#like its healthcare but still
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#work has made my life hell the past few days#im really tired of the constant busy go go go feelings#like its healthcare but still#50+ patients in an ER that only has 25 rooms??#and its that many people all day from the moment i get there til i leave??#i want to quit#i want help#i want to just not have so many patients#sorry for rambling im juat so exhausted physically and mentally#moth talk
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Yet again I'm thinking about the eradication of culture within the THG universe,, I have very complex opinions on culture wars within Panem and if they would exist at all in certain cases but like. Do you think they still speak Spanish in Ten? Do you think trans people can still change their names and wear what they please as long as they meet their daily quotas? Do families with religious ancestors remember to observe their holy days, even if it's in private, or was the eradication of religion in Panem so concrete that they don't remember anything at all? Much to think about
#even though THG isn't centred around its world as much as its politics (and for good reason!) i still find it fascinating to think abt#i have a LOT of thoughts about being trans in panem. specifically being trans as a victor#we know (or its implied mostly by ballad) that being queer isn't criminalised and katniss tells us people can marry who they like#but i can definitely see transness being an issue specifically for district people in the eyes of the capitol#obviously the class divide the districts represent would eradicate any possible trans healthcare#but i can see being trans as something the capitol would celebrate as unique and. almost fashionable?#so district people who have no trans medicare or even knowledge would be naturally skeptical of this 'capitol' thing#<- basically by making it a capitol thing it ellimates the rebellion present in the concept of being trans and keeps poorer ppl in line#just. something something removing everything a community could coalesce around by normalising some things and eradicating others#thg#the hunger games#thg series
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lmao sorry to everyone in my inbox, this month has been a mess and I'm just not really around enough for it. someone in my immediate family got a new cancer diagnosis, my not-art job got restructured because management is a joke and it's been.... not great, to be honest! to top it off, my mom's cousin just died because the major hospital didn't have enough beds open for the provincial hospital to transfer him. etc etc etc.
anyway. it's been a lot and I'm Very Tired Of Things Happening 馃檭
#tbd later#SHDSSHSH im so behind on emails and emails take precedent over my inbox but i WILL get around to my inbox at some point#its also annoying (in general) that the healthcare system in america is in such shambles that i can't book an appointment#with any doctor in public transit distance because everyone's maxxed out like okay! i cant afford private health insurance so i guess#we'll just figure things out ourselves. I GUESS#AND because of how freelancer taxes work i still havent saved up quite enough for a new laptop and im running out of space on my phone for#books aughghghghghgh (books = art&history related research etc. it's for work. my current set up is very goofy)
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My 2022 through present obsession with the riddler explains my fascination with the United healthcare shooter, the neural pathways were already there and WELL established
#I鈥檓 not a hardcore danocel anymore because I鈥檓 medicated but like still#its the principle of the thing#united healthcare#danonation
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idk, i dont think people are inherently Wrong in saying that the events of "breaking bad" wouldn't have happened if the us had universal healthcare but like. walter straight up broke off his engagement with gretchen because her family's wealth made him feel insecure and refused elliott's monetary offer and gave his own son the cold shoulder for creating a gofundme for him. even treatment paid for by the federal government probably would've made him seethe
#syd squeaks#its the same thing with 'saw' like tbf 'saw' is a more concentrated critique of healthcare costs among other things#but like jigsaw would still be making traps and walter white would still be cooking meth with universal healthcare#their stories are not ones that could've been easily resolved by healthcare the cancer was just a stepping stone etc etc#breaking bad#walter white
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why does every article reporting on idf war crimes go "hamas, who started the war on october 7th with their brutal terrorist attack slaughtering innocent israeli civilians, has condemned the idf's use of-"? like, nearly verbatim every single time. we know about october 7th. we know by now. half the time, hamas isnt even relevant but they gotta find some way to sow doubt and numb any potential compassion responses. will you get fired if you show sympathy for murdered palestinian civilians without first adding a disclaimer saying its all their fault for being born in gaza? if you call "palestinians under 18" children? if you use the words "murdered" or "brutal" or "massacre" for acts that didnt occur on october 7th? if you call a spade a spade? why are israeli reports front page news without proper fact-checking but palestinian reporting is always "allegedly" even when theres video evidence? why does the idf not get the hamas treatment of reminding everyone that theyre biased before treating their words as law, like they havent been caught bold-faced lying again and again?
#soooooo fucking infuriating#'palestinians are allegedly starving but thats what hamas (who are savage terrorists in case you forgot) said as well so who knows?'#'idf soldiers are allegedly bragging about and showing pictures and videos of their war crimes on social media but#its not in english so we may never know what theyre saying. palestinian ''civilians'' are translating so whatever they say must be wrong'#'in other news. heres what ''doctors'' are referring to as a ''calendar'' but is written in arabic (terrorist language) so the idf must be#telling the truth when they say its proof they are all evil and must in some nebulous way suddenly stop living'#to be fair. the 'secret hamas names list disguised as calendar but REALLY about oct 7' shit was the target of skepticism quite early on#but it really does show how often the idf lies to justify obvious war crimes#maybe they should provide verified evidence or even just be given a bias disclaimer before printing their claims as fact???#every single fucking death toll is phrased as 'hamas-run ministry of health reports death toll of x' like?#yeah? thats their fucking government? what else do you expect?#you do understand that the healthcare portion of their government is probably more reputable#than what the phrasing of those headlines are obviously trying to imply?#i understand that bias is still possible there but its not armed combatants making shit up#its doctors who receive govt paychecks doing their best to identify the disfigured bodies not buried under rubble#youre not slick with that wording
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there is something so deeply american about the fact that the super special reward that the human protagonist receives at the end of the last transformers movie for helping to save the planet is government-funded healthcare
#like yes its really fancy top shelf healthcare but still.#transformers rise of the beasts#noah diaz#not st#doctor's log
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so wild that whenever i see sonic fanart on here theres like a 60 percent chance sonic will have top surgery scars and this is just an accepted thing and barely anyone questions it back in my day if you said you think any sonic character isn't cis or het 500 people would suddenly appear to demand evidence or to just tell you you're wrong and you cant say that
#or maybe its just the tumblr side of the sonic fanbase thats normal about trans sonic and everywhere else is still weird about it#who knows#its also kinda funny seeing him be drawn with top surgery scars like how did he get those#either the sonic universe has zero restrictions on trans healthcare for minors or he didnt get it done the normal legal way#teenagers technically not being allowed to go on hrt or get any surgery but sonic somehow managing to do that stuff anyway#is definitely on brand for him though to be honest#thouhg my favorite explanation is that theyre not real scars at all#theyre just transgender swag markings that magically appeared on his body
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Hira's year in medical review:
Me, August 2023: *experiencing extreme fatigue, fainting spells, mood swings, sudden and drastic increase of suicidal thoughts, and intense hair loss*
P.A: let's do blood work
Me: ok!
Bloodwork: *normal except for prolactin*
Doctor: sometimes that's a fluke so let's retest
Me: ok
Bloodwork: *exactly the same*
Doctor: your values are higher than normal range, but not high enough to be in range for a pituitary gland tumor.
(P.A: go see an endocrinologist and get an MRI, that might be indicative of a pituitary gland tumor.) <- bless this person and only this person in particular
Endocrinologist, seen earliest available which was January 2024: *wants to retest blood work instead of ordering an MRI*
Me: ... ok
Bloodwork: *the same*
Me: can we please do an MRI now?
Endocrinologist: Well. Your values are above the normal limit, but it's highly unlikely that's it's a pituitary gland tumor because they are not high enough for that. Let's retest blood work in four months.
Me: ...................... ok
Bloodwork, May 2024: *THE SAME*
Endocrinologist: hmm, I recommend an MRI
Me: *gesturing angrily*
MRI, June 2024: 馃帀 pituitary gland tumor 馃帀
Doctor, when I went in for something else: I doubt your endocrinologist will want to treat that, we typically don't treat adenomas that small
Endocrinologist, who took 3 weeks to review my results: I recommend just monitoring. It's highly unlikely that this is causing your symptoms, it's too small for that.
Me, July 2024:
#like im sorry but 'highly unlikely' =/= 'impossible'#sure it might be rare but like thats not a reason not to check it out???#idk wtf is with this resistance to treat it#like SO WHAT if in the majority of people a microadenoma of that size doesnt cause symptoms?? all individuals are different#like y'all didnt even think i had one because it was atypical presentation so maybe that's the case with my symptoms too#what would it hurt to do meds for it?#if i do meds to shrink it and my symptoms resolve; great!#if i do meds and my symptoms dont resolve? thats also great! it means we've ruled one thing out#and can continue exploring why THE FUCK my body is acting the way it is#why wouldn't you want to rule things out if you can?????#the healthcare in this country is so fucking broken#its been almost a year since i went in for my symptoms and still no resolution#ive lost about 2/3 of my hair at this point. ill probably have to chop it off if it keeps going like this#not even gonna talk about the fatigue#nor gonna talk about my sis's current experience where an untreated infection (not for lack of her trying to get it treated!)#is potentially now developing into something more serious. like kidney stuff. 馃檭#(and they apparently have no record of the labs she submitted 馃檭馃檭 so she's gotta go do it all over again otherwise they wont give her meds)#it's okay. its just nausea to the point she hasn't really eaten in days and constant pain and dizziness. difficulty standing#but its fine right lmao#ughhh#dont mind me im just frustrated beyond everything and need to yell into my little corner of the void#withoutwords
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Omfg UK and US 18-25s I'm begging you to vote in the general/presidential election 馃槶馃槶馃槶 young people already don't vote and then to actively abstain (I get it, all your options suck) but then politicians will have zero reason to appeal to you ever! You're entirely excluding yourselves from the conversation! Vote strategically to vote OUT the worst dude but just vote fr
I know they're all doing genocide and it's fucked but like you literally are not preventing genocide by not voting you're just sitting on your hands
#politics#voting#general election#presidential election#potus#uk#usa#tories#labour#lib dems#republicans#democrats#i know i hate keir starmer and rishi sunak too#trump and biden should be in a retirement facility#but trump is a full on nationalist and biden is at least not a complete nazi like thats a low bar and hes still doing genocide#but so is trump like genocide is unfortunately a given for both elections like none of your options are anti genocide#yes this is hell but like you have to show out in large numbers to prove youre even around and caring about this stuff#or like neo liberals and conservatives will run your countries into the ground even more#like the uk housing and healthcare systems rn are about to collapse entirely#trump is going to manipulate the functioning of government to creep into authoritarianism#its like not a secret this is their platform#serious you have to vote#protest vote#strategic vote
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what if i lost the will to live like. as a joke. what then.
#i am fine ftr im just. exhausted haha#NOT to overshare about my personal life too much but my dog is dying. my horse is being given back to his og owner this summer / fall.#my dads kicking me out in two years (in favor of his girlfriend and her kids bc he would rather live w them!!!)#his alcoholism is driving me crazy bc hes treating me like absolute shit and berating me constantly#and stealing from me 馃檭#ive lost my healthcare benefits + now have to either raw dog therapy out of pocket or loose my therapist#a therapist that took me a year of being on a waiting list to get in w btw#and idk i just genuinely feel like a loser rn like. im a 23 year old unemployed fat virgin who plays video games all day like. 馃#where is this going for me. what is the point of it all. in two years im going to be fucking homeless on top of all that#unless some miracle happens bc as is i am too disabled to work.#im just reaching a point where i deeply dont care anymore. whatever happens happens im done fighting it#and ik its the abandonment issues talking here but knowing my dad is planning on abandoning me. 馃憤#thats two for two on parents leaving me. my entire family has at this point so like truly i cant trust any relationship#like if my PARENTS find me that unbearable. and my best friend who knew me my entire life thought so. then truly every relationship#i ever have is on a fucking timer like. idk if any besties r reading this im sorry i promise this is in no way a dig at yall#bc you guys do really make me feel loved and secure in a way no one else has but. id be lying if i said i wasnt still scared#anyways enough oversharing#i really am fine and safe rn btw like. at minimum u guys r stuck w me until arc*ne season 2 comes out 馃槀#my post
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I'm sick of having to be nice when telling people that they should do anything in their power to protect minorities. I'm sick of having to ask nicely that people pretty please don't do something that actively endangers minorities lives. I'm sick of the entire idea that we have to be nice and civil to people that want us dead or those that enable the people that want us dead through inaction.
I'm so so tired of having to be polite to fascists and bigots just so that my entire argument isn't thrown out for being emotional, irrational, and extreme. I'm sick of the entire political sphere feeling like reactionary abuse, where the abuser pushes you and pushes you and pushes you until you finally snap just for them to use that to frame you as the bad guy to everyone else.
I'm sick of the expectation of civil conversations with someone that already views us as less than human. We shouldn't have to reason with people that want all minorities dead to come up with some kind of middle ground that just keeps moving the line further and further right anyways.
#im genuinely so sick of being nice#im sick of pretending like their lives matter to me at all when its clear that my life doesnt matter to them#and im sick of leftist ideals of anti violence being seen as the only option#like we have to say that they should have the right to healthcare or blah blah blah whatever#we have to say that everyone should have that right even ppl that have spent their entire lives stripping those rights from others#but if youve spent your entire life trying to criminalize abortion and suddenly you need one#i think its just too fucking bad for you sucks to suck#im sick of personally having to pretend to care about people who jot only dont care about me but actively want to hurt me#just for the sake of being respected by other leftists#but the truth is#for me at least#is that every single person who just voted for trump could drop dead this second and I wouldn't feel anything but relief#i wouldn't shed a single tear over it#maybe my complete lack of compassion or sympathy towards them in any way is genuinely morally bad but its still how i feel anyways
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Hey by the way. If you can't respect and acknowledge mentally AND Physically disabled people, people of color, immigrants who don't know your country's language, queer people (ESP TRANS PEOPLE), fat people, people who aren't of your religion, and overall anyone not like you,
YOU HAVE NO FUCKING BUSINESS WORKING IN HEALTHCARE!!!!!!!!!!!
#the amount of conservatives i work with makes me wanna derogatorily thow up and then shred them with my vomit covered teeth#when you work in healthcare you vow to help your patients/residents NO MATTER WHAT.#it doesnt matter if you think theyre delusional because theyre trans or you think theyre delusional#becauase they have dimentia. you fucking help that person out while acknowledging them as a HUMAN BEING#WHO DESERVES LOVE AND COMPASSION#its a stressful field to be honest but its so important to give others a better quality of life when you can#its too late for me to learn chinese but im still trying to learn small#words and phrases bclike#isolation fucking sucks#and the us healthcare system already makes chronically disabled people feel like invisible trash bc 'ew we dont wanna see *those* freaks#in public.#and i couldnt imagine experiencing that ON TOP OF NOT EVEN BEING ABLE TO SPEAK TO ANYONE!!#anyways the healthcare field is perfect for autistics and both low and high empathy people. so long as you have a bit of patience#tony speaks
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I've legitimately been thinking a lot about trans women lately and like the women I know in my life and how complex and human and real they are. Specifically because I understand the world is not kind to trans women and likes to generalize them horribly.
I know a woman who's an artist and spending her time dreaming about stars. I know another woman who's a terrible friend and manipulative as hell. I know one who's shy and sweet and so intelligent. Trans women can be so many things 馃挅
I really care deeply about trans women and I hope in my friend groups I'm a good ally to them and know to stand up vocally for them. Trans women deserve so much and they're given not enough. Everyone can do something to stop transphobia by speaking up when they hear it. Don't let your friends make transphobic jokes. Don't let your dad regurgitate trump's words. Protect the trans women in your life and everywhere else, they need to be loved and respected. Mwah! 馃グ
#mine#馃挅馃グtrans women馃グ馃挅#all humans are complex and its a beautiful thing#*cough* and a small thought#if we deny healthcare to one prisoner. no matter how disgusting the crime. it sets a precedent to deny healthcare to any prisoner#for any reason#and denying a prisoner trans healthcare is denying a prisoner life saving medicine in my opinion#trans healthcare saves lives#its basic healthcare if you ask me not some sort of secret sect of magic healthcare that should cost more#so yeah. i think people who've done horrible things should have trans healthcare in prison#but thats not even getting into my opinions on prison abolishment. thats just talking about prison existing now#so idk if yall know what case im talking about? i could find it if anyones curious i didnt dig into it at allll#just some stoned opinions from a gender fucked bitch#ummm prisoners deserve healthcare?#duh#trans rights are human rights#pre school levels of basic respect#ive been thinking about this way too much lately since im all gender fucky and i feel like trans women are just .... intelligent about those#feelings. yk? and that's me generalizing but i mean all the Tumblr ladies i see on my dash talking about life and experiences#they are smart ladies#tumblr promotes terf content and deletes trans womens blogs and i try to follow trans women but tumblr still recommends terf blogs to me#i am angry bout it#i have a very complex and long standing relationship with gender identity and gender fuckery *pulls out my resum茅*#idk thoughts#im stoned sorry yall#serious post but im not being unstupid#what#okay#bye
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How many wishiwashi do you think it would take to overthrow capitalism?
Buddy I've spent the last four years trying to find the answer to that exact same question
#asks#irl pokemon#pokemon irl#water pokemon#wishiwashi#at least hoenn is pretty good. fairly socialist#its not like...perfect. i still pay rent and have a job#but the fact that my healthcare is 100% govt subsidized#and i can just take a year off literally anytime to go on an adventure with my pokemon and its pto the whole time#pretty nice
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frustrating how fucking. disabling. being disabled is rn. im tired
#migraine buddy helpfully showed me my midas score which puts me in severely disabled bc of my migraines based on their impact#which on one hand was helpful in a sense of like. hey dude. these things fuck you up and have a huge impact and jts a thing#most peiple dont have to deal with. but also was like. god yeah i sure am and also i sure am still working full time and having to just.#work thru them and cope bc i certainly cant afford to have less money#its so fuckin i furiating being disabled in the us. i cant stop working bc then ill loose my healthcare which still costs me so much money#scream. tired.#my PA for nurtec was denied bc my ins wants me to try a diff one first#which is stupid bc like one why do u get to override my dr for your budget.#why does my healthcare need to suffer because youre cheap. you arent living with this shit.#and also the alternatives they suggested are injection based which. is scary for me as someone who used to have a terrible needle phobia#jax is able to help me w them which is good bc i know i cant give myself them (maybe could do the auto injectors but idk)#but its still so. why are u like thia. also it took u so long to deny my PA and im on no preventatives rn waiting for Something#to be approved. ugh. scream.
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