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angstyandromanticwriting · 2 months ago

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Regina George X Fem!Reader Angsty, Cute, and Fluffy Prompt [Sneak-Peek]

• Takes place after the occurrence of the film [2024 ver. with Reneé Rapp]

• Some mild changes made to some elements of the story

• The prompt will be dropping in its entirety on Saturday + There will be more!

• This is another new idea, but does not impact the other ideas I am already writing for!

Birds’ Eye View/Heart’s Desire

“Are you done, or-?” You inquired, raising your eyebrows, after Regina threw another line of insults at you; you’d told her to rant, seeing she needed it, but…

“No,” she answered, without hesitation, even though she appeared a little exasperated, wincing, before she looked away from you, and sighed heavily, knowing she shouldn’t get you involved with all that was currently frustrating her following her recent arguments with her boyfriend, Shane Olman, especially when you didn’t even know him, and hadn’t ever talked to him, only a recent student at Northshore High School, managing to take on Senior Year after you’d been expelled from your last school. “Yes,” she added, barely audibly, and you would appear surprised, not expecting such an answer from her as you tilted your head partially, a pained as well as skeptical expression on your face; you didn’t want her to feel as if she couldn’t talk to you about all that was burdening her the way you feared she did, hoping against hope - however - at the same time, that she had instead managed to clear her mind a little, until she crumpled, and looked up at you again with a hurt look on her face before she said ‘no’, her voice softer than you’d ever heard it before. “N-No, I’m not, I-.. I’m-..” She shrugged, before awkwardly bowing her head, and you would nod gravely, smiling sadly over at her, before you timidly inched closer to her to gently squeeze her shoulder, prompting her to express relief, her heart skipping a beat, before she glanced up at you again, and felt strong enough to continue just by having her gaze lock with your own in the best way possible. “I hate you,” she spat, her gaze never leaving your’s, whilst you couldn’t help, but smirk in her direction, amused though you knew you shouldn’t be, but it didn’t stop your heart from aching as you wondered who had hurt her the way you could tell that they had, before she’d come back to your Uncle’s ranch with you. “Y-You stink, and I hope an air conditioner falls on you,” she added sharply, clearly through gritted teeth, whilst you appeared taken aback - of all things you thought she might say, that was one of the least you’d been expecting to hear, but it still made you have to fight back a giggle regardless of how it had shocked you, at first, “okay.” She drew in another shallow breath, before releasing it through her nose like you’d told her to, just to try and calm her down when she’d almost broken one of the mucking up shovels you and her had been using to tidy up the horses’ stalls here. “Okay, I - I think I’m-.. I think I’m done, now,” she stated, and you would almost feel disappointed, though at the same time of course you were relieved to know that she seemed at least somewhat relieved, now that she’d slung out yet another insult in your direction, though she wasn’t directing anything of what she meant toward you; she couldn’t.

The thought startled her, just for a moment, as she winced again, and forced a smile in your direction, trying to hide that such a small thing had flustered her the way nothing else ever had before.

“That’s good,” you stated, and she would hesitate, before nodding, and smiling softly over at you, this time the smile was genuine; it was hard not to allow the corners of her lips to curve upward whenever she was around you, “that’s always good - so-.. are you ready to talk about it, now?”

She would appear taken aback by your question, her smile faltering a little, before she awkwardly cleared her throat, and nodded slowly, though you could tell she was reluctant to discuss what had been happening between her and Shane recently.

“I guess,” she answered, and you would smile warmly back at her, glad that she felt able to talk about such things with you - it even made you feel a little warm and fuzzy inside, like a sense of pride was washing over you in response to your hope that she seemed to trust you, just as much as you trusted her, and somehow had ever since you’d first met her that day; the day she’d first been sent here by her mother to distract her, and take her mind off of the tense situation between her and Shane, before you’d even started at Northshore High. “But - if we’re gonna talk about it,” she began again, and you would tense up for a moment, wondering what she might be about to say, next; you were always terrified that maybe something bad would happen - that maybe she would up, and abandon you, though you couldn’t imagine why. You always put such dread up to how you’d been kidnapped, and abused the way you and, a few years ago now; you were quite young when it happened, and the nights you’d spent screaming and crying had never left your mind, especially not at night, where your nightmares were at their most vivid moments. For a moment, you remembered your kidnapper coming in to kick at your side for how you’d tried to call your home, after successfully sneaking out of his basement, but that wasn’t the worst of the punishment; he spent every night after that breaking each and every one of your fingers, and he would have moved onto your wrist, or toes, if the police didn’t locate you when they did. You winced at the memory, but you wouldn’t let her see the pain in your eyes as you bowed your head, before she could lock eyes with you again, making her heart sink a little as soon as she realised she wouldn’t be able to lock eyes with you again, if you didn’t lift your head the way you had, before, trying to act as if you were distracted by the next pile of dung you were shovelling up at your feet. “Can we do it whilst we’re mucking up, l-like we are, now?” You appeared taken aback again by her request, forgetting your previous thought as you looked up at her again, forgetting how to breathe for a moment whilst she silently admired your eyes without even realising that she was, trying to tell herself that it was just because it made sense to make eye contact right now, rather than glance down at your lips, or just down at the ground when you were both in the middle of a conversation the way that you were, or had been, now.

You appeared skeptical again, once you’d recomposed yourself, and could finally breathe again, as soon as you remembered how your lungs were supposed to work, ever since you’d been born a few years ago, now.

“I don’t know,” you answered warily, prompting her heart to sink, and eyes to darken a little; it made something ache within her for a reason unbeknownst to her to see that you still didn’t seem to trust her with the shovel, but she guessed she understood after she’d been wielding it the way she had earlier, wanting to either break it or smack someone over the head with it whilst she’d been thinking about her and Shane’s recent argument. It was seeing the hurt on her face - even if it were only there for a moment - that made your heart cave in, as you - without hesitation - took up her shovel, before holding it out to her, and forgetting how to breathe all over again as you waited for her to take it from you. “Here, of - of course we can,” you reassured her gently, a little breathlessly, but you tried to hide that you couldn’t breathe as you tried not to watch her hand as it inched closer to your own, before she accepted the shovel from you, and couldn’t help, but allow the pinky finger of her left hand to brush against the back of your own, prompting your heart to stutter, and you to tense up again as a makeshift spurt of electricity seemed to run down your arm - something you’d never felt before. You wondered if she felt it too, noticing the dazed expression on her face, making your cheeks heat up as you hastily looked away from her again, though you longed to keep your eyes focused on her, and only her, despite your not knowing why you’d even had such a reaction to her skin touching your own the way it had, for a split second.

“Thank you,” she replied, once she’d been able to find her voice again as she smiled timidly down at the ground beneath her, “that was-.. really brave of you, considering.”

You lifted your eyebrows again as you glanced over at her, confused by her praise, but still you couldn’t keep the smile from your face as your eyes glinted a little over at her, prompting her heart to skip a beat again as soon as she felt your eyes upon her, encouraging her more than enough to glance up at you again, her eyes not hesitating to lock with your own as you both faltered in place for a moment, staring over at each other as if nobody else existed anymore, besides you two, right here, right now.

It took her more strength than it ever had before to stay stood where she was, seeing herself in another universe inching closer to you, whilst she lifted her right hand up to your left cheek, only making her heart begin to pound a little as you warily glanced over at her, your heart skipping a beat, almost as if you were picturing the same thing as she was, hardly breathing, just like she was, stood before you, before her eyes darkened, and she awkwardly cleared her throat again to break herself from her previous daze, as well as you from your own as you silently cursed yourself, before digging up at the muck again to try and clear your head somehow, only to fail miserably as soon as you felt her hand upon your shoulder.

“Reg-” You spluttered out, before you even knew her name was slipping from your lips, but before you could continue, she pressed on, determined to show you that she meant everything she told you, whilst she knew you silently doubted some things about yourself, though you’d not even told her her about what had happened to you, when you were younger, and felt more hopeless than you ever had before.

“I meant it,” she cooed, gently squeezing your shoulder as you timidly glanced up at her, wishing you could breathe normally again, whilst at the same time you were terrified of losing the way she made you feel, whenever she was with you the way she was, now, “you’re the bravest girl I know.”

You tried not to shudder, your eyes threatening to fill with tears as a lump began to form within your throat, only making it harder for you to not break down in front of her as you forced a shaky smile in her direction, before bowing your head again as soon as small tears began to form within your eyes.

“Bravest, huh?” You mused, and she nodded hastily, not hesitating at all because she meant every word, and knew she always would. Being hit by a bus the way she had last year had made her feel different; more grateful, of everything, as well as everyone, around her - for a split second, whilst she was unconscious, she swore her life had flashed before her eyes, and it made her feel guilty for almost everything she’d ever done - well, everything, until now.

“You - mean a heck of a lot to me,” she expressed, and you would appear taken aback again, your heart skipping a beat, before you glanced up at her again, and wondered why your heart felt as if it were being squeezed even though at the same time it felt as if it were currently soaring with every word she shared with you, and you’d reacted in similar ways ever since you’d first met her, and began to feel alive whenever she was with you the way that she was, now, “you always have, e-ever since I-.. y’know, got to actually know you, and talk to you, and that’ll never change, I promise - you know that, right?”

“I know,” you reassured her, your voice briefly trembling, prompting her heart to squeeze alongside your own as she frowned, and carefully eased you into a hug whilst you melted into her embrace, and wouldn’t hesitate to return it as you buried your face into her left shoulder, feeling safer than you ever had before as you subconsciously drowned within her sweet scent in the best way possible.

“Good,” she returned gently, “I’m glad.” You both fell quiet for a moment as you tried to recompose yourselves, before she held you at arms length blissfully, her eyes glinting alongside your own. “So,” she chimed, and you couldn’t help, but giggle softly whilst you carefully brushed away any remaining tears, “should we continue mucking, or-?”

You smiled warmly at her, before nodding, and taking up your shovel again, as if she hadn’t had you almost breaking down completely within her arms a brief moment ago.

“I’d love to,” you replied, brighter than she’d ever heard you before, prompting her heart to jump alongside your own as she smiled sheepishly back at you, evidently glad to see that you were happy again, now that she’d admitted to you that you were more than what you thought you were to her, before, “as long as you’re still up to talking about whatever you wanna talk about, as we go?”

She tensed up again, remembering Shane, and the fight he and her had had, earlier today, and for a moment you regretted more than anything bringing up the situation, until she smiled reassuringly over at you again, and nodded, before taking your free hand within her own to soothe you even more, indirectly making your heart pound faster than it ever had before as you tried not to glance down at her fingers intertwined with your own, whilst also silently praying that she couldn’t hear what was currently going on within your chest.

“Always,” she answered, and you would express relief, your expression softening, before you glanced down at the ground again, your cheeks heating up even more than they ever had before, “but before that - where should we start?”

~~~~~

Hope you enjoyed it, and are looking forward to the dropping of the full version! ❤️

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angstyandromanticwriting · 2 months ago

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Regina George X Fem!Reader Angsty, Cute, and Fluffy Prompt [Full Version - Part 2 due to Tumblr’s text block limit]

• Takes place after the occurrence of the film [2024 ver. with Reneé Rapp]

• Some mild changes made to some elements of the story

• This is the entirety of the prompt/instalment, as promised!

• There will be more!

!TW: Being stuck in a toxic relationship, insult(s), mention of previously being kidnapped, implied suffering from PTSD + Depression + Separation Anxiety + Anxiety in general, mention of previously being abused (physically and verbally) + injury detail, jealousy, mention of divorce + poor relationship with family/family members, elements of self-doubt + presence of self put-downs, panic-attacks/mention of them, swearing, presence of weaponry, threat(s), suicide attempt(s) + suicidal intentions + consideration, implied/mention of previous elements of homophobia, mention of having nightmares linked to trauma, drug-taking (medication), mention of substance abuse (alcohol addiction), mention of miscarrying, breaking up, sense of drowning - if I’ve missed any, let me know!

Birds’ Eye View/Heart’s Desire

You tried to make it a memorable night; you randomly decided to dance upon your bed with her, for most of it, not sure why, before she had to hide within your closet from your Uncle, Cal, whenever he came into check on you. After he’d got the horses back into the stable, you and her were laying upon your backs, still on the bed, giggling breathlessly alongside each other after you’d had to rescue her from falling off, wrapping your arms around her, before your action brought you both down, luckily still on the bed, rather than off of it, though - you were sure, no matter what happened between you both - you were take such a blow like that for her, any day.

It got you to thinking about your and her previous conversation; how you’d left her side, earlier, only making you feel guilty - what if something had happened to her, on her way back? What if Sunrise had bucked her off? What if she got a concussion, or worse - broke her neck? You tensed up, a pained expression on your face as you glanced over at her, your eyes darkening as you did, but by the time she glanced over at you, she was still smiling, until her heart dropped as soon as she noticed you were trying not to cry, beside her.

“Y/n?” She cooed, her voice gentle, and still sounding a little breathless. “A-Are you-”

“I’m sorry,” you managed weakly, “I-..” You winced, before hastily looking away from her, even as if she intertwined the fingers of her left hand with the fingers of your right one. “I’m so-”

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” she reassured you, “I promise; I-.. you haven’t hurt me, in any way, shape, or form - you know that, right?”

You hesitated, timidly glancing over at her as you wondered if the electrical current within live wires was stronger than the current passing between your and her hands, right now.

“I know,” you reassured her gently, “I just-.. I guess I just-.. I don’t know; I’m fine, don’t - don’t worry about me.”

“You aren’t fine,” she contradicted; she could heart, as well as see that you weren’t, and it pained her to see that you were still trying to hide things from her the way that you were, “Y/n-”

“Reg,” you interjected shakily, small tears leaking from your eyes, but she wouldn’t give in; she wanted to try and do all she could to help, you, somehow; she hated seeing you upset, the way that you currently were for a reason unbeknownst to her.

“If you’re fine, why are you crying? Aren’t you happy, y’know, to - to be with me?” She asked, and you would falter, a pained expression on your face as you looked over at her, not wanting her to think that you weren’t happy to be with her like you were, right now.

“Of course I am,” you answered, this time without any hesitation at all, because it was true; you were always happy, to be with her whenever you were both together, the way that you were, now, your hands still linked together, and bodies almost touching, only a few paces away from each other - if only you could move just one bit closer to her, and maybe they would be-

“Then what’s wrong? And don’t try and tell me that you’re fine again, because I can see that you’re anything, but fine, right now,” she pried, desperate to find out what was currently plaguing your mind; she hated to think that you were suffering, and wished she could take away anything that was hurting you, the way that this was; it was unbearable, but the worst part of it was that she couldn’t see into your mind, beautiful as she imagined it to be, regardless of the damage it had been dealt, when you were younger than you were, now.

“I-It’s nothing, I swear, I just-..” You fell quiet, your heart pounding, and breathing pattern growing to be a little staggered and uneven, as if you were trying not to panic, only worrying her even more, but before she could protest, or lift her free right hand up to your left cheek, you continued. “It - It’s you,” you managed, your voice briefly trembling, and she would falter, her expression softening a little as she tilted her head partially, trying to hide that your response had worried her, as well as disheartened her; she’d never intended to hurt you the way she assumed she had, until you spoke up again, your voice barely audible, and close to cracking even more than it ever had been, before, “y-your ability, to - to distract me, it - it’s unmatched, a-and - and I - I can’t-”

“It’s okay,” she cooed, trying to hide that she was trying not to panic, alongside you, hearing your voice shaking as you tried not to break down; struggled to breathe, even as she cradled your body close to her own, and eased you up onto your knees to help you try and recompose yourself, as well as to allow herself to connect her forehead to your own, trying her best to provide as much comfort to you as she possibly could, before you could have a panic or heart attack on her, “e-everything’s okay, I promise; you’re safe, here - I’ve got you, and I’m never going to let you go, you know that, right?”

You would appear taken aback, your heart skipping a beat as you glanced up at her, your eyes glinting as soon as they locked with her own.

“I - I know,” you reassured her, smiling timidly over at her as she express relief, evidently glad to hear that you felt safe with her, and for a moment you found yourself trying not to glance down at her lips again, prompting you to wince, and bury your face into her left shoulder; it was just too tempting, having her this close to you - it was unbearable, “I think I heard wolves outside.”

“Wolves?” Regina inquired, appearing confused, as well as concerned; she’d not heard anything out there, except for the wind, and the sound of the horses in the barn, taking a little while to settle down, as usual. “Y/n, there are no wolves here,” she reminded you gently, “are you okay?”

“I - I’m fine, I just-”

“Look at me,” she demanded, her voice ever so soft and inviting, but you didn’t dare lift your head, even as she began to plead with you, “Y/n, please, I need to see your face-”

“I don’t want to,” you interjected weakly, your voice a little strained; you tried not to sniffle, and tried to steady your breathing, but nothing was working as it should, “y-you smell nice, a-and I want to stay like this forever, s-so please don’t-.. don’t let me go.”

“I - I won’t, just please - look at me, just for a second,” she continued, desperate, and for a moment you felt like giving in, your heart aching excruciatingly alongside her own, whilst it also strangely felt like it was soaring, beside her’s, “I need to see you.”

You faltered, and didn’t hesitate to glance up at her, cheeks warming up even more, now that your eyes were meeting again, your faces inches apart.

“Why?” You asked, your voice close to a whisper, but you couldn’t quite remove the awe in your voice as you admired her again, the new light on her face only making everything about her seem so much more divine than you’d ever seen her, and you couldn’t tell if it was just because she was in your room, now, somehow, or if it was just because of how sleepy you were getting, considering your Uncle had recently given you another sleeping pill to try and ward the nightmares away, for the night.

For a moment, Regina found that she couldn’t speak, her heart pounding again so loudly; too loud, against her rib-cage, to the point she feared you might be able to hear it, somehow, but it relieved her that you weren’t teasing her about any noises like that coming from her chest, right now.

“Because you’re fucking amazing,” she answered, without even thinking, the words just slipping from her lips absentmindedly, and for a moment, you loved them, revelling in how it felt, to hear such words from her, until such thoughts were wiped from your mind completely, as soon as her lips were against your’s again, and - for the first time, in what felt like a long time - neither of you could bring yourselves to pull away.

🜚🜸🜚

You wondered how long two people could spend making out, before they passed away from a lack of oxygen; it must have been a few minutes, at least, before you and Regina had had to pull away from each other, that night, giggling breathlessly together as you lovingly admired one another. It was perfect, and you’d give anything to relive that moment - that’s why you’d bought her some flowers, a pretty pink bouquet of roses, hoping she’d like them, more than anything, to the point your hands were shaking, as long as they didn’t steal her affection for you away; it still struck you as being weird, and unusual, that she had feelings for you, too, considering you’d always seen yourself as being a nobody, whilst she was everything, even after all you’d heard about her last year, before the bus had hit her the way it did.

Of course, everything you’d heard about her saying homophobic things made you tense up, the day she’d first joined as a stablehand for your Uncle’s riding centre, but now the very thought of her just made you feel safe; warm and fuzzy, as well as light - so light, that you felt as if you could just take off, right here, right now, and disappear into the sky, except, the thought of never seeing her again kept you grounded enough to stop such a possibility from happening; you couldn’t risk doing anything that might drive her away from you.

You warily stopped at the pathway leading up to her and her mother’s home, your heart skipping so many beats; too many - it was overwhelming, but still you pressed on, trying to take measured breaths, but nothing could calm you down as much as you wished it could - nothing had ever been this important to you, before, but this - this moment was. What was stood before you; in your hands, and heart - it was everything, and you hoped you could keep it that way, no matter what the future held for you both.

You stopped by the door, next, drawing in a shaky breath as you tried to stop your hands from trembling; tried to swallow the lump in your throat as your heart pounded in your ears; blood sounding as if it were pulsing through them - everything was so loud around you, but you wouldn’t let it stop you, as you lifted your right hand, and knocked upon the door.

🜸

“I - love you, Regina,” Shane Olman claimed, stood a few paces away from her in her room, but she didn’t believe him, not that it would make much of a difference if she did, now; he couldn’t even say it, without wincing, and hastily looking away from her, making it so much harder not to hate him, as she fought back a scowl, a notion next to impossible after everything that had happened between them both, recently.

“Oh, do you? ‘Cause I don’t believe you ever did,” she retorted, and Shane would grimace over at her subconsciously, surprised she was even bothering to argue with him over something like this, “let’s face it, I’m nothing to you, but to Y/n-”

“What could she give you, that I don’t?” He questioned sharply, raising his voice a little as he did. Regina would have tried to continue, if he didn’t interject before she could do so. “She is nothing; she will never be anything, but me? I’ve always been so much more, you know that - let’s face it, she’s just a pathetic little brat, who likes clinging to walls everywhere she goes-”

“You shut your mouth, before I shut it, for you!” Regina threatened; she wouldn’t let him insult you like that, especially when he didn’t even know anything about you. You were so much more, and it hurt her to think that other people couldn’t see that, the way she, and your Uncle could. “She is everything, and so much more than you could ever be,” she retorted, standing defensively a few inches away from him, “I won’t let anyone say otherwise, especially when they don’t even know anything about her!”

“Maybe I would know something, if there was anything to be known,” he contradicted, and god did her blood boil - there was so much to be known about you, and it was lingering upon her tongue, everything you’d had to endure; things she believed he would never be able to handle. She even thought she would struggle more in a situation like the kidnapping you’d gone through, a few years ago, now. Your fingers were broken; your wrists were broken - by the time the cops actually found you, you were covered almost everywhere in bruises; her heart dropped, at the thought, whilst she subconsciously balled her hands into fists, wishing she could make your kidnapper pay for what he had done to you.

“I’m warning you, Olman,” she continued dangerously, “you say another word, and you’re gonna get it!”

Shane couldn’t help, but smirk, prompting her to wince; he’d evidently taken that the wrong way, judging by the looks of his demeanour as he inched closer to her, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“What if I want it?” He questioned, and before he could get any closer, she would shove him away from her, without any hesitation whatsoever.

“You’re disgusting,” she spat, “I wish I’d never got with you, in the first place - I - I don’t know what I ever even saw in you!”

“That’s easy,” he replied, not giving in, “you saw something you wanted in me, and maybe you still want it? If you’d just let me-”

“Regina?” Mrs. George spoke up, lingering by the door of her daughter’s bedroom.

Regina tensed up, wincing as she looked over at her mother, whilst still ensuring that she had a few paces of distance away from Shane, especially now that she felt safer to do so, with June in the room, besides her.

“What? Can’t you see that I’m trying to handle something, here?” She snapped, unintentionally; she just wanted to have done with him, now; she was sick of dealing with his bullshit, every time they spoke - it still struck her how perfect things had seemed, last year, only for them to end like this, between him and her.

“I know that, and I’m sorry, but-..” Mrs. George appeared hesitant, her gaze briefly flicking over to Shane, before she looked back at Regina. “There’s - There’s someone here to see you,” she informed gently, before lowering her voice even more, not that it made much of a difference, “it’s Y/n.”

🜸

Your hands were still shaking, by the time Mrs. George had opened the door, your words stumbling over themselves, at first, as Regina’s mother smiled softly upon noticing that it was you, timidly holding flowers still in your left hand; she was glad Regina had you, especially after her experience with Shane. She then winced, subconsciously, remembering Shane was here, with Regina, and you tried not to appear disheartened, taking the look on her face the wrong way, but you tried to hide it, regardless of how much your heart squeezed.

“I - I’m here, for - for Regina,” you stated, your voice close to a whisper, and sounding a little exasperated; you’d never done anything like this, before, and it was terrifying, to think that - if you somehow did, or said something wrong - you might lose her, somehow, “I, e-erm-.. I..”

“She’s here, but-..” Mrs. George sighed, hating that she had to do this to you, especially when you’d been so good to her daughter recently. “I’m afraid, sweetie, that - that this might not be-.. a good time; she, erm-.. she’s-”

Your blood ran cold, your eyes widening as you anxiously awaited for her to continue, your heart pounding even more overwhelmingly than it had been, before, but you couldn’t stop yourself, as the next questions rolled off your tongue.

“Where is she? W-What’s going on? Is she okay?” You asked, maybe too hastily, your voice shaking, and June would frown, feeling a little guilty; she’d not intended to scare you the way she could tell she had, and she couldn’t help, but let her heart melt in response to your reaction.

“She’s fine,” Mrs. George hastily reassured you, her voice gentle, and eyes warm as she lifted her hands up to your shoulders, trying her best to provide comfort to you before you could panic anymore than you already were, “she’s okay, I promise; don’t worry, I just-.. it’s an awkward time, right now-.. I’m sorry, honey, but-.. she’s with Shane, at the moment, and she might not want to be interrupted, but I can always go and try to get her to come down here, for you?”

🜸

“She’s what?” Regina replied, and Mrs. George would wince, noticing that she’d startled her daughter as Regina warily looked toward Shane, who scowled as he looked between her, and her mother for a moment, before he continued, sounding more hateful than he ever had before.

“What, so you’re inviting her over without telling me, now?” He assumed, and Regina couldn’t help, but grunt, grimacing in his direction again as he silently fumed, wishing he could go down there, now, and show you what he thought of you, if only it weren’t something that would land him in prison, if he didn’t escape in time.

“First of all, I didn’t invite her,” she began, though she felt bad for saying it, her heart aching a little; she didn’t want to make it sound like you weren’t welcome, when you were anything, but, “second of all, even if I did, why would I have to tell you about it? You’re here because I’m breaking up with you, Shane, not because I want to continue anything with you!”

“I hate you, you know that?” Shane spat, before he stormed toward the door, and brushed past her mother, but Regina didn’t hesitate to rush after him, worried about what he might do to you if he passed you by - well, she would have been as worried as she was, until she noticed that you were gone from where you were standing, before.

🜸

Pain was all you felt, as you dragged yourself along the street, walking back toward your motorcycle. You’d made sure to leave the bouquet behind; you still wanted her to have it, regardless of her still being with Shane; you couldn’t bear to stick around, being reminded of their relationship. You tried not to blame her for any of it; you couldn’t, all you could do, was curse yourself for even thinking that maybe you and Regina would become anything more than what you already were.

🜸

“M-Mom? What are you talking about? She isn’t here, she’s-”

Regina faltered, noticing the bouquet on the ground, a pained expression on her face as Shane walked up to the doorway behind her, appearing smugger than he should.

“She left you,” he remarked, but Regina ignored him, shaking her head subconsciously as she crouched down to pick up the bouquet, her eyes darkening, “she doesn’t care about you-”

“Get out, Shane,” Mrs. George instructed, sick of his antics, by now, especially after all he and Regina had been through, and said to each other recently; she thought back to how nervous you seemed, holding the flowers as she opened the door, her heart sinking again - she could tell you cared about her, more than she’d ever presumed Shane to do so, even after how things had seemed between them last year, “you don’t need to be here, right now!”

“Fine,” he retorted, “because I don’t want to be here! We’re done, Regina.”

She wasn’t perturbed, at all, only worried about you, right now - where you would have gone, specifically; she was getting a bad feeling, and it scared her to think that maybe she’d never see you again, after today, her right hand shaking as she lifted the bouquet up off of the ground, her heart pounding all over again, the way it was, the day before, except this time with more dread than anticipation, her remembering how close your lips were to her’s, before today - if only that could be the case, right now; if only you’d not run away, believing she didn’t want you anymore.

🜸

You’d trusted many people in your lifetime; you thought maybe there were still some good ones, besides Cal - your Uncle - and Regina, but sometimes you still feared that maybe there’d never be a true place for you, with them. You remembered times from the dark rooms, and your broken bones, that there was a man you’d briefly considered to be more of a father figure, than your biological father was; he had often been the one to bring you your food; your water, no matter how disgusting it turned out being. He brought you a scratchy blanket, whenever you were cold, and you felt a little safer around him, until one night he’d had a fight with your kidnapper, before he came into your room, red-faced, and drunk, exactly like your father usually was, even more so after the divorce.

You swerved out of the way of an approaching car, wincing, but you didn’t let it phase you too much that it had almost hit you, small tears leaking from the corners of your eyes. In fact, you sped the motorbike up a tad, remembering how you cried when the man you thought you could trust within the kidnapper’s basement abused you; he did things to you, until your throat was raw, and burning from your screams - it was a little while, before the police had got to you.

You remembered Cal saying that you’d been brought back a shell of yourself, hardly ever smiling anymore; hardly ever talking, unless your voice was necessary, though you hated to hear it, now, before you’d met Regina. You remembered the phone call he had, between him and one of the officers involved in your case; how he’d told them - his voice shaking, but firm - that they better find the man, and kill him for what he’d done to you; for having you return to him, as if you’d already had everything carved out within you; you were better off, dying - it was like you’d only just come back to life, he said, but were now merely a zombie; you didn’t stick around for the call, and that’s why you didn’t intend to stick around anymore, now - not for much longer, anyway.

🜸

“But why would she-..?” Regina murmured, a pained expression on her face as she stared dejectedly down at the bouquet, wishing you’d stayed a little while longer, but her mother didn’t want to let things go like that, as she lifted her left hand up to her daughter’s right shoulder, a flicker of determination behind her loving gaze.

“I don’t know - she was right here, a couple of minutes ago,” June mused, whilst Regina subconsciously scowled at the thought of Shane again; how he’d driven you away, like her mother had informed her that he must have, considering she’d only told you that he and her were upstairs together, at the time, “but - judging by the looks of things - we shouldn’t stay to find out.”

Her mother’s decision took her aback as her heart skipped a beat, and she warily glanced up at June, her hands trying not to shake anymore than they were, currently, only to fail at the thought of you in danger, somehow, after what had just happened a brief moment ago, now.

“What?” Regina replied, shocked, whilst June grabbed her bag, coat, and car keys, sensing that she’d need them, tonight, like she had done the day you’d had a nightmare, and needed her daughter with you to stabilise you, somehow - it almost felt like a repeat of it, somehow, except this time neither of them knew where they were going to end up going, considering you’d taken off without letting either of them know regarding where your whereabouts might end up being, tonight.

“Just get in the car, Regina,” her mother instructed confidently; firmly, as she stepped out into the cold, “Olman’s already taken you away from me once, before - he will not do it again, do you understand me?”

“But-”

“Do you want to get Y/n back, or what?” She continued, desperate to get Regina out, before you could do anything stupid, like she feared you would, but before they could begin their search, June insisted that they check on Cal, first, just in case you really had gone back home, and weren’t anywhere out there when you shouldn’t be, but she guessed maybe it would have been better that she drop her daughter off at your Uncle’s first, considering it didn’t take you long to begin losing yourself, again, shortly after they’d arrived at his riding centre, in the first place.

🜸

You parked your motorcycle a little off road, your heart still pounding regardless of how much it felt as if it were currently being squeezed, right now. You dragged yourself along the sidewalk, not too far away from Northshore High, but still not very populated - you guessed that it being late helped that, as well; there weren’t often cars driving down this road at this time of night. You sighed heavily, your breathing pattern a little staggered and shaky; you’d still not been able to recompose yourself, your blood boiling, and entire body aching as if it were forgetting how to function completely, just because of Mrs. George’s revelation regarding Shane being there, with Regina.

You knew you probably shouldn’t be angry; dejected and a little jealous, sure, but angry? Your heart sank; you guessed you’d just been hoping that they would have been broken up, by now; she’d promised you she’d do it, as soon as she could, the day before, and you’d seen them talking during the school day, earlier. You didn’t dare break out the question, as soon as she arrived to work on your Uncle’s ranch again, simply smiling over at her as she passed by, and she couldn’t help, but smile timidly back at you, her eyes glinting a little as soon as they’d locked with your own.

You thought that smile had confirmed what you were hoping; it confirmed so many things to you - the main things being that you were definitely at risk of a lack of oxygen, whenever you were around her, as well as that you were definitely gayer than you thought you were, before, but the smile also made you feel like you were finally safe; finally happy, and free, as long as she were there beside you. You were elated, as soon as you felt her beside you, your heart pounding as you forgot how to breathe, her hair brushing against your left shoulder.

Just that memory, was enough to take you back to that moment, entirely, you envisioning the stable within your mind, as the wind picked up a little around you, a stray car passing by, but nothing stopped you, your vision clouding a little as you were brought back to a few hours ago, forgetting how to breathe yet again - if only you could live within moments like those; you knew you’d give anything to try.

•

You were mucking up the stalls again, by the time she’d got to you, lingering by the door anxiously for a moment, only for her expression to soften as soon as she saw you, her heart skipping a beat; she couldn’t believe how beautiful you were, everywhere she saw you. She didn’t realise she’d stopped breathing, until she heard Firenze snorting to her right; he was still in his stall, you in the one opposite him. She smiled softly, making to go over to him and Felicity, before she slowly walked up to you, once she’d greeted both of them with a gentle stroke, and ear scratch; they were steadily getting used to her being around, and she loved it - she loved everything about being here; loved everything about you.

Her heart staggered again, her breath catching in her throat at the thought, but she tried to recompose herself, before she continued forward, and was finally stood beside you, her hair tickling your left shoulder blissfully as your own heart skipped a beat, your own lungs forgetting how to breathe, alongside her’s, until you realised you should respond, if you didn’t want her to think of you as being strange, at all.

“Hey,” she began, a little exasperatedly, her voice close to a whisper, and you would falter, your heart beginning to pound as you tried not to shudder, your skin feeling a little tingly in response to her voice.

“H-Hi,” you managed, timidly, in response, and she couldn’t help, but beam over at you, her eyes glinting even more as you both stood there together, for a moment, until she held her hand in your’s, and you felt safer than you ever had, before.

“I missed-” You both began accidentally, not realising you were speaking over each other, until you fell quiet, and locked gazes blissfully, the realisation only setting in shortly before you’d begun to giggle breathlessly alongside one another, evidently amused, as well as a little flustered, by what had just happened between you both.

“So you did miss me, huh?” Regina guessed, and you would wince, tensing up a little, evidently embarrassed; it wasn’t really something you were used to saying, yet, though it did feel right on your tongue, whenever it was directed at her.

“O-Of course I did,” you answered, a little quieter than before, whilst you avoided her gaze, with more than much difficulty, “why - why wouldn’t I?”

“I don’t know,” she corroborated, evidently teasing, now, as she leaned closer to you, her right shoulder bumping your left one, “why wouldn’t you?”

You grew redder; stammering a bit more as you tried to find the right words, but your heart pounding in your ears didn’t help, at all.

“I-.. I don’t know, why - er-” You managed, appearing puzzled as well as frustrated as she’d evidently caught your tongue, prompting you to wince again as you silently cursed yourself for being so weak around her, but she couldn’t help, but find you adorable; she loved to make you speechless, the way she could tell she just had, just by teasing you the way she did, a brief moment ago.

“You’re adorable,” she remarked, before she leaned over to delicately connect her lips to your’s, and you couldn’t help, but melt into her touch, smiling softly against her lips as more blood rushed to your cheeks, and you felt like the luckiest girl in the world, even after all that had been done to you, years ago.

“You’re more adorable,” you mustered up, deciding it was your turn to be able to tease her, now that she’d done her own teasing, “I - you-.. did you miss me?”

She appeared taken aback by your question, her own heart skipping a beat, or two, as she affectionately connected her forehead to your own, her arms still around your waist, after you’d leaned the shovel against the wall to your right, deciding mucking up could wait, for a moment, or two, just because you’d not been able to talk to her all day, before now. A vision of you seeing Regina and Shane talking earlier invaded your mind, and your heart sank, your eyes darkening as you looked over at her, your eyes meeting her own again, but you tried to hide that it was paining you, not knowing yet if they’d broken up already, or were still together, despite your and her recent changes in relationship, lately.

“Duh, of course I did,” she answered, without hesitation, her eyes never leaving your own, “what kind of question even is that?”

“The same one you asked me, not too long ago, now,” you replied, and she would wince, remembering; the kiss had briefly disorientated her, until now, as she smiled sheepishly in your direction, her cheeks a little redder than they were, before.

“Right,” she mused, her voice ever so light, “I did, didn’t I?” You smirked over at her, evidently amused by her reaction as you held her even closer to you, hating any amount of distance between you both, right now. You hummed in response to what she already knew, a mischievous glint in your eyes as you did; you loved to see her flustered, that much was clear to her, right now - well, that and the fact that she was already missing your lips, against her own, but that was another story, right now. “And you really thought I forgot about that?” She teased, as if it weren’t true, and you couldn’t help, but simply allow your smile to grow, regardless of how warm your face felt, right now, just as a result of her teasing you the way that she was.

“Yes, ma’am,” you answered, simply, and she couldn’t explain how that made something switch within her, as she raised her eyebrows over at you, grinning again, before she leaned forward to kiss you once more - a little more of a passionate kiss, than the last one was; she couldn’t explain why in much detail, only that she’d liked you referring to her as ‘ma’am’ the way that she did, and your lips had been beckoning her own ever since the last had taken place. Let’s just say you both stayed in there for a little while, finishing up the mucking up of the stalls together, without anyone around to disturb you both, except the horses - you didn’t just spend the rest of that time making out again, but even if you did, who needed to know? You just wished it could’ve stayed the way that it was, before you’d heard about her and Shane being in her mother’s house together, regardless of what she’d promised to do for you, as soon as she possibly could.

🜸•🜸

This time, Cal was waiting on the porch. This time, the sound of gravel crackling under the tires didn’t soothe her. As soon as June pulled her car to a stop before the house, Regina hastily got out, her heart still pounding as she raced toward Cal, small tears streaming down her cheeks as the wind hit against her, but nothing could stop her as she rushed up the porch, and couldn’t stop herself as she threw her arms around him, crying quietly as she did. It didn’t make things any better, not seeing your motorcycle anywhere you tended to leave it, out here.

Cal would appear taken aback by Regina’s action, but his expression softened instantly when he heard her sniffling, prompting him to frown as he returned the hug, June walking hastily toward the porch with a worried expression on her face. That was when reality struck him; his eyes widened, and June nodded gravely, an apologetic look on her face - that night would be longer than they knew they could bear.

🜸

The cold was getting to you, at least a little bit. You bit against it, your mouth a thin line, but you didn’t hug yourself; you didn’t care to. You didn’t look back toward your motorcycle; you didn’t really care anymore - you just thought about Regina, and how you hoped she’d be happy, if you finally disappeared. You sighed heavily; a little dejectedly, like a light within you being extinguished; nothing felt the same anymore, and you knew that was probably stupid; that you shouldn’t be surprised about what had been happening recently, but it still hurt no matter what you thought about it; any of it - Regina and Shane; Regina and you.

In the end, you didn’t know why you cared; you’d been through worse, but - to be honest - the part of it that scared you was the one that told you you would rather be stuck in your kidnappers basement, than be here again, feeling as if you were just some play-thing. Maybe, it would have felt better - not that Regina would ever hurt you like that - if she’d just used you the way your kidnapper and his goons had; maybe your attachment to her then wouldn’t be hurting you so much, but you guessed it didn’t matter much anymore, anyway. What goes around, comes around, right? At least, that was all you could think, as you looked toward the bridge stood a few paces ahead of you.

🜸

“She’s gone,” Regina managed, her voice briefly trembling as Cal held her at arm’s length, a pained as well as terrified look on his face; he’d encountered you disappearing like this, before, and the last times it had happened - it wasn’t good.

He shivered, remembering how the police had often contacted him, saying they’d either found you in a makeshift puddle of your own blood, or fully submerged in water; they’d also found you one time, crying as they dragged you out of a store you’d attempted to rob, full of guns, and other weapons - you’d tried to openly steal one of the guns, and - upon noticing you’d been spotted - you tried to lift the gun to your head, only to be tackled to the ground, and have the shot be fired into the floor to your right. You’d tried many times to disappear, that much he knew.

He sighed heavily, as well as a little shakily, his breath showing in the cold air as June lifted her left hand to Regina’s back, a pained expression on her own face as she’d been hoping that maybe you’d be here, though she did get a bad feeling that you wouldn’t be, like you weren’t, now - invisible to the world, somewhere they feared you wouldn’t be found, until the phone ringed inside, and Cal didn’t hesitate to rush in, and answer the call.

🜸

It didn’t take you much, to be stood upon one of the railings of the bridge, looking down at the rushing water below; it didn’t scare you - not really. In fact, you thought it peaceful, your eyes darkening as you stared down at it, trying not to think of Regina; of Cal, and the horses, but you’d never stop believing that they didn’t need you; would never stop believing that you were pathetic - a presence to only burden them. You’d never be good enough, so why wait any longer?

You released the railing to your left, closed your eyes, and for once, all you could think about was falling, in another way.

🜸

Regina, and her mother anxiously awaited in the hallway as Cal spoke hastily on the phone, sounding as dejected and terrified as he looked, asking the person on the other side if they’d seen you, recently, earlier today, only for his eyes to darken, and expression to crumble as he replied with a dejected ‘thank you’, before setting the phone back down upon its stand. He prided himself on being a lover of old technology; he’d always had that phone, ever since he’d moved here, shortly before you’d been taken by your kidnapper, those years ago - you remembered how exited he’d got, seeing the place had a phone like that; you didn’t understand it at the time, but still it made you happy, to see that he was happy, being the only member of your family you felt you could trust whole-heartedly, the way you did him, even after you’d been taken the way you had, and abused as well as beaten almost to a pulp; to death - it was painful, thinking about how different things could have been.

Cal slowly turned toward them, and Regina faltered, a sense of dread taking over her as she shook her head hastily, and tried not to break down completely, no matter how hard it was to stay strong for you, as well as him, and herself, right now.

“It wasn’t Y/n, was it?” She guessed, before he could even open his mouth to say anything. Her voice cracked, but she didn’t give in. “Tell me it wasn’t her, please,” she begged, firmly; shakily, her blood boiling, and heart stuttering at the possibility of her never being able to see you, again, “please, Cal, just - just say something, anything, or - or I’ll-”

“It wasn’t her,” he confirmed slowly; half-heartedly, in a strained manner, “I’m sorry-”

“We have to go out, and look for her,” Regina stated, determined to bring you back, somehow, “we have to; we can’t just-”

“There’s nothing that can be done,” Cal contradicted gently, though it pained him as much to say it, wishing he could do more, “she’s unpredictable - if anything does happen, the police will tell me.” Before he added under his breath: ‘they always do’. He then gesticulated to the door of the living room, trying not to let his hands shake. “Please, come in; it’s gonna be a long night,” he requested, a silent urgency in his voice, “I-.. fear what I’ll do, if I’m to be alone, but-..”

June shook her head, before reassuringly lifting her right hand up to his left shoulder.

“You won’t be alone,” she promised, “because we’re here, and we always will be - for as long as you need us to be, won’t we, Regina?”

Regina hesitated, trying not to look toward the door, no matter how much she wished she could go out, and look for you, desperate to find you, and make sure that you’re okay, especially after you’d heard about her and Shane not breaking up yet, until now.

“Sure, I - I guess,” she answered, and Cal would express relied, glad to hear he wouldn’t be alone, whilst you were gone, before he smiled softly over at them both, and opened the door before him, the room too quiet, even as he led them into it - nothing would ever be the same, if you weren’t found, and fast; he just hoped it wasn’t too late, or it really would feel like the end of everything was near.

🜸

Regina was anxious; water flooded over you. It made your throat feel raw, as you struggled to breathe, the panic settling in. You didn’t know why you’d thought of her, as the water began to consume you; didn’t know why you wondered if she’d liked the roses, your heart sinking, and eyes darkening as your muscles slowly began to give in, even before the water had begun to tire you - there wasn’t much point to go on fighting, if you wouldn’t ever see her again.

You heard panicked voices; the squeaking of car’s braking as sunk slowly, staring dejectedly up at the surface until it stung your eyes enough to get you to close them tightly, but it didn’t make a difference - nothing ever would, until you were pulled up out of the water, and forced to start breathing again.

🜸

Regina couldn’t sit still - for the whole of the time it took, for the police to get in contact - she couldn’t calm herself down. She fidgeted with her hands, staring down at her lap, her right leg bouncing a little - that had never happened to her, before. She only occasionally glanced up at her mom, or at Cal, June trying to soothe her every once in a while by resting her hand gently upon her daughter’s knee; she hated seeing her like this, and wished she could do more for her, somehow, but neither she or Cal knew what to do with themselves.

They felt hopeless, knowing you were out there, somewhere, probably in an untrustworthy state of mind, after what you’d heard from June regarding Shane and her daughter, but no matter what they tried to say to each other; what they tried to think of to lighten the mood a little, the darkness was closing in, faster than they originally expected it to.

🜸

The light was unforgiving, as you were pulled out of the water, spluttering uncontrollably whilst you tried not to cry; the pain in your throat and chest was unbearable, and your muscles were weaker than you’d ever felt them. You squinted your eyes up at the sky - the starts were beautiful, tonight. You couldn’t help, but think about Regina again, wondering what it would be like, to lay beneath them, your arms around one another; fingers interlinked - nothing had ever looked so beautiful, before, as such a sight.

Your heart sank; you still feared maybe Regina would never want to do anything like that with you; she probably would rather not even see you, anymore, after today. That only made the feeling worse, as you scowled up at the sky, cursing the person who’d saved you, the way they did. You then remembered the police sirens; there were some steady approaching. You imagined a couple or so police cars, as well as an ambulance. It was exactly like the other time you’d tried to do this to yourself. Maybe even worse - this time, you were conscious, as you felt yourself failing yet again to take your life, the pain unbearably taunting, but it hadn’t extinguished the fire in your chest, yet; if you were going to end everything, it was going to be tonight, whether they liked it, or not.

🜸

“If she isn’t back in half an hour, I will be calling the police,” Cal stated - it was the first time he’d spoken, in a little while, now.

“I think that would be for the best,” June corroborated, her voice ever so gentle. Regina sank between them, feeling more helpless than she ever had before. She couldn’t believe she was just sitting there, her heart pounding, and face crumpling occasionally as she tried not to break down anymore than she already had, since they’d arrived here.

You were still at large, and she was terrified of what might happen to you; to her, after today - if she lost you, somehow, like she feared she would, soon, she didn’t know what she’d do to herself; didn’t know how she’d handle things, anymore, without you beside her; without being able to see you again, after school; after kisses; after every embrace you and her had ever shared. It was more painful than anything had ever felt, before, and she couldn’t take it, silently begging for you to come back, just so she could see that you were okay; just so she could tell you everything about how she felt about you, and could never want anything else, but to be with you, and you only.

She didn’t think anything of it, when the TV came to life.

🜸

You let yourself recompose, first, gathering at least some strength whilst someone spoke hastily on the phone a little further away from you, another person with a microphone, not too far away from them. You grimaced - how did they all get here, so fast? Though, you didn’t seem to have much concept of time, right now. You couldn’t remember how long you’d been unconscious when you were; it wasn’t for very long, that was all you could tell - you sighed barely audibly, still staring up at the sky whilst small white lights seemed to dance in your eye-line. The black spots were trying to deter them, but they wouldn’t go. You winced, a sharp pain shooting through your right side, as soon as you tried to move - this would be harder, than you thought it would be.

🜸

The remote shook in Cal’s right hand; he didn’t dare look over at his guests. Regina kept her eyes glued down to her hands, whilst June warily looked on at the TV screen, fidgeting with her own fingers as the usual news reporter read out all the recent headlines. If it weren’t for the next one being interrupted by the announcement of new breaking news, maybe they wouldn’t have found you, again.

🜸

“Don’t move,” one of the paramedics advised gently, whilst the police warded off any civilians crowding around the area, to give you space, you guessed. “You’re okay,” the woman continued, as you tried to scoot away from her, only to wince again, a quiet whimper escaping your lips; the pain was excruciating, and you didn’t notice that you were bleeding, until the paramedic carefully lifted your t-shirt, revealing a long scratch running down to your waist - you must have caught something, after jumping into the water; your skin must have been nicked by a rock at the bottom, or the side - you heard her say, to one of her peers; she was trying to speak quietly, but you knew.

You cursed barely audibly, your voice shaking as you glanced down at the scratch again, watching the blood seeping down slowly, almost covering your entire side as it went. You groaned, before letting your head drop back down onto the ground - concrete, of course; you cursed again.

“You’re going to be okay,” another of them said, as they held their hand carefully over your wound, and you winced, wishing you could slap it away, but you couldn’t feel much of yourself, right now. “We’ve got you-”

“Let go of me,” you uttered, your voice weak, and sounding strained, as if you were using all of your energy to talk to them, just as they began to carefully lift you off of the ground as soon as the stretcher was brought out for you.

“We can’t do that, I’m afraid,” the first paramedic began again, smiling sympathetically down at you as they laid you upon the stretcher, but this wasn’t it. You wouldn’t let them take you away. That’s why you kicked your legs out beneath you, before you got up off of the stretcher after startling the two women who’d been trying to help you, and tried to run as fast as you could toward the bridge again.

🜸

It started with the reporter mentioning something about the bridge nearby, almost on the way to Northshore high, but Regina didn’t lift her head, until June gasped, and Cal dropped the remote.

🜸

You climbed back up onto the railing, your heart racing as you stared back down at the water again, listening to the panicked shouts behind you, but nobody dared get any closer, worried about what you might do, if they tried.

“Miss, stop! Please!” One of them called, you shrugged, grimacing subconsciously in response to their voices.

“Get down!” Another demanded - probably one of the officers stood next to the paramedics, but still you remained perched upon the railing, not daring to move even an inch as you tensed up, your eyes beginning to water a little whilst a lump formed within your throat; the fear was starting to set in, now. You closed your eyes again; you were determined to make today the end of everything.

🜸

“Shit,” Cal spat, as he hastily got up off of his chair, before rushing out to the phone again, Regina hot on his heels whilst her mother followed behind her, shocked; she couldn’t believe what she’d seen on the screen - you in the background, stood on the railing of the bridge, whilst the reporter talked about the situation to the woman who had been speaking, earlier, giving the other pieces of news, before your situation had come up. “I-.. I need to call them; the - the police; I need to speak to her-”

“What if they don’t let you?” Regina questioned, terrified, her voice briefly trembling. “What if they don’t-”

“They will,” Cal interjected, determined to talk to you, “I will make them, if they don’t - I will drive right down there, and push through them if I have to - I’m not letting her jump; I - I can’t, I-”

“It’s okay,” June cooed, trying to soothe him as she rested her left hand upon his right shoulder; his hands shook, as he reached for the phone. This was going to be too hard to stay strong through, no matter how much he knew he should try and be as strong as he possibly could, for you, right now.

🜸

It started with the police talking in quiet, worried, and hushed voices. You didn’t dare look back at them, still, staring down at the water with slightly widened eyes; your legs shaking a little beneath you - you didn’t know why you couldn’t get yourself to jump, but you were terrified. Again, you thought about Regina, about Cal, and the horses. About all you could lose, even if you weren’t sure whether they still wanted you, after everything.

“We’re trying,” you heard one of them say behind you, their voices a little more raised than they were, before, “doing everything we can, Mr. L/n, but-”

You tensed up at the mention of your Uncle, your breath hitching in your throat as you subconsciously shook your head, before looking around behind you, until your gaze fell upon the woman holding a microphone, a few paces away from you, now, a camera filming every word she spoke, and every expression that appeared on her face. You didn’t know what to think; how to feel, you just stared ahead of you, a heavy lump in your throat as small tears began to cloud your vision all over again - you just wished they would give up on you; just wished they’d stop caring; even you knew you weren’t worth the hassle. You wished you could just throw yourself in, if only your muscles weren’t stopping you from doing so.

🜸

“You’re not trying hard enough!” Cal retorted, like a hiss, and the officer would scowl in response to his accusation.

“There’s not much that we can do, sir, please try and remember that - if you were in our situation-”

“Give me the phone,” Regina interjected, her voice firm; she was determined to get through to you, somehow.

Cal would appear taken aback, evidently shocked by her interjection as he looked back at her, a pained expression on his face again.

“But-”

“Please,” she begged, her voice briefly trembling as he appeared conflicted, not sure what to do with himself.

“I-”

“This might be good for her, Cal; to speak to Regina,” June corroborated gently, “if only for a minute, or two? Who knows? She might actually listen to her, and come back home?”

“She’s not going anywhere, after this,” Cal stated, before warily looking back toward Regina, and nodding determinedly, relieving her as she allowed a barely audible sigh to escape her lips, a small tear leaking down her right cheek; she only hoped she could do what she could, for you, no matter what it meant for your and her relationship, after today - she couldn’t let you go on any longer not knowing that it was you; that it had always been you, she just wished she could have told you that, before you’d turned up at her door, and heard from her mother that she and Shane were still together, before this moment in time.

🜸

You imagined dropping back into the water, your eyelids fluttering shut. The wind blew through your locks, and for a moment it felt like water, as you imagined yourself being submerged within it - how it had felt, before, until the person who’d saved you had pulled you out, though you’d not wanted to be saved, at all. You sighed dejectedly, your breath barely audible, and showing in the cold air. You watched it drift away from you, before it disappeared completely - maybe this night would have been nice, if not for what had brought you out here, in the first place.

“Miss L/n!” One of the officers called, and you tensed up again, your heart skipping a beat as your eyelids fluttered open again. “We have someone on the line who says they want to talk to you!” He continued, and you winced, before scoffing, shaking your head, and bowing it again.

“If it’s Cal, tell - tell him that - that I’m not stopping,” you spat, your voice weak, and shaky, as you yourself tried not to break down, alongside your waiting companions back at Cal’s ranch, “in fact, you can tell him to fuck off, for all I care! I can make my own decisions, now - I’m not a baby, anymore; I never was one.”

“That’s all very well, Y/n,” another of the officers spoke - a female voice you recognised; you’d had many dealings with her, like this one, but each time you seemed to forget her name, wincing as well as trying not to laugh at the irony of it all - so many times, you’d been saved by her as well as other officers, and paramedics, when all you could think of, was how you wished your kidnapper and his goons had killed you, whenever they got the chance, all those years ago. “But it isn’t Cal,” she revealed, and you would falter, evidently taken aback as you looked back at her, evidently shocked, as well as a little confused, your eyes full of a silent dread you couldn’t conceal, only to be heightened as soon as she continued with the words: “it’s a girl claiming to be a friend of your’s - do you know a Miss Regina George, by any chance?”

🜚

Your heart stuttered, before you crumpled before them, your eyes wide, and wet, a pained expression crossing your face all over again.

“I-.. W-What?” You managed, your voice weaker than the officer had ever heard it, before, prompting her expression to soften as she tilted her head partially, before making to come closer to you, only for you to hastily shake your head, and turn back toward the water, as if readying yourself to jump again.

She faltered in step, shaking her head alongside your own as she stopped in place, worried you might convince yourself to do something stupid, if she got any closer to you than she was, now.

“Okay,” she cooed gently, “it’s okay - I won’t come any closer; here-.. I’ll slide the phone over to you, and you can pick it up, if you want to - go ahead.”

She then crouched down low, before sliding her phone over to where you were, it stopping a few paces away from you as you stared dejectedly down at the water below you, wondering what Regina might be thinking of you, right now - how dejected, and disappointed she might be, but at the same time you doubted she’d be upset, if you disappeared, today. You drew in a shaky breath, before nodding gravely, and carefully getting down off of the railing, your heart aching more than it ever had before, no matter how much it elated you to think about hearing her voice again, the way you thought you would, soon, as long as you went ahead with answering the call.

You lingered by the phone, for a moment, warily looking up at her; the officer stood a few paces away from you, enduring yet another attempt to save your life, despite all the other times she’d done so, before. She nodded reassuringly, smiling softly as you narrowed your eyes in her direction, evidently skeptical of what she’d do, if you took the phone up, and looked away from her for at least a second, or two.

“If you even try to stop me from-”

“We won’t,” she interjected gently, before you could even finish your sentence, “not physically, anyway; that doesn’t help anyone.”

“Okay,” you replied slowly, still sounding a little unsure as you leaned down to pick up the phone, subconsciously wincing, and even flinching a little as you looked back up at them, only to discover they were all still where they were, before. You expressed relief, before backing a little further away from them, and then bowing your head, your heart feeling as if it were being squeezed as you turned away to glance back down at the water.

It took you more than a little strength, to bring yourself to lift the phone up to your ear.

🜸

“Hello?” Your voice prompted her heart to skip a beat, and her to forget how to breathe for a moment; she couldn’t explain it, but it was look a warm rush of relief ran through her - she liked to hear you were still there, with her; still existing, beside her, even if you weren’t anywhere near her, right now.

“Hey,” she managed, her voice cracking a little as she tried to hold herself together for you, no matter how hard it was for her to do so, especially now that she knew what you could do, if she and the others weren’t careful with you.

Cal warily watched her for a moment, until he expressed relief upon hearing her respond to you, reassuring him that you were still there; still alive, and breathing, despite your previous threats to jump, if ever the officers and paramedics got any closer to you than they were, now.

“I-..” You fell quiet, a pained expression on your face as you tried to get the words out, only to fail miserably, your throat closing up as you tried to swallow the lump within it.

“I’m sorry,” Regina managed, and you would falter again, a hurt look on your face as you hastily shook your head; you didn’t want her to feel as if she had to apologise, when you believed yourself to be the only problem, here. “Y/n, I-”

“They say heartbreak really fucks with you,” you mused, your voice briefly trembling, and she would falter, her heart sinking as she nodded slowly, her eyes darkening; she couldn’t stand hearing how she’d hurt you, the way she knew she had. “I-”

“The stars are pretty tonight, aren’t they?” Regina interjected gently, and you would appear taken aback, subconsciously looking up at them - they were always pretty, when you had someone like her to share them with.

Your heart skipped a beat, and she smiled softly, hearing you say ‘they are’ a little lighter, as if she were reigniting something within you, just by being there with you, the way that she was.

“They really are,” you added slowly; thoughtfully - heavily; so heavily that it hurt her more than anything else ever had, before, “I just-… I guess I just wish-”

“Stop,” she whispered shakily, and you would fall quiet again, swallowing thickly as another small tear leaked slowly down your right cheek, “I-.. I can’t-”

“But it’s true,” you stated, your heart sounding as if it were breaking several times over almost as much as your voice was, alongside her own, “I never-.. Regina, I-”

“You can’t,” she spat, her voice strained, “you just can’t, okay? I need you, I fucking love you, Y/n, okay!? I love you!”

Cal frowned, hearing it was hurting the both of you, to be talking like this; to be away from each other, when all you needed was to be together, like he’d always hoped you would be. You didn’t know what to say for a moment, your heart throbbing; jumping, as you thought, and clung to each of her words, imagining all you’d ever dreamt about - everything you’d ever wanted, living a life with her. You drew in another shaky, and slow breath, your blood pulsing in your ears as you tried to find the right words, to say; tried to hold yourself together, though every minute felt like an extra hour pulling your insides apart.

You focused on the water; the light glimmering upon its surface as you smiled softly down at the sight, but your smile didn’t last long - how could it, when she weren’t beside you? When you couldn’t stop thinking about everything bad; how you could never be good enough, for her, no matter how much you longed to be more, for her, and her only. Your eyes darkened, and you felt lost, again; it took a lot, not to let yourself drop then and there, if she weren’t on the other side of the phone line.

“I-.. I’m sorry, Reg, but-.. there’s nothing left for me, anymore; nothing left of me - I can’t let you live out your life wanting to spend it on something that’s been broken, rather than refurbished,” you uttered, and before she could even respond, you hung up the phone, and let yourself fall forward - you knew it probably wouldn’t work, but there was nothing left to do, but keep trying - right?

~~~~~

Hope you enjoyed it, and are looking forward to the next one! ❤️

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