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cryptidsurveys · 3 months ago

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Thursday, August 15th, 2024.

Do you like McDonald’s sprite? It's fine. I'm not a big soda drinker, though. I typically only have it when I go to the movies, and in that case it's a small diet Coke. I don't even finish it.

What age did you start becoming more independent? It's only been within the past year that I've really started to become more independent. I was in the waiting room for a therapy appointment a few weeks ago and one of the nurses was joking with me about how I was there without my dad. I was like, "You know, at first I felt all cool doing things on my own, but now it's like…oh, so this is adulthood. How boring." ;D

How do you like your oatmeal? I usually make it with fruit, peanut butter, and sugar-free chocolate syrup, but I like it all kinds of different ways.

Do you ever just dance around the house? Sometimes.

List 5 things you need to do soon. In order of urgency: litter boxes, switch my laundry to the dryer, go grocery shopping, clean my room, clean the upstairs bathroom.

What do you do when you start to feel sad? It depends. Sometimes I have to stuff it down for the time being; in that case, I try to distract myself until I can deal with it later. I also try to figure out what's making me sad (assuming it's not entirely obvious). Sometimes I'm just tired or running low on emotional/social reserves, which means all I really need is either some quiet time by myself to decompress or some positive interactions to bring everything back into balance. I also like to watch my favorite YouTubers, cuddle with my kitties, spend time at the Mountain Park, etc.

Have you ever been to a metal concert? No.

Do you like metal? Yeah.

What’s your favorite Christmas movie? I don't think I have a true favorite.

What about Halloween movie? Same. But in general, I like a mix of horror and nostalgic childhood movies.

Do you like the taste of cilantro? Yeah.

Have you ever busted a window accidentally? I have. When I was a kid, I was playing baseball with some friends in one of their yards. We used rocks for the bases, and afterward I was tossing them back where they belonged and accidentally hit a basement window.

Do you remember those Bratz dolls? What were your favorite dolls? I do remember them, but I think I was too old to be into them.

What was the last thing to bum you out? I thought that said BURN me out, lmao. :') But I guess it's more or less the same answer regardless. I'm feeling a bit of animal shelter burnout. I was called in today; I know I could have said no - I'm technically just a volunteer - but I went anyway. It's a mix of physical exhaustion lingering from the last few days and just…ugh. I feel like I've hit a wall when it comes to tolerating mean and petty people. I don't want to keep taking it, but I don't know how to push back in a way that's not inappropriately explosive. I'm just tired of being walked on, nitpicked, and disrespected…especially when I am just a volunteer. But then it's also like, well, it is my choice to be there and put up with it, and I do want to be there, so…I feel a bit stuck. I really need to learn how to politely push back against people who are heaping too much shit on me. I know it sounds ridiculous, but the idea of sticking up for myself is terrifying. I have this stupid belief that I'm only likeable if I'm people-pleasing. Ugh. I'll figure it out. Also, to be clear - MOST of the people at the shelter are great and have always been kind to me. This is really only about a select few, around whom I unfortunately have to spend the most time.

What is your summer anthem? I don't have one.

Do you enjoy apples? Yeah.

Have you ever made apple butter? Do you like it? I've never made it before, but I do like it.

Do you own any pocket knives? Somewhere. We have this Swiss Army knife with a bunch of different gadgets.

On a scale of 1-10…How happy are you and why? Maybe a five. I know it's a relatively temporary five, though. I'll probably bounce back over the course of today/tomorrow. It's that balance I was talking about above - I just need more uplifting experiences after a slew of dissatisfying ones. Plus some time to relax, spend time with my dad and my cats, make some art, catch up on housecleaning, etc. It's not the first time I've felt like this and it probably won't be the last, so I know that all I have to do is weather it and it'll pass.

Do you think diamonds are overrated? Yeah. I'd much rather have a ring made from a meteorite or something cool like that.

How many languages can you greet somebody in? English, German, Swedish, Spanish, and Japanese.

Do you have a favorite planet? I don't.

Do you know how to play the flute? No.

What do you enjoy putting in your smoothies? Milk or yogurt, bananas, strawberries, mangos, blueberries, chocolate syrup, peanut butter…not necessarily all at once, but in some combination.

What’s a medication that has really helped you? OTC migraine meds do a surprisingly decent job…but I probably need to explore further options. When it comes to psych meds, though, I don't feel like any have significantly helped me (and I've tried a whole bunch of them) which is why I'm not on them anymore and haven't been for a number of years now. I've found other ways to cope.

Do you forgive easily? Yes and no. Intellectually, I think I can forgive fairly easily/quickly. Emotionally, it takes a bit. I'm like, hey man…this is the part where you drop the grudge, okay lmao. DROP IT.

Have you ever broken up with somebody? Yeah.

What was the biggest phase you went through when you were younger? Some sort of goth/emo/anime thing.

Is there something you’ve been hiding from someone? No.

Do you believe in demons? Idk.

Have you ever seen a spider consume another spider? No.

What’s your favorite fruit? Probably mangos.

Do you ever go clubbing? No.

Have you ever been to a church camp? I went to this Bible camp thing as a kid. Not a sleep-away camp, but a day camp.

Have you ever accidentally swallowed something you shouldn’t have? Maybe…?

Last book you remember enjoying? The one I've failed to pick up for weeks now. :')

When was the last time you got scared? I'm not sure.

Have you ever seen a boy band live? No.

When was the last time you drank water? Just a few minutes ago.

Have you ever been dehydrated? Yeah.

Have you ever shot a gun? Yeah.

Do you use Facebook? No.

Would you say you’re well educated on religious topics? I wouldn't say I'm well educated, but I'm not entirely ignorant either. Even though I don't practice any particular religion, I still find them interesting.

What’s the longest you have walked at once? Like 13-14 miles.

Do you ever take those Buzzfeed quizzes? No.

How long was your last phone call? Just a minute or so. My mom called me while I was at the shelter earlier to ask how the little kitten was doing. He's an absolute sweetheart and an absolute terror.

#survey #surveys #personal survey #random survey #survey blog

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nctsjiho · 3 years ago

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Alternate Universe

warnings: mention of COVID. This is was meant to be pure fluff ngl, but you might’ve guessed it, that’s not how it turned out.

era: May 2021

❀ During a sleepover in JiHo’s new apartment, she and Renjun imagine how life would be if NCT never met each other

“Okay, but with space being infinitely big, who says there can’t be multiple universes. And maybe, one of those universes could be an alternate universe similar to ours.” JiHo hummed as she listened to Renjun’s rant - which had been going on for about 30 minutes at this point. She pulled her blanket up to her chin and closed her eyes. “Do you think we’d still have met in that universe? Do you think NCT exists there?”

JiHo let out a deep sigh, “Go to sleep Renjun, it’s already past 1.” She turned her head to look at Renjun who was slightly pouting and she let out a small chuckle. “I just wonder how things would’ve been if we hadn’t met each other.” Renjun then locked eyes with the girl. “Any of us.”

Sitting up straight against the arm rest of her new L-shaped couch, JiHo stretched her arms. Renjun mirrored her action on the other end of the couch, curious as to why JiHo did so, she had been nagging him to shut up and sleep earlier anyway.

“As for me...” She trailed off. Renjun took notice of how JiHo’s eyes had focused on nothing particular. Even in the dimly lit room he could see how her eyes looked so bright yet charming. He never told anyone, but JiHo’s greenish eyes were one of his favourite things to look at. They were so pretty and interesting. Not only was she the only member who didn’t have just brown eyes, but something about them had him get lost in her eyes whenever he got the chance to look at them closely.

JiHo coughed before continuing. “I’d be in France right now. Probably had a reckless childhood with my weird friends and helping out at my grandparents’ pension.” Even though Renjun felt sad that he wasn’t part of that alternate-universe-childhood, he couldn’t help but smile when JiHo did. Reminiscing the childhood she had and imagining how it would’ve continued if she’d never gone to Korea to become an idol made her feel nostalgic in a sense. She didn’t get to experience it, but she could imagine it as if it really happened.

“I’d probably have a dog and live a normal middle-class, country side, family and friends oriented life. Maybe continued on with rope skipping and actually go semi-professional.” She contently sighed. “What about you?” JiHo’s eyes fell on Renjun’s shadowy figure. The light coming from the window only hit the far side of his body, so JiHo couldn’t really make out much of his appearance.

“I don’t know. I actually don’t know.” JiHo laughed softly. “Oh, don’t tell me you theorised about aliens, alternate universes, ghost, any kind of supernatural, but you’ve never thought about life without NCT?” Her mocking, yet innocently playful tone elicited a chuckle from him. “I guess I would’ve went on with school and worked hard to get into a good university so I could get a good job.”

“And your art? You’re really talented, you could do something with that.” The unexpected compliment casted a pink tinge on Renjun’s cheeks and he was so happy JiHo couldn’t make it out in the darkness of the room. “Hm. Maybe.” He hummed bashfully.

The two sit in silence for a bit before Renjun speaks up again. “How is it living here?” The sudden break in silence makes JiHo jump the tinniest bit and her head quickly turns to face Renjun. He laughs. “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.”

His eyes scan the room, or at least what he can see of it. He already got used to the dark, so he could the silhouettes of all the furniture in the spacious apartment. The living room, kitchen and dining era was bigger than those in most of the NCT dorms, but this apartment only had 2 bedrooms, a bathroom, a toilet and a small dressing room - it might as well just be a closet. It looked way more trendy than his dorm. “Esteem must have some good money.” He thought.

“It looks nice.” He then looked at JiHo, awaiting her response. “It looks nice yeah.” Her voice sounded way less chipper than it did before. “Why? Do you not like it?” Once again, JiHo’s head snaps up. “No, I do like it. It’s pretty big, not too much furniture so it’s easy to clean. My bedroom is big enough for a queen size bed. It’s nice.” “You don’t seem too happy about it though.”

Jiho sighed and let her body fall back down in a lying position on the couch. “It’s lonely.” She stated simply. No other explanation, just those two words. “What about your manager?” Renjun asked, but then he remembered. He, and no one of the other members who have visited her over the past two weeks had really seen her manager. Maybe one or twice in passing, but the manager wasn’t in the apartment for more than an hour whenever they came over.

A groan escaped the sleepy girl’s lips as she stretched her arms out in front of her. “She’s still managing for another talent under Esteem. And that person has a lot of schedules currently, so my manager is just out working all the time.” “But we come by often, and you come over to the dorms as well.” JiHo nodded, not necessarily for Renjun to see, she didn’t think he would either way, but he did. “So?” “It’s only the second time someone stayed over here. Which I really enjoy by the way.” She quickly added as not to offend Renjun because of her rather gloomy tone.

“It’s just that whenever I come back home, whether it’s from the company or from your guys’ dorms, I just get hit by the fact that I’m alone in this apartment.” Renjun sympathised with the girl, understanding why it could make her feel lonely. “Not only that, it also makes me realise that NCT really is all I have. I don’t have many other friends, or at least not those who I hang out with. It’s only you guys.”

Not wanting to face Renjun, whether he was able to see the disheartened look on her face or not, JiHo pulled her blanket up to her chin again. “My family lives about 12 plus hours away by plane. I haven’t seen them in six years, and quite frankly, I’m not sure when I get to see them again.”

Renjun felt his stomach sink a little as JiHo slowly lost her ability to hide her real feelings. Each word sounded more and more painful to utter, sounded like it took more energy, it just felt so sad.

In an attempt to cheer JiHo up, Renjun spoke up. “Hey, once COVID is over, you should just get on a plane and visit them.” JiHo let out a bitter laugh and it makes Renjun’s heart clench. Did he say something wrong?

“You don’t think that in those six years I could’ve just gotten on a plane and visited them?” JiHo asked, her tone sounding just as, if not more bitter then her laugh just a second earlier. “Don’t you think that my family could’ve just jumped on a plane and visited me?” She scoffed. Of course it wasn’t directed to Renjun, rather the situation itself, but the boy couldn’t help but feel a bit targeted. He didn’t blame her though, it must of been so frustrating for her.

“Do you mind me asking why it didn’t happen then?” JiHo looked at Renjun, who had pushed himself up further on the couch, his legs now crossed in front of him. “There’s literally no reason it didn’t happen before. It doesn’t make sense that I never went back or that my family never came here. It’s just like this.” “But- How?” Renjun felt so confused, it really didn’t make sense.

JiHo sat up as well and stared out in front of her at the window. “Whenever I wanted to go SM or the managers always made up some excuse. It was either schedule conflict, or I had problems with my visa in my trainee days, or I had a last minute meeting. SM never let me buy my family plane tickets and whenever they would tell me they’d come visit, they would always cancel last minute for something that happened. After a while I just stopped asking.” Renjun carefully stood up after JiHo’s confession. “And after a while, my family stopped planning to come.”

It went unnoticed by JiHo that Renjun had moved over towards her. She looked to the side to see her friend already sit next to her on the couch. “I didn’t know. I’m so so sorry.” JiHo shook her head. “It’s not your fault.” She responded, a silence fell over them once again.

Renjun watched as the gears inside of Jiho’s head kept turning. He felt so bad for everything she had to go through is silence. Everything she hid from everyone. All of it was just extra weight in her backpack full of worries and burdens.

He grabbed her hand which had fallen limply next to her lap. The touch making her snap out of her thoughts. “It just doesn’t make any sense.” She kept shaking her head. “Someone inside of SM must have been talking to my family, or maybe they felt betrayed when I left to Korea-” “Never.” Renjun interrupted, not wanting JiHo to even entertain that thought. “Maybe they got mad that I kept cancelling my visits.” Her head still continued shaking from left to right as if she was in denial, and to be honest she was. “Make it make sense Renjun.” Her voice cracked as her eyes locked with Renjun’s.

The same eyes that seemed to light up the dark room earlier felt devoid from all it’s usual brightness and youthfulness. On most days the green in her eyes reminded Renjun of jade, cool and charming, on other days it reminded him of nature, energetic and playful, but right now the green was so dull and was barely visible between the brown colour of the rest of her irises.

Renjun squeezed JiHo’s hand lightly. “I’m so sorry JiHo, I don’t know.” This causes JiHo to nod and let her eyes wander back to the window. “If I could I’d move back in with Haechan and the boys.” Renjun’s eyes stayed focussed on JiHo’s hand. It made him happy that her dainty fingers fit perfectly interlaced with his. The boy was used to holding for example Jisung’s hand, which was way bigger than his own and even though they fit into his as well, it was a different kind of fit. With JiHo’s hand he felt a sense of protectiveness and responsibility, like he had to be the one to make sure JiHo wouldn’t get hurt.

“Chenle doesn’t live with you guys, but at least when he goes home he has his family. Whether it’s his parents or his aunt, he has family with him all the time. As for me...” She trailed off. “This place doesn’t feel like a home at all. I was perfectly happy living with the boys. You guys are all the family I have here.” JiHo released a big breath as if she had just done a physical exercise that required a lot of energy.

Her eyes then fell onto Renjun and her intertwined hands, smiling at the way Renjun absentmindedly drew hearts on the back of her hand. “I love my parents and grandparents. I really do.” Renjun got startled by JiHo’s desperate tone, as if she was trying to prove him of her love for her family. “I know-” “I would like to believe I’d do anything to see them.” “And you would.” Renjun smiled assuring, even if his smile showed sadness. “I don’t think that’s true Renjun.”

JiHo’s breath hitched for a second before she made eye contact with her worried friend. “I could’ve just went. I could’ve not listened to SM and went. If I truly loved my family as much-” “Don’t say that JiHo.” Renjun scolded carefully, but JiHo just shook her head. “If I loved them so much, wouldn’t I have done it? I got on a plane to China for Xiaojun behind our managers back once for God’s sake.” She took a few seconds to calm her breathing. “Why haven’t I gone and visited my family?”

“You’re scared.” JiHo’s eyes widened in confusion. “What?” “You’re scared aren’t you? That going back might not be what you imagined it to be. But why does that matter? It’s your family, they love you and miss you just as much as you love and miss them.”

A wave of realisation hit JiHo and she felt tears well up in her eyes. Throwing her head back she tried her best to stop them from flowing and from more forming in her eyes.

Once the tears subsided she looked at Renjun who had a soft smile on his lips. “I’m scared that if I go back, that I’ll realise how much I actually missed my family.” Renjun laughed slightly amused. “What’s wrong with that?” “If I go...” She started and Renjun nodded along with her words, yet his smile faded as soon as JiHo uttered her next words.

“I might realise I don’t want to come back here again.”

---

Side Note: I wanted to write for Renjun for soooo long! This was based on a cute/funny prompt I found on Tumblr, but literally a few paragraphs in and my mind went “let’s make it a bit angsty”. This might be one, if not my favourite writing I’ve done so far <3 I hope you all liked it as well.

I know my content hasn’t been as good lately so I hope this writing will get me back on track a bit. I definitely have to do something about my inability to think of good titles tho O.O

I hope you have a nice day/evening/night <3

#jiho.writings #nct 24th member #nct addition #nct dream imagines #nct imagines #nct female member #nct extra member #nct additional member #kpop!addition #kpop!oc

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superworldunkown · 4 years ago

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You’re My All Might

An: Daddy Bakugou x Kiara is back! I needed it after looking at that potential manga cover, ooof!!

Summary: Kiara is sick and Bakugou ain’t having it, someone get me All Might!!

Kiara was home sick. Her normally glowing brown skin that matched the beauty of her mothers was a greenish hue, and just like her father when he was under the weather, Kiara wasn’t happy about any of it.

“I wanna go to pweschool mommy.”

“You can’t baby,” You hushed while taking a tissue to your daughters dripping nose, “You don’t want to get all your friends sick do you? Besides, you get to spend the day with Daddy, how fun!”

“Daddy’s cranky!”

“Hah? And what are you! Damn brat.”

“Katsuki!”

“What!” He huffed while stuffing a piece of pancake into his mouth, “My only damn day off in weeks and you gotta go to work and Kiara’s sick as shit...” He grumbled something neither you or your daughter could understand while shoving more food in to his mouth.

You creeped up to your husband, placing gentle kisses on his cheek, “Please be good with her today. Maybe when I get home I’ll,” You whispered the rest into his ear, still delighted that after all the years you two were together you could still make your hotheaded husband blush like he did back when you were teenagers.

“Fine.” He grumbled while placing a peck onto your lips, “I get to pick the outfit though.”

“Deal.” You smile sweetly before walking over to your daughter and kissing her on the head. “Be good, Kiara. Don’t put Daddy through too much trouble today.”

You gave both of them one final rundown of Kiara’s medicine schedule, the dos and don’ts of the day, and a small chore list (much to Bakugou’s disliking) before you were out the door and off to work. Bakugou let out an annoyed sigh, staring at his daughter who was currently glaring daggers' in his direction. What happened to his sweet little three year old that was obssessed with him? Who the hell was this sick little monster in front of him?

Trying to appease his daughter he said, “Let’s eat breakfast in front of the TV.”

Kiara let out a growl of approval.

Setting his daughter down in the living room he brought her her breakfast and rested on the couch while she ate against the coffee table.

“Not hungry.” She groaned while pushing her plate across the wooden table and dramatically throwing her head back to stare at her father.

Bakugou let out an equally irritated groan while flipping through the channels, “You need to eat Kiara. You aren’t going to get better if you don’t eat your breakfast.” Was that true? He didn’t care. Maybe if she ate something she would be less of a pain. He loved his daughter, there as no question to that. But damn, she was really started to pick up on the bratty attitude he had as a kid. Maybe he should write an apology letter to his parents in hope to reset his karma before his daughter became a teenager.

Teenager?! He shuttered at the thought.

“I want Ice Cream Daddy.”

“Tch, thought you weren’t hungry.”

“Pleaseeee. I’m sicky.”

Bakugou smirked, “That shit may work with your mother but not with you, kid.”

Kiara let out another whine of disapproval. This one with the caliber to really do a number on Bakugou’s ear drums. Before he could respond his eyes snapped to the attention of the television. A familiar, jovial theme song of a former hero coming from the speaker.

“Don’t forget, this weekend is the All Night All Might Movie marathon, where we will be celebrating the former symbol of peace on the tenth anniversary of his retirement! Tune in at 8:00pm with all the details....”

“Daddy, whose-whose...All Might?”

Whose All Might?

Whose All Might?!

What the hell...

Bakugou turned to look at his daughter who seemed absolutely capivated with the former hero on the TV screen. Her face, despite the sickness coming from puffy cheeks and nose was glowing in awe as the highlight real of the hero’s glory days played on the screen. It was almost nostalgic; a mirror image of himself as a kid taking in the greatness that was his favorite (and still favorite) hero.

Her face dropped when the segment switched back to the regurly schedled boring programing.

“You wanna know who All Might is?” He asked. His daughter turned to him with a smile and a ferocious nod of her head.

Sitting upright from the couch he eyed his daughter, “Finish your breakfast. I’ll be back.”

He returned a few moments later with a box labeled, ‘Katsuki, keep the hell out!’ in bold marker. Kiara scooched over towards her father as he opened the box and pulled out a variety of All Might merchandise from his childhood. A blanket, a few action figures, and most importantly, DVDs. Taking one of silver disks he placed it in the device next to the television before settling back down on the couch. Kiara let out a high pitched squeal of delight as the all mighty All Might appeared on screen, flashing is smile and laugh as if he was speaking directly to her.

Kiara clutched the All Might action figured she now claimed as her own as she and her father watched the footage of All Mights most heroic rescues.

“Did you see that Daddy! He saved them!” Kiara pointed to the screen of a daring rescue while looking at her father.

“Mhmm, I see it.” He mused, trying to play down the stirring emotions of how absoltely thrilled his daughter was watching his idol while clutching the same action figure he held so closely as a child.

As the video ended Kiara looked back at her father, “Is there more Daddy?”

“Tch, is there more? He was the Symbol of peace for decades.” Noticing the confused face of his daughter he simply answered, “Yeah, Kid. There’s a lot more.”

Switching out the DVDs he scooped up his daughter and placed her on his lap while the two of them spent the morning watching the old videos. Kiara was enamored to say the least.

Bakugou decided to hold back on sharing that he knew All Might personally and was a mentor of his during his U.A years. He feared the small child would implode at the news her new favorite (second to him, of course) hero was her fathers mentor.

It was a fun time reliving his favorite memories with his daughter. However, when the video switched to All Mights final battle as a hero, the battle in Kamino, his body began to sink further in the couch.

“Daddy! Daddy! That looks like you!”

Bakugou didn’t even notice he was on the screen. He only appeared for a brief moment, blasting The League of Villains before the camera switched to All Might’s arrival.

The memories flooded back with a heaviness Bakugou was not prepared to wade through on his day off of all days. His breath hitched slightly, as he watched the flame of One For All slowly diminish in his mentor’s body with each passing hit and blow to that damn Boss Villain All For One.

“Daddy?” Kiara’s voice was soft, but strong enough to shake Bakugou out of the darkness of his mind, “Why are you sad?”

He hadn’t realized he was on the verge of tears until his daughter pointed it out. Making a stern face he reassured her, “I’m fine, kid. I’m just,” He didn’t know how to formulate it, nor did he know why he was telling his three year old daughter who was entirely too young to understand feelings like shame, guilt, and mourning, “He was a damn good hero, Kiara...He always won, he always saved everyone. I’m just...sad he’s not here anymore.”

Kiara looked deeply into her father’s sad eyes. Her own young mind attempting to put the pieces together in a way that she could articulate and understand, “But, you save Daddy. You win too.”

He looked up at her, tears still welling at the corner of his eyes as she continued. His little girl gave an enormously big smile, the smile she got from her damn mother. The one that swelled his heart so big he felt it was going to rip out of his chest in the most amazing of ways, “Daddy, you’re just like All Might,

You’re my All Might.”

Fuck.

His tears now fell freely from his red eyes. And he was positive his heart had moved up to the top of his throat. Pressing his daughter into a tight hug he rested his head on the top of her curly blonde hair.

“Fuck.” He breathed, still choking slightly on his words, “How the fuck did I get such a kind, kick ass kid like you baby?”

“Because Mommy.” Kiara answered simply, causing Bakugou to let out a small laugh.

“Yeah, I guess that’s right.”

He held his daughter for some time, not bothering to change the video as the credits rolled. Eventually he let his daughter loose enough to allow her to poke her head up from his chest.

“Still want that ice cream?” He asked while tenderly poking at her dribbling nose.

Her red eyes lit up again. Deciding to press her luck she asked, “Can I get two scoops?”

He smirked, “Sure kid. Whatever you want.”

“And, and...can I get the Deku Mint chocolate chip-”

“Don’t push it.”

#bakugou katsuki #bnha #bakugo #Kiara bakugou #domestic bakugou #bakudad #my hero academia #bakugou poc

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lightwithinthedarknessu · 3 years ago

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A Crown to Adorn

Starting off #sokaiweek2021 with a fluffy one-shot!

Wrote a little fluffy one-shot for Day 1 of @sokaiweek Prompt: King and Queen. Childhood memories for #sokai and a cute flower date! A time of healing and reminiscence, adorned with flowers fit for a King and Queen.

A03: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32511775

Fanfiction. net: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13918369/1/A-Crown-to-Adorn

A Crown to Adorn

*.*.*.*

“Wear a crown of flowers on your head, let its roots reach your heart.” – Kabir

*.*.*.*

The smell of the grass, the warmth of the sun on their faces, and the slight scent of honeysuckle wafting through the canopy above was the perfect complement to an otherwise ordinary day. Ordinary, that word seemed to slip into her mind with a lithe bump, nestling into her heart but leaving behind a tinge of anxiety. Was it good to cherish something even if you knew it wouldn’t last? Those words danced within her mind as warm rays of light kissed her cheeks.

Living in the moment. Cherishing those small moments of reprieve-sometimes Kairi had to keep reminding herself to do that. Whether it be taking in deep breaths of the salty air or cherishing the soft sensation of sand squished between her toes- those small insignificant moments she needed to hold close. The way the wind hit her face as Sora and Riku rushed past her in one of their many races or the sensation of cold droplets hitting her face during one of their many water fights. Those moments, they would rush back at her all at once during those times she was alone, listless, and longing for their company.

Somehow, Kairi knew that today would be one of those many moments she held close to her heart. She took in a deep breath, savoring the crisp air hitting her lungs.

The Kingdom of Corona was as beautiful as Sora had claimed it would be. Filled with flora and fauna, clean air, and warm bathes in sunshine. Even the few heartless around were, she had to admit, cute in their own way. Made her almost sad to pummel them, but once she found herself attacking in unison alongside Sora- every thought she had just melted away. He always seemed to do that, make her feel as if she could do anything, be anything. It sounded silly but- his light made hers stronger somehow. It radiated within her a warmth that felt so comforting she never wanted it to leave.

After clearing the area, they had decided to take a quick swim in the spring nearby and were now sunning themselves like a couple of lizards on the forest floor. They had taken off their shoes and fully let themselves relax for what felt like an eternity. Peaceful, it was so peaceful that Kairi felt she could fall into a sleep here without a care in the world.

“I’m glad you brought me here. It’s so pretty.” Kairi turned to Sora, her eyes welling with shimmering light. After hours of training, Sora had dropped by unannounced, unattended by the other two little half-pints, to whisk her away for a “well-deserved break” as he put it. At the time he had a shy grin on his face, letting her know that really, he had just wanted to see her. Not that she minded. She wanted to see him too.

“I had to! I mean you love flowers and well the beach back home isn’t as green as this. Heck, I hadn’t even seen some of the plants here before. It’s really something- all those worlds we wanted to see- just there’s always something new.” Sora blurted out, his excitement burgeoning behind an uncontrollable grin. He rubbed the back of his neck and leaned forward. “Sorry, I’m getting a bit too excited. I’ve been wanting to show you all these new things for so long. Every time I see something I think, “Kairi and Riku need to see this!”

Kairi giggled. Sora did seem to be holding in boundless energy every time she saw him. “I want to see it all with you. I mean, we always wanted to travel and learn everything we could. Even just seeing this world makes me want to go to all kinds of places with you- and Riku too…” Kairi tucked a stray piece of hair from her face. She felt almost embarrassed to say anything more- to tell him that really, she wanted to just run away with him right now. Leave it all behind. But that would be selfish, wouldn’t it? They had to face Xehanort. Even if that meant risking their lives. Still, that incredible wanderlust creaked within her bones. Even now her heart began to beat faster at the thought of Sora whisking her away to world after world. She could just picture it-brisk walks on stardust touched beaches, huddling close in frigid snow-kissed air, or dancing on the tips of their toes across warm cobblestones-

Everything. Just experience it all-together- hand in hand in a world all their own.

Kairi felt something lightly fall on her head. A light gasp escaped her lips at the sensation. It tickled her eyelashes as she looked up to greet Sora’s impish grin. Her hand reached up to touch the delicate petals of a ring of flowers he had placed on her head. Her eyes widened. “When did you…”

“Oh just while you were humming to yourself earlier. Did I do a good job? I mean I’m not as good at connecting them together as you…but I did have a good teacher.” Sora winked.

Tears pricked the edges of her eyes. When they were children, Kairi often spent her time near the shore picking small wildflowers and clover. One of the few things she remembered about her grandmother was her love of flowers and the way she used to weave together flower crowns. It used to make her feel like she was almost home again, weaving the flowers together, creating something from nothing. It was cathartic. For hours she would lose herself in the action- maybe that was why piecing shells together also soon became second nature. Once, Sora sat down next to her, and watched intently as she connected each stem of clover flower without asking any questions. When she was done, he told her how pretty it was and how “he wanted one too.”

For a few days after school, they would go down to the shore, make flower crowns, and pretend they were a King and Queen of the flower people. Well, the last part was entirely Sora’s idea. When she thought back on it- Kairi wondered if Sora did that to help her feel better about being homesick. She had missed her grandmother so badly back then. Every day she felt so alone. But then…Sora was there. And Riku…and the three of them found new things to do together.

Back then, Kairi hadn’t paid a second thought to the idea that most boys wouldn’t find what she was doing that interesting. Thinking about it now, Sora probably only said he wanted one too so she wouldn’t feel lonely- after all…she wasn’t the fastest runner or could hold her own at the time in a mock sword fight. What she was good at was making things, connecting flowers, shells, and bits of shattered sea glass into stars shapes or crowns. Her room back home was filled with makeshift stars, unfinished and marred imitations of the charm Sora now held close as an oath to her. Her childish fantasies of an unbreakable connection, made real and whole through a brush of their fingers as she passed the charm to him. Her fingertips warmed as she recalled his touch.

Now, with the newly coronated flower crown atop her reddened locks-Kairi felt that same bubbling joy well up inside her.

Kairi couldn’t believe Sora had still remembered that time or well had even retained his “flower-tying skills” as he used to call it. Sora had remembered a time that even she had pushed back deep into the depths of her heart. “I think that you retained some skill.” Kairi puffed out her chest. “But I think I’m still the master. So, I’m going to work my magic! It’s only fair that you have one to match.”

Sora chuckled and placed both hands behind his head. “Well, I guess we’re off flower picking then huh?” His hips swayed from side to side, his legs acting listless as if they hadn’t moved in hours.

Kairi bounced up on her heels, feeling a renewed vigor in her veins. “Yep! Lead the way, King!”

“King?” Sora’s jaw slacked. “Gosh, when you say it like that it only reminds me of “the King.”

Kairi lightly patted Sora on the shoulder. “Now, now.” Kairi chided. “There can be more than one King and Kings of different things. He may be “the King” but you- you’re my Flower King right?” An impish grin filled her cheeks. Sora blinked a few times before averting his eyes. She could swear a tinge of red was on the tips of his ears.

“Geez flower King? Don’t tell Riku, or Donald or Goofy- I’ll never live that down.”

“But I’m the flower Queen- we have to match!” Kairi pointed an accusatory finger at him. Sora jumped back a beat, his deep blue eyes tinged with uncertainty. Soon, his eyes swirled with glimmering sunshine, his smile so subtle she found herself itching to gently brush her fingers across his lips. Her cheeks heated at the thought.

“Okay, I mean if you are I have to be then.” Sora put a hand over his mouth to muffle a laugh. Though clearly uncomfortable, there was a hint of joy in those words. Poking fun at him like this was almost too nostalgic. With ease, she slid her hand into his and gave it a tight squeeze. He recoiled slightly before sheepishly squeezing her hand back. His eyes wouldn’t meet hers, but she knew- he was just a tad shy still.

Hand in hand they traversed the woods searching for violet, azure, and fuchsia hues. Their still bare feet brushing against rough patches of dirt and slick grass, staining their toes a light green as they went. The morning dew, still kissing the tips of their hair, kept them cool against the ever-rising sun. Every flower they came across seemed more beautiful than the rest- they gathered until they were spilling out onto the ground beneath them. Sora sneezed a few times, sending them flying much more than he would have liked. The air filled with laughter as they collected them all again, each time regretting having over-prepared their bounty.

They returned to the clearing in no time at all-and she set about her work. Connecting the flowers together wasn’t hard- but choosing which flowers suited Sora best- well that took some thinking. Baby’s breath, delicate and kind, hydrangeas as blue and calming as the sea, red carnations brandishing the passionate courage in his heart, and yellow calla lilies to represent his happy disposition. When she was done- it was a crown only befitting him. When she held it up against the light, the shadows cast across her face danced- truly she could think of it as her best work yet. Smirking and a bit too proud, Kairi stood up and delicately laid the crown atop her “King’s” head.

“I, Flower Queen Kairi dub thee- Sora- Flower King.” In a grand bow, Kairi placed a hand over her heart, glancing up at him with mischief and mirth.

Sora’s wide toothy grin greeted her. “It’s an honor!” He paused, searching his mind before snapping his fingers in the realization of something important. “Does it look Kingly?”

“I think it suits you, just as mine suits me.” Kairi spun on her heels, dancing as she delicately brushed the petals she adorned. She gave Sora a taunting wink as she thrust out her hand. “I’d say a dance is in order, sire.”

A deep laugh escaped his chest as Sora jumped up to grab her hand and pull her close. Their eyes connected as if a thread between them became taught, sure, and certain that the entire world around them could just melt away into nothing, and it would all be alright. One step, then two, a sway and a swish, he even threw in a twirl or two as they danced to the bubbling brook and twilling birds. The melody in their hearts flowed and swirled at a tempo that pulled her into a sense of weightlessness. The countless times she dreamed of the two of them, blissfully dancing, suddenly made it real.

It was real, him, her, this moment. It was a sensation, a scent, a feeling she wanted to bottle up and keep close- like an herbarium filled with preserved flowers. Bright, opulent, and ever so warm. As their dance slowed, and her heart settled, Kairi leaned her head on Sora’s shoulder, letting herself melt into his rising chest. It was then Kairi knew that home wasn’t ever far anymore. That homesickness had long flitted away like petals in the wind once she let Sora into her heart. Now, every time she thought of their memories, these moments, the rise and fall of his chest, his heartbeat…Kairi knew somehow she was always closer to home.

Years Before

*.*.*.*

The bluff at the edge of town was filled with clover flowers. Though she had been warned with a stern shake of the mayor’s finger, and a disapproving huff or two from the town elders, Kairi always found herself foraging for flowers here. The wind blowing through her hair, and the misty salt air gently caressing her chubby cheeks made her feel more at home here than anywhere else on the island. In the afternoon quiet, only the rumbling low roar of the waves had been keeping her company. Lightly and carefully, she hummed a melody as she worked, losing herself in knot after knot.

*.*.*.*

“What do you think she’s doing?” Sora muttered in a hushed tone, trying to keep his usually loud voice as quiet as possible. He was huddled on his haunches behind a large hedge, practically wiggling to keep himself from falling over. He and Riku had followed Kairi from a distance like two ducks up the winding hillside. When they had seen her leaving the Mayor’s house she had been stomping and letting out a long-winded sigh or two. Riku had said that she was “probably angry” and that it mostly had to do with her going off alone. Sora, being extremely curious about Kairi ever since she had arrived on the beach, had never not kept watch over her. So, Riku being Riku had suggested they follow her, knowing well that Sora would have found himself trailing after her absentmindedly.

Riku let out a sigh and shook his head. “She’s going to make something again. The last time she came back down from here she had a crown of flowers in her hands. That’s probably what she plans on doing.”

“Hmm, that seems more lonely than fun. She’s all by herself.” Sora pursed his lips, his nose scrunching up. He crossed his arms and readjusted his drooping bum with a light hop. “Seems like it’d be better to do with more people.”

Riku raised a brow, then smirked as he realized something important. “You know, if you want to join her nothing’s stopping you. We can go back to the play island any old time.”

“But it feels like if I go over now, I’d be like- I don’t know- I’d um make her mad…”

“Mad?”

“You always say I talk too much. Kairi seems a bit scared when I do that.” Sora looked down at his fidgeting toes. “Still, I think she’s lonely.”

“She just doesn’t know much about us yet. And well you do talk a lot. My dad says sometimes though that just being near someone without saying anything is enough.” Riku crossed his arms, and nodded, certain his father’s words were true.

“Really Riku?”

“Yeah, Really.” Riku put a hand on Sora’s head and gave his hair a quick ruffle. “Now, no more waiting!” Riku placed both hands on Sora’s back and pushed him forward- not even worried if he would fall over on his face. Usually, he did, and Sora had to brace himself for a fall that didn’t come. Instead, he found himself balancing on one foot and staring into the wide cerulean eyes of a frightened girl.

*.*.*.*

When a rustling bounded behind her Kairi gasped and found herself on her feet, her hands clutched close to her chest. A familiar head of spikes was what first caught her eyes, then the twigs and leaves sticking out every-which-way, followed by the shy grin of a boy caught doing something he shouldn’t.

“Geez, Sora! You scared me!” Kairi tucked her hair behind her ear as if she were suddenly aware of her own messy mop.

“Sorry, Kairi! Me and Riku were just…” Sora paused to look behind him. Not a soul was in sight. “Aw man, where’d he go? We were just talking about…ugh never mind.” Sora stood up straight and puffed out his chest as he shook the stray twigs and leaves from his head. Once he was done, he placed both hands behind his head. “So…what-cha doing?”

“Making flower crowns…” Kairi mumbled under her breath, feeling herself carefully enunciate each word. Sora was nice, after all, he was the one who found her on the beach that day. But a part of her felt scared, nervous, and a bit rumbly in her tummy when she talked to him. He was always so bright, and his grin was wider than his face. Kairi didn’t know how to be around him. Kairi turned her back to him and smoothed the ends of her dress.

“Okay.” Sora uttered. He continued to stare at her, unmoved until she decided to sit back down among her work. As she picked more flowers, she began to take more glances over at Sora. He watched her intently, swaying from side to side on the edges of his sandals. He stayed that way for a beat then promptly plopped down next to her. Kairi’s breath hitched in her throat at the sudden invasion in her little bubble. But Sora didn’t say anything, although his face was twisted into an unnatural frown, alerting her he really did want to say something.

Kairi tried her best to get back to her crown, but she fumbled with shaky fingers as she tied the tiny stems together. Her lips moved into a fine line, her teeth biting down into the corners of her cheeks. Again, soon she became lost in the motions, not even noticing Sora get up and go look around. Moments later he dropped back down next to her, this time, with a handful of clovers.

“It’s really pretty.” Sora blurted out. His eyes were wide, expectant.

A shivering jolt went through her back, and Kairi shyly looked back down at her completed crown. He said it was pretty, what she made. A slight hint of pride wafted through her chest. “Thanks…”

“I-I want one too!” Sora’s voice was louder than he intended, for Kairi almost fell back at the sudden noise. She made sure to quickly put on a smile for the boy looked almost as if he would cry if he knew she was scared.

“Okay, I’ll teach you.” Kairi found a new strength in her voice. She was more confident now. A voice inside her heart, but from where she didn’t know, whispered caressing words.

Whenever you feel lonely, look to the flowers. Surround yourself with them, let them take root in your heart. Every moment may seem small, but you can make them bigger and more beautiful. For those moments when you’re alone, the flowers will remind you of me and of those who love you. That light in your heart will continue to bloom and grow, as long as you let it. Adorn your head with a crown of flowers, my dear. Adorn the head of the one you love. Find that light, never lose sight of it.

Notes:

Thank you for reading! This fic was inspired by the prompt King and Queen for SoKai Week 2021. Visiting Sora and Kairi's childhood and what they meant to each other during that time was pure joy. I hope that this little bundle of fluff reminds you of the wonder of picking flowers as a child, and how even the smallest acts of kindness can mean the world to someone else. I tried to add in some of Sora's flowers from his herbarium by super groupies as well as flowers that spoke to his personality. Fun fact: Clover flowers were something that I would gather when I was a child, and luckily they do grow at least in Hawaii at high elevations, so it's possible they could be on the mainland in Destiny Islands!

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#sokaiweek2021 #sokaiweek #kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts fanfiction #sokai #sora and kairi #kairi #sora #kingdomheartsfanfiction #KH #kingdomhearts

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prioritysope · 4 years ago

Text

Letters

Reader: Female

Character: Bokuto Koutaro

Rating: Angst

Chapter: 13/13

read chapter one first!

The whole place was surprisingly busy. The entire Bokuto family was there, along with your family and close friends. The atmosphere was tense and nostalgic. Every face was full of sadness and others were trying to hide the pain.

They were at the activity they did for the second anniversary of your death, but something worse had happened. Bokuto committed suicide the same day that was the second anniversary of your passing. December 25th. Both families decided to do the activity together, in order to say goodbye properly.

The news of Bokuto's suicide was surprising, nobody expected that. Everyone thought that after the first try and the therapies, he would be fine. He seemed fine, but it turns out he was a good actor. Every person in the place wonders: What was he thinking at that moment?

For many the decision that Bokuto made was that of a total coward and that he did not know how to face everything. However, someone should never be called a coward for making such a decision. The simple act of making such a decision was because he accumulated too much courage, because that is not something so lightly.

At the back of the funeral home were Akaashi, Kuroo, Konoha, Hinata, and the rest of the teams. Some friends close to (Y/N). Everyone still did not believe it at all, they were in complete shock. How was it possible that their so cheerful friend was no longer with them?

"It all feels so unreal." Kuroo whispered, he felt a lump in his throat, but he didn't want anyone to see him cry. He preferred to cry all day in his room.

Out of all of them the only one who was crying shamelessly was Hinata and Akaashi. Even Keiji blamed himself a bit.

"I should have been more for him, this is my fault." He mumbled through tears as (Y/N)'s younger sister comforted him on the floor.

"Akaashi-san, this is not your fault. To all of us he seemed to be happy and we fell for that, and we didn't see that he was really suffering. He was even able to silently ask for help and we didn't realize it." Now Tsukishima spoke, who was leaning against the wall.

Everyone looked somewhat surprised by the words of the blonde, since he was never to say something in such sad moments. He has always been to give a simple hug and that's it. Regardless, Bokuto was important to him. Even though they only interacted in practice in Tokyo.

"Kageyama-kun, do you want to go to the cafeteria? I can't stay long in a place so full of sad people." Hinata whispered into the black haired boy's ear, who just nodded and followed him into the cafeteria.

"Guys, it's goodbye time." Now Bokuto's mother approached, who was with a puffy face, red eyes as her husband hugged her. "Akaashi, can you speak right?"

Keiji looked at her somewhat doubtfully, but he knew that was something Koutaro wanted him to do and he wouldn't let him down. He wiped his face on the sleeve of his hoodie before getting up, helping little Sarah along the way.

------

A coffin. Three photos, one of Bokuto alone, another of Y/N, and the third is the last photo they both took. Hugged tightly, kissing with both laughing between the kiss. Everyone was inside the great room, listening to the last words directed towards her son, with her husband still hugging her so she could be aware that she does not pass out or something similar.

In the background you could hear the instrumental of A Thousand Years by Christina Perri, one of which Bokuto put on his playlist.

Right next to the coffin was a box with all the letters that Koutaro made for a whole year. For Mrs. Bokuto, that was clear evidence that her son was happy thanks to (Y/N) and that she was the reason for her happiness when he was alive.

"... I'm sure of something at the moment," She had been talking for a long time. About the childhood, adolescence and adulthood of her precious son. For her, Bokuto was everything to stay alive. He was her driving force, along with her husband. "I know (Y / N) is taking care of our favorite ace. And now they are both in total peace. Now, goodbye to both of you. We will love and miss you forever, and I know that you will take care of us from there." She finished, breaking down a bit and hugging her husband tightly as they stepped down from the little makeshift stage.

The place was full of little laughs at the anecdotes and tears.

Now it was Akaashi's turn. It's sad to know that two years ago, it was Bokuto who was speaking to (Y/N) and now it was him speaking for his best friend. He felt a pressure in his chest, in addition to the urge to continue crying as the tears threatened to come out. He took the stage, standing in front of the microphone. Many eyes were on him, which made him feel somewhat pressured of what he should say.

"... God, I don't know what to say right now. There are so many things I have in mind to say to Bokuto-san, that now I feel they are insufficient. I will miss his mood swings and how much he thought to help him, even though I ended up calling to (Y/N)-san for help. It was all a roller coaster ride. "He paused to sigh heavily, running his right hand through his silky black hair, thus continuing. "I remember deciding to join Fukurodani Academy when I watched a game and seeing the way Bokuto played and how lively he was, it made me want to come in and be his setter. And I did for two years. Kind of funny, can you believe it? That Bokuto-san was two months wondering whether to ask out to (Y/N)? It was quite funny and stressful because she would tell me how much she liked him and vice versa. Until one day I couldn't bear it and brought them together to leave them alone. " The room was filled with laughter at the last thing Akaashi said.

Akaashi turned to face the coffin. He put both hands there as he looked at each photo on the wall. Everything was full of flowers.

"Goodbye, Bokuto-san. I hope you find the happiness you deserve. I know you will be fine with (Y/N) -san. I will miss you guys very much and the boys too." He finished as little tears ran down his cheeks and he went to his seat.

------

Everything was beautiful. Flowers of different colors, trees of all kinds and the singing of birds. Bokuto paced around the place, while he hummed a random song. He felt strangely happy and complete in that moment. As if everything had disappeared like the wind. He walked a long way until he reached the end of it, he saw a beautiful girl who became known to him and did not hesitate to approach. Slowly, of course, so as not to scare her into hitting him. He wanted with all his being that she was the girl of his life.

When he was behind her, he didn't think more and touched her shoulder to get his attention. She turned around and her eyes widened in surprise at the spiky-haired boy.

"Bokuto? Baby?" Her voice was still soft and delicate. "You found me!" She didn't wait any longer and hugged him as tightly as she could.

Bokuto's eyes widened as he felt the touch of the love of his life. However, she did not wait to return the hug strongly and the tears did not take long to come out.

"I found you. God, I have you again." She whispered against her neck, still not releasing her.Everything seemed like a dream to both of them and they did not want to wake up.

"You found me, and now it will be forever, Bo." She answered, separating a little from him and with both hands she took the boy by the cheeks, thus leaving a soft and short kiss on the lips that she missed so much. "I love you."

"I love you so much, (y/n). Since you have no idea." It was the last thing Bokuto said before kissing her while loving her. Hands were on (Y/N) small waist.

#anime #anime scenery #haikyuu x female reader #haikyuu bokuto #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu angst #bokuto fanfic #bokuto angst #bokuto x y/n #bokuto x female reader

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sideblogformindtrash · 4 years ago

Note

not a truth serum ask, but it was influenced by an ask. can we get a smidge of recovered (as much as possible) haru and blue? if it fucks w ur writing and you think it will make you stop writing the story dont do it hhhh I'm just putting this out there

[masterlist]

CW: Angst; discussion of death and past abuse;

…He rocked in the chair, admiring the vast fields all around them. He loved coming up here, to the tiny house on top of the mountains. The place was so beautiful… It looked completely isolated from the real world, surrounded by grassy fields, forests and farm animals peacefully grazing on the distance.

Orfeu seemed to be sleeping now, laid on the grass enjoying his magical powers of never getting stung by insects. He seemed to be drooling as well. Haru quietly snapped a photo to nag him with later, then went back to his chair.

He closed his eyes… He could only imagine how wonderful it must have been to be a child on such a gorgeous, peaceful place. If there was one thing he envied on Cecil, was that he was allowed to be a child... And someone loved him. All Haru remembered of his own childhood was snow covered misery.

Inside the tiny house, he could hear Cecil and his mom talking as they made bread together. Haru liked to help her cooking, and she had a lot of country flavors and recipes to teach, but he figured she needed a moment with her son. She was a lovely old lady, that had received all of them with open arms, despite how messed up their little family was.

And all was good …Except he could hear their conversation getting louder and finally ending with Cecil shouting ‘I’m going to get eggs’ and leaving the house with a basket, tears on the corner of his eyes.

Haru jumped from the chair and followed him, Orfeu seeming to just wake up. He walked trough grass field, trying to keep up with Cecil’s fast pace as he walked to the coop.

He follows Cecil inside. He doesn’t even acknowledge him, as he searches the nests for eggs.

“Cecil… Hm… Y-you want to talk?”

..He stops, closes his eyes with a pained expression. He doesn’t look at Haru, only whispers.

“…I think she wishes I had died that day”

“Cecil-“

“She, she is, is nice and all, s-she doesn’t want me, me to notice. But, I, I can tell Haru. She, she looks at me and she, she is so sad… She smiles but she is, is in pain a-and… I, I w-want her to s-see that I’m b-better, that I’m s-s-till me… But, but maybe I’m not. I, I’m not the s-son s-she knew and, I keep s-screwing up...” he angrily whipped a tear, throwing some eggs at the basket, so carelessly some might have cracked “S-s-she is pain. S-s-she had, had accepted that, that I was dead and was was moving o-on b-b-ut now s-she is in p-pain again…”

Haru carefully placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. Of course she was in pain but… None of them were to blame. Life had been unkind.

“…She loves you. And it hurts when someone we love is… is hurting” he offered a sad smile “D-doesn’t mean she doesn’t want you or, or love who you are now. Jjust that she wished you were okay. She wants you to be happy”

“Yeah b-but… Maybe s-she would be, be b-better off without me…”

“…She kept your room intact” Haru commented “…Even years after she thought you were gone. And the look on her face when she saw you… She is in pain, but not because she doesn’t want you”

“…B-but it was n-n-not me she was waiting for” he insisted “S-she wanted her son. She got… fucking Blue instead. T-there is… a distance between us, n-now, and I feel, I feel like we can’t never t-truly change that…”

Haru pulled him into a hug, just softly running fingers through his hair. Distance. Oceans keeping them apart.

“You’ve been through so much Cecil… Don’t you dare give up now” he cupped Cecil’s face “…Be kind to yourself. You deserve it”

…he softly pushed Haru away and opened a frail smile.

“I’m, I’m just glad she d-doesn’t have internet” he chuckled, the way he did to avoid crying instead.

“If you wanna stay here longer… I can try and re-schedule my students, you know…?” Haru offers “We could sleep here today…”

“No, no is fine…” he shook his head “I’m fed up with the country life already. Look at this stupid egg”

…He raised an egg that was far too small, before tossing it with the others. It was completely meaningless, he just didn’t want to admit that he didn’t want to face his mom anymore. Not today, anyway.

“It must have been nice to grow up here” Haru commented, the chicken picking around them.

“As a child, it was heaven. As a teenager? Not so much. There is nothing around here…” Cecil shrugged, then smiled nostalgically “When I went to college I had no clue what a big city was even like. Fully naive country boy. I was terrified but… I felt like it was better than being stuck here forever”

…They walked back to the house, Cecil’s mother was having a chat with Orfeu now, both sitting on the grass, Orfeu making a little flower crown. She smiled at them and Orfeu smiled.

“I…. I got the eggs mom…” he whispered, not wanting to look her in the eye.

But she was having none of it. She got up and pulled him into one of her bear rugs, old, but strong arms from years of farm work, kissing his cheeks.

“…Thank you darling” she picked one of his cheeks affectionately “We could make a pie, wouldn’t that be nice?”

Cecil takes a deep breath and tries to smile.

“…Yeah. It, it would” he looks at Haru, a ‘help me’ look “Can he come too?”

“Of course” his mom smiled. She liked all of them “Little Haru is always a help in kitchen. Orfeu dear, you can help us with the dishes”

…He heard Orfeu laugh, as Cecil and his mom went inside again.

“Sure. Just a second” …He approached “Is he okay?”

Haru nods.

“Are you?”

“Yah. Don’t worry so much…” he smiles “….You were drooling”

“Lies” Orfeu squints “All lies”

“…I have a picture”

“…Dammit” he laughs and messes Haru’s hair.

“Hey!” he slaps Orfeu’s hands away “Stop fooling around. We must bake a pie”

“Sure. Just a thing first…” Orfeu picks up the flower crown he was building, placing it on Haru’s head “There you go”

…He blushes.

“Thank you…”

“It’s nothing, your majesty” he makes a dramatic reverence, pulling the house door open for Haru. He chuckles and gets in.

#countrycore bitches #orfeu and haru #blue needs a tag #ask #I FEEEL LIKE THERE IS OCEAAAAANS BETWEEN YOU AAAAAND MEEEE ft. Arya Stark

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what-is-your-plan-today · 4 years ago

Text

Leave No One Behind

Chapter 11- Mama Don’t Preach Part 1

Co-written with @icanfeelastormbrewing

Episode Summary: It’s Hannah’s turn to head home for a week to see her Mama, and there’s a surprise request waiting for her too. Meanwhile, back in Sudan Ari’s left holding the baby...or in this case, puppy…

Episode Warnings: Bad Language words. Smut (NSFW, 18+ only)- in Part 2

Episode Pairings: Ari Levinson x OFC Hannah Horowitz

Song for Episode: Only You- Yazoo

A/N: This is a big chapter so split into Parts to allow you to read as and when. Part 2 will be posted soon after this. Translations: “Me cago en todo” For Fucks sake. “Por el amor de Dios” For the love of God “mi niña”- My Girl All I needed was the love you gave, all I needed for another day, and all I ever knew, only you.

Series Master List // Main Masterlist

Hannah looked out of the window, taking in the familiar sights as the plane got ready to land and a few minutes later, as the wheels hit the runway and the passengers cheered she couldn't help but sigh. She was home. Just as she unfastened her seatbelt and waited for the sign signalling they could disembark, her mind wandered to the moment she had said goodbye a few hours earlier that morning. She felt a pang of sadness at the image of Simon trying to follow the truck as Ari had pulled out of the resort to drive her to the airport, a couple of hours earlier than initially planned-she may or may not have told the team her flight was a few hours earlier than it was so that her and Ari could grab a drink at a small coffee shop not far from the airport. It was hardly what one could call a ‘sweep you off your feet’ date but it was nice to get out alone, just the two of them. It had felt good that Ari and her had been able to experience a certain level of normalcy before the inevitable and emotional goodbye and promises to try not to miss each other too much.

She wandered through passport control and after picking up her bag she went out into the arrivals of Ben Gurion airport almost on autopilot but she smiled hard when she saw her Mama and, just like that, her eyes filled with tears as she hurried forward and hugged the woman tightly. After the emotional reunion they headed back to the house, Hannah's childhood family home, where she had been living with her Mama since she had left the apartment her and Andy had rented once they’d gotten married. Unable to stay there alone after his death, she’d moved home and had remained there up until the moment Ari had come into the clinic turning her whole world upside down. As her Mama opened the door Hannah smiled at the familiar décor of the hallway and let out a little, happy sigh as she stepped over the threshold. It smelt like home, it felt like home... it was home.

Hannah headed upstairs and ditched her bag in her room, thinking to herself about how the last time she’d been in here was before she left in January. Back then she’d never have guessed how things would have turned out for her so far in 1980. She glanced at her reflection in the mirror and decided that she needed a shower so turned to grab some fresh clothes out of a drawer, and as she did so she spotted a few photos of her and Andy on the unit. She glanced at them, a soft smile on her face and then turned to look around her room at the numerous other snaps of the pair of them dotted in various places in the room. She contemplated moving them for a moment before she finally came to a decision and did just that, popping them carefully in a drawer which she slowly closed after a last, nostalgic look at Andy's handsome face. She’d loved him, there was no doubt about that. But time moved on and she was finally ready to move on with it now. Shaking those sad memories from her mind she went into the bathroom to shower and twenty minutes later she made her way down to the kitchen at the back of the house which overlooked the large communal garden they shared with 4 other homes.

She found her Mama was stood at the stove, preparing dinner, and Hannah approached, wrapping her arms round her from behind, hugging her close.

"Nothing like your food mama. Not that Aziz’s isn’t good because it is but, well, there’s nothing like yours." she trailed off.

Her Mama turned to look at her kissing her head. "I’m making your favourite from when you were young, mi niña."

"Beef wellington?" Hannah asked, her eyes lighting up.

Mama nodded and Hannah gave a groan. "Sammy is gonna be so jealous when I get back."

"You don’t have beef in Sudan?" the woman asked as she stirred what looked like some kind of gravy in a pot.

"Half the time I haven’t got a clue what I’m eating to be honest, other than when it’s fish. Last time we had some form of steak I think it was camel."

Mama laughed heartily. "Your brother must be having a hard time, he’s always been the picky one."

"He’s still a pain in the ass, mama." Hannah said as she moved from her mother's frame and leaned casually against the counter.

Mama looked at Hannah spotting the crease on her brow immediately and, raising an eyebrow, she asked. "Are we still talking about food, honey?"

Hannah shrugged. "In general, and you look just like him when you do that, stop it."

"When I do what?"

"Raise your eyebrow and look at me like that."

"Like what?" the woman, whose eyes were on the pots and pans in front of her again, asked.

Hannah groaned with frustration. "Come on Mama, you know what like."

Mama sighed and, setting the wooden spoon aside, turned to look at her daughter, her hands falling down to her hips in a typical mother stance. "The only thing I know is my daughter, who I haven’t seen in months, looks more gorgeous, relaxed and happier than when she left... In fact, more so than I’ve seen her in years. Which is ironic really considering what you’re doing out there."

Hannah blushed a little at her mum's last sentence but decided to roll with it. "Well it’s nice to be doing something mama, back in the thick of it all so to speak."

Now she saw her mother was sporting a wide smile, not a sympathetic smile but a knowing one. And Hannah knew she must have anticipated something like that, if anything her mother was clever. "Something uh?" the woman said.

Hannah looked at her blankly, not understanding what she meant, or rather not wanting to give in that easily. "Yeah, the resort and the job."

"I know that look Hannah, You’re my daughter remember, I raised you. Something tells me it’s not simply all down to those people you’re helping." her mother baited her again.

"No…I…it’s not…" Hannah's train of thought stopped as she spotted her mum's eyes skate down her neck just before she nodded to her necklace, and instinctively she reached up to touch it. Mama smiled and whether it was at the necklace or at her sudden need to touch it for comfort, Hannah couldn't tell.

"That’s pretty."

Hannah smiled back at her before speaking. "It was a birthday present. Along with my watch, look."

She stretched her forearm and turned her wrist slightly to show her mother the watch but the woman wasn't one to be fooled and smiled before taking her eyes off the watch and nodding back at the necklace. "What is it, some kind of bee?"

"It’s a firefly."

"I take it that it was from the only person who calls you that?" her mother asked then and Hannah flinched. She had served her mother the opportunity on a silver plate and now she felt herself growing warm again under her mom’s scrutiny, but, much to her dismay, Mrs N was not letting go. "I’ve got to admit, it was a nice surprise when Ethan told me what Ari was planning to do for your birthday."

Hannah then let out a low laugh, shaking her head at her mother’s tenacity. "Why don’t you just ask me, Mama?"

"Why would I ask when I already know?"

"And what is it that you think you know?" Hannah asked, trying to sound as calm as possible.

Her mother looked at her for a couple of seconds before delivering the final blow. "That you and Ari are together. And not for the first time."

Hannah gasped. That last part had shocked her big time, she wasn't prepared for that. "You knew about us the first time?"

Mama nodded. "I did, yes."

"How did you…?"

"Once again Hannah, I’m your mother. It was pretty obvious to my eyes that something was going on there between you two back in the day. And then you started going out almost every night and your friends used to call asking for you, so you clearly weren’t with them. And you were glowing, at the time. Just like you did when you were with Andy, and just like you are now."

Hannah looked down shyly before speaking. "Ok, so clearly I wasn’t as good at hiding it as I thought." she snorted and then paused. "Did you know about why…" she began to ask but stopped mid-sentence as she shook her head. "Actually, it doesn’t matter."

"Why you two split up? Yeah, I do. And I was mad at your brother for weeks." her mother conceded with a sigh.

“Seems like everyone knew bar me." she muttered absent mindedly.

"Sadly it's always like that, honey." Mama stated while rubbing her daughter's arm reassuringly before resuming her work over the stove.

"Did you know it was Andy who told him? About me and Ari I mean."

Mama snapped her head at Hannah, looking at her visibly shocked. "No, No I didn’t."

"Well it was." Hannah snorted. "Ironic huh, I married the guy that broke me up from the first man I…"

"You loved?" her mother asked, finishing the sentence for her, apparently recovered from the shocking news her beloved late son-in-law had some sneaky ways in him.

Hannah gave a little smile and nodded.

"So how did Sammy react to it this time round…not that I need to ask." Mama chuckled as she bent over to check the meat cooking in the oven.

"You know him. Made a huge fuss, punched Ari again." at that Hannah snorted. "Ari let him have the first one but the second time, well I had to stop him from ripping Sammy’s head off."

"Must have been something worth seeing. No doubt I’ll hear all about it in a few weeks when he comes home."

"No doubt you will. He seemed a little better after my birthday party, and the last mission.” Hannah bit her lip, her mind straying back to the disaster of the mission and she looked at the floor.

Her Mama gently touched her arm. "Ethan told me about the woman you helped and how her baby didn’t make it. Sweetie, that must have been awful."

"Yeah it was…" Hannah paused, frowning at her mother "Hang on, Ethan told you? When did you speak to him, mum?"

"Oh he took me out for dinner last week." she brushed her daughter's question off.

Hannah blinked at her mother’s matter of fact tone. "Ethan took you out for dinner?"

"Yes he did. We had a great time. You look surprised honey.” Her Mama’s eyes flashed with mischief “Is it that hard to believe your mother still gets it in her?"

"Oh my God…mama, that’s…ergh…"

"Hey, you’re acting like your brother now." Mama protested.

"Me cago en todo." Hanna cursed in Spanish earning, a scoff from her mother, and then she looked at her mom. "Mama…did you put out on a first date?"

"Young lady, watch your mouth." she said and Hannah laughed. "And have some respect for your mother." she paused for a moment as if considering what to say next. "Besides, what if I did? It's not like you and Ari are playing chess in that damned diving resort every night, is it?"

"OH MY GOD YOU SO DID!" Hannah exclaimed as she brought her right hand to cover her slack jawed mouth.

"Por el amor de Dios, Hannah. I’m not discussing this with you, now go wash your hands…dinner is ready."

"I just showered, why do I need to wash my hands?" Hannah offered somewhat feistily.

"You don’t, I just wanted to shut you up."

"God, mama, how am I supposed to look Ethan in the face tomorrow?" Hannah whined as she helped her mother with the oven tray.

"Same as I’m supposed to look at Ari in his, when I know what you’ve been up to." her mum retorted.

"Oh, for..."

"Mind you, I can’t blame you mi niña, Ari is a good looking guy. If I was 30 years younger…" the woman trailed, smirking.

"Mama, STOP!"

"What, it’s true?" Mama shrugged, amused by her daughter's reaction.

Hannah just shook her head before she grinned and pointed her finger at her mother "Well hands off, he’s mine."

"I don’t doubt it, honey." her mother declared, a wide smile spreading over her gentle face.

****

The next morning Hannah woke up and it took her a while to remember where she was. It wasn’t the sound of the waves crashing on the beach she could hear, but car horns and traffic. She recognised almost instantly though the smell of her ma's favourite soap in the sheets, but whilst her bed was comfy and familiar it felt odd. There was something missing. No Simon, no Ari, and that meant more to her than all the commodities she could ever have in Tel Aviv.

Well maybe she could trade sleeping snuggled to Ari for being able to eat Beef Wellington once a week… She chuckled and shook her head at her own absurd thoughts. Considering she spent years sleeping alone after Andy died, it hadn’t taken her long to get used to sharing a bed again, and if she was completely honest it was unnerving how she didn’t like Ari not being there, she knew it was stupid but still. She stretched and laid still in bed for a little while more as there were no breakfast duties to get to, but she suddenly remembered she did have a meeting with Ethan at HQ. Hannah cringed at the memory of her conversation with her mother last night, groaning to herself at the thought of the pair of them having dinner and… whatever. How was she going to be able to look him in the face? Shuddering at the thought she threw back the duvet and headed for her morning shower taking her time because she could, and also because she missed decent water temperature and pressure.

After her shower Hannah got dressed and went down to have breakfast with Mama. They sat and watched a little TV, another one of the things they quickly got used to not really having much chance to do in Sudan, before the car arrived to take Hannah to Mossad HQ. Once there she went through the security checks and headed up to Ethan's office, smiling to his secretary who told her to go in.

No sooner had she knocked lightly on the door before pulling it open, Ethan stood up from his desk, a smile on his face as he strode over and pulled her into a huge hug.

"You look well, Hannah."

"Thanks Ethan."

"Must be all that sun, sea and sand huh?" he said, pulling back to take her appearance in better.

"And life or death situations…" she smiled fondly at the man.

Ethan chuckled and directed her over to the couch where she took a seat at one side as Ethan headed out and asked his secretary to get them a coffee each. Then he closed the door and sat opposite her. They chatted for a little bit, just about how the resort was going, how everyone was, a debrief of sorts on the last mission which Hannah wasn’t all that keen on reliving, but she knew she had to. Then their coffees arrived and Hannah took the time to compose herself, the emotion of talking about what had happened to the baby girl having choked her a little. She took a sip, then eyed Ethan and smiled.

"My mom says you’ve been out on a date."

Ethan paused, his stoic stance faltering a little, then looked at Hannah. "I’ve…taken her for dinner, yes."

"Has she seen your silk robe?" she attacked again.

"How do you know about that?"

Hannah grinned at the sight of Ethan's creased brow. "Ari told me."

"Course he did." he sighed. "And that reminds me... Sarah Levinson called last week asking me when you were home." Hannah blanched at Ethan's words and he noticed. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

Hannah hesitated. She wanted to take another sip of her coffee in order to buy herself some seconds but with a swift glance she realised her cup was already empty, and that was all the confirmation Ethan needed. The experienced agent rolled his eyes at her before stating the obvious. "I knew this would happen."

Hannah shook her head. "Why does Sarah want to know when I’m home?"

"Reading between the lines I think she wants to see you." Ethan said, his gaze never leaving Hannah's face.

"But why? I’ve met her like 5 times, if that!" Hannah sort of protested, rubbing her sweaty palms over her denim clad thighs.

"I think that’s obvious, you’re fucking her husband." Ethan shot, bluntly.

"They’re separated Ethan. And it’s not like that. You make it sound so crass, we’re not fucking…" she trailed off, her initial offended tone dying as she spoke.

"I know." Ethan agreed, his voice softer this time and stood up and headed to his desk. He reached into the drawer for a piece of paper which he gave to Hannah once he had checked it was the one he wanted. "She requested I ask you to call."

As Hannah took the paper from him there was a knock on the door and it swung open to reveal a short, slight, grey-haired man dressed in grey slacks and a light blue, short sleeved shirt. Hannah shoved the piece of paper in her pocket without giving much thought to what it meant and smiled at the man as he stepped into the room.

"I read those fucking reports you left on my table, Ethan, and let me tell you…"

Ethan cleared his throat and nodded to Hannah who blinked at the man, slightly amused at how angry he was despite his unassuming appearance. Ethan gestured to Hannah. "This is Hannah Horowitz. Hannah, meet Barack Isaacs, Mossad Chief."

Hannah stood up and shook his hand. "It’s a pleasure Sir to finally meet you in person."

"And you Mrs Horowitz. I’ve heard a lot about you from Ethan, and of course I knew your father. He was a good man. Taken far too soon." Isaacs said, not an ounce of anger in his voice or features now.

Hannah smiled. "Thank you Sir."

A few minutes later, after having said her goodbyes to both men who would be now no doubt be discussing the reports that had earned all those expletives from Isaacs’ part, Hannah headed down to the car and climbed in the back to head home. She watched the familiar buildings as they moved past and realised that the last time she had been in HQ was when Ethan broke the news of Andy’s death to her, in that very same office she’d been in today. She hadn’t even thought about it until now, but she remembered Isaacs calling her Mrs Horowitz and, now that she came to think of it, Ethan had introduced her to him as such. And whilst that’s what she was, the truth was she didn’t feel like it any more. She felt a little pang in her stomach at her own thoughts, a pang that she couldn’t quite place. Maybe it was guilt, she pondered, but what did she have to feel guilty about? Andy was dead. Had been for years and she had every right to move on.

Then the car stopped at a traffic light and her eyes drifted to a shop on the corner, nothing special, it was an ordinary grocery store but she remembered her and Ari buying a bottle of wine from there for one of their many clandestine nights in at his apartment. They had snuggled up to the latest Led Zeppelin LP and made out a bit, in fact that was the first night Ari had ever made her come using his very talented fingers. And, as the car set off, Hannah realised that the memories of her so-called hidden relationship with Ari were all so vivid in her head now, especially after so many years of blocking them out. She sighed and her hand fell absentmindedly into her pocket and curled around the piece of paper with Sarah’s number written on it.

By the time she got home she had decided. She was going to call Sarah and see what she wanted.

****

Ari had no idea how it had happened but Simon was missing. He’d searched the resort up and down and was currently going bananas looking for him around the beach and cursing the day he had backed Hannah up in keeping the damned dog. He was legit shitting his pants when suddenly he heard him barking as he rounded the rocks with Max and Jake hot on his tail. Thank fuck, Ari thought. He might keep his head on his shoulders after all. He gave a sharp whistle and Simon looked up and then set off hurtling towards him. When the dog was close enough he jumped up at him and Ari caught him in his arms. "Hey, buddy calm down." Simon was whining and whimpering and licking Ari’s face as he rubbed the pup's back. "What the fuck has gotten into you?" Simon continued his little noises and nudged into Ari’s face and he glanced up at Max and Jake who were now within earshot. "You pup-napped my dog." Ari glared at them.

"It’s Hannah’s dog." Max deadpanned.

"He’s more mine than he is yours." Ari snapped, still angry at his two teammates for taking the dog without letting him know. And as that was just what he needed to appease himself, Sammy appeared, watching the exchange with an amused air.

"Only because you’re fucking his mom." Max mumbled.

Ari glared at him. "I heard that, dickhead."

"Technically he’s right." Jake quipped.

"Technically you’re an idiot." Ari bit back at Jake.

He was on edge, he was fully aware of that but there was nothing he could do about it. They had taken his fucking dog and it had almost given him a heart attack, not helping the bleak mood that had fallen over him ever since Hannah had left two days before.

"Technically?" Sammy asked and Simon growled. It was like a reflex action the dog had every time Sammy spoke.

"Never, ever take my fucking dog without my permission, you hear me?" Ari hissed glaring at Max and Jake.

Once again he knew he was overreacting but he couldn’t help it. If anything were to happen to this dog, he'd be a dead man, plus he’d miss him too. Ari looked at them once more and then headed off, Simon held to his chest like a small child, with both his arms underneath the dog's butt supporting him, Simon’s paws on Ari’s shoulders, head looking around. He nodded to Rachel, who walked past him towards the spot on the sand where Jake, Max and Sammy were, and without saying a word he retreated to his hut.

All three men stood put for a moment watching him leave and then Max turned to Sammy. "God I can’t wait for your sister to come back, he’s being a pain in the ass."

"As grossed out as it makes me I kinda agree." Sammy acknowledged Max's comment.

"Blue balls don’t suit him." Jake groaned.

"Leave him alone you guys, he’s in love. Wait until it happens to you." Rachel, who had reached them now and was shading her eyes from the sun with the palm of her hand, warned them. All three rolled their eyes and she scoffed. "What?"

"Nothing mom." Max quipped, earning a slap round the back of his head from Rachel.

"I mean seriously though, what were you thinking taking the dog? You know he’s in charge of him and he’s been on edge since Han left. Don’t make it worse."

"See, even you recognise he’s being an insufferable bitch." Max whined.

"Yes and you’re making it worse Maxwell." Rachel looked at him.

"Whatever, I’m hungry now."

"What else is new?" Jake scoffed before stating "You were born hungry."

"All babies are born hungry, asshole." Max snapped as he started walking towards the main building.

"You’re the asshole. The Maltese asshole." Jake shouted at him, following suit.

Rachel groaned, following the bickering pair up the sand. Sammy dropped an arm around her shoulder, giving her a squeeze and she shook her head. She really needed Hannah there to help her deal with the bunch of overgrown kids. So much for the trained Mossad agents they were supposed to be.

By the time the sun had begun to set and they were sat at the table having dinner everyone had calmed down bar Ari who persisted in being a little bitch. There he was trying to eat whilst Simon was on his lap as the fucking dog wouldn’t leave him alone now. Jake and Max must have played some tricks on the pup for him to be so anxious and clingy ever since he got back to Ari.

Assholes.

Sammy, in turn, was glaring at Simon as every time he spoke, the dog's lip would curl up in a snarl.

"What is your fucking problem?" Sammy snapped at the dog.

"Hey, don’t talk to him like that." Ari warned him, pointing at Sammy with a fork.

"Really, Ari?" Sammy scoffed and Simon growled again at the sound of his voice.

Ari sighed. "Si, quit it for fucks sake."

Rachel who was desperately trying to have a peaceful dinner without having to intervene, again, didn't miss the look Jake was giving at Sammy while mouthing "Si??" so she glared at the pair of them before she cleared her throat.

"We got a letter this morning, from the tourist board."

Ari turned to her "Yeah? What do they want?"

Rachel took the letter from her shorts pocket and handed it to him. She wasn't planning on playing that card, she had just shoved the letter there just in case but the boys' attitude had left her no choice. "See for yourself."

Ari pushed Simon off his lap and took it. He unfolded it, his eyes scanning the words for a few seconds before he nodded. "They want to visit this weekend. I’ll call Madibo tomorrow morning, tell him it’s ok."

"Yeah…you checked the date?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah it says Thursday…so?" Max, Jake and Sammy exchanged glances and Ari looked around with an air of frustration. "What?" "Hannah’s back on Thursday." Sammy reminded him, speaking quietly as if he was walking on eggshell.

"And?"

"Nothing." he shook his head. "I’ll pick her up from the airport if you’re busy."

Fuck Ari thought before pausing and shaking his head. "No need. I’ll go. You don’t need me here."

"Yes we do. That letter says he wants to see you." Rachel pointed at the letter.

Ari frowned and reached for it again before groaning as she was right. "Fucks sake. What time are they coming? Maybe I can…"

Once again Rachel, the voice of reason, cut him off. "No you can’t. They’ll be here by 11. Her flight gets in just after."

Ari looked at her as if she had just slapped him on his face.

"Ari I’ll go, it’s not an issue." Sammy offered.

Ari just nodded as he didn't trust his voice to come out right at that moment. He was raging inside, his mind ticking off all the curses possible. And as such he spent the rest of the meal sulking in silence before he excused himself and went back to his hut. As far as he was concerned his evening was over. One week, one fucking week without her and he had just been denied the possibility of picking her up. Instead he would have to put up with Madibo and who knows who else from the fucking corrupted tourist board.

With Simon whining, as he had clearly detected his dad was upset, and snuggling round his head on the pillow Ari laid on her bed for what seemed like hours, contemplating what a needy bastard he’d turned into (or rather Hannah had made him into) in such a short period of time, before sleep overcame him.

**** As Hannah made the 10 minute walk to the small Café she had arranged to meet Sarah in, the nearer she got the more nervous she was. She’d only ever met Sarah a handful of times, the last one being at her and Ari’s wedding. When she reached the café door her hands were sweating so she wiped them on her jeans and pushed the door open. As soon as she stepped in she spotted Sarah sat at a table near the back. She hadn’t changed much, was just as pretty as the last time Hannah had seen her. Striking cheekbones, deep brown eyes, light red hair. From the photo Hannah had seen of Maya which Ari kept on his nightstand she could see where the girl had gotten her looks from. She was very like her mother but had inherited Ari’s hair colour and face shape.

Sarah looked up, and gave Hannah a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes as Hannah approached the table. She stood up and offered a stiff hand to Hannah, which Hannah took, the shake very business-like.

“It’s been a long time.” Sarah spoke in her deep, American accent.

“Yeah, it has.” Hannah agreed as Sarah made to sit down again. Hannah followed and took the seat opposite her, hanging her purse on the chair back. No sooner had they done that than someone was over to take their order. They both requested a coffee each and when the waitress disappeared Sarah spoke.

“Thank you for agreeing to meet me. I wasn’t sure you’d even call so..”

“Well it would have been rude not to, plus I also have a letter for Maya from Ari. Saves me posting it I suppose.” Hannah smiled and reached for her purse, retrieving the thick envelope. She handed it to Sarah.

“Ari said Maya wanted some photos of Simon- my, well, the group’s dog really and she wanted to see the resort too so-“ she nodded to the envelope “- there’s some in there for her.”

“Thanks.” Sarah took the envelope, exchanging it for a slightly smaller one. “I also have a letter here for Ari from Maya, would you-“

“Of course.” Hannah nodded, taking it form her.

“You know she asks about you in there.” Sarah nodded to the letter “Her and Ari talked about you when he was home. He told her you picked her little beaded bag out, which for the record she still carries everywhere.”

Hannah blushed a little “I’m glad she liked it.”

“Are there any photos of you in here?” Sarah tapped the envelope and Hannah frowned, not quite sure what she was getting at.

“No.” she shook her head. But before she had chance to say anything else their coffee arrived. Both thanked the lady who set the cups down, then busied themselves adding sugar, Hannah stirring hers a little more than necessary before she broke the silence, deciding to ask the question that had been on her mind since Ethan gave her the piece of paper with the other woman’s number on it. “Sarah, why did you want to see me? We’ve hardly ever spoken before, certainly not like this.”

“Curiosity I suppose.” Sarah shrugged

“Curiosity? About what?”

“About you.”

“Me?”

Sarah nodded, taking a breath “Will you be honest with me Hannah?”

Hanna nodded, steeling herself as she waited for the inevitable question about whether her and Ari were back together. She knew Ari hadn’t confirmed it to Sarah when he visited, because, well they hadn’t actually labelled what they were then, neither of them knew, but she also knew he hadn’t denied it.

“Do you love him?” Sarah asked.

“Oh…” that had surprised Hannah. She swallowed, “Sarah, I-“

“Because I know he loves you.”

Hannah took a deep breath before she shrugged “Yeah, yeah I do.”

Sarah nodded “In that case then I wish you good luck because you’re gonna need it.”

Hannah frowned and swallowed some of her coffee “What do you mean?”

“I mean when you all finish this mission and you’re not in your little fantasy reality anymore and you’re no longer his ‘bond girl’-”

“Hey, now, just wait a second-” Hannah interrupted a little tetchily but Sarah continued, ignoring her.

“-because he’ll never quit Hannah.” Sarah looked at her “-hell he wasn’t even there when Maya was born because he was stranded in some god forsaken part of Saudi Arabia.”

“He regrets that, he told me.” Hannah sighed and Sarah shrugged.

“I’m sure he does but his wife being 8 months pregnant wasn’t enough to stop him going. His own daughter since has never been enough to stop him going. This life, this sense of duty he has to those people, whilst it’s admirable it’s consuming him. And I just want you to know what you’re letting yourself in for. He dragged you back into all this, Hannah. He won’t be as easy to drag back out.”

Hannah looked at her, mouth hanging open a little as she wasn’t sure what to say. Part of her was pissed off, part of her felt guilty, and beneath it all a pang of sympathy. Ari hadn’t been a great husband or father, and Hannah knew that.

“That said, maybe he will quit for you.” Sarah continued “I mean, maybe me and Maya were simply just not enough…”

“Sarah, it wasn’t like that.” Hannah shook her head, sighing “I won’t make excuses for him being a shit husband and a lousy father because there are none to be made, and he knows that.”

“Yeah, he said all this when he came home.” Sarah gave a huff of laughter “He actually seemed different, happier almost, he was so relaxed with Maya and I get now that’s because of you.”

Hannah took a deep breath. “I kind of feel like I should be apologising for something here Sarah, I’m not sure what but-“

Sarah smiled “It isn’t your fault he’s been in love with you for the past 10 years.”

“Sarah…”

“You ever asked him why we weren’t at your wedding?” Sarah suddenly change the line of the conversation and Hannah looked at her, blinking “It was because he couldn’t bear to watch you marry someone else.”

“No, that’s... that’s not…”

“Ask him. He never admitted it but it was obvious. I was always second best in his eyes.”

“Ari loved you Sarah, I know he did, he’s told me.” Hannah implored “You’re the mother of his child.”

“Oh I don’t doubt he did.” Sarah smiled “Just not as much as he loved you. And here we are, he’s got you back in the end.”

At that Hannah felt the nerve twitch in her jaw, pissed at the nerve of the woman sat opposite her, blatantly trying to blame her for Ari’s attitude in their marriage. Like she was responsible for whatever he’d done over the last 8 or however many years it had been. She desperately wanted to defend Ari but couldn’t, simply because he had been an ass hole to Sarah and she wasn’t about to stick up for him when he didn’t’ deserve it, regardless of the fact she was dating him. But, she wasn’t about to sit here and take this crap from his estranged wife, especially not when Hannah had been through enough shit herself. She took a deep breath, folded her arms and arched an eyebrow. “Yeah, I guess he did. And all it took was a dead husband and a divorce huh?”

If her harsh, sarcastic tone bothered Sarah the other woman didn’t show it as she simply looked at Hannah with a small smile on her face, not a shred of anger on her face as she spoke “Well, fate has a wicked sense of humour.”

PART 2

#leave no one behind #ari levinson x ofc #ari levinson fanfiction #ari levinson #red sea diving resort #red sea diving resort fan fic #fan fiction

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wiypt-writes · 4 years ago

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Leave No One Behind

Ch 11- Mama Don’t Preach Part 1 Co written with @icanfeelastormbrewing

Episode Warnings: Bad Language words. Smut (NSFW, 18+ only)- in Part 2

Episode Pairings: Ari Levinson x OFC Hannah Horowitz

A/N: This is a big chapter! Part 2 will be posted later this week.

Leave No One Behind Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Chapter 10

Translations: “Me cago en todo” For Fucks sake. “Por el amor de Dios” For the love of God “mi niña”- My Girl