#like bruh they knew what they were doing w his lines | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

survivalist-anon · 5 months ago

Text

Log 26: "Great, now there's two of them"

The scenic route had calmed the tension between Fjord and Ronnie. The two were discussing on Fjord's misadventures with me in town. I was just simply listening quietly, just giving myself time to think a little.

Walking down the thicket, the smell of wet pine needles had resurrected a recent memory of mine...the first time I saw an Astartes....that....horned one. It's been surreal to see how diverse these guys are so far....but it makes me wonder what else I don't know about their lives...maybe something I shouldn't know.

"-and then, she opens the air lock, and BAM the alien gets sent into space! Man, you really ought to watch it like man. It's a classic.", Ronnie had just finished explaining the whole plot to Aliens, Fjord was listening intently.

"Ay, sounds like a brave guardsman, this... Sigourney. Hmmm...", I've always found it interesting that somethings tap into the minds of others as either fiction or real.

This whole experience has been so unreal, ever since that day....why did it comeback to the very same spot? Considering what has been going on, did grampa have anything to do with that horned Astartes?....or was it just a freak encounter....

Fjord raised his head up, sniffing the air a bit, "ah we're here. Almost in the same spot too.", as the three of us emerged from the tree lining, we were more than 'in the same spot ', we somehow ended up right on the same patch of concrete wall where Fjord was hit with those huge guns.

"I see they have yet to patch up the wall...Ha, laziness I suppose....or everyone is dead.", Fjord casually stated.

"Dead?!", Ronnie exclaimed, "W-what do you mean dead?".

Fjord tilted his head to him, "Well for starters lad, Imperial Fists never leave a job undone. Secondly, for the job of an Imperial Fist to go ud-"

Suddenly, a familiar shout echoed from the other side of the wall.

"PASSWORD!"

Fjord knew exactly who that was, and he was going to take his chance, he gave the both of us a mischievous grin. "YOUR MOTHER!", he heartily shouted.

Ronnie just stood there in amazement. "bruh... really?"

I for one was expecting another shoot out, "if anyone takes out a gun, cover your ears."

"wait they're pack heat??", Ronnie snapped his head towards me.

We could hear the scuffled stomping of metal boots, momentary labored huffing and the unfortunate clicking of someone loading a firearm. I look up and see the world's grumpiest looking mask I have ever seen, it practically had a permanent frown. "WRONG PASSWORD YOU SON OF A- ohh it's y-WAIT WHY DO YOU HAVE TWO OF THEM NOW!?!".

"Oh hey, nice to see you again, please don't shoot us again.", I give a friendly wave hoping he recognizes us from last time.

I could see he was looking at all three us, flabbergasted a bit. ".... DOES ALDERCON KNOW YOU'RE HERE!", he shouted back.

I look to Ronnie to see his reaction, he seems to be getting exited about the situation, a bit scared but he's perked up.

"damn, th-thats a huge gun...", he looks to Fjord's utility belt and sees his piece. "Oooooh...what caliber is that?", he sheepishly asks.

Fjord looks to Ronnie, "ugh .75 I believe, some use bigger shots for bigger targets-", he shoots his head to the fist, "-Ugh no he doesn't know! Surprise visit really!", I could tell the unexpected visit was going to cost us.

The guard was pacing back and forth, grumbling to himself, "ALRIGHT! BUT IM ONLY LETTING YOU IN BECAUSE YOU AND YOUR HANDLER HAVE A HOSTAGE!", he then disappears back from the top of the wall, thudding down the stairs.

Ronnie looked at the both of us, "What the? Hostage??? You guys tricked me or something?!"

"No no, let him think that, just don't make any sudden movements, comments or anything. These guys are like the jughead's back at Tallimook? Yeah, think that but way more serious.", all us then turn our heads to a near seamless door appear at the base of the wall.

"Come on. You will be escorted to Aldercon himself.", he turns to somebody out of our line of sight, "Search the new comer.", is the three of us reluctantly walk through the door way, two other Marines, one blue and another yellow one are standing guard with him.

"Well well well, I had heard that there was a handler chosen after all this time, which one is it? The female or the male?", the blue one coldly asked. "Hmf, the female most likely.... considering the Astartes." The yellow sneered, Fjord had mentioned to me that his group of Marines had always been seen in a bad light...it makes me wonder what is the reality of Space wolves in that case.

Fjord understandably gave a low growl, "you'll show respect for my 'handler'.....", I could practically see his hair stand on end.

Ronnie stuck to me like glue, "dang, this is some intense shit. Also why does one of them looks like Big Blue?".

The one with blue snapped his head towards us, "That showboating fool?! An absolute disgrace to the Ultramarines! Instead of seeking the rest of his chapter, he's gallivanting around....the Codex does NOT allow for such a grievous waste of time.", he groned.

"Hey man c'mon, he's saving lives and stoping some serious crimes in Philly. Shits serious down there. At least he's helping.", I guess Ronnie was a fan of Big Blue than.

I turn to Ronnie and whisper, "please this isn't a time to be brave, these guys are the real deal. Like straight from...where ever they're from.", unlike Fjord, I couldn't read these guys for the life of me. Whether it be their helmets or cadence in their tone....these guys were scary.

"How would you appreciate your soldiers in your homewold's army doing the same thing? Would that not be subordination?", doubling down on his opinion.

"Oh come off it! Besides, we need good rapport with the Earth mortals, I'm certain your primarch wouldn't be too upset about it. After all, he is probably enjoying his new found purpose.", the guard retorts. "Now move it.", returning to his gruff demeanor.

Motioning to the both of us, Fjord turns to us and nods, "do not worry, I'm never out numbered.", shining a mischievous grin.

I genuinely felt safer knowing that at least. I turn to Ronnie to see he was looking around cautiously. "Lorey, did ...did you go through here?"

I shake my head, "no, we went over the wall actually. That's what that big hole was."

"Speaking of which lass, you fists forgot that hole in the wall or something? Or were you all finding a nice frame for it?", he chuckled.

The two fists look at each other with shock, I guess from their perspective there was any hole.

As we walk to the other side, we can see that there was a little more activity than last time. More Marines were walking around, just tending to their own chores and such. There was that friendly marine, Sha'kal, monitoring a group of them, it looks like they're doing some military exercises. As we pass by I could see he glaces back, that smile beaming like always and a friendly.

Funny enough, the other Marines saw that, glanced at our direction to see who he was waving at. One stopped as he was jogging, causing a domino effect while the furthest in the back made a sudden stop.

The both of us winced a little, "Oops, sorry!", I had to apologize.

"Hello Lorey, it is a pleasure to see you and Fjord again! Oh and don't worry, they're fine! Right gentlemen?", as he addressed three of them on the ground getting up, groaning from their own pile up.

Ronnie's eyes were wide open, if it was anymore hammed up he'd rubbing his eyes. "Woah...I...ugh...I thought-".

"That they were all in mechanical suits? No you're half right but that's all muscle down there.", personally, I was enjoying the view.

"...yeah....ugh...they're...huge...all of them...", he glanced at Fjord who waved back Sha'kal, he started to put the pieces together. He leans to whisper, "Are these guys like....super mutant government experiments or something?".

The guard fist snaps his head to him, "Watch it mortal! We're angels of the Imperium.".

"...no idea what angles these guys have seen but ok go off.", Ronnie grumbled.

Off into the distance, Aldercon had finally arrived to the surface from another entrance, he was out of his big, bulking yellow armor and into something more akin to a standard military uniform of a high ranking officer.

"Miss.Drake! I see you have breached our agreement in a record time of 70 hours, 20 mins and 48 seconds. Hmf, calculations correct as always.", he didn't seem too angry but that snide comment of his was a good sign he wasn't too pleased. Makes sense.

He marched right up to Ronnie, immediately intimidating him. Looking at him up and down like newly recruited meat. "....Stand up straight, boy! James has relayed quite a lot about you so I expect the best out of you. So far, you have the stance of a slacker, but I can you have guts, a newly acquired chip on your shoulder to boot .... likely grieving for someone's loss, my condolences....., yet James has told me you have the qualifications of a team leader. Good. Now then.....Miss.Drake why have you breach our agreement in keeping our existence safe?". The stoic tone in his voice was giving me the strangest sense of anxiety...than again.

"It seems we may have a... situation on our hands....one of the rangers from my work place was....killed.", I would imagine the next thing was going to happen was some semblance of a report, hopefully I'm not one filing anything.

Ronnie within every word Aldercon commanded he had stood straight like a soldier, at first it was an immediate response in fear until he heard Jame's name. "Wait hol'up you know James?", he looked Aldercon in the eyes, which was considerably a big mistake.

The Ronnie's colors flushed from his face with a shift of Aldercon's eyes. His knees even started to shake a little.

"....Yes....I do know your boss James. Like Miss.Drake, he was my handler when I had first come to your world.", the look on Aldercon's eyes was one of hatred or anything truly malignant, but it was akin to being starred down but a large animal.

I put my hand on his shoulder. "It's ok Ron, he isn't going to do anything. These guys have a ....rather complex life, trust me they're serious for good reason. But they're not going to hurt you. I promise.". The look of worry on Ronnie's face was telling.

Shaking his head a little, Aldercon than turns to Fjord. "Don't you think you're out of my line of sight fuzzball! That stunt of yours with the law enforcement officer could have cost us.".

Fjord gave an awkward smile, he knows what he did. "Hehe... At least I missed?".

"Come, I believe we need to register our.... reluctant new mortal here.... considering he works close with you and James, I believe it would be wise to have.... extra eyes.", he turned around, heading towards the same entrance we had gone in before.

Loosening up a little now that Aldercon wasn't looking at him, Ron let out a heavy sigh of relief. "Bruh, Lorey...how does he know James?! What the hell is a handler? A-and-", he stopped mid sentence and saw the training group from earlier, it seemed that that were now just taking a quick break and tossing around what looked like a huge football, but I could tell it looked HEAVY. I could even hear the impact of the ball hitting there palms from all the way where we were standing.

I turn to see what he was looking at, "aw, they know how to play football."

The wheels in Ronnie's head were definitely turning, "Lore...these are built different... aren't they".

"yeah, they' are....they definitely are....", I responded.

"......why do....we feel like they're....ugh...", Ronnie couldn't find the words to say without them likely sounding insulting.....but it was probably the same thoughts as me.....

~~~~~~~~

Later, heading down into the fort, I could see Ronnie had begun to feel a lot more awe struck rather than worried.

"Daaaang this place is huge! It's like some secret government agent kind of shit.", his head was looking at pretty much all the same things I had been looking at.

The bustling construction on some of the walls have moved on to other parts of the underground fort.

"Now, 'Ronnie', what you see here has no affiliation with any of your planet's government agencies, national administrations or any corporate or political group. We are our own governing body here.", Aldercon concluded stoically.

The tilt of Ronnie's head was hard to miss, "I'm sorry...did you say 'planet', like....y'all from outer space?".

I remembered that Fjord would sparingly allude to them coming from some other world but to actually be confirmed this by Aldercon is definitely a little bit more heavy. "Ugh, can you better explain that actually? I think this is the first time I'm hearing this too.".

His eyes shifted to view both of us individually, like a mounted camera, he let out a heavy yet strangely gentle sigh for a man his girth.

"If you two will make the assumption that we as the Astartes, warriors and guardians of the Imperium are ....as some would understandable consider us...."aliens"....as per the definition of 'someone from a different/foreign land'....you both would be correct... however -", he leans over the both of us, shadowing us like a great wall.... probably comparable to the fort's concrete wall outside.

"-we....are human.....not Xenos....do you understand me?". His stare would burn holes into our brains if he could....

I nodded my head, I look to see Ronnie nodding his head as well....

"Good...now.... about that rouge marine....", he concluded.

End of log 26

@kit-williams @barn-anon @egrets-not-regrets @gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan @walking-natural-disaster @starfrost740 @squishyowl @sleepyfan-blog @lawnchair86

#space marine husbandry #warhammer 40k #space marine #survival log #space marines #space marine husbandry sentience #space wolves #imperial fists

10 notes · View notes

liverpool-enjoyer · 2 years ago

Text

footballers as taylor swift songs

requested by my swiftie in Christ @yudgefudge!! thank you luv <3

leo: you're on your own, kid. ive been associating him w this song way before i knew that everyone else was doing the same lmao. it rlly does encompass his entire journey, from humble beginnings n jus being a little kid playing for fun (from sprinkler splashes/to fireplace ashes), to being the best in the world n all the struggles that come with it (i search the party.../just to learn that my dreams arent rare). the man gave his blood sweat n tears like hed be saved by a the "perfect kiss" which here is a metaphor for the wc obviously. n ohmygosh "everything you lose is a step you take"!!!! BRUH???!?!?! every line, from "i didnt chose this town (ie paris)/i dream of getting out/theres just one who could make me stay", to "the jokes werent funny, i took the money/my friends from home dont know what to say" are all SO leo coded.

ney: anti-hero. i ADORE him n theres a lot of people that like him. but theres also a lot of people who like not liking him. hes one of the best in the world, and as great as that is, he has, unjustifiably so, garnered a significant amount of haters (its me, hi, im the problem, its me/at tea time, everybody agrees). hes rlly endured a ton of it throughout the years, but keeps going (pierced through the heart/but never killed). after facing so much backlash, youd probly worry about the people that still support you and how much longer you can hold on to that (one day i'll watch as youre leaving/and life will lose all its meaning). also, hes a rich person. which makes the bridge pretty relatable for him but like in a funny way.

gavi: nothing new. this one is more based off my inner musings than actual like evidence. i have no idea whats going on this lil dudes head. but i know that IF i were in his position, i'd relate to this song a FUCK TON. its basically a song abt being in the spotlight, n being the shiny young thing that has peoples attention. but what happens when thats not true anymore? (Lord, what will become of me/once ive lost my novelty?) what happens in a few years when an even younger prodigy comes around n impresses everyone? (are we only biding time 'til i lose your attention?/and someone else lights up the room?/people love an ingénue). im not gonna write down the whole birdge but its basically abt the inevitably of meeting your replacement. the song basically asks: "will you still want me/when im nothing new?" he seems like a happy dude who probly doesnt think abt this stuff, but if i were a famous promising young soccer player, this stuff would definitely weigh on my mind.

muller: the story of us. Lord forgive my mullendowski heart. i tried to think of a song that would fit jus him n leave shipping out of it but,,, yeah it wasnt happening. in my mind theyre a package deal. anywho the song's about being around someone youre still in love with after youve broken up (now im standing alone in a crowded room/and we're not speaking and im dying to know/is it killing you like its killing me). ik theyre on good terms n all but in my mindbrain i imagine him them being in the same place for the first time since lewy left him bayern and poor thomas jus "nervously pulling at my clothes/and trying to look busy." and my gosh "but you held your pride like you shouldve held me"??? the AUDACITY. i can go off about this whole song tbh. oh n also even tho speak nows a country album this song is kinda,,, rock/punk-ish kinda??? which is to say, its very loud. much like a certain someone. fun fact i almost put seven for him bc of "before i learned civility/i used to scream ferociously/anytime i wanted" but i figured one line wasnt enough for me to put the whole song.

mbappe: evermore. this is a brooding song. a depression song. so i can definitely see this as a post 2022 world cup final song for him. it actually relates to a sports loss very well. (i used to listen to this song n think a oikawa from haikyuu,,, heh). if theres one thing abt mbappe its that hes dedicated. i can see him "replay(ing) my footsteps on each stepping stone/trying to find the one where i went wrong," yknow, jus thinking abt the final over n over. very "i rewind the tape but all it does is pause/on the very moment all was lost." but at the end of it all, hes young, hes talented, n has more world cups ahead of him. ie: "i had a feeling so peculiar/this pain wouldnt be for/evermore."

klopp: dear reader. this whole song is just advice. its taylor dishing out advice to her fans, most of whom are younger than her. kloppo loves his players, he wants to give them good advice that applies not only on the pitch, but off it as well. (dear reader/bend when you can, snap when you have to/dear reader/you dont have to answer, just cause they asked you) however its no secret that our lovely manager can be pretty hard on himself. so its possible that while he gives advice to those he loves, he feels like hes not worthy of giving it (you wouldnt take my word for it/if you knew who was talking).

again, everything stated is speculation, fueled entirely by my delusional lil mindbrain. as i dont know these ppl.

#im sooooooooo sorry i didnt put as many as i normally do this was TOUGH #like youd think this would be easy for me but a lotta the times i'd find a song that i can only connect a player to a single lyric of #so it was a struggle #also i put my WHOLE ass into this so i WILL do a shameless reblog if i see fit #leo messi #neymar #gavi #thomas muller #robert lewandowski #mullendowski #kylian mbappe #jurgen klopp

54 notes · View notes

ninja-knox-ur-sox-off · 2 years ago

Text

GOOOOOD AFTERNOON ITS A FRESH NEW DAY OF A FRESH NEW WEEK, IT SNOWED AND I AM ABOUT TO WATCH THE 8TH EPISODE OF MONKIE KID SEASON 4

BUCKLE UP EVERYBODY HERE WE GO I FEEL LIKE THIS ONE IS GONNA BE WILDIN

I mean after the last ones it would make sense we hitting the TENSION

(hi future knox note real quick this one is a wild ride i had several moments and its p long so heads up HGL;ASDKFJDS)

M A N

this show is wild oKAY MOVING ON LETS GO

EPS CALLED THE BROHTERHOOD I ASSUME WE’RE GONNA GET SOME MORE BACKSTORY LORE HIT ME WITH IT LETS GO I’M READY

ANOTHER DRAMATIC DUUNNNN STARTBGSFM

MK ASKING RIGHT OFF THE BAT DARN RIGHT WHERE IS THE MONKEY GIVE HIM BACK

Sandy always advocating for explanations and communication ;-; you go Sandy

BRUH REALLY SAW HIM PLOTTING TO TAKE DOWN MONKEY KING HUH WAHT ACTUALLY HAPPENED I’M CURIOUS THEY DON’T USUALLY SAY STUFF OUTRIGHT WHATS THE TWIST

I’M SORRY???

THE WAY HE INHALES?????

EXCUSE ME???

WHATS WITH THAT FACE MR. SELF-RIGHTEOUS LOSER

I’m sorry I’m very hyped rn and holding Mk’s horrified face gently HGLS;ADKFJAW;OEFIJAF

BRUH WHATS WITH THAT FACE WHAT IS THIS

“SEE!!! HE’S BASICALLY ADMITTING IT!!” HELPGMLSKFMAEF

HE DOES LOOK SUPER FREKAING GUILTY

HUH REGRET HUH THAT’S A NEW LOOK

AW MEI YOU WERE? THAT’S HGSLKDFJDS PLS THAT’S ACTUALLY SO GREAT

“I knew you wouldn’t understand” * dramatic look to the side and closing eyes regretfully* SHUT UR DRAMATIC HECKING FACE OLD MAN WHO’S PROBBALY NOT THAT OLD BUT ALSO IS ANCIENT SQUARE UP

WDYM ITS EASIER TO ASK FOR FORGIVENESS NOT PERMISSION YOU HAVE THEIR FRIEND TRAPPED IN A SCROLL BOI THAT LINE APPLIES TO BORROWING A CAR NOT LOCKING AWAY A FRIEND FOR ALL ENTERNITY I KNEW HE WAS AT LEAST SLIGHTLY ANTAGONISTIC HECK PROBBALY THINKS HE’S DOING THE RIGHT THING TOO LOSER RELEASE THE MONKEY SCREAAAAAMS

MEI HAVING NONE OF THAT FR HGSDLKFJ “oooOooOo OOOKAAAY sUrE” HGSDJLFAL;WEF

HEY BRUH’S FAST

BET MONKEY KIGNS FASTER

nah actually that looks like a p similar speed-

wait what am i saying, the train scene, monkey king is still way faster—or well ig he could be the same speed just doesn’t need to use his full speed rnHECK DOESN’T MATTER GET THAT INKY NONSENSE AWAY FROM MY DRAGON HORSE GIRL GUY

We’re gonna have some great amv bits and transitions i’ma be able to use ngl I’m excitedGL;AKMFE

aRM

WHO’S ARM IS THAT

I’M GONNA GEUSS PENG RIGHT? THE BIRD GUY? YEAH THAT’S MY GUESS

I WONDER IF THAT’S ACTUALLY HIM WAIT HECK

IS IT INKY??? WOULD HE END UP ACTUALLY BEING IN THERE? HECK I DON’T KNOW S C R E A M S

OH THE SCREECHY EHCOY THING? YEAH PENG RIGHT? RIGHT???

SCREAMS

WDYM GREETINGS BACK OFF

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE CLOWN

Oh u pretty dramatic my boi look at you go

OH AZURE’S FACE??

HECK I’M SO

FASCINATED BY THIS GUY

LIKE HECKING MACAQUE ALL OVER AGAIN

THE PANIC AND JUST LOOKS LIKE HE CANT CONTROL ANYTHING CERTAINLY IS A LOOK ON THIS GUY DANG IT HE TRAPPED MY FAVOURITE MONKEY OF ALL TIME AND I STILL LIKE HIM DANG IT DANG IT DANG IT NICE TEETH DUDE I AM A HUGE FAN OF UNDERBITES IN CHARACTER DESIGN I DRAW PIGYS WITH EM FOR A REASON HECK THESE EPXRESSIONS HE’S MAKING LOW-KEY REMIND ME OF MONKEY KINGS EXPRESSIONS THIS IS FINE DO YOU ACTUALLY CARE ABOTU THESE KIDS DUDE??? THESE PEOPLE?? DO YOU?? WEIRDO??? WHAT CHAOS ARE YOU CAUSING THAT YOU THINK IS MONKEY KINGS FAULT? OR ARE BLAMING MONKEY KING FOR OR SOMETHING HEKC I DON’T KNOW I NEED TO STOP THINKING AND JUST PRESS PLAY HECK HECK

SANDY NO LONGER WANT AN EXPLANATION HUH GHSDLKFJSDF

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT WAIT SANDY FIGHTING???

HECK PUSHED TANG OUT OF THE WAY HECK

OH THE BIG BOYS OUT

HECK SO THESE ARE THE REAL DEALS THEN???

THEY WERE TRAPPED IN TEH SCROLL??

DID MONKEY KIGN DO THAT??

WAS HE TRYING OT GET THEM OUT??

HECK BRO I’VE GOT SO MANY QUESTIONS NOW HECK

AM I GONNA GET REAL ANSWERS OR ANSWERS WITH THE NARRATORS BIASES WHICH ISN’T ACTUALLY THE TRUTH AGAIN BECAUSE I’MA LOSE IT GD;AFMASDF

SAAANNDYYY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HECK

HECK

MK JUST

BEGGING

FREAKING HECK NOT THIS AGAIN

OHHH MAN THE FLICKERING

SHOW ME THE STUPID LIONS FACE AGAIN I WANNA SEEEE

OH WOW PENGS A GLOATER I SEE HOW IT IS

WE BEEN KNEW IG I SAW THIS COMING WHY AM I REACTINGNDFLKSMDF

BOI HECK PENG READY FOR MURDER

OH YEAH??

OH YEAH???

STOP HUH?

WHATCHA DOING THERE LOSER

ARE THEY GONNA LISTEN TO YOU?

YOU LOOK SO STUPID RN I’M SORRY I’M FINE I’M JUST HE LOOKS LIKE HE’S TRYING TO KEEP CONTROL OF A SITUATOIN THAT’S RAPIDLY SPIRALING OUT OF CONTROL DUE TO HIS OWN BAD DICISIONS HELLO WHERE HAVE WE SEEN THAT BEFORE, BROTHER LIKE BROTHER IG

HOLY CRAP DUDE THE

TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH AHAHAHA ANYWAY HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN

THATS

HECK DUDE

MK JUST

HECK CAN HE GET FIVE MINUTES

WITHOUT SOMEBODY BETRAYING HIM

OR USING HIM

OR HURTING HIS FRIENDS

FIVE MINUTES???

PLS??

JERKFACE

DUDE LOOKS

SO HAPPY TO ACTUALLY SEE THEM

THEY LOOK PRETTY HAPPY TO SEE HIM

WOW HE FR

TRAPPED MONKEY KING IN THERE

AND IS REUNITING WITH THESE GUYS HECK I DON’T KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT ANY OF THIS HECK

SIR YOU JUST BETRAYED THIS KID THAT TRUSTED YOU BUT HEY YOU GOT YOUR BROS BACK SO ITS FINE RIHGT? FREE TRUAMA FOR MK ITS FINE JUST GET IN LINE EVERYBODY ELSE DOES IT

guys i’m only two minutes in this is ridiculousHGSDKFJAOEWF

YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO SAY HIS NAME LIKE THAT

OR SMILE AT HIM LIKE THAT

SHOVE YOUR FACE IN DIRT

UM NO

NO OUT OF HAND

GIVE HIM BACK HIS MENTOR

oh pengs spear is kinda neat its bird shaped but also talon shaped but also spear shaped, very nice

LITERALLY HOW CAN YOU STAND THERE “haha, woopsie, silly me, sorry about that” WHILE HIS FRIENDS ARE ALL HURTING ON THE FLOOR MY GODS

WE DON’T WANT AN INTRODCUTION WE WANT AN EXPLANATION OLD MAN

SHUT UR GOSH DANG TOOFY MOUTH UNLESS YOU’RE GONNA EXPLAIN

WHY ARE THEY CHILLING NOW

AND JUST OHH HEY BROOO

NICE TO MEETCHA

WHAT IS THIS

HE’S SUCH A LOSER

WISE?

HE MUST NOT BE VERY WISE IF HE’S HANGING OUT WITH YOU

i’m only half joking I wanna see this fluffy fool obliterated hjGL;KSJF;AWE

Can I just say how hilariously like monkey king this guy seems to be

Mk just sweating like no but why why do this if like YEAH SERIOUSLY WHY

AND MEI JUST AIN’T NO DISCUSSION ABOUT IT HE’S A VILLIAN AND HE SUCKS

you know I actually want to take a second to appreciate Mei

she’s great

okay appreciation over

*DECKS AZURE WITH A CHAIR*

LITERALLY

THE “okay okay” IS JUST

MONKEY KING

BUT HEY IG HE’S OFFERING AN EXPLANATION

BUT LITERALLY ONLY WHEN HE ABOSLUTELY HAD TO LIKE

BRUH

LITERALLY ITS MONKEY KING BUT I WANT TO HIT HIM WITH A BOAT

JUST STRAIGHT UP SNATCHES MK

I DON’T LIKE THIS GUY

I DON’T LIKE HOW CLOSE HE’S STANDING TO MK

OR THE FACT HE ONLY EVER SEEMS TO BE TALKING DIRECTLY TO HIM AND NOBODY ELSE IN THE CREW

LIKE HE’S THE ONE PERSON HE NEEDS TO EXPLAIN THINGS TO AND GET FORGIVENESS FROM OR SOMETHIGN WHAT THE HECK I SALL THIS

OH YOUNGER AZURE

OH I WAS A STRAPPING LAD BACK THENGNSDFKMSDF

LOSER

or so ii thought

ooookaaayyyyyyyyyyy……..

interesting apprrooaaachhhhhhhhhhh

just be carrreeffullllll

I’m looking at you monkie kid crew villainizing the Jade emperor is a bit of a slippery slope there since he’s still kinda an important cultural figure bros

also interesting approach making Azure and ex-celestial dude

I’m sorry the ponytail is throwing me pls it looks so strangenGL;KAMWEOF

THATS

HELP THAT’S SO GOOFY

HECK WAIT

HHHHHH AAAAA

GGGGRRRRRRRR

AAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

kay look

l o o k

love the words this guy is saying

love em

I would ADORE

like words cannot describe how much I would adore the plot line of celestial warrior notices the guys he’s working for aren’t great and sees this monkey who fr just cares about everyone under his rule so he goes and devotes himself to that person instead and wants to see him rise to great heights to help more people and become an even greater ruler because he can see how much potential he has and no matter how many people say OH BIG CELESTIAL WARRIOR SHOULD RULE he knows he doesn’t have the same heart and just genuine care that this other person does so he always deflects to make sure he’s getting the best of it and being in charge where he can do the most good KAY I WOULD ADORE THAT BUT I KONW THAT’S NOT EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENS AND HE CLEARLY ASSUMED SOMETHING OR SOMEBODY TURNED ON SOMETHING BUT HECK H E C K PLS

HECK I KNEW HERE THERE WAS A WARRIOER WITH MY IDEALS UHUH YEAH THEN HE GETS TRUAMA BUT ITS FINE

ALSO

NGL

I REALLY LOVE

HOW THEY MAKE

EVEYRONE LOOK AT WUKONG PLS HGLSDKFOWE

just absolutely smitten platonically romantically whatever I just think its great how there’s just people like Macaque and Azure who just look at Wukong and just go “yup i’m gonna dedicate my life to this guy he’s so freaking cool, bro moment-“ AND THEN IG THEY PUT HIM TOO HIGH ON A PEDESTAL AND WHEN HE INEVITABLY WOBBLES THEY JUMP SHIP AND NOBODY CATCHES HIM WHEN HE FALLS I’M ASSUMING A LOT I’M JUST HECK HECK HECK THIS IS THE EXACT KINDA NONSENSE I WANT THIS IS RIDICULOUSGN;SDLKFMWEO F

Mk fr looks much calmer standing there next to Azure and i still got alarm bells going off, he’s way too used to standing next to people who want to hurt him his friends and monkey king hGLKJS;DF

“we we’re gonna change everything, it was glorious”

you mean you were gonna

try and fight heaven

and

overthrow the emperor

and inevitably get put back in your place

only monkey king takes the brunt of that-

SORRY STILL MAKING ASSUMPTIONS BASED ON MY JTTW KNOWLEDGE I KNOW THIS IS GONNA BE DIFFERENTNG;LSDKMFE

HANG ON

GO B

GO BACK

HANG ON

I NEED TO GO LOOK AT THESE IMAGES REAL QUICK BECAUSE OH MY GOOODNESS PLS

PRINCESS IRON FAN WAS A CELESITAL????

I DON’T REMEMBER THIS IN JTTW AM I LOSING MY TOUCH??

ALSO WAIT THAT’S SO GREAT FOR HER AND DBK’S RELATIONSHIP PLS

THAT’S SO GREAT HELPGMLSDKFAMWE

NEZHA, ERLANG SHANG IT LOOKS LIKE AND IRON FAN WHY IS THAT GETTING TO ME PLS HGSLDFJWE

OFC

OFC DBK FELL FOR PRINCESS IRON FAN MID BATTLE

I LOVE THAT

Gives new meaning to when he’s yelling about how his wife beat up anybody in the revenge of the spider queen season 2 special UJGL;SAJFA;EFMASDF HE’S FOUGHT HER HE KNOWS I LOVE THATHGSDFKMLSDF

Y’know

Y’know Azure

Y’know its funny how

You seem to be the driving force behind a lot of what Monkey King ends up doing in this

You call yourself a follower but you and the group are the ones pushing for this stuff

Also wow this dude really

had an image of what he wanted

very interesting

WUKONG AND MACAQUE VIBIN FIGHTING YEAH GOOD FOR YOU TWO MACAQUE LOOKS LIKE HE’S HAVING FUN HGSDKFLAEFW

HEY AS LONG AS HE’S WITH HIS BFF RIGHT

:’D

…

……….

………………

hang on

gimme a second

w h a t

hold up hang on gimme a second

what

okay so i see

they didn’t want to

bring Buddha into it so they’re making monkey king… f…ail??? against… the Jade Emperor… who he didn’t… fight?? In jttw if I’m recalling correctly…

okay interesting interesting not sure how i feel about that interesting did he even actually pick a fight buddha in this or is that just a throwaway reference line from the first season?

heck hang on not sure how i’m feeling about this i need another sec

I AM LITERALLY ONLY FOUR MINUTES IN COME ON

kay so

“Monkey king failed” uhuh, that’s cute, why’d you hype up a little monkey guy to lead a battle and go fight your boss huh?

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

NNNNNNNNOT SURE HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS APPROACH IF THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED

Cause like, Monkey King’s whole thing is that nobody could really touch him, he doesn’t really fail and that’s what makes him such a huge problem for heaven in jttw, he just keeps getting bigger and more annoying until Buddha has to step in and slap five stacked mountain on top of him

hmmmmm, the further we get into this actually the more suspicious i’m getting of the approach they’re taking on monkey kings character

I’m all for reimagining and new gen monkey Mk now i’m on board with that cause they did it really neat and i love how it feels but like…. Sun Wukong means a lot to me as a character and a lot to a lot of people as more than that, and I thought they were doing pretty good with it but i’m kindaaaa hmmmmmmmmm

HMMMM

I dunno man ig I gotta hold my final thoughts on that till I at least finish the ep here but hGJSDFKLSADF

WE’LL SEE HOW I FEEL

pressing play

WHEEZINGSDLKF

I LOVE HOW THIS

TINY GROUP OF FOUR + MONKEY KING THOUGHT THEY COULD TAKE DOWN HEAVEN

pointing and laughing at Azure

WOW ITS INTERESTING HOW IF THEY MAKE MONKEY KING NOT ACTUALLY AS STRONG IN THIS IT MEANS EVERYONE IS LITERALLY CONSTANTLY PUTTING HIM ON A PEDESTAL AT ALL TIMES EXPECTING MORE FROM HIM THAN WHAT HE CAN GIVE AND PUNSHING HIM WHEN HE DOESN’T MEET THEIR EXPECTATIONS WOWWWW INTERESTING

swk now

yeilded to the

okay so no Buddha then

hMMMMMMMMMMMM

H M

I DUNNO GUYS

NOT SURE HOW I’M FEELING ABOUT THIS

Also interesting how its kinda being portrayed as one after another, like… did the mountain even happen??? was there no mountain?? guys if there was no mountain i’m like… i’m actually gonna be upset that’s such a huge part of his backstory over 500 years under it and they’re just gonna… take that out???

tsk

I dunno guys not sure how i feel about this

Okay so

they got away scott free??

Monkey King gets the circlet slapped on and these guys just get dropped back down like they’re not a problem?? like Azure didn’t used to be one of them? if anything he should have gotten an extra harsh slap on the wrist in the form of like, death and reincarnation like straight up

hm.

So there is the chance of like, unreliable narrator still here I’m just…

if this is it, i’m not sure if I’m happy with it, i’m kinda… really disappointed? Like. yeah i don’t know

what the heck is this????

okay so they made a house

wowww

a house

dang

cool

looking so happy with each other

totally abandoning monkey king

who did all that for you

wowwww

Well first off no respect for these losers

and second off NOT SURE IF I LIKE THIS PLOT

OHHH WAIT THAT’S FUN THO

Okay hang on

lol

ur telling me

you tried to overthrow the literal heavens

and got away no problem

but you build a house and now its a problem

this is…

this kinda feels like poor storytelllinnngggg mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

I’m really hoping this is the unreliable narrator thing and not the actual thing they’re going with on this show cause if it is I’m kinda out

hm I don’t want to be out this show means a lot to me though

Kay well, obvious Azure at least is painting Wukong as becoming the villain of the story, oh he let this happen, or he gave himself up, oh he failed us blah blah blah, no buddy you failed him, you got him involved in something he never needed to be involved in and wow okay hang on if this is the story they’re going with this really means Wukong seriously is just a silly goofy guy. No murder, no antagonist arch, no super powerful chaos monkey, just a guy who loves his friends so much he’d do anything for them, and Azure used that and abandoned him and then he got a circlet slapped on him, tortured into doing what the celestials wanted and now Azure’s acting like he’s the bad guy

yeeeeeesh

this is rough times for the monkey

still not sure i like it, bUT MOVING ON

WELL OKAY AZURE SURE YOU GOT IMPRISONED IG BUT AT LEAST HE DIDN’T KILL YOU

well ig Tang Monk wouldn’t really be on board with that but whatever

Sheesh though this Monkey King has it… really rough. Like, JTTW Monkey King, a lot of what happens is his own pride and a bit of ignorance making it possible. And like, everyone assuming things about him right off the bat and people exaggerating his crimes to the Jade emperor at times, but this Monkey King seems to have had everyone ever close to him abuse him, use him, and abandon him the moment he fails them like dang

No wonder he has communication issues

are you kidding me we’re only five minutes in I don’t have enough braincells for thisGL;KAMEF

Peng fr like don’t even my guy it ain’t worth it- BOI YOU AIN'T WORTH IT

Also bruh why you trying so hard to convince Mk of this?

SNORTS

WHEEZES

POINTS AND LAUGHS

“he took the only friends he had from me” Bro you took his life from him, made him a target of the celestials, he was just chilling

boy man if this is the real plot point Azure lion SUCKS bIG time

OH WOW

STILL

USING PEOPLE HUH AZURE

STILL

GASLIGHTING THEM INTO DOING YOUR DIRTY WORK HUH

LOOKS ALL OPEN AND HAPPY

AND HJIS FRIENDS LOOK READY TO MURDER

ALSO BRUH MK’S FACE JUST

yeesh man this is a rough episode holy moly

oh yeah no i hate his guts y’all

ready to punch his face

gosh dang it i was so ready for Wukong to have a real good friend moment but I JUST HAD TO BE RIGHT IG

Yeah Sandy on the ground very hurt

just mHMM

“EtErNaLy gRaTeFuL” sure buddy

SNORTS

LAUGHS

OH SURE BUDDY

AND HOW DO YOU PLAN ON TAKING DOWN THE CELESTIAL REALM JUST YOU THREE WHEN YOU COULDN’T EVEN DO IT WITH MONKEY KING- ohhhh the ink stuff right? right? the scroll? that’s a good weapon for that possibly

also heck bro this dude S U C K S

oh well that’s sweet at least

“until this is over”

at least sort of implies he intends to let him out after

the whole “better to ask forgiveness then permission” way of thinking ig

oh I’ll just do what i want to and use who i need to and they’ll forgive me when its all over and they’ll see what i wanted was right all along! :D

WOW WHAT A GREAT VILLIAIN MOMENT ACTUALLY NICELY DONE

HANDSHAKE YEAH

ENOUGH PEOPLE HAVE USED THE MONKEYS

BUT ALSO MK PLS I’M SO WORRIED FOR YOUR SAFETY NOW

DARN FREAKING RIGHT YOU GIVE HIM BACK HIS MOTHERFREAKING MENTOR YOU PIECE OF GARBAGE LION BAG

Oh actually i’m kinda hype over Mk losing it cause Monkey Kings in trouble, we usually imagine like, Wukong going berserk for Mk but if Mk’s allowed to go bananas (stereotypical monkey pun intended) then I’m gonna really happy, I dunno if Wukong’s ever had someone going berserk for him before that’s nice ;-;

“What is this child?” THE GUY WHOS ABOUT TO KICK YOUR WISECRACK

“CaReFuL bOy mY pAtIenCe iS nOt EnDlEsS”

sorry I’m very salty rn HNGLKSADJFAWENF

;-;

oh man dude actually this kid

has big major abandonment issues heck

people just keep taking his mentor from him heck, yeah and his friends, heck

ACTUALLY YEAH HUGE FAN OF

MK SAYING NO TO THAT

AIN’T NO GETTING PUSHED AROUND ALTHOUGH I HAVEN’T SEEN HOW THIS ACTUAL FIGHT WILL GO JUST GIVE HIM BACK HIS FREAKING MENTOR THAT’S HIS SHIFU WHO MEANS SO MUCH TO HIM AND JUST CAUSE YOU APPARENTLY ABANDONED MONKEY KING DOESN’T MEAN HE WILL SO STEP ASIDE OLD MAN

Actually I’d love to see Monkey King at least get emotional over Mk fighting that hard for him y’know? like dang must feel nice to be… not exactly needed but wanted like that, like I’d take on whoever i needed to to get you back, Wukong’s done that for so many people its neat to have it done back to him

okay I wasn’t sure i liked the whole backstory change a bit but ngl the way its playing out so far ain’t too bad Monkie Kid may change a lot of things but what they do change they handle fairly well usually STILL GONNA WAIT TILL THE END OF EP AT LEAST FOR FINAL FEEDBACK

ONWARD TO POSSIBLY VERY SHORT BATTLE BUT MY GOSH I HOPE ITS LONGER AND MK IS ACTUALLY A THREAT TO THEM DESPERATELY OH THEY’RE PROBBALY GONNA COMPARE HIM TO MONKEY KING OR SOEMTHIGN HECK

Well

Y’know

okay well first of all HAHAHAHAH FAST MONKEY FAST MONKEY DARK RIGHT HECK YOU AZURE HOW’S THAT FOR SPEED YOU ACTUALLY LOOKED STARTLED MWAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

And Secondly he actually seems… I don’t know if he’s concerned monkey king will get out or concerned for Monkey king in general cause he does seem kinda worried heck Y’know bro friend who cares but is still horrible to you but uses caring as an excuse for that is such a neat story thing y’know?? like?? heck dude

ALRIGHT I AM OVERANALYZING THE CRAP OUT OF THIS EP ITS BEEN A WHILE SINCE I’VE GONE THIS IN DEPTH WE’RE ONLY SIX MINTUES IN PROPS TO YOU IF YOU MAKE IT TO THE END OF WHATEVER THE HECK THIS RAMBLE IS

AHAHAHA

MK FINE

JUST

DONT’ EVEN SEE HIM DOWN

HE’S A FAST LAD I AM A BIG FAN OF THIS

HE’S SO FAST MY GODS

CANT’ TOUCH THIS

DOO DOO DA DOOOO DA DO DA DO

CANT’ TOUCH THIS

Kay sorry I need to go back and re-watch all that speed frame by frame hang on

My gosh is Mk powerful

Well, Y’know its nice how close the brotherhood is, minus Wukong and Macaque ig

wonder how long that’ll last

heck man Mk doesn’t even crash into anything or fall when he gets punched back by Peng he just stops and is covered by dust, standing there, this dude is HYPE

;-; heck

monkey mk ;-;

he’s beautiful ;-;

I love how they had Mei attack Azure first to like, have something to compare Mk’s speed to, like making Azure out to be super fast, and then Mk swoops in and the dude hasn’t landed a hit yet

the scrolls gonna break isn’t it

OH WELL

lets see

MK’S GOOD HECK

TRIPS THAT MAN VERY WELL WITH A SWEEPING LEG KICK SPINNY THING CROUCHED DOWN HE’S AWESOME I’M LOVING THIS

HOW’D HE GET UP IN THE SKY

WHEEZING

WOWWWW

THIS GUYS

AFRAID OF MONKEY KING HUH

Y’know I think it says a lot how he envisions him now

Like flashing from Mk to monkey king there

hang on i need to go look at shadowplay really quick

yeah

huh

interesting

wait i need to check the winning side too hang on

HUH

INTERESTING

Well they both kinda see Wukong as detached emotionally and cold, but Azure sees him with the circlet on and Macaque sees him decked out in armour with no circlet

I’m not sure if that means anything I’m just kinda fascinated by that.

Bruh sure does look at least, some sort of panicked seeing him tho that sure is something hmhm

HECK

okay i’m feeling better about this

apparently might not have mountain trauma but he got free relationship trauma and Azure did too it seems I’d love for him to be in denial and secretly blaming himself for all of it that would be AWESOME i doubt that’ll be it but i’m just MHMHMHM FUN TIMES

ALSO HA CALLED IT

SCROLL BROKEN

hmmm

HMMMM

So I’m p sure this means inky’s getting out at least and destroying stuff

But does this means Wukongs semi-permanently trapped?

Also Azure doesn’t like to take responsibility for things so i’m waiting for the “look what you’ve done Mk” or “look what you made me do” from him hGL;SAJDF

GOOD JOB JERKFACE

YOU TRAPPED YOUR BRO IN THE SCROLL BECAUSE YOU PANICKED IN THE FACE OF A LITTLE MONKEY GOOD JOB

Also heck imagine Mk monkey fighting after he’s stopped glitching

Get away from our monkey man ;-;

oh yeah

Wukong’s trapped in there now huh

Even Peng looks

yeah

heck okay then

Well I will simply be devastated if Wukong isn’t freed in the special, I assume we won’t be seeing him until at least then

HECK WHY DO I DESPERATELY WANT MACAQUE BACK AND TELLING MK AZURE’S FULL OF CRAP

“tHiS iSn’T wHaT i wAnTeD”

tough buddy it’s your fault

ha ha

“what you’ve done” THERE IT ISSSSSS

BLAMING MK

THE KID IS LITERALLY JUST SO TRUAMATIZED AND WANTS HIS SHIFU BACK HECK MK REALLY GOING THROUGH IT

Azure really sad about that huh

WELL GOOD LOSER

I HOPE YOU FEEL TERRIBLE

I HOPE YOU WALLOW IN YOUR GUILT AND SHAME FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE

But he’s the type of dude it seems who will always find somebody else to blame i NEED TO STOP ANYLZING THE CHARACTERS SO MUCH HECK GHSDLFJAEO;F M

WEAPONS SNATCHED

HELP????

i’M GLFKSDFASDF

THIS IS FUNNY TO ME FOR SOME REASON

THEY’RE ALL SO DOWN IN THE DUMPS ABOUT THIS

THIS IS YOUR FAULTS YOU FOOLS

THEY’VE BEEN BLAMING WUKONG FOR SO LONG NOW THAT THEY BASICALLY KILLED HIM THEY’RE HAVING A MOMENT BUT HEY THERE’S AN ESCAPE GOAT FOR BLAME RIGHT THERE RIGHT?

W O W

HIS LEGACY WILL LIVE ON IN OUR VICTORY

1. MK’S HIS LEGACY WATCH YOUR MOUTH

2. YOU SUCK, WATCH YOUR MOUTH

3. WATCH YOUR MOUTH OLD MAN

YOU LITERALLY JUST TRAPEPD WUKONG FOREVER IN HIS HIS NIGHTMARE AND ARE STILL BLAMING HIM

UNBELIVABLE

HATE THIS GUY

BRING BACK MACAQUE

AT LEAST HE WAS FUNNY TO WATCH BE A TRAINWRECK

HE SUUCKKSSSSSS

HEY GIVE BACK THE SCROLL PIECE

STUPID MOTHERFREAING LION

TAKING WUKONG AGAIN

THIS IS SO STUPID HECK

okay i’m fine i knew i should have waited an extra day i got too hypebNG;LKAWMEF

Okay so heck dude bro man Azure you ain’t nothing, acting all high and mighty like this all ain’t your fault and your responsibility unbelievable DANG

reusing lots of animation for this bit here nods nods excellent work 10/10 being genuine I love to see animation getting reused and reanimated its really nice and its good to now the animators aren’t dying every single episode i appreciate ALL OF THEIR GOSH DANG WORK HECK

Also heck Mk self blaming galore even with Mei trying to pull him out of it cause he fr is in his own head a bit and HECK, YEAH THE LADY BONE DEMONS WORDS ARE REALLY GONNA HAUNT HIM FOREVER HUH

MAAAN

DADSY FOR THE WIN STEPPING IN ;-;

heck guys Pigsy is #1 guy in this show i swear

HECK DUDE MK FINALLY JUST SAYING THAT LIKE

OH MAN THAT LINE THO

THE YOU HAVE SCARY DEMON ANCESTORS? THAT JUST MEANS YOU AHVE FAMILY

DUDE BRO MY GUY PLS |;A;/

PIGSY I’M COUNTING ON YOU, YOU GOTTA BE THE ONE TO SAY YOU’RE FAMILY PLEEEAAASEEEE HE REALLY NEEDS THAT RIGHT NOWWWW

oh man am I mentally ill about this show i haven’t written or even thought this many words in weeks heck

PIGSY’S SIGH

AND I DON’T HAVE ANYTHING

AND HECK

MK PLS YOU COME FROM THE SAME STONE MONKEY KING CAME FROM

YOU’RE SORT OF FAMILY

WHATEVER OR HOWEVER THAT ENTAILS

DON’T NEED A LABEL ON IT BUT YOU ARE

GUESS THAT’S NOT VERY COMFORTING RN CAUSE HE’S GONE THOUGH

PIGSYYY PLSSSSSS

MK NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

OH MAN THIS IS AN MK UP AND LEAVES EP

NOOOOOOO

ISNT IT?

HE’S GONNA FLYU OFF???

oh you know what would be funny if he used the cloud for the first time to fly away that’d be hilarious HGSALFJEAKWEMF

okay tHO PLS

I NEED PIGSY TO SAY THEY’RE FMAILY THIS SEASON

THE SPECIAL

WHENEVER

JUST THIS SEASON PLS I BEG OF YOU

MK NEEDS THAT IT’D BE GREAT MY BRAIN NEEDS THAT DESPERATELYGSDNFAKMEF

WHEEZING

HEY MEI

NOW YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS

WHEEZINGLSDKMF

I’M MOSTLY JOKING I’M JUST

THAT’S SO FUNNY

YEAH FLYING OFF BECAUSE YOU THINK YOU’RE GONNA HURT YOUR FRIENDS

NODS NODS MK WAS BOUND TO HIT THAT ARC TOO

TOO BAD HE DOES’T HAVE A RED SON FOR MONKEY STUFF

wait

oh ha

HAHAHHAHAHA

HE’S GONNA GO TO MACAQUE ISN’T HE

HE IS

I KNOW HE IS

RUN INTO HIM OR GO SEE HIM HE TOTALLY IS

HEAR ME OUT HE’S THE ONLY MONKEY MK KNOWS LEFT

HE CAN’T GO TO MONKEY KING

AND MACAQUE ISN’T CLOSE TO HIM AND HE DOESN’T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT REALLY HURTING HIIM

OKAY I KNOW THIS PROBABLY WON’T HAPPEN BUT I DESPERATELY WANT MK TO REACCOUNT AZURES STORY AND HAVE MACAQUE GO “well that’s not what happened-“ JUST SO WE GET TWO UNRELIABLE NARRATORS CLASHING AND THE ONLY THING THEY CAN AGREE ON IS MONKEY KING DO NOT GO BRRR, BUT IN OPPOSITE WAYS SO THEY CAN’T BOTH BE TRUE AT THE SAME TIME AND BOTH OF THEM ARE WRONG OR SOMETHING EITHER WAY I JUST WANT MACAQUE TO BASH AZURE LIKE EVERYHTING WAS FINE BEFORE HE SHOWED UP I WOULD LOVE THAT

Okay back to Mk sad and running away

Oh okay no cloud fair hGL;KASJFAWEF

FLYING AWAY INSTEAD THAT WORKS

OFF HE GOES

… Yeah ig they cant’ follow him lol

WAIT DID THEY TAKE MEI’S SWORD TOO?? SHE MADE THAT FROM SCRATCHGHSLDKFS

i don’t think they did I just don’t see it on her hgl;fjsdlf

SCREAMS LAUHGING

OH MY GODS PARALLELSSSSSSSSS

THAT’S SO GOOOOD

LETS GOOOOO

PARALLELSSSSSSSSSSS

BIG FAN BIG FAN

I took like a ten minute pause there’s still like two minutes left I needed a sec HGKLDSAFJAOWEF

THE PARALLELS WITH SAMADHI FIRE MEI LEAVING AND MONKEY MK LEAVING IS SO GOOD

I’M SO EXCITED ABOUT THAT HECK

Also Samdhi fire right, I’m told the crew confirmed it’s gone bUT HECK COULD YOU IMAGINE IF MEI STILL HAD IT?? ig she would be mega powerful then and could just roast the ink (which i’m surprised hasn’t gotten out???? I really thought it would maybe later-) or just roast Azure- I see why the took it yup, Azure would be crisp lion right now if they hadn’t but MAN I would’ve loved if she still kept at least one piece of it, y’know? Cause its always been a part of her, she’d feel so cold and empty without it I swear, SHE STILL HAS ONE PIECE OF IT IN MY HEART, also just saying ohh nooooo she can’t use it or the scroll would burn up noooooo woulda been a good excuse for while they were in the scroll but now that they’re out already… yeah not sure how they could have done it otherwise but MAN I MISS THE RINGS

OKAY LETS

HECK LETS FINISH THE ONE MINUTE WE GOT LEFT HECK

ONE MINUTE IS SO LONG THIS EPISODE I’VE BEEN HERE FOR LIKE THREE HOURS YOU GUYS I’M NOT EVEN KIDDING

SCREAMS

PIGSY

SIR

THE FACE I JUST MADE

I AM IN AGONY

YOU COULD HAVE SAID THAT BEFORE HE LEFT

SCREAMS

OH IT HIS WITH THE

EHCK

I’M FIEN

YOU NEED TO SAY THAT TOO HIM OLD MAN

YOU AMAZING WONDERFUL BEAUTIFUL GRUMPY OLD MAN

“Doesn’t that moron know we’re his family” NO

NO HE DOESN’T

YOU NEVER SAID IT

YOU NEVER SAY IT PIGSY YOU SAY IT IN FOOD BUT HE NEEDS WORDS |;A;/

YOU EVEN SAID YOU WERENT HIS DAD PLEASE

I NEED

HECK YOU GUYS I NEED SO MUCH MORE DADSY CONTENT I NEED TO MAKE IT SO IT CATERS TO EXACTLY WHAT I WANT LIKE THIS SHOW DOES HECK EHCK HECK

PIGSY CRYING TOO

IS THAT A FIRST?

THATS A FIRST

HE’S TEARED UP BEFORE AND CRIED FOR A JOKE IN THE SHOW BUT THAT?? I DON’T KNOW IF WE’VE EVER SEEN THAT AND I AM MENTALLY UNWELL

HELPGMLDFMASDF

Reassuring hands on shoulders, gotta comfort the dad in the room

Sandy: dw he’s just hitting monkey puberty Everyone:

SANDY PLS HGL;KSJFASDF

WELL OKAY

SO MUCH FOR GOING AFTER HIM

DANG

DID THEY GET SNATCHED TO THE CELESTIAL REALM?

ITS BLUE

SUMMONED BY AZURE OR BY

THE JADE EMPORER HIMSELF

OR MAYBE THE GREATEST MASTER OF ALL TIME (his words not mine) OR MAYBE DRAGON KING??

HECK WHY AM I GUESSING I CAN JUST WATCH IT HGS,D;FSADF

AHA CALLED IT

OLD MAN MASTER

SHIFU SUPREME

ANTI-ADHD HYPERACTIVEITY CANCELING GREATEST MASTER OF ALL TIME

WHATS UP MY GUY

ALSO HECK BRO WHY’D YOU SNATCH THEM MK NEEDS THEM RIGHT NOW

SCREAMS

HE NEEDS HIS FAMILYYYYYYAAAAAAAA

ALSO HECK DUDE WE LOVE FOUND FAMILY THAT CALLS ITSELF WHAT IT IS ACTUALLY

BIG FAN OF PIGSY CALLING THEM MK’S FAMILY IT HITS SO HARD COMING FROM HIM

NOW TELL MK THAT YOU OLD DELIGHTFUL MAN

HELPGMLKMSD

MEI FR LIKE WHAT NOW I AM SO DONE WITH EVERYONE

bros you ever shush somebodyy so hard their facial features go upside downNG;AKLMFAEWF

BRUH REALLY WENT

WELP WHILE THE LITTLE MAN FIGURES IT OUT LETS GET YOU GUYS SOME MAD SKILLS INSTEAD OF EMOTIONAL STABILITY

THANKS MASTER

THANKS

TRAINING IS SUCH A GOOD IDEA BUT HECK

OKAY

MY GODS

THAT TOOK ME SO LONG TO WATCH HECK

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I REALLY ZONE IN ON STUFF HECK

THAT WAS SO MUCH

I’M SO READY TO FISTFIGHT AZURE YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA

WHAT A GUY

SAYIGN ALL THE RIGHT THINGS

BUT ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS YOU POMPUS BALL OF FUZZ

okay heck before i

heck that was a lot holy crap

godspeed if you’ve made it this far nothing but respect for you guys that read through all this

OKAY

somehow monkie kid does plot lines that i go “oh i hope they don’t do that” but when they do they handle it so well that I just end up loving it anyway absolutely insane

STIIIILLLLL not totally sure i’m a fan of what they’ve done with Wukongs backstory but ig we still don’t have all the pieces, but heck dude Wukong really is just some guy in this if what i think is happening is happening. Just a silly goofy guy doing his best, maybe a few shenanigans, gets in with the wrong crowd who hype him into doing something terrible and put him on a pedestal and then he falls and they blame him for it and nobody catches him

looks at Macaque

unless-

Look man all I’m saying is he seemed pretty dedicated he had to have at least done SOMETHING else

heck I am a jumble of thoughts rn can’t get my head straight heck heck

heck okay well

very much enjoyed that episode

Was filled with rage

no one since Macaque in ses 1 and 2 (and a little bit 3 ig) has filled me with such rage I hope Azure walks into a wall

heck that was so much

my brain feels fried

i don’t think i’ve drank anything since this morning heck

how the heck are they gonna do thisGLKASMDF

I MISS WUKONG

I’M SO GLAD WE GOT TO SEE HIM ONCE

I JUST

HECK

I HOPE WE GET HIM BACK IN THE SPECIAL CAUSE I KNOW WE AIN’T GETTING HIM BACK IN THE EPS THAT WOULD BE TOO SOON

BUT IF HE ISN’T BACK UNTIL NEXT SEASON I WILL BE IN AGONY

M AN

WHAT DO I EVEN SAY AFTER ALL THAT THERE’S SO MUCH

STILL NOT SURE HOW I FEEL

GENUINELY THE MOUNTAIN IS SUCH A HUGE PART OF WUKONGS TRUAMA IF THEY TAKE THAT AWAY HE REALLY IS JUST

HECK HE’S JUST A DUDE

HE’S JUST A SILLY DUDE WHO WANTED TO HAVE FUN WITH HIS FRIENDS IN MONKIE KID THAT’S INSANE

Its okay Wukong, we’ve replaced your mountain trauma with a mountain of betrayal abuse and being used by the people you care about most trauma!

ALSO AZURE’S WHOLE MOTTO REALLY IS ASK FOR FORGIVENESS LATER TAKE WHAT YOU WANT NOW HUH

HUGE FAN OF HIM PANICKING LASHING OUT AND HURTING THE ONE PERSON HE CLAIMS MEANS EVERYHTING TO HIM, HUGE FAN OF HOW DEVESTATED HE WAS THAT HIS TERRIBLE PLAN AND AWFUL ACTIONS LEAD TO THAT BUT ALSO HATE HIM FOR HOW QUICK HE RECOVERED WHAT ARE YOU MAD ABOUT LOSER THIS IS YOUR FAULT

LIKE HECK IS HE THE ONE WHO PUT THE SCROLL IN WUKONGS PLACE??? DID WUKONG EVEN KNOW ABOUT IT???

WAS HE GUARDING IT??

MORE QUESTIONS THAN ANSWERS YET AGAIN

GOTTA LOVE THIS SHOW

KAY FINAL THOUGHTS LETS WRAP THIS UP BEFORE I GO INSANE

Still not quite sure how I feel about their approach to Wukong I love it because it makes sense for his LMK character but I also hate it because it takes away the part of him that makes him complex and reduces him down to like 90% of what he does being because someone else told him to do it rather than his own pride and desire for things and peoples issues with him, but that also is part of what makes it fit with this Wukong, glad they at least kept the circlet, don’t like how quick he came around to accepting it, unless someone threatened to kill his bros if he didn’t so he agreed to it to save their lives and THATS why Azure and the others got away scott free no problem, and then by then he experienced the power of the circlet so he had no choice but to seal them away, or he got bitter heck i don’t know Wukong’s character feels like its getting such a short end of the stick rn and I love it but hate it but like it but dislike it but HECK ITS JUST SO SLIGHTLY TO THE LEFT ITS THROWING ME OFF BUT THEY HANDLED IT REALLY WELL, IF ANYONE ELSE TRIED THIS I’D CRINGE BUT MONKIE KID HAS SUCH GOOD WRITERS AND ANIMATION THEY MAKE IT WORK SOMEHOW AND I’M OFFENDED BY IT HGBDFSFASF HECK DUDE

I’M SO CONFLICTED

I adore Azure’s characterization though, he’s so funky and so in denial and I actually can’t wait to see what happens with him and if he turns on his other bros, cause a plot line with them seeing he’s kinda insane would be DOPE Wise old elephant can’t follow a lunatic for long right? How he treats Mk is very interesting because he does seem to see him like a nephew of some kind or at least thinks he should care about him, hence the “mercy” and focusing only on him rather than, like, Mei, who’s much more thrilled and looked up to him for a bit there. Cause Mk’s Wukong’s student so that makes him important to Azure. HE’S SO STRANGE AND WEIRD AND FUNKY I HATE LIKE HIM HE’S GREAT I HOPE HE TRIPS ON A CHAIR HECK HE’S LIKE IF MACAQUE WAS SELF RIGHTEOUS AND BUFF OR SOEMTHIGN But dang he’s so interesting I want him obliterated I WANT WUKONG TO LAUNCH HIM INTO THE SUN AND SPEAKING OF WHICH

MK LOSING OVER WANTING WUKONG BACK GIVE ME BACK MY SHIFU IS EVERYTHIGN TO ME, like I so desperately want Wukong having an “i never wanted this for you, I tried to keep things from you so this wouldn’t happen” moment with Mk because man did that monkey try hard to keep Mk away from the stuff that would do to him what everything that happened did to Wukong- HECK HE’S JUST SOME GUY IN MONKIE KID YOU GUYS, LIKE HE AIN’T THE OLD MAFIA BOSS OR OLD DEMON HE’S JUST SOME MONKEY GUY WHO LOVED THE MONKEYS HE RULED OVER, LOVED THE PEOPLE WHO CALLED THEMSELVES HIS BROHTERS AND LIKE HECK DUDE I DON’T KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT THAT EITHER BUT THIS IS A WHOLE NEW AVENUE FOR ANGST THAT I HAVEN’T EXPLORED YET AND ACTUALLY I’M PRETTY STOKED FOR THAT

Pigsy will forever be my number 1, I am never gonna recover from whatever the heck this was, wish me luck processing NOW I KNOW WHY EVERYONE WAS HYPING SEASON EIGHT

OKAY I HAVE MORE THOUGHTS BUT WE’LL BE HERE ALL DAY IF I CONTINUE AND IT’S ALREADY BEEN THREE FREAKING HOURS SO KNOX OUT I’M GONNA GO STICK MY HEAD IN A SNOWBANK

#knox reacts #monkie kid season 4 #lmk s4 spoilers #ig not really spoilers anymore its been ages so i'll stop tagging after this i think #the reaction bit at the top should warn enough that they'll be spoilers if you haven't seen it #ALTHOUGH I HAD CONFLICTED MOMENTS DURING THIS ONE TO BE CLEAR I DID VERY MUCH ENJOY THIS #I AM VERY MUCH HAVING A MOMENT AND PERMANANTLY WORRIED FOR WUKONG AT ALL TIMES #HECK CAN'T WAIT FOR NEXT WEEK TO WATCH ANOTHER ONE IN THE MEANTIME PROCESSING AND EMOTIONS #THIS ISNT' EVEN THE EP BEFORE THE SPECIAL SO I'M #HECK DUDE #THIS SEASON IS GONNA DESTROY ME

49 notes · View notes

hasarjunadoneanythingwrong · 2 years ago

Note

*PATIENTLY WAITS FOR THE INDIAN LOSTBELT KING REWRITE FOR YOU*

Concepts I’ve thought about

-theme of lostbelt focusing on ‘guilt and memory’ but like this time more obvious

-something something instead of it being ‘just’ the lokapala arjuna alter is unconsciously trying to recreate his own siblings/family with them, though this means instead of kubera/nezha the ashwins would be used possible w a twin servant, or they’d be moved over to asclepius and someone else would get yama

-lb appears to be stuck in the time right b4 the kurukhestra war, cycling over and over in an effort to ‘prevent’ it despite it already in f having

-ashwatthama actively chooses to join arjuna alters side? Instead of the torture thing, as an exploration/continuation of the theme of ‘guilt,’ deciding to side with the people he hurt even if they’re now in the wrong as well out of a desperate attempt to try and right something that could never be fixed out of a nostalgia for a relationship long lost

-parallels between lakshmi bai giving up her life for her country and the youth of hastinapur giving up theirs for theirs? Idk I just feel like some line could’ve been done. Especially bc she also left a young child behind

-karna being forced to confront what ‘good intentions poor execution’ truly means as he witnesses people he knew and respected become warped beyond recognition, being forced to acknowledge his own role in enabling the conflict, once again having to come to terms with his tendency to enable and prioritize his pride and own desires over his common sense

-by which i mean I’ve considered subbing out karna alter over douman just bc it would be funny to have the more og text canon warhawk karna see some fucked up arjuna and be like ‘hey you should keep doing that :)’ while his lancer version is in the bg like ‘bruh’

- focus on the repetitive nature of the cycles, how and why they were reset, what that meant for arjuna alter’s psyche. Really hammer in the increasing isolation and disconnect, and the growing agitation as the inherent nature of humans prevented a world with no conflict no matter what he did or how hard he tried. Talk about what happened to his family and the other gods, and the thousands of years ago. Do a this chair monologue idk something

-parallels between arjuna alter and Asha as people who’s families were torn apart, who struggle to conceptualize their grief as they can’t even remember it. Let them talk at some point.

-look if rama comes into the lostbelt asking about his wife you can at least superimpose her sprite in the sky at the end after arjuna alter dies and have her be like ‘cool I’m not mixed w 400 other gods now. Sorry I can’t hang love you bby xoxo’ like cmon

- I want to see arjuna alter get MAD. Make him cry and scream about how unfair it all is it’s bullshit that it was karna. I want him to rail again the unfairness of having to kill your kin, of how no matter how much you destroy it will never create peace, of how the world he was in was destined to head to a bloody war, just SOMETHING

-let us run koyanskya over w the shadowborder. For fun

-if we have to endure kiara’s 400 hour buddhism monologue then can’t rama explain some like, basic aspects of Hindu theology to us. Why hasn’t that happened yet. Huh?

- you know how the boss fights from Greece-> onwards have their name in that countries’s script? Yeah something in like Sanskrit for here pls

-let us have an actual dialogue w arjuna alter

-let us actually see douman and arjuna alter interact.

-idk fuckin uhhh if Krishna was the guy who allegedly junao was able to absorb everyone through can we like. See what his deal is? In a flashback? Please?

-mention gilgamesh flies his vimana wrong for me. personally

-have a third party who knew arjuna who isn’t karna/ashwa/biased there to talk about what he was like. Idk Bhisma drona someone just let us see more facets of him so we can understand how he got to this state

-hammer in the memory issues. Hammer in the fact arjuna alter’s body is breaking down around him, held together only by force of will. Hammer in the fact he is willing to die to try and save everyone. Really get that beaten in there.

-for me personally given that hindusim features reincarnation heavily it would be nice to at least acknowledge most of the people deleted are probably reentering the samsara (only enlightened people exit the cycle which a flawed being can’t be). He hasn’t necessarily abandoned these people even if he’s treating them wrong.

#my asks #writing #I can’t write this is just random mostly unrelated stuff I’ve thought of #if any actual writers want to take any of these go right ahead #I want to come back to this and add things later this is just some of it #ref

36 notes · View notes

wench-and-jezebel · 1 year ago

Text

Red, White, and Royal Blue Reaction:

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) and Wench (@scripted-downfall) react

J: Whooooop whooooop!

W: And now we begin the film that has had my react partner cheating on me for a week I mean what

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️ No, no, is true. This has been my whole personality

W: Believe me, I'm aware

– – –

J: Not Alex “yucking her yum” over this wedding

W: Translation: "I'm smitten, Nora, dear, and utterly annoyed about it"

J: Bea!!

J: Alex buddy just say you have a crush

W: To be fair, his criticisms aren't like they were in the book. They're not ugh he's too perfect and gently chivalrous and I must poke anymore :(

J: Buddy #2 just say you have a crush

W: Bruh, what was that greeting, Alex?

J: Oh, boy. Oh, this will go well!

W: I'm preemptively cringing over this cake and what is about to happen

J: Right?

J: Men and their obsession with height

W: Henry looks so shell-shocked

J: Yes Alex that’s helping. Let’s just keep smearing it around 🤣🤣

W: Bruh, I hate Philip already

J: Right!?!

W: What would my family say if they knew I was watching this rn

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

W: That is also on the topic of bad reputations... as mine would be shot

J: Zahraaa

W: SARAH SHAHI, MY BELOVED

J: I have been trying to not think of it being connected to the book ☠️☠️ cause I know they’re gonna change stuff

W: lkasjdf not gallons of tea

J: I love Uma Thurman

W: White House pillow fights, hell yeah!

J: I LOVE ZAHRA

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️ ZAHRA you’ll regret saying sending Alex over soon, ma’am

W: Alex is gonna change his mind about David the dog real fast

J: “He is super cute” Ahh I love him

W: SHAAN! alksjdf;lkasjfd I love him

J: Oh god ☠️☠️ Henry: let me show him how cool I am! Zoom zoom

W: Brings out the good ol' Aston Martin

J: That smirk when he says "your wearing lifts"

W: You know. When I envisioned that scene, I assumed they were. actually competent at faking affection

W: … Once again. Once again. I thought they were supposed to be good at this.

J: ☠️☠️☠️ Whaaaat? You can’t tell they are so totally frien-

W: This poor man dealing with Alex's b.s.

J: "White blonde and British"?? What?!

W: BARBARA STREISAND? NOT BABS!!!

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️

W: Henry looks so scandalized

J: Oooop!

W: THE CLOSET SCENE

W: Bruh, they're starting the complimenting already

J: Ahhh I keep typing then getting distracted

W: I adore Henry, just btw. He's my chosen character in this

J: 😂😂😂

W: Despite the aesthetics, he's the burnt marshmallow, actually

J: Amyyyyy

W: It’s sad that they cut the Star Wars conversation

J: I knowww

W: "People kill to get into my New Year's party!" "That's perfect: they can kill me so I don't have to go!" I love it

J: Oooop!

J: Well he’s already gone for Alex

W: HEY, WAIT, I LOVE HIM! Clifton Collins, Jr.

J: Ooop 👀👀

W: My dude is flirting

J: Ooooop x2

W: Is this Liam, you think?

J: He said Miguel

W: I know. But there was no Miguel in the book. I'm saying, do you think he's standing in for Liam

J: Oh you mean just like supposed to be- yeah seems like it

J: Buddy using emoticons

W: alskdjf;laskjdflaksjdflkajdsf Those aren't emoticons; they're like. stickers, or whatever

J: Or no it’s Bitmojis! ☠️

W: I still love the "But we were ever so careful, dear" line. One of my favourites

J: I knowww lol

W: DORIAN GRAY IS SO GOOD

J: ☠️☠️☠️

W: NO, NOT HIM DISSOLVING INTO BUTTERFLIES! I'm going to cry in Hua-Cheng-coding

J: You mean the scene changing?

W: The butterflies

J: Oh!!

W: You'll figure it out when you finish the books.

J: Soooooon!!

J: Not the Turkey ☠️

(begin flashback to Wench's Discord conversation/reaction to RWaRB, the book!)

– – –

W: The turkeys ☠️ wtf are they being pardoned for??? I'm so confused

J: You didn’t know about this!?!?

W: No??

J: It’s a stupid af tradition the president pardons a Turkey on thanksgiving

W: ... wot. Why?

J: I have no idea

W: I'm looking this up *pulls up Wikipedia* *reads for five minutes* OH MY GOD THERE WAS A WHOLE RIVALRY

J: lol

W: This is actually really funny... not so much the pardoning bits, but what started it all. Basically, this dude Horace Vose started presenting dressed turkeys to the president , until some other dude decided that his turkey tasted better than Vose's and presented his own turkey instead. The prez then started receiving turkeys from literally EVERYONE, and this escalated to the point that Coolidge banned the practice... And then, the second he lifted it again, was flooded by turkeys, as well as an array of other animals, including a live racoon named Rebecca. Coolidge refused to eat her and named her a White House pet)

W: Okay, back to reading

Present-day W: (or, rather, watching!)

– – –

J: This scene is cute

W: Hey look, it's our dynamic! "What's x" "Look it up"

J: ☠️☠️☠️ ANYWAY. THIS IS CUTEEE

W: Man is a liar

J: that was the yesest nope ever

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️

W: “They wouldn’t [like him better] if they knew him” Liar x2

J: Right?! 😂

W: Henry is about to gay panic for three hours straight

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️ poor buddy!’

W: Fellas, is it gay to stare at your best-bro-pal-buddy's lips wrapped around a bottle?

J: I knowwwww

W: I love that the tie isn’t grey

J: PEZ

W: HELL YEAH

J: Ohhhhhhoooopp

W: Poor Henry looks so awkward when she sits on Alex

J: Oh god the flashbacks of school dances

W: I never went to any, so I am immune

J: OH GOD NOW THISSSS IS A FLASHBACK TO HS! THIS DAMN SOMG

W: This poor man

J: ☠️☠️☠️ hennnryyyyy

W: Poor Henry

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

W: Henry is legit me idk what you mean. Pop culture? Never heard of her? Dancing? Does English country dancing suffice? Non-80s-era pop music? What's that?

J: Here, yes, that's true... I still maintain Alex reminds me of you, though! Not to a T. Just qualities

W: You've still yet to point out... where. Or how. I still don't see it; you need to hurry up and explain

J: Like the over working himself

W: That's not exactly unique to him tho

J: I’ll explain after

W: Ugh, fineeee. Probably best; I’m getting behind on the transcript

J: Same! My brains can only do so much at once lol

J: Oh god Henry’s little smileee and then oooop 🥺 (And by little I mean it WAS covering his whole damn face)

W: I knowwwww

J: OPPPOPPPOOOPP

W: wtf was that, Jezebel?

J: Shut up

J: 👀👀👀👀👀 Henryyy 🥺🥺

W: Alex -> “Who would you be, if you were an anonymous person in the world" Henry-> "Gay"

J: ☠️

W: Sorry, I had to

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️ You should be sorry, I ficking almsot choked

J: ahhhhhhh

W: Man's boutta bolt so quickly

J: AGHHHHHH

W: Oof, or not, actually. That was decidedly not bolting. Alex had all the opportunity

J: 😂😂

W: And now Alex shall ghost him for a month while they're both gay panicking

W: OH THAT'S NOT FAIR! HE DOESN'T GET TO TEXT "ARE YOU ALIVE?" AFTER I JUST SAID HE WASN'T ME

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ Hahahahahaha! Thank you movie Alex

W: Shut up

J: 😂😂 oh shut up Nora you did not

W: She is exquisite

J: She is!!

W: What. tf. was that football vs. rugby thing

J: ☠️☠️☠️ Wot? Does that even mean??

J: Buddy you really ARE as thick as it gets

W: Yeahhhhh

J: Oooop

W: Okay, guess Liam and Miguel are different

W: lasdjflksajdf I love you, Nora

J: ☠️☠️☠️

J: Oh. Boy. 👀 Guess we will see how spicy these two are gonna get

W: Shush shush

J: Cause I ain’t heard a single f bomb yet ☠️

W: alksjdflkajsf that's very true

J: Buddy is zoned out Miguel you’re talking to a wall

W: I love Amy

J: 😂😂😂 Amy!

W: Buddy. Calm tf down. aksdjflkasjdflksajf You posing is not that significant

J: “I don’t know what to do with my hand”

W: "How can I look most James Bond?"

J: 👀

W: THE GENTLENESS OF HIS ARM GESTURE TO BREAK ALEX'S HOLD!!! DID YOU SEE THAT

J: I ddddidddd

W: Poor Amy

W: HENRY WHAT ARE YOU DOING

J: HENRY WHAT ARE YOU DOINF

W: alskdjf;lkasdjf

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

W: Poor Henry

J: Actually, they may be on the floor again… eventually

W: alksjdflkajfds

J: Oh god ☠️☠️☠️

W: Poor Henry aldskjflaksjfd

W: I wish they hadn't cut out the God Save the Queen thing

J: I knowww

W: Oop, hello Henry

J: I feel like I being a damn peeping Tom rn

W: Henry heard "love at first sight" and went BET

J: 👀👀👀

W: That. was not that explicit

J: Fair

W: That was addressing the rating thing, not you 🙄

J: Im starting to lose my optimism

J: “I’m bisexual” Oh. Oh really? You are? You don’t say ☠️

W: I love Henry. And his maypole comment

J: Henry should have been like well I’m straight and sat back while Alex imploded

W: alksjdflkasjf yeahhhh! "Best bro besties do this all the time"

J: Mhmmm yep for sure

W: Which, tbf, Alex full-on thought, so

J: ☠️☠️

J: THAT LOOK ☠️☠️☠️☠️

W: I'm finally caught up on the transcript 😭

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️ Oh noooo

W: See, I told you they'd be montages!

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️ "How many names do you have?"

W: Oh, not many... Just five

W: I take it back… Make that six

W: SIR

J: ☠️☠️☠️

W: HENRY! THAT! LAKSJDF;LKASJDF

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️ And the smug smirk after

W: Damn, homophobic grandfather instead of homophobic grandmother

W: Ooh, Alex, buddy, dealing with having a family like Henry's ain't that easy ngl

J: Yeahhhhh, that was very you-coded (Henry I mean)

W: Haha, let's go, expert-chameleons-in-a-homophobic-family squad

J: Budd- Ooop

J: Back to what I was saying... buddies that windows open

W: This is as bad as those spy/assassination movies where the target stands in front of the window

J: Right!? 🤣🤣🤣🤣

W: Also, in the book, we did know they got a fuzzy photo at some point. With a long-range camera. Maybe that's this

J: Trueee

W: Okay, ig this is the true measure of the rating

J: Welp

W: The key 😭

J: With the key on!?

W: Oi, shush shush

J: 👀

J: 👀👀👀👀👀

J: 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

W: You good?

J: *no answer*

W: NOW!?!?! YOU'RE HAVING THIS CONVERSATION NOW?!!?!?

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

W: Y'all this. This ain't that explicit. Definitely not worth an R-rating

J: 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Tis true!

W: Cas-coded

J: ☠️☠️ Spn can be found anywhere

W: I'm getting cereal, but don't pause; I'm bringing it with me

J: Ok lol

W: You and your fucking lols

J: L

J: I

W: lkj;lkja;lskfj;lsakdfjasdf THAT'S SO FUCKING FUNNY

J: I quit

W: You really thought you were doing something

J: My phone is just against me

W: alskdjfalksdjf

J: ☠️☠️☠️

W: Does June not exist? I'm starting to think she doesn't. She wasn't in the photo session earlier either

J: I knowwww

W: Luna's not shown up either. Unless that's who Miguel's supposed to be

J: And his parents are together

W: They're also not div- yeah

W: He will love it... until he gets fired ☠️

J: Eww rude

W: Ugh, I cannot believe I'm saying this about a Jane Austen story*, but that — “It isn’t what we say or think that defines us, but what we do.” — is a good quote

(*For those not Jezebel, despite being grudgingly somewhat fond of Jane Austen, I also was made to read her stories too many times and now also have a quiet grudge against her/her stories. And I loathe the 2005 Pride & Prejudice story, just on its own merit. Colin Firth/Jennifer Ehle miniseries forever <3)

J: 🤣🤣🤣

W: This poor dude

W: OOP

J: Uh oh. I think Miguel IS gonna BE Luna or be the leak

W: Skullduggery ❤️ (Kinda gives vibes of the Doctor Who conversation about, what was it... "With a little bit of jiggery-pokery." "Is that a technical term, jiggery-pokery?" "Yeah, I came first in jiggery-pokery. What about you?" "No, I failed hullabaloo.")

J: This’ll be interesting

J: Oh poor buddy 😂 “once, unsuccessfully”

W: Was that about the cooking comment or the Grindr comment?

J: Yes. Also, call me uncultured I haven’t seen that film either

J: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

W: Oh no

J: Uh oh 🤣🤣🤣

W: NO! NO ONE IN THIS HERE HOTEL ROOM AT ALL

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️

W: Zahra! Don't make assumptions! Tsk tsk! The "she" is a he, and also hiding in the closet! (I meant that literally, as they do have a habit of that happening, but it also turns out to be figurative too)

J: "It’s all chill"

W: Technically. They each already had an NDA

J: And now Zahra shall pass the fuck away ☠️

W: laskdf;lkajsdf Henry did not fucking pose ☠️

J: Poor thing! Does not get paid enough

W: alksdjflaksdjflaksdjf

J: “Oh god”

W: I love them 😭 Mid-tense-conversation and they're gabbing! "And I told my sister!" "Oh?! I didn't know that!" "Yeah, she was really happy for us!"

J: IT WAS SO ADORABLE

W: "Technically, I'm the spare" 😭 😭

W: ZAHRA MA'AM

J: WHAT!? 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Not "fuckleroy"

J: I said the same Zahra! 🤣🤣

J: Nooooo 🤣🤣

W: This poor woman did not know what she was getting into when she had this kid

J: I love herrr ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️

W: WHERE'S THE POWERPOINT :(

W: NEVER MIND AT LEAST SHE MENTIONED IT

J: Oh god. Oh no. OH NO ☠️☠️☠️

W: MA'AM PLEASE STOP GOING INTO THAT MUCH DETAIL

J: As a mom I get the concern but still ☠️☠️☠️

W: That's fair

J: I love his dad!

W: Yesss

W: Oh no

W: Is Henry wearing Alex's hat?

J: Yes

W: alsdkfja;lkdsfja;lksfdj

J: Oh my 😂😂😂😂😂

W: HEY, THAT'S NOT THAT BAD SINGING?!?!

J: Right?

W: I thought they said he butchered the karaoke

J: Right!?!

J: Oooop that was the damn I’ve done caught the feelings look

W: Yes it was

W: His dad again alsdkjfalksdjf

W: Ooh, supportive father moments! Couldn’t be me

J: 🥺🥺🥺

W: You know what's coming btw right

J: Yeah. Yeah I do. Shut up

J: And oh no that was cute

W: I KNOW

J: AND OH NO THAT WAS CUTE TOO

W: asldkfjalskfdj

J: Oh my gif he’s a vampire

J: *God

W: Gifs are your gods, to be fair

J: That is- Lol

J: That’s true tho

J: Anyway, he’s sparkling ☠️☠️☠️

W: That's called water

J: I know 😂 but he looked like twilight

W: I know, dumbass, 'twas a joke

J: And that’s Henry’s oh no he’s caught the feelings look

W: Yeppp, poor buddy

J: Oh nooooo! Buddy

J: Welp imma just go drown myself now

W: Oof, not even a pretense of it being bugs

J: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

W: hahahha- I'm fine

J: He’s not

W: Nor am I, really

J: 😭😭😭😭😭 Same

W: DAVID

J: Davidddd

J: 😭😭😭😭😭

W: This poor man

J: Pooor budddyyy

J: Nora ☠️☠️☠️ I’m sorry but that look, I died

W: Alex really is fucking thick, I'm sorry

J: ☠️☠️☠️

W: I say this affectionately, but dumbo… wtf

J: Oooo! OH THE FEELINGNIN THAY

W: What

J: OH THE FEELING IN THAT

W: Oh alskdjf

J: The acting I mean. But also oooop an f bomb! One more and there’s the R rating ☠️☠️☠️

W: Neither of us commented during that scene because all we'd say is: ouch

J: ! :) That. Was. Anyway

J: Hey! You know what

W: ?

J: You know what song would fit this? Or them?

W: If you say. That fucking song again.

J: 😂😂😂 And good omens honestly

W: Wait, was it the one I meant?

J: 🙂

W: "Unchained Melody"?

J: Unchained Melody

W: Yeha

W: *yeah

W: No, actually, embrace the cowboy. Yeehaw

J: I was about to say that (but oh my god my phone is pissssssing me offfff)

J: Oh mah god! I love this song

W: alskdjf I don't like this version tho

J: Sameee

J: What’s that statue doing in the background

W: About what Crowley's does, probably.

J: This is so soft thooooo ☠️☠️☠️

J: AWWWWWWWW

W: aksdjflsakfdj His history would include him and be like "this man was Henry's best friend and they lived together and snogged at times and weren't they such good friends!?!?!"

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

J: Buddy has a death grip on him

W: Okay, not to bring in GOmens but the signet ring is giving me Azi vibes

J: LOL! BUT THAAAAA RING

W: WHAT?!!? THE KEY IS JUST- WHAT

J: Ngl I like the exchange better than just him adding the ring

W: I don’t!!! I liked the "two homes, side-by-side" thing 😭

J: Yeah that’s true!

W: Uh oh

J: Oh no

W: The emails went out on fucking REDDIT!?!? Awkward

J: Ack! But also the slow panic on his face

J: Oooop buddy got angry

W: OOF

J: His "CONTACTS"

W: 'snort' Sure. Is that what we're calling fiancées these days

J: 😂😂😂😂

W: BRUH, MIGUEL YOU ASSHOLE

J: LE GASP! ugh and his little smug look

W: Miguel can fuck off

J: Right!?

J: Buddyyyyyy 🥺🥺🥺🥺

W: Wait, they didn't even get to talk before the speech?! That sucks

W: Ooh, fuck yeah! ALEX USED HENRY'S PROPER TITLE AND FULL NAME AND SHIT

J: 😭😭😭😭😭

W: I love Zahra btw

J: ZAHGGHHTAAAA

W: Wtf was that?! Also, this is basically her character in Person of Interest and Life, btw

J: 😂😂😂

J: Her face 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

W: Poor woman

J: 😂😂😂😂😂😂 Im dying

W: Having to sit here like Black Water and listen to rants about Xie Lian, but RWRB universe

J: OOP!

W: She just spilled so much

J: The wheels are turning for Alex

W: Holy shit, he's so thick

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ BABBYYYYY

W: OH SHIT THE LOOK

J: AHHH

J: OOOOP HES WEARING THE RING

W: On the fucking stairs alkdsfj

J: that looook! We haven’t got enough time with them. We’ve been robbed

J: Ah yes. This is something I guess you do when you are in an American/British relationship

W: asldkfjalskdjfasdflkj What's the this?

J: I swear I thought he was playing heart and soul but I meant playing together in general

W: … no. The subtitles even outright said "My Country, 'Tis of Thee"

J: I don’t have subtitles on ☠️

W: That sounds like a you problem

J: Ack! Fuck offf Philip

W: Can I slap him?

J: Please do

W: I miss Bea's rebellion tho

J: SAMEEEE

W: Oof

J: SHUT UP PHILIP

W: I KNOW! I think he might have a heart attack if he read them though

J: ☠️☠️☠️☠️

W: OOF

J: Oh sir ewwww you read them??? he's your grandsonnnnn

J: Ew x2

W: OOF x2

J: Bbabandbecause! I said so

W: Man can't even make a complete sentence

J: I have given up trying to type on this phone

W: To be fair, that was basically how he said it

W: WHAT WAS THAT PRONUNCIATION

J: "TAKE THE AMERICAN WITH YOU"

W: alsdkjf

J: Bby you are supported 😭😭😭

W: Oop, damn

J: Suck on that Philip

W: Hey, grandfather dude, you lost the right to call him "my boy" a while ago, btw

J: Ahhhhh 🙂 😁

W: "Crikey, that's a lot of red" I love him

J: 😂😂😂😂

W: Henry's kidnapping him

J: 😂😂😂

W: Henry!??! This mannnnn! I love him

J: AHHH! Love him!!

W: Henry looks so awkward on stage🙄 I love him, but like. He did

J: 😂😂😂 Poor budddy

W: Are you going to say anything other than cry-laugh emojis in the next half of the react?

J: Probably not 😂😂😂😂😂

W: Bruh, Alex didn't even have to ask… I guarantee Henry has been wearing that key religiously

J: 😂😂😂😂😂

W: Not speaking from experience or anything but-

J: Mhhmmm 🙂 so you-coded!

W: ... That's still me-as-Henry??? I'm missing the Alex parallels

J: I know!

W: You're infuriating

W: HENRY

J: YOU HAVE TO READ HENRYS CHAPTERRRRR! It’s like a what happens next

W: I liked Luna better than Miguel, tbh. I know they probably couldn't fit it, but still

J: Yeah! Im so easy to please I just loved it sm idec about what was changed! BUT I do wish it had been a mini series

W: Weirdo. Imagine being easy to please

W: There's an end-credit scene… Fast-forward to it

J: “Do you think anyone noticed” ☠️☠️☠️

J: I hadn’t reread the book yet but I’m going to now ☠️☠️☠️

#red white and royal blue #rwrb #reactions #movie reactions #jezebel (pr)#wench (pr)

3 notes · View notes

ennoshawty · 3 years ago

Text

HQ CAPTAINS AS THINGS

i was bored and felt like doing a crackfic thing but i didn’t have any solid themes or good ideas

SO I PRESENT TO YOU - THE CAPTAINS. AS THINGS. IDK HOW TO WORD THIS BUT YOU’LL SEE AS WE GO ALONG.

warnings: VERY LONG, slandering a crybaby oikawa (lovingly), mentions f!reader, shitposting, mentions of violence in kita's, (a bit) yandere!kita, cursing, unedited, me being an idiot

officer!daichi

we are: vigilante/troublemaker

loving the enemies-to-lovers trope so much

nah bro you ain’t full criminal (bc my preppy ass could never) you just do the small vandalism things y’know like drawing peepees on government buildings and knocking over bins

u literally confessed to him by spraypainting the entire billboard by his workplace “I LIKE YOU” like way to go girl

He didn’t appreciate the creative graffiti but he rlly likes u so all u had to do was clean it and then next thing u know yall are out on a cute cafe date

but let’s talk about before yall got together

he’d CHASE u thru alleyways when he’d catch you writing “police sux” on the fuckin wall

bro is NOT AT ALL afraid to jump onto the roofs it’s FRIGHTENING to see this huge ass police officer storm after u

HES SO FAST HOT DAMN WOMAN HOW DO U GET AWAY FROM HIM??? USAIN BOLT WHOMST???

you’d almost always get away by a hair - he’s SO SO close

and it frustrates him but excites u oooooo arrest me shawty

and this would continue for a while

but yall have such fun fun banter - you’d tease him and he’d say something back and you’d bolt and he’d chase

some days he’d catch you. but in those times u slip away somehow

he’s having so much fun and doesn’t even know it

and then at one point he doesn’t even care about bringing u to justice anymore. he knows it’s bad for business and it’s unprofessional but he’s so attracted to u

he doesn’t even know it. HES IN DENIAL!!! his mind: “oh i’m just asking about her so that i know her motives” bruh no u just asked about our fav pastry this aint about crime anymore

and when he finally gets it,,,DINGDINGDINGDING SOUND THE ALARMS !!! MAN IS WHIPPED!! he’s more shy around u awww,,,doesn’t even want to chase u anymore but he will still engage in banter w u.

yall get a little peace treaty in the lil crush stage - you both are kinda aware of ur feelings towards each other but don't really wanna mess it up and jeopardize whatever's going on like bros PLEASE JUST KISS ITS INFURIATING

it’s more of a competition to see who will break the other first (and you lost he’s too hot)

he lets u joyride his cop car in an empty parking lot <3 he is the one <3 this is true love

u gotta marry him right now bro no excuses

u are no longer on the crime side of the law,,,u support him and only him fuck the rest of the cops (i’m jk of course...or am i)

u are his badass sidekick <3 unofficially of course until he marries u

u help him with the small things like helping lost children find their parents and helping old ladies cross the street

but you want to do the FUN stuff - chasing thieves and arresting drunkards.

unfortunately, he loves u too much to put u in danger so he keeps u from doing the dangerous things

after some protesting later, he trusts u to take care of urself. and now yall have a competition just like old times - whoever catches the most baddies at the end of the month wins (he WILL scold u if ur too reckless though)

THE TWO OF U ARE JUST GOOD COP BAD COP UHAHAHAHAHAHA

but it’s much more complicated than that - it’s either ur the laidback one and he’s the strict one or ur the fiery one and he’s the person like “calm down”

PLEASE HE HATES BRINGING U TO INTERROGATIONS he’s trying to be serious but you keep making him laugh istg he has to kick u out each time

u still make him laugh when u pout-glare at him thru the glass

bro says he’s not the stereotypical cop but the moment u surprise him with donuts and coffee in the morning he will make out w u right then and there

even though yall dating he still won’t let u play with his equipment

but sometimes u grab his walkie talkie when he’s not looking and prank call the others

and his coworkers know by now they’re like “oh it’s daichis gf” and go along with it HAHAHAHA “this is alpha 1, daichi just contracted ligma, over.” “roger, but what’s ligma? over.” “*inhale* LIGMA-” *daichi takes the walkie talkie back*

his coworkers are chill lmaoooo they love u two as a couple THEY ARE VERY SUPPORTIVE they planned a surprise anniversary party of when u joined the force (unofficially)

the juniors tanaka and noya are jelly ooooo but they respect their captain <3

u loooooove hanging out w the starry-eyed new recruit hinata and he’s bouncing around asking u personal questions “how did you date the commander!!! what’s he like as a bf??” he also accidentally exposes how much daichi talks about u in the office before he drags him away and murders him off camera

he does get u a walkie talkie that’s just connected to his line, tho. for emergencies. it’s ur second phone basically that only has his number in it

daichi LOVES it when u massage him after he’s had a long day but his shoulders are stiff as a statue,,,he’s also super stronk and can carry u anywhere <333

IMAGINE HE HAS A POLICE DOG - he doesn’t, but he’ll get one of his buddies to bring u a k9 unit so u can pet it and when he sees how happy u are he considers getting one PLSSS IT WOULD FIT HIM HELPPP

bro is VERY strict on safety. bulletproof glass in yalls house. alarms + cameras everywhere. trackers on every device. underground bunker. (just kidding lol)

daichi teaches u self-defense and gets u a bejeweled taser for ur bday <333 MARRY THIS MAN RIGHT NOW OR I’LL-

in other words i love daichi and he is husband material WIFE ME UP BUDDY

househusband!oikawa

we are: girlboss sugar mommy

somehow you tamed this bish to becoming your obedient malewife

and by obedient i mean whiny but compliant

IS MORE ATTACHED TO YOUR BLACK CARD THAN TO YOU. I SAID IT. THE TRUTH.

sure, he’s pretty and gives affection sometimes but the only time he’s bein cute and snuggly w u is when a new fendi purse came out and he wants it

his specialty is cooking but he’s so lazy he’s all “just get the maid to do it”

please give ur workers a raise he’s so demanding

when you take him to ur business parties hes ALWAYS bragging about you and ur large house with this and that and his favorite: indoor hot tub. he always brings up the indoor hot tub.

only reason you bring him is cuz he’s pretty and he whines when you leave him alone for too long

yall cant even stay for too long - he’ll practically drag u out of the building and whining that it’s too hot and his suit is too stuffy and to call a limo

he’s not afraid to embarrass u if u dont give him what he wants and he will spit out food at a formal dinner if its not to his liking

probably in competition w househusbands! makki and mattsun about who gets the best house so he’s constantly begging u for an extension to the house “please babe!!! makki has-” “no.”

8/10 times throws tantrums in public and 1465/10 times throws tantrums in the house

he wants to cry for the sake of crying. one time he lost his shirt and he wouldn’t stop bawling for 15 min

please find him a hobby

crybaby . the moment u give him the glare of death it’s over. but he’s got a cute crying face which makes up for his annoying whimpering

like he made the mistake of throwing a temper tantrum in the mall only for you to glare at him with a look that said “we’re discussing this when we get home and you’re gonna get your ass beat” and walk away. immediately stopped what he was doing and he was running after u, sniffling and mumbling apologies

please humble him and have him sleep outside. the couch is too luxurious to banish him to. he made sure of it himself. it’s reclining and has charging ports. he will not learn his lesson that way

does NOT want you to get a pet or a kid or even another sugar baby/househusband - he wants to be the center of ur attention

speaking of which he HATES it when you work for too long or work overseas. when u come back he’ll pout at u and give u the petty silent treatment

don’t bother trying to comfort him he thrives off of it and he’ll keep going so u can keep paying attention to him. if u just ignore him back he’ll come crawling back to u. “WHY ARE YOU IGNORING ME IGNORING YOU?? DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE???”

one time yall got into a fight and he was all like “since ur being a rude mommy i’ll just find someone else !!!” inside u were like “oh god finally” but instead u said “okay”

ohmygod he panicked. he was rlly expecting for u to fight for him,,, but he doesn’t want to admit defeat first so he tries to go thru with it but you literally dont care. even when he has his chanel luggage packed and he’s standing by the door ur just like “ok bye bitch”

So he’s trying to stand by the door and wait for u to say that ur joking. ur not.

“fine! I’m leaving now!” “okay.” “...*sniffles*” “tooru, go.” “WAAAAH NO IM SORRY I DONT WANT TO-”

u knew this was going to happen sadly. u even hid the keys to all of the sports cars u own just in case he was actually going to go thru with it

tries to get in the gossip circle with the neighborhood trophy wives but they don’t think he’s cool enough. they like u though. they think ur hot asf and oikawa doesn’t like them no more bc theyre hitting on his ATM. but thanks to that u know all the gossip and shit even though u don’t ask for it

Every time u pass by a store where he thinks he wants something he’ll just cling to u and give the puppy dog eyes. like it could be out of nowhere and u see it and you’re like “where. which store.”

bro once he went luxury he never went back. he wouldn’t EVER step foot into a grocery store ever again congrats he’s been bimbo-ified

beat him with ur gucci belt pls it’s so funny

also please please PLEASE discipline him. tell him it’s NOT okay to just randomly purchase the entire swarovski store or to throw a party at ur house just bc he’s feeling petty about u being at work for too long. ofc he’ll bitch about it but you need to be firm

but don’t worry,,,he’ll get the idea when u take away black card privileges and slap him around (lovingly)

now he has to ask permission like a good boy. he’ll kneel and hug u and give a lil pout and whine

you got a bigass man child i’m sorry maam u should’ve picked tobio or ushi

ceo!kuroo

we are: secretary

bruh keeps it mostly professional during work hours

but that all gets shedded off like a snake when we on break

one minute he’s all “get these papers done by today or i swear on all that is holy i will destroy you” and then later he’s all “hey sweetheart wanna grab a cup of coffee”

flirty flirty FLIRTY FLIRTY AAAAA HES A MENACE

but you’re less than impressed bc y’know when the time clocks out and its time to go back to work he’s ruthless once more

HUMBLE HIM FOOL only when you’re on break though

will NOT stand for anyone else in the workplace bullyin u - NO WAY. only HIM

he’s got TONS and TONS of dirt on everyone in the office - NO ONE is safe so they wouldn’t even dare

RIP janet from accounting

that dumb bitch made the mistake of insulting u to ur face and in front of him. never heard from her again

it’s not even limited to the other employees - he’s not afraid to go off on a potential business partner if they dared disrespect you

bruh tries to call u on ur off days for the most randomest shit and to get ur attention

*picks up phone* “sir?” “ah! my favorite secretary ever! listen, i need you to grab my pens from my desk at the office and bring them to my place.” “...with all due respect, it’s 2 am, sir.”

but u have to comply with his ridiculous demands cuz he’s the bank

and he depends on u completely. as much as he hates to admit it - u have his schedules, itinerary, provide coffee, performance rates, stock info, you name it.

once u were out sick and he had the worst management - he’s not used to working without you

def tries to get some of ur workload off of u bc he’s worried that the stress of working for him made u sick + he doesn’t want to go thru scheduling again

prolly gets bored in meeting rooms and sends u little smirks and wiggles his eyebrows and weird looks while he’s sitting and ur standing in the corner like bruh pay attention

maybe sometimes he’s secretly makin fun of the presenter and doodling on his spare sticky note something funny to make u crack a smile

he’ll tease u for it of course “oh, secretary! you should be paying more attention! what would you do if this was important?” bruh i can multitask now keep airdropping me ur selfies i’m saving all of them (news flash: u dont save his dumbass selfies otherwise his ego will inflate too much)

sometimes likes to pull u aside from work to hug u - you say it’s highly unprofessional but he says it’s his stress reliever

you ALMOST got caught by one of the newbies and he was kabedon-ing you

he tries to play it off (since u were embarrassed too) but u know better,,,DO NOT LET HIM FORGET ABOUT IT he turns red and embarrassed every single time USE THIS TO UR ADVANTAGE !!

never goes into an elevator without you bruh is so attached to u n holds the doors open for you

but you have to open normal doors for him if he doesn’t know how it works (hint: manual doors. “why isn’t it opening on its own?” “sir, there’s a handle.” “but?? what does it do??”)

bruh acts like a dumbass sometimes so you can baby him :/// wtf man just because you’re rich doesn’t mean i’ll- ...wait...how much did you say…? that many zeros? HAND ME THAT FORK YES I’LL FEED YOU COME HERE- HERE COMES THE AIRPLANE BITCH

brings u to overseas trips and he spoils u too

no matter how much you insist that you’re ok he gives u a lot of luxurious items. “think of it as a bonus from me.” NOW YOU JUST HAVE A COLLECTION OF NICE SHOES/BAGS/JEWELRY AND HE LOVES IT WHEN YOU WEAR THEM TO WORK IT MAKES HIM SO HAPPY UGHHHHH

BRUH just a sugar daddy at this point “you have to look presentable for the next focus group so here’s a nice rolex watch” “sir, i don’t need-” “ah ah ah - it’s my treat.”

it’s pointless to refuse him but he still teases u for it like what???? “if i didn’t know any better, secretary, i’d say you’re just doing it for my money and not my fabulous looks and personality.” “exactly.” “hey!”

yall go for drinking parties a lot. whether with the whole branch or just the two of u

KARAOKE W KUROO AFTER A LONG DAY OF WORK <333 becomes a ritual between the two of u

he’s so silly when he’s drunk lmfaoooo goofy ass mf

but that’s only when it’s the two of u. he controls his alcohol around others and his uncool side is only for u <3

also ur the only one he trusts to take him back to his place and handle him

it’s the other way around too - when u drink a lot he looks after you <333

you have a higher tolerance than him and sometimes u have competitions between the two of u on who can drink more but then yall always end up shitfaced

HES the one who has a crush on you

you know the drill - gaslight gatekeep girlboss

he’ll do anything for u but wouldn’t ever admit it he simp

offers u the keys to his estate and offers for you to LIVE with him

bruh just marry me already ok WAIT WE’RE NOT EVEN DATING YOU NEED TO WORK ON THAT SIR-

he’s so awkward tryna confess to u,,,he may be this big hotshot ceo but he’s acting like a schoolgirl in love

probably prints u a confession when he asks u to go to the fax machine lmfao what a nerd

in other words ceo!kuroo is a nerd and you need to top him immediately get that bank

dog hybrid!bokuto

we are: owner

Husky-malamute breed!!! BEEG DOGGIE VERY HAPPY N DROOLY <333

OVERLY HYPER. JUMPS ON ANYONE AND U AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT

he’s well trained i swear but the moment he sees something of interest then i’m sorry you just lost him

please if a robber came in he wouldn’t even attack them he’d just tackle them w hugs

he loves loves loves snuggles <333 u busy? nope!!! hug time!!! cooking something?? oo lemme see!!! whoops look at all those tomatos on the ground. u got a deadline coming up and u really need to focus?? CUDDLE TIIIIIIME- w-wait - huh?? why are u shoving me off?? do you - do you not - huh?!?! WHY ARE YOU LOCKING ME OUT OF THE ROOM?? NO!!!! I LOVE YOU!!! IDK WHAT EXAMS ARE BUT I WANT CUDDLES!!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME????!!!

the WORST things u could ever do to him is leave him and call him a bad boy

HE CRIES ON THE SPOT </3 HOW COULD YOU </3

soso bummed when u go out of the house without him </333 waits by the door patiently waiting for u to come back </333 sob sob

the moment he hears the door unlock he LEAPS and his tail is wagging like CRAZY

he is SO STRONG. almost always knocks u over whenever he jumps on u

destroys EVERY toy u bring him. u leave him for 5 seconds and there’s stuffing all over the floor and whatever u brought him is nonexistent

tugs on the leash when u walk so much that it SNAPS

loves romping w the other dogs in the dog park but he needs to tone down on his friendliness he almost killed a lil orange chihuahua

gets distracted by EVERYTHING. ooh, squirrel! oo, butterfly! OOO HUMAN CHILD!! MUST EAT!!!

ok while he might be friendly, he still gets super super jealous. you both were outside and u were petting the neighborhood black cat and bruh almost swallowed his head

which u thought was weird bc the two are normally friends and are pretty nice around each other

so now he’s more feisty around him and any other cat that’d get ur attention

If it was a person, then that’s another thing. He’d be very friendly at first but then slowly realize that ur attention is more directed on them than him. then he’d go ballistic

but when u scold him for practically assaulting the poor dude and call him a bad boy,,,he’s lost it

u have to lock him in the other room and he’s crying and whimpering, scratching at the door. all he wanted to do was protect u from that bad bad man who took away his owner’s attention !!!

def snarls at the dude next time he comes into ur house/apartment...dude never came back

“GRRR” “AAAA GET UR FRIGGIN DOG B-” “he don bite” YES IT DO GET UR-”

doggie bokuto rlly tries to be slick...it doesn’t work. like he tries to do that thing when he’s a total demon towards the guy but then act like an angel around u but it doesnt work bc he’s not smooth

doggie intelligence: 2 IQ. one time u got him a puzzle box and hid a treat in it but bruh couldnt figure it out just straight up monched the entire puzzle simply bc he smelled his fav bbq treat in it

speaking of intelligence - he only knows how to say a few words like ur name and incomplete sentences. speaks in barks and whines and sometimes a word

SO BIG THAT HE GRABS FOOD FROM THE TABLE WHEN YOU’RE NOT LOOKING

u had some delicious beef steak? oh dear, where did it go? there’s ur puppy kou with steak sauce all over his lips

big fan of hiking trips, sports, literally anything that involves going out

he LOVES getting dirty outside playing. boi cant control himself from rolling around in the mud

hates baths at first but then he likes how u spray the water on him and giggles awww he likes bath time now

we all know he’s not the brightest pup of the pack but,,,he’s somehow psychic. he knows when ur taking him to the vet

HE THROWS A BIG FUSS ALL THE TIME - sometimes he tries to hide but his huge tail under the couch gives it away

and he knows when ur thinking of taking him on a walk. he also begs u to take him outside by settling his head in ur lap and pouting until u give him what he wants

he likes the big ol doggie sweaters/pjs u buy him...but he always ruins them. no matter how much u buy him, they’re all ruined. he complains how scratchy it is and it feels weird on him

knows LOTS of tricks but if u teach him more than what he already knows he will forget one of them he’s like a damn pokemon

he feels ur emotions :((( if ur mood is down his tail droops :(( and he gives u cuddles and tries to make u feel better

he even likes to make a fool out of himself and be silly if it makes u laugh :((( he’s so precious

in other words i love doggy bokuto

pirate!ushijima

we are: kidnapped

ah yes we’re are captives of the most fearsome pirates of the seas: shiratorizawa

just so you know, tendou was the instigator. he was all “let’s kidnap a noble’s kid and get the ransom money!” (whether you actually are a noble or not is up to you)

thing is, nobody’s willing to pay (if you aren’t a noble) or the pirates really pissed off the folks in charge and are now doing a manhunt

so yeah you aren’t going back anytime soon

but he’s a pretty good sport about it - very hospitable

he notices the little things u like and gets them for u <333 sighs <333

he saw you reading that book? wow look at that, there’s suddenly a stack of them and the same genre he saw you reading

but you definitely shouldn’t test him. he’s SUPER scary when it comes down to it

you saw how ruthless he was with the rogues that had dared to challenge him on sea

mf made them walk the plank

you help on the ship bc u wanna be useful and also shirabu keeps being mean

he asks u to teach the crew how to read cuz theyre dumb as shit and only know water and treasure

speaking of treasure - when he leaves u on the ship to explore a cave, he gets u really pretty jewelry <33 anything u ask for

“oh, welcome back captain. how was your mission?” “i brought back a few trinkets i thought you might like.” *reveals whole chest of priceless gems* “are they to your liking? if not, we can set sail for something else that might interest you.” “I-”

bruh got a pet eagle - u ask the crew and they dont even know how tf it happened

hell, even he doesn’t know how it happened wtf. “oh. one day it flew down to me and i fed it. that’s all.” wtf

equivalent to diluc’s bird - he didn’t even give it a name so he gives u the honors

U name him rigatoni (you got a great naming sense btw)

oh my god oh my god oh my god HE TRIES TO PROTECT U WHEN PPL WERE TRYNA INVADE THE SHIP

it was the first thing he did no cap - burst into ur room and scoops u up <33333

“what the-” “we need to get you to safety. we are under attack.” and holds u close to his chest AAAHSIDHFPSDHFN OH MY LORD YES

HAS THE TEAM GIVE U SELF DEFENSE LESSONS AFTER THAT

tendou tries to give u a sword but ushi says no “she could hurt herself.”

“but ushiwaka! we can teach her not to hurt herself” “...it’s my orders.” “c’mon, be more honest, ushiwaka! what’s the real reason?”

he goes quiet then looks at u “...i’ll always be there to help. she’ll have me.” AOISHSDHFSNDF

HELPPPPP SIOJFDSKFJP HES SO CHARMING AND HE DOESNT EVEN TRY

but the rest of the crew are like “then what’s the point”

but tendou sneaks u a dagger just to be safe

sorry ur apart of the crew now - but they’re like a family even if they did kidnap u

oh whatever your life before wasn’t as cool as this (no offense)

they are given orders to protect u at all costs

speaking of which - ushi isn’t all that great w guns

almost blew his own head off tryna figure out how it works before reon snatched it from him

he brings you with him to towns and cities and he likes taking u to the markets to get you stuff

ushijima tell me your love language is gift-giving without telling me your love language is gift-giving-

he finds out you’re pretty good at bargaining and brings you onshore a lot more

is mesmerized at how you absolutely BERATE the merchant who was tryna rip you off like sis where is this violence coming from??? he loves it??

he also likes to stop by some pretty islands and imagines just settling down in such a nice place w you <333 SIGHS <333 VERY <333 LOUDLY <333

no matter how much he likes you...he will NOT let you drive the boat under any circumstances </3 its his livelihood c’mon man

whenever you have to stay on the ship while he’s away he sends rigatoni to give messages and the two of u talk thru messages

speaking of which rigatoni is fierce and can definitely sink his talons and his sharp beak into any bastard that dares get near you while the captain is away

wakatoshi “swimming is for pussies” ushijima - he’s water resistant

bruh so powerful he walks on water

second coming of christ who

IM JUST KIDDING he does swim but we hardly ever see it

legends say (tendou says) he looks rlly awkward doing it and only knows how to doggie paddle

speaking of our homeboy tendou - he loooves spooking the team (and especially you) with scary stories . don’t worry tho - this is all a ploy to get the beeg pirate husband to comfort u at night ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) he is ur wingman u can count on him. but his suggestions are ridiculous

“Jump off the deck and see if he’ll catch you!” um excuse me- THOU SHALT NOT PUT BIG HUSBAND TO THE TEST

he’s got good intentions...i think…

but everyone literally knows he would dive after you

in other words pirate!ushijima is a softie at heart but goddamn he probably secretly has a pet shark so dont test him or u goin overboard

mafia leader!kita

we are: associate from different group/family

kita highly respects u and yall have been acquainted since u were young with the alliance of ur families

so in a way ur childhood friends but yall do have lil bit of friendly rivalry a bit

arranged marriage whuuuutttt...yeah thats what happened but u love him <3

nobody else knows about ur arranged marriage but you two

POLITE GENTLEMAN <333 !!! HNNNNNNNN his granny raised him right even tho he’s a mafia leader

RICH BOY RICH BOY RICH BOY- ALWAYS DRESSES DASHINGLY AND SMELLS GREAT MMMMMM

he owns the majority of the underground casinos

and has lots of connections with others. countless, might i add.

you on the other hand specialize as an arms dealer so he cherishes your services the most

prob has the traditional tattoos allllll over his back and shoulders w like a dragon or sm and def a fox or kitsune

when u two were little he asked ur favorite flower and GOT THAT TATTOOED ON HIS BACK <3 probably secretly has your initials hidden in there somewhere

u both have a silent understanding of each other and he talks to u more than he does anyone

before he used to smoke but once he figured out that you didn’t like the smell of cigarettes he quit just like that

his underlings, the miya twins are so confused on how kita switches from totally brutal and ruthless to so soft around u

they can’t tease him for it, though, cuz he’d pulverize them

but they want to know more about u,,,you mysterious enigma,,,but kita would kill them if they dared asked about you

so they go to inarizaki’s most secretive informant/cyber mercenary, suna rintarou

and suna knows all about you. he saw you one time and he was curious about who you were and is now rlly scared of you because he dug too deep and you’ve got LOTS of history

he doesn’t dare tell the twins what he found no matter how much they bug him

until they bribe him at just the right price

and when aran finds out and tells kita?? ohhh boy it’s lights out for all three of them

oh my god ,,, would kill for u he loves u so much

one time you were kidnapped and held hostage

bro saw red

MAFIA ANNIHILATION SPEEDRUN ANY % NO GLITCH

he got world record time

wiped out the entire conglomerate behind it - nothing and nobody left behind after that

and of course, made sure you were safe.

yandere? ofc not...i mean...just look at him...so innocent...he would never...sharpening that knife...with splattered blood all over him...

is now joined at the hip with u,,,no matter how much you tell him you’ll be fine now and that you have tons of reliable bodyguards he won’t let it go

“don’t you have to go back to your place?” “this is my duty as both a fellow associate and your future husband.” aww,,,ur so sweet...but BRUH PLEASE GO HOME ARAN IS DOING EVERYTHING OVER THERE

makes sure to build a headquarters DIRECTLY NEXT TO YOURS so that its faster

and it’s not long until he just signs a deal to merge ur factions together (since yall getting married anyways)

and oh my god...ur underground wedding is SO SO PRETTY

absolutely DOESN’T care if he’s smuggling jewels from different countries - he’s having your ring CUSTOM MADE and the way you want it. “the diamond is too small? sure thing, darling, i’ll have it 7 times that size.”

makes sure everything is perfect in ur wedding <333 its very extravagant and even though its not really his style he’ll do anything for you

he absolutely WOULD take your last name if you wanted. FIGHT ME ON THIS

takes you to his private island for ur honeymoon so that the two of you don’t have to worry about work

meanwhile aran is scrambling around the place trying to cover for the both of you

he’s a VERY romantic husband - NEVER takes off his ring even for security. he says its practically a part of him just like you are <3

the ring has a built in tracker connected to an app. possessive? noooo...

in other words this escalated pretty quickly but i aint complaining if it gets me married to kita

--EXTRA EXTRA!! other characters’ roles!!--

officer!daichi:

karasuno squadron consists of:

cops: daichi (duh), asahi (mostly patrol, he hates confrontation), tanaka & noya (mostly accompanied by ennoshita), hinata & kageyama

investigators/detectives: sugawara, ennoshita, yamaguchi, tsukishima, kiyoko, yachi

surveillance: narita, kinoshita, tsukishima too

househusband!oikawa:

makki and mattsun are also househusbands

iwaizumi is a malewife fhasodjkasdhf-

ceo!kuroo:

lev is the newbie that walked in on u two-

janet still a bitch

kenma is his fellow ceo buddy. he also owns a multimillion dollar company and kuroo’s and his have a sort-of contract so you see him a lot in meetings

yaku is like one of the top performing managers so whenever yall have branch meetings he’s there

dog hybrid!bokuto:

kuroo is the black neighborhood cat bokuto almost murdered cough cough i did that on purpose yes i did

kenma is also another neighborhood cat. you don’t see him around that often but now that bokuto got jealous he stays far away.

hinata is the orange chihuahua i briefly mentioned

i couldn’t decide whether akaashi would stay human and be his previous owner or also be a cat/dog/owl. so lets say he’s ur human friend that is your bestie and comes over a lot. bokuto likes him, though. still gets jealous a bit.

pirate!ushijima:

tendou is practically is right hand man

the rest of the team have something to give idk how to explain pirate team members okay-

BUT BUT BUT- they do have sea rivals which are the seijoh pirates. you ran into them one day and oikawa thought you were kidnapped (you were, but you liked it there) so he tried to do you justice and failed miserably. ushijima ragdolled him into the ocean when he flirted w you.

mafia!kita:

the twins are something akin to mercenaries basically. or just plain lackeys.

suna is an informant/cyber mercenary. he gathers information about ppl which is how he knew about you. and he’s a hacker lol.

aran is his second-in-command, omimi + ginjima are his bodyguards

a/n: im going to regret posting this

#haikyuu #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu captains #daichi sawamura #oikawa toru #kuroo tetsuro #kita shinsuke #ushijima wakatoshi #bokuto kotaro #x reader

97 notes · View notes

batarangsoundsdumb · 4 years ago

Text

guess fucking what? my inbox is so fucking full right now i'm unloading all of this shit in one post.

For the 11th gotham memes: gothamites react to bruce being jacked in a tiktok he made with kids, like super yoked, ripped as hell

fucking hilarious thanks. i think i did it in one meme post, but i genuinely don't remember which one

i dunno which of the batfam would do this but one time i was sleeping over at a friends house and ended up on the floor bc the bed was so very small and i just stayed there because the rug was soft

that's a drunk jason move i don't know what to tell you

tim and jason are "i listen to pop punk" solidarity. whenever jason highjacks the batmobile theyll go on long ass car rides blaring mcr and paramore and then never talk about it again

as they should!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tim: no jason it's my turn using the aux cord i gotta put on my jams jason: don't you dare put on weird shit tim: don't worry, you're gonna love this *plays fearless (taylor's version)

hear me out hear me out, red hood stans 🤝 nightwing stans t h i g h s

holy shit yes.

SNL au: Bruce breaks character when pretending to superman and says something like "I'm not superman! You've seen his gps!! It's from 2001!!!" @sabeanybabe

superman flies past the snl building the next day just to say 'actually it's from 2005, i'm not a heathen'

does your back hurt from carrying the batfam fandom

it hurts more from the exotic rock collection i keep in my backpack, but thanks for the concern.

I love your posts by why would you always leave the best parts in the tags?

as a treat for the people that check the tags ;) (and also because i'm committed to the short post aesthetic)

somehow your playlist was everything i never knew i needed. i mean it. this is my new favorite playlist.

and don't you dare get a new favourite playlist!

babe ur stoner tim playlist is exactly too perfect, earth is literally blessed by ur existence

babe thanks so much! i love my stoner tim playlist because it's just my usual playlist but people think it's an artistic choice that i put taylor swift and britney spears in there, when it's just what i unironically like listening to

JANDKSKDK BILLY RAY CYRUS ON THE STONER TIM PLAYLIST I LOVE IT IT

again it's not even an ironic choice, i know every single word and i genuinely like the song

The last chapter of Fundamentals of Casework has me crying at work. Thanks I love it @dudelookitsalesbian

oh babe, i'm sorry, but also, not sorry i love chapter 4 so much it's my lovechild with the 'mental illness' tag

soooo....stumbled on your tumblr by some stroke of fate??? read your DC fanfic first. which is PHENOMENAL btw. then found all the batmemes; the funniest thing EVER bc everyone forgets about regular old gothamites. kept scrolling and your blog pops up as recommended. clicked on the ao3 for shits and giggles and waddaya know?!?!? it's YOU!!! you're LEGEND!!!! ever seen that meme? it's a video of a cat that got into a baseball field and the two announcers get really invested in his escape attempt and start giving a play by play of the cat instead of the game. memeable moment: "GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!"

i seriously think about this ask every single day and it's so fucking funny to me that i've never seen the meme you're referencing, but i still find myself going 'GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!' whenever i see something funny. but wow i'm glad you liked this steaming pile of garbage

Fav dc character overall? And fav batfamily character?

don't ask me to pick between the loves of my life, but i can tell you i've cried about every single batfamily member and also wally west (my beloved)

What's your opinion on fans having a problem with batfam being "too big"? And some even claim that batfam is just "Bruce Alfred Dick Damian" and the rest of them are just "friends and allies" (source: reddit) Personally, I like batfam because of this reason but idk

stupid. a family can never be too big. i'm not that big a fan of like huge batfam stuff with everybody from every single universe, because as much as it's funny for bruce to have like 30 kids, it just feels a little too OOC for me.

This is the best tag I've seen involving the batfam, thanks for thinking of it

This is canon now @nctxrejects

lmao yeah i think at that point alfred has had to sit through like at least a dozen coming out talks and just has a pride flag collection in the attic that he pulls out whenever a kid comes out

idk why batfam hits different as compared to any other superhero family

bc it's found family and usually the other superhero families are almost all genetically related in one way or another

I don't know if you watch the umbrella academy but I saw your last post about batcest and saw the similarities. But the thing is (although I think it's weird) in TUA, they addressed it by saying "they were raised as weapons, not siblings" or something along those lines, which is simply not the case with batfam.

yeah i watched tua but i also thought it was ridiculous and they still treated each other as siblings so i didn't like the luthor/allison thing, and am glad they stopped doing that shit bc it fucking sucked.

Hot take: Batcest shippers are the same people who believe adopted siblings are not actual siblings

smoking hot take: batcest shippers are the people who watch 'my sister got stuck in the washing machine' porn

Duke was adopted by Bruce?

not technically no, but do i, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb, look like i care?

True story but I had to change my freaking name because it used to be "Damien" and most people would go "OH LIKE DAMIAN WAYNE" like please I'm just tryna live

true story, but i don't actually think of damian when i hear the name damian, literally the first thing that pops up is damian darkh like bruh what?

apparently dc comics company supported comic stores by giving out new titles and stuff during the beginning of the pandemic to help them run and I just think that's wholesome

ah yeah that's so fucking cool, still don't like dc, the company, because this world is a capitalist hellhole and we're all owned by warner brothers or disney with no in between.

ayo looking at tumblr head canons and finding out bruce is actually a terrible father is a punch in the gut

lmao yes, in like 50% of comics bruce is a terrible father and it gives me whiplash

oooh I just saw the jason todd vs winter soldier post and the real question is: batman vs iron man

while iron man has like hundreds of cases of armor, batman could throw out an emp and have the guy dropping out of the sky in 2 seconds.

dickfast = fastdick = quickdick = quickie

magnum hot take

hey bata(?) just thought I'd let you know I have copied the obnoxious emoji and Billy Ray post for use on simping men going forth

thank you 😘🌷 (@spacebarsidecar)

why would you do that to your followers???? i get why i did it, but why would you???

what is scarecrow made the nightwing funko pop himself, like those diy-ers that paint over other ones

oh god no, horrible take, horrible take, that's a disgusting thought oh no

I see your HC that Bruce and Oliver fucked and raise you this: Dick and Roy ALSO fucked

yes they did and it was a horrible moment for jason to find out dick has fucked both of his best friends

"at this rate bruce adds like 1 child to his family every decade or so" Duke is introduced in 2013, Damian as Damian, not as an unnamed child, in 2006. And he is already 14 years old, Robins rarely remain Robins after 16 😬 It looks like a new Robin and Batkid will appear in a couple of years

i mean i can't wait? but somebody will probably die first tho, we're due for another major character death. my money's on either cass or duke this time.

BRO you're so right all of your Bruce's ex headcanons are amazing but they aren't ships, that's kinda wild. Like I don't want any peeks into how their relationship was I just want to see everyone make fun of them

lmao YES it's just i love bruce being a slut, like good for him.

I am in love with your posts your honour thank you

omg thanks are we like,, gonna kiss now?

The justice league needs to have a meeting to discuss how many of their members/partners have slept with bruce. Because through a combination of cannon & fannon (if DC wasn’t homophobic) we have AT LEAST: 1) clark 2) lois 3) oliver 4) dinah 5) john

Thats not counting villains or random civilians @dudelookitsalesbian

yes yes yes, they'll have a yearly meeting about how many of their collective exes could be out for revenge and batman's list just keeps getting longer.

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

and what about it?

when steph's fighting livewire and she zaps her with lighting and nothing happens and then they both just. stand there awkwardly for a second and talk. yeah i couldn't stop laughing at that batgirl steph is the BEST

oh yeah that was fucking hilarious and i think it would be so cool and sexy of dc to give steph a little comic series,,, as a treat

Hi I absolutely adore all of yours "Bruce and Oliver very badly pretending they didn't fuck each other" memes

lmao i do too

I need you to know that “Bruce Wayne had frosted tips” is one of my favorite Bruce takes of all time it’s so galaxy brained. you’re right and you should say it

he also painted his hair blonde once when he was travelling and in conclusion, this is why he's being blackmailed by the gotham gazette.

you know my thing about gordon being branded as the only good cop in gotham is its a load of shit like arguably he's a good person and not working to screw people over or anything but the fact that he also works w. batman makes him a shit cop. like yea batman is better than the mob but its still illegal its still an abuse of power he just not making bank

babe, all cops are bad cops. (but yeah youre absolutely right, working with vigilantes makes you a shit cop, but also working against vigilantes just makes you an asshole cop yanno?)

ruh roh i think i’m about to add “so not yeehaw” every time i don’t like something

that's a very good vocabulary upgrade

somehow i feel like steph already knew. like babs obviously knew but i feel like bruce got high/drunk in front of steph and started telling his boarding school stories and steph was just like “oh you fucked up i’m never gonna forget this”

steph and bruce have weird uncle/rebellious niece dynamic and they just hang out sometimes and bruce will be like 'i once broke my arm when i tripped over a hedge when i was drunk so oliver drove me to the hospital on an electric scooter' and steph will just have to sit there with that knowledge in her head.

Hello I just wanted to tell you you are So right in all your steph opinions bc she is, in fact amazing and I think that's very sexy of you. Ps. Your Bruce/Oliver fic is hilarious

babe, thank you so much and yes steph is amazing and i love her and she deserves the world and she's the best member of the batfam hands down. also thanks

In Supersons we see a couple of kids that are implied to be Damian and Jon's children and the boy has laser eyes and can fly, so I asume he's not adopted. The girl, who calls Bruce grandpa, can also fly, btw. So it's canon (probably by accident) that Jon can have kids and he must have married one of Bruce's kids. (I'm hoping for Damian, mostly because any other of his children would be waaaaaaaaaaaaay too old.) @artemisa97

lmao that was probably an accident seeing as jon is a 17 year old superhero in the year 3000 (by the jonas brothers)

You know, I'm a die hard fan of your memes, but I gotta say one thing: if Gothamites actually took gas mask everywhere with them, then the Scarecrow would just be a weird dude in a weird costume, and not a villain oh so scary. DC really should just takes notes from you.

bold of you to assume there's no gothamite anti-maskers

How does it feel being the funniest person on this app?

horrible, next question.

I can't listen to Green Day or Billy Joel without thinking of your post about how Bruce got arrested at a Billy Joel concert @nightwings-kid

yeah that's your mistake, i on the other hand can't enjoy billy joel without thinking about the glee rendition of 'uptown girl'

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

superman: so what do you do in your free time? batman, thinking about the superman fanfiction he's writing on the batcomputer: i have no free time

bruce and oliver be like boyfriends to co-workers 401k (do the justice leagues get 401ks??? not that bruce and ollie would need them, but-)

lmao yes just 400 thousand words of bruce realising 'oh dip oliver is such a fucking dumbass' (also i don't know what a 401 k is but i assume they don't?)

Gothamites would totally boo superman as he saves Gotham while batman is out. @meenje

he's like 'okay think about that next time you want to be saved from an alien octopus'

I just took long break from dc comics and I come back to see ric grayson ??

i think it's very cool and sexy of dc to see dick and just think 'you know what? let's just give him a traumatic brain injury' and then didn't develop his character in any real way

SPEAKING OF RIC GRAYSON, gothamites making confused memes out of ric grayson is much needed

'dick grayson is my taxi driver? can anyone explain what the fuck happened he looks like an italian plumber?'

i hate to say it but batfam are def "marvel characters" in that sense they are characters who are human but become superheroes unlike most dc characters who are gods trying to be human maybe this is why I like batfam

fair enough

#this is only like half of it #but at least you can get like a few answers #yanno fuck it #bataranswers #ask #asks #anon

220 notes · View notes

heyitsyn · 4 years ago

Text

White Carnation

Ex!Iwaizumi Hajime x Reader

a/n: iwa-chan being your ex is so painful and numbing

huhuhu angst isnt my forte but this is an exception bc chi is my sista

anon request: ex-boyfriend/childhood friend iwaizumi would be super angsty but i have no idea what they’d fight about ,, now imagine if after being kitaichi’s manager/medic, reader becomes karasuno’s medic/temporary manager (until kiyoko got recruited),, then she couldn’t come to the seijoh practice match so she has no idea her team fought her ex,,, only to find out during inter-high and everyone’s like wtf??? that spiky haired ace is your ex?? meanwhile kageyama’s like “yall didn’t know?” — chi

ong this finna be painful

its always been the three of you

with living across the oikawas came great perks

even way before you could remember, you were always with the 2 other boys: your neighbor across your house, tooru, and his best friend who practically lived there, hajime

hajime first saw you when you were covered in dirt after you were trying to catch a butterfly for tooru at the back and oikawa pushed you out of the way into a puddle of mud when he saw a bug

iwa stared at you then immediately said ‘my name is iwaijumi hajime. i think youre really pretty’

yep thats really how it went

and poor babie didnt know how to pronounce his ‘z’s yet so it sounds like ‘j’s :(

while tooru liked you because you werent like other girls who stayed inside and played dolls instead playing outside

you played with him at his back yard with the volleyball he owned and always made him laugh and have fun

iwa liked you because you didnt shy away from bugs, instead you were braver than tooru and even helped iwa look for any beetles and caught them for him to keep as pets

they liked you because you were like them

you were like one of the bois

but that kinda hurt you in the future

as you all grew up, you started going through yanno teenager things

like you started to have crushes

specifically on your best friend, iwaizumi hajime

thankfully tooru didnt see you like that and still saw you as one of the bois and saw you as that annoying twin sister

but unfortunately, iwa did too

every time you made an effort to do something to emphasize that you were, hello, a girl, he would laugh and tease you

‘hehe i didnt think you even knew what a dress was!’

was his comment when you came over wearing a yellow sundress with flats

tooru, who you shared these secrets with, gave you a worried glance but you smiled, covering up the hurt

‘meh. my mom forgot to dry my clothes so i had to wear these old clothes’

no, they werent old

they were just bought yesterday with the intention of finally being recognized as girl and complimented

but the person it was for, couldnt even be bothered to remember that you werent just one of the boys and that you possibly wanted to be told that you were pretty or cute

your other best friend noticed your quietness and he stood up from his crouching position and placed a hand on your shoulder, making you look at him

your teary eyes made him sigh but he grinned at you

‘its really pretty, y/n-chan! you should wear it more often! pretty things deserve to be seen and complimented’

god why couldnt you have a crush on oikawa tooru instead

why did it have to be towards the boy who was too caught up with catching bugs and playing ball to ever see you differently and has never said a single praise towards you?

‘what do you think, iwa-chan? isnt she pretty?’

oikawa hinted but hajime remained his eyes on the tv as the players hit the ball, too distracted to even be bothered to look at you

‘she looks the same’

he mumbled and your nose stung and eyes watered, looking down to hide the wobbling of your lips

‘its okay, kawa-chan. can i wear your clothes for now? i dont like this dress thats why i never wore it’

oikawa tried to stop you but you were already straight up the stairs and towards his room

he angrily stomped over to iwa and slapped his arm, startling the other boy and him snarling in pain

‘what the-’

‘youre so dumb. youre so mean. i wonder where she went wrong and what she saw. seriously’

he ranted and moved to sit back on the floor but not before kicking iwaizumi, making him fall on his side

‘OI KUSOKA-’

‘so whos winning?’

your voice interrupted iwa’s mid-scream and he looked up from the floor to see you wearing an alien hoodie and a pair of basketball shorts that were a little too loose so they drooped by your knees

your originally curled and elegantly braided hair was now pulled up into a bun by a scrunchie that you left around the house from years ago

there was a bit of redness around your eyes and iwa scrambled up to check if you were okay since your face looked swollen

‘oi, did you eat something weird? your face is all red so youre probably having a reaction’

he fretted and you watched as his hands glided across your face and held you by the shoulders to take a closer look

‘yea, a reaction from a bad reaction’

thankfully iwa was too busy checking to hear oikawa snarkily whisper and you sent him a glare that made him quiet down

‘haji-kun, im fine’

you dismissed and side stepped to go sit next to oikawa, completely brushing him off

now iwa was confused

you would usually smile up at him, say ‘aw~ are you worried about me, haji-kun?’ then skip over

not frown and act so coldly

‘oi, y/n, what-’

‘lets go to the bakery! theres a sale going on there!’

oikawa shouted which made you jolt in surprise

he knew of his best friend’s beginning interrogation but he knew you were too upset to be bothered by hajime’s questions

‘they have a buy one get one sale on milk bread! and those-those treats you like! theyre on sale too!’

omg oikawa is a real one 🥺

oikawa blinked harshly at you to go along with the act and you stuttered and nodded

‘uh-eung! yea!’

that was probably the moment that iwaizumi started noticing

except he thought it was a pining between his best friends rather than you towards him

ofc iwa was a loyal friend

he thought that you and oikawa were two people who were crushing on each other yet too afraid to say anything

tbh he shouldve seen this coming because duh you were an incredibly pretty girl and oikawa was the handsomest guy in the whole area!

it was almost,,, natural for you both to gravitate towards each other

maybe thats why,,,

he started to distance himself to give you both the space and want without him in between

maybe thats why,,,

he started to feel these feelings of,, jealousy?? like he started to feel a little scared and honestly he wasnt sure who to be jealous of bc he knew once you started dating, you’d both be too busy to hang out with him

maybe thats why,,,

he was no longer your friend

iwaizumi hajime became a simple stranger you would just pass by in the hall

it happened around the 2nd year of middle school

you and oikawa were still close friends but you have drifted away into not being as close while you and iwaizumi became,,,, distant

basically strangers

the boy you used to dream about when you were 8 and dreamt of marrying once you were old enough

he was no longer him

before, you and iwa were actually really close without oikawa

like you would hang out when oikawa was too busy with takeru

you both would go to the arcade and play games with no fear of oikawa whining and complaining to take turns

you had a lot of fun together and yet, all of a sudden, everything stopped

because iwa knew how,,, possessive oikawa was

he thought that if he were to continue being friends with you, he would risk losing his best friend out of jealousy or misunderstandings and he didnt want that precious bond to be ruined by a girl

even if that girl,,,

was you

thats why it was so awkward when you came over to oikawa’s house after so long and seeing him there, eating breakfast in the kitchen

your best friend didnt want to tell you that iwa spent the night bc quite frankly, oikawa was already fed up with this

you think he didnt know?

you think he didnt know that iwa distanced himself due to an unknown misunderstanding?

you think he didnt know that you also distanced yourself due to being hurt as he casted you aside?

and oikawa was also worried

he didnt want to ever bring up your name with iwa bc to be honest, he didnt think iwa even liked you all that much

he thought that iwa only tolerated you for so long bc you were the only girl who wasnt in love with oikawa and knew you long enough to be comfortable w you

but babie oiks is misunderstood that :(

he didnt want to ever bring up his name with you bc he knew how sensitive it was for you and how sad and pained you were when he suddenly stopped even replying to your texts

one time when you cornered him, he looked angry and gently pushed you back and quickly walked away

no he was scared that oikawa could see you both and misunderstand

‘just,,, stay away from me, okay? its better this way’

god you wanted to scream at him and shout at him and punch him but he kept silent and refused to answer your questions and refused to acknowledge your existence

you were so confused and you were just so hurt and eventually, you became indifferent to him and treated him the same way

anyways

you stepped into the house, not even bothering to shout your arrival and quickly wandered through the hallway before turning the corner to go to the kitchen

but you stopped, seeing the familiar hair with olive eyes eating breakfast on the kitchen island, also stopping with his chopsticks halfway to his mouth at the sight of you

your gazes clashed and you blinked before your lips formed into a thin line, turning and going to the fridge and look for food

iwa wasnt surprised

he figured you were both getting closer to dating and you were already basically living in his house

it all makes sense

BRUH THEYVE BEEN FRIENDS SINCE THEY WERE LTR BORN LIKE BLS THEYRE JUST SIBLINGS

MAKE IT MAKE SENSE

‘h-how are you’

he mumbled, trying to fix the awkward silence while cursing inside of how long oikawa was taking to shit

you hummed, taking a water bottle and slamming the fridge door shut, harder than necessary

‘oh, now you see me?’

you really didnt mean for it to be a snarky comment but it came out before you even realized what you said

he winced

‘listen, im-’

‘oh? youre here, y/n-chan!’

oikawa’s voice cut him off and he returned back to his bowl of rice, leaving you standing there furrowing your brows

you shrugged, already knowing that hajime was like this, so you turned to look at oikawa with a wrinkled nose at the sound of the toilet flushing

‘tooru, did you drink straight milk again? you know how it makes your stomach upset’

you chided and tooru turned red at the implication of his dookie

‘o-oi! y/n-chan! of course id know if i was lactose intolerant!’

i just think how funny it would be like the irony of his love for milk bread yet being lactose intolerant at the same time

he huffed and you nodded but not exactly believing him

‘kay kay’

you teased and walked to the living room but oikawa caught you in a headlock and he ruffled your hair while you complained and whined to let you go

you were giggling as tooru was giving you noogies, feeling the tension leave your body

all while iwa was watching

maybe it was because he stopped hanging out with you and havent seen you like this for almost a year

so carefree and so happy as you scored higher than him at the hoop game and he would begrudgingly let you hug him when he managed to win you a doll from the claw machine

but yea he definitely forgot your smile

he forgot how it looked like bc the last time you met gazes, you sent him a hurt glance and looked away and he knew he deserved that

god he hated it

but no, he was doing this for tooru

he was doing this because his best friend liked someone who actually deserved him

but dear god why did it hurt

iwa was starting to wonder if he made the right choice

he could easily handle you two dating

right?

maybe that was when iwa started to realize,,, he was starting to feel different towards you

the time apart definitely made him remember why he was friends with you

you weren’t like those girls he saw in tv or outside with the frilly clothes and the makeup and the fancy hair

no that wasnt you

you were different

you were too lazy to even pick out a cute outfit, opting for comfort with one of their sweatshirts and sweatpants

you preferred to chase after butterflies rather than sitting inside bc hajime’s adventurous spirit latched itself on to you too

you would usually climb the tree to get the volleyball that got stuck up in the branches bc tooru was too scared of heights and you wanted to prove your strength and capability

god you were so different

what if you liked him instead?

iwa startled himself with that thought in the middle of eating and caused him to choke on his rice

tooru noticed him coughing violently so he grabbed the water bottle from your hand and threw it straight towards the boy

iwa snapped the cap open,not caring where that water came from, and chugged it down before sighing in relief after the quite scary situation

you then realized what happened and you turned red, speedwalking into the living room

oiks totally didnt do that on purpose and he was doing the lenny face at you before switching masks and wearing a worried one for iwa

‘iwa-chan! you need to slow down!’

he chided and iwaizumi yelled at him to be quiet, completely clueless to the fact that he just shared an indirect kiss with you

but you did and lordie did you hate it

from then on,,,

iwa was just seeing you everywhere

iwa saw you from his classroom when you would go hang out with your new friends outside

he noticed you not even being too loud, only speaking up when asked while the others opted to continue talking about nonsense you probably gave no care about with how you secretly rolled your eyes

those moments made him laugh

the next time you both ran into each other was during his morning practice

oikawa phoned you in the morning while you were getting ready, saying he accidentally left his knee pads at home and he was already at school but you werent so he wanted you to bring them to him

you knew damn well that iwaizumi hajime would be there but you didnt care because youre not even friends anymore after he just dropped you like that

YES SISTER WE DESERVE BETTER

so thats why you found yourself pushing the metal gym door open at 6 in the morning and shouting oikawa’s name

his eyes brightened at your voice and he dropped the ball to run towards you by the door

‘oh my god thank you so much, y/n-chan!’

he shouted and hugged you out of excitement while you cringed and hit him to get off of you

‘ew dont touch me trashykawa’

you mumbled and he whined, finally stepping away with a pout

iwa was watching you both from the side and he blinked, wondering if you were trying a new hairstyle

if not, then you changed something bc currently, you practically glowing to him

he watched you scold oikawa for being forgetful and him begging for forgiveness but also thanking you before he was scoldede again by the coach

but the coach was relieved that he could finally play with the proper equipment and not risk anymore injuries

oikawa was already bidding you good bye and you were about to turn to leave when you finally met the many gazes of iwaizumi hajime

your eyebrows unconsciously furrowed together and your lips turned to a frown then you sharply turned and walked through the doors

unbeknownst to him, oikawa watched as his best friend’s face turned hurt at your expression and remained staring at the door you just went out of even when you were already gone

‘iwa-chan, lets get to practice’

after that

iwa has concluded god has decided to be mean to him

bc who was giving him these weird heart attacks and tummy aches at the simple sight of you?

literally he ignored you for a good time yet now hes noticing you again?

what kinda unfairness-

but you proved to accept his previous behavior by not even giving him a single glance anymore

that made him sad so iwa would sometimes stop doing what hes doing so he could freely stare at you laugh at something a classmate said during class

thats totally not creepy iwa lol

he doesnt even know hes doing it sometimes bc hes so absorbed on trying to figure out the answers of his questions

but the worst was when he got caught

you sat at the very front and oikawa and iwa sat at the back

it was lunchtime and you were eating with a few girls and a guy from another class and yall were laughing and talking together

iwa had oikawa and these other guys makki and matsukawa from the class next door to eat lunch with

can i please just dream that our third year seijoh boys were actually friends since the very beginning like pls and thanks

oikawa was rambling about how some girl giving him cookies the other day when he noticed iwa not listening but staring at you while moving his chopsticks around

poor iwa-chan was confused as to how even with messy hair, you still looked beautiful?

like no matter what angle or how you turned, the light always seemed to hit you perfectly to accent out your features

how was that possible?

‘-and she just-iwa-chan? iwaizumi?’

he called out and said boy jolted, eyes widening at the confused, bored, and knowing eyes

‘hm?’

‘oh? were you looking at y/n-chan?’

oikawa teased and the gojira fanboy waved his hands around to deny that statement

but makki chuckled and leaned in

‘hm, wouldnt blame ya. shes really pretty you know? some guy in our class saw the girls ranking and shes in the top 5′

okay iwa was angry

was it because everyone else noticed how pretty you are?

was it because you were part of this list?

was it because his own friend said you were pretty?

why did he even care anyways?!

oikawa smirked at the clenched fist under the table and decided to poke fun even more

‘oh really? well, it doesnt really matter because its always the girl’s decision right? but most of the time, their choice is utter trash’

the meme duo shared a confused look

‘hah? what are you going on about, oikawa’

oikawa internally apologized to you after what hes about to do because hes so tired and exhausted of having to be so careful and walking on eggshells between you two

so he did an oikawa move

‘yanno how y/n-chan and i have been friends since we were little ducklings right? so ages ago, like ages ago, little y/n-chan had a crush on this brute bc for some reason she thought he was brave or something and apparently thats appealing to girls rather than the nice and gentlemanly type. but of course, yanno how this goes, he pooped up and now hes stuck on doing this weird stalking staring thing. right, iwa-chan~?’

okay im sorry i take it back oikawa is a bitch

iwa shook

you,,, had a what on who?!

a crush on him?!

is he the brute?!

so it wasnt oikawa?

it was to him?

then why did you act like that?

why did you both act like that?

‘what’

iwaizumi mumbled and he met oikawa’s pointed gaze

‘hmm,,,, you dont have to worry about it anymore though since theyre not even friends anymore. but listen to me and listen well, makki, mattsun, if you hurt a girl even once, theyre never going to forget it. my sister said that apparently theres this little voice in their head that tells them that theyre going to get hurt again and thats where their trust issues begin to develop and--IWA-CHAN WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!’

iwa was already out of his seat and straight walking towards you and your group before stopping beside your chair

your friends quieted down at the sight of the known boy and you blinked then turned your head to see him, your eyes instantly turning dark and looking away immediately

‘what the hell do you want’

you hissed and natsu almost choked on his rice ball if it wasnt for another girl patting his back

‘it was me, right? all along, not oikawa, but me?’

his meek voice made you look up in confusion

‘what are you talking-’

‘you chose me instead him’

then it was like a click that you realized what he said

‘how did you know’

‘i-i’

he stuttered but was cut off when the teacher finally arrived to announce the end of lunch and iwa was forced to go back to his seat

the whole class time, you would sneak glances back and iwa would be staring at his paper while oikawa would wink at you and give you smirks

OH GOD HE TOLD HIM

after class you stomped up to the brunette haired boy

‘how could you?! why did you tell-’

‘lets talk, y/n? please?’

iwa was holding your arm and you glared at him before turning away and walking away

oikawa patted him on the shoulder in good luck and whispered,

‘get your girl’

the rooftop ledge looked really delicious right now

no words were exchanged so you were both just silent with you staring at him while he was looking off to the side

‘so what? now you know and so what do you want?’

you spoke first and iwa guiltily met your eyes

‘everything was,,, a mess. i misunderstood and i didnt communicate and i,,, messed up’

he mumbled the last part but you caught it perfectly causing you to scoff

‘damn right you did. so now you know and then youre going to do the cliche thing they do in those dramas where you magically profess your love for me and-’

‘hey y/n lets date’

you froze and looked at him shocked with wide eyes and jaw dropped

‘excuse me? who are you to say that?!’

you shrieked

‘first you think i have some big crush on tooru and this caused you to basically drop me like a damn pencil and second youre asking me to date you? iwaizumi hajime i thought you were always the smarter one. what the hell are you spouting you damn imbecile-’

iwa did the only thing he thought of

he quickly leaned forward and pecked your lips

he saw some guy do it in a telenovela that his mom watched a week ago and that was how the girl got silent so iwa thought it would be smart to shut you up that way

and it worked

bc you were so conflicted: angry, confused, sad, happy

you was the whole range of emotions in one second

‘i was stupid. and i was dumb. i wanted to give you and shittykawa space because i thought he liked you and he would be mad and misunderstand if we continued hanging out without him. but you shouldve told me you liked me, baka. maybe i wouldve come to like you back’

iwa rambled but your eyes watered and you huffed, slapping him across the face but pulled his collar to kiss him again

tbh iwa was shook bc he got 2 kisses in a row today and hes never been kissed before and its from this really pretty girl

‘how dare you kiss me and still not like me’

you seethed when you pulled away

but iwa held your hands

‘im starting to come to. give me time and i’ll accept your confession’

and give him time you did bc you finally were able to try and mend that friendship again and soon, you were already starting to fall back in love with him

but iwa also

during the end of your 2nd year, iwa nervously tugged you to the rooftop and you smirked

‘what? you gonna profess your love for me haji-kun?’

you teased and expected him to laugh and smack you gently but he didnt

he turned red and he looked down at his shoes as he magically produced a flower out of nowhere

‘please accept me, y/n!’

he shouted while holding out the single white carnation

your eyebrows scrunched and you grabbed the flower from his hands before punching him weakly

‘stupid! stupid haji-kun! i already accepted you! since we were five! how could you not see my feelings’

you whimpered, trying to hide the blush on your face but he smothered you to a hug, making you both topple over in the process

you had the cliched term of ‘summer love’

of course you still hung out with tooru but you both would hang out other days just you both

like you and iwa liked going over to some old playground by your house and you both would watch the sky on top of the slide assembly while talking about stupid stuff and the future

‘haji-kun, do you know what you want to be when youre old?’

you asked and he turned his head to look at you but you were focused on the stars

‘gojira’

he simply replied and you giggled, reaching over to hit his chest

‘baka. you cant be gojira-san’

iwa found himself giggling with you before he reached down to softly interwine your fingers and hold them up to look at them

‘hm, i dont really know. maybe a volleyball player. or someone in the volleyball team, i dont know’

you hummed, knowing him and tooru’s shared love for the sport

‘i wanna be a doctor. i want to save lives and help people and make money too! my mothers friend offered to intern me but apparently im still too young’

you pouted

iwa listened to you but then a lightbulb rang in his head

‘oi, y/n’

he started and you looked at him

‘you can be our manager. or medic. or doctor person. that bastard is going to push himself even harder because naoki-senpai gave him that damn position and he might kill himself trying to beat that farmer dude. besides, shittykawa is going to be the captain next year and i’ll be vice so youd easily get it anyways. so you in?’

you blinked at him before breaking out to a smile

‘eung! i wanna see my baby play what he loves!’

iwa’s face contorted to disgust

‘bABy?! iM nOt a BABY! im A mAn!! mAN!!’

‘mhm, okay. my mans, haji bara arms is my mans’

your relationship is very balanced with the perfect ratio of crackhead and seriousness and understanding bc as we ALL KNOW EVERYTHING STARTED W A MISUNDERSTANDING

like if he accidentally said something that hurt your feelings like that dress incident from years ago btw you brought it up to him and told him you were practically traumatized by that and he kept on apologizing and appearing at your doorstep with a white carnation in apology you would gently tell him bc communication is K E Y and he would tell you sorry and you guys would understand and make up

you guys were so lovey dovey that ltr oikawa would fake gag and throw up to the side when he catches you guys even doing things like holding hands

like bls he sees that flesh to flesh contact and he wretches his breakfast

‘ew, its the settling down for me’

‘its the flatness of the ass for me’

you stuck your tongue out while he pouted and iwa looked so proud like oml

you guys were still at the honeymoon phase where everything was peaches and rainbows and it continued until your 3rd year

as mentioned above, iwa basically gave you the managerial position

like yall were walking to school during the first day talking about how worried yall were at passing your classes when suddenly he was all like ‘ill see you in the gym later?’

you smiled and blinked confusingly

‘hm? you want a cheerleader there, baby?’

he flushed red at the nickname and furrowed his eyebrows

‘baka, stop calling me that’

you giggled and dodged his gentle smack but he grabbed your hand and pulled you close to his chest

‘i thought we already agreed that you would be our medic slash manager? i mean, it could give you experience for the future right?’

you rested your chin on his front to look up at him and your face held a teasing smirk

‘hmmm~~~ haji-kun just admit it. you want me to be there to cheer you on~’

you teased and nuzzled your cheek on him

iwa scoffed but he couldnt help a soft smile appearing

‘i mean-yea, but its for the future so ill help you every way i can’

‘oya? the future? will you marry me in the future, haji-kun?’

‘MARRY?! HOW DID YOU GET MARRY OUT OF THAT, BRAT’

‘AAWWWWW DONT BE SUCH A TSUNTSUN HAJI-KU-ACKDKJFSLKJNOT THE HAIR!!!’

sure enough you were at the gym after school

the coaches knew you werent a fangirl of oikawa bc hes seen you since the very beginning and oikawa clears you are actually a sister to him and you were fit for the job

ofc hes captain and someone as good as oikawa was going to get what he wants

the gym was full of newbies and recruits hoping to get into the powerhouse team and your eyes scanned to find those ridiculously pretty olive eyes that belonged to your beloved-

‘HAJI-KUN~~!!!’

you waved and shouted loudly, gaining his and everyone else’s attention as well

the underclassmen cooed and awed at you bc their senpai who was famous for being really pretty was in the building

‘waaaa its l/n-senpai’

��shes so pretty’

‘oMG shes righT iN FroNT oF me!!’

yea you get the gist

the poor ‘haji-kun’ was shrinking under the attention and was growling at oikawa’s teasing look but he begrudgingly held his arms out for you to run into them and snuggle into him

‘hmmm i missed you, haji-kun. im really sad we’re in different classes this year. but then again! i can be here with you!’

you pouted and he ruffled your hair affectionately

‘why else do you think i offered it brat’

oikawa rolled his eyes and gagged before taking your arm to the coach so he could sort you out

‘honestly! not in front of the children, okay?!’

but everything was quickly resolved and you were finally officially their manager/medic

you did managerial duties and you were the go-to when someone falls harshly or gets hurt in any way

in between homework, school, reading medical books, and practice, you and iwa havent spent a lot of time together and tbh that was quite straining your relationship??

like it was something that you saw coming and you both even had a talk about it but you still feel like you didnt prepare enough when it did come

one day, it was monday and there was no practice so you and iwa were walking home together

he squeezed your hand occassionally and you would sing and hum while walking

and omg his heart would balloon up when you would smile up at him and giggle when you would catch him staring

he honestly thought youd both hang out and just lay on the couch, snuggle, yanno the routine

but once you pulled out your textbooks, notebooks, and pens, he was confused

like he even held your hands and stopped you from pulling anything else out

‘y/n? i thought we were,, watching a movie or something?’

you blinked and shook your head

‘i need to study for a test and i still need to memorize how to treat a sprain, haji-kun. there’s more important things to do right now. maybe later?’

more important things?!

more important than showering you with love?

more important than even spending a second with him?

now, dont get him wrong, iwaizumi hajime was by no means a clingy and possessive boyfriend

he understood the boundaries and he understood the priorities

but dear god its been WEEKS since he even hung out w you since your entire schedule seemed to throw him out of loop and acted as if he didnt exist

and now, he was aggrivated and irritated and he wanted nothing but to just cuddle his girlfriend

you noticed his huff and pout but he remained silent

you quirked an eyebrow and placed your pen down

‘haji? whats wrong?’

his eyes snapped to you and you knew now he was angry

‘oh? were you able to spare a few seconds for dear old me?’

you were taken aback and you knew there was a fight brewing so you hid your growing irritation and calmly put your things aside

‘hajime, what are you on about?’

you pried and he looked shocked, almost offended

‘what am i on about? what am i on about? y/n, do you know the last time i even came over? the last time i held you and just talked?’

his voice got louder by every word and you quickly stood up

‘dont you dare raise your voice at me, hajime. if we have a problem, we talked over it calmly. we dont yell or shout, nothing gets resolved. we talked about this’

but he scoffed

‘talked? when was that? when did we actually just talk? hm? because I sure as hell dont remember it’

youve only seen hajime angry once and it was when you lied to him to go spend time with oikawa

okay in your defense, oikawa was having a panic attack and he begged you not to tell iwa because he didnt want to be scolded by iwa even though you kept telling him that iwa wasnt like that

and theres a reason as to why its only been a one-time thing because iwa was known to have patience that was as long as the damn nile river

except for oikawa bc it seems oikawa just cuts that patience by a million

and when he finally snaps, its when he couldnt take it anymore and he finally gets loose

when iwaizumi hajime was angry, you really done it

you didnt really know how you handled that anger so you were at a loss and you were feeling conflicted and pained at the way he looked at you

‘h-hajime,,,’

you started and he looked at you expectantly

‘well? when did we last actually talk outside the school premises y/n?’

there was that inner witty voice of yours that wanted to say ‘right now?’ but you held it in bc he was completely serious

‘hajime, please understand. i-i dont want to let anyone down! my grades! the team! i-’

‘but what about me, y/n?’

he tiredly asked

‘do those things-those people- matter more than me? and i really really dont want to ask that but im so so confused y/n’

despite sounding manipulative, you knew iwa was feeling defeated and he couldnt help but ask those questions and sound so desperate

so you scrambled to sit next to him on the couch and held him against you

‘of course you matter to me-haji you mean everything to me, you understand? god, if an adult hears me theyd think im crazy but i love you, hajime. i love you and im so sorry if i ever made you feel that way because i really didnt mean to, okay? im so sorry’

you sobbed and he turned to fully envelop you into his arms and he sighed contently, remembering how good it felt to have you right there

‘no, im sorry, doll. i was being clingy and i didnt mean to lash out, i-’

you slightly let go and cupped his face

‘nonono you were perfectly valid. what you felt was perfectly reasonable. i havent been a good girlfriend lately, huh?’

you sadly smiled but he kissed you, holding you even closer

‘youre always a good one to me. always. just with a not good schedule but we can fix that, right?’

SORRY I REALLY DONT KNOW HOW TO WRITE A FIGHTING SCENE BC ITS ANGSTY AND I DONT DO WELL WITH ANGST BC IT MAKES ME CRY 😭

tbh that was really your only big fight

even when you guys graduated middle school, you both were still quite happy and you both worked hard to make time for each other

HOWEVER

when high school arrived, you both had chosen an extremely hard decision

you chose to go to karasuno while oikawa and iwa went to seijoh

which was a,,,, hard and difficult decision

in fact, you both didnt have a fight per se, just a disagreement that ended in like 30 minutes lmao

tbh its so scary and concerning of how rarely you both have bad times and how quickly it gets resolved

BUT THEN AGAIN THIS IS AN ANGST REQUEST SO ILL OF COURSE BRING IN THE SADNESS

you were busy with karasuno and you were actually taking college courses since you wanted to have a good record if you ever wanted to get into a medical field

that meant you had a lot of homework and most of your time was spent with schoolwork or interning for that family friend mentioned earlier

and you were also a manager for the volleyball team bc karasuno is a butt and they require you to have an after school club

so that meant,,,

no time for iwa

and fate just so happens to hate you bc the days you did have off, he would be busy with volleyball and he wouldnt be able to spend time with you

even weekends were like that

eventually, you both went for 2 months with no contact, just a few text messages and calls

and that strained your former strong relationship

and you knew that iwa was getting angry again with how he even typed his responses

‘want me to bring over snacks for the team?’

‘its okay. wouldnt want you to waste time or anything’

like that type of bull

you were getting increasingly worried because you havent had a good proper time to talk to him about it and you didnt want to fight over the phone

your best friend, kiyoko, noticed your anxious ticks and she snapped you out of your current daydream

‘hey? y/n? you okay?’

she gently asked and you blinked before nodding

‘mhm. just,,, thinking’

but she didnt buy that lie because you went back to chewing your lips and eyes even watering

‘i can revise your notes for you, y/n. and the team isnt doing anything big so i can handle it. you just go see him after school bc i cant handle you being sad anymore’

kiyoko gently smiled and you almost cried bc finally! you were able to clear your schedule enough to go visit your boyfriend

at the end of the school day, you bolted out of there and you were running and huffing all the way to seijoh bc you really wanted to talk to him as soon as possible

the gym was clear in view and you smiled, looking forward to seeing your beloved boy, when you saw him and oikawa being surrounded by girls

now keep in mind, youve suffered through middle school with oikawa and you were his best friend and has known him since you were a toddler

so you know of his looks and the attraction it brought him from all the females

so that didnt really bother you

but what bothered you was the horde of girls that stuck on to your boyfriend and he didnt even look bothered

just,,, blank

not even pushing away or feeding into their actions

just,,, standing there

‘haji?’

you called out and as if he had a built-in sensor for you, his ears twitched and he swiveled to look at you

‘y/n’

he breathed out and you smiled gently

iwa quickly moved away from the girls and he grabbed your hand so you both could go somewhere else to talk privately

the back of the gym was quiet and you leaned against the wall, iwa joining you shortly

‘how-how are you?’

you asked and he scoffed, totally surprising you

‘is this how we are y/n? asking each other questions as if we’re friends who are meeting for the first time in a while? wait--actually we are arent we?’

you grimaced and looked to the side, knowing he starts his stages of anger with being passive aggressive

‘haji,, please understand’

you pleaded and swiveled to stand in front of him

iwa didnt meet your eyes, instead shoving his hands in his pants pockets and eyes trained to his shoes as he kicked rocks

‘y/n, ive been trying,, for months ive been understanding. please dont ask me to understand anymore’

he snipped and you sniffed

‘im doing this because-because my grades are starting to matter! my future is resting on these years! i have to-’

‘dont you think i know that?!’

he cut you off harshly

your eyes were shaking at his attempt to calm himself down and his trembling hands

‘dont you think i know that you are doing this for that? because ive known you since i was five y/n and i know you would push everything-everyone- else aside to reach a damn goal of yours. no matter the cost, as long as you get it, right? well youve always been like that and somehow i still accepted that yet years later here we are’

iwa waved his arms around to accentuate his point and hurt was bubbling inside your chest at a subtle jab at your flaw

‘well im sorry mr. volleyball ace player! im not talented in any area so i have to depend on my studies to get me a future! so fck me for trying to survive and create a life for us!’

‘us?! how is this for us?! y/n we cant even last a single year being apart and youre already thinking ahead of the future?!’

‘im doing this for you! for us! just wait hajime! we will be happy-’

‘I DONT CARE IF ITS FOR THE FCKING FUTURE! I WANT TO BE HAPPY WITH YOU RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW! AND WHY DOES THE FCKING FUTURE MATTER SO DAMN MUCH WHEN WE CANT EVEN-’

‘BECAUSE I LOVE YOU AND I WANT TO BE WITH YOU!’

you shrieked

‘HOW CAN YOU LOVE ME IF YOURE NOT LOVING ME?!’

he huffed and harshly wiped away tears that fell

your lips trembled, hands shakingly reaching out to grasp his arms

‘ha-hajime,, don-’

‘should we break up?’

was he asking you this right now?

seriously?

‘what?’

you whispered and he finally looked up to let you see his pained eyes

‘y/n do you know what day it was yesterday?’

he asked and you blinked, looking everywhere as you tried to remember any important events

‘t-tuesday?’

that seemed to snap his patience

with an angry grunt, he turned to punch the wall and crouch to hide his face in his hands

‘damn it, y/n’

he whimpered and your heart broke as you could hear his cries

then it clicked

anniversary

it was your 2nd anniversary

and you completely missed it

completely forgotten

you shrunk back and let out a cry before placing a hand over your mouth to muffle your cries

‘ha-haji-’

you sniffled and you tried to go closer to him but he wiped his eyes and stood back up

‘y/n lets break up’

iwa requested with a cracked smile

your eyes widened and you ran to his chest, wrapping your arms around him as if you let go, he would disappear

‘haji, we can talk about this! we cant-please dont do this-i can fix this-’

‘we will only hurt ourselves even more if we continue this. i dont want us to hurt anymore y/n. so please, for once, listen to me’

your heart shattering cries filled your space and he didnt think it was this hard until he finally said it

it was a decision that he has been hanging around for a while and even consulted oikawa about it

‘iwa-chan, if you love y/n so much, its best to let her go. dont make you both suffer anymore’

‘i cant-hajime youre it for me-please dont leave-’

you hiccuped and continued to sob

but iwa remained a pillar and squeezed you tightly against him

‘darling i believe we were meant to be. but we just did it all wrong. when the time is right, lets start over again’

he whispered, finally breaking down with you in his arms

-------

iwaizumi hajime became a taboo word for you

even with oikawa, he swore and vowed to never say either of your names and made sure that you would not be around the area when iwa would come over

like even when he knew iwa would just stay inside, he would be constantly on the lookout to make sure you both didnt see each other

the last time was when you both saw each other in the morning as you exited your house to walk to school

it must’ve been a few months after the breakup and even oikawa felt the raw pain hovering in the air

it was suffocating and oikawa had to motion you to walk because if you both stayed even a second, someone-or both- would start crying

you continued like that for years until you reached your third year

you continued being part of the volleyball team as the medic while kiyoko was the manager

the new recruits were causing up a storm and you were particularly fond of your kita kouhai kageyama tobio

‘kageyama? kageyama tobio?’

you asked once you caught sight of the familiar looking blueberry

he looked up and recognized you as his former manager

‘l/n-senpai!’

he shouted and you ran up to give the boy a hug

‘gosh! youre so tall now! i remembered when you were wee tall!’

you teased and ruffled his hair

‘uh-you know him, y/n?’

suga asked and you nodded

‘eung! we went to the same middle school and i was a manager there’

‘she was friends with iwa-’

ope

something flashed in your eyes

kiyoko knew that name bc of how you were so depressed about it for 2 years and she started shouting random nonsense, scaring the 2nd and first years

‘y/n! we got new medical tape!’

she sang out and you perked up

‘finally?! we dont have to use duct tape anymore?!’

you excitedly ran over and everyone was both shook that kiyoko was loud and two, you were actually excited over medical tape

kageyama shrugged and continued on training

he kinda figured something happened so he never said anything or asked you anything in fear of upsetting you

and when it was announced that you were going to a practice match with seijoh, kiyoko actually told you she would cover it to make sure you dont see him there

‘its fine, y/n, i got you’

but ofc, you couldnt skip inter high

ltr an event when anyone in the team could get injured so you forced yourself to just ignore it and go

you did a good job of hiding whenever he was in view until the time they actually faced each other

you were walking alongside kiyoko and settling some things down at the bench when you felt his stare

you grimaced at his intense stare and the entire team mistakenly took it as him being interested in you

‘HAH?! LOOK AWAY YOU BEANSPROUT!’

noya growled

‘YEA! DONT LOOK!’

ofc hinata echoed

the 3 seijoh third years exchanged looks of unease when iwa sighed and looked away

‘oi! dont do that, boke!’

kageyama chided and hit the orange boy with a water bottle at the head

hinata whined and glared at him

‘that porcupine was looking at l/n-senpai! he wants to steal her!’

‘boke-’

‘doesnt matter anyways. we broke up ages ago’

you tried to say it jokingly but they couldnt miss the crack in your voice

‘hah?! he broke up with you?! you?! goddess l/n-san?!’

tanaka raged and noya had his own face of shock

the famous seijoh ace dated you?!

this handsome bara arms muscle buff man had the priviledge to date you and yet broke up with you?!

‘yall didnt know that?’

kageyama questioned and everyone glared at him

‘how do you know’

‘i just did. i didnt want to say anything for this same reason that you guys didnt know and she wouldnt want her business out there’

he simply replied and continued filing his nails

you looked up and smiled

‘it doesnt matter anymore. it was years ago so its fine’

‘L/N-SAN WE WILL AVENGE YOU!’

‘WE WILL! WE WILL!!’

the three stooges swore and you smiled softly, ruffling each boy’s hair

‘then go out there and make me proud’

but we know how this goes

they lost and you were so devastated for the others and you dropped your bag to go and comfort a crying hinata

‘sshh, dont cry dont cry. im right here’

you cooed and he accepted your embrace, hugging you tightly

once he finally calmed down, you were able to get him to a good enough condition to walk to the bus to go home

you went back to get your bag when you found something on top of it

a single white carnation

and a small ripped piece of paper that said,

‘my name is iwaizumi hajime. i think youre really pretty’

a/n: iknowiknowiknow i died but im not back to life and this request was lowkey difficult and i dont think i did a good job w it because angst always gets too angsty for me but i couldnt resist giving this a sad ending like bls!!! and uwu im still working on that oikawa route bc ya girl cant decide how angsty she wants it to beeee and i have like 4 different versions of the route in my drafts hehehe,,,, but i hope yall liked this and uwu ive never been in a serious relationship before so i wouldnt know what to fight about and came up with this:(

633 notes · View notes

bebepac · 4 years ago

Text

The Double Date Mistake?

I am participating in @wackydrabbles prompt # 92 “I don’t think that was meant to go there.” will appear in bold.

This is also chapter 2 of The Meet: To catch up on what you’ve been missing of the Meet so far Please click: The Meet Masterlist

Original Post Date: 05/01/2021 at 3:15PM

The Book: TRR

The Pairing: Liam x F!OC (Liam x Jilian)

Word Count: 1948

Summary: Jilian goes on a double date with Bebe and meets Leo for the very first time. Jilian and Bebe share how they first met each other to the guys.

Warnings: Sexual innuendos. Profanity.

Leo and Liam belong to pixelberry, Jilian belongs to @queenjilian borrowed for the duration of this series. All others are my own to help us tell the story.

“And done. He has your number now Jili. Now fly my little birdies fly.”

She thought he would text right away but he didn’t. The whole way to Bebe’s apartment the twenty minute drive Jili’s phone was silent.

Bebe looked at Jili as she glanced at her phone. What the actual hell?

She texted Jilian.

“Bebe why the hell are you texting me? I’m sitting right next to you?”

“I was just making sure your phone was on.”

“I mean he’s still working Bebe. He can’t just drop everything and just start texting away.”

“The hell he can’t. What in the actual fuck is wrong with you bruh?” Bebe grumbled as she angrily typed on her phone.

“Wing Woman are you trying to crash this plane?”

“The mother hasn’t even taken off yet with you two trying to pilot it. I’m gonna need you to get your life together Jili.”

The driver pulled to a stop. “Damn I really wanted to see how this turned out.”

Bebe got out of the car in a huff.

“I’ll let you know.” Jili called out the window to her.

Jilian wasn’t going to let it stress her out. He was still at work. She knew her job got busy at times, and she couldn’t just sit on her phone and do nothing. As she was walking up the stairs to scan her door key fob, the phone rang.

It was a local number she didn’t recognize.

“Hello?”

“Jilian. It’s Liam.”

“Hi Liam.”

“I apologize for not texting or calling sooner. Things got busy at work.”

“Oh I figured that was what happened.”

"Bebe is something else. I feel a little attacked. I can tell it's from a place of love though."

"She's my best friend Liam. My true sister from another mister."

"So it's safe to assume you are single?" Liam inquired.

"I am, and for you the same?"

"Yes Jilian I am. Is it forward of me to say maybe we can change that for each other. I would really like to see you again. I'm off next Friday would you be free then?"

Jilian sighed.

"Friday is my date night."

"Oh. I just assumed you being single you weren’t seeing anybody even casually."

"With Bebe. We restaurant hop. We're self proclaimed foodies.

Do you have any friends maybe we could double?”

“My brother, both him and Bebe have big personalities, I think they’d really get along. Think she would be okay with that?”

“Yeah I think I could convince her.”

They continued to talk, and about everything under the sun. Liam was funny and witty and kept her attention.

She began to realize how much she had in common with the charming Liam Rys.

She had cuddled into her bed under her covers laughing and chatting with him. She finally rolled over realizing it was almost dawn.

“Oh my God! Is that the sun?!?!?!” she shrieked, surprised into the phone.

“I’m so sorry Jilian I completely lost track of time.”

“I have to go, I have to be at work in forty five minutes!!!”

Jilian said her goodbyes to Liam and hurried to work.

Right when Jilian was sitting in her office reading over her chart for her first patient’s checkup, there was a delivery.

A large coffee drink had been delivered to her with a sweet gooey cinnamon bun.

“Gift for you Jilian Winchester.”

Liam was really sweet.

She texted him thank you.

He had let her know he had an extra espresso shot added to her coffee.

Liam was a lifesaver.

*^*^*^*^* The Double Date *^**^*^*^*

When Jili and Bebe got to the restaurant Liam and Leo were already seated at the table both stood to greet them.

Liam softly kissed Jili’s cheek.

Bebe glanced at Leo. He was cute, but he was probably about five inches shorter than Bebe, not to mention Bebe was wearing heels making her tower over Leo.

Liam changed the subject breaking the ice between everyone, and the conversation between the couples started flowing.

Jilian slipped in the subject of Liam and Leo honestly not looking much like each other.

“We’re half brothers, we have different mothers. But don’t get it twisted Bebe. I can scale you like Mount Everest. Taller women don’t intimidate me one bit.”

“Um….thank you for that blatant honesty…. Jili will you accompany me to the restroom please?”

“Excuse us for a moment.” Jili smiled politely.

“Absolutely not Jili!!!!!” Bebe was adamant when the door to the bathroom closed.

“Bebe I didn’t know! I swear when he said older brother, I was thinking he looked like him. You would think older brothers are taller, bigger, and wiser. He is funny though. You two do have similar personalities. Maybe try to focus on that Bee. Let’s just try to have a fun time. You don’t have to see Leo again. But I know I want to see Liam again. I like him.”

“You owe me big for this!!!”

Both women come back to the table. Their drink orders had arrived. Bebe takes a long sip on her drink.

“That’s what I’m talking about!” Leo smiled. “A girl after my own heart.”

“How did you and Bebe meet Jilian?”

“We actually met in NOLA. We were both presenting at a medical conference. Bebe for the Pharma side, because she’s a pharmacist, and me for medical for being a nurse practitioner focused in the at risk population.”

Leo eyes flit to Bebe.

“So you’re a drug dealer?”

Bebe smiled. “ Legal Drug Dealer. Yep, that’s what I call myself. I’m slinging pills to pay the bills.”

“I can dig it.”

“We met the night before our conference began, in a bar.”

When Jilian walked into the bar she noticed her right away. There was a woman at the bar, drinking her drink telling what appeared to be a funny story that had multiple people’s attention. All were laughing with her. She had to be a local. Jili thought.

She had strings of beads around her neck.

“What can I get ya?” the bartender asked.

She looked at Bebe. “I want whatever she’s having.” Bebe was the life of the party.

“Well I did a little pre-gaming at the drive through daiquiri shop though.

But mostly Hurricanes. Get her a Hurricane Sal.”

The bartender winked at Bebe.

“Don’t skimp on the good stuff either!” She yelled out.

Jilian’s eyes widened when the bartender brought her the drink.

Bebe held up her glass to clink with Jilian’s glass.

“Laissez le bon temps rouler!!!!!” The crowd screamed in agreement at Bebe’s declaration.

“What?”

“LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL!!!!!”

Jilian took a long drink of the cocktail. No wonder.

“Yep! You like it. I’m Bebe, what’s your name?”

“Jilian.”

“I’m gonna call you Jili. What brings you to NOLA?”

“Work, a conference.”

“Bleh you said the “W.” word. That’s not existing in my life right now. We’re here, we’re alive, no regrets Jili. Let your hair down and enjoy yourself. I mean literally. That bun is a buzz kill.”

Jili pulled the pins out of her hair shaking out her locks.

“So much better!!!! You’re a babe!!! See they’re already looking at you differently. We’re not interested though. Unless they’re buying more drinks.”

Jili glanced at the guys that were now looking in her direction.

“You’ve got a lot of bead necklaces going on.” Jili commented.

“There are two ways to get beads in NOLA. Buy them or earn them.”

Jili looked at Bebe and raised her eyebrow with a smile.

“Let me guess, your ass hasn’t spent a dime tonight.”

Bebe took a long sip of her hurricane.

“Nope. Not a single dime. Including alcohol. I'll tell you what Jili. Life’s too short. I’m not going to regret any of my choices. I spent a year in Costa Rica, living my life Pura Vida.”

“Pure Life.” Jilian smiled. Bebe was a carefree spirit, and people gravitated to her.

“We’re only here for a blink Jili. How do you want your story to be told?”

She decided to throw caution to the wind and party the night away with Bebe.

Jilian’s alarm went off the next morning. She was incredibly hung over as she tried to pull herself together.

She had a random memory of her and Bebe walking down Bourbon Street singing “Lean on Me” while they were linked arm and arm. The drunk leading the more drunk back to the hotel.

She smiled, straightening her black business suit. She was about to pull her hair up into her signature bun but decided to let her tresses fall free instead.

As she was getting checked into the convention she slipped her ID badge and program of speakers, herself among the list.

She heard her laugh. Jili whipped her head around and saw Bebe at the back of the line with two others. Bebe was wearing a bright pink business suit, and her shoes and clutch had the print of medications on it.

“The legal drug dealers have arrived!!!! Big Pharma in da house!!!!!!”

Jili laughed, shaking her head.

“That’s how we met Liam.”

“We found out later we lived near each other, and made plans to meet up. Been friends ever since. That was like six years ago.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t ask us how we met.” Leo asked.

“I assume you are brothers…. You met… at birth?”

Bebe shook her head at Leo.

Everyone was calm after not to mention the alcohol free flowing. ��They headed to a lounge after dinner, called Blue Notes. The music there was full of soul and blues.

The drinks continued. The music there stirred the soul.

“May I have this dance?” Jili nodded, taking Liam’s hand. He held her close.

Leo eyed Bebe. “You know, I have always been one to have a huge case of FOMO. So you and me let’s hit the dance floor too.”

Bebe downed her drink in one swallow. “Why the hell not.”

They walked out to the dance floor. With Bebe’s high heels Leo was chest level to her. He pulled her close resting his head on her bosom.

“Um….so we’re doing this… okay…” Bebe looked surprised but she was smiling.

Liam laughed softly when he glanced in their direction.

“I don’t think that was meant to go there.”

“The height difference honestly never crossed my mind Jilian. Things seemed really awkward for them for a bit, for more so Bebe. Not so awkward now.”

Bebe and Leo were looking at each other laughing.

“You know this is never going to happen Leo Rys.”

“A man can dream. Well….It could happen for the night. I can tell you’re curious. Let me tickle your fancy tonight.”

Bebe laughed harder at him. “You don’t give up do you Leo?”

“Nope because I get what I want.”

“If nothing else Jilian, I think they will at least be friends from this, if nothing romantic happens.”

The next morning Liam was cooking breakfast when Bebe walked out of Leo’s room. Leo’s sweatpants looked like capris on Bebe.

“Good Morning Bebe. Would you like some breakfast?”

“Sure.”

Leo walked out of the room a few minutes later.

Liam smiled looking at the two of them.

“Breakfast Leo?”

“I already ate.” Leo winked at Bebe.

Bebe choked on her orange juice.

“Oh you were talking about bacon and eggs, sure.”

Nope not at all awkward at all. Liam thought as he fixed plates for himself Leo and Bebe.

Bebe was climbing in her ride share when her phone rang.

“Bebe… Liam just told me you had breakfast with him and Leo… at his apartment. You spent the night with Leo?”

“Leo was right, Jili. Not all of him is fun sized.”

Tags in the comments !!!!

#bebepac writes #the meet #before the greek meat #trr au #trr liam #trr jilian #trr bebe #trr leo #wacky drabbles #choices fic writers creations

68 notes · View notes

partnersatfazbear · 3 years ago

Text

Fazbear Frights: What We Found Analysis

Here’s my analysis for What We Found, the third story in Gumdrop Angel. I wrote this as I read so it may be a little different than my previous analysis where I read the story first and went back.

If you’re a Michael Afton fan I highly recommend this. Also, there’s possibly some insight into William Afton, Mrs. Afton, and Henry too, so it’s worth a skim.

Pg 144 '...a place thirty-some years forgotten' Just reconfirming FNAF 3 is 30 years past *one* of the FNAF closings, presumably FNAF 2 location.

Pg 145 "The whole building was giving him [Hudson] a headache." FIX THE VENTILATION BRUH

Pg 148 '...they were able to use salvaged derelict equiptment original to the old pizzerias.' Another confirmation of something we heard from Phone Guy.

Pg 147 "How old are you?" "Twenty-three, same as you." I think this gives us Michael's age during FNAF 3.

EDIT: This kept me awake last night. Obviously this is impossible because he has to be alive for at least 10 years before 1983, BUT maybe its just reconfirming FNAF 3′s year? 2023?

Pg 149 "Hudsan's dad died and his mom married Lewis, a ridiculous balding man who wore plaid vests and smoked a pipe" Did... Did this book just seriously imply Mrs. Afton left William for Henry? Really? (Yes, there's differences; the husband is dead and the man wears plaid 'vests' but it seems very odd to include that detail. This could just have been the writer's own imagination, though.) I have seen this as a fan theory and 100% explains the jealousy aspect of William, but I can't help but kinda hate it. I think this is very important, though, and probably Scott's intention. "This horrible little man [Lewis]... would make Hudson's next ten years a living Hell" This REALLY intrigues me given the context I just went over. The text implies Lewis was fairly neglectful to our main character / Michael stand-in Hudson. Maybe I'm wrong and for some reason Mrs. Emily left and went to William? XD Haha, I'm reading too much into this page. Maybe I'll come back to this later. I figure it's more of Scott possibly including double-details (contradicting stuff with the same character that really applies to two, which has been something I heavily pointed out in previous anaylsis on this blog) Having said that, I'm going w/the former because I can't imagine Henry being abusive (neglectful yes, abusive no) and he's never been portrayed that way in official works like William has in the novels.

Pg 150 "Hudson began to screw up in class...a product of spending the night in fear that his stepfather [Lewis]... [would] beat him just for the fun of it." Ooof. Big confirm on William actually being abusive. Unless we stick with the Henry theory for Lewis (combined with Midnight Motorist Henry theory / alcoholic). "...near-daily beatings..." "his mom started taking pills to get through the day..." So, whoever Mrs. Afton is, she was definetly not paying attention. But then, most people married to serial killers either don't notice because of denial (like this) or because the killer is so manipulative / careful they can't notice.

"Barry, who had red hair and freckles..." Yo?! Is that a description of Fritz?! These friends in the story could be the other kids Michael knew's stand-in's, aka the two gravestones with names he used (Fritz and Jeremy), as shown in the checks for the games and FNAF 6. I've long figured Michael was probably friends with the victims--it makes them easier, although riskier, targets [for William]. The two friends are male, too, like Fritz and Jeremy. If you're curious about Duane's description (our stand in for Jeremy), it's "tight black shirt... muscles... black hair long enough for a glossy ponytail..." I'm not sure if this matches anything found in the novels or contradicts them, though. (The novels = TSE trilogy)

"And so it went... until the night of the fire." For context, this is before FF burns down. We're learning of Hudson's life from his close friends in childhood, his father's death, his mother remarrying, to his abusive stepfather, to his grades slipping to this line. This would be a new fire not seen/mentioned in the games...

Pg 151 "...go to Charlie's for a sundae..." Really. Really Scott. Just gonna use this name again. OK. I'm not even gonna discuss this because it's probably irrelevant. *This is confirmed on pg 158 to be an ice cream shop. No lore relevance aside the annoying name coincidences Scott loves to troll with.

"This is not... an advance into enemy territory, a fight with demons, or a descent into Hell..." Uh, what? What is Hudson talking about? XD I'm only noting it because it seems so out of place. He's probably talking about video games or something.

Another note, although I don't have a specific reference since it is mentioned off-hand many times, is that Hudson keeps referring to his "history" which is implied to have kept him from getting a well-paying job and a girl he's crushing on doesn't know this "history" which is good for him. Seems good old "Michael Stand-In" has done some jail time or something. Edit: On pg 154/155 the girl asks Hudson, "Did you do it?" Seems he may have killed his stepfather or been involved with something else just as bad. Edit 2: No, I was thinking too deep into it. This probably refers to Evan's death at Fredbear's. DUH.

Pg 156 describes an actual "prize corner" in FF! What am I even reading? IIRC this is in FNAF 3, too. So they just hand out these scary gift boxes to people that complete the attraction? (Hudson says he *would* have fun handing out the scary toys to kids when this location opens--kind of a bully thing to do, eh?)

"[Hudson] avoid[ed] glancing in any of the mirrors..." I'm only pointing this out because it could be reference to one of two things. 1) We know because of one of UCN's music tracks, William has a fear of his reflection. Michael probably shares this trait, especially since 2) after Ennard and all... and later on pg 157 it also says, "he never wanted to face: himself" Sounds like guilt, my guy.

Pg 157 "blonde hair... blue eyes..." Hudson shares an eye color with Michael. It's possible Michael had blonde hair as a child and it changed to brown (it's common, something I personally went through being technically blonde/ blue eyed myself)

"He [Hudson] knew from personal experience that toys could turn from fun...to torture ina heart-beat" Fairly self explanatory. Either Hudson's worked at a creepy location before or he doesn't like remembering Fredbear's.

*checks how much is left.* There's still 35 pages (not counting back/front) left of this... This is gonna be a lot of notes.

Pg 158 Hudson doesn't have a car. Poor Mike, probably having to walk everywhere. Especially as a corpse.

Pg 160 This page describes many physical issues Hudson has that prevents him from entering the Navy, all from the abuse of Lewis. Obvious paralell to Michael becoming an undead [because his father sent him to CBPR indirectly causing his condition]

Pg 161 "How's your granny, Hud?... ...Is she still alive?" "I don't think she can die." Does anyone in the Afton family really 'die'? XD

Pg 162 These few pages discuss Hudson's grandmother. She's described as "a seer who claimed to know the future... ...wore big men's plaid flannel shirts with baggy jeans" Um, more plaid / flannel? AGH. STAHP. Lowkey, I would totally headcanon my Aunt Jen like this, though.

Pg 163 "Hudson's mom... the way she was before Hudson's dad had died... never... particularly warm and fuzzy... but... effiencient and responsible..." More about Mrs. Afton, so that's kinda neat.

"Hudson's dad was fun and attentive." There's a good Dad in this series?

"Unfortunetly, he also struggled with mental illness." "invisible low points" (Pg 164) Kinda reminds me of how Henry is described after Charlotte's death in the books.

Pg 164 "When Steven got himself into a bad deal that cost him his small business... he'd taken his life." Oh, it is Henry! SMH. Way to use confusing paralells. So, from our understanding thus far, Hudson's real father, Steven, is our Henry stand-in. His step-father despite being described similar to Henry, is actually our William stand-in. Fair game, Scott.

Pg 164 "...he [Hudson] was locked into a supply closet..." Oh shit, you guys. So, let me go on a tangent here, because this IS important! I just watched a retrospective on Sister Location and FNAF 6 earlier and one theory for Midnight Motorist was the person in the chair was the mother and the kid was Michael. I think this little line may confirm that. In fact, the story may be the key to figuring things out. Obviously, the line is a paralell to FNAF 4's scene in which Crying Child was locked in the supply closet of Fredbear's. I know some people, including Matpat, believe[d] CC was Michael, and in this book's context, it sort of works. This does contradict Step Closer and 1000 other things that make Michael the older brother, but maybe it's hinting at MM? Abusive stepdad (possibly Henry... maybe William is gone at this point), checked out Mom (hey, grey couch lady with Foxybro's font). IDK, but its definetly something to think about.

Pg 165 Lewis is mentioned as calling Hudson "nothing" and saying "you're nothing" on several occasions on this page. Just more abuse, for those accurate fanfic writers like me. Also I kinda wanna watch Morel Orel again. Yall know my fav character is Clay. Yall know.

"You're smoke." <-- Lewis / The text later reads, "...there was some irony, given what eventually happened." BRUH. Why did your stepdad die in a fire? :V TELL ME.

"When his family's house burned down at the end of his senior year..." Huh. Is there a fire we don't know about in the game-verse? Could this explain what happened to the FNAF 4 house before MM house?!

"...it purged Hudson of Lewis and his mother." MRS. AFTON BURNED ALIVE, TOO? Bruh. I can't with this story.

The text later describes the fire is concluded to be man-made and Hudson was blamed for it. Can't say if this ties to Michael, but it IS interesting... TBF, there is a small paralell to draw between Henry in FNAF 6 and his history of suicide in the books, too.

Pg 166 "...this place's [FF] busted thermostat.." I just find this line funny.

Pg 167 "...after three weeks of keeping an eye on the place" Some more timeline context for FNAF 3. We know that Michael worked there a little while before we start playing the game thanks to one of the phone calls, IIRC, so this makes sense. If Michael was accused of [something] and also wanting to hunt down his father, then it makes perfect sense why he's working a dead end job at Freddy's over and over and over. Fun fun fun.

Pg 169 "He hated to think about a functional character [Foxy]" This line is in regards to Hudson not liking the set up of Pirate's Cove and Foxy's hook to scare people. Sounds familiar, don't it? (For Michael anyway.)

Pg 173 "Some big find is arriving tomorrow." SPRINGY BOI! COME ON BOOK, get on with the show?

Pg 176 "Granny was wearing a red-and-green plaid shirt and her baggy jeans." Nothing special, but it was specifically brought up twice. I'm kind of racking my brain trying to understand what the point of this character is outside of "woooo everything is haunted don't you know that" kind of character.

Pg 180 "...dropped the crate on the linoleum with a resounding thud." HEY. Poor Springtrap, just gettin' tossed around like the trash he is.

Pg 186 "If you weren't so stupid, I'd tell you more about it." Springtrap bringing the burn. =:)

"A voice with a burr-like rasp...hint of a Southern accent" I'm going to assume this is because it's Lewis probably in the suit in this story and not our old British lad.

"It's was Mr. Atkin's voice." THE MATH TEACHER? *goes back to check* 'The algebra teacher'. Okay...

Pg 190 Okay, so Hudson hear's Lewis' voice this time. Okay, I get it now. Springtrap in this kind of imbodies all of Hudson's old bullies, including the teacher. He also has PTSD, just FYI. IDK if anyone finds that important, but it's fairly obvious by the line "He wasn't in his bedroom. Lewis didn't just slam his head into a desk; his head had been slammed into the [arcade] game."

"Why did he hallucinate a scene from his childhood?" Oh, it's not PTSD, then. It's just the VENTILATION ERROR. lol Okay.

Just a note, as I'm reading through the more action-based stuff, I kind of feel bad for Michael if he had flashbacks like this guy. They're intense.

So, Lewis' voice finally comes out of Springtrap on Pg 213. There's that.

Pg 220 "You can just stay there [in his room]" Kind of a paralell to Midnight Motorist. Lewis is saying it to Hudson. I really feel like the kid in the MM game is Michael because of this story...

Pg 223 "Heat purges. Fire heals." I'm sure that's Henry's life motto.

The ending was stupid, but most in these stories are. Hudson is hallucinating and is implied to have burned himself alive in FF's oven. Meh? The first half of this one is A TRIP and a little insight into what I 100% believe is Michael's childhood. I think the saddest part of it all is that we never got Springtrap speaking to Michael in FNAF 3--and if it's ever remade I hope we get more of them interacting.

#fazbear frights #fnaf spoilers #spoilers #what we found #michael afton #springtrap #fnaf theories #fnaf theory #fnaf 3 #midnight motorist #mrs. afton #henry emily

35 notes · View notes

sortasirius · 5 years ago

Text

“Last Call” and Canon Bi Dean

This is going to be very long, very rambly, and very emotional.

Really though, I had high expectations going into this, and quite honestly? Jeremy Adams blew me away.

This episode is about Dean’s growth, it’s about who he was to Lee, and who he is now, about overcoming his own desire to just stop caring and keep on fighting for the innocent. But most importantly to me? This episode canonized bi Dean.

So let’s just get right into it, we know from the beginning that we’re meeting Lee, Dean’s old friend that Sam doesn’t really know or isn’t really close with, but the way Dean leaves? He doesn’t want to bring down the mood of Sam and Eileen in his post breakup depression funk? Good grief.

The bar is cool and right up Dean’s alley, and right out of the gate we get the promo scene with the waitress that we were all wigging out about. And my hunch was right, Dean just kinda rolls right by, which man, Dean from season 1? Hell no. She’s just his type, clearly into him, and yet, Dean’s world literally falls away when he sees Lee Webb singing onstage.

You can’t really do justice to the way with words to the way that Dean looks when he sees Lee and realizes who he is, Jensen and Christian have so much NUANCE in their scenes together, and the history behind them is palpable, even though we don’t know the extent of it. And Lee is just the same way, looking Dean up and down and “Dean Winchester,” just to hammer home that something is going on here and we should not ignore it.

“You got time?” “Always.” Bruh. There are so many details that we can pick up on about them, their relationship, who they were to each other. Even Dean’s little “you sound good,” come on guys, what the fuck?

That’s another thing: why don’t we know the history? Why do they shy away from talking about why they split apart? Dean is clearly upset when Lee mentions Arizona, what happened? Why did John and Dean never mention Lee? And obviously Lee knows John, hell he seems more sorry than Dean does that John’s dead, but then again, the Dean that Lee remembers idolized John, so that’s definitely a big change for Lee, because Dean clearly doesn’t idolize John anymore.

I just want to hear about everything that’s mentioned in the episode in more detail: Lee and Dean went hunting together, presumably alone, since John caught them drunk on a hunt. What went on? I think we know. How often did they hunt together? How long had they known each other? D E T A I L S please Jeremy Adams!!!

“I don’t think I have seen you since Sammy was in college.”

“Right.”

“I mean, hell, I thought you were-”

“Dead?”

Also Lee does this little teasing laugh and everything about them is soft and my chest hurts.

“I mean, that’s usually how this ends, isn’t it?”

And what I want to talk about here is Lee’s reaction, because he doesn’t shrug and do the usual “so it goes” that so many hunters do, he looks at Dean, like really looks at him, he sighs and says a simple “yeah” with this look that’s so soft and so full of something and Dean looks away (doing his eye motion thing he does with Cas) and Lee breaks contact too and looks down and smiles and oh my god. I told yall this was going to be rambly but I didn’t draw breath while typing that lmao.

I wanna know about the Arizona thing, I want to know why it made Dean uncomfortable when Lee mentioned it, and I want to know why it’s glossed over. These two were like best friends, you can tell, and for them to just stop talking? Hm.

They swap tales, talking about the triplets that they “split em up fair and square” even though that’s not possible and they had an orgy obviously. Dean has this look with the waitress again and you can tell he appreciates it but like? That’s the end of it? In the next scene she’s gone and it’s just Lee and Dean talking, Dean making Lee laugh and enjoying it, it’s just so...romantic?

And even though, the second that Lee doesn’t recognize someone he should puts all of us, as the audience on alert, it doesn’t even cross Dean’s mind that Lee is doing something wrong, it’s not even on his radar.

“There’s nothing you can’t have, man.”

“Then who’s gonna kill the bad guys?”

“Somebody else.”

And Dean looks away, because it’s clear what Lee is asking. He’s asking for Dean to stay.

When Lee starts up the band, I was just struck by how much they look at each other, getting in each other’s space, Lee leaning forward, Dean watching him walk away. Guys. This happened in front of our faces on screen.

“Can’t sit around lip syncing ‘Eye of the Tiger’ when no one’s watching.”

This is a callback to the ghost sickness episode, but also an intimate moment that no one gets to see of Dean. Sam catches him in the act of it on that episode, so how does Lee know he does this?

And then, let’s get to the singing. Dean’s always postured to Sam that he can’t sing (which we all know Jensen has the voice of an angel) and the buildup to him actually singing was so beautiful, because Lee knows he can, he teases him with the “Eye of the Tiger” thing, winks at him, keeps trying to pull him onstage, stands there and bites his lip when Dean’s singing. I mean. I’m at a loss to what else you would think about them, it’s just plain as day: they were together.

The whole thing is just so playful, and we never see playful like this from Dean. It’s flirty and funny and sweet and just such a nice change of pace, so good for Dean to be with someone that clearly wants to be with him, who he has history with (amidst the divorce he’s currently in w Cas). Even when they sing together they can’t keep their eyes off of each other and the whole thing is honestly too much it’s so fanfic-y and I can’t handle it.

And then, the big thing, Lee slaps Dean’s ass in the middle of the song, and Dean doesn’t blush, he doesn’t stand up straighter like that’s weird or wrong, he grins this huge amazing beautiful grin and says “you son of a bitch.” What else are we looking for here? He’s bi. He’s bi. With the lighting behind him and the bar named Swayze’s and Lee staring holes through him, we finally saw onscreen, canonical proof that he’s bi. Sure, it’s been hella subtextual before, but this is text, and no one can ignore it.

At the end of the song, one of Lee’s hands is gripping Dean’s shoulder, and Dean’s arm is around Lee’s waist?????????? Help??????

They round it all out with kicking some gross guys out of Lee’s bar, and Lee stares at Dean and says “still got it.” I mean....I’m running out of ways to say the same thing over and over.

“Best friend’s don’t just leave without saying goodbye.”

“They do if they deserve it.”

Hmmmmmmmm, something to think about with these lines.

“Look, I don’t know what’s going on okay, but this is not you.”

Compare that with:

“Cas, this isn’t you, this isn’t you.”

Cool. Fine. I want to die.

Lee became the monster because he thought there was no point in being a good person anymore. You can’t stave them off so you might as well “have a little fun.” Which I think is interesting because of how apathetic and hopeless Dean’s been since Chuck, since Jack, since Mary, since Rowena, but when it comes down to it, he’s always going to care, which is why we love him.

But what I really want to talk about is the way Dean’s face twists when Lee touches him, he turns his head away, his face contorts, like he wanted Lee to touch him, but not like this. We’ve seen Dean’s heart break so much in this show, he’s lost so much and so many, but this is something so different. It’s not only betrayal, or a realization that he has to kill Lee, it’s the loss of what he had with Lee, what he felt for him. It hurts to watch as an audience member, and I can’t imagine how it is for Dean.

Dean’s voice also breaks when he tries to call Lee back, in case you still had any tears left to cry.

The gunfight is intense, but not nearly as intense as what’s coming.

“I don’t know you.”

“You don’t Dean? I am you. I’m just you that woke up and saw that the world was broken.”

“Then you fix it. You don’t walk away, you fight for it!”

No double meanings in this episode are there? Perhaps this is a little bit of what happened between them all those years ago bubbling to the surface?

And then we get one of the best fight scenes in the show, and you know when Dean gets that cue stick, that it’s game over for Lee, but what I wasn’t expecting is the sheer heartbreak on Dean’s face. They both look down at the wound, like they’re both surprised, and Lee holds Dean, he fucking holds him, and this fucking piano music plays when Lee says “okay” and drops to the floor, and Dean leans against the pool table because fuck, how much more can he lose?

And because not even THAT is enough, ten seconds of divorced Destiel distress? Where Dean clearly wants to talk to Cas but Cas is still giving him the cold shoulder and it breaks Dean’s heart but he doesn’t know how to fix it????

There’s just so much to unpack here, the show is teaching us new things about Sam and Dean and Cas all the time, and yet I feel like I really know Dean know, I;ve seen a little bit of him that I had never seen before, and I’m just grateful. I’m grateful for Dean, grateful for these writers, grateful for his growth. I’m grateful for the angst and the happiness he had with Lee, however fleeting, and I’m grateful that I get to leave this episode with the fact that Dean is oncreen bi. Sure, it can be up to interpretation, he didn’t come out and say it, but that’s because he didn’t have to. Lee knew, so we knew, and that was all that mattered.

This silly, weird show is important to me for so many reasons, (clearly, since I talk about it all the damn time), but Dean especially is so important to me, I see so much of myself in him, and him being allowed to be him, without some grand coming out scene is even better than I could have ever hoped for. So thank you, Jeremy Adams, for giving us bi Dean, and one of my absolute all time favorite episodes in the show.

#supernatural #dean winchester #bi dean #dean #supernatural meta #spoilers #spn 15x07 #this is SO LONG!!#lee webb #meta #my meta #writing #i cried writing this and i am unashamed

2K notes · View notes