#like it's not just Job it's... Adult Life and family and dishes and laundry and trying to keep in touch with friends

[chromochaotic]

tags from a fun artist's blog that just made me feel like a shriveled husk

[noyzinerd]

Derek's Journey Into House Husbandry

Listen, Derek's inheritance was $117 million, same as Peter's. Derek's childhood was spent in a multimillion dollar mansion, with his multimillion dollar family, and he's had an affinity for expensive muscle cars. Then, all the places he lived in after the fire were decrepit safety hazards.

What I'm saying is this boy was a pampered little rich kid for most of his life before living as a hobo for the rest of it.

I like to think that for the first few months of Stiles and Derek living together, Stiles learns very quickly that Derek isn't exactly well-acquainted with "middle-class living".

Just imagine:

When Stiles gets home from work, he asks if Derek could start boiling two cups of water so that Stiles can make rice for dinner after he takes a shower. To which, Derek says "Um...sure."

However, once Stiles finishes and comes to the kitchen, he's met with this:

So, okay, that's on Stiles. Sure, he noticed Derek ordered food a lot and ate out constantly, but it had never occurred to him that he was literally living on takeout because he could afford to. The only reason he wasn't right now was because Stiles had cracked down on takeout (Stiles still had to stay relatively healthy for his job, afterall).

Unfortunately for Stiles, this isn't a one off.

When it's time to tidy up the place a little bit, Stiles tells Derek that he'll vacuum the carpet if Derek will sweep the hardwood.

Unbeknownst to Stiles, Derek hasn't ever needed to sweep before. So, about a half hour later, Stiles checks in, and Derek is just-

sweeping side-to-side, kicking up dust in the air and just spreading it to different areas of the room like a cartoon character because he doesn't know that you're supposed to use the broom to gather the dust into a centralized area (the dust pan) to be thrown away.

But Stiles doesn't have it in him to find it anything other than endearing. It's hard not to when Derek is so fucking earnest. He wants to be helpful. He wants to know how to take care of a house of his very own. Fortunately, Derek's eager to learn and a very quick study.

He learns that dish soap does NOT go in the dishwasher. He learns about the difference between laundry detergent and fabric softener, about emptying the lint trap, about changing the A/C filter, about ironing, about all the vacuum attachments and how to change the bag.

And every time Derek succeeds a little bit at adulting, Stiles sees this spark of joy and sense of accomplishment that is absolutely adorable.

It's not long before Derek takes to being a house husband like a fish to water. Which, honestly? Suits him. It isn't unusual nowadays to find Derek baking bread and watching telenovelas while Stiles is at work, or comparing cantaloupes at the grocery store in a cable knit cardigan and sweat pants.

Watching Derek do a little fist pump to himself every time he earns gas points on his rewards card at the grocery store makes Stiles want to melt into the floor.

[hawtlineblingz]

🌱 UMEMIYA'S MOODBOARD 🌱

I have spent way too much time thinking about Ume - chan as my boyfriend (husband even) 😩 i would LOVE to have a husband like him, and i just can't help myself to make a BF moodboard for him! I haven't read the manga yet, so this MB is solely based on what i've seen on the anime

(might add or lessen things in the future as the anime / the manga progresses | not proofread)

Enjoy some domestic!Umemiya hc ~

🌱 adulting with Umemiya feels like he gave you a glimpse of what it's like to have him as your husband. He's a provider by heart.

🌱 i would think he will buy himself a semi traditional suburban house with quiet a handful of land where he could plant his lovely veggies.

🌱 probably would take a remote job so he still have extra time to tend his garden. He's a carefree person after all.

🌱 would take you to street food festivals, we all know he's a foodie! He would feed you well ♡

🌱 absolutely head over heels if he got a partner that cooks, no need a super skilled one, just someone who would appreciates his well grown crops and knows how to make food with it.

🌱 would ask your fave flower / plant and tries to plant it for you.

🌱 SUPER SUPPORTIVE PARTNER. Encourages you in EVERYTHING, even the smallest things like showering, drinking water, waking up early.

🌱 the neighbors LOVE HIM, would trade crops or even give some of his crops to his neighbors.

🌱 asked you to style him because his friends has been nagging him about his fashion sense.

🌱 OOT but his kisses tastes heavenly.

🌱 have few scratches here and there on his hands from gardening.

🌱 tries to sees the good in every person he met. Would befriend street food vendors in a span of minutes, his social skill is admireable especially if you're a more introverted person, his presence would ease you up in making friends.

🌱 A FAMILY MAN. Dates to marry type of person. He has a clear goal once he got into a relationship with someone aka HE IS NOT AFRAID OF COMMITMENT.

🌱 if you guys are living together as a couple, everyday would felt like theraphy, even mundane task would felt like theraphy. Laundry, cooking, dishes, etc. You don't have to worry about him just laying around being lazy.

🌱 like to invite his friend around to just simply hangout and catch up with each other, his old friends from Bofurin, middle school, orphanage, you name it.

🌱 i feel like at the end of the day, Umemiya fits into the slow living life style. His own family (in the future) where he works and come home to a warm hug from his partner while his kids laying around on the tatami, on the weekend he would fully take care of his garden, letting his kids helps him harvest his crops, just very clichè heartwarming family, reclaiming what he had lost at the early stages of his life.

🌱 life with Umemiya would sounds like Phum Viphurit & BoyPablo's songs

[donnerpartyofone]

I destroyed the house. I've been slowly neatening and cleaning and making things liveable bit by bit for weeks and it's all gone. People joke about the whole Sisyphus thing and they usually mean the rat race of work and bills and not getting ahead, but when I say every day is the same I really mean it. The drawers I "fixed" have stopped closing again because I had to look for something and my "organizing" couldn't withstand that, so now we're back to square one. The clothing I sorted and washed and put away is once again in a 3' deep ocean all over the bedroom, because I had to look for something. The art and comics and little gifts people gave me that I "put away safely" is all wrecked because I had to look for something. The little bags and boxes I made to consolidate different types of things are all over the place again, because I had to look for something. The jewelry I finally organized (after I destroyed more than half of it by trying to clean it) is a mess again because I had to look for something. And I didn't even find the main thing I was looking for, which had a very definite place-it-belongs and is more than a foot long on each side and would be awfully conspicuous in an apartment this size, and whose ENTIRE PURPOSE WAS HELPING ME STAY ORGANIZED, is just gone. I really don't get what could have happened, I must have just slipped into a fugue state and thrown it in the trash. I don't even think I spent my own money on it, I think my husband bought it for me which makes my chronic and destructive wastefulness even more shameful than usual. I was supposed to walk a block and a half to the pharmacy hours ago to find out if they had my backordered medication, so that I could know if I then had to spend the rest of the day calling other pharmacies for the same reason. There's no way I can do that very important thing now, even though the medication is directly related to why I just totally ruined the house and undid months' worth of careful, patient organizing so I could try to live something like a decent, normal life. I should have applied for jobs today. I should have worked on my project that could actually turn into a job if I really try hard. I should have done normal cleaning like laundry and dishes and showering. I should have run a few errands and gotten some fresh air. I should have read one of the many books I'm half way through. Just one of any of these things would have justified getting out of bed today. I should have done anything at all to just inch my life forward a little bit, to just try to be a little bit better than I was yesterday. But instead I'm just still living an endless repetitive day that started sometime when I was in my 30s, or my 20s, or when a was a child, a day I will never get to the end of because I can't complete anything. I can never get to the next step of anything. No wonder my family talks to me like I'm still the same laughably stunted and incompetent 12 year old they had to carry through life decades ago, it makes me mad that they won't treat me like an adult with real thoughts and feelings but actually I totally deserve it because from the day I was born nothing has changed. I'm still just lying around pissing my pants and wondering how I got all wet.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

My ex is not well. We broke up 2 years ago, but because they have really severe mental health problems, including dissociative identity disorder and addiction issues, they've always relied on me to support them. When we lived together I payed their portion of the rent about 60% of the time, when I told them they had to move out on their own but they couldn't afford an apartment, I let them stay with me. I work in healthcare so I've gotten them resources for mental health services and health insurance to help cover it. I even paid out of pocket for 3 months of online therapy services at one point. As they've struggled with housing, I've found them resources to help pay rent or shelters to go to. They've never utilized these resources, not even the therapy.

We stayed friends, at least sort of, because there were alters that I did enjoy spending time with, even though I didn't get along with a few of them. But now that friendship has completely dissolved. I'm just their caretaker at this point, and I'm barely hanging on. I currently live in a studio apartment, but they were fired at the end of May for missing work. When stuff like that happens, it's either because they were in a severe depressive state or because they forgot with the dissociative identity disorder. They really need to be on disability, but because they can't keep a job, they've never had health insurance or the money to get this kind of protection, so all of their care has fallen on me. So I set up a cot for them under my lofted bed, and they've been staying here since.

But it hasn't been easy, and I haven't always been nice. I've gotten more angry with them than I should have for things that probably allotted some frustration, but not to the level I seem to find myself giving them. Sometimes I raise my voice at them or will tell them they're behaving like a child for leaving their dishes for me to clean or their trash on the floor for me to clean up or trying to make me wash and fold their laundry for them or leaving their piss on the toilet seat and their blood in the sink when they cut themselves shaving. It's not fair, I know, and I feel like a dick about it. I can't handle having no privacy and no space to myself and I get really sensory overloaded by crowded spaces and messes. I don't want to use that as an excuse, but it just sort of happens to me. I've explained this to them, and I've written out rules they have to follow, I have a written and signed agreement stating these are the conditions for them to continue living here, but none of it matters. Their presence is turning me into a monster because I can't take care of an adult who won't help themselves and take care of my patients and be in school and care for a cat in a 200 square foot apartment.

I finally kicked them out a few days ago. They have no money, no job, no friends or family to turn to. I'm the only person in their life, even though I've tried to get them to make friends or contact their family for help. I've even reached out to their family to see if they would be willing to help, but none of them are willing to help them. They just can't care for themselves. It's been two days since I told them they had to leave, because we'd agreed they'd pay me a small amount of rent until they could move out and they haven't been, and also because, even though they try to clean up after themselves occasionally, they just generally don't seem to care that another person lives here, like theyll finish a roll of toilet paper and not replace it, even though the toilet paper is directly next to the toilet, or they'll fill the garbage can until it's overflowing while I'm at work and won't take it out, to the point the the cabinet my garbage can is in will also be filled with trash. And then because it's a studio, they just stare at me all the time. I wake up in the morning and can feel them watching me, when I sit and do homework they just stand behind me and stare, even when I tell them I'm uncomfortable and they have to find something else to do. When I tell them they need to leave the apartment for a while while I work, they slam doors and, when they're not in a nonverbal state, they'll yell at me for it. But if I tell them that they need to, at the very least, put their garbage in the trash instead of piling it under the cot or wash their dishes, they just sit with their head between their knees and won't move for hours.

But at the same time, it's been 2 days since I told them they had to leave, and both nights they've still slept here because they got scared and wouldn't try to get a bed in the nearby homeless shelter, or because they told me they tried to jump in front of a train and I told them to come home so I could watch them until we could get them to the emergency room for suicidal ideation. And of course, as soon as we agreed that was the plan, they said no, they're actually fine, they just have to keep trying and they'll be ok. I work in the ER as a tech, so I know I can't take them in if they refuse to go, and especially not if they'll get there and deny anything is wrong. They play a healthy person well because they've learned the game with social workers, so if I take them to the ER, they'll end up with a huge bill they can't pay, and they won't get any help either.

I can't live with them, and I can't seem to let them leave because of this misplaced sense of duty to them. But I also worry, as I'm telling them they can stay but still getting angry that they're here, am I just inviting them in to hurt them? Should I be kicking them out for their own sake? AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[mourntheantagonist]

I think that Steve and Billy turn into this super domestic couple when the summer of ‘85 hits. It’s the first time Billy can remember ever having so much freedom. Of course it’s not total freedom, and Neil still remains a looming threat, but Billy’s out of the house more than he’s inside it, and Neil doesn’t question where he’s going when he grabs his keys from the ledge. Billy graduated and has a job. He’s doing exactly what his dad expects of him, and the simple fact of him being a true adult grants him a lot of extra time outside his responsibilities.

Which means Billy spends a lot of time at Steve’s. Like. A lot.

He can only vaguely remember the last meal he ate at his house. It was just a week and a half after he graduated when he had an early shift and made himself some toast before heading out the door. He hadn’t had family dinner as he was normally working during that time. And when he wasn’t, well, he might’ve bent the truth about his work schedule those days.

He and Steve both got off work at similar times, clocking out just as the sun was beginning to set. Usually the person who was getting off last would pick up food from a local restaurant or fast food joint. They never really cared to have anything fancy. Steve practically lived off fast food since his parents started traveling more. Billy was the opposite. They never ate out. Not when he was a kid, and especially not after his mom left the picture. It was always the most bland home cooked meals or TV dinners.

Sometimes they’d cook for themselves, but it was rare. But those were some of the best nights. The two of them struggling to follow their way through Steve’s mom’s cookbook recipe, Steve not being able to tell apart the teaspoon and the tablespoon to save his life. Billy burning whatever was put in front of him without fail. Steve would insist Billy could burn a chicken breast without even having the stove turned on. Those nights were always spent giggling and frantically fanning the smoke detector as it went off every twenty seconds. Those nights they’d sit together in front of the TV trying their damndest to chew through overdone steak before admitting defeat and calling in an order for pizza.

He can’t remember the last time he did a chore at his house. He used to always have to help Susan with the dishes after dinner, but he was never there and eventually that task fell to Max. And speaking of Max, he didn’t have the responsibility of babysitting anymore, as she was going to be entering high school in the fall and everyone agreed she was old enough to look after herself. Billy still was expected to look out for her, but Billy never had to be told to protect her. He did that on his own.

With him having a job, Neil didn’t expect him to do things around the house. He was simply happy enough to be getting a third of Billy’s paycheck every month.

But Billy was sure he’d be happy if he knew Billy was still busying himself with chores anyway.

He always helped Steve out. They would take turns taking the trash out to the curb every week, they would do dishes together, they’d sit together on the floor in a pile of clean laundry and fold it together while something played on the TV—

Hell, he can’t remember the last time he did laundry at his house. Practically two-thirds of his clothes have wound up at Steve’s house. He even had his own set of drawers and a space in Steve’s closet.

Billy can’t even remember the last time he took a shower in his own house, because since summer hit he has only ever showered at the pool after work, or in Steve’s bathroom, where he’s never alone.

It was one thing he never knew he was missing until he had it—Steve standing with his arms wrapped around him, letting the hot water soak the both of them. Washing each other’s backs and just getting clean in each other’s presence. Billy used to see showering as his few moments of peace throughout his day, but he definitely didn’t mind having Steve there with him. Especially when they made the decision to rack up the water bill and stay in there a little while longer…

Billy still slept at his house sometimes, but that was only on nights when he had to. Usually when Steve’s parents were back in town or when a considerable amount of time had passed that may have deemed suspicious. Neil would believe the idea that Billy was spending the night at a girls house. However, he wouldn’t believe he was spending night after night at the same girls house, and there were only so many girls in Hawkins to keep up his charade.

So there were still days he’d come home at night and sleep in his own bed, that was notably no where near as comfortable as Steve’s. Billy wasn’t sure if it had to do with the mattress or just the warmth that came with having Steve there next to him. But on those nights spent without Steve, he didn’t stay for long. He come home early enough to make his presence known, but never too early he had to spend any more time not in bed than he had to. When he slept at home that was all he did. He slept. The only time he did anything more was when he’d stop by Max’s room on his way in and out, just to check in.

He was glad he didn’t do that often, because sleeping at Steve’s was the best. With Steve he wasn’t afraid of the dark anymore. He didn’t jump at every creak in the house. Steve made him feel safe. Billy never imagined that he’d enjoy sleeping with Steve in the most literal sense more than sleeping with Steve in the figurative.

Of course he enjoyed that too. God he enjoyed that. But it wasn’t everything that they did together. When they were still in highschool, that was all it started out with. They never hung out without sex as a promise. They were nothing short of the horny teenagers all the movies warn you about.

But now, with the showers and the chores and the meals and the shared bed and shared closet and giggling in the kitchen…they aren’t that anymore.

They are proper boyfriends. They’re a couple, a pair, a duo.

They turned into this and summer isn’t even halfway over. It’s only the end of June.

Who knows what the rest of the summer has to offer…

[talltoontales]

Don't Tapping the Glass!

Prompt: ANGER

Prompt by: Me

Started Writing: 05/31/2024

[WARNING: Heavy Feelings]

|| || || || || || || || || ||

Another one of those days.

I pull into the driveway after another long day at my minimum-wage job. Stuff left unfinished, customers & co-workers left pissed, and so many more problems left to solve.

“Put it behind you.” “Leave work at work.”

If I could, I would have by now, but…I dunno. I’m just not built like that. I pull out my phone and open up the manager's group chat. Where I spend the next thirty minutes texting, reliving the horribly eventful day in several large text blocks. Making sure the opening crew has a chance for a better morning. I look back on my day with a microscope to make sure I didn’t overlook any missed task, irate customer, or time-consuming task. Surprise! Surprise! This doesn’t make me feel any better.

You’d think after I’d send the text it would be over, heh. Nope, now I have to look at tomorrow and plan for all the problems that it’ll bring. I end up just slumped in my car, going through all of the worst possible futures and how to prevent them.

“Why do you work so hard for a terrible job?” “They don’t deserve real estate in your head.”

On my better days, I’d joke, saying something like, “I gotta switch, not a dial. It’s either one hundred percent or zero.” But I haven’t had too many “better” days for a while now. In all honesty, when I go to work, I go to work, I feel bad getting paid to just stand around and do nothing, even if I barely get paid. Plus, my associates deserve at least one good boss or one who tries to be good. I finally drag myself out of my car and make my way to the front door.

-Doctor’s appointments, car payments, school, family, friends (or lack thereof), groceries-

It’s amazing how, in the span of just under a minute, the human mind can speed-run through all of my problems, worries, and frustrations.

I get to the dimly lit front door, and I just stare at it.

-Laundry, cooking, dishes, self-care, all those shows I wanted to watch, reading, writing, having a proper sleep schedule-

Just more problems that other people don’t see as problems. I go inside, hang up my keys, grab another canned meal, and eat while watching a video on my phone—until I get a call from my mom.

Give her credit, she knows her son. Always calling just to make sure I’m ok, and like always, I lie and say I’m fine. She knows I’m lying, but what can she do? She talks about her day, and my brain does its job.

-She’s overworking herself, family problems, dad in his own world…again. I should spend more time with them-

The call never lasts too long unless I make it, and I never do. I can’t, I have to be back at work soon.

Teeth brushed, face washed, don’t smell, time for…lying awake in silence and being left alone with my thoughts.

// // // // // // // // // //

I don’t know, or I can’t really remember the last time I was happy. Like I said, I had better days, and I’ll probably have better days in the future, but I want to be happy. I don’t want to feel like I have to survive the next day, and I don’t want to see just all the problems I can't fix. I think back through my life, trying to find where I went wrong.

Maybe it wasn’t my fault, maybe I could have fixed it, had a better life, a life that would have made me happy. A life where I could deal with my problems like a functioning adult. A life where I don’t feel alone even in a room full of people who love me and want me to succeed.

But I know there’s nothing I can do now, just like there was nothing I could have done then. All I’m doing is fixing problems that were never meant to be fixed. Then why am I doing it? Why do I keep going through life, past, present, and future, looking for problems? Why do I keep doing this to myself?

\\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\

For the past few years, anytime I get angry, and I mean “nearing the breaking point,” angry, I have what I can only describe as a waking dream.

I’m walking down concrete steps into a cold, dark, basement-type room. Once I reach the bottom, a light turns on revealing a glass wall splitting the room in half. On the other side of the wall, is dim light. The other side of the room is covered in shredded paper with writing on it, the walls have deep scratches in them, and the glass is covered in smudges as if someone was wiping their hands against it.

There’s no one on the other side of the glass, no doors or windows to enter or escape from, just me. I look along the glass, seeing cracks in the wall where it meets the glass. I put a hand on the glass, it feels hot. Not enough to be painful but far from comfortable. I look closer at the paper on the ground, and some of it looks scrunched up like it was covered in water at some point. Both lights flicker off for a second. Once they’re back on, the smudges on the glass move, now looking like someone was dragging their hand towards me.

It doesn’t take a genius to know what’s behind the glass or what IT wants. It doesn’t care whose fault it is or why I’m here, it just wants to be free to do its job. But it knows I won’t let it. it knows that I fear what it could become if I let it out. I felt the glass push against my hand as if pressure was building on the other side, but it doesn’t phase me. As I walk away, I hear frantic thumping as it wails on the glass. Once, I get to the stairs I turn around for one last look, and scratched into the walls hundreds of times over is the same word:

!!!YELL!!!

It’s not a threat or an order. It’s a plea. It took me years and one mental breakdown to understand what I’ve done and what I still do to this day. Maybe I should give myself more credit. Maybe it would be okay if only for a while. Maybe it was always my fault I felt this way. But then, what would happen to me if I let it out? Could I forgive myself for what I’ve done?

...

I walk up the stairs. The banging continues but fades as I leave, only the faint sound of crying can be heard as I reach the final steps. At the end of all of that, I wake up. I don’t feel better, I just feel numb, but it’s better than walking around angry.

. . . . . . . . . .

Hey... So, peek behind the curtain time. If you haven't guessed, I'm not in the best place emotionally. If it helps, I'm not as bad as I used to be. So, progress! I've never felt in control of my life, and what little I do have control over never feels like it matters. Some days I just feel like I'm just floating through life, never making an impact on anyone or anything. Does wonders for my self-worth. And before anyone says anything, I know packing that stuff down is not even slightly healthy for me, but I've just never felt like I was in a safe enough space to unpack any of it. But I wanted to try anyway. so I wrote this. Didn't feel great putting my emotional baggage out on the curb for anyone to look at, but...I'm just tired of all of this just being in my head.

Aaaaaaaaanyway, Thanks for reading, and I hope you...enjoyed the story. If you have any comments, critiques, or criticisms, please don't be afraid to let me hear 'em (as long as they're constructive). Also, if you have some spare time, check out my blog for more stories like the one above. Stay safe, drink plenty of water, and, now more than ever, be kind to yourself and others. We all could use more kindness in the world. See you next time.

[chreecher]

Sometimes I think the way I acted when things ended with them makes me a bad person. Not often, but sometimes.

You see I left behind everything and everyone else I loved for this person. I left behind my dream job, my best friend and plp, my first and best adult friend group, the town I loved, even my safety. I moved from Washington to Texas.

I believed when they said they'd changed and things would be different this time, that they wouldn't threaten to leave or leave me behind constantly or treat me badly. I was wrong.

It was the worst three months of my life, until after they left me. Then it was the worst year of my life.

Before I moved they pressured me into signing a lease on an apartment that was much larger than I needed and more than I could afford. They said they would never come visit me or stay the night if I didn't get at least a 2*1 and a studio was unthinkable, they'd pay half the rent, I'd be fine.

They never payed a cent, but they did live there for free, criticize my decorations and make me take them down, shitted on me for having pictures of my dead loved ones in our bedroom, and locked me out in the cold more than once.

I couldn't find a job after I moved, I never realized how bad the economy is in Texas until I was trapped in a podunk ass town where there were no jobs. They never let me forget for a second that my unemployment was bothering them.

They invited me to their home for Christmas. I was so excited to finally meet their family, until they cancelled my invite only a couple weeks out from the trip. It broke my heart. I spent almost the entire time they were gone in bed or crying.

I know they would say "but I flew your best friend out, you said you'd be fine."

Both of those things are true.

When they got back the apartment was wrecked. Dishes in the sink, dirty laundry in the bedroom. The trash needed taken out, the cat box emptied.

They'd already made it clear that any amount of mess was intolerable, even a few dishes in the sink overnight would sour their mood and leave them constantly criticizing and demeaning me.

Their dad couldn't stand even the tiniest amount of disorder, and it traumatized them, so naturally any time I failed to keep things spotless, they lost their shit.

I felt terrible when I opened the door and saw them, because I knew they were going to clean it up and that they'd be angry at me about it. I apologized profusely and tried to take care of it before bed that night.

I didn't finish it, they did. They made me feel awful about it. Like always.

They invited my friend to join us in some light kink play. (They were acespec and never played with me before or after.) They spent that scene showering affection and praise on her, and ignoring me while I cried into the carpet about it.

My friend went home.

They later told me it was my fault for giggling when they spanked me.

I could tell they were pulling away again, planning to dump me.

I asked.

They said they'd never leave me, they were in love with me, no I wasn't too sick to be loveable, they'd always be there.

Two weeks later they dumped me.

They continued to live in my apartment, posted up in the living room on the phone with my best friend all day playing video games.

They told me my presence in the living room was too disturbing for them to enjoy their games, could I go somewhere else?

I was suicidal. I'm not proud of how I asked for help.

I texted my best friend and told her I wanted to fucking die, her refusal to support or talk to me while being constantly available for them was hurtful, but "hey at least you two are having fun, right?"

I didn't know it, but they were facetiming when she read that message. My ex burst into the room, yelling at me for "threatening suicide" and it became a huge fight.

It ended when they said they still loved me, citing the purchase of a Dr pepper milkshake as proof of their love, and I responded with "you have a funny way of showing it." After all, they'd just dumped me, told me my autism and ADHD made me unbearable to be around, compared me to an autistic little boy they used to babysit, and claimed continuing to date me made them feel like a pedophile. I didn't feel loved.

I felt used and abandoned, again.

They had a "panic attack" that lasted 2+ hours, and absolutely HAD to have my plp on the phone with them the entire time. I squashed my feelings down to try and help them through the crisis.

In return my attempts to be supportive were labelled as intrusive and inconsiderate. They finally left and went back on base.

They said they wanted to stay my friend.

They said they'd help with my rent (they never did).

They told my best friend every detail of our past, an got angry that I hadn't done the same.

Nevermind that I don't remember highschool, never mind that we were both in the wrong, never mind that they left me over and over and over again, never mind that they always came back and apologized and told me they forgave me and it was forgotten.

No, only that I'd left a few times too, that I hurt them, that I was a bad person, bad friend, bad partner.

I told them I didn't tell anyone that stuff. I told them it was because we both did shitty things to eachother (like when they coerced me into a poly relationship I didnt want or know how to handle, like when I changed my number so they'd never be able to contact me again and caved a year later, texted and asked if it was them)

They told me to never speak to them ever again, and started a messy situationship with my best friend days later.

So

I stole an 800$ mattress they left in my apartment. I did not reach out to return it, and when less than 9 months later I had to flee Texas because my new landlord threatened to rape me and leave me in a ditch, I took it with me.

They threatened to sue me about six months after I got to Tennessee if I didn't pay back 500$ for the mattress. I resisted and then I paid it, and called them a blackmailer.

I needed to be the bad guy, this time. I needed to be "that bitch that stole my mattress." I needed to be fucking unforgivable, because every time they left me broken, they'd come back a year or 8months later and apologize and say they were wrong, they loved me, they'd changed, couldn't I give them just one chance to show it?

And I believed them every time, even when it wrecked my life.

Even when it meant leaving behind everything and everyone I loved for them, I believed it.

I couldn't trust myself not to fall for it, so I trusted them to hate me until they die.

Does that make me a bad person?

[frogsandfries]

Payyyeeeeedaaayyyyeeeeee! So I bought a couple cases of ensure, and I've been fucking around with Amazon, so I didn't get the mattress yet but I'm soooooo freaking excited to have a mattress--my own mattress! A decade into my adult life!

Okay, look, I have many good reasons to never have owned my own mattress: Living in shelters, motels, pre-furnished units, or sleeping on floors and couches, or living with people who already had a mattress that I was welcome to. Okay?

I try not to frame this shit entirely onto myself anymore. If you turned eighteen and your family was homeless, you wouldn't be having a very blazing start to adulthood yourself.

While that person was abusive, I'm grateful to have had some one person in my life, sooner than later, who laid the path in front of me for me to claim my own stability.

It was really tempting, with a big ole chunk of change in hand, to get everything--the office rug I wanted, plus the other cat bowl I need to get, the room divider that I need for my stupid job, pillows, some desperately needed pants (it's always pants wtf). But the cats will be fine eating off this tote; I'll survive without a rug. I just need a couple items; I need some money left for groceries as I get ideas throughout the next couple weeks for meals that I'd like. I can't go without internet, and I'm going to make another attempt at getting a desperately needed new phone either tomorrow or Saturday.

I'd eventually like a new cup with a lid, but I could probably get a decent one from the dollar store. It's gotta be a biiiig cup, because I often forget to fill it on my breaks and talking all day, with how arid it is where I live, and how hot the apartment can get later in the afternoon....... also, my water filtererer is like, twenty-some cups, apparently, and I swear I'm in the fridge constantly filling that thing. Hydration? Not an issue here, but it will be if I don't have anything to flavor my water with. Not sure how much longer I have left on this can of drink powder, since I don't remember when I got it, but can I drink something else besides just pink lemonade 😵‍💫🤢 Not if I blow all my money on apartment stuff.

Besides, I think I can always find something else to buy for the apartment: Silverware organizer, some kind of cat-proof barrier for the kitchen (my dummy boy got stuck behind the stove, and the pilot light constantly heats the whole cooktop, which is disturbing), storage for my bedroom, new bedding, storage cubes for my clothes, maybe eventually a rug for my bed, bookshelves, organizers for my creative workspace, a proper dish set that I won't really use by myself, to prove that I'm definitely an adult, more corkboards, more foamcore to mount the corkboards onto, more diamond paintings that I'll probably just never finish...... Maybe eventually a couch cover just to spice things up. A different chair for being not at work, maybe a laptop or computer so I can download entertainment. More dishes. I could always use like, more toilet paper, a new bath towel, hand soap, body soap, laundry soap, dish soap, cat litter--you can literally never have enough cat litter. Which reminds me, I also don't own a vacuum. That's going to take some real determination to get the one I want.

Ugh....... I've been thinking about a new office chair. Like, obsessively. While I want my desk to be higher, I want my chair just the slightest bit lower. At its lowest, in this chair, my feet do not comfortably touch the ground and my hips won't let me forget it. But...... there are soooooooooooo many options. How do I know if the chair I get will be lower than this one? How do I know if it will be comfortable enough? What if it's too hot? How do I know if it will be worth the money? What if I buy a knee-chair and I hate it? Do I just go straight for a gaming chair? Is that overkill?

Anyway, the point is, I'm obviously no minimalist. I can always think of more things to purchase to customize my living space, and coming from basically zero a decade in to my life as an adult, fully, legally and financially responsible for myself........I don't have a whole lot. This apartment doesn't have a whole lot of storage. My shit is mostly still packed up. I didn't have any intention of moving this year. The more I'm caused to move when I would rather not, the more I'm going to start digging my heels in. I would rather do anything than move next year, or in five years. Maybe by five years, I'll have the stomach for packing again. I have plenty of time, plenty of money, to invest into my home, my comfort, my existence. And I don't have to balance against anyone else, at least for a long, long time........ if ever...... I'm so awful at even just making friends...... sigh.

As for money for hobbies and such, it's probably fine for now. I really don't know what to do as far as coloring the graphic novel. I honestly need some kind of feedback, because this digital thing is not working. I've already made like ten sketchbooks, which is waaaaay overkill. I don't really have any other hobbies. I don't really have much time for any other hobbies.

I'm making really good progress on my linework just squeezing it in at work, don't tell the client 🤭

I'm seriously wondering if I could actually color better with colored pencils......

Anyway, I should probably go to bed...... tomorrow is Friday.

[evanescentjoy]

1 Year Post High School

Today is June 10, 2023. I graduated high school one year ago today. I graduated without sending a single college application in, no job, and absolutely no idea what I want to do with my life. My parents have been pretending to be supportive of my decision, but I know they’re disappointed in me.

They won’t help me, and I feel alone through all of it. In this past year, I’ve figured out what I want to major in, and where I want to go. But I have NO support. I’m just supposed to do it all by myself. Plus, they’re too busy trying to one up each other.

“Come live with me. It’ll be better than your mother’s.”

“Your father is useless, and doesn’t actually care.”

Thank you so much parents. I love my sisters, but they’re so selfish sometimes. My older sister is in college and couldn’t give less of a fuck about anyone but herself. (Which is so ironic because my parents have done everything for her for 21 years.) My younger sister lives in some fantasy world where she doesn’t have to help with anything because she “does so much.” Newsflash, boiling water for pasta is not difficult, you’re 16. I know I need to help around the house, but that shouldn’t mean cooking every meal, cleaning all the dishes, doing everyone’s laundry, and taking care of my verbally abusive grandfather.

It hurts me so much that I get no acknowledgment from my family because I’m just expected to do it. My mother, the adult, thinks I, an 18 year old, should do everything. I get the excuse that she has to work, my sister has school. I’ve been doing this for 3 years. 2 of those years I was also in school.

I also went from having a few friends to 0, and I’m not exaggerating (I graduated with a friend group of me and 4 girls). I did my best to text them and try to stay in contact, which I have trouble with (because I think everyone secretly hates me), but I got no texts back. One friend I had graduated yesterday, and I texted her about coming to her graduation. She never responded so I didn’t go, but I sent her a card and a gift.

I opened Instagram this morning to see the other 3 girls in our friend group were there together. I don’t know what I did to them, but I guess what they say about high school friendships is true. This was definitely a wake up call for me.

I’m sitting here writing this, doing my absolute best to take control of my future. I have a horribly habit of living in the last, because I don’t like change. But, I have a plan.

Step 1- Enroll in online classes for the upcoming school year.

Step 2- Move into my dad’s house (Not to one up my mom, but to have a clean, quiet environment to do schoolwork in).

Step 3- Get a job and my license.

Step 4- Move on.

I’m 18 years old. A high school graduate. And the world is my oyster. I need to fight to move on and start a new chapter. I’ve learned I’m also not alone in these feelings.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you. If you can relate, know you’re not alone. Hopefully there’ll be a positive update to this soon.

[alanacare]

NDIS Household Tasks

The household tasks NDIS category provides you with support from experienced NDIS providers in a range of essential domestic chores at whichever level you require.

These services are a great way to build your independence, while maintaining your home and garden. They are also an essential part of your NDIS support plan.

Cleaning

Cleaning is a big part of any household. It helps to know what to do and when, and a good cleaning routine can make life easier for everyone. The most basic chores, like vacuuming and dusting, should be done daily, whereas more involved jobs, such as scrubbing the bathroom grout or rearranging the dining room table, require a little more thought. You should also plan for seasonal cleaning projects, such as spring and fall gutter cleanouts and seasonal weeding of the garden.

There are many ways to go about it, but the best way to accomplish your cleaning goals is to create a master cleaning schedule, including daily, weekly and monthly tasks for each family member. This will help keep your sanity, and your house in pristine condition. It's also a great way to stay on top of the latest trends in cleaning technology, such as green cleaning products, eco-friendly home cleaning solutions and hygienic laundry methods.

Meal Preparation

Getting in the kitchen to prepare meals is an important part of a healthy lifestyle. It saves time, reduces stress and encourages nutrient-rich, healthy meals.

Typically, meal prep involves planning and shopping for a week of meals before cooking them. It can also involve making large batches to freeze or refrigerate, preparing ingredients for multiple dishes at once and portioning out foods as needed.

Overall, meal preparation is an important household task for most people. It can be time consuming, but it can be done with the right strategies.

Among households that included at least one adult, about three-quarters of women (76%) and two-in-ten men (20%) said they were the usual meal preparers. Dads were about twice as likely to say they split these tasks equally with other family members.

Meal Delivery

When you’re busy with work, kids and other household tasks, finding time to grocery shop, cook and clean up can be hard. But a meal delivery service is an easy way to get high-quality meals on the table without all of that stress.

In addition to helping you avoid trips to the supermarket, these services also save you a lot of time. They usually deliver meals that are ready to heat in just a few minutes, allowing you to spend less time cooking and more time relaxing.

Many of these services offer a variety of options to help you meet your nutrition goals on a weekly basis, including vegan, gluten-free, keto and paleo diets. These meal kits can also make it easier to regulate your fat, sugar and carbs on a regular basis.

Shopping

Shopping is a popular household activity that involves the purchase of a variety of goods and services. These may be sold in stores such as retail and grocery stores, online through e-commerce, or over the phone with catalogues or telemarketers.

The act of shopping can be a fun and educational experience for children, who have the opportunity to learn about different types of products and how they can be used to complete their own projects. Some examples of shopping worthy activities include choosing the best coffee shop for your java fix, visiting the nearby mall to peruse the latest trends in home decor and fashion, or scouring the internet for the best deals on household items like toys and clothing.

It is not uncommon for children to be dazzled by the many options and gizmos available at their fingertips, or to be swayed by a TV advertisement featuring an enticing sales pitch. The best way to ensure your child is not swayed is to make them responsible for their own task list by assigning a specific task and setting a timer. This will help the children learn to manage their own errands, and also teach them about the importance of accountability.

[silenceofthecookies]

Hello cookie, congratulations on 700! For the event, can I plz ask for domestic headcanons for the bleach captains? If not that's ok! Thank you!

Of course! Enjoy!

Shunsui Kyouraku

Shunsui is at the age where he no longer plays around in a relationship. He's in it until the end, or not at all. He insists on open an honest communication and on being able to talk differences out like adults instead of screaming at each other like two stubborn teenagers.

He will do pretty much anything you ask him to do in the house. Captain or not, you shouldn't be the only one keeping your house clean and organized.

Waking up with a bad mood when living together with Shunsui is impossible. He prefers to have you in his arms when going to sleep, and he will hold on to you throughout the night. When he wakes up, he'll stay as still as possible until you wake up. Then it's time for morning kisses and cuddles.

Shunsui enjoys stargazing with you in the garden, accompanied by a nice bottle of sake and some snacks. He'll have his arms around you, or even have you sitting on his lap if you're comfortable with that, just so he can comfortably hug you and still watch the stars.

Juushiro Ukitake

Due to his illness, Juushiro can't do all that much in the house on bad days. On good days though, he likes to take the opportunity to cook for you. He enjoys is and is very good at making typical home-food. Nothing fancy or exotic, but the kind of things that are nutritious and make you feel happy.

Juushiro enjoys being near you more than anything. It doesn't matter if you two are doing different things in the same room, as long as you are near him and sometimes look up to smile at him, he will be happy. This is why he insists on getting a house with an open kitchen.

He also likes to decorate the house with lots of potted plants. Flowers to brighten up the room, some herbs for in the kitchen to cook with, and some bonsai trees for him to occupy himself with on days when he can't leave his bed.

He really enjoys you combing his hair, and if possible, he will gladly return the favour. Ideally, he'll sit in front of a big mirror when you do so, so he can look you in the eyes though the mirror as he talks to you. You can style his hair pretty much anyway you want.

Bakuya Kuchiki

Byakuya does what he can to be a good boyfriend/husband, but he is and will always be a noble. Things like housework is done by the servants, not by him. This counts for you too, of course. You won't need to lift a finger. He won't really understand if you want to do certain things in the house anyway (be it for the sake of control or just because you like something), but he'll let you.

Well-taught as he is, Byakuya wouldn’t be able to cook a meal if his life depended on it. He never learned how to cook, and he has no intention of learning it either.

Despite his busy schedule, he tries to have dinner with you every night. It’s not always possible, and sometimes when it is he has to go back to finish work afterwards, but he wants to make some time for you every day.

He will often get you little gifts. Flowers, chocolates, jewellery… Sometimes because he saw them and thought of you, sometimes just because he wanted to spoil you a little. Whenever he has something to apologise for, like for example not being able to make it to dinner with you, he gets you something as well.

Unohana, Shinji, Yoruichi, Urahara, Toshiro, Soi-Fohn and Kenpachi below the cut!

Retsu Unohana

Retsu's house is full of plants, and it wouldn't be complete without a garden as well. Most plants that she grows have some kind of medicinal properties, or can be used to make a nice, calming cup of tea. Teatime is a must, and if the weather allows it, she prefers to have it in her garden.

The plants are pretty much the only bright colours in the house. Aside from those, everything is in soft colours so the plants really pop out. There's also very little dark colours in the house, she prefers everything to be light. Big windows/windows that cover a complete wall are a must.

Retsu insists on no shoes in the house. They are left at the door and changed for indoor slippers or socks. No. Dirty. Shoes. In. The. House.

Marriage is no big deal for Retsu. If you want to get married, she'll be on board, but if you don't want to, she's just as fine with that as well. She appreciates the symbolism but at the end of the day, that's all marriage is. She doesn't need a piece of paper to tell people that she loves you and that she wants to spend the rest of her life with you.

Shinji Hirako

Shinji loves teasing you and once you live in the same house, that just gets worse. His terribly cheesy sense of humor is also still a daily occurrence. Yes, even when you're in a bad mood. Especially when you're in a bad mood.

Shinji is very lazy when it comes to his household. He'll make sure it's clean enough to not get sick from living in his own trash and dirt, but he'll push his chores off a lot and he'll leave his stuff lying around throughout the house. If you're a person who likes a clean and/or tidy house, you'll either have to kick his ass or clean up after him.

Surprise kisses. They happen a lot in general, just when he feels like it, but especially when you're in a video chat. He thinks it's hilarious to have your friends/family/co-workers think you have a perfect and loving boyfriend/husband, while he's actually a cheeky little bastard.

He leaves little notes throughout the house when he leaves. Some are sweet, some are jokes. He'll put them in the fridge, on the toilet, inside the shower, on his pillow,… anywhere he knows you'll come.

Yoruichi Shihoin

There is one night of the week dedicated to movie night and takeout. Both the eating and watching the movie will be done in bed. No, this is not up for debate. Lazy movie nights in bed are a must.

Be prepared for this woman wearing little to no clothes when she's home. She doesn't give a damn if people see her naked or not, and you're living together anyway, who cares if she's naked? Clothes are for going outside and for when visitors come over.

She loves taking baths or showers together as well, and not (necessarily) in a suggestive way. It's just a nice way to relax together, ‘and it saves water, right? *wink wink*’

She's actually a pretty good cook, at least when it comes to comfort food. When either of you are in a bad mood she'll step into the kitchen and make some of the best comfort food you've ever had. Which will then, of course, be eaten on the couch or in bed, in front of the tv, with a comfort movie.

Her favourite movies are comedies and romcoms. Anything that'll give her a good laugh is fine.

Kisuke Urahara

Another very laid-back person to live with. There is no rush at all when living with this man, with anything. He's the type of person to be at least a little late to every party or meeting because he just wanted to take his time and get ready in a relaxed way.

Don't let him take care of plants. He is the worst plant dad and they will die. Only cacti survive, and even those will struggle to do so.

Kisuke moves around in his sleep a lot and will steal the covers. A good way to remedy this is to use his chest as a pillow, he'll barely move at all then. Does the pressure on his chest really keep him still, or did he move around a lot on purpose as an excuse to get to you cuddle up to him at night? You will never know.

This man is very clingy. It doesn't matter what you're doing, he wants to have his arms around you. You're cooking? His arms are around your waist. You're trying to clean up? Good luck. His favourite moment is when you're both watching tv though. He'll pull you as close to possible to cuddle up on the couch.

Toshiro Hitsugaya

Toshiro has the windows open all-year round in his bedroom. Even when it is freezing outside, he'll want to open the windows for some fresh air as he sleeps, so he doesn't wake up in that stuffy sleep air that gets stuck in bedrooms. This does give a great excuse for cuddling while sleeping though.

He'll get you flowers every week, on the same day. It's a habit, one he doesn't want to miss. It's his way of reminding you that he cares, even though he's usually very busy with his work as a captain.

He'll agree a schedule with you to do chores in the house, just to make sure it all gets done and nothing gets forgotten. Of course, he helps in the house as well.

If you're not a fighter, Toshiro will want a dog in the house to protect you. Toshiro is very good at training dogs, as he is already used to being a leader and giving orders, and this dog will be the sweetest thing until either you or him give it the command to attack. He really counts on the dog to protect you when he cannot.

Soi-Fohn

Soi-Fohn will decorate her home in a minimalistic way. The colours don't jump out at you and there is just enough decoration to make it feel homely without having trinkets and pictures all over the place. Her home basically radiates calm and is so clean you'd almost wonder if she cleaned every day.

She sleeps with a lot of blankets. During the night she will want to say warm and she'll get closer to any source of warmth, which usually is you.

You need but say the word and Soi-Fohn will help you out with whatever she can in the house. Grocery shopping, the dishes, the laundry,… you name it. She will also start doing things without saying it if she notices you are a little overwhelmed.

She REALLY wants a cat. She loves the little creatures and has always wanted one of her own, but due to her often being away from home for extended periods of time, she never got one. If you've got a job that allows you to go home every day, she'll definitely bring it up.

Of het days off, she likes to cook something for you. She's actually a pretty good cook, though she rarely has the time to prepare something special for you.

Kenpachi Zaraki

Kenpachi is oddly clingy when you're home. He loves you, so he wants to be around you. Preferably have an arm around you. He's not shy about admitting it either. Why should he be? He wants to hold you. He's your boyfriend/husband. It's only normal.

He is the easiest guy ever to cook for. As long as you have made it, Kenpachi will eat about anything. Doesn't matter if you burnt it a little, doesn't matter if it's something he usually doesn't like. If you made it, he will eat it.

His favourite food is BBQ though, and when you eat BBQ he's the one making it. It's about the only thing he can cook, but that meat is prepared perfectly. He'll wear an apron will some stupid BBQ-related pun on it whenever he's doing so.

Kenpachi needs a dog in the house to play with, to get rid of that excess energy of his. It's likely a breed that's generally seen as dangerous, like a Pitbull. The dog is the absolute sweetest thing though, wouldn't harm a fly, and it loves playing fetch.

Kenpachi lets his dog sleep on his bed, which will cause some funny moments while trying to cuddle because the dog wants in on the affection too.

[innytoes]

For the nice anon who had a bad week and wanted some more Caleb/Ray/Reggie ABO AU. This snippet has been floating in my brain for weeks so I’m using this as an excuse to write it. Hope your weekend is better!

(Trigger warning for some internalised fatphobia and unhealthy thoughts.)

Halloween was Reggie’s absolute favourite holiday. It always had been. It was about dressing up and candy and running around with your friends, not being forced into a tie or pretending to be the perfect family or your parents shouting because everything costs money. An old sheet and a pair of scissors for two eye-holes and you were ready to go.

When Ray and Caleb learned Halloween was his favourite holiday, they went all out. Ray dragged out all his Halloween decor even though it was still summer, so they could go over what he had and what they could add to it. Caleb made sure to schedule his big show for the afternoon, so he could slip out during the after party for their clients and be home with Ray and Reggie in the evening.

And okay, they did talk Reggie down from going Full Spooky as soon as October 1 came around. Instead, he added a little bit every day. A wreath on the door. Some pumpkins on the table. A spooky lawn flamingo in the yard. Some cute ghost-shaped lights on the mantle. An autumn leaf garland on the banister. 

And if Ray maybe came home one day to find his entire porch railing covered in tiny plastic pumpkins, all evenly spaced out (with exactly enough room for Pockets to sit between them, because she loved to sit on the porch railing and judge passers-by), all he did was laugh and press a kiss to Reggie’s cheek and ask him if he had a productive day.

They didn’t just indulge him in the decor. Caleb surprised them both with a visit to a real life pumpkin patch, and they spent a day picking out Real Pumpkins (Reggie) taking a million pictures (Ray) and drinking apple cider (Caleb). They watched all the scary (and not so scary) Halloween movies Reggie wanted to, since he was usually vetoed at the shelter. And okay, sometimes even Reggie had to hide his face in Ray’s sweater, but hearing Caleb mutter under his breath about what bad choices the characters on screen were making made the whole thing a lot less scary and a lot more fun.

Caleb had also impressed upon him that Reggie was in charge of the candy. He did that a lot, making something sound like it was a job or a favour when it was really something fun. Still, with the extra encouragement, he kind of went all out. Full. Sized. Candy. Bars. Baby! As well as a separate bowl with cool stuff like erasers, fake moustaches, light-up bouncy balls, fake spiders, fidget spinners, and other cool stuff, for the kids with allergies.

And if maybe he grabbed a bunch of bags of the tiny little fun-sized candy bars for them to snack on, well, Caleb said he was in charge of candy.

Except he’d made one big mistake. Since he’d never really done Halloween as an adult before, he hadn’t realised how tempting all that candy in the house would be. Not the stuff for the kids, of course. Reggie was fully committed to not touching those, so they had enough to hand out to ever single kid that came over.

But those bags with the tiny little bite-sized candy bars? They were calling him, okay? So, on October 29th, he may or may not have gotten out a bag. Just to grab a few of his favourites while he was finishing up decorating. So he grabbed a bunch after he finished putting up the fake spiderwebs outside. And he grabbed some when he added the spooky fake candles on the tables. And after he was completely done for the day, with both decorating and laundry and the dishes and prepping for dinner, well, he deserved to sit down and have a treat, okay? And then Pockets came to sit on his lap, so it wasn’t like he could go anywhere or do anything but eat candy, right?

By the time he heard the front door, Caleb chuckling at the skulls he’d added to the wreath, he’d pretty much finished the bag. And there was no way to hide the evidence before Caleb reached the family room. Tiny wrappers were all over the salon table, and gathering them all up together kind of just made it look worse.

“Well now,” Caleb said, surveying the scene. God, there were candy wrappers on the floor as well.

“Um, hi.” He tried to smile as Caleb pressed a kiss to his temple.

“Hello, pet,” Caleb said. “Did you... did you eat almost that entire bag by yourself?” He sounded kind of incredulous.

Reggie flushed. Of course Caleb was shocked. “I’ll run a few extra miles tomorrow,” he defended, shrinking in on himself a little.

Maybe Reggie did let himself get carried away. Paul had always said he ate more than his fair share, that he was greedy, and here Reggie was proving him right.

The shelter had always warned that they should do their best to look good, so they’d be picked sooner. They’d always grimaced a little when they said it in front of Reggie, because no amount of deep conditioner and squats was going to hide the massive scar on his face. But still, Reggie knew that Caleb and Ray had picked him, at least in part, because of how he looked. They both took really good care of themselves, and here Reggie was, eating an entire bag of candy in one go.

Caleb looked at him, surprised and a little upset. “Kitten, I’m not concerned about your waistline, I’m concerned about you getting a stomach ache,” he soothed.

Oh.

“And a little bit about you throwing up chocolate on my priceless antique rug,” he said, nodding at the floor. Reggie giggled.

“I promise I won’t get sick on your rug,” he said, leaning into a hug when Caleb offered, tucking his head under Caleb’s chin.

“You know that you’re allowed to eat whatever you want, right?” Caleb asked, rubbing his back gently. Reggie nodded. He did know that. Of course he did. It was just that sometimes the stuff Paul said, or worse, the stuff they drilled into all the Omegas at the shelter, got the better of him. “And that we love you no matter what?”

Reggie took a breath. That one was still a little hard to remember sometimes, on his bad days, or when panic set in. Still, he didn’t want to make Caleb sad, so he nodded again.

Caleb hummed, and they sat there for a moment, just curled up together. Then, Caleb pulled away. “Are there any tootsie rolls left in that bag?”

[simkhira]

I Have 300+ Gameplay Mods?! & Yes, They All Work Together...

Yes, you read that correctly. I have over 300 gameplay mods / overrides in my game. 340 to be exact. & Yes, they all work just fine together. By that I mean hardly any last exceptions / errors. So if you are looking for ways to spice up your game - here you go, sis:

⭐ = my ultimate faves

PLEASE SEE ALL 300+ LINKS ON YOUR MOBILE DEVICE! desktop tumblr won’t let us be great.

BIG DISCLAIMER: Use these mods at your own risk! Just because all 300+ of these mods work for me, does not mean they will work for you. ALSO - when patch day comes, do not refer to this list for the most up-to-date versions of mods… I will only be updating this list when I feel like I need to.

O K A Y

let’s start with... the basics:

MC Command Center ⭐

UI Cheats Extension ⭐

More Columns in CAS ⭐

No Mosaic ⭐

CAS Background

CAS Blob Remover

CAS Immersive Lighting

CAS Tidy Accessories + Details

New Loading Screens

Cube Map Remover ⭐

Into the Light (Lighting Mod)

Out of the Dark (Lighting Mod)

Twinkle Toes (Lighting Mod)

No Fade on Sims and Objects

Build/Buy Camera (Tab Mode) ⭐

Lot Trait Effects Hider

Smaller Plumbob ⭐

& then you need... realistic socialization:

Chat Pack ⭐

Whim Overhaul ⭐

Meaningful Stories ⭐

Personality Please

Better Elders

More Face to Face Conversation

Call Over Sims (Higher Distance)

Call Anytime + Chat Longer on the Phone

Unlisted Phone Numbers ⭐

Low Fun is Boring

Family Matters (Share Big News with Family Members)

Share More News ⭐

Congratulate More

Ask What Happened More

Conversation Tweaks

Chat Standing Still

No Stand Up to Greet

No Rude Intro Animation

No Flirty Animation

Apology Fix (Don’t Apologize if Your’re the Victim)

Angry Walk-style Only When VERY Angry

Less Intrusive Conversations

NPC’s Get Out of My Convo

Autonomous Parenthood Social Interactions

Autonomous Social Interactions

Reduced Idle Chatting

Know Your Coworkers / Classmates ⭐

More Away Actions

More Social Activities

Spend Weekend With

Teach Me the Rumbaism

now let’s talk about... realistic romance:

Chemistry System ⭐

Pillow Talk After Woohoo ⭐

No Shy First Kiss

No Woohoo Dance

Shower Woohoo Tweaks

No Romance for Family

Restricted Romance Interactions

Less Jealousy

Simda Dating App

Can I Come Over?

Date Night Event

Movie Night Event

Set Family Relationships ⭐

Set Extended Family Relationships ⭐

Bathroom Privacy Tweak

Bridal Shower Event

Bachelor(ette) Party Event

Auto Engagement / Wedding Ring ⭐

Vacation Weddings

Sit at Weddings

Better Wedding Presents ⭐

Honeymoon Event

Buy More Gifts from Phone

Ask for Romantic Massage

Realistic Divorce ⭐

Traumatic Divorce for Children

Improved Relationships

No Restaurant Bill When Invited ⭐

Faster Cooking at Restaurants ⭐

Better Food Quality at Restaurants

Finish Eating in Restaurants

Restaurant Guests Overhaul

Restaurant Sit Tweak

(can y’all tell that restaurants annoy me? lmao)

first comes love, then comes... pregnancy / toddler / kids / fur babies:

Ages Behavior Tweaks

Toddlers Spawn at Parks (with Parents)

More Children at Beaches

Pregnancy Overhaul

Rub Your Baby Bump (Small Pregnancy Overhaul)

Determine Baby’s Gender for All ⭐

Ultrasound Scans ⭐

Baby Shower Event

Amazing Birth (Rave About Your Delivery)

Advanced Birth Certificate ⭐

Sibling Care Tweaks

Make Less / Clean Less Mess

Auto Brush Teeth After Puking

Auto Put Activity Crafts into Inventory

Allow Toddlers to go to Services

No Call Out of High Chair

Toddler Power Nap

Better Toddler Milk

Better + Younger Nanny

Call a Babysitter ⭐

Call a Dog Walker

Shorter Dog Walks

Dog Walkers in Other Worlds

Scold All Pets

Sell Grown Up Pets

Pet Food Serving Overhaul

More Efficient Pet Brushing

Kids Can Walk Dogs

Kids Can Order Espresso

Kids Can Ride Bikes

Kids Have More Phone Interactions

Kids Can Cook

Kids Can Do Retail

Kids Can Garden

Kids Can Make Flower Arrangements

Kids Can Make Robots

Kids Can Workout

Kids Can Do Spa Activities

Kids Can Play Guitars

Kids Can Play Ping Pong

Birthday Anytime

Let Friends Age Up ⭐

No Auto Put Away Toys

No Auto Put Away Pet Toys

No Puddles Under Tubs (Toddler Bath)

Has to Pee Walk-style for Kids Only

Better Homework ⭐

Better Grade School ⭐

Better High School ⭐

Preschool for Toddlers ⭐

School Projects are Fun

More School Holidays

25 School Vacation Days

Prom Night Event ⭐

Sleepover Event

Pizza Party Event

Field Trip Event

Family Reunion Event

Pool Party Event

speaking of school... university:

Less Credits for Degree ⭐

University Costs More ⭐

University Holidays Fixed

Higher Scholarships ⭐

Rejection Letter

Harder Distinguished Degree Acceptance ⭐

Degree Required for Promotions

Faster Run to University Class

Teens Jump to University

Choose Your Helmet

Choose Your Roommates ⭐

Roommate Age-Checks

Roommate Significant Other Fix

Roommates No Random Outfit Changing

Roommates No Random Item Spawning in Dorms

Roommates No Spawning Meals

Roommates No Trash

Roommates Sleep All Night

Roommates Less Music

College Org Members Are Uni Students

Faster University Homework ⭐

Faster Tutoring Class

Copy Graduation Photos and Diploma

No Bad Microwave Buffs

No Ghosts on Campus

Sports Fixes

Game Day Event

Graduation Party Event

once you graduate... careers & aspirations:

Plan Career Outfit

Better Work Actions

Enlist in War ⭐

Live in Business

Faster Retail Actions

Faster Record / Edit Videos on Video Station⭐

Higher Acting Gig Payouts & Royalties ⭐

More Realistic Overmax Pay ⭐

Higher Payments for Paintings ⭐

Higher Royalties for Apps/Games ⭐

Higher Royalties for DJ Mixing ⭐

Higher Royalties for Lifestyle Brands ⭐

Higher Royalties for Song Lyrics ⭐

Higher Royalties for Music ⭐

Freelancer Edits are More Successful

Sketchpad No Fees

Campaign Rally Event

Visible Political Position

Watch Political Speeches at Podium

Retirement Party Event

The University Aspiration Pack ⭐

Accomplished Lady Aspiration

Family Aspiration

Grow Up Aspiration

Teacher’s Pet Aspiration

Knowledge Aspiration

Retirement Aspiration

Romance Aspiration

Famous Pastry Chef Aspiration

Twilight Years Aspiration

All-Rounder Aspiration

Programming Genius Aspiration

Travel and Culture Aspiration

Wellness Aspiration

9 to 5 Career Pack ⭐

Night Shift Career Pack ⭐

Part Time Career Pack ⭐

Fitness Career

Health and Beauty Career

Modeling Career

Journalism Career (Adult + Teen)

Trust Fund Career (Adult + Teen)

Welfare Recipient (Adult + Teen)

Saturday Jobs (Teens)

Oceanography Career (Teens)

Private Tutoring Career (Teens)

All Freelancer Careers (Teens)

Tutor (Odd Job)

Woohoo (Odd Job) - lmao

Art Show Event

hahaha... adulting sucks:

Basemental Alcohol ⭐

Happy Hour Event

SNB Realistic Bills ⭐

SNB Banking

Invest in Stocks

Lowered Thermostat Bills

Instant Thermostat ⭐

Auto Wrinkles for Adults

Life Decider 

House Warming Party (No More Fruitcake)

Door Knock Notification ⭐

Island Events Notifications ⭐

No Strangers Knocking at Your Door

Quick Showers / Baths ⭐

Shower + Bladder Reliever (don’t judge me)

Power Nap ⭐

Sleep All Night

Smarter Robot Vacuum

Functional Tide Pods

Clean Your Bedsheets

Auto Put Away Clothes

Auto Start/Dry Clothes

Laundry on Community Lots Costs

No Idle Laundry Animations / Sparkles

Don’t Prep Food Where You Angry Poop ⭐

Don’t Wash Dishes Where You Angry Poop ⭐

Eco Dishwasher

Faster Cooking ⭐

No Auto Set the Table

Ask to Cook, Bake, Grill

BBQ Event

Custom Food + Recipe’s ⭐

Custom Drinks + Recipe’s ⭐

Grannie’s Old Cookbook + Recipe’s ⭐

Bake Cupcakes in Oven

Coolers are Cooling

Advanced Fishing ⭐

Fishing Trip Event

Fish for Crabs, Lobster, & Shrimp

More Seafood Servings

More Snacks in Fridge

More Food at the Bar

More Food in the Cafe

Flea Market Every Sunday

Get to Church

just in case you... get famous:

No Fame Decay ⭐

Celebrities Never Reject Fans

Celebrities are Quarantined in Del Sol Valley ⭐

Get Famous Award Overhaul

Less Celebrity Reactions

Famous Sims Gain Followers Automatically

More Follower’s Resolution for Everyone

Free Staff (Chef, Barista, Bartender, etc.) ⭐

Gardeners and Maids on Weekends

Red Carpet Event

whatever you are... just be happy and healthy:

Fitness Controls ⭐

Balanced Calories ⭐

Go for a Walk

Hiking Increases Herbalism Skill

Power Workouts

Athletic Outfit in Winter ⭐

Healthy Drinks

Improved Meditation Stool

Improved Spa Day Tablet

Improved Yoga Mat ⭐

Craftable Pottery

Less Elder Exhaustion

Less Sickness

Longer Basketball Games

More Fun Stuff

Online Gaming with Headsets

and I can’t forget these... more gameplay mods:

NPC Controller ⭐

Improved Autonomy

Simulation Lag Fix

Simulation Timeline Unclogger

Improved Autonomy During Loading Screens ⭐

No Empty Venues When Arriving ⭐

No Temperature Deaths ⭐

No Death from Murphy Bed

No React to Stranger’s Death

Realistic Death (Mortem) ⭐

Memorial Event

Freezing Sims Don’t Turn Blue ⭐

More Club / Holiday Icons

Make Hidden Holiday Traditions Selectable

Random Holiday Traditions

Wellness Traditions

More Holiday Icons

Less Rain More Sun

Less Snow More Sun

Summer Blow-Out Event

Christmas Eve Event

New Year’s Eve Bash Event

No Ugly Rain Outfits

More Umbrella Variations in World

Open Umbrella on Rainy Days Only

No More Broken Umbrellas

Destroy Leaf Piles ⭐

Dress Code Lot Trait

Gender and More Lot Trait

Preferences Lot Trait

Add Sims to Groups During Events

No Auto Club Gathering ⭐

Flower Arrangements Slower Decay

Take Photo Overhaul (Moschino Stuff) ⭐

Snorkel Everywhere

Don’t Turn NPC’s into Spellcasters

No Role Outfits for Sages

ROM Portal Only for Spellcasters

& you also need these... much-needed overrides:

More Sponge Colors

More Sippy Cup Colors

More Dog Leash Colors

White Ice Skates

Better Food Textures (All of Them) ⭐

Hidden Bassinet ⭐

iPhone X Phone Replacement

Playing Cards Replacement

Military Salute Overhaul

Small Saucer Light ⭐

Working Medicine Cabinet ⭐

Working Alarm Clocks ⭐

Realistic Fighting Animation 

Oasis Springs + Island Living Palm Trees ⭐

special thank you to all of the wonderful mod creators! seriously, I could not play this game without you guys... (no, really.) There are way too many of you guys to name without missing someone... so if you reblog this, all I ask is that you please tag your favorite modders! (& maybe even add your favorite mods?)

[papirouge]

Women always worked. Feminism didn't invent jobs or labor. For centuries women were nurses, midwives, teachers, herbalists, servants, farmers, seamstresses. Women need financial independence in case they need to leave an abusive family or husband. For a long time, the only option for women to leave an abusive home was to marry a man.

The TikTok post was quite vague about it, but do you realize that in that context "working" means "belonging to the working force" in a SOCIAL perspective, not productive. Hence the whole taxing thing. Not every type of productive work is subjected to taxes. I could make a dress for myself or friends without having to pay taxes.

Yes, women always worked, but not in a office, away from home.

ALL the jobs you quoted are typically jobs women can make from home. You can be a housewife and still work.

I like that passage on Proverbs 31:10-31 about married women that screams #girlboss:

"A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.

She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate."

The whole "financial independence" narrative of people arguing that women belonging to the workforce are better protected than housewives becomes moot the moment you realize the actual purpose of marriage on a religious perspective (as marriage has been initiated by Jews, and later perfected through Christianism). Marriage is a contract. During mariage, husband and wife do share their assets. A boss can fire you overnight without any accountability. A husband CANNOT. In Christianism, you are NOT allowed to divorce your spouse. The only exception being adultery or death. So assuming that every married housewife is jeopardized to be dumped by their husband overnight is ludicrous. I know secular people relationships are a mess but there's no point to project your issues on God fearing couples who won't call it quit at the slightest trial.

It's crazy to me that anti marriage argue that housework is "unpaid labor" when the husband literally provide food and shelter for the entire household. There is reciprocity. And housework itself isnt "unpaid labor" anyway, it's called being a grown adult and taking care of one's house or one's children(!!) like any normal adult/parent does. I don't expect a cookie whenever I'm washing the dishes or doing the laundry... Yall just lazy and entitled LOL

"the only option to escape an abusive home was marriage"

And? Women marrying for the wrong reasons doesn't mean marriage itself is bad.

[blackestnight]

who is the better cook!!!!!

YELLS BECAUSE I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS ABOUT THIS!!!!!

short answer: aymeric.

long answer, because i'm me so of course there's a long answer:

hanami is just as good at cooking in a technical sense. in its most basic form cooking comes down to ability to follow directions combined with ability to use common sense, both of which hanami is actually very good at (when she wants to be). she can take raw ingredients and cook them appropriately to bring them together into a meal that's nutritious, pretty solid in the taste department, and not egregiously burnt, undercooked, or actively harmful to the person who eats it. like, she can do Competent Adult CookingTM. she didn't get a choice in learning. a bitch has allergies!!! to, y'know, some common dietary staples!!! and when she was a kid her moms were happy to make sure she had food that was safe for her, duh, it was their job to take care of her. but she's also one of five kids, not even counting the small army of cousins and aunts and uncles and other extended relations who tend to flock to the hagane family table, and eventually dinner's ready, eat up turned into dinner's ready, here's your plate, hana-chan turned into kitchen's open for you, hana-chan. because feeding that many people is a chore on its own, and once hanami was old enough to cook for herself she was expected to, both because it was a skill she had to learn anyway and because it made it easier for everyone if she was the one in charge of making sure her dinner didn't kill her on accident.

so she can cook. she's not bad at it—i'd go so far as to say she's good at it. but it's not something she enjoys. she does it because she has to, because her food is her responsibility, and...honestly as she got older the concept of mealtimes became associated with isolation, for her. because she couldn't eat what everyone else did, so she slowly stopped eating when everyone else did, to ensure she wouldn't be crowding the kitchen or contaminating her food, and if she did sit down at mealtimes she had either already eaten or was picking at rice and veggies to tide herself over.

so yeah, she can cook, and she's good at it. she doesn't like it. but holy shit does aymeric like cooking.

aymeric didn't have to learn to cook. he probably wasn't expected to learn to cook—minor house or no he's still a child of nobility, and came from a family of means, the sort of family that has a Manor and Staff and people who address them as My Lord Viscount. granted he'd probably be expected to be somewhat self-sufficient as a member of the temple knights, unless ishgard goes with a really traditional squire-knight model but it doesn't seem like it to me, but still. not a skill expected of him.

but he cooks. he likes cooking! it's his lorebook-assigned hobby! one of the greatest joys in his life is sharing food with the people he cares about and getting them to enjoy it too. he has been trying and failing to get lucia and estinien interested in the culinary arts for years.

so when he meets hanami, who mostly views food as a chore and whose dietary needs come with a laundry list of restrictions that cut out at least one staple ingredient of basically every coerthan dish, you can't tell me this man's response wouldn't be "alright, BET." and rolling up his shirtsleeves.

aymeric is the better cook because he's passionate about it, both generally as a hobby and as a means of expressing specific affection for hanami. what better way to show he cares than setting aside what could be several hours to make sure she has a really nice few minutes?