#isolation fucking sucks
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tony-andonuts Ā· 10 months ago
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Hey by the way. If you can't respect and acknowledge mentally AND Physically disabled people, people of color, immigrants who don't know your country's language, queer people (ESP TRANS PEOPLE), fat people, people who aren't of your religion, and overall anyone not like you,
YOU HAVE NO FUCKING BUSINESS WORKING IN HEALTHCARE!!!!!!!!!!!
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transmechanicus Ā· 3 months ago
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I know some people have unfathomable beef with the term but i really donā€™t see the issue with transmascs describing their specific experiences with societal mistreatment and persecution as ā€œtransandrophobiaā€, like i think itā€™s good to be able to discuss specific experiences and articulate the problems youā€™re facing actually.
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autistickaitovocaloid Ā· 1 year ago
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collection of tiny guys
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serpentface Ā· 6 months ago
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Hibrides and Brakul having the worldā€™s saddest booze-fueled girlā€™s night, probably a few months before the start of the story.
Anyway here's an extensive rundown of their shared history.
Hibrides Uryashta was the eldest daughter of a chancellor of the imperial city-state of Erubinnos (his lordship Erub Uryashta). She was brought up with great privilege and security, but (like most daughters of noblemen) was destined to be used as a bargaining chip in a political marriage arrangement. She was taken from her friends and family and moved to the city of Wardin at the age of 16 to complete her pledged marriage with Janeys Haidamane, the failson of the trade magnate Haidamane family. Janeys spent about a week poorly attempting to behave like a husband, and then took the first excuse to flee and engage in a petty military campaign against raiders on the Yellowtail trade route. She found herself left alone in his villa for three years with only hired servants for company. She made a few attempts to break into the city's elite social scene, but was quite shy and failed to make any headway.
Brakul had just spent a year and a half in a bit of a whirlwind. He was brought into a skirmish at the behest of an allied clan, who had been raiding the Yellowtail route and now was under attack by combined forces of an enemy clan and Imperial Wardi mercenaries. He killed one of the mercenary commanders and was captured as a prisoner of war, but was spared at Janeys' behest (who fucking hated that guy thought it was awesome that he got killed with a rock) and was ultimately recruited into the group. He had a chance to go back home, but actively chose to deadbeat dad out on his wife and child to be with his newfound lovequest, Janeys. He spent a year and a half as a mercenary, bonded closely with Janeys and swore brotherhood with him, and was eventually brought home to the city of Wardin with him. He found himself in the odd position of being simultaneously scorned as a foreigner and 'heathen', and the legal kin of one of the richest families in the city (and effectively the secret male concubine of their only male heir).
It was in this context that the two of them met, with Hibrides now being 19 and Brakul turning 27.
The two were initially wary of each other (Hibrides was particularly put off by his 'heathen' status) but bonded very quickly, partly due to their mutual states of being unmoored from their old lives, but in large part being just a natural chemistry. They had a lot of common interests and enjoyed learning from each other. Hibrides introduced him to traditional verse poetry (of which she was very fond). Brakul taught her how to ride khait, and even gave her a gelding from his own collection as a gift. They became very close friends over the next couple of years and spent much of their free time together.
A big part of the dynamic was that both of them are gay in a cultural context where there is no concept of Being gay, marriages are usually arranged and always between a man and a woman, and having children is a societal expectation. Each of them began to see the other as an ideal husband/wife, ie "if I had to marry why couldn't it have been him/her?". For Hibrides' part, Brakul had all the traits she would want in a husband: he was a pretty good friend and easy to get along with, he seemed like he'd do an excellent job of fulfilling expected roles as a husband and father (she didn't know about the wife and kid for a while), he treated her as an equal, and, most of all, had no interest whatsoever in fucking her. They were both in a sort of platonic emotional affair, and grew to love each other deeply.
Hibrides was pretty quick to catch on that something was going on between Brakul and Janeys, and found it strange and offputting but ultimately none of her concern. Her husband only being interested in his sworn brother and leaving her to her own devices suited Hibrides just fine, and Brakul always just kinda being There meant she was living with what had become her closest friend.
The stable state of this Feelings Triangle began to change in the wake of the brilliant plan to get Janeys (gay) (probably infertile) children he could pass off as legitimate via a Brakul/Hibrides pregnancy. It was something all three agreed to as a necessity; it was already drawing scrutiny that Janeys and Hibrides had been married for several years without a pregnancy, and producing heirs is a societal expectation and a central point of an arranged marriage between wealthy elites.
It was especially critical in this case, given Janeys was his family's only male child and only hope of continuing the family line, given both his golden-child sister Faiza and black sheep half sister Couya were Odonii, and thus sworn virgins and would never marry. (There's also a level to this that Janeys was regarded as a complete disappointment by his parents, and his mother made damn sure he knew that his only value at this point was to produce a better male heir to inherit the business. So this was a big fucking deal to him, and to Brakul by extension).
This was also not a route any of them wanted to take on any personal level, least of all Hibrides. She consented to the pregnancy and everything it entailed, but it was inevitably a painful and distressing experience all around. She had never wanted to be a mother to begin with (though had long accepted it as an inevitability), and now found herself with an infant daughter, which only meant it would have to happen again (they needed a male heir after all). And it would be utter social suicide and a profound shame upon her if the child's illegitimacy was discovered, which only added to the stress.
To make things worse, her first pregnancy shifted the entire dynamic with her husband and brother-in-law/best friend. Janeys changed from completely indifferent to actively spiteful and hostile towards her, and things had become extremely uncomfortable between Hibrides and Brakul. It only got worse with Brakul (the only one of them who actually WANTS kids) (kind of haunted by skipping out on his first child) finding it unbearable to be so close to HIS daughter and having to keep up an act that she was not his own, having no direct role in the kids life. He desperately wanted to be a father.
Hibrides, who was going through a fucking lot, started to become vindictive towards him for his role in things. She resented him more than Janeys, because Brakul insisted he cared about her and would desperately try to pretend things were normal, while consistently siding with Janeys against her wishes, including in preventing her from getting a divorce. (His excuse is that the children's legitimacy would be interrogated in a legal setting, which Is likely and Would be absolute social suicide with very real consequences. But the real reason on his part is that if she got out of the marriage, he might never see her or the children again). Hibrides began to do everything in her power to prevent him from having any relationship with his bastard children, even in secret or under the guise of a relative. Sort of an ā€œif I have to suffer to keep up this facade so should youā€ thing.
They had two children in a span of three years, two girls (ruh roh!) named Erubi and Livya. By this point, Hibrides and Brakul were both experiencing what we would now call Clinical Depression and Alcohol Use Disorder (especially in the latter's case). Hibrides started to have affairs with both men and women, which she was sure to be very obvious about to insult Janeys and Brakul, but was mostly out of loneliness. Brakul turned his complete focus to Janeys and started avoiding Hibrides entirely, in hopes that she would become desperate enough to be willing to make amends (shockingly, this did not happen, and the rift only deepened).
In the present, their relationship status is: fucked. Both of them do still love each other on some level, but this is probably beyond repair. What little time they've spent with each other in the past year is sitting around being miserable and getting plastered. And now Hibrides, Janeys, and Brakul are all forced into the public eye on the pilgrimage together, and with a third child on the way. So that's probably going to be everyone's problem.
#Their relationship is probably my favorite one in this story but there is literally so much going on. Hard to introduce it properly#This doesn't even get into all of it#Do want to make it clear that Brakul is like. Nice on an interpersonal level but he fucking sucks and is not the victim in this dynamic#He's very selfish. He builds his life around having his cake and eating it too and then moping and being sad and etc when he can't#escape the consequences of hurting people around him#I don't like writing dynamics where one person is like the absolute perfect innocent victim like. Hibrides does some just plain#cruel shit to him. But she's REALLY going through it. She's isolated and lonely and the only person in her life who has loved#her in the past decade won't put his own personal interests aside to actually Help Her. And then has the audacity to mope to her about#how sad that makes him.#He at least has a (fucked up and messy but) devoted partnership with a guy who ADORES him and perpetually enables him#While Hibrides is very shy and finds it hard to break out of isolation. She doesn't really have anyone to rely on.#She does have other people in her life in general though. Faiza has always been pretty kind to her and was a major support in#helping her manage her children's affairs and being provided for. But they aren't really friends it's kind of a familial obligation#Couya had been an enigma to her and rarely present (because she hates Janeys) but she's forced to be around him more#towards the start of the story and thus has started to actually interact with Hibrides. They befriend each other and have stuff going#on during the story#hibrides uryashta#brakul red dog#Anyway extreme side note I did warn that there would be like a dozen characters with Erub_ names as well as two major cities and a river#It gets like that with legendary founder figures
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dayurno Ā· 2 months ago
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hiii dayurno could you tell me more about raven!jeremy? it's such a new idea sounds very interesting!!!
hiii of course! buckle up. long story and also a collab with ao3 kevjean :3
well first of all let me say that in this au jeremy is not part of the perfect court or in fact even close to it at all. heā€™s a sub striker with a high jersey number who did not see much playtime during his career as a raven and was on the lower end of the raven spectrum skill-wise. this is important to tell you because the fic doesnā€™t start with jeremy in the ravens, it starts with him dealing with the aftermath of the nest getting dissolved and losing every bit of his hopes and dreams after sacrificing everything in his life to make it in eauā€”it starts with kevin salvaging the last dregs of jeremyā€™s college career by recruiting him for the foxes for his last year, even though jeremy, as an ex raven, hates him (and jean) for what theyā€™ve done both to riko and to their team
ok good. so set the scene. jeremy is miserable. the ravens already didnā€™t like kevin and jean to begin with, isolated as they were from the perfect court. now jeremy lost not only his team but the lifestyle surrounding it, the ideology of the ravens, his partner, and his career prospects. he doesnā€™t have the eau raven title anymore and he canā€™t use it to get himself in the line of sight of most pro team recruiters. he gave up a family (that didnā€™t love him much, but still) and a trustfund for this. kevin day leaves the nest, jean moreau follows soon after, and their king kills himself. Do you understand how much jeremy hates them? kevin and jean were perfect court, were untouchable, didnā€™t even know or care to learn his name as a sub striker with not much under his beltā€”and then they left and destroyed everything jeremy had worked so hard for without even thinking about him. without remembering him at all, in fact.
he hates them!!!!!!!! desperately. With a passion. getting recruited for the foxes and by kevin day on top of it all is humiliating, but itā€™s the last chance he has. jeremy arrives in palmetto an angry hateful mess made ten times worse by kevinā€™s constant criticism of him, unaccustomed with normal life and without a partner for the first time in four years. heā€™s volatile and destructive and he has nothing to live for. exy is the only thing he wants and it doesnā€™t want him back. :) kevin steps in and takes jeremyā€™s game from him much like he did with neil, both out of desperation because the foxes are a mess now with the addition of their freshmen, and because, while jeremy isnā€™t really anything to write home about in terms of skill, heā€™s far more ambitious and disciplined than the average fox. jeremy hates kevin but canā€™t afford to reject his help. thus begins the most convoluted raven partnership to ever exist
jeremy hates kevin and has a non-negligible wish to harm him whichever way he can, but heā€™s also a raven that escaped the nest all on his own. he latches onto kevin immediately, the two of them becoming partners in the raven sense of the world while clashing Often and Intensely with each other both on and off court. their relationship gets more and more volatile the more jeremy goes out of his way to get under kevinā€™s skin, resentful and so angry at what the perfect courtā€™s done to him, while kevin sinks his feet in and pushes jeremy way past his limits in his training. basically they are a match made in hell :) lots of hatefucking and jealousy and violence and the one murder attempt ensue as the foxes try to navigate this destructive, hopeless version of jeremy that wants to die and take down as much as he can in the process, up to and including kevin day. theyā€™re together every second of the day and jeremy hates him for everything kevin took from the ravens, but he also depends on kevinā€™s training and presence to feel like a person again. itā€™s a really big mess basically that is eventually made worse (and better) by kevin and jeremy starting to sleep together to get the adrenaline out raven-style. and thatā€™s all without jean coming along, which he will eventually
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evilkitten3 Ā· 1 year ago
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atla crack au where zuko and azula burn the palace down as kids (like 12 and 10, respectively, pre-banishment but post-grandpacide), run away to avoid consequences, and somehow end up "discreetly" living in the abandoned fire nation ship in the south pole ("discreetly" is a word which here means "all the adults know they're there bc they have massive arguments every other day, and when hakoda's nearby he "drops" things that might be useful")
ozai ends up blaming the palace fire on iroh and banishes him. he must capture the children to regain his honor (translator's note: this is adult speak for "get their asses back here so i can ground them for the rest of their lives")
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khaire-traveler Ā· 1 month ago
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Ugh, man. I'm really not feeling great right now. It's one of those moments where you're like, "Wow, I really don't believe in myself and also kind of hate my life." Trying to stay positive about it is unhelpful, I think. I'm not really sure what to feel. Maybe just really alone? Or lost? Oh well. That's that.
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swagging-back-to Ā· 5 months ago
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worst trope is found family separating as soon as the antagonist is dealt with.
#yes this is about voltron and it's also about guardians of the galaxy#what james gunn did to gamora in GOTG3 is criminal#i understand why they did it but to end with her GOING BACK TO THE RAVAGERS?#fail end.#seriously#and it doesnt even make sense bc ofc the high evolutionary isnt going to be the last problem they would deal with#in just a few years they encountered 5 people trying to destroy the universe and who were incredibly difficult foes#youre finna tell me there will never be a situation like that for the rest of their lives?#gtfo#and mantis' end was dumb too not even sorry#i can tolerate drax and nebula's ends.#but everyone else?#stupid#even peter's ending was fucking moronic. bro can pop in on the weekends he doesnt need to be a live in nurse for his grandpa#it's just such a major letdown and sucks everytime a director/author decides to split up the found family permanently#at least with voltron you can rationalize it by saying 'oh they never really wouldve hung out with eachother if they werent forced to for#voltron and werent forced to fight a war together.' and i can see it bc none of them DO hang out together before voltron#they barely even hang out AFTER they become voltron#keith and shiro hang out bc of the adoption/fostering/mentoring thing. lance and hunk MIGHT hang out bc they were already teammates#it's important to note that we never really see hunk and lance being bffs. theyre just friendly to eachother.#this becomes even more apparent once hunk and pidge actually become friends. it's very obvious hunk was just being friendly to lance.#just friendly.#(take this with a grain of salt bc ive only watched the whole series one time. i refuse to acknowledge anything after se 2.)#so yeah it does make more sense theyd all go their own ways but not even the small friend groups stay together at the end!#pidge and hunk are in completely different galaxies from eachother. same with keith and shiro#lance is isolated from all of them bc post se 3 writing team genuinely hated him and failed him as a character.#but GOTG3? they CHOSE to band together time and time again. they CHOSE to be a team. they CHOSE to be family#for every single one of them to say 'nah fuck that i want to be on my own bc uhhh reasons!' is a lame ending.#period.#gotg3
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steakout-05 Ā· 11 days ago
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kinda fucked up that every social invitation to infodump from autistic communities feels like a lie or that it's specifically designed to exclude me from that invite. "feel free to infodump!!" gets processed in my head as "if i say anything i will be ignored or ridiculed or mocked and generally face backlash for not being autistic in the "correct" socially acceptable way therefore i am not included in this statement and will just stay silent as everyone else gets to say stuff. after all the only safe place to infodump is in my own little space", no matter how safe the space actually is. alien amongst aliens so to speak
#even in autistic communities i feel like i don't belong there. like i'm just too much or too little for everyone#(usually too much)#slightly unrelated maybe but one time i was playing this roblox sensory room game (the shitty one with stolen assets)#and i found this book in the game about a bunch of g1 mlp stuff and i was like ''oh my goodness this reminds me of the giant sundance''#like that really rare and obscure big sundance pony they made that's kinda lost media?#and i sorta infodumped about it in chat only to be met with silence as everyone else was chatting about someone's pomni outfit or something#and on god i think that was the most alone i have ever felt playing fucking roblox of all games#i know people are not obligated to respond but like. i felt completely and utterly isolated from everyone else.#it felt like i wasn't the ''correct'' kind of autistic to be included with everyone#it just pissed me off cause i'm feeling alone by being autistic. in a video game. made FOR autistic people. ffs i just can't win can i#anyway yeah i don't play that game anymore. it actually kinda sucks ass anyway like it has a lot of problems#(such as stolen assets and infantilising autistic people and restricting the AAC board to one tiny corner of the room)#(among so many other issues)#can't even feel comfortable autism'ing around other autistic people because what if i'm not doing it correctly#the autism alien metaphor is real guys šŸ˜­#autism#autistic#actually autistic#autistic things#infodumping#social difficulties
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boycritter Ā· 18 days ago
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ohhhh right. i have mental health problem.s
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leafytaffy Ā· 11 months ago
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A lot of discussion involving minors safety online has people saying a lot ā€œjust donā€™t let kids online at all, or control and monitor all their online activity, simple as.ā€
That argument just uh. Completely relies on parents to not be abusive and bigoted. Which most parents nowadays are.
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sangcreole Ā· 3 months ago
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zazikels Ā· 4 months ago
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working on a gifset and can i just say phia saban the ACTRESS THAT YOU ARE:
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the sharp fucking turn when he's like wubuwbwu its a lieeee, the withering looks she gave him. it was excellent.
#tbd#anti helaemond#i guess sorry lol#full offence but i would just throw myself into the godseye if helaena looked at me like that#anyway listen the show is trash and yeah x sucks and y sucks but like i know she channelled all the energy for this one#l'm so bitter about like the lack of helaegon and even saltier bc tom and phia tried to get scenes#they fucked like the worst moment of these two chars lives and didn't even let them share in a loss that only the two of them could fathom#but man i felt it here she was channelling it here ok that's all i can say#it was sooooo you come onto my balcony after you tried to kill my husband and now u try to lie to meee????#will anything come of this? no because condom and hiss are trash but like i am sorryyyyy for enjoying this but i'm not#it's all nonsense but i'm willing to take my CRUMB!!!#but yeah like to be clear: it's frustrating that she's relegated to this no taste for flying shit and i hate it so much#genuinely a disgusting thing to throw in there for a char who canonically loved nothing more than flying on her fucking dragon#bc if they are so determined for her to not wanna burn people there is literally everything to gain and nothing to lose#by having her fly around on dreamfyre just as a show of strength or scouting or anything#and faux feminist sara piss i'll never forgive you for your gross writing#like fucking hate show clownmond so much but like yeah she is his only option i agree#but i'm just going to enjoy this in isolation bc it was so cathartic after rr and a*mond continued to torture a fucking bedridden aegon#and an entire season of his fam treating him like shit#hotd spoilers
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dol--blathanna Ā· 1 year ago
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And then she used the bad outfits to wipe out half the universe
#ok i will try to stop being mean about TWN i swear#it's just that i can't get these godawful costumes out of my head#like ok i don't get book accuracy i don't get yennefer treated fairly i don't get a good edge of the world i don't even get good aguaras#can i AT LEAST get good costumes????#then lucinda broke into my house spat in my face and said no#and i know i'm being mean but it just sucks that the direction of the costumes and the style of the designer is one that i ABSOLUTELY HATE#and to top it all off there's no real cohesion with the outfits and the world#or even the outfits and the characters themselves#lucinda's interpretations and justifications behind the costumes is just one that i don't particularly like#like if there was good reasoning behind them but they weren't executed well then i wouldn't be as disappointed#or if the reasoning was stupid but the costumes actually looked good (or good enough to not completely break my immersion)#that would be at least something#but I get NEITHER#also shout out to two outfits that didn't make the cut:#the stupid fucking bright purple cloak while yennefer is on the run (does not fit in with the practicality of the narrative or character)#and the leaf/constellation (?) dress in 203 that looks like it's five seconds away from slipping off and flashing us all#it's a nice dress in isolation but for me at least really doesn't work with what's happening in the scene narratively or for yen's characte#anti twn#twn critique#twn critical#twn negativity#anti witcher netflix
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the-punforgiven Ā· 4 months ago
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Ugh
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33max Ā· 1 year ago
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me when I remember that I suck and people hate my entire existence
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