#like i want to see how him being gone affects the server at large | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

jadequeen88 · 4 years ago

Text

Incel Tomura

I couldn’t think of a good title for this, so... I just went with something real blunt. Anyway, this was inspired by a friend and how she actually met her IRL boyfriend.

PAIRING: Incel!Shigaraki x egirl!reader

TW: face sitting, degradation, mommy kink, reader basically bullying Tomura (he deserves it)

3.2k~

AS ALWAYS MY FICS ARE STRICTLY 18+

“TCH!”

Tomura scoffed at the screen of his laptop. The Discord server he helped admin had gone to shit since he let that idiot Dabi loosen the requirements to join. It was one thing when Toga joined. He knew she was a decent gamer. But you? With those stereotypical cat-ear headsets, perfectly done make-up and short skirts? Please… He saw right through you. Just another fake ~uwu~ e-girl trying to pretend they knew what they were talking about.

It didn’t end with you being annoyingly informed in the gaming chat, either. You were always in the anime and manga chats, too… Suggesting different ones that there’s no way you actually enjoyed.

But the WORST part of you being in the server? Spamming the picture chat with selfies and outfit pics. No, it wasn’t against the guidelines and yes, you got lots of compliments (of course, you were clearly hot), but it made Tomura livid. Where there used to be pics of half-built PCs and screenshots of character upgrades, now there were endless pictures meant to tease and bait the guys in the server.

Today’s picture is what sent him completely over the edge. Your hair was put up in two messy space buns, signature pink cat-eared headset perched on your head. Your black, mesh top was straining against your tight, hot pink bra, barely hiding your cleavage and your slender neck was adorned with a chunky, black collar with a large, silver ring hanging from the front. The icing on the cake, though… the thing that broke him, was the face you were making. Eyes crossed, little pink tongue lolling past your perfect hot-pink lips, it was an obvious ahegao face. The caption read:

“New collar! Thank you for da gift @XxXknifey_wifeyXxX”

Followed by a bunch of annoying ass emojis.

Tomura shifted in his gaming chair, his growing bulge making his sweats tight. He gritted his teeth and opened his DMs…

******

You snickered as you opened your text chat with Dabi. Poor Tomura… He had no clue his friend was an old high school buddy of yours and sent screenshots every single time he bitched about your presence on the server. At first, it was just a couple of snide comments, but you quickly decided to turn it into a game. You’d add more emojis than you normally would, flirt shamelessly with Toga in the chat, and be very vocal with your opinions. Then it progressed with more and more selfies, pics showing off your new skirts, and pics of your pink, girly gaming setup. Today you pushed it with the ahegao face, you’ll admit. It was pretty out of character for you, but you couldn’t wait to hear about Tomura’s reaction from Dabi.

It was everything you hoped it would be:

Decay_666_

So can we give those bitches their own chat or what? Seriously, I’m sick of seeing their shit everywhere. Did you see her ahegao face selfie? This server was supposed to be for ACTUAL gamers, not fake e-girl sluts spamming the chat with their bullshit…

Cremation_Daddy

Lol, damn dude, calm down… we can make a separate chat. You’re the only one on the server complaining. Y/N really fucking you up that bad?

Decay_666_

Oh, fuck off… she’s just being an attention whore and it’s getting on my nerves.

Cremation_Daddy

Yeah, whatever you say. Prolly jerkin it to that selfie right now

You didn’t know why, but you kinda had a crush on the skinny loser. Knowing how worked up he’d get over the smallest things you did thrilled you. You wanted to know just how badly you affected him and today was the day you’d find out.

*****

Tomura heard a ping from his monitor alerting him to a new DM. expecting it to be Dabi giving him more shit, he scowled and clicked over to his Discord tab. When he saw that it was you DMing him, it was like someone had poured a bucket of ice water over his head. He could barely type he was so nervous.

Y/N

Hey :)

Decay_666_

Y/N

How did you like my new collar?

Tomura panicked. Had Dabi said something? There’s no way he’d do that. How did he even respond to that? He decided to feign ignorance.

Decay_666_

What collar?

Y/N

*image*

He audibly gasped. You sent him the selfie you’d posted in the chat earlier. Somehow, it was even hotter than the first time he’d seen it. Probably because you had sent it to him. You wanted to make sure he saw it. The thought alone made him painfully hard. He typed out a shaky response:

Decay_666_

Yeah… you look really pretty :)

He grimaced. He couldn’t think of anything clever when he was put on the spot like that. Plus, how long had it been since he’d spoken to a girl one on one? Much less a hot one? Never. That’s when.

Y/N

Aww, you’re so sweet :) wanna see it in person?

Now Tomura was wondering if he’d died and gone to heaven. Did she want to meet up? Wearing that fucking collar? There’s no way… He stared at the screen for a good ten minutes before another ping brought him back to reality.

Y/N

I’m free now if you are. Plus, there’s a new episode of *insert favorite anime* out and I didn’t wanna watch it alone.

Decay_666_

Yeah. Sure.

His response was almost uninterested but inside he was panicking. When was the last time he showered? How much time did he have to get ready? Did he even have any clean clothes? He leaped from his chair and ran to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Another ping rang out and he raced to check his DMs to see that you’d sent your address. To his surprise, you only lived a short walk from him. Another jolt of excitement shot through his spine as he quickly responded.

Decay_666_

Be over in 30 :)

He turned on the shower then started picking through his pile of clothes finding the ones that smelled the least offensive. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been this nervous and excited at the same time.

*****

Tomura shifted from one foot to the other, nervously scratching at the side of his neck. He caught himself before the skin there broke and he ended up having to deal with a bloody neck on top of already being a nervous wreck. He’d only been standing outside your apartment for a minute or two, but it felt like an eternity. He kept checking his phone to distract himself. Just as he was starting to question if this had been a good idea, the door flung open.

His eyes widened and his mouth turned into a thin line. You answered the door in a fucking towel. He began opening and closing his mouth like a fish that had been plucked from the water. You giggled innocently like it was perfectly normal to answer the door nearly naked.

“You’re here a little earlier than I expected! I just got out of the shower. Come on in,” you moved to the side to give him room to walk through the door into your small apartment. You were sure to not move completely out of the way so he’d have to almost brush against your chest. You could feel him stiffen and hold his breath as he passed by.

This was going to be so much fun…

*****

Tomura’s dick had been painfully hard the moment he’d seen you in that towel. Luckily, when you’d gone into your bedroom to get dressed, he was able to position it in his waistband so he wouldn’t be pitching a tent in front of you. The thought of you noticing him popping a boner just by looking at you in a towel was mortifying.

However, what you decided to change into didn’t help his situation. Your baby pink terry cloth shorts would have shown the curve of your ass had it not been for the little row of ruffles around the bottom. Your tank top, the same baby pink color as your shorts, was pulled tight across your chest (holy shit, were you not wearing a bra?!). A fleeting glance at your chest proved to Tomura that you definitely were not wearing a bra.

“You can come on back,” you beckoned from the doorway of your bedroom, “I thought we’d be more comfortable in here…”

He gulped and rubbed his sweaty palms on his jeans before nodding and rising to walk towards you. Your room was foreign to him. Decorated with all shades of pink and purple, soft, plush bedding, and a soft pink glow emanated from the LED strip lights that lined the walls. Tomura stood awkwardly, looking around for a chair to sit in when you flopped onto your bed and began pulling up the streaming app on your tv.

You looked up at him sweetly and patted the spot on the plush comforter next to you. “Come sit, Tomu! You don’t have to stand way over there. I don’t stink, ya know,” the wink you gave him made his knees buckle.

“Umm,” he chuckled nervously, “No, of course not. You, uhh… you smell…”

No, you were way too close. This was bad. There’s no way he would be able to string together a coherent thought, much less hold an actual conversation with you. You pout and lean in even closer to him.

“Tomuuuuu!” fuck, he hated that he loved that stupid nickname, “You think I smell?!”

“What?! N-no, not at all. I was trying to say that-”

Before he could finish his sentence, you tilted your head to the side offering up your neck for him to smell and he swears his eyes crossed as he tried to absorb what was happening.

“I even wore my new perfume! Go on, smell. Tell me what you think,” you smirk looking out of the corner of your eye.

Fuck.

You were teasing him, he knew you were, but his dick was so hard that he was completely at your mercy. He leaned in to take a tentative sniff and his eyes wandered lower. His breath hitched when he noticed the outline of your hardened nipples peeking through the thin material of your tank top. Before he knew what was happening, you turned your face forward and put your mouth next to his ear.

“Are you looking down my shirt, you pervert?” you purred. Tomura made some sort of incoherent noise and pulled away.

You laughed and pushed his shoulder playfully, “Geeze, I’m just kidding! You’re wound so tight.” you pause making a thoughtful face.

“Oh, I know how to help! Come on, over here,” you pulled him between your spread thighs and proceeded to rub his shoulders, working out all of the knots in his lean back.

After a few seconds, Tomura began to relax into your touch, slumping slightly and letting out a tiny sigh. He was deathly still the entire time you massaged him. He was terrified if he moved too much that his raging boner would free itself from his waistband. When your hands left his shoulders, he started to move away just to be pulled back into your lap. His head landed in your cleavage as your hands trailed down his chest.

“Hmm, so tense, Tomu,” you whispered into the crown of his hair, “Is my massage not working?”

He wanted to yell that of course he was tensed up. That his dick is the hardest it’s ever been in his life and if he doesn’t hold as still as possible, he’s scared he might start humping the air like a pathetic dog. Before he can answer, your hand trails down to the waistband of his jeans, and he freezes. The tips of your fingers brush across his leaking tip and Tomura lets out a low, needy moan before he can stop himself.

“Just what I thought,” you purred as you began to trail your fingers up and down the hard bulge in his jeans, “Pathetic. Look at you, so fucking hard for me. And all I did was rub your shoulders.” He wanted to defend himself, but all he could do was whine as his eyes rolled in the back of his head while you continued touching him through his jeans.

“And to think, I never thought you’d want anything to do with some fake bimbo like me. Because I only game and watch anime for attention, right?” you squeeze his cock through his jeans, causing him to yelp. “Well? What do you have to say for yourself, incel? Wanna tell me why your dick is this hard for me if I’m so annoying to you?”

The realization that Dabi had told you everything flitted through the back of his mind, but he didn’t have room in his brain right then to be mad at him. He had to do whatever he needed to do to keep you touching him.

“I, ahh... I’m s-sorry,” he stuttered pathetically. The front of his jeans was wet from your teasing and the denim was rubbing him raw through his thin boxers, “D-didn’t, fuck, didn’t mean it like… ahh, l-like th-that.”

You loved how easily you could wreck him. You pet his hair back from his sweaty brow as you cooed at him lovingly.

“You know,” you removed your hand from the front of his jeans and he whined from the lack of friction, “You really hurt my feelings, baby. I thought you were so cool and the whole time, behind my back, you said just mean things about me.”

He sat up and turned to face you. His pathetic, needy gaze shot straight to your core. The power you held made you drunk and you desperately wanted more.

“No, no no no…” he grabbed your hands and you realized how clammy they were, “I’m-I’m so sorry. Please! Please…”

“Hmm,” you studied him for a moment, “Well… There might be a way you could make me feel a little better.” you tucked a strand of hair behind his ear, “You were so mean to me.”

“Anything! Please! I-I’ll do anything for you!” desperation started creeping in, thinking you’d leave him hanging with no relief. Little did he know, you had no intention of letting him go any time soon. Your plush lips curled into a devious smile. A soft hand reached up cupping his jaw.

“What a good boy, Tomu,” a tremor passed through his body. You reached over to your nightstand and pulled out the collar you’d taken the selfie in.

“You know,” the collar danced between your painted nails, “This also came with a leash. I was thinking,” your lust-filled eyes meet his, “If you wanted to be a good boy for me… You’d let me see how pretty it looks around your neck.”

Tomura hesitated, his eyes rapidly moving between your eyes and the collar you held. After a moment of consideration, he nodded. You giggled and clapped your hands together excitedly leaping off the bed. You returned with a short, chain-link leash.

“Now,” you leaned in and fastened the collar around his neck. Your bodies were centimeters apart and Tomura thought he might pass out, “When you’re wearing your collar, you don’t call me Y/N,” you nudge his ear with your nose and whisper, “You call me ‘Mommy.’ Do you understand?” you feel him nod against your face.

“That’s not how good boys answer their Mommy. When you answer me, you say, ‘Yes Mommy’ or ‘No Mommy.’ Is that clear?”

“Y-yes… Mommy.”

“Mmm, what a good boy,” you placed a soft kiss on his neck and he let out the most delicious whimper. You hooked a finger through the ring on the front of the collar, “You’re gonna go sit in Mommy’s gaming chair and let her use you as a toy. Okay?”

Tomura’s head was spinning and he almost couldn’t answer until you jerked him by his collar, “Y-yes, Mommy. Please, please make me your toy.”

You stood and dragged him over to your chair and made him sit, “What a polite boy you are! Saying ‘please’ without being asked. If you keep that up, you just might get a reward,” his belt buckle rattled as you worked his jeans down his narrow hips.

A ragged breath escaped his chapped lips as you removed your tiny shorts revealing a black, lace thong. You straddled his lap, your dripping slit hovering a centimeter over the angry, leaking head of his cock. His hands shook as you placed them on your hips and slowly moved your thong to the side. Descending an inch at a time, only teasing his tip, was causing him to come undone underneath you.

“You’re already so close and I’ve only put the tip in. You better be a good boy and not come until I tell you to or you’re going to be punished,” you pushed another couple of inches inside and he nearly wept.

“I-I’m trying, M-mommy! I wanna be a good boy!”

“Mmm, I know, baby. You’re doing so,” another inch, “So…” and another, “Well.” you were fully seated on his cock now. Tomura knew he wouldn’t last. Your velvet walls were sucking him down harder than anything ever had before. It made his fleshlight feel like it was made of sandpaper. You had ruined him for anything else.

With a few rolls of your hips and some high, airy moans, he was about to bust. “Mommy! Mommy, please! I-I’m g-gonna…”

“Tomu,” your voice was authoritative now, “If you come in Mommy’s pussy, I’m going to make you clean it out with your tongue then I’m going to sit on your face until I come as many times as I want.” your hand wrapped around his throat and you started bouncing on his cock. Your filthy words and aggressive motions catapulted him into an orgasm.

“You bad, BAD boy,” a smack to his cheek broke off his moans, “You disobeyed me! Did you do that on purpose?” your hand around his neck flexes, “Are you just a dirty incel that wants Mommy to get mean with you? Answer, Tomu!”

“Yes, Mommy!”

“Tell Mommy what you are…”

“I-I’m a-a… dirty incel.”

“And what do you want?”

“W-want… want Mommy to b-be mean to me…”

You lift him by the collar and attach the leash. He’s thrown onto the bed and you waste no time hovering your dripping slit over his face.

“Now,” you jerk the leash, “Clean up your mess.”

Tomura knew he should be disgusted right now, but his dick was getting harder by the second. With each lick inside your sloppy hole, he shamelessly moaned against your skin. The vibrations were going straight to your clit, causing you to ride his face harder. This went on until you’d almost reached your peak.

“Oh, baby,” you’re making Mommy feel so, so good, “I-I’m gonna…”

Tomura grabbed your ass and moved you back and forth on his face as he sucked your clit into his mouth. Your orgasm hit hard and fast. You lifted your body giving him a moment to breathe before sitting back down, earning a startled mumble from him.

“Don’t think that’s all,” you laughed and humped his face, making his eyes roll into the back of his head, “Be a good boy and mommy might even let you come…”

Tomura only nodded as he began to eat you again like he was starved. Maybe all the stuff you posted in the Discord server wasn’t so annoying anymore...

#Shigaraki #tomura shigaraki #shigaraki tomura #shigaraki x reader #shigaraki tomura x reader #shigaraki x you #bnha smut #tw // mommy kink #tw degradation #tw face sitting #jade writes smut

2K notes · View notes

quietmyfearswith · 4 years ago

Text

needy little ; preferences

warnings — DDLG, swearing, mentions of longing/missing someone, mentions of leaving someone, teasing??

characters — dark!andy barber, dark!steve rogers, dark!ransom drysdale, dark!bucky barnes, dark!lance tucker, dark!clark kent, dark!syverson, dark!august walker

a/n — THIS IS FIC WITH DDLG DYNAMICS,, do not interact if youre not 18+,, finally??? a new fic???? oh my god im sorry, i may be a bit rusty..

tagging — @la-cey @doozywoozy @melancholyy-hill @pedropcl @beck07990 @isysen @anna-bailey @briefnerdwobblerpainter

masterlist | join my taglist! (please follow my rules)

After placing two scoops of the chocolate ice cream on the cone, Y/N lifted her head up to look at her daddy who sported a scowl on his face as he was drumming a pen in between his fingers as he tried to piece together the facts of the case. Normally, she wouldn’t be allowed so close to Andy as he was working, but given how needy she had been all morning — despite sitting right by his feet wasn’t enough for her — she promised to remain well-behaved and quiet for him so he gave her the green light to go ahead and stay with hi as she played with her scoop and learn toy set. Silently putting down her cone by the ice cream trolley, she moved towards his leg and when he didn’t move or acknowledge her, she clung her arms around his calf as her cheek snuggled up against his shin. “What?” Feeling something cling around his lower leg snapped him right out of his focused trance as his confusion easily melted into adoration as he peered down and saw his girlfriend curled up against him. “My petal’s quite needy today isn’t she?” “Sorry dada,” She said lowly as her fingers drummed rhythmically against his clothed leg, “Was behaved and nice.” Nodding, he then bent and carried her to sit on his lap. She squealed excitedly as she then wrapped her arms around his neck and nuzzled her face in his neck, “Wuv you, dada.” Humming, he rubbed her back soothingly as he looked into her eyes, “Need to hold dada huh?” The smile that formed on her lips was a toothy grin that was the attorney’s favorite sight in the whole world. “Want to hold you so much, dada; ‘m sorry,” She pouted at the thought of him being disappointed at her; sensing the drop of her mood, he then cooed and peppered kisses all over her face, feeling his prickly beard graze her skin prompted her to erupt in a fits of giggles as she loved the affection that he was showering her with. “This what you needed, my little petal?” He asked her in his gentle, playful tone as she nodded and snuggled herself against his chest as she toyed with his large fingers, “Mhm, love you so much, dada.”

“Hello?” August answered the phone call with a frown — Y/N was never one to call her boyfriend when he had missions that required him to go undercover and/or while he had overseas operations; so it was alarming that she called him he thought of only the worst possible scenarios. “Hi, daddy,” She sniffled out into the phone — part of her was relieved she got to hear his voice, but really she just longed to be with him. “What’s wrong, little one?” He furrowed his eyebrows as he impatiently tapped his fingers against the steering wheel; she let out a sigh before admitting, “Miss you, daddy. So sad without you.” Despite feeling pain on the field of his job, the sound of her small and vulnerable voice was the most painful thing he ever had to hear or endure. “Little one, have you been good for me?” She nodded against her phone as she hugged the Cinnamoroll stuffie that had a shirt specifically sewn on for the stuffie which had the words “daddy’s little one” embroidered on it, “I do, daddy. Miss your kisses and hugs so much.” As he parked his car in front of their yard he smirked as he answered her, “Well who knows when I’ll get back right?” He was positive that there was a pout on her lips as she thought of the likelihood that she was going to be alone for a while, “But daddy I miss you already!” Her whine was so loud that she didn't hear the way August opened up their front door and walked to the living room where she was lying in the couch; he ended the call and he could see her slumping down her shoulders from behind before jumping down beside her and hugging her, “Well good thing daddy’s home now, yeah?” She let out a shrilling shriek in excitement as she kissed his bearded cheeks repeatedly, “I missed you so much, daddy! Promise I was the goodest girl for you!”

“How are your chicken tenders, sweetie?” Bucky asked after pressing a kiss on her forehead; they were out to dinner with Sam and his girlfriend, Leila — who like her was a little too. After the two bonded over the activity paper the server handed to them, they both munched down on their meal. “So yummy, tătic! But,” She trailed off as she looked around nervously. After drinking down a chunk of his beer then looked at him with worry written on his face, “What’s wrong, sweetheart?” Without a word, she snuggled close to his side right as she tangled her arms around his metal arm before looking up at him with doting eyes, “All better, tătic!” Slightly picking up on what she was up to, he grabbed another chicken and tapped it on her lips; she moaned lowly when he fed her then snuggled up more to his arm. “Need my touch, don’t you sweetheart?” Shyly, she nodded as she played with his fingers, “Always want you close to me.” Sam and Leila were both busy being all snuggled up too so Bucky repeatedly, sweetly kissed her lips before telling her, “How ‘bout we take a bath later, sweetie?” Extremely thrilled with the idea of spending tub time with her daddy, she nodded too much that little chunks of the chicken she was eating escaped her mouth as she expressed her liking of his idea, “So excited for that, tătic! Can we go home now and bathe together?” Chuckling at the small mess she made, he wiped the sides of her mouth with a napkin then kissed her forehead, “Only a few more minutes before we can bath together, sweetie.”

“Into the tub you go, doll,” Steve sing-songed as he gently placed Y/N into the bathtub that was filled with warm water and soapy bubbles. She giggled as she felt the warm water graze her skin. For a while, she was busying herself with playing and blowing the bubbles; after a while, she was craning her neck to look for Steve, “Sir? Where are you?” A pout was now formed onto her lips that earlier was stretched out into a smile. The super soldier was in their shared bedroom preparing what she was going to wear after her bath when he heard her distressed call for him. Entering their ensuite bathroom the skin of his forehead wrinkled up as he approached her and kneeled down by the tub, “What’s wrong, doll?” A small amount of water splashed onto him when she crossed her arms, “Want you, sir.” Not fully understanding what she meant, he brought a hand to caress her back — as if to coax her into explaining as he said, “I am here, doll. What do you want?” “Want you here, sir,” Unclasping her arms from where they were crossed, she dropped her arms in the bubbly water and pouted at him. Nodding in understanding, he then stood up; hearing her whimper in need made him chuckle a bit, “I’m just gonna remove my clothes then join you in there okay, doll?” Gone was the frown that earlier donned her face for she now had a wide grin as she clapped when Steve slowly dipped in the tub, careful as to not spill water out of the tub. Once he was fully seated in the tub, his doll then moved over to him and hugged him tight, “Love you, sir.” Placing her on his lap, he then kissed the top of her head as he tried to calm his beating heart, “I love you too, doll. Now, how ‘bout we clean you up with your favorite shampoo hm?”

“Where you bringing me, baby girl?” Sy wondered out loud as he allowed his nearly 200 pound self to be whisked away. It was unusual of her to remain this quiet; for some her whining and blabbering would be annoying, but the Texan captain loved how verbal she was especially since it served as a constant reminder about how much he was needed by her. Upon being brought to the den of their house that served as the office, he furrowed his eyebrows in confusion as he gently stroked her back, hoping to coax out an answer out of her, “What are we gonna in the office, baby?” She pointed to the landline phone and to the stuffed animal that arrived defective a few days ago. “You want me to make a call?” He asked and she nodded with a wide smile. “Why can’t you make the call?” The question was asked out of curiosity, but with the way she batted her eyelashes and bit her lip bashfully had him worried. A small smile graced his face when she opened her mouth, but she quickly closed it and instead grabbed a pen and paper. Sitting down on the swivel chair, he patiently waited for her to finish jotting down her message. When she was done, she shyly slid over the paper to him and once he read it the words broke his heart, “My voice is ugly. Who said this, baby girl?” Shrugging her shoulders she fiddled with her fingers but he placed her on his lap which allowed him to gently stroke her thighs, “Come on, baby girl, please talk to me? I miss hearing your pretty voice.” As if to prove his point, his beard tickled her skin as he pressed kisses on her throat; she giggled as her hands pushed his wide chest away and cleared her throat, “Some guy said my voice is too deep for a girl.” Sy’s jaw clenched in anger at the person who disrespected his girl’s feature; a thick finger of his hooked under her chin to make her look at him, “Listen to me, okay? Don’t listen to the meanie who said that. Your voice is beautiful and lovely, just like the rest of you.” Biting the inside of her mouth, she then looked up at him with teary eyes; he was about to question as to why she was tearing up when she wrapped her arms tight around his neck as she peppered kisses on his bearded cheek, “Thank you, daddy. Needed that reminder.”

“Papa?” Y/N groggily called out as she rubbed the sleep away from her eyes and looked to the side of the bed; she frowned when she noticed that the gold medalist wasn’t occupying the earlier spot he claimed. Grabbing for the first stuffed toy he had given her in her arms, she made her way off their bed and checked their walk-in-closet and ensuite bathroom — and was displeased when he wasn’t there. There were two other bedrooms and a bathroom on the upper floor and all three areas did not house her loving boyfriend. “Where are you?” She was now close to crying as she headed down the stairs. Upon hearing noise coming from their dining room, she then skipped over there and was shocked to see him wearing his USA jacket and was faced in front of a laptop. “Well I have to say that my biggest motivation has to be my loving girlfriend,” Just as he said the last word he shot Y/N a sincere smile, patting her lap — motioning for her to sit on it. Thankful that she wasn’t wearing her little pajamas and instead fell asleep wearing one of his sweatshirts, she shyly sat on his lap and was surprised to see that the accomplished gymnast was being interviewed, “And she just pushes me to be the best I can be, in all aspects.” At the compliment, she shyly waved at the interviewer. “Well that is all the time we have. Thank you so much Lance Tucker for gracing us with your presence and introducing us to your lovely girl too.” Lance’s computer screen faded into his screensaver of the two of them — the gymnast kissing her cheek as she smiled wide into the camera. “Woke up without you and was so scared, papa.” Her confession had his heart hurting a bit but he cuddled her and explained, “I’m sorry, angel. I had an interview and you looked so adorable while you sleep that I didn’t want to wake you.” At his explanation, her little mind was able to understand it and nodded, “Promise to never leave me?” His reply was instant, “My greatest nightmare would be leaving you. I love you so much, angel,” For the only thing he has ever been sure of in his entire life was that she was going to be with her for the rest of their days together.

As much as Ransom and Y/N enjoyed summer, the bright sunny days allowed them to stroll around the different sights and go on long road trips across the state — even the country if the only Thrombey child wasn’t feeling lazy. “Princess, have you packed your clothes already?” He asked from the main floor of his house as he zipped up his duffle bag after checking once again that he had packed the necessary garments for their three-day stay in the high-end resort Ransom got them a booking to. “King, can you come here please?” The man that was called for had to chuckle as he made his way up the stairs, heading for their bedroom because he could practically sense that she was pouting as she called for him. “Princess, everything alright with you?” Seeing her kneeling down in front of her suitcase with a wide array of clothing articles spread all around her. Shaking her head, she crossed her arms as her lips formed a pout, “Need king to help me pack.” Wrapping his arms around her and placing her on his lap, he kissed the side of her neck, “My little princess needs help packing her clothes?” Snuggling against his chest, she nodded as she slipped her thumb into her mouth, “King packs my clothes better.” Having her in his lap as he was folding some of her clothes then placing it on her matching suitcases didn’t pose as a challenge for him; in fact he loved the thought of her being all small that she needed him. “Such a helpless, needy little thing you are hm?” Even though he was partially joking, she took it seriously but was not offended by it, “Just want my king near me at all times, please.” After zipping up her bags once they have been filled with all the clothes she was probably going to use during their stay there, he simply kissed her cheek and gently pat her thighs, “Well king’s not going anywhere without his pretty princess. Now let’s go on our vacation, okay?”

“Where are you, bubba?” Y/N pouted as she rubbed her hands on her arms as she stood by the balcony in their apartment. Her phone was in one of the pockets of the bathrobe she was wearing, and when she grabbed for it, she searched on Twitter for Superman. A sad smile graced her lips when she read about him being currently in a different country, aiding citizens who were currently suffering a forest fire in their location. Locking her phone, she then moved towards the door and before fully going in and locking the door behind her she looked up in the sky with hopeful eyes, “Please come home soon, bubba.”

Removing the robe from her body, she rested it by her dresser then crawled under the covers as she hugged the pillow Clark often laid down on when they slept together. A gush of strong wind blew past her and before she could even process what it was or see it properly, she was faced with a freshly showered Clark who was smiling and laying down beside her, “Hi, bubba. I’m home.” Her cheeks hurt from smiling so wide as she kissed his lips repeatedly and excitedly. “I’m so happy you’re home, bubba! I missed you so damn much.” She moaned out in pleasure when his arms opened wide and cuddled her close and warm into his chest. Pressing a kiss on the top of her head, he then rubbed her back soothingly, “I know, bubba. I heard you.” hearing those words, she hid her face deeper into his chest, not having the guts to look up at him. With a cheeky grin, he reassured her, “ And don’t worry, I’ll be all yours this weekend. There’s no way I will be neglecting my precious bubba.”

855 notes · View notes

artdev · 3 years ago

Text

I’m probably gonna get attacked for this lol

Tommy Character Analysis

From a sane yet angry child

The character of Tommyinnit is one of the worst characters on the entirety of the Dream SMP. Yes, the other characters have their flaws, and they have all done some very horrible things, but Tommy has continuously made bad decisions. These decisions have done nothing good for himself and have caused suffering for the other members of the SMP. In this essay I will provide reason to the fact character Tommy fucking sucks and every other character, yes including Dream, are so much better and have redeeming qualities to their characters. I will give a disclaimer: this is about THE CHARACTERS not the CONTENT CREATORS

Tommy’s First Days on the SMP

Tommy’s first day on the SMP was the last day of peace that server would ever see. From the get-go Tommy did nothing but cause nothing but problems for the original people on the server (Dream, George, Sapnap, Bad, Sam, Ponk, Callahan, and Alyssa) which resulted in a ban from not only from Dream, after refusing to obey under his exile he was put in, himself but also from George. The bans were lifted but everything spiraled from that point on. Tommy was the spark that started the disc war. This was a war that spanned over a series of months because Tommy would not stop killing Dream, so in return Dream confiscated tommy’s discs as a punishment, it was Dreams server, so he was not going to let Tommy go around causing problems without consequence.

Quick history

L ’Manburg

L’ Manburg started out as nothing but a drug caravan, started by Wilbur and tommy, would grow into a large country separated by large black walls keeping everyone out and let only a select few in. After a war Tommy did the only selfless thing, he would ever do in his whole time on the SMP. He gave up one of his discs for L’Manburg’s independence, after losing a dule with Dream. In all this tommy keeps up his thieving and antagonizing ways.

The election

The election was Wilbur’s attempt to regain power and respect within his country, there were multiple parties, POG 2020 (Wilbur and Tommy), SWAG 2020 (Quackity), Schlatt 2020 (JSchlatt). POG 2020 was the overall winner but was beat out by 1% by Schlatt and Quackity who had formed a coalition. With Schlatt as the president and Quackity as the Vise President the country is changed to Manburg, the walls are torn down, and Tommy and Wilbur have their citizenship is revoked and are banned from Manburg.

Pogtopia and Manburg v Pogtopia

Pogtopia was the ravine that served as a base for Tommy and Wilbur after the election. This is when techno (my fuckin beloved) had joined and sided with Tommy and Wilbur with the promise of chaos and war. With techno on their side, they start to build up and prepare for war. The war between Pogtopia (with the old residents of Manburg) and Manburg (pretty much everyone else on the server). The war ended with Schlatt having a heart attack in the remains of the destroyed drug van, Tubbo becoming president of Manburg, followed by Wilbur blowing up the country, with assistance from techno, and his grand death at the hands of his father.

Exile

Tommy was sent into his third exile by Tubbo after Tommy once again was causing problems for Tubbo and the new L ’Manburg. Tommy was sent thousand and thousands of blocks away from the greater SMP and he was not allowed to return unless he wanted to die. After spending months in exile with Dream coming by every day and taking Tommy’s things, and tommy almost taking his last canon life, tommy had escaped exile and went to the closest place he could go. Tommy set up a base under Technoblades retirement home and was soon discovered by Techno. Despite Tommy stealing Techno’s items and just being a annoying ass bitch, Techno let Tommy stay. With the help of techno tommy was able to sneak in and out of L’ Manburg.

Final L’ Manburg War

After a confrontation in the remains of a now destroyed community house, Tommy had sided with Tommy, another declaration of war, with Dream and techno going to blow up L’ Manburg. Tommy planed with the other members to gather resources to face off the most powerful people on the server. In the end L’ Manburg lost and was destroyed with nothing left but a sizable crater in its place.

The end of the disc war and drams imprisonment

The end of season two of the SMP was the end of the disc war, after tommy and Tubbo meet up with Dream at the top of a large mountain, where the three fought to get the discs. Dream eventually leads the two brits to a bunker where Dream had been collecting the attachments on the server, like Tommy’s cow henry, Ghostbur’s sheep Friend, and open slots for other pets and Skeppy. While Dream was going to kill Tubbo he was stopped when the entirety of the SMP, lead by Punz, came through the nether portal that led into Dream’s base. They surrounded Dream and caused him to surrender, and landed him in pandoras vault, a large prison built by Sam under Dreams request. Whist Dream has been in prison Tommy has visited a few times and has done nothing but was nothing but an annoying child to an already suffering man. During what was supposed to be Tommy’s last visit he ended up being locked in the cell with Dream due to a potential security breach in the prison, meaning tommy was stuck with Dream for what was only supposed to be a week. Tommy was stuck with Dream for more than a week, like was stated in the terms and conditions of the prison, this extended time alone with Dream was bad for the both of them and it led to tommy losing his last canon life. Tommy was revived by Dream three days later and was freed from the prison shortly after, now out and full of fresh trauma.

Present events

After being revived and released back into the world tommy swore that he would kill Dream. As of tommy’s most recent lore stream there was an attempt. Tommy armed with invisibility and fire res pots, under the cover of Ghostbur paying Dream a visit, snuck into the prison to kill Dream. When tommy finally go to Dream’s cell, he got to trigger happy and took out the axe to soon which ended in tommy being caught by Sam and left Ghostbur stranded with Dream on the other side of the lava. Now that Dream had Ghostbur he would be able to bring Wilbur back and that exactly was happened, Wilbur is now back and as crazed as ever with 13 and a half years of isolation on top of that.

Tommy and His Trauma

I will not ignore Tommy’s trauma, nor will I downplay what he’s been through, cause truly been through a lot. That being said his trauma should not be used as an excuse to blow off what he’s done, if one is going to do that you better danm well not go around and ignore others trauma. Tommy has been through some horrible things, his exile, Dream’s manipulation, being beat to death in prison then being revived, losing not only a brother figure but also a place he called home, as well as the manipulation from Wilbur, these things can really do some damage to a kid or an adult. Tommy though uses his trauma to excuse any wrong thing he does. There are characters on the SMP with similar trauma, Jack Manifold was the first character to come lose all his canon lives but he came back out of spite, both Tommy and Jack went through something similar. Jack, however, doesn’t use this trauma to make excuses for being a massive prick. Jack uses what he’s been through as motivation, while it’s one of his motivations to do something bad, but he doesn’t use it as a hindrance. Now let’s look at someone has experienced the same things as Tommy, Tubbo, Tubbo went through almost everything Tommy went through plus more. Tubbo was manipulated by Dream, saw his country get blown up TWICE, hell he had to mourn the death of his best friend on TWO SEPREATE OCCASIONS, he was killed by someone he thought he could be trusted, was manipulated as well as verbally abused by Schlatt when working in his cabinet. Tubbo has gone on to build his own little town, start a family, he had run a country pretty danm well and created NUKES. Tubbo doesn’t let what happened to him hold him back from doing great things or keep him stuck in his old ways, Tubbo was able to break from what he originally was, a side kick, and has done wonders.

Tommy and His Relationships

Keep in mind this is not about whether Tommy cares about people it’s about how he acts and how that affects others. Tommy cares people so I cannot shame him for that, but despite that he still causes problems for said people.

Tommy and Dream

Tommy and Dream have never gotten along, anyone with fuckin eyes can see that from a mile away, they are always at each other’s throats and always butting heads. Dream is normally pretty levelheaded, until Tommy comes around. When Tommy was trapped in the cell with dream that was bad from the start, but the extended time was even worse. Tommy has always been an aggressor towards Dream, during the war for L ’Manburg when Dream was meeting with Wilbur, Tommy lashed out at Dream and put the independence of this new nation on the line to try and fight Dream. Now on to more recent examples, Tommy’s death. When Tommy was trapped with Dream in the cell Dream was pretty stand offish, if anything he was excited at first, being stuck in a cell with no one to talk to is pretty fuckin lonely. That excitement was sure to be short lived. Tommy is quick to start antagonizing Dream, hitting him, hurling insults at him, and just being all around unpleasant, Tommy would also take things like Dream’s clock and books and throw them into the lava just to upset him. Tommy also killed the one thing in prison that Dream had, a cat that he named hope, another thing Tommy took away just to show “what happens to things you care about”. All these things would build up over time which lead to Dreams burst of anger and caused Tommy’s death.

Tommy and Technoblade

Time to get absolutely PISSED. Techno was never a person to Tommy, he was just the Blade, a weapon to be used till he was not needed. Ever since Techno first logged on Tommy though he had scary dog privileges, getting mad at techno for when he went and assisted Wilbur in the destruction of L ’Manburg when techno had made it clear he was not a fan of government. After Tommy had fled from his exile he went to hide under Techno’s home without Techno’s knowledge, before he was discovered by Techno, he would steal from him and use them in useless ways, such as decorating his hidey hole with gold blocks or how he stole Techno’s gapples and ate them when he didn’t need to, practically wasting them. Once he was found by Techno, Techno let Tommy live with him despite being a leach, he let tommy eat the gapples, and even assisted in getting tommy in and out of L ’Manburg, he even hid Tommy from dream and lied to one of the most powerful people on the server to keep tommy safe. Techno was very patient with Tommy and what does Tommy do? He goes around and goes back to Tubbo, the man who exiled him in the first place, actively backstabbing Techno, and when him and Dream team up and destroy L ’Manburg for the second time he has THE GULL to get mad and shame Techno for it, it’s fucking awful.

Tommy and Tubbo

Tommy and Tubbo are great friends, I can’t lie about that, but he still manages to make shitty decisions that affect him. When Tubbo was president of the New L ’Manburg Tommy started causing trouble, all starting when he (and Ranboo) burned down George’s house, forcing Tubbo to put his vice president under a probation. Even after being put under the probation, he still caused problems. Tommy made Tubbo choose between the safety and freedom for his country or his best friend staying, in the end it was tommy’s fault for being casted into exile, he just wouldn’t behave and follow the rules. He also constantly pushed Tubbo’s trauma to the side to put a spotlight on his own, making him the center of attention, ignoring someone who’s supposed to be his best friend. Now, I will say, he did do something good for Tubbo, during the final disc confrontation he gave Dream the disc’s they were fighting so hard for in return for Tubbo’s safety, I have to give credit when credit is due.

To The C!Tommy Apologists

I know people are going to come after me for this, to any Tommy apologists reading this, please just can it /nm. In canon tommy is about 20 something? You can’t keep using “Oh HeS a ChILd!’ CC!Tommy is a child. Yes, I understand he’s traumatized, so is every other character on the SMP, he isn’t special. Also, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LEAVE US DREAM APOLOGISTS ALONE. All your arguments are so similar and you all thing dream, who is obviously mentally ill, deserves the everyday beating which is incredibly fucked up. Now I know not ALL Tommy apologists are like this but it is a lot of them, regardless of what dream did, he does not deserve to be rarely fed and he does not deserve the constant torture. Also please stop wit the whole ‘dream is obsessed with tommy’ shit, I can’t remember the tag for it at the time of writing this, but it is the creepiest thing I’ve seen and everyone portrays dream to be some yandere stalker and its just not poggers to be honest, and it comes off as very predatory which is ALSO not poggers. To any tommy apologists friends I know IRL this is not directed at you and just know I love y’all.

#dsmp fandom #c!tommy #c!tommy negative #dream smp #dream apologist

91 notes · View notes

embermc · 4 years ago

Text

c!Quackity's form of manipulation is interesting because, although he is definitely lying and purposefully being deceitful, and although he is very much being extremely manipulative by preying on people's insecurities and using what cuts the most deep to them in order to get them to do what he wants, there's also this sense that you get that, at least on some level, c!Quackity genuinely believes the general themes and meanings of what he is saying and trying to convince others of to be true.

I think it ultimately stems from the idea that a lot of c!Quackity's manipulation and convincing attempts he's made in the past few streams are absolutely loaded with self-projection. He, whether it is subconsciously or not, is not only choosing the members of Las Nevadas due to their skill set, what they can provide for him, or because they're currently in a lost, weakened mental state (although those all are a large part of it). In each of the planned additions we've seen so far (Foolish, Purpled, and Fundy), there has been a sense of himself, or an old version of himself, that c!Quackity has noticed in each of them, or at least projected onto them. Each of them represent an old ideal or version of Quackity, something that is very deep-cutting and central to his current philosophies and behavior. And in his attempts to convince them to join Las Nevadas, while he was also being purposefully deceitful, manipulative, and was weaponizing their insecurities, there was also this underlying sense that c!Quackity himself was lashing out, that he was trying to break through to them with what he believes is true due to his past experiences, and in doing so, was forcefully projecting a lot of his own insecurities, both past and present, onto them.

Take c!Foolish, for example. To c!Quackity, yes, he wants to use c!Foolish for his power and weaponize him, but c!Foolish is also representative of a former version of himself. A version that wholeheartedly believed in peace, believed in diplomatic relations in politics and was optimistic about improving the world around him through nonviolence, negotiation, friendships, and love. But now, c!Quackity is adamant about taking power by force, using any means necessary, however unethical and morally dark they may be. He doesn't believe that peace and diplomacy can work anymore, and believes that Foolish is, well, foolish, for thinking they can. c!Quackity believes it is a fruitless venture to pursue the betterment of the world through peace, diplomatic relations, and waiting in hope for something to go right. This is something he wholeheartedly believes now, and is trying to instill that belief in c!Foolish (albeit, through morally corrupt and pretty deceitful ways). c!Quackity looks back on that old, idealistic version of himself and sees wasted potential. He sees plans that never worked, philosophies that were flimsy and bound to fail, and ideas that never paid off. He sees his old self a fool. That is partially why, when faced with this person with such similar ideals and beliefs to his old self, c!Quackity can't do anything but openly experience frustration, and a little bit of disappointment and disgust. (Continuation under cut).

And then there's c!Purpled. In his conversations with c!Purpled, Quackity emphasizes the fact that Purpled has no legacy left. Everything he has is gone, he has nothing for people to remember him for, so he and his contributions don't matter. And c!Quackity then chalks this all up to be the fault of not only Purpled himself, but of the people, the powerful people and figures of authority, that have reduced him to being nothing and have overlooked him, used him. A lot of this speech is definitely c!Quackity being morally dubious in his attempts to recruit Purpled, but there was also this underlying sense of desperation in this scene, of growing emotion and frustration...specifically on Quackity's end. I want to talk about this quote in particular: "You will be a big part of history. Finally, you won't be used by shit people like Dream, or anyone else who has used you for your abilities, and for your skills, and for anything you've ever done on this server." This is a clear sign of projection, as a lot of this quote applies to c!Quackity far more than it applies to c!Purpled (although it can apply to Purpled as well.) Quackity has always felt undermined and used by those above him, whether it be Dream, Schlatt, or anyone else. He's always hated those who he views as tyrants and those who have manipulated or used him to their own benefit. I particularly remember a scene where Quackity, back in the Manberg era, was fuming over the fact that he felt that c!Schlatt was using him, playing him for a fool and using him for his political abilities.

There's also the fact that, due to him constantly being undermined by those above him, nearly every single one of Quackity's plans or ideas have been rejected, or have catastrophically failed. He was left with nothing. This is particularly clear during his pre-Doomsday stream, when Quackity reflects on how so many of his plans have failed, and was left to wonder if anything, and anything he's done for L'manberg, really even matters. Having his plans constantly foiled and being constantly undermined and "used" by those above him with more power, by "shit people," left him hopeless, with a sense of having nothing left he truly had faith in. That is, until Las Nevadas. Not to mention, the idea of being "forgotten" is one that most likely rings true to Quackity, even if he won't admit it to himself, as he's still troubled over being supposedly "forgotten" by his fiances. So, in a way, that's another small example of, although c!Quackity was being purposefully manipulative towards c!Purpled and was weaponizing his insecurities against him, there was still present that deep-rooted idea that, at least on some level, Quackity believes a decent part of what he was saying to Purpled because his arguments were rooted in his beliefs and frustrations with being used and overlooked in the past, although they have become laced and corrupted by his manipulation attempts.

And lastly, there's c!Fundy. This is probably the most blatant example of c!Quackity partially, most likely unknowingly, slipping out of a manipulative mindset for a small while in order to project onto somebody he sees a similar past version of himself in, or reminds him of past qualities and experiences of himself. He brings up again, quite passionately, that idea of being constantly overlooked by people with more power than you, of being oppressed and being told what you can and can't do. Now, of course, he's also being manipulative and deceitful here, because Quackity knows full well that c!Fundy would be enticed by this argument and would be able to relate. He knows that Fundy had a thirst for recondition and a desire not to be oppressed, not to be told what he can and can't do, as well as to have someone give him admiration and affection. He uses this to his advantage, in order to craft a pitch that Fundy couldn't refuse. He even uses people that don't truly have much power, such as c!Tommy, as examples of people that has had power over he and Fundy in the past (although, it's possible that c!Quackity's trust issues have lead him to believe that to be true as well, but that's a different topic and only a theory).

Point being, Quackity is clearly being manipulative here, and he knows it. In all of these situations, there is a good chance that he knows he's not being morally right. He mentions it to c!Sam, making a joke that implies he knows he's not the "good guy."

However.

I do still believe that c!Quackity somewhat believes some of that pitch to Fundy himself, as well. Because he too, has really had similar situations as he describes Fundy having. He was overlooked and pushed around by Schlatt, told what he could and couldn't do. He was told what he could and couldn't do in the early days, when he wanted to join L'manberg. He was even foiled by Techno and Dream, used by Dream in particular, numerous times. He had to have an entire revolution in order to gain the right to declare independence for what was a tiny little hill.

A lot of what makes Quackity's manipulation and lies interesting is that, unlike others like c!Dream, his lies are laced with truth. When he manipulates someone, he doesn't usually just flat-out lie to them, and doesn't always just make stuff up. He takes their insecurities, accentuates them, and then uses them in order to attempt to manipulate the ideologies and motives of the person he's speaking to. And, as I've mentioned before, he projects. This makes it much easier for him to manipulate them, because he can connect to them and develop an understanding of their thought process. But it's also a way for him to subconsciously vent his trauma, his frustrations, and his insecurities.

Quackity is a character that doesn't speak about his emotions often, at least not anymore. To him, "there is no place for emotions in Las Nevadas." He doesn't want to get hurt, so he won't open up. So, in these manipulation attempts, attempts to use others, there's also this subconscious sense of Quackity taking his own frustrations, his own insecurities, and casting them onto somebody else as a way of venting and trying to find a solution to them. He speaks and rants about things that he partially believes are true, about violence over diplomacy, about being tired of being overlooked and used. From there, he can take these frustrations and make action out of them. Find a solution for the troubles and frustrations that now totally belong to the other person as well. This solution being the thing he sees as the solution for his own troubles: Las Nevadas. Because in reality, Las Nevadas isn't really the solution to any of the other people's problems. It's not the solution to Foolish's issues, or Purpled's issues, or Fundy's issues. But Quackity, in his desperation for a sense of his own agency, for a legacy, for an impact he can make on the world, sees it as the solution to his, and he wants that belief to be validated by seeing it as the solution to others' problems as well.

Now, of course Quackity, on some level deep down, knows that Las Nevadas isn't meant to help or heal the people he's recruiting. He does indeed partially want them for what they can offer him, their power, their skills, and so on. He is being manipulative in a lot of his words and actions because he knows he's using underhanded methods in order to recruit people that he can use. But, as I've stated before, Quackity has a tendency to think, at least on some level, that his actions are for the sake of ending oppression on others. He's hypocritical, in a way, and that's always been a part of his character, back since New L'manberg days at least. He's wanted power for himself and is willing to use people to do so, but also strongly believes that he's ending oppression and he's helping out those who are being "used" by tyrants. I think there's a similar situation here, although he's a lot more cynical and views himself as less of a hero now, and acknowledges that he's willing to use unjust methods and use others. He's slightly more self-aware of his misdeeds.

But he's still heavily projecting his own beliefs, insecurities, and ideals a lot, and I just find that interesting. It's a fascinating part of his character's thought process, because as I've stated before, he's aware that he's being manipulative, but his manipulation is still laced with partial truths, truths that he himself believes to an extent. c!Quackity is an incredibly interesting character, and his forms of convincing and manipulation reveal a lot of his inner thought process that he tends to prefer to keep hidden away, for his own sake.

#dream smp #dsmp #quackity #c!quackity #fundy #c!fundy #foolish gamers #c!foolish gamers #purpled #c!purpled #dsmp spoilers #tw manipulation #tw violence #tw swearing #tw cursing #/rp

174 notes · View notes

kim-monsterlings · 4 years ago

Text

Eladan - M Orc x GN Human (Reader) // SFW

The pictures do not belong to me. I only created the mood board. Do not repost my work anywhere.

Content: SFW/Orange; surrounding a mute from birth reader and some mild self-depreciating thoughts of this, mild swearing, minor heartbreak, insecurities, drinking alcohol, light touching (hugging, stroking arms, tusks nuzzled to reader’s cheeks), very fluffy ending to make up for the heartache

Wordcount: 3067

Notes: Eladan was one of the first stories I wrote, but until “tropemas” I never finished him. There is a small follow up planned for Quinn the changeling, with info here, and a maybe NSFW for each Eladan and Vaia the cute minotaur. I hope you love them <3

“Tropemas” Summary: soulmate AU - the first words overheard by your soulmate are marked on your forearm, but they aren’t so nice

Masterlist // “Tropemas” Masterlist

Of all places, the words intended to shatter your heart came while you were working. The words so many others clutched tight and waited for, desperate to find their soulmates, left you wanting nothing more than to avoid them. Suffering with the harsh words marked into your forearm since you were young enough to remember had left you broken-hearted before the offence, and weak-kneed when it finally came.

Working in the tavern, no less. If only you could blame it on the alcohol, but the offending orc had only just begun to drink. Sat in a large booth beside a minotaur - neither of whom you'd ever seen before, but beside Quinn, an old fae friend of yours, a changeling. They'd yet to see you, and after freezing behind the bar, you weren't sure if you had the strength to near them.

The orc's pint had clattered against pierced tusks, the froth bubbling up to a thick, braided beard, before he scowled, almost shouting, "why should I waste my life on some soulmate?" The pint slammed back onto the table once more, emptied. "Fuck fate."

Fuck fate.

It hurt more then. The first sentence you were too familiar with - after years spent scrubbing at the words, hoping one day they would wash away like ink - but the following sentiment twisted your stomach into nausea. The tavern busied in your lapse, patrons flooding in with no concern to your pained smile as you served them.

Fuck fate.

Waste my life.

It wasn't fair.

It wasn't fair for Quinn's soulmate brand to have delicate cursive, to almost whisper "take me", yet yours was harsh and unfeeling. So many times, you had considered marking it over, though artists refused. Altering a soulmate mark was immoral, no matter the price or bargain.

The orc quieted following his outburst. You wouldn't have been drawn closer if not for a call of your name - nickname, at least, with Quinn above all respecting the importance of names - and you were helpless to wandering closer.

Though this was the first night you had ever neared Quinn when out with strangers, the fae only leaned back and softened their dangerous, charming smile. Pierced and pointed tips of their ears appeared through plaited midnight hair as they turned closer. In the presence of strangers, too, they began signing in common, for which you were more than grateful for as the orc's attention swung to you.

"I wanted to say hi. Busy night?" From that, Quinn frowned. "You look tired."

"Tired," you repeated, and shrugged a little, Quinn mirroring with a small sigh. They were busy too, and you had to wonder why of all company, they chose to spend their night with an orc so horribly rude. Of course, you wouldn't outrightly say such a thing - yet. "New friends?"

"Old," they signed, before spelling, "Vaia." They tipped their chin to the almost honey coloured minotaur, and she smiled, her nose ring shifting, which left the orc to be, "Eladan. Only visiting. When do you finish?”

That cracked your mask a little. Quinn would often wait for you, to share a drink in the early morning before walking you home. Tonight, nothing sickened you more than the thought of time wasted in Eladan's company.

So, with your smile weakened, you returned, "tired." Quinn's bright eyes rolled. The excuse was well overused, but they didn't persist. "Have a drink on me."

Their touch brushed to your palm. Quinn kissed your knuckles and bid you goodnight, but only in turning did the angle of Eladan's stare strike you. He hardly feigned looking away from the loose sleeve at your wrist, and had it been any looser, the dark cruelty forever scarring you would have been legible.

The table waited hardly a minute after you left before whispering of you, but to your surprise the mumbled whisper of, "cannot speak," came from the minotaur, not orc. A weight of stares fell upon you where you stood, pretending to wipe down the bar. Vaia's deep voice carried, and though the question came as no surprise, the curiosity only served to benefit your soulmate. "How?"

"Born mute," Quinn said, and that was all.

When you looked back before passing into the kitchen, the orc had gripped his wrist tight.

Another server tended to their booth under your pleading. Most who worked in the tavern, and several customers, had been kind enough to learn some sign, or carry paper for you when needed. The night passed well, without any further heartbreaks, until Quinn's wave caught your eye.

They would be back late in the night for you so you only smiled back, smiling even to Vaia, and paid no mind to the orc yet to leave. But hidden only behind your hair now, his passing scrutiny struck harder. Was it now your shying away that earned a frown, his tusks twisted at his lips, or the refusal to turn away when he came to the bar, leaning on his forearms, that had his head tilting?

Suddenly, the colour of your outfit struck you. Something as simple as that burned in your chest and forced you to lift your head from your chest. The soft green of it matched the orc's mottled shadings near perfectly, and the irony twisted deep in your stomach.

"Pardon me," he said, in a voice so soft you almost forgot the words scarred onto you. "May I ask if your heart is spoken for?"

Why couldn't those be the words of love and affection so many had on their bodies? The pain from his attempt now to - what was he attempting? To seduce you or use you for his visit - bittered what little was left of your good mood. You left Eladan watching as you turned and walked away.

The close friendship you cherished with Quinn became your undoing. Where they went, two shadows trailed, and usually into the tavern. They hadn't specified how long the visit was, nor its purpose, and you couldn't help feeling rude asking after immediately being introduced.

Though you ought to have because Quinn thought it would be fun to introduce you all. Your refusals were ignored after desperately trying to think of an excuse, but your only excuse was work, and they could wait for you to finish. Quinn invited Vaia and Eladan to the markets, a day out usually reserved for only the two of you, and not a heart-breaking orc.

Vaia was quiet, but that was no different to how many were around you. Often afraid to speak for you couldn't, unable to really communicate but with a strained smile and nod, but the company was nice, at least, and when she began talking, drawing you to stalls when a soft fabric caught her eye, you found you didn't mind staying by her side and helping wrap the small scarf carefully by her horns, for more reason than company.

The orc never strayed far. More than often, he stood with Quinn, but his eyes flitted back to you. Vaia moved to catch up with Quinn and left you to yourself before you'd realised, and a quiet rumble of your name left you frozen in shock. He offered a small flower, dark petals and tiny in his hand, though somehow dwarfing yours. Eladan's lips rose as he stepped closer.

"Walk with me?"

Fuck fate, he had cursed, and you wanted to throw the flower, but he ducked his head and left you with an aching heart, as if already resigned to your refusal. The orc looked shrunken; shoulders fallen low as he looked back to where your friends had gone ahead without you.

"They mentioned lunch," he said then, eyes firmly on the flower twirling in your hand. "If you're hungry? Not at the tavern, that would be cruel to take you back when you are not working. Somewhere with warm food."

Cruel, and the word twisted your stomach. In an effort just to make him stop, you nodded, and Eladan's chest deflated on a rush of breath.

"We hunt when we travel. Vaia and I," he said quietly, after stealing looks in what you had hoped to be a companionable silence, walking close enough his arm brushed to yours; the arm marked by his words. "I miss proper meals. Isn't it hard working around warm food all the time? No, I… I suppose not," he mumbled when you only frowned, and his head lifted when, like a blessing, Quinn called out to you.

Eladan offered to order for you. The offer itself tightened your chest in a way you tried to fight off, immediately signing to Quinn and waiting far from the pair and by Vaia. With a nod to the jewellery now changed in her nose, she grinned and thanked you for the implied compliment. Standing beside her now had been easier before, when you didn't see the small frown on the orc's lips after you left him.

The other small tavern in your village was adjoined to an inn, less crowded and more welcoming to friends than a bar would be on a late evening. Eladan squeezed beside you in the booth not intended for so many, and Quinn sat opposite you, leaning into Vaia as you waited for drinks.

With all your heart, you tried to hate the evening. Forced close to your intended soulmate, his muscles thick and tense, it was impossible not to wonder at what could have been - what still might be, if you moved beyond the harsh words you'd grown up with.

He was travelling with Vaia looking for work. They helped people in need of protection as unofficial bodyguards. You believed that wholeheartedly, and even grinned when Vaia told a story of how she'd been the first of their company to beat Eladan in a fight, and the first to bruise his ego. If he'd caught his breath when you'd laughed, you smothered that to the back of your mind.

"If you ever want to travel," he murmured, lifting his pint up and glancing down, a small smile crinkling his eyes. "I'd love to take you. Have you travelled?"

You shook your head and sipped at your drink, which was a dangerous thing to do, now his rumbling voice had begun to sound pleasant, and the press of his thigh to yours was warm and welcomed. You couldn't pinpoint when you had stopped leaning away from him, either, his arm resting on the back of the booth behind you.

"Not many know sign. In the cities, it's... it's different, but the woods and the sea - I think you'd love it."

It wasn't the promise of the sights that made you soften and nod, but the promise of being near him, and you stiffened. By then, Vaia was already nearing the stairs up to the inn, and Eladan brushed his hand to yours in a way of goodnight before retiring, too.

That left you with a changeling who saw too much, who rose from the booth and offered an arm to hold you close. The night carried you both onward in a peaceful silence, until your home began to near. They stroked down your arms only to soften at your wrists, a flash of gold in their eyes disarming you.

"You have always been so vigilant in hiding it. The words," they whispered. "They are not kind, are they? They're… they're what he said. You overhead?"

Unable to sign with Quinn still holding you, only a sniff broke the silence. They waited for you to nod before brushing up your sleeve. Knowing the words did little to prepare for seeing them, for finding them thick and unwavering.

After an evening so pleasant by his side, they slammed a weight into you, knocking a pain which had fallen away over the course of the night, back to its place in your chest.

Why should I waste my life on some soulmate

"His arm is blank. I do not wish to overstep-" you couldn't help frowning, and Quinn laughed with you. "More so than already, but, look," they sighed. Hands gentle on yours, Quinn squeezed. "He thought there wasn't a soul out there for him. Eladan wants you."

You twisted free then, staggering back a step. "He may want a soulmate but he does not want me. He does not want some-" your fingers twisted and Quinn reached, whispering your name as you struggled to focus and sign through the rush of pain. "Some mute. He wants a soulmate, not me. Goodnight."

Quinn ducked their head and returned the sentiment, waiting until you were indoors before leaving. They didn't see you collapsed to your knees and tracing the words by heart, wishing as you had so many times before that things were different.

True to their word and for that you were beyond grateful, Quinn didn't overstep. No more outings as a group were encouraged and you threw yourself into work, spending the nights walking home and chatting with your friend, and only them, waiting until the two guests would finally pass on.

Maybe it was wrong to think so, but you didn't want him. Eladan wanted a soulmate too late. The words were always and would be scarred, stinging, a reminder of how for years you had anticipated it being in disgust at finding you mute. Whether that was so or not, whether it was a mistake, your heart had been burdened for a time long before he had tucked a flower to your ear and teased smiles to your lips, and he would be leaving soon.

Soon, but without any timeframe. It was below you to outrightly ignore him, even on the night he came into the tavern alone. Eladan's warm smile didn't meet his eyes when you left him nursing an almost untouched pint, and for once it was you looking over your shoulder to the lonely orc.

For a breath too long, your stare lingered, entranced by the muscles flexing as he shucked off a jacket, small beads in his beard clinking. The move was one so insignificant - simply removing his leathers, as many would - but he bared his wrists, his plain, empty wrists, like he wanted you to see.

Eladan's shadowed eyes fell from you to his wrist when you were drawn helplessly to the booth. "What I'm thinking," he began quietly, with his thumb rubbing in circles you had drawn time and time before, but where yours were an effort to scrub away words, his were to summon. "I think you already know, don't you?"

Unable to deny it, you did nothing but turn.

Tonight, Quinn wouldn't be there to accompany you home. Maybe it had been a set up - an overstep you doubted, but it didn't surprise you to find an orc the last patron left in the early hours of the closing tavern. Eladan left with his jacket over his shoulder and reached out to brush your hands together before leaving.

You couldn't find the strength to stay standing any longer. The churning in your stomach forced you out for fresh air, collapsing back into the wall for support when the first, long-suppressed sob tore from you.

It wasn't fair.

It wasn't fair to be so heartbroken before ever learning who your soulmate was, and to now want to be with them, to learn them, yet feel the pain of their imprint lingering behind any soft smile or effort in carrying a conversation.

Nor was it fair to be completely unsurprised by the tentative call of your name from your soulmate, the very same who had waited for you, stumbling across you pressing a hand over your mouth and choking back cries.

Eladan's knuckles first brushed from your damp cheeks to skim along your throat. Gentle enough was his hold that you could lean into him and he trembled at the closer embrace, shifting to tuck you against his chest when a shudder wracked you.

"The first words you heard me say," he murmured. "Of all the things that night for you to hear, I think you heard the worst."

The tiny, indistinguishable hum that came from your throat earned a weak smile. Eladan nodded more to himself as he tucked his fingertips beneath your coat and bared your wrist, the words as dark and legible as always.

Why should I waste my life on some soulmate

"Fuck fate," he whispered then, the following words that had served only to worsen the wound. Eladan curled himself closer and nudged his tusks to your cheeks in a move as tender and intimate as you would allow.

For him to twist free from you and turn his head down came with a strike of shame. Had you so easily fooled yourself? To think that this warrior orc, one who spat harsh words and was only passing through, would want you of all people made you weaken and sniff, trying to lean away.

Eladan frowned, braids flicking beyond his shoulder. His fingertips pressed against your cheek to return your unfocused eyes to him, before his hand curled into a fist, arm folded across his chest, and he moved his fist in a slow circle.

"I'm sorry," he signed. The next attempt became so jittery, his movements rigid and nervous all at once, that you reached for his large hands and squeezed. He weakened again and brought your touch to brush against his tusks as he spoke aloud. "Those words were from anger. I thought I was the only soul not to have a match out there. I never thought… you," he breathed, and closed his eyes. Just this once, you told yourself, you would let him lean into you; you ignored that it had happened before, that you'd let him come close already. "I want you. I want to want you for you, for more than fate's hand, and if you would give me the chance - please, I," he caught himself then, his voice cracking. "Quinn is teaching me, um- I-" You couldn't help your smile when Eladan wriggled his fingers free to sign, "please. One chance."

"One," you returned, but it was enough for him to shudder and clutch you tight.

He fumbled behind your back enough for you to recognise hand movements, before he grunted, "thank you."

536 notes · View notes

enderspawn · 4 years ago

Note

op I am pleading for you to talk about c!Schlatt I keep getting interrogated for saying c!Schlatt was the best president and he really didn't do anything super terribly wrong please talk about him

i mean... im sorry anon but idk abt best PRESIDENT. manburg under schlatt.... kind of sucked imo JFKDLSJFKL

1. manburg had massive food shortages, to the point the average citizen (including fundy) had to eat spider eyes to survive.

2. he imposed ludicrious tax of his civillians (namely niki. we dont know if he did that to Every Business like w fundy or if he targeted niki specifically bc of her closeness to the ex-president, but neither is good)

3. exiled those who he saw as political opponents to keep his power

4. straight up ignored his cabinet a lot of the time to make his own decisions (such as destroying the white house, which led to quackity leaving)

5. was widely hated by all the citizens. literally at one point all the ppl left in manburg was schlatt and jack manifold (who was MIA on the server and left to found Manifold Land when he came back)

6. held a public execution, AGAIN without the consent or knowledge of his cabinet (IF I REMEMBER RIGHT. i know big q opposed the execution at minimum, but idk for sure if he knew it was planned at all before the festival)

7. was basically at war his entire presidency thanks to pogtopia's existence

and thats just what i can think of rn! the reasons i like c!schlatt are fully based around him as a character and HIS personal development, not around his policies or actions. especially when compared to the other two presidents, who either won or prevented a war and kept the majority of its citizens happier and healthier than Manburg, he's.... probably the worst president they had tbh

BUT since you gave me an excuse to ramble abt him anyway, i wanna go on abt what i DO like abt him (under a cut bc this post is already kinda long oops) but

tldr; i like schlatt bc of his relationships with others, his flaws and pitiable moments, and how he is a fantastic parallel/foil to the characters around him

I like his complex (and yes, abusive) relationship with quackity, especially after his death and quackity's feelings flipping rapidly between hating him and missing him. but before that they did have a honeymoon-esque period-- at least from quackity's view.

watching their date you get the idea schlatt mightve never really been interested in him and mightve just been using quackity's interest in him for his own advancement! but we dont know.

maybe he did truly love quackity in his own fucked up way in the end, even if he wasnt a good person. maybe he regrets his actions and cruelty. or maybe he doesnt.

in the end they were (like the animatic i linked said) "built from the same dirt", they're both incredibly ambitious and prideful people and parallel each other a LOT (see: q's need for power, his want to execute ranboo paralleling tubbos execution, etc). they're not good for one another, but i love seeing just how they fall apart together (i hope you die, i hope we both die kind of beat)

and.... god his relationship and impact w fundy i could ramble abt all day dude. fundy kept schlatt's sword after his death and calls it an heirloom. we dont know 100% how old fundy was when wilbur was exiled (i mena... he ran for president but current fundy is like 20something and tommy ALSO ran as vp at 16) but we can assume he was a late teen. his own father was gone, but schlatt... seemed to CARE. he showed him affection.

fundy's never truly felt like hes BELONGED anywhere (even the country his father said was all for him, he felt ostracized and made different by his fathers doting babying) and because of that hes always looking for a group to be a part of. hes a people pleaser (its part of why hes so easy for big q to get for las nevadas).

and schlatt GIVES him that feeling of belonging he deserves. hes a spy the entire time, yes, but he becomes conflicted about it as time goes on.

could schlatt just be using fundy and filling his head with empty praise? sure, i couldnt fault you at all for that interpretation, its perfectly valid. BUT, i dont think so. he seemed genuinely shocked to see fundy oppose him on nov 16th. remember, he didnt know fundy was a spy.

in that moment he realizes just HOW alone he is and always has been. and its a tragic moment: the last person he had, the person he himself mightve truly CARED about left him just like everyone else. he was alone, truly and fully. even his allies were only there out of obligation and bc of him paying.

he knows his health has been failing him. he cant even swim due to muscular issues but he refuses see a doctor about it because he refuses to let himself be seen as weak.

hell, one could argue that issue leads to his abraisive and abusive behavoir in relationships: he refuses to let himself be true and genuine to anyone, there always has to be a wall and a proud perfect persona. its part of why hes a great villain both in narrative and to watch as a casual fan: just like c!wilbur, he's playing an act.

hes a foil and a parallel to wilbur. both are men who hide their true selves behind a certain role or persona they feel they have to play while they hide their crumbling health (schlatt's more physical and wilbur's more mental). both experience their rise and fall. but wilbur isnt despised, even if he thinks he is, while schlatt isnt truly loved by anyone, even if he thinks he is.

most of all, their deaths couldnt be more different. wilbur went out with a bang. a large dramatic scene fit for a storybook, with a long monologue and cinematic final blow ALL made to fit how he saw himself in a story and simply filling a required roll. but schlatts death is practically overlooked (especially in comparison to wilburs death and everything else that happened that day).

he built his entire persona about being this massive, larger than life powerful guy but he died small, weak, and frail to his own failing body. its... pitiful, honestly. it doesnt feel fitting, it feels wrong. his life up that point demanded drama, but his death was nothing more than... an accident, almost. unintentional. clumsy. its fucking brilliant.

#dream smp #schlatt #quackity #fundy #mcyt #THIS IS A LONG POST BUT PLEASE IF YOU CAN READ IT #BC IM RIGHT AND SMART AND SEXY!!!!#also bc he is VERY underrated in a critical analysis way <3 #wilbur #HES THERE TOO #answered #anon #anyway once again anon im sorry for uh. immediately disagreeing but manburg was indeed Not Great #even if he DIDNT directly cause them by an action he took #the time he governed was Generally Bad #like wilbur didnt do fuck shit during lmanberg era BUT the citizens in general were happy and fine so he inherently did Better #even if schlatt did equal amounts of Nothing #he did a lot of wrong but like he was tragic abt it so its okay FJDKSLFJKL #anyway time to unapologetically main tag in hopes tumblr doesnt do that top 5 tags thing anymore bc this took so much time and i want attent #dsmp analysis #schlatt analysis #og post #(jeb bush voice) please clap

127 notes · View notes

haworthiaace · 3 years ago

Text

The Case of the Mysteriously Magnified Moon, inspired by recent events on hermitcraft and set in the magic misfits au (check my pinned for masterpost)! Nobody knows why the moon’s been steadily growing over the past few weeks, but detective Scar aims to find out!(chapter two is here!)

Scar hadn’t even noticed it at first.

In the end, it was Ren who eventually brought the astronomical anomaly to his attention. But could you really blame him? He had only been back on Hermitcraft for a few days after a much needed off-server vacation. Scar had found it a little suspicious that nothing had gone catastrophically wrong in his absence, but he chalked it up to a rare moment of good luck. He should have known things were never that easy when the hermits were involved.

Scar was in the middle of sorting through his chests when his attention was diverted to the sound of rockets outside his door. A few seconds later Ren strolled inside, an easygoing smile on his face.

Oh well, I wasn’t really making much progress anyways. Scar set down the shulker he was about to look through in order to greet his surprise houseguest. “Hey Ren, what brings you around these parts?”

“Oh y’know, just seeing the sights. I haven’t been to Boatem in a while.” Ren leaned on a counter, apparently opting for small talk before asking Scar for whatever it was he actually needed.

Scar just raised an eyebrow. He may not have been the best at picking up on things, but even he could tell that Ren was in need of some magical assistance.

The werewolf maintained eye contact for a few seconds before giving in with a sigh. “Alright, you’ve caught me. I’ve been a little worried about the moon.”

“The moon?”

“Yeah, the moon.”

“Aren’t you always a little worried about the moon?” Since he had joined up with Doc, Ren hadn’t come to Scar for help with his transformation. The fact that he was asking for Scar’s help when the full moon was still a week away was odd to say the least.

“Well yeah, but it’s- it’s big dude, is that gonna…?” Ren tilted his head at Scar’s bemused expression. “Have you not noticed?”

“I’m gonna go with probably not.”

“Oh! Right, you haven’t been on the server for a while.” Ren pulled out his communicator, showing Scar a picture sent in the chat a week ago. It was a picture of Grian with his back to the camera and his arms spread wide. In front of him was the moon, and wow Ren wasn’t kidding. It was at least twice as large as it used to be, and strangely enough it was full despite the previous full moon being several weeks before the timestamp on the photo.

“Wait, has the moon been full every night?”

“Yes! That’s one of the weird things about it. We didn’t even notice it was full at first because I’ve been completely normal. I haven’t transformed since the last real full moon.” He pocketed his communicator again. “I came here to ask you if all this moon weirdness would affect my transformation at all. I don’t want Doc to be completely blindsided by something wild happening, y’know?”

Scar thought that wild was par for the course with those two, but he pondered Ren’s request nonetheless. “Well your transformation is time based, it’s not actually caused by the full moon. That’s why nothing’s happened for the past week.” It was really just an unfortunate coincidence that werewolf transformations happened to be intensified by and on the same night as the full moon. But if it was as severe as it was under a normal full moon… “It’ll probably be a lot more intense than you’re used to because there’s more moonlight. It’s like how a cloudy night makes it easier, but the opposite.”

“...So you’re saying we should get some obsidian?”

“And snacks. You’re gonna lose a lot of energy, so snacks for the next day are very important.” Scar nodded sagely, as was his wizardly right. “Why is the moon so big though? It seems like a weird prank for somebody to pull.”

“Nobody knows, or at least nobody’s said anything. We’re pretty sure it’s been getting bigger over the past few weeks but we haven’t actually been paying attention for very long, so who knows?” Ren shrugged, seemingly unbothered by the secrecy behind the strange happenings.

Scar however, wasn’t content to sit by and watch this all play out. “Ren, do you know what this means?” Judging by Ren’s expression he absolutely did not know what it meant. “It means we’ve got a mystery on our hands! This is a case for detective Scar: The Case of the Mysteriously Magnified Moon!”

Ren snickered. “You gonna get Grian to help you out with that? I hear he’s an experienced detective.”

“No! In fact, he’s at the top of my suspect list.” Scar searched through his mess, eventually giving up and conjuring his quarry: a blank book and quill, perfect for his top secret case file, and an old fashioned detective outfit. If he was going to solve this mystery he had to look the part.

“I’d better get going if I’m going to find the culprit, I’ll see you later Ren!”

“Good luck my dude!” Ren waved from the doorway as Scar activated his elytra, gliding down to land in a tree. He opened the leather cover of the book, jotting down some notes before formally starting his investigation.

The Case of the Mysteriously Magnified Moon

Suspects:

Mumbo and Grian: magical abilities plus a penchant for mischief. Number one suspects, investigate immediately

visit Hypno to see if it’s an illusion or a transformation

ask X if anything is weird server-wise (other than the moon)

His notes prepared, Scar jumped less than gracefully down from the branch and started to make his way toward Midnight Alley.

#hermitcraft #hermitblr #magic misfits au #goodtimeswithscar #rendog #moon's big #im posting this on ao3 as well if youd prefer to read it there #this is pretty much going to be silly interactions between hermits

34 notes · View notes

knifeewifee · 5 years ago

Text

Into the Dark Tamaki x Fem! Reader

A/N: WOW this took fucking FOREVER, But I’m super proud of it! I didn’t proof read the last bit cause I’m LAZY but I hope yall like it!

This is in a Apocalypse AU. There are no Quirks in this AU. Female Reader

TW: NSFW, Gore, Death, Violence, Some Blood, SelfHarm ish, Kinda Angsty

Tag list: @strawbirb @heroheads @caprisun-calories @hummusatune @honeytama @we-mentally-unstable @redflannel @engel-hageshii

Check out the others here!: https://lady-bakuhoe.tumblr.com/post/620733945423740928/here-is-another-nsfw-collaboration-for-the-bnharem

Word Count: 4.3 k ish

------------------------------------------------------------------

The irony of the situation was not lost on you. It has been over a year since the mysterious disease that spread worldwide had first come around. There was no real name for this infection other than calling those who were infected ‘Vampires’ or ‘The Dead Ones’. There’s only one real way of being infected and that's to have one of the infected’s blood mix with your own in some way or another. They always show the same feature. Sharp teeth and claws, inhuman speed, strength and the most dangerous of them all, a never ending hunger for human blood. So strong that the ‘vampires’ become bloodthirsty and violent monsters who are more than willing to tear into the throats or limbs of their loved ones to quench an almost never ending need for the crimson liquid. Once infected there was no way of turning back. Mostly because you were, in fact dead as a doornail. You can’t reverse death.

When the disease first came around the only option was to kill them. Despite their strength and speed it wasn’t so hard. They were weak to the sun and always burned in a horrific way into ash. The smell of burning flesh was so strong around that time. Another way to kill them was to take off their heads. Which wasn’t as easy. They could heal their bodies quickly and if you miss it almost guaranteed your death by the monster.

Once they were changed they were no longer the one you loved or knew. Most aren’t even sure if they remember who they were before they were changed. They attack with no remorse. So they ended the same way.

Which is why you find your situation so.. Disheartening. You sat on the wooden crate staring at the dark haired man in front of you. Tamaki Amajiki was someone who you didn’t know well before this whole event happened. His anxiety was an ever flooding emotion that got in his way of making friends. He sat next to you in your animal science class and his shyness always made it difficult to start a conversation with the man. Despite this your heart would always flutter at the sound of his soft voice whenever he did speak. When he did speak his passion was conveyed in a way like no other. You could see it in his dark colored eyes. The sparkle in them when he talked about how he wanted to become a vet to help animals in need.

His kindness didn’t stop at animals though, he was also incredibly kind to people as well. More than willing to help others in need. Which is how you both ended up in this situation. Tamaki was chained to the brick wall. The gray metal shined dimly in the little candle light there was. You watched him softly as small whines of pain left his lips. You hated to see him this way.

While out gathering supplies you were attacked and Tamaki protected you. Unfortunately he was badly injured from it. You don’t know how but at some point the vampire must have bled onto Tamaki, because now he’s on the floor in front of you as one of the infected. You know that you’re supposed to get rid of them. To stop the spread of this, but over the year you have spent together you had fallen deeply in love with the timid dark haired man. You couldn’t bring yourself to hurt him. So instead you chained him up in the basement of a cabin that the two of you had found way out into the forest in the mountains away from the dangerous cities.

This was a stupid thing to do, this could get you killed but the fear of death didn’t scare you. Tamaki would never hurt you. He is far too kind and caring to do that. Not on purpose anyways.

When you first met him one year ago he was timid but had a kind heart that you found to be his best trait. Over the time that you had spent with him you learned more things about him. You learned he looked up to his best friend Mirio. You learned how hard Tamaki worked. You could see the passion in his eyes, you knew no matter how much anxiety he had that Tamaki would do his best no matter what.

You thought that he’d become a great vet. That was before everything went to hell. When this mysterious disease first appeared it spread fast and took down large cities, Like Tokyo, New York and Shanghai in only a matter of days. Law enforcement and medical workers were affected first since they came to the aid of those injured and infected. Without reinforcements and medical care many people died or were unprotected. The ‘vampires; were mindless and violent. No one was sure if they could even talk or communicate in any other way other than ungodly screaming. Like the hunger they suffered was so painful they could feel it in their very souls.. If they had one anymore that is. They attack any and all without prejudice. Blood covered the streets and the inside of homes. It was clear to most that leaving the city was the best option. If only it had been that easy.

You did what most people did and packed up your car to leave. You didn’t pack much, some clothes, pictures, food and water. You knew this would last a long time and packing light was your best option. It hurt to leave some of your things, to leave precious memories behind, but at this moment, survival was what was important. You didn’t have any family or much friends for that matter. Not anymore. All of the streets leading out of the city were packed with cars as far as you could see. It seems you weren’t the only one with common sense. After an hour night fell over the streets like a suffocating blanket, you felt uneasy. Nothing was moving.. Why weren’t the cars moving?

That's when you heard it. Screaming, it wasn’t just from one person. It was from many. Young and old, men and women. All their screams echoed down the packed streets. You panicked and slid into your back seat grabbing canned food, water, a shirt and pants into a backpack and slung it over your shoulder, there was no way in hell you were gonna sit here like a pig to the slaughter. You exited your car with a machete in hand and weaved and dodged around cars keeping low. How could you have been so stupid? You put yourself in a bad position. Surrounded by people in a place you couldn’t move, you needed to get out of here.

You didn’t want to die. Not yet, you wanted to do so much. You wanted to be so much. Though those plans are ruined now that you look back. You were disoriented by a scream. This scream wasn’t far away. In fact this scream was right behind you. You turned and saw it standing over the body of a young woman. You could hear her downing in her own blood as that thing tore into her throat with a god awful sound that you could never describe in a way that would truly express how horrid it was. No amount of horror movies could prepare you for a sound like that. One that made your stomach turn and your heart break. The glass of her car window laid on the ground, her hands gripping at it, like she was trying to look for some sort of weapon to protect herself. You could see the desperate fight in her eyes. One of someone, who wasn’t ready to die yet. Soon her body went limp. Her blood colored the street and her car like paint.

You slid behind a car and covered your mouth. You wanted to sob, scream or try to help her but you knew there was no helping her, she was gone. You steadied your breathing and looked around. Was that the only vampire here right now? Was there still hope of getting the fuck out of this situation? You couldn’t keep yourself still, you wanted to run. You wanted to get out of there. You didn’t want to be like her. Suddenly you felt something on your neck, something that both terrified you and sent your heart into despair. The smell of copper heavy on its rotting breath. You turned your head to see it staring at you with sharp golden eyes that practically glowed in the darkness that surrounds you.

It was mere inches from you, and yet your body wouldn’t move. Fear etched its way into your bones and muscles stiling you like a statue. Your eyes moved down to its fangs. It’s mouth twisted into some sort of sick grin as its clawed and disfigured hand reached out towards you. That's when the situation hit you. You need to fucking MOVE. NOW. It was like the cement in your bones disappeared as you bolted from your hiding place. You had never moved so fast in your life your legs and lungs burned as raced around cars and people.

Just as you thought you had gotten away you feel a sharp pain in your side and your legs turn to jelly under you. Your face hits the rough asphalt hard, bits of rock digging into your hands, knees and cheek. The matchette you once held thrown out of reach. You let out a whimper of pain. Not from the fall but the burning hot pain in your side. Like someone pushed hot steel through your skin. The taste of copper filled your mouth. A string of curses leaves your lips as you desperately try to crawl away. This wasn’t how you were going to die. Not by one of those things. You were NOT going to be an unsatisfying meal to one of those vampires.

You felt something grab your leg with sharp dagger like nails digging into your ankle. You kick at it with your other leg screaming as you desperately try to fight. ‘Is this karma?’ You thought. ‘ Am I being punished for standing by while others died in front of me?’ A sob wrecked through your body as you turned clawing at the ground trying to reach for your only weapon.

“L-LEAVE HER ALONE!” the familiar erupted through the night. It felt like everything was in slow motion as you turned to see the face of the timid man who used to sit next to you in your class and the now headless vampire who had your life in it’s hands.

Before you could even react to what had just happened you were wrapped into Tamaki’s arms and lifted up. Tamaki didn’t say a word. In fact he didn't even really look at you as he ran through the cars and into the grass that separated the road and the thick forest that leads to the mountains. His breathing was uneven and panicked as he bolted past the tree line and into the dark forest.

That was how the two of you ended up together in such a fucked up situation. The two of you wandered through the forest for days until the two of you found an abandoned cabin at the base of the mountains, the thickest part of what seemed like a never ending woodland. Your wounds weren’t too bad and with the little medical knowledge Tamaki had from class he was able to patch you up. As the weeks went by the two of you became closer.

The more you were with him the more you fell in love with him, and he also fell for you just as hard. On cold nights you’d sleep close to him with his arms wrapped around you. At the time. The small things you two did together made it seem like the world hasn’t fallen apart. Like Everything was okay.

But now. Your world was falling apart all over again. The one person you had, the last person you had in the fucked up world was now one of the vampires. The pain of this realization twisted in your chest. Being stabbed again would hurt less than to watch your love cry out and whimper on the floor, begging for something to eat. But you knew it wasn't food he wanted. Unfortunately the blood of animals didn’t work. Instead it only made him sick and hurt him more. You want to stop his pain. You want to ease his hunger. There was only one way to do that.

You pulled out a pocket knife from your jacket pocket. You pulled off your jacket and tossed it on the cold cement floor. Tamaki looked up at you from the floor, his reddened eyes scanning your form. “W- … What are you doing?” His vision is blurred from pain filled tears but he could clearly see the gleam of the pocket in the dim candle light. He knew exactly what you were going to do. He didn’t want that. Tamaki shifted from his laid down position and tried to move towards you. “S-Stop don’t do that!” The chains pull tightly, stopping him from moving closer.

“Tamaki.. You’re in so much pain. I just want to help you.” You look at him softly as you open the pocket knife and put the blade to your wrist. “I can give you some of my blood. Animal blood is only hurting you more, it makes you sick!”

Tamaki pulls at the metal confindments roughly. The thought of you hurting yourself for him made his chest burn in despair. This was his fault. He got infected and now you’re suffering for his mistakes. “I’m infected. I’m already sick. Don’t … Don’t hurt yourself for me, bunny” He looks at you with sadden eyes as he watches you intently. It made him feel sick that part of him wanted it, that he could smell your scent no matter how far away you were. A sickly sweet smell of burning sugar or incense. One that he craves to always have near him. It only made him hunger for your blood more. To be buried in your scent and devour you whole.

His heart sank as he saw beads of crimson blood slide down your perfect skin. You slowly make your way towards Tamaki with your arm outstretched. “Tamaki Please.” the crack in your voice spoke volumes about how you felt. This is your fault. You wanted to help him, he was in pain because you lost focus, because you didn’t check your surroundings. You had your head in the clouds and forgot what kind of world you live in now.

“Just drink it, Tama.” Tamaki looked away from you and moved back. “N-no. I can’t. I don't want this..” He swiftly turns away and leans his head on the wall behind him. He wraps his arms around himself like if he didn’t he’d fall apart right there. You wrap your arms around him and lean your head against his back. You felt his body tense under your arms. At this point it didn’t matter to you that he may be dangerous. This is Tamaki. A man you loved more than anything, whose kindness knew no boundaries. Nothing would change that, here he is, in an unbearable kind of pain you’d never understand. A never ending hunger you'll never feel, but he still refuses. He’s different. He isn’t like anyone else. He may be a ‘vampire’ now but he’s still the gentle man, with the same soft eyes and caring hands.

“I’m sorry, Tama. This is all my fault. You’re like this because of me.. I just wanted to help you.” Tamaki starts to shake a small groan escaping his lips. “I-I .. You need to move away from me...”

“No.” You rub your face into his shoulder, trying to fight off the tears. “I’m not going anywher-” your words are cut short by a sudden and swift movement from Tamaki pushing you into the freezing brick wall. You never saw Tamaki as being particularly big. He always slouched into himself making him seem much smaller than what he really was. But in this moment he loomed over you, his dark eyes almost shining red in the soft yellow light. You’d be lying if a small bit of fear didn’t grip you in its paralyzing claws.

Tamaki grabbed your hand, the blood from the cut you made earlier smeared across your arm and hand. His thumb moved carefully over the red and raised skin. He never breaks his gaze from your arm as he brings it closer to his trembling lips. Tamaki didn’t want this. He needed this. Overwhelming guilt flooded him as his pale lips pressed against the fresh cut. He couldn’t hold back any longer, the smell of copper and your overstimulating scent made his head spin.

You bring your other arm up and run your fingers gently through his indigo locks. Your face twists slightly with pain as Tamaki’s tongue runs across your self made injury. The crimson honey sliding along this tongue and down throat. It was almost intoxicating, it was addicting. He wanted more. The normally reserved man pressed into you his grip on your arm tightens as he locks his lips around the source of his pleasure. He slides his knee in between your legs, a soft groan radiating from deep in this throat.

“Tama-.. ki?” A heat rushes to your cheeks as soon as you see the look in his eyes. Not the same look he used to have. He has a much darker expression now as his lips release from your wrist and he pressed his forehead to yours. The smell of the rouge liquid heavy on his breath as he leans in closer to your lips. His hands move down to your hips and pulled you flush against his growing bludge. You gasp slightly as his lips lock with yours in a needy and sloppy kiss.

Tamaki bites your bottom lip asking for entrance that you gladly gave him. He slid his tongue into your mouth and the taste of your own blood filled your mouth. There were so many things running through your head at the moment. Should you even be doing this? Was this okay?

You grab onto Tamaki’s shirt to tug him closer to you. The heat of the kiss was leaving you breathless, your mind was reeling from lack of air and the pang of need that radiated from in between your legs. You’ve never done something like this with Tamaki. You’ve never really kissed him before, because he’s always become far too nervous and would hide away. Now here he is taking your breath away in a way you never thought he could. Or would do.

The way Tamaki’s scorching hot tongue explored your mouth made your heart feel like it was going to explode. You wanted to melt into his arms and stay like this for ever. But the moment was cut short when Tamaki pulled away heavily panting, a string of saliva connecting your lips. You almost forgot you hadn’t been breathing, “Tama..”

“I want more..” His lips brush across your neck making your heart leap into your throat. A small whine forms at the back of his throat as he nips gently at your neck. His hands slip under your shirt as he kisses and sucks on your neck leaving small hickies as he works his way to your collarbone.

“I… I want more of you” Tamaki lets out a shaky breath as his fingers make their way to your unprotected plush breasts. You let out a sigh as he pulls your shirt over your head and tosses it to the floor. The cold air of the stale room brushed over your now exposed skin. His sharp eyes trace over every line and curse of your body committing it to memory. A red blush dusted across his face and to his pointed ears as he looks up towards your equally flustered expression.

He looks back towards your breasts cupping one into his hand and taking your sensitive bud into his searing mouth. His sharp fangs drags gently over your skin as he sucks and licks your nipple. His fingertips run gently over your sides causing you to moan his name softly. The sound of your voice only makes his erection that much more unbearable for him. He bites down softly and a small sharp pain fills your breast. The metallic taste of blood ran over his tongue once more as he runs it across the newly made mark. A twinge of guilt setting in this stomach at the small whimper that radiates from your throat. He pulls away slightly, only to have your fingers run through his long soft locks.

“Tamaki.. Do whatever you want with me, I’m yours..” You lean down and place a gentle kiss on his lips, that quickly turns heated once again as his worry and guilt dissipates and is replaced with lust. His hand slides over your bare soft stomach towards the hem of your pants. He quickly unbuttons them and slides his fingers into your panties brushing his fingers against your silky wet folds.

A shiver runs up your spin as you feel Tamaki’s warm breath against your throat. “You're so wet and warm..” his words dance across your skin as he nips at your pulse point gently. A low grow reverberates from his chest as he slowly rubs circles with his calloused finger over your engorged clit. Your delicate hands quickly cling on to Tamaki’s shirt. A needy moan fills the room. You hips moved on their own begging for more stimulation against his hand. You almost felt embarrassed grinding against his finger like a bitch in heat, but you’ve wanted this for so long. You want Tamaki. You didn’t care about anything else at this moment.

“You’re so pretty like this.. You’re so beautiful. “ Tamaki begins to rub against your greedy clit faster. “Cum for me, bunny. Please” His lips latch into your collarbone kissing and suck eagerly leaving his mark. Your cries of pleasure become stuck in your throat and all you can let out are choked out whines and praise as the coil in your stomach begins to tighten rapidly. You pussy empty pussy clenching around nothing. You wanted him so badly. The feeling of euphoria washes over your quacking body as your orgasm washes over you. You bury your face into Tamaki unable to hold yourself up anymore as his fingers continue their assault against your now overstimulated clit.

“Tamaki, Please. I want you so bad.” With your words Tamaki helped you pull off your remaining clothes. He unbuckles his pants and pulls his cock out. It was much thicker than you thought it would be. A small bit of panic runs through you as you begin to wonder if that would fit in you. You push the thoughts to the side as you run your fingers over his hot shaft. He pushes you back into the wall pulling you around his hips, his hands cup around your ass holding you up. The cold metal of his chains press into your skin causing a chill to run through your body. You wrap your arms around his neck looking for any kind of support. The feeling of his precum covered tip running over your entrance set your body on fire.

His names fell from your lips to implore him to take you. To finally make you, his. His sensitive tip presses into your cut without much resistance, inch by inch his member stretches your wall. His fingers dig into the flesh of your ass as he bottoms out inside you. A loud moan rips through his throat as the taut ring of your entrance squeezes around him.

Before you could become used to the size of him inside you his hips began to move. Your legs wrap securely around his lower back as you cry his name with each needy thrust. His thrusts are irregular and fast slamming into you without thought. His lips find yours in a passionate and burning kiss. His moans fill your mouth as his hips snap into yours. The feeling of his cock rubbing against your tight walls made your head spin. You hadn’t noticed the look in his eyes as he kissed your jaw and down towards your throat once again.

A scorching pain fills your body as Tamaki’s fangs skin into the soft skin of your neck. A small string of sorrys leaves him as he laps up the small river of crimson honey. He sucks your blood desperately as his pace picks up and becomes much harder. The pain in your neck and pussy sends you over the edge again as your body is once again hit with another orgasm. Your nails dig into Tamaki’s shoulder as you press your head into the stone wall.

The head of his cock kisses the entrance of your cervix and his sloppy movements become slower. You could feel his cock twitch inside you. A loud groan radiates from the back of his throat as his cock spits ropes of cum into your pussy, filling you up. A hiss of release bruisers across your neck as he kisses the bite mark on your neck in apology.

“I’m sorry… Did I-I hurt you?” he slowly lets you down as his knees finally buckle underneath him. He wraps his sinewy arms around your waist and lays his head in your shoulder. Taking in your sweet scent. You shake your head and run your hands down his back.

“No.. You didn’t” The two of you stay like that on the floor for a while. You didn’t mind this.. You didn’t mind that he was no longer human. If this was the life you were meant to have them so be it. You’ll gladly go into the dark with him. Tamaki is different from the rest. You love him and he loves you.

#bnharem collab #bnharem #tamaki amakiji #tamaki amajiki x reader #bnha #n-s-f-w #apocalypse AU #amajiki #amajiki x reader #tamaki x reader #tamaki #knifeewifee art #knifeewifee fic

649 notes · View notes

crescairis · 4 years ago

Note

I was wondering if you had another source that otherlinkers were explicitly excluded from the original definition of otherkind in 1990? The source on AnOtherWiki leads to a 2001 FAQ that doesn't mention anything like that. Also, otherlinkers aren't the same thing as KFF.

(just as a warning, this is going to be a LONG post, but i'd rather not put it under the cut for archival reasons, in the case that for some reason this blog disappears)

firstly, i'd like to apologize for phrasing things as if KFFs and otherlinkers were the same thing; a better phrased way to say things would be for me to say that i think many KFFs would be otherlinkers, were they to acknowledge that their experiences don't fit the definition of otherkin.

something else i'd also like to note that i've been thinking about (while it isn't exactly related to this question) is that perhaps people are misinterpreting the terms "voluntary" and "involuntary".

i feel that many people think "voluntary" simply means the initial decision to willingly take on an identity, which is, in part, true! however, voluntary identities are very likely to become involuntary, simply because it becomes too emotionally/mentally difficult to separate oneself from the identity that they've chosen.

being drawn to something, or someone, enough to take it on as an identity can often be a sign of something deeper! i would see this as a form of awakening in and of itself—like cracking open a geode, or perhaps like putting on training wheels before you experience the real thing.

but back to your first question: the way i initially phrased that post was also rushed, as we were trying very hard to write it during a single lunch break at work.

the term otherlinker is a very recent invention (coined in 2018 on the alt-h discord server, while copinglink was coined in 2015 by who-is-page), as being otherkin has always largely been considered a serious, personal experience. only recently have people NEEDED to specify that it's involuntary, so the only sources i can give you are ones that cite otherkinity as being intended as a serious identity, as well as those that state that otherkinity is not as shallow as a game or roleplay.

also important to note is that many of these pages were made and existed before fictionkin were a largely documented (let alone accepted) presence, thus they are scarcely mentioned, (and typically with skepticism or even scorn,) save for on their own, smaller pages. for our own personal comfort, we will not be listing sources that discredit fictionkinity completely.

firstly, here's a full timeline of otherkin history by orion scribner, to show the scope we're looking at

Otherkin Lexicon by Orion Scribner: "Otherkin are real, non-fictional people who identify as other than human. Otherkin identify as creatures from myth and legend, usually elves, faeries, and dragons. This is a sincere identity, not role-play. Many otherkin identify as other than human for spiritual reasons; that is, they classify their identity as otherkin as a personal spiritual belief. Being otherkin is a very individualistic thing: each otherkin reaches his own explanation for how and why he is an otherkin. Some of their common spiritual explanations include that they are other than human in spirit, or they were other than human in past incarnations.187 Although spiritual belief is often involved, “otherkin” isn’t a religion. As such, each person who identifies as otherkin practices whatever religion he individually wants. It has always been the case that most of the otherkin community practices Neo-Pagan religions, and so that religious perspective shapes the common views and ideas in the otherkin community. Some otherkin don’t use spiritual explanations. Some otherkin believe that they are physically other than human, or that their ancestors were."

A Field Guide to Otherkin by Lupa: "The definition for Otherkin I will be using for this book is: a person who believes that, through either a nonphysical or (much more rarely) physical means, s/he is not entirely human. This means that anyone who relates internally to a nonhuman species either through soul, mind, body, or energetic resonance, or who believes s/he hosts such a being in hir body/mind, is in my own definition of Otherkin. Some people do have more stringent standards. However, for the purposes of this book, I am including a wider range of people.

"This is not a roleplaying game. When a person says s/he is a dragon, or a wolf, or an elf, s/he is not referring to a character that s/he only becomes during a gaming session. That which is Other is a constant part of the person; s/he is the Other at all times. Grey, a wolf therian,says it marvelously: “Perhaps I should say that if a being is a color, or a sound, I am two items merged to form a different color/sound. The two are within each other. Sometimes plain to see, sometimes deeply mixed.”"

A Simple Introduction to Otherkin and Therianthropes by Orion Scribner: "Some real people think of themselves as kinds of creatures from mythology. These people call themselves “otherkin.” An otherkin has the belief that he is a creature from mythology, such as an elf. He says that elf is his true self. It is his identity. This is real to him. It isn’t a pretend person that he plays in a game."

The Otherkin Resource Center: "1 : one who identifies with various mythological archetype as vehicles of spiritual evolution and self-expression, similar to Native totemism only with a stronger level of self-identification.

"2 : someone who believes in reincarnation, and that not all of their reincarnations were as a human."

What are Otherkin? by Tirl Windtree: "By far the most common explanation from those who fit the definition (even if they don't claim this specific label) is that whilst their physical forms may be human, their essence, soul or equivalent term is not.

"Of those, the majority make their claim based on reincarnation - what they have been in a previous incarnation so strongly affects their current incarnation that they still identify with it. Obviously this requires a belief in reincarnation, and in the transmigration of souls. Both are reasonably common in a number of religions and spiritual beliefs across the world."

"The most frequent accusation is that all otherkin are lost in fantasy, they've played one too many D&D games and gone over the edge. Personal study seems to indicate this is actually one of the least frequent explanations. Most roleplayers know they are roleplaying, even if they are also otherkin, and roleplaying can be a very useful tool in self exploration."

The Lostkin Project by Gazer: "Otherkin are the supernatural among us. They are the elves, dragons, nymphs, and trolls that used to live more openly amoung humankind. Some are from other dimensions and other places. You may occasionally see them refered to as Otherkind. Otherkin is the more generally accepted term."

Otherkin Coalition by Kreyas: "What is Otherkin?

In a nutshell, Otherkin are a coalition of people who share in common the belief that some internal part of them is somehow incongruent with the rest of the human race. Beyond that, beliefs vary too widely to classify them into any one group.

Some of the most common beliefs are that the soul is somehow different from human. This may go in hand with a belief in reincarnation and “imprinting” (in which a past life as another species leaves an imprint on the soul which is then carried over into the next life), or the individual may believe that this is his/her first life and they are simply different.

Above all, Otherkin is a spiritual belief.

"Are Otherkin really a bunch of delusional, socially maladaptive kids like I read on that website?

NO. As with any group, not everyone fits the stereotype. Any community is going to have its bad apples which stand out in people’s minds better than the typical members. In my experience, Otherkin are usually levelheaded and able to question their beliefs and function in human society.

"Is it a Roleplaying thing?

NO. While some Otherkin may participate in roleplaying, strictly speaking the beliefs are separate from the roleplay - even if they are roleplaying as their identified “kintype”."

Otherkin FAQ v 4.0.1 by Arhuaine, Miaren Crowsdaughrer, Thistile Kachunk, Golden Syrpent, Knight of Ghosts and Shadows, Jarin Dreamsinger and The Crisses: "The Otherkin are those people who believe themselves to be spiritually and/or physically other than human. While mythological species (elves, satyrs, fairies, dragons, and so on) are widely accepted as being included under the term "Otherkin", many people in the community prefer to include aliens, vampires, furries, extraterrestrial humans, and other nonhuman races. A mythological or literary equivalent is not necessary to be included under "Otherkin"; there are types of otherkin that have not shown up in known legends or fiction (star-dragons, Elenari, etc.)."

What are Otherkin, Anyway? by Adnarel: "Otherkin is a term that is generally used to describe people who, In some way or another, physical bodies aside, do not feel that they are “human” in the conventional sense of the word. We (they) feel as though their spirits are not human, nor have they ever been, despite our physical bodies and outward appearance. Some otherkin have testified that they feel that this is their first time on this plane of existence, a.k.a. Earth. Others feel that they have been here numerous times to teach and to heal people. Maybe once they were here in their “true forms”. Otherkin use the term “true form” to describe what they feel to be the shape and nature of their true selves."

What Are Otherkin? by Arhuaine:

"Put simply, someone who is Otherkin feels that they have a soul (or souls) other than human. Usually this encompasses what are commonly regarded as mythical beings such as elves, dragons, fae, satyrs and so on. A broader view of otherkin might also include therianthropes (were-creatures) and those with animal souls (such people are sometimes known affectionately as "furries"), and also perhaps people who consider their souls are alien (often called star-born). The lines between Otherkin and Furries or Star-born are often blurred.

"Most Otherkin feel for most of their lives as though they don't belong. Human society seems alien and unfamiliar in many ways. They may feel isolated and unhappy, yet unable to explain these feelings at first. Then, perhaps they may begin to remember a life other than their own. Sometimes it is not easy to understand such memories, and sometimes the awakening to Otherkin-ness is a difficult and frightening process, especially if they are going through it alone. It is something not easy to share with others, for fear that they may consider you crazy.

"Being Otherkin is not something to crave, nor is it glamorous. It is a difficult and lonely path to tread, and sometimes it seems to bring only sorrow. Memories of loved ones long lost, a home that can no longer be reached, cause great pain. And yet, the life of the Otherkin is not all sadness. It is a life filled with wonder and magic, and a way of looking at the world that humans can never understand. Because magic is so much a part of an Otherkin's outlook, they may be drawn to Paganism or other New-age philosophies."

Are You 'Kin? by Gazer: "To really find out if you are otherkin takes searching. No, not on the internet, inside. You have to reach inside yourself and really look at yourself. This ,for the most part, is an inner journey. You have the answers, not me or anyone else. If you are otherkin then it is a PART of you, but you may be the only person able to find it.

The best others can do to help you is to provide pointers. Show you ways to search inside yourself, tell you how they found something inside themselves. We can hold a mirror up to you, but you won't see anything unless YOU do the looking, and what we see from our side of the mirror may not be the truth."

Otherkin Phenomena: "Otherkin are people who believe themselves to be something other than a human being on a spiritual, psychological, energetic and some even on a biological level, and choose to identify with that non-human fragment of themselves to the point where they count it as a permanent and ingrained part of their personal mythology and/or identity."

and there's plenty more! i'm just tired

i hope this helped answer your question, and perhaps gives others some insight as well!

#otherkin #alterhuman #asks #long post

41 notes · View notes

masked-puppetmaster · 4 years ago

Note

hey, i saw you asked a while ago why dream & techno apologists are apologists for those characters (and you liked a bunch of my posts concerning that, actually) i was wondering if you still have any more questions - and also i wanted to ask if you wanted to talk a bit about c!tommy and what makes you like him so much? like is it just the emotional attachment to him? is it the trauma? anything specific about the way in which he is written? i've always watched his pov & i'm very curious! / - red

yo yo yo hey! I think I understand it a bit more now, for the dream & techo apologists, I think I’m still a bit confused when it comes to technoblade. I see a lot about people only using him as a weapon/ him not being able to trust people / no one sticking up for him and I’m not sure where it comes from? In all fairness, I only know him as the guy who executed Tubbo / spawned withers but im assuming that’s in large part because I came into the story so late (iirc I didn’t really get into the dsmp until around doomsday, and I got most information of past events just by like. osmosis or reading wikis) so I might simply just not have enough information on techno to get it. Like, he executed Tubbo under a lot of pressure iirc but that doesn’t take away from the fact he did execute him? or things with the withers, I know technoblade doesn’t like the government and I’d go as far as to say he has a point, but was it really necessary to destroy lmanburg (iirc, multiple times). I know he was mad, but I feel like he shouldn’t have taken in that far, like from what I see and understand it’s like yes he had his points but he hurt people and doesn’t seem to care that he hurt anybody, just kinda stands there assuming he’s right about everything and not rlly looking at the situation from anyone else’s perspective. That being said like I said I came into the story really late and so my arguments might be able to be chalked up to just a lack of proper context, and even if I’m kinda annoyed at Technoblade’s behavior I still like him as a character & when techno does stream I enjoy the content so I’m not like a technoblade hater or anything I just don’t see why people can be apologists for him bcos from my pov he’s just kind of hurt people and not taken any personal responsibility for it (I mean this as in acknowledging to himself he was ever in the wrong; ex. The whole Tommy / techno betrayal situation which I think was a p complicated matter to be fair he just keeps saying over and over how Tommy betrayed him and it doesn’t seem to me like he’s even bothering to look at the situation from Tommy’s pov or rlly reflect on his own actions at all)

I just rlly like Tommy! I think at least some part of it can be chalked up to Tommy being the first streamer I watched in the dsmp and one of the ones I watch the most from (half the time I’m watching the dsmp it’s a Tommy stream) so there’s just gonna be some inherent bias towards him there like there is with literally any of these streamers. As you put it, it is kinda the trauma, haha. trauma and emotional attachment lol. I think part of it is I relate to him a lot, and I can see where he’s coming from on a lot of things, and I also just like the way his character is written. Smthn abt him that people have pointed out is that his trauma isn’t pretty and romanticized it’s ugly and yk he acts out and all that, which I appreciate. I can see where he’s coming from on a lot of things or at least understand why he thinks the way he does. I like seeing him learn and grow I like seeing his arcs both personally with himself and with other people. He’s an interesting and complex character and he’s been through a lot and I think it’s just super interesting to see how what he’s gone though affects his mental state and his actions as a character, like just from like a mental analysis standpoint there’s a lot to talk about which I think is pretty cool. this isn’t to say that he’s never fucked up or done anything wrong, because he has, but to be fair so has everyone else on this server I don’t think there’s a single member of the server who’s done nothing wrong (except maybe like. Charlie. Charlie my beloved). He’s made his mistakes but every good character fucks up that’s what makes them a good character is their flaws and so with the ways that he’s messed up and the ways he’s hurt people I’m an apologist because I can see why he acts that way, where the feelings and actions are coming from and I can forgive him for it because I understand the why. Also I just think the punishments he’s received for his actions are rlly unfair, easy ex with exile he did something many people on the server have already done at one point or another and was exiled and mentally broken down over it and rlly it’s just been like one thing after another and even if he’s made mistakes he gets way more harshly punished than I think was fair. I’ve seen people talk about how annoying and selfish his character is and when I read the posts (not all of them, there’s a nice chunk of people who are civil about it) it just seems like they’re not rlly thinking abt his character and his experiences. I’ll see people explain his signs of trauma and say it’s annoying because it’s not soft crying trauma it’s messy acting out trauma which it’s just like you do not understand this at all, do you? Or with the discs, I’ll be honest with you here. I will defend Tommy’s attachment to these stupid little music discs till the day I die. Why can’t he have his discs? They’re his , they’re not even that valuable outside of the fact that they’re his, why can’t he have things? why isn’t he aloud to have items he’s attached to without someone taking them for the sole reason of he likes them. And all I see is people saying he is selfish and cares about the discs more than people, which is literally disproven in the rp. Ranboo flat out says he’s not selfish, when Tommy takes the blame for George’s house (also keeping in mind here tommy and ranboo barely knew each other at the time, and if Tommy was actually selfish he could’ve very easily dragged Ranboo down with him) and when it comes to the discs he’s given up the discs multiple times in favor of helping other people (he gave them up for lmanburg, and then for Tubbo I think twice actually) and the one time he told someone the discs were worth more than they were, that was the moment yeah made him realize he didn’t like who he was becoming and he immediately backtracked and allowed the disc to be handed over. TL;DR he’s not selfish he’s just got a lot of strong attachments and his attachments are both his greatest strength and his greatest weakness. And he’s a kid, he’s been though a lot of things, he’s got a lot of trauma he’s dealing

with and it’s not always pretty but he gets better, he has his arcs and he gets better and learns from some of his actions, and I think looking at him and his yk. Timeline and character development and arcs and his whole like mental deal and just general character choices are super interesting and I find it fun, as someone who enjoys character analysis, and all in all I love him I relate to him in some ways and some of it also might just be emotional attachment and bias towards him as Tommy being one of my comfort streamers

& it’s fully possible someone could have just as much of an argument for c!techno, my deal w looking at c!tommy making mistakes and c!techno making mistakes and being able to be an apologist for Tommy and not for techno is more about me understanding tommy’s character better and understand the reasoning and the why behind the things he says and does, vs. techno who i dont really get and i can’t be an apologist for him if I don’t understand anything hes doing or why he’s doing it and then seeing him over and over dismiss other peoples perspectives and never rlly reflecting on himself (not to say Tommy couldn’t use at least a little of that himself- I am Looking over at his relationship w Jack Manifold lol) can be kinda frustrating but as I said earlier that might just be me not knowing all the proper context

I could probably write more about Tommy especially when it comes to the whole technoblade vs Tommy thing but this post is already way longer than you probably ever wanted to read so I’ll stop now I’m sorry I’m just hyperfixated haha and yk if anyone wants to like add arguments or points or if you or someone rlly likes technoblade or dream or whoever and wants to talk to me about that go ahead I encourage that like I rlly enjoy having those conversations w ppl provided theyre civil abt it bc like we’ve all said a million times over before eveyone in the dsmp is an unreliable narrator and you’re just going to automatically have a bias towards a character if you watch their POV most and all that so. Yk I am a tommy apologist but I watch his streams most and I’m also just emotionally attached so anything I can say has to be taken w a grain of salt bcos I’m biased towards his character

#Long post #ask #anon #red #tommyinnit #c!tommy #technoblade #c!techno #c!technoblade #DSMP #dream smp #Tommy apologist #technoblade apologist #I’m so sorry I talked way more than I intended to whoops !!!!#That’s my two cents

26 notes · View notes

cheri-translates · 4 years ago

Text

[CN] Fireworks Event - Victor

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for an event which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

Contains references to Night Dream Date and Fairytale Date (available in EN)

Previous section: here

3rd Anniversary Masterlist: here

Prior to the Carnival, there were questions posed in the Go See You feature which affects which scenario the player sees during the Fireworks Event:

Question 1: Having gone to the amusement park a number of times, which attraction was your favourite?

Option A: As compared to the attractions, the fountain left the deepest impression!

Option B: The float parade! I really want to participate in it again!

Option C: An attraction consisting of a rapid fall. [no footage found]

Question 2: Think about what the “perfect day” you clamour about every day looks like specifically.

Option A: For you to smile a little more.

Option B: To stick together with you.

[ PART ONE ]

As the day gradually darkens, tangerine light from the setting sun dyes the clouds crimson. Various coloured lights are illuminated within the carnival.

MC: What should we try as the final attraction...

In order to round up this day in the most perfect manner, I look at the guide map before me, in serious thought.

Victor: Let’s go to this place.

A step faster than me, Victor takes my hand, moving forward without hesitation.

MC: This is...?

[ Option A: As compared to the attractions, the fountain left the deepest impression! ]

MC: The fountain plaza!

The glittering and translucent water droplets meld with the setting sun, casting a colourful brilliance.

The scene before me is similar yet different, and it makes me recollect that trip to the amusement park I thought we had missed out on.

The shock that the amusement park had been rented out completely still lingers in my heart.

Victor: The only person to feel so strongly about fountains would be you.

MC: Do you know the reason for that?

I smile as I look at Victor, watching as he sighs and folds his arms in front of his chest.

Victor: Because we watched those fountains together. As compared to the fountains, what’s more important is the memories related to them. Things which carry memories are always more captivating than other objects.

MC: ...

I’m rendered speechless as Victor steals all my lines.

Seeing that my originally planned script is no longer of use, I can only nod blankly, letting my cheeks flush.

Victor seems to be pleased with what he sees before him. He chuckles while shaking his head, returning his gaze to the fountains.

The faraway water columns are reflected in my irides. They twirl elegantly in the air before falling, crashing against another rising column of water, creating rays of light.

Victor: I like more things now.

Without warning, Victor speaks.

MC: What?

Victor: Fountains, Shiba Inu dolls, and all sorts of miscellaneous items. From a certain point in time, I started liking more and more things.

Memories from the past flash before my eyes. Those very trivial fragments string together like pearls, sparkling and dazzling.

MC: Isn’t that pretty good?

I tilt my head, leaning against his shoulder.

Victor: It’s not bad.

Victor lifts his hand naturally, encircling my waist gently.

Perhaps due to the ongoing parade, or visitors seizing of this chance to experience other attractions, there aren’t many people at the fountains.

We monopolise the sunset and the gleaming reflections from the water, tranquil happiness entering my heart along with the rising water droplets.

As the final ray of light of sunset dips beneath the horizon, the fountain performance officially announces its end.

Walking towards another place, I suddenly realise that one question has been neglected.

[ Option B: The float parade! I really want to participate in it again! ]

I look at the bustling parade in front of me.

MC: The parade!

As dusk gradually sets in the amusement park, the lively performers and magnificent parade vehicles move forward together with the music.

Along with the lights, the images before me overlap with my memories.

MC: Victor, do you still remember the first time we visited the amusement park? Just like this time, we tried all sorts of attractions, and then watched the parade.

Victor: Mm. I won't forget.

MC: With this thought in mind, whether it’s the time we sat in the parade vehicle, or how we took the merry-go-round together today... I seem to have truly become a princess from a fairytale.

Victor: Just that counts as being a princess?

MC: Eh? What counts as being a princess then?

Could Victor have an unexpectedly wise opinion on this topic?

I look at Victor, waiting for his response in anticipation.

Victor: The ability to handle governmental, state, and diplomatic affairs - these are the most fundamental...

MC: Wait, wait. I don’t think we’re talking about the same type of princess.

As expected of a Victor-style response - in just a second, it can ruin the romantic atmosphere surrounding us.

MC: I’m referring to those in fairytales.

Victor: For example?

MC: Mm...

MC: Beautiful dresses, elegant and dignified, able to eat delicious food and adorable snacks...

MC: Most importantly, they their own Prince Charming!

Victor: That’s all?

After listening to my response, Victor chuckles softly.

MC: What’s wrong? Don’t look down on this “princess dream”, okay? This is the purest dream of a young woman...

Victor: I’m not looking down on it. I just wanted to ask how this differs from the days you’re leading right now.

This question renders me speechless, and I can only stare at him blankly.

The parade vehicle passes by, and large volumes of flower petals drift around us.

I just hope that the light is sufficiently dim, so that he wouldn’t see that my face is even redder than the sky.

As the final ray of sunset dips beyond the horizon, the parade officially announces its end.

Observing the gradually dissipating crowd, I suddenly realise that one question has been neglected.

[ PART ONE ENDING ]

This isn’t an attraction Victor would be interested in. Why did he bring me here so decisively?

I search my memories for a long while, and a possible answer finally surfaces in my mind.

A few days ago, he suddenly asked me a few questions out of nowhere.

[ flashback begins ]

Victor: Having gone to the amusement park a number of times, which attraction was your favourite?

MC: Why the sudden question?

Victor: So, what’s your answer?

MC: Mm... let me think...

MC: If I had to mention one...

[ flashback ends ]

I didn’t expect that he was already making preparations for this trip to the amusement park since that time.

Perhaps seeing that I'm smiling in an overly silly manner, Victor asks a question.

Victor: What’s that silly smile for?

MC: Victor, do you place special importance on this carnival?

Victor: What kind of a question is that?

MC: I’ve already noticed! Those questions you asked a few days ago - they were in preparation for today, weren’t they?

Victor: Haven’t I always been practising what I preach and telling you about the importance of doing research and preparation beforehand?

Victor gives me a blank look - the exact same expression as when I hand him a proposal which doesn’t pass.

But as of today, his outward appearance no longer dupes me!

MC: Thank you. I didn’t think you’d really remember my answers, and even fulfil them for me. I feel especially happy right now.

I take his hand, the corners of my lips curling upwards involuntarily.

Victor: Which one of your wild imaginations do I not remember? In contrast, I want to forget them.

His tone is gentle, and a more tender sentiment surfaces in the deep pools of his eyes.

MC: But... isn’t something missing?

Perhaps attributable to the extraordinary tenderness in his expression, I’m given the courage to be “insatiable”.

[ Option A: For you to smile a little more. ]

MC: Since you also asked me what I’d consider a “perfect day”, where’s the smile I want to see more of?

Hearing this, Victor rubs the bridge of his nose in resignation.

Victor: Haven’t I smiled enough today?

MC: Not enough. Aren’t you pulling a long face right now? Hurry and smile a little?

Most likely unable to win against the expectant blinks I'm sending him, Victor sighs heavily once more. Then, he lifts the corners of his lips in an unnatural manner.

MC: Pfft...

MC: That won’t do. That’s just movement of your facial muscles. It doesn't count as a smile.

I hop forwards by a few steps, then turn my head to give Victor a demonstration.

MC: This is how you smile.

Victor: [sighs]...

He reaches out to pinch my cheek.

Victor: Always so silly. From the moment we met, it seems you haven’t changed.

MC: On the other hand, you’ve changed quite a lot. You’re more gentle, and you smile much more. It isn’t like how it was in the past either, where your smile would give Goldman a scare.

[ Option B: To stick together with you. ]

MC: Since you also asked me what I’d consider a “perfect day”, why aren’t we sticking together as agreed?

Sure enough, Victor’s eyebrows furrow deeply once he hears this.

Victor: Your memory is always bafflingly good when it comes to these things.

MC: Of course. So? There are only a few more hours till the end of my “perfect day”.

I run a few steps forward, then turn my head and offer my hand to Victor.

MC: I’m already in front of you, and you aren’t going to hold on tightly?

With a long sigh, Victor steps forward and grips my hand tightly.

Victor: I've been holding on to it tightly since a long time ago.

He exerts slightly more pressure. Then, he steadily and naturally wraps his arms around my waist, encircling me into his arms.

I’ve forgotten when I started getting used to holding hands with him, and getting used to having his warmth by my side.

Victor: I’m wondering when these habits developed.

MC: Are you criticising me again?

Victor: I’m referring to myself.

Victor smiles with a sigh, looking as though he’s seen through me since a long time ago.

Victor: You're always making such a din. Ever since I met you, you don’t seem to have changed. But this is good too.

MC: We’re meant to complete each other. But you’ve changed quite a lot. More frank, and more easy to get close to.

Victor: I was infected by a certain dummy.

[ PART TWO ENDING ]

While Victor says this, he taps my head gently. It’s reminiscent of a complaint, yet is affectionate.

MC: It’s all right, I’ll take responsibility.

Victor: In that case, tell me more about your plan?

MC: First of all...

I step on my tiptoes, helping Victor adjust the tie around his neck which features pictures of small black cats.

MC: I'll fill your life with more adorable things. Like me.

The park starts to announce that the fireworks display is about to begin.

Turning my head, I see the faint, flickering stars in the sky, anticipating the fireworks I’ll be sharing with him.

The first light rises to the sky, announcing that the performance has begun.

Victor: Your proposal still needs slightly more refinement.

The moment the firework blooms, Victor takes my hand off his tie and into his palm. He speaks in a volume only I can hear.

Victor: Think properly about how you’re going to fulfil your bold, visionary words of taking “responsibility”. There’s still a lot of time to come to a conclusion.

In the deep curtain of darkness, the blooming fireworks create mottled colours and speckles of light.

They are of the colour I answered him as my favourite.

When I don’t notice, he always does too much for me that I’m unaware of.

I know that the person holding onto my hand next to me is my life’s answer.

#mlqc #mlqc cn #mlqc spoilers #mlqc victor

70 notes · View notes

technospotatoes · 4 years ago

Text

Y’all Should Be C!Sam Apologists And Here’s Why

Hey I’m back on my apologist hill again, none of you are gonna take me down >:)

This is something I threw together before I give y’all my full analysis post for Las Nevadas Lore (5/22)-- that one is gonna take a bit, so if you’re interested, drop a follow to see when it’s up! (in the meantime you can also take a gander at my other analysis posts as well!)

Some minor content warnings:

brief mentions of torture and manipulation (not in detail)

spoilers for Las Nevadas Lore (5/22)

character death (from previous lore streams)

Drop a follow, reblog, and enjoy :)

With the newest installment of Las Nevadas Lore came more precious interactions of Sam and Quackity; and looking closely at their first scene together, Sam has gone through some small, yet fundamental changes. Despite the fact that the two argue like an old married couple, tiny details about their characters manage to poke through.

Sam: “Well, we haven’t really done anything inherently bad; everything we’ve done, we’ve done it for justice” (27:25)

Quackity laughs at this remark, implying that he knows that what he’s doing isn’t morally “good”

Sam doesn’t seem too concerned about whether torturing Dream is a large issue, because it literally affects nobody on the server. Dream is of no threat at the present time, so therefore, he currently holds no risk to any of the characters whether he is alive or dead within the prison.

Also, Sam knows that Dream is a bad guy, thus fueling his motives-- Sam wants justice from Dream’s actions because he wronged so many people on the server.

This quote also implies that outside of torturing Dream, Sam has no idea of Quackity’s motives or actions (how he’s manipulating people to join Las Nevadas).

Sam: “Are you black mailing [Purpled]? I don’t even know what you’re doing!” (57:26)

this quote supports the previous bullet point.

Sam explicitly states that he has no idea what Quackity’s plans are, in terms of recruitment.

I should also mention that it seems like Quackity and Sam’s communication was cut off immediately as Purpled joined the game-- further supplementing the fact that Sam remains in the unknown about how Quackity and Purpled’s interaction went down. (see 58:50)

I’m not saying that Sam is completely innocent of any actions that he has done, but he has done each with reason. That reason: he literally represents the law.

Sam: “Well, you’re stressing me out, you’re making me break the law and I’m supposed to be the law.” (57:09)

Sam actively knows his role as Warden, and even intends to use it outside of the prison.

You could say he’s pushing excess responsibility on himself to represent the law and such neutrality-- through the way that he protests Quackity’s methods of recruitment. He doesn’t prevent Quackity from going through with his plans, because Sam hasn’t fully “become” the law yet.

This is a very new role to him, so I imagine he’s trying his best to be an active reminder of the law to those he interacts with, even though it may seem unsuccessful at times.

Keep in mind, C!Sam has been through some deep puddles. Being manipulated by the Egg, blaming himself for Tommy’s death, allowing Quackity to torture Dream, letting Ghostbur die [I talked about this here]... among many others (just look at his DSMP wiki lol). Having to uphold the role as Warden (and subsequently, peacekeeper) only adds to the overall emotional weight he bears.

a/n: Most people don’t want to be C!Sam apologists because they’re upset that Ghostbur is dead. Like what lol he was already dead-- we have Wilbur back now WAHOO. Join the Sam apologist club, we have cookies >:D Also, this may not be the best explanation you’ll see on the internet, so if you have questions or comments, feel free to ask! i give u kith *mwah*

tysm for reading-- hope you enjoyed! <3

#dream smp #dream smp lore #las nevadas #awesamdude #quackity #dream smp lore analysis #c!sam apologist #that last quote got me REELING #I CALLED IT HAHA #pls reblog ty <3 #my work

19 notes · View notes

heyybrittannia · 5 years ago

Text

Seasons (in floral)

A/N: This one will likely never go to the dungeon. First time writing for Fatgum, and my first official BNHArem server collab! Little notes on the flowers: gardenia = secret/sweet love; jonquils = return my affections; pink hydrangeas, white lilac, red chrysanthemums = various versions of romantic love; sunflowers = unwavering faith/adoration, unconditional love. This was a fun one! Check out the other collabs! Huge thanks to @lesbian-peanut-writer for the gorgeous banner!! =============================================================

It was all tight smiles and calculated words that were exchanged over dinner. An ignorant man would confuse your cautious nature for simply being another shy blossom waiting for the brisk breeze of his love to pull you from your branch, but you held fast to your tree. As the banal chatter of your date melted into the din of the white tablecloth restaurant, you allowed yourself a brief moment to sink into your thoughts. ** **

Is this what I’m really looking for? Is this all that I’m worthy of?

He was plain-- not that it was a bad thing. With plainness came stability, reason, economy, and yet you yearned for more than settling for mediocrity. Lips stretched taut over your teeth, you nodded and made non-committal noises indicating your attention was still in the same zip code as his inane droning. For a moment, your smile slipped and the warm sensation of your date’s hand wrapping around your own on top of the pressed linen tablecloth ripped you away from your thoughts.

“I’m sorry, am I boring you?”

You finally focused to meet his stern, yet concerned gaze. His strong fingers continued to tighten around your hand, the question shooting through you. Slowly, you shook your head and worried your lip between your teeth, a habit he loathed. Your cheeks flushed with the fire of your embarrassment. Caught between his plain, constant stare and the hum of flatware scraping against fine china and small talk it was all you could do to shrink lower into your seat and move the steamed vegetables around your plate. He withdrew his hand from yours and settled back into his one-sided conversation. Appetite long gone, you finally dropped your fork and placed your napkin on the table. The cheque was split evenly, gratitude exchanged, and farewells left at the table in abject silence.

Another failed date for the books, you withdrew deeper into yourself during the walk home, insisting you would be fine without his presence to escort you safely. Half-ignoring his cries of, “Call me when you get home!” you waved in acknowledgement and began your trek through the bustling city. Numbly your feet dragged you through the crowded streets on a path you knew by heart. Once inside the safety of your studio apartment, you pulled your smartphone from your purse. Soft mewling and purring greeted you at the door as a lithe tabby rubbed his head against the soft leather of your boots.

“Hey, trouble,” you crooned down to the animal, abandoning your phone on a desk in the passthrough. He chirped in reply and led you to his appallingly empty food dish. “Sorry, Chubs. I didn't mean to forget.” Kibble tinkled through the open space like bells on Sunday morning. Kneeling, you stroked the cat as his purring ramped up, rivalling any sports car on the street. You lingered with your roommate for the better part of ten minutes as he devoured his fill and basked in your rapt attention. The chime of your ring-tone pulled you from the animal, and reluctantly you rose to retrieve the forgotten tech. When you pulled up the notification, your features softened into the sweetest of smiles. Warmth poured from your eyes to the image frozen on your screen.

Toyomitsu is video calling you…

At the push of a button the world melted away and all you saw was the steady, gentle smile of your childhood friend staring back at you.

"Hey," you breathed, tucking a stray hair behind your ear. He snickered and waved.

"Sorry it's been a while since my last check-in, Y/n. How ya been?" You kicked your heels off and slid down the wall to the floor, expression a mix of exasperation and guilt. "That bad, huh?" You shook your head and scoffed. Wordlessly he read you down as if the past five years didn't wedge between you two.

"It is what it is, Toyomitsu-kun." He winced at his surname rolling from your lips like he didn't inherently know your idiosyncrasies. "I think I'm just destined to be alone. Tokyo isn't anything like home," you sighed. He nodded and gave you another megawatt smile, running a large hand through his messy golden hair.

"Well, home just ain't the same without ya. Should come visit! Make a weekend outta it!"

Chubs rubbed his whiskered cheeks against your knee and trilled at the familiar face in your hand curiously. "Ya don't have to answer right away," he continued. "Just think about it, 'kay?"

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The train ride back to Esuha City ate up the majority of your Thursday morning. Earbuds buried deeply in your ears, you watched the world blur outside your window. City turned into field and turned into sprawling city again, and by the time you reached your stop you had your fill of true crime podcasts repeating the same tired tropes in your ears. Clutching your weekender bag to your chest, you disembarked the train and tried to find a familiar face in the shifting sea of businessmen and students. You caught the unmistakable flash of goldenrod hoodie cross your line of sight. Raised on tiptoes you waved to the towering hero. When he caught sight of your slight frame lingering at the platform he flashed his all too famous Cheshire cat grin and began pushing his way through the crowd to meet you.

"Y/n! Ya made it!" Your feet left the ground the moment he wrapped his arms around you in an ecstatic embrace. The giggle that escaped you as he twirled you around could sustain him for decades if you permitted it. Dopily you grinned back at him and poked at his pillowy girth.

"It's been too long, Toyomitsu-kun."

His hold lingered a bit longer than it should have to be a friendly hug, but this was Toyomitsu Taishiro-- arguably the one person in all of Japan who knew you better than you knew yourself. Amber eyes alight with excitement, he pulled back and held out his arm for you to hold as he pushed through the crowd.

"A lot's changed since you've last been to Esuha City, y/n."

Your smile was soft; it was easy to get lost in the experience that was Toyomitsu and forget about the tedium of the world. He was sunshine personified and you were simply content to bask in his warmth.

"Show me."

He walked you through the vibrant restaurant district while you recounted the latest struggles and triumphs at work. Cautiously you avoided any mention of your string of failed dates and he generously obliged. Between grateful vendors stopping you along the way to get his seal of approval on their latest menu items, you both fell back into the comfortable rhythm of effortless give and take with your conversation. Esura welcomed you home with open arms with Taishiro by your side.

"Fatgum!!"

The two of you turned toward the voice as the vendor waved you over. The cart was exploding with all the colors spring had to offer.

"Lemme see what they want, Y/n. It'll only be a second." He offered a grin and withdrew his arm, leaving you to admire the Technicolor display. The soft jingle of the florist's door signaled his departure. Daisies, hydrangeas, lilies, and carnations weighed down the cart as other passersby paused to admire their beauty. Roses in every color littered half of the cart outside the storefront. The longer you lingered in front of them, the more your memories bubbled to the surface.

A boisterous laugh and peerless smile…

A promise made on the steps of Shiketsu…

A single yellow rose…

"Y/n, you okay?" Pulled from your reverie, you jumped at the sudden intrusion and held your chest to futility slow your racing heart. Toyomitsu held out his hand, holding out a single moon-pale gardenia. Your eyes darted from the flower to the matroshka-shaped man before you. "Here. It was on the house," he said with a chuckle. A gentle flush creeped across your cheeks as you took the flower. It's fragrance overwhelmed your senses and brought you back to another time uncomplicated by distance or duty.

"It's beautiful," you sighed, inhaling the heady perfume. For a moment, your companion looked relieved at your reception and took your hand in his.

"C'mon. There's a lot more of Esuha to show you!"

+++++

Exhausted, you checked into your hotel room. Toyomitsu arranged for you to stay in one close to his agency, boasting that it had the second best views of the canals and vibrant skyline at night second only to his own from his office. Your head buzzed with the day's events and your stomach felt comfortably full. You smiled at the thought-- warm and constant, he was always quick with a few honest, kind words. He always had a knack for giving you what you needed to refuel your soul.

The pale gardenia sat lonely in its makeshift green glass bottle vase. There was a time when your whole room was full of flowers. It was a hobby that started young, your grandmother handing down her love for traditional flower arranging to you during your school breaks. It was a hobby that wasn't lost on your childhood friend, but you didn't think he took as keen an interest in the art as you. In those days you and Toyomitsu were almost inseparable. Dinners with your parents weren't quite complete without his grin across the table from yours. By high school you had both been accepted to Shiketsu Academy, he in the hero course and you in support.

"I'll always be there. I'm gonna be your hero, Y/n! And that's a promise!"

Your eyes grew heavy with sleep. Nestled into the pillows, you turned over and succumbed.

Morning came too soon, bathing the room in pale, gray light. As you stretched your limbs and rubbed the sleep from your eyes, your phone chimed softly.

"Mornin', Y/n! Somethin' came up at work so I won't be able to hang out with ya until later."

Disappointment bled into your sleep-softened features. As if sensing your darkening mood, the BMI hero chuckled softly on the other end of the phone.

"Don't worry, Y/n. I'll make it up to ya. Promise."

"I'll hold you to it, Toyomitsu-kun. Be safe," you murmured. When the line went dead, you finally pulled yourself from the covers and padded over to the tiny hotel coffee pot. A soft knock came at the door, pulling your attention from your brew. The next knocks came heavier, almost impatient as you pulled a hoodie over your pajamas. The knocking didn't cease until you finally opened the door. Two younger men greeted you, one dressed in what looked like a school uniform with spiked red hair and the other in a silvery hooded cape obscuring dark blue hair and a perpetual nervous frown.

"G-good morning, Miss."

"Good morning. I take it Toyomitsu-kun sent you two to look after me today?"

The boys nodded in unison. You opened the door slightly more to invite them into your hotel room, finally taking note of the bouquet of bright yellow jonquils held protectively by the red-head. They stood awkwardly in the foyer as you pulled a simple white fitted tee and jeans out from your weekender bag to change. Once dressed, you poured yourself a small cup of coffee. The redhead smiled brightly, his sharp teeth gleaming in the morning light, and held out the bouquet.

"Boss wanted you to have these!" His smile was infectious-- it made sense why he was picked up by the agency to be an intern.

"Thank you--"

"Kirishima! And this here is Amajiki!"

You took a sip of your coffee and grinned. "I'm Y/n. It's a pleasure to meet you." Your face fell slightly when they heard your name.

"Y/n? As in the Y/n from the Tokyo branch of Shield Tech?" You nodded dumbly and blinked owlishly as the two exchanged looks. "Amajiki, we should take her back to the agency!" Amajiki looked like he might puke.

"Kirishima, I don't think Miss Y/n wants to spend her time off in another agency's support department."

"I wouldn't mind, actually." Your eyes lingered on the jonquils resting on your bed. Perhaps spending the day at Fatgum Agency would give you a chance to see him again. Amajiki scooped up the bouquet and placed it in a coffee cup with water, all the while mumbling something about not wanting the bright yellow blooms to be wilted by the time you got back. Kirishima picked up your purse and laptop bag while you pulled your hair back. You lingered on the bouquet and the lone gardenia beside it before the younger boys ushered you from your room.

Return my sweet affections, hm? Still as attentive as ever, Taishiro.

You walked between the two heroes like a rose between thorns. Both towered over your slight frame by half a head as they escorted you the two blocks from the hotel to the hero agency. Amajiki lowered his hood upon entering the building and waved timidly at the receptionist. Kirishima beamed at her and dashed for the locker rooms.

"I'll catch up, guys! Gotta change. Don't wait up!" Carrying your bags, you jogged to Amajiki's side. With a soft smile, you fidgeted with your bag strap.

"Shall we, Suneater?" At the mention of his hero name, the elf-eared boy brightened slightly. He led you down corridors until you reached a plain metal door.

"It's not much, but it's ours," he muttered. You patted his shoulder and took a quick look around the cramped room. "It's nothing compared to what you're used to in Tokyo, I'm sure." You gave a non-committal shrug and hummed as you unpacked your laptop.

"It's homey. Much cozier than work," you sighed, plugging into an unoccupied outlet. "Is there anything needing any immediate repairs?" Amajiki shook his dark head and took a seat across the workbench from you, his dark eyes boring into you as if he made it his mission to solve the mystery of you. "Reminds me of my old workshop, all tools and tiny spaces," you hummed. As your laptop booted up, you gave your limbs a quick stretch and glanced around the room.

Of course you'd still have it, you old softie…

Off in its own corner sat a dusty old steel workbench with bright orange and sunny yellow sunflowers painted on the side. You gravitated to the neglected space under Amajiki's watchful eye. The moment you touched the steel, it hummed to life under your hands, brightening like new.

"H-how is it you know Fatgum..?"

"Hm? Oh, we've known each other for ages. We just seem to keep skating around each other." Your hands fussed over a long-neglected project-- power gloves for a former sidekick you assumed. You smiled wryly at the craftsmanship, carefully appraising where the design succeeded. Satisfied, you turned to the tool chest and began pulling out your tiny screwdriver and soldering kit. "I feel like you have another question, Amajiki. Go ahead and ask."

"N-no, miss."

"Hm...suit yourself," you hummed, tracing uncovered wires from the glove's generator. Slipping it on over your own hand, you turned it and flexed your fingers to get the feel for the device. The minor adjustments you made as you flexed. Tongue jutting out just between your lips, you could feel a second set of eyes on you. You grinned and adjusted a few connections, the support device blinking back to life.

"What are you two doing here? Y/n, I thought you'd be seeing the sights!" You turned and your mouth hung open at the sight-- it had been years since you've last seen Taishiro when he wasn't his usual doughy self. He was always tall with sharp eyes and strong arms, but when he was "low fat" he was hard muscle and broad shoulders. His soft blonde hair stuck out in little spikes, his hoodie hung half-open, and left you feeling like the room was ten degrees too hot. Amajiki muttered something about needing to find his kohai and excused himself from the room, leaving you alone with your friend.

"You kept it after all these years?"

He sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck and grinned.

"Yeah, it made sense at the time. Y'know, when we opened I hoped you'd be here to really help me make a difference."

You couldn't meet his gaze but you could feel him bore holes through you with his golden stare. His massive, muscular frame siddled into the workshop and sat across your workbench, arm outstretched with a groping hand searching for yours to hold.

"Ya can always come home, Y/n."

It was your turn to smile. You left your crafts project at your old workbench and looked up at him through your lashes. He was close enough to touch, but oceans of emotional baggage served as the only distance between you.

"If only it were that easy, Toyomitsu-kun." Your voice was soft, somber as he reached across the divide and squeezed your hand. "I've got a life in Tokyo, y'know?" His face fell and those warm honey eyes implored you to reconsider. It was deja vu, him reaching over your tool bench in your parents' garage begging you to open an agency with him, you lamenting over your latest design being poached by a bigger, flashier support firm.

"...maybe this was a mistake…" you whispered, pulling your hand from his. You couldn't face him and the hurt that threatened to leech into his warm, familiar face. He rose and stood in front of you, broad hands on your shoulders, and knelt down to catch your eyes.

"Ya don't mean that. I know ya don't. I'm not sayin' drop everythin', Y/n. I'm sayin' you can always come home...to me." His voice grew so soft at the end you almost didn't hear him finish. Your eyes grew wide and darted away from him as he held your chin between his thumb and forefinger. The fluttering in your stomach, that same feeling you didn't think you could feel after you left for Tokyo the first time plagued you full force under his hold. For the first time in your life it finally dawned on you-- Taishiro made you feel small and precious, something worth keeping safe from the world. Rose dusted your cheeks as he drew closer, his breath fanning over your face. With eyes closed and an open heart he gently pressed his lips against yours, the sweetness from his kiss rivaling any dessert. It stole your breath with it's brevity and left you searching for more. His hold on your chin kept you from chasing his lips when he pulled away.

Dazed, you fluttered your eyelashes and exhaled slowly. "T-taishiro," you sighed. It was his turn to blush as he released your chin and rested his forehead against yours.

"I've waited a long time to hear ya call my name like that, Y/n."

Once again the rest of the world melted away, leaving just the two of you in your tiny corner of the universe. You could taste him on your tongue, his scent brought you back to graduation when you left him with a confession of your own. You must have hung there together, rapt in each other's presence because a certain energetic redhead stumbled upon you two and broke the spell that held you.

"Hey, boss, don't we have patrol to finish today?"

You closed your eyes and shook your head with a small, terse smile. You pulled away first and turned to your laptop, waving the bemused hero away.

"Go, Taishiro. Make it up to me later, okay?" Reluctantly pulled from your presence, you threw a bag of shrimp chips at him and sent him from the workshop, Kirishima in tow. The moment his name left your lips he beamed, almost blinding you with it's radiance.

"Ya won't regret it!"

+++++

Six months later, you were sitting comfortably on the train back to Esuha, landscape blurring behind like it was haphazardly painted by an impressionist. Your laptop bag was joined by a soft golden gift bag, its contents hidden by bolts of ombre teal and sky blue tissue paper. By the time you reached the station, excitement had you tingling from your fingertips down to your toes. Work kept you busy as Shield Tech continued to push your designs through R&D. Between showcasing your work at the Tokyo Hero Expo and Taishiro's role in the Shie Hassakai investigation, the most you two could do was the occasional video chat and text messages. As the train pulled into the station you could barely contain your excitement. You pulled out your phone and felt bolstered by the headlines your co-workers forwarded to you.

You navigated your way along the brightly colored storefronts and restaurants, stopping by one particularly old food cart that Taishiro boasted had the best takoyaki in the region. You picked up a box and made your way to the agency, hoping to surprise your hero. The closer to the building your drew, the harder the butterflies in your stomach fluttered.

"Ah, is Fatgum around?"

The receptionist at the desk blinked owlishly at you and her brow creased with confusion. "No, he's not here. You didn't hear?"

You shook your head and worried your lower lip between your teeth. "I'm not from around here. I was hoping to see him." The fluttering in your stomach twisted from excitement to dread with every stroke of the receptionist's pen. She handed you a slip of paper with an address and a room number.

"Here."

Without another word you ran from the agency and called him. "Please pick up. Please pick up!" The line rang and rang until his goofy, warm voice resonated over the speaker.

"Sorry I can't answer. Leave a message and I'll get back to ya!"

Cold dread gripped your stomach and tied it in uncomfortable knots. You found yourself tracing through every text message, every email, struggling to grasp at any clue as to why he would be able to answer. He always answered your calls by the second ring, even on patrol. You searched the address his receptionist handed to you and your dread turned into something darker, more primal than simple fear-- it was a hospital.

Without another thought you hailed a cab and piled on with your bags. He had to be okay. You both were working so hard to make it work despite the distance. He ensured you always had fresh flowers delivered to your workshop every week, each one indicative of his affections or describing an attribute you had that he admired deeply. With blushing hydrangeas, scarlet chrysanthemums, and ivory pale lilac, each week he showed how he cared, how he valued your perpetual presence in his life. Somehow you felt like you always came up short-- he knew your love language and spoke it naturally like he had been doing it since birth, but you couldn't quite figure out how to return his affections to match that ardence.

You paid the cab driver well and steeled your nerves as you slowly trudged through the hospital entrance. "Excuse me. Could you help me, please? I'm trying to find..."

Numbness leeched into your limbs when you reached his room. You hesitated to open the door, but when you did you found him sound asleep. Bloodstained bandages wrapped around his torso and left you clutching your own sides as if the wound were inflicted on you instead. He looked so tired, spent from the fight as his chest rose and fell rhythmically under the crisp hospital sheets. You glanced around the room and set your belongings down next to the recliner, quietly sitting beside him.

You must have sat with him for hours just watching him sleep. Did he always look this rugged? The curve of his jaw set against the pillows left you pondering if he kept his squishier form up just so he had an ace in the hole against villains and criminals or if it was something he saved just for you. The nurses paid little attention to you, only offering to bring back a spare pillow for you to stay by his side as he recovered.

You snuck down for a moment to buy a cup of coffee and noted a flower cart in the foyer. Immediately you thought of your hero in his bed and the stark white and gray walls that closed in on him. In that moment you knew.

When he finally woke, he sat amazed-- you curled up asleep in the recliner, laptop screensaver playing a loop of candid photos from your shared childhood on the bedside table next to a box of his favored, cold takoyaki and a pale yellow gift bag. Along his counters sat vase after vase of impossible to ignore sunflowers. He stared at the canary yellow flowers and chuckled. Reaching for a cold deep-fried morsel, he heard you moan in your sleep and watched as you shifted in the chair.

Once you settled, he turned his attention to the gift bag, carefully rustling through the layers of tissue paper as quietly as he could manage. A soft smile crept over his face as he unwrapped his gift. He beamed at the three-tier lunch box you brought him-- a treasure box full of his favorite bento snacks all carefully and lovingly made by you with him in mind. Salmon roe onigiri, various temaki sushi, furikake rice on one end and umeboshi rice on the other, tempura shrimp and yams with his favorite inagi sauce sat before him, and all he could do was devour it with his eyes. A small card fell out of the bento box wrapping and into his lap. His large hands unfolded the cardstock, his attention drawn from your slowly waking body.

"Home is where you are, hero. -- Y/n"

Stunned, he sat holding the card, rereading it over and over until you made another soft moan, this time your eyes met his.

"Hey," you yawned. "I see you opened your gift without me." He pushed the table aside and scooped you into his arms, wincing into your hair as he did. "Careful, big guy. You're already hurt." You grinned at him and nuzzled into the familiar warmth of his skin. Taishiro planted his lips against the crown of your head and held you so tightly you thought you'd lose the ability to breathe. Your breathing eventually did sync with his and you both relaxed into the comfortable banter that carried you two through the years.

"Sunflowers, huh?" He grinned.

"I mean it, Taishiro. I'm ready for that next step whenever you are."

"Y/n, I've been ready for ya for a long time."

XXXXXXX

#bnharem #sfw collab #fatgum #fatgum x reader #fluff #mha x reader #mha fatgum #bnha x reader #toyomitsu x reader #taishiro toyomitsu

338 notes · View notes

ahgaseda · 5 years ago

Text

enough | five

even if everyone else leaves me, you’re enough for me, you’re my only one, stand by me forever, only you, just you...

summary : to survive as a single woman in the big city, you resort to letting rich men pay for your company, but never anticipated that your first client would be the boy you once loved, Jinyoung.

warnings : strong profanity, explicit dialogue, references to prostitution, mentions of gang activity, graphic sexual content, potentially triggering elements involving mental health, panic attacks, etc.

miniseries chapters : one / two / three / four / five / six / seven

Something stirred you awake in the middle of the night; an unsettled feeling in the well of your stomach. Perhaps your body was so accustomed to the feeling of his skin against yours that it noticed immediately when the warmth of him was gone.

Opening your eyes, you turned, surprised to see Jinyoung no longer peacefully asleep beside you, but sitting on the edge of the bed and gazing toward the windows.

The lights had lost their luster. Even Seoul was deep in slumber at this ungodly hour.

“Jinyoung,” you called confusedly, dazed with sleep.

“Go back to bed,” he replied a little too sharply.

For a moment, you paused, studying the expanse of his shoulders. Something weighed them down. Something he couldn’t carry without being crushed from the inside.

Obstinate as ever, you crawled forward, slipping behind him and wrapping your arms and legs around his body. Jinyoung sighed, lips tugging into a reluctant smile, and stroked a hand across your arm to lace his fingers through yours.

Resting your cheek on his shoulder, you asked, “What’s wrong, baby?”

He exhaled loudly through his nose. The lines of his brow were furrowed in pensive thought; of losing everything. Of losing you.

“I have a lot on my mind,” Jinyoung finally answered, foolish to think that answer would suffice.

You rolled your eyes and teased, “What else is new?”

Jinyoung wrinkled his nose and squeezed your hand even tighter. Jiwon’s threat was very real and manifested in his mind with every bloody, gruesome possibility. Jinyoung knew he had to put him away for good. No hesitation and no mercy.

Seeing he had fallen back into his reveries, you traced your fingers over his abs through the thin white shirt. Bringing your lips to his neck, you left a few tender kisses before flicking out your tongue to test his mood.

Jinyoung felt his pulse pick up speed. It went without saying he would love to bury himself between your legs and forget about everything except you and him in his bed. But that was never what he was made of. He couldn’t indulge in your body when you were at risk and only he could make it right.

And, of course, he was still mad as hell at you.

Jinyoung turned to meet your eyes and for a fleeting moment, you naively believed you would get your way. He kissed the corner of your mouth chastely before gathering you in his arms and returning you to your place in bed.

Draping an arm over your waist and laying his head on your chest, Jinyoung whispered, “Sleep, baby. I’m right here.”

Satisfied that he wouldn’t leave you, you settled comfortably into the mattress. His weight on top of you was more than welcome. “Will you ever tell me what goes on in that head of yours?” you asked, delicately tracing your fingertips over his forehead and pushing away his fluffy hair.

Jinyoung took your hand in his and brought it to his mouth, placing featherlight kisses over each of your fingers. “You,” he confessed in a heavy sigh, as if it pained him to admit it. “Always you.”

Your eyes burned with emotion and you didn’t hesitate to tell him, “I love you, Jinyoung.”

“I know,” he replied without missing a beat.

You chuckled. It was worth a try to make him say it back after all this time, but he was nothing if not stubborn and hard-headed.

The morning came late and your growling stomach woke you with a vengeance. When you stirred, you were amazed to find Jinyoung already awake, but still clinging snugly to your body.

“I’m hungry,” you whined tiredly, rubbing at your eyes with a fist.

Jinyoung rose quickly and proceeded to sift you out from beneath the warmth of the blankets. “It’s about time. Get up, lazy,” he jeered, half-serious. “I’m starving. We’re going to eat.”

You gawked at his outburst. “Have you been waiting this whole time for me to wake up?”

“Yes,” he said with a frown.

You wanted to laugh. He was such a big baby. “I have to study,” you told him, slipping off the bed and gathering your clothes.

Jinyoung put his hands on his hips and chided, “You studied your brains out yesterday. It’s Saturday. Today, you rest.”

You stopped, blinking incredulously at how bossy he sounded. “Well, damn,” you said with a chuckle. “Guess I have no choice, huh?”

“None. Zero,” Jinyoung replied, heading out the door to give you privacy. “Get dressed.”

“Fine,” you shot back, attempting to sound annoyed simply to toy with him.

That was when you remembered you didn’t have any clothes to wear. You had been brought to his penthouse in your pajamas and you highly doubted Jinyoung would appreciate taking you to breakfast in your thigh-high socks.

There was a swift tapping of knuckles on the door followed by it opening before you could finish calling, “Yes?”

Jinyoung appeared again, a bag in each hand. “Right on time,” he announced, disgruntled. “I had some clothes ordered for you. The boys just dropped them off.”

“Jinyoung, you can’t be serious,” you exclaimed, racing over to see the spoils. “Please tell me you didn’t spend a fortune on these.”

Jinyoung snorted and narrowed his eyes at you. He was tempted to pull out a wad of cash and set it on fire before you just to prove a point. “I spend my money however I want. Now, for the love of food, hurry up and put something on. Or I’ll just eat you.”

Memories began to flood of the night before and you licked your lips. “I would not be opposed to that.”

Jinyoung lifted his brows. After a pause, he retorted, “Nope. I got nothing. All I’m thinking about is beef.”

“Me, too,” you shot back, glancing down at his pants.

He promptly folded his arms and made that damned adorable face. Pursed lips, puffed cheeks. “Wow, I ate her out one time and she can’t think straight. Woman, am I gonna be able to take you out in public ever again?”

You laughed aloud. “Yes, yes, I’m coming. I just miss the hell out of teasing you.”

“Yeah, well, I miss having a full belly,” he groaned. “You have five minutes or I’m leaving your horny ass here.”

“Cheese and rice,” you grumbled, pulling the shirt over your head and stripping down to your underwear.

Jinyoung was about to make a quip about how badly he craved rice, but was distracted at the sight of your breasts. Your body had filled out in his absence over the last four years. Though you were always perfect to him, he didn’t mind your bigger boobs and fuller hips.

You met his eyes, quirking a brow. Suddenly aware of the sexual tension that had filled the room in the span of a second, part of you hoped he would pounce on you then and there.

Jinyoung watched, feigning disinterest, and handed you one of the blouses.

By the time you arrived at the restaurant, bodyguards and driver in tow, Jinyoung was in full hungry brat mode. The owner recognized him at once and bowed deeply, ushering the two of you to the secluded table in the back corner. Before you slipped into your seat, you watched Jackson, Jaebeom and Yugyeom take a high table just beyond and strategically within eyesight at all times.

Not much passed in terms of conversation at first. Jinyoung was wholly focused on food. When the beef began to sizzle on the grill, you reached for the tongs and earned a swift slap to your hand.

“What was that for?” you exclaimed irritably.

Jinyoung proceeded to flip the beef and complained, “You have no grill skills. You burn everything.”

“I do not,” you said with a pout.

The servers continued to bring food at Jinyoung’s behest. By the time they had finished, there was no free space on the table.

The sight made your eyes burn with the threat of tears, even worse when Jinyoung took a large mouthful and made a satisfied sound in his chest.

There were days he gave you his food and went hungry himself. Jinyoung always suffered if it meant you were taken care of. The two of you went years without ever knowing how it felt to be full.

Jinyoung glanced at you, perturbed at how you had yet to start eating. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

You shook your head and lied, “Nothing.”

He watched you pick up the chopsticks and your hesitation was painfully obvious. He could see the moisture in your eyes. Jinyoung knew in that moment what had made you emotional and chose kindly not to press you on it, but he did say, “Let it go, baby.”

“What?” you questioned.

“Whatever you’re about to cry over.”

You blinked rapidly, fighting the tears even harder, and nodded your head. Then, you reached for the food.

The waitress came over not long after and asked if there was anything else either of you needed.

Jinyoung looked to you for an answer. “Want more food?”

Given how much you had already eaten, you patted your stomach and quipped, “No, I’m watching my figure.”

The joke was lost on your lover. Jinyoung scoffed in annoyance and told her, “Two lunch boxes please.”

You chuckled.

Jinyoung took another bite and asked, “You still love dosirak, right?”

Your mouth watered. “Obviously.”

“Then, eat a damn lunch box.”

The server came back with two tins and Jinyoung had barely taken it from her hand when he began shaking it. You mirrored him, recalling all the times as kids you would compete to see who could shake theirs the longest.

After the two of you ate to your heart’s content, you were in disbelief - but mostly thrilled - when Jinyoung returned with you to the penthouse and revealed he would be working from home for the day. Your lips spread into a grin and he quickly rebuffed your affections.

“It’s not that I want to spend time with you,” he calmly argued. “I just don’t feel like dealing with people today.”

You winked. “Of course.”

Jinyoung plopped down on the couch and opened the newspaper, reading through every section as he always did. You sat on the neighboring couch opposite of him and your gaze fell to his muscly thighs spread out, hugged by the tightly fitting jeans. His lap did look rather inviting.

You went into the kitchen and fixed a cup of tea. Offering to make him one as well, Jinyoung politely declined and you were content to lean against the counter and study him.

Very, very often you had imagined and daydreamed of domestic life with Jinyoung as a wild, restless teenager. And now, here it was. Although, Jinyoung had frequently joked that he would never be able to tame you, no matter how much you loved him.

That wasn’t true. The truth was, he had broken you a long time ago.

“I can feel you staring,” Jinyoung called from behind the newspaper.

You murmured coyly, “I’m enjoying the view,” and put the cup of tea to your lips.

Jinyoung flushed a subtle shade of crimson, pulling his paper close to hide it.

You approached him and asked, “Mind if I sit down?”

“Go right ahead,” Jinyoung replied, patting the empty space next to him.

You smiled and turned around, sidling backwards and landing squarely on his lap.

Jinyoung let out a tiny grunt the moment you sat on his hips and scowled back at you when you glanced over your shoulder to peer innocently in his direction.

“What are you playing at?” he barked, folding his newspaper.

“You started this game,” you sang innocently. “Don’t hate me for finishing it.”

Jinyoung cocked a brow and refused to surrender. “Is that so?”

“Mm-hm.”

“Well then,” was all Jinyoung said before grasping you none too gently and smashing his lips on yours.

You were completely at his mercy with your precarious position on his lap. Jinyoung quickly barred an arm across your stomach and cradled your face with the other. You reached back to tangle your fingers in his hair, deepening the kiss. Jinyoung slipped you his tongue and you moaned softly into his mouth when a hand landed on your breast.

“Tell me what you’re thinking,” Jinyoung whispered darkly in your ear, kissing hotly over your racing pulse. “Don’t leave out a single detail.”

There were times you wondered if he could read your mind. Glancing down to see his hands kneading your clothed breasts, you let your head fall back when he pressed slow kisses to your neck. “When you used to…,” you trailed, voice trembling. “Take me from behind.”

Jinyoung chuckled softly, grazing his teeth over your skin. “Yeah,” he growled even lower. “You always did look good on your hands and knees.”

You swallowed, heart thundering wildly. He must have heard it. You watched his hands drift down your body, slipping beneath your shirt before returning to palm your breasts.

“You were always so deep,” you panted with want and need. “I almost couldn’t take it.”

Jinyoung tucked his hands inside your bra, finally able to tease your nipples without anything in the way. “And you were always so tight,” he retorted. “No matter how hard I fucked you.”

You turned your head, nuzzling your nose against his. “Please, just take me,” you whimpered, trying to mold your lips to his.

Jinyoung rose, prying you from his lap and leaving you on the couch. “The only thing I’m taking is a cold shower,” he said, stomping toward the bedroom.

“You little shit,” you called after him, bracing your hands on the top of the sofa. “I can’t stand your stubborn ass!”

“You love this ass,” he bantered back at you. “And it’s a fantastic ass. Have some respect.”

You made a sound somewhere between a laugh and a scoff, and sulked when he locked the bedroom door behind him.

The rest of the weekend was less profanity filled. Jinyoung gave you a taste of your dreams of domestic life with him. Quiet dinners. Endless food. The scent of fresh coffee filling the room in the morning. Peaceful evenings under a shared blanket in the reading nook.

Jinyoung gushed excitedly when he told you what was happening in the novel he devoured. You soaked up every word, overjoyed to see him happy. Occasionally he would remember he was mad at you and would be sparing with his affection. Then, he would seem to forget again and couldn’t keep his hands off of you.

It was a constant game of push and pull. One that you came to enjoy.

But on Sunday night he grew restless, tossing and turning. You had no sooner finally fallen asleep when Jinyoung woke you screaming, thrashing in the bed.

Every image of his night terrors from years before hit you all at once and your body responded as if muscle memory took control. “Jinyoung, stop! It’s okay,” you tried to console him, grasping his face in your hands and staring into his wide, terrified eyes. “I’m here. It’s me!”

Jinyoung was stronger than you by leaps and bounds. He pried you off of him with effortless ease and staggered toward the window, pounding his fist against it in frustration. He ran his hands through his hair, desperately clawing for his composure. The thing he guarded so vehemently. “You’re not supposed to see me like this…,” he choked out.

That damn pride, you thought with a frown as fire filled your cheeks. “And who is, huh?” you snapped angrily.

He clocked a weathered glance at you and warned, “Don’t.”

“Jinyoung…”

Jinyoung was thinking of his nightmares. Of you ripped violently away from him. They blended into the bloody, malicious things he had seen. The things he had done to take his place at the top. He heard Jiwon’s threat to break you in before his eyes.

He guarded his heart; guarded it with an iron fucking fist. He protected himself with ice and steel. He had to in order to live with what he had done. You were always how he justified it. He did it all for you, but he had sacrificed so much of himself.

“I can’t let you in again,” Jinyoung whispered shakily. “You’ll be gone and I won’t survive.”

Your knees buckled. Your heart collapsed somewhere in your chest. “I’m so sorry,” you whimpered, face tensing with oncoming tears.

Jinyoung lowered his head, hiding behind his disheveled hair. The first time you left him it was your choice. If you left him again, it wouldn’t be by choice. It would be because someone stole you away.

“You make me crazy,” Jinyoung murmured, reaching for you and gathering you to his chest. His hands raked into your hair, keeping you looking up into his eyes. “I wanted to hate you. I tried. You ruined me.”

Tears freely streamed down your cheeks. Jinyoung and you, you and Jinyoung - two wounded souls just trying to heal. “I’ll never leave you again,” you vowed with all you had. “I swear on my life. I’ll die before I do that to you.”

“I know,” Jinyoung sighed.

That was exactly what he feared.

You looked at him with confusion, waiting for an explanation. You were given none and Jinyoung refused to return to bed. He sat by the window, waiting for the city to wake and watching over you.

The next morning, you opened your eyes to find Jinyoung was gone. And you weren’t surprised.

Yugyeom took you back to the condo and you stared at your phone all the while. No calls. No texts. Your blood began to boil.

You typed a message to send him, You can’t build those walls when I’m around, huh?

But you didn’t have the heart to send it. Not when the sound of his screams echoed in your ears. Deleting the words, you tossed your phone on the nightstand and buried yourself in studying. Exams were in full swing this week. It was time to get to work.

For three days you heard nothing from Jinyoung. For three days he avoided you. You felt wounded and your heart was sore.

When Yugyeom and Jackson arrived to take you to your exam, you asked nonchalantly, “Jackson, you’ll be seeing Jinyoung later, right?”

“Yes, mam.”

You hopped into the car and put on your seatbelt. “Do me a favor and please mention in passing that I stand by what I said. I’ll never leave him. But a woman needs an outlet to let off steam and reward her hard work, and if he does not want to provide that outlet, the club will.”

“With pleasure,” Jackson said with a chuckle.

Yugyeom grinned mischievously.

It was early afternoon when your exam had finished and you excitedly jumped into the tinted Range Rover.

“Well?” asked Yugyeom eagerly, hand draped on the wheel.

Jackson turned around from his spot in the passenger seat. “How was it?”

You flashed them a smile and announced, “I slayed that shit.”

The two boys applauded.

“The evil physics has been defeated,” Yugyeom sang, putting the car in drive and cruising out of the parking lot.

A moment later, Jackson crooned, “Mr. Park would like to extend an invitation for you to join him at his office immediately if you are still in need of… an outlet.”

That had your attention. “Oh?”

Jackson nodded, amused. “He says he will be happy to take you out to dinner as soon as he is finished working, but you may join him in his office until then.”

You rolled your eyes and huffed, “Just what a girl wants after spending two whole hours in an exam. To sit in an office and wait on her stubborn ass man.”

Yugyeom looked at you in the rearview mirror and said, “We don’t have to go.”

The gears turned in your head. Jackson smirked, noticing your expression full of mischief.

“Take me there, please,” you said, crossing your legs. “I think it’s time I got my revenge.”

The office was in an executive building on an inconspicuous corner. Jinyoung had to make sure each of his business endeavors looked legitimate by all means. You stepped into the ornate lobby and let the elevator take you to the third floor.

When you stepped into the office, Jinyoung looked up, but didn’t move a muscle. “Since when do you go to the club?” he asked gruffly.

No greeting. He was still embarrassed over the other night, you mused to yourself. “Since freshman year,” you countered, moving to one of the two chairs before his desk and making yourself comfortable.

Jinyoung put his pen down and leaned back in his own chair, folding his arms tautly. “You can’t handle your liquor,” he said bluntly.

You nodded in agreement. “I know. Still the lightweight. But free booze. Free music. Free dancing.”

Jinyoung’s eyes flickered. There were images filling his mind of you dancing with men, men that didn’t hesitate to let their hands roam your body. “Are you trying to make me jealous?” he asked.

You grinned. “Absolutely. How am I doing?”

Jinyoung scowled and didn’t dare gratify you with an answer. Instead he shifted subjects. “How was your exam?”

“I fucking nailed it.”

Jinyoung chuckled.

“I did, Jinyoung,” you insisted, beaming with pride. “I crushed it.”

He bobbed his head. “I believe you. I’m very proud.”

You gave him a soft smile.

Finally Jinyoung rose from his desk and moved to the nearby table, pulling a bottle that had been on ice and pouring two glasses of champagne. “How should we celebrate?” He looked to you expectantly whilst handing you your glass. “I can get us a private booth at any of the restaurants or we can…”

“I know what I want,” you interjected, taking a sip of your drink.

Jinyoung shrugged. “Well, you have my credit card. Go buy it.”

You shook your head. “I don’t wanna buy anything.”

Jinyoung tilted his head and exhaled, running out of patience. “Woman, tell me what you want.”

“I want you.”

Jinyoung let a lull of silence pass before he hummed, “Mm.”

“Did you have a rough day?” you asked coyly, setting down your drink and running your fingers up his tie.

“Maybe,” he said, voice laden with exhaustion. “But you know I don’t talk about my work.”

You brushed past him intentionally and came to stand behind his desk, pushing a few things back to give yourself room. Then, you lifted yourself on top of it, sitting on the edge and spreading your legs, motioning him forward.

Jinyoung downed his drink and discarded the glass, then sneered, “I’m not going to fuck you. Not yet anyway.”

“I know that,” you replied sharply. “Just come here and turn around.”

His brow furrowed, bemused as to what you were after, but Jinyoung relented and stepped between your knees, pecking a kiss on your irresistible lips. You smiled against his mouth and grabbed his arms, steering him to put his back to you.

Once he had, you settled your hands on his shoulders and began to knead, massaging his tense muscles and feeling him relax under your ministrations. A soft hum of a moan left his lips and you smirked in satisfaction, putting more pressure on his back until he sighed in relief.

Lulling Jinyoung into the headspace you wanted, your hands fell deliberately down his burly arms, still squeezing his muscles to release their tension. Slowly, you skimmed your palms to his stomach, grabbing his shirt and yanking upward, freeing the material from where it had been tucked into his pants.

“What are you doing?” asked Jinyoung lowly, voice sinking a few octaves.

Nipping the shell of his ear, you whispered, “Let me play.”

Jinyoung shivered as you began to kiss his neck and you were quick to loop your legs over his thick thighs, dissuading him from trying to escape your touches. With his shirt loose, you brushed the hem aside and fiddled at his belt.

Sliding your hand into his pants, you resisted the urge to giggle at his hardening length, but you did tease, “I’ve barely touched you and look how hard you’re getting, baby.”

“I started getting hard the second you spread your legs on top of my desk,” he confessed in a raspy snarl, staring down at the erotic sight of your hand down his jeans and your legs locked around his thighs.

You chuckled devilishly in his ear and pulled at his half-hard cock, stroking the length of him in your tightly gripped fist. Bringing a hand to your mouth quickly, you licked the span of your palm before reaching down to pump his shaft.

Jinyoung tensed against you when you focused on the head of his member, even more so when you sucked intently on his neck. Your breath was hot, making the sweat gathered at his hairline cool on his skin.

“Jinyoung,” you whispered pliantly, once he was rock hard in your grasp. “Please let me do this for you.”

His hips stuttered in tandem with your movements and so did his words, “Do what?”

You worked down his length with both hands, gathering a drop of precum with your finger and teasing his slit. You thought he would come undone and unravel in your hands at any minute with the way his breaths were tumbling out.

“Make you feel good,” you purred.

Jinyoung shivered at the thought. His attention was still fixated downward, where your hands had vanished inside his pants. You were jerking his cock faster and faster, like you were trying to get him off embarrassingly quick just so you could tease him for it later.

Which wasn’t far from the truth.

Suddenly, you gripped the base of his cock nice and hard, and stopped all motions. “Well…,” you growled with impatience. “Do I have your permission?”

Jinyoung exhaled in defeat, his hips moving of their own accord in a seeking thrust, desperate for friction. “Do what you want with me,” he mumbled, kicking himself for losing resolve so quickly. “I won’t stop you. Not today.”

You fought a giddy smile at finally getting your way and withdrew your hands from down his pants, pushing him forward to allow you room to slide from the desk. The moment your feet touched the floor, you twirled around him, switching positions, and pushed him up against the desk.

Jinyoung didn’t struggle, but he did grab the edge of the desk and hold tightly with both hands, breath bated.

Pressing your hands to his chest, you leaned forward and captured his lips in a kiss, teased his tongue as he sighed into your mouth. Jinyoung was enraptured to say the least, clutching your waist gingerly and pulling you close enough that your breasts pushed against him.

As you kissed him, you rubbed your fingers over his clothed nipples, his cock twitching eagerly in his pants. Then, you took a tie from your wrist and affixed it to your hair, tightening the ponytail into position and pressing one last kiss on his lips.

You shoved Jinyoung against the desk once more, to remind him who was in charge until further notice and your eyes lit up at the blush across his cheeks and the fire in his gaze.

Jinyoung couldn’t believe his eyes when you dropped to your knees before him, grabbing his pants and boxers and tugging them down to his ankles in one sweep. His hard cock waited before your eyes, weeping and curving toward his abs.

Your fingers danced up his shaft, eyes on the vein bulging underneath. You liked teasing him, loved making him beg for release even more, but today you were in the mood to make short work of him. You were still bitter at being ignored for three days. You got a hold of him in your hand and licked a wet stripe from base to tip before meeting his gaze again.

Jinyoung clawed at his tie, loosening it frantically so he could breathe. The last time someone blew him would have been four years ago. You used to suck him off rather often, enjoying the way you could reduce him to a moaning mess. Jinyoung hoped this time would be no different.

“Jinyoung,” you whispered, peering up at him with the tip of his cock against your lips.

“Yeah?” he panted.

“Don’t hold back,” you said, holding his cock firmly as you took him in your mouth.

Inch by inch you sucked him down, lilting back before engulfing him again to wet him with your saliva. Jinyoung watched you stroke back and forth, each time going deeper until his member hit the back of your throat. You choked at first, out of practice after so long, but the tightening of your throat made his hips arch and his abs flex.

Jinyoung whimpered your name and that was all you needed to keep going.

You let his girth leave your mouth with a lewd pop, proceeding to pump him in your fist while you peered up at him with tear-filled eyes.

Jinyoung had let his head fall back the moment you choked on him and was content to stay that way. He couldn’t look at you. One glance of you with your lips around the base of his cock would make him bust in a heartbeat. And god knows you would never let him live that down.

You slipped him between your lips again, sucking on the head and teasing with your tongue before grasping his hips. He had thrust ever so slightly, probably unintentionally, seeking the heat of your mouth. Your eyes burned with more tears when his length hit the back of your throat again, but you swallowed him eagerly. Jinyoung inhaled a hard breath and fisted his hand in your hair.

Your warm, wet mouth was too much. It took all of Jinyoung’s willpower not to fill your mouth with cum. He couldn’t stop thinking about the vice-like grip of your pussy, how it was undoubtedly throbbing with need. He pictured you in his mind, moaning his name when he finally penetrated you.

“Yeah…,” Jinyoung growled, sucking another breath through his teeth when you hollowed out your cheeks. “Like that. Good girl…”

You moaned at the lust in his voice, sending vibrations through his cock and smiling when a little groan left his lips. You rewarded the sound, swallowing around the tip of him again and bobbing your head a little faster on his length.

Jinyoung was in bliss - absolute, mind-numbing rapture. Head tilted back, eyes pressed closed. You smiled with his cock in your mouth, hands rooted to his tensing thighs, and stared up at him in worship, heady at the sight of his chest rising and falling with labored panting. His full lips were parted as pleasured sounds left him with every thrust in your waiting mouth.

“Fu…ck,” he moaned, now gripping your hair with both hands.

You looped your arms around his thighs and set your nails to his plump ass. He had taken over control and all you could do was hang on for the ride. Jinyoung pumped his cock into your mouth, rutting into the back of your throat. Tears streamed down your cheeks and the sound of you gagging only made him twitch more.

“Good girl,” Jinyoung rasped, losing his mind to the feel of you. “Almost there.”

Sucking him off was nothing short of gratifying. Your pussy throbbed between your legs and you could feel wet arousal soaking through your panties. His cock would slide into you smoother than silk if he wasn’t so damn stubborn. At the thought, you moaned around his length and he whimpered.

Jinyoung couldn’t fight back his moans any longer and you knew he was at his end. His hips stuttered, his thrusts turning erratic, and he finally came with a shaky cry that sounded vaguely like your name.

You lapped him up, gulping down his release when you tasted it on the back of your tongue and swallowing every last drop. Seeing the ecstasy on his face made you desperate for climax and you pressed your thighs together.

Jinyoung still gripped your hair tightly, knuckles almost white, and slowly pulled his spent cock from your mouth. Without warning, he grabbed your arms and hoisted you up none too gently. “Fuck,” was all he said.

You opened your mouth and wagged your tongue at him in a taunt, proving you had milked him dry.

Jinyoung shook his head at you before reaching down to pull up his pants, fastening them quickly to get you in his arms again. “God, you’re good,” he growled, grasping you by the throat.

You were gifted a searing kiss and purred in response. At this point, you were sure he would give you anything you asked for.

“So fucking good,” he hummed, pressing a wet open-mouthed kiss or two to your jaw.

“Jinyoung,” you beckoned sweetly, eyes rolling when his lips drifted to your neck.

“Hm?” he questioned, pulling back to look at you.

“I’m wet,” you confessed, raking your tongue across your teeth at the way his pupils flickered.

Jinyoung cocked his head, brushing his nose against yours. Without another word, his hand trailed down your body and pushed between your thighs, getting a taste of your desire for him and the arousal coating your folds.

“Fuck, baby,” he groaned. “You like choking on my dick that much?”

“Mm, yes. I do,” you retorted, nipping at his lips.

Jinyoung fisted his hand in your ponytail, his usual roughness coming through. “What should I do with you?”

“Fuck me,” you replied, rather blunt. “Think how easy you would slide right in.”

Jinyoung smiled, biting his lip. He was so enamored with you. You wanted exactly what you couldn’t have and it consumed you. “It does seem like a waste of good pussy, doesn’t it?” he teased, seeming to mull over the thought.

You nodded.

Jinyoung released you then and launched himself onto the desk, sitting where you had been before.

You stood rooted in place, watching him curiously.

Jinyoung motioned you forward and patted his leg. “Ride my thigh.”

You frowned and whined, “I want dick.”

He almost laughed. “I’m soft.”

“I can get you hard in no time,” you crooned, bracing your hands on his knees and stroking upwards. “We both know that.”

Jinyoung harshened his tone, no room for further argument. “My thigh or your own fingers. The choice is yours.”

You huffed petulantly and hiked your skirt up your waist, trudging over and mounting the desk. And him. Putting a leg on either side of his thigh, you sank down until your panty-covered folds met the rough fabric of his pants.

The first roll of your hips was tentative. Yet another thing you were more than a little rusty at. Jinyoung sensed your inhibition and looped an arm around your waist, clutching you flush against him.

Jinyoung tucked his face to the crook of your neck and whispered, “Get yourself off.”

Oh, you wanted to. Release was at the front of your mind, holding the reins to your sanity. The image of Jinyoung reaching climax still lingered and you swore there was no better sound in the world than his moaning of your name. You wanted to hear it again and again.

“Please,” you spoke almost inaudibly, feeling small and helpless in his lap. “I need it.”

Jinyoung guided your hips, steering you to rub back and forth on his thigh. “Mm, that’s it,” he encouraged, lapping at the sweat on your neck. “Ride me like you mean it.”

You gathered more confidence at his words, grinding yourself down on him a little harder until your clit ached at the contact. You held his shoulders for balance, biting your lip at the feeling of his broad hands roaming to cup your ass.

Jinyoung kneaded your thighs and hips before settling on your ass again, humming his appreciation for your beautiful body and how it belonged to him, only him. He whispered little nothings in your ear, dirty things that riled you up and made you pick up the pace.

You moaned softly, gushing at the stimulation.

“Once upon a time,” Jinyoung teased, nuzzling his face between your breasts. “You used to ride me like it was what you were made for.”

And you would love to do it again if he would just let you sink down on his cock and be done with it. “Jinyoung,” you began to warn sternly.

Smack!

His hand collided with your ass and you squeaked, hips falling out of rhythm before settling back into motion.

“Don’t stop,” Jinyoung ordered, intently patting the print he had just made on your flesh. “And don’t slow down.”

“I…,” you trailed, lost in too many sensations at once.

His fingers tightened in your hair and yanked your head to the side. You felt his tongue racing over your pulse before his soft lips pressed a wet kiss on your jaw.

“Tell me,” Jinyoung snarled, reeling his hand back and landing his palm on your ass again.

Smack!

You gasped and rode him even faster.

“What do you want from me?” he pressed calmly before you could answer.

“Harder. Harder,” you pleaded, clinging to his arms for dear life.

Jinyoung chuckled with twisted pleasure at your torment, spanking your ass three solid times back to back. Your hips sped up at the sting, chasing after your high like it was the key to your sanity.

“Come already, baby,” Jinyoung urged, his dialect thicker than ever. “You’re soaking my goddamn pants.”

That rebellious streak flared and you griped, “I would rather soak your goddamn cock.”

Jinyoung bit down on the base of your neck, his member twitching at that. “Such a little angel out there,” he taunted, cupping your face. “No one would believe what a slut you are for me.”

You howled his name for mercy.

Jinyoung grasped your hips and brought you down to meet his thigh, rough and merciless. The moment you told him you were close, he commanded, “Come for me.”

You let your head fall back and your lips parted in a silent scream. This was the release you craved, needed above all else. To finally feel satiated after the suffocating tension and longing. Your nails set viciously to his shoulders and your hips slowed at the intensity of orgasm. Your engorged clit was suddenly too sensitive for the abrasive contact. Your body instinctively bowed away, but Jinyoung landed a palm on your ass with a vengeance.

“Don’t you dare tap out,” he scolded, keeping his hand poised at the ready to land yet another hit.

You kept riding him, overstimulating yourself to the point your lower half shuddered involuntarily. Satisfied at the endless, tiny cries falling from your mouth, Jinyoung grabbed your ass and rubbed the mark he had made, soothing the sting.

“You’re done,” he murmured, pulling you into his arms.

You went slack, satisfied he could support your weight. You let your head rest on his shoulder, burying your face in his neck, and held him tightly. Your body continued to tremble with orgasm, settling through the last of the aftershocks. Breathing in utter relief, all you wanted in that moment was for Jinyoung to never let go of you.

He turned his head, trying to get a glimpse of your face, and asked, “Feel better?”

Finally, you roused yourself, lifting your eyes and looking everywhere but at him. “I made a mess,” you murmured bashfully.

Jinyoung studied you, noting how you avoided his gaze, and asked, “How many exams do you have left?”

You smiled at what he was implying. “Three.”

“I’m gonna need more pants.”

You laughed at that.

Jinyoung let his hands slip reluctantly from your hips as you clambered off of him and he watched you with nothing short of amusement while you pulled your skirt back down and adjusted your clothes.

“So, yeah,” you stammered, swallowing the lump in your throat. “I’m gonna head home and study.”

Jinyoung cocked his head. “Why are you being awkward?”

You were finally forced to look at him and lied, “I’m not.”

“You are,” he asserted. Jinyoung could smell bullshit a mile away, especially yours.

You shifted your weight.

“Was it… something I said?” he asked worriedly, jumping down from the desk and approaching you. “Did I hurt you?”

“No, it’s…,” you trailed, looking away. Your hunger had been soothed, but not your heartache.

Jinyoung cradled your face tenderly, eyes filled with concern. “Talk to me,” he whispered.

You pried his hands from you and snapped, “I can’t talk to you. You decide when I’m allowed to see you.”

Jinyoung sighed in realization. He knew the cold shoulder was too effective on you and regretted being as severe as he had been. But he couldn’t let you know the threat that you were under. Or the misery it inflicted on him.

“I’m sorry,” was all he said.

You dragged your feet toward him, falling back into his arms and tucking your head beneath his chin. Jinyoung was all too relieved to wrap his arms around you, kissing your brow with affection. For a moment, you were content to hug him. Then your mouth got in the way.

“I just want to be with you all the time. I’m crazy about you,” you rambled, brushing your lips over his own. “You make me absolutely out of my fucking mind crazy.”

Jinyoung studied you. Then, he cut the tension by smarting, “Stalker.”

You recoiled and snorted. “Asshat.”

Jinyoung flashed his teeth in a grin. “Dinner?"

“Ugh,” you grumbled. “Shower first.”

Jinyoung nodded, snickering. “Okay, okay. Go home and shower. Yugyeom will bring you to the restaurant. Deal?”

“Perfect,” you replied, turning on your heels and making for the door.

“Hey,” Jinyoung called out.

You turned.

“Where’s my damn kiss?”

Without hesitation, you ran back into his arms, colliding into his chest and nearly knocking the wind out of him. Jinyoung held you close and kissed you, tangling his fingers in your hair. The two of you giggled and smiled and kissed like a pair of hormone crazed teenagers with no clue what they were doing.

When you finally pulled away, Jinyoung watched you go and you swore you had never seen a more beautiful mess of a boy in your life.

No sooner had you stepped out of the shower did your phone ring. Clad in a towel, you answered eagerly, “Hey, Hoseok. It’s been a while. How are you?”

His voice was unnerving. “Seokjin wants to see you right away.”

“Oh,” was all you could manage, heart picking up speed. “Did he say why?”

“No, but he wants you in here right now. It sounds serious.”

This was new territory for you. Seokjin never summoned you with such a manner. You reckoned you were in trouble or at least, someone was in trouble. “I see. Okay. I’m coming. I will be there as soon as I can.”

Yugyeom put the key in the ignition and revved the engine. One look at your face and his smile fell. “What’s wrong?”

You closed the door behind you and fastened your seatbelt, answering, “We need to make a stop first.”

The sun set as Yugyeom drove to your employer’s building. You hadn’t been back since the contract was established between you and Jinyoung. Obviously, you were no longer available to serve as eye candy for wealthy men. It had been strange being able to focus on school without making routine trips to see Seokjin for jobs.

You turned the corner and entered the office, seeing Seokjin standing behind his desk with his hands on his hips. “Hey, boss. I…,” you began.

Seokjin laid eyes on you and snapped, “Did you think I wouldn’t find out?”

You watched him stomp toward you and questioned carefully, “What do you mean?”

“That your client is your ex-boyfriend,” he roared.

Your eyes were wide. “Oh. That.”

Seokjin folded his arms, narrowing his eyes at you in disappointment, but he softened his tone. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

It went without saying that you had dealt with many bad, dangerous men in your life. Seokjin was not one of them. Nothing about him inspired fear in you. The relationship you had with him was built on trust and solidarity. Even when he was angry, you weren’t afraid to be honest with him.

You swallowed. “Do you want the honest answer?”

He scoffed. “Is that even a question?”

“I didn’t want you to cancel the deal,” you admitted quietly.

Seokjin was in disbelief and decided to repeat it back to you, almost to make sure you understood what you were saying. “You wanted me to approve the contract for you to be a sexual servant to your ex?”

Well, when he put it like that it did sound awful. You shrugged. “I don’t have a good explanation for you, boss.”

There was no way you could explain your relationship with Jinyoung. It would take days, weeks even. The two of you had been through so much together, so much damage and evil and every fucking thing that could go wrong did go wrong. You both were forged in the same fires.

“There are rules here,” said Seokjin, pragmatic. “Rules in place specifically for drama like this.”

You nodded. “I understand that.”

“Clearly you don’t,” he interjected, like a parent scolding a child. “You have no idea how out of hand things get in situations like these.”

You remembered Jinyoung’s words on that day - I bought you so no one else would. Jinyoung would sell his soul before he let you sell your body.

“It’s not like that,” you tried to reason with him. “You don’t know our history.”

Seokjin shook his head and returned to his desk. “It doesn’t matter. I’m pulling the contract.”

You understood his fear. His entire business was founded on confidentiality and secrecy. Any form of drama or scandal could expose a lot of powerful people and put Seokjin back on the street.

You opened your mouth to argue, but an irritated voice behind you came first, “Is this how you conduct business around here?”

Both you and Seokjin looked to see Jinyoung entering the office with Jackson a step behind him. With their added presence, Hoseok joined only a second later.

“Mr. Park,” Seokjin began, emerging once again from behind his desk. “You should have been more forthcoming as to the nature of your relationship with…”

Jinyoung countered, “Maybe so, but that’s water under the bridge now. Did I just hear you proceeding to nullify my contract without consulting me?”

Seokjin set his jaw. “Putting your ex-girlfriend into an indentured contract to soothe your own…”

Jinyoung took a single step toward your boss and seethed. “Believe me, Mr. Kim. You don’t want to go there with me,” he hissed. “End the contract, but she is still to be paid the full balance for this month. Take your share as well. It doesn’t concern me.”

Hoseok called your name tenderly, drawing your attention, and said, “Don’t go with him. I’ve seen this happen before. It doesn’t end well like you think it does.”

“Hoseok,” you started, moved by his concern.

Jinyoung brushed past you, putting himself squarely between you and Hoseok, and asserted his territory. “And who the hell are you?”

Hoseok was not intimidated in the least. “I’m the one that’s been protecting her for the past four years. Who the hell are you?”

“Hoseok,” Seokjin beckoned, sensing the situation was going to devolve.

“I see how you’re looking at her,” Jinyoung snarled under his breath.

Hoseok didn’t deny it.

You grabbed Jinyoung’s arm, attempting to steer him away. “Jinyoung, don’t make a scene.”

“Considering your boss called you in here without me, solely to rip you a new asshole and then take the rest of your money, I’m past making a scene. I’m gonna make a fucking spectacle,” Jinyoung snapped, shifting his weight as you grasped his sleeve.

Seokjin drew your attention, speaking from a good place. “I’ve been where you are and I know how it ends. Think about what you’re doing.”

Your brow furrowed, but you knew he was referring to getting into bed with a dangerous lover. You had been ignorant to the power Jinyoung now held and how deeply he had rooted himself in the underworld of your city.

He was your Jinyoung and you could turn a blind eye to what he did because you were head over heels in love with him. Naively so, you had to admit. And for that reason, you believed Seokjin when he said he knew what it was like.

“Seokjin,” you spoke resolutely. “Thank you for everything. I owe you more than I will ever be able to repay in my lifetime, but please accept my resignation.”

Jinyoung stopped, angling to you in surprise.

You met Jinyoung’s penchant gaze and added, “Effective immediately.”

Hoseok called your name.

“I’m sorry,” you apologized with all sincerity. “I never meant for this to happen. I don’t want to cause you any harm after all that you have done for me.”

Seokjin accepted your apology and bowed in response.

Hoseok enveloped you in his arms when you hugged him goodbye and with his eyes intently on Jinyoung, whispered in your ear, “Be careful. Someone ratted you out.”

You blinked in surprise and the moment Hoseok let you go, you turned to face Jinyoung. There was no shock on his face, only aggression and anger. “Outside,” was all you said, tone low.

Silence, cold and unforgiving, between the two of you down the elevator, through the lobby, and finally to the top deck of the parking garage. Once in the fresh air, free from the potentially eavesdropping ears, you asked, “Did you tell him about us?”

“No.”

“Did you have someone tell him about us?”

“No.”

You scoffed out a laugh, mirthless. “You’re lying.”

Jinyoung snorted. “There is literally nothing I can say to appease you when you’re pissed.”

“Don’t manipulate me,” you snapped with a roll of your eyes. “Tell me the truth.”

Jinyoung smiled, though he was far from amused. “See that’s the thing with you. When you have an idea in your head you just want someone to confirm it, you don’t care what the truth is.”

“Oh, that’s rich coming from you. All you’ve ever done is pull my strings. The minute I do something outside of what you want, I get punished,” you yelled, bristling with annoyance.

Jinyoung shook his head. He had indulged you thus far, but was officially at the end of his rope. “I don’t have to stand here and take this from you. You of all people. You left me because I did what you didn’t want.”

This was the weak spot of the relationship; the one unmistakable fact that always tore the two of you apart.

You would always assume he was lying, because that’s what he did. He would always assume you would leave him, because that’s what you had done.

Tears filled your eyes and the next words left your mouth like venom, “You don’t love me. You just want to own me.”

Jinyoung approached slowly, something dark manifesting in his eyes. Not until he was within arms’ reach of you did he whisper, “I love you with my heart and soul and every fucking breath in my body.”

Your eyes widened.

Then, he condescended, “But right now I’m not in the mood to deal with your self-righteous ass. Yugyeom will take you to dinner. Use my damn card.” And with that, he turned and proceeded to leave.

Rooted in place, you shouted after him, “Jinyoung!”

He kept walking away, no hesitation in his step.

Spiteful, you continued to shout, “It’s my turn to ignore you for three days!”

Still stomping off, Jinyoung raised a hand and waved, retorting, “Be my guest!”

You practically snarled, clenching your hands into fists as he hopped into his car, Jaebeom behind the wheel, and drove away.

Pivoting on your heels, you faced Jackson and Yugyeom and they turned their heads in opposite directions, pretending they hadn’t seen your petty lovers’ quarrel. Saying nothing, you trudged toward them and jumped into the backseat.

The moment you were concealed behind tinted windows, your lips spread into a wide smile that reached your eyes.

Jinyoung said he loved you.

Pulling out your phone, you texted him shamelessly, You said you love me.

A return text chimed not a minute later. Who is this?

You laughed aloud, propping your head in your hand against the window. The love of your life, you replied.

I see three days went by fast, was his retort.

You sighed. Don’t keep me away too long this time.

The next text took an extra minute to deliver, Come to the penthouse after dinner.

You smirked wryly and typed, I think I’ll sleep in my own bed tonight, Mr. Park. Goodnight.

Jinyoung looked down at the screen and pursed his lips. Sensing he had lost this round, he texted back, Goodnight, baby.

Jaebeom pulled a vibrating phone from his pocket and handed it to Jinyoung, saying, “Mark confirmed it.”

Jinyoung looked at the image and frowned. It was from a surveillance camera, captured in black and white. Jiwon and Seokjin; a seemingly harmless photo of two men talking on the street.

“He’s getting closer,” Jaebeom commented under his breath, speeding through a yellow light.

Jinyoung’s phone chimed with another text. The number was unknown and Jinyoung’s eyes widened in disbelief at the image attached.

It was you, standing on the deck of the parking garage, watching Jinyoung walk away only moments ago. The sunset was a clash of colors in the background and you had never looked more radiant.

She’s so beautiful, read the text beneath. Shall I take her away or shall I make her hate you, Jinyoung-ie?

Jinyoung stared at the text, reading it over and over. “Too fucking close,” he finally murmured.

← previous chapter | next chapter →

a/n : this story was previously Lacuna on my old blog, minheoney. I’m really excited to finally finish it! This fic was my baby for so long and I’m ridiculously happy to give it a new home :)

Hey there, beautiful! If you enjoyed this, please leave a like or reblog or follow me! Or maybe buy me a coffee so I can keep writing? Or check out my masterlist here for more stories! Thanks for reading :) - Katya

This work is fictional and for entertainment purposes only, but is licensed and protected under a creative commons attribution-noncommercial-noderivatives 4.0 international license. Any instances of plagiarism will be dealt with accordingly. Do not re-post or translate without my permission.

#got7 fanfiction #got7 #park jinyoung #got7 smut #jinyoung smut #park jinyoung smut #got7 fanfic #jinyoung fanfic #jinyoung fanfiction #got7 scenario #got7 imagine #jinyoung scenario #jinyoung imagine

520 notes · View notes