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vettelsvee · 24 days ago

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GOODBYES ARE BITTERSWEET | Sebastian Vettel ✩₊˚.⋆ PART 5: I'LL NEVER LEAVE... NEVER MIND [PREVIOUS PART] [NEXT PART]

goodbyes are bittersweet masterlist | wattpad f1 masterlist | ao3 | ask anything or let's talk!

ferrari sebastian vettel x ex gf!female reader

word count: 4437

summary: after not seeing each other in almost five years, seb and y/n finally meet with just one purpose for her: telling seb they have a 4 year old daughter. will y/n be able to tell him?

warnings: mentions of sex. i think nothing else but i literally cried while writing this. i recommend that you listen to loml by taylor swift while reading this hehe

taglist: [ @saltycomicsanimalssalad @hc-dutch @mycenterfold @simplyamberj @spitesfvl-blog @jaydaaasworld @lottalove4evelyn @zoeyjadetice2010 @jehun @ferralari @cosmoscoffeee @mcmuppet @myescapefromthislife @sleutherclaw @youre-on-your-ownkid ]

a/n: i'm finally back! sorry you had to wait this long to get a new chapter but writers block had me going like crazy, as well as my mental health in general. i had something else planned for today BUT be aware of what I'm posting tomorrow since you might like it! christmas is coming soon and i have a surprise ready for you. let me remind you that feedback and reposts are truly appreciated. and also comment me your thoughts and theories on the story pls! missed you so much guys, thank you for everything, love you all <3

May 15th Heppenheim, Germany

“Y/N, remember that you need to be careful with what you say to Seb. I know you want to tell him about Emily, but also consider whether today is the right time. Imagine if…”

You stop listening to Hanna the moment her lips utter your daughter’s name. Instead, your mind started creating a thousand different scenarios about what could happen when you saw your ex-boyfriend today. Your gaze remained fixed on the mirror in your room.

You only returned home five days ago, but it felt like an eternity.

You knew perfectly well why, or rather, you knew perfectly well who was to blame for your distorted sense of time: Sebastian Vettel, of course.

The trip to London felt like a fresh start. While the main reason to go was your meeting with Capital Records to discuss what your near future might hold, you considered it as an opportunity to rethink what you wanted to do with your life from now on.

You had just turned 30, and the only thing you longed for was to start this new decade with a clean slate in every possible way. That, of course, included facing your past mistakes and recognizing your faults, one of which you might be about to commit today.

Hanna acted as some sort of mediator between you and Seb because, no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t bring yourself to send him even the simplest of messages. The driver seemed to understand, as he told Hanna not to worry, that he understood, and that all you needed to do was show up without standing him up.

Despite having agreed to meet at your house, you decided to dress up a little to present yourself in the best way possible. After spending far more time than you’d like to admit choosing what to wear, you settled on a light blue knee-length dress and white Converse sneakers, with a bracelet your daughter made (or better said your mother made, just Emily took credit for).

"Y/N, are you even listening to me?"

The reflection of your best friend in the mirror startled you. You turned towards her, trying to maintain the calm you’ve lacked since returning from London. Exactly five days that have felt like five years.

Like the five years since you last saw Seb.

"Hey, cat got your tongue or what?" insisted the blonde. "Seriously, Y/N, I want you to be speechless, but preferably when you and Seb take the conversation from the couch to the bed and he makes you scream his name again just like he used to do when..."

"Hanna, for God's sake, shut up! Seb and I are only going to talk about..."

"I know, I know, I was just trying to make you laugh. You know I like to..."

Suddenly, the doorbell rang.

If you were restless before, pacing back and forth in your room, checking that there was no trace of Emily in the house for Seb to find, now you were frozen like a statue.

You looked at Hanna, and she looked back at you. You shrugged, but Hanna just put her exaggeratedly unfriendly faces.

"Hanna, no..."

"It's Seb, Y/N! It's just Seb, for heaven's sake," she interrupted, and you cut her off just as fast.

"It's the Seb I haven't seen in five years!" you stammered, feeling the anxiety taking over. "Seriously, Hanna, this was a very, very bad idea. I don’t even know why I asked you to tell him to come and..."

"Because he's the father of your daughter, and your only goal is to tell him!" she yelled, trying not to raise her voice too much but failing miserably. You hoped to God Vettel didn’t hear that.

"Hanna..."

"Since I know you're not going to open the door, I'll do it myself. Stay here or come down, do whatever you want, but I'll tell Seb to come find you because clearly, you can't handle welcoming your guest," she declared.

Without saying anything else, she strided out of your room. You could only follow her, practically tripping down the stairs, legs trembling like a teenager on her first date. Your pulse was pounding in your temples, while your mind kept screaming at your body to calm down.

As soon as you stepped onto the ground floor, you saw Hanna opening the door. Her cheerful voice broke the silence, asking Seb how he was and, to your surprise, inviting him in.

You inched closer, not quite enough for them to notice you. Then you stopped, inspecting Seb from head to toe, as if you didn't already know every inch of his body by heart. Even though you were used to seeing him on TV and social media daily, it felt like you haven’t seen him in all this time you’ve been out of touch. He was wearing a slightly worn-out white t-shirt and jeans. His hair was perfectly trimmed, though a bit longer on top, and his beard, probably several days old, was what caught your attention the most, looking just the way you liked it.

But what really captivated you was the bouquet of yellow tulips he was holding, just like he used to bring you for dates or whenever it was a special day for either of you back when you were dating.

You swallowed hard, guilt washing over you as you thought, for a fleeting moment, about him handing you a flower bouquet before you told him you were having his baby.

"Hi..."

You thought your whisper was too soft to be heard, but it was quite the opposite.

Both Seb and Hanna turned to look at each other, then focused on you, still standing in the entryway. Your best friend tensed up slightly, but you tried to reassure her with a slight movement of your hands. The expression on your ex-boyfriend’s face seemed to light up at your small intervention, even if it was minimal.

“Well, Seb, I'll leave you with Y/N. I have a few errands to run…” Your friend tried to excuse herself, though both of you knew it wasn’t true. “See you later for a drink guys!

She winked and quickly slipped out, shutting the door behind her before either of you could even say goodbye.

Now, it was just the two of you, alone.

Seb looked at you again, and you couldn’t help it but get lost in the blue of his eyes. The situation felt strange. You used to cherish every moment of being alone together, but now you didn’t even know how to say a simple "hello."

You once trusted him completely, and now you were unsure whether to offer him a drink or tell him that you have a four-year-old daughter.

“Hi, sunshine,” he said, breaking the silence.

“Hi, Seb.”

He took a step towards you, slowly moving closer. You noticed how his gaze shifted from the flowers to your eyes, as if he was searching for some kind of answer from you. His eyes reflected a mixture of nervousness and tenderness, stirring a whirlwind of emotions inside you.

He didn’t have to say it, you could see it in his eyes. He was afraid of how you’d react to this gesture, this little detail that used to drive you crazy, but now… you didn’t know how to feel about it.

You, on the other hand, were utterly stunned.

How, after all this time and how cold you ended things, could he still do this? How could he still remember?

“These... are for you,” he finally said, his voice low and shaky. He handed you the bouquet, his hands trembling.

You met his gaze, and the way he looked at you was filled with fear, insecurity, and maybe, just maybe, a bit of tenderness. He didn’t need to say it out loud because you knew him too well. He was afraid of how you’d react to this gesture.

“Thank you,” you managed to say, taking your time to smell the flowers.

You couldn’t hold it in. Tears began to blur your vision, and a wave of embarrassment washed over you.

He noticed. Even though you didn’t want to, even though you didn’t feel capable of getting close enough to give him a kiss on the cheek or maybe even a hug, Seb did it anyway.

“It's okay, Y/N,” he whispered. “It’s okay...”

But it wasn’t okay… it was far from okay.

Sebastian Vettel was here, once again, standing in front of you, and possibly back in your life. The boy you once considered your best friend, the best friend you fell in love with, the driver you always supported, and most importantly, the father of your child, was back in your life in such an unexpected way that it still felt surreal.

“I don’t know...” you tried to speak, but the words wouldn’t come out. “It feels surreal that after everything, after such an empty goodbye, here we are, together again,” you confessed. “It’s weird seeing you in front of me in the flesh and not as pixels on a screen.”

“Y/N…”

“I’ve missed you, Seb. So much.”

You knew your honesty didn’t catch him by surprise, because he felt the same way. That’s what hurt the most.

“I missed you too, Y/N. I really did...” he said after a moment, wrapping his arms around you, and you pressed your face against his chest.

“Seb…”

“Don’t overthink it, really,” he interrupted gently. “I’m not here to talk about the past or blame anyone,” he paused, letting out a breath before continuing. “I just want us to go back to who we were before we were together. But, if I’m being honest, we’ve been in love with each other for so long that I can’t remember a time when you weren’t my everything.”

Your lips trembled. The weight of his words was too much for you to handle, at least today, in a first encounter where you haven’t even spent ten minutes together.

You felt awful. You felt shattered inside knowing that if you were in this situation, it was because of you.

“Well, Y/N, tell me…”

“No, no,” you quickly interrupted, grabbing his arm and guiding him to sit on the couch. Immediately after, you rushed to the kitchen to grab the drinks and snacks you spent all morning preparing. “You tell me first. Even though I’ve seen you on TV, I know you’re very private about your life, you know... You never share anything with the media, and well, you don’t even have social media so… How are you?”

He let out a short laugh as he picked up a bottle of water and a cheese-and-salmon toast.

“Well, to be honest, I’m doing much better than when you left me,” he revealed. It didn’t surprise you. After all, it was what you expected him to say. “You must have had your reasons for breaking up with me, and after all these years, I’m not going to ask why you did it. But I won’t lie to you… you left me shattered, Y/N.”

“Seb, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to…”

“I know,” he cut in softly, making a gentle gesture with his hand to calm you down. “Like I said, I’m not looking for an explanation or an apology. I just want you to know how I felt. Mentally… damn, Y/N, you broke me, and I completely lost myself, but at the same time, that’s what gave me the strength to win the championship in 2013,” he looked away from your eyes, shifting his gaze to the wall. Nervously, he started playing with his fingers. “All I could think about was you and that, maybe, there was a chance you were watching...”

“Of course I was, Seb,” you said softly, trying to hold back the tears and keep your composure. “No matter what happened, I never stopped watching or supporting you. I’ve always been, and will always be, your number one fan.”

He nodded, a bittersweet expression crossing his face.

“That year, everything I did was with the thought in mind that you were watching and, somehow, it helped me move forward. But… 2014 was when everything fell apart,” he admitted. “Red Bull wasn’t the same anymore, or at least, I didn’t feel the same way. I wasn’t winning, Daniel was beating me… I felt like I had lost everything, including you and, with time, I started to feel like I had no reason to stay with the team or maybe even in Formula 1. Until Ferrari offered me the contract.”

You remembered it like it was yesterday. Unlike any regular sports fan, you found out through Heike when you were out for a walk with Emily.

“When I was given the chance to sign with Ferrari in 2015... Y/N, really, that’s when I realized it wasn’t the end. That’s what I needed to move forward. I think I mentioned it to you on WhatsApp, but I don’t know if you remember…”

You swallowed hard. Of course, you remembered. He told you just before the news became public, before his mum told you, but you didn’t know how to answer him or if you really should do it. The demons in your head made you think it was a joke, even just an excuse to get closer to you. And you also felt that if he did sign with Ferrari, it would open a door you had closed because you weren’t ready to face the truth.

Just like you were doing now.

“I remember, yes,” you murmured, unable to look him in the eyes.

“When I didn’t get a reply from you I decided not to push it. That’s when I realized you didn’t want anything to do with me. Yet I kept sending you stuff as you might know…”

“That’s not it…” You could barely speak. You were as broken as he was. “I read the message, Seb, but… I burst into tears and didn’t have the strength to reply. I didn’t want to give you false hope when I wasn’t ready to… I didn’t want to hurt you more than I already had,” you confessed. “I knew that if I spoke to you again, I’d hurt you again. And I’d hurt myself too. I couldn’t do that to you, Seb.”

He nodded, looking for some kind of affirmation in your gaze.

“At first, I felt really out of place on the team, you know? And I felt that way for a long time,” he revealed. “It was completely out of my comfort zone, and I felt like I’d never fit in. But little by little, Kimi, Maurizio, and the team made me feel like family. It’s strange to think about it now, but I can’t imagine being with any team other than Ferrari.” You agreed with him, from what you had seen on TV, it was clear he felt that way. “Fighting for the world title with them this year and having a real shot at beating Mercedes… I never thought I’d get to this point.”

You looked at him with a mix of admiration and nostalgia. This was the Seb you knew, the Seb with ambition, who always desired more and more. The Seb who never gave up.

The Seb who didn’t break down, even when he had every reason to.

“I’m so proud of you, Seb. I’ve always been, and I always will be. Don’t forget that.”

“Of course, Y/N,” he looked uncomfortable. Quite a bit, actually. “Well… enough about me. You know I don’t like talking about myself… What about you? What have you been up to all this time? My mom told me a bit, and I’ve seen you a few times, but…”

More than not knowing what to say, you sensed he didn’t want to intrude too much into your life.

You swallowed, trying not to get more nervous than you already were, because now, you supposed, was the moment to tell him about Emily.

“Well, not much has changed, really,” you started, unsure of what to say. “I’ve been in Heppenheim the whole time, except for a couple of trips to Berlin, but nothing unusual,” you tried to smile, but your mind kept circling around the fact that you had to tell him you had a daughter. “I’ve been working at the bar and writing music. To be honest, since we broke up I’ve had a lot more inspiration.”

And since I gave birth to Emily, you thought.

Seb didn’t say anything. You figured he understood. After all, he had thrown himself into his career to cope, while you had poured your emotions into writing songs about the story you shared to cope with grief.

“Now things have changed a bit,” you continued, trying to sound more upbeat to push away the painful memories. “Ever since Red went viral… I swear, I uploaded it without expecting anything, but the reaction…”

“The song is amazing, Y/N. Of course it went viral.”

“I’ve been offered a record deal,” you blurted out. “A few years ago, I met Niall Horan at the bar. You know, the guy who was on that band, One Direction…” Seb nodded, his eyes wide, encouraging you to continue. “He told me he was traveling to find some inspiration for his solo career, and I guess Heppenheim seemed like a good place for him to visit.”

“Wait, wait… a record deal?”

“Apparently, Niall told his label that I was the voice behind Red, and, well… Capital Records offered me a contract,” you explained. “They called me to have a meeting in London, which is why we couldn’t meet up last time…”

His face was calm, unreadable, though his mouth had curved into a big smile. He didn’t seem surprised, and you knew there was a strong chance Hanna had told him everything.

If that was true…

“I hope you accepted, Y/N.”

“Well… actually, I didn’t. I turned it down.”

His smile faded for a moment, and his expression became completely serious.

“You turned it down? Why? Sunshine, this is an opportunity…”

“Yes, I know it’s an amazing opportunity, but I can’t accept it. Not right now.”

You figured this was the moment you should tell him the real reason behind rejecting such a big deal, which included a tour if you sold a certain amount of CDs.

Sebastian kept staring at you, which only made you more nervous. You tried to gather your thoughts, searching for the right way to tell him you had a four-year-old daughter, but you couldn’t find the moment.

You couldn’t just drop it on him now, after all, this was your first real conversation in almost five years.

“Y/N, darling…”

“I can’t take the risk when the only thing I’ve managed is to get one song out of all the ones I sent to the label to go viral,” you half-lied. It was true that you didn’t want to talk about it yet, but you were also insecure about your music. “As much as I’d love to have an album, to fill stadiums and have people singing along to my songs, I can’t take that risk.”

“But, Y/N…”

“I’m not sure all the songs on the album would be successful, Seb.”

“Y/N, you have no idea what you’re going to regret if you let this go....”

“No, Seb, I know exactly what I’m doing, really,” you shook your head, firm in your decision. “This is the best thing for me.”

And for Emily too, though you didn’t say that out loud.

Seb remained silent for longer than you would have liked, as if trying to process what you’d just told him. Then, he stood up, crouching down to your level, and taking your hands in his, he said:

“Alright. If you think your songs aren’t good enough, sing one of them to me.”

“What?” you asked, confused.

“If you turned down the record deal because you think your songs aren’t good enough for the world to hear, sing one of them to me.”

His tone, though calm, was direct and insistent.

“Seb… I can’t. I’m too embarrassed,” you laughed nervously.

“Come on, Y/N,” he said, gently rubbing your hands with his thumbs, just like he always did when your anxiety was at its worst. “It’s just me. I’m still the same after all these years.”

You sighed, knowing he wasn’t going to let it go until you gave in. It was Seb, and he always got what he wanted from you, even when you didn’t want to. In the end, you gave in, carefully standing up from the couch and heading towards the piano at the back of the room, gesturing for him to follow you.

You carefully slided the bench back, lifting the lid as you sat down. You positioned your hands, starting to play the first few chords to warm up, ensuring your memory flawlessly recalled the piece.

“This is song number 5, like your driver number... It's called loml.”

You continued playing, finally giving way to the song.

Who's gonna stop us from waltzing Back into rekindled flames? If we know the steps anyway We embroidered the memories Of the time I was away Stitching, ‘We were just kids, babe.’ I said, ‘I don't mind, it takes time.’ I thought I was better safe than starry-eyed I felt aglow like this Never before and never since.

Your voice shook as you began to sing, but you kept going, holding on to what your ex-boyfriend had told you about how he knew it was about him. As you settled into the song, you started feeling more comfortable, just like you did when you used to sing for Seb. Though you couldn’t look at him because you were absorbed in the key, your fingers delicately moving over it, you could feel his eyes on you.

You shit-talked me under the table Talking rings and talking cradles I wish I could un-recall How we almost had it all Dancing phantoms on the terrace Are they second-hand embarrassed That I can't get out of bed? Cause something counterfeit's dead.

Tears started falling from your eyes as you approached the final part of the song. Memories of your shared history flashed through your mind like a movie. Your vision was completely blurred, and you felt a tightness in your chest that was overwhelming, making it hard to breathe, almost impossible to keep singing. Somehow, though, you fought to hold it together, just as you did the day you said goodbye to the man now sitting beside you.

Oh, what a valiant roar What a bland goodbye The coward claimed he was a lion I'm combing through the braids of lies ‘I’ll never leave’... ‘Never mind.’ Our field of dreams, engulfed in fire Your arson matches your somber eyes And I'll still see it until I die You're the loss of my life.

Silence filled the room as you played the final notes. With your hands still resting on the keyboard, you looked at Seb. Once again, you didn’t know what to say to him, and you knew he didn't either. He was motionless, running a hand through his hair, probably trying to process what he just heard.

Y/Ni, this song... it’s about us, isn’t it?”

“It might be,” you admited, unable to lie to him, at least not about this.

He sighed. You could tell he was affected; you knew it the moment his tears began to form, just as yours continued to flow.

“You should rethink the contract,” he said firmly. “This song deserves to be heard by more than just me, your parents, and Hanna.”

“I can’t, Seb. I just can’t…”

“Can I sit next to you?”

You looked up and saw him gesturing to the bench. Confused, not sure what to do or say, you shifted a little, making space, and he sat beside you. Seb didn’t hesitate to wrap an arm around you, offering a comfort that felt wonderful but also caused you to crumble a bit more inside.

You surprised yourself by resting your head on his shoulder.

“Why are you so determined to convince yourself you don’t deserve this opportunity?” His tone was soft, just like the way he stroked your hair. “Do you really think you're not good enough to be a successful singer?”

“It’s not about being good enough, it’s that I’m not,” you whisper,ed your throat tightening. “I’m not a good person, Seb, and it’s only a matter of time before I screw up again and hurt someone, just like I hurt you.”

“Does this… have something to do with the second date in your YouTube channel username?”

You stood your head up, staring at him in confusion while trying not to panic.

“What are you talking about?”

“Your username,” he repeated, moving closer. “I figured out that the numbers represent two dates. I know for sure that one of them is June 15, 2006, the day we started dating, but the other one… I don’t know what January 12, 2014 means for you because we weren’t talking by then, but it must be important. And based on what you just said…”

Your eyes widened in shock. You were paralyzed, not knowing how to react.

How could he have noticed something so… insignificant? How had he connected the dots and figured out the dates you had in mind when you created that account?

You thought this would be the perfect moment to tell him that the second date marks the birth of your daughter, the daughter you had together; that on that day, while you were in labor, he was at the hospital waiting for some exams results and he was talking to your dad, who couldn’t contain his excitement about his granddaughter’s arrival and had to keep it a secret from him.

But you couldn’t. Not yet. You need to regain his trust first. You and Seb needed to rebuild the kind of relationship you had before you became the love of each other’s lives.

“Seb…” you trailed off, unable to continue. “I swear, on everything that matters to you, I’ll tell you, but right now… I just can’t.”

He looked at you for a few seconds that felt like an eternity. You knew him better than you knew yourself, and you knew he was persistent, that he needed an answer, but you also knew he was respectful and wouldn't push you.

“That’s okay,” he said finally, a bit resigned. “I understand, it’s fine. I’m not asking you to tell me now if you’re not ready, but I want you to know that when you are, I’ll be here to listen.”

You looked at him, grateful, and nodded without saying anything else.

You both sat at the piano bench for a while, in silence, listening only to the sound of your breathing and the melody of the song replaying in your mind, as intrusive thoughts overwhelmed you.

“If I waited almost 19 years of my life to be your boyfriend, I can wait a little longer, it doesn’t matter the time you need, for you to tell me,” Seb finally spoke, and his words broke you a little more than you already were. “Let’s be friends again, what do you think?” he offered, giving you a small smile. “Let’s take things slowly, like maybe we should have done when we first started dating. You know…”

“Slowly, no problem,” you repeated, smiling back at him.

You felt a weight lift from your shoulders at his words. Maybe you were not at the peak of your relationship, and maybe you’d never got back there, but at least you were working together to turn your story into something new.

“You know what, Y/N? I’ve always felt like our story wasn’t over. I don’t just mean that romantically, but in a broader sense,” he said quickly. “We have a whole lot of history, and now is when we’re going to start writing our second book.”

“I know, Seb. I’ve been thinking the same thing ever since I said goodbye to you,” you confess. “That day, goodbyes were bittersweet, but I knew it wasn’t the end and that I’d see you again.”

Before the year ends. I’m telling Seb Emily is her daughter before December 31st.

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asterias-record-shop · 10 months ago

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you belong to me (c.s)

**warning, themes of owning and claiming people (more so emotionally but y’know), slight dubcon and cnc, saying no without really meaning it, toxic relationship, dark dark DARK fic

Coriolanus learned in life that he liked to own things. People. He didn't like to be owned, he liked to own others.

When him and Tigris fell on hard times, there wasn't really much he could do besides fake the fact that their family still had some sort of wealth. He had just gotten chosen to take Lucy as his mentee, and he despised the fact that he had gotten such a... throw away tribute.

Until she did that little stunt that got him all of the attention — yours included.

“Now Coryo,” you cooed as you came behind him, your hands slowly clasping his shoulders as you leaned down. “You are aware that you are still mine tonight, right?”

Coriolanus swallowed. He didn’t like to be told what to do, but with you, he had to. And he didn’t complain as much as he felt like he should when the orders came from you.

He felt his jaw clench, ticking as you leaned down, whispering in his ear. “I better not see her hands on you tonight,” your voice makes him shiver, and he hated that. “If I do… you should worry very much about your fate.”

He wasn’t sure why your threat on his life didn’t bother him. He knew that you would definitely follow up with that threat.

“Y/N,” your name was like honey on his tongue, addictive but too sweet. Like him, you liked to own people, whether they knew it or not, and he knew that you owned him. He hated that. “I want… I want-”

“Want to what?” Your hand gripped tighter on his shoulder, the Academy Rogue red making him shiver. He hated the effect you had on him. “You belong to me, Coriolanus. No matter how much you fucking hate it.”

“Stop.” He growled out, eyes darting around the library. What would Highbottom think of the daughter of one of the most prominent family’s in the Capitol being on him? “Stop it.”

“And if I don’t want to?” Your hand slowly clasped around his throat, inching up to hold his jaw and push his head back to look up at you. “You’re weak, Coriolanus,” your thumb trailed his lips, humming as you tilted your head down at him. “You wish I couldn’t tell how much you want me.”

That made him swallow, trying to look anywhere but you before your fingers slapped against his cheek.

“Look at me.”

Quickly, his blue eyes snapped to yours, Adam’s apple bobbing. He hated that you could read him so easily. You were just as twisted as he was, and he hated it just as much as he was infatuated with your twist of insanity.

You leaned down, lips pressing firmly to his. You tasted so fucking perfect, something he could only describe as pure addiction.

He knew better than to kiss back, holding back a moan as you slowly pulled his chin, forcing him to open his mouth so you could dip your tongue in.

“Kiss me back,” your voice was breathy as the hand in his hair pushed down his neck and shoulder, beginning to unbutton his light blue dress shirt before your teeth grazed his lips. “Fucking kiss me back.”

He didn’t have to be told twice. He leaned up to chase your lips, letting out a soft groan as your teeth graze his lips. It felt stupid to be at someone’s mercy with just one touch, and normally he was the one doing the touching and another being at his mercy, but not with you.

“Look at you, finally understanding how to listen,” your voice turns into a coo as you pulled away, his lips still parted as though he was waiting for you to kiss him again. “You’re so pretty, Coriolanus…”

He swallowed as you pulled your hands off his body, humming. “I’ll see you soon.”

“Y/N,” he cleared his throat as you started to walk away, your tight skirt catching his eye before you turned around. “Is there something… specific you want?”

You hummed softly, your head tilting to the side slightly in thought.

He felt his fists clench. There was so much he wanted to do, so much he wanted to do to you. He could own thousands and all of them combined wouldn’t amount to the pleasure of owning you, the crown of District 1.

“Nothing I can think of,” you hummed, but then you smiled. “Surprise me.”

Coriolanus hated how big your house was. It was almost just as big as the academy, and that got on his damn nerves.

“Coryo…” his name coming from your mouth sounded like a siren song as you sat behind him on your bed, cooing in his ear. “What are you thinking about?”

He couldn’t lie. “How big your house is.”

His words make you laugh. “And why are you thinking about that when your thoughts should be me?”

“They are.”

His thoughts were always about you. How he wanted to claim and own you more than anything in the world, how he wanted to take everything from you and give it all back from his hand. He wanted to claim you, he needed to have you.

“They don’t sound like they are,” your teeth grazed his earlobe, kissing down the side of his neck with a soft groan. “What are you thinking about?”

He couldn’t lie to you. “How big your house is.”

You couldn’t help but laugh. “You miss it, don’t you?” He didn’t know what you meant until you grabbed his chin, forcing him to look up at you. “Your wealth.”

He did miss it, he really did. He knew, though, that he’d have yours soon enough. He didn’t even need to kill you for it, not that he wanted to.

“Yes.”

“Good,” you breathed against his lips, tongue trailing his lips before you pulled away. “I can give you wealth, Coryo.”

“I don’t want wealth,” he did, but he wanted what came with it. You knew what he wanted. “You know I don’t want wealth, Y/N.”

A soft hum escapes your mouth as you softly stroked his face, tilting his head slightly. “What do you want then? I want to hear you say it.”

“You.”

He didn’t say what he wanted of you though. He wanted to own you, every single part of you. He wanted to take everything away from you and give it to you from his own hand, to own you like you owned him now. He wanted you.

“You forget that you belong to me, Coriolanus,” you hummed into his ear, rubbing his shoulders softly. “Not the other way around.”

He did know he belonged to you and he hated that he loved it. He hated that he loved the fact that you owned him — body, mind, and soul.

He just wanted to own you instead.

“I’m okay with belonging to you,” he whispered, swallowing before groaning into your mouth once you kissed him. “Just as long… as I’m the only one that you touch like this.”

He wanted to be the only one you touched like this, but he wanted to be the only one who touched you more. He wanted to be the only one touching you, kissing you, fucking you, cumming inside of you, claiming you.

“Coriolanus,” you cooed as you brushed your mouth against his, your hands slowly pushing from his shoulders down his chest, slowly slipping off his blazer. “Why would it matter if you’re the only one?”

“Because I don’t want anyone else to have you,” his vivid is rough as he chased your lips, a soft groan leaving his mouth as you started unbuttoning his shirt. “I don’t want… I want you. Only you. I only want to have you.”

He hated how vulnerable you made him, but he loved it just as much.

“You’re so selfish, Coryo,” but your fingers pushing against his toned abdominal muscles made him swallow. “I think I know what I want tonight.”

There was many things you could have wanted to do.

“What?”

“I want to start working on our future lineage,” you whisper against his lips, pushing your hands up into his hair and softly scratching his scalp before you tugged his head back by his hair. “I’m going to bring your name back into its rightful place in society,” you kissed his lips again, humming. “And I’m going to show everyone how fucking powerful we will be. And how I own Coriolanus fucking Snow.”

He doesn’t protest to your words, no matter how much he wanted to fight back against you. He was thankful for the fact that you were going to bring you back into his formal place in life, and he would get everything he ever wanted — your estate, your wealth, your power.

He didn’t even have to kill you for it.

Nothing amounted to what he really wanted though — which was you. This would tie him to you forever, and that was what he truly wanted.

That’s why he didn’t protest as you started unbuttoning his undershirt.

That’s why he didn’t protest when your hands pushed down to his slacks, unbuttoning them and unzipping them, his hands even joining yours as you kissed against his neck.

That’s why he didn’t protest when your fingers trailed over the grooves on his strong abdomen, tracing his abs.

“I would be honored.”

Coriolanus enjoyed the sight of you riding him very much. He enjoyed the feeling even more, your perfect, plush walls clamping down on his cock as you rocked your hips into his.

Your head was thrown back, whines and moans escaping your lips as he kept his hands steady on your plush hips. “Fuck,” he cursed, unable to keep his eyes off of you as your hands on his chest kept you steady as you finally looked down at him. “You can go harder, you know.”

When your nails dug into his chest, he didn’t even know he said something wrong. He couldn’t control the slight gasp from his lips as he exhaled shakily, your hips starting to move faster and rougher.

“Don’t tell me what I already know,” you gritted out between your clenched teeth, holding back loud moans to save yourself some sort of dignity. Everyone would know very soon Coriolanus Snow belonged to you and he was the man who had his cock in your oh so desired pussy ever single night, but you wanted to save that until you announced you were pregnant with his child. “Coriolanus…”

When you finally moaned his name, he knew you were close and he would have to cum with you. He had been holding back ever since you started your rougher movements, his stomach visibly clenching as his chest rose up and down quickly to match his breaths.

You had been trying for a long time to get pregnant with his child, ever since your parents instilled in you that you were their last legacy and you needed to ensure that you had something to leave everything behind to if anything ever happened. For most of the time that Coriolanus was able to have sex with you since you claimed him as yours, publicly in the Academy’s library long before you kissed him by forcing him to eat you out while you studied — something he truly didn’t protest to — you took preventative measures, but not anymore.

You were ready this time, and he was more than happy to give you something that would make you his forever.

“Cum,” he groaned, his dominant mindset threatening to push through his forced submission act. You liked being in control, and if he didn’t listen, he knew he wouldn’t be able to feel you for a month. He couldn’t go that long, as it could’ve been his sixth punishment that sent him over the edge to finally take you as his own. Every punishment made the state of celibacy longer, and he had gotten so addicted to feeling your cunt around his cock that he couldn’t bear getting another punishment. The sooner you came, the sooner he was able to take control. “Please cum.”

Your hand moving from his chest to his throat made him groan, a slight pressure from your thumbs pressing against his windpipe as you got rougher in your thrusts. You were finally letting out all of your whines and moans he loved so much, chasing a high only he could give you.

“Don’t fucking try to take control!” Your other hand pushed into his hair, giving a sharp tug as you forced his head back, the pressure of your thumb preventing him from moaning. “You belong to me. I own you!”

He couldn’t stop himself, his hips snapping up into you and making your eyes roll back, hitting that spot that made you gush all over his cock. He knew your vision had gone white and you were in that state of pure bliss and orgasmic pleasure that he could finally take control like he wanted to.

Coriolanus was quick to force you onto your back, pulling your legs over his shoulders as your hands tried to hold onto something, anything.

“No, no!” You sounded like a spoiled brat who didn’t get her way, and in a way, you were. You weren’t in control anymore. “Stop it, stop it! You listen to me!”

“Shut the fuck up,” Coriolanus growled as he leaned down, pressing his lips to yours. You squealed and tried to push him off, trying to take control again and even biting his lip. He groaned as you dug your teeth into his pale pink appendages, drawing blood so that when he pulled back, your mouth was stained red.

Oh but did he laugh, driving his hips forward so much so that you were pushed into a new position; your ankles crossed and forced over his left shoulder as he drove his hips so far against you that your ass was lifted off the bed.

“You fucking bastard-!” You spit out red stained saliva, saliva stained with his blood until his thumb gathered said saliva and forced it back into your mouth. You choked as he did that, teeth gracing his finger before he pushed the pad of his thumb back into your throat.

The action had you choking and gagging as his thrusts got rougher, the feeling of your walls fluttering and clamping down on his cock threatening to make him go crazy. He was so close, so so close.

“Spoiled brats need to learn their place,” he growled out, thrusting roughly with each thrust as he tilted his head back, savoring the feeling of your plush walls on the shaft of his cock and your hot, wet mouth around his thumb absolute bliss. “And who they fucking belong to.”

He pulled his thumb from your mouth, focusing on his thrusts as you squirmed and whined beneath him, letting out soft coughs between your moans as you swallowed. “Fine. You can have control this once.”

‘This once’. He knew by the time he was finished you’d be begging for more.

He groaned as he pushed his hips forward, scooting further up the bed and watching you squirm, a loud scream coming from your lips. He wasn’t even thrusting anymore, merely rolling his hips as he was balls deep inside of you. Each roll of his hips still pushed him into new places you’ve never felt, building the height of another orgasm at this new angle as you clawed at the sheets.

Your expensive bed started to creak at his thrusts, headboard slamming into the wall as tears welled in your eyes from the amount of pleasure he was giving you. “C-Coriolanus!”

“Say it,” he growled out the order as his hand moved to hold your throat just like you held his earlier, his other hand hoisting your legs farther up his chest which made you scream out. “Fucking say it.”

His hips moved rougher and faster as you sobbed, whining. “Say what?! What do you want me to say, I want to cum, I want to cum!”

He stopped his thrusts, something he barely managed to do without cumming himself. The stopping of his thrusts made you sob harder, trying to force your hips into his, but it wasn’t the same. You slapped your hands against his chest, tears streaming down your cheeks as his hand moved from your throat to your cheek, delicately wiping your tears.

“Fucking move!” You sobbed, whining as you continued to squirm.

“Say you belong to me.”

His words made to gasp. Your face was so outright shocked and offended, mouth agape and eyes wide as you stared at him, tears still pricking your eyes.

“Say you belong to me,” his hand moved back down your throat, putting pressure on your windpipe making you choke as he leaned down. Your legs being pushed farther down to your chest made you whine, but the slight spark of pain did nothing but make you want to cum more. “Or I swear you won’t cum ever again.”

Another sob racked your body, but your tears wouldn’t work on him. He knew you.

“Please Coriolanus, please!” You continued to sob, but his hand only tightened until you choked, sniffling as you rolled your eyes. “Fucking bastard.”

He knew those tears were fake.

“I belong to you,” you choked out, spitting the words as though they were a curse as you glared up at him. “I belong to fucking Coriolanus Snow.”

A sharp thrust of his hips was all it took for you to come undone, a true son of pleasure leaving your mouth as you came, but he still didn’t stop his thrusts. He pulled so far out of you that you felt empty, unable to even ride out your orgasmic high in pleasure before he slammed right back in. You felt your eyes roll back into your head, mouth still wide and agape but this time in pleasure as he continued to choke you, gasping for air.

“You belong to me,” he growled out, continuing to fuck and use you until he was on the verge of his first climax. “I am going to fucking get you pregnant.. I’m going to take everything away from you just to give it all back from my fucking hand. You will belong to me — mind, body, and soul — until your heart stops beating.”

He leaned down as you continued to sob, the feeling of being folded likw a whore not foreign but still ever the less slightly painful. “Your mind will learn that you can only depend on me,” he gave a sharp thrust, almost to solidify his statement, a snap of wood slightly knocking you out of your senses to alert you he broke your bed. “Your body will be turned on with just one graze of my touch,” another sharp thrust and a creak of the bed made you moan, because that was all you could do. “Your soul is mine. Tied to my own for the rest of eternity. Do you understand?”

You nodded mindlessly as he smirked, pulling your legs from his shoulders to wrap around his waist as he continued to roll his hips, moaning into your ear as he came a spurted hot, thick ropes of cum into your womb.

This was what you wanted, right? It had to be.

You felt your arms wrap around his back, moaning at ever lazy thrust as he pushed his hands down your body to feel your stomach. “You better get used to this, because there won’t be a day in our lives where I won’t fill you with cum. I don’t care if you’re pregnant or you’re nursing or whatever the fuck you’re doing. I will fill you with cum every single fucking day and you’re going to love every second of it.”

He watched you nod, your eyes hazy as you stared up at him, a slight laugh coming from his lips. This was the first step of getting you to depend on him mentally, and he loved it.

“I don’t care what you’re doing,” his thrusts get more steady, building back up the strength as your bed began to creak louder, but the sound didn’t even register in your brain anymore. Your eyes never left his. “I will be fucking you every single second. I’ll dump every fucking load into you, into every single one of your fuckable holes, and you’ll be my personal little cocksleeve that’s so fucking cockdumb and such a fucking whore that you’ll be begging and waiting for me. Right?”

“Yes,” you groaned, your hips starting to roll into his. “Yes!”

“Say it again,” he cooed softly, taunting you. You were finally his and he loved it. “Say you’re mine again. Like you mean it.”

“I belong to you,” you moaned out, nodding as he continued to thrust into you. “I belong to you!”

He laughed. “There you go darling… you belong to me.”

Oh you loved it.

I do not ever give consent to my work being published on other platforms or being translated at any point, even if it is a request. If my work is on any other platform, it’s without my permission. Your media consumption is not my responsiblity.

#c.s. ˚ ༘✶ ⋆｡˚ ⁀➷ asteria’s version #the hunger games #a ballad of songbirds and snakes #coriolanus snow #coriolanus x reader #coriolanus x you #coriolanus smut #coriolanus fanfiction #coriolanus imagine #coriolanus x fem! reader #coriolanus x reader smut #coriolanus snow x reader #coriolanus snow x you #coriolanus snow x female!reader #coriolanus snow x fem!reader #coriolanus snow x fem!reader smut #a ballad of songbirds and snakes fanfic

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chaussetteblanche · 1 year ago

Note

I had this idea in my head for a while; With Kit Connor x gf reader, where she comforts him when he was pressured to come out

thank you <3

pairing : kit connor x reader summary : you are by kit's side as he deals with being forced to come out word count : 900 words warnings : swearing

note : the fact that some so-called "fans" watched the show and had the nerve of accusing him of queer-baiting and pressured into coming out when he was only eighteen is just disgusting to me, check yourselves y'all

You'd been dating Connor for a while. Being an actor, you'd met at some party he had attended with the Heartstopper cast. You'd met Yasmin first, and had immediately hit it off. She was unbelievably funny and down-to-earth. She had introduced you to the rest of the cast, and, naturally, you'd been drawn to Kit. You had exchanged numbers through shy smiles and shaky hands, the rest was history.

Dating someone in the acting world was both a blessing and a curse. As an actor, Kit understood and could relate to your struggles with roles, management, fame, social media... just the industry in general. You bonded over similar experiences as bisexuals who could pass as straight and who didn't always bother with labels or clarifying their sexualities. But as an actor, he was also often on the move, filming thousands of kilometres away from you or in a different time zone altogether.

But even with all this, being with Kit was easy. You both clicked, you just worked. You communicated your feelings and needs and even though you'd had your fair share of arguments, you loved him more than anything. He made you and your life so much better.

So you can imagine that when people he started being accused of queer-baiting and being pressured by people who missed the meaning of the show entirely to come out, you didn't take it well. You loved Kit with all your heart and would tear the world to pieces just for him.

"I just can't believe these people! How dare they? How can they just- sit there and demand this of you!" you'd ranted one night. "You're eighteen for Pete's sake! You don't owe them or anyone anything! Fucking cunts, it's just ridiculous that they think so!" Kit watched you from where he was sitting on the couch, running a hand over his face. You sigh, licking your lips as you trudged over to him. "I'm sorry," you speak softly, standing in between his legs. He looks up at you, shaking his head. "You've got nothin' for apologize for, luv," "But I shouldn't go off like this, it's not fair to you, this negative energy..."

He pulls you into his lap, wrapping his arms around you and burying his face in your neck. Your hand immediately goes to his hair, gently scratching his scalp as the other wounds itself around his shoulders. "I would make them vanish off the face of the Earth if I could, I swear, I-" "You did all you could, my love, it's already more than enough." He meant the countless posts you'd made concerning his situation as well as other actors', speaking up on the issue in many interviews... He was right, you'd done everything in your power. But it still wasn't enough. And it was killing you.

"But it's not, though. They just won't stop! Where is their bloody decency? And you don't deserve this, any of this. It's so unfair." "I know," He lifted his head up to look at you. Your hand cupped his jaw before you kissed him deeply. "I can take it," he assured against your lips. You pulled away, frowning. "But you shouldn't have to. It's so unfair. I wish we could just shut them all up, tell them to fuck off." "But you've done that already, haven't you?" he chuckled. "Yes, but clearly the message didn't get through." He pressed a sweet kiss to your lips. "Stop worrying about me. I'll take care of it." "What will you do?" "I don't know yet, but I'll figure it out."You'd seen the tweet before you'd seen him. He was supposed to come over to your place for Halloween, you were planning on attending a party together, dressed as Shaggy and Velma. You were halfway through getting ready. You had your outfit on and were just getting started on your makeup when your phone started blowing up. Confused, you picked it up, seeing Kit's tweet everywhere. You slapped a hand over your mouth, scrolling down Twitter. Even though you were furious at the people who had brought him to this, you couldn't help but feel proud of him for taking control of the situation and coming out on "his own terms", if they could be qualified as such.

Your doorbell rings and you all but run to open the door. Outside stands Kit, looking absolutely beaten. You bite your lip, eyebrows furrowing. "I just saw," you breathe. He walks in and pulls you into a big hug, sighing shakily into your hair. You rub his back. "Oh, baby," you coo, "I'm so sorry, you don't deserve any of this,"

You usher him to your couch, closing the door and start making some tea. You set both your cups down on the coffee table, sitting down next to him. You take his hands in yours, caressing his knuckles. "How do you feel?" "I- I'm just disappointed, I guess. I thought people, especially after watching the show, would be more understanding, empathetic... just- more human, I guess." "Yeah, people are disappointing." "But I wanted to be the one to say you, you know? I didn't want that taken away from me, I didn't want to be outed." "And you were totally right, you took control of the situation and I'm so proud of you. You changed the narrative." He gave you a small smile.

Kit laid his face in your lap, hugging your thighs. "It still sucks, though," he spoke, voice muffled. You nodded, running a comforting hand up and down his back. "Yeah, it sucks. Do you wanna stay here tonight and watch some scary movies?" "Yes, please."

#kit connor x reader #kit connor #kit connor x you

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brandogenius · 9 months ago

Text

i hope you all forgive me for the inactivity the last few days!! i’ve been writing this and a few others but dedicating more time to this!

it’s one of the longest pieces i’ve written so far! lemme know if you enjoyed this :D

‼️RPF‼️

"first day of tour"

the boys & younger!artist reader!

(not proofread!!)

Part 1 here!

word count: 6,591.

7:05am.

your phone shined back at you. 7:06am. the sound of someone’s phone alarm rang throughout the bunk. the sound of the bus tires rolling over stones and pebbles made you quickly remember where you are.

you sighed, rolling over so you were facing the small curtain. your ears twitched to the small sound of shuffling coming from one of the bunks. the alarm was turned off. you could hear the sound of ruffling, curtains being pulled and feet pattering against the wood on the ground. the shower was turned on and off.

it went in and out like a blur for you. in and out of sleep. it kinda made you feel anxious. you were normally someone who liked to sleep in late. two days ago you were sleeping in late while recovering from the cold you got from somewhere. the boys being kind enough to let you sleep in until afternoon claiming “you need rest to restore your energy before tour” being up early before the sun even started to rise made you a little worried.

it was more for the thought of having to adapt to this new lifestyle for the couple months you share with the band you’re opening for. waking up, getting breakfast and preparing for a jam packed filled day of soundcheck, preparing for the show and actually doing the show.

you let your mind ramble for a couple moments. physically you’re on a tour bus in a new city, ready to sing in front of thousands of people. but mentally, you’re in your bedroom, trying to come up with ways to skip class. to not show up to school. to turn off your alarm and roll over, getting those couple extra hours of sleep. thankful you don’t need to face the people who make your life a living hell.

unfortunately this isn’t the case. you cannot afford to let your anxious mind ramble and convince yourself to stay off school. you have a job, an important job to do. an exciting new adventure - a new era to unlock. this was going to be fun, it was going to be-

“good morning” a soft knock to the side of your bunk startled you from your thoughts. a familiar soft voice rung through the room.

you stayed quiet for a moment before you heard your name being called. you bummed out, fingers pulling back the curtain. there stood in front of you was lucy. she was still

dressed in her pyjamas. she leaned down slightly, phone in her hand.

“it’s time to wake up, kid. i got you up a little bit earlier than the boys so you have time to prepare. we should be stopping at the venue in an hour. giving you time to have first dibs in the shower. i’ll be making some cereal if you want any” lucy smiled down at you. she looked tired.

“thanks” you sighed, flopping your head back down on the pillow.

“trust me, you’ll get used to the early mornings. did you sleep well?” lucy turned her back to you, her voice was low, whispering almost as to not wake up the other two. her bunk was directly across from yours. she started to fix the blankets, folding them neatly

“you could say that” you pushed the duvet off you, feet hitting the cold ground. “better than when i was sick so i guess you could say it was good”

“well that’s good. knew you’d be better before the first show. alright, you go have a shower, i’ll prepare some coffee and wake up the other two” lucy gave you a small smile, walking out of the bunk room, closing the door quietly. you stood in the middle of the room. the only sounds that could be heard was the small sounds of snores from the other two and the small faint sound of the coffee machine behind used.

making your way to the door, you slide it slowly, eager to not make a sound. the bathroom was pretty big. nothing too special. a toilet with a sink and a shower. you spent about 20 minutes in the shower, trying to fully wake up. the warm water feeling like a warm safe blanket around you. it helped your anxiety a bit.

what made you anxious you didn’t know. maybe it was the anxiety of getting up early. the feeling and memories of highschool filling your brain. the same routine of getting up, showing, eating and leaving. except, this time it was different.

your thoughts were yet again, interrupted by a knock on the door.

“spare some hot water for the poor unfortunate souls” you quickly turned off the shower, drying yourself off.

“sorry- i’ll be out in a second!” you called back. the voice behind the door chuckled.

“i’m just joking, take your time- actually don’t - i need to use the bathroom” phoebes voice rang through the room. you quickly got dressed into a hoodie and sweatpants. something cosy to last throughout soundcheck

you opened the door to the bathroom phoebe was standing against the wall, phone and towel in her hand.

“no need to rush- jesus christ it’s all ok” she reassured you.

“i know, just didn’t wanna keep you waiting” you called back, sliding the door open to the bunk room. you made your way to your bunk, grabbing your phone and heading out into the open area lounge.

julien took her spot on the couch, phone on the table propped up on a book as it played some random youtube video. lucy was stirring some sugar into a cup.

“mornin’. did phoebe scare you?” julien greeted you. lucy placed two cups of coffee on the table, placing a third cup for herself across from you.

“someday i will put salt in her coffee. call it payback for the amount of times she does that” lucy added, taking a sip from her mug.

“she does that often?” you questioned, hands wrapped around the mug. the stinging sensation of the hot coffee was grounding you slightly.

“all the time, kid. would start banging on the door like a crazy person to scare us. consider yourself lucky she didn’t start screaming like the banshee” julien joked lightheartedly. you pulled your legs onto the couch, eyes defying to the video julien was watching.

“we got a jam packed day ahead of us. first show of the tour, excited?” lucy asked you. of course you were excited. you were just nervous.

you nodded your head, taking a sip of the coffee. it wasn’t something you usually prefer. you were more of an iced coffee person but you wouldn’t complain. lucy went out of her way to make coffee for you. the least you can do is drink it.

“did you make coffee” all heads turn to the silver haired woman who made her way to the couch. “it’s ok the counter”

“sweet” phoebe took the mug, sitting in julien’s place, the tattooed girl getting up to go use the shower.

“ say, if everything goes to plan. quick soundcheck then we can go get some lunch after. sound good?” phoebe proposed the idea.

“i like it” you replied with a smile. it’d be nice to go out and have lunch with the boys. considering the fact you weren’t able to join them two days ago, it’d be nice to have some food with them.

“hell yeah. i was researching some places in the city. there’s a nice little cafe not too far from the venue. i can pull up the website, see if they have a kids menu” phoebe teased. lucy giggled into her mug, watching the way you stared at phoebe

“that was just mean. i hope you get a senior citizen discount” lucy snorts into her coffee mug, letting out a loud laugh. phoebe gasped, her hand holding her heart in mock offence.

“i may have silver hair, but that was just too far man. not cool” phoebe pretended to wipe fake tears from her eyes. lucy reached her hand out for a high five. “that made my morning - no, my entire week. you bet i’m going to share this story during the show”

“you better not” phoebe flipped lucy off.

“i don’t know what’s goin’ on, but i agree with lucy” juliens voice popped up, coming out of the shower and sitting on the edge of the seat beside you.

“they just called me old!” phoebe pointed a finger at you. you shrugged in return, sipping on your coffee. “did i lie?”

“i agree. you’re also older than all of us here so.. they aren’t wrong” julien smirked over at

phoebe.

“oh fuck you guys”

you heard the bus stop, glancing around as the boys, they seemed to know what’s up.

“seems like we’re at the venue. right, let’s go” lucy took the mugs, settling them into the sink. the small bit of anxiety started to creep back into your chest again. the mixture of excitement and worry weighing the pros and cons down.

8:20am

you checked your phone. time went by quicker than you thought. you got up from your seat and followed julien to the door. she was already outside. the cold crisp air hit your face making you shiver a bit. the sun has risen. the sun shining down on top of your head making you squint. it was a nice feeling. the birds were chirping loudly all around you.

the bus was parked in the venue bus park. thankfully there was nobody queuing up around here. you and the boys would be able to get in and out without any hassle.

it was a bit familiar to you. growing up, you were someone who enjoyed going to concerts. queuing up hours on end to see your favourite bands. being in the position of the musicians you loved when you were younger was weird.

“you alright?” julien stood in front of you, lifting her guitar out of the storage unit. she started to take out most of the equipment, settling them onto the floor.

“i’m good- haven’t seen the outside in a while” you shook your head, taking your guitar case from julien and settling it beside the bus. you helped take out some boxes and suitcases, leading them over to the venue doors.

“ you would’ve been out with us if you weren’t sick, kid. thankfully if all goes well, we can go out for lunch so that’s good” julien was right beside you, arms full with baggage. the two of you walked through the open doors and down the hallway. staff members belonging to the venue were quick

to help. taking the boxes and equipment from your hands and guide you to the dressing room.

you and julien make your way into the big room. snacks and drinks were displayed out for you all. you opted to sit on the couch, calming the inner turmoil wrecking through your head.

“can head those thoughts a mile away” you looked up to see julien staring at you. “first soundcheck. im nervous - what if it doesn’t go right?”

“hey-“ julien put down the snacks and walked over to you, crouching down to meet your eyes. “i think you’ll do great. don’t put yourself down like that, kid. alright? you’re a talented musician. i think you’ll ace this” she reassured. you tried to believe her words.

“i just.. worry. constant state of anxiety. first night of the tour and i want it to go good..” you trailed off, shrugging slightly. you stare at the ground.

“i understand, really.” juliens voice was soft. she placed a band on your shoulder, sitting down beside you. “the first night is always scary. trust me when i tell you it gets easier from then onwards. when you develop this routine of waking up, soundcheck, preforming they same songs every night, it gets easier and more familiar. it’ll come to you naturally”

you listened to the older woman talk. she had a way with words. the way she was able to intelligently put her words together like a poem amazed you.

“thanks” you leaned your head back on the couch with a sigh. julien patted your thigh as she stood up. “i’ll go find the boys, you alright on your own? i think i habe soundcheck now so if you wanna come check it out? you’ll be on after us anyway”

you took the invitation, following julien out to meet with the rest of the band. lucy and phoebe were on the stand, crew members standing all around them. phoebe seemed to notice the two of you first.

“where the hell did you guys go?”

“we ended up being shown to the dressing room. they are staying to watch soundcheck” julien walks out on stage, pointing a finger back at you.

you watched as the crew worked quickly to mic the boys up. placing the wires carefully on their backs and handing them the in ears. it was all new to you. a couple of years ago, you’d be outside queuing in line to see your favourite band while they did soundcheck. this is what happens during it huh?

it was interesting. witnessing the boys play around with songs on the setlist and ones that didn’t make the setlist. running about and tuning their guitars. redoing the intros if they didn’t get it right. the behind the scenes of it all intrigued you a lot. it was something you never got to see much in general. being able to watch what happens when getting ready for a show was fun.

“kid, you’re up next”

“huh?” you glanced over at phoebe. she skips over to you, in ears in hand. “have you done these before?” she passed them to you. you looked at them in your hand for a moment.

“no.”

“that’s fine” phoebe took back the in ears, setting up the monitors, clipping them to the back of your hoodie. “i’ve done it so many times i can do it with my eyes closed. if you ever need help just scream and i’ll be summoned” she reassured.

“i’m pretty sure all you gotta do now is just

shove them in your ears and you’ll be able to hear the instrumental queues and shit” phoebe took one of the ear buds, placing it over your ear and clipping it to the monitor behind your back. a crew member came over, passing your previous guitar to you.

“dude no way- that’s a sick fucking guitar. gretsch right?” phoebe gushed over your guitar. you slung the strap over your head, holding it close as you nodded your head.

“g6136t 1959 white falcon. my prized possession” you held onto the neck of the guitar, strumming a few simple cords. phoebe was stunned for a moment.

“it’s sick. i love it. you’ll need to let me play something on it later. that is a threat”

“you can later. if you buy me lunch” you held your hand out for phoebe to shake. she nodded her head. shaking your hand firmly.

“a deal. now go out there and have fun kid” phoebe gave you a quick shove, pushing you towards the front of the stage where the x was located on the ground. it was a bit intimidating. the venue was massive. a lot of people would be here, watching you sing live. phone cameras held up towards you. all eyes would be on you. you took a deep breath and started to strum the first cords to your opening song.

“fucking banger after banger! i love it”. you quickly got off the stage, phoebe praised you as she helped unclip the wires from your back.

“it wasn’t that good”

“you need confidence in yourself. you won’t get anywhere in life if you aren’t confident in yourself kid. you did good and i can confirm- i don’t lie” phoebe wrapped the leads up, passing them to the nearby crew. you settled your guitar in the stand slot by the stage. it’ll stay there for now until the show.

“so, are we thinking lunch?” phoebe questioned. she was on her phone, typing away quickly.

“we can do lunch, yeah. whenever you want to go.” you replied, following the older woman like a lost puppy as she walked down the hall.

“we’re gonna be meeting lucy and jb at this cool cafe we were at before. i think youll like it. it’s like.. five minutes away from here.” phoebe clicked on google maps

you checked the time on your phone, surprised as the numbers stared back at you.

10:45am.

the two of you walked out of the venue through the back door. the sun was up in the sky now, warm and bright. phoebe shoved some sunglasses on her face. it was the middle of july, you’re favourite month by far. when the sun would shine bright in the morning and last for longer in the evening.

“have you been here before?” phoebe turned back to look at you. sunglasses now raised on her head. she was looking around the entrance of the venue. “we may need to pass the front entrance. you’re cool with that right?”

“yeah- that’s fine by me. no haven’t been here before. i don’t think i’ve been to many places other than my home town. so, this is new.” phoebe took the lead. walking side by side, the two of you passed the front entrance, a few fans waving to both of you as you quickly walked along, catching up to phoebe.

“it’s a nice place. i was here for my last tour. didn’t get to go to this cafe, though. it was on my list of places to try” the two of you made your way down the street, passing the small shops on your way, mentally taking note of the stores you want to visit after lunch.

the cafe was around the corner. seats planted outside with umbrellas in the middle of the tables. plants and flowers were scattered along the ground. it had a cosy atmosphere to it. phoebe pushed the door open, you trailing behind her.

the smell of coffee beans hit your nose strong. the loud sound of the coffee machine could be heard faintly with a buzz of chattering from various corners of the building.

“what do you want?” phoebe stared at the menu behind the cashier. “honestly, feeling like some iced coffee right now” she added.

“maybe an iced coffee too. whatever you’re having” you smiled back.

you could tell why the boys wanted to go here. it was buzzing with life. soft lofi music playing in the background from a phone connected to a cable. the baristas were even nicer. phoebe ordering two iced lattes, both with vanilla. you scanned around the cafe, pinpointing julien and lucy in the corner, lucy on her phone, back turned to you and julien staring over. you waved and julien gave a thumbs up.

“i got you vanilla. i feel like you’re a vanilla iced latte type of person. if not, then you’re boring and i’m ending this friendship ” phoebe handed you the iced coffee and trailed down to the corner of the cafe.

“it’s my favourite so that’s good” you took a seat beside julien, phoebe sitting across from you, beside lucy.

“thought you guys got lost. soundcheck go well?” julien commented. eyes fixated on the menu in front of her, scanning through the items. you picked up a spare menu, sliding the other two towards lucy and phoebe.

“it was good” you nodded, eyes going down the list of sandwiches. “first time, was scary but it went good thankfully”

“had to help clip on the monitor and ears” phoebe put down the menu, seeming to already decide on what she wanted.

“in fairness, it is tricky. especially for the first time” lucy added with a nod. “i’m glad it went well, kid. i’m excited to see you preform tonight” the barista came over, taking everyone’s orders.

“we’ll have to celebrate tonight. first show of the tour” everyone looked over at phoebe. she was playing some sort of mobile app on her game

“like what? pizza?” you questioned. phoebe looked up from her phone. “could be nice yeah. i was thinking maybe to a bar?”

“you do realise they aren’t twenty one yet right?” lucy gave phoebe a look. “we aren’t bringing someone underage to a bar. we can just do something on the bus”

the barista comes back with four plates filled with sandwiches, handing them to each one of you. you thanked the woman with a small smile.

you listened to the boys discuss god knows what. hopping from topic to topic. talking about future projects, favourite places they want to visit on tour and more. you zoned out a bit, thoughts loud in your head as you took a bite of your sandwich.

feeling a small tap on your shoulder, you look over at julien who nods towards phoebe.

“you ok? just been a little quiet” lucy and phoebe were staring at you. it made you feel a little anxious.

“no- no i’m fine! i just.. zone out while eating?” you say, more as a question than an answer. it was true. you were one who liked to listen to conversations and add to them when feeling necessary. listening to the boys ramble about what type of cat breed each would be was something that entertained you a lot.

“anyway- i think you’d be a rag doll” phoebe went back to her ramble, pointing a finger at you. “i have no explanation why but it fits”

“i can see it. or a calico” lucy added, scanning over you like she was trying to analyse you. you let the two go back into a discussion. you and julien watching amused as the two in front of you have a debate whether or not julien is in fact a siamese.

“i’d love to let y’all continue this debate but we need to get going” julien tapped the watch on her phone.

12:10pm.

time was going by insanely fast. it had you a bit surprised. stepping out of the booth, you let julien slip out, going to pay for everyone’s food. you followed lucy and phoebe outside the cafe, sitting down with lucy on one of the small chairs by the window.

“it’s a lovely day out today” phoebe commented, one hand on her hip, the other over her eyes as she looked around. “welcome to los angeles” lucy chuckled, placing her sun glasses on her face.

“mhm. if the weather is like this for the tour, im fucking ready to play shows with open roofs. can you imagine how warm it’d be?” phoebe turned around to face the two of you. she was about to say more when julien shoved the door open, tucking the receipt into her back pocket.

“let’s get going. cmon” she took the lead, walking ahead. you and lucy walked together as phoebe took off in a skip.

“so how’s the first few hours been?” lucy asked, slinging her totebag to the other shoulder. you could see the outline of two books. it explained why she was gone a bit earlier.

“very new. i like stopping in new places and getting to explore more of the town. did you go shopping?” you questioned.

lucy nodded her head, excitedly. she took out two books from her bag. “me and jb went to this bookstore just after soundcheck. seen these two- haven’t read them before but they sound interesting. do you read?”

“sometimes? it’s kinda hard to read words on a page.. as say online”

“ that’s totally fair. if you ever wanna take a look at these you can! i have a few on the bus if you ever want any” you thank lucy, helping her put the books back into the totebag.

julien and phoebe were a little bit ahead. stopped by two people you can only recognise as fans. julien is waving to you and lucy, trying to bring you two over. you both pick up your pace, watching as the two girls eyes widen even more upon noticing you both come over.

“we can do one big group photo if that’s ok? we’re on a bit of a time schedule and have to get back to the venue” julien voiced out. the two fans were quick to agree. lucy grabbed your arm and brought you close to her. sandwiched in between phoebe and lucy. julien was to your left. the two girls in front of you, phone held up for a selfie.

“thank you so much-“ one of them says, excitedly. the other girl was quickly taking bracelets off her arm, passing them out to you and the boys.

“these are awesome man, did you make them?” julien gasped, putting the bracelet on her wrist, showing it off. the bracelet given to you was a title from your debut album. you quickly put it on your wrist and gave the two girls a big smile.

“we made them in the queue today. been in line since four this morning. wanted to get some lunch and go back to queuing but somehow seen you all.“ one of the girls bounced on her toes excitedly. it made you almost feel like crying. obviously in a good way. they were meeting their idols and were excited. you remembered feeling like that when you were younger. making friends in the lines for soundcheck and general admission.

“we’ve been really big fans of you since your first album came out- so it’s a bit of a surprise and honourable moment to have met you” it took you a small moment to realise the two girls were talking directly to you. your eyes widened in surprise.

“really?- god that was like - when i was eighteen.. holy shit- wow” you laughed. you felt phoebe pat your back “we got a couple of ogs here”

“we’ll let you guys go back to the venue. don’t want to keep you waiting any longer!“ the two girls in front of you were already saying their goodbyes. julien has started to already take off, lucy behind her. you gave the two girls a wave and said your goodbyes.

“that was so fucking sweet” phoebe had an arm wrapped around your shoulder, looking at her yellow beaded bracelet. you felt excitement buzz in your stomach and chest.

“my first time meeting fans of my music. i’m still processing it- it’s crazy”

“you better get used to it kid. it’ll be happening a lot more now”

the four of you managed to sneak back into the venue without being spotted. of course it was circling on twitter, the photo the two fans took. proudly posting the photo onto the social media app. fan accounts and update accounts were reposting it. everyone was excited and ready for the concert tonight.

you found yourself situated backstage in the dressing room. sitting in the couch with your legs propped up on the small coffee table, you scrolled through twitter, reading tweets of fans excited for the show, fans commenting how cool you looked in the photos.

it was a bit unusual for you to get this type of attention. of course, you were a known musician on social media since you were eighteen. this was the first time you were ever seen outside, photographed by fans, seen outside. other than the photos you posted on instagram, selfies and photo dumps, memes and photos of your cats from your parents house. this was a new era for you and your fans.

an era to see you finally preform your songs to an audience. the events of 2020 hit a couple years ago, having released your debut album during the midst of the quarantine where you didn’t have to worry about what others thought about your music face to face. it felt a bit more easier for you to click publish and post the songs onto spotify and youtube. knowing you didn’t need to wake up early the next day for school.

you gained a lot of attraction in such short amount of time. when everyone was spending their days online and working from home. it meant opening their minds to new music pallets. your album charted number one in multiple countries, featuring in multiple playlists. tv shows we’re reaching out to you, asking for an opportunity to virtually do an interview with you.

it was scary but exciting. pre recording a live video of you singing in your bedroom to send to the late night shows, having to wake up early the next day for your math zoom meeting.

this would’ve been your first time preforming those songs again. but to a live audience.

“-ah?” you blinked, looking up at julien who somehow was stood in front of you.

“huh?”

“i said are you ready? you gotta get your makeup done. it’s nearly showtime. doors are gonna be opening in… i think an hour?”

an hour? you quickly pressed the button on the side of your phone and glanced at the time.

4:30pm

“shit” you stood up abruptly. times going by too quick for comfort. julien placed a hand on your shoulder, a comforting and reassuring look in her eyes

“listen kid. you’re gonna do great. trust me. i get you may be a bit worried or nervous. don’t be. we’ll be here. you’ll rock the stage” she patted you on the back and shoved you out the door to the main lounge. phoebe and lucy were in the small chairs, getting their makeup and hair done. the stylist guides you to the chair. you end up zoning out, lost in thought while you let the stylish work. you thought over the songs and the cords.

what if you couldn’t remember the cords on your guitar or missed a couple? what if your mic doesn’t work? all these thoughts entered your head as you felt the small bit of anxiety creep up on you again.

as the stylised finished, you got up from the chair and walked back into the dressing room. moving on autopilot, you grabbed your stage outfit. a skirt with fishnets and docs along with a crop top . was this good? did it look ugly. there was no way to change it not, you were running low on time. shops would be closing by this time so you would have to make do.

you shakily got changed, careful to not ruin your makeup or hair. it was just you in the dressing room thankfully. as much as you appreciate the boys, you didn’t want them to see you like this. scared and nervous, unable to form a proper sentence without bursting into tears.

a knock on the door made you jump. an unfamiliar voice was behind the door, announcing 20 minutes until show time. probably one of the crew members. you walked over to the door, holding onto the handle for a moment before shoving it open.

your docs click against the marbled ground as you make your way down the hallway to the stage entrance. it was quite easy to follow thankfully, with signs in big black bold writing, indicating every turn to where the nearest side of the stage is.

you made it to the left side of the stage. crew members and the boys were all huddled together. lucy looked up and met your eyes, grinning widely and running over to you.

“you look amazing!” the boys took turns in complimenting you, phoebe making you do a twirl as she whistles. “are you excited?” she asked. you noticed she was holding your guitar, she passed it to julien as she took something from the crew member. it was the in ears and monitors.

“phoebe is taking the role of tour crew i see” julien teased, holding your guitar by the neck. phoebe clipped the monitor behind your back, linking it up to your in ear monitors and connecting them to the guitar in julien’s hand. “i’ve been touring for a long time man, it comes naturally to me”

she shoved one of the ear buds in your ear, fitting the other. your hands were shaking with a cold sweat, each second that phoebe helped you set up was a countdown to the first performance in front of a crowd.

“seems to be all done. perfect. when you win a grammy, you better mention me and the time i helped you with this” phoebe joked lightheartedly. julien passed the guitar back to you. you slung it over your shoulder. the familiar white and gold on the guitar made you feel a little calmer. you knew how the guitar sounded. this was your main instrument. nothing could go wrong.

“five minutes” a crew member passed by quickly, clipboard in their hand.

6:25pm.

you took deep breaths. the beat of your heart was the only thing you can hear right now. the faint voices of the boys were muffled.

“you got this kid. give it your all” you didn’t even realise you had your eyes closed. opening them up to meet the three women in front of you.

“i got this yes- i fucking do” you tried to hype yourself up. you could hear the cheering and a screaming get louder as the intros start playing.

you gripped your guitar tightly and took off, running out in stage.

—

7:30pm.

“HOLY SHIT LETS FUCKING GO” the minute you stepped foot off stage you were bombarded with three pairs of arms around you.

“KID- THAT WAS AWESOME” julien had her arms on your shoulders, shaking you aggressively as she jumped around. you let a sigh of relief wash over you. the anxiety was long gone. replaced with the excitement of preforming. everything went fine. it was perfect. it was the best show you’ve ever done.

“your first show, how do you feel!” lucy slung an arm over your shoulder, all of you walking back to the dressing room. the boys had 30 minutes before they were expected to go on stage.

“i’m fucking tired” you sighed, dropping down onto the couch.

“you can stay here or watch us backstage whatever you prefer. phoebe sat down beside you, grabbing your legs and resting them on her lap.

“just give me like.. an hour to recover and i’ll be fine” you said half jokingly. you needed a minute to recover from the adrenaline.

“listen, we’ll be back at the entrance we were when you were going on stage. if you wanna meet us there you can, if not don’t worry about it” phoebe got back up again, ready to head back out.

you were left in the dressing room alone. opening your phone, you took to twitter. most of the tweets you came across were all positive things. fans excited to see you preform and talking and crying over your setlist. it was a positive outcome.

you sat on twitter for a couple of more minutes. the boys were just starting their opening song. you promised to come watch soon. getting up, you changed into some more comfier clothes. shorts and an oversized tshirt. you nearly folded your stage clothes, putting them away in the suitcase that was open on the ground, shoved up against the wall.

you made your way back the same way you went earlier. following the sighs on the wall, you made your way to the side of the stage. lucy was closest to you, you watched as the boys preformed true blue.

taking a seat on one of the benches, you sat and listed. occasionally taking videos of some of the songs. the boys were talented amazing musicians. lighting the venue up with their stage presence as they ran and jumped around on stage. belted out song lyrics and high notes. talked and joked with the audience.

as someone who would normally be in the pit where everyone else is, sitting behind the stage was something you enjoyed. it was new and exciting.

you watched as the boys took their last bow and ran off stage. they seemed to be full of excitement and adrenaline.

“first night down, boys! lets go!” phoebe cheered. she quickly untangled herself from the guitar and wires, handing them to the staff and crew surrounding each one of you.

“you guys were amazing. probably one of the best shows i’ve seen in my entire life” you complimented. each of them seemed thankful and honoured.

“we need to get our shit together and go back on the bus. are we still up for pizza? i know it’s late” lucy questioned, the four of you all walking back into the dressing room. you opted for your usual spot on the couch as julien went into the bathroom first to change.

“pizza works fine by me. have it delivered to the bus before we take off” you nodded, opening your phone, clicking on one of the small mobile apps you downloaded for the tour bus journey.

“good idea, very smart” phoebe nodded, opening a packet of gummies. julien stepped out in some jeans and a hoodie. it was phoebes turn to use the bathroom.

“also wanna take an early night too. that means no staying up ‘till 4am” julien gave phoebe, making way for her to enter the bathroom. the silver haired woman stuck out her tongue, shutting the bathroom door closed.

“i think 12 or 1am is a suitable time for us to sleep on tour” lucy said from the corner. she was zipping up her suitcase. “1:30 at latest”

you couldn’t argue with that. the events of today wore you down. you didn’t even know if you’d survive until 1:30.

phoebe opened the bathroom door, coming out in one of lucy’s hoodies and shorts. she quickly walked over to her own suitcase. packing the stage clothes into the smaller compartment of her bag. lucy was the last in the bathroom.

“when luce is out we can leave. i can order the pizza now? so it’s quicker” julien stood up with a sigh, cracking her back.

“sounds good, you know our usual” phoebe snapped her head over to you, pointing a finger.

“what type of pizza do you like? if you say pineapple on pizza i will kick you from this tour”

you raised an eyebrow and squinted your eyes. “what’s wrong with pineapple on pizza?” this made phoebe groan as julien chuckled to herself.

“this is uncalled for. i’m calling the tour manager immediately- give me my phone!” phoebe dramatically sighed.

“this is homophobic” you commented, a small smirk on your face. phoebes eyes widen as she gasps

“HOW IS THAT HOMOPHOBIC-“ julien bursts out laughing at phoebes outburst. lucy was stood at the door frozen, having walked in on this conversation.

“this is a homophobic target towards me and my like for pineapple on pizza” you joked, feeling yourself become a little bit more comfortable around the boys. phoebe snaps her head towards lucy, waving her arms around. “DO YOU SEE THIS SHIT?”

“i don’t know.. i kinda agree with them on this one”

“HOW DARE YOU-“

you sat back on the couch, trying to wipe the small tears from your eyes as you laughed harder.

maybe this tour won’t be as bad after all.

that is if phoebe doesn’t kick you off early for ordering pineapple and ham pizza.

#pom writes #younger artist au series #phoebe bridgers x reader #lucy dacus x reader #julien baker x reader #boygenius x reader #boygenius fanfic #boygenius au #boygenius one shot #julien baker au #julien baker fanfic #julien baker one shot #lucy dacus au #lucy dacus one shot #lucy dacus fsnfic #phoebe bridgers fanfic #phoebe bridgers one shot #phoebe bridgers au

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givemea-dam-break · 2 years ago

Note

hi!! i absolutely adore your writing, and i have a request for reader x lockwood :) what if reader is smart and likes to read and stuff but is super oblivious and can’t make a first move for the life of her? and maybe it’s her first kiss or something idk :D

a/n: ooooh yes this is a cute idea!!! i hope you enjoy <3 this is in spite of netflix cancelling the show. fuck netflix.

warnings: none female reader

Correct Me If I'm Wrong - Anthony Lockwood

You're not sure when the last time you felt truly pretty was.

Most days are spent either in tatty pyjamas that are due a wash, or clothes with a myriad of ectoplasm burns and a permanent smell of lavender that clogs up your nose and makes you need to sneeze, no matter what kind of fabric conditioner you shove into the washing machine. Your hair? Well, it's certainly seen better days.

But today. Today.

Lucy stands behind you, zipping up the back of your dress as you smooth the front of it until some of the wrinkles have flattened out a little. The satin gleams in the hazy light of your shared attic bedroom, and you find yourself smiling at your reflection in the mirror. When was the last time you dolled yourself up for something?

That's not to say you're overly concerned with how you look on a day-to-day basis, it's just that the ghost-fighting business doesn't really allow for nice outfits. Except for tonight, you suppose.

The Fittes at Fifty Ball is tonight, and you've been dreading it. In all honesty, you would much rather stay at home and get as much research done about the Bone Glass before the members of Lockwood and Co take on a heist to retrieve it, but you've not got much of a choice. You all need to look as inconspicuous as possible seeing as the very thing you need, a book by Mary Dulac, is stored in the Black Library at the Fittes headquarters.

"All done," Lucy says. "Ready to steal from the biggest, most well-protected agency in the UK?"

No, not really, but still you say, "Always."

"I'm going to get our stuff ready." She fiddles with the billowing sleeves of her blue dress. "Want me to pack those biscuits you like?"

"Absolutely, Luce," you say. "Thank you."

When she leaves, you find yourself staring at your reflection for a moment longer and liking the person you see. With a satiny green dress and hair that looks like more than a few minutes of effort have been put in, you look starkly different from usual. It makes you almost yearn for more party heists.

As you're tugging on your boots, there's a knock on the door. The pattern rapped out on the wood is familiar and it makes you smile, and you say, "Come in."

Lockwood steps through the open door and makes his way up the steps into the bedroom. His dark suit makes him look even more professional than usual, and his hair has been combed back neatly, showcasing those mischief-filled dark eyes you love so much. He's carrying something behind his back, making sure to keep it hidden. But the thing you take the most notice of is his tie. It's green.

It likely means nothing. Lockwood wears whatever he wants whenever he wants with little regard for colour - come on, he wears salmon pink socks! - but something about it feels purposeful. You've never seen him wear a green tie. Hell, you didn't even know he owned one. And this is the exact same shade as your dress.

He stops a few feet short of your bed, watching with glittering eyes as you stand and smooth out your dress once more. There's a smile playing on his lips, softer than his usual grin, and it sends a shiver down your spine.

"How do I look?" you ask, trying to sound more confident than you feel.

Having him see you in a dress, with your hair styled and your makeup done, feels like standing on a stage in front of thousands of people. You're way more nervous than you should be.

For a moment, he says nothing, and you worry that he thinks it looks terrible. Maybe you should've picked the chiffon dress rather than satin, or maybe the red instead of green. You thought you had made your hair look quite nice, but maybe it looks quite stupid...

And then he says, "You look - you look beautiful, (name)."

There's a fluttery feeling in your chest, but you shove it down. You can't let yourself hope for anything that likely won't happen. Friends tell each other they look beautiful. You and Lucy do it all the time! This is no different just because it's Lockwood. Well, maybe it's a little different.

"You, too," you say. Your cheeks flush. "Well, not beautiful. Actually, I mean, if you want to be then sure. I just meant -"

He laughs, and your voice fades off. It's quite possibly your favourite sound, his laugh, because of how light it sounds. After working with him for a few months now, it's easy enough to tell that Lockwood isn't doing great a lot of the time. With his recklessness, the little jokes he makes that aren't really jokes, it's more than evident. So, now, hearing his laugh sound so genuine makes you smile and you feel a little less embarrassed.

"Thank you," he says, his smile becoming brighter. "I, uh, I have something for you. That is if you want it, of course."

"You know I hate surprises."

"Trust me. You'll like this one."

The hand that was behind his back appears, holding what looks to be an old book. The cover is faded, and the pages have browned, but he holds it delicately on the flat palm of his hand. Curiously, you step closer to him and gingerly take it from his hands.

Upon reading the title and flipping through the first few pages, your heart swells with gratitude. "This is a first edition."

"I'd certainly hope so with the trouble I went to finding it."

Your fingers carefully slip through each page, and you smile so widely you're afraid your cheeks might tear. "Lockwood, this had to have cost a fortune! You didn't have to get me this."

His posture is casual, but there's a glimmer of happiness in his eyes that is unmistakable. "I heard you talking to George about it a few weeks ago. It's your favourite book, and your birthday was recently. In all reality, I'd hoped to give it to you then, but today was the day I managed to get my hands on it."

"You -" The words get stuck in your throat, and you can almost feel yourself tearing up. "I've wanted this since I was a kid. I - Thank you, Lockwood. Seriously. This is..."

"You work so hard here," Lockwood says softly, "and I want you to know it doesn't go unnoticed. Besides, you've always been here for me. I wanted to give you something in return."

"I don't need anything in return for being a decent human being."

"Oh, all right. I'll take it back then."

Clutching the book tightly to your chest, you listen happily as he laughs again, throwing his head back a little. It's a wonderful sight, one that has your heart racing, one that makes you itch to throw your arms around him in the tightest embrace you can muster to simply show how grateful you are for the book, for his laugh and his smile and his presence.

But you refrain. Who's to say he won't just push you away?

"Thank you," you say again. "You're the best."

"I hope you're not just saying that because I pay your wages."

It's almost unnoticeable, but he shuffles forward ever so slightly. Already, you can feel the warmth radiating off of him and smell the faint scent of bitter tea and cheap shampoo underneath whatever aftershave he's put on. Your breath catches in your throat. There's less than a foot between you, but it has you fumbling for something to say or do.

"We should probably head downstairs," he murmurs, gaze fixed on yours. "The taxi will be here soon."

You nod. Neither of you moves.

He looks at you with those coppery eyes of his with a smile that feels distinctly private, and your heart thuds so loudly in your chest that you're convinced he can hear it, too. Words echo in your mind, words you want to say to him more than anything else, but your lips stay firmly shut.

How are you meant to tell him how you feel? That every time he merely looks at you, your heart starts beating as if you've just run a marathon? That you long to be the only person he shares his private smiles with, the only one that ever hears his true, unburdened laughs when you make a joke or make a fool of yourself? How are you supposed to explain that the times you spend with him are your favourites or that you search a dozen different shops simply to find his favourite biscuits to make him smile?

It's easy enough to list it to yourself, to find the words, but to say them to him? It's a different thing entirely, and it makes your mouth feel dry and your hands tremble a little.

"I need to tell you something," Lockwood says, and his voice has become breathier, quieter. "Just in case things go wrong tonight.”

"Nothing's going to go wrong."

He makes to take your book from your hands, and you hesitate. He only laughs, promising that it isn't going far, and slips it onto your crowded bookcase with gentle hands.

Gentle hands that soon reach for yours.

The touch takes you by surprise, but it's welcome. His hands are soft and warm, and they envelop yours. Now he has to be able to feel your racing pulse, surely. There's no way he can't.

"(name)..." He pauses, looking away from you for a moment. When his gaze returns, it's soft, nervous, even, and you find yourself transfixed, unable to look away. "I've been trying to tell you this for a few weeks now, but I couldn't - I couldn't figure out the words, so I resorted to other things. Making your tea in the mornings, asking you to come along with me on errands."

Bright, beautiful hope flickers in your chest, and this time you don't push it down. This time, you nurture it, letting it bring a small smile to your lips. Lockwood sees it, and he straightens a little with confidence. Not much, nowhere near as confident as he usually seems, but it keeps him speaking.

"Ever since you walked through the front door for your interview, I've never stopped thinking of you. Day and night, you're on my mind. The way you scrunch your nose when you're listening for Visitors, or how you become entirely unreachable when you read. How I can ask you anything, and you know the answer to it almost immediately."

His hands are shaking a little bit. You squeeze them softly.

"I like the way you smile, and how happy you are when I remember your order for Arif's. Most of all, I like -"

He's struggling with the words.

"Are you trying to say you like me?"

Part of you doesn't believe it. How could he? He's Anthony Lockwood, a boy from the city who owns his own company that breaks how the system of ghost-hunting works by simply having him be in charge. And you? You're a girl from some tiny town, a nobody whose only virtues are being relatively smart and being able to hear ghosts, though not on a grand scale. In reality, your paths would never have crossed if not for you finding a little clipping in the newspaper advertising for an agent.

So how could he like you? With his admirable Sight, the confidence that you always lack, the charm that could be used to entrance any girl he could ever so wish?

But here he stands, so close to you with shaky hands and faltering words, looking at you as if you've been placed here by some otherworldly forces solely for the purpose of enchanting him. He looks at you as if you're more than you really are, like someone a person could love and cherish.

"No," he says.

And your heart sinks all the way down to the floor, followed by your eyes. Your hands slacken in his, and your skin feels hot with embarrassment. You dread to think of how red you've become, and you turn your face away from him, instead looking at the book he gifted you. Were you stupid for hoping it meant more? Probably.

"I love you."

Three words. Three simple words that have your gaze snapping back to his, your heart rushing to your throat, and your hands tensing all at the same time. Three simple words that spark a blazing fire inside your chest. But, still, there's an ache in your throat.

"Don't kid with me, Lockwood."

His eyes are completely sincere, crinkled slightly with humour. "I'm not."

"You're about to laugh."

"Only because you're funny."

"I -" Your hands slip from his, and you brush your hair out of your face, faltering back a step. "You're being serious?"

With slightly pink cheeks and an almost shy smile, he says, "I am. I wouldn't joke about this, (name)."

"You - You love me? Why?"

"Didn't you listen to that long spiel I just had?" Once more, he takes a step closer. Then another until he's standing even closer than before, close enough that you can feel his breaths ruffling your hair slightly. "Because you're you. Because I admire and adore every single part of and about you."

You have to tilt your head to look at him with him being so close. "Have you hit your head recently?"

"If I have, and this is a dream, then I'm glad you're the girl of my dreams."

"Girl in your dreams," you correct quietly, halfheartedly.

Lockwood smiles. "I love that about you, too. That incessant need to correct me on anything I say."

"Someone's got to."

"Okay, well, correct me if I'm wrong, but would I be right in assuming that you feel the same?"

The words catch in your throat, but you nod regardless, smiling when his smile melts into his wide grin. This grin, it isn't the newspaper one. The infamous Lockwood Grin. This is only for you, something for you both to share solely between yourselves, and it's something you feel eternally grateful for being able to see, never mind be the cause of.

"Fantastic," he says, "because there's something I've been wanting to do for what feels like a lifetime now."

Your voice comes out shaky. "Would it perhaps involve kissing me?"

It does, apparently, because he leans closer until your faces are almost touching. His hands cup your face so gently it's as if they've been created from the air itself, but he waits, searching your eyes for any hesitation or rejection.

He never finds it. When your face tilts in accordance with his, he takes his cue and presses his lips onto yours.

You've never kissed anyone before, so the feeling is surreal. It's as if the very world around you melts away into nothingness until all you're aware of is him and his hands on your face, yours on his chest, his lips on yours. By no means is the kiss long, but it feels like eternity in a single second. Everything feels right and perfect.

When he pulls away, you're a little lost for breath, but you smile at him nonetheless, egged on by his dazzling grin. His hands still cup your face, and you're still clutching the blazer at his chest, but neither of you makes to move. Not when this feels so right.

"I'd do that again," he says softly, "but we have a taxi to get in."

"Who cares? One more?"

And he obliges before taking your hand in his and leading you out of the room. All the while, you yourself grin. Maybe you should be hopeful more often.

#anthony lockwood x reader #lockwood x reader #lockwood and co x reader #lockwood and co fanfiction #lockwood and co #lockwood and co netflix #anthony lockwood #lucy carlyle #george karim #x reader #fanfiction #givemea-dam-break

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avalil18 · 9 months ago

Text

A New Addition

Summary: you and Joe tell your families about the new addition you are about to add into your lives!

Warnings: fluff, kissing, miscarriage talk

Pairing: Joe burrow x reader

—————-

About a couple days ago you started not to feel good and found out you are late. So you decided to take a pregnancy test.

You and Joe got married about a year ago in May. It was the happiest day of your lives! Both you and Joe talked about kids before and said whenever it happens you guys will be ready and be by each other’s side for all of it. Through thick and thin. You were so nervous because you didn’t know how Joe was going to react. He had a post-practice interview a couple months ago and a reporter asked him if he was ready to have kids. You could tell Joe was a little mad and taken back because the reporters know not to really ask any personal questions about joes private life but Joe was nice and calm about it and said “I’m not a big fan with talking about my private life but whenever the time comes me and my wife would be ready but let’s stick to football questions right now.” And you thought that was a great answer given Joe is not very open to the public about that stuff. Once in the bathroom You take the test and wait 2 minutes. It was the longest 2 minutes of your life! When the alarm went off on your phone your heart started beating a thousand miles per second and you walked over to the bathroom counter to pick up the test. And there it was two blue lines across the screen of the test. You couldn’t believe it! You and Joe are going to be parents! You started crying from happiness but also you were a little scared to be honest. When you turned 20 you found out if you were to become pregnant there could be a possibility of a miscarriage due a surgery you had when you were 16. You didn’t want to go through that. So you sat on your bathroom floor with the test in hand trying to capture the moment and take everything in. Once feeling calm enough to get up you ran down stairs and quickly grabbed your keys to your car to go to target and pick out a onesie. Hopefully nobody recognized you and thankfully nobody did. Once home it was already 6pm and that was the time Joe got home from practice so you quickly ran to the kitchen counter and set the pregnancy test in counter along with the onesie. You smiled at the sight of it laying on the counter and took a pic then set up your camera and clicked record to film joes reaction. After a few minutes you heard the door open. This is it. Here goes nothing! “Y/n?��Joe asks. “In the kitchen!” You say. Joe walked in with a black shirt and black sweatpants and looked so handsome like always. He dropped his bags and opened his arms to give you a hug. You quickly feel into his embrace and said “I have a surprise for you!” “You do?!” He said! “Close your eyes and when I tell you open,ok?!” You told him. “Ok!” He said. You grabbed his hand and led him to the counter with his eyes closed. “Open” you say once stopped. Joe opened his eyes and looked around confused then stopped at what caught his eye on the counter. He gasped and looked at you. “Really!”he said “yes!” You answered back. “You’re going to be a dad Joey!” You said with a big smile and wrapped your arms around his neck. He kissed you and said “God! I love you y/n and our baby.” He placed his right hand on your belly. “We will get through it y/n, ok? Promise!” He said knowing there could be a problem with you being pregnant. “I know but I’m still worried.” You said in a sad tone. “I know but I’m right here and will be with you through the thick and thin.” Joey said. That night Joe couldn’t keep his hands off your stomach and you felt better knowing you had a great husband who would be there.

A couple days later, yours and joes families came over for dinner. You were wearing leggings and a black oversized crewneck. You know you don’t have to get dressed up because it’s juts family and you are eating at home but you also weren’t in the mood to dress up because you didn’t feel the greatest due to the bun in the oven. “Joe they are here!” You say as you walk to the front door to greet your in-laws and parents. After a great dinner with your families you and Joe decide it’s time to tell them the big news! “So, um me and y/n have something we need to say.” Joe says rubbing his neck while smiling at you. You smile back and give Joe a nod and pull out the pregnancy test you kept in your sleeve and you and Joe both say “we’re pregnant!” “OMG!” Both parents say and come over to hug you and Joe. “We will be there for y/n and Joe every step in the way and always a phone call away!” Robin says and jimmy and your parents agreeing. They both know what could happen during your time being pregnant and know it can be hard not knowing if everything will be ok. But you are so lucky to have a great support system.

———————

#joe burrow

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aldo1410 · 1 year ago

Text

I can't leave

Because I am waiting for God to come

And kiss me at midday

That kiss sweet

Who cares for me my God

I know you care God

The air feels fine

Here outside

I am dealing with God know

Can't you see

I am busy with him?

Once I open my ear

I heard your gentle words

The little flowers that

Are planted in the neighboors garden is called daisy

I haven't got a woman yet

I am not interested in it

Deep down I am a good person

I am a good hearted man

The answer that you always give me is

Don't worry

Everything will be fine

As long as I am here walking with you

Guiding you along with me

You tell me you have nothing to fear

You assure me that nothing bad is going to happen to me

When your gone

I will love you the right away

I believe that somethings are better left undone

When you are just too tired to do it

The rain fals like water from the sky

Hear, soul and song is what I am hearing

somebody playing that tune in the guitar

I recognize it because I heard it a thousand times before

I never run wild

I am too old for that

My younger days are over

I want to know what I am doing wrong

Please tell me God

What kind of man I am?

A man with feelings

A man who thinks of others and not only himself

I am gaining control of my life God

I am not loosing it

God is my empire

My home is like heaven to me

God

If you could just understand that

It is where my heart is

I am not always brave God

You have to understand that

I never lied to you

I have to plan for my future

I have to stop feeling sorry for myself

And take some action

The nights are cold now

And when I sleep I think of you

And every day when is midday I know I will see you again

Having a good friend is important to me God

And that good friend is you

The next day at midday I heard the rain

It was coming down hard

I quess we just have to stay inside today

It is fine with me

Saturday I am going away

And I will board the midnight train

And when midday comes no matter where I will be

you will always be there with me

And by your side I will always be

In the morning I look out of the train window

And I see that the train

Is passing by the indian shores

Moving skies I see

They are bright today

Not a clooud in the sky

God I might be fooling myself

Sometimes I don't think I am being honest to myself

Inside my eyes I see that bright light

It is called the sun

The more I see it the more I like it

I am wearing my silk shirt

And my dresspants

And my dress shoes

I do it because I want to feel good and be presentable to others

I will lift up my hands towards your comamdmemts which I love

And I will meditate on your statue

Teach me oh God the way of your statue

And I will keep to the end

Give me understanding that I may keep your law

And observe it with my whole heart

When I think on my ways

I turn my feet to your testimonies

At midnight I rise to praise you

Though the cord of the wicked ensnare me

I do not forget your laws

I long for your salvation

I will sing a joyful song to you God

God I know that my eyes don't lie

To you

You see me

A tired man

God please take my anger away

Please don't tell me where the sun goes

I demand a better future from you

Please make sure I get all this pain and all this sorrow

Out of my life

How many thoughts must I think?

When will I learn to laugh again

And be me?

What can money bring me?

Only comfort

What violence can bring me

Pain and shame

I am the one that have to live with it

What Loneliness brings me sadness

What Issolation brings me

No hope

God I carry no gun loaded with bullets

I don't owed one either

There is a whole new wide world for me

Waiting to be discovered by me God

God your so good to me

Music can heal me God

And put happiness in me

God I have no strings atached to the mobsters

I will show the world that I care about God

I had finally arrived the next morning in Montreal

It was early in the morning and the sun was shining in my eyes

My eyes was getting sore from the sun light

I boarded the taxi and drove to the hotel

When I got there into the hotel I checked in

And went to sleep

I needed a rest badly

I didn't even unpacked my suitcase

I am having more faith in God now

Shadows shadows

Stop me from being a mad fighter

And turns me into a man

Step step up

This is the change

For step up

And be a man

And stop the brutal fight

And learn to control my emotions

I know God that you will help me with that

My heart quivered with a silent of anxiety

Even if I was banished to the darkest place

My love will never let be a lonely spirit

Because God will brighten my world

And the darkness would end

God I will give a chance to life

To pray

To listen to your loving kind words

To listen to the sound

I will give myself a chance to see the flowers that you made it grow

In the parks for everybody to see

You have grown it with your holly hands

God today is the day for me to built a better tomorrow

It is my only chance and hope

That you have given me

And I am going to use it

I am not going to waste it

Because God I want to built a better tomorrow

I will not think about my failours

But I will think about my acomplishments

God

I won't put myself down any more

God thank you for this day

And this day you are here walking beside me

At Night I enjoy looking at the stars

It takes courage for me to be the best I can be

It takes strength for me to conguer the world

It takes strength for me to surender when a bad tought enters my mind

It takes time for me to decide in what I want

It takes time for me to fit with the crowd

It takes strength for me to surrunder to my anger

What lies before me are small matters

As it is promised by the wind

As it is tender in my heart

As it is written in the sky for me and everybody else here on earth to read it

Love makes all things possible

Love is hope's shining star

Faith sees my day shining through

God a song is no song until I sing it

God yesterday was history

God tomorrow will be a mistery that waits for me

Today God is a gift that you gave me

Precious memories tender memories

Could comfort me next time I am in sorrow

Giving me a reason to look towards tomorrow

I can recall a word or deed

From an anuxpected source

That helped uplift my spirit

As I travelled on life's course

So I will never dwell on my troubles

Of a cross I had to bear,

Search deep withim my heart

And find sweet memories there

My life is full of mixture

Full of sunshine and rain

But memories of sunshine I can keep

Memories of rain I can let go

because I find it so sad

I will not quit even if things didn't work out for me God

Because there might be something that is better for me

I will wait for something else to come

It won't be the end of the world

0 notes

finerllines · 3 years ago

Text

hard times [dad!au]

a/n: i need everyone to ignore the title because it is impossible to think of titles and i didnt want to have boner in the title lol (also thank you to everyone who has read and reblogged by other stuff!!)

summary: harry can't help but be in love with his wife

wc: 1.5k+

tw: just some dad fluff but boners are mentioned like twice

///

Everyone knew that Harry was obsessed with his wife. The only thing that surpassed his love for his wife was his love for his wife as a mum, and his little twins.

When his twins were born about a year ago, he thought his heart was going to explode. Hearing his little boy and girl cry for the first time made him fall to his knees gasping for air, unable to stop tears from streaming down his face. He had anticipated the day for years, daydreaming about holding his children for the first time and marvelling at their beauty, but when the moment arrived, he was so overwhelmed with joy that all he could do was sob.

His family occupied his whole heart, and having them join him on his last tour was so special to him. Being ‘The Harry Styles’ and being a dad were his two favourite things. Performing to tens of thousands who practically worshipped him was great. Performing to tens of thousands who practically worshipped him and then going backstage to see his beautiful wife and children was even better. Getting to rock his babies to sleep and watch y/n nurse and take care of them never got old.

Now that tour has been over for a month or so and the Styles family had gotten the chance to settle into a new routine in their London home, Harry was high on domestic bliss. His babies were adjusting to their new schedule and were transitioning well to solid foods. But you couldn’t have guessed from the way y/n was frantically writing out a detailed schedule and double checking that the food for the night were prepped and ready to go.

It was her first time going out with friends since becoming a mum, and despite having no reason to worry, she was worried. All the coffees she drank to try and last through the night did nothing to help her nerves, hence, her checking everything over and over.

A fond smile stretched across Harry’s face as he watched y/n potter around the kitchen from the hallway. She was already dressed for the night in a glittery black one-shoulder dress, matching heels and a smudgy black eye liner look with a sharp red lip. Harry knew that this was her go-to when she wanted to look and feel her best. Despite still carrying some baby weight, seeing y/n all dressed up again took his breath away and immediately made him hot all over. She somehow got even more stunning. Her body was a reminder of how she provided for two babies, how she gave him the greatest gifts of his life, so of course he worshipped her body. In fact, he thinks he lusts after his wife even more now.

Once her bump started to show, he couldn’t keep his hands off of her – stroking it, speaking to it, and kissing it. His favourite part of the day was when they were finally in bed and he could get his hands on his wife. He loved moisturising her bump for her, massaging her legs and feet to help with the swelling, and when the twins came, rubbing nipple cream after they were done nursing, taking advantage of the opportunity to pepper little kisses all over her. And almost every night without fail he would get hard. He couldn’t help it, he was insatiable. His heart and his prick would both swell with affection and love upon seeing how good of a mum she was.

Dylan tugged at his curls, causing Harry to wince and say softly, “Ow baby, ya hurtin’ daddy.” He gently untangled his curls from Dylan’s little hand and smacked a kiss onto his cheek. “Bored of just standing here with daddy huh? Let’s go see your sister and mummy yeah.”

As he walked into the kitchen, he let out a low whistle and said, “Look at this absolute babe in the kitchen.”

“Stop it H,” y/n muttered shyly. Even after all these years he never failed to make her blush.

“Wha’? Am I not allowed to give my wife compliments anymore?” He cupped her face with his free hand and pressed his lips against hers. He nibbled at her bottom lip and his hand travelled down her body to wrap around her waist and press her body against his. As he tried to slip his tongue into her mouth, something firm pressed against her stomach, causing her to pull back and gasp playfully.

“H!”

“What!” he pouted.

She shook her head and teased, “We kissed for five seconds and you got hard.”

“Wrong,” he sang, raising his finger as if correcting her, “I’ve been hard for five minutes before we started kissing when I was watching you from over there.”

This earned him an eyeroll and a playful smack to the stomach.

“I can't compliment my wife, I can't get love boners, what's a husband supposed to do huh? You are so beautiful, and you take such good care of our babies, of course I’m gonna get hard. You make me feral. Hottest woman alive.”

“You are ridiculous.” She brushed him off getting shy again and started going through the babies’ routine for the night to try and take his attention off of her. “Make sure you test how hot the food is on your wrist before you feed them, and they need to finish their portions if not they will get hungry in the middle of –”

“Lovie,” Harry interrupted, “we'll be fine ok. I have done this a thousand times and the babies have been so well behaved yeah. Don’t worry about us and have fun, you deserve it ok.” He pulled her into him again and said, pressing soft kisses onto her face in between every word, “Go and enjoy yourself.”

“Okay, okay.” She passed Darcy to Harry who immediately nuzzled into her father’s warm chest. Harry carrying a baby on each hip was quite a sight, y/n supposes she understands his struggle because dad Harry did something to her.

Now that she didn’t have a baby on her, she felt exposed. Being in an outfit she would have worn before becoming a mum made her feel almost corny.

Sensing her change in mood immediately, Harry lowers his voice and asks with concern, “What’s wrong lovie?”

“It’s nothing,” she said, not wanting to bring down his mood. But of course, Harry knows his wife better than that, so he nudges his nose against her temple and whines, “Tell me, please.”

Her shoulders drop with a small sigh and she plays with the hem of her dress, her gaze refusing to meet his. “I just feel a bit … old. I’m a mum, almost turning 30 and I’m dressed as if I was still 20 years old.”

His brows knit together. “Hey! You’re not old. So what if you are almost 30, you look smoking hot in that dress and that makeup is sexy as fuck. I’m so fucking easy for you I got hard just from lookin’ at ya.” He then starts bouncing up and down to make his babies giggle. “Look at your mummy. Isn’t she the most beautiful woman ever? Aren’t we so lucky to have the best mummy ever?” Putting on a high pitched voice, he mimes the twins saying, “We love you mummy. We will be good for daddy so that you can get drunk. And when you come back you and daddy will make out and –”

“Harry Edward Styles!” she scolds. She gently hits his stomach again with a growing smile as he chuckled cheekily.

With one more goodbye and a kiss to each of her three babies, y/n finally left for her night out.

Closing the door behind her, y/n quietly unbuckled her heels and followed the low mumbling from the tv to where she expected Harry to be. In the living room was her 6ft husband curled up on the couch with Friends still playing. She knelt down beside his head and gently stroked his cheek and kissed his forehead. “Honey, wake up.”

With a whine, he uncurled himself and did a big stretch. When he blinked open his eyes and saw his wife, his mouth settled into a pout and asked hoarsely, “Kissy?”

“Of course honey,” she mumbled through a smile. He was too cute.

On their walk to their bedroom Harry refused to let go of her. He hugged her arm to his chest the entire time, pushed her hand away when she tried to unzip her dress herself, and hugged her from behind, resting his head on her shoulder and nuzzling into her neck as she took off her makeup and brushed her teeth.

She turned to face him and muttered into his cheek still buried in the crook of her neck, “You alright honey?”

“Mhmm,” he hummed, “just missed you tha’s all.”

“I missed you too. You wanna cuddle now?”

He squeezed her tighter and nodded. Unable to escape his embrace, y/n opted to walk to bed with her pouty husband clinging to her. When he found a comfortable spot cuddled up against her chest, he whispered, “I love you. Our babies are perfect. Our family is perfect.”

She couldn’t agree more.

#harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles one shot #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fluff #harry styles x reader #dad!harry #harry styles dad!au #harry styles imagines #harry styles oneshot #writing #let me know if you have any feedback!#inbox is always open :-)

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theveryworstthing · 4 years ago

Photo

So over on patreon Trevor asked for my take on the Addams Family and I grew up LOVING the Addams family movies so here we are. Instead of doing a straight up style interpretation, I decided to do a full on design challenge, using the characters as bases to make a black southern gothic Addams au. I actually drew the kids first, using the character bases of Wednesday and Pugsley to create some delightful kiddos I'm calling Sunday and Blanche. I of course then redesigned Gomez and Morticia into Carlisle and Mortesha.

The Addams have a very specific high aristocratic goth aesthetic (they've got a butler and nobody really works among other things) so in this re-imagining I wanted to go with vibes that run a little more middle class/upper middle class. I thought it would be interesting to think about what would be considered weird and off-putting in an entirely different culture, and how being a big ol' goth is way less controversial than it used to be.

I tried to keep this short (HAHAHAHAHAHA) so I didn't spin off into an essay about villain coded families, black people in the horror genre, and normalcy as it pertains to social survival, but just...bits of that are in these designs and lore. Keep that in mind.

Also I made the kids twins because they've flip flopped in age so much in different media and also twins run in my family (i'm the daughter of one). And let's face it, I'm pulling a lot of their southern gothic traits from living as a southern goth so *shrug*.

10 thousand pounds of lore incoming loooooooooool.

The Parents

From the moment he saw her he knew that there was a 50/50 chance of him either never making it out of that swamp alive or marrying the figure that was creeping out from under the distant willow tree in a black cocktail dress. The third time she found him trussed up in one of her traps, he complimented her rope work and asked if she'd like to go out sometime after his head wound stopped bleeding.

Or while it was still bleeding.

If she was into that.

Some kids and a mysteriously burnt down Piggly Wiggly later, their love is still as strong and inescapable as a bear trap in a sink hole.

Carlisle Guillermo (now Addams through marriage but I wanted to give him two first names for a name since Gomez has two last names) makes a vaguely described living practicing ‘law’ around town. A loophole king, people come to him from miles around with contracts signed in blood, fights over chunks of hair buried in their rivals’ yard, dehydrated primate hands, memories that seemed like dreams until the evidence of their happenings became too real, and other regular Legal Items asking for counsel which he is all too happy to give. For a price. Sometimes that price is a homemade pie and sometimes it’s a million dollars, depends on who you are. Whatever you’re asked to pay it’s worth that price, and if you try to scam him out of work or he just plain doesn’t like you? Well. He knows how to twist a contract better than anything at the crossroads.

And he always gets his due.

He doesn’t just serve the local (living)humans though, there are many things that need proper legal representation in this day and age. You wouldn’t believe how many city councils try to build on sacred burial grounds even after he lets them know that his ghostly clients are totally gonna haunt the FUCK out of the ensuing shitty condos and curse their families for all eternity. At least 50% of his energy goes towards dealing with real estate bullshit.

Carl is an excitable and good natured(?) man who loves his family, cigars, dancing, and his many knife-based hobbies. People find him very charming once they get past the feeling that they’re talking to a sultry gator badly disguising itself as a human. I didn’t put a ton of deep thought into designing him, mostly I wanted to make a middle aged dude who looked like he would have been voted ‘most likely to smooch the literal devil’ in high school. Tbh he probably has, but no demonic ex’s can compare to his lovely wife~

Mortesha Addams(her name was already perfect so I just tweaked it)is a woman of many talents. A self proclaimed homemaker, she prides herself on a greenhouse full of Concerning Foliage, a beautiful wasp apiary, and a coop full of what are probably chickens that she keeps for what are probably eggs. She’s also an avid creator of the outsider art that can be seen around the estate. She has taken on the family business of selling her homemade goods in a little stall by the road just outside the swamp with her mom, and makes pretty good money doing so. A surprising amount of poison gets bought in quaint southern towns.

Speaking of poison, people who come out to the edge of the swamp to buy it are usually carrying a lot of secrets around, and Mortesha knows most of them. It’s not like she pries the truth out of people, it just so happens that many nervous hellos eventually turn into the tragic backstory power hour if she’s alone with a client for long enough. She supposes that’s just how people are. Despite the fact that the Addams are very active in the community (whether the community likes it or not) she especially, as a direct descendant of the first Addams matriarch, is seen as…Well not an outsider because the community feels A Certain Way about outsiders and despite it all the Addams are their people, but maybe something like an exception. They feel like whatever weirdness they’re hiding can’t be weirder than any given Addams, so they get a little loose with their words.

This is amusing to her, since Addams’ don’t naturally keep the kind dramatic secrets that their surface level prim and proper neighbors do. It’s much more fun to openly talk about those things.

Do they have a sadly decrepit yet terrifying grandma up in the attic? Yeah, like three. They got a tv, all the creepy porcelain dolls they could want, and they’re close to family. Where do you keep your gram-grams?

Any bodies buried on the property? Yeah some, but most are thrown to the gators.

Any creeping through the balmy summer night with ill intentions? Yeah dude, everyone loves a nice family stroll.

What about dangerous forbidden love? If an adult Addams isn’t incorporeal then they’re either queer or in a torrid romance with some person/thing mysteriously drawn to that awful swamp. Sometimes both at the same time. Most times actually.

Mortesha would know.

The current head of the Addams family is just as outgoing as her husband but a lot quieter and harder to read. She never really seems to get mad about much and always has a genteel smile for everyone whether they deserve it or not. A seven foot tall human shaped “Oh, bless your heart”. A perfectly composed Lady even when she’s, oh I dunno, burning down a Piggly Wiggly. You know. A regular southern mom. Chat her up at the hair salon for 50% off a jar of wasp honey with your next purchase of a mysterious but foreboding packet of herbs.

Designing her was pretty easy because I just drew a lankier Grace Jones and called it a day. I had some problems with her outfit simply because if we were going HARD southern gothic then she’d probably be wearing a white/cream dress with a fuller skirt but I thought keeping the silhouette and the black was more important. She’s supposed to be an anti southern gothic southern gothic character anyway. A woman who looks like she has a million secrets who is actually the most open person you could meet. For better or worse. The red hair came from a coloring error that I really ended up liking (my mom had red hair her whole childhood that only darkened up in high school so I can buy that an Addams can be naturally fire engine red) and the veil was to get more of that classic Morticia silhouette in there.

The Children

Sunday and Blanche are the twin children of Carlisle and Mortesha Addams. Some say the Addams clan got their cursed homestead when a wealthy local businessman made a deal with the devil and lost, leaving his grand mansion to his least favorite maid and cutting his losses once he realized that the swamp would do everything it could to drag the house into the water and take what was owed with its horrible curse. Others say that the family has just always squatted there and no one really cares because man, fuck that particular swamp. Have you been in there? Absolute horror show.

Anyway.

Blanche is the more outgoing sibling and quite the engineer/mad scientist in the making. He started going grey at 2 weeks old but considering he was also rocking some extra fingers, toes, and a tiny tail (he takes after his dad), his parents just put it on the 'not life threatening' pile and decided not to worry about it. He's the kind of smart that teachers find utterly infuriating, less a dog eagerly learning and obeying commands and more a hyena who keeps teaching itself how to pick locks. He has a few friends in his school's robotics club (which they honestly allowed him to make so the school could contain his... creations) but mostly hangs out with his sister exploring the swamp. They find all sorts of neat things in there! wedding rings, suspiciously lumpy garbage bags, cloaked cultists who can't read private property signs, it's an adventure every day!

Blanche is all about experimentation with his creations, his look, and his tether to this mortal coil. Is lipstick a cool thing to try? Let's find out. Can he get out of a strait jacket fast enough after being pushed into the depths of the swamp by his sister? let's find out. He's not dead yet and confused local doctors can attest to the fact that he's rarely attained more than a bad bruise so he's pretty set on continuing to kiss rattlesnakes on their cute little heads and have his sister practice her knife throwing at him until that fact changes.

Blanche is very much a country goth. Cowboy boots (customized by his mom), knife, and lighter are daily accessories. He likes to wear the crusty swamp jewelry they find (the rust adds a splash of color!) and despite appearances he does try to keep himself neat. He's just got natural Grunge Colors and a tendency to wear clothes he likes until they fall apart. Pugsley always seemed the most modernly styled to me (which might just be because little boys clothes have been the same for a long time) so I wanted Blanche to be the most purposely fashionable Addams. Everyone else is goth by nature, but he's the only one truly familiar with goth as an alternative fashion.

I got really into designing Blanche because honestly, I find Pugsley to be the most boring member of the family. And he was hard to design! I had to mess with his vibe a lot to get him looking how I wanted. I know he's supposed to evoke an " 'evil' little boy next door who's parents never reign him in", but that's just goth Dennis The Menace. I's 2020. We can at least go queer goth Calvin.

Sunday was much easier to design. Wednesday was my favorite as a child (of course) and I really wanted to keep the spirit of her look while adding things like billowy sleeves (it gets HOT down here), big poofy twists instead of braids, and a nice tie. She's a professional after all, been running the local pet cemetery since she was 6 and the previous groundskeeper met with an unfortunate accident after telling her that tarantulas don't have souls. Her specialty is creating beautiful naturalistic animal funerals similar to those that Maquenda (https://linktr.ee/artofmaquenda) makes, and she takes pride in creating miniature dioramas of her subjects after each burial which she uses as a kind of 3D catalog for future clients.

She really wants to try out her skills on humans one day. Well. Publicly try out her skills. Lotta random bodies float into the swamp. None of them have turned down her requests for diorama models so far. Most seem downright flattered. Plus, she usually figures out which graveyard/crime scene they floated over from and gets her parents to give them a lift back. She'll even help enact terrifying revenge from beyond the grave on whoever put them there if she's not, y'know, busy.

Besides arts, crafts, and pet based funerary arrangements, Sunday is an avid lover of archery (any ranged weapon really), books where little fantasy adventure animals die dramatic deaths, and history. She is That Kid who eagerly raises her hand when asked who Christopher Columbus was and ends up being sent out of class after 15 minutes for making 'a scene'. Her favorite party trick is just picking an item in the room and talking about how it relates to either some obscure historical figure with a buck wild life or a horrible disaster. At least one charity pancake breakfast ended with children in tears after her vivid description of the Great Molasses Flood of 1919.

Social-wise, while Wednesday is the girl that people ask to smile because they think she'd, "look so pretty", Sunday is rarely asked anything at all. People just kind of assume from her quiet nature (in between horrible history facts) that she's angry all the time and that she hates everyone. This is untrue. She hates some people but she's ambivalent to most everyone else and even downright friendly if you bother to talk to her like a person instead of a terrifying cryptid. Like, she IS a terrifying cryptid but she's also a little girl.

That’s about it for now. One day I might do the other family members but for now I’m happy with the four I’ve redesigned. Making an au! Lurch in a family that doesn’t do butlers could be interesting. Over on patreon I put forth that he could just be Motesha’s mute little brother (similar bone structure) but Amy Crook had the nice idea of quote: “ a mysterious "cousin" that "helps around the house" whose origins are both long in the past and faintly unsettling. He's good for lifting heavy things, like that tank of propane you're about to throw into the burning Piggly Wiggly... “ which i now consider canon. Who's kid is he? How old is he? Not important. Anyone willing to commit arson with you is family.

Annnnyway. This challenge was a lot of fun! I love indulging in AU’s.

#long post #the addams family #Character Design #au #design challenge #i am incapable of doing a design challenge like a normal person #oh god i forgot the cut lol

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tooweirdforyou · 4 years ago

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How The OP Boys Say “I Love You” To Their S/O

How You Know He Loves You- idk man

A/N : enjoy.

includes » Ace, Sabo, Luffy, law, Sanji, Zoro, Marco, Rosinante, Kid, Shanks, Mihawk, Katakuri, Izo, Koby, Cavendish,

Summary : the boys’ own way of saying “I love you”, with their own words and ways. Or, how you know he loves you.

? Wait did I do this before? I don’t even know. also these aren’t GREAT, but they aren’t HORRIBLE. Yk? Honestly tho, some of these seem like they’re all over the place, which yes, they might be. UGH IT WAS SO HARD THO.

Monkey D. Luffy

Luffy loves you like an adventure. Everything is new and always fun to try with him, and no matter what happens, you don’t ever regret it, because you’re doing it with him.

He’s persistent in staying with you everywhere, he wants to do everything with you. He tends to invite you ( by pulling your hand ) to do crazy things with him and away from the others so you’re alone.

He’s always showing off his skills and stupidity in order to make you laugh, because your smile is the best thing he’s ever seen and giggles are the beautiful sound he treasures.

His actions are genuine when he holds your hand and pulls you to his side all the time, with the warmest, loving grin.

Luffy always makes sure to remind you to never give up hope.

“Let’s go on an adventure together, [Name].”

Roronoa Zoro

Zoro loves you like you’re his one and only. No one has priority over you, ( except maybe Luffy ), and you will always be his, if you’ll let him.

Zoro is not a man of many words when it comes to his own emotions and feelings, so he shows it through his actions.

He always has an eye on you, so wherever you are is where he ‘sleeps’ so he can keep you close, his swords at his side to protect you from danger, ( but he knows you can handle yourself. )

Zoro is the perfect person to lend a comforting shoulder and ear. He will listen to every single one of your problems intently and if he can, will offer the best advice you’ll hear, even if it’s a bit harshly. However, whatever got you so down, Zoro will bring you back up.

Zoro is always reminding you that you are strong, no matter how tough things get.

“Oi, come take a nap with me. I could use a body pillow.”

Portgas D. Ace

Ace loves you like a gentleman, respecting boundaries, bowing to the elderly you pass by together and always ready to pick you up for your date at seven, bouquet of flowers in hand.

If Ace is good at anything, it’s knowing how to distract you with a good time. He knows the best way to bring a beautiful smile to your lips and can easily make sure to avoid the thoughts that brought you down in the first place.

He’ll share stories that will make you die of laughter or feel so wholesome that you literally melt at how sweet it is.

The few times he expresses and shares his insecurities to you, something he hides within him because he trusts you enough to do so. He loves your understanding and comfort for him.

Ace always reminds you that you’ll be okay, even at the worst times.

“You are the light of my life.”

Chief of Staff Sabo

Sabo loves you like a prince. He holds the door for you, takes your hand so you don’t fall, has the most charismatic smile on his face and is just so charming.

Sabo will remember the littlest things, the smallest details that you yourself don’t even know until he reminds you, and because of this, you are often gifted the most memorable and cherishing gifts, like the scarf you two bought for your perfect snowman, to the necklace you were staring a little too longingly at on display.

He’s always busy, but he doesn’t hesitate to drop whatever he has just for you. He will run through fire if it means you’ll stop crying or if you’ll be happy to see him. You are his lifeline, his soul, his love.

He may not know how to properly cheer you up like his brothers can, but he knows that he wants the best for you. If you need space, you got it. You need some tender loving cuddles and buckets of ice cream while watching Disney movies? Vanilla or chocolate ice cream?

Sabo reminds you that you deserve happiness and peace.

“Whenever you need me, I’ll be there.”

Trafalgar D. Water Law

Law loves you like you’re his savior, someone who’s always there during his time of need and insecurities, by his side when he needs you most.

He’s a little blunt and straightforward occasionally, but he’s honest somewhat. He won’t ever tell you his feelings until he deems it the right time, but you can tell he has feelings by the change in treatment.

He’ll keep you closer to him, making excuses by saying that he needs you to help him with the supply run, or that he needs your assistance with a particular menial task.

He’s awkward and shy about it at first but he cares and that’s all you need to know. Especially once you catch him during one of his weaker times, the anniversary of a particular someone rolling around, where he’s locked in his room. He needs you beside him, so please don’t leave him when he needs you.

Law reminds you that you are human, that it’s okay to be vulnerable.

“Just stay here with me.”

Vinsmoke Sanji

Sanji loves you like a god/goddess. He will treat you with the utmost respect and care and offers you everything you could possibly want or need, just say the word.

His genuine, endless daily compliments are given to you with pure love and passion, his daily refreshments and snacks to keep you energized and hydrated keeps an eye out for your health.

He makes sure you know the true meaning of flattery, chivalry and love, because that is all he can show you.

However, under that chivalrous exterior, is his calmer, understanding loving self, where he shows his true self and when he finally shares this side with you, where he holds his insecurities, it’s the true honor and love you can receive. And it’s even better, when you become the one who loves for him in return during this time.

Sanji reminds you that you deserve to be and are loved.

“You are my world, my everything.”

Marco The Phoenix

Marco loves you like a married couple who grew old together, still playing jokes and having fun to life’s fullest, no matter your age.

He’s constantly lecturing you for the smallest things repeatedly, since you always seem to forget. His lectures lack any annoyance or malice though, he’s just kind of done with you sometimes.

Nonetheless, he’s taking care of you more than you think, always the first one there whenever you need help. He’s always prepared for whatever you need so you don’t have to look for it and get worried.

He’s stern at times but he loves you more than you could ever know, often questioning himself whenever he’s beside you. He half-lidded eyes watching you with warmth and admiration because you always look so determined.

Marco always reminds you that you are free. To live life to its fullest and however you wish.

“Let me fly you to the moon.”

Donquixote Rosinante

Rosinante loves you like a husband, he treats you like his wife, either you or him welcoming each other home after being gone for so long and greeting each other with a loving kiss each time.

He knows just how tough things can be and as much as he tries to make things right, he knows how bad situations really are and no matter how much he wants to cry or get angry, he always holds a smile, in front of you. To assure you that things will be okay.

He gives the warmest hugs, and knows that, so whenever you’re angry or sad, or just randomly at times, Rosi envelops you into a large hug, waddling you back and forth a few times, you feel instant relief and content, which makes him smile.

His priority will always be you, even if he’s hundreds of thousands miles away, he will find his way back home to you. He surprises you with the littlest gifts; being flowers, jewelry, candles, or more.

Rosi will always remind you to smile, even during the hardest times.

“I will protect you.”

Eustass Kid

Kid loves you like a game, it’s unexpected, unpredictable of what will happen and it’s exciting and thrilling. For you both, one wrong move, and the other is gone for good, but perhaps, second chances/rematches are available.

He can be brash and a bit much, but Kid has high respect for anyone who actually makes it onto his crew and can actually tolerate him, you included.

He’s loud and wild but that only makes it part of the fun. With such a short fuse, as long as you play your cards right and pick your moments to bite back, it’s kind of fun knowing how dangerous it can be with a guy like Kid, and he also loves it equally, because your feistiness is attractive.

Being a bad bitch that doesn’t play by the rules is so incredibly attractive and Kid knows how to reward and punish so tread carefully. ;) however, he has his down moments and as annoying he can be, he does appreciate the effort you give if you try to comfort him. He’ll be harsh about it but eventually, he just wants you to be with him in the end.

Kid reminds you to rebel, take risks and enjoy the thrill of getting in dangerous situation every once in a while, breaking a few rules doesn’t hurt anybody. Most of the time.

“Don’t fucking ever leave me.. okay?”

Dracule Mihawk

Mihawk loves you like you’re an empress, only the finest and highest quality for you, nothing else can compare.

Mihawk will buy you the most expensive dress that suits you, with an equally expensive matching jewelry to go with. Not to mention the heels, and, tch, how could he forget the roses you require? Despicable.

As much as he loves to show you off, he despises the stares of awe and admiration you receive whenever you go out, so his possessiveness takes over and he has an arm around your waist at all times, successfully showing you’re taken and to back off if they don’t wish to be cut into oblivion.

He trains you to handle yourself, obviously, you should know at least some basic skills. He’s not too hard on you but does push you to keep going until you truly wish to stop. It’s only because he’s worried that one day, he won’t be there and won’t be able to protect you.

Mihawk reminds you that you are a queen/king, a strong person who shall hold your ground and never back down from fear and show your bravery.

“Come here, mi amor.”

Red Haired Shanks

Shanks loves you like you’re his future. It’s an unknown journey, but he’s there for the ride and whatever may happen, he’s there staying and won’t be going anywhere, unless it’s with you.

The red head is a goofball, he drinks, parties and messes around but he is an incredible captain and genuine to a fault. So when he expresses kindness, it is purely from his heart and not out of manners.

He is extremely playful and yet when down to business, he is calm, collected, and cool. He knows just what to say in tough situations and great comforting advice, so he’s the one to go to when you’re feeling down. And as laid back as he is, disrespect to those he loves is the one shit he won’t take.

He’ll hold you close and with his signature grin, compliment you and tell you how much he appreciates you and as soon as someone lays a finger on you, his hand is on the hilt of the sword and he waits three seconds for an explanation before he cuts them down. No one messes with his beloved.

Shanks reminds you of loyalty. To always protect and care for those close to you, and keep that built up trust and bond you created with them.

“Trust me. I won’t let go of you.”

Charlotte Katakuri

Katakuri loves you like you’re glass, he’s careful, protective, cautious and treats you like you’re fragile, because he’s afraid of hurting you.

He’s larger than most, he’s aware of that, so he always takes the precautions to be aware of his surroundings, especially when you are around. He wants you safe and he will be devastated if he is the cause of your pain.

His large stature is a blessing to you though, because cuddling is so comfortable and comforting, it’s amazing. You can curl up and relax and just be at ease with him, because he’s so protective of you, even from his family members. He often keeps you away from Cracker and Perospero, in the slightest chance that they try to take you away from him.

He’ll be extremely heartbroken if Big Mom doesn’t approve of you, but his love for you is stronger, so he’ll keep it a secret if he has to but eventually, he’ll pray and wish for her blessing, asking the help of his siblings to convince her.

Katakuri reminds you of family, that even friends or crewmates are family and love you all the same.

“I will be here for you.”

Captain Koby

Koby loves you like a typical high school crush. He’s all shy and blushy, and evidently embarrassed when the pretty one at school is talking to him, ( that’s you. ).

He’s like the wallflower type, who tries to blend in but somehow, he sticks out in a way that lures you to him, like he’s hit the jackpot.

He is incredibly sweet, and his shyness is so adorable. You can’t help but coo whenever you see his red cheeks and soft smile of care he offers.

Always helps you with everything, will take the blame whenever you get in trouble, takes the suffering and pain when guys try to mess with you, and no matter how tough things get, he’s holding a brave face for you.

Koby reminds you of kindness, treat everyone with care and kindness, and it goes a long way.

“If you fall, I’ll be there to catch you.”

16th Division Commander Izo

Izo loves you like you’re a painting, he thinks you are true beauty, inside and out, you are a work of art, a true Mother Nature masterpiece born. One to be admired.

The type to be there. He’ll hold your hair while you vomit, rubbing soothing circles on your back while you cry, painting your nails while you complain about Ace, assure your perfection when you’re feeling insecure.

Best advice giver, holds no judgements at all. He’ll help with anything, because you need him. Romantic advice, friendship, sexual advice ;), he will help you any way he can.

He truly admires you, not because of your beauty, but your strength to be able to cry. Crying doesn’t mean weakness but rather, strength to be able to move forward even in the worst of times.

Izo reminds you that you are beautiful, no matter what anyone thinks or says.

“You are true beauty, my love.”

Cavendish Of The White Horse

Cavendish loves you like you’re a princess, and he is your handsome Prince Charming.

Every thing he does it like from a fairytale, if it involved a rather.. bit of a narcissistic Prince Charming. But he means well, because he still treats you like a real princess.

He gives you daily horseback rides, teaching you with his strong arms wrapped around yours and his black fancy hat on top of your head, as you two ride around and share laughs and memories.

And even through his big ego, he still makes sure to compliment you, tell you how proud he is of you and how much he truly admires you for your strong will and determination, because he really does love you. More than you know.

Cavendish reminds you that dreams can come true, sometimes it just takes a leap of faith and effort.

“I will treat you like the princess you are and deserve to be.”

A/N : 15 fucking people and having to think of different things while I’m distracted is so HARD. 😭 please tell me you enjoyed though ;-;

but did I do this already? God I can’t remember a thing, especially since I still haven’t updated my masterlists- and I’m terribly sorry if this really is all over the place ;-; also apologies if this is repetitive for some of them! It really is difficult yk ;-;

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bumbleklee · 3 years ago

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the first week

masterlist | 1k prompt masterlist | baby series

pairings: diluc, kaeya, childe and zhongli x female!reader (separate)

warnings: babies

before i officially start the series: if you would like to be on a tag list for this series please let me know! i didn't make one for the pregnancy series because it slipped my mind but i noticed a lot of the same people returning lol. secondly, quite a few people have sent me family/baby requests but instead of making them totally separate parts, im just going to add them into this series! so if you get a tag from me, your request is in the prompt somewhere (ex: @dragontamereg for khanreiah eyes) ♡( ◡‿◡ ) enjoy

diluc

If you thought one baby was difficult, try two.

And it didn’t help that you were still exhausted from the birth. Diluc felt like he was going into overdrive between tending to you and his new children. The first week felt like a never ending cycle of feeding, changing, bathing and sleeping.

Neither of you tried to be in a bad mood, but the sleepless nights and fatigue were catching up faster than you anticipated.

You had just laid down when Clara started to whine in the bassinet next to your bed. Her cries woke up Isaac and soon both babies were fussy. Your eyes pried open and you leaned over to rock the bassinet, shushing the newborn.

Diluc groaned next to you and sat up. He had dark bags under his eyes and his hair was frizzy and messy from not being able to shower in a few days.

“Can you calm Isaac down?” You asked tiredly, lifting Clara up and bringing her over to the bed.

“Why can’t you? I thought we said we would take turns,” He grumbled, though he was already getting out of bed and walking to the other side. You rolled your eyes and rocked Clara in your arms, brushing your finger against her soft tuft of hair.

“Because this isn’t something we can take turns at, Diluc,” You snapped back.

He sighed and climbed back into bed, Isaac now in his arms. The room was silent except for the occasional whines and noises from the babies. You had come to the conclusion that they just liked to wake you up for fun.

After a while, you turned your head to the side and melted at the scene. Isaac was laying on top of Diluc’s chest and they had both fallen asleep. Diluc’s mouth hung open and the baby snuggled into his warmth. You reached over to brush a lock of hair out of Diluc’s face, “My boys,” You said quietly.

At your touch, Diluc jolted awake. He was careful not to disturb Isaac, “Did I fall asleep?”

“You did,” You said, the ghost of a smile on your face. You put both babies back into their respective bassinets and Diluc lifted the blanket so you could slide next to him. “I don’t want to argue.”

“Me either,” Diluc agreed, wrapping his arms around you, “It’s just the first week. I’m sure it’ll get much easier.”

kaeya

To say Kaeya was attached to your daughter was an understatement. When you weren’t feeding her, Kaeya was tending to her. He held her close to him every chance he got, even offering to change and bathe her so you could sleep.

And he was so, so gentle with her. He didn’t know it was possible to love someone so much. You had gotten into the habit of just watching Kaeya. You didn’t know if you were ever going to have another child one day, so you treasured these moments like diamonds.

“Kaeya? The shower’s open,” You called out, twisting water out of your hair and wrapping a towel around yourself. When you didn’t get an answer, you raised an eyebrow. You changed into clean clothes and poked your head into the hallway to see the light to the nursery was on. “Kae?”

You poked your head into the nursery and stopped in the doorway, a smile creeping onto your tired face.

Calla laid on the changing table with Kaeya hovering above her. She barely kicked her feet, something she was just learning to do, and Kaeya struggled to get her legs into her onesie. “Come on, Princess,” He pleaded, tickling the bottom of her feet. Calla made a noise and Kaeya took the opportunity to dress her finally.

Once he lifted her up, he noticed you standing in the doorway. “Very cute,” You said softly, teasing Kaeya. Your husband smiled proudly.

“How was your shower?” He asked, looking for a pacifier to give to Calla.

“It was nice. You can take one now if you want,” You said. Kaeya looked down at Calla and hesitated. “I promise she’ll be here when you get out.”

You took Calla from Kaeya and brought her into your bedroom. After feeding her, you held her in your arms and she stared at you with wide eyes. Like Kaeya, she had his unique star pupil. Neither of you knew that was something that could be passed down but Kaeya was beyond shocked that it was. He wished she didn’t have it, saying something about how it didn’t represent her, but you liked it.

Calla yawned and you laid her beside you in the bassinet, rocking it before she fell asleep. Kaeya joined you in bed a little while later and rubbed his face against your shoulder, “I’ll grab her the next time she wakes up.”

“How did I get stuck with someone so wonderful?” You asked, throwing your head back. Kaeya shrugged and kissed your forehead before snuggling close to you. His eyes never left the bassinet.

childe

You didn’t know what to expect during the first week of Nikolai’s life but it definitely wasn’t a shower of gifts from your boyfriend. It seemed that everyday you woke up, there was something new on the bedside table.

“Childe, what are these for?” You finally asked after unboxing a designer dress that in no way would fit you now.

Your boyfriend poked his head into the bedroom, a coffee mug in one hand and Nikolai snuggled securely in his other arm. “Just some thank you presents,” He said casually, as if he wasn’t dropping thousands of mora with each gift.

“For what?”

Childe smiled softly and came into the bedroom, putting down his mug and climbing onto the next next to you. “For giving me this little guy,” He said quietly, “I’ll be eternally grateful.”

Your cheeks grew warm, “You helped too, you know.”

“I didn’t have to go through nine months of pregnancy and hours of labor, though.” Childe caressed Nikolai’s cheek and the baby’s eyes fluttered closed. “Do you think he knows we’re his parents yet?”

You stopped examining the dress to peer at your boyfriend, “Of course he does. You’re his father.”

“Yeah, but, you have a better bond with him. I’m just on the outside.”

You sighed and reached out to hold your hand over Childe’s, “He knows you just as well as he knows me, Ajax. You’ve been in his life as much as I have and you’ve been singing to him, talking to him and loving him. He adores you.”

Your words made Childe smile softly. Nikolai stirred in his sleep and Childe adjusted him in his arms. He was so small, so delicate, and Childe would never let anything or anyone harm him.

You snuggled back into the covers, exhausted from being a new mother, and Childe didn’t leave your side. “Thank you for the gifts,” You mumbled, your face half squished in a pillow.

“Oh, they aren’t done just yet.”

zhongli

Because of your traumatic experience in labor, Zhongli was being extra precautious with you. He didn’t like when you left the bed, even to use the restroom or grab the baby, and would much rather bring Jia to you when it came time to feed her.

The help was nice for the first few days since you were exhausted and sore but as time went on, you became ansty to just be a mother. It wasn’t like Zhongli was holding you back on purpose - he was just horrified that you weren’t yet healed from your traumatic experience and something could happen while you were up and about.

So when Zhongli ran to the store and left you home alone with Jia sleeping in the bassinet, you took this as your opportunity. Gently waking up the sleeping baby, you lifted your daughter into your arms. She snuggled into your warm embrace and slowly, and somehow calmly, woke up.

You bathed Jia yourself for the first time since she was born and afterwards, carried her to the nursery to change her into warm pajamas. For the first time all week, you were starting to feel like a mother.

“Why are you up?”

A voice broke you out of your trance and you looked up to see Zhongli standing in the doorway. He wasn’t mad, just worried, and his voice expressed that.

“You can’t hold me hostage in bed forever,” You said, picking Jia up and resting her securely in your arms.

“But what if it’s too early for you to do strenuous activity?” He questioned, frowning a bit.

You rolled your eyes, “Taking care of my daughter isn't a strenuous activity.” You stepped closer to Zhongli so you could reach a hand up and cup the side of his face, “Besides, I’m feeling much better.”

Zhongli leaned into your touch, “You’ll tell me if you need a break, right?”

“Of course I will.”

You made your way to the loveseat in the corner of the nursery and you sat down in it, enjoying the change of scenery from the bedroom for once. Zhongli’s eyes softened at the sight of you with the baby and he went to leave the room. Before he stepped out, he turned his head over his shoulder and said, “I’m proud of you.”

#diluc x reader #kaeya x reader #childe x reader #zhongli x reader #genshin x reader #genshin family #genshin baby #genshin writing #genshin headcanons #genshin x female reader

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amazingphilza · 4 years ago

Text

twitchcon :: cc!multiple x reader

fluff , platonic , gender neutral ! some mcyt headcanons if you were to attend twitchcon w them

cc’s included in order: tommyinnit , tubbo , ranboo , wilbur soot , philza , technoblade

cw: kinda lengthy for the minors (i think), not as much for the hags LMAO /hj

tommyinnit

this man is so excited to be at his first twitchcon & being able to hang out with all his best friends makes it a hundred times better

when he isn’t at a panel or doing meet & greets, he’s dragging you everywhere to see the whole convention center (clingyinnit)

he is just so at awe despite this not being his first convention to attend

you’d be surprised he gets tired pretty quickly & stops over to the partner lounge

you both rest for a bit against a wall in a pretty packed hallway despite it being an exclusive area to twitch partners

every time a famous streamer walks by he will yell it out and record it then vlog your reaction, even if they’re surrounded with bodyguards & trying to get to another place quickly

he’d zoom in his camera to their face at a horrible angle and be like

“oh my god it is THE ninja. ninja famous fortnite player, HELLO.”

but he gets completely ignored

then the camera pans out to you, still really zoomed in that the capture is blurry

“ninjainnit?”

“EH?”

tommy is so confused, forgetting the bit ninja did on his twitter where he renamed himself ‘ninjainnit’ for a split second

okay tommy isn’t that athletic but he will chase you and the rest of your group down a hallway if he had to

he’d probably find a toy gun from the artist alley/seller booths and shoot you and wilbur with it

but if tommy stumbles across any of the dream team, it’s about to be minecraft manhunt but irl

and he will def play his stream music while walking or smth when he’s bored (or trying to jump dream & sapnap)

** DO DO DO DO MANHUNT MUSIC **

oh my god,, now thinking about it he’s probably the one to open like random doors of empty rooms and steal stuff while you film him

like he will take a random empty glass, a bunch of pens, a freebie t-shirt, everything he sees he takes with him and you’re just panic

“tommy we’re literally not supposed to be here, and i’m stuck here filming you. it’s surely a felony in action”

“well, it’s their fault for leaving the doors open! plus this is great content. who’s the dirty crime boy now, HM?”

you’d tell wilbur about this and he’d scold tommy and threaten him with the same pen tommy stole

tommy probably would also drag you some weird event happening outside twitchcon along with tubbo and ranboo

“pokimane is giving out free pizza to everyone if we go to this one restaurant down the street!”

“we are literally gonna get bombarded. have you forgot you’re like three of twitch’s top streamers? i’d rather pay for all of our meals than try getting free pizza from pokimane against all her other fans”

“DEAL! let’s go to five guys then!”

you unfortunately end up paying for all 3 of their meals and picking on their food instead of buying your own

even with all of them making way more money than you, they still happen to be cheapskates

OR tommy will end up getting a burrito from a taco truck, immediately making a mess of himself, then proceed to complain how messy the food is to eat despite knowing what he was getting himself into before even ordering

“shit my clothes are all ruined now!”

“well that’s your fault you got a burrito, as if it’s your first time having one”

“i mean the food is good, i’m not complaining about that but i don’t think it’s that good that it’s worth costing my red and white shirt, im just saying”

tubbo

same with tommy, he is so excited

i don’t know why but i imagine him overpacking his suitcase and you making fun of him for it

anyway tubbo has his irl backpack on and streaming EVERYTHING

probably spends a lot of time at a bunch of different booths, checking out all the pointless gadgets he could buy for his stream

you’re the one to stop him from doing so

“TUBBO IT’S LITERALLY OVER TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS, STOP. DONT GET IT.”

“WHY NOT?? IT WILL BE COOL FOR MY STREAM AND I WILL USE IT EVERYDAY”

“okay theoretically speaking, how the hell are you going to even bring it home? which—let me remind you—is across the country for you and not to mention the giant ocean separating america and the uk”

“free ship-pang!!!”

“i hate to break it to you tubbo but there is no way you can get free shipping on a FIVE FOOT PC. it’s nearly as tall as you! what are you even gonna do on it, hack the government???”

the arguments are all lighthearted but eventually you give in and let him splurge over a thousand dollars in different devices he claimed he “needed”

i could honestly see him visiting the beaches in san diego and going for a swim or even renting out a boat to use for a bit :D

also he’d bring benson along with him and taking a bunch of scenic photos with it in them

i have a feeling he’s the type to schedule a spontaneous meet & greet because he was bored & gets in trouble for causing a mob in a certain part of the convention

he’s like “oh god, i did not expect this many of the bois to show up AHAHAH oops”

tubbo would def pull a lilypichu and bring his melodica or ukulele and play themes while following random people/cosplayers

at the end of the day, you’d find his bag just stuffed with crap he either got for free or bought in the convention

“how did you get all that stuff? i was with you all day??? and it’s only the first day of the convention, hello?? it looks like you’ve been collecting as if twitchcon has went on for a week already!”

“HA i have my ways, do not underestimate my powers”

lani would probably tag along for the vacation honestly

like whenever someone comes up to her giving her gifts/asking for pics, you and tubbo would tease her about how famous she is

and i dunno but something about tubbo just gives me this amusement park energy and going to legoland and spending the whole day there since it’s near by and because he can

ranboo

he is like a beacon in a sea of people, that’s it .

i honestly just see him causing as much chaos as the other two

ranboo would probably like take someone’s camera whether if they’re streaming or if it’s for the vlog, hold it up high, and point the camera directly above someone’s face

it did not matter how tall you were and if you had platform shoes on, ranboo was a skyscraper next to you

“HAHAH this is how i see you from this height, this is funny”

then he shows you the vid of the recording of him getting like an aerial view of your face

like you see your nose and all your pores and just overall a bad angle to be captured in

“OH GOD RANBOO DELETE THAT, ITS HORRIFIC”

i dunno why but i feel like he’d jump scare every person that was cosplaying as his minecraft character from behind for some reason

“BOO!”

“ranboo i’m not even remotely dressed as your skin—”

“don’t worry i’m practicing it’s fineee”

“you’re like the height of 2 people combined, i think you will be fine as is. you even intimidated the security at the front”

i feel like if he had his own panel he’d like pull up some undertale song in the middle of it and scare all the people in the crowd

“lore but in real life”

probably would get some matching keepsake with you from artist alley/the booths!

i could imagine like a cute keychain or smth :D

i feel like he’s the type to like randomly volunteer as a participant for those mini events in a booth thinking it would be funny but regrets it the moment he’s on stage

after introductions the presenter is like “okay ranboo, you will be given a random meme prompt above your head you won’t be able to see until after and you will have to make a random face to compliment it!”

and you can just tell by his facial expression he’s just thinking

oh god what have i gotten myself into

what is this game? who came up with this idea?

you’d laugh at him the whole time, even after he’s off the stage and finished with that small fiasco

“that was horrible. never again.”

“AHAHAH IT LOOKED SO AWKWARD YOU DID GREAT”

“I CROSSED MY EYES AND PUFFED MY CHEEKS BECAUSE I COULDNT THINK OF ANY OTHER FACIAL EXPRESSION. THE PROMPT ENDING UP BEING ‘WHEN TWITTER CANCELS YOU FOR USING PLASTIC STRAWS.’ AND WHEN I SAW WHAT IT WAS—LITERALLY WHAT KIND OF GAME–”

“I GOT PICTURES AND EVERYTHING ITS PERFECT AHAHAHAH”

wilbur soot

honestly with wilbur it’s slightly more chill

he already experienced twitchcon before so he’s just glad to see his friends again after so long

insists that you explore the convention yourself rather than sticking with him the whole time but you do anyway!

wilbur would probably have like a mini concert and gets you front row seats with the rest of the group

but that doesn’t mean before it that you’re not helping him set up

“y/n please– my amp is so heavy, i can carry it”

“don’t worry! i’m strong” :D

and musically talented or not, he will probably bring you and the rest of his friends up to stage to just vibe and sing a bunch of random acoustic songs

it’s not like some big concert hall stage,, i imagine more like a casual thing w a slightly higher platform from the ground yk?

after spending a long day at the convention he’d also bring everyone across the city to la jolla or smth !

you’d all probably have dinner there and chill, watching the pretty sunset

“this place is really pretty but oh my god im gonna lose my breath hiking up this stupid hill, please slow down”

and wilbur is like ??? because he’s completely fine with his long legs and everything

“just walk faster”

“no, you walk slower”

AHAHAH and for context traversing through la jolla by walking around the town is a bit hard since it’s basically on a bunch of hills (walking up from the beach to a restaurant actually is actually sm work, trust me ive been there)

wilbur honestly doesn’t spend that much time in the actual convention center, he’s probably sightseeing a bit of san diego with you instead

but i could imagine him staying at the tabletop games area playing dnd or smth

“c’mon y/n, come join!”

“uhh i’m not sure, i’m not the best at roleplay and...”

“it’s fine don’t worry!”

he’d pull you in with him and end up enjoying yourself even if it was your first time

and if you’re of age, you’d be wilbur’s +1 at the twitch partner party and make sure mans doesn’t too drunk

if it’s not too late in the night, you two would chill at the beach after the party

it’s just a nice, calming moment after all the loud music mixed with hundreds of conversations at the party

also something about like taking polaroids pictures with wilbur just seems to go hand in hand for me

i’m not sure why but you will be taking lots of pics with wilbur for sure (not necessarily you both in the photo, but of sceneries as well while you’re together!)

philza

literally a dad on vacation with his children, it doesn’t matter how old you are

need sunscreen? surprisingly has it

want a snack? probably has a small granola bar somewhere in his bag

but same with wilbur, he’s more chill like this isn’t his first time at twitchcon

omg he’d def bring you to the artist alley and just buy a bunch of fanart and stuff tho

“oh wow look phil, someone made a giant poster of the dream smp and shit!”

“holy shit that’s so good what the fuck!”

and he’s like rushing to that artist’s stall to buy a poster or print

idk why but phil seems like the person to know where he’s going all over the convention center

he probably had a copy of the directory map but yk

you just have trouble reading it bc all the signs seem to be misleading to you

nothing really crazy screams out to me of what phil would do at twitchcon besides like go to a few events, spend a bunch of time w his friends, etc

HOWEVER i could see him wasting a lot of his time at the gaming area and testing new games that are currently on the works of being developed

like “woah y/n, this vr game is sick, you should try it out!”

ngl i feel like phil would plan a visit to disneyland for everyone, like he gets the tickets and everything but once you’re at the park it’s free reign, y’all go everywhere with not much of a plan

the minors would try to cheap out phil and pay less than the others even though everyone else fully paid phil back and everything LMAO

ok but if he’s feeling nice, phil will buy everyone cotton candy/pretzels :D

and if you’re not hungry, he’d at least get you a mickey balloon

HE WILL HAVE MATCHING MICKEY EARS WITH MUMZA YES .

ALSO STAYING FOR THE FIREWORKS THOUGH OMG

just in general, best idea phil had for taking everyone to disneyland :D

technoblade

surprisingly techno is really calm despite this being like one of his first conventions

but when he finally settles in and gets comfortable, he’s showing the same energy

if you’re playfully yelling, he will yell back

however there’s still those awkward moments that are unavoidable

idk why but something about him makes me think that if you feel tired and want to go back to your hotel room, he’d go with you just to make sure you get there safe

he probably also needs a break from being around everyone else for a moment too LMAO

i could also see him searching far and wide in the artist alley for fanart of himself AHAHAH

walking around with him in the convention consists of someone yelling “BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD” every 5 minutes but you don’t really mind

something about him makes me think he’ll be forced into playing minecraft twitch rivals along with the rest of sbi or smth

and he’s like “oh god, i’m going to be on stage? and people will see my face while i play minecraft?”

“i’m sure it will be fun!”

“i mean i like being competitive and feeding my ego, but i’m not that desperate.. well”

do i imagine techno getting easily tired of being surrounded by a bunch of people and just going back to his hotel room with phil and watching some anime with him? yes

and will you watch even if you have no idea what’s going on? also yes

i feel like after a while of you guys hanging out in techno’s room, the rest of the gang will just slowly join you guys

like eventually everyone is there; you, techno, phil, wilbur, niki, tommy, tubbo, ranboo, etc

and techno is like “wha– where did you guys come from?” because his room is basically packed

and niki could be like “oh we can go if you want!”

then techno just insists that she’s fine “but who let the child get in?” clearly implying tommy’s presence

“OI!!”

eventually techno gives in with the company and someone gets a bunch of board games to play from the front desk

lots of yelling and laughing for sure

when it becomes late at night, techno is like half conscious, you’re on your phone, wilbur is staring out the window & enjoying the night view, tommy is passed out on the couch from tiredness, tubbo & ranboo is still wide awake quietly talking, and phil & niki are helping clean up the giant mess

eventually everyone brings themselves to go back to their own room except tommy who won’t budge

you give techno a look and he immediately understands what you were thinking

he rushes to the bathroom to fill up two cups with ice cold water and handed one to you

“on three?”

“okay.. one”

“two”

“three!”

then both of you pour the water on the poor child’s face

he jolts awake and saying a string of curses

“what the fuck techno? y/n too?”

“get out” is the only think techno says that before tommy rushes out with his stuff and you leave right after

a/n: i honestly can’t wait until conventions open up again though,, phil and ranboo were talking about vidcon earlier and omg.

also i kinda want to take in tommy requests but i’m not sure??? it would be both cc! and c! x gn!reader for sure tho. i love writing him to bits but who knows, maybe i’ll only stick to my ideas,, or not. send in a tommy x reader request, might do it, might not, but he’s my fav cc if you can’t tell so! :D (i dunno if i will keep it strictly platonic, but unrequited crushes and stuff are fun to write hehe,,)

edit: let’s hope i fixed all the grammar mistakes LMAO we love writing late at night :) /s /hj

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lubdubsworld · 3 years ago

Text

The Devil’s own.

Jungkook x OC

Mafia Au!

Warnings : Non-Con ! Manipulation, Degradation, Shitty hero with no redeeming Qualities you have been warned. ( i mean he does get better but not much.)

Summary : Just Mob Boss Jungkook doing mob boss things.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

I wasn’t sure how long I stayed there , staring at the ceiling and trying to come to terms with what had just happened. It was revolting. It was nauseating. It made me want to claw my own skin off. I stared at the intricate designs , carved into the ceiling, the panels that reflected life and made the room seem bigger than it was. The scent of jasmine and rosemary clung to the sheets and the drapes in the room, cloyingly sweet and meant to arouse the occupants.

I wondered how I’d got here.

I had memories of satin silk sheets and bright lights. My father had always spoiled me, the best of the best only for his only daughter and I’d indulged in luxury to my heart’s content. More shoes than I could possibly wear in a life time. Every season’s collection, straight into my wardrobe whether I asked for it or not. Diamonds and rubies and emeralds set in platinum and gold , jewelry to match my clothes and even my car if I felt like it.

I shut my eyes in despair. I didn’t miss the luxury as much as I missed the solitude. The option to just not do anything. My father hadn’t cared enough to see what I was upto and everyone knew that I was betrothed to Jungkook.

And that meant no dates or party invites because after the third guy got his arm in a sling after accidentally brushing past me , word kind of spread. Stay away from Elena Gong or the Jeon kid will break your bones.

I shuddered. It had been an obsession, I thought vacantly.

Jungkook had been obsessed, even back then. I just hadn’t paid much heed to him. Because Jungkook back then had been terrifying but also ridiculously endearing in some way. He had seemed for lack of a better word…..insignificant. I was beautiful and rich, never lacked for attention and he was just one among the dozens. Even if I was betrothed to him, I hadn’t given much thought to him.

And Jungkook had taken my indifference in stride. He’d laughed and played around and I hated to admit it, treated me like a queen. Flowers, chocolates and gifts every other day . He would follow me around like a puppy , and I wondered if perhaps my dismissive attitude towards him back then had been a mistake. Did it push him over the edge?

My heart ached fiercely and when I finally willed myself to move, my body protested.

Every inch of me was sore and aching. My head because of how hard he’d gripped my hair. I sat up on shaky legs, fingers trembling as I pulled my shit up to stare at my body. Bite marks littered my skin, marring the smooth surface and I felt bile in my throat at the memory of his teeth on me. Finger shaped bruises were beginning to bloom around my thighs and I couldn’t breathe over the agony ripping up my insides.

I glanced down between my thighs, at the sticky mess of his release dripping down into the sheets, staining the sheets a murky pink. I shuddered, disgusted. God, I hated him. Where was my phone? My clothes were still there at the foot of the bed and I noticed the small door on the right wall. Crawling off the bed on shaky legs , I limped carefully to the bathroom.

I took Hoseok’s shirt off dropping it in the corner before turning the showers on.

The water felt like a whip on my skin as I sat on the tiled bathroom floor , a small washcloth gripped tight in my hand as I carefully cleaned myself up. I had no idea what the time was… It must be very early or very late. No matter. I had to get out of here and get to Jisoo. I swallowed, imagining her alone all this time. The doctors had said she would be up in Guilt churned as I quickly grabbed a towel from the closet and wiped myself down.

It took me another ten minutes to finish dressing up and just as I finished slipping into my shoes, the door opened. I glanced up, catching sight of Hoseok as he leaned against the door. He looked a little haggard, a black silk shirt unbuttoned to his chest and tucked into fitted jeans. I stared at him, watching the way his gaze roved over every inch of exposed skin, looking just a tad bit worried.

“The Hospital called. “ He said gently, “ They’re ready to release you sister. They want to know if you can come pick her up. The baby’s going to have to stay in the NICU for a couple of weeks.”

I groaned. Great. More bills.

“I need a job. “ I said miserably. “ Help me out.” I stared at him beseechingly and Hoseok gave me a look.

“you know the kind of jobs I provide. You’re not built for it. “ He said shortly and I shook my head, impatient.

“that’s not what I meant and you know it. You and your friends pretty much own every club in the city. Get me a job ….” I whispered, moving to stand in front of him and he recoiled.

Just as always, I thought bitterly. Coward.

As much as a coward now as he’d been ten years ago, when he’d pretended that he didn’t have any feelings for me. Pretended that he didn’t give a damn about me.

The throb in my skull grew in intensity.

My throat was dry and I felt my vision swim a bit. I was tired. Exhausted . I hadn’t slept in….how long really? I hadn’t eaten in a day…for sure… And I likely wasn’t going to be eating for a long while, let alone feeding Jisoo if I didn’t get a job right away. I had twelve thousand won to my name and that was it.

“Jungkook-“ He began but I was sick of his name so I growled.

“Fuck, do you want me to beg Hoseok? I will… I can’t … I need a job… Please.” I said desperately, staring at him and his gaze softened.

“Elena, stop looking at me like that, fuck.” He swore, turning and punching the wall hard. “ fuck.”

“Just help me get a job. I’m not asking you to give me money or something. You don’t even have to get it for me… Just tell me who’s hiring ? Somewhere away from Jungkook and his men.” I whispered , and the sheer irony of it didn’t escape me. Jung Hoseok was possibly one of Jungkook’s main men.

He ran his hand over his forehead, shaking his head.

“You’re going to get me killed someday.” He muttered, “ Fine. There’s a club down in Itaewon. It caters to cops and lawyers exclusively so Jungkook and his men usually keep out of it. My friend owns the place. His name is Im Jaebum. I’ll get you a job there , waitressing. Is that alright?” He said softly and I wanted to sob in relief as I nodded. Itaewon meant pretty close to where the bakery was. I could take the bus.

“Fine. I’ll talk to him and call you. Here…” He held out a wad of cash and I took it greedily, eyes widening at the 100,000 written on the margin of each note. This was a lot of money.

“Hoseok…”I said stunned and he shrugged. “ Get food and baby stuff for Jisoo. If she’s going to feed the baby she needs to eat well. Fruits and veggies and lot of protein. If you run out, tell Jaebum you need some advance. He’ll pay you well.”

I nodded, stuffing the money into my pockets quickly . I swallowed when my insides throbbed, aching something fierce.

“Thank you.” I said softly, staring up at him and he hesitated, before reaching out and gently cupping my face in his palm. I flinched at his touch and he recoiled.

“Was he… Did he hurt you?” He whispered quietly and I smiled bitterly.

“Wasn’t that the whole point?” I sighed, shaking my head . I hesitated . I wasn’t sure if Hoseok would listen to me but I had to try at least.

“ Can you not tell him? That… That I was a virgin?” I asked quietly and he nodded.

“Wasn’t planning to.” He said casually.

I stared at him. I’d always found him handsome. Beautiful. Perfect . And I wondered where we had gone so wrong.

“Do you regret it.” I whispered. “ All those choices you made.”

“Which ones? …” he asked bitterly.

“you know… “ I snapped. “ the ones that lead us here. You and me…. Standing here like strangers. “

“I wouldn’t risk my life for a stranger. Which is what I’m doing every time I help you .” He said quietly.

“So what are we then?” I demanded.

“Old friends” He said casually.

I snorted.

“Fucking coward.” I whispered , loud enough for him to hear as I brushed past him and walked away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I trudged all the way to the VIP room in the hospital flinching because that was probably a lot of money to be repaid , now owed directly to the devil spawn that was Jeon. I had grabbed a small meal on the way before quickly getting the bus to the Hospital. It was little past eleven in the morning and the hallways were packed with people. Sighing, I moved to the room where Jisoo was, slowly opening the door.

Min Yoongi sat on the chair next to the bed, gazing idly at my sister in law.

To say that I was shocked would be the biggest understatement of the century. My lips parted in shock, panic bubbling up inside me as I exhaled sharply.

“What-“ I swallowed gazing between him and my Jisoo, who was sitting up against the backrest on the bed, a tray of food on her lap and a small smile on her face.

“Lena!! You’re here!” She cried out softly, tears filling her eyes at once as she held both her hands up. I moved to hug her but my mind stayed on the man near the bed, his sultry feline eyes trained unblinkingly on her. I wrapped my arms around her, trying to get my breathing to regulate but it was impossible.

What on earth was Yoongi doing here?

“Mr. Min came to see me. He told me he knew Daehwan.” Jisoo said softly, looking sad but hopeful and I felt my heart turn over as I turned to stare at him.

Min Yoongi knew Daehwan as a target . A hit he had carried out himself.

But I couldn’t say a thing. Not in front of Jisoo.

“I’m only here to offer my help. It pains me to see you suffering, Jisoo. I know your husband would want you to be taken care of.” He said softly, his gaze still fixed on her and I didn’t like it. At all.

Bile rising, I gave him a glare.

“I’ll take care of her. Please don’t trouble yourself.” I said shakily and he glanced at me, lips parting a bit, turning into a smirk.

“You look… well rested.” He smirked and I flushed.

“Lena, come on… I know all this…this must be expensive. We can use all the help we can get and Mr. Min-“

“Please call me Yoongi, sweetheart.” Yoongi said charmingly and my sister in law blushed. I felt my skin crawl.

“Y-Yoongi said he has a spare room. I can’t stay in the bakery. And it’s not like he’s a murderer or anything. He showed me his card. He’s a lawyer.” She said softly and I sighed in despair. Jisoo was naïve bordering on stupid and I wasn’t equipped to deal with this.

As I watched she went back to the food, eating ravenously and I felt my heart clench. I could see the twin damp spots at her chest and I noticed the breast pump on the table. It looked brand new. I hadn’t even thought about things she may need after the baby, too preoccupied with all the hospital bills and medicines I would have to pay for.

Diapers. Baby wipes. Those little flannel pieces mothers used to wipe down the baby. I felt my head spin, turning to Yoongi who was staring at me casually.

“Can we talk?” I said quietly and he straightened.

“Jisoo ssi… Please enjoy your meal. And here…” He gave her his phone. “ If you’re done, just give me a buzz on this.” He showed her something on the phone .” Go on try it.”

Jisoo pressed down on the screen curiously and Yoongi’s watch rang .

He grinned as she smiled.

“See? One touch and I’ll be here yeah?” He said softly, and I felt like I was stuck in some kind of drama, glancing between the pair of them.

“Are you leaving?” She asked curiously and he shook his head.

“I’ll be right here, outside. Having a word with Elena. You can finish your food and I’m guessing it’s time for you to pump again? The pediatrician said you’d have to pump every two hours with the milk so… if you get it ready, I’ll drop it off at the NICU.” He said calmly.

Jisoo nodded, staring at him with wide eyed gratefulness and I sighed in despair.

Yoongi moved to the door and I gave her a small smile before following him.

I waited till the door had closed behind me before turning to him, furious.

“What do you think you’re-“

“I want her.” He said shortly.

I felt my jaw come unhinged.

“No.” I hissed, furious and helpless with rage. “ Yoongi-“

“Don’t make me put a bullet in your head for this, Elena.” He said calmly and I exhaled shakily.

“She’s… You know she’s not like us. She doesn’t know anything about this life. As far as she knows my brother was a surgeon who got killed in a hit and run. You want to …. What do you really want? Did Jungkook put you upto this?”

“If Jungkook would have his way, your sister in law and your new nephew would both be dead. You know this.” Yoongi said casually. God, could I ever have a conversation with anyone without Jungkook being dragged into it? When did my life get twined so intimately with him?

“Where is he?” I asked quickly and Yoongi shrugged.

“He’s out of the country. He left an hour ago.”

“Switzerland….” I said before thinking and Yoongi stiffened.

“How did you know?” He demanded and I froze.

“I… I overheard …..someone.” I muttered and Yoongi moved so fast I barely caught it. The next second I was pressed up against the wall, his forearm pressing into my throat and holding me down while he held a knife right against my jugular.

“Nice try. Now the truth.” He hissed.

“Ouch..” I choked out , coughing a bit. “ Fine.. Hoseok.. Hoseok told me.”

Yoongi pulled back.

“You fukcing him?” He asked casually and I glared at him.

“none of your business.” I snapped.

He laughed at that.

“I know you aren’t. Hoseok loves his dick too much to risk having it castrated.”

I sighed, shaking my head. I wasn’t here to talk about these bastards.

“Just leave Jisoo alone.” I said quietly and Yoongi sighed.

“What are you going to do with her, Elena. You can barely afford to feed yourself. You should be thankful I’m taking her off your hands.”

I ignored his nonsense and moved till I was pressed up against him, fingers curling into his chest. Yoongi looked surprised, lips twisting in displeasure when I blinked up at him.

“please.. Yoongi…” I begged, “ Don’t do this to me.” I said quietly. “ I … she’s all I have… She… My brother had nothing to do with any of this. You know that….He left this life decades ago. I don’t… I don’t know why Jungkook wanted him dead in the first place. I loved my brother and my brother loved his wife. I owe it to him … Please…just…Please leave her alone.” I whispered softly, letting my fingers drop to grip his arm.

He tugged his arm away at once.

“ She needs more than empty platitudes and good intentions. She needs food and a place to stay with her baby. I’m giving her that.”

“And what do you get in return?” I demanded angrily. “ She just gave birth, fuck you. You can’t touch her , not unless you’ve lost the last shreds of humanity in that conscience of yours.”

He rolled his eyes.

“I’m not doing this for sex, Elena. If I wanted easy pussy, I would have come to you…” He smirked. “ Don’t forget that Jungkook and I share our toys, yeah?”

I opened my mouth to retort before remembering that I was trying to get him to listen to him.

“Then why? What do you want…tell me?”

“I told you. I want her. As she is.” Yoongi shrugged.

“You killed her husband.” I said , voice shaking as I remembered what Jungkook had said. About my brother begging for his life because Jisoo was pregnant. And how Yoongi hadn’t given a shit and shot him anyway.

“A minor inconvenience. Trust me if I’d seen her before I killed him…” He sighed, shaking his head in regret and I frowned.

“You would have spared him? “ I asked bitterly and Yoongi laughed.

“No.. I would have killed him sooner.” He smirked. “ Is there a point to this whole conversation… I’m getting bored and Jisoo’s waiting inside.”

“We’re supposed to get her out of the hospital today and-“

“I’m taking her home.” He said briskly. “ I’ve already spoken to her. And She’s agreed that a ramshackle , dilapidated bakery isn’t the right place for a new mother and a tiny baby.”

And the worst part was that I couldn’t even disagree.

And I couldn’t help but feel angry, betrayed. Jisoo was…. How could she? She hadn’t even bothered to talk to me about it… Just agreeing to move in with Yoongi. She was older than me. Supposed to be the smart one. My body ached. If that was the bed she was going to make , she could lie on it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Going somewhere?” Jungkook’s voice made me freeze.

I swallowed, straightening and stepping back almost instinctively. He stood in the doorway, a cigarette held between his teeth as he stared at me . He looked like he’d showered as well, hair still damp and the smells of citrus and mint permeating the air around him.

It was exactly ten days since I’d last seen him and I’d settled into a routine of sorts. Im Jaebum’s bar, Venom was an exclusive club in Itaewon and I could easily disappear into the shadows, staying low and using the beret ( a part of the uniform ) to keep my face hidden as I served the patrons. Like Hoseok had said, the place was filled with cops and lawyers. Yoongi was a frequent fixture here , stopping for just a drink on most days before heading home to my sister in law.

It made me sick but there was nothing I could do about it. Jisoo and little baby Yunsu were both home and needed a l,ot of care. And Yoongi apparently had a cook, a housekeeper and a nanny who helped her out. Jisoo was wary, her senses finally returning but she was also clearly glad to be out of the streets.

“I’m going home after I finish my shift. “ I said softly, trying not to stare as he stepped into the room. I turned away from him moving to the shelves and pushing the small canister in place.

“Where’s home?” He asked casually. I flinched when he stepped right behind me, fingers reaching out to curl on my shoulder, pulling me back till I was flush against his chest. The heat of his body seeped in through the thin fabric of my blouse and I felt my body heat up.

“You got what you wanted.” I said shakily. “ Let me go.” I whispered, dropping the cleaning cloth in the tray on the lower shelves, before moving to grab the mop. I just had to finish mopping the floor . And then I could leave.

But his grip on me stayed firm. I couldn’t move. Foreboding rose inside me.

Jungkook hummed at that, stepping closer, till I felt his chin brush the top of my head as he bent over me, arms coming around me and fingers lightly unbuttoning the first two buttons of my shirt. I stared at the dark ink on his forearm. , swallowing as he kept coming closer.

“What I wanted? That pathetic little display ten days ago?” He whispered softly “ Just think about this Elena …… I’ve been chasing you for years, I got rid of your entire family and yet I let you live. Why do you think that was, huh? “ He shook his head, “ For two minutes of you lying underneath me like a frigid bitch? You think that’s what I want Elena? Think I’ll be satisfied with that? ” He laughed.

I stared at the wall in front of me and I couldn’t do this. Couldn’t play this sick game with him. Not when he kept changing the rules . Not when there was nothing left for me to gamble or lose.

“Jisoo. I have to go see her. Just… Just let me go see her. I need to see if she’s alright and then we can talk. ” I whispered. Jungkook smiled, tilting my head to the side with his fingers. I felt the damp press of his lips against my jaw and my skin crawled.

“Don’t worry, Yoongi’s taking care of her.” He whispered softly and I felt my heart turn over in my chest at the reminder. I’d been forced to relent because Yoongi had taken her home to a fully finished and decorated nursery , a closet full of baby clothes for her son and nursing clothes for her. She had been bowled over and when I’d told her to think about the why of it…she’d given me a helpless sort of smile. . As far as she was concerned , Yoongi had been nothing but generous and kind… And she wasn’t going to say no to him because she couldn’t afford to..

“I… he promised me he’d let me see her. And the baby…every day. That was the deal.”

Jungkook laughed.

“I thought I made this clear . You don’t get to make deals with anyone because you belong to me. I get to decide what happens to you. Anytime. Anywhere. Do you need another demonstration , Elena?” His hand moved to my breast, groping the flesh, fingers rough and hard and I whimpered in pain.

“No..” I choked out , eyes widening in terror and he made quick work of the rest of the buttons on my blouse. Junkook hummed, kissing the back of my neck and slowly turning me around in his arms.

“Relax. You don’t have a job. How are you going to feed her and the kid? Yoongi isn’t like me. He doesn’t hold a lot of grudges. And for some reason he seems to have a hard on for your sister in law. He wants to marry her. ” He chuckled and I felt nausea bloom.

“No.. Don’t… Don’t do that to her. She’s not like us. She doesn’t know… She doesn’t have anything to do with this life.” I begged, heart racing at the thought of Jisoo, helpless and scared and alone with a baby , trapped with a fucking assassin. Yoongi killed for a living . That was his job. Jisoo was delicate and sensitive.

“She still needs to eat and live right? With what? He’s feeling particularly generous so he’s taken her home . You don’t have to worry about them anymore… Isn’t that nice?” he smirked and I felt my throat go dry.

I clenched my fists, feeling my breath catch.

“The only person you need to worry about yourself is yourself. Isn’t that how you prefer it anyway? Beautiful selfish Elena who never gave a fuck about anyone but herself. Isn’t that who you truly are, angel?” He smiled.

“Not anyone…. Just you… I don’t give a fuck about you.” I said defiantly, staring right up at him.

Jungkook stared at me and stepped closer, reaching out and running his fingers up and down my cheek. I flinched because he still held the lit cigarette.

“None at all?” He asked curiously, lightly tapping on the end of the cigarette, and I flinched when the hot ash spilled onto my shoulder.

“Did that hurt, baby?” He whispered, leaning in and pressing the cigarette to my lips.” I’m sorry. Breathe in for me.” He stuck the cigarette into my mouth and I pulled away , coughing and disgusted.

I closed my eyes as his free hand went to my wrist, tugging me closer. I stiffened as he wrapped his arms around me, drawing me in till my face pressed against his chest, his body flush against mine, one hand moving back to stroke my back.

“I missed you. You’re terrible at pleasing me but I think…with a little bit of training, you can make me cum… ” He smirked. “ Let’s start with a blowjob, yeah?”

I stiffened.

“No.” I said softly and he smirked, pulling back.

“No?” He asked softly. . I felt my throat go dry in fear as I noticed the way his gaze shifted. I bit my lips to stifle the pain as He carefully pressed the lit end of the cigarette right against the curve of my breast , pressing in for a couple of seconds and pulling away just before the skin began to singe. He glanced up at me, and I blinked through the tears, pain spreading all over my chest at the burn. That would leave a scar, I thought miserably.

“Wrong answer. Try again.” He whispered.

“Go to Hell.” I choked out.

I flinched when his fingers slipped up into my hair, gripping hard. My scalp burned, sharp and insistent and instinct made me grip his wrist, trying to get him off but it was impossible.

“Let me go..” I snapped, glaring at him. God, How I hated him.

“Was I your first??” He whispered, dragging me close enough that his lips brushed my ear. “ Never had a cock before? Was that why you were so fucking tight?”

I bit my lips, glaring at him, defiant and furious. Did Hoseok actually tell him? That two faced snake…. God , why did these fuckers never leave me alone?

“Seokjin hyung told me…Told me he was looking forward to breaking a virgin and that made me think….God, I was the first cock she ever had….” He hummed, looking infinitely pleased.

“Yes. And I got to say… I don’t know what the fuss is about. You couldn’t even make me cum.” I snapped and Jungkook grinned, grip tightening and the other hand moving to curl around my waist, squeezing hard.

“Did I make you bleed from between your legs Elena? Tell me I did….Cause that’s fucking hot. ” He whispered, voice low and gruff.

Jungkook, I thought vacantly, was a psychopath.

“Go to Lisa. Go fuck her and make her bleed if that’s what gets you off…. and leave me alone.” I whispered and he smiled, bending down pressing a kiss right where he’d burned my skin.

“I don’t need you to tell me that. She’s my fiancé. The woman I’m going to marry. And you know what that means? I actually give a shit whether she cums or not. And trust me she does. Multiple times. Sometimes so hard she passes out.”

“Or maybe she fakes it. Maybe she passes out because she can’t stand your touch either.” I shrugged. “ Because we all know that’s what she’s good at Jungkook. She faked her friendship with me , she’ll fake her loyalty to you.”

“Always got something smart to say, huh Elena? Let’s see how mouthy you get when I’m shoving my cock down your throat.”

I flinched when he pushed me, hard enough to send me sprawling on the floor. I caught myself with difficulty , throwing my hands out to keep my head from hitting the floor. I flinched at the pain that shot up my body, every inch throbbing because of how rough this fucker had been with me.

Ten days and the aftermath of that night still lingered on me.

And it was three in the morning and I’d spent eight hours on my feet bussing tables , I was exhausted.

I closed my eyes, before pressing my palm against the floor, trying to pull myself up when I felt the press of his shoe at the base of my spine, pushing me down.

I whimpered in shock, my hands giving out and shoulder crashing down into the floor.

“Stay down for a second, baby.” He whispered and I exhaled.

I pressed my palm against the floor, head dropping on to the carpeted floor . I whimpered when I felt him crouch down, foot digging in harder into my back and I curled my fingers into the carpet to swallow the pained sound that bubbled up in my throat.

“I’m going to fuck you again. And this time I want you to do all the work.” Jungkook’s voice came from over me and I flinched. I considered the odds of me putting up a fight and actually winning. It was laughable. I wasn’t going to fight a force of nature. And that was what Jeon Jungkook was.

“ You can’t make me do anything Jungkook.” I whispered finally. “ You can hit me and rape me and kill me but you can’t make me do anything to you. You just have to live with that.”

His foot lifted off my spine and I felt hands on my arms, pulling me up till I was kneeling. I watched as he moved around to stand in front of me.

“Look at me.” He said carefully.” From now you only speak when I tell you to.”

“ Whatever. Let’s get this over with so I can go see my sister and my nephew.“ I said shakily.

He sighed deeply at that, shaking his head.

“See, if it was upto me, I’d just put a bullet in both their heads. Cos at this point they’re just proving to be a nuisance.”

My blood turned to ice in my veins.

“ But, Yoongi’s just getting to know your pretty little Jisoo…And he’s my favorite hyung. So I’m going to let her live. But, let’s not invade their privacy for a while.” He began unbuckling his belt and I felt nausea rise inside me.

“Jungkook?” The voice came from the door and I stiffened. Jungkook groaned.

“Baby, what the fuck are you doing here?” He said gruffly, standing up and using his knee to push me out of the way roughly. I swore, gripping the edge of the table near me to steady myself before turning around to stare at the woman at the door. I stumbled to my feet, still feeling a little out of it. I needed food. Before I collapsed in a heap on the floor.

“You were supposed to come see me tonight. I went looking for you everywhere and I find you here about to get with some common whore?” she shouted and I stiffened, glaring at her.

She stood framed in the doorway, staring at me for a second before letting her gaze wander all over the room. She stared at me, eyes taking in the unbuttoned blouse and I quickly moved to put the buttons back on.

“Did you fuck her?” She demanded angrily and Jungkook hummed.

“Since when did I owe you answers, angel?” He asked casually and I watched the woman’s eyes widen, before her brows furrowed in a frown.

“ So what, I can’t ask you who you’re with ?” She asked angrily and Jungkook groaned , kicking out at the nearest stand with enough force to send it toppling over the side, crashing to floor and breaking on impact. I stumbled, back, wrapping my arms around myself as he fairly growled.

“What the fuck is up with all you cunts today?” He demanded, glancing at me in distaste. “ I come back after busting my ass at work for ten entire days . I just needed to get my dick sucked and you two.” He shook his head, hand reaching into his jacket and I felt my eyes widen when he pulled his glock out, releasing the safety and loading the gun before pressing the muzzle right against her skull.

The woman whimpered, hands held up as he tapped the firearm against her.

“You. You don’t come anywhere near me unless I send for you. Is that clear?” He asked sharply and she nodded frantically, abject terror written all over her face.

He turned to me.

“And you. You’re coming with me.” He said quietly and I felt my eyes widen. I opened my mouth to protest but the girl at the door beat me to it.

“I think not…. You’re not taking her anywhere, Jungkook, I’ll-“ She began, reaching forward to grab him and Jungkook moved so quickly, I could barely blink.

The shot rang out , making me jump and I watched as she crumbled to the floor, crying out in pain. I stared in horror, watching the hole in her arm, spilling blood all over the floor and the hallway and my throat went completely dry, staring at the girl on the floor and the blank, absolutely merciless look on his face.

“Just because I let you sit on my cock once in a while, doesn’t mean you get a say in how I live my life.” He said quietly, using his foot to prod her hip. He glanced at me and I felt my throat go dry as he pulled the glock back to reload it.

He aimed the gun right at me, eyes dark and heavy.

“Are you going to be good for me, baby? Or do you need a physical demonstration as well?” He tilted his head to where the girl was on the floor, pressing her palm against her arm.

“She’s bleeding out.. “ I choked out. “ you need to get her help, Jungk-“

Another shot rang out and I jumped, heart in my throat as I tried to understand what had happened. It took me a second to realize that he hadn’t shot me. That he had fired at the ceiling.

“Answer the bloody question Elena.” He growled and I flinched, nodding.

“I… I’ll listen… Just…” I glanced back at the poor girl on the floor.” Get her some help.”

Jungkook smiled a little. He turned to the girl on the floor and shook his head.

“Get up baby. Go find Hoseok and get that patched up, yeah? And don’t provoke me the next time, yeah? ” He said casually and she stumbled to her feet, looking disoriented and scared as she moved out of the door.

“ And you. “ He glared at me. “Finish dressing up and follow me.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Where are we going?” I asked nervously, fighting the instinct to just take off at a sprint, as we walked down the road to where his Mercedes was parked.

“My home. Where else?” He said casually and I stiffened.

“Jungkook-“

“Didn’t I tell you not to speak unless I ask you to, Elena? I’m jet lagged and angry. Trust me , you don’t want to piss me off now.” He said casually and I swallowed.

He opened the door for me, the polite gesture so at odds with what he was doing that my head began to throb.

But I climbed in nonetheless. I stayed quiet for the short ride to his apartment , eyes fixed straight ahead and Jungkook was quiet too. I was too exhausted to be scared, I thought despondently, my eyes drooping because of how long I’d been up. Glancing out the window, I watched the cars whizz by, people living their lives, completely unaware that almost all of them were merely tiny little gears in a machine run exclusively by men like Jungkook. That all their lives, spent working and earning and dying…it was all meaningless. They had no say in anything. People like Jungkook were the ones who got to shape the world to their liking. The ones who got to play God.

And Jungkook was definitely the closest to an omnipotent human I’d ever come across.

Powerful, untouchable and terrifying.

So perhaps, it was a little flattering, that I was the one thing he couldn’t get out of his head.

I glanced at him discreetly.

He was beautiful, I thought with a pang. One of the most beautiful men on this planet. Despite the years, his boyish charm was still right there on his face and he could slip on a plaid shirt , a white t shirt and stone wash jeans and pass off as an innocent college student. I stared at the taut jaw, the long column of his neck and the broad back. His biceps bulged when he gripped the steering when and my eyes lingered on the long fingers curled around the wheel.

I jumped when his hand moved to grip the stick shift , curling on the knob and yanking it back with force. I swallowed, thighs pressing together as my mind shifted to that night in Hoseok’s club. I hated myself for how often I relived it. And not always with disgust.

My fingers fell on the ring on his finger. His engagement ring, I thought with a pang. Lisa. Beautiful, wonderful Lisa who had been a dear friend . Once. For all her shortcomings I knew she loved the man who sat next to me. Cared deeply for him, even. Why else would she do this to me? She must have strong feelings for him , if it had prompted her to throw away our friendship of over a decade.

“You’re cheating on her then.” I said quietly. His reminder to not talk to him rang in my head but I couldn’t stop myself. He wasn’t a stranger. And that ring…the ring that promised to bind two people forever….. I’d worn it too. For him.

Jungkook didn’t reply, merely glancing at me in passing.

I sighed, looking at my knees, feeling my shoulders tremble a bit.

“Is she going to be there?” I asked quietly.

He exhaled sharply. I noticed the way his grip on the steering wheel tightened.

“No.” He said shortly.

“She lives with you right? You said we’re going home ….then where is she-“

“What is this, twenty fucking questions?” He snapped and I swallowed. “ I’m not taking you home to my fiancée Elena, do I look like a fucking idiot? “ He shook his head.

Before I could demand more answers, he was pulling over into a side alley. I watched as he carefully parked the car before stepping out. Second later, he was coming around and opening the door.

I stared at him, gripping the hem of my blouse, tight. My stomach twisted into knots.

“Can’t you just let me go?” I whispered softly, pride forgotten in the wake of my tiredness. Jungkook stared at me, face eerily blank.

“Get out of the car.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Like it?” He asked softly and I stood on the threshold, taking in the lavishly decorated apartment on the top floor of the building. I noticed the portrait right up front, a large full sized photo of me and Jungkook from nearly a decade ago, wrapped around each other in a hug , showing off our engagement bands.

“What is this?”

“It was supposed to be your wedding gift. From me. I bought it for you. Nine years ago. Thought you should see it.” He said quietly.

I stayed perfectly still , as he wrapped his hands around me in a hug.

“Why did you leave me, Elena?” He asked quietly and I felt my throat go dry.

“Why do you still have this place? Get rid of it.” I snapped. He laughed at that , pulling away and turning me around till I stared at him.

“ Will you stay here, with me?” He asked softly and I froze.

“You’re out of your mind.” I said shortly.

He hummed.

“Possibly. But then, the problem is this. If I tell you , you can’t leave this place ever again….There’s not much you can do about it, right?” He said thoughtfully and I felt a sob building in my chest.

“I… Don’t.” I said shakily.

“You should see the bedroom. Come.”

His fingers wrapped around my wrist dragging me past the lavish couch and sofa, past a well kept bar onto a wide hallway dimly lit. He stopped at the second door on the right, reaching out to open the lock. The room was plunged in darkness and I hesitated.

“Go on… After you, Mrs. Jeon.” He said softly . I could feel distaste creeping up my spine at the name, shivering a bit as I stepped into the darkness.

“Can you imagine, if we’d gotten married. This is what our first night together would be like…” He pressed against my back, arms coming around me , so gentle that I shivered.

“Jungkook…what are you doing?” I asked shakily.

“Shush…. “ He whispered, moving to unbutton my blouse again. I grabbed his wrists quickly.

“We aren’t married. I’m not your wife.” I said sharply and I felt him go still behind me.

“Shut your mouth and play along like a good girl.” He said quietly. He shook my hands off, moving to undo the buttons again.

Not sure what he expected, I stayed perfectly still as he hummed, pressing soft feather light kisses down my jaw and past my shoulders. His hands stroked up and down my arm as he laughed .

“Did you miss me Elena…..all these years…” He said quietly. “ Because I missed you. So much.”

He hugged me close, tight and hard.

“Are you scared?” He whispered, “ honey?”

“Oh, God…” I choked out, nausea rising up in my throat at the endearment.

“My wife…” He whispered, pressing a few more kisses against my skin before pushing me a bit towards the bed. “ Should I turn on the lights? I wanna see you.”

He nudged me towards the bed and my legs gave out when I hit the edge of it, legs turning to jelly as I sat on it, shaky and creeped out and terrified. Jungkook moved to turn on the lamp on the bedside table, a soft golden glow lighting up the bed .

“Look at you… so beautiful.” He whispered and I watched as he tugged off his shirt, before moving to his belt. He was watching me like I was something precious. Like I was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

“What are you doing?” I asked quietly and he smiled, running his fingers over the tattoos decorating his chest. He stopped at a large ornate tiger lily, inscribed right over his heart.

“Do you like it?” he said softly. “ I got this for you. My Elena…. As delicate as a lily and as brave as a tiger.”

I stared at him in disbelief.

“Either fuck me or let me go, I’m not here to talk about-“

He slapped me, so hard that my head whipped to the side, my face feeling like it had caught fire. I gasped, the pain spreading all over my jaw and I couldn’t quite grasp what had just happened. I pressed shaky fingers to the throbbing skin near my mouth, eyes watering at the sting.

“Didn’t I tell you to play along, angel?” He whispered sharply and I closed my eyes , shuddering.

Play along. Do it if you want to get out of here alive. ‘

Fucking psychopath.

“ It’s beautiful, Jungkook.” I whispered softly, glancing at him with teary eyes. He nodded.

“We’ll get one for you too. A wolf. With the initials JK on it…. Right here…” He lightly traced a path over my collarbone and I hoped to God, this was some sick fantasy. That he wasn’t seriously considering tattooing his initials on me.

“Strip for me baby… All of it. I want to see you.” He whispered and I hesitated just long enough to take a deep breath. I reached back, quickly undoing my bra clasp and pulling the fabric off. I hooked my thumbs into my skirt and my panties, tugging both of them off me, swiftly. I dropped all of it on the floor next to the bed, before moving to kneel in the middle of the bed, staring at him with a smile that felt physically painful.

“I’m going to make you feel good, baby.” He whispered quietly, crawling over on top of me.

“Lay down for me.” He said, and I felt repulsed, as he kissed my lips, soft and gentle, pressing in till I was flat on my back, legs parted so he could lie in between.

It was so different from last time and somehow ten times worse.

Jungkook pressed kisses all over my face, whispering gentle words against my skin that felt like acid.

“So beautiful…. Mine. You were always mine Elena. Mine to touch and mine to break . Mine to love and mine to fuck.”

I stared as he loomed over, his face inches from mine, his gaze deceptively affectionate, his eyes warm and almost soft. I watched as he came closer, his lips closing over mine. Instinctively I kept my lips together but his fingers curled around my thigh, squeezing hard enough to make me whimper, lips parting . He pressed his tongue in then , licking into my mouth and I brought my hands up, instinctively wrapping around the bare skin of his shoulders and my body thrummed at the feeling of his muscles under my fingers.

Curiosity made me foolish, and I found myself tracing the hills and valleys of his skin, fascinated by the way the muscles flexed, every time he moved his arm.

“You like that? I worked hard on those…” He chuckled, watching me curl my fingers around his biceps. He was so… big. I moved my fingers up to the hardness of his chest, splaying my palm on his pecs and my fingers caught a hard little scar, almost perfectly round and deep.

“What is this…” I asked , curious my finger dipping into the healed skin and he hummed.

“Your father . He shot me when I was chasing his car down in Jeju Do. Foolish bastard. Thought he could outrun me.” He laughed .

I glanced at him, catching his eyes and the ebbing laughter , my heart twisting.

“Then why am I here? You hate my father. You killed my entire family. So why am I here, Jungkook?” I asked foolishly, my heart breaking a bit and he hesitated.

“Because you’re mine.” He said simply.

I closed my eyes in despair.

“If this was our wedding night…. What would you say…?” He asked suddenly.

I stared at him, confused.

“What?”

“If we got married back then… When you were eighteen. And it was our first night together….. what would you say?”

I sighed.

“I’d ask you to ….to be gentle.” I whispered.

He nodded.

“Tell me , then.”

I stared at him, feeling helpless.

“Go on, Elena.” He said again.

“Jungkook…” I began but he shook his head.

“Ggukkie.” He said softly. “ Call me GGukkie… That’s what you used to call me …when we were young.”

I clenched my fists, on his chest, resisting the urge to push him off. That wouldn’t end well for me.

“GGukkie…” I whispered, finally, glancing up at him, licking my lips and parting them gently, eyes as wide as they could go, “ you know its my first time right?”

Jungkook’s eyes fairly danced at that and he hummed, leaning closer.

“Is it, baby?” He asked, reaching up to brush my hair away, fingers gentle on my face.

Get into it. Get into it and get it over with.

“You know it is…” I pouted, “ No one else can touch me. I’m yours , aren’t I GGukkie…”

He laughed, rubbing his nose against mine.

“That you are, kitten.”

Kitten? That’s a new one.

Shut up and stay in character , fuck.

I was so fucking screwed.

“ So… will you be gentle?” I whispered , “ I don’t want it to hurt.”

Jungkook wrapped his arms around me rolling over and taking me with him till I was lying flat on top of him.

“Then how about this angel? You can ride me…. As slow and gentle as you like. Make yourself feel good on my cock, yeah….?”

I stared at him.

I’m gonna fuck you and you’re going to do all the work.

He’d played me like a fiddle.

“Well baby? Go on…. Take my pants off.”

I exhaled angrily, before moving down, to tug on his pants. He helped me take them off kicking off his boxer briefs as well.

That’s a beautiful dick. Objectively. Very pretty.

Shut the fuck up.

“ Get it wet for me baby….” He said softly. I glanced down at the hard length of it, jutting out of the small thatch of hair and felt my mouth go dry . Which would be counterproductive if I wanted to get it wet. So I swirled my tongue around my mouth, trying to get my mouth moist, before leaning down and carefully wrapping my lips around the head.

Fuck, he tastes good.

I shook my head a bit to clear the voice in my head, glancing up at him with my lips stretched around the soft pink head and he was looking right back at me, eyes heavy and dark .

“Go on baby, take more of it in, use your tongue…make me feel good.”

I closed my eyes, letting the spit coat the hard length of his cock, sinking down till the tip began to inch down my throat. I sucked lightly, running my tongues back and forth on whatever skin I could touch and it was like sucking a lollipop except the lollipop was thick enough to stretch my mouth wide and hit the back of my throat.

I felt his hand reach into my hair, gripping hard and I whimpered.

“Be gentle…” I whispered, pulling off and his eyebrows shot up , clearly in surprise . He stared at me for a second, as though considering my request and then his fingers loosened , threading through the strands soothingly.

“I’m sorry, baby.” He whispered . I went back to sucking him off, somehow my natural tendency to work hard making me bob up and down, using my tongue and taking him as deep as I could. I felt a sick sort of satisfaction when he moaned in pleasure and for some damn reason I wanted to draw more sounds out of him.

This is a dream. Either that or you tripped over a pothole and fell into another dimension.

“ Are you wet ? Come here, so I can check….” Jungkook said softly and I pulled off moving up to straddle his hips. I flinched when he reached down, tracing my slit with carefully fingers before slipping in two. I tightened against the intrusion, still sore on the inside and he pulled his fingers out, bringing them up to my mouth.

“Suck…and get them nice and wet if you don’t want it to hurt.” He said quietly and I wrapped my lips around his fingers, letting my spit coat the slender digits.

When he pushed them back into me, the slide was easier , wetter and I gripped his shoulders, trying to relax around him. It felt foreign but also good… I felt good…

I stared down at him, the broad muscled body and the handsome face and for a crazy moment I imagine what it would have been, if I had married him. Would it have been this….this… weird pleasure that was somehow both painful and exhilarating at the same time. I bit my lips as he curled his fingers inside me, rubbing at some spot high up inside me that sent heat shooting straight up my spine, slick dripping out of me and onto the hard planes of his stomach like honey from a comb.

“Now sit on my cock.” He said quietly. I trembled, reaching down to lightly grip his cock, moving till the head lined up right against my slit or where I thought my slit was. Biting my lips, I lowered my body, feeling my body cleave to let him in, his cock pressing in and in and in.

My knees gave out and I slid down the length of him, the sudden, incredible fullness knocking the breath right out of me.

“ Fuck…baby….you alright?” He whispered and it messed with my head, the way he actually looked concerned and worried and I couldn’t take anymore of it.

“Please… Please… I just… I want to go home…” I whimpered, feeling full and stretched out, my thighs trembling and my insides wet and warm and somehow stuck between wanting more and wanting it to end.

Jungkook grunted, fingers curling over both my hips and lifting me lightly and with ease.

“Come on baby…. Ride me….” He whispered, “ Put your hands on my chest and roll your hips, up and down .”

I did as he said, one hand braced against his chest, the other gripping his shoulder as I tried to move on him but it was hopeless. I had no energy or inclination to do this and the pleasure was fast ebbing into frustration. Jungkook seemed to sense it because he growled.

“Fuck, you’re so fucking bad at this… Fine… Just lay there and let me use that stupid cunt of yours.” He snapped, gripping my waist and folding his knees just enough to brace his feet on the bed. I gasped as I got lifted a bit , his cock slipping in impossibly deeper , the tip nudging close to my cervix , the lightest brush of it send sharp jolts of electric pain pleasure up my spine.

“Oh fuck,..” I breathed as he pistoned into me, hips hitting my ass with brutal force as he fucked up into me and I could only tremble, eyes fluttering shut, fingers going numb from how hard I was gripping him.

“You’re gonna cum today… I’m gonna make you cum on my cock…” He growled, reaching down and pressing his thumb against my clit, rubbing softly, slow circles that were almost gentle compared to the brutal pounding oh his hips and I felt my mouth go slack, wetness slipping out of my tongue and dripping down my chin because of how excruciatingly good it felt, having him so deep, pressing in against the edge of my womb and I and to press my palm, right up against my belly , stunned because of how my body seemed to open and shift to make room for him.

“I’m gonna cum inside you, right inside your womb, fuck…. Gonna carry my babies for me, right sweetheart? Gonna watch you get round and full with my seed , watch you drip milk all over me with those beautiful tits….fuck…”

The shock of his words sent me over the edge, my body clenching down on him as I came, my orgasm so strong that I felt like I was cramping up on the inside and I toppled forward onto him, landing on his chest and bouncing a bit. Jungkook grunted a little, wrapping both his arms around me, holding close as he fucked me right through the aftershocks, body stilling only when I stopped shuddering and I felt warm wetness spill inside me, so deep that I knew I would have to swallow three morning after pills after this, although I was on birth control.

Because one could never be too sure with these things.

Jungkook stayed still under me and it took me a few seconds to catch my breath. I finally levered myself off of him, legs shaking as I rolled over and onto the bed before breathing in huge lungfuls of air.

“Can I go?” I choked out.

Jungkook grunted. “ Get the fuck out of here.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I stumbled out of the cab, exhausted and out of my mind with self loathing, I didn’t expect to see Hoseok sitting on the pavement outside the bakery, leaning against a streetlight, face warm but determined.

“Hobi?” I asked stunned. “ What are you-“

He cut me off with a kiss.

I stared wide eyed as he pulled me into an embrace, wrapping me in warmth and scent of his cologne, his hands impossibly gentle around me as he all but cradled me against his body, his lips moving gently against mine.

“Elena…” He breathed against my lips, eyes glinting . “ I love you. I’ve been in love with you for years. I’m so fucking sorry for being such a coward but you deserve to know… you deserve to know how I feel about you.”

I stared at him in disbelief, my heart pounding as I punched his chest in desperation.

“No… No fuck you… what are you doing…. He’ll kill you…” I hissed and he tightened his arms around me.

“I don’t care.” He hissed. “ I don’t… I can’t just… I can’t let him hurt you like this. I won’t. I’m going to tell him. I’m going to tell him to let you go or lose our friendship.” He said angrily and I trembled.

My heart raced because Hoseok was the only one I’d ever loved. In every way a girl could love a boy. He was and had always been this confusing breed of brother and friend while everyone had drooled after Jeon Jungkook , I’d always been drawn to him…drawn to his quiet strength and to the way he had always treated me as an equal…

But… but Jungkook…. Jungkook who would put a bullet in his brain without a thought if he thought that Hoseok was trying to move in on something that belonged to him…..

“Hoseok…just… Don’t. I… I love you too…” I breathed out, tired and scared and so fucking worried because what if someone was listening even now..what if word got to Jungkook and he tried to hurt ….i couldn’t even think it.

“Come find me when Jungkook is busy . When he can’t find us…” I said softly, reaching out and pressing my palm against his face.

“I’m not scared of him.” Hoseok growled and it was ridiculous.

“But I’m scared of losing you. “ I said quickly. “ We can’t… He can’t know. Ever.”

Hoseok nodded before pulling me close again.

“Was he too rough?” He whispered and I blinked, flushing. I shook my head.

“No.. I. No. I think…”

“I hate that he was the one to touch you, first. You.. You deserve to know how good it can be…. How gentle.. I want to… fuck…” He shook his head pulling away and I wrapped my arms around myself.

“We can’t…” I said quietly. “ you know we can’t.”

He glanced at me, eyes blazing and lips parted and I groaned.

“Don’t look at me like that Hobi…” I whispered, shaking my head.

“Tomorrow. He’s going to Jeju Do , to inspect a new resort. He won’t be back till the day after. Call in sick at work.” He said quietly and I bit my lips, feeling a bit like a whole idiot.

I nodded.

He reached forward and pressed a kiss to my forehead.

No self preservation skills at all, I thought miserably.

If Jungkook found out…….

Author’s Note : I’ll add the taglist here tomorrow

#bts smut #bts fanfics #bts fics #bts #jungkook smut #jungkook #bts scenarios #jungkook fics #bts fanfic

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