasn't really socialized properly, since he's been homeschooled for 6 years by now. all the time, he'd hear lyras stories, and wish he could go to school. his mom would be horrified anytime toby asked, because all she could remember was her sweet boy coming home and crying into her arms after a day of being mocked and pushed around by peers.

so he began to live through lyra, in a sense ? he almost became a diary for lyra, and he kinda loved it. she was like a sitcom to him.

frank wasnt a good father by any means during this period, he was still awful, but he wasn't constantly looking for trouble. the kids kept to themselves, connie did everything she was expected to, he didnt give a shit about their grades or social lives. he couldn't even recgonize when lyra was coming home late.

lyra got her license the second she turned 16. the house had two cars, and its not like frank was ever going anywhere, so she was always going everywhere. she adored the freedom, and took toby wherever he'd let her. he only really left the house if he was going grocery shopping with his mom or something, so it was kinda weird now that he was just. going to malls. going to restaurants. going to parks. just Hanging Out. every now and again he'd stick around when Lyra was with her friends, but he didn't like them so it was rare.

sometimes theyd just drive together for a long time. at night, she was the one to take him to every hospital visit, she even got him to volunteer at a pet shelter she worked at for a bit. 3 years and they become so close again, and lyra is tobys best friend. she's his entire world because who else does he have ? he loves his mom, but she's married to the man he hates more than anything

toby was 16 and lyra was 18 when frank strangled toby till he passed out. thats finally when connie kicked frank out, forcing frank to go live on his moms couch. lyra was mortified and started spending an absurd amount of time with toby. she took online community college courses just so she could spend even more time with toby, and it didnt hurt to do so since frank wasnt there anymore. things were getting better for the family, frank was gone, lyra was in college, connie was working, toby was volunteering at shelters and even had a few acquaintances he'd talk to now and again.

lyra picked toby up from the shelter he volunteered at when the accident happened.

lyra and connie had matching silver necklaces with a circle pendant that had their initials. toby didnt cuz frank would get pissed if toby tried wearing jewelry, but when lyra died, toby immediately clung to it. he wears it religiously. the only time he takes it off is if he knows he's going to kill someone that day. otherwise, its always on him.

lyra died and was buried in colorado. toby lives in alabama now. so he really doesnt visit her grave often. only on her birthday, he'll scramble together some money and get brian, tim, and kate to agree to cover his uh. 'shifts' with slenderman, and take a few loooonnnggg train rides over to colorado.

he'll leave two bouquets of flowers. one for lyra, one for connie.

connie just feels in her heart that its toby. she has no reason to believe it, they've never bumped into eachother (toby's visiting at like 2am and falls asleep near the grave for a few hours), but she knows nobody else whos visiting lyras grave and leaving two sets of the same flowers.

toby and lyras childhood home was put on sale shortly after it was reconstructed from the fire, and connie moved in with her sister. lyras bedroom door was the only one that was shut and left unscathed after the fire (legitimately keep your doors shut if you ever have a housefire it can save entire bedrooms and even lives). the rest of the house was ruined, but not lyras room. connie kept every single one of her belongings, but she's put some photos out on the grave. tobys taken them, and connie believes it was him. again, she has no reason to believe it other than the flowers and 'why would someone take a photo of my dead daughter.'

anyway hi. in tears. i love them. sorry. i just retell their story over and over and get sad everytime

[rodolfoparras]

So yesterday marks the very first time I’ve posted a fic on here

I had written fics before but this was my first ever 18+ fic

Before I started writing for the cod fandom I had stuck to reading cod fics on ao3 specifically price pieces and I rmr one day wanting to read a fic where price teaches reader how to smoke cigars but I just knew there wasn’t an x male reader piece around so I decided to write it myself

I spent a month researching how to write smut trying to get a proper feel of price’s character and translate those very same traits into my own fic

And when I was completely done with it I almost didn’t post it but I did and I believe in one day I got 200 notes which was insane. I didn’t know how active people were on tumblr I really just wanted to create a price piece and do what I love which is writing

The next piece took 3 weeks before I posted it mostly because I was picking and poking at it but then I told myself you know if I’m going to be running a writing blog I have to write more often

So I pushed myself to write more often and back then I had just started to become fixated with price so I had plenty of ideas at hand

Slowly but surely I started to post more and more pieces and my blog started to grow. From April to maybe June month I had gotten two requests and maybe one ask where it was an anon who was just interested in talking to me and I rmr feeling over the moon about it

And then June month I started to grow rapidly like I really was there like whats going on 🧍🏻 i rmr the writers i looked up to became mutuals with me and i genuinely couldnt believe this was happening.

june- september i felt myself become more confident in my writing and i started to write like every 2-3 days and that’s when so many of you guys joined my blog and i rmr just being surprised that so many of you wanted to talk to me and that i went from one anonie to having a little council of yall

then november - February came around and that period is usually the worst for my mental l health but writing and having you guys show so much love not only for my work but also and it genuinely helped me so much

now its been a year of writing fics and im just really appreciative

also its so cool to be able to see how much ive grown how i went from spending a month on writing a fic to being able to produce pieces im actually proud of in the span of 3 days it's also fun to see how much knowledge ive gained by just writing like ill find myself reading pieces and im able to see minimal adjustment i can make that while make the scene flow whiles before id be questioning my grammar in every sentence

so what i want to say with this yapping is thank you guys and if youre someone who wants to get into ff writing pls do so

at first you'll feel like a weed in a garden but as times goes on you’ll realize how much you and your work has made the garden bloom🫶🏻

[coldgoldlazarus]

I know the metroid timeline is purposely pretty vague, but do you have a headcanon for how long it's been since metroid 1? I figure it has to be at least a few years, even in the games themselves don't take place over a long period of time each

I think my initial off-the-cuff guesstimate would be somewhere in the vicinity of eight to ten years, with Samus in Zero Mission being in her mid twenties, and in her early-mid thirties as of Dread. Wanna double-check what little canon info there is later to make sure there aren't any glaring contradictions, and it's hard to say how Prime 4 may alter things or not, but here's my rough guesses about the timeskips between games.

Zero Mission to Prime - A couple years, enough time for the escaped frigate Orpheon to set up shop on Tallon IV before Samus comes calling. For simplicity, let's round to an even number; my instinct would be to say two years, but apparently one source says it is actually three. I'll split the difference and say 2 Years, 6 Months.

Prime to Hunters - A couple months at most, mainly because I'm pretty sure it was said explicitly somewhere that Prime and Echoes were six months apart. 2 Years, 8 Months

Hunters to Echoes - A few months, probably a slightly bigger space on this end of Hunters, but still not too long, in keeping with the aformentioned six-month gap. 3 Years.

Echoes to Corruption - Approximately a year, give or take, allowing for Urtraghus's near-complete seed conversion (unimpeded compared to Tallon IV) and creation of Urtraghan Pirate Phazon Cult, along with the other logistics groundwork laid for their massive attacks seen in the game. 4 Years.

Corruption to Federation Force - Merely a few months, as Samus would still have to have been recovering from her phazon corruption for the pirates to have feasibly captured her, and for the Federation to switch gears from their now-useless PED technology to Project Golem. (Meanwhile, I hold the headcanon that the Pirates are quite vast and decentralized compared to what the games claim/imply, thus the Urtraghan Phazon Cult was not representative of the entirety of the Pirates, and the Doomseye crew were a completely different branch who had been setting up seperately from the Urtraghans during the same time period, and were unaffected by their fall.) For rounding purposes, let's say that's four months, putting us at 4 Years, 4 Months.

Federation Force to Samus Returns - This space is the big unknown variable, especially given this is most likely where Prime 4 will fall, and we don't yet know whether it will ultimately be a one-off or start a brand new trilogy or what. But for now, assuming only Prime 4 goes in this space, I'll give it something like a round two years, with P4 happening closer to the back end of that, to lead fairly directly into Samus Returns with only a few months between them, with whatever incident occurs there finally spurring the Federation to order the Metroid extermination. But if they do wedge in even more games after Prime 4, I would stretch this section out to three or more years. But for now, 6 Years, 4 Months.

Samus Returns to Super - I detailed in another post that while I originally agreed with the general consensus that Super follows extremely closely off of SR, I have since changed my mind. Even though I have my issues with the forced inclusion of Proteus Ridley and the general tonal mishandling of Metroid II's ending, if we are to aknowledge that that event occurred, I feel like Super must make far more sense with some temporal distance between it and SR. Ergo, I posit that rather than them being a week apart at most as popular consenus goes, there must be a minimum of four months between them. Enough time for Ridley's attack to be written off as a fluke, and somewhere in that time Samus and the hatchling Metroid embarked on an adventure that convinced her it was unsafe at her side - either in too much danger, or too much of a danger to others, or both, thus prompting her to bring it to Ceres Station, kicking off the events of Super. So going with that conservative estimate of four months, that puts us at 6 Years, 8 Months.

Super to Fusion - (I am of course just not aknowledging Other M in this timeline. Fed Force is overhated IMO, but I don't have enough patience for OM.) Given that enough time must have passed between Samus Returns and Fusion for the Biologic Space Laboratories asteroid space station to have been set up around SR388 and brought into operation for the habitats to be filled, but the X parasite propogation on said planet only reached the station shortly before Fusion begins, I would guess about a year or so passed, with the bulk of that time being spent simply building the station before operations proper began only a month or two out from Fusion's opening. But that's relative to Samus Returns; relative to Super I would estimate that gap to be somewhere around eight months, bringing our total up to 7 Years, 4 Months.

Fusion to Dread - This is another kind of weird one given how Dread just has Samus working with the Federation again, even if presumably on rockier terms than before. There must have been at least a solid couple-month stretch of initially dealing with the fallout of Fusion, then things settle back into an uneasy status quo, before the transmission comes that sets off this newest adventure. At the same time, not too much of a long stretch, given Samus still has the Federation-loaned purple Gunship and her new/old AI friend. So another eight-month stretch there puts us at 8 Years.

If I say Samus is like, 24 in Zero Mission, (given it seems she was in her early 20s when she was with the Federation, and had already been a bounty hunter of good repute for a couple years as of ZM) then that puts her at roughly 32 (or 33 or 34 if I do stretch out the period between FF and SR) in Dread, which just feels right to me. These are of course all rounded to exact numbers, I imagine the actual stretches of time to be a bit more uneven, but still amounting to this overall length.

[moonlightpirate]

At this rate I can't wait for the end of my shift tomorrow so I can call my doctor and maybe start getting some answers no matter what they are

[djservo]

crashes in in a fashionably late kind of way.. january is finally over!! 31 days felt like 300 but now that we’re on the other side of it, what books did you read to start 2024? what was the vibe any standouts has it changed what’s on the horizon?

I've started keeping a physical calendar again so you'd think having the month splayed out in front of me so directly and constantly would be grounding but week after week I was just like Omg how is there More.... we made it thru tho god bless xx January was fun!!

in terms of my pre-planned monthly reading themes, January was a grace period where I let my whims guide me so I'm surprised at how many themes incidentally overlapped?? Naomi Klein referencing The Fire Next Time, the theme of internet doubles and online dark corners in Doppelganger essentially being the core of The Sluts, the dark spiraling mystery of The Sluts akin to the dark spiraling mystery of Mysterious Skin, yada yada yada. I luv when the dots inadvertently connect!! right place right time vibe!!

The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin

it's been really nice starting my reading off with Baldwin these past few years, something grounding about immersing myself in sharp indictments of the US amidst the usual new year wide-eyed blitheness. this one was only 2 essays but both gripped me just as much as his longer collections. I imagine it's hard to sort of reframe arguments, pleas, and points you've been talking about for years when things still haven't changed, but each new (to me) Baldwin essay reads so fresh in the way that he contextualizes these core points within different interactions + relationships. I think Ive said this before but it's also so rewarding to read an author's works chronologically because you can kind of follow how their frame of mind sharpens/adapts throughout the years and in a way you grow with them, and his first essay (a letter to his nephew) kinda feels like the culmination of that growth laid out with such care. super special

Doppelganger by Naomi Klein

totallyyyyyy consumed + dizzied by this wow I can't believe it took me this long to read Naomi Klein. I think I'd been intimidated by the size of her books + my incorrect assumption that something so research-heavy (bc boy does she research!) will read too dense, but everything here was laid out and tied together so smoothly + accessibly (I feel like I use that word a lot for nonfiction which is probably my subconscious quest to entice ppl to read more nonfiction hehe) This read like partial investigative deep dive into the online world of conspiracy theories/Qanon cesspools + partial mystery novel about her own experience with Naomi Wolf (her 'doppelganger')?? idk it feels weird to relate someone's lived experience to a spectacle like that but it really was like edge of seat level curiosity/uncertainty/etc. just so engrossing and thorough and THRILLING, the epilogue made me gasp!!!

Leslie F*cking Jones by Leslie Jones

my one + only spotify audiobook experience, cut short amid the last chapter bc I ran out of hours and no longer am a spotify premium user so I just read the rest </3 but that turned out to be fun bc I saw what a stark difference it was to listen vs. read this. the audio rules bc Leslie totally goes off script to add anecdotes (one of the reviews was like 'she was NOT reading what was written!!' LMAO so true.. and I love her for that!!) + an emotional depth I don't think could've been sufficiently captured in written form - her laughter and her palpable anger and her literally crying over... such a robust journey! I was an SNL fan basically my whole life til I went to college so I always love stories about it and I really admire how she didn't hold back in her criticisms. I feel like former members (especially those somewhat fresh off the slab in a way) feel like they have to be eternally grateful to their experience when so much of it is so clearly draining and thankless. doubled expectations because she's a woman, tripled because she's a Black woman, and therefore expected to just bend over and take it (her words) but she never does!! she never tries to compromise her own experiences like "this happened... but at least this happened too and they actually were nice in this way-" NO!! she compartmentalizes the good and the bad so distinctly so there's no misunderstanding, and I just really really admire that, the lack of kissing ass in an industry where that's practically what fuels your career/reputation!! she rocks + is such a funny storyteller+ I'm so glad I listened to this

The Sluts by Dennis Cooper

ofc had to squeeze my old man in... I think this was actually the book to first put Cooper on my radar so it was super fulfilling to finally get to it (even tho I devoured it in just 2 days.. a shame bc it was a slay to read this in public) Supremely up my alley with its 2000s internet mystique, the perfect backdrop for a twisted mystery + ruminations of Internet As Performance Art™, the internet as roleplay, what's real + what's just fantasy/fetish, etc etc. so so so good and while still sick and horrifying as his writing is known for, perhaps the most readable for an uninitiated reader of Cooper's works?? even then I'd say this is still for a very particular reader tho idk i can never get a pulse on what a majority of readers are into these days!! I really loved this though and I'm sure it'll be in my top 5 for the year thank u once again for the twisted ride denny !!!

My People Shall Live by Leila Khaled, George Hajjar

feels more like political ethnography than personal memoir. there is some of Leila's backstory and family and personal relationships sprinkled in (her husband is given maybe 5 lines total LOL), but so much of her being is clearly centered around Palestinian resistance + revolution, so recounting her political work within a collective was her truest form of autobiography as that was indeed her life/livelihood. wild to read how intense she was even from childhood, how Down she was to sacrifice things and put herself on the line... literally getting plastic surgery after hijacking a plane in order to be able to get involved in more demonstrations without being recognized like god!!! intense life-altering decisions and it's like she doesn't even bat an eye or show any regrets/wistful 'what if i hard a 'normal' life?'!! that eric andre margaret thatcher meme but instead "do you think leila khaled effectively utilized girl power by hijacking a plane?'' LOL I mean... ! 🤭

The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov

SILLY + ABSURD!!! a bit of a hike to get there but once I hit it, it was hard to put this down (as is my experience with a lot of classics, I find) I think I really enjoy magical realism rooted in political/cultural landscapes, or maybe I just really like wacky shit (it made me think a bit of Catch-22 which I also had fun with!!) + this didn't disappoint!! truly giggled aloud at some parts, the ridiculousness of it all!!! makes me wanna deep dive into the history of the Soviet Union but I feel like I'll need to clear at least an entire month for that .... will have to plan accordingly 👩‍🔬

Mysterious Skin by Scott Heim

heartbreaking and dark but handled with a lot of care. I guessed the "twist" (which feels indelicate to call it that but I cant think of another word rn) early on but I think that just heightened the slow unraveling of it + made it that much more emotionally grueling to get thru. perhaps that was even the point! I'd been meaning to watch the movie for like over a decade at this point but wanted to read it first so now having read and watched it I'm glad it was now vs. me at 10 or whenever bc dumb tween me likely wouldn't have processed it well enough and the darkness would've overshadowed the journey itself. sometimes it's important to wait I guess is what I'm trying to say!!!

I definitely want to squeeze in another Naomi Klein this year if possible, maybe some Russian/Ukrainian lit. I've focused on Baldwin's nonfiction these past years so I might pick up a fiction of his this month + ofc Cooper wherever I can squeeze him <3

[libra-stellium]

Saturn conjunct Ascendant

As a 14 degree Pisces rising this was March 12, 2024 to May 8, 2024.

"Bitch wtf is going on????" - me the entire 57 days and it's coming back around in early 2025

Notes from Saturn in Transit - Erin Sullivan

Saturn over the ascendant can be experienced as an extremely dramatic shift from "who you used to be" to "who you will be" but with a rather traumatic period of uncertainty while the no longer useful persona is sloughed off

It’s been a weird timeeeeeee like there’s some things i'm like so excited about that are a “new me” and then there’s some other stuff I’m like 💀💀💀 about and I’m gonna pretend like nothing is happening for a while longer bc this feels like too much change at once 🥲 maybe in 2025 lol my mind has been going nonstop!

The thresholding that is experienced during this time can be a shock to someone who has strongly identified with or has been identified with a particular and definite image

lol I literally introduced myself as an astrologer to someone the other day bc they mentioned astro and me being an attorney never came up and it honestly felt nice 😩 yeah my entire schooling revolved around becoming an attorney but like it doesn’t "feel" like I succeeded at it lmfao and I’m honestly not putting a lot of effort into making it feel like success either so 🙃

Understanding this necessary loss of personal identification greatly reduces stress and allows a more conscious transition into the new self image. The struggle is all about coming to terms with unconscious material in the conscious mind and vice versa

I think so much is happening in my unconscious mind bc I usually remember most of my dreams in complete detail and the last two weeks at least I know I’ve had very longgg detailed dreams but when I wake up I can’t remember it in the part of my brain that can say it into words lol I feel like I’m missing out on messages!

Saturn brings to the ascendant all the manifest experiences and control issues that have dominated the last 14 year extraverted cycle during which the individual learned how to be present and accountable in the conscious world or accomplishments, deeds, and collective goals

"I'm giving myself goals because I don't know what to do with myself if I'm not accomplishing anything." - Me in 2021 a year after getting my law degree lol I feel like it encompasses this whole thing! During this transit I wrote a list of personal goals and they're not outward things like graduation they're more like be consistent with skin care lol the other day I told my aunt I just relaxed and I didn't do anything and she was like if you're so boring why don't you go on a walk and i was like??? I didn't say that?? lol made me not want to say anything else!!

Symbolic of a descent into oneself

When I first read this I was like oooh seems zen 🧘🏾‍♀️ IT WAS NOT ZEN IVE BEEN IN THE TRENCHES!! It feels like too much pressure to know and be like "this is who I am" i just want to be a pisces rising whose personality changes whenever

Notes from Planets in Transit - Robert Hand

You will try to eliminate everything in your life that is not necessary to fulfilling responsibilities

I didn’t do many things just for fun during this time everything had a purpose. I did finish reading two books unfinished from last year and it was in an attempt to spend less time watching videos which worked!

You will become more complex and simpler at the same time

Idkkkk I’m not sure I understand what this even means

You are finishing up tasks going into a 5-8 year period of relatively quiet preparation for a new beginning

I feel like I’ll see this more in 2025 bc right now I don’t really have anything started that needed to be finished lol

You may have less freedom of movement than usual because of the pressure of circumstances and the need to get things done

A week into this I made happy hour plans and I was going to leave work extra early bc I had nothing to do and I got an assignment literally 2 hours before I was going to go! I did finish in 2 hours and went to HH but it was stressful lol

You may have to exert more effort at work in order to get the job done

For real the last month I actually had so much more work at work than usual I was working a full 8 hour day sometimes 😭 usually I have like maybe 8 hours of work a week!

Your superiors may give you even more responsibility than you would choose to have

Facts! The last few days I’ve been essentially training this girl at work and the last day of this transit I finished lol seemed fitting

Do not start out on a completely new project because in a few years you may find that you do not have the material or psychological resources to complete it

This makes me feel like it should be about something big 😂 I have not started any projects lol I did apply to a few jobs but none of them even responded to reject me so that was also unintentionally not started

Good relationships will not suffer but bad ones will break up completely

I feel like Saturn in aqua in my 12H took care of most of the bad relationships already lol so this was fine

You are withdrawing from everything in your life that is in the way of your development during the next few years

Yeah I’ve been more annoyed than usual at people around me who are making the choice to struggle just bc they don’t want to try something new 😩 it’s been making me feel like I can’t be as close to them like it’s contagious 😂

Avoid building a wall between yourself and others because they are important to you now that you are excluding those who do not belong

Yes I’ve been making it a point to actually say yes to events lol but it's hard to keep in contact with people for some reason! I forget to or think that less time has passed and then I check messages and it's been weeks!

This is a productive time

I did get a lot done! I cooked a lot of meals, I washed all my bedding that’s been sitting there since end of last year, I cleaned my fish tank, I cleaned the mildew off my bathroom walls, I put a lot of my clothes away, my recycling pile is way down, I built a storage shelf thing for under my desk, I sewed a skirt, I read and wrote a lot

Follow through on the tasks that need to be done and get your life in shape for the next phase of preparation

I’ve been intentional about this! I made a list of things I want to get out of my saturn return in my 1H and one of those things is clear skin so I’ve been consistent with the routine like actually tracking it on the calendar! Losing weight was another on that list and the last two months I was just focusing on food like getting back into cooking and the last almost 3 weeks I’ve been tracking all my food and even using a food scale. On the last day of this transit I signed up for the gym!

Overall I would give this transit 6/10 😂 the mental anguish was toooo much Omggg I hope it’s easier in 2025 and after that I’m glad I don’t have to deal with this for another 30 years

[jazz-bazz]

@jesusbutbetterrr‘s Ghoulettes Weeks 2024! Week 2 : Stealing clothes & Period stuff

i think this ended up more borrowing than stealing? im basing this on my sister and i arguing about clothes

also im kinda reducing my time on tumblr bcs reports and exams 😭 so imma sometimes go poof a bit, but i’ll try my best to finish ghoulettes weeks!

i tried writing but my brain has been mush this past week 😭 plus ive been sick since wednesday so im sleeping a lot (or maybe thats because of the mush brain… who knows)

The ghoul dens that afternoon were a chaos, the ghoulettes were going on a girls only trip the next day, and they were packing. And if you're like me when packing, there's gonna be clothes every-fucking-where. Not helped that the ghoulettes were going to a concert too, and need a rawkin' outfit, of course.

"Has anyone seen my scarf? I need it for the trip," Mist shouted from her room.

"Scarf? You mean this thin scarf? Is this yours?" Cumulus replied, going out of her room into the hallway, a scarf dangling from her fingers.

"Yes! Thank you Lu!" Mist took the scarf with a kiss to Cumulus' cheek.

"Aw... I was planning to wear it, how did it end up in my room anyway?"

"I think it's from last time we piled there after going to the bar? Maybe it fell or something, I don't know, I was pretty tipsy then. Anyway, you have your outfit and makeup planned for the concert?"

"Mostly yeah, but I still want to rummage in Rora's room for some accessories, how about you?"

"I'm gonna ask Cirrus for a cute top and then borrow those boots from Rain that I've been eyeing, but otherwise I'm done packing."

"Whoa, I just finished picking outfit and still need to pack everything," Cumulus said with a laugh.

"I'll leave you to it then, gonna bother Rainy for the boots, bye Lu!"

"Bye Mist!"

On her way to Rain's room, Mist met Aurora, apparently also headed to Rain's room. But instead of Rain, Dewdrop was the one opening the door when they knocked on Rain's door, "Hello ladies, what can I help you with?"

"Hey, Dew. Is Rain here?" Aurora asked.

"They're in the shower now, but probably only for a couple more minutes, they've been in there since half an hour ago. Would you beautifuls like to come in?" He said while opening the door wider.

Rain's room was beautiful, light blue walls with a darker blue ceiling painted with sea lives, and when it's dark, some of the fishes would light up, and also the corals along the bottom edge of the walls, very relaxing. Mist and Aurora sat on the couch while Dewdrop got on the bed to wait for Rain.

"I thought you guys are packing for your trip?" Dew asked.

"Yeah, but you know we're going to that concert while on the trip? So we need clothes, and you know those pretty boots Rain has? I want to ask them if I can borrow that for the trip, but I'm almost done packing," Mist answered him.

"I'm almost done too, just wanna see if I can borrow one of Rain's dresses, if not then maybe I'll ask Cirrus."

"I'm sure they'll let you borrow them if they're not planning to wear it while you guys are gone."

Just then the door to the bathroom was opened and Rain stepped out with their hair wrapped in a towel, "Hi girls, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Hey Rainy, Mist and I were wondering if we could borrow some of your things for the concert, Mist said she wants your boots, and I want one of your dresses."

"Oh sure! The boots are over there, Mist, you can take them. And Rora, which dress do you want?"

"Thanks Rain! I'll return them back squeaky clean after we get back. Rora, I'm gonna finish packing and bother Cirrus, alright? Oh and Cumulus said she wants to ask you for some accessories later."

"Bye Mist! Thanks for the info," Aurora waved.

"Cirrus was just here before I showered asking me for a skirt, and now you two. What am I, a clothing store?" Rain said with a laugh, "Anyway you can take a look in my closet and pick the dress you want, Rora."

"Not their fault your closet basically is a store, babe," Dew replied.

"Well you also keep buying me new ones, Dew. And not my fault those clothes look good and I need them," Rain said with a little pout.

"Because you look good in them! And I like seeing you look good."

"Okay lovebirds, cut it out," apparently Aurora was done picking out her dress and showed it to Rain, who approved, "I'm gonna finish packing, you guys. And thanks again Rainy!"

On her way back to her room, Aurora met Sunshine, who asked her for permission to pillage in her closet for some clothes, "I've asked everyone else but I still lack some kind of pants or skirt or whatever, so you're my next target!"

"No problem, come on in, Sunny," Aurora said upon reaching her room, "What do you need?"

"I've got this crop top from Cirrus, this bandana for my hair from Lus, and this cardigan if it's windy from Mist, and I have a pair of cute socks to wear with this, so I just need pants, any ideas?"

"I have just the thing!" Aurora rushed to her drawers and dug around for who knows what. Then someone knocked on the door, "Hey Rora, can Cirrus and I come in?" They heard Cumulus say.

"Sure! Just give me a minute to look for my shorts somewhere around here, I just washed it a couple days ago."

"Oh hey Sunny! Still pillaging around for your outfit?" Cirrus asked.

"Yep, this is the last one I need then I can start packing my things!"

“Nice! You guys excited for the trip?”

“Hell yeah I am!” Aurora shouted while still looking for her shorts, with the other ghoulettes echoing her enthusiasm.

“Finally! Here Sunny, you can have these,” Aurora handed Sunny the thing she was looking for, “Oh yeah, Lus, Mist said you wanna borrow some accessories?”

“Yes, that’s actually while I’m here. Cirrus was done so she comes with to help me pick.”

“Go wild then, I’ve already picked mine so you can take whatever catches your eyes.”

————

this is actually more peaceful than when i was packing for a 10 days trip with my family, not helped by the fact that my sister, my mom, and i all wear the same size (except for jeans though) and the fact that i didnt bring much clothes home so i gotta borrow their things a lot, and that my sister and i kinda have similar styles so we argued a lot 😂

[nataliewrites]

April showers bring May flowers but around here April just brings more pain. 

April fools! Its 29/4 but guess who turned out to be the biggest fool? 

spoiler alert, me!

You surely have noticed many people having favorite and lucky numbers of 2 , 3 , 7 or even 11 but as a kid i couldn’t help but notice that somehow I’ve always been associated with the number 4 (which later on will be described as my cursed number and YOU will see why), It bothered me SO much for some sorta weird reason that i felt like it’s a sign for bad thing, I just HATED the goddamn number and i didn’t even know why. For example, l’m the 4th granddaughter from the oldest to youngest, my family consists of 4 members, ive sat in the 4th disk away from the board in elementary and middle school and ive meet my lifetime best friends in the 4th grade. Now pay attention as you’ll see this taking an absurd turn where you start overthinking your whole life as a kid, if we subtract our apartment floor from my grandparents’ apartment floor 11-7 = 4, the addition of my birth day numbers 3+1 = 4, the subtraction of my birth year numbers 6-0-0-2 = 4 and uk the silly tiktoks that gives you a number for whatever reason? It ALWAYS was a 4.

As i grew older, i never gave it much thought until ive met my beloved month of the year, April🫶🏻

Oh April, the month during which i spent and initiated the most painful moments and heart-wrenching relationships (with guys mostly) of my whole life. Today (more accurately tomorrow) marks the end of you, and believe me i ended it with a one good of a cry that I vomited :>

And for the special moment of it ending, let me recall the memorable events engraved in my heart that have taken place during this month.

*wild drums* 3rdddd of april marks the birthday of my ex! really what a fresh start, and the very next day that same ex first texted me privately, mad at me for befriending the most 2 popular guys of my high school (sounds insane out of context lol). Next! I had the best moments with three of my ex-guy bestfriends, one of which turned out to be THE “enemy” to most of my guy friends currently and the other two did me SO FUCKING dirty that i won’t forgive them for it until the end of time. Regarding these two, I spent the first few days of the month living the worst week (seriously whom I kidding the rest of my life) in fear, high blood pressures and sudden panic attacks, luckily for me tho god came to the rescue as always and I’ve met my soulmate who got me out of the troubles I made with my own consequences, thanks to him i am who i am today<3 Moving on, I also first met the first true love of my life and ex of 1 year :/ (i really miss you). Lastly, concerning my bestie best guy best of best friends, it marks your birthday on the 16th of April that I’ve celebrated with you(?) for the first time this year.. YAY 18th HAPPY BIRTHDAY :3 and whom i cant even talk to properly anymore :( 

I also just got to 400 songs on my playlist! And found out that there’s only a period of 4 days between the day on which I fell in love with the loml and the day that changed everything thereafter between us.

Moral is: shit happens and although I got to live through the miserable month over the past 2 years, I’m still quite excited (terrified) to see what it holds for me in the future, and owing to it, I’ve grown into the person I am today. Looking back, I could finally wrap my head around what my younger self had of what I like to explain as a vision of awful stuff happening to us associated with the number 4. 

[newhologram]

In 2022, I had an estimated 129 medical appointments. Many times I had 5 appts a week, 3 in a day even.

Here is some of the necessary care I fought for all year but still can’t access:

❌ Surgery to address upper cervical instability and 2 bulging discs in my neck ❌ Physical therapy to address my thoracic pain (it took 13 months to get an MRI) and being unable to sit up for long, as well as for my right arm nerve abnormality. Every referral for PT was over an hour away. I can't sit up to drive that long anymore. They can send the disabled shuttle to pick me up, but that's actually even longer sitting up so it's not helpful. ❌ IV ketamine to manage my depression, C-PTSD, autoimmune disorders, and chronic pain (ended up going with at-home ketamine thanks to GFM donations, but IV would be better distribution for inflammation/pain) ❌An updated sleep study since it’s been nearly 10 years since my type 2 narcolepsy diagnosis and some of my other symptoms such as frequent painful myoclonus and choking in my sleep are now making it even harder to get consistent shut-eye ❌Disability benefits and Medicare as I’m now officially considered a “complex” case and have been dropped by doctors who didn't feel they could help me ❌Endometriosis excision surgery + getting my blood-filled ovarian cyst (red thing in photo) dealt with. After several months of going to multiple specialists to rule out other things, including cancer (being monitored for lymphoma/leukemia now), I was sent to a gynecological oncologist surgeon who does the complete wrong outdated terrible no good surgery. She wanted to just do a full hysterectomy and ablation of endo lesions. ❌An updated 1 year colonoscopy after my disastrous 2021 ulcerative colitis/endometriosis flare up that landed me in the hospital. My mesorectal lymph nodes are a little enlarged and there’s a mysterious lesion in my colon, which is why they sent me to a cancer doctor for bloodwork and PET scan—but I strongly believe it’s just endometriosis invading my bowels, which is why I need the endo surgery so bad as well. I'm at the point where my colon will completely go on strike and the pain from the constipation is ER-level (especially when my period from hell comes). It's also just dangerous. I've never had this problem so intensely before, so I'm being even more careful with food and supplements. ❌Pelvic floor physical therapy to help with debilitating pelvic pain caused by endometriosis and other things ❌ A pain management doctor who can prescribe me Tramadol, which helps keep me out of the ER every month, and that has minimal side effects. Something I’ve taken safely for 6 years with no complications. Instead, they'll only Rx Suboxone, which makes it hard to function and has side effects that can cause colitis or narcolepsy complications. I have to take 1/8 of a dose and I still pay for it later.

I had so many arguments with doctors to correct them when they brought up the wrong treatment, wrong surgery, etc. Not only did some of them already know it was bullshit, but others wouldn’t even try to have an open enough mind to keep learning past medical school.

This year was a lot of disappointment and frustration. I feel so worn down. This kind of medical trauma erodes hope and optimism. When intuition about our own bodies and the hours we put into research means nothing to medical professionals or insurance, it feels like we're at the end of the road. I wouldn’t wish the necessity for this kind of resilience on anyone. I wouldn’t have been able to withstand this year without the ketamine therapy or support from friends and followers. I cannot express what it means to have that, especially when I'm still pretty isolated day-to-day. To manage things on my own, I paid out of pocket for acupuncture, cryotherapy, red light therapy, ketamine, many new supplements, all kinds of new massage/trigger point/gua sha/acupressure tools. I went hard on a self-care/pain mgmt routine that I’m proud of, but I’m still very much disabled by persistent, impenetrable chronic pain/fatigue. I was thankfully able to get some prescriptions that help with flare ups, such as Xanax and Toradol. This is one of my many blessings in 2022. My fight is far from over but I want to go into 2023 with softness.

No more pushing through 16 appts per month while also forcing myself to constantly record and edit new content. I want to recline my floor chair and rest my back while I focus on editing older stuff. I have no idea how long it will take to get through my backlog of projects but I’m going to be putting certain things on hiatus so I can just take it slow.

If you enjoy any of my content at all, please share it and consider donating. Your support helps me afford my supplements and medication to keep managing my symptoms even when I'm not able to work that much. GoFundMe: Help New get relief from chronic pain & illness Ko-Fi: Make a micro-donation (name in YouTube endscreen!) Patreon: Monthly support and access to Hologram Discord server (name in YouTube endscreen!) Thank you for helping me be strong this year, Holograms. I love you all very much.

[thetorturedpoetheadquarters]

Fortnight Title Analysis

Definition: a period of 14 days, two weeks In astronomy, a lunar fortnight is half a synodic month, which is equal to the period between a full moon and a new moon

Similar Lyrics:

"We met a few weeks ago, now you try on calling me ‘baby’ like trying on clothes" - King of My Heart

"One night, a few moons ago, I saw flecks of what could have been lights" - Snow on The Beach (ft. Lana Del Rey)

"I counted days, I counted miles, to see you there" - Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince

Shakespeare mentioned the word fortnight a handful of times throughout multiple works. These works include:

Coriolanus

Henry IV Part 1

Henry IV Part 2

King Edward III

King Lear

The Merchant of Venice

The Merry Wives of Windsor

A Midsummer Night's Dream

Richard III

Romeo and Juliet

Here are the plays (and excerpts) I feel like are the most important when discussing Taylor and THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT.

Coriolanus:

Synopsis: "As Coriolanus begins, two Roman patricians, Menenius and Martius, calm a revolt by the city’s famished plebians. Martius, who despises the plebians, announces that their petition to be represented by tribunes has been granted. When Volscian invaders attack Roman territories, Martius helps lead the Roman forces, and almost single-handedly conquers the Volscian city of Corioles, winning the name “Coriolanus.” The Volscian leader, Aufidius, swears revenge. Victorious in battle, Coriolanus expects to be made a consul, but by custom he must ask for votes from the plebians. He does this so contemptuously that he is rejected as a consul. The tribunes later charge Coriolanus with treason and banish him from Rome. He seeks his former enemy, Aufidius. Coriolanus and Aufidius join forces to conquer Rome. On the brink of success, Coriolanus is persuaded by his mother, Volumnia, to spare the city, though he knows it may cost him his life. Aufidius and his fellow conspirators plot Coriolanus’s death. Coriolanus returns to Corioles, where he is assassinated. Rome honors Volumnia for saving the city."

Our business is not unknown to th’ Senate. They have had inkling this fortnight what we intend to do, which now we’ll show ’em in deeds. They say poor suitors have strong breaths; they shall know we have strong arms too.

With each of the plays I have looked over and chosen to speak more about in this post they each give off the energy of the five stages of grief - a TTPD theory that Taylor herself has acknowledged and made Apple Music playlists for. Coriolanus is very reminiscent of the second stage, anger. The aggression, the need for revenge and control is something Taylor has discussed in her writing before and probably will discuss again on this new album. This topic was most discussed on reputation, which also happens to be the first album to have Joe Alwyn as a muse. Also, Coriolanus being persuaded by his mother is similar to Now That We Don't Talk with Taylor discussing the topic with her mother, "I called my mom, she said that it was for the best / I called my mom, she said to get it off my chest." The excerpt that is shown can be put into the context of Taylor and Joe's PR teams having a subtle yet public discussion. It's believed that Joe's team tells The Daily Mail information, while Taylor's tells Entertainment Tonight. This can be seen in respective articles on April 11, 2023 when the break up was all over. When TTPD was announced, a source from Joe said, "If it is a diss album, that is shady. He helped her with song writing on her past album so it will really come as a shock to him if she talks about their breakup, as it is something he has not spoken of at all." Then the response was basically: Taylor writes about her life and will write about the good and bad in every relationship. This is not new and should've been expected. What I'm trying to portray is that Joe already knows what Taylor's up to when it comes to her songwriting - especially on TTPD. Taylor intends to reveal everything in her own way - like she has done multiple times with other exes (Harry Styles being a notable one).

Henry IV Part 1:

Synopsis: "Henry IV, Part 1, culminates in the battle of Shrewsbury between the king’s army and rebels seeking his crown. The dispute begins when Hotspur, the son of Northumberland, breaks with the king over the fate of his brother-in-law, Mortimer, a Welsh prisoner. Hotspur, Northumberland, and Hotspur’s uncle Worcester plan to take the throne, later allying with Mortimer and a Welsh leader, Glendower. As that conflict develops, Prince Hal—Henry IV’s son and heir—carouses in a tavern and plots to trick the roguish Sir John Falstaff and his henchmen, who are planning a highway robbery. Hal and a companion will rob them of their loot—then wait for Falstaff’s lying boasts. The trick succeeds, but Prince Hal is summoned to war. In the war, Hal saves his father’s life and then kills Hotspur, actions that help to redeem his bad reputation. Falstaff, meanwhile, cheats his soldiers, whom he leads to slaughter, and takes credit for Hotspur’s death."

O my good lord, why are you thus alone? For what offense have I this fortnight been A banished woman from my Harry’s bed? Tell me, sweet lord, what is ’t that takes from thee Thy stomach, pleasure, and thy golden sleep? Why dost thou bend thine eyes upon the earth And start so often when thou sit’st alone? Why hast thou lost the fresh blood in thy cheeks And given my treasures and my rights of thee To thick-eyed musing and curst melancholy? In thy faint slumbers I by thee have watched, And heard thee murmur tales of iron wars, Speak terms of manage to thy bounding steed, Cry “Courage! To the field!” And thou hast talked Of sallies and retires, of trenches, tents, Of palisadoes, frontiers, parapets, Of basilisks, of cannon, culverin, Of prisoners’ ransom, and of soldiers slain, And all the currents of a heady fight. Thy spirit within thee hath been so at war, And thus hath so bestirred thee in thy sleep, That beads of sweat have stood upon thy brow Like bubbles in a late-disturbèd stream, And in thy face strange motions have appeared, Such as we see when men restrain their breath On some great sudden hest. O, what portents are these?  Some heavy business hath my lord in hand,  And I must know it, else he loves me not.

The play itself is similar to the first and third stages of grief, denial and bargaining. The excerpt shows bargaining as well. She is begging to know more, to know everything that is causing him turmoil - begging for the footnotes in the story of your life-esque. There are many areas of this section where I can point to folklore, Lover, and Midnights (I will discuss it more in detail in another post).

A Midsummer Night’s Dream:

Synopsis: "In A Midsummer Night’s Dream, residents of Athens mix with fairies from a local forest, with comic results. In the city, Theseus, Duke of Athens, is to marry Hippolyta, queen of the Amazons. Bottom the weaver and his friends rehearse in the woods a play they hope to stage for the wedding celebrations. Four young Athenians are in a romantic tangle. Lysander and Demetrius love Hermia; she loves Lysander and her friend Helena loves Demetrius. Hermia’s father, Egeus, commands Hermia to marry Demetrius, and Theseus supports the father’s right. All four young Athenians end up in the woods, where Robin Goodfellow, who serves the fairy king Oberon, puts flower juice on the eyes of Lysander, and then Demetrius, unintentionally causing both to love Helena. Oberon, who is quarreling with his wife, Titania, uses the flower juice on her eyes. She falls in love with Bottom, who now, thanks to Robin Goodfellow, wears an ass’s head. As the lovers sleep, Robin Goodfellow restores Lysander’s love for Hermia, so that now each young woman is matched with the man she loves. Oberon disenchants Titania and removes Bottom’s ass’s head. The two young couples join the royal couple in getting married, and Bottom rejoins his friends to perform the play."

No epilogue, I pray you. For your play needs no excuse. Never excuse. For when the players are all dead, there need none to be blamed. Marry, if he that writ it had played Pyramus and hanged himself in Thisbe’s garter, it would have been a fine tragedy; and so it is, truly, and very notably discharged. But, come, your Bergomask. Let your epilogue alone. ⌜Dance, and the players exit.⌝ The iron tongue of midnight hath told twelve. Lovers, to bed! ’Tis almost fairy time. I fear we shall outsleep the coming morn As much as we this night have overwatched. This palpable-gross play hath well beguiled The heavy gait of night. Sweet friends, to bed. A fortnight hold we this solemnity In nightly revels and new jollity.

The excerpt here, once again, has many points where connections to Taylor's previous work can be easily made. But, also, it shows the final and fifth stage of grief, acceptance.

The Merchant of Venice - In 2019, for Lover promotion, Taylor came out with a playlist called The Playlist of ME! on Apple Music. It featured ME! and eventually You Need To Calm Down when it came out (because this playlist came out originally on May 23, 2019), but also many songs from other artists. One of the songs was Venice Bitch by Lana Del Rey.

Jane Austen has mentioned a “senight” in her letters- which is a week compared to the 2 week “fortnight”

"We have also heard from Godmersham, & the day of your Uncle & Fanny’s coming is fixed; they leave home tomorrow senight, spend two days in Town & are to be with us on Thursday May 2nd - We are to see your Cousin Edward likewise, but probably not quite so soon."

(I would like to mention that May 2nd is a Thursday this year as well and the 3rd is a fortnight from April 19th)

[bunnieshoneys]

Hello! It's a me, one of the many essay writers in your comments section here to spam you with a million questions!!!

How far into his G1 rookie season did Getou's dad die? (don't have to answer if this is spoilery btw)

Would you say it was inevitable for STSG to have a falling out, or was them being teammates the main factor in their not breakup-breakup? And if this is spoilery, do I get to attempt to start discourse on it?

Where are you finding all these banger songs for inspo?!?!?!? I haven't been able to find crackers for ages (my Discover weekly was admittedly screwed over by streaming a certain artist for three months but that's a whole other issue imo) and am in desperate need for new stuff ;-;

Do any of the characters have pets outside of Megumi having Toto?

Is Go/jo having engineering student level knowledge just him being a nerdy lil' guy or is it a product of his upbringing?

Sorta relating to the last one, how important is Go/jo's non-Getou related backstory (like parental relationships and stuff) to the narrative/his character? (Well I mean I assume it'd be important in general regarding who he is considering developmental years are always important since, y'know, they DEVELOP who you are and stuff, unless you're doing an amnesia fic which this is not so whatever)

Did kid Tsumiki just... go into Go/jo's house with Megumi when he told them to stay in the guest room (while very drunk/hungover)???

Does Ui Ui exist?

Relating to previous question, is Mei Mei still.. uh... *gestures to recent episodes* ????

How bad has the media been in the past regarding Go/jo and Megumi's relationship?

Did Megumi's mom stop racing after marrying Toji?

Did Yuta only win the 2021 championship, or has he won multiple?

Based off the previous question, which championships has Go/jo won?

Again, faaantastic fic!!! Wow wow wow, this is seriously so much fun lmfao, I don't think I've been this invested in something for a good while, so yeah, good job!!!! Looking forward to the next chapter :p

HI !! answering this on my phone whilst on the move, so i apologise for spellings etc

1. spoilers, although i dont think ive ever explicitly stated the time period his dad dies, correct me if im wrong!

2. aaaah, now this is a good one! id say it was relatively inevitable. they, at some point, would have fought close and hard for championships with each other and that wouldve have caused something to go down. however being teammates compounded this i would also say. so both yes and no, but the nature of teammates in racing means that the fight would have been much more intense than if they were in diff teams. i would, however, also say its pretty inevitable that they became teammates, too: their connections in the sport and their shared childhoods mean that they would likely have been on the same team together at some point: gojo was also DESPERATE to be teammates with getou, and what gojo wants, he gets.

3. i listen to A LOT of music lol. my spotify in 2020 was 130k minutes on lockdown, and this year it was 79k. i listen to over 3k minutes a week on avg according to my apps! so i guess its just a lot of time, and artist radios on spotify

4. ive not thought about that! i think haibara and nanami probably have cats, and yuuji would probably have cats too, but not many of them would have pets i dont think :( youre not allowed to take them on the road, and theyre away from home for so much time its not worth it.

5. product of upbringing, and absorbing info. it comes up a little later, but gojo isnt as smart when it comes to engineering as either shoko or getou (getou defo could have been an engineer, if he wanted). yuki is also very engineering-minded, but obviously the only actual engineer here is shoko, and she’s very, very good at her job.

6. its pretty important. the post-getou years (2014-2021) are pretty important, as is his childhood. but it comes up in past pov, and getou just considers him priveleged lol so it doesnt come up until later. but it does get expanded upon!

7. she looked up his address and basically demanded to know where their dad had gone - she was also angry at gojo in particular since gojo was the one beating toji in the championship - this is vaguely spoilery, but tsumiki didnt know the real reason toji left at the time.

8. probably!

9. uh. tbh i needed filler names more than anything. mei mei isnt squeaky clean in this au, but shes not *gestures* that, either. honestly, shes not a major part of the au and i plan to keep her that way

10. theyve not been great! but we get into that a bit later down the line - the media isnt the kindest to megumi in general tbh.

expanding on media, gojo / megumi are probably the drivers that have the media be harsher to them more than most. haibara is kind to everyone, but megumi’s link to toji and gojo’s general personality mean the media doesnt particularly enjoy them. yuuji, and getou are much more popular and well liked, but in the future i imagine nobara and the press not really getting on either.

mai also should be treated badly by the media considering her overall temperament, but she gets away with much more bc shes a zenin. another element of megumi being treated badly is bc hes a zenin reject as such

11. yes. she stopped racing when she got pregnant, she was G2 at the time but this isnt really expanded upon (at least, unless i write a more in depth itafushi of this au lol)

12. yuuta has only won one championship, 2021. in an early draft that was posted, he also won 2020, but thats no longer canon. theres also an interview snippet somewhere that refers to 2022 being possibly his third championship somewhere that i need to correct, but yuuta only won in 2021. his rookie season was 2020.

13. gojo won 2012,2013, 2015,2016,2017, and 2018. in 2019 and 2020, the car was Bad, lol

i love u and i love answering these teehee :)