#like god i hate it
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i miss them strong sudden wave of i miss them i miss them so much fuck ive been watching their photo too often they're so pretty but also it's so obvious we're miles away in every aspect im glad at least i attempted to right the nasty 2021 "separation" im disappointed in how 2022-2023 reunion went im disappointed in what i did. im glad i was only weak like once in 2024. i dont intend to fuck up this year ive been thinking off them too much i need to stop ugh sigh
#like ik why#but im pretty sure this time arnd im really too busy n itherwise occupied to cave#I'll be strong#like god i hate it#idky whenever I feel like im out at sea they're the onoy thing i can think of to save me#it's so stupid it can be anyone else#but no so many years after n it's still them#when will it no longer be them#i dont want anyone but them n it's frustrating n sickening#like im over it ive accepted it#i dont even think it's feasible or wld work out#but still tht part of me just idek#i hv a them shaped hole in my life n thts tht#n the sucky thing is ide think they fit there anymore#i dont think i want a past version of them#but i guess i do#idk what it is#n myb there's someone else who cld fill it#but trying to find someone else isnt appealing#the idea is scary bc i wsnt even looking for them in the first place#god i feel like I'll always be a little bit crazy abt this#sadge#ahahahah#im nit crying u are#cloud nonsense
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if you have a transfem lover I do not even know how to begin to explain how important it is that you touch her without her having to ask
#puppy barks#obviously like some people won't want that#but god what I wouldn't give to be fucking#explored? worshipped?#someone just grabbing me and feeling me like I'm the most beautiful creation on earth.#like they can't have enough of me.#and i hate feeling like I have to ask for it.#I want to feel like loving me like that comes naturally.
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only you.
#alt versions under the cut!#my art#arcane#jayce talis#viktor arcane#jayvik#these two have infested my brain like mold#oh god its yooouuuuuu that i liieeeeee wiiiiiith#sweat this out of myself in the brief three days i spent home (want to go backkkkk im tired im nauseous im in my hate everyone era againn)#i just want to feel better!!!!!!!!!#letting myself go a little bonkers with this helped a little but the guilt over not progressing with my thesis film is going to consume me#anyway. enough of using the tags as a confessional. bone apple teeth
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HOT, SINGLE, UNSTUDIED SPONGES. 3000 NAUTICAL MILES AWAY. Come sail the distance and read Tiger Tiger!
#tiger tiger#ludovica bonnaire#remy bonnaire#jamis arlesi#This comic has been on my radar for *years* and I only recently - finally - sat down to read it. And by god is it amazing.#I don't want to spoil anything! But if you like amazing art and character writing *and* high seas adventure? READ TIGER TIGER.#If you asked my who my favourite character is I could not tell you. I truly like them all!!!#I even like the sleezeball who has less charm than a dead rat. He's *my* darling little rat man. With every disease.#A special shout out to my lad (he is the lad of all time) Jamis Arlesi.#Who - upon walking into frame makes me go 'Sir! Is your bosom too heavy? Do you need a new bra? My hands are free on Thursdays!'#And Ludo! My lass! I love her dearly! Every page made me more fond of her.#Book smart and uses it in very good ways! Naive enough to think it is all she needs! Learns a lot and stays kind through the horrors!#I could go on and on but...you...the person reading this...you *are* going to read it - aren't you?#So I'd hate to spoil you any more! Go read Tiger Tiger! Do it! For the sea sponges!#Rumour has it they are also freshly divorced. It was messy. Sea sponge needs a distraction. That could be you. Distracting that sponge.#You wont know until you click that link and start reading!
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so in an attempt to actually use positive thinking, anytime i fuck up and my brain reacts as if ive cause a minor apocalyptic event, i compare my fuck up to the 4 minute fuck up committed by the crew of the uss william d porter.
and only today, as i was having to explain what happened to my mom when i was explaining the whole comparison thing, did i realise that most people dont know about it and ive decided that needs to change because its objectively hilarious.
...which is a weird thing to say about an event that occured on a warship in 1943, specifically november 14th.
see the uss william d porter was a fletcher-class destroyer but you dont need to know what that means, just that she had guns that went bang bang and that she was escorting another ship, the uss iowa, to cairo.
while they were on their way there, they performed some gun trials like testing the anti-aircraft guns or the torpedos. and while they were running a torpedo drill, the crew of the porter managed to fire a live torpedo straight at the iowa which you know, in terms of a list of things to do while escorting a ship, shooting a torpedo at them is not on that list.
especially if the president of the united states is on board.
yeah so fdr was on board and the gun trials were actually his idea, and part of the trials was that they were conducted under radio silence.
and that means the crew of the porter couldnt just call the iowa to be like "move out the way, we accidentally shot a torpedo at you."
but they did have signal lamps and you know, the signalman on board was trained to signal this exact kind of message.
...and uh never mind, the signalman did manage to successfully tell the iowa that a torpedo was coming toward them but wasnt as successful when it came to the direction the torpedo was coming from.
not all hope is lost though because the signalman could still use the signal lamp to correct his previous mistake and-, never mind, he announced that the porter was reversing, which she wasnt.
yeah so at catastrophic mistake number 3, they broke radio silence to warn the iowa and she managed to turn out of the way just in time which meant no one got hurt. and even though the inquiry into the incident led to chief torpedoman (fantastic job title btw) lawton dawson being sentences to hard labour, fdr intervened and waved away his sentence, saying it was all an accident.
but yeah, so thats my new measure for "how much did i really fuck up?" and when i compared accidentally picking up a pencil case without a tag on it in wilko, turns out it was a very minor fuck-up. yes, the cashier had to ask another worker to grab a duplicate so they could scan the barcode, but i didnt nearly kill the president during wartime via accidental friendly fire
#kai rambles#so like#i enjoy ships and learning about them and looking at them but like#i dont really care for warships#i dont hate them viscerally like i do cruise ships but i never really care for them#apart from the ones that were just like either ridiculously designed like the hms captain or the vasa or the novgorod#or the ones where just insane shit happened like with the william d porter#like this isnt even the extent of the porters unfortunate incidents like shr was sank by a kamikaze attack that MISSED#but somehow ended up below the ship and exploded and just like yeeted the porter out of the water#william d porter#uss william d porter#ww2#world war 2#world war ii#warships#again warships are really not my thing but god some of them are so fucking funny#uss iowa#fdr#franklin d. roosevelt#this suddenly got so many notes in like less than 24 hours what the fuck#shipposting
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Just a reminder for the official writing team and fandom
#wc#warrior cats#warrior cats fanart#splashtail#mothwing#like pre oots ending#it is a common stereotype that Athiests “hate God”#that is not what being an Atheist is#it's about not believing in a God(s)/Starclan in this case#or not thinking a God(s)/Starclan exists#srry this was just bothering me#also I misspelled Atheist in this rip lol#my art
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i hate perspective. happy new years also
#i wanted to do something with j as a new years post but didnt have the patience to actually get it done#so instead i just went with what i was already drawing#nuvi nuvi nuvi nuvi nuvi nuvi nuvi#finally i've been able to draw this robo god damn ship#it has been clouding my mind for MONTHS#and i've finally been able to draw it#trying to color and slightly shade for the first time in. a while#violentbitingbiscuits#nuvi#nuziv#theres five hundred names for this ship dude#can you fandom people get it together and just settle on one#drew half of this last night and the other half today and surprisingly did not hate what i got done yesterday#amazing. can my mind do that for all my other art instead of despising it once a 5 hour timer is up#murder drones#murder drones uzi#uzi doorman#murder drones n#serial designation n#murder drones v#serial designation v#i love the concept that uzi crumples like tissue paper when given any affection#v pfp is an old sketch i dont think i posted on here dont mind it
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Hate Gerald. none of this would’ve happened without him.
#sonic movie 3 spoilers#sonic movie spoilers#stobotnik#agent stone#jimbotnik#agent stone x robotnik#robotnik x stone#sassy stone I love youuu#bring me back to the person I was before this movie oh my god#Gerald hate club#this is what my grieving process looks like
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i love you royal trio (minus akechi)
#i was listening to the world we knew by frank sinatra while drawing this to inflict maximum emotional damage 😔#royal actually shot me fifty times in the chest and slaughtered my entire family#i’m actually inconsolable over the ending what the fuck do you mean akechi chooses to die of his own volition rather than be manipulated#god it’s just. his character actually makes me violent and insane. they’re going to drag me kicking and screaming to the psych ward#he never had an ounce of control over his life. not even once. he was CONSTANTLY being yanked around like a marionette#until he was disposed of as another pawn in shido’s plan#and then out of some cruel irony he was resurrected even though he did not want to be alive#for once in death he would have found peace—only for that to be taken from him too.#and bc he thinks he’s worthless and his life is so easily gambled away he doesn’t view it as a major dealbreaker when maruki brings it up#“do you really think something as trivial as my life should stand in the way of your decision?” yes you fucking asshole#what do you mean he’s literally fated to die in every timeline? definition of doomed by the narrative#there’s not a single version of his story that doesn’t end with him being slaughtered#GODDDDD he makes me violently ill i hate goro akechi so much he’s so fucking selfish HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE THAT THIS DEAL IS TEARING ME APART#i was so tempted to get the bad ending just so that he was alive ☹️#he looked so happy. he was surrounded by people who loved and treasured him.no shido. control over his life. the ability to choose his futu#TEARS IN MY EYES MARUKI WAS THE ONLY VILLAIN WHO WAS LOWKEY MAKING SENSE 😭😭😭😭😭#my toxic trait is that i think maruki was right all along 😔#ALSO SUMIRE AAUUGGHHHH 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#the survivors guilt literally eating her alive until the point where she gaslighted herself into thinking she was her sister. insane.#royal was so good bro i’m so glad i endured 200 hours of hell just to play it#terrible terrible ending with everyone going their separate ways and ren ending up in juvie for months#akechi actually being dead in the good ending is so fucked up 😭😭 i thought there was some way maruki could bring him back regardless#not ren hallucinating him in the last cutscene too 😭😭😭😭 “i still see your shadows in my room” ahh ending#persona 5 royal#persona 5#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#sumire yoshizawa#goro akechi#lotus draws
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2021 me would think this was beautiful fanart
#jayvik#LIKE. WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY DID THIS#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#arcane league of legends#viktor arcane#jayce talis#LIKE IN THE SHOW#FRFR#ON GOD#THEY. THEY. THEY.#god i hate gay people
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The Watchers’ Favourites
#grian#jimmy solidarity#martyn inthelittlewood#itlwart#grian fanart#solidaritygaming fanart#martyn itlw#inthelittewood fanart#traffic life#trafficblr#traffic smp#how do you people function there’s so many tags#I like to call them “doomed by the narrative and hated by the gods trio”#Pigin is artistic#also these were done on index cards lmaooo#the corners are gold tape but it didn’t photograph well
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Hello ! I positively adore the running joke of Idia unknowingly finding Lilia to be the coolest guy ever whenever he doesn't know it's him, like when Silver described his father, or obviously with muscle red. I can't say what'd be funnier, Idia finding out his online best friend is actually Lilia, resident spooky hyper fairy; or them both never finding out, and it'd become even more ridiculous as time goes on. How do you think it'll play out ? You're always so on point
(Also, though it makes sense, I'm still devastated bat boy didn't get a ticket for the Halloween skeleton train : ( does anyone mentions him at some point ? Like how he'd have fit right in with all those Halloween town little freaks, and how he'd have impressed them with his spooks and scared techniques; after all he's been every Briar Valley's children worst fear on Halloween for centuries. I'm on the eng server and I didn't wanna spoil myself by watching the whole thing on youtube)
Have a nice day !
you and me both, Idia and Lilia being oblivious online BFFs (+ Idia being incredibly intimidated any time Silver brings up his jock gamer dad) is my favorite running joke/subplot. 🤝 it's SO good, to the point where I also am unsure if I actually want it to ever be resolved or not...maybe, like, as a post-canon stinger or something? everyone's standing around covered in overblot ink, and Idia and Lilia's phones go off at the same time...
(legit I do think this is part of why Idia couldn't be present for Lilia's dream, because for some reason Lilia decided he was going to just. embody his past self online. he probably quotes his own battle strategies or whatever in the middle of boss fights. Idia didn't pick up on the whole "oh how weird that we both live on a super remote island" thing, but he would spend thirty seconds listening to General Lilia describing siege warfare and be like "w-wait")
all that aside, however it does end up happening, I do see Lilia being very blasé and all "oh! cool!" about it. y'know, taking it very much in stride! and Idia...very much not.
(can't tell if tumblr is going to chew this into illegibility or not, this will be a fun surprise ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ)
as for Lilia sadly missing out on Halloweentown shenanigans...he does get one little mention as part of an offhand reference to the light music club, but so far no one has brought up how this basically is just Lost In the Book of Liliatown (Sebek's been too busy yelling about not getting to be in the same group as Malleus). 😔 honestly though, it's probably for the best that he got left out, because he would just settle right in and refuse to ever leave. canon would shatter. we would miss out on all the delightful angst of episode 7 because Lilia is too busy eating poisonous shrubbery inbetween practicing his very best screams, and no one can pull him away from it.
(I can hope for a sequel next year though...)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#gentle spoilers but y'know. just in case#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#most of the kitchen scene was jade messing with the firsties and that was so delightful that i didn't think til after#that you'd think sebek would have made some kind of reference to lilia 'i lost my tastebuds in the war' vanrouge's quote-unquote cooking#ah well. jade being mean is more than entertaining enough#looking forward to more of it tomorrow!#god. lilia and idia though.#lilia is like. genuinely idia's best friend and neither of them have any idea#and idia keeps doing that 'ha ha what if we were friends out of game too? what if we met offline? jk jk jk uNLESS...👉👈'#and then he immediately chickens out because he's so convinced that crimson will hate him if they ever met irl#(meanwhile lilia is just like 'my online bestie is so cool :) la la la')#they are both so stupid and i love them so much#i've just realized that i actually do want them to find out each other's identities#because idia doesn't just go to school with his online bff#he ALSO goes to school with his online bff's extremely supportive and extremely socially-inept kids#idia is going to get invited to dinner at diasomnia and it's going to be SO awkward#silver is going to give a long formal speech thanking him for being a stalwart comrade and trusted warrior brother to his father#as sebek stews in jealousy that idia got to fight by lilia-sama's side >:(#while idia sits there like 'all i did was link him a video about lane control for his character class'#malleus will make such an effort to learn literally anything about online gaming and he won't understand a word of it#it will be SUCH a disaster and i very much do want it now
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Just a little guy.
More thoughts on this.
#i wanna do the others too#soon#im sick thats why i have time to draw now#one piece#monkey d. luffy#one piece fan art#roronoa zoro#tony tony chopper#black leg sanji#cyborg franky#nico robin#cat burglar nami#one piece jinbe#god usopp#humming brook#also none of this is shipping#I like my straw hats found family#no hate tho just thought I'd share
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:-P
#me: ive gotta read so fucking much by monday if i dont wanna look like a fucking idiot in my lab meeting monday#also me: if i dont draw maid sanji right fucking now im gonna puke#can u tell what my 2nd favorite shojo was in high school? many scenes still live rent free in my head#clannad was my 1st fave btw lol#also. god i kno i say this on every sanji post but i think abt him so much ever sing day#she is my absolute favorite babygirl. i hate him. i want her to suffer forever#female sanji#me in 2014: what if girl sanji? me in 2024: what if girl sanji???#vinsmoke sanji#sanji#roronoa zoro#zosan#one piece
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ARCANE LEAGUE OF LEGENDS: 2x03 - “Finally Got The Name Right”
#arcane#caitvi#arcaneedit#arcane season 2 spoilers#arcane league of legends#league of legends arcane#vi#vi arcane#arcane vi#caitlyn kiramman#heenot#caitlyn#caitlyn arcane#type: gif#media: arcane#league of legends#s2 ep3#i needed to get this scene outta my system..... oh hardened cait.... changed and driven by her grief and anger over jinx#then we see vi who stubbornly clings onto the sweet cupcait she once knew... just like she was holding onto powder#but the heartbreaking part is that she's changed and vi STILL tries to give everything to caitlyn because shes so self sacrificing#and hoping that the caitlyn she once knew is still there but im so so sorry vi but cupcait is gone look at cait wanting to pull the trigger#just look at the pain behind vi's eyes she cant believe cait would be like this god im in pain#shes trying so hard to reel the cait she knew back in GAHHHHHH#also i hated coloring this scene but whats new with dark scenes from arcane lol
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I love how in dunmeshi everyone’s like god laios what’s wrong with you you’re such a freak and then they turn around and immediately go oh my god falin I love how much of a freak you are I’m obsessed with you you’re so weird never change and then you look at them and they’re like. the same
#dungeon meshi#biggest culprits for this phenomenon are shuro and marcille#I love when shuro is like god I’ve been in love with falin for ages shes so weird and has weird interests and acts different#and then IMMEDIATELY he goes AND YOU LAIOS. IVE ALWAYS HATED HOW YOURE WEIRD AND HAVE WEIRD INTERESTS AND ACT DIFFERENT
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